#as a disclaimer i do not watch bones it was just on | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kpopfanfictrash · 10 months

Text

Until Death (M)

Author: kpopfanfictrash

Creative Contributor:@baebae-goodnight for this unbelievable moodboard truly, like, WHAT

Genre: Green Bone Saga!AU || Organized Crime / Forbidden Romance / Suspense + Action

Author’s Note: This one shot is set in the Green Bone Saga universe, written by Fonda Lee. You do not need to have read this series in order to read this one shot (I explain concepts/terms), but I do HIGHLY encourage you to read this series at some point because it’s absolutely amazing!! Anyways, Yoongi dropped the Haegeum MV and I was like.... did he read Jade City lol. Further disclaimer this is not a retelling of the books, nor does the Kaul family exist in this version of Kekon (although the No Peak clan does)

Pairing: Yoongi / Reader

Synopsis: Jade has always shaped the island of Kekon. Mined from the mountains, it enhances the abilities of Green Bone warriors who wear it and allows them protection from outside harm. No one understands these threats better than you do, second-in-command of the mighty No Peak clan.

When a new danger appears, seeming to come from within, everything you once took for granted is called into question. Including the bonds you’ve made, some more dangerous than the others. None more so than Min Yoongi, head of No Peak and the only one capable of destroying your heart.

Rating: 18+

Warnings: graphic violence, fight scenes and mature content (character dies in the story; not main character)

NSFW Warnings: dirty talk, nipple play, fingering, spanking, oral (female), multiple orgasms, possessiveness, unprotected sex (couple is monogamous), spit, hand job

Word Count: 17,650

[ Cross-posted to Wattpad here ]

“There’s a rat in our midst,” Jungkook growls, slamming his fist to the table.

No one in the room flinches, although several glance fleetingly in the direction of the Pillar. The typically mild-mannered head of No Peak frowns, clearly disturbed by the recent attacks. Only a madman wouldn’t be.

Still, his voice remains calm while answering your second Fist. “That remains to be seen,” Yoongi says. As though the current situation could be perceived as anything but a threat.

Subtle, you flick a glance towards him, then away. In the corner of your eye, you see Yoongi’s lips curve before smoothing to nothing. Lowering his palms to rest on the table, the ends of his sleeves rise to reveal solid jade.

Leaning back, you survey the table before you. As the Horn of No Peak, it’s your job to defend the clan’s territory – by force, if necessary. Several levels of Green Bone warriors report into you, including your Fingers (the lowest of soldiers) and Fists, your direct reports.

Jungkook became Second Fist only a month prior but already, he’s created a name for himself. An impulsive, somewhat violent name for himself.

In this case though, you happen to agree with him. Not one, but two Lantern Men – commercial patrons of No Peak – have turned up dead in the past week, tortured beyond recognition. Over a week has passed since the first murder and still, there’s no suspect. Neither man was wealthy nor wore jade beyond a single piercing. Each was killed in a different part of town with no family in common. For a week, you’ve been racking your brain for motive and coming up empty.

Peeved by the thought, your fingertips dig into your leather jacket. Perceiving the shift to your aura, Yoongi starts to turn – catching himself just in time and facing forward.

An assortment of Lantern Men, Fists and Luckbringers (the money-making side of the clan) sit around a worn table. All watch the Pillar warily, as though uncertain how this meeting will end.

Tilting his head, strands of dark hair fall across Yoongi’s forehead. Studs of green line his ears, a single bolt of jade threaded through his right brow. Since the Academy, Yoongi has preferred to wear his jade as piercings – except for the clusters on fingers and wrists. He flexes these now, a visual display of power.

Jade from the island of Kekon is powerful; toxic to all but the Green Bones trained to wear it. To them, it grants unique power in each of the six disciplines: Strength, Steel, Perception, Lightness, Deflection and Channeling. Being from Kekon is no guarantee a person can wear and use jade, though. Individual tolerance varies, with most not able to withstand more than a few pieces.

No one in No Peak wears more jade than the Pillar – no one but you, that is.

This thought brings little comfort in a room such as this. Most of the sycophants seated around the table would turn on Yoongi – and No Peak – in a heartbeat. If it’d enrich their coffers, they would switch sides, honor be damned. You trust your Fists and Fingers but find it hard to extend the same grace to Namjoon’s side of the clan.

Kim Namjoon, known as the Weather Man, heads No Peak’s monetary ventures. Ranking as highly as you, he reports directly to Yoongi. Turning to face Namjoon, you make no attempt to hide your suspicion.

Although he doesn’t meet your gaze, his annoyance flares. Namjoon’s jade aura is weaker, fueled by one or two jade rings on his fingers. More would be unnecessary in his line of work. Namjoon’s lips tighten, able to Perceive your attention.

Perception is one of the more interesting skills of a Green Bone. Wearing jade creates an aura and through it, other Green Bones can sense emotion and intention. For example, you sense that Namjoon is annoyed, but you don’t know why. You can hazard a guess, based on the context.

Although you both graduated from the Academy at the same time, you barely knew Namjoon in your youth. The Kim family is legendary, having fought alongside Yoongi’s grandfather to dispel the Shotarian occupation of Kekon. You, on the other hand, moved to the city of Janloon when you were ten and joined the Academy as an outsider.

Not only were your social circles different, so were your interests. Even as children, Namjoon preferred brains over brawn, while you – well, you don’t enjoy violence, but you understood its necessity in protecting those you love. Ever since your father’s death, what you love has been No Peak.

You suppose Yoongi could’ve picked a worse person for Weather Man. Namjoon is shrewd, if occasionally withholding. He has the best interests of the clan at heart, even if you often disagree about what those interests are.

“Min-jen,” Namjoon says, the respectful title flowing from him like water. “I share your frustration with the current situation. My men are, of course, at your disposal.”

Your gaze narrows on his profile. Namjoon loves to offer help but when push comes to shove, it’s your side of the clan on the front lines.

“And what will your men do?” you inquire, drawing heads your way. “The entirety of their green couldn’t be seen in a desert.”

Someone down the table coughs, although they swiftly fall silent when Yoongi clears his throat. Disappointment radiates from him, turning his head.

“One’s worth to the clan isn’t measured in jade,” he says levelly. “You’d do well to remember that, in the future.”

Sitting back, you school your expression to nothing. Shame swirls in your stomach though because Yoongi is right. His sister is a stone-eye; someone unable to use or wear jade. Yejun feels nothing of jade’s effects – either positive or negative – but serves the clan in her own way. Kekon is superstitious about such things though and, when Yejun was born, rumors ran rampant it boded ill for Yoongi’s leadership. Rumors the Pillar has done his best to stamp out.

“Yes, Min-jen,” you acquiesce, inclining your head.

“My Luckbringers are reviewing financial statements of the victims,” Namjoon says, as though you haven’t spoken. “If there’s any monetary connection between them, we’ll find it.”

“My Fists are also investigating,” you add. “We’ll keep the clan updated.”

A scoff from the lower end of the table. Turning your head, you find Mr. Hu, a wealthy Lantern Man, watching you with a scowl. Middle-aged, with a portly belly from hoji, the man has never accepted you as his Horn. As the first woman bestowed the honor, you expected there to be some resistance.

Not that it endears him to you. Sweetly, you smile and lean forward. “Did you have something to add, Mr. Hu?”

Briefly, his gaze drops to the jade around your throat. Forcing a swallow, he forces his gaze to lift. You must give him credit; the man continues, despite the visual reminder you could kill him in seconds.

“Investigating what?” he asks, puffing out his chest. “I saw the second victim being brought in. There was… well. There was little to see. Tortured,” he adds, addressing the muttering around the table. “The man was mercilessly tortured before he was killed.”

Perceiving the shift in Yoongi’s emotions – edging towards fury – you hasten your response.

“Mr. Hu,” you say, lightly resting your hand on a Talon knife. “I thank you, for having the foresight to raise such an important issue.”

Frowning, he glances left and right, but his fellow Lantern Men avoid him. Likely, they understand this won’t end well. Indeed, Jungkook is already eyeing the man with barely concealed malice, thumb stroking slowly over the hilt of his sword.

“The fact that both victims were tortured,” you continue, conversational. “Almost as though the killer were looking for something.”

“Or someone,” Namjoon adds.

“Or someone,” you agree, focusing on Mr. Hu. “My men are searching the murder sites for more information now. While they do that though, are there any other details of an active murder investigation you’d like to know? Perhaps whether the victims pissed themselves before death, or left money behind?”

Paling, Mr. Hu seems to realize how this sounds. “N-no,” he says. “Thank you for sharing what you have, Horn-jen.”

Ignoring him, you glance in the direction of Yoongi. “We’ll find the traitor. I swear it.”

His aura flares, full of emotion unrelated to the conversation at hand. “Of that, I have no doubt,” Yoongi says lowly.

Heat floods your face, sensing his intent and swiftly, you look away before others can notice.

“While the Horn and Weather Man conduct their investigations, I ask for everyone to remain on high alert,” Yoongi says, surveying the table. “No Peak will increase Green Bone presence in the border districts. If you see anything of interest, contact the clan.”

Several Lantern Men relax at the mention of Green Bones. You know business has been hard as of late, with so many customers shaken by the violence. Hopefully, this will convince the people No Peak has the situation in hand. Otherwise, why would the Lantern Men continue to pay for your protection?

Glancing at the bloody photographs laid out on the table, you can hardly blame them for their skittishness. Whoever killed these two victims was skilled. Their torture tactics are pristine, better than most graduates from the Academy. A skill you also possess, although you choose not to use it outside of last resorts. Even then –

Your fingers cease tapping against your leather jacket. Straightening, you realize the skill displayed is exactly that of the Academy. The cuts, the angle of the blade and depth of the wounds – all of it, textbook. A Green Bone did this, you’re certain.

Sharply, you glance up and allow your distress to show. Voicing your suspicion aloud would only end badly. Above all, the Pillar must appear in control. If a Green Bone – even a disgraced one – is murdering citizens of No Peak, it would be a disaster. Better to discuss your suspicions in private before airing them to the entire group.

Perceiving the shift in your emotions, Yoongi stiffens. “We’ll update you with any new information,” he says, dismissal clear in his tone. “Thank you for coming.”

Chair legs scrape floorboards, patrons filing out as they murmur to one another. Asha, your First Fist, hovers by the door until you give a discreet shake of your head. Nodding, she slips out and you see Jungkook follow.

To one side, Yoongi converses tersely with his Pillarman, Hoseok, until Hoseok exhales and swiftly exits the room. Kim Namjoon stays, drinking a glass of water at the opposite end of the table. Once you three are alone, Yoongi holds up his hand. He waits, utterly still until the last jade aura fades.

Only then does he turn. “Well, Y/N?” he drawls. “What did you realize?”

Not wasting time, you pluck a photograph from the pile and toss it before him. “These cuts,” you explain. “They were made by a moon blade. So precise – so even. Exactly the length taught at the Academy. Which means–”

“Shit,” Namjoon mutters. He sets down his glass. “We’re fucked.”

You give him a look. “Precisely.”

Yoongi frowns, his distaste palpable. “This is the work of a Green Bone.”

“I think so.”

Pushing his chair back to stand, Namjoon grabs a photo and turns it sideways. “Why would a Green Bone go after a Lantern Man, though?” he wonders out loud. “He wasn’t even wearing jade when he died – it’s against aisho.”

Yoongi’s lips press tightly together.

Aisho refers to the strict code of honor governing all who wear jade. There are many tenets, but first and foremost is that those who wear jade don’t harm the jadeless. Aisho also limits retaliation following honorable duels, ensuring the clan lines remain intact.

A Green Bone who follows aisho would never attack a citizen.

Which forces you to draw an unsavory conclusion. “Unless they didn’t care,” you say, voicing the worst possibility. “The killer could have been trained as a Green Bone and left.” Stiffening slightly, you glance at Yoongi. “You don’t think…”

“I do,” Yoongi mutters. His jaw clenches, then unclenches. “Maro.”

Namjoon swears softly.

Maro – known to most as Toh Marosun – is a traitor to No Peak. He grew up in the same circle as Namjoon, Yoongi, and other high-ranking Green Bones. Maro attended the Academy in the same class as Yoongi, and everyone expected him to become the Horn. Brilliant, swift, and vicious in battle – not to mention one of Yoongi’s closest friends.

Despite this fact, you never liked him. Having grown up the only daughter of an unremarkable Lantern Man, you experienced Maro the way most people did. Toh Marosun was cruel. Saccharine, willing to say whatever people in power wanted to hear. Maro knew exactly what to do, what to say to manipulate followers. From the beginning, you saw Maro for who he was – a bully.

He joined No Peak’s ranks as a Finger, but swiftly rose to prominence. By the time you graduated, Maro was the youngest Fist in No Peak’s history. What he lacked in jade tolerance he made up for in cunning. Maro was always more sensitive to jade, but he was also smart. Talented, with the skills he did have.

In Green Bone society, there are two ways to gain jade – gifted or earned. Green Bones win jade through physical duels, taking the green from those they defeat. Recklessly, Maro began to challenge rival clans and often, he won despite not being able to wear his spoils. He displayed his jade often, which you suppose should’ve been the first warning sign.

Maro cared too much for personal glory. In Kekon, glory is achieved through the clan. Even the Horn and the Weather Man only exist to further No Peak’s prowess. The Pillar themselves is the embodiment of the clan, not their own person.

Even now, you recall the day Maro’s crimes were exposed.

Seven years prior, you were a Finger on routine patrol when Sain, your Fist, was commanded to return to the Min property. He brought you along, stationed by the front gate to ensure no one left.

You guarded with another Finger, one whose name you don’t recall. What you do remember is the utter stillness of the day, the unnatural calm which comes before a storm. The sun was bright overhead, a thick bead of sweat sliding down your neck when the door behind you at the main house banged open.

A man tumbled down the steps, landing in a heap in the billowing dirt. Coughing, he struggled to right himself, but both his hands were bound. From your spot at the gate, you couldn’t see clearly but you scented his blood. Heard the bruised rasp of his breath.

Yoongi prowled down the front steps, his famed Da Tanori steel glinting in his right hand. His gaze never wavered from the man bound before him – Toh Marosun, his former friend.

“Do you deny it?” Yoongi asked, his voice soft but deadly. Despite this, you Perceived conflicting emotions within.

Toh Maro stayed silent. Eventually, he exhaled.

“No,” he said sullenly.

