#i wonder how long it will take for me to forget some crucial piece of information and check a guide | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

Tumblr has a low social media market share in South America.

#i wonder how long it will take for me to forget some crucial piece of information and check a guide

nebulous-frog · 11 months

Text

hoping for more (Ch1/10)

Relationships: Jon/Martin/Tim, QPR Tim/Sasha

Summary: Tim wishes Jon and Martin would warm up to each other- the archives can’t handle much more of this awkward, tense energy. When Martin starts living at the archives, things begin to change. Tim sees an opportunity to ease the tension, get Martin and Jon more in sync, tease his friends goodnaturedly, and fall in love. Wait, fall in love?? Oh, dear. That wasn’t supposed to happen. He’s sure he’ll be happy so long as they’re happy… (and they’re sure he’s a crucial piece of that arrangement)

AN: This is for the @bunnies-in-the-archives event! This fic got... much longer than I'd expected, lol, so I've broken it up into chapters that I'll be posting soon (aiming for one every few days, depending on my work schedule! They're ready to go, it just takes a bit of coordination to get them out lol).

My wonderful artist is @yakov-ukha, who made some fantastic art that I could stare at all day! Massive thank-you to you <3

Link to AO3 Fics Masterlist ART

Martin took a deep breath at the base of the steps of the Institute. The last few days had been rough, but it was Friday. He’d keep his head down, do his work, and have a nice self care weekend to forget all about it. He just had to make it through the day.

As he opened the door, he heard a voice call his name.

“Martin! Wait up!” Tim came bounding up the steps, a tray of to-go mugs precariously tipping in one hand and a paper bag clutched in the other.

“Morning, Tim,” Martin replied as he held the door. He mustered up a smile, pretending he wasn’t as tired as he felt.

“Thanks, wasn’t sure what my plan was here,” Tim joked, gesturing with his full hands at the door and crossing the threshold.

Martin nodded and followed Tim inside. “Of course. What’s all that for?”

“Just some morning goodies for the crew. I’ve got some muffins in the bag for everyone, plus everyone’s drink orders. Things have felt a bit… tense this week, wanted to end it on a high note. There may or may not be an extra treat for my favorite former library assistant.” Tim grinned and bumped Martin’s arm with his elbow.

Martin laughed, blushing. “Oh, that’s nice of you. It’s definitely been a bit of a tough week, it’ll be nice to have a good start today.”

“Sure thing, man, you deserve it,” Tim said with a wink.

The muffins weren’t just for the group morale, Martin knew. They weren’t even just a pick-me-up for him, specifically. He noticed the way Jon’s eyebrows raised in surprise and interest for a moment before dropping back into his affected scowl- his clear attempt at seeming more in control and boss-like- and he noticed how Jon’s posture and steps weren’t as severe as usual. It sucked that his boss needed treats in a bid to boost his mood so he wouldn’t be so mean, but Martin couldn’t argue with the results. For the first time all week, he made it through the whole morning and most of the afternoon without any conflict with Jon, either in the bullpen or in Jon’s office.

Unfortunately, he didn’t quite make it to the end of the day. About an hour before they would all clock out, Jon’s door opened suddenly.

“Martin,” Jon barked. He was glaring down at a file Martin was fairly certain he had delivered to his desk earlier that afternoon. “I need to speak with you immediately.” He turned around and disappeared from the doorway.

Martin felt Sasha and Tim’s worried glances as he sighed, closing his eyes for a moment to brace himself before walking across the room to face whatever he’d apparently done wrong this time.

Out in the bullpen, Tim pulled out a sticky note and quickly folded it into a little origami heart. He drew a duck wearing a top hat, hoping the randomness would surprise a smile out of Martin whenever this impromptu meeting ended, and he rested it on Martin’s keyboard. Sasha nodded at him approvingly, and they both turned back to their work to wait.

A few minutes later, Tim looked up when he heard Jon’s door shut. Martin was walking out, face bright red, looking utterly exhausted.

“Hey, Martin. You okay?” Tim asked cautiously.

Martin startled, seemingly lost in his head. He looked up and briefly met Tim’s eye before looking anywhere else. “I- Yes, I’m fine. It’s just- it’s fine. Just didn’t include my citations properly again. I’ll just… I’ll be in the break room for a minute.” He nodded to himself, then walked to his desk to pick up his mug on the way out the door.

Sasha caught Tim’s eye and gestured with her head towards Martin’s retreating figure. Tim sighed and stood to follow.

A promotion to a job like this definitely was stressful, Tim told himself. Of course Jon’s been acting differently. Gertrude left the archives surely worse than she found them, to a degree where even a conservative estimate would suggest it would take decades to undo her mess. Jon didn’t have archival experience or a degree in it, and Elias was always pushing for more. It made total sense that Jon’s stress was such that he’d turned into a bit of a dick.

It just hurt that Jon hadn’t seemed to have noticed.

When he entered the break room, Martin was shuffling some boxes of tea around in the cabinet and the electric kettle was already heating.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Tim asked, standing in the doorframe.

Martin sighed, shoulders slumping, arm still outstretched in the tea cabinet. “I- I don’t know what to say.” He settled on some chamomile and pulled it out with two mugs.

Tim knew chamomile wasn’t Martin’s first choice, knew that he only picked it because Tim liked it. He wished Martin would make whatever would actually soothe himself, but he didn’t say anything; Martin was the sort of person who relaxed most when his care instincts could be used on someone else.

“That’s understandable.” Tim took the milk from the fridge and passed it over, then leaned back against the counter.

“I’m just- I don’t know what to do anymore? I don’t- I can’t figure out what I’m doing wrong, it seems like there’s always something new.”

Tim nodded sympathetically. “If it helps, I don’t think it’s anything to do with you, really.”

Martin scoffed. “What do you mean? He only ever chews me out, I know you and Sasha have noticed. Definitely feels like it’s me.”

“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that,” Tim reassured quickly. “He’s absolutely the harshest with you in totally unjustifiable ways. I just meant that while you’re the target, it’s not necessarily personal.”

Martin shot him a look that clearly conveyed every ounce of skepticism he contained.

Tim’s lips quirked in a small smile. “I know, I know. Jon just knew me and Sasha back in research, we have history. Jon and I have been friends a long time, and he knows Sasha would eviscerate him if he was this nitpicky with her. He hasn’t given you a chance and he hasn’t given you the benefit of the doubt, so he’s decided you’re an easy target for his stress. That’s not excusing it, not by any means- he needs to get it together and do better- I only mean that it’s really not you. It’s him.”

The kettle clicked off and Martin began pouring the tea in silence for a moment. He sighed again.

“Yeah. Has he always been like this?”

Tim shrugged. “Sort of? Not this intense, but he’s not the most aware and he didn’t particularly handle his stress well in research, either. But he’s gotten more uptight and less personable. He used to laugh at my jokes and make his own jokes. He’d get this little grin whenever he’d manage to make someone laugh, it was always…” Tim sighed and shook his head, clearing it of the memories of that cute smile and the adorable snort noise Jon would make if he was surprised enough with a joke. Jon’s cute idiosyncrasies were not the point. “I think the stress of this job has really affected him.”

Martin hummed and blew on his tea before taking a sip. “That makes sense. I wish I’d gotten to know him before now. Maybe this would’ve been easier.”

“Maybe, yeah. I’m going to try to get him to get away more, at least get him to do something outside of work every once in a while. Maybe that’ll help him relax a bit? I miss my friend, and I’m tired of watching you walk out of his office all sad. It’s not fair of him to be like this.”

“Oh. Yeah, I suppose. Just… don’t tell him we talked about this, yeah?”

Tim shot Martin a horrified look. “Of course not! What happens in the break room stays in the break room. I’ve got your back. Besides, getting him to chill out wouldn’t just hopefully help you, it could also make the whole work culture better, make my job easier to do, and maybe even get my friend back, at least a bit. Trust me, I’ve been thinking about this a lot now, and especially after this week. Something has to change.”

A small smile graced Martin’s lips. “Right. I’m glad it’s not just me being sensitive, that you’ve noticed it, too.”

“Definitely. And Sasha has, too. We much prefer it when you’ve got that smile brightening the room,” Tim said with a wink.

Martin snorted and rolled his eyes. “Okay, that’s enough of that, then. I’m getting back to work.”

As they left the break room together, Tim graciously did not mention Martin’s blush.

#tma #jmart #bunnies in the archives

7 notes · View notes

isahebec · 2 years

Note

When you are feeling insecure, what do you think is the best way to remind you of how loved you really are?

An interesting question which I hopefully can successfully answer!

I guess truthfully right now I am still figuring that one out so I'll write a list and see what comes out:

• Speak to loved ones 💌

I guess this may seem like an obvious one but sometimes I go into my own little world and forget that there are people out there who enjoy being around me, no matter what mood or state I am in which is SO uplifting and freeing in more ways than imaginable. If I am so convinced in believing a thought to ask kindly, rather than to assume.

• Write ✍️

Usually on a word document, notes app or on here. I prefer to type as I have a strong disliking to my handwriting and I hate the way my words sit and look at me on the page. A few years ago I purchased a typewriter for this very reason but since it's so noisy and requires a lot of patience, I gradually stopped using it. I will be sure to use it again though one of these days. It's a fun little thing to make use of.

• Get involved in other hobbies 🎨

Make moodboards, draw, colour, get some fresh air, take photos, listen to a beautiful piece of music. Be reminded of the beauty in life and the simplicity of it.

• Post online 💻

Which I guess sort of covers the writing one as I often upload my writing to the internet. I am so sick and tired of people saying social media in general is toxic. Yes, social media can be toxic, depending on the way you use it but it can also be a wonderful tool to create, express and connect. If you are feeling bad each time you log off, be wary of your following and what you are looking at. It took me a long time to be honest with myself with this kind of thing i.e. the types of people I was following on social media and the media I was consuming.

• Educate yourself 📖

Read, read, read. If I'm going through a difficult time with my mental health, I will read/watch and listen to other people's experiences and discover how they themselves dealt with such crucial times. Also what gets them through when they may find themselves in a similar situation. I'd say researching mental health as a whole, how to take care of our own and others.

Reminding myself that I'm not alone and none of us truly are.

6 notes · View notes

cheekygreenty · 3 years

Note

Hi, I just saw your prompt list for Shadow&Bone!! could you possibly do No. 2 from Angst, but like with a happy ending? Like reader n Kirigan are togeather but then Alina's comes along.. just, please let be happy at the end. I like angst, but my heart can't handle sad endings 😢😢 thank you!!! ❤❤

Future- The Darkling x Reader

(Very very angsty with a happy (?) ending. It made me cry a lil bit writing it ngl)

You trusted him, wholeheartedly. At least that's what you told yourself every day since she came to the Little Palace; the place you had always called home, where you felt safe from the prying eyes of the public.

Yet now, the place was fueled by harsh rumors of him and her. Everywhere you went you could hear a whisper, nobody tried to hide it anymore, the words were always entirely devoted to your crumbling union;

'I thought they were happy'

We were.

'How can he and Alina not be together, it's destiny.'

I'm starting to think so too.

You didn't acknowledge it. Just put on a sweet smile and a brave face. Don't let them see you're hurting. Even in your own home, you had to pretend and lie, which at the end of the day, when you laid in an empty bed, made you exhausted.

He told you she meant nothing more to him than a mere weapon. But that was when she first came and when he still managed to make it to your shared chambers and would whisper sweet nothings as you fell asleep.

It was different now, on more than one occasion you caught a glimpse of them together, him looking at her the way he always looked at you. However much he claimed to be a good actor and manipulator, there was something there and he couldn't deny it either.

You hadn't confronted him about it yet fearing that if you did, the truth would hurt and sting and make all those rumors true. In addition, you haven't seen him in days and the last time you did, he told you to stay away from the wonderful Sun-Summoner.

The truth was you knew deep down in your heart that she wasn't at fault. That she was not the root of the problem. You constantly fought with yourself to stop any hatred you felt towards her. She was lovely, kind compassionate, and innocent. She didn't deserve to feel your wrath.

But with that came the confusion of who to blame. You or Him. It made you tired and weak. The smallest of tasks made you drained and tears would well in your eyes at the thought of having to live another day like this, a day full of questioning yourself and the man you loved more than anything in the world.

No matter how much of a strong person you swore you were, this was taking a substantial toll on you. He had become your support network and he knew it, he loved it. He always said he finally felt appreciated when you came around, that he wasn't alone anymore. He had conditioned you to be this way. When times got tough, he was always your shoulder to cry on.

No doubt that shoulder was now next to Alina. Perhaps they went on a horse ride, visited the Black Heretic fountain, or were enjoying a rendezvous next to the lake.

You didn't want to know, all that mattered was that he wasn't there with you when you were falling apart. Maybe you relied on him too much.

You wondered if he noticed the whispers too, or the way you'd been missing crucial meetings, or even if he noticed you wearing your red kefta more often, ditching the black once you'd heard Genya speak of making a golden-black kefta for Alina, per the Darkling's request.

That was a punch in the gut. It hurt more than him avoiding conversation with you or even his deterrence of touching you. He had bestowed his colors to her when not even three months ago he didn't know she existed. It had taken you a long time to gain his trust and don his signature black yet all she had to do was waltz in and show up. And it hurt.

And now here you were, training the next generation of heartrenderers, as you did almost every day. You had given your life to the Little Palace and its Grisha and this is how you were being repaid. Not even Ivan, who you had shaped into an excellent soldier, had looked your way lately.

'Excuse me Ms. Y/L/N I have an urgent request from the General' You whipped your head around to the young Grisha boy with an obviously hurt look on your face which he couldn't understand.

'Of course' you choked out and took the piece of paper from his hands and watched him in sorrow as he left.

Ms.Y/L/N? what happened to moya sovereignny? You were never one to uphold the formality, but this was just another blow to your confidence. You were no longer referred to as his other half which only meant your position in the palace was quickly dwindling.

You opened the wax-sealed envelope and took out the thick sheet of paper. There was a time when he himself would deliver the news to you himself and use it as an excuse to spend extra time with you.

'I cannot make it to the meeting with the King this evening, attend and report back to me anything relevant, no horse business'

You scoffed loudly, drawing attention from the young Corporalki around you and leaned on the table in front of you. Not even a please or thank you. With the note clutched in your hand and tears of frustration in your eyes, you stormed out of the Corporalki room and towards his war room.

You peeked through the open door and seen him. He didn't look at all busy as he chatted with Zoya, Ivan, Fedyor, and some other Squaller you didn't recognize. Zoya threw her head back in laughter at something Fedyor said but Aleksander kept his stony expression. You threw the door open dramatically and everyone froze.

'Leave us' you cautioned as Aleksander's onyx eyes looked right into your own.

Nobody moved but Zoya was the first to speak ' Y/N, we're actually in a meeting if you couldn't tell' while everyone nodded along, except him.

You never had anything against anyone in that room, but in that moment you couldn't help yourself and used your small science to bring everyone to their knees in front of you, except him.

'Leave us' His voice rang out in the midst of their sharp breaths and chest-clutching. They scrambled to their feet and left one by one, Fedyor quietly muttering 'moya sovereignny' as he passed you which filled you with some courage. The door shut and the sound echoed over the walls.

You threw the note across the room and let it hit his arm. 'Did you forget your manners General? Or does it only apply to the people you claim to love?'

'Funny you should say that Y/N, you haven't attended any meetings in weeks without providing a reason. You're making me look like a fool'

'I'M MAKING YOU LOOK LIKE A FOOL?!' Your tears were now streaming down your face, falling quicker than you could wipe them away.

He stayed silent and that broke your heart even more, he could've said something, anything.

'Aleksander, I'm trying to keep myself together for everyone, I'm trying so very hard to appear normal and happy but I don't think I can do this any longer. The whispers and the rumors, watching you and her-' You slid down the door and sat on the floor, head resting on your knees. '-It's getting to me.... and it's killing me.'

You thanked the Saints you didn't see his face, for the silence spoke for itself. He didn't deny anything or reach out to comfort you. I've lost him.

'All I wanted was a happy ending.' You laughed a sad laugh that pulled at his heartstrings. With your eyes still facing away from him, you didn't see his hand go up to wipe the lone tear that fell down his face or the slight shake in his hands as he did so. He had no words that would comfort you. He knew what he'd done. He'd been avoiding you ever since he realized it. He didn't want to see you cry or see how his actions affected you.

Telling you that it means nothing to him was of no use. You had it in your mind now, forever engrained around his name, the rumors wouldn't stop and Alina was still around. He truly felt nothing of importance for her. All she meant for him was a key to a better future with you.

He approached you slowly, getting down on his knees next to you. He took your hand in his and held it up to his lips. He never prayed, but right now he silently muttered words to all the Saints. Don't let her leave.

'I'm so sorry Darling. Y/N I love you so much.'

'But you love her more' You yanked your hands away.

'NO. no. Y/N. I swear it. You are everything to me' He had grown serious now, he wanted you to look at him. He missed you.

'Then explain why you're parading her around like a Queen, letting her wear your colors, probably sleeping in her bed'

'I have never toucher her in that way. I'm yours Y/N.' Please look at me.

You lifted your head and looked at his beautiful face. He too looked tired, exhausted. His eyes were red and puffy. Saints, I've never seen him cry.

'You will have a happy ending. I promise Darling' He took your face into his hands and connected your foreheads together. 'I promise. I'm doing everything I can to make sure you will, and even if I can't, I swear you will you and our children-'

Children. Aleksander never spoke of them to the point where you had settled with the idea you'll never have them. Something about the desperation in his voice made you believe him, Aleksander was strong, he never gave up but he also never sacrificed himself for anybody. Up until now, you didn't think yourself worthy enough to be saved in exchange for him.

'-I would give up everything to see you and them safe, away from harm's way. Right now, the world doesn't deserve them, but once I do what I have to do, I'll give you children. However many you want, Just stay. Please'

You were borderline hysterical as you melted into his embrace. Weeks of frustration and hurt disappeared into thin air. Aleksander held you so tight you were having trouble breathing but you didn't care. He held you all day and all night. All meetings and tasks forgotten.

He explained everything in detail, from the stag and firebird to what happens if things don't go to plan. He kept nothing from you, not even the stress and pressure he felt. You comforted him as he always does to you. You fell asleep together and dreamed of a life with a happy ending, one where you never had to doubt his motives, you dreamed of your future.

Taglist (if you want to be added, plz tell me!)

@theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld

@0-artemis

#shadow and bone #grisha #imagine #the darkling #the darkling x reader #alexander #alexander morozova #alina starkov #fanfic #ben barnes #general kirigan x reader #black general

542 notes · View notes

talkfantasytome · 3 years

Note

I would like to know an opinion from you, who is a reader and writer, without favoritism using more the logic and facts of the book.

What are the chances of G+A, E+A and E+L happening in ACOTAR and why do you think so?

By logic I think G+A has an 85% chance of happening, for several factors pointed out in the books and in interviews. E+L I have doubts because it depends on what will happen in the next book and E+A for me is dead

Hi there!

Interesting question! And a tough one to ask me to answer as a writer and a reader, but also just to use logic and facts. I'll do my best, but admittedly, on some points in may appear as more of an opinion as a writer, or my own interpretation being a writer and understanding how things can be done.

However, I did really love including that focus in my answer! I did try to keep out favoritism and stick to logic. Admittedly, when asking specifically about all three ships, I'm now including all in one post and I'm sure one will appear favored, so I apologize for that. However, I did stick to facts of the book and facts about SJM - since you asked about my thoughts as a reader and writer, I felt I had to bring in certain things we know about SJM, in particular her style and the stuff she's likely to do.

This is a very big question you're asking, though. So, a fair warning, this post is very long. I have provided the word count below so people will have fair warning. There is also a TL;DR section at the bottom (before the post divider above my disclaimers) with a paragraph on each pair, for those interested in my opinions but don't wish to go deep into facts and thoughts.

I only ask that if anyone is looking to discuss this with me further, for any reason, that you do read the full post first before coming back to me with questions or concerns. :)

WC: 8,821

If you're interested, please keep reading for the ramblings of a mad woman...

The first thing I want to talk about is:

Foreshadowing.

Foreshadowing is the technique of hinting at future events in a story using subtle parallels, usually to generate more suspense or engage the reader’s curiosity. (Grammarly)

Writers, publishers, and readers all f*ing love foreshadowing. Even if you're a fan of big surprises and plot twists, foreshadowing is such an amazing and wonderful thing to see. I think it's because, even as a reader, even if you want something to completely throw you off guard, when you go back and see the foreshadowing later on, you respect it. And it makes you appreciate that author's craft. And true readers - as well as writers, of course - love to do that. As a reader, I loooove when an author does something that foreshadows something to happen in two or three books. As a writer, I strive to be like that.

But an important note to make about foreshadowing - it's typically about using "subtle parallels", once that could generate suspense or engage our curiosity. That's just something to keep in mind throughout this piece.

If you don't take the time to think about foreshadowing, and to understand its importance to writers and readers alike, then you're not going to be able to think critically about questions like this. And you're going to write a lot off as just something to make the readers happy or something a little pretty or fun.

And you'll also forget how crucial foreshadowing is. It is important, but it's hard to do, and it's not going to be done on something minor. You're not going to foreshadow what someone is going to make for dinner that night - not unless the choice of meal, or that meal itself, will end up being a vital plot point.

Similarly, you're not going to foreshadow things like, say, future possible relationships just to make that relationship an "oh, look, they're just platonic friends with minimal importance in that relationship". No. If you're foreshadowing something that will become just a friendship, it's going to be a massive, live-or-die, most important, life-altering friendship. It's going to be a friendship that changes the course of the characters lives.

So, having given that small lesson, I'd also challenge all readers of this post to read everything I've said with foreshadowing in mind as well. In some places I bring it up and mention it more, but I feel like foreshadowing is the most important literary device in questions like this. So as you read, see if there are other parts I bring up that are also foreshadowing, but I didn't say were foreshadowing. I think you might be surprised at how much it is laced through everything, just as it is extremely predominant in these books.

With that in mind, I'm ready to move on to the main questions:

E\ain & Azriel

Quickly, for this section, basically my entire focus is on why I don't believe these two will share a book, which - based on SJM's explanation of the second set of three ACOTAR books - means they're not endgame. If you're interested in an argument more about why these two aren't endgame based more on what's in the books about the characters, how they interact, etc. and doesn't focus on which books we'll get, you can see a very long post here that I made on that. On top of that, you did ask me this question "as a reader and writer", and I found that in answering "as a writer", it lended more toward talking about which book we'll get a bit more than which endgame relationships we'll get (even though they're basically synonymous lol).

I think they have an incredibly small chance of being endgame, personally. I hate making blatant, all out, 100% positive statements without the facts to back it up, and right now, we don't have that. Because we don't yet know who Az will be paired up with for his book. We do know he'll be getting something, as SJM has said she's excited to write his journey, and that is too big a statement for it to be a side journey.

So, we know Az will get a book. And we know that SJM is planning two more full novels for the series. There will be at least one novella, I believe, potentially two, but I'm not considering those. Based on what we've seen from Az, as a writer (as you requested 😉), I cannot see him being a novella story. Especially not after Sarah has talked about how excited she is for his journey.

The other reason I believe he'll be a full novel - the novels are for those who are hitting true rock bottom. Look at Feyre in ACOMAF, and look at Nesta in ACOSF. The main character for the novels will hit rock bottom, to then go through their character arc.

And Az is hitting it now. You can see it coming. He's moved on from pining for one female to pining for another, and while yes, he could technically get E\ain, there's a reason they're not together, and I firmly believe it goes beyond Lucien.

Lucien is the excuse. I know you asked about these from the perspective of a reader and writer, but just quickly - as someone who also is PHENOMENAL at preferring the emotionally unavailable, I know exactly what's going on with Az.

I'm not exaggerating here, for the record. I'm 29 and have never had a boyfriend because I CANNOT like the right guys. If you actually show interest in me, or are someone who could, I will not like you. I also won't like you if you're married or in a relationship, no, that's a turn off, but if you're emotionally unavailable in a way that means we will never be together - that's my jam.

Sound familiar? 👀

So, yeah, I know Az. And I know what he's doing with E\ain. Unlike me, he might go for something physical - that kiss attempt - but even in that he was thinking it would only be that one time. Because he knows she's not emotionally available. And NOT because of Lucien. Lucien, as I said, is the excuse. He's the "reason they can't be together" in Az's mind. He's "the obstacle to my happiness". But he really isn't.

E\ain said herself, in ACOFAS, she doesn't want a male. And we have reason to believe she wants to become human again. She isn't actually happy as a Fae, and she doesn't want to be with a Fae. And, friendly reminder, Az is Fae. 👀

So, Elain is emotionally unavailable. She may be physically available to Az, but I do not believe she is emotionally available to him - or any Fae - at the moment. I'll get more to that in the Lucien section, too.

Despite the lack of development around this information in ACOSF, and the fact that we can't know this for certain since we've never seen her POV or the POV of someone who truly knows E\ain - no, I don't believe either sisters truly do - this did not change in a year. I know E\ain's own personal turmoil and issues won't get solved on the side, off-page. Despite her lack of development so far, I do agree with those that ship E\ain and Az on one thing - she IS a main character. Or, at least, she will be. Hands down, 100%, of course. She's an Archeron. Sarah has said she'll have a book. It's all a fact.

So no way in hell did E\ain's emotional journey happen off-page. E\ain's journey is not solely going to be her training, or finding her value in Prythian in terms of what she'll do during the day and how she can help against a villainous threat. There will be an emotional journey. It's called a character arc. One of the character development resources I have bookmarked includes this diagram:

Source

This is a standard character arc. And while it may appear that it can all be stuff that happens to the character, which it can, take a look at the end point: character is forever changed.

That, in and of itself, implies that this arc goes beyond what is happening to the character, and expresses how all of those things happening are also working the character internally. More importantly, no one wants to read a book about a character who has no emotional journey, only a physical one. As a reader, I can attest to this. As a writer, I understand this and...am working on it in my own writing. 👀

Lastly, we KNOW SJM likes a good emotional arc. Feyre - hit rock bottom. Nesta - hit rock bottom. Bryce (CC) - hit rock bottom, and lived there for two years. Aelin (ToG) - she hit rock bottom on some levels, in different ways, multiple times. That girl went through some serious emotional shit, on top of all the stuff happening to her and around her.

My point - E\ain's book will include an emotional journey. And even if she's not at a full, devastating rock bottom, it will be something close to it. I have thoughts on what could cause it, what her bottom could be, but that's not for this post.

So, both E\ain and Azriel will have a book. And some believe it will be together. Allow me to explain why I believe all that I just said, as a writer, tells me it won't be:

Their journeys are too big for one book.

That's it. That's the main kicker. And it sounds stupid to some, I'm sure. So allow me to explain.

Azriel is so close to rock bottom, he's passed Bikini Bottom. He's taken the wrong bus home, and he's passed the final stop before he gets to Rock Bottom. And he's gonna be there until someone else comes along and blows up his hand glove to help him fly out of there. (If you don't get the reference, you're probably too young to be reading ACOTAR. 👀)

He's on his second girl he's pining after who is emotionally unavailable. A girl he doesn't actually want, but is just an idolized representation of what he wants. (This post, the Share Life with Me section explains my thoughts on that.) He's also struggling with a ton of other things. I won't list them all, cause this post as become a beast, but we know he's dealing with a lot.

In fact, that Az isn't able to sleep is a big sign of where he's at emotionally. I mean, he's an active male. And he's got a lot on his plate. He's busy, he trains, he is definitely physically tired regularly. But he can't sleep, because he has so much shit going on in his mind. All the stuff he's struggling with, not to mention his own feelings of inadequacy. You cannot convince me Az is not close to rock bottom.

E\ain, on the other hand, is nowhere near it. If she was, we would have been given an inkling. In ACOFAS, we got some Cassian chapters, clearly meant to help prepare us for ACOSF, and give us all some Nessian angst because we were all shipping them by then. BUT. More importantly than that, we got a little snippet into Nesta's mind too, when she got home after Solstice. It's the only time, other than Wings and Embers, where we got Nesta's POV before ACOSF. Both of which were meant to tell us a lot about her. Wings and Embers offered a lot of character development, and a look into something that happened to help explain a bit better Nesta and Cassian later in ACOMAF. (Also, I'm convinced Sarah just loves them and writing them, so couldn't help herself in writing that scene. lol)

The ACOFAS piece, on the other hand, was specifically designed to tell us where the hell Nesta is at emotionally. ACOFAS offers a bridge between ACOWAR and ACOSF. It gives us answers to tell us what's going on in their lives, so we don't show up a year later and are like "so, what's all this?" And the biggest answers it gave us was about Nesta, because the end of ACOWAR did not give us enough to tell us that's where she'd be at a year later.

So ACOFAS came in to tell us where everyone's at, and those Nesta POV pages gave us a look into Nesta, to see her without the lens of another person's perspective. And what did we see? Nesta, drowning at rock bottom.

As a writer, that is how I read the purpose of all that happened in ACOFAS, and why we got that snippet, as well as the purpose fo the Wings and Embers little chapter.

We have gotten nothing like that on E\ain. We have crumbs in ACOFAS that tell us she's not happy as a Fae and doesn't want to remain as such. And then in ACOSF we get a few quick looks at her through others' eyes, none of which tell us much. Maybe some minor foreshadowing, but nothing to tell us what is actually happening with her.

And then, basically the last thing we are given about E\ain in ACOSF is a comparative vignette on E\ain and Nesta in black for Solstice - which, yes, has a huge purpose. Everyone who says it doesn't is, I'm sorry, very wrong.

As a writer, I feel I can confirm, you would not include such a comparative vignette like that for no reason. I may not be published, and I do love a good description, but look at the way it's worded - it's not just about the physical descriptions, but the feeling you get in seeing those two women in black. What black does to them. If it meant nothing, no editor would keep it in. So much can be read in those words that I'm sure SJM and her editors expect us to think they mean something more. For them to then have no purpose, mean nothing, it would actually be incredibly misleading writing in a way authors don't do in their books. Yes, in interviews they may say thins to mislead readers. Yes, they may try to make their foreshadowing super subtle and hard to catch. But they're not going to blatantly, obviously foreshadow the opposite of what will happen. They're not going to spend a few paragraphs describing a character in a way that implies the Night Court drains the life from her, and then end with her finding her true home in the Night Court with a person that embodies night. Because those two things don't align.

But I digress.

The point is, that's very little with E\ain. If you read the scenes very carefully, yes, you'll pick up on certain pieces that I do think will be used later. But none of it tells us E\ain is close to rock bottom. If anything, it tells us E\ain is trying to pretend or prove she's not going to hit rock bottom - which, admittedly, a bit of a death sentence for you E\ain longer-term.

What I'm getting at here is that Az is ready for his story, E\ain is not.

Now, one good argument against this would be - well, only one person will likely be at rock bottom. You, yourself, Kasey, said that E\ain and Az's journeys are too big to be one book. Clearly you're assuming both will hit rock bottom. But, if E\ain doesn't, then their stories aren't too big.

Fair point, except this:

We know E\ain is getting a book.

A book that will be hers the way ACOSF was Nesta's. Obviously, I hope the next two books will provide more development for the love interest than my bby Cassian got. That being said, the books will have a protagonist, and a love interest who is also the silver medal protagonist for that book. Both will have journeys, absolutely, and their journeys will align.

And E\ain Archeron will NOT be the "love interest" in the book she's in. In fact, that's a HUGE argument people make against gwynriel. That these books are about the Archeron sisters, so the next book must be E\ain's. Their argument is that these stories are all about the Archeron sisters.

Okay, first of all, that's wrong. We know it's wrong, because we know there are two more books, and there's one more sister. So you cannot say that it's solely about the Archeron sisters.

However, they're right in one regard - the Archeron sisters are f*ing important. On so many levels. And while, at the moment, E\ain only has enough development to maybe be a love interest in the next book, she WILL NOT be that. E\ain will be the main protagonist. E\ain will be the Nesta, and her love interest will be the Cassian. You cannot convince me otherwise. Not with E\ain's Seeing powers, being Cauldron-born, and the journey/conflict Sarah has started setting up for her. It's not enough for its own book yet, but she's laid the groundwork to allow a build in the next book or novella, so that when we get E\ain's we'll have a better idea where she's starting from.

To say the next book is an E\ain/Azriel book means you are expecting Az's story to take second place, and that's not happening.

