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digitalvirghoe · 2 months
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Lord, remove any laziness from my body. Push me to my fullest potential.
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digitalvirghoe · 2 months
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i have trust issues because people who said they would NEVER, usually always DID.
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digitalvirghoe · 8 months
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but if i did that to you, somehow i would be the one that's wrong.
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digitalvirghoe · 8 months
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I'm trying my best, even then it doesn't feel like enough.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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i wish focusing on the positive was as easy as focusing on the negative.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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it's crazy you did that to me, when I would have NEVER even thought to do it to you.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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everything works out in my favor, and that's just how it is.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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I'll jump off the empire state building before I ever let someone make me feel bad for being disrespected again.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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it's you. its always you.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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It may be bad right now and as cliche as it sounds, it will get better. It has to. Why?
If we never had the ability to feel sadness or despair, we wouldn't know what happiness is or what it feels like. To feel one, you must feel the other and I think that's one of the many beautiful things that this life has to offer, despite it's trials and tribulations.
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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A Year after an Ectopic Pregnancy
-sigh
it's officially been a year since I found out I was having an ectopic pregnancy. I remember the joy that filled me when the doctors came in and said "congratulations, you're pregnant", it was instant tears of happiness.
Only for that happiness to be destroyed in a quarter of a second. They came back in after the ultra sound, and they said they couldn't see anything. I immediately knew. "is it ectopic?" I questioned.
"yes."
So then my treatment had started, and though the zygote hadn't even been a creation for that long, I was already attached. Just because I knew I was pregnant, I was already attached to this clump of cells that wasn't going to grow into anything more. I'd hoped and wished and prayed that it would somehow travel down my fallopian tube and implant safely, but deep down I knew that wasn't the case. Not long after beginning treatment, I begin to miscarry. It was smooth, not very painful physically, but emotional wise is a whole different ballgame.
I was being ripped apart. However, I still carried on with life as if I wasn't affected. I still maintained my role in peoples lives as their support, their shoulder to cry on, and their outlet for anger. However I had none. Now I'm here a year later and it still hurts the same. I still year and long to have that baby who would've been 3 months on right now, in my arms. I grieved today, harder than I ever had this whole year. I'm excited to eventually get my rainbow at the end of the storm.
Someday
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digitalvirghoe · 9 months
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Black Sheep
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Oh child.
Look at the way you carry yourself and
everything you hold within.
You've made it so far and you never even thought
you'd see this day.
I'm so proud of you.
Please know that even if you only did your best to survive today,
you are still doing more than enough.
I understand the pain hurts and feels almost
too much to bare.
Just know you have my hand through it all and
you will never have to
walk alone.
-- A.E Poetry --
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digitalvirghoe · 10 months
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the thing about me is i'll still have your back when you don't have mine.
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digitalvirghoe · 10 months
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A Long Time Coming
I heavily struggled with
loving the woman in the mirror.
It took time to accept
who looked back at me.
As time had progressed,
it suddenly became clearer.
Not used to affirmations,
but to them I agree.
I love myself even
with my notorious flaws.
Although, loving myself is
equivalent to solving a jigsaw.
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digitalvirghoe · 10 months
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We Got a Kitten!!
It’s almost officially been a week since my fiancé and I got a kitten! Her name is Chipotle and she’s been adjusting very well. She’s already so bonded to us and is getting comfortable quickly. The only thing we are struggling with is introducing her to our dog. We have a baby gate and keep the door open so they can see and smell each other, we are just basically letting her do it on her own. Im very attached to her already and I love her with my whole heart. She has such a bubbly and funny personality. She almost three months old and she’s super lovey, constantly purring and whenever I pick her up she just melts and basically turns to liquid lol. She’s such a sweet little soul.
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