Unable to stop it, you turned and saw Maro staring unflinchingly up at the Pillar. Yoongi stood over him, his lips a thin line of displeasure. You didn’t know what had happened but feared the worst from Yoongi’s expression.

In that moment, you didn’t envy the Pillar. Yoongi had become head of No Peak only a year prior; in many ways, he was as untried as you were. He was a silent, intelligent man and many people thought they could take advantage of him.

They were wrong, of course, but it would take time to prove that.

On that day though, you felt the dull grief to his aura. “Then I am sorry,” Yoongi said quietly. “For you leave me with no choice. Toh Marosun, you stand accused of smuggling jade from No Peak – one of the worst crimes a Green Bone can commit.”

The entirety of your blood drained as you turned around.

Spine steeling, you gripped your knives tighter. There were few crimes so awful they couldn’t be forgiven, but stealing from the clan was one of them. Cutting off Maro’s ear would be too light a punishment, especially with Yoongi so untried a Pillar. Death would be acceptable. Expected, even.

It would be the Pillar’s call – the clans weren’t run as a democracy. Straining Perception, you listened closely behind you. Although you’d interacted little with the Pillar, the man behind the mask couldn’t help but intrigue you.

Broken sobs filled the clearing, and you heard the sudden thud of knees hitting the grass. No jade aura accompanied the sound.

“Yoongi, please,” gasped a voice – feminine, young. “Brother, please spare him. Don’t kill him, he –”

“Silence.” Yoongi’s voice echoed over the courtyard. The newcomer obeyed with a lone, stifled sob. “You’ve been found innocent, sister,” he said, sounding weary. “But that does not make you innocent.”

The threat of his words hung overhead and although Yejun continued to sniffle, the sound of it muffled. When you glanced sideways again, you saw her face in her palms.

Yoongi watched dispassionately, although you sensed his inner turmoil. Rumors had reached your ears by then that Maro was dating Yejun. It seemed to be true, based on the way she pleaded.

Returning to face the gate, the yard remained silent until Yoongi exhaled. “Toh Marosun,” he declared, his sword sheathing. “From this day on, you are banished from Kekon. Return your jade to the clan and go. If you return to Janloon, your life is forfeit. Take him,” he said, speaking to someone you couldn’t see.

You didn’t dare turn, but tugged your knives a half-inch from their sheathes. If Maro decided to fight, you’d be expected to protect the Pillar. For whatever reason – disbelief, or respect – Maro didn’t attack, and no violence took place. He left in the waiting car, but you’ll never forget the look on his face when he passed.

Despite your young age, you recognized the glint in his eye. Fury, tempered by disbelief. He’ll be back, you thought grimly. It was only a matter of time before someone like Maro declared vengeance.

Your gaze slid to Yoongi, wondering if he felt the same. He watched Maro leave, his expression carefully neutral before he turned around and entered the house. Yejun had already disappeared, likely leaving upon Maro’s banishment.

The expression on Yoongi’s face now is similar, staring down at the photograph. Another moment passes before you realize something else.

“They knew each other,” you say, glancing between the victims. Reaching out, your hand lightly touches a photo. “Icho Retubin. He worked for the Weather Man after the Academy. And this man here” – you touch the other – “Niru Roluan. A low-ranking Finger who quit after a year.”

“He was friendly with Marosun,” Namjoon recalls.

“Yes.” Eyes wide, you look up. “After Maro’s scheme was uncovered, both of them quit and began working as Lantern Men.”

“Interesting,” Yoongi muses. “So. Toh Marosun returns. He tortures and kills his former friends – why?” he murmurs, speaking more to himself than either of you.

Brow lowering, you search for the easy answer. “He’s torturing them for something,” you say, glancing at the wounds. “Information, maybe.”

Yoongi tilts his head. “Which begs the question – has Maro found what he wants, or is he still looking?”

“Does it matter?”

Namjoon shrugs at your question. “If Maro hasn’t found what he wants, he’ll strike again. If he did find it – well. We might be out of time.”

Yoongi considers. “He didn’t find it,” he says, turning around to stride for the door. “Call it a gut feeling.”

Your gaze narrows on his backside. “Let’s call it more than that.”

Yoongi turns around, lips twitching in a smile only you see. “I can think of two reasons Maro might return. One – jade.” The Pillar lifts a finger. “Or, two – revenge.” His second lifts.

You and Namjoon exchange a look. “Maro could find jade on the Shotarian black market if he wanted,” you say.

“Exactly.” Yoongi drops his hand. “Which is why I’m inclined to call this revenge.”

“Maro could want revenge on anyone, though,” Namjoon points out. “Most likely whoever sold him out in the first place.”

“Well, that makes this easier.” Casual, Yoongi tucks both hands in his pockets. “I sold him out. I discovered details of his jade smuggling in Yejun’s apartment.”

“Yejun?” Sharply, you look at him. “Your sister knew?”

Yoongi’s gaze hardens. “Yes, she knew,” he says. “I’m sure you understand why I kept that piece of information to myself until now. Yejun wasn’t involved with the smuggling, but she knew it was happening… and didn’t tell me,” he adds, his voice grim.

Mind reeling, you attempt to digest this piece of information. Betrayal lodges deep in your gut, although you do your best to dispel it. It’s pointless to expect Yoongi to tell you everything – especially events which occurred before you became the Horn.

Namjoon also looks troubled. “That’s… but that means–”

“Careful what you say, Namjoon.” Although his tone remains soft, Yoongi’s body tenses. “The matter is done. I punished Yejun as I saw fit, within my right as Pillar. Trust me,” he adds, his façade cracking a little. “Her deception was dealt with.”

Silently, you wonder if this is why Yejun studied in Espenia. As a stone-eye, she can’t serve the clan as a Green Bone, but could have taken other paths. She could have become a Luckbringer on Namjoon’s side or begun a career in government. Instead, Yejun left Janloon for a foreign University. It was only recently she returned to start her residency at Jan Royal University.

Curious, your gaze flicks to Yoongi. If what he says is true, then surely, he knows Maro is coming for him. Yejun might not have betrayed him, but Min Yoongi did. It’s only a matter of time before Maro discovers what happened.

Blood simmering, you do your best to hide your frustration. Your role as Horn would be much easier if the Pillar would be honest about all his enemies. Suppressing your scowl, you ignore the heat of Yoongi’s gaze on the side of your face.

“Namjoon,” he says, turning away. “I want a list of potential targets. People Maro has worked with in the past or knew at the Academy. Assuming he doesn’t have the information he wants, Maro will strike again.”

“On it,” Namjoon says, already heading for the door.

Although faint, you can feel the cool brush of his aura passing. You envy the Weather Man’s ability to ingest information and remove partiality. Even after something like Yejun’s betrayal, he remains unflappable. Namjoon simply absorbs and executes, doing what needs to be done.

Left alone with your thinking, you can’t claim the same. Namjoon’s jade aura fades when he exits, footsteps receding to leave you alone with the Pillar.

You refuse to look at him, casting your Perception outward. A Green Bone with as much jade as you have can Perceive a beetle crawling through the tall grass outside. Feel the rumble of cars on the distant streets. Hear Yoongi’s heart beat from across the room.

Wearing jade results in a dizzying expansion of knowledge. You’re used to it by now – years of training and genetics lessen the risk of being overwhelmed. Without either, it’s all too easy to lose control.

It’s one of the reasons jade-smuggling is a serious crime. The other being that jade is the main source of income funding the clans. Selling jade through non-regulated channels increases the risk of it falling into the wrong hands. Hands which could bring negative consequences to other people or themselves.

Aisho outlines a strict Green Bone code of honor. It states Kekon first, clan first, family first. Occasionally, all three are tied and occasionally, one outstrips the other. Maro disobeyed every rule by selling jade to the Shotarians.

Maro knew all this and chose to continue, blinded by greed. He placed his personal glory above that of the clan, something which must be dealt with. To a lesser degree, Yejun chose Maro over No Peak, as well – which is why you’re surprised Yoongi said nothing.

“Y/N.”

Yoongi speaks your name softly, forgoing your title.

Stiffening, you force yourself not to turn. “Don’t call me that.”

“What?” he asks, his voice moving closer. “Your name?”

Hand brushing your elbow, Yoongi turns you to face him. Against all better judgement, you obey – and find your first mistake. Meeting his gaze, a ripple of familiarity – of home, a voice whispers – goes through you.

Shutting all this down, you lift your chin. “You lied to me.”

Yoongi’s expression flattens. “I couldn’t explain.”

“You could have. You chose not to.”

“I couldn’t,” he insists. “I’m still not sure I didn’t make a mistake. I showed mercy, Y/N.” Yoongi pauses, then swallows. “I exiled my friend and sent my sister away – and now, look what’s happened. Two men have been killed, and it’s my fault. How could I have told you,” he adds, the words desperate, “when I knew it’d result in that look on your face?”

“I’m looking at you like this because you lied. Not because of a decision you made in the past. Mercy isn’t a weakness, Min Yoongi.”

“Some would say that it is,” he murmurs. Fleeting, his gaze drops to your lips.

Yoongi drops all restraint so his emotion, so often concealed, smears through his aura. Longing, anger and fear, mixed with worry.

White-hot electricity jumps over your skin. Seeing the normally reserved Pillar undone in your presence is a heady knowledge. Knowledge that terrifies you, even as everything in you aches to move closer.

“It’s not,” you exhale, meeting his gaze.

Something falters in his expression and Yoongi stares at you, heated. You Perceive his intent – a rough flare to his aura – a moment before Yoongi bends and crushes your mouth to his. His kiss is thorough, intent, his body curving with yours while walking you towards the wall.

You instantly cave, unable to withstand the desperate sweep of his tongue. “Yoongi,” you groan, fingers gripping him tighter. “People will hear.”

“Let them,” he says, his voice undeterred.

Before you can respond, his lips fall upon yours with increasing urgency. Hand slipping beneath your jacket, Yoongi cups your waist to pull you taut against him. Eyes falling shut, you swiftly scan the building for lingering Green Bones. Finding no one, you return your attention to Yoongi and bite down on his lip.

He growls, grip tightening when you tug him towards you. Breaking away, Yoongi lowers his head to suck the curve of your throat. He lingers at your jade, tongue darting out to lick the skin underneath. Your entire body shudders, aroused by the sensation.

Touching another person’s jade is intimate. Most wouldn’t allow their own family the honor, let alone someone they sleep with. Skin contact with jade imbues power, and the swift rise and fall of it can be dangerous. Only Yoongi is brave – or foolish – enough to risk the effects.

Spine on the wall, you inhale at the rush. Yoongi’s length presses against your core, already hard through the confines of his pants. It seems unfathomable that this man, a stranger to you for so long, can inspire such potent emotion.

When you first met him, you were ten, and he was fourteen. You didn’t know who Yoongi was at the time – a fact which now seems unthinkable. Raised in southern Kekon, you came to Janloon after your mother’s death with little understanding of clan politics. Likely, you would have remained so if your high jade tolerance hadn’t pushed your father to enroll you at the Academy.

Walking through the gates that first day, you found nothing but apathy. The best-case scenario was your classmates left you alone. Worst-case, the other children were brutal. You attended school with the sons and daughters of high-ranking clan members. Although your father joined No Peak as a Lantern Man eventually, he could hardly be called successful. The Academy had no patience for a rural girl whose jade tolerance far outstripped their own.

It wore on your classmates’ pride when the teachers praised you. You began to get noticed, and not in a good way. Fed up with your presence, one of the students attacked you at the end of your first year. Even then, you knew how to defend yourself and flipped him on his back. Stunned, he stared up at you before yelling to anyone within earshot that you’d regret this. His father was a powerful Lantern Man of No Peak and he said you’d be banished before graduation.

Fear gripped you, sensing the truth to his words. Based on your own experience, you knew No Peak wouldn’t believe you over one of their own.

Despair filled your thoughts as someone entered the corridor. Your attacker instantly froze, which should have clued you in this was someone important. Still, you refused to look, reticent to turn your back on an opponent.

The newcomer cleared their throat, further stoking your ire. After a moment, you dragged your attention to them.

Min Yoongi stared back, his expression mild. “So,” he said. “Who can tell me what happened?”

Looking him up and down, you chose not to respond. You didn’t trust a stranger – a fourth year at that – to intervene on your behalf. Most likely, Yoongi was a member of No Peak and had only arrived to harass you further.

Seeing your hesitance, your attacker jumped in. He accused you of treachery, saying you jumped him in the corridor and threw him on the ground. Silent, your fingers curled into fists, but you remained quiet, even when Yoongi turned.

“Well?” he asked you. “Is that right?”

Your lips dropped into a scowl. “He deserved what he got.”

Subtle, his brow flicked upward.

To your dismay, you saw people had gathered as whispers broke out. A sinking suspicion occurred to you that something was wrong. Not with your attacker, but whoever this was.

Yoongi stared at you for a long moment before, to your surprise, he chuckled. “I agree.” Turning to face the boy, a dangerous light entered his eye. “I’d suggest not telling your father what happened, Heike. Because then, I might feel honor-bound to confess what I saw. Which was his son ruthlessly attack a first year, lose and then lie about it to his future Pillar.”

Color bled swiftly from Heike’s skin. “Yes, Min-jen,” he whispered, head bowed in shame.

Panic-stricken, you stared as realization sunk in you’d been flippant to the future Pillar. Steeling yourself, you waited for Min Yoongi’s response – likely anger or worse. Based on your experience, most men in power liked this fact to be known.

Instead, Yoongi merely turned and looked you up and down. His gaze traveled you slowly, unreadable in his scrutiny. At last, he glanced up.

“Your father owns the tea shop by the docks, yes?” he said, waiting for you to nod before he continued. “He joined No Peak as a Lantern Man last year.”

“Yes, he did.”

His lips twitched. “Well, then,” Yoongi said as he turned away. “I can’t help but be grateful he chose No Peak to patron. It would’ve been shame to lose you to another clan.”

Stricken, you watched as he strode from the courtyard. Minutes passed, and eventually you realized the crowd had dispersed. Heike skulked off to nurse his wounds and the future Pillar had gone, giving them no reason to stay.

If you weren’t loyal to No Peak before, you certainly were after. Yoongi had that type of effect on people.

After that day though, you rarely interacted. Yoongi was four years your senior and the future Pillar, while you were nobody. Albeit a talented nobody who graduated at the top of their class from the Academy. At your graduation, people whispered you’d make a strong Fist. No one ever imagined you’d rise higher than that.