Az has had a POV chapter - yes, it was an exclusive, so not everyone could see it. But, if you wanted to, you can no problem. So, we have an idea of where Az is at - both in terms of actions we saw and what's going on in his mind.

We've seen that, and we know he's hitting rock bottom. Which means his love interest likely will not hit rock bottom. She will have a journey of her own, for sure. Some form of character arc that helps her be who she needs to be for Az, and for the plot of the book. So, even without Sarah telling us how excited she is to write Az's journey, we've been given enough to know that in Az's book, he'll likely have the gold medal protagonist slot.

More so than that, we have not seen E\ain's point of view at all. And while we haven't seen any character's point of view who is a possible love interest for Az, we do know that, at least for the main character, SJM seems to like to give us that first, while also testing the waters a bit.

Again, ACOFAS, a couple Cassian POV chapters plus the Nesta section of that one chapter. We actually got a smaller POV for the main protagonist, interestingly enough, but it made sense with the novella considering she was not spending time with everyone else. But we still got the snippet. However, that's just one book. So we need to go to a different series to talk more about SJM's preferences.

Let's think about Throne of Glass. Written entirely different - entirely third person, and every book was technical multi-POV. However, book 1 was heavily Celaena. We had minimal Dorian and Chaol POV sections until book 2. Similarly, in book 3 we got a very small amount of Rowan POV and Aedion POV, but then in book 4 they came in and shared a lot more page time. Why? Because, I believe, when she can SJM does like to test the waters a bit, try it out. Learn the voice without it being so crucial and central whenever possible. I could be wrong, but I don't think it's a coincidence that we saw that. That she gave us sneak peeks into the minds of people who, in later books, we'd see more fully. She would build to them being a main POV.

Of course, Manon and Elide were exceptions. And maybe Lorcan? I honestly can't remember if we got a Lorcan POV snippet in QoS, or if we just started to get Lorcan in EoS right away.

However, Manon and Elide were different. We couldn't just get a teaser snippet of Manon's POV in book 2. That would have spoiled a lot and had no place for flow. Same with Elide. Those two women came in and from day one as characters in the series they were too important, and too separate from others, to be a smaller POV in their first book.

So, to me, as a writer, SJM has shown a bit of a trend in giving us the POV of characters before the become true main characters with their own POV. I believe we will see E\ain's POV before she is the main character of her book. Which we haven't yet seen. So I can't believe her book is next.

Which, considering all the things I've said that explain why Az's book is, is another reason why I don't believe they'll be one book and are endgame.

E\ain and Lucien

Now, we know Lucien has his own story, journey. SJM has confirmed we will see him heal and grow.

Of course, if I'm right about how Az and E\ain won't be in a book together, and Az is the next book, then it sort of confirms that the sixth will be E\ain-Lucien. But I'll go into a couple other reasons why I believe there will be an E\lain-Lucien book.

First of all, let's ask the question - if I'm wrong, and the next book is E\ain-Az, then who's the sixth book about?

Some people say it's Lucien and Vassa - because we know we're going to get a deeper look into Lucien's journey. And, I would agree, if we have it confirmed that book 6 is Lucien's and E\ain has had her book, then yes...I suppose Vassa is the only option.

However, as a reader and writer, I can not see that happening. For one, I definitely got Vassa/Jurian vibes in ACOSF. I mean - banter. We know how SJM feels about the banter. Plus, they're both mortal, and Sarah doesn't really like to have endgame ships that can't actually be together their full lives. And I agree with what some others have said that I don't see her doing with Lucien what she did with Lorcan. She's used that already, and while Sarah can get repetitive with certain things, she likes to repeat herself in ways that can feel different.

So, as a reader who has learned a bit about SJM's general style, what she enjoys, etc., going beyond "signs" in the book, I can't see her doing Vassa and Lucien as endgame.

Beyond SJM's style and everything, though - we also have to remember what mates are in ACOTAR. They are different than Throne of Glass, just as the Fae in ACOTAR are different. These are not the same exact being types - Sarah adjusted them.

So, what do we know about mates - all from ACOWAR, ch. 24:

The male feels the bond stronger - "there will always be a...tug. For the females, it is usually easier to ignore, but the males...It can drive them mad."

Bonds are allowed to be rejected - "It has been illegal in our territory for a long, long time for males to [kill whoever their mate chooses to be with. Same with the other courts]. On the continent, there are territories that would believe the females literally belong to their mate."

Rejecting the bond is not a magical rejection - "It is their burden to fight through, but some believe they are entitled to the female. Even after the bond is rejected, they see her as belonging to them."

These are all such incredibly important points, especially when considering Lucien's future.

He feels the bond stronger - but Elain still feels it. There will always be a tug. She's just better at ignoring it, because as a female, it's easier. But he feels it, badly. I do believe Lucien is strong enough to not be driven mad, but that's how powerfully he is feeling it. We should remember that. Because if that's the case, do you really expect him to find comfort with another woman?

Bonds are allowed to be rejected...in Prythian. That's a MASSIVE caveat. This isn't like an "oh, you can undo this". No, in Prythian, their laws allow females to make a choice on who they will be with, mating bond or no. But other territories don't always allow that. Which helps lead into the next point even more:

Rejecting the bond is not a magical, official process that will release the male from the bond, in any sense. Now, the quote I pulled, Rhys is explicitly speaking about those who feel entitled to their female mate. HOWEVER, what it signifies is that, when a female rejects the bond, it is not some magical process that will suddenly lessen the tug or anything. And it sure as hell doesn't dissolve the mating bond. That bond is there, for life, and nothing can destroy it.

Sorry, but I'm going to trust Amren's understanding over everyone else's, considering she is literally thousands and thousands of years old.

So, even if E\ain rejects the bond. Which, like, if she wants to do that, go for it. I'm not saying she has to accept it, it's her life, her choice. However, that's not going to suddenly change anything for Lucien. A lot of people seem to think once she rejects it, Lucien will be more free. But no, that's not the case.

He will be just as bonded as he always was. Just as desirous for her. And, my guess, he'll be waiting to see if she'll ever change her mind, because we have no reason to believe the females can't do that.

Because of this, we can conclude Lucien is still entirely focused on E\ain, especially since she hasn't yet rejected the bond. So no, I can't believe Lucien and Vassa will be a thing. Based on the text, it sounds like it would take years - decades or centuries, even - for a male to be able to ignore the tug to his mate enough to enter into a meaningful relationship with someone else. And we don't have that kind of time in these books.

Taking out Vassa as an option, Lucien is left with E\ain. The same way E\ain is left with Lucien as I've now explained why I don't believe the next book is E\ain-Az. It's not exactly the best reason, and I'm sure Elucien shippers would hate it, but by process of elimination considering who we know we're getting journeys for, and what seems to make the most sense, E\ain and Lucien end up together.

However, I also think there's more to it than that.

As I've mentioned, I believe a piece of E\ain's journey is likely going to be her struggle with being Fae. She's not happy as a Fae, she wants her old life back. And I don't judge her for it - she had no choice in the matter, and that f*ing sucks. I do believe there will be more to her journey as well, but I believe that's going to be a big pice of her emotional arc.

Lucien has become, to E\ain, the main representation of everything she doesn't want - poor bby boi. Similar to how Nesta struggled with the idea of having an actual mate because it's such a Fae thing, and in claiming Cassian as hers she would be letting go of a final piece of her humanity, I think E\ain is also projecting a lot onto the mating bond. It's become the representation to her that she is no longer human, and is the reason she lost the things/people she loved. It's not - Grayson may have said that, but I think we all know he would have dumped her for being Fae regardless of if she had a mate or not.

So, if E\ain's arc is going to be about accepting herself as a Fae, then it makes perfect sense that Lucien would be an incredibly important piece of that story. Because, to be able to accept herself as she now is, she will have to stop blaming him and projecting her hatred of being Fae onto him. Az has no part in that journey, that arc. He, at best, could make her feel something good that might be nice for a little while. But she will not learn to love herself, to accept being Fae, by sleeping with Az.

Now, I'm sorry to say, nonnie, but that doesn't mean E\ain and Lucien are definitely endgame. Because SJM could do something where E\ain still chooses to reject the bond at the end of the journey.

That being said, I find it highly unlikely that will happen. Considering SJM said that each book will be about a "couple". It's not just "love interests". It'll be about a couple, meaning each book's couple will end up together - or, at least, most likely they will. Plus, we know that SJM enjoys her happily ever afters.

I do agree that the fact that Rhys mentioned females being able to reject the bond is a possible form of foreshadowing. HOWEVER - I actually find it very unlikely it would be about E\ain.

Why?

Because he and Feyre were talking about E\ain. SJM prefers her crumbs to be a bit more subtle than that - except maybe everything to do with Nesta and Cassian, but to be fair, neither of them are subtle either. XD

It would be such blatant foreshadowing for a conversation about E\ain's mating bond to lead to a new piece of information that females are allowed to reject the bond, to be a segment foreshadowing E\ain rejecting that specific bond.

Remember, foreshadowing is subtle hints to tell us what will happen in the future/later in the story. So, I do believe that conversation is more likely hinting at other possible mating bonds that have had rejections in the past.

I don't really believe that E\ain will reject the bond.

However, even if she does, my belief is that it would be early on in the book, maybe while she's still really in whatever dark space she'll be in. And then, for other reasons, or maybe just because she herself feels a bit more free, she ends up spending time with Lucien, and then throughout the book falls in love and at the end decides to accept the bond. Because I do believe a rejection is reversible, seeing as the bond can't be broken.

As a writer, that last scenario is actually what I would probably go for. However, this is SJM's world, and it's up to her what the different laws about everything is. I just believe a rejection is reversible because so far everything we're told about a mating bond rejection is that it's basically just a woman saying no. It doesn't magically affect the bond.

There are my thoughts on E\ain and Lucien, separating them from Az as much as I could, to explain why I believe they're likely going to be in a book together.

Admittedly, I don't have as many thoughts on them as endgame, because I will say that I haven't seen a lot of foreshadowing in the books yet to confirm that. Which is why I, again, focused more on why it makes sense that they would share a book.

Az and Gwyn

Disclaimer: I will also be referencing E\ain here. I did this on purpose, and kept certain arguments out of the E\ain-Az section because, when I talk about those two, I like to talk first and foremost about reasons why I think they're not right together or won't be in a book together without bringing in Gwyn. I believe there are a ton of signs that have nothing to do with Gwyn, and don't need her for comparison, to provide that case. Plus, I do think that if you bring Gwyn into the argument that goes against E\ain and Az, some then just say I'm biased toward Gwynriel and my reading his clouded by that.

You said, nonnie, by logic, you are about 85% certain Gwynriel are endgame. That's a decent percentage. However, I'll admit, I think I'm higher, probably closer to being between 95%-99%. Like I said, I can't be 100%. But, I'm great at deductive logical reasoning. And, if you've read the rest of this post, I believe I've already deduced that Az and Gwyn would been a book together, because like how E\ain has one other option besides Az, I think Az only has one other option besides E\ain.

He's had almost no interaction with Emerie, definitely nothing stated or seen. And we know Mor isn't an option because she and Az will never be together, since she can't be emotionally involved with men.

So, logically, I may have already convinced you that Az's book will be with Gwyn, which means they're endgame. Yes, like I said, SJM could do something where the female rejects the bond, and I could see that being an ending to the fifth book more than the sixth - but, since they're also mean to be stand alone books, to an extent, SJM is gonna want her happily ever after in all three of them. Also, more than that, I don't see SJM putting Az in a mating bond relationship where he gets rejected - he needs literally the exact opposite. A rejected bond would not put Az on the journey toward healing. It would give him a drill and he'd tunnel far beyond rock bottom to a place he'll never come back from. So, to me, no matter who it is that ends up being with Az in his book, I believe they are definitely endgame.

However, let me give a few more reasons why I think they're endgame:

1. Not a Crack Ship

Firstly, I just want to remind everyone that Gwynriel isn't a crack ship. If I'm getting technical about it, I could just say it's because they're actually in the same world - same books, even - so it's plausible because they literally know each other and can know each other. The term crack ship initially came about to talk about ships that go across fandoms. Azriel and Legolas, for example, would be a crack ship, because they are in different universes and literally could never, ever end up together.

However, more than that, I wrote a long post about why they're not a crack ship here.

In that post, I discuss the bonus POV chapter, the structure of that chapter, and what all of it most likely means, from the mind of a writer. A quick recap:

The chapter is a comparison. It is half and half Azriel's focus on E\ain and Gwyn. Beyond that, you also get a moment between Az and each girl, and then a moment between Az and another who knows what's happening (Rhys knowing about him almost kissing E\ain, Clotho knowing about him giving Gwyn the necklace) - and that those conversations provide us reflections in Az's mind that are TELLING.

Basically, the two sections mirror each other. The only reason to write a chapter like this, in this way, is to provide a comparison. The only reason to provide a comparison, UNLESS we're actually getting confirmed endgame information (i.e. say it was a true love triangle, and Az was speaking with each girl separately to tell them his decision), would be to show us that these two females have something worth comparing. In this case, it's likely their relationship with Az, in particular their effects on him and his thoughts about them, and how it all makes him feel.

We see Az get shy about his hands around E\ain, but not Gwyn. We see his shadows skitter back from E\ain's breath, but they leap out and dance with Gwyn's. We see Az think of E\ain only in the physical sense - he wants to have sex with her, but that's all we see - vs. we see Az picture Gwyn's smile at opening the gift, and he tucks it away in his heart.

These are specific comparisons, mirrors. And I didn't bring up too many details on what happened in that post, because that post wasn't meant to go into which one is endgame. But here, I can bring those up, and express that in the mirroring chapter sections, in the comparison we were given, I believe the signs point to Gwynriel.

2. Foreshadowing

I spent a lot of time talking about foreshadowing at the beginning of this post, for a reason. And while it was relevant in the other two sections, I was saving a lot for this one because this relationship has received an insane amount of foreshadowing in the shortest amount of time.

And, a vast majority of it was definitely in the bonus POV chapter. If you have not read the chapter yet, I do encourage you to look for it. It's not difficult to find it online, but make sure you get one that has both the E\ain and Gwyn section, because without the Gwyn section you don't get much of the foreshadowing.

The bonus chapter, as I mentioned, really did provide a comparison of E\ain and Gwyn. And yes, you come out of it knowing Az wants to have sex with E\ain, and he's not thinking that about Gwyn. It seems damning, except for a very important factor:

Sex isn't all Az wants.

He wants a relationship like his brothers have. That means more than sex. And yet, all we see from Az with E\ain is physical thoughts about her, or later on an argument that she should have been given to him, since her sisters were given to his brothers. Bad argument, horribly misogynistic, and none of his other points had anything to do with his actual feelings for her. She has just become a representation of what he wants, and it's blinding him.

You do see some foreshadowing in the E\ain section, much of which I do believe is hinting that they are not endgame. The biggest one is when she breaths sharply and his shadows "skitter back". That's a subtle hint that tells us his shadows reaction to E\ain.

Others might argue that it was one time, but we have seen his shadows retreat around E\ain before. We just didn't fully understand how bad it was. However, the other truth is, we can't be sure back then it was "bad". Because SJM did it with Mor too, even when Az and Mor were, I believe, endgame in her mind. It's possible SJM had remained undecided on E\ain and Az until ACOFAS, maybe even ACOSF. For all we know, SJM got Gwyn and Az on a page together, and it was like Nessian all over again. And this chapter is meant to represent that and show us how certain things that we clearly didn't always interpret to be bad (and maybe she even hadn't and just got lucky with) are, in fact, a bad sign.

My point, let's not think too hard on Az's shadows in ACOMAF and ACOWAR, because we know that these books didn't start getting planned until they were working on ACOWAR, maybe even already promoting it and done writing (?). And authors can change their minds. We writers try to stay as consistent as possible, but sometimes you just don't know every single thing that's going to happen, and new information is going to come in, and you just have to make sure it doesn't actually conflict with what you've already provided.

In this case, the idea of Az's shadows knowing who is right for him, and skittering back from those who aren't, would actually be consistent and fitting, and SJM likely needed us to understand that Az's shadows retreating aren't good.

But how did we learn that?

Well, beyond the use of "skittered back", which definitely has a more negative connotation, we get more when we see Gwyn later in the chapter.

Azriel ends up in the training ring, and there Gwyn is. Surprise! Cause his shadows didn't warn him, so now he's stuck and has to at least greet her.

While talking, at one point Gwyn's breath exhales visibly, and you get a description of Azriel's shadows "darting out to dance with it before twirling back" to Az.

That's a very new interaction with shadows, one we've never seen before. We've already seen the shadows retreating with Mor, who we know is wrong for Az but whom he pined after. Now we see them retreating again - skittering back, even - with E\ain. Another one he is pining after, though pining might be a strong word here.

We clearly know that the two reactions mean two different things. By my own logic, I would already assume that we're being told E\ain, like Mor, is not endgame for Az. And that Gwyn, who receives such a different interaction, is. However, if you're not sold, there's another part of the conversation that I believe is an important clue.

Gwyn asks Az about his being called a "Shadowsinger", if it means he sings. This, obviously, amuses Az, but his explanation is:

"I am a shadowsinger--it's not a title that someone just made."

I AM a shadowsinger. It's who Az is. It's a part of him. For Az to accept himself fully, he has to accept this about himself as well. I'm not saying he hasn't, it's just a general notion.

The shadows aren't bad, they are a part of Az, of who he is. E\ain and Mor aren't chasing nasty shadows away to let us see Az better. They're scaring away a crucial piece of who Az is, so that they'll never fully know him. You can't know and truly see Az without his shadows.

Basically, E\ain and Mor both have Az hiding a part of who he is, but around Gwyn he is himself fully, his shadows on full view. And he's comfortable - he's not worrying about it during the chapter. No, instead, he finds "something restless settling in him. Even his shadows had calmed."

These hints, in all honesty, don't feel super subtle. I'm not going to lie. However, they clearly must be a bit subtle, since not everyone is catching them or reading them the same way.

And that's fine. We all read things differently, interpret them differently. However, as a writer, and one who has read basically all of SJM's books, I do feel like I have a really good idea of her style and how to interpret what she does. It doesn't mean she can't or won't surprise me in the future, but in this, I do think my interpretation is right. Because I understand the importance of a comparison.

I believe she used the comparison as a form of foreshadowing. In fact, I believe she's done it a few times with comparisons, and that the bonus POV chapter was just the longest, most continuous comparison for foreshadowing we've seen.

3a. Banter!

I can't not bring this up. But it should be quick.

SJM has stated, out right, one of the endgame signs for her, or a sign that a couple should maybe be considered to be endgame, is banter. That is incredibly important to her. Yes, she likes wings and tattoos - but that's just what you need for the main male. But ALL her couples have some form of banter, and they're all different to suit them.

Aelin just drives Rowan nuts with innuendos and outright statements and little negliges. Manon and Dorian have that taunting type of banter going. Rhys and Feyre have a super flirty style. Nesta and Cassian just egg each other on and use sharp words that would make most people cry, but instead just makes them both hard. Even Aedion and Lysandra had their own style of banter. We didn't see as much spoken banter but, I'm sorry, Lysandra using her different animal forms to bother Aedion as they made their way to Terrasen, or her tackling him when in ghost leopard form, those are just a more physical style of banter and you cannot convince me otherwise.

It's a thing. E\ain and Az don't have banter. Sure, they talk to each other...sort of...once a year. But they don't banter.

Gwyn and Az have more of a banter-type relationship. We haven't seen too much of it yet, but just the taunting each other about the obstacle course - Az being all "no prize cause you won't do it" and Gwyn needing to prove him wrong - is a form of banter. Again, it may not be spoken, but if you broaden the concept, it is banter - a competitive banter.

3b. Relationship Trait

Similarly, all of her endgame ships have at least some trait that makes each relationship unique. It's often aligned to the banter, but it's there.

Again, with Feyre and Rhys they're just stupid flirty in an obvious way, except they do it mind to mind. Cassian and Nesta are more unique, again, in how they somehow manage to build each other up while sounding like they're tearing each other down. 👀 Elide and Lorcan have the "we're the last thing you'd expect" thing going for them - considering the insane height difference, and yet Lorcan is definitely more afraid of Elide.

Basically, there's something there that makes them unique. But, with Az and E\ain, there really isn't much other than "aw, the two prettiest got together". But that's not a trait for a relationship, just as being pretty is not exactly a personality trait - it's something that might affect your personality traits, for sure. But a person's face doesn't automatically mean any type of personality trait. But nothing would really set them apart, give them a unique aspect to their relationship and how they connect to each other.

Gwyn and Az, on the other hand, would be that ridiculously competitive couple. They'd likely connect and relate to each other through games and competitions. They'd probably use dares and challenges to push the other to be better, to go outside of their comfort zone, etc. I mean, I'm about 95% certain that the first time Gwyn flies with Az - assuming it's in a lighthearted scenario and Gwyn has had a certain amount of healing already - Az will literally be like, "You scared, Berdara?" and that's how he'll get her in the air, cause Mother-forbid she give in to that.

4. Nicknames

So, this isn't one that SJM has mentioned, but as a reader and writer I couldn't help but notice she does this for alllll her biggest ships. And typically, it's a slightly more taunting nickname, at least at first.

Rhys - Feyre darling. It's a term of endearment now, but it started out with a teasing tone.

Cassian - Nes. Yes, I'm also upset we lost sweetheart, but I think I know why - after ACOFAS SJM wrote Crescent City, and decided to give Hunt "sweetheart" for Bryce, and she doesn't like to repeat nicknames. But he also has "Nes", which also is more taunting, especially as she tells him not to call her that.

Hunt - Sweetheart. As mentioned earlier. And this most definitely started out in a taunting manner.

Aelin - Buzzard. Obvs, Aelin plays with the boys on this one. Rowan's nickname for Aelin has always been a term of endearment and soft, but "Buzzard" started off in a bit more of a taunt. It's also soft, but considering it's a reference to his hawk form and how he fusses, there's a taunting tone to it.

It's a big trend in her books that's definitely noticed, but I haven't seen it discussed as much.

And this is, to me, one of the clinchers. It is, arguably, a form of foreshadowing, but it deserved its own section.

Gwyn threw Azriel a withering stare as she strode past him. "See you tomorrow, Shadowsinger," she tossed over a shoulder.

This is really huge. He may be a shadowsinger, but people don't call him this.

At least, for ht most part. I can't remember if others ever call him just "Shadowsinger". If any do, it was definitely disgruntled Illyrians or something of that ilk, and it was meant derogatorily. Which means Gwyn is actually reclaiming that name for him, and even though it's used in a taunting way, Azriel knows it's not in a judgmental way. It's just an "I now know this is you" way.

In fact, by using that name in the way she does, it's a form of acceptance of who he is. And a reminder. Remember, he told her "I AM a shadowsinger - it's not a title..."

And here Gwyn is, turning it into a title, likely a direct reference to that conversation. And reminding him, this is who you are. I see that, I know that, and I am not afraid. I mean, she is taunting him, not to anger him or make him feel small. It's a taunt to say "Game on, I'm in, you won this round but I'll prevail" sort of thing. (Remember, competitive.)

As a writer, seeing Gwyn call Az a nickname, having noticed this trend in SJM's works, feels like a huge sign that they are endgame. Thinking about the meaning behind her using that term as the nickname does the same, because in doing so she's telling him the thing he's always wanted to hear from others - "I am not afraid".

Summary

Well, there you have it, nonnie. My own logic and facts - maybe not literally presented as perfect screenshots always, but I was doing a lot of writing - to explain my own personal opinion.

This is my own opinion, and I will not state that this is 100% a fact of what will happen, as only SJM knows what's to come completely. However, I did appreciate the question, because as someone who loves writing and does do a lot of writing, I do feel like I sometimes see things a bit differently, or look at them with a different eye - at least after the first read through.

That being said, there are other people on here that provide absolutely amazing analyses of stuff like this. Many better than mine, and far more succinct. Though, this was a big question to ask me to hit all three ships at once. lol

TL;DR

E\ain and Az are essentially both too big of characters to share a book, as they will both have big, emotional journeys to go on. The only way to get them both in a book is if one doesn't hit rock bottom, but we know Az is going to do just that and is on his way there. That would mean E\ain would be the one to not hit rock bottom, which would also mean she's not the main protagonist of the story, because that would be Az. That's not happening, E\ain will be the main protagonist of her book. But, as a writer, that rock bottom trend is obvious, and you can't have two people at their true rock bottoms as the main protagonists, because they'll never be able to pull themselves up. The love interest will have their own journey, but they'll also be the ones that are guiding the main protagonist out of the dark, as Cassian did with Nesta.

E\ain and Lucien are, kind of, logically deduced to have a book together. However, if I'm right that E\ain's journey will include her needing to accept now being Fae, and that she has been using Lucien and their mating bond as a representation of all things Fae that have ruined her life, then it would make perfect sense that Lucien would be the one to help her along her journey to acceptance. Because she will need to first stop putting it all on him.

Gwyn and Az have a lot of foreshadowing, and the main one I focused on was her shadows. It's not a new argument, but it is important to remember that comparisons can be used a multitude of ways and done differently. It's not always a blatantly obvious "well, girl a is like this and girl b is like this". It can be done throughout a whole chapter, in how you structure it. It can be done in a vignette. But what's important is to recognize the comparisons, and then analyze for foreshadowing, cause those are often a spot you'll find a wealth of it laying around. And the Az POV bonus chapter was just that - a chapter structured in a specific way to mirror the two sections and provide a comparison of the two females, and use it as a form of foreshadowing. They also hit a few important SJM endgame bingo spaces. In particular the banter, the fact that they have a trait unique to their relationship - even now, when they're just starting to be friends - and also Gwyn's nickname for him that has started out as a form of teasing, as all of the main character relationships have had in SJM's novels.

As always, these are my opinions. I have based them on my own experience in writing, as well as on my own interpretations of what I've read in ACOTAR and other SJM books to help me understand her as an author. I promise to respect your own opinions, all I ask is that you also respect mine. I have tagged this carefully, because I know not everyone wants to see this content, but if you do, please I just ask that you're respectful about it. And to read the full thing before coming back to me about it.

Many of these opinions are shared by other tumblr users, absolutely. As are the interpretations and analyses. So most likely they won't all seem new, but this is my own work. I typed it up entirely on my own over the last six or so hours - while procrastinating stuff I actually really need to do.... - without referencing others posts. If anything feels similar, I apologize for that, it's likely because you and I share the same opinions and interpretations.

#acotar #acotar thoughts #acotar theory #ask box #antielriel #anti elriel #gwynriel #elucien #gwyn #azriel #lucien #elain archeron

183 notes · View notes

joannasteez · 3 years

Note

Headcanon request:

The guys going shopping with their girl while she is trying on more and more hideous clothing trying to make her man crack and say “what the fuck are you wearing?”

Not sure whose included when you say “guys” so I just did the Reyes boys since I only really write for them at the moment! Also, comedy isn’t my strong suit so hopefully this isn’t completely cringe LOL, if it is forgive me! Haha

𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋 𝐑𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒

Shopping is no simple endeavor, never has been, never will be. There are far too many components to just offhandedly consider the process easy. Color scheme, sizes, fabrics, the cut of the clothing, the energy of the store, the weather outside, all these factors and many more play integral roles in making or breaking your shopping experience.

But you never considered Angel to be such an influential factor, but he was, and his far off nonchalant mood was putting a damper on your shopping.

He’d been occupied by the bright screen of his phone, scrolling and tapping away vigorously, texting EZ or Coco or Gilly no doubt, or hell maybe all three at once, which was no problem any other day, but considering you wanted his insight on the things you’d picked from the lined up racks, it was becoming a tiny bit of an issue.

Every other thing you showed him he barely looked at, giving you a short nod or a thumbs up, and these outfits were GOOD mind you. Like dinner date, catching the eye of every other person around you good, baby making till 4 AM good, and he was giving you these half assed responses.

“I’ll fix you”, you thought. Grabbing a bunch of random pieces and leading him to the fitting room.

The first couple of outfits you put together aren’t horrible but they aren’t amazing either, but that’s purposeful because you want to see how much he’ll notice. And you’re actually surprised, because he does notice, the upturn in his brow telling you he isn’t that into the outfit. “Yes? No?”, you ask.

“Try something else”, he mumbles before tapping away again at his phone.

You try again. Coming out the fitting room. “What about this?”.

He looks you up and down, taking the time to look over the fit of the clothes and the colors before he speaks. “The bottoms don’t go with that top”.

You try once again, a smile giggle emitting as you throw together the craziest, most random things. ‘Time to up the ante’, you think, as you move from out the door, clearing your voice to catch his attention.

He double takes when he sees you, and it takes a lot not to burst into a fit of giggles. “You being serious? You look like a Y2K red carpet”, he scrutinizes and you tilt your head not sure of what he’s getting at, so he clarifies as he texts away on his phone. “That’s not a compliment baby”.

You roll your eyes, making quick work of changing the top of the outfit. “Ok is it better now?” You hands smoothening over the top.

He sits his phone down, brows coming together in deep thought. “You know that word people use to like describe stuff that’s unpleasant? Stuff that’s uneasy on the eyes?”

You think for a minute..... words unsure as they leave you. “Ugly?”

“Exactly”.

“Ass”, you gripe lightly. Throwing a nearby shirt his way before you make your way back to the fitting room. His voice carrying over toward you as you close the door. “Don’t even hang that top back up on the rack, just toss that shit in the trash”.

“Excuse me J. Alexander”, you mock.

He’s confused at your reference. “What?”

“Nothing”, you say, piecing another outfit together another outfit, more ridiculous than the others. “I have one more outfit, it’s good this time I promise”.

“I’m at the edge of my seat”, he deadpans.

You come out and it takes a moment for him to respond, eyes stuck on the jarring contrast of color and patterns. He rushes to you, holding your face as his thumbs pull at the skin just below your eyes to get a better view of them, expression dramatically worried.

“Are you color blind?”

You swat him away. “No Angel, what are you talking about”.

“You must be because what the fuck are you wearing?”

𝐄𝐙𝐄𝐊𝐈𝐄𝐋 𝐑𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒

Ezekiel’s a bit different from Angel when it comes to your shopping experience, and so despite his lack of knowledge or interest even in the complex goings on of such an endeavor, he realizes that it makes you extremely excited. He gives as much attention as he can muster, which is pretty hard sometimes, especially when it’s been a long day and his feet are hurting or if his muscles are sore. But there’s still a bit of an issue when it comes to him, a tiny issue you come to realize as you walk through racks of clothes.

No matter what you show him, even if it’s not particularly your style, he gives his approval.

And it’s kind of sweet and endearing, because he doesn’t want to dampen your mood by expressing how he doesn’t like a particular color or pattern on some dress or shirt or another, but honest opinions are crucial to the shopping experience. He’s hindering more than helping and he doesn’t even realize it, so now you’ve got to fix the situation a bit. Nudge him a little into the right direction.

So you pick up a couple of ok outfits, some not so great outfits and a few that are just completely awful. Even looking at them as you lead him to the fitting room you’re wondering why they’re even in the store.

You change into the first outfit, coming from behind the fitting room door to show him, and his head tilts. Eyes taking you in but he’s unsure of how to express what he’s thinking. “It’s...... nice”.

“Nice?”, you ask before looking down at your self. And again, it’s not awful, the cut of the top and the bottoms go together pretty well, but the colors are just off. “That’s it?........ nothing else?”

“It’s cool. If you like it, I like it”.

“Forget what I like, I want honesty”.

You’re changing again, into something a little more ridiculous, lips turning a bit at this little game you’ve been playing to see how long it’s take till he cracked and gave you some truth.

You come out again. Twirling to give him a 360 view. “Yes? No? Be honest”.

His face is scrunched, brows pulling in dislike. “It’s alright......... would look a lot better if you left it on the rack”.

You gasp, tone of the comment taking you back a bit and he throws his hands up in defense. “What? You said be honest”.

You try again, upping the ridiculousness with some janky looking braided belt and it’s taking more and more not to laugh at how good you’re putting these bad outfits together. “Ok ok..... this is better I think. Thoughts?”

He gives a once over fairly quickly. “Are we still doing the honesty thing?”

“Yes!”

“You’d look better in a burlap sack”.

There’s a near by piece of some cotton shirt that lays idle, you throw it his way. “Harsh......”, your hands slipping off the ugly belt. “And for the record, I could pull off a burlap sack if I wanted to”.

He nods. “Exactly my point. Anything is better than this”.

You’re turned now, slipping of the belt and walking back to the fitting room. “Who knew Mr. I Only Wear Plaid and Sleep in my Jeans was such a critic”.

“At least I match”, he shot back. Readying himself for the next outfit.

You’ve completely thrown caution to the wind, mixing patterns and completely destroying any sense you have of color theory. Patterns clash and the contrast of the color is just despicable at this point. A four year old could do better than what you have on, you’re sure of it.

You step from the fitting room, giving a strut and face that just might make Naomi Campbell proud. And honestly you were kinda selling it..... till Ezekiel really took a good look at you. His features dropping.

“Ok babe forreal, what the fuck are you wearing?”

Taglist: @appropriate-writers-name @est1887 @xladymacbethx @blessedboo @brownsugarcoffy @elektriknachosss @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @superhoeva @witching-hour @noz4a2 @withmyteeth

#headcanon #long headcanon #ez reyes #angel reyes #mayans mc #ez reyes x reader #angel reyes x reader #joannasteez

151 notes · View notes

renegadeontherunn · 3 years

Note

hi fiona!! can't wait to see all the prompts you'll write! how about 21 for rex and ahsoka?

!!! kt!!! thank you so much for the ask!!! asjkdlkas someone tell me how to write less please AKJSDSAKK

21. "Why are you always so reckless, huh? Do you ever think about what would happen if something happened to you?" // from these prompts! // read it on ao3!

They limped—or at least, Ahsoka limped—up through the forest and eventually emerged at the edge of the hill where peach-orange grass gave way to a navy cliffside. There was a jagged path carved out, wide enough for them to get across in 2, maybe 3 lines. She could make out dark blotches a few miles away—Anakin’s ships. So they had been able to land. That made one of them.

“We should go around,” Rex’s gruff voice said as he came up behind her. Ahsoka looked over her shoulder at him. He eyed the dropoff warily. “There are rockslides this time of year and I don’t trust this cliff.”

Ahsoka turned back, head craning up to examine it. “That’ll take too long.” She nodded toward the other ships in the distance. “Anakin needs our help and this is the fastest way to the landing zone.” She stepped onto the path, one hand on the cliffside to steady herself.

Rex moved forward. “Commander—”

“It’s fine, Rex. We have to help Anakin.” She tried to ignore the scorching pain shooting up her leg. Her shoulders moved with a breath. “Trust me on this one.”

She was stopped by a warm hand on her arm. “It’s not safe. Especially with our wounded.” Ahsoka could feel his eyes on her leg. “We can’t help General Skywalker if we’re dead.”

“Rex—”

“All due respect, Commander, trust me on this one.”

Ahsoka gritted her teeth, shifting once again to face him. Her mind briefly raced through alternatives, outcomes, a headcount, and with one more twinge in her ankle, she sighed and relented. “You’re right.”

Rex gave her a nod and turned to direct the troops back around.

Her eyes found the horizon once more and Anakin’s ships that rested there. She had a bad feeling about this battle. Something was going to go—

“Commander?” came Rex’s voice at her shoulder. Ahsoka didn’t look at him, instead closing her eyes, brow furrowed as she listened, as she felt. The ground shook lightly under her feet, the faint screech of metal against metal, metal against stone. “What is it?”

Ahsoka came up from beneath the waves of the Force, eyes opening as she unhooked her lightsabers. “We’ve got company.” As soon as the words left her mouth, a battalion of black-plated droids materialized around the curve of the cliff. They stopped in what seemed like surprise, and there was a shout from Rex. Her side shot first, quick as they’ve always been, and in a breath, Ahsoka was deflecting bolts from every direction.

It was a pretty typical battle, as far as strategy goes, and Ahsoka found herself getting lost as the droids approached and withdrew in turn, her spinning lightsabers loops of light in clouding dust.

Rex appeared at her side. “What’s the plan?”

“You said there are rockslides here?” She sliced through another two droids.

He stopped shooting, incredulous gaze boring into her even through his helmet. “No.”

Ahsoka twisted in front of him, habitually falling back into their familiar sword-and-shield technique. Rex’s pistols were in the air once more, his aim deadly even as he kept his focus on their conversation.

“We wanted to go around anyway. Why not block them here?”

A shot skimmed off Rex’s shoulder. “You’re not serious. That’ll get us all killed.”

“No, it won’t,” Ahsoka insisted. “Just get all the men off the path and onto the hill. I’ll bring the cliff down in front of us.”

She risked a glance behind her and, seeing that everyone was off the cliffside already, Ahsoka pushed Rex back. She steadied herself in the Force and pulled.

The ground rumbled, there was the sound of crunching metal, and then Rex’s hand was on her arm, trying to tug her away. There was a shrill gasp in the Force and Ahsoka saw a massive column of rock headed straight for them.

“Rex!” she shouted, throwing herself into him and sending him to the ground a few feet away. She scrambled forward, and the rock collided with the spot where they had just been standing.

But Ahsoka hadn’t moved far enough.

The column had completely smashed through the path and the rest was crumbling away. She tried to run, but her broken ankle clipped the edge, her stomach dropped, and then she was falling.

She blindly reached out, scrabbling for purchase on the cliff, but gravity’s grip was not so easily curbed.

“Ahsoka!”

Rex was leaning over the side, hand out; Ahsoka’s hand brushed his, fingers slipping past each other, just too far to reach, and she plummeted. Wind rushed past, rocks cascading down alongside her. She saw Rex’s well-worn helmet grow smaller and smaller, and then something slammed into her and the world cut to black.

Someone was screaming. There was a ringing cutting through Ahsoka’s brain and everything was muffled as she blinked squinting eyes open, but she knew she could hear screaming. It got louder as she tried to move her legs—tried, because she couldn’t even feel her legs, couldn’t feel anything but searing, scalding pain up her spine, down every nerve—and when she gasped in a breath of dust, the screaming paused and turned to coughing. Ahsoka’s chest shuddered, her throat scraped so raw she thought she might vomit.

Then she opened her eyes fully, saw the blood pooling beneath herself, and did vomit. Pounding head, pounding heart, Ahsoka weakly tilted her gaze up. Far above her was blurred movement, a wave of white dotted with blue swirled down and around and back up again. Her neck ached so much it tingled, turning numb. Her wrist vibrated and beeped.

Wait, that wasn’t right. Wrists don’t normally do that. She slowly moved her arm up onto her stomach, saw the faint blink of green that was, she realized after a few stuttering breaths, her comm. Another second in agony and she clicked the call through, surprised it was still working at all.

“Ahsoka!”

Rex.

It was Rex. Some of the fear swelling in her throat eased at the confirmation of his presence. Rex was there. He’d know what to do.

“Ahsoka? Can you hear me?”

She licked cracking lips. “Yeah.” She hoped her broken voice would carry. Wondered if her broken body would need to be carried too. “Yeah, I’m here.”

A sigh of relief made static on the other side. “Are you alright?”

Ahsoka took stock of herself. Broken leg, obviously, maybe both. A concussion if the pain-filled sleep tugging at her was any indication. And she was pinned—half her body nearly crushed under the immense pieces of cliffside that’d fallen with her. Jagged stone cut into her shoulder.

“Ahsoka?”

She hesitated. “I could use some help.”

A muffled swear, a shouted order, the sound of a hundred quick, urgent footfalls. His voice was tight when he spoke again. “We’re coming to you now. Can you walk?”

Ahsoka shook her head before she realized that was a bad idea—her vision whited out at the corners—and that he couldn’t even see her anyway. “No.” Her head swam. When had it gotten so cold outside? “I’m pinned. I think my leg’s broken.”

“What about the Force?”

Oh. Ahsoka had forgotten about that. But when she dipped into its familiar depths, sleep, the dangerous kind, pulled at her—down, down, down—until Ahsoka gasped and ripped herself away. Adrenaline hammered her heart. “No. Don’t wanna risk it.”

Rex didn’t bother asking for further information. The footsteps got faster.

“Are you okay?” Ahsoka asked softly.

“Yes, sir,” came the rough reply.

She nodded, forgetting again that he couldn’t see. “Good.”

“Good?”

Ahsoka blinked. “Yeah. That’s kind of what I was going for.” Her chest tightened, ribs shifting; she should probably stop talking.

“You can’t just—” Static crackled over the comm. They must’ve hit a deadzone.

Ahsoka drifted her eyes along the crimson sky, sinking in and out of unconsciousness as she waited.

“—mander? Commander?”

“Here,” she said belatedly, her brain coming back to the surface. “‘m here. ‘m fine.” Trees rustled in the wind. Ahsoka thought she could hear them coming, not just over the comm, but actually hear them, in the distance. She suddenly remembered where she was. “Gonna try to get out.”

Rex’s voice bit through the air immediately. “No, don’t. You’ll hurt yourself more. Just stay awake.”

She shifted, readying herself to try pulling her leg out. “’s fine, I got it.”

“Commander, stay exactly where you are.” His voice was clipped. “Don’t try to move.”

Ahsoka groaned, lightning zipping up her leg. “I got it.” She was starting to sweat, despite the cold. It had been cold, right?

“Ahsoka, stop!”

And she did, blinking in shock.

Rex’s tinny voice continued, wired anger cutting through the comm. “Why are you always so reckless? Do you ever even think about what would happen if something—” Ahsoka couldn’t tell if he’d cut himself off or if they’d hit another deadzone, but either way her head throbbed with pain and guilt.

“Sorry,” she mumbled back. She was completely spent of energy, spent of strength, and her body ached with agony.

“—and on the cliff—” Rex’s voice suddenly cut back in.

“Wasn’t trying to be reckless,” she interrupted, voice breathy. There was a crucial piece of information he was leaving out. “Trying to save your life.” Ahsoka dropped her head onto her arm.

There was the sound of shuffling, static rocks shifting beneath far-away feet. “What about saving your own life?” Past the haze slowly encroaching on the world, Ahsoka wondered why he was so angry with her. She didn’t think she’d ever heard him so emphatic. He’d scolded her plenty of times—follow orders this, don’t run off looking for trouble that—Ahsoka should’ve been used to it. But still.

Cynicism seeped out of her exhausted mind. “Can’t save everyone.” It was something Anakin had told her, back when she’d first become a Padawan, back when she was determined to get everyone out of this alive. When she’d thought that was even an option.

“You can try.”

There was a pause, and in it, Ahsoka breathed, her eyes slipping closed.

“Ahsoka!”

Rex was shaking her shoulders, his face, bare of its helmet, twisted in worry above hers. Ahsoka’s heart shuddered, stumbled, like it’d just remembered that it had to beat. Her hand instinctively clutched his arm.

“You’re alright.” People were moving, pushing the rock off her, and Rex’s voice broke through the onslaught of pain. “We got you.” His hand was on her shoulder. “I got you.”

29 notes · View notes

drawlfoy · 3 years

Text

Wonders of Ohio P.8

masterlist (read parts 1-7 here!) request guidelines

pairing: draco x reader

request: no ma’am this was spawned in the pits of my hell brain

summary: y/n’s family takes on a particularly mysterious exchange student, draco malfoy. fyi: this is NOT a non magic AU--draco is still a wizard

warnings: swearing, college admissions (ew), vague mentions of a car accident

a/n: hey...ahahahaha yeah so when i disappeared from the writing scene i was actually sitting on this chapter because i wanted to finish the entire scene up until draco came back home, but i haven’t quite figured out how everything is going to work in the middle of this story bc we’re getting into the thick of it. things are only going to get more and more wild and while i have the ending already written (oopsies), there’s still a lot to cover between december and august. i promise you it’ll be worth it tho--thanks so much for waiting!

word count: 2.5k

no music recs because i wrote this in november and i don’t remember ANYTHING!

tags tags tags (message me if you’d like to be tagged!) @icintliviinyiniilsiji @erisdogwood @loveissupernatural @gruffle1 @missmulti @cleopatera @hahaboop @accio-rogers @geeksareunique @eltanin-malfoy @war-sword @cams-lynn @itsivyberry @ayo-cowbelly @nerd-domland @yesnerdsblog @shizarianathania @evanstanfanatic @strawberriesonsummer @hariosborn @night-ving @straightzoinked @imintoodeeptostop @naiomimoonshard @jejegu @ophelia-enthusiast @alwaysbeanunknownfan

Y/N froze as she heard someone clear their throat behind her.

In any other situation, she would have fibbed, the lies rolling off her tongue and falling into a neat pile.

But this wasn’t just any situation.

“Drac--uh, Draco,” she began, rather lamely. She wondered if he could see what she had been doing and then immediately stopped that train of thought--of course he could, she was sitting there crouched with his letters all over the floor next to her.

Y/N had never seen him look so terrible--his eyes were saucers and his fists were clenching and unclenching at his sides.

“What’s up?” she asked. Maybe I got really lucky and he hasn’t noticed yet.

His mouth opened and closed a few times as he seemed to agonize over what to say.

“Give me those letters back,” he finally said. “And come into my room. We need to talk.”

She scrambled to get everything back into the satchel--honestly, how had all those fit into such a tiny bag?--and tossed it into his hand. He refused to make eye contact and instead yanked her into his room, shutting the door before closing the blinds.

“Uh...what’s going o--”

“Don’t play dumb,” he snapped. “You know what you read.”

She withered under his gaze, all of a sudden trained on her with a heat that could melt through iron.

“Here’s how this is going to go,” he said tying up the satchel and tossing it into a drawer. “You’re going to sit right there and tell me everything that you know. And no lying. I can always tell.”

Something about the weight of his words told her that the last part wasn’t hyperbole. “O--okay. Um, I know that you’re kind of strange, and I know that your family definitely isn’t into politics because unless you’ve changed your name I haven’t been able to find shit on your family...I know that you’re here for some kind of punishment, or at least that’s what the letter said, and that wherever you’re from believes in, uh, magic, or something…”

Y/N had never been so scared of Draco as she was right then. He stood looming over her, his eyes calculating and cold. “You’re telling the truth.”

“Uh--how did you--”

“Is there anything else you want to know? Ask now or forever hold your peace. I promise I’ll take care of this.”

Y/N blinked. “What? What do you mean take care…”

“Don’t...just don’t ask that right now.” Draco’s demeanor made a switch from intimidating to exhausted. His previous towering presence looked more mournful than anything.

“Ok,” said Y/N, willing to take something else over nothing. “So...why are you here? Where are you actually from? What happened to your dad?”

Draco drew in a few slow breaths. “My family’s name is Malfoy. I never lied to you about that. We’re from England, like you think. But we’re not really from the same world as you.”

He looked at her, gauging her reaction. When nothing came, he continued. “I’m...magic, as you would probably say. Like, wizards and witches and shit. Like the stuff all of you here celebrate for Halloween. Just more real.”

“You’re off your rocker is what you are,” said Y/N. “Magic isn’t real.”

“You’re right, it isn’t,” Draco replied, his tone wearing down. “Not to you. It’s very real to me.”

“Were you in a cult or something because that’s absolute batshit cra--”

“Oh my fucking God can you just listen,” he said in one long-winded breath. “Thank you. Not that it matters that much if you actually believe me and I’m not allowed to show you any magic--they almost sent me back home for spelling my hair neat that one time in the car with you--but you should believe. Did you really think you were just sick after Homecoming? Like, did you think that was the common cold or something?”

“Well…” Y/N trailed off as realization dawned on her.

“I don’t know how you got into that store, but it was magic. Whatever object you picked up did something to you. You would’ve died from muggle care--the only possible treatment was extracting whatever magic had somehow gotten inside you.”

“So you were the person in my dream.”

“Yes. Anyways. So back in England, my family got wrapped up in some...dark business with a very evil wizard. I had to do some things that I’d rather not get into, and those things were serious offenses in the eyes of the Ministry--which is like your government. I was sent here as a punishment instead of something more severe.”

Y/N snorted. “Assuming all of this is true, why did you get sent to America? Normally exchange students see trips to the US as a kind of vacation...but I do understand the part of Ohio being used as a punishment.”

His face was void of amusement.

“I wasn’t sent here because Ohio is boring,” he said. “I was sent here to be forced to assimilate into muggle society--”

“Muggle?”

“People who aren’t magic. Anyways, that was the punishment. Having to live with and associate with muggles, far enough away from home that I faced no threat of vigilantism and couldn’t escape.”

“Oh.” Y/N deflated into her seat as it all began to hit her. So that was why Draco was so disgusted with her. There was a reason why some gut feeling told her that he would never see her like....that.

“Anyways, for the less exciting part.” Draco turned to rifle around the jewelry box they’d kept in the guest room. “It’s crucial to the safety of my people that you don’t know about us. Muggles get scared, and sometimes they hurt us. They nearly wiped us out a few generations ago.”

He turned around, wielding a small wooden cube that glimmered in the light. “I’m really sorry, Y/N. I have to do this. If they know you know, they’ll send me away.”

“Do...what?” She stared up at him as he approached, holding the square out in his palms. “Draco, what’s going--”

“I told you I’d take care of it,” he said, his tone pleading. “I’m going to make you forget.”

Y/N eyes flickered open. It was chilly in her room--one look confirmed the fact that her window was wide open--but she had a thick blanket pulled over her. As she shed the last pulses of drowsiness, one thought bubbled to the surface:

That fucker.

She sat up, threw the blankets off her bed, and started towards the guest room.

“Hey,” she said, yanking the door open and standing in front of a very surprised Draco. “Nice try. Are we actually gonna talk this through, or are you gonna put me to sleep again?”

“Wha-”

“I remember everything, dipshit. Especially the part where you didn’t let me say my piece before you knocked me out.”

“I-”

“Try and steal my memories again and it’s on sight, Draco.” Y/N sucked in a deep breath and finally slumped down onto his bed. “You were saying?”

“How did you...er...you’re not supposed to remember me,” he said. “Do you have any magic blood in your family? Do you know?”

“Look around. If we had magic blood we wouldn’t be living in Ohio.”

“I’m not joking around.” He joined her and laid back. Y/N tried to not make a mental note of how a few strands of his hair brushed up against her cheek for a second. He smelled of peppermint and pine. “There’s no reason why that shouldn’t have worked. You definitely aren’t magic--I can feel it, no offense--and that Obliviation cube was explicitly created to work on muggles and wipe specific memories of magic.”

“I guess I’m just better.”

“Not funny. I’m definitely going to get sent to some random village in...I don’t know, Siberia for this. And your whole family will be obliviated. The whole point of me telling you was so I could get you to understand why I had to wipe your memory.”

“That’s horribly disrespectful, you know. Not even asking for my consent before doing such a thing? Try again.”

“I will,” he said, sitting up and grabbing the cube again.

Y/N sprung up and scooted away. “Wait! Wait! That was a joke! Can’t we just talk this through? I’m a really good liar.”

“Lying doesn’t matter in front of the Ministry. They have their ways.”

“And what’s the Ministry going to do?” she asked. “Because, right now, it looks like I know about your secret and they’re not knocking down my door yet. Are they seriously going to break into my own home and perform some kind of lie detector test on me out of the blue? Are they really gonna cause a scene like that? No? I didn’t think so.”

Draco looked even paler than usual as he examined her from the other side of the bed, his adam's apple bobbing up and down as he swallowed. “I hope you’re grasping the severity of this. This isn't a fun little joke. This is the difference between my community living or dying.”

“I get that. But if I say I’m not going to tell anyone, then how is your community at risk?”

“You can’t promise me that.”

“Draco.” Her tone was strong enough to make him snap his head up and meet her eyes. “You saved my life. I’ve lived with you for almost 3 months. Trust me when I say I don’t want anything bad to happen to you. Swear on my life.”

The silence was tangible between the two as he stood there staring.

“You have to trust me,” said Y/N. “Please.”

Draco met her eyes again, a type of helplessness written so deeply into the etches of his face that he nearly looked like a different person than the proud, posh British boy that was usually him. “Okay.”

“Okay.” She let out a sigh of relief as he put the cube back into the drawer.

“Don’t get too comfortable, though,” he told her. “Once I figure out how to fix this, I won’t need to trust you anymore.”

“You’ve been trusting me with your life since the moment you got into a car with me for the first time. Do you have any idea how many teenagers crash on the freeway? I don’t get why this is so different.”

He scowled. “I think it’s very obviously different.”

“I can pull up the stats for you real quick if you want. Just so you can grasp the severity of the situation that you’re minimizing right now.”

“Damn it, Y/N, you don’t understand!” Draco slammed his hands on the dresser, the wood making a loud smack sound as it connected with his palms. She jumped. “All my life I’ve been...You just don’t understand.”

“You have no other option, Draco,” said Y/N.

“I...I know.”

The next few weeks were profoundly uncomfortable. If it wasn’t just for the fact that there had been a burglar turned home invader turned...whatever on the loose, Y/N was now dealing with the fact that her world as she knew it was turning upside down.

Draco was magic. He was different, and while this at first had been difficult for Y/N to believe, she began to realize just how much sense it made. The way the most ordinary of daily objects confused him...his discomfort with using the internet...his distaste for all of the people he met…either he was raised under a legitimate rock or he was telling the truth....

And perhaps the most conclusive revelation regarded his stance on his feelings towards her. After that night at Sylvia’s, Y/N had begun to think that there might be something there, or at least that something there might’ve been possible.

Now she knew that it wasn’t. And she had to be okay with that.

Draco was for the most part normal apart from the fact that his wariness around her was obvious. She could feel him keeping a close eye on her in the halls when she spoke with her friends. Sometimes he’d even level a look in her direction, a clear demand written all over his face: Not a word. You promised.

Evening teas stopped entirely. Draco ate in his room for breakfast and seldom said anything on the rides to and from school, and, to be entirely honest, it helped. She could feel her hopeless crush become weaker as the month of November wore on. Her giddy excitement towards a possible love interest was directed to the nervous dwellings on her UChicago application.

Results were out on December 3rd, and she was absolutely buzzing. Fuck weird blond boys that came into her life and told her of an entire mystical and magical world out there--the gothic, hallowed architecture of UChicago was waiting for her.

“Honey, it’s almost 5!”

“I know.”

Y/N sat, cross legged on her bed, as she looked at the email she’d received moments ago from UChicago. In 3 minutes, the portal would open up. And her fate would be decided.

“Don’t open it yet, your father and I are coming!” Mrs. Y/L/N yelled from the kitchen.

She smiled--for once, her father had managed to take a night off of work to be there for her. The only person missing in their home was Draco, and she supposed that he didn’t count anymore. At least not in the classic way.

5:00pm.

“Hold on, hold on.” Her father’s voice carried down the hall, paired with the sound of feet thumping up the stairs.

Her parents appeared in the doorway, rushing to her and peeking over her shoulder.

“Are you ready to open it?” Mrs. Y/L/N asked, placing her hand on Y/N’s shoulder.

“Uh...yes.” Her stomach flipped as she pressed her mouse over the blue hyperlink, directing the screen to show a login page. She wasn’t quite sure what it would look like--perhaps her decision would be right there when she logged in--but despite her racing thoughts, she input her portal information, pressed enter, and squeezed her eyes shut.

Dead silence.

“Honey.”

Her mother’s voice was strife with...some kind of emotion, whatever it was. Y/N dared to pry her eyelids open just a pinch, giving her just enough vision to read out the clear “CONGRATULATIONS” spanning the entirety of her page.

“Oh my god. Oh my god!”

The euphoria that followed was indescribable. Her father’s arms, encircling her shoulders in a way he hadn’t done since she was a child, her mother’s professions of how proud she was...incredible.

The only thing sullying it was a Draco shaped figure looming in the doorway once the hysteria died down.

“What happened?”

“I got into UChicago!” she exclaimed, her voice brimming with enthusiasm.

He simply stared at her, his gaze cool and uninterested. Y/N felt all the joy drain from her face. “I hate to butt in, but I have some news too. I’ll be traveling back home for the holidays.”

“Oh.” Irritation was written clear as day across Mrs. Y/L/N’s face. “When will you be leaving?”

“Tomorrow.”

final a/n: heyyyyyy everyone let me know what you thought. what do you guys think will happen next chapter? how do you think this is going to end overall? ik this is a draco x reader but do you guys think that draco still has a ways to go before he can have feelings for y/n? or does he already have them? im inch rested please lmk your thoughts

also my endless apologies to ohioans i did not mean to add the slander in there ik that plenty of you are lovely people <3 cancel me if you wish

#draco x reader #draco malfoy x reader #draco imagine #draco malfoy imagine #draco #draco malfoy #dracotok #draco x oc #draco malfoy x oc #draco x you #draco malfoy x you #draco x y/n #draco malfoy x y/n #tom felton

120 notes · View notes

xenteaart · 3 years

Text

Black Tights and Other Things

Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Reader

Summary: It was initially insipred by a request about Five seeing Reader wearing a dress for the first time but I lost it, and also took the request in a completely different direction lol. I deeply apologize, I suck at writing requests honestly.

The actual summary: Five catches you dancing and has a little epiphany.

Warnings: this fic explores ideas of femininity and is very likely not gonna be a good read for gender non-conforming folks, so sorry about that.

GIF not mine! if u know the owner pls let me know so i can credit them

Note: it was mainly based on my own experience and i guess i just had to reflect on it smh and Five literally has more of a featured role in this ngl :’D

also yea it fits into my Commission AU so just a reminder, they’re both in their 20s.

P.s. ladies, dance in your underwear in front of a mirror, don’t deprive yourself of reconnecting with your inner,,, divine. lol i’m not in a cult i promise it just feels very good

The one thing you’d missed the most, apart from hot showers, fresh food and other obvious life-saving necessities, was music. During your stay in the absolute nightmare that your post-apocalyptic life was, you weren’t fortunate enough to stumble upon a record player or, in fact, anything that was even remotely fit to produce sounds resembling melodies. Sure, you did play tin cans and pieces of wood out of boredom, making very simplistic copies of actual instruments out of them, like drums or a xylophone, but it was barely enough to satisfy your craving for proper music.

So now, being a Commission recruit and having your own flat and access to the wonders of civilization, you couldn’t help but take advantage of all the things that you’d been longing for, one of them being music.

You and Five were having a very well-deserved day off and decided to reward yourselves with some nice filling dinner. Five volunteered to do the grocery shopping for the ingredients while you chose to stay indoors, and when he came back, holding bags full of goods in his arms, the image that he was met with stopped him dead in his tracks.

You were only wearing your underwear and a pair of black half-transparent tights, which sort of looked like you were getting dressed but got distracted halfway. The outfit itself, or lack thereof, wasn’t at all an unusual occurrence, considering how each other’s nudity and physiology hardly ever bothered either of you after years of doing whatever it took to keep the other alive.

It was your dancing that took Five by surprise. As he eyed your figure briefly, he took notice of how the line of your tights was sitting on your waist securely, framing your form in a flattering way and defining the curves that you got after gaining some weight you’d been desperately missing.

In your days in the apocalypse, you felt like your body was your prison. Or rather, you were a slave of your own body. It needed food, sleep and warmth to keep living, and your entire existence was narrated by the weak and needy vehicle that you had to take care of. There was truly nothing pretty about dull and brutal survival.

Right now, however, you felt yourself regaining control as you were no longer your body’s servant and instead it was yours. It was healthier, stronger, and it was complying to your every wish and command.

As your entire being, mind and flesh, surrendered to the raw ecstasy of your dance, you completely forgot there was anything at all in the world besides yourself and the music, the waves of which you were surfing so smoothly and naturally that the slight clumsiness and awkwardness of some of your movements were only adding to the charm.

There was no choreography behind the action; your every swing and turn being mindless and somewhat intuitive as you allowed yourself to dissolve into the tunes of the song you were dancing to.

As Five was looking at you silently, he was struggling to put his finger on what exactly was so special about what was happening but he knew there was clearly something.

You didn’t really think of yourselves as a boy and a girl, or a man and a woman. Back in the apocalypse, there was hardly anything left of the norms you’d learnt in your before life, which meant you were merely two human beings, completely stripped of their gender identity and expression, and it continued to be the way you perceived each other even after getting back to the normal (well, more or less, all things considered) world.

The concept of having some sort of intrinsic differences was getting more and more blurred as you saw each other as perfectly equal, which you totally were. Equal, however, did not mean the same, and that was exactly what you both tended to forget in your day-to-day life.

As Five was watching you move to the music carefree, he came to realize he was witnessing what he never knew was there in the first place.

It was fair to say that after spending so much time together Five basically knew you inside out. He knew you were caring and thoughtful. Outspoken, ill tempered and tough were a crucial part of the package as well, but right now he felt like he was getting a glimpse of this new unfamiliar layer, looking past everything he thought he knew about you before.

It was the unconditional femininity that was deeply embedded in the very fabric of your essence, burning with radiance like an exploding supernova, and the best thing about it was how blissfully unaware you were of its presence. Right in this moment, it seemed you didn’t have a care in the world and were simply dancing like no one was watching.

There was something so powerful about your inherent feminine nature mixed with how untamed yet tender and perfectly reliable you were, that Five didn’t even notice he’d been holding his breath.

He didn’t want to startle you and disrupt the flow you were so clearly lost in, literally immersed in some other dimension that he had no way of ever coming in contact with. It was yours and yours only, and it was beautiful.

Five was just standing there, leaning against the doorframe utterly mesmerized by how your body was seemingly guided and led by an invisible force. It took him a good couple of minutes to realize that this force was coming from within you, and the sheer unfiltered power radiating from your figure was, in fact, you all along. And he finally saw you for what you were. A woman.

“Oh, God,” he thought to himself, unable to deal with the sudden surge of feelings and thoughts that were overwhelming him all at once.

#five hargreeves x reader #number five x reader #five hargreeves x you #number five x you #tua fic #my fic #my writing #five hargreeves #number five #The Umbrella Academy

209 notes · View notes

luffles424 · 4 years

Text

Kairos

☼ Pairing: Seokjin x reader

☼ Genre: A/B/O dynamics, college au, omega!reader, Alpha!CEO!Seokjin, s2l, fluff, smut, minor angst (they’re idiots)

☼ Count: 25.6K

☼ Warnings: teasing, marking (+ a little blood), unprotected sex (stay safe kids!), knotting, creampie, multiple orgasms, impreg kink, minor dom/sub undertones, oral (f receiving), fingering, pillow humping, dirty talk, praise kink, heat sex, seokjin is a soft alpha

☼ Summary: kairos καιρός (greek, n.) - the perfect, delicate, crucial moment; the fleeting rightness of time and place that creates the opportune atmosphere for action, words, or movement

When your financial aid falls through for your last year of school, you fear you’ll have to drop out and postpone your degree. Until Taehyung gives you a suggestion to make a lot of money, quick. His idea can’t possibly end well, can it?

☼ a/n: So, guess who’s not dead? Sorry it took so long to get something new out, life’s been... busy. I’ve got other stuff currently in the works and I hopefully won’t take quite so long to put something else out again. Anyway let me know what you think! My ask box is always open ~ 💙💙💙💙

You stared at the letter from your school, reading it for the fifth time and hoping that maybe, just maybe, the words had rearranged, said something different. Anything else. Changed to say something other than there was a problem with your financial aid. That it fell through and that your tuition, the full semester tuition, would be due in just two weeks when classes started. You felt your throat closing up as tears blurred your vision, panic at what you were supposed to do now clawing at your throat and stealing your voice. Distantly, you heard a door down the hall open.

Seconds later, arms were wrapped around you, the letter falling from your limp hands to lie on the ground innocently, like that piece of paper didn’t just effectively ruin your life. You’re guided to sit on the couch, where you promptly buried your face in their chest, breathing in the comforting scent of vanilla and alpha. A choked sob leaves you and your hands reach up to clutch at their shirt, desperate for some kind of grounding. A hand rubs soothingly at your back as they murmur soft words to you, words that you can’t make out of the rushing noise in your ears, as they wait for you to calm down. Minutes passed and you take a deep shuddering breath, feeling marginally better despite the fact that you felt like your world was crumbling.

“Think you can talk about it now, babe?”

You sit up a little, scrubbing your hands over your face before looking up at Lisa’s concerned face. You give a small shrug before looking down at your lap. She rubbed your back again.

“I can call Jimin over if it’s an omega thing and you don’t want to talk to me about it. I know I don’t always get everything and you know I won’t be offended if you need him instead of me.” She offers, tugging her phone from her pocket.