You joined No Peak as a Finger, starting from the bottom. Yoongi continued to remain out of reach, the newly named Pillar struggling to earn his own title. It didn’t take long though, before you rose in the ranks. You spent two years as a Finger, then two as a Fist – you were twenty-two years old when promoted to Horn. The youngest in history, and a woman to boot.

Yoongi was adamant in the choice, defending you calmly to the entire clan. He said he’d rather have the right person at a young age than the wrong person at the right age. His support was the only reason you didn’t strangle him that first year. It was the beginning of working together and as it turned out, Yoongi drove you mad.

He micromanaged, overseeing all decisions to ensure No Peak ran smoothly. You two bickered often, the fire eventually dissipating to begrudging acceptance. Ultimately, you realized you saw the world the same – No Peak first, followed by everything else.

Back then, Yoongi dated but none of them stuck. No one understood the sacrifice necessary to remain head of No Peak. Couldn’t comprehend the ruthlessness, the dedication it took to lead the clan. Yoongi could never let his guard down, could never relax with the weight of the world on his shoulders.

You understood, though, because you shared this burden. Yoongi could be honest with you in a way he couldn’t be elsewhere. To the rest of the clan, he was the infallible Pillar, but to you, he was only a man.

Proof of said manhood hardens against your thigh, and Yoongi’s lips curve gamely at the base of your throat. Head lifting, his smile is sharp enough to carve the remaining bit of your heart.

“You left early this morning,” he observes, his gaze dimming. “Why?”

Your eyes trace his lips before lifting to his face. “Hian called in sick, so I replaced his watch. My Fists are spread thin, Yoongi.”

A wrinkle forms between his brows. “You should’ve woken me.”

“Why?” you tease, your hand sliding lower to rest above his hip. “To watch me go? You needed your sleep.”

“I needed you more.”

Yoongi’s words still your fingertips, struck by his honesty. Min Yoongi is nothing if not blunt, leaving you often speechless. What began as just sex, mounting frustration between friends, has become something almost too tenuous to name. The idea of having him scares you nearly as much as the prospect of losing him.

“You had me last night,” you murmur.

Yoongi’s fingers drift across your cheek. “And yet,” he says, unwilling to let you off the hook. “I woke up ravenous.”

Multiple meanings layer his words, some of which you purposefully choose not to hear. Instead, you glance past him to search the grounds. Several Green Bones cross the lawn, none of them close enough to overhear. Still, it reminds you of what’s at stake.

Exhaling gently, you pull from his touch. “I should go,” you tell him.

Head tilted, Yoongi’s dark hair conceals the jade in his brow. His brow wrinkles when he Perceives your tumultuous emotions.

“You’re worried,” he says.

“Of course, I am,” you say with a frustrated laugh. “I’m your Horn, Yoongi. It’s my job to protect the clan – to protect you – and right now, it feels like I’m failing.”

His gaze on you sharpens. “First off, I can protect myself. Second – it’s my job as Pillar to protect the clan. How can you protect us from something I can’t see?”

“How many times do I have to say you don’t shoulder that burden alone?”

The lines around his mouth deepen. “In good times, I’m lauded. It only follows that in bad times, I’m the one at fault.”

“Oh, if that’s all,” you say drily. “I, for one, have never lauded you.”

“Oh, really?” Stepping closer, his expression shifts from frustration to carnal. “I seem to recall differently last night.”

Electricity catches each place his gaze lingers, shivering its way down your spine. Refusing to let him notice, you lift your chin higher. “You’d have to remind me. It all blurs together.”

Yoongi bares his teeth, and you can’t help but smile. If there’s one thing the Pillar of No Peak can’t resist, it’s a challenge. The start of your relationship is proof enough of that.

After your promotion to Horn, you spent most waking hours by Yoongi’s side. Working with him was exhausting. Every decision turned into an argument. How many Fists you should have. How many students to admit to the Academy. Whether you should train with the Kekonese military or not.

Yoongi constantly occupied space in your thoughts, and not in a good way. He frustrated you, forcing you to second-guess and slow down your thought process. Maddeningly, he was often correct, which only served to further your irritation.

Eventually, things began to shift. Bickering turned to acceptance and finally, understanding. Yoongi trusted you more often to make the right calls and in turn, you snapped at him less for his input. Your arguments dwindled, then disappeared altogether.

Three years passed as Horn, and soon your frustration gave way to a different kind. You started to notice when Min Yoongi entered the room. At first, you brushed it off as nothing. Yoongi had an undeniable presence, this was true. Soon though, you realized your thoughts breached the border of friendship.

His absence could be felt like a phantom limb. Yoongi’s jade aura comforted you despite its fierceness – so at odds with the calm way he carried himself.

Idly, you wondered what it would take for him to snap. To release his infamous self-control and fully give in. Thoughts of what Yoongi would feel like left your body scorched. On more than one occasion, you awoke with an ache between your legs and a dream of his face slipping away.

Such thoughts though, were dangerous. Yoongi was the Pillar, and you were his Horn – a relationship couldn’t happen and what’s more, he’d shown no interest. You began to withdraw out of self-preservation. Prior, you sparred with Yoongi every morning but soon found yourself making excuses to skip.

What was once daily practice turned into every week and then, once a month. Yoongi was a distraction you could ill-afford, disarming you with his laughter as easily as his sword.

Instead, you forced your attention on training your Fists. Firstday through Fifthday, you met Asha and Jungkook at the gym before dawn. This went on for months, training in secret until one day you exited and saw Yoongi’s car at the curb. Stomach sinking, you watched as he reversed and sped down the street.

Perceiving tumultuous emotion, you knew confrontation was inevitable but hoped Yoongi would give you time to process.

He did not.

Instead, Yoongi pounded on your door the very next morning. When you finally answered, he tossed a practice sword your way and demanded you dress.

Shaking free of your stupor, you glared at Yoongi a moment before slamming the door. Stalking inside, you threw gear in a bag and returned to the hall. Stomping past him, you refused to acknowledge Yoongi, throwing open the door to his Duchesse Priza.

Yoongi sped to his place in silence, tension churning between you like water beneath a ferry. At his gym, you stormed out and ripped the sword from its sheath. Yoongi followed closely behind, barely leashed emotion rolling off him in waves.

You flew at him first, your body Light, and then Strong while swinging towards his head. Moving through the various jade disciplines, you relied on training hammered into your bones. Yoongi caught a blow on his forearm, Steeling his skin to avoid any damage. The two of you entered a familiar rhythm, understanding the other in ways no one else could.

It must’ve been hours before you threw down your sword and declared the match ended. Yoongi simply stared, his chest heaving with a wild spark in his eyes.

You were turning to leave when he dropped his blade, strode across the clearing and crushed your mouth to his.

Five months have passed since. Your relationship has been kept a secret, with you unwilling to place any labels. People would talk if the Horn and Pillar were dating. You don’t want that for yourself. Not when you’ve worked so hard for credibility.

Pressing his thumb to your lower lip, Yoongi drags it lower before he releases. “I’ll have to remind you, then,” he says before stepping away. The heat dissipates from his gaze, leaving you cold. “But you’re right. I should go.”

Somewhat dazed, you feel yourself nod. This is what you wanted, you remind yourself. This is exactly what you asked for, so you have no right to feel abandoned.

“Send me the list Namjoon makes,” you say, forcing lightness to your tone. “I’ll send Green Bones to watch their houses.”

Yoongi opens his mouth, then seems to think better of it and merely nods. He stays silent when you leave, brushing past him to the hall. Outside, you pause on the landing before you continue.

His jade aura fades as you exit, letting you know he remains. You do your best to ignore him, flipping your keys as you stride towards your car – not as nice as Yoongi’s, but serviceable nonetheless. Yanking open the door, you slide onto the sticky-warm gray leather seat.

Exhaling, you stare at the wheel before shifting to drive. Lowering the windows, you allow a slight breeze to drift over your face. As much as you pretend to be happy with the current situation, you’re not. You aren’t stupid – you know your feelings for Yoongi extend beyond those of a Horn to their Pillar.

When you first became Horn, you respected Yoongi. He was a good leader – still is – and you were proud to be the person strengthening No Peak by his side. Now, he’s the closest thing you have to family. Deep down, you understand his pardon of Yejun. If you were in a similar situation, there’s nothing Yoongi could do that you wouldn’t forgive.

Especially now, with your father dead. It happened soon after graduation, a sudden collapse of his heart no one saw coming. Yoongi attended his funeral. It was held on a rain soaked Seventhday after the Autumn Festival. Late in the season for a deluge but fitting for the occasion. It felt like the world was wiped clean, along with your prior life.

For the Pillar to attend was unusual, but not unprecedented. You recall him standing near the back, his Pillarman, Hoseok, at his side. The funeral was short – your father wasn’t garrulous by any means – but rain soaked your dress by the time it had ended. It surprised you when Yoongi came to express his sorrow, even more so when he seemed to mean it. Most people didn’t. Most people came for the spectacle, or to say they were there.

Yoongi though, gripped your hand tightly while meeting your gaze. His calluses were as rough as your own when he said the clan would support you. Oddly enough, you believed him.

With both parents dead, and no siblings, No Peak is the only family you have. Yoongi’s life is similar to yours, apart from Yejun. His father died of cancer when he was twenty-one and his mother soon followed, unable to cope. Yoongi knows what loss means, what it feels like to be alone.

Lips tightening, you imagine what it’d feel like to lose him. Worse than a Horn should feel when they lose a Pillar. Silent, you curse yourself for having poor foresight. There’s a reason the Horn and Pillar don’t date. A reason why such a relationship would be forbidden. It’s your job to protect the clan – not just Yoongi – but if it came down to it, you’d choose him every time.

Weaving through the bustling streets of Janloon, your speed is forced to slow. Janloon, the capital city of Kekon, is full of contractions. The latest car models pass beneath flashing billboards, coupled with street stalls and sprawling temples. Scents of the city mingle with stale AC from your car.

No matter how much time passes, Kekon stubbornly clings to its roots. Portions of the outside world may infiltrate, but they’ll never replace. This is something Green Bones and the clans understand.

Traffic forces you to park a block away from your destination. Striding towards the Twice Lucky, you nod at a few Lantern Men idling outside. Asha and Jungkook wait for you in a private room, lounging in seats around the square table. The second floor of the Twice Lucky has been reserved for Green Bones; a privilege No Peak ensures is well-compensated.

Jungkook sits in his usual spot, arms crossed and feet up. Asha is restless, fingertips drumming against the hilt of her blade. Food and water are laid out, half-eaten as though there were others here before.

Sensing your presence, your first Fist looks up. “Y/N-jen.” Asha straightens. “Any news?”

Crossing the room, you scan the building but Perceive no other Green Bones. Sinking into a chair, you pull a plate closer and pick up red chopsticks.

Jungkook turns towards you. “What’d you discuss with the Pillar? Seemed important.”

Asha gives him a warning look, to which he only shrugs.

Ignoring them both, you stab a dumpling. “We suspect the killings were done by a Green Bone. Do you remember Toh Marosun?”

Asha’s head whips in your direction. Jungkook was at the Academy during Maro’s betrayal, but Asha was there and remembers how it went down. If Maro has returned, it’s only a matter of time before things get worse.

“Of course, we remember.” Her eyes narrow. “So, it’s really him? Maro came back?”

“Maybe.” You hesitate another moment, then finish the dumpling. “It’s only a guess.”

“A pretty good guess, if you’re telling us,” Jungkook muses. “Why come back now, though? Returning to Kekon is a death sentence.”

“Is it?” Asha fights a smirk. “Everyone knew Yejun had a thing for Maro.”

Casual, you retrieve a talon knife from its sheath. You begin cleaning the blade, the weapon a natural extension of your wrist, and feel Asha and Jungkook’s gazes follow.

“I don’t think that’s relevant, do you?” you say calmly. “Not unless you’re questioning the Pillar’s judgement.”

Asha looks away, miffed. “No, jen,” she mutters. “Of course, not.”

“Good.” You pause, allowing your fury to seep into your aura. “The Pillar deserves nothing less than your respect. Which means Jungkook is right – coming back here is a death sentence, begging the question of why.”

Jungkook considers. “Maybe he left something.”

Asha turns back, the moment of tension forgotten. “He could be after his jade,” she offers. “Maro was always thin-blooded, so if it’s jade he wants, this could get bad. He could come down with the Itches.”

Sheathing your knife, you look up. “I agree. Maro might not be in his right mind.”

“What should we do?”

“Nothing for now,” you tell her. “Namjoon is compiling a list of people Maro knew. If he hasn’t found what he’s after by now, he could strike again.”

Asha nods and accepts this. Pushing aside a twinge of regret, you wish you could explain the rest. If Yoongi is a target though, it’s best to keep that fact quiet. And as much as you’d like to blame the Luckbringers, you have no way of knowing who’s helping Maro – either by will or by force.

A phone rings on the lower level, barely audible over the din. The Twice Lucky restaurant doesn’t have the best food in Janloon, but the quality is good, and its owner is loyal. The same can’t be said for other places.

Footsteps pound on the staircase, and Jungkook springs to his feet. Before you can warn him, the door opens and Mr. Une, the proprietor, freezes in place.

“Put that away,” you demand, waving for Jungkook to lower his knife.

Eyes wide, Mr. Une stares while your Second Fist sheaths his weapon. Seating himself at the table, Jungkook kicks both feet up like nothing has happened. The third-highest amount of jade in the clan lies coiled about his neck, polished stones resting against his tan skin.

Mr. Une continues to stare, wary until you pointedly clear your throat. “Uncle,” you say, adopting the deferential. “What can we do for you?”

Somewhat placated, Mr. Une turns his head. “Phone call for you, Horn-jen. The Weather Man said it’s urgent. You can use the phone in my office if you’d like.”

Smile disappearing, you stand. “Lead the way.”

Mr. Une blinks, and you realize you’ve crossed the room in less time than it took Jungkook to draw his knife. Inwardly, you sigh and attempt to appear harmless. The citizens of Janloon are used to living with Green Bones but sometimes, your power is a reminder of what they are not. Of the inherent danger of living amongst latent gods.

Following Mr. Une, you head towards his office. Asha and Jungkook walk close behind, with Jungkook at the rear and Asha by your side. Mr. Une hovers awkwardly at the door before turning around and pushing into the kitchen.

Once he’s gone, you lift the phone. “Hello?” you say.

Namjoon’s voice barks in your ear. “Get back to the Min property. Now.”

Your stomach drops. “What happened?”

“Maro struck again,” he says tightly. “It’s definitely Maro – and the victim is still alive.”

“Who is it?” you ask, expecting the worst.

“Jio Reubin. He managed to escape and made it here, but he’s injured. This is our best chance to get information.”

“On my way,” you say, and hang up.

Taking a deep breath, you allow the reality of Namjoon’s words to wash over you. Jio is hurt, meaning you need to interrogate soon in case he dies. Nausea curdles your stomach, and you try to dispel it.

Guilt wars with relief from knowing Yoongi is safe. You’ve met Jio several times, having attended the Academy with his now-wife, Lula. She never took to the bloodier side of the clan, deciding to enter the medical profession instead. If you remember correctly, she’s in the same resident program as Yejun.

Leaving the office, you nod for Jungkook to follow. He falls into step beside you. “I need you to do something for me,” you say to Asha. “Head to Jio Reubin’s and search the area for Maro. Call me if you find anything.”

She nods and turns, disappearing out the side door.

You and Jungkook exit the front, squinting when you emerge in the golden hour. “Follow me to the Min property,” you say grimly.

Jungkook nods as he turns, aura pulsing with adrenaline while growing fainter. You should warn him to be cautious but know it’d be hypocritical. Your own car’s speed is nearly twice the limit as you rush through the streets of Janloon, returning to the gates of the Min property.

Screeching to a halt, you yank keys from the ignition and sprint across the courtyard. Namjoon’s aura pulses from the main house, so you follow the trail and shove open the door.

Namjoon doesn’t look up when you enter, and you immediately see why. Jio lies splayed on the sofa, right arm dangling listlessly from a red cushion. At first, you think that’s the color before you notice the blood darkening Jio’s chest.

Kneeling at his side, Namjoon’s jaw clenches while attempting to Channel. Usually, Channeling is used to rend the body apart but in certain circumstances, it can be used to hold it together. Namjoon doesn’t wear much jade though and wasn’t trained as a healer.

“Allow me,” Jungkook says from behind you.

Dropping to his knees, he replaces Namjoon to clasp Jio’s hand in his. Closing his eyes, a thick vein pulses in the side of his neck. Despite Jungkook’s wish to enter the bloodier side of the clan, he would’ve made an excellent healer. His ability to Channel is better than anyone else in No Peak.

Jio’s aura, previously guttering, gradually smooths. Namjoon sits back on his heels, clearly spent from the effort. Wiping sweat from his brow, he turns to see you.

“Close the door,” he says faintly.

Reaching out, you obey and cross to stand by his side. Staring at Jio, you take in his bloodied state. Whoever tortured him was thorough, cutting just deep enough to let him slowly bleed out.

It’s a miracle Jio escaped, no matter how slowly his chest rises and falls. When you cross your arms, he coughs and cracks open one eye. Dazedly, Jio registers your presence.

“Horn-jen,” he rasps.

Briskly, you nod. “You’re going to be fine, Jio.”

Straining Perception, you sweep the ground for Yoongi but find him far away. Good. The further he is from this carnage, the better.

Glancing back, you seek Namjoon. “What happened?”

“Maro was waiting when Jio got home from his night shift. His wife had already left for the hospital. Maro knocked out Jio, tied him up and when he came to, started torturing him for intel. Jio managed to escape but hasn’t said how. Couple of Fingers found him in the Temple District.”

Your gaze moves to Jio. “Maro escaped?”

“Yeah,” he responds.

Stomach tight, you consider the options. Either Maro is still searching for whatever he’s after, or he found out from Jio and –

From across the property comes a surge of fury. No one else seems to notice, but that doesn’t surprise you. You’re more attuned to Yoongi’s aura than anyone present. Keeping your expression neutral, you know you don’t have much time until Yoongi arrives.

“What did he want to know?” you demand. “Did he –”

The door to the room flies open and hits the wall. The Pillar strides in, adjusting his cuffs as he goes. Yoongi’s dark hair is slicked, clothing immaculate as always. Heat curls in your lower belly, and you do your best to stamp it out.

His gaze flicks towards you, sensing your need before his expression shutters. Facing forward, Yoongi surveys the scene.

“What happened?” he asks, low and deadly.

His Pillarman steps inside and shuts the door. Hoseok leans to the wall, jacket falling open to reveal the handle of his Sig Sauer. It’s odd for a Green Bone to carry a gun but Hoseok’s job is to protect Yoongi from all threats. Although Green Bone warriors render bullets obsolete through Steeling, there are other threats best deterred by firepower.

On the couch, Jio coughs and attempts to sit up. Grunting, Jungkook grabs his shoulder and forces him down.

“Don’t be an idiot,” you say to Jio. “The doctor is coming, but if you die before they get here, you’ll be no help to anyone.”

“Are you sure it was Maro?” Yoongi asks, tension radiating from every line in his body. Even if you couldn’t Perceive him, you’d know.

Weakly, Jio nods. “It was Maro. Looks different now – leaner and wearing new jade. Scabs up and down his arms. But yeah, it was him.”

You and Namjoon exchange a look. Arm scabs could be a sign of the Itches, an illness caused by jade overexposure. Jade overexposure can happen gradually, or it could be caused by a single instance. For example, if someone were to go without jade for years and then put a lot on.

Green Bones are taught the symptoms from a young age. Severe mood swings, sensory distortion – shaking, sweating, anxiety, paranoia, and heart palpitations. When left untreated, the Itches can lead to madness and eventually, death. Better soldiers than Maro have succumbed to it, the lure of more jade greater than self-control.

The possibility flashes before you – Maro, unable to stomach being cut off from Kekon. He seeks out new jade, expecting to stomach as much as he used to. Instead, Maro breaks, paranoia and fear dragging him under. He starts to blame others, including the clan who took everything from him. A man in such a state might consider revenge his only option.

The hypothesis fits, though it means nothing good for No Peak.

“What did he say?” Yoongi asks. “Tell us, word for word.”

“He…” Jio breaks into a coughing fit. “Knocked me out. When I woke up, I was tied to my kitchen chair. I asked Maro what the fuck he was doing.”

“And?” Namjoon prods. “What did he say?”

“Said he’d been gone for too long. That it was all a mistake – leaving, taking off his jade.”

“Is that why he came back?” you press.

Jio’s head lolls. “He asked who betrayed him. Said he only told a few people about the smuggling, so one of them must’ve done it. I didn’t know,” he rasps, shaking his head. “I wasn’t one of the people Maro told. He didn’t seem to remember – or care.”

Paranoia. Another unmistakable sign of the Itches.

“What else?” Namjoon asks. “How did you escape?”

“I don’t know.” Jio frowns, blood trickling from a cut above his eye. “Maro seemed confused. He kept asking who betrayed him, and then mentioning treasure? He wanted to know where his treasure was. I don’t even know what he meant,” he admits, glancing between you and Namjoon. “His jade? I dunno.”

“It could be,” you say slowly.

“He’d ask about his treasure one minute, then accuse it of betraying him,” Jio says. “He said he went where his treasure was, but it wasn’t there. Or they weren’t there? He kept mixing up tenses. Wasn’t sure he knew where he was, half the time.”

Off to the side, you feel a sudden surge of emotion – there and gone before you can dissect. Startled, you glance in the direction of Yoongi but find him unharmed. Eyes narrowed, you watch a moment longer before you turn back.

“If Maro wants his old jade, maybe he meant his apartment. He could have gone there to search first,” Namjoon offers.

“A waste,” you say with a frown. “Maro forfeited his jade to the clan before leaving.”

Forfeited to the Pillar, more accurately. You glance once more at Yoongi, who doesn’t react. He continues to examine Jio, a slight wrinkle between his brows.

“All roads lead to me, it would seem. How did you escape, Jio?” Yoongi adds, casually changing the subject.

“Didn’t, really.” Jio coughs, the sound wet. “Managed to get an arm free, lunged for Maro and fell on the floor. Maro… didn’t really notice. He swore something fierce, stabbed my fridge with his knife and ran off.”

You stare at him in disbelief. “He stabbed your… fridge?”

“Yeah.”

“That makes no sense.”

“If he has the Itches, it doesn’t have to,” Namjoon murmurs.

“True,” you say.

This feels important though, in a way you can’t pinpoint. Maro didn’t have any trouble killing before – the only reason he’d leave was if he found what he wanted. Frustration gnaws at your thoughts, certain you’re missing something.

Outside, you hear someone enter the driveway. Gravel skitters beneath tires, the car coming to a stop as someone exits.

“That must be the doctor.” Yoongi turns around, seemingly lost in thought. “I’ll go let them in.”

Pulling open the door, he exits with Hoseok. You watch them leave, returning your attention to Jio.

Looking weary, Jungkook sits back on his heels. “I’ve done what I can,” he says. “Stopped most of the internal bleeding. He should live.”

The door behind you opens. “I’ll be the judge of that,” says an unfamiliar woman, striding in. Setting down a black bag, she looks around. “Anyone without medical training should leave. Now.”

Brows raised, you obey and take your leave. In the hallway, Jungkook mutters something about readying the car and disappears. You remain in the house, pacing and waiting for Yoongi’s return.

Namjoon’s eyes follow your tread. “What are you thinking?”

Shaking your head, you stop to examine a portrait of Yoongi’s father. “I don’t know,” you admit. “Something about this feels off. Why would Maro leave so abruptly?”

“He wouldn’t,” Namjoon muses. “Not unless he found what he was looking for.”

“Maybe Jio is lying. Maybe he told Maro it was Yoongi who betrayed him. If that’s so though, why wouldn’t Maro come directly here?”

“Here?” Namjoon scoffs. “It’d be suicide to attack the Pillar in his own compound. No way – Maro is smarter. If I were him, I’d set a trap. Draw the Pillar out.”

A terrible suspicion dawns as you freeze, mid-stride. This is the moment the landline rings and, crossing the hallway, you yank down the phone.

“Hello?” you answer.

Asha’s voice fills your ears. “Y/N? Is that you?”

“Yes, it’s me,” you say, turning around. “What’s wrong?”

“I have… well, I don’t know what I have.”

“What do you mean?” you press. “What’s wrong?”

Noticing your expression, Namjoon frowns and pushes himself from the wall.

“I went to Jio’s like you asked. There was no sign of Maro, so I went back to the house and… it’s strange. Maro tied Jio up in his kitchen, and there are signs of a struggle, but…”

“But what, Asha?”

She pauses. “Did Jio tell you what happened?”

“Yeah.” Your gaze flicks to Namjoon, who listens to every word. “He said Maro swore, stabbed a fridge and ran off.”

“Oh. Okay.” Asha exhales. “I was worried you’d think I’m crazy. The thing is, Maro didn’t just stab a fridge – he stabbed a photo. A person, to be exact.”

“… Who was the person he stabbed?”

Namjoon goes still, and your grip on the phone tightens. Pieces of the puzzle slide into place, leaving a picture which turns your stomach. Dread fills you, knowing what Asha will say before she says it.

“Yejun,” she says, and a loud ringing fills your ears. “She works at the same hospital as Jio’s wife, and there’s a photo of them at some ceremony. The knife… it’s straight through Yejun’s head.”

Heart pounding, you close your eyes and frantically sweep the grounds. Deep down though, you already know what you’ll find.

Yoongi is gone.

Fury boiling over, you realize this was the epiphany Yoongi had earlier. It must have something to do with the word treasure – likely a nickname between Yejun and Maro. Maro was looking for Yejun, not his jade or revenge. Or maybe it is revenge – stomach sinking, you realize what this must seem like. Maro told Yejun about his operation and soon after, Yoongi found out.

Maro wants Yejun, which is something you should’ve seen from the beginning. Yoongi realized before you and now, he’s run off to play hero.

“Stay here,” you say, turning to Namjoon. Feverish anger burns your blood. “Get Jio to the hospital once he’s stable. Thanks, Asha,” you say before hanging up.

Namjoon’s eyes narrow. “Yoongi went after Yejun, didn’t he?”

“Maybe,” you say, pushing past. “If he did, I’ll find him.”

You don’t remember reaching your car, only that once you do, you drive faster than you ever have through Janloon. The hospital is a logical starting point since that’s what Maro saw from the photo.

Shutting down your thoughts, you continue to weave through traffic. Thinking begets worry, which can lead to mistakes. Tightening your grip, you push the car faster. Roaring down the next street, you recall Yejun is working early shifts this week. She mentioned it the other day, saying how glad she was to be home in time for dinner.

Glancing at the clock, your jaw tightens. After a moment’s hesitation, you make a sharp turn, car skidding a little on the next street. If Yejun is already home, better to first check that she’s safe.

Yoongi’s sister lives near the hospital, an allowance granted with the understanding that your men keep tabs. While it’s unlikely Maro knows her home address, he could have followed her there from the hospital.

Parking swiftly, you leap from the car and sprint inside. Someone on the street protests, all bravado disappearing when they notice your jade. You skid to a stop in the lobby, zeroing in on the doorman.

“Floor ten,” you say flatly.

Open-mouthed, the man stares. When you start to move forward, he snaps to attention. “Elevator is out,” he blurts. “You’ll have to take the stairs, like the rest.”

The rest.

Teeth gritted, you pivot and take the steps three at a time. The climb upward is steep, and you use a burst of Strength to reach the top. Shoving open the door to floor ten, you come to a sudden halt.

Chaos greets you.

The hall before you is narrow, barely two meters in width. Yoongi and Maro face each other midway, moon blades drawn and locked in combat. Lunging, Maro’s blade slices Yoongi’s shoulder and blood splatters the floor. Hissing, Yoongi doubles his Strength to kick Maro in the chest, sending him flying.

Maro slams into a window, glass raining around him. Rolling Light, Maro jumps to face Yoongi, unscathed. Stomach sinking, you notice the amount of jade Maro carries. More than he ever had while part of the clan. Clearly, Maro is past the point of caring about things like the Itches.

His aura feels wrong where it touches yours, jagged and pulsing. Leaping and whirling with unknown motive, withdrawing to expand in nonsensical patterns.

Face contorted, Maro unleashes a series of blows which nearly has Yoongi buckling. Clearly, Maro has continued training in exile. He looks similar and yet different – his hair longer, beard unkempt to hide the scar on his cheek. His body is lean, that of a wild wolf after winter who fights more desperately because of it.