You shake your head. “It’s not. I-” You paused, swallowing back a fresh wave of tears, trying to ignore the panic that threatens to swallow you. “My financial aid fell through... I- I have to have the whole semester paid in two weeks.” You pause to take a deep breath. “Even the payment plan installments are too big for me to afford.” You look at her with watery eyes. “I can’t finish my last year.”

“Oh, honey.” She frowns, voice sounding as wreck as if this were happening to her and not you and fully wraps her arms around you. “We’ll figure something out, I promise. You’re going to graduate with all of us if it’s the last thing we all do.”

You hiccuped a laugh at her proclamation. “You make it sound like you all are going to war for me.”

You feel her shoulders lift in a shrug. “You know we all would.” She murmurs, pressing a soothing kiss to your temple.

The two of you sit on the couch in silence for a while, Lisa’s alpha presence doing wonders in helping to keep you calm and grounded while you try to think of anything you could possibly do to get the money for school. But you come up horribly empty for anything you could do that would suddenly get you that much money. And as the time crawls by, you feel more and more despondent.

Your pondering, Lisa called it sulking but you maintain that you were spending the time trying to think and solve this, is interrupted by a knock at your door and you shoot Lisa a look, knowing full well that you should’ve known that she was up to something. She had been far too quiet since she’d gotten you to stop crying. She gives you a wink in response and rises to go open it. Seconds later, you’re enveloped in another hug as your house appears to be invaded by the rest of your friends. You chuckle as Jimin rubs his cheek against yours before he’s sitting and pulling you close with an arm around your waist. He maintains a hand on you even as he turns away to direct someone you can’t see from your position. Your other friends trail in, all leaving comforting touches and the comforting blend of their scents on you before migrating elsewhere.

You see Taehyung and Jennie carrying bags into the kitchen after they pass you, Tae ruffling your hair and Jennie swiping a hand across the back of your neck. Jisoo squeezes your shoulder, not breaking conversation with Lisa as they follow the other two to the kitchen. You turn to Jimin, eyebrow raised.

“Did I forget about plans or something?” You question, given the events earlier, you wouldn’t put it past you to have forgotten plans. It certainly didn’t help that you all collectively invaded each other’s apartments on almost a daily basis.

Jimin shakes his head, giving you a little squeeze and you can tell by the way his eyes flit around your face that his instincts are telling him to comfort, so you reach up and grab his hand, twining your fingers together. “Lisa told us what’s going on. We came to cheer you up.” He grins.

You look from him to the bags that you can just make out on the counter, they look suspiciously full of bottles, and back again. “And you’re going to do that, how?” You ask skeptically.

Jimin winks. “Drinking.”

Hours later finds you splayed out on the floor, pleasantly drunk and your mind is blissfully free of any money worries for the moment. Jungkook and Rose had showed up not too long after the others, promptly joining the festivities as Jimin had enthusiastically poured a few shots down each of their throats. He claimed it was in the name of them catching up to everyone else. You suspect he just wanted someone else to take shots with, since everyone already present had switched to mixed drinks after the first couple of shots much to his disappointment, because you catch him sneaking a shot or two for himself.

Taehyung flops a hand out, hitting the part of you he can reach which ends up being your shin. You giggle, squirming a little so you can look at him.

He beams at you as he pushes himself up onto an elbow. He pauses for a moment, blinking a few times like he’s trying to focus on something, which you suspect isn’t far off because the world is probably spinning from how quick he sat up. “I know how you can pay your tuition!”

Jimin shoves him and Taehyung collapses back to the floor with a huff, breaking into drunken giggles for a moment as Jimin hisses out, “I already told you that’s a stupid idea.”

Taehyung sticks his tongue out at him once he’s got his giggles under control, though the grin stays firmly in place. “Let her decide that.” He tilts his head so he can look at you again. “It’s the best idea ever. Trust me.” He pauses for dramatic effect, the room quiet as they wait to hear his grand idea and you can hear Jimin mumble something about Taehyung having a death wish. “You can auction off your first time having a heat partner. Any alpha would kill to be your first knot.” He gestures.

Your cheeks instantly flush. That was quite possibly the last thing you had ever expected to have come out of his mouth as an idea. And you’ve known him for a while and he’s had some weird and creative solutions to things before. “Taehyung! I can’t do that!” You instantly protest.

He pouts, gestures growing more animated as he talks. “Why not? It’s literally the perfect plan. You get paid and you get laid. Win win! You said yourself that your heat’s were starting to get worse and you were thinking about taking a partner this next one. Why not make some alpha shell out the big bucks for the honor of giving you your first knot. Alpha’s love that sort of shit.” He looks over to the couch and Jimin’s comment of death wish is starting to make a lot of sense. “Right, Lisa?”

You turn to look at the girl in question too, stifling a laugh at the thoroughly unimpressed look she’s giving Taehyung. “Yeah, Tae. All us alpha’s love exactly that.” She squints at him like she’s contemplating whether it’s worth it to actually get up and you see the fight leave her as she instead chooses to take another long sip of her drink.

He grins, clearly missing the sarcasm and continues like Lisa proved his entire explanation to be true. “Come on. Just think about it. You get to have some awesome sex and you get to finish school.”

“She’s not a prostitute, Taehyung.” Jennie cuts in gently.

“What?” His face scrunches in confusion, like he’s not talking about you selling yourself for money too. “I’m not saying that. Also there’s nothing wrong with sex work. Y/N would just be using what she’s got to her advantage!”

You wave your hand to stop Jennie’s retort, knowing that if you don’t stop this then the claws will come out. You understand her point and you know, as does Taehyung if he weren’t so drunk, that Jennie’s words just aren’t coming out the way she intends them to and you know both are too drunk to understand what the other is saying right now. “Jennie it’s fine. I didn’t think that’s quite what he meant. And Tae, I’m not going to sell myself just so I can finish school.”

Taehyung pouts, arms dropping dejectedly to the floor with a muffled thump. “I’m just saying, it’s an option. You should be open to all options.”

Taehyung lets it drop after that and Jungkook brings out Mario Kart to distract from the suddenly tense atmosphere. You mouth a ‘thank you’ to him and he gives you a sleepy smile. He helps get the game set up before he’s shifting over to you and laying with his head on your thigh. You thread your fingers through his hair, watching as everyone around you suddenly becomes much more animated as their competitiveness is magnified by their drunkenness and you bask in the warmth and love from your friends.

You wake up the next morning with a slight headache and your throat so dry it feels like you swallowed sand. You groan and bury yourself back into your covers, hoping that maybe if you don’t move that you’ll magically feel better. Someone shifts next to you and you instinctively shift closer to the warmth, humming contentedly when Jimin’s bright citrusy scent washes over you beneath the covers. Jimin’s arm wraps around you immediately as you snuggle into his chest, eyes slipping closed again as you think back to your friends suggestions from the night before, knowing you’re going to have to decide on one of them, or maybe all of them since you need so much money. Taehyung’s idea is the first thing that comes to mind and while you try to ignore it in favor of thinking of other ideas, it keeps coming back. You know it’s a bad idea, you know your friends would never fully approve, you’re still slightly unsure how to feel about the idea of doing something like selling sex to a stranger and the possible problems that might arise from that. Instead you purse your lips, shifting even closer to Jimin.

“Jimin?” You whisper, hoping it’s loud enough to wake him up. He hums in response, rubbing his face into your pillow, but otherwise makes no indication that he’s awake. You giggle at how adorable it is. “Jimin.”

His eye cracks open, squinting at you. “What?” His voice is raspy and his arm tightens around you.

Your arms come up, hands fidgeting nervously with his shirt as your eyes slip down because you don’t think you can ask this and look him in the eye. “Do you think I could really make enough money selling off the opportunity for someone to be my first knot?”

You feel Jimin tense beneath your hands and you refuse to look up. You don’t know what you’ll see, but you know you wouldn’t be able to handle whatever look it is, you’re in a much to precariously emotional place right now.

“Y/N, please don’t tell me you’re actually considering Taehyung’s harebrained scheme to make money, are you?”

You swallow. You don’t want to admit that his idea seems like the best way to make the most money quickly. That you think it might be your only chance to pay for school. That a little part of you maybe likes the idea of a bunch of alpha’s fighting for you with their money.

Jimin tilts your chin up gently, forcing you to look at him. He studies your face for a moment before he sighs. “You’ve already decided.”

Your cheeks flush but you shoot him an indignant look. “I have not! I wanted your opinion. You’re the only other omega I know well. Tae’s just a beta, he doesn’t really fully understand a heat, no matter how much he helps you out.”

Jimin hugs you close, stroking your hair and you feel yourself deflate a little. “I think that, whatever you decide is the right choice and I will be behind you 100%. I think the concept is dumb, but the idea of alpha’s fighting for you is actually pretty amusing.” He pauses before continuing, pressing his grin to your forehead. “Okay, no I’ve changed my mind. Please do this. I want to see those dumb brutes throw their money at you for something as silly as being your first heat partner when you were thinking about giving it to some alpha on campus for free.” He pulls back and his grin is full of mischief. “Take em for all they’re worth.”

You snort at that. “I don’t think anyone will pay that much for it. Hopefully it’s just enough to help with school.”

And so that’s how you find yourself sat at your laptop, Jimin practically glued to your side as you work to create a website for this. Jimin tries to be helpful, but you both are lacking in the skill department for building something quite like this. After a half hour of struggling, Jimin smacks your arm.

You rub the spot as you glare at him. “Um, ow? What was that for?”

“We’re so dumb.” He rolls his eyes and pulls his phone out. “Why are we not calling Rose to come help with this? You know, since she’s a computer science major and this is literally what she’s good at.”

You blink at him, a little dumbfounded. You really should have thought of that in the first place before deciding you were fully capable to build a website this complicated. You pause though, fear of her judgement when she finds out what the site is for creeping up. Jimin must see the hesitation on your face because his expression softens and he sets his phone on the coffee table.

“We don’t have to. I’m sure with enough time… and googling, we can figure it out. But you know Rose loves you and wouldn’t judge you. Besides, I’m fairly certain that out of all of us, and after Taehyung, she’d be the most likely to start up a job as a camgirl. Easy money and it’s fun and you get men groveling at your feet? Sign her up.” He laughs.

You chew your lip thoughtfully, Jimin makes a good point and so you nod your assent. He beams, retrieving his phone and tapping away at the screen. Rose shows up 20 minutes later, glancing from Jimin to you then back to give him a thoroughly unimpressed look.

“You said this was an emergency?”

He nods, ushering her to the couch where your laptop resides on the table. “It is an emergency. We desperatly need your help getting money from dumb alphas.” He grins.

She raises an eyebrow before turning to you. “Can you please make sense?”

You laugh, fidgeting as you explain what you want to do and that you don’t know how to do that, but you were hoping that she does and would be willing to help. She looks pensive for a moment and the longer she remains silent, the more you begin to worry that this was the wrong thing to do. But before your thoughts can get too far, she’s reaching out to pluck your laptop off the table, settling it into her lap as she begins to pepper you and Jimin with questions about how you want the sight to look and function. You and Jimin sit on either side of her, watching with wide eyes as your website begins to take shape under her dexterous fingers.

Four hours later, Rose sets your laptop back onto the coffee table after shifting some of the takeout boxes out of the way. She gestures to the screen grandly.

“You tuition ticket, my lady.” She grins then glances at her watch. “Oh, I gotta go, I had plans with Jisoo tonight.” She gives you a big hug and a kiss on the cheek. “I love you and everything will work out. But text me if you need any help with the website.” She instructs as she rises and leaves.

Your nerves start to creep in as you stare at the screen, wondering if this will even work or if you’re just giving yourself false hope, this could all blow up in your face or you could get no one to bid. And suddenly this all seems like a really bad idea, the fear of rejection suddenly much worse. Jimin seems to sense your thoughts and wraps his arms around your middle, chin resting on your shoulder.

“You got this babe. It looks perfect.”

“Are you sure? Should I change the wording? Or maybe add different pictures?” You fidget and Jimin grabs your hands, giving them a gentle squeeze.

“Nope. It looks great. The pictures are great, not surprising since they’re ones that Tae took.” He takes your hand, moving the mouse to the button that makes the website live. He holds your finger above the button. “Ready?”

You squeeze your eyes closed and nod and Jimin presses your finger to the button. You release a breath, peeking an eye open to see that nothing’s changed on the page. You frown and Jimin laughs.

“You gotta give it some time. It just went live. Don’t worry. The bids’ll start rolling in soon.” He pulls away slightly, closing your laptop. “Now, let’s go get changed cause I require coffee and you need to get away from your computer otherwise you’ll stare obsessively at it and call it a failure before it’s even had a chance to get started.”

You’re awoken the next day by a loud crash from the living room. You groan and push yourself up, debating if it’s really worth it. You decide it’s probably best to go and check it out in the event that it’s something bad, so you shuffle out of your room and down the hall to see what’s going on. You were expecting something broken, maybe the ceiling caved in or a pipe burst, what you don’t expect is to see a fuming Lisa being held back by Jimin and Taehyung cowering behind the couch. He perks up when he catches sight of you before quickly cowering again when Lisa lets out a growl and you wince because it sets your own instincts on edge and it’s not even being directed at you. You can’t imagine how it’s making Taehyung feel with him getting the full force of it and you want to go comfort him as he lets out a low whine. Before you can even speak, let alone move, Lisa speaks.

“I can’t believe you put such a stupid idea in her head! That is so incredibly dangerous! Do you know what kind of danger you’ve put her in! What the fuck is wrong with you!” She snarls, seeming to have not noticed that you’ve entered the room with how angry she is.

Jimin rubs her arms soothingly, trying his best to calm the raging alpha. “Lisa, calm down please. Taehyung didn’t force her to do anything.”

Her furious gaze snaps to Jimin and he immediately shrinks at the look. You clear your throat and Lisa looks up, seemingly surprised to see you. Her body goes lax and Jimin tentatively releases her, hands hovering for a moment to test if she’s going to do anything before he’s hurrying around the couch to comfort Taehyung.

You cross your arms as you stare her down, everything in you telling you to do the opposite, that you want to stop her anger, not make it worse. “Jimin’s right. Taehyung didn’t force me to do anything. And do you really think I wouldn’t check out whoever wins before letting them near me when I’m most vulnerable? I thought you trusted my judgement more than that.” You approach Lisa, taking Jimin’s place and rubbing her arms. “You know I would make a plan. You know I wouldn’t let just anyone get me alone. Don’t blame Taehyung for what I chose to do.” You pause, frowning because you realize you hadn’t even told Lisa about the auction yet. “Wait, how’d you even know I went through with it?”

Her gaze shifts behind you and you follow it to see Taehyung giving you a sheepish grin. “I may have forgotten that Lisa was going to be home this morning and came over to tell you about your bids.” When you raise an eyebrow, he runs a hand through his hair. “I may have yelled the highest bid when I opened the door. And Lisa may have been in the kitchen and heard. And that’s not really something that can be easily explained any other way, so she pretty much knew instantly what I was talking about.”

You bury your face in your hands, embarrassment licking at your face. Leave it to that idiot to tell Lisa in the most inopportune time and way possible. You’d had a whole plan on how to break the news to her gently and in a way that wouldn’t involve Taehyung’s possible murder, you really didn’t want to become an accomplice to that. When you look back up at Taehyung though, he’s grinning at you.

“Your highest bid is $13,000, by the way.”

Your jaw drops and you stare at him before your turning away to go grab your laptop. There’s no way what Taeyhung said was true, this has to be some sort of joke. Pulling up the site, you’re stunned to see that Taehyung’s right. Your current highest bid is sitting at just over 13K. You chew your lip, you can’t believe Taehyung’s dumb idea is actually working. You’d had some doubts, but even when you imagined this working, you never thought it’d work to this extent. Hope bubbles in you as you let out a slightly hysterical laugh as you think about how you might actually get to finish school.

“You’ve got to hear this.” Seokjin looks up from the files on his desk as Hoseok pushes into his office, followed closely by Namjoon and Yoongi. He’d be irritated if he hadn’t been distracted anyway, something about this day just feeling off, so their intrusion makes for a welcome break. Hoseok flops onto the couch, reading over something on his tablet as the other two take a seat in the adjacent chairs.

Seokjin waits for Hoseok to elaborate and when he doesn’t he rolls his eyes. “Are you going to tell me or do I need to read your mind?”

Hoseok glares at him before he looks pointedly at the other seat in the little seating area in the office. Seokjin rolls his eyes again before pushing himself up and going to join the others. Once he’s settled, Hoseok finally speaks.

“So there’s this omega that’s selling her virginity to the highest bidder.” He states, flipping his tablet around to show the article to the others and scrolling to show a picture of the omega in question.

Yoongi snorts. “She’s pretty, but that’s such a stupid thing to do. Virginity isn’t even real.”

Hoseok shrugs. “Maybe so. But apparently some people think it is. Because her current highest bidder is willing to pay $95,000 to fuck her during her heat.”

All three of them raise their eyebrows in surprise as Hoseok gives the number.

“No way. You’re making shit up.” Namjoon laughs and Seokjin has to agree, this sounds way too crazy to be a real thing.

Hoseok shakes his head, quickly switching tabs to the omega’s webpage where the current highest bidder is displayed, along with some photos and a little blurb about her and what she’s doing. Seokjin grabs the tablet, reading over the page.

Hello! My name is Y/N! I’m about to be a senior in college. Well I hopefully will be once I have the money, which is where this page, and one lucky helpful alpha, comes in. I’m an omega and I’ve never taken a heat partner or a knot before. So I’ve decided to auction off the opportunity to be my first in order to help me pay for my last year of school! Even if you can’t or don’t want to bid, thank you just for checking out the page :)

“I’ll give her, she’s brave.” And cute, Seokjin thinks as he hands the tablet back to Hoseok.

Yoongi rolls his eyes with a snort. “Alpha’s are stupid.”

The others all laugh. “Yoongi, you’re an alpha.” Namjoon points out.

Yoongi throws his hands up. “Exactly! I’m dumb as fuck! So is Seokjin. And Hoseok. Namjoon is only half dumb, his genius helps balance out his alpha dumbness. Alpha’s are a stupid breed and I honestly don’t know how we manage to not only survive but somehow be considered the top dogs.”

“I take offense to calling me dumb. If it weren’t for me then you assholes wouldn’t have jobs.” Seokjin glares half heartedly at Yoongi.

“If it weren’t for your dad, then you wouldn’t have a job either dickhead.” Hoseok snarks.

Namjoon claps to get everyone’s attention. “Okay, enough talk about statuses. We do have actual business to discuss.” He pulls out a few sheets of paper and a notebook out of his bag, spreading them out on the coffee table.

A few days later, Seokjin is waiting in line to order a coffee. This entire week has been weirdly off and Seokjin is about at his wits end with life, most recently his usual, and favorite coffee shop is closed for the foreseeable future due to some piping issues that they’re taking the opportunity to use to renovate. So he’d had to find a new one on the way to work, which is why he stands here now, surrounded by college students because he forgot that his route to work went by one of the nearby universities.

He debates leaving and just going to the Starbucks in the lobby of his building when a girl at the other end of the counter catches his attention. He observes her for a moment, eyes dragging along her frame, trying to place why she looks so familiar. Then it hits him and he quickly looks away, cheeks heating up. Because that’s Y/N, the omega who’s selling off her virginity to the highest bidder. Hoseok has been keeping them all up to date on how it was going, his last update yesterday before he left Seokjin’s place where they’d all been hanging out. Your virginity was currently going for $166,000.

Seokjin sneaks another peek at you as you wait for your order, tapping away at your phone screen and headphones firmly in place to block out the chatter around you. He decides that those photos don’t do you justice, you’re far more gorgeous in person and Seokjin has to force himself to turn away or else get caught being a creeper and staring. A drink is slid in front of you and Seokjin catches your smile to the barista before your turning and heading out the door. You breeze past him and your scent invades his senses, it’s warm and spicy, it reminds him of his grandma’s baking at Christmas and he could just sink into it’s comfort. He has to fight the urge to follow after you and scent you.

He flushes darker as he jerks back to the line, wondering just where that urge had come from, he’s never had that type of visceral reaction to catching a whiff of anyone. It’s so out of the blue for him that it leaves him reeling a little bit. He tries to shake himself out of it, mechanically ordering his drink and moving to the end of the counter where he can still catch bits of it. When he gets his coffee, he leaves quickly, taking a deep breath of fresh air once he gets outside, trying to rid himself of your lingering scent.

He gets to the office and work quickly distracts him from all thoughts of wanting to bury himself in your intoxicating smell and any interest he may have gained in you. That is until lunch time comes and Hoseok strolls in with his “omega update” as he’s come to call it. Seokjin is quick to correct him today that you have a name and he tries not to think about why he suddenly felt the need to point that out.

Hoseok blinks at him in surprise. “Okay, here’s the update on Y/N. With just a couple hours left, the highest bid sits at $343,000.” Hoseok turns and leaves abruptly, apparently not in the mood to deal with Seokjin and muttering something about him being a moody alpha today and not wanting to stick around.

Seokjin would normally snap back at a snide comment about him being moody but all he can focus on is you and whoever is the highest bidder, suddenly all he can think about is someone spending your heat with you, someone that’s not him. Before he even realizes what he’s doing, he’s pulled up your website and is staring at the bid button. It taunts him, whispers to him that the unsettled feeling in the pit of his stomach would go away if he just hit it. He swallows and shakes his head, he’s being ridiculous. He’s about to close the tab back out when the highest bid goes up and Seokjin’s skin crawls at the thought of whatever alpha just bid touching you.

Then before he can overthink it, he’s hitting the bid button himself, quickly adding his information and what his bid is. A little banner congratulates him on becoming the highest bidder and Seokjin sits there feeling smug and satisfied. He nods to himself, pride and happiness oozing from him as he stands to go get lunch, deciding that he’ll apologize to Hoseok and treat him to his favorite as apology for getting snappy with him.

Seokjin has a full schedule of meetings after lunch and being in his element like this, he forgets that the auction ends soon. He only remembers when he’s sat at his desk going through his meeting notes and happens to catch his computer screen out of the corner of his eye, still open to your page. Thoughts of you flit through his mind again and he takes a moment to look over the page. Strictly out of curiosity he tells himself, he’s just curious at all. He freezes, realizing that there’s only 10 minutes left of the auction and he’s no longer the highest bidder. He apparently hasn’t been for a while because the bids have grown by almost $100,000 since he left.

He panics and watches as another bid comes in and the timer continues to slowly tick down. His thoughts jumbled and his instincts screaming at him to do something, anything to get rid of the possibility of another alpha touching you. He sits frozen for another few seconds before he’s jerking into action and doing the only thing he can think of that makes sense, bidding high enough that no one else can outbid him. He frantically types his bid in, watching the timer until it’s close enough to the end before hitting the button.

The congratulations banner pops up again and then a few seconds later another banner pops up announcing that the auction is closed and announces that Seokjin’s bid is the winner. Seokjin feels immensely proud of himself for winning, relief washing through him at the knowledge that no other alpha was going to touch you. That is, until the reality of how much money he just bid finally hits him. He stares at his screen, trying to wrap his mind around the fact that he just spent $750,000 on an omega and he can’t think of a single rational reason as to why the fuck he did that. He feels slightly panicked, but at the same time relieved.

His phone rings some time later, knocking him out of his black staring at his screen and the mocking little ‘congratulations’ banner and he blindly reaches out to answer it.

“Hello Mr. Kim! This is Jaehee from your finance advising office. We wanted to verify if this was indeed you trying to send this money since it’s a very large amount.”

Seokjin shakes his head to clear the daze he’s been in. “What’s the amount?”

“$750,000, sir.”

“And what’s the name of the account holder it’s going to?”

There’s the sound of typing for a moment before she responds. “It appears to be going to a Ms. Y/L/N Y/N. Is this an authorized transfer, sir?”

Seokjin swallows. He could say no, there must have been a mistake somewhere, could fix his impulsive decision so easily. His eyes flick back to the screen and he sees the little blurb you’d written explaining why you were even doing this, your smiling face next to it. “Yes, it’s authorized. Send it.”

“Right away sir. Have a good afternoon.”

With that she hangs up and Seokjin sets the phone back down, still stunned that he’d really done this. He could’ve stopped this, but for some reason it made him feel worse, thoughts of your disappointment when the money didn’t come. He kind of wants to slap himself, Yoongi was right, alpha’s are fucking stupid. Seokjin is contemplating how he can avoid this getting out to the others, because if Hoseok finds out he not only bid but that he won, and that he won with such a high bid, he’ll never hear the end of it. His computer pings with a new email and he idly checks who sent it when your last name catches his attention and he’s trying to open the email as quickly as possible.

Good afternoon Mr. Kim! This is Y/N. Congratulations on winning the auction and thank you for the very generous bid! I was writing to see when you wanted to meet before my heat to work out the details of how that’ll be spent. My heat is in about a month, but classes start next week so my schedule is going to be a little hectic. I’ve attached my schedule and highlighted some of the best times for me to meet up. Our first meeting will also be supervised by my roommate, who’s also an alpha. She’s very protective and there was no way to talk her out of coming with to verify that you’re not a threat (I’m honestly really sorry she would’ve followed me even if I’d said no so this was the easier way). Anyway, I hope to hear back from you soon! I can’t thank you enough for this.

♥ Y/N

Seokjin can’t help the goofy grin that spreads across his face as he rereads your email. You sound so adorable and he’s already scanning over your schedule to see when he can talk to you in person. He feels skeptical about another alpha coming to the meeting, especially one that is protective of you, but he decides it’s worth it to see you again. It can’t be all that bad.

You’re positive that you’re seeing the computer wrong. There’s no way that number is correct. You rub your eyes as an extra measure, still trying to wrap your head around the number sitting on screen. You refresh your bank page, but the amount now sitting in your account reflects the highest bid. And you’re floored that some alpha seriously just paid you $750,000 to spend your heat with you. You’re honestly surprised that not only Taehyung’s plan work actually worked, but that it worked in such an over the top away.

You hear the others in the living room and you know they’re waiting to find out what the highest bid was. You’d made them swear not to check the website after that first day and so far they’ve all listened to you. But you’re sure that if you take much longer to go out there and tell them the results that they’ll just go check themselves.

You switch tabs to the bidders information, getting his email and typing up a quick message, try to sound calm and collected and not like you’re literally 2 seconds away from crying from pure joy, and sending it off to him. You double check that you have his name right, because you know your friends will ask when you tell them the amount. With that, you gather your laptop and make your way out to the living room. Taehyung, Jimin, Lisa, and Rose are sitting around talking, stopping the second you enter and you shift awkwardly.

“Okay, so that’s not creepy. Why are you guys making this weird?” You whine.

Rose snorts. “You just sold off your heat and you wouldn’t let us stay updated on the amount. We want to know. Spill.”

You make a face before stepping up to the coffee table. You set your laptop down, making sure your bank account page is up, then you flip it around so they all can see the screen, which they quickly crowd around to get a look at. There’s a chorus of gasps and then Taehyung is launching himself over the table to tackle you into a hug.

“Holy shit! I told you! Look at you! You’re the rich friend now! You can treat us to dinner!”

You snort and shove his face away from you. “Did you suggest this just so you could get free food out of it?”

Taehyung looks offended. “No! I wanted you to get enough so you can finish the degree you’ve been working so hard for. I didn’t anticipate that amount.”

“So who’s the lucky alpha?” Jimin pipes up, still staring at the screen with wondrous eyes.

“Um, his name is Kim Seokjin?”

Rose stares at you with wide eyes. “Kim Seokjin?” She repeats and when you nod, she tugs your laptop to her and types something in before turning the screen back towards you. “This Kim Seokjin?”

You blink at the search she’s showing you. The man is gorgeous and if it’s the same Kim Seokjin as the one who bid then you can’t say you’d mind spending your heat with him, he’s certainly a far cry from the creepy old man you had been picturing as being your fate. Jimin is quick to join the two of you on the floor as you all stare at the man on the screen. Taehyung must agree with you because he lets out a whistle as he looks through the photos on screen.

You shrug. “I’m not sure. I mean, the bidding didn’t get a picture. It was just a name and email and the banking info.” You glance over some of the text on the page. “But I think the company they mention is what his email address used. He must work pretty high up to afford that high of a bid.”

“Um, he owns the company.” Jimin adds, pointing to a line you’d skipped over when reading. He reads and then points to something else. “Aaaaaand his dad apparently owns a whole bunch more. Holy shit, you got yourself a rich rich boy.”

You glance over to Lisa sitting with her arms crossed. When she notices you looking at her, she speaks. “That just means I’m definitely coming with. Those rich CEO boys are always so entitled. He’s got another thing coming.”

You laugh. “Yes, Lisa. I know. I already emailed him and informed him that my very protective alpha roommate would be attending our meeting and that the point was not negotiable.”

She nods her approval then her face softens. “I’m glad you get to finish school now.” Then she smirks. “Taehyung is right though. You’re definitely treating us to dinner. I’ll go call the others.”

She stands, walking away as you protest being made to pay for dinner as the others laugh, you protests falling on deaf ears.

That night you’re crawling into bed when your phone pings and you grab it from your night stand to see who’s messaging you. A little smile pulls at your lips when you see that Seokjin has responded already. Eager, you muse with a giggle. You settle back against the mattress, opening the email to see what he’s said.

Hello Y/N. How about we meet tomorrow for lunch? I know a great little cafe we can go to. My treat of course. And I can pay for your friend as well. I’m completely okay with her coming along, I understand the risks you’re going through to do something like this and as an alpha myself, I get where her worry is coming from, so she’s more than welcome to come along. If tomorrow doesn’t work just let me know when you’d like to meet. I look forward to our meeting. And please, just Seokjin is fine.

You bite your lip, a little thrilled that he seems even more eager to meet you already. You really hope Rose was right about which Kim Seokjin this was. You type out a quick response letting him know that tomorrow works fine and to let you know where the cafe is. Then you text Lisa to let her know that you’ll be meeting Seokjin tomorrow and that he’s even offered to pay for her lunch as well.

With that, you snuggle under your covers. You lay there, thoughts drifting to how tomorrow might go and you let yourself drift off thinking about plush lips and broad shoulders.

Lisa’s sat on your bed as you fuss with your outfit, rolling her eyes when she gets fed up with you smoothing out your shirt for the 20th time in 5 minutes. “We’re going to be late at this rate.”

You shoot her a glare before nervously checking your phone for the time, worried that you’ve been too preoccupied to keep to the scheduled time you needed to leave, breathing a little sigh of relief when you see you still have plenty of time. You make a face at Lisa for making you worry and go back to making sure your outfit looked okay. You still are unsure if this isn’t nice enough, the lowcut sweater and jeans are by no means fancy but it’s one of your nicer outfits. You’d looked up the restaurant that Seokjin had sent you and it seemed to be just a casual place, so you assumed this would be fine. You wonder if Seokjin is going to be wearing a suit since he’s coming from work and you decide that maybe you should change so you look more put together.

You move back to your closet, looking through the options. “I want to look nice. What’s wrong with that?”

Lisa smirks a little, standing and walking over to halt your nervous sifting through your closet. “Does this have anything to do with the fact that you might be meeting a certain Mr. Kim Seokjin of BigHit?”

You flush and swat at her hands, turning back to your clothes with the intention of finding something to change into. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I would want to look nice for any alpha who won.” You pout.

Lisa hums, looking thoroughly unconvinced which makes you pout more. She once again takes your hands, this time using the grip to pull you back in front of the mirror. She leaves you there for a moment to grab a necklace off your dresser before she back behind you to help put it on, not so subtly scenting you as she does so. She gives your shoulders a squeeze when she finished, meeting your gaze in the mirror.

“You look amazing, babe. You’re gonna knock him dead.” She winks.

You frown, looking over yourself in the mirror. The necklace Lisa chose sits nicely just above your cleavage, naturally drawing anyone’s eyes down and you’d usually sing her praises for helping you tease a guy, except you know she’s still on edge about this, even with her support and joking. Finally you nod, knowing that no matter her reservations, Lisa wouldn’t let you go looking anything less that stunning and you gather up your bag and phone.

You grin at Lisa. “Let’s go.”