Steeling himself, you feel Yoongi pull his aura inward, readying for the next blow. Maro slips beneath Yoongi’s blade and slashes – and Yoongi releases, Channeling his energy outward in a deadly wave. The invisible strike hits Maro dead-on, making him stumble.

Gaze bright, Maro’s head whips upward. Sensing murderous intent, a growl slips from your throat as you rush in. Swifter than breath, you wrench knives from your belt, thrusting them upward to catch Maro’s blade.

He shudders to a halt, teeth bared in your face.

Yoongi skids to a stop beside you, disbelief warring with his panic.

“GO!” you yell, glancing at Yejun’s door. “Now!”

Yoongi hesitates before nodding, lowering his sword to dart inside. Maro seethes when he escapes, shoving with all his weight to send you backwards. Dropping into a crouch, you brace yourself with one hand and kick outward. Maro leaps to avoid the blow, landing Light with a fierce glint in his eye.

Bright studs of jade – some red and oozing – dot his chest, clearly done in haste. Maro doesn’t seem to feel pain as he walks towards you.

“You?” he taunts, half-laughing. “You’d barely graduated when I was chosen for Horn. Must be nice,” he muses. “A reward for fucking the boss.”

Biting your lower lip, you hold back your retort. When you do this, Maro smiles, lips pulled from his teeth.

Before he can speak, you lunge forward and Channel. Energy jabs Maro’s chest – enough to stun, but not kill. Grunting, Maro’s smile disappears as he Deflects. Bringing his sword down overhead, he leaves no room to dodge. Swiftly, you Steel and hope for the best.

Maro’s blade slams against skin, though he fails to draw blood. Springing forward, you strike hard enough to rend his shirt’s fabric. Pulling back, Maro seethes.

Your next series of blows are fueled by Strength, fast enough to elude normal vision. You rely on muscle memory and Perception, countering each of Maro’s strokes with your own. He’s not as fast as you are, but his additional jade gives him an edge.

His next Channel is clumsy but strong, enough to leave you winded and miss his next blow. You don’t Steel in time, his blade catching your jacket to cut your torso. Hissing, you stumble and press a hand to the wound.

The cut feels shallow but stings, nonetheless. Fury building, you hone your Perception to a narrow cone. Maro’s aura ebbs and flows, erratically bursting as he walks towards you.

“I don’t know why you’re bothering to fight,” he says, adjusting his grip on his sword. “If anything, you should join me, Y/N – I’m your future.”

Refusing to let him continue, you rush forward and exchange a flurry of blows that end in a stalemate.

Panting, Maro withdraws. “You have to understand I loved her,” he hisses. “I loved her, and she betrayed me. She deserves to die.”

“Who did?” you ask, although you already know.

Behind Maro, you see Yoongi rush from Yejun’s apartment. He holds her, unconscious, Yejun’s aura silent without jade ability. Fervent, you wish you could gauge her vitality. As it is, all you can do is buy them time to get help.

Sinking into a crouch, you draw Maro’s gaze.

“Yejun?” you prod.

“Yes,” Maro breathes, his gaze bright. “I trusted her, and she turned me in. Do you know what I thought about every day while in Shotar? Her. Do you know what she thought about? The clan,” he spits. “He’ll betray you, too, in the end – you’ll see. Killing them both now would be a mercy.”

“Yejun didn’t betray you,” you say to buy time. “She wasn’t the one who told Yoongi – he found out on his own.”

Maro blinks, his surprise evident for a moment before vanishing under fury. “That’s just as bad,” he snaps, his voice rising. “Yoongi and I were like brothers. Under aisho, doesn’t family come first?”

“Even family is bound by honor,” you say grimly. “Should I ever be disloyal to my brother, may I die by the blade,” you add, reciting the Green Bone oaths. “I won’t join you, Toh Marosun. Take me by force if you must.”

His nostrils flare but before he can act, you rush in. Dimly, you register Yoongi’s retreating aura and hope he’s managed to escape the building. Lightness and Strength blur as you move, Maro’s Deflection flung hastily forward.

You keep your blows unpredictable, swift enough that Maro struggles. Rage cloaks your intention as you whirl and slice in erratic patterns. Sweat beads on Maro’s forehead, Steeling wrongly for your knives to draw blood.

Sensing victory, you push harder. Gathering his energy inward, Maro lashes out suddenly in a Channel you barely Deflect. Energy rips through you, searing your bones in a silent attack. Wincing, you leap back and Channel a blow. Maro stumbles, barely shielding and you recognize a flaw.

There are few Green Bones in Shotar, which must make it difficult for him to practice Deflection. Pressing the advantage, you move forward in a quick flurry of blows. Although Maro’s sword is larger, your knives gain the advantage in the small space. He can’t move when you duck underneath, stabbing upward to pierce his soft underarm.

Howling, Maro whirls and swings at you rashly. Leaning backwards, you Steel and catch the blow on your forearm. Vibrations clang through you, rattling the teeth in your skull. The two of you lock together, Maro’s energy clashing with yours. When he doubles his Strength, you feel your Steel buckle.

Lips split in a grin, Maro keeps his sword steady. Further increasing his Strength, he’s focused on winning he doesn’t notice the shift in your aura.

Dropping your Steel, you draw everything inward and let his sword slice your arm. Maro’s laugh is manic – until you Channel outward. The last of your energy shatters his Deflection, piercing inner organs with deadly precision. You feel the moment Maro’s heart stops, his arteries rupturing from the inside out.

Forgoing any mercy, your knife slashes his throat in a clean line.

Blood mists from the wound, coating the wall behind you in red. With a gurgled gasp, Maro lifts a hand – only to go limp and fall, face-first on the floor.

Silence descends, broken only by your ragged breathing. Not far off, sirens wail, and you sense Green Bone auras closing in on the building. Eyes closed, you force yourself to breathe in and out.

No matter how often you do it, killing another person never gets easier. Even when necessary. Even when said person threatens your life and others. You fortify yourself with the knowledge that Yoongi is safe, and Yejun will live – she has to.

The cost to your soul is too high for anything else.

“Is he dead?” asks someone behind you.

Swiftly, you turn as you open your eyes. You were so focused inward, you failed to notice Yoongi’s aura approach. The Pillar’s gaze snags, stopping on the man before you.

“Yes,” you say, bending to clean your knives. Heart hammering, you wonder what Yoongi feels at seeing his former friend dead. Wonder if he’ll blame you, as Maro said.

Setting your jaw, you sheath both your knives before standing. Immediately, you see you needn’t have worried. Yoongi isn’t looking at Maro, but at you. A lone muscle tics in his jaw, observing the crimson blood staining your clothes.

“The police are on their way. They’ll clean up the scene. You’re hurt,” Yoongi adds, his voice thick.

You glance down at your arm. “It’s nothing.”

Bending again, you begin to gather Maro’s jade. You’ll be expected to wear it the next time you’re in public, but right now, the touch of it is nearly overwhelming. Minor wounds and injuries pulse with each movement, already healing from your current jade.

“I’ll take it.” Yoongi suddenly is beside you, right hand extended. “Let me help.”

Relinquishing some of the jade piercings, you slide the rest in your pockets and push yourself to stand. Turning to face him, you stride down the hall. A roiling ball of emotion settles deep in your gut.

Worry about Yejun. Fury at Yoongi’s lies. Relief, that he’s here and unharmed.

Entering the stairwell, the door hits the wall with a satisfying thud. Yoongi follows closely, wisely choosing to remain silent. Two stories lower, you find the words to speak.

“Is Yejun okay?” you ask.

You feel Yoongi’s gaze on the back of your neck. “She’ll live,” he says, sounding weary. “I left her at the hospital with Namjoon and Jiro. She has a concussion. Maro got here a few minutes before I did and had already roughed her up.”

Something about this snaps the hold on your fragile self-control. Picturing what might have happened had you arrived a few seconds later, you whirl around and grasp Yoongi by his suit jacket.

“Never,” you blurt, yanking him closer. “Never do that to me again.”

Gaze burning, you stare him down and Yoongi watches warily. He doesn’t move an inch, allowing you to manhandle him. “I know that you’re angry,” he says carefully.

With a harsh laugh, you release him. “Of course, I am! You shouldn’t have come here alone.”

“I know that.”

“Well?” you demand after a long moment passes. “Aren’t you going to apologize?”

Yoongi lifts a brow. “I’d do it again.”

You stare at him, aghast. “Well, then.” You pause. Shake your head. “If that’s all you have to say, I think this night is over.”

Wiping your palms on your pants, you turn away. You only make it one flight before Yoongi’s hand finds your elbow.

Spinning you towards him, Yoongi pulls you closer. You manage to avoid eye contact until his fingers slip beneath your chin, making you face him.

“I know you want me to apologize, but I won’t,” he says lowly. “I refuse to apologize for trying to keep you from danger.”

Most people would swoon, hearing this from their lover but you aren’t most people. You’re the Horn of No Peak, sworn to protect the clan – and Yoongi – from any threats.

Your gaze narrows on his. “That’s a problem, then. I’m your Horn, Yoongi. It’s my duty to protect No Peak – to protect you. The Pillar is the spine of this clan and, once severed, No Peak can’t survive. It can survive without me, though.”

Yoongi’s nostrils flare. “And what about me?” he asks. “If you don’t survive, how do you expect me to continue?”

You go still. “Yoongi… I…”

“And for that matter,” he adds, his hand on your chin sliding to the back of your neck. “If you’re so intent on following the rules, who are you to give me orders? I’ll fight to protect the clan if I want to, Y/N.”

Fury expands from the spark in your chest. “You didn’t make me your Horn to follow you blindly,” you seethe.

“No.” His gaze softens. “I did not.”

You stare at each other for a long moment, each passing second draining some of your fire. You’re left with smoke on your tongue, a heaviness in your heart and the ever-growing certainty the time for rule-following has passed.

“You… can’t think like that,” you say eventually.

Yoongi’s brow sketches upward. “Like what?”

“Like I’m worth more than the clan. More than you, as it’s Pillar. That’s dangerous precedent.”

“I don’t care.”

“Well, I do,” you say, frustrated by his nonchalance. “The clan is my blood, and the Pillar is its master,” you add, reciting your oaths again. “You are the Pillar. Your life is that of the clan.”

Yoongi’s lips twist with displeasure. “It seems we’re at an impasse, since I refuse to place my life before yours.”

“Yoongi,” you snap, exasperated. “You can’t just… just –”

“Just what?” His eyes blaze. “Love you?”

“Yes,” you whisper, voice breaking.

Something in his face gentles. “I’m afraid it’s too late for that.”

Perceiving this truth, the last bit of fight drains from your body. Sensing it, Yoongi draws you closer and pulls you against him. Eyes shutting, you lean into his chest. Yoongi’s aura swallows you whole, an oasis of calm against the onslaught of night.

His breath warms your ear. “It was my problem to fix,” Yoongi murmurs, sounding reticent. “She… Yejun didn’t betray Maro, but she was going to – that’s how I found out. She was writing a letter to me on her kitchen table. I walked in and saw it.”

Lifting your head, you regard him. “You don’t have to explain to me why you spared your sister. I understand.”

“Thank you. You should know, though,” he adds, his voice fierce, “I will do anything to keep those I love from harm.”

You can’t help but smile, though it quickly fades. “I know you would, Yoongi. That’s a burden you can’t carry alone, though. It makes you weaker, not stronger.”

“This was my fault, though,” he says. “Not yours – nor anyone else from the clan. It was my decision to let Maro go free.”

“You aren’t responsible for Maro’s actions. And it’s not weakness to show mercy.”

A muscle jumps in his jaw.

“It’s not,” you press on. “Who’s to say what the right choice was? If you’d killed Maro back then, maybe something worse would’ve happened. Yejun might not have forgiven you. It’s impossible to rewrite the past, and you’ll go mad if you try.”

Yoongi looks away, unconvinced. “What type of Pillar does that make me, though?”

“One who hesitates before killing their friends.”

“One who balks at making tough decisions.”

“Min Yoongi.” Steel layers your voice and you reach up, turning his face to yours. “I would never swear oaths to someone who killed without question. Who made decisions in anger, then regretted them later. You question me when you question yourself.”

His gaze roams your face. “And what if others betray me?” Yoongi murmurs, voice lower. “Would you continue to support me if I was forced to kill Asha? Or Jungkook?”

“I’d trust you did what had to be done.”

“And what if I become corrupt?” he murmurs, his gaze flicking lower. “What if I’m the one being selfish, betraying the clan?”

“Well, that’s easy.” Reaching lower, you wrap a hand around the hilt of his blade. “I’ll kill you myself.”

Not looking away, Yoongi’s hand covers yours. “You could try,” he murmurs, some of his tension dissipated.

“Oh, I think I’d succeed.”

Releasing your hand, Yoongi finds your knee and hitches your leg against him. “If it came to that,” he murmurs, nose skimming your throat, “I’d let you.”

Inhaling softly, you close your eyes. “Promise me one thing.”

“Anything.”

Perceiving the truth to his words, you open your eyes. Yoongi stares back, letting you see the starkness in his gaze. It’s no small thing for the most powerful man in Kekon to promise you anything.

Similarly, it’s no small thing to admit he holds your heart in both hands. Which is why you need to say what you do next. Without Yoongi’s next promise, this can’t go any further.

“Don’t make these decisions without me,” you whisper. “Let me decide for myself when a job is too dangerous.”

Yoongi’s lips flatten. “You give me an impossible choice, since nothing is too dangerous for my lovely Horn.”

“Trust that I love you, then,” you say, your hand trembling as you rise to cup his face. “And that I’ll do what it takes to come back.”

Yoongi goes still at your declaration. His pupils dilate so far, they seem to swallow the light. Four years, you’ve spent fighting together. Five months of knowing him this way, and never have you uttered those words to his face.

The transformation is quick, his expression shifting to desire in barely a breath. Bending, Yoongi drags your mouth to his. “Say it again,” he growls against your lips. “Tell me you love me.”

“You’ll become greedy,” you say, breathless.

“I’m the Pillar of No Peak.” He gives a half-laugh. “I will always want more.”

“Then, take it.”

Opening your mouth, Yoongi walks you backwards until your spine hits the wall. You lose yourself in his touch, his taste, the fatal heat of his body. Fingers tangling in hair, you’re rewarded by the basest of groans from his lips. Yoongi’s hands find your body, grasping and searching to pull you against him.