You enter the cafe, glancing nervously around. You realize you hadn’t made a way for you to identify him from the crowd in the event that it wasn’t the Seokjin you thought, hoped, it was. You chew your lip, suddenly feeling even more nervous before you notice a figure nearby stand and turn to you with a bright smile. Your first thought is that he is breathtaking and this must be some kind of bet that he lost cause there’s no feasible reason for this gorgeous alpha to pay such a crazy amount of money just to sleep with you. Then he’s stepping toward you and Lisa and the overwhelming scent of him washes over you and you fight down the whine that threatens to spill. He smells of woodsmoke and comfort and a part of you wants to burrow into it and never leave. It reminds you of campfires with your friends, talking late into the night under the stars and the feeling of home that it reminds you of.

“Ah, Y/N!” He greets, smile widening as he holds his hand out to you and you meekly take it, still reeling from the effects of his scent, eyes widening in surprise when instead of shaking your hand, he raises it to his lips to brush a soft kiss to your knuckles. “Kim Seokjin. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He turns to Lisa, who you note also looks a little blindsided and you tuck that information away to tease her about later. “And you must be the alpha roommate and friend, it’s a pleasure to meet you as well…”

He trails off, waiting expectantly for one of you to fill in her name. Lisa recovers first, crossing her arms and letting a little of the alpha power roll off her. “Lisa.”

Seokjin nods his head in a little bow. “Lisa. Pleasure.” He gestures to the table he’d stood from. “I have a table for us. I figured we could eat and get to know each other a little bit first before we get to the…” He flounders for a second, brows creasing. “Other business.”

He leads you both to the table, pulling the chair next to his out for you but before you can sit, Lisa is sliding into it, shooting Seokjin a look as he quickly school’s the surprise from his face. You’d yell at her for being rude, but save it until the two of you can be alone. Seokjin though, just gives her a smile then moves to the other chair to pull it out for you. You wait a second, half expecting Lisa to switch chairs just to keep you from sitting down and talking to Seokjin and have to fight back the laugh at her switching chairs constantly just to keep Seokjin on his feet and working for this. When she seems content with just being a physical barrier between the two of you, you sit, smiling your thanks to Seokjin as he slides back into his seat.

The table is silent for a few minutes from a mix of nerves and you all looking over the menu. Well, you and Lisa are looking over the menu, when you sneak a peek at Seokjin, you find him already looking at you, menu untouched in front of him. You flush, eyes darting back to the menu, trying to focus on finding something that you think you could eat with the butterflies currently sitting in your stomach.

The waiter comes by soon after and you all order. Silence hangs over the table after the waiter leaves, no one knowing what to talk about. You’re busy sorting through your own thoughts for something suitable to say when Lisa speaks up.

“What are your intentions with Y/N?”

You gasp, smacking her arm. “Lisa! You can’t just ask that!”

She gives you a flat look and you feel a bit like a child being chastised. “Why not? He paid that much for something. Why beat around the bush?” She turns back to Seokjin, eyebrow arched as she waits for him to respond.

Seokjin takes the question in stride, looking very unruffled and even like he expected it, which given your warning, perhaps he was expecting this. He clears his throat, shifting in his chair before addressing you both. “Well, there’s obviously what the original deal was.” Lisa tenses up, about to respond when Seokjin holds a hand up so he can continue. “But, while I feel like the concept of virginity is… well we’ll just say not very great. I don’t think your first experience should be with a stranger during your heat. So I’m willing to change the deal.”

You glance at Lisa and she looks surprised and you cover your mouth to smother a giggle. Seokjin notices and shoots you a questioning look. Lisa looks back at you and you can hear the unasked question in her eyes. You chew your lip, deciding that Seokjin seems like he might take the truth the best. At least you hope he will, maybe he’ll even still be willing afterward.

You straighten your back. “So… In all honesty…” You glance down at your hands, taking a deep breath before continuing. “The media reported everything wrong, they got a little carried away, you know how embellished stuff can get when it starts getting passed around like that. My site only said that I’ve never had a heat partner or taken a knot. Everyone just assumed I was a virgin. I’m not, I’ve had sex outside of my heats.”

Lisa’s hand reaches over and she gives your arm a reassuring squeeze, knowing how nervous you were to reveal that. As the seconds tick past, your anxiety kicks up even more and you finally glance up to gauge Seokjin’s reaction to the news. His face is blank, staring at a spot just over your shoulder. The longer he stays silent the more the atmosphere feels like it’s suffocating you. You’re just about to tell Seokjin that you’ll give him his money back because this wasn’t what he was expecting to get but Seokjin’s sudden snort keeps your mouth shut. His hand covers his mouth and you watch as he starts full out laughing. You look to Lisa for help, but she looks just as perplexed by this response as you.

His laughter finally dies down and he wipes the tears from his eyes as he tries to catch his breath. You clear your throat and Seokjin looks up at you, giving you a smile. “That’s actually incredibly hilarious. I love it. My god, you played the system like a fiddle.”

You open your mouth to say something, but you don’t even have the faintest idea what you should say.

“My earlier point still stands. We don’t have to go through with this. And you can keep the money.”

“You’d let her keep that much money for nothing in exchange?” Lisa sounds about as incredulous as you feel. Why on earth would he let you keep nearly a million dollars without even getting what he paid for. You suddenly feel self-conscious, wondering if you weren’t living up to whatever expectionations he’d had and he doesn’t want to sleep with you now.

Seokjin shrugs, but doesn’t offer any explanation that particularly helps to calm your spiraling thoughts. “Well, I’d hope we could at least continue talking. But for the laughs alone, you deserve to keep the money. I want you to finish your degree.”

Your food’s arrival interrupts further conversation and you take the small repreve in conversation to mull over your options. You never expected Seokjin to let you keep the money while not spending your heat with you. You assumed he’d want something more for how much he paid. Something more than apparently just friendship. You notice Lisa has finished her food quicker than usual and that she’s now standing. You frown in confusion, about to ask what she’s doing when she addresses you both.

“I believe I’ve seen enough.” Dread settles in your stomach before she turns to you with a small smile. “He seems like an okay guy. I trust him.” She turns to Seokjin, delivering one final glare along with a threat. “Don’t fuck this up, I will not hesitate to kill you if you hurt her in any way.”

And with that she’s turning and leaving the restaurant. You watch her go, you hadn’t expected her to even approve of Seokjin, let alone leave and give you time to talk to him alone. You face Seokjin again and he’s glowing as he smiles at you.

“I have to say, that was a little unexpected. Not that she doesn’t seem like a lovely person, but I can’t deny that it’s a very big relief to be able to talk to you without fear that she’s about to rip my dick off.”

You giggle. “I don’t think she’d have gone that far. Especially considering I currently have a vested interest in that particular body part.” You wink at him, delighting in the flush that colors his cheeks. “And I’ve been thinking. I’m okay with spending my heat with you, if you want. I’ll leave the decision to you since you seem to be more unsure.” You purse your lips, looking off in thought, hoping you come off as much more collected that how your mind feels. “If not, I’ll probably just find an alpha from school. I know a couple that have expressed interest in the past.”

The growl from the other side of the table surprises you and you blink at Seokjin with wide eyes just in time to see his eyes flash red. Your breath catches and you stop yourself just before you can tilt your head to expose your neck to him. He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath and you wonder what caused that kind of reaction.

When his eyes open again, he looks much calmer. “No, I don’t think that’s necessary. I’ll help you with your heat. You said it’s in a few weeks?”

A thrill runs down your spin when he agrees and you have to school your face to not appear as eager as you feel. You give a little nod. “Yeah. I can send you the exact date it should be.”

Seokjin thinks for a moment before pulling his phone from his pocket and sliding it across the table to you, a new contact screen shining up at you. “Here, give me your number. It’ll be easier to get a hold of me.” He pauses before adding. “In case your heat comes early.”

You nod shyly, inputting your information and sending yourself a text so you have his number too. You slide his phone back across to him and he gives a pleased rumble as he slides it back into his pocket. The two of you talk a little while longer before Seokjin seems to realize how long you’ve been here and apologizes, letting you know that he has a meeting he has to get too. He walks you to your car, looking unsure for a moment.

“Can I give you a hug?” He asks with uncertainty.

You laugh and open your arms and Seokjin immediately envelopes you in a tight embrace. You don’t miss the way that his cheek drags across your hair and you stifle the laugh at his very unsubtle scenting. You can’t help yourself when you bury your face in his chest, deciding that if he can do it then so can you, feeling a little bit of pride when you finally step back and see the slightly dazed look in his eyes.

You spend the rest of the night trying to dodge your friends’ teasing after they catch the whiff of Seokjin on you. Teasing you even more when you reveal that you’ll be spending your heat with him. You ignore them, spending most of the night staring at his contact number in your phone and feeling the anticipation building in your gut. You wonder if you’re allowed to text him now or if he only gave you his number in the event that your heat started early, which you give him is a lot more forethought about this than you had. You want to talk more with him, the conversation you’d had with him after Lisa left had been fun and you were eager to continue. Something about him put you at ease, despite never having met him before.

Your worries about texting him turn out not to matter because you wake up the next day to see that he’s texted you and you have to fight down the excited squeal that would definitely wake Lisa, and maybe the neighborhood. This leads to more teasing from your friends because you and Seokjin text a lot in the following days. The two of you text about everything, learning more about each other. You find out that Seokjin has a penchant for making dad jokes and you’re glad you have your phone to hide behind so Seokjin can’t see how hard you laugh every time he makes one. You know he’d be far too pleased with himself if he saw how much you enjoyed them and you find it much more fun to tell him the jokes are bad to see him keep trying to get you to react positively. He also takes the opportunity to ask you a lot of questions regarding your heats, everything from favorite snacks, fruits, drinks, what materials felt best, scents you liked, nothing seemed to be off limits to his questioning.

When you question why he’s so curious, he sheepishly tells you that he goes into caretaker mode when he has an omega. So he’s been prepping his apartment, after it was decided that his place was better to spend your heat at because it meant that Lisa didn’t have to find somewhere else to stay for a week, stocking up on things you like and things that he knows help. You’re stomach twists, trying not to think about him helping other omegas the way he’s going to help you. You try to push the thoughts away, the jealousy burning your throat when you think about him with someone else. And so you irrationally decided it’s best to ask him how many times he’s done this to have such a system down.

He doesn’t respond right away and you worry that you’ve crossed some sort of boundary that you didn’t know about. You end up stress cleaning the whole apartment until he finally responds. Telling you that he’s sorry, his friend was having a crisis. He assures you that his system isn’t just his, him and his friends have complied all their experiences together in an attempt to make heats less hard on omegas in their care. Which leads to him telling you about the crisis that had taken his attention. His friend, Yoongi, had tagged along to a dance class their other friend Hoseok was guest teaching at and now Yoongi is having a crisis over an omega that was in the class.

You offer to give Yoongi some advice since you’re an omega but Seokjin declines, stating that it’s way funnier to watch the normally cool, collected Min Yoongi turn into a puddle of pining alpha over an omega that ignored him.

It turns out that Seokjin had good forethought in giving you his number for emergencies, because two days before your heat is suppose to start, you wake up in the middle of the night covered in sweat. Your mind feels hazy and you have no idea what it is that woke you up, first thinking that maybe Lisa had just gotten home, but the silence in your apartment says that’s not true. A shudder wracks your frame and you realize with a small sense of dread that your heat’s come early.

For a moment, you think about how you haven’t prepared anything for your heat before it hits you that you didn’t prep anything because you have someone else who did that for you. And once the thought of Seokjin is in your head, he’s all you can focus on. Your blankets scratch at your skin and you kick them off as a fresh wave of slick drips from you.

You pull yourself together just enough to roll to the side to grab your phone off the nightstand, dialing Seokjin’s number with shaky fingers. The call goes to voicemail and you groan, free hand cupping your mound in an attempt to alleviate some of your rising discomfort. You redial and a few rings later he answers. His snappy ‘what’ sends a shiver through you, wanting to roll over and submit to quell the alpha seeping into his tone.

You whine and Seokjin’s tone changes immediately. “Y/N? What’s wrong?”

You squirm, thighs rubbing together as you try to string together enough sounds to speak. “Heat…”

Seokjin curses. “It came early?” You whine an affirmative. “Shit, okay. Well, you’re obviously in no state to get here so I’ll be over soon okay? I’ll make it all better, little omega.” He coos, voice calm despite how panicky he is feeling.

You whine and Seokjin hushes you, promising he’ll be there soon, that he just has to grab a few things and he’ll be right over.

Seokjin hangs up the phone, cutting off another whine from you that has his heart constricting as he scrambles out of bed. He stuffs his phone into the pocket of his sweats and takes a second to breath and to try to get his panic to subside so he can think clearly. He has to relax because he has you waiting for him, he’s your only relief and he can’t bare the thought of letting you down. And he knows that he needs to be the calm one, that you’re in no state to be the rational one. He takes another deep breath before moving into action, making a mental list of everything he needs to do before he leaves.

He grabs the first tshirt he finds, pulling a duffle from his closet and stuffing a few changes of comfortable clothes into it along with his wallet and charger. He’s about to leave the room to move onto the things in the kitchen when the pile of linens in the corner catch his eye. He pauses before deciding that taking extra sheets along would probably be smart and along with those he grabs the blanket from his bed, knowing that the scent of him buried in the fibers will be soothing to you, ignoring the thought that it’s the scent of him that will calm you and not just the scent of alpha that’s covering the blanket.

He sets that bag on the kitchen table as he begins digging through the cabinets for the things he’d purchased for you. It takes him a few minutes and when all the snacks and quick meals he’d bought for you are laid out on the counter, he realizes he may have actually bought way more than you could possibly ever eat over the course of your heat. He shakes his head, trying to reason that he was just trying to be prepared and make your first heat with a partner a good experience, pushing aside any other thoughts that try to make themselves known. Instead, he busies himself with packing up as much of the food as he can into the two reusable totes he has hanging near the fridge.

Those bags join the other one on the table and Seokjin takes a moment to quickly run through his list, trying not to mourn the loss of all the preping he did that’s now going to waste. Deciding he has everything that he might need while there and that if there’s anything else that he absolutely needs can just be ordered for delivery, he gathers up the bags and his keys and quickly makes his way to the elevator to get to the garage.

Bags safely stowed away in the trunk, he pulls his phone out to shoot a quick email to Yoongi, Hoseok, and Namjoon to let them know that he’s taking his leave early before tucking his phone back into his pocket and getting into the car.

You whine again as Seokjin hangs up. You know he lives across town, you know how long it’ll probably take him to get here even if it’s late and there’s likely to be little traffic. His hanging up has left you in the suffocating silence of your apartment. You debate whether you can try to sleep again until he gets here when you realize that your door is locked and that if you do manage to sleep at all that he’ll have no way to get in. And you can’t guarantee that you’ll be lucid enough later to navigate the house to unlock the door.

With that thought in mind, you push yourself out of bed, wobbling for a second on unsteady legs before you regain your balance. You shuffle out of your room, grateful that Lisa isn’t home right now because just the lingering scent of her makes walking away from her bedroom difficult. And you’re fairly positive that in your current state, you would’ve just climbed into her bed with her were she here and the thought makes you huff in annoyance, hating the fact that your heat pushes your instincts so far to the surface that you’d climb into bed with your best friend without her consent.

You manage to make it to the door and get the door unlocked with no problems and you pause to press your forehead to the cool wood, allowing yourself a moment to use the coolness to keep your mind still partially yours. You turn your head, staring longingly at the couch and wanting nothing more than to just collapse on it and wait, but you know Lisa would probably kill you if you spent any part of your heat on the couch. She’ll probably grouse that you got your “heat stink” all over the apartment, knowing that you’re going to spend the day after airing the place out and lighting some candles to make it bearable for her to come back. At least the weather is nice enough to leave the windows open to do so.

With a last burst of effort, you push yourself off the door and make your way back to your room. You stare distastefully at your bed, knowing that the normally comfortable and soft fabric is going to feel irritating against your skin. You sigh, flopping onto your belly, squirming around until you deem yourself as comfortable as you’re going to get. You get a few blissful minutes where you just lay there in silence, almost peaceful enough that you feel yourself starting to drift off to sleep.

That is until another wave of heat shudders through you. You groan, pressing your thighs together in hopes of getting some relief. When none comes you blindly reach for one of your pillows, propping yourself up slightly and stuffing the pillow between your thighs. You grind against it, moaning at the friction against your sensitive clit. You mindlessly rut against the pillow, slowly growing frustrated when all it does is keep you on edge.

You lose track of the time, only becoming aware of just how much time has passed when you hear a curse behind you followed quickly be the overwhelming scent of Seokjin and alpha. A fresh gush of slick drips out of you and you don’t even think before pushing your ass further up into the air to present to him, the only thing filling your mind being him. You preen at the sharp inhale you hear from Seokjin, pride that your alpha is reacting so well to you but when you don’t hear him make any move closer you whine.

“Alpha…” You coo, wiggling your butt enticingly.

Excitement courses through you when you hear him finally step closer, quickly followed by disappointment when instead of stepping behind you and touching you like you want, he walks around the side of the bed to take a seat. You bury your face in your sheets, ignoring the way they scratch at you in favor of using them to muffle your whimpers. Something clicks onto your nightstand and then Seokjin is reaching out tentatively, hand curling around your forearm.

“Y/N? Where’s Lisa?”

You lean closer to him, shifting enough to bury your face in his thigh to hide the way your face scrunches up at his mention of your friend. “Out with Jisoo.”

Seokjin threads his fingers through your hair, scratching lightly at your scalp. “Did you tell her your heat started?” You shake your head, practically purring at the attention he’s giving you. You feel Seokjin move and you grab his arm before he can withdraw the hand on your head. He chuckles. “Don’t worry, princess. I’m not going anywhere. Can you sit up for me though?”

You shake your head and Seokjin chuckles, free hand landing on your shoulder and gently nudging you. “Princess, I need you to sit up. I know you didn’t take any birth control since this was a surprise so I need you to take it now, but you need to sit up first.”

You grumble but relent to his nudges, sitting back on your knees, moaning when the shift has your core dragging across your pillow. Seokjin’s gaze drops to the pillow, tongue darting out to wet his lips. His hand drops from your shoulder to touch the damp spot you’ve created and he growls. Your hips twitch at the sound, wanting nothing more than to shift forward the few inches separating your soaked core from his hand. He seems to read your thoughts, hands quickly pulling away and then he’s turning slightly to grab something off your nightstand.

Turning back, he holds the pill in his hand up to your mouth. “Open, princess.”

You obey, tongue sticking out slightly as he sets the pill onto your tongue and you let the tip drag ever so lightly across the pad of his finger as he withdraws it. His eyes darken but rather than do anything about the lust you see swirling there, he simply holds out a glass of water to you. You frown, taking it from him and taking a sip to swallow your pill. When you try to hand it back, he pushes it back towards you.

“Drink it all first. I need to call Lisa.” He says, reaching for your phone.

You pout, confused by his refusal to cave into what you both want, and more importantly, what he paid a lot of money for. He lifts it encouragingly towards your mouth and you reluctantly take a few more sips. Seemingly pleased, he nods and turns his attention to your phone, tapping at the screen a few times before bringing it up to his ear.

It rings a few times before a giggling Lisa finally answers. “Y/N! Hey, I thought you’d be asleep by now!”

“Hi, Lisa.” Seokjin stares pointedly at the glass in your hands when he sees you’ve stopped drinking. You make a face at him but drink more of it.

“Seokjin? Why do you have Y/N’s phone? Is she okay? Is something wrong?” Lisa sounds increasingly worried as she asks questions.

“Lisa, calm down. She’s fine.” He glances at the pillow still firmly between your thighs and swallows. “Well as fine as she can be. Look, her heat started early. And it started while she was asleep so I can’t get her back to my place.”

Lisa swears under her breath. “I don’t know if I can find a place for that long. Shit, and I don’t have any spare clothes.”

You drain the last of the water and nudge the glass back towards Seokjin, beginning to grow frustrated with his dismissal of you. He takes it with a wide grin, placing it back onto the nightstand then let’s his hand rub your thigh in silent praise. You hum happily at the soothing contact.

“Don’t worry, Lisa. You can stay at my place. The deskman knows what you look like so he’ll let you up. The door code is 92324. Some of my spare credit cards are in the top drawer of my desk in my office and you can take one and go buy some clothes so you have something to wear.” Seokjin’s thumb rubs absent circles on the skin of your thigh while rattling off instructions to Lisa.

You squirm closer, finally having enough of Seokjin ignoring you for other things and you decide to do something about it. You reach out, placing your hands on his knees. His gaze flicks to your face then drops to where your hands are slowly creeping up his thighs. His eyes narrow at you.

“What? You can’t be serious, that’s far too much.” Lisa protests.

You fiddle with the hem of Seokjin’s shirt, smirking when his focus is more on you now and you let your hands slowly drift over to the bulge in his sweats. You see his jaw clench and grin victoriously, knowing that you’re winning.

“It’s fine, Lisa. This was unexpected for all of us.” You rub more at the bulge and Seokjin swiftly gathers both your wrists in one hand and pins them to the pillow. “Look, I need to go. I gave you an option. You’re free to take it or leave it. We’ll let you know when it’s over.” He grits out, abruptly hanging up and tossing your phone with a loud clatter back onto the nightstand. His eyes are dark when he focuses back on you and he yanks you closer by the grip he still has on your wrists. “You are just an impatient little omega, aren’t you princess?”

You whimper, hips pressing against the pillow as you feel your mind go hazy. “Alpha…” You whine.

Seokjin smirks, watching the way your hips twitch against the pillow. His free hand settles on your hip and he starts to guide you in grinding against the pillow. “You’ve made quite the mess of your pillow, princess.” He muses. “But I think we can make it dirtier.”

Your whole body feels like it’s on fire at his words and you’re nodding helplessly at his words, eager for him to finally touch you.

“I’m going to let your hands go, but you can only touch my thighs, got it?” He waits for your acknowledgment before continuing. “Good girl. I’d hate to have to punish you for disobeying.”

You flush at his praise. He releases your wrists, his other hand joins the first on your hips to better guide your grinding. You moan at the drag of your soaking panties against your clit. Your hands immediately find Seokjin’s thighs, fisting the fabric of his sweats to keep your hands from wandering like you so badly want them too, you want to feel more than just the shifting muscles of his thighs beneath your palms.

“Alpha… Seokjin, please…” You move faster with Seokjin’s direction.

Seokjin hums. “What, princess? What do you need?” He coos, giving your hips a squeeze.

You whine, trying to move faster to chase your high, but Seokjin’s grip keeps you going at the pace he wants you to go. “Wanna cum… Please… Let me…” Your head drops back as you pant. “Seokjin…”

“What a good girl you are, asking your alpha’s permission first. I didn’t even have to tell you.” You nod eagerly and Seokjin smiles. “You have been very good considering how long you had to wait.” His hands slip under your shirt and the contact with your skin makes you gasp. “You can cum, princess. But you can only use your pillow to get off.”

His hands slide up to your waist, relinquishing control of your pace back to you. You quickly pick up your pace once he lets you, moaning as you rock faster against your pillow. Seokjin’s hands slide further up, thumbs brushing the bottoms of your breasts. A few more rocks of your hips, the friction of your dampened panties against your clit, combined with Seokjin’s fingers digging into your skin has you, finally, tipping over the edge you’ve been on since you woke up.

You shudder, gasping Seokjin’s name as your orgasm wracks your frame. You continue to give a few weak grinds as you ride it out until your body relaxes and you would collapse if not for Seokjin’s hands on your ribs holding you up. He chuckles at your sudden bonelessness, carefully shifting you to lay you down then tossing the soaked pillow from the bed. He turns back to you, smiling fondly as he strokes your cheek.

“Feeling a little better?”

You sigh contentedly, mind feeling less hazy. “Very.” You lay there for a moment, eyes closed and enjoying the small reprieve you’ve gotten. Then you look up at him in alarm. “But wait, what about you?”

Seokjin laughs again, grabbing your hand when you reach out to touch his still very prominent erection. “Don’t worry about me. Trust me, I’ll be fine.”

You pout. “Who said I was worried for you in that scenario?”

Seokjin stretches out beside you, manhandling you around until he can pull you tightly back against him, dick settled firmly against your ass. “Since your sleep was interrupted, I’d highly suggest you get some sleep now while you still can princess. I’ll be here to take care of you when you wake up.” He pauses to give a hard grind against your ass. “And by then, the pill while have kicked in and I can fuck you like you want. Nice and hard, little omega, and fill you up nice and full like you need.”

You whine, slapping playfully at the arm he has wrapped around your waist. “You just said to get some sleep. You’re just going to get me all riled up again.”

Seokjin’s nose drags across your shoulder to your neck as he inhales deeply. “Sorry. You just smell so divine, princess.” His tongue touches your neck and you feel your arousal spark again. “I bet you taste even better than you smell.”

You groan, pushing your as back teasingly. “Seokjin, either let me sleep or fuck me.”

He blows out a frustrated breath. “I can’t fuck you yet. It hasn’t been long enough and it’s not safe.”

You give him a smug smirk over your shoulder. “Then let me sleep.”

He smothers a laugh in your shoulder before he’s standing and grabbing a blanket off the floor and covering you. You’re enveloped in the scent of him and the silk caresses your skin as the fabric settles against you.

You look over the blanket then up to him. “This isn’t mine.”

“Very perceptive of you. It’s mine and it’s silk. The scent will help you sleep and the silk is because I know cotton gets itchy against your skin while your in heat. I’d change your sheets but you seem comfortable so that’ll have to do for now.” He picks up the glass from the nightstand. “Now get some sleep. I got here in a hurry and so your kitchen is a bit of a mess so I need to go prep that so that it’s easier for me to get to things I need.”

He runs a hand through your hair comfortingly once more before he’s turning and leaving the room. You listen to him move around for a few moments before your exhaustion creeps back in and you find yourself drifting off to sleep surrounded by Seokjin’s scent.

You wake up sometime later, you have no idea how long your body allowed you to rest but it seems intent on making up for the downtime if the fire currently in your veins is anything to go by. Your panties stick to you uncomfortably and you move to try to remove them but a firm weight is settled around your waist. Once you notice the weight, you realize that Seokjin came back at some point and got back into bed with you. You gasp, body burning impossibly hotter and you immediately push your ass back against him, filled with the need to feel him inside you.

The arm around you tightens as a growl rumbles in his chest, vibrating against your back. You squirm at the sound, you’re fairly certain your eyes probably also flashed golden and you’re a little glad that they’re currently squeezed shut so that he couldn’t see, despite the fact that you’re also facing away. Some bratty part of you that’s struggling to remain doesn’t want him to know just how much he’s already affecting you, but logic is quickly failing you because if it was still functioning, you’d realize that he doesn’t need to see your eyes to know how you’re being affected. Slick drips from you and the tshirt you’re wearing suddenly feels stifling. As you try to fight the shirt off, your flipped onto your back and Seokjin is hovering above you, a sleepy smirk stretching his lips.

“My, my. Someone’s being naughty, hm? You can’t even properly wake your alpha up? You’ll just grind against him while he sleeps?”

He pins your arms when you try to reach out for him and you whine. He takes both wrists in one hand, leaving his other hand free to slip under your shirt. You gasp, pushing your body up into his touch and he chuckles, nudging your legs apart with his knee so he can settle between them.

“Are you going to tell me what you want? Or do I need to punish you?” His voice is tinged with his alpha tone as his hand slides up and cups your breast.

You blink a few times, trying to clear enough of the haze to respond. You swallow the sudden dryness in your throat. “Please, alpha…”

Seokjin chuckles and the sound makes you shiver. “Mmm, close, princess. Do you wanna try again?” You whine again, hips bucking up to try to get some friction and Seokjin tsks you. “Ah ah. None of that, omega.”

Your core clenches at the reprimand and you bite your lip on another whine. You take a deep breath, regretting it almost instantly when your met with the overwhelming scent of Seokjin’s own arousal. “Alpha, fuck me. Please, please, I need you, need your knot, please.”

Seokjin gives a pleased hum, squeezing your breast once before his hand is sliding down your body and cupping your pussy through your panties. “Much better, princess. Good girl.”

You warm at the praise, hips pressing your pussy further into his hand. He doesn’t pull away this time though, instead he tugs your panties to the side and slips two fingers inside. Your back bows and you instantly clench around him.

“Please, please more, alpha, Seokjin. Please.” You roll your hips, fucking yourself on his fingers.

He slips another finger in and you moan. He pumps them faster, thrusting in counterpoint to the rolling of your hips. “I think I quite like seeing you so desperate to come, princess. First on your pillow, then on my fingers. Maybe I’ll give you my tongue next. Gotta make sure you’re nice and relaxed for my knot. How does that sound, princess? Want me to eat you out next? I bet you taste even better than you smell. And you smell absolutely intoxicating.”

He hooks his fingers and you gasp when their probing presses against your g-spot. You wriggle your wrists, wanting to touch him. “Seokjin, lemme touch you too, please.” You whine.

He chuckles, but releases your wrists and you bury your hands in his hair, yanking him in for a kiss. He makes a noise of surprise against your mouth, not expecting the touch you wanted to have been a kiss, before he’s kissing you back enthusiastically. His tongue runs along the seam of your lips and you happily open up for him. You groan at the taste of him, hips working faster as Seokjin rubs your clit with his thumb in time with the thrusts of his finger.

You turn away from the kiss with a gasp and Seokjin uses the opportunity to trail his lips along your jaw and down your neck where he leaves a few nips, though you want far more than just nips on your throat.

“Come on, princess. Cum for me.” He growls against your neck and it makes heat pool in your belly.

Seokjin licks a stripe up your neck before biting and sucking a mark onto your neck and that finally pushes you over the edge and you cum with a cry, pussy clenching tightly around Seokjin’s fingers as he continues pumping.

When the last of the shudders stop, he gingerly removes his fingers, bringing the glistening digits up to his mouth. His eyes darken at how wet they are before he pops them into his mouth and a sound somewhere between a moan and a growl rumbles in his chest.

“Fuck, I was right. You taste divine.” He refocuses on you and his hands rub at your thighs. “Are you feeling okay, though? Do you need anything?”

You blink at his shift in demeanor, from domineering alpha to caretaker, thoughts now a little clearer thanks to the orgasm and you giggle. “I’d be better if I had your dick already.” You wink.

Seokjin’s eyes flash and he ducks down to kiss you senseless before sitting back with a smug smirk when you just stare at him speechless. His hands grasp the bottom of your shirt, pushing it slowly up your body and you lift your arms to help him tug it off.

“Fuck, you’re gorgeous.” He murmurs, seemingly distracted by the newly exposed skin.

He presses a gentle kiss to your lips, then he’s moving further down to dust kisses across your collarbone. A soft sigh leaves you as his plush lips leave a burning path down to your breasts. A hand comes up to palm one while his mouth envelopes your nipple. Fire floods your veins as your heat hits you fully again. You push your hips up but Seokjin is a step ahead and is pinning your hips to the bed before you can so much as raise them more than an inch.

He lifts his head just enough to speak, breath blowing across your spit slick nipple. “Relax, princess. Your alpha will take care of you, don’t worry.” He soothes, thumbs stroking the skin of your hips.

You chew your lip, body protesting the thought of waiting for what it needs. You give him a small nod and he coos praises against your skin as slowly works his way down your body until he’s settled between your legs, faced with your soaked panties. You’re torn between hiding from his gaze and shoving your pussy into his face but Seokjin saves you from having to choose by digging his fingers into your thighs and holding them open.

He nips at your thigh, soothing the sting with his tongue and then he’s giving the same treatment to the other leg. When he’s satisfied with the blooming marks on your skin, he licks at your pussy through your panties, lips wrapping around your clit through the fabric and sucking.

You swear, burying your hands in his hair and he chuckles. “You’ve absolutely ruined your panties, princess.”

You whine in embarrassment, tugging lightly at his hair. “Don’t tease.”

He chuckles, pressing his tongue teasingly against your clit. “But you look so pretty all flustered and desperate, princess.” He gives another lick. “And I like hearing you beg.”

“Seokjin, please. Please stop teasing. I want your mouth on me. Please, I’ll do anything.”

Seokjin glances up at you, eyebrow raised. “Anything, huh? That’s a dangerous promise, princess.” He glances back down at your panties and licks his lips. “But, you’re in luck. I’m feeling particularly generous right now.”