Far below, the faint pulse of jade auras brush yours. “Yoongi,” you moan, nipping his lower lip. “We should go.”

Pulling away, his thumbs indent your hips. “Go where?”

“Your place. My place. I don’t care.”

“I do,” he says with a grin. “Want to wake up with you in my bed.”

You can’t help but laugh. “You’re so needy.”

“I am.” His lips curve. “I need many things, Y/N. You in my bed. Eventually, in my house. Your vows exchanged for mine. But first” – his brow lifts – “I need to fuck you. Need to bury myself inside you.”

Lips parting, you attempt to digest this information. Everything Min Yoongi has laid on the line. The last sentence catches your attention though, heat curling in your belly and replacing all sentient thought. The rest can come later – first, you need him inside you.

“Let’s go,” you declare, pushing yourself from the wall.

He chuckles, low in his throat as he follows your lead. Halfway down, Yoongi’s arm finds your waist to pull you against him. His teeth scrape the skin beneath your ear, pausing to nip the highest jade hoop.

“Where will you put your new jade?” he muses, pressing his erection to you from behind. “You’re running out of places on your body.”

“I’ll think of something,” you murmur, Yoongi’s tongue on your neck proving extremely distracting. “Wrist cuffs might be nice.”

“If you wanted to be cuffed” – his voice dips – “all you had to do was ask.”

“That is not what I was referring to,” you say, although a shiver traces your spine.

“Pity.”

A second before exiting the stairwell, Yoongi releases you and takes a step back. You ignore the disappointment this brings, forcing your expression to neutral. Already, police cars are arriving to hold back the crowds.

From across the lobby, you spot Asha and Hoseok in deep conversation with uniformed officers. Moving towards them, you’re surprised when Yoongi takes you by the elbow.

“I ran into Hoseok in the lobby,” he says, steering you sideways. “He and Asha will clean up and meet us back home.”

Hoseok nods when you pass, his jaw tight in a way that implies displeasure. Swallowing laughter, you push open the door and immediately, your smile vanishes. Many people have gathered, huddled in groups around the yellow caution tape.

Catching sight of your reflection, you stifle a groan. You look terrible – sweat and blood mar your forehead, the rips in your jacket showing your wounds. Before anything between you and Yoongi can happen, you need a hot shower.

“The situation’s been handled,” Yoongi says to the crowd, pulling you towards the car. “Green Bones are searching the area for remaining danger – you should be able to enter the building soon. No Peak will compensate for damages.”

With that, he opens the car door and watches you enter. Expressions shift in the crowd, a wave of relief washing over the people. Yoongi joins you in the backseat, leaning forward to instruct the driver to go.

The car rumbles from the curb, its speed slow to avoid the pedestrians in your path. Grateful for the tinted windows, you lean sideways and rest your head against the cool glass.

In the reflection, you watch Yoongi retrieve his car phone. “Namjoon?” he says after a moment. “It’s done – Maro is dead. How’s Yejun?”

Namjoon’s reply is muffled, and your thoughts wander. Once you return, you should find Jungkook and instruct him to search Maro’s former haunts. There’s a chance he wasn’t working alone and if so, you’ll need to catch his supporters.

Tonight has taken a toll though, no matter how much you’d like to pretend otherwise. Exhaustion settles while you stare out the window, watching the lights of Janloon flick past.

Yoongi hangs up the phone. “Yejun is fine,” he says, and you turn your head. “Namjoon said she lost a lot of blood, but nothing that can’t be fixed. She should be awake in a few hours.”

Relief floods your body. “That’s good.”

His hand rests beside yours on the seat, close enough to feel the heat from his palm. Exhaling softly, Yoongi shifts until his hand covers yours.

Going still, you stare at your entwined hands on the leather. The car slows beneath you, coming to a stop before the Min gates. Another moment passes before the gates open, the car rumbling forward as Yoongi speaks up.

“You can take us to my place, Galo,” he says. “No need to stop at the main house.”

Startled, you glance sideways, but Yoongi doesn’t seem to notice. Never mind the driver’s raised eyebrows, or the fact that Yoongi just told him you’re sleeping together. While it’s true, you’ve slept here before, you’ve never been obvious. It feels as though a bridge has been crossed without discussion of what that means.

The moment the car is in park, you exit the vehicle and slam the door. Striding inside the front door, you unzip your jacket to hang on a hook. If Yoongi thinks he can share your relationship with others, you have every right to act at home in his house.

Technically, the Horn has a house on Min property, but you’ve always preferred to keep a separate residence. Your apartment in the city has served you well – except for the nights you stay here and sneak out the next morning.

Removing your boots, you set these aside. “We just discussed this,” you fume as you turn. “Ask me next time before you decide–”

Your words are cut off by Yoongi’s mouth, pushing you back until your spine hits the wall. “Couldn’t wait,” he rasps, shutting the door with his foot. “Need you. Now.”

Exhaling, you melt and arch upward against him. Grasping your thigh, Yoongi yanks your leg higher to wrap around his waist. The thick length of his cock presses to your center and you nearly whimper. Fiery anger dissolves into need – the need to touch him, feel him and wash away tonight’s fear.

“Yoongi,” you moan, turning your head. “I need to shower.”

Grasping your wrists with one hand, he presses them above your head. “Do you?” he murmurs, kissing down your neck.

“I’m covered in blood,” you protest.

Glancing up, Yoongi smirks. “And?”

Stifling laughter, you push at his chest. Obedient, Yoongi releases your hands to take a step backward. “Not to mention,” you say as you move past, “I’d rather not have Toh Marosun’s blood in your bed.”

Yoongi’s next action is quick, happening in the same breath. Catching your wrist in one hand, he pulls you closer. “The next time you say a man’s name in this house,” he rasps. “It had better be mine.”

“We’ll see,” you say loftily. “Now, let me wash up.”

Releasing you, Yoongi lets you pass, and you don’t turn around. If you did, you know you might cave and fuck him right there on the floor.

Entering his bedroom, you flick on the lights. Soft, muted warmth fills a room of concrete. Bulletproof windows overlook dense vegetation, invoking the feel of a post-apocalyptic city. Pausing in the doorway, you inhale his scent.

Although you’d never tell Yoongi – it’d go to his head – this room has swiftly become one of your favorite places. Watching dawn break in his arms has brought you greater peace than any of the gods.

In his bathroom, you help yourself to his fancy products and step under the spray. Securing your hair, you do your best to avoid the strands getting wet. Cranking up the heat to high, steam fills the room as you scrub blood from your skin. The water beneath your feet turns red, and then pink before finally clear.

Once done, you turn off the spray and wrap yourself in a towel. Straining Perception, you find Yoongi showering across the house. You’re momentarily surprised he didn’t try and join, although grateful he didn’t. After five years of knowing one another, Yoongi understands when you need time alone.

You’re washing your face when the bedroom door creaks. Drying your skin, you cross to the closet and withdraw a robe. Securing the tie, you wipe steam from the mirror before opening the door.

Yoongi sits on the edge of his bed, damp hair curling at the base of his neck. He’s freshly washed and changed into a plain shirt and trousers. In one hand, he holds a crystal glass of hoji, swirling it once before taking a sip.

Leisurely, his gaze drags down your body. When Yoongi looks up, his face brims with unsaid desire. Silent, he sets down his glass and pushes himself to stand. Watching him eagerly, you Perceive his intent when Yoongi prowls closer.

Coming to a stop before you, Yoongi lifts his hand to cup the back of your neck. Tilting your face upward, he strokes your damp skin with his fingers.

Silent, he lowers his face until your lips nearly touch. “What was it you said?” he murmurs. “About the clan being your blood and the Pillar, its master?”

Your breath catches in your throat. “You know the oaths as well as I do.”

“Yes.” Bending, Yoongi uses Strength to lift you against him. Gripping you tightly, he carries you to his dresser and deposits you there. “Well,” he says, lowering himself. “Allow me to show you who I get on my knees for.”

You stare at him, mesmerized when he parts your legs. Pulling your hips to the edge, Yoongi grips your thigh with a veined hand. The sight of him like this is downright sinful. Desire courses through you, setting your skin ablaze.

Yoongi leans forward, gaze meeting yours at the first brush of his tongue. You groan with relief, thighs spreading further. Lifting his other hand, Yoongi tugs at the tie of your robe. You inhale when it opens, fully bared while Yoongi’s tongue curls against your dripping sex.

He pulls away, eyes dark and casually spreads your folds. Muttering something that sounds like a swear, he stares at your cunt before lowering his head and sucking your clit. A dark moan escapes, weight shifting to get him even closer. Forcing your thighs open, Yoongi begins to flick his tongue against your swollen mound.

He doesn’t rush this, taking his time while eating you out. Yoongi flicks, and then swirls before sucking your clit. His tongue drags to your cunt, already dripping with arousal. Humming in satisfaction, Yoongi shifts on the floor and slips his tongue inside. Gasping his name, your fingers curl in the dark strands of his hair.

His tongue slowly fucks you, barely a taste of what’s to come. “Yoongi,” you groan, moving against him. “I need more.”

“Anything,” he says, pulling back to spread you with his fingers. Yoongi’s thumb finds your clit, casually stroking until your body quivers. “Take off the robe,” he demands, looking up. “I want to see you.”

Wordless, you push the supple silk from your shoulders.

“Fuck,” Yoongi breathes, staring at rounded breasts and hard nipples. Lowering his head, he sucks your clit again. Sliding a hand under your ass, he drags you close to the edge.

Gasping out loud, your hand fists his hair to anchor your body. In the mirror behind him, you watch your chest heave, hips undulating while he licks your pussy. Head tipping back, you lose yourself in sensation, each stroke of his tongue further coiling your tension. Yoongi is patient; he knows what you need and takes his time getting there.

Cupping his head, you move your hips while starting to ride his tongue. When Yoongi strokes your entrance and slips a finger inside, you nearly convulse.

“Yoongi,” you gasp, legs shaking.

“That’s it,” he murmurs, lifting his head. Curling that finger, he strokes a dangerous place. “Come for me.”

When his tongue resumes motion, you feel your walls convulse. Tighter and tighter until – everything snaps, a wave of pleasure cresting through you. Thighs trembling, you hold Yoongi’s hair while you cry out his name.

The pleasure slowly subsides, leaving you slumped on the dresser. Yoongi pushes himself upward, cock straining eagerly against the seams of his pants. Cupping the back of your neck, he kisses you deeply, allowing you to taste yourself. Parting your lips with his tongue, he dives into you eagerly, one hand slipping to slide into your pussy.

Groaning his name, you fumble with the buttons holding his shirt together. “This,” you demand. “Off.”

Using Strength, you send the buttons flying. Yoongi smirks, withdrawing and pushing his shirt to the ground. Touching his chest, you stare at him, unabashed. The lean lines of his torso, the indent of his v, the jade lining his fingers where he grips you tightly.

His moon blade is absent, likely the first thing he cleaned upon entry. Still, the hum of Yoongi’s jade is a potent weapon – nearly as much as the need in his eyes.

Lowering your hand, you palm the bulge in his pants. Jaw flexing, Yoongi lifts your leg to wrap around him. The roughness of his pants against your sex makes you hiss.

“Yoongi,” you moan. “Want to touch you.”

“I want that, too,” he murmurs, hair falling into his gaze. “More than that, I want to be inside you.”

Breath catching, you remove your hand as he presses forward. You feel his cock through his pants, rock-hard and straining against your needy pussy. Swallowing thickly, you managed to undo the last button and shove his pants down. Stepping free of their confines, Yoongi palms his own cock.

Replacing his hand, you give him a squeeze. Yoongi lowers his head to close his lips around a waiting nipple. A whimper rises when he tugs, switching to the other breast and repeating the motion. Arching upward, you lazily drag your thumb over the tip of his cock.

Eventually, Yoongi looks up and hisses, “Enough.”

Reaching lower, he guides his cock to your entrance. Leaning back on your palms, you lift one knee to allow him better access. Yoongi pauses, gaze traveling your face to your chest, landing on your cunt. Exhaling softly, your head tips back as you widen your legs.

“You’re perfect,” Yoongi rasps, flicking his thumb over your hooded clit.

Inhaling, you tremble from oversensitivity. Bending, Yoongi slowly spits to land moisture on your cunt. It drips down your sex, mixing with arousal while Yoongi pushes the tip of his cock inside. He pauses, watching your face, then adds another inch.

You arch upward, trying and failing to take him in deeper. “Is that all you have?” you challenge, goading.

Yoongi merely smirks. “Do you think,” he murmurs, refusing to move, “you can make me give you what you want?”

When he starts to withdraw, you tilt your hips, and he slides in a bit deeper. Yoongi groans as he fills you, hand tightening on your waist.

“Yes,” you gloat, brushing your breasts to his chest. “I do.”

Yoongi’s gaze flares, and he pushes in a bit more. “I know you, Y/N,” he murmurs, moving one hand to your neck. Thumb brushing your collarbone, he hauls you upright and keeps your thighs spread. “I know you want this pussy filled nice and slow. I know you want me to tease you. I know you want to feel in control but have someone else do the work. And I want – no, need,” Yoongi corrects, aura flaring, “to be the one giving it to you.”

Before you can respond, he thrusts forward and fills you with his cock. A cry leaves you, unable to do anything but take it. With your legs spread, hips tilted, the thickness of his length presses to your g-spot. And when Yoongi withdraws and leaves your body empty, you think you might cry. Think you might beg to have more of his cock.

Luckily, Yoongi doesn’t want this. Thrusting into you fully, he starts to move. Filling you up with his thickness, he goes harder and harder until you can barely think straight. His hips pound yours, filling you to the brim, making you take it. Fingers brushing the jade on your throat, he spikes your arousal and drenches his cock.

“Fuck,” Yoongi breathes, staring at the place he disappears inside you. “You’re amazing.”

“Yoongi,” you groan. “I need… need…”

“Yeah?” His gaze lifts. “Tell me what you need.”

“Deeper,” you plead.

His aura flares briefly before he pulls out. Before you can speak, his hands find your waist, setting you on the floor to turn you around. Spreading your legs, he presses a hand to your back to push you lower.

Gripping his dresser, you look over your shoulder while he positions himself from behind. “What about now?” Yoongi asks, slipping inside with one thrust.

Lips parting, you bend further and stick out your ass. Yoongi starts to move when you spread your legs, fucking you harder. His thrusts become rougher, hips slapping your ass while your breasts bounce.