With that he tugs your panties down and tosses them off the bed. He groans at the sight of your bared pussy and you spread your legs further apart in a bid to entice him to give you what you want. His thumbs brush along your pussy lips before he’s grabbing handfuls of your thighs and pressing his tongue firmly against your clit.

You chant out yes’s as his tongue traces around your clit, occasionally dipping down to your entrance before returning his attention to your clit. His fingers dig into your skin and you know there will be bruises in the shape of his fingers there later and you revel in that knowledge. Little growls and groans leave him as his mouth works against your pussy and the vibrations send pleasure shooting through you.

Your hands tighten in his hair when he slips two fingers into you while his plush lips wrap around your clit. He sucks and you cry out, pleasure building so fast after your recent orgasm.

“Come on princess, I can feel you clenching around my fingers already. Be a good omega and cum for me.” Seokjin murmurs against you before he’s back to sucking on your clit.

You whimper and he crooks his fingers just right to rub at your sweet spot. He pumps his fingers faster then grazes your clit with his teeth and your orgasm rushes through you. You cry out his name as your release gushes around his fingers. His fingers slow as your moans quiet down until he withdraws them completely, letting his tongue take their place to clean up the mess you’ve made.

You expect to feel some relief, but Seokjin’s tongue continuing to work has heat spreading through your limbs again and you suddenly don’t feel sated in the least. You feel frantic with need and you know the only thing that’ll make you feel better and so you give his hair a tug as you whine. “Seokjin… want your cock, please.”

He sits up, face shining, as his tongue darts out to lick his lips. He wipes the rest of your release from his face with the back of his hand. His hair is disheveled from your tugging and his lips are swollen and red. He looks unfairly debauched for the fact that he’s still fully dressed and you’ve come multiple times already. When he makes no moves to give you what you want, you decide to just take it.

Before he can comprehend what’s happening, you’ve pushed him onto his back and planted yourself firmly in his lap. You groan when your pussy drags across the fabric still separating you from his cock. Seokjin halts you from moving further, fingers digging into your hips in warning.

“Princess.” He growls out and your instincts have you going nearly boneless, baring your neck to him with the overwhelming need to submit.

You’re flipped onto your back, smothered for a moment in Seokjin’s bulk and scent and you’re positive you could die happy under him. He rears back, nearly tearing his shirt in his haste to get it off of him and your eyes trace along the breadth of his shoulders to his thick neck and down to his chest. His skin is smooth and the muscles that ripple beneath as he moves to shuck his sweats off has you clenching.

Then your eyes are drawn lower as Seokjin finally gets his sweats off and your mouth floods at the sight of his cock, hard and shiny with precum and so thick that you’re torn between wanting him to shove it down your throat or stuff your pussy so full that you can’t think. Seokjin catches your stare, chuckling as he reaches down to give himself a few pumps, thumb swiping across the plump, red head.

“See something you like, princess?” He teases.

You tear your gaze from his cock to meet his eyes, nodding dumbly because you’ve been robbed of all words. He smiles, body blanketing you once again as he leans down to capture your lips, cock brushing your pussy as he holds himself above you. You whine, hips tilting to get more of his cock pressed against you. Seokjin groans, hips grinding lazily against your pussy, lips trailing to nip at your neck.

“Alpha, please…” You pant, reaching up to dig your fingers into the meat of his shoulders.

He nods against your neck, one hand leaving the bed to reach between the two of you and he positions himself at your entrance, pausing with the head pressed to your hole and pulls back to meet your eyes. “Are you sure?” He swallows and blinks a few times to clear some of the daze. “Once I start-”

You cut him off, shifting just enough for him to slip an inch into you. You both moan and the stretch of just the head has your desperation rising, the overwhelming need to be mounted clawing at your insides. Seokjin must feel the same because he pauses for only a second longer before he’s slamming fully into you. You gasp, nails digging into his back as he immediately pulls back out just to thrust back in. He buries his face in your neck, breath puffing warm against your skin as he pants harshly with his rough pace.

“Fuck you’re so wet, princess. You’re such a good girl, a good little omega.”

You whine as the praises continue to flow from him and he grabs your hips to hitch them higher, manhandling you around into the position that he wants you in. The shift has him hitting you deeper, rubbing your walls in all the right ways and you’re already so close to coming again. Tears gather at the corner of yours eyes and you roll your hips as best you can with his thrusts to get some friction on your clit.

Nails prick your skin and you gasp, staring slightly wide eyed as Seokjin pulls away from your neck with a devilish smirk. “Now now, princess. I’ve given you so much already, let your alpha has his turn.” He slows his pace and you pout but his smirk just grows. “Besides, I’d much rather you come on my knot.”

His next thrust has your pussy stretching further as his knot begins to form. Your breath hitches as the growing girth stretches your more.

“Yes, yes, yes, please let me have your knot, please, please.” You beg, body feeling aflame at the promise of what you want most.

“Yeah?” Seokjin growls, licking up your neck to nip your earlobe. “You want my knot that bad, baby? Want me to knot you and fill you nice and full of my come? Keep you all plugged up so you get pregnant? Fuck… You’d look so amazing all swollen and round with my pups.”

You nod along, words only fueling your desire more. He slams his hips against you one last time before his knot finally grows too large and he settles for grinding as the first pulses of his release fills you.

“That’s it, baby. Fuck… You’re such a good girl. Taking my knot and cum so so well. Shit, gonna get you all nice and full of pups.” You moan and Seokjin slips one hand down to rub at your clit. “Such a good omega, so good for my pups.” He murmurs and a few circles of his thumb coupled with his knot and cum filling you so delightfully full has you clenching around him as your mouth drops open in a silent scream as you cum. Seokjin groans, lips finding yours for an uncoordinated kiss as you both ride out your orgasms together.

Your brain finally feel clearer and you enjoy the quiet mingling sounds of both of your breathing. You bask in the blissful feeling of being full and after what feels like hours, but is nothing more than a few minutes, Seokjin is sliding an arm beneath your back, keeping you close as he carefully maneuvers you both so that he’s now on his back and you can curl up on his chest while you wait for his knot to go down. You hum in contentment when his fingers thread through your hair, massaging your scalp.

“Sleep.” He murmurs, chest vibrating against your cheek and you rub your face against his chest in a sleepy nod, following his advice and your own body’s sudden exhaustion.

You wake up later, alone in bed, stretching and the delightful soreness has a small smile gracing your lips before you realize that the cause of that soreness is nowhere to be seen. You finally sit up, belatedly realizing that that sticky mess you were expecting is definitely not there. And now that you’re more awake and looking around, you notice that you’re sleeping on different sheets, ones that are definitely not yours.

You’re about to climb out of bed when you hear footsteps padding down the hall towards your room and a moment later, Seokjin, now back in his boxers, is nudging open the door, carrying a plate of something you can’t quite make out and a glass of water that upon seeing makes you realize how dry your throat feels. You make grabby hands for it immediately and Seokjin blinks in surprise for a second at seeing you awake before he’s chuckling and coming closer, handing you the water once he’s close enough.

You start guzzling the water, the coolness soothing the roughness you were feeling in your throat. Seokjin tuts, pointedly looking at the glass and how quickly you’re consuming it and you sheepishly slow your swallows. He gently pulls the glass away before you can finish and you pout. He chuckles, setting it and the plate on the nightstand before taking a seat on the bed with his back against the headboard. He gathers you up, situating you in his lap until he’s happy with how you’re sat.

He grabs the plate and you notice it’s full of fruits and cheeses, all of them your favorites, much to your delight. Your stomach grumbles and Seokjin reaches for one of the slices, holding it to your lips for you to take. You hum happily as the flavor of the fruit mixes perfectly with a taste that you can’t put a name to, just that it’s all Seokjin.

After a few minutes of silent feeding, Seokjin gives you your water back to finish. You hand the glass back once you’re done, cuddling back into his chest with the intent to nap a little more.

He nudges you when your eyes start to slip closed, holding another piece of fruit up for you to take. “Eat a little more first, princess. It’s only the first day, who knows when you’ll have another long lull. Best to fill up now. At least so I don’t have to fight you as much later.”

You duck your head in embarrassment, opening your mouth obediently when he presses the fruit to your lips. You try not to think about the fight he’s gonna have to put up with when your heat really kicks in and you don’t want to do anything but sit on his dick. You’re glad the worst of your heat is always fuzzy and you hopefully won’t have to remember the worst of it.

He feeds you a few more bites before he deems you full enough, then he’s rearranging you both so you’re laying down and he pulls your back flush against his front. His lips press gently to your shoulder. “Sleep now.”

And you don’t have to be told twice before your eyes are drifting shut.

When you wake up again, you blearily notice that at some point you both have shifted positions. Seokjin’s now on his back and you’re curled into his side, one leg thrown over his and your dripping core pressed to his thigh, soaking his boxers. You grind your hips forward, moaning at the drag of the fabric against your sensitive pussy.

Seokjin mutters something, shifting slightly, but remains asleep as you rut against him. You bury your face in his chest, taking a deep inhale of his scent before lazily mouthing across his collarbone to his neck. The fire in your belly intensifies and you scramble to climb fully on top of Seokjin, pushing his boxers down just enough to get to his cock and you’re delighted to find that he’s already hard. You wrap a hand around it, giving him a few strokes before positioning it and fully sheathing it within you.

Seokjin starts awake with a gasp, hands finding your waist immediately even though he doesn’t seem to fully realize what’s happening yet. His eyes fall to you, more precisely where you’re already bouncing on his cock, not even seeming to mind that he’s not fully awake. His grip on you tightens in an effort to pause your riding but you just switch to grinding when he restricts your movements.

He chuckles. “Fuck, couldn’t even wake me up, princess? Such a needy little omega that you’re just going to take what you need, hm? Not even gonna wake your alpha up to help you?”

You whine, continuing to rock against him. His words fuel your movements, but the meaning to them is lost in the haze. Seokjin chuckles when you ignore him and the sudden loss of his hands has you faltering. You glance at him finally, finding him laying there with his arms tucked under his head, looking the perfect picture of relaxation. When he sees your attention on him, he glances pointedly back to where you’re joined.

“Oh, please. Don’t let me interrupt. Feel free to continue what you were doing. I was just getting comfortable.”

Your protest is on the tip of your tongue, you want to whine about how you want his hands on you but his cock twitches where its buried in you and you lift yourself up just to drop back down on him, head thrown back as you begin to ride him in earnest. Seokjin, to his credit, seems to struggle with his self imposed promise of just sitting back and letting you work if the way his biceps flex is anything to go by. But he stays still, much to your frustration as you continue.

You quickly grow frustrated though, slamming your hips down one last time before you dig your fingers into his chest and whine. “Alpha, please…”

He grins up at you. “What is it, princess? I thought you didn’t need me.”

You whine again, grinding against him, but shaking your head. “No, no. Need you. Please, Seokjin.”

He chuckles, but to your delight he moves his arms from behind his head and his hands rest warm and heavy against your thighs. “What do you need, princess?” When you don’t respond right away, he gives your thighs a small squeeze. “Tell me what you need. I can’t help my omega if she doesn’t tell me what she needs.”

You shudder, trying to find the words to speak what you need through the fog blanketing your mind. “Knot… Need your knot, please. Please, want it, Seokjin.”

“Yeah? You need it, princess?” He coos.

You nod enthusiastically, gasping when he shifts his legs to get leverage so that he can thrust up into you, his hands on your waist holding you in place. “Yes, yes yes, please, please please. Alpha…”

You feel his knot starting to grow, catching your rim with every thrust and the feeling makes your toes curl. Seokjin’s fingers tighten and he gets a handful more thrusts in before his knot is too large to pull out. You groan and his hands shift to your hips to guide them in grinding on his knot as he did before with your pillow, praises flowing from his lips. When you finally start grinding without his guidance, his lets his hands slide up your body, palming your breasts and rolling your nipples between his fingers.

“Cum for me baby. Cum on my knot, show me how badly you want my cum and pups.” He growls, pinching your nipples harder.

A few swivels of your hips has you moaning his name as you cum, pussying squeezing him tight as he pumps you full.

You get flashes of moments over the next few days. You know at one point, Seokjin has to resort to feeding you while you’re knotted because you refuse to not be filled. And even then he still struggles to get you to actually eat the food rather than just sucking on his fingers. Another time you corner him in the kitchen while he’s getting you water. Pawing at his cock and whining when he snatches up both your wrists in one of his hands. Which means your next most logical thought is to drop to your knees and mouth at his cock instead. You get your mouth around him, gag reflex diminished thanks to your heat and you suck on his cock until he starts to shallowing thrust into your mouth. Then his hand tightens around your wrists and you’re being yanked to your feet and bent over the kitchen table. He fucks you hard and fast, hand coming down to quick swats on your ass as he talks about how you’re being awfully naughty. You cry when he knots you that time, Seokjin shushing you, cooing at you and telling you that if you drink your water then he’ll forgive you and you’ll be his good girl again. You’ve never drank a glass of water quicker.

He tries to get you to shower but your legs don’t want to cooperate for that, and a little part of you wants to be bratty again, so he sighs and draws a bath. Which you make him join you in and results in something soft, that if you were in a different state of mind would probably make your heart ache with how sweet and caring and gentle he was being. Although it ends with water sloshed all over the floor and were you not in heat, you’d feel really bad for the messes he’s been cleaning up.

Your heat is blessedly shorter than usual with the addition of a partner. Rather than spending a whole week being miserable and horny, it finishes after just 4 and a half days and you wake up feeling far more refreshed than you usually do after your heats. You notice the bed is empty beside you and that your room has been tidied up. Your gut churns with disappointment, tempted to bury your face into the pillow Seokjin had been using just to get another whiff of his scent, but soft singing coming from the kitchen draws your attention.

You slip out of bed, taking a moment to stretch your sore limbs. You foot catches something as you go to step away and you stoop down to examine it. The tshirt is wholly unfamiliar to you and when you hold it up to your nose, humming in content when you realize it’s Seokjin’s and he must have missed it when he was cleaning. You debate for a moment on returning it to him but something in you protests the thought and you tug it on instead and you decide that you’re just going to chalk the feeling up to residual hormones from your heat. You stand and make your way to the kitchen, leaning in the doorway and watching quietly as Seokjin cooks, still singing softly to himself.

A few minutes pass like this before he speaks. “You just gonna keep creeping in the doorway or come in for breakfast?” He glances back at you to wink before turning back to the pan in front of him.

You chuckle, moving to the cabinets to gather what you need to set the table. “Maybe I wanted to enjoy the show.” You say as you take a seat at your kitchen table, propping up your chin on your hand to return to watching him.

Seokjin turns, sliding a few pieces of french toast onto a platter that from the glimpse you get is already piled high with it. He brings the plate to the table before going back to the fridge and grabbing a big bowl of fresh cut fruit and a bottle of juice. You look from the literal pile of food to Seokjin with wide eyes.

“Did I miss something? Are you feeding an army?”

He chuckles, grabbing a few slices of french toast and a couple spoonfuls of fruit, plucking a piece of melon from his plate to eat before finally answering. “No. But this is your first real meal in a few days. Once you start eating you’ll realize just how hungry you are.”

You pout and want to argue, but the smell of the food is too enticing and so instead you grab some food and start eating, choosing to very pointedly ignore the fact that after the first bite you feel like you could probably eat all the food on the table plus find something to snack on in the fridge. You both eat in silence and you can’t quite tell if it’s a comfortable one or an awkward one. On the one hand, Seokjin’s presence is calming and you feel more relaxed than you have in a long time. But at the same time, you want to speak, but you have to idea what you can talk about with the guy who paid a crazy amount of money to sleep with you during your heat and whose cock you were literally begging for just a few hours ago. And you realize that you don’t even know if he wants to talk about anything. For all you know, this is just lingering alpha protectiveness and once breakfast is over, he’ll gather his things and leave.

“Not good?” His voice drags you from your musing and you’re quick to shake your head, stuffing another bite into your mouth.

“No, no. It’s amazing. Just still a little sleepy, I guess.” You half lie.

He watches you for a moment with pursed lips before giving a small nod and going back to his own food. You eat a little faster, deciding that once your finished and clean everything up that you’ll test the waters and see if he maybe wants to stay a little longer and watch a movie. It’s innocuous enough, you can always play it off as just a precaution to make sure your heat is really over. That it has nothing to do with the fact that you really don’t want him to leave.

With your food finished, you gather up the dishes to take to the sink, beginning to clean up and Seokjin comes over to join, taking the dish towel to begin drying the dishes as you clean and then putting them away. The two of you work in silence, finishing the dishes in no time.

When you finish, Seokjin hands you the towel so you can dry your hands and you both stand in silence, this time it’s definitely awkward. You’re just working up the courage to ask if he’d like to stay, maybe watch a movie or something when he beats you in speaking.

“Well… I guess I should probably get going. I’m sure Lisa would like her own place back.” He rubs at the back of his neck, avoiding your eyes as he speaks and you try really hard not to read into the fact that he won’t look at you now.

You frown, quickly hiding your disappointment when he glances at you. You give a small nod. “Right, sure of course. I’m sure you’ve got work and stuff too. Company won’t run itself, huh?” You weakly joke.

He chuckles, nodding as he makes his way to the door where you notice his bags are sitting, already packed. You feel a twinge in your chest as you watch him pick them up and slide his shoes on. He turns and hesitates for a second before giving a small smile.

“I hope I gave you a good experience for your first partnered heat.” You give a little nod and his smile grows. He gives a little wave. “It’s been a pleasure, Y/n.”

With that, he’s out the door and you let your smile drop. You sigh, feeling oddly empty with him out of the apartment now. Shaking the thoughts from your head, you move to the windows to open them to start airing the apartment out for Lisa’s return, lighting a couple of candles around the room as well. You enter your bedroom, expecting to have a mess to clean up but Seokjin seems to have thought of everything already, your room clean and tidy and the windows already cracked. You sit on your bed, wondering if it’s always this way after heats, if the sudden loneliness is usual of arrangements like this or if maybe it’s just cause it’s your first time having an alpha during heat. Maybe the attachment you felt is normal and so the way you feel abandoned is too and will pass in a day. At least that’s what you try to reason to yourself as you think about how maybe you should have insisted that Seokjin stay just a little longer.

You take a deep breath, Seokjin’s scent drifting off the shirt you’re still wearing and it has a weirdly soothing effect on you, calms your thoughts even as they swirl with doubt. You crawl up the bed, tugging the pillow he used over and bury your face in it. Letting his scent lull you to sleep because you know once Lisa gets home that all of your friends are going to flock over to question how it went.

The week crawls by slowly, classes don’t help either since it’s still early in the semester and so the work load hasn’t particularly picked up yet. You find yourself having an increasingly difficult time sleeping, the only thing that you’ve found that helps is cuddling the pillow that is slowly losing Seokjin’s scent. And you really try not to think about any implications from that. In the last two days you’ve also gotten a headache that refuses to leave no matter what you take and has begun to get worse with time.

Which is making the attempt to power through movie night incredibly difficult. Even with the lights off, the flashes from the screen cause searing pain and of course it had to be Jungkook’s turn to choose and he of course choose a Marvel movie, full of flashing and loud noises. And since everyone’s seen it already, everyone has made it time to talk and joke around.

A particularly loud explosion has you squeezing your eyes shut and clenching your teeth. You’re so caught up in willing the pain to stop that you fail to notice the whimper that escapes you or the fact that the room goes dead silent after. A few moments pass before you realize there’s no sound and you squint an eye open to notice that everyone is staring at you with concern, the movie paused in the background.

Jimin is closest and slides closer instantly, gently setting his hands on you, checking for anything that could’ve caused the noise of distress. Lisa slides closer too from her position on the floor, wrapping her hand around your ankle and you feel a little of the tension and pain bleed away.

Jimin frowns when his preliminary check turns up nothing obvious to have caused a problem. “What’s wrong?” He whispers, seeming to at least gauge that sound is hurting you.

You weakly wave him away. “Just a headache. I’m fine.”

“Again?” Jisoo chimes in from the other end of the couch and Jimin’s frown deepens, as he glances from Jisoo back to you.

“How long have you had a headache? Do you need something?”

You give a small shake of your head. “It won’t work, it’s fine. It’s just been a couple days. It’s probably just stress. I’ll be fine.” You want him to stop, you don’t want him to probe further, to try to get to the root of the problem. You hope he leaves it at that, believes it’s just stress.

Jimin purses his lips, watching you for a moment before he’s gently tilting your head to get a better look at your face. “You haven’t been sleeping. And you’re losing color.”

You pout at him. “You make it sound like I look like shit.” You attempt to joke, anything to distract him.

Jimin ignores your comment. “How long have you felt like this? Are there any other symptoms that you’re not telling us?”

You squirm uncomfortably under the scrutiny and look down at your lap as you mutter the answers to his questions because you know if you don’t answer then he’ll just keep pressing. “Since last week. It was just hard to sleep at first. Then I was just exhausted all the time like I’d been awake for a long time while doing a lot of hard work. The headaches started a couple days ago.”

Jimin mulls that over. “Before or after your heat?”

You flush, you wish everyone wasn’t around right now. You want to go seek comfort in Seokjin’s shirt and pillow. “After.”

“After Seokjin left?” He clarifies.

He prods you when you don’t respond right away, something uncomfortable churns in your gut at the direction this is going. “Yes. After he left.”

Jimin is ominously quiet and when you glance up, you see him sharing a worried look with Lisa, who shifts closer to rest her cheek on your thigh as Jimin takes hold of your head. “It sounds like you’ve got bond sickness.”

A hysterical laugh bubbles out of you, your mind violently rejecting that idea. “That’s not possible. I don’t have anyone to be bonded with.”

Lisa gives you a reassuring squeeze. “Bond sickness happens when you spend your heat or rut with your mate but don’t complete the bond.”

“If Seokjin was my mate, I think I’d know. And he would too. He wouldn’t have left afterwards.” You hate how pitiful you sound. “This was just some fun for him. It’s not bond sickness.” You try to reason, glancing around the room at your friends who all have varying degrees of pity on their face and you wish even more that he hadn’t done this in front of everyone. Everything feels like it’s too much. You turn back to Jimin, feeling tears beginning to well in your eyes. “It can’t be bond sickness.” It comes out soft, almost in audible. Your hand tightens around Jimin’s. “It can’t be… b-because if it is… Then- then that means I’m not Seokjin’s mate but he’s mine.”

As soon as the words leave your mouth, Lisa’s up off the floor and pulling you into a hug as the tears finally spill over. The rest of your friends move too, crowding around to lend you what comfort they can.

Seokjin’s glaring at his computer screen, again because that’s all he feels like he can do to the stupid device lately. It refuses to function the way he wants it to. Most of his work has been picked up by others since he’s been back and he drums in fingers against his desk in irritation at the fact that people seem to think he can’t take care of his own company. Agitatedly, he clicks out of his calendar, that sits empty and he knows that it’s wrong but he can’t figure out why it won’t update to say he has something to do today. A soft knock pulls him from his thoughts and he looks up to see Namjoon slip in. He sniffs and turns back to the screen.

“What.” He says shortly.

“I wanted to see how you’re doing.” Namjoon says placidly, completely unphased by Seokjin’s mood and takes a seat across from Seokjin.

Seokjin snorts. “I’m just fine, Namjoon.”

Namjoon raises his eyebrows at his tone as if to emphasize how not true that statement is. Seokjin chooses to ignore him, opening his email to at least appear that he has some work to do, even though his inbox sits woefully empty. “You can’t even look at me. And you never call me Namjoon. Seokjin, I love you man, but what’s going on? You know you can talk to me, talk to any of us.”

Seokjin mulls that over for a minute. He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes and scrubbing his hands over his face, he feels tired, just so tired. He has no idea what the hell is going on with him. When he pulls them away, Namjoon notices too just have tired he looks. “I don’t know, Joon.” He says, so quietly that Namjoon almost misses it. “I don’t know and that terrifies me.”

“Okay, that’s fine. We’ll talk it out and we’ll get this figured out. We’re here for you, Jin.” Seokjin crosses his arms and sits back, waiting for Namjoon to start. “Well, you’ve become increasingly aggressive and irritable since you’ve been back. You snapped at Hobi in a way that hasn’t happened since college and you were both trying to date the same person and your alpha’s both got a little too possessive. You can’t seem to focus on anything and you’ve obviously not been getting much sleep.” He pauses thoughtfully. “Is there anything else we haven’t seen that’s been happening?”

Seokjin rubs idly at his chest before looking down at where his hand sits. He taps it once. “My chest aches. Like… something’s hooked through it and tugging. It just… it aches.” He finishes lamely.

Namjoon nods and mulls everything over for a few moments. “I don’t know if this would be something you want to hear, but it sounds like you’ve got bond sickness.”

Seokjin rolls his eyes, feeling irritation prickle his skin. They all joke with each other, but he didn’t think Namjoon would ever be one for such a cruel joke. “Yeah, Joon, that’s what it is. It’s been 2 weeks. It’s not bond sickness. Good joke, man.”

Namjoon looks unimpressed with his response, stares Seokjin dead in the eyes as he snaps at him. “Kim Seokjin, there is no way you are actually this dense of an alpha.” Seokjin’s eyes widen at Namjoon’s tone. “You’ve been this way since you got back from spending her heat with her. Not only that, but you spent an inordinate amount of money just to make sure no one else could touch her. Which, you’ve also mentioned, you only did after catching her scent at a coffee shop you both happened to be at. You’re a smart man Jin. Put it the fuck together.” Seokjin opens his mouth to respond, anger mounting at Namjoon’s accusations, but Namjoon stands and effectively cuts him off, placing his hands on the edge of the desk and leaning into Seokjin’s face. “Because just think about this, if you’ve been feeling the bond sickness, then do you know who else is? Y/n. And while alphas get irritable and angry with bond sickness, do you know how it turns out for omegas? They get sick.” He pauses before continuing, tone soft and serious. “Then they get really sick.”

Namjoon straightens and turns, pausing at the door. “Fix your shit, Seokjin. Don’t bother coming back to work until you do.”

“Lisa, please go to class.” You whine, trying to shoo her fretting hands away from you. Ever since the revelation of what was wrong, she’s been practically suffocating you with attention, you think that she thinks if she just gives you enough alpha attention that it’ll help you get better. You don’t have the heart to tell her that that’s not really how bond sickness works. Plus, when she’s not being completely overbearing, the extra companionship from her is nice.

She frowns, taking in your huddled form on the couch. “You’ve been getting worse. I don’t want to leave you alone.”

“I’ll be fine. Jungkook said he’d be over soon. You’re going to be late.”

Lisa adjusts your blanket one last time, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “Fine. But you message if you need anything at all, got it.”

“Yes, mother.”

She makes a face at you and you give a weak laugh, knowing how much she hates when you say things like that. Her face softens a little as you shudder and adjust your blanket around you.

“You’re gonna be late. Go. I’ll be fine.” You pout, looking up at her with puppy dog eyes, trying to get her to go. At least one person in this apartment should be regularly attending classes. You are grateful that Jimin went to the health office to talk to them about what’s happening and managed to get you excused for a little while from having to attend classes. On top of that, after emailing your professors, Taehyung’s been stopping by their offices to pick up or deliver some of the work you manage to get finished.

She huffs. “Alright, alright. Fine. But if Jungkook is even a minute late, you tell me and I will be right back.”

You roll your eyes. “I actually feel sorry for whoever your mate is.”

Lisa pauses in gathering her things to glare at you and you grin back. Lisa’s mate is going to be the most spoiled being on the planet. Lisa slings her bag over her shoulder, coming back over to you to press a kiss to your forehead.

“I love you. I’ll be back later. Try not to traumatize poor Jungkookie.”

You wave her away, finally turning your attention back to the TV now that Lisa is done with her fretting. You hunker further into your blanket as Lisa finally leaves. You doze off for a while, the tv show you put on doing little to keep your interest when you feel so terrible. And without Lisa here, you don’t have to keep the front up that you feel better than you actually do. You know the sickness will fade and you’ll eventually be fine, if a little dead inside, but that doesn’t stop you from wanting to keep your friends from worrying more about you than they already are. You just wish that you could get to that point. You hate that your friends have to care for you like this, it makes you feel too fragile, like how omega’s use to be viewed. Poor pitiful things that weren’t allowed to do much more than have an alpha’s pups and care for them.

You’re roused from your daze by the door opening and closing and Jungkook’s warm, earthy scent washes over you. You hum in content and he rounds the couch with a grin as he lifts a bag up for you to see.

“I brought soup.”

You chuckle. “Thank you Kookie. Lisa made me eat before she left though, so you can put it in the kitchen for now and we can eat it later.”

He nods, taking it and your nearly empty glass from the table to the kitchen. He returns a few moments later with your cup, now refilled, and places it back on the coffee table. He plops down onto the couch next to you, slipping his arms around you to pull you closer to cuddle. You hum in contentment at his warmth, feeling the worst of your fog lift from the closeness.

“What’re we watching?” He murmurs.

You lift a shoulder in half a shrug. “Dunno. Lisa put it on. I’ve been too sleepy to really pay attention. You can put something else on if you want.”

Jungkook shifts, reaching for the remote and starts idly flipping through the channels to find something to watch and you feel your eyes getting heavy again as you listen to his heart beat. Jungkook’s perusing is interrupted by the frantic pounding from someone at your door. He frowns, glancing from the direction of the door to you.

“Are you expecting anyone?” When you shake your head, Jungkook adjusts you so he can get up. “I’ll be right back then.”

As he makes his way to the door, the knocking starts again and you frown, wondering who could be so insistent. Your friends are all at work or in class, with the exception of Jungkook who’s on babysitting duty. And you and Lisa rarely get unannounced visitors. It’s silent for a moment when Jungkook opens the door and it makes you worry enough to push yourself to your knees to glance over the back of the couch.

You’re about to call out to Jungkook, ask him what’s going on when Seokjin frantically rounds the corner and you feel like all your breath has been knocked out of you. Seokjin freezes when he sees you, his mouth dropping open, you don’t know if it’s from shock at how you look or if he also feels like all the air in the room has been sucked out. You vaguely register a door closing somewhere, you assume Jungkook must be leaving, but your focus is so taken by Seokjin that the building could fall around you and you wouldn’t notice.

You take a shuddering breath in and you’re overwhelmed with the scent of Seokjin, potent and real and the lingering scent left on his shirt is nothing compared to the richness of it as it fills the room. You choke on a sob and Seokjin is suddenly moving, crossing the distance between the two of you and enveloping you in a nearly crushing hug, but you can’t find it inside yourself to care how tightly he squeezes. You bury your face in his chest as tears leak from your eyes, feeling lighter and happier than you have in nearly 3 weeks. You hear Seokjin murmuring into your hair where his face is pressed against, but your body is buzzing too much for you to hear what the words are, only able to focus on how comforting the words feel on your frayed mind.

You don’t know how long the two of you stay like that, but eventually Seokjin pulls away. When you make a distressed sound, he strokes your cheek to sooth you.

“Shh, it’s okay. I’m not going anywhere. I just need to see your face.” With that, he finally sits fully on the couch, pulling you into his lap. His hands come up to cup your cheeks, holding you in place as his gaze flits across your face for a few moments, like he’s trying to memorize everything. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, princess.” He coos, pulling your face closer to pepper it with kisses.

You squeeze you eyes shut, willing yourself to stop crying, but your nerves have been so fried lately that you’re completely convinced that you’ll never stop crying. Seokjin continues to murmur to you, though the words themselves have lost all meaning and you just let the cadance and sound of his voice work as the balm your soul has needed these past few weeks. He pulls you back in and you bury your face back into neck to take in his scent, a small part of you fearful that you may never get to again.

Eventually, he adjusts your position, drawing your attention to the fact that when you look up, he’s saying your name with an incredibly fond smile.

“What?” You croak.

He chuckles and presses a kiss, two kisses to your cheek before responding. “I’ve been saying your name for a few minutes. You back with me, love?”

Your whole body heats at pet name. “You have?” You question, you can’t tell if he’s teasing or being serious.

He gives a little nod. “It’s okay. You seemed like you were enjoying yourself so I’m not too upset.”

The teasing tilt of his lips speaks of so much fondness, you can’t help it when you lean forward to steal a kiss of your own from him. “What were you saying my name for?” You murmur, reluctant to pull back from the kiss.

“I like saying it. It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard.” He grins.

You nudge him playfully, cheeks heating from a mixture of embarrassment and pleased happiness. “Stop that. That’s gross. What did you want?”