“That’s it,” he says, leaning forward to lace one hand with yours. His other slides between your thighs, flicking over your clit. “So wet and tight for me. Taking my cock like you own it.”

“Don’t I?” you groan.

“Mm,” he agrees, rubbing circles on your clit. “It’s yours – I’m yours.”

Before you can respond, he pulls out again. Draping you over one shoulder, Yoongi carries you, Light, to his bed. You scowl, hitting his thigh but Yoongi responds with a firm smack to your ass. His fingers slip briefly between your cheeks, wetting himself with your slick. Before you can moan, he deposits you on the bed.

Kneeling between your legs, Yoongi repositions himself at your entrance and pushes in.

“Oh,” you groan, heading tilting back.

You love sex with Yoongi in every position, but this is your favorite. Feeling his callouses slide over our skin, his weight heavy while filling you with his cock. Yoongi’s length slides inside, rocking into you slowly while his hair brushes your forehead.

Reaching up, you push this from his face when he starts to move. If there’s one thing you’ve learned from tonight, it’s that these moments are precious. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you hold him tighter.

“Marry me,” Yoongi says.

You go still underneath him. “I… what?”

Sliding his hand under your hips, Yoongi tilts them to get deeper. “Marry me,” he repeats. “I’m tired of pretending. Tired of waking up without you. Living my life without you.”

“You have me,” you say, unsure whether he’s serious.

Slowly, he thrusts in and out of your body. “Not the way I want.” His eyes flash. “As not only my Horn, but my wife. I want to be your husband. I want the entire world to know I belong to you.”

Taking your other hand, Yoongi moves this to the bed while continuing to thrust. You arch against him, chasing his hips and words with your own.

“People will talk,” you say, breathless.

His gaze sparks. “Do you think I care?”

“Maybe I care,” you say. “They’ll call me a distraction. And don’t give me that bullshit about my life being worth more than yours.”

“I wouldn’t dare,” Yoongi chuckles, teeth scraping your neck. “What I will say is that I’m better with you. And if I’m better, the clan is better. Not that you should marry me because of that,” he adds, almost an afterthought.

You lose your breath when he circles his hips, driving into you deeper. Thighs parting, you lose yourself in the feel of him in you. His body moves as his soul does, completing you fully. In truth, you’ve avoided this conversation because you know how it ends.

It ends with Yoongi. He’s it for you. From the first time you kissed, you knew it would end up here – it was only a matter of when. Your remaining barriers crumble as you meet his gaze.

“Yes,” you exhale, your hips chasing his.

Yoongi’s aura sharpens. “Yes?” he repeats. “Is that… agreement or acceptance?”

“Yes – as in yes, Yoongi, I’ll marry you.”

Yoongi goes completely still, ignoring your protest. A second later, he’s consumed by a wave of emotion. Need – fiery and stark – sweeps through him as he bends, crushing your lips to his. Yoongi’s kiss burns, searing and marking you for one another.

Slipping an arm beneath your knee, Yoongi pushes upward to get even deeper. You gasp with pleasure, his cock hitting a spot that makes you incoherent.

“Soon,” he adds, adding Strength to his thrusts.

Breathless, your fingertips dig into his skin. “Don’t be greedy,” you chide, losing some credibility when a moan leaves your lips.

His upper lip curls. “I am, though,” Yoongi grunts, pushing you close to the edge. “I’ll never have enough of you, Y/N.”

“Good,” you say, holding him tightly. “I’m yours, Yoongi.”

A groan escapes him, burying his face in your neck. The muscles in Yoongi’s shoulders strain, fucking you harder. “I could die hearing those words.”

“Don’t. That’s an order.”

Yoongi looks up to lock gazes. “Whatever you want. I need it, Y/N. Need this – want to feel you come on my cock.”

Already close to the edge, his words leave you trembling. Clutching him harder, you widen your thighs and feel your walls shatter when you come undone. Pleasure consumes you, vision going dark as you throw back your head. Yoongi’s lips brush your throat, continuing to thrust through your orgasm.

Swearing when you tighten, Yoongi goes harder to chase his release. On his last thrust, he breaks, your name on his tongue as hot cum fills your body. Slowly, he lowers himself to the bed beside you. Yoongi slips partway out, your bodies still intertwined.

Lifting a hand, you drag this down his side. Yoongi smiles at you before pulling out, reaching to grab a tissue from his nightstand. He cleans you with care, then rises from bed to throw it away. Slipping beneath the covers, you wait for his return.

Yoongi does so quietly, dimming the light before he joins you in bed. Slowly, your eyes adjust until Yoongi’s moon-limned face becomes visible.

“Did you mean it?” you say, barely more than a whisper.

“I’ve never meant anything more in my life,” he says roughly. “And you? Did you also mean what you said?”

Slowly, you nod.

Joy floods his aura, sharp and bright. “Anything you want,” Yoongi says, determined. “You have only to ask. Cities burnt. Villains vanquished. My own name, forsaken – ask, and it’s yours.”

You can’t help but laugh, your whole body shaking. “Villains vanquished?” you tease, pressing closer. “There are some who might call you the villain of this story.”

His lip twitches. “Then, I’ll defeat myself.”

“Seems like an easy fight.”

Mock growling, he rolls to pin you underneath him. You laugh louder, the sound muffled when Yoongi bends to kiss you. By the time his head lifts, the two of you are breathless.

“I apologize,” you murmur, cupping his face. “Most fearsome Pillar.”

Baring his teeth, he nips your thumb. “That’s better.”

“Truly, though,” you tell him. “There’s no need to get me anything. Whatever I want, I can get for myself.”

Somewhat amused, Yoongi settles beside you. “Oh, I’m aware. My heart, for instance,” he says, placing your hand on his chest.

“That, I’ll accept,” you say softly, staring at your hand on his skin. Your gaze lifts. “As long as mine belongs to you, in turn.”

“A heart for a heart,” Yoongi agrees, moving closer.

Skin pressed to skin, you feel your hearts settle. No Green Bone magic ties two souls together. Instead, that magic lies within the bounds of normal humans. And yet, as you breathe and listen to the blood in his veins, you can’t help but feel something greater is at work.

Something even death could not part – although you’d dare it to try.

Author’s Note: thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed. Go read Jade City by Fonda Lee. LOL

#bangtanarmynet #yoongi fanfic #yoongi smut #bts fanfic #bts smut #yoongi fic #yoongi fanfiction #bts fanfiction #bts fic #yoongi organized crime #bts organized crime

1K notes · View notes

novelistrry · 1 year

Text

Her mouth gawked open at how casually he said it was like it was completely okay for her eyes to be ogling him like he was a piece of meat. Every single time he wore that shirt, she felt guilty for the ways her eyes could have burnt holes through his chest. Now, she was thinking he wore that shirt so often on purpose— to make her squirm. She tucked her face into the neck of her arm to hide from him.

“Stop hiding from me. Want to see your bashful face,” he pulled her face from the neck of her arm and placed his fingers below the underside of her chin once more so she wouldn’t pull away. “Y’know if you were one of the seven dwarfs, you would most definitely be Bashful.”

With an eye roll and a defeated puff from her lips, she finally gave him the answer he was hoping for, “I’ll go with you.”

As much as he wanted to be delighted by her response, he wanted to confirm that she was positive she actually wanted to go. He didn’t want to force her into doing anything she was unsure of, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Y/N stood from the chair and stretched out to rid the aches in her joints from sitting in one position for too long. “Do you think we could watch a movie?”

Harry is a young professor and Y/N has never felt this kind of attraction before.

Disclaimer: There is only light editing and it is smutty in this part!

Word Count: 14k+

Part One

The Spring breeze brushed Y/N’s cheeks.

Sprawling out on a plaid picnic blanket with her and Niall’s favorite lunch items was her favorite way to spend Sundays, especially when the park was filled with laughter, butterflies, and blooming flowers. Sunshine covered the entirety of the park, seeping warmth that trickled deep into her skin and bones, and she was soaking up every ounce she could get. Sunshine made her feel happy, and optimistic even.

Niall sat there with a book in hand, reading something for pleasure, taking a pause from all the educational content he had consumed over the past few months. It was some book that he begged Y/N to read, telling her that she would absolutely fall in love with the characters, but Y/N was too preoccupied with the tension brewing in her own life, not leaving much room for her to brew over fictional characters.

With a few snaps and a couple grunts, Niall managed to pull her from her reverie looking disgruntled as his book lay askew in his lap. “Sheesh, what do I have to do to get your attention nowadays. Dye my hair brown and curl it?”

That familiar heat that normally crept up her skin, penetrating her cheeks and the top of her ears rose once more, and her sheepish smile remained as she swatted in his direction, not actually able to nudge at him because he was a little too far. Y/N and Niall hadn’t talked about the bar a few weeks ago. He didn’t know where she snuck off to after school or why she was coming home late at night. It’s not that she didn’t want to tell him, Niall just hadn’t asked. “Oh, stop that!”

A teasing smile played upon his lips, curling just slightly and his eyes gleaming enough to know that a snide remark was going to be hurled at her soon. “So what, you spend all your time with him now and he occupies your thoughts when I’m with ya?”

Pink lips curved up, matching the same teasing smile Niall had displayed across his face. A shimmer in her eye had him realizing he wasn’t that far off the mark with his assumption, though she wasn’t keen on confirming that with him. A floral-scented breeze blew through her hair as she inhaled sharply, filling her lungs with the clean Spring air, resetting her breath and her thoughts. “How would you know if I spent all my time with him?”

In a fraction of a second, Niall was sitting a little closer to her, the book he was once enthralled with falling off of his lap and closing on itself, losing the page he had carefully left it open on. His arm extended to nudge her slightly, pushing her in the direction of that floral-scented breeze she just couldn’t get enough of. Dandelions were growing in the grass, rose petals were falling from the bushes that paved the park sidewalks, and blue skies hung over them. It was an omen of goodness, she thought.

“You think I don’t realize how late you sneak through the door? I can hear ya!” He wasn’t speaking to her in an accusatory tone like she was sneaking behind his back because she wasn’t. He spoke to her in a tone that says I’m your best friend, I just wanna know what’s going on in your life, so she decided that she would give him a glimpse at how her afternoons are spent.

“He’s been tutoring me, that’s all. He found out I was failing abnormal psych and told me he can help me. It’s completely innocent, but he helps me after school…” She trailed off, leaving out the details that he drives her to his apartment where they lay her books out on the kitchen table and he goes through each concept with her, or that sometimes when they’re feeling a little tired, they lay her books out on the coffee table and sit together on the couch, elbows and knees brushing. She leaves out the fact that she stares at the way his mouth moves when he speaks, and sometimes he gives her a stern look, indicating that he knows where she’s looking and she needs to focus on the subject at hand. Besides the subtle and gentle brushes of bare skin, and the fact that she sometimes stares when she shouldn’t, it was a completely innocent thing.

“But you don’t want it to be innocent, is that it?” Niall asked, the judgment-free from his tone. Curiosity was interwoven between the syllables, but there was no indication that he was judging her for her…. Er… Feelings?

Hummingbirds flew past them as she thought of an answer. A couple thoughts were swimming through her brain, but none that she wanted to share with him. No, she wanted to keep some of them private, just for her. She didn’t want to tell him about the kiss they shared, or the way her fingers would graze her lips the following week after their lips had touched ever-so-gently. She didn’t want to tell him that when she breathes in the citrus scents in the produce aisle at the grocery store she thinks of his minty citrus cologne, or how sometimes when he would lean in while she studied, her heart would thump a little harder and her skin would warm with a feeling she couldn’t quite place just yet.

“I don’t think so,” was all she said, not giving any other information. That is all Niall wanted to hear, that she knew she was feeling something more than a bond between two colleagues. If he was being honest with himself, he was a little worried for her. A professor and TA isn’t the worst combination, eventually, when the semester ended, she would no longer be his TA, but she had never expressed a crush even throughout undergrad. Hell, Niall didn’t think she had very much experience with guys, but that would never be an appropriate question to ask her.

“As long as you’re being safe, I’m happy that you feel so happy,” the response was honest. He was happy, though a tad nervous like mentioned before, but happy to see her so consumed with the sunshine, the flowers, and the hummingbirds that swirled around them. He thinks maybe, just maybe, her sweetened mood might be the force that brought Spring on so suddenly.

“Thank you, Niall,” she said slowly, “I am happy.”

____

“Are you understanding this?” Harry pointed to words in bolded letters that read mood disorders. His tongue flicked out across his bottom lip as he lowered himself from the couch to the floor, criss crossing his legs so that he was adjacent to the book Professor Smith required in his class (it happened to be the same one Harry required, so he knew the book like the back of his hand and it made the lessons with Y/N so much simpler).

A puff blew from Y/N’s lips as she eyed him, the words he was speaking weren’t registering in her ears. It seemed that with each passing day, she became more flustered with the proximity of him and more restless each time their skin brushed or she watched his tongue wet his lips— something she had never quite experienced. To her own embarrassment, she had googled the symptoms and Google had told her she was experiencing a kind of attraction she had probably never experienced before. Y/N thought back to the few people she had a crush on years ago and realized that they just made something bubble in her tummy, but never made her feel the way she felt when she looked at Harry. She felt so jumpy and jittery around him, she was beginning to think something was wrong with her. Quickly, she clicked out the tab and then cleared her search history, although she knew that no one was going to be able to look through it beside her. She just didn’t want to be reminded of the fact that she had googled something that made her feel so virginal.

It was true, she had only ever kissed one person other than Harry. She didn’t have half the experience Harry had, and she probably couldn’t even convincingly say she had a quarter of his experience either. The boy was named Kitt, and she met him at a summer camp they both attended in high school. At the end of the camp, right before she was shipped back home, Kitt planted one on her. She didn’t feel for Harry the same way she felt for Kitt, her relationship with Kitt felt childish in comparison. She wanted to feel Harry, really truly feel his mouth against hers. Not the way he kissed her in the office to cheer her up, make her feel better, and soothe the horrid thoughts that were rifling through her brain. She wanted a kiss where she was attentive, where she could explore every inch of his mouth, and where she could—

“Are you even listening to me?” He asked her, pushing his face into his hands. At first, she thought maybe he was losing patience with her, but when he nudged her with his elbow and sent an angelic smile (the kind of smile that would make a person drop to their knees), she knew he was only teasing her.