He tightens his arms around you briefly. “We should talk. There’s… kind of a lot that we need to go over huh?”

You sober slightly, but the thought of not touching Seokjin makes you feel physically ill again. You shift, keeping your legs throw over his and both hands wrapped in his. By the look on Seokjin’s face, this seems to be the furthest he’s willing to let you get from himself, not that you’d let yourself get much further from him anyway.

“We should.” You agree, nerves on edge. You assume, hope, that since he’s here, that he won’t let go of you, that this is meant to be a good talk. That it’ll end the way you want, that you both hopefully want.

“So… We’re mates.” He begins, stops, seems unsure of what else to go on, but your heart soars at him calling you mates. He seems a little uncomfortable and you find it incredibly endearing that a big powerful alpha and CEO can’t seem to get his feelings out to his mate. You decide to let him suffer a little longer with his stuttering before granting him mercy and taking over the conversation.

“We are. If you want to be. I… certainly wouldn’t be opposed to it.” You give him a shy smile.

Seokjin seems a little blindsided, but he quickly gets past it and his face lights up in a brilliant smile. “Of course. I can’t think of a more perfect girlfriend than you.”

You raise an eyebrow and you can’t help teasing him a little. “Girlfriend, huh?” Seokjin sputters, trying to come up with something but you laugh, putting a hand over his mouth. “I’m teasing. But I’m not going to be your girlfriend unless you ask me properly.”

He pulls you close again, lips barely brushing yours. “Will you,” He pauses, kisses you. “Be my girlfriend?” He finishes, lips still against yours.

You let out a giddy giggle. “Yes, of course, you silly alpha. My silly alpha.”

His thumbs run over your cheeks. “I’m sorry I let you get so sick. I should’ve realized. I shouldn’t have left. I’m so sorry.”

You shush him, putting your hands over his. “Hey, no. It’s just as much my fault as yours. Don’t blame yourself. You couldn’t have known. They were such strange circumstances. It’s okay. I don’t blame you Seokjin.”

He gives you a small grateful smile, like it’s something that’s been truly weighing on him before he seems to realize something and groans, head thumping back against the couch. You’re about to ask what’s wrong when he speaks. “Oh no, this means I just paid nearly a million dollars for a girlfriend. The guys are never going to let this go.”

You smother your laughter, tapping his nose to get his attention. “Well actually, you paid that much for your mate.” You give a mischievous wink to him. “But I’m sure you can convince her to share all that wealth with you again. Minus whatever she needs for school.”

His eyes darken. “Oh? Do you think she’d be that generous to give some back?”

You nod, tapping your chin thoughtfully. “Of course, if she has you now then she doesn’t really need that much money.”

Seokjin hums and it sends a shiver down your spine. He leans closer and you feel like you’re prey, you feel exhilarated. “And just what do you think I could do to convince her to do something like that, hm?” He purrs in your ear, finishing with a nip to your earlobe.

You shudder, biting back a moan. “Oh, I’m sure a smart man like you will think of something.” You laugh as you push yourself off his lap and make a dash for your room.

He lets out a noise of surprise before you hear the sound of pursuit and just as you reach your bedroom door, you’re scooped up by him and turned so he can pin your back to the wall. He grabs your thighs to force your legs around his waist and you delight in the press of his cock against you, even with all the layers separating it from where you want him most. You moan, head thumping back against the wall.

“Now now, princess. It’s not very nice to run away from your alpha now is it?” He chastises, breath warm against your neck.

You swallow, squirming to get a little friction and relief, but he pressed his hips more firmly against you, halting your movement. You whine, low and needy. Seokjin nips your neck.

“I believe I asked you something princess. It’s not nice to run away is it?” You shake your head and he nips you again. “Use your words like a good girl.”

“No, it’s not nice, alpha.”

He licks up your neck, nips your jaw, presses a quick kiss to your lips. “Good girl.”

You try to squirm again, whining. “Alpha, please. Need you. Missed you, Seokjin.” He rubs your sides comfortingly. “It’s okay princess, I’ll take care of you. Always.”

He pulls his hips away just enough to slip his hands into your shorts, fingers finding your dripping slit. He groans, lips finding yours as he slips two fingers into you. He pumps them a few times before you quickly grow restless, turning away just enough to speak.

“Not enough. Need your cock, please.”

He chuckles at your neediness and how much it mirrors his own and aquiesses easily enough to your request because he doesn’t think he could prolong this that much anyway. He pulls his fingers free, undoes his pants just enough to pull his dick out and then tugs your shorts and underwear to the side just enough to slip in. He slides in to the hilt and pauses there, panting.

“God you really were made for me.” He groans. “Fuck, I’m never letting you go again.”

You nod happily. “Yes, yes. Please move.”

He complies, starting a fast pace that leaves you feeling like this is your first time all over again with how overwhelming it is. You’re already remarkably close to cumming despite the fact that not much has been done and you have an inkling on what exactly will tip you over. You let your head drop to the side.

“Jinnie. Seokjin,” You wait till you have his attention. “Alpha claim me.”

His eyes flash and there’s no hesitation as he dips his head down to pepper your neck with kisses. A moment later, you feel teeth and then the wetness of blood as he pierces skin. You gasp, back bowing as everything becomes more intense and the feeling of Seokjin’s tongue as he cleans the blood from your claiming mark is the last little push you need to push you over the edge.

You shudder, moaning his name and fingers gripping his shirt tight enough that you feel it rip. Seokjin slows his thrusting to let you ride out your orgasm and once he senses that your not too sensitive, he resumes his fast pace, chancing his own high. You feel exhausted but the unmarked skin of his neck is like a magnet and you gather what strength you’ve got left to sink your teeth into his skin to leave your own claiming mark.

Seokjin growls at this, getting a couple last rough thrusts before he cums, shuddering under your hands as you lick the blood from his neck and a moment later you feel his knot. Your head drops back against the wall and you groan weakly, hips rocking slightly as you stare dazedly at the way your mark stands out against Seokjin’s skin, feeling whole and content. His head rests against your shoulder, breath puffing against your collarbone as he struggles to catch his breath.

Your blissful bubble is burst a few minutes later when you hear the front door open. “Y/n!” Lisa calls and she sounds distracted, Jungkook must not have informed her that Seokjin came by. Your mind is lagging too much to connect that this is about to be bad if you don’t respond. “I know you told me to go to class and I did… Well one class. But I was worried, and nothing against Jungkook, but I’d just feel better if I were the one watching-” She cuts off abruptly as you hear something drop to the ground. “Jesus fucking Christ!” You glance over, body flushing in embarrassment at not even having been able to make it to your room. Lisa has her hands over her eyes and body turned away, backpack lying on the ground at her feet. “Really! You couldn’t have like, I don’t know, fucking warned me? Jesus, gross. I think I’m scarred for life now.” There’s a heavy pause before Lisa snatches her phone out of her pocket and storms off. “I’m going to fucking kill Jungkook. The little fucker could’ve texted me. He’s so dead.”

Seokjin’s shoulders shake beneath your hands and you look back to him to see him struggling to hold back laughter. You bite your lip, his laughter making you want to laugh. You poke him. “Shh, Lisa will kill you.” You whisper, little snickers escaping as you.

He looks up at you, eyes sparkling with joy. You can’t resist the urge to lean down and peck him on the lips. He grins before he adjusts his grip on you and moves you both carefully to your room.

“We’ll text you when we’re decent and it’s safe to come back Lis!” You call as Seokjin giggles.

“Pass! Think I’m just going to move out! It’s not safe here anymore!” You hear her call back a second before you hear the front door slam.

You and Seokjin both finally dissolve into laughter as he closes the bedroom door. He sits gently on the edge of your bed and gives you an apologetic smile when you squirm slightly in his lap.

“Sorry about knotting you. I… I couldn’t really stop it after you bit me.”

You run your hands through his hair affectionately. “It’s more than ok, babe.”

His eyes flutter closed, leaning into your touch as he hums. “Careful princess, or it’ll happen again.”

You grin, grip tightening slightly. “I certainly hope it happens a whole lot more, boyfriend.” You tease.

~8 Months Later~

You shrug the black robe on over your dress, adjusting it so it lays properly. The dress is new and you’re excited for Seokjin to see it, you refused to let him come with you to get, instead choosing to make the shopping trip a girls day with Lisa and the others. You stare at yourself in the mirror for a moment before there’s a knock and then Lisa’s opening the door, her own robe on. She grins as she lifts her cap.

“You ready?”

You grin back, excited that the year is over and even more excited for what’s to come. You grab your own cap off the dresser and follow her out to put your shoes on.

“Is Seokjin meeting us beforehand?” She questions, straightening up.

“No, he said that he’d meet us after the ceremony. He knows how hectic it is beforehand and said that we could have the time to just ourselves.”

She nods and you leave, joining your fellow students headed to graduation.

“Y/n!” You turn just as Jimin’s arms wrap around your middle and he lifts and twirls you with glee. “We did it! We’re college grads!” He crows with delight.

You giggle and slap at his shoulder. “I’m aware! Put me down! I’m unsteady enough in these shoes!”

His spinning slows to a stop but you remain held aloft. You squirm, glancing down to see the faux pout on his face, ruined by the smile he clearly can’t keep away. You raise an eyebrow after catching movement behind him.

“I’d put me down if I were you.” You smirk.

“What’re you gonna do about it?” He taunts.

You tap your chin thoughtfully for a moment before shrugging. “I won’t do anything.” A flash of confusion colors his expression but before he can pose any sort of question, you continue. “But Taehyung certainly can.”

As soon as the name leaves your lips, Jimin’s expression falls, eyes widening in panic. He doesn’t get so much as a word out before fingers dig into his sides and he lets out a startled yelp, finally dropping you. And you’re positive you’d have fallen on your ass if Lisa hadn’t also been with Taehyung and is there to steady you when you were finally freed. You shoot her a grateful smile as you watch Taehyung’s merciless tickling of Jimin, the two rolling on the ground.

“Well at least they don’t need the robes anymore.” Jennie snarks, also joining the two of you in watching.

The rest of your friends slowly join in watching the two wrestle, finally being able to part from family so that you all could be together on such a momentous day. A few moments later, you feel a tug in your chest and you whip your head around, scanning the crowd a second before Seokjin appears with a grin and call of your name. You see Yoongi, Namjoon, and Hoseok trailing along with him. You abandon the conversation with your friends in favor of meeting him halfway, flinging your arms around his neck as you beam.

He gives you a quick peck. “I’m so proud of you.” He murmurs, one arm snaking around your waist.

When the other doesn’t join it, you frown and pull away slightly, following his arm to where it remains tucked behind his back. You pout. “This seems like an inadequate proud greeting.”

He chuckles, pulling his arm out from behind him and presenting the flowers he was hiding to you in a flourish. “That’s because I had a surprise.”

Taking them, you hold them close to smell, marveling at their beauty before giving Seokjin a kiss of your own. “Thank you.”

“You two are gross. Can you not in public?” Yoongi grouses from beside you, but you know it holds no heat.

“That doesn’t sound like a good way to be introduced to my friends, mister.” You snark back, sharing a conspiratory look with Seokjin.

“I can’t believe it’s taken so long for you to introduce all of us.” Hoseok chimes in as you begin to make your way back to rejoin your friends.

“We were busy, had to finish college and you guys have a business. And schedules just never really worked out. Plus Hoseok, you actually already know Jimin.”

Hoseok perks up at that. “The dance student Jimin, right? He’s your friend? Wow, small world.”

“Hey guys!” You announce, waiting to have your friends attention. “These are Seokjin’s friends, Hoseok, Namjoon and Yoongi. Guys these are all my friends.”

Everyone starts talking over each other then to introduce themselves and share stories and you grin, nudging Seokjin. When he looks at you, you nod your head towards where Yoongi stands frozen. Frozen, and staring at Jimin.

Jimin appears to be completely oblivious to the alpha currently staring him down, instead, he’s busy regaling the others of a story from one of Hoseok’s dance classes. Seokjin goes to say something but you hold up a hand to halt him. He gives you a questioning look but you wave him off. You move around the group till you reach Jimin, now finished with his story and you lean in to whisper in his ear, pointedly looking towards Yoongi when Jimin gives you a wide eyed look. He sheepishly follows your glance, quickly looking away when his eyes meet Yoongi’s intense stare, cheeks quickly heating.

You give him a kiss on the cheek and a wink as you move back to Seokjin, who wraps an arm around you.

“You didn’t talk for long, are you sure that’ll be enough?” He questions.

You observe Jimin for a moment, who’s talking to Taehyung but you see his eyes darting to Yoongi every so often. You grin. “I did just enough. Give it a second.” You give Seokjin a wry look. “Are you doubting me?”

He kisses your forehead. “Doubt you, love? Never.”

A moment later, your prediction proves right as you see Jimin say something to Tae before he’s shyly making his way over to Yoongi. You want to laugh because you’ve never seen Jimin be genuinely shy around an alpha a day in your life. Maybe you should get a picture so you can tease him later, payback for all the teasing you got over Seokjin.

You turn to Seokjin. “See? Told you.”

He hums, other arm coming up to join the first. “I do. I should never doubt you.”

You smile fondly as the two start talking, it’s stilted and awkward but you know they’ll get going on their own soon enough. You and Seokjin had taken a little while to realize that the omega that Yoongi was hung up on was Jimin. It wasn’t until Hoseok had guest taught again and Yoongi went with, with the excuse that he wanted Hoseok to use one of his songs for the dance and he wanted to see what the dancers came up with, and Yoongi mentioned the omega who ignored him again was there. He was vague on details, but Hoseok had gushed happily about one of the students in the class and how amazing they were. You’d asked their name and he’d told you Jimin.

When you’d asked Jimin about the class, he’d revealed that besides him, the only other omegas in that class were women. When you’d told Seokjin that Yoongi was pining over your friend, you got genuinely worried that he hurt himself with hard he was laughing. You asked about setting them up or setting up a group meeting to let them meet in a place where Jimin isn’t in dance mode, but Seokjin said no. When you pressed he said that letting Yoongi pine a little would let you both see if he was serious or if he was just infatuated because Jimin ignored him once.

You think they’re also mates and that the only reason they haven’t realized yet is that they’ve only met in the dance studios, a place that’s overwhelming in the mix of scents that it’s nigh impossible to pick out individual ones. So you’d agreed to wait until graduation to introduce them, which meant that all of your friends had to wait to meet the others otherwise it would have never been fair to Jimin. You’re a little glad you did because the way Jimin is glowing while talking to Yoongi tells you that they’re gonna be fine.

You look up at Seokjin. “Now, as much as I love my friends. I’d much rather we go celebrate alone before they invade your apartment to party.” You grin.

“That doesn’t seem like a very nice thing to do.”

You quirk an eyebrow. “Oh?” You fiddle with the zipper on your robe. “So you don’t wanna see the dress I bought alone first?” You tsk in mock disappointment. “And here I thought you’d want to. You were so sad that I wouldn’t show you.”

He swallows, gaze dipping to stare at your fingers and what you might be hiding beneath the robe. “I…”

You tug it down just enough for him to get a good eyeful of your cleavage. “It’s blue you know.” You smile sweetly. “I figured since it’s your favorite color…” You give a small shrug as you trail off, starting to turn back to your friends.

You feel Seokjin’s growl against your chest and grin in victory seconds before he’s hauling you away from your friends.

#ksmutclub #kwritersworldnet #btsguild #bangtanarmynet #hyunglinenetwork #thekimlinenet #bts x reader #seokjin x reader #jin x reader #bts smut #seokjin smut #jin smut #bts fanfic #seokjin fanfic #jin fanfic #bts au #abo dynamics #uhhhhh #sorry for the length?

4K notes · View notes

whentheynameyoujoy · 3 years

Text

So the ATLA Movie Is... Good, Actually?

Just kidding, of course it’s not, it’s so bad it sucked the paint off my walls. But after ten years of people pointing out its glaring flaws, why would anyone bother talking about this garbage heap if not to go the other direction? So here’s a very brief and very superficial list of things the movie does get kinda... not atrociously wrong.

And they won’t be fake hipster pokes, like “It’s fun to laugh at”, “The Rifftrax for this is OK”, or “Kudos to the actress for managing to say we believe in our beliefs as much as they believe in theirs with a straight face”.

(though now that I mentioned it, it is fun to laugh at, the Rifftrax for this is OK, and massive props indeed.)

Rasta Iroh

Yes, I know it’s not exactly the aesthetic of the real Iroh or that it makes no cultural sense for him to sport this do when no one else in the racebended Indian “OMFG what were you thinking Shyamalan” Nation does but goddamn, long-haired dudes are my one mortal weakness and I will ogle the hell out of him.

Jesus is that a man bun I see that’s it mum I’ve been deaded

Yue’s hair

No.

Now we’re talking. Yue’s hair turned white when the Moon spirit gave her life, so it makes sense for it to go black again when she sacrifices herself to revive the koi fish. It’s a neat detail I find myself expecting whenever I rewatch the scene in the show. Yes, I realize it’d be a pointless hassle to animate since she, unlike in the movie, immediately goes on to become the Moon herself but still. I like.

The Blue Spirit’s mop

Zuko, hun, what’s with the dance-off?

First of all, I want to imagine that Zuko the Theatre Nerd was about to leave his ship with just the mask like in the show but then stuck his head into the cleaning cupboard and went, “Yeah, more coverage might be good, even though it do seem mighty fried to shit”.

Which makes me giggle. I like to giggle.

And secondly, the hair’s movement is what makes the static mess of the Blue Spirit’s solo fight scene appear at least bit more dynamic because God knows the cinematography isn’t doing it.

Any particular reason why it’s at the edge of the action, shot all boring-like?

Now, I get why circular shots would be reserved for Aang while he’s in the practice area and then used once the two join forces. What I don’t get is why Aang’s part of the action scene has a defined visual style while Zuko’s delegated to a few stationary wide shots from afar as though he’s a tertiary goon, meaning that when the time comes to combine the respective pieces of cinema language and visually convey collaboration, there’s not really much to combine.

But as long as Zuko is stuck in this static mess, it’s that awesome disaster on his head flopping about that draws the eye, helping me understand that something even is going on over there.

It also prevents me from paying much attention to how the extras are mostly just staying put and a lot of the hits don’t land, so that’s good.

The music slaps

James Newton Howard is too good for this.

youtube

Pls ignore that the word “gods” is used in the ATLA universe

I can’t be the only one who constantly uses this piece to daydream about writing specific fanfic scenes instead of, you know, actually sitting down and writing them. It’s just so good at communicating a sense of sorrow while speaking of rebirth that I find myself getting misty-eyed whenever I listen to it. Unfailingly, the soundtrack as a whole manages to break through the mile-thick crust of horrible acting, confusing writing, and uninspired cinematography and make me feel things. And considering how everything on screen is working against it, that’s no small feat.

Imagine what a powerful experience it would be if the score was used in service of an actual movie.

Dev Patel

No wonder since he’s the only one in the film occupying that crucial intersection between “is a good actor” and “was given something to work with”. It also doesn’t hurt that he breaks with the trend of actors starring in martial arts flicks despite never having done any martial art.

And all EIP-jokes about “stiff and humorless” aside, he’s a pretty decent Zuko considering how abridged this version of the character is. A while ago, I remember hearing a reviewer say that with his comedic chops, Patel should have been cast as Sokka. And on one hand, yes, god, absolutely, I need to see that asap. But on the other? He captures all layers of Book 1!Zuko, the desperate obsession, rage, and self-loathing, and at the same time gives you a peek at the soft momma’s boy dork that’s buried underneath. For Christ sakes, he exudes intensity and ambivalence even when acting against an emotionless hunk of wood that’s giving him nothing in return.

Oh, and I guess there’s a tree in the frame.

Ba dum tss

What can I say, the guy’s good.

Showing vs telling

OK, so this movie is all tell and no show, except for one single moment. And it’s the exact moment where the original goes in the other direction in terms of how information is conveyed.

See, I never liked this. The revelation is preceded by Iroh giving advice to Zuko who scolds him for nagging. Iroh then apologizes, moves in to say the line above, and is interrupted by Zuko who seems rather uncomfortable with Iroh laying his feelings out like this. And once they’re out, Zuko verbally confirms that he knew already and Iroh didn’t need to bother.

All this extraneous information and pussyfooting ends up weakening what should be a profound scene that reveals to us, the viewers, how deep the relationship between these two in fact runs.

Compare to the movie where Dadroh acts like a parent by fussing and worrying, with Sonion needing a single look to tell him and us that he understands what it’s all really about.

It’s genuinely efficient and just good.

No Cataang

Fine, a bit mean-girl bitchy from me since I only start minding the ship in Book 3. And probably unintentional on the part of the creators since there are moments where I think they’re trying to set the romance up? There’s a, well, an attempt to recreate the famous introductory shot of fateful meaningful destiny of meaningness, there’s some slight note of saving each other’s bacon going on, I’m pretty sure they’re the only ones in the film who smile, and oh, right, Katara’s shoved into her post-canon useless role where she doesn’t ever do anything, and is all about Aang right from the get go.

Yes, I will blame the “executive producers” because a) I’m incredibly petty, and b) it’s perfectly in line with their vision of the character so why the hell not.

Hilariously, none of it reads on screen because the actors are just... yeah. These poor kids are struggling so much with delivering their own lines and portraying their own characters they don’t seem to have any strength left to create something between them. To be fair, the bare-bones shot-reverse shot style of their scenes doesn’t exactly lend itself to the idea they occupy the same universe, let alone are friends or each other’s crushes.

And I enjoy this immensely because it allows me to forget the depressing horror show Katara’s life turns into post ATLA.

Yes Zutara

I need to delve into this because it’s fucking hilarious. So in a movie which fails to establish the original’s central romance so spectacularly that if Aang got lost in a crowd I don’t believe Katara would notice, SomEOnE thought it’d be a good idea to add an utterly unnecessary non-canon moment where Zuko for some reason feels the need to pause his character-defining hunt for the Avatar which otherwise has him ignore everything and snap at everyone, and explain his central conflict to an unconscious peasant he doesn’t know, complete with gently pushing the hair from the pretty girl’s the soulmate’s the Water Tribe Ambassador’s the Fire Lady’s the love of his life’s her face away, AFTER his uncle nagged him twice to find a girl and settle down.

I just wanted to make sure we’re all on the same page and this is what we really saw.

Celibate Avatars

I have no idea why the decision was made, if TPTB thought expecting viewers to understand the story through the lens of Buddhism would be too much, or if the “executive producers” already worked their retconny magic. What I do know, however, is that there’s a big shift in worldbuilding and Aang’s struggle with his role as the Avatar stops being a personal conflict defined by a) his grief for Air Nomads, b) his notion of being robbed of the loved ones in his life, and c) the selfish attachment to Katara he confuses with true love. Instead, what he has a difficulty to accept is apparently a general notion of who Avatars are supposed to be, i.e. a fantasy version of Catholic monks, no family and worldly relations, period.

I guess either someone understood the original’s portrayal of de/attachment as “hermit no freaky”, or thought the audience would so why not go there outright.

Now, do I like this on its own? No, God no, it makes the world infinitely poorer and changes the story from an exploration of ideas which aren’t all that ingrained in the West, to a cliché tropester about a Catholic priest going Protestant so that he could be with a girl.

At least I assume that’s where they were going to take this eventually.

I mean, I think the direction was “look conflicted, this isn’t the final stage of your journey”?

But consider this—the show went there, it built on the concepts of Eastern philosophy and touched upon the ideas of spiritual awakening, only to swerve in the end and strongly imply they’re bullshit and Aang should have never wasted his time with them.

So honestly, I much prefer scanty worldbuilding to an insulting retcon by a damn rock.

Multiracial Air Nomads

Probably the most substantial “no hint of irony” point on this list and a genuinely good addition to the universe’s worldbuilding.

See, the notion of the elemental nations being perfectly separate and never mingling before Sozin has always been sketchy but it’s especially ridiculous in the case of airbenders. It never made sense to me for all airbenders to be Air Nomads and for all Air Nomads to be monks and for all monks to be chilling at the temples all the time to facilitate a quick everyone-dies genocide should an imperialistic warlord ever decide to commit one.

Because committing everyone to a single way of life at a handful of places kinda goes against the central philosophy behind airbending. Like the freedom and nomadism part.

Instead, there should be more variety to the airbending culture, with some staying at the temples as monks, hermits, and teachers while others live as nomads, travelling the world and creating more airbenders, with the resulting children in turn being influenced by the non-airbending cultures they grew up in.

And thus, not only should airbenders not be modeled after a single culture to create a one-size-fits-all lifestyle, but they should have the most diverse and dynamic culture out of the four nations.

And it’d be precisely this diversity which would pave way for an eventual reveal that some of them survived, that their complete extermination is impossible.

Because they’re everywhere.

You know.

Like air.

#atla #atla movie #zutara #anti bryke #dev patel #the last airbender #anti-kataang

172 notes · View notes

certifiedskywalker · 4 years

Text

Hopes and Dreams - Din Djarin (The Mandalorian)

80s90steen

The Mandalorian x reader. She’s literally a pure angel and they’re in love with each other. She holds the baby and he says mama and inside his helmet he’s thinking about marrying her.

AN: Fem!Reader

Din didn’t know much about relationships, but he understood that stability planned a crucial role in maintaining them. A state of consistent contact needed to be established; something that, with Din’s lifestyle, was difficult to foster. He only had a few scattered allies in the galaxy. A few were just enough for him. Or, so he thought.

Then Din met you and everything changed. Family was something he had never thought about before, never even considered. Then you came into his life, opening his eyes to a solar system’s worth of possibility. Well, you and the Child.

“Do you think he has a name?” Your voice was sweet with the question and heavy with thought. Yet not even your voice was as sweet as the scene that met Din’s eyes when he turned in the pilot’s chair. You had moved the Child’s ship-seat to sit there yourself. In your lap, the little green creature played with your fingers.

Din struggled to find his voice. In the silence, you looked up and peered at him. It felt like, somehow, you could see past the mask. Exposed, Din managed to piece some words together. Even after knowing you, loving you, you still managed to take his breath away.

“I don’t know, maybe.”

“He must have one,” you wondered aloud, “whoever his parents ar-were, they had him for fifty years.” Din nodded and turned back to the console. He set a course to yet another Outer Rim world and let autopilot take control.

“Probably,” Din agreed. He stood up from the chair and turned to watch you once more. You were smiling at the Child who, squealing, began climbing up your chest. His little fingers curled into the material of your jacket as his climb turned more into a strange embrace.

Din shook his head at the sight. Still grinning, you met the eyes of his mask and stood. The Child was grasping tightly to you; like an Ewok to a redwood tree. You shifted a bit, trying to worm your way to a better position to direct the Child’s climb. But the creature kept going, giving you no chance to get a tighter hold on him.

“Here,” Din reached towards you, “come to me, little one.”

Carefully, Din plucked the Child from your chest. A small whimper fell from its lips as Din took him in his arms. You frowned and fixed your clothes from where the Child had dug in its claws. Even with messed attire, Din couldn’t take his eyes off you. He was thankful that you couldn’t see through the dark viewplate.

“Mmma,” the Child cooed. You looked up and smiled.

“What is it?” Your eyes widened suddenly, making Din smile. “Are you trying to tell us your name?”

“Mmaa,” the Child looked from you to Din.

“Does that mean anything in Mando’a?”

“Not that I know of,” Din replied as he lifted the Child to meet his eyes.

You leaned in close. So close that Din could feel the heat from your skin and smell the soap you bought from a trader on Tatooine. Sweet Bantha milk and desert plum; staple scents of the sand-planet aside from sweat and desperation.

Din watched as you reached out towards the Child. Your thumbs brushed against his green cheeks, eliciting a giggle from the creature. A similar laugh fell from your lips. Din felt his chest tighten at the sound. He longed to hear you laugh more often.

“You’re good with him,” he said.

His voice brought your gaze to the helmet. Your eyes were soft, light with a gentleness Din thought never existed. However, you had shown him that even in this galaxy full of darkness, there was always something bright to hold on to. For Din, you were his bright thing and he wanted to hold you as tight as he could.

“No better than you are,” you replied, lifting a free hand to the side of Din’s helmet. Maker, he needed to take it off. He needed to feel your skin on his.

Almost as if he were jealous that your attention was elsewhere, the Child reached for your arm. With its little hands, he pulled on your sleeve and your hand fell from Din’s helmet. Dark, squinted eyes met Din’s then the Child turned its pointed gaze on you. A whimper fell from its small mouth and it reached out towards your face.

“Mmm-mama.”

Your eyes widened. “Did he just…”

“Mamaaa,” the Child cried out. He began waving his little fists in the air and Din let out a scoff. Extending his arms, Din handed you the Child.

“He did,” Din sighed.

You took the green creature up in your arms, cradling it as if it weren’t half a century old. With his now free hands, Din pushed up on his helmet. The cool air of the Razor Crest hit his face and Din took in the sight of you without the shades of tactical red of his visor. How refreshing, relieving it was to see you; truly see you.

“Hello there,” you teased, meeting Din’s dark eyes. The Mandalorian felt a smile tug at his lips. The feeling of joy in his chest only intensified as you stepped towards him and leaned up on your tippy-toes. Your lips brushed against Din’s before he, not able to help himself, captured them in a full kiss.

His gloved hand reached up and cupped your cheek. The rough fabric tickled your sensitive skin and sent shivers down your spine. For a moment, Din swore he felt it too. That near-electric jolt from your body to his. It was like you were one. It was a feeling so real that it made Din’s stomach twist.

Then it felt like he was being pushed away. Din’s lips parted from your own and he opened his eyes. Immediately, his gaze fell on the Child who held out a splayed palm. Din wasn’t entirely sure what the Child’s powers were, but whatever it was doing was alarmingly strong. You shook your head at the creature and shot Din an apologetic look.

“I’m going to get him to bed.”

“Mama,” the Child repeated, bringing your eyes to his.

“Yeah, I’ll be-”

“Mama.”

“Alright, alright,” you sighed. Before you walked off, you leaned up once more and peck Din’s cheek. “I’ll be with you soon.”

Din hummed lightly and watched you walk towards the ladder that led down into the hull of the Razor Crest. He watched the top of your head disappear before he began to shed his beskar. First, his shin guards, then chest plate, followed by shoulder pauldrons and, finally, his gloves. Weight literally fell from his body and all he could think about was you.

You and the Child and him. What kind of life could the three of you have on the run? Would it be like this, these stolen moments between fueling stops and bounties? Din cherished this time; it was so easy to forget about the reality that awaited you all.

Din slumped in the passenger seat as he thought. He rubbed his scruffy chin and sighed. All he wanted was to keep you and the boy safe. It grew harder to do that with each planet you stopped on; whether the system was under the New Republic or not. Din only hoped that, soon, any remanents of the Empire would flicker out entirely.

“What are you thinking about?” Your voice was like meiloorun nectar in his ear; sweet and full. “It’s dangerous, you know.”

Din looked up from where you stood behind him. “Is he asleep?”

You nodded in reply and gave Din’s shoulders a tender squeeze. He watched as you moved from behind to in front of him. Instinctually, Din scooted up in the seat and you smiled; he knew that smile, loved that smile. You wore it as you moved to straddle his lap and Din’s hands immediately went to your hips to hold you as close to him as possible.

“He spoke,” you said softly as you rested your arms on the chair’s headrest. “Well, a little, anyway.”

“He got jealous too,” Din pointed out curtly. You beamed and moved one of your hands to brush against the side of his face.

“Maybe you did too, huh?” Din fought a scoff and pressed his face into the meat of your palm. You smiled and Din met your gaze once more.

“No.” There was an edge of humor in his voice that told you it was a lie. Din had never been good a lying; especially to you.

“Uh-huh, I see,” you leaned towards him, “then what were you thinking about?”

“You,” he whispered softly, “and the little one. About what to do.”

Your brow furrowed. “What to do?”

“We can’t keep running,” Din admitted, “we’ll run out of supplies, land, get hunted, fight...get hurt. Then we’ll run again.”

“And get tired,” you agreed. You rubbed your thumb along the peak of Din’s cheekbone. “Are you saying you want to settle down?”

Din gave you and sheepish smile; an expression rare for him and Mandalorians in general. You remembered then, what he had told you the first time you asked about his armor.

“Once we take it off, we can’t put it back on,” he had said. Although, when he did eventually take it off, Din put it back on without second thought. He had put his love for you and the Child before those who saved him. But maybe that Mandalorian teaching was still ingrained in his mind. Maybe he felt guilty.

“With that womp rat, I don’t think we could settle down,” Din sighed lightheartedly. You bit your bottom lips to hide your smile. Din lifted a careful hand and pulled the flesh free. He traced the tip of his thumb along your now-flush bottom lip. He was looking to distract himself in you and it was much too easy.

“Din, I can’t speak for the Child, but I would never want to keep you from your work.”

Work, bounty hunting. Din hadn’t collected a proper bounty since you both had picked up the one set on the Child. The little green creature had done more than break down his walls; he made Din realize that there was so much more he wanted. That included you.

“You’re more important,” richer than any bounty, Din wanted to add, but he bit his tongue. He leaned forward and rested his forehead against yours. He took a grounding breath and you melted into his warmth. “We are one…”

“Din-”

“Together or apart,” Din pulled his head from yours as he recited the words he had heard said only once before. Vows, Mandalorian, but still as true to him as your love. Sensing what he meant, you started to nod. Your hand on his cheek pulled his lips back to yours.

We will share everything, Din thought, completing the vows. Everything: your worries, your love, your hopes and dreams. Even the dreams Din didn’t know he had before he fell in love with you.

3K notes · View notes

norahastuff · 3 years

Text

Another thing about 5x16 that I didn’t mention in the last post, is the romanticisation of Mary. S12 does a lot of work in tearing down the perfect sainted mother image, but the seeds of that are there in this episode. I mean the ideal of Mary hasn’t been torn down yet (though finding out she was a hunter who made a demon deal did put a dent in it) but one thing that is addressed is the myth that John and Mary were this perfect, perpetually happy couple.

SAM: Dad always said they had the perfect marriage.

DEAN: It wasn’t perfect until after she died

And neither was Mary. The things Dean thinks he knew about her, how much of that was his own unreliable memories and how much was John painting a sanitised picture of the woman that she was? I mean finding Mary’s killer became John’s crusade so it’s no wonder that he turned her into a saint, which she really wasn’t. Believing that was part of what messed up Dean’s perceptions of relationships and what he expected of the people he loved, lest we forget that one leviathan pretending to be Dean’s astute observation that he “doesn't have relationships. No, he has applications for sainthood.”

This was in s7, and was a big part of why the most recent tragedy he’s just gone through, Cas/Godstiel/Leviathans, has shaken him so much. Sure losing Cas hurt, but it’s also the guilt at not being able to see what was really going on with him and not being able to save him that’s eating away at him. And why couldn’t he see that? Because Cas occupied a certain role in his mind. Despite their fighting and feeling like he was being abandoned by Cas throughout s6, ultimately Cas was still the larger than life badass hero who turned his back on heaven and everything he believed in to fight by Dean’s side and help save the world, and when Cas was knocked off that pedestal Dean had him on, it shook his worldview so profoundly but was ultimately a good thing, because it laid the foundation for Dean being able to see Cas a person. A flawed real person who was just trying to do his best, and that was what led to them being able to develop a very different kind of relationship, one that was on much more equal footing than what they’d had before.

The same is true for Dean and Mary in s12. That’s why Amara brings Mary back to life. In Dean’s eyes Mary has been this sainted figure, this martyr and yet also someone whose death took away his innocence and forced him to give up on his own needs and happiness because he had to step into her role after she died. So there was always this weird dichotomy of “she’s perfect and good and I will never live up to that kind of perfection” as well as “I’m angry at her for leaving me to pick up all the pieces and having to give up my sense of self” which undoubtedly led to even more confusion for Dean, because how do you resent a saint? Honestly Bobo did such a good job writing that Dean and Mary confrontation in 12x22, it was an arc that had to pay off years of character development and managed to do it so well, so kudos to him on that.

Mary’s real and not perfect, and yet Dean loves her anyway. It means that unattainable goal of perfection Dean always hated himself for not being able to reach...well maybe he didn’t have to. Things weren’t black and white, people weren’t just saints or sinners.

Also the whole “Sam thinking Mary and John had the perfect marriage because of stories he’d heard” thing brings up the of idea of preserving your kids innocence out of love. Sam has a lot of different stories and ideas about his childhood and history, some told by John and never corrected by Dean, because Dean wanted Sam to be a kid as long as he could and if he could protect Sam in any way, he would.

It’s something that comes up over and over again, and not just with Sam and Dean. How about in 10x20 when Dean sees how hurt and upset Claire still is with Cas? Dean defends him and tells her because of her father’s sacrifice “Cas was able to save the world. The world.” That’s not the whole truth, Cas definitely helped but Dean made it sound like he did it alone, because that’s how he wanted Claire to see Cas, and to understand him (also the original line was that Cas helped save the world, but Jensen being Jensen knew Dean would talk Cas up more than that.)

I was going to say Sam does it too with Jack, but that one is a little complicated. When he’s trying to bond with Jack by telling him about his own struggles with morality and demon blood, he talks about how his family, Dean and Cas, were there for him. I mean arguably that’s not true at all if you take s4 in to account, Cas was being brainwashed by heaven into actually encouraging Sam’s addiction and descent, but then he is there for Sam in s5. But Sam’s not about to tell Jack about how Cas was a flawed person with a complicated history. In fact at the start of s13, Cas is essentially in the s1 Mary role. He’s the perfect untouchable martyr, his death broke Dean (and also led to Dean whitewashing a lot of the reasons behind what actually caused Cas’ death) and left a profound hole in Jack’s life.

But luckily this wasn’t s1. Cas didn’t stay the idealised martyr, he was brought back.

Oh and Cas has done the “whitewash the truth for your son” thing multiple times the most significant is the one I remember a lot of people were angry about back when 14x02 aired, in which Cas tells Jack about when he was human “I had Sam and Dean. But I had something else that was extremely helpful. I had myself. Just the basic me, as, uh...as Dean would say, without all the bells and whistles.”

Some people were annoyed that Cas said he had Sam and Dean, because Dean had kicked him out of the bunker and he was left to fend for himself. Thing is there were extenuating circumstances which Dean repeatedly apologised for and which Cas understood and forgave. Besides he did have them. Dean tried to protect him from the angels. He told him to go to the bunker. They saved him from the reaper. Dean saved him from the angel who tried to kill him. So sure, despite all that, Dean did leave him out on his own but again, Cas isn’t going to reveal all that messy hurtful history to Jack. He wants to protect him and for him to see the best in Dean. It’s what parents do.

Thing is, unlike John, Sam, Dean and Cas didn’t tell any of those somewhat edited truths in order to get Claire or Jack to join their revenge missions or enable their crusades, they did it because that’s what they knew was best for them in that moment and because it’s what they needed to hear.

Anyway, the point is that Dark Side of the Moon is such a crucial episode for Sam, Dean and Cas and I love how much of the characters’ core traits and struggles it manages to address in such a nuanced way (see also Sam and Dean’s relationship as well as Dean and Cas’ individual relationships with faith as well as their joint relationship with it.)

#spn rewatch #5x16 #my spn thoughts #long post for ts #spn meta #this episode gets me ok?#spn

69 notes · View notes

dangerouscommiesubversive · 3 years

Note

Hi! I’d like to request #17, with Philip and Chase (and bonus Shoutarou with another Drive character, if you like). I just have this need for Philip to interact with all my favorite characters, and your W crossovers are delightful. ^_^

17. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Really, Shoutaro thinks, it shows a lot of restraint from Philip that he managed to wait a full week after discovering that Roidmudes were back in the world before he insisted on meeting one. Not that he’s unrestrained, of course. In fact, he’s gotten a lot better over the years about not overwhelming people with his academic enthusiasm. But there’s academic enthusiasm, and then there’s his increasing interest in the various unusual friends their junior Riders have picked up. He’d been practically vibrating with excitement since he first heard that Dr. Sawagami had run successful preliminary trials in her project to bring back the Roidmudes.

Of course, Philip could ask to speak with one or more Roidmudes all he liked, it had taken some time to arrange it. They’d had to talk to Terui, and he’d called Drive, and Drive had spoken to the four now-living Roidmudes, and then it had still taken two more months after that before anything could be scheduled just due to the tremendous problems Drive’s friends were having getting the Roidmudes legal status.

Now, though, the day's come, and Philip is enthusiastically shaking the hand of a man so color-coordinated that he could put Terui to shame and saying, "It's a absolute pleasure to meet you, Mr. Chase, thank you for coming, I appreciate it. Would you like coffee? I don’t know if you eat.”

Chase stares at him for only a very brief moment before saying, “Thank you, I do not drink coffee.”

Next to Chase--towering over him, in fact over all of them--is a man in a red coat with a thoughtful look on his face, and Shoutaro has to think for a moment before he recalls the last few messages he’d gotten. “And you’re...Heart, right? I’m Hidari Shoutaro, and this is Philip.”

Philip blinks. “This isn’t Mach? I thought Shijima Gou would be accompanying Chase to Fuuto. Shoutaro, I’m sorry, did I forget to introduce you?”

“It’s all right, partner, you were pretty excited. No, you remember the email, Gou was tied up with something last-minute.”

“By which he means he forgot that Professor Harley was going to be in Japan and expecting to see him.” Heart smiles, although he’s watching Philip with something that might be suspicion. “So I volunteered to come along, I’m always interested in making new friends.”

Chase glances at him. “You are overprotective.”

Heart makes a hm noise that doesn’t sound entirely like disagreement.

“Heart, Heart...” Philip’s eyes light up. “Yes, you’re also a Roidmude! Terui had said you weren’t interested in being interviewed, I don’t suppose you’ve had a change of heart? Forgive me, that wasn’t intended to be a play on words.”

Heart wavers for a moment, and Shoutaro can’t quite figure out whether it’s due to shyness or actual discomfort, so it’s probably fortunate that Chase is the one who answers. “Heart is not comfortable with discussing the past.”

“Ah. Yes, I entirely understand. Would you like coffee?”

“Now who’s overprotective?” But Heart relaxes visibly. “Yes, coffee would be wonderful, thank you.”

"Terui Ryuu said you and the other Roidmudes were having difficulties with your legal status, do you mind if I ask what they were? I know there are existing procedures for establishing the legal identities of non-humans, it's been done for two Bugsters in Seito. Well, three. Two and a half? Dr. Kujou is a complication."

Philip, Chase finds, is refreshingly blunt. He doesn't talk around issues the way many humans do, he cuts directly to the point, and moreover he seems pleased when Chase does the same. "There was an attempt to declare the Roidmudes property of the Japanese government."

"Oh.” Philip blinks several times, rapidly. “That's offensive, I imagine you all objected strenuously."

"Yes." Chase takes a sip of his tea. "And then once it was conclusively determined that we were people, there was the question of criminal charges."

"Really? Against you?"

"Against all of us. Heart, primarily. Brain and Medic were considered accomplices."

"I imagine your being a Kamen Rider helped with your case?"

"To an extent. I am not considered a threat. As it stands, we are no longer capable of causing gravity surges or otherwise wielding serious destructive force, and are under intermittent observation. The current legal debate centers around whether a Roidmude can be considered to have experienced mental duress."

“Hm. Really? Compelling. I wouldn’t think that was a debate at all.”

Chase considers this carefully before replying. “Why would you say that?”

“If Roidmudes are people, which they certainly are, then they can of course experience mental duress, or indeed any form of psychological distress.” Philip stares into space, hands wrapped around his coffee cup. “Unfortunately I’ve found that one of the hallmarks of personhood is a capacity for acute suffering. A being self-aware enough to love must also be self-aware enough to fear losing that which they love, and that fear can naturally be leaned upon by the unethical to coerce.” More staring into space. “Or simply to terrorize. It’s even more unfortunate when one realizes that unethical people of that type will likely always exist.”

“I...had not considered this previously.” Chase frowns, slowly. He’s experiencing an unfamiliar emotion--not that there are many emotions truly familiar to him, but this one contains elements of both surprise and happiness, and he is not clear on how one might express it.

He likes Philip, he realizes. He would like to be friends with Philip. Perhaps this is how Heart feels all the time.

“If this is the case, then in your determination, do Roidmudes have souls? I am not clear on what a soul is meant to be, but it has been the subject of discussion.”

Philip actually laughs. “The nature of the soul is one of the few topics on which I’m not the man to ask, for that you might want to talk to Ghost. In fact, I’m sure he’d be happy to discuss it with you. But in my limited experience with the subject--yes, I would think that Roidmudes have souls.” He takes a long drink of coffee. “Please excuse me if this is an indelicate question, I’ve been trying not to ask these things so abruptly lately, but my research indicated that Roidmudes have a more robotic base form onto which your human guises are layered, may I see it?”

They’re at the Windscale boutique getting Heart a suit.

They’d been discussing the Agency, and Heart mentioned having been a detective very briefly and seemed interested in the work, and this had led very naturally to talking about the boss, and from there to what Shoutaro had learned from him. Including, crucially, manner of dress, a topic that Heart seems fascinated by.

“I’d thought you could just sort of...shapeshift your clothing,” Shoutaro says. “At least, Bugsters do that, and Philip had mentioned that you do something similar.”

“Well, I can.” Heart plucks at the furred cuff of his coat. “But Tomari Kiriko’s suggested that I might adjust better to living among humans if I try to pick up some of their habits, little ones, and I like clothing.” A smile flashes across his face. “Mostly I’ve been borrowing things from Tomari Shinnosuke. He’s indicated that he’d like me to stop, though, because apparently he’s tired of having to come find me if he’s missing something he wants.”

“That’s Drive and his wife, right? We’ve never actually properly met, it’s sort of an oversight on Philip’s and my part.” Shoutaro frowns. “Do you live with him?”

Another flash of smile. “For the moment, yes. I was...revived...several months before the other Roidmudes, and they offered to let me stay with them. Mostly I watch Eiji for them and help Kiriko with housework. I’m learning how to cook. Brain and Medic are staying with other friends of Tomari Shinnosuke’s until the authorities can stop arguing about us and let us find a place of our own.”

“Well...” Shoutaro squints up at him for a moment, trying not to resent the man for being taller than him. “What kind of clothing do you like? I’m not exactly an expert on men’s fashion, but I like to think I know a little bit about it.”

This time it’s not a flash, the smile stays as Heart says, “Well, I have to say, the suits that Tomari Shinnosuke and his colleagues wear aren’t very interesting, but I do like your outfit quite a lot, it’s very sharp.”

So now Heart is trying on hats, and the Windscale salesgirls are losing their minds over how handsome he is. Normally Shoutaro would be a little jealous, they’re so used to him at this point that nothing about him is interesting to them, but he can’t quite bring himself to be. Not when Heart looks so pleased to be doing such an ordinary thing. Anyway, he’s letting Shoutaro pick everything out, and it’s so rare for someone else to be this trusting of Shoutaro’s fashion sense.

He also looks very good in a three-piece suit. But then, Shoutaro thinks, straightening his waistcoat, doesn’t everyone?

“What do you think of this one, my friend?”

Shoutaro looks at the latest hat Heart’s picked out and says, after a moment’s thought, “I think you look like a real man.”

Heart pauses. “Is that a good thing in this context?”

“Yes. The best thing I can think of, really. I mean, not that it’s bad to be a woman, but--listen, what I mean is, you look good, it suits you. Do you, uh, do you like to read at all?”

“Yes, sometimes, why?”

“We’re going to a bookstore after this, there are a couple of authors I think you’d enjoy.”

“Thank you for allowing me to examine you,” Philip says, when Chase shifts back into the human form that he’s finding more and more preferable to Proto-Zero’s, “it’s been a tremendous help to me. It’s--the many varieties of personhood that exist within the modern world are terribly compelling, but so few people are willing to speak about it at any length. Which I understand, but it does make study difficult.”

Chase nods. “I understand.” Beat. “You say personhood, but not humanity?”

“They’re hardly synonymous. Like circles and ovals. Every human is a person, but not every person is human. I haven’t always fit the precise definition of human myself.” Philip’s hand stills in the middle of a furious bout of note-taking, his face taking on a faraway look that Chase is learning to recognize. “What was death like for you? If you don’t mind my asking. Personally, I find the memory very difficult to grasp. Like a dream. I know that it happened, but when I reach for it, it slips out of my fingers.”

“It was...” It takes some time to find the way to phrase the answer. “Silent. And then when it ceased to be silent, it was because I was alive again.”

Philip nods, and takes more notes, and says, “Thank you for sharing that, I appreciate it. It’s...most people I know have never died. It’s difficult to explain to them.” The notebook snaps shut suddenly, Philip’s pen slides into its spiral binding right before it’s set aside. “Now. Is there anything I can do to help you?”

Chase blinks, slowly, several times, before replying. “How do you mean?”

“You. And your fellow Roidmudes. This is not an easy world to live in, especially when one’s personhood is treated as a subject for debate instead of a given. I would like--I hope that you’ll consider me a friend. I would like you to be my friend. And as a friend I would like to offer you and the other Roidmudes whatever help I can in establishing yourselves as people deserving of independent lives.” Philip grins at him. “At the very least I’m wonderful at winning debates.”

When Philip and Chase emerge from the garage, the first thing they see is Heart sitting in one of the front room chairs with an elderly gray cat asleep on his legs, and a much younger marmalade cat draped around his neck like an ungainly scarf. His red coat is nowhere in sight; he is, instead, wearing a black three-piece suit, a vividly red shirt, and a burgundy necktie with a heart-shaped pin in it. He's also engrossed in a book in English, although when they enter the room he glances up and says, cheerfully, "Hello."

"Good afternoon, Mr. Heart, I see Shoutaro's actually succeeded in his quest to get someone else to like Windscale as much as he does, you look very good. Are you enjoying Raymond Chandler? Shoutaro, is that Mrs. Mizuishi's kitten on our friend's shoulders? Where was he this time? Mrs. Mizuishi is a bit absent-minded," Philip says to Chase, "Chobi frequently wanders off when she's looking elsewhere."

"Yes, she called when we were on our way back from the bookstore." Shoutaro's sitting at the desk, in the middle of typing what looks like a list. "He'd only gotten up a tree, Heart helped me get him down. Mrs. Mizuishi’s coming to pick him up soon."

"And I see he has Mick's approval as well."

The gray cat opens one eye and gives Philip an unamused look, as if to say, “Yeah? What are you going to do about it?” only to begin purring when Heart absently reaches down to scratch his ears.

Chase sits down next to Heart while Philip goes over to speak to Shoutaro and is immediately investigated by the orange cat, who sniffs at his ear briefly and then gets up and hops from Heart’s shoulders to his. “What are you reading?”

“A collection of detective stories. Hidari Shoutaro gave it to me. He’s making me a list of movies that I might enjoy, I think I like detectives.” Heart leans slightly so that his arm brushes Chase’s. “It’s nice to have made a new friend. I hope the questioning wasn’t too intrusive?”

After a moment’s consideration, Chase says, “No. It was an enjoyable conversation.” He reaches up offer the orange cat his hand to smell. “I think it would be safe to say that Philip is a friend as well.”

Heart breaks into a smile. “That’s wonderful! I’m very glad to hear it.”

“However, I think we are expected to return to the city shortly.”

“Right, yes, I suppose we are.”

Over at the desk, Shoutaro pulls the paper out of his typewriter, blows on it to make sure that the ink is dry, and then folds it up and tucks it into an envelope. “Here, Heart, I’ve got that list for you. And my email address is at the bottom, please let me know which one you like best, you have no idea how long it’s taken me to find someone else who’d want to watch any of this stuff. I mean, Philip watches them with me, but other than that.”

Philip laughs quietly. “I do enjoy them, partner, I’m just not as passionate about them as you are.”

Heart carefully moves Mick onto the coffee table and stands up, reaching for a black hat with a red band that Chase hadn’t previously noticed hanging off the back of his chair. Chase, similarly, has to untangle himself from the orange cat, which objects strenuously to being moved and then promptly falls asleep in his chair as soon as he’s on his feet.

“I hope you’ll visit again,” Philip says as they’re shaking hands, “for non-research purposes, of course.”

Chase nods. “I would like that.”

Next to him, Heart tucks the envelope from Shoutaro into his suit jacket and says, “Maybe we can bring Brain along next time, I think they’d get along.”

They head out the door as a group, Shoutaro saying, “You’re going to email me, right, I need to know whether you like Spade or Marlowe better.”

“Of course, although I can tell you right now that just from the reading I’ve already done I like Marlowe quite a lot.”

One more round of handshakes as they all stand next to Chase’s motorcycle, and the last thing Philip says to Chase is, “Thank you again, so much. It was a pleasure to meet you. It’s wonderful to have new friends.”

Chase nods, says, “Likewise,” and resolves to visit again as soon as it’s feasible.

#philip #chase roidmude #hidari shoutaro #heart roidmude #fanfiction #toku-fangirl-2015

20 notes · View notes

blue-bird-kny · 4 years

Note

Hey Amanda! :D I was wondering if I could request a Zenitsu x Confident!FemDemonSlyer!Reader! She encourages and looks out for everyone, perhaps even more so for a certain Thunder Breath user! ;3 ((Secnario/Fic/Headcanons, write it however you want love!♡))

Thank you for requesting!! I hope you enjoy it, idk why my sad little heart always makes me write angst but it always does, Enjoy~Amanda

Warning:Angst to fluff

(1.1k words)

When Zenitsu met you, he was immediately obsessed. You were gorgeous, a girl, and single; everything he felt he needed in a bride. “Y/N-chan! Please marry me” his doe-eyes pleaded with you, his hands clasped tightly together. Although his words were full of hope and want, a part of him knew what was to come. Like every other girl that’d turned him down, he assumed you’d be no different.

You were different though; you couldn’t help but feel for the boy in front of you. You moved close to Zenitsu, leaving mere centimeters between both your bodies as an irresistible smile graced your lips, “Sure thing lover boy, but you're going to have to buy a really nice ring”. Your mischievous eyes bore into his now blank ones, he never expected THAT answer. “Well-you know…I” Zenitsu became a blubbering mess, his face on fire in the most adorable way possible. You laughed teasingly, shifting away from the poor boy. “I’m just joking! You should have seen your face! Priceless”

After that day, Zenitsu’s obsession morphed into adoration. He admired how strong you were, how you held yourself with pride and grace, and how you never saw yourself as superior to anyone, even your opponents. You never showed fear in the face of a risky situation, instead you set yourself on the front lines wanting nothing more than to protect your friends. He sought comfort in your liveliness and self-lessness, aiming to gain your reassurance.

You two ended up in a relationship together; Zenitsu made you happier than anyone else and you only wanted to do the same for him. You two were like yin and yang; you were light that chased away shadows while he felt he was the shadows that needed chasing. When he was with you, he allowed your confidence to act as the wall from his own inner demons. You appreciated that Zenitsu felt you were reliable and trusted you with something so crucial in his well-being, you wanted him to see himself as who he really was, not the replaceable insect he felt he was.

“Take that you flat faced jackass!” you called to the demon whose head was rolling away into dust. Zenitsu watched from behind a tree with a grim expression. “One flimsy demon and I couldn’t even help her with that. It's only a matter of time before she sees the truth and breaks up with me.”

“Did you see that Zeni! And he thought he could take me on, what a creep!” you smiled in triumph “As long as I walk around with a smile, I can hold onto her a little longer”. He wore a set smile, crawling from the shadows to reach his loud girlfriend who was currently reliving her small victory with the demon. “Zeni what’s wrong?” your face quickly shifted to one of worry and concern, no matter how hard Zenitsu tried you were always able to see through the cracks of his mask.

“Nothing my Dear! Now come on, I’m sure there are more demons lurking around and I don’t want us to deal with that” you watched his slumped form walking away, nowhere near convinced with his answer. That was his tactic; avoid, avert, forget. You’d had enough of it though, You wanted to be there for Zenitsu, to really be there for him.

Your group of friends were shocked at your behavior; the entire journey home you silently trailed behind, obviously deep in thought. “Hey Zenitsu, what’s up with Y/N, she seems a little...off” Tanjiro questioned the blonde. Your turn in behavior did make him anxious, but he couldn’t let anyone else know that, “she's fine! Girls are weird anyhow, so don’t take it too seriously”. He lied through his teeth to his friend, how could he give that kind of advice when he himself was itching to have you back to normal.

“That's it, I’ll handle this when we're alone at home” you concluded.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back at the Estate where you all were supposed to be resting, you were wandering around in search of your boyfriend. “Zeni! Please come here, something I wanna talk to you about!”. You weren’t exactly sure what you’d say to get him to open up, but you did have your methods. “Zenitsu,” you started but you never continued because Zenitsu broke down in front of you.

“This is it, she's done with me” Zenitsu began to internally panic. “I’m sorry! I know I’m useless and I know that Tanjiro or Inosuke would be better partners for you and I know that I’m probably the one holding you back, but please don’t leave me...I...I need you” he voice grew weaker with every word he spoke. He’d never felt so weak, so vulnerable, but if it meant you’d stay with him he didn’t care. “Zenitsu I don’t think that's possible” you moved closer to your beloved, your heart aching as you stared into his glossy orbs. “It's not possible because you aren’t any of those things”.

“Sure the other two are great friends, but neither of them could ever make me feel the way you do. Make me feel like I’m the most important thing in their lives, so loved and appreciated. That's not something I can do on my own, that comes from you” you wrapped both your arms around his shoulder bringing him closer; he froze at this new position, he could feel your calm breath fan over the wet spots on his cheeks

“There’s also no way you are holding me back! You’re always the first one to volunteer when I train and you’re the first one there to pick me up when I fall down giving me the encouragement to continue!” you moved your face to his ear, your whispers causing a shiver to run down his spine. You wanted him to hear every one of your next words.

“And you're far from useless. Whenever we need you most, you're there for us. Worth and strength doesn't come from how many demons you kill, it comes from what's in here” you delicately planted your hand where his heart was, he was sure you could feel how rapidly it was beating. “And in your heart and through your actions, you're worth more than diamonds and gold, never think otherwise. You give me the confidence to be better than I am, I wish you would see that for yourself. To me, you're the strongest person I know. I love you with everything I am, you’ll never know how much I need you”

You sealed your speech with a slow kiss to his lips. It was brief, but so sincere that Zenitsu could physically feel the weight of each word you spoke. “Thank you Y/N” he didn’t have to say what for because you knew. You wiped away a few of his stray tears, grabbing onto his warm hands, “Lets go, I’m tired so you and I are going to go cuddle in bed!” you beamed. “Who knows, the night’s still young so maybe we can use our time to grow a little...closer” you wiggled your eyebrows suggestively.

“Y/N-chan!”

Main Masterlist

I’m back with another request, I hope you all enjoyed it:) I have some fluff and spicy pieces in the works, so you’ll see it soon ;) Stay happy and healthy~Amanda

#kny #kny x reader #demon slayer #demon slayer x reader #zenitsu x reader #zenitsu agatsuma #kny zenitsu #kny writing #zenitsu

243 notes · View notes

jackywroteabook · 4 years

Text

6 Ways to Find Inspiration for Your Story

Inspiration… the fleeting rush of ideas that seem to only come late at night or right in the middle of important tasks. Some days, it seems that inspiration has packed up and left forever – but don’t fret! No matter how hopeless it may seem, there are always ways to get that inspiration flowing again! Here are some of my favorite ways to draw in ideas when writer’s block eats away at you:

1. Personal Experience

A little over a year ago, I joined our local community theatre. My life had never been boring by any means, but since joining the theatre, I’ve had so many incredible (and hilarious) experiences… not to mention meeting quite a few interesting characters. It was like no other place I’ve been. In a time when I was desperate for ideas, a wellspring of inspiration came rushing out of this place. Now, if I were to tell you half of the antics that have gone on behind the scenes of our shows, you would never believe me. My life has gone from fairly normal to feeling like I live in a sitcom 24/7. I’ve found that backstage fun is fuel for comedy – which is my strongpoint in writing.

Though the book I’m working on has nothing to do with theatre, the experiences I’ve found there have inspired so many scenes, characters, and plot twists. You never know when one experience could turn into your favorite idea!

2. People You Know

Don’t be afraid to write about someone close to you. Trust me, I know the awkward feeling of writing about a family member or friend, wondering what they’ll think if they find out you’ve put them into a story as a villain when they’re a hero in real life. Don’t let it stop you! If you ask any writer, they’ll tell you they do the same thing. They play matchmaker with their characters by making their best friend the love interest to the story’s heroine. Most non-writers will understand – and they’re often flattered to think you’d include them! (If you’re too worried, just ask the person. The worst they can say is no – then, you change their character just enough for them to not be suspicious and have fun with your new idea!)

One of my close friends has become one of these fun characters – we’ll call him “Liam,” which is the name for the character he’s inspired. I met Liam when I was the newest person to join a group and he was the first friend I made there. In all honesty, he’s unlike any other friend I’ve had.

Not only does he have a huge heart, but he has never lost his childlike quality. Despite seeing horrible things in his life that scar even the bravest of souls, that childlike innocence has never left him. However, he has triggers that terrify him – such as loud noises. We went out for coffee one afternoon and a wet floor sign collapsed with a loud “BANG!” that made him come out of his seat. It took four of us to calm him back down. You could see the terror in his eyes taking him back to that place of horror – but, once he was able to pull himself back, his playful energy returned. Many people don’t take him seriously because of his childlike qualities – like becoming fascinated with things most people take for granted – but he is one of the most intelligent people you’ll meet… and his fierce loyalty is a rare, wonderful trait.

Recently, I’ve had a “HELP WANTED” sign hanging from the door in my brain that leads to my writing. The main character in my novel is a spunky, outgoing, and odd girl who has been in desperate need of a best friend to help her through the events in her book – and cause a bit of fun trouble along the way. “Liam” was the perfect fit!

(I have yet to tell him about this character, because I’m planning to surprise him with it once I’ve written more of the manuscript. He’s been a huge encourager of my writing and I’m very excited to stick him in.)

3. The Internet!

When in doubt, look it up online! The internet isn’t always your enemy (though it’s quite a lovely procrastination tool). Whether you’re in need of a story idea, or just a prompt to get the words flowing, the internet can be your best friend! Many websites have millions of writing prompts right at your fingertips!

4. Don’t Forget Your Notebook!

Wherever you go, never forget to have some way of capturing an idea the minute it comes – whether you have a physical notebook or a writing app on your phone. You don’t want to come across your best inspiration yet and be caught without a way to write it down! (Though, in the unfortunate case that you don’t have anything to write with, borrow a pen from someone and find the nearest thing to write on. I’ve been known to use tissues, toilet paper, my arm, and just about anything else within reach!)

5. Go out in the world and look for things.

Looking for inspiration isn’t always as hard as it seems. As writers, we’re all guilty of staring at our screens, waiting for the perfect idea to pop into our heads. I do it more often than I’d care to admit. Inspiration doesn’t work that way.

I am the type of person who sits in a meeting and observes my colleagues – every mannerism; facial expression; even just the way they speak when proposing something versus the way they speak in normal conversation. I find the distinct nature of each person fascinating. It helps tremendously with character building!

Have writer’s block? Go out for coffee with a group of the quirkiest people you know and spend four hours letting their conversations inspire you instead of four hours smashing your head against your desk. If you don’t have a quirky group of friends, go out alone or with the person you’re closest to and eavesdrop on the most interesting group of people you can find. Listen to that elderly man in the back of the coffee shop, having a sultry and questionable conversation with his girlfriend over Skype. Watch how that quiet, teenage barista longs to talk to his female co-worker, but can’t bring himself to it. Pay attention to the Dad humming his favorite Disney songs, while his twelve-year-old daughter sits beside him, sipping hot chocolate and reading her favorite horror novel. You never know who or what could inspire your bestseller. Getting out there and experiencing all of the ideas this world has to offer is much more fun than sitting alone in frustration!

6. My final, most crucial piece of advice: Never give up!

It may seem like you’ll never find the right ideas for your novel… but don’t give up hope. Be persistent, keep searching, and I promise you will find your inspiration!

#writing inspiration #writing tips #writing advice #Writers of the Future #writers helping writers #writers on tumblr #writeblr #writeblogging #writer's blog #writer's block

38 notes · View notes

Last Seen Blogs

swanwinchester99

My Boobs

bunny-eats-fox

araavos

So Very Curious

verr-one

I'm a unicorn.

hershybloom

unicorn