Embarrassment flooded through her as she was caught, once again, not paying attention to the concepts he was trying to teach her and rather drifting off into daydreams about him. The sun was setting, the natural light in the living room slowly dimmed as they shifted from day to night, and she knew that their time together for the night would be coming to an end soon. She should have really been listening to him, taking in each sound of his voice, the way his deep voice wrapped around the consonants and vowels, but she just couldn’t help it. Ugh, she just couldn’t focus.

“I’m sorry,” she answered him genuinely. She was sorry for not listening. He was taking so much of his free time to help her learn and she repaid him by not listening. How could she tell him that the way his eyes locked with hers, sultry and tempting sent her spiraling into daydreams she didn’t want to pick herself out of? How could she tell him that when she watched his tongue flick over his lips, she thought of the way his lips felt against hers and how she wanted to feel that again? She wouldn’t tell him that, so she settled on the next best thing and put her face in her hands to hide from his concerned stare, “I’m just having trouble focusing.”

With caution, he shifted his body and brought himself back onto the couch so that he was sitting next to her once more. Harry had been noticing the way she was in and out of their conversations, sometimes completely immersed and other times floating away so high that he thought he would have to bring her back down with a butterfly net. Usually, he tried not to make her feel too bad about it, he didn’t want her to think that she was upsetting him, because she wasn’t. But, this was the second week of her floating to space as he talked. Sometimes he would catch her right before she slipped into the reveries it was hard to bring her out of, but today she was long gone and he was beginning to feel anxious over her lack of focus.

“I know you are,” he reached over and hooked his fingers on the inside of her wrists, pulling her hands away from her face so that she would look at him. He didn’t want to treat her like a damsel in distress of any sort or like he was some hero trying to save her from her own thoughts— that’s not what was going on at all. He just wanted to understand her better, to figure out where her brain was running off to. “Won’t you tell me why?”

There it was again, that soft voice that makes her admit things she otherwise would have been so unwilling to do. Fingers caressed her cheek lightly; his fingers. Without much thought, she tilted her head into his fingers, begging for his touch without actually saying anything. It was dangerous, he knew it was. The last time he crossed a boundary with her, he told her it couldn’t happen again, and though she occupied most of his thoughts, it had been a month since the kiss, since he pushed her up against the wall of the bar and she licked his finger, and he wasn’t willing to cross that boundary again even though he wanted to.

“‘Can’t stop thinking about you,” she mumbled, her eyes fluttering close as his fingers brushed against her cheek in soft strokes. With so much delicacy, with so much precision, he gave her one last stroke of the cheek before tucking his hands in his lap. Y/N’s eyes which were peacefully shut as she soaked in the brief skin-on-skin contact abruptly opened at the lack of physical touch.

“I see,” his tone shifted to one that was more guarded, one that was less like the cheerful, sweet Harry she had gotten so used to over the past month. “You just really need to understand this stuff.”

Harry was trying to reason with her, he really was and she knew it too. She wanted to cross her arms, turn her lips down into a gruff point, and tell him that she wanted to talk to him outside of all the studying. Maybe it was wrong, but she wanted to get to know him for who he was outside of a college professor. There were so many things in his home that made her think that he was quite possibly the most interesting being to ever walk the planet. Vinyls crammed into a bookshelf that was absolutely not made for vinyl but must have run out of room for his records on the measly shelves you can buy at the record store. The furniture wasn’t your typical ikea branded nightstands and sofas. It was much more intricate like he had spent his days going to vintage furniture stores, trying to find the coziest couch that matched his bubbly spirit. Y/N had never been so interested in the ins and outs of someone’s life, how they formed their taste, or how they decided their career path. The closest thing she could think of was how she hammered Niall with twenty questions when they first met. It was purely platonic, never any mutual attraction between the two. Obviously, Y/N knew he was a little pretty, but she was much more interested in being his friend than anything else.

“I know,” she huffed out, furrowing her brows in frustration. A feeling of smallness washed over her, realizing that she admitted she thinks about him. A lot. Too much. And he responded by telling her she needed to understand the course contents. Of course, she knew that. “I’m trying.”

His lips twitched and though he knew he shouldn’t indulge her further, he liked to see her bashful gaze and the way she sucked in her bottom lip between her teeth and furrowed her eyebrows, attempting to give him the most thoughtful answer she could possibly think of. Honestly, Y/N was the type of girl that people could say was put through a time machine. She chose her words carefully, she picked her actions cautiously, and she was too mindful for her own good. But when it came to Harry, she felt so out of control of herself. It was massively infuriating.

Against his own better judgment he asked her the question he knew he shouldn’t have, “What do you think of when you think of me?”

She pondered momentarily, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth, furrowing her eyebrows, and searching the crevices of her brain for a way to respond to him. She just spent the better half of the lesson with him, thinking about his lips and how they felt, but she didn’t let her thoughts go further than that. No, she barely tried to think about the way her tongue licked from the base of his finger and then swirled against the tip because she could barely handle where the thoughts might lead to. She didn’t want to admit it, not when he was so firm about the boundary they set in his office a month ago right after the kiss they shared. “I wonder what you’re like outside of school and tutoring. I look around your apartment and see all these intricate things and beautiful paintings, and it makes me wonder how you spend your free time.”

“That’s all?” He looked at her incredulously, wondering why she was so shy about daydreaming about how he spends his free time. Actually, he would have even gone as far as to say that he was disappointed. All she had to do was ask him, and he would cross that boundary with her once more.

“Yes,” she hummed out, slumping her shoulders forward and resting her elbows on her knees, “That’s it.”

“Well,” he responded, closing the textbook but not before dog-earring the book to mark their spot (one of Y/N’s biggest pet peeves was dog-earring a book instead of using a bookmark, but she guesses she doesn’t mind so much when it’s Harry who does it). “Can I make a deal with you?”

“That depends on the deal,” she quirked one of her eyebrows.

“If I tell you that we can spend some time together outside of studying, do you promise to try and pay attention a little more?” He asked, giving her the best deal she could have possibly thought of.

“Of course!” Excitement nearly burst from the pores of her skin, and she didn’t have it in herself to be mortified by the way she responded with such enthusiasm.

“It’s a deal, Darling,” he reached out his hand and grasped hers, shaking gently.

That’s how it began. That is how Y/N and Harry began spending so much time together, going on picnics, seeing movies, getting coffees at the shop on the corner of where his flat was located, visiting flower shops, feeding the ducks bread at the pond (though Y/N googled it and found out that oats are much better for ducks because if you throw the bread in the pond, it can rot and collect algae causing harm to the wildlife in the surrounding area). That is how Harry ended up keeping a 42-ounce container of oats in his car just in case she wanted to feed the ducks.

____

Bright lights shone in the sterile atmosphere, and Y/N knew she should have been paying attention after being called out by Professor Smith just last month, but it was only partner work with Mallory and Mallory didn’t mind that she was dazing off back into that far away land. Actually, Y/N noticed that Mallory was too, except when she peered over at Mallory, her eyes were narrowed, her fingers were gripping the desk tightly, and it was like she could physically see the color drain from her face.

“Mallory?” Y/N questioned her friend, pulling Mallory from her thoughts. With care, Mallory set the pen on the table, then rubbed her eyes in a couple brisk moments. When she finally looked back at Y/N, she still didn’t have that signature warm look in her eyes. The kind of look that tells people “You’re safe with me.” It was gone, buried under deep gray clouds and Y/N could nearly see that the storm was brewing behind those eyes.

“I’m sorry, I have a lot on my mind,” she explained, her eyes still not meeting Y/N’s. The blank gaze was becoming alarming with each passing minute, and usually, Y/N didn’t like to push because she knew how it felt, and it was not a very good feeling, but she decided that she and Mallory had made good enough friends that it was slightly acceptable.

“Do you want to talk about it?” A question that was open, and couldn’t be classified as pushing because it was a close-ended yes or no type of question. If she said no, they would move on immediately and Mallory would never hear another peep out of Y/N regarding the subject. Prying just felt too invasive.

“I think Josh is cheating on me.” It turns out Mallory didn’t need any other pushing, because the words slipped from her lips so easily but with careful caution as she looked around the room, eager to see if anyone was eavesdropping on the pair (no one was, Y/N thinks Mallory just didn’t want the whole class to know her business, which was fair. She didn’t want anyone knowing her business either, but Professor Smith had other plans).

“Why do you think that?” The question Y/N asked was genuine, and filled with care. Y/N couldn’t imagine, what a horrible thing to think and how it must be weighing on Mallory heavily. Y/N thinks if she was kissing Harry all the time, and then found out he had been with other girls, it would feel like a knife right in her chest. But it was much different for Mallory. Mallory was in love with Josh, and from what Y/N gathered, Josh loved Mallory too. So how could he do something like that?

“I found underwear in the backseat of his car when I was looking for one of my earbuds that I dropped…” Mallory began gathering her thoughts, “they were tucked in between the seat and the floor, right next to where my earbud went.”

Y/N nodded in understanding, “I see, and you don’t understand why your underwear would be in the car.”

“Well, no,” Mallory explained, trying to get Y/N on the same wavelength as her. “It wouldn’t matter if I found my underwear in the car. Sometimes we just need each other so bad. The issue is that it wasn’t my underwear. I have never owned a laced pair of red underwear with pink hearts embroidered. Never.”

It suddenly clicked in Y/N’s brain. That wouldn’t make a lot of sense for Mallory to find a pair of underwear she has never owned in her life in Josh’s car. Y/N tried to think of ways it could be a misunderstanding, to reassure Mallory that maybe it wasn’t as it seemed. There was no way Y/N could spin it in her head that made Josh look less guilty than he actually was. He seemed very guilty. “Have you said anything to him yet?”

Mallory shook her head and pressed her cheek against the coolness of the wooden desk, “Tonight I will. I think I just wanna be in my thoughts right now.”

Y/N whispered something small, telling her that she understood and did not fault Mallory for not wanting to talk about it anymore. Maybe Y/N was a little relieved at that because she didn’t know the first thing that would make someone feel better about that. She couldn’t tap into prior experience, she couldn’t pull from when she was cheated on because Y/N was never in a situation like that. Actually, Y/N couldn’t stop replaying that sentence Mallory had said that awakened a realization deep in the pit of her gut, it was fizzling like a volcano was ready to explode. Sometimes we just need each other so bad, was what Mallory had said. Those simple string of words laced together helped Y/N describe the way she had been feeling for Harry; restless, tense, and she felt like she just needed him so badly every time she saw him. It was a realization that what she was experiencing was an attraction like no other, but how was she supposed to tell him?

____

Harry hated it.

If there was one thing he couldn’t stand it was miscommunication; plain and simple. Or in this case, lack of communication.

He couldn’t even tell you how many nights they sat down, side by side at his kitchen table going over the textbook (at this point he wanted to throw it through the window, he was so sick of it) and ignored the tension that was growing between them. With each longing glance, the tension was nourished. They were watering it, he thought. They were causing it to grow bigger and bigger until one day it couldn’t be confined to the four walls and they were just going to explode.

Sometimes the tension grew when they weren’t studying too. Actually, that’s where it seemed to get worse. When they were out and about, she would do subtle things that would work him up. Make him wanna grip her hips and pin her against the wall again, just like the bar. God, the bar. He pushed the thought down, but a similar thought began to rise.

“No, Harry,” she shook her head and tutted her tongue against the roof of her mouth. Carefully, she wrapped her fingers around his and encased his hand in hers. She was trying to show him the best way to feed the ducks. “This is how you do it.”

“So now you’re the professor?” He asked her, watching the bashful gaze flutter upon her features as she tucked her cheek against his shoulder. She began shaking his hand, letting the oats fall out from in between his fingers. He did understand it, though, the technique she was teaching him was a lot better than the technique he was using which clumped all the oats together. Now the ducks could pick the oats off the ground with space instead of cramming against one another.

“I think you can learn a few things from me,” She retorted, finally dropping his hand from hers. It was a strange feeling he had. The feeling that he didn’t want her to let go, he didn’t want her touch to fade.

“I think I can too,” he replied, tilting his head to the side, admiring her compassion and thoughtfulness. He thinks that if he weren’t there with her, Y/N would have the ducks eating from the palm of her hand.

But, finally, the lack of communication had reached its breaking point. He couldn’t handle it anymore, he needed to hear her thoughts. He just needed her to talk to him. So, he slammed the textbook shut a little too aggressively, causing her to jump and glare at him with frustration.

“I was in the middle of reading that!” Y/N’s glare persisted, but now her eyebrows were furrowed and her lips were flipped downward in a pout that told him she wasn’t happy with him shutting the book so abruptly and not giving a warning.

“Let’s talk,” he ignored the pout on her lips and the way her eyebrows furrowed in frustration. What he didn’t ignore was the way her fingernails nervously scratched at the table. Gently, he took her hands into his and shifted his body so they were facing each other. Her hands, still tucked tightly in his, were placed in his lap. It didn’t take long for him to note the way the pout wiped from her face as soon as she felt his skin against hers as if it was soothing for her hands to be in his.

“But you always scold me for talking when I’m trying to study!” She argued, trying to get to the bottom of why he wanted to talk. Y/N went through a mental checklist in her head of things he might want to talk about, but there was nothing so pressing that he needed to slam her book closed mid-sentence. She was finally passing Professor Smith’s class, she was keeping up with all her TA work in his class, and she wasn’t slipping into daydreams since her conversation with Mallory happened.

It took him a couple moments to respond. Instead, he admired her for just a second. She deserves admiration from time to time. Hell, she deserves admiration all the time. She was so cute he didn’t think it was humanly possible. If someone came knocking down his door and telling him that he was seduced by an alien and needed to report to NASA headquarters immediately, he wouldn’t have second-guessed it. He looked at her like she hung the moon, the sun, the galaxy, and everything in between.

“Will you quit staring,” she grumbled shyly.

“I just want to know how you feel, that’s all.” He was trying to be as straightforward as possible.

____

He wanted to know how she felt? Since her conversation with Mallory, she tried to find the words she would tell him. Y/N knew it wasn’t healthy to keep it bottled up and locked away. In fact, with each passing day, she felt like she was going to burst. Eventually, they were going to have this talk and she knew it was coming. No matter how much she thought about it, she didn’t think she would ever fully prepare for it. Obviously, after she and Harry shared the kiss, they talked about it and how it couldn’t ever happen again, but besides that, they both chose to ignore that it ever happened.

She popped her mouth open ready for the words to come out, but when they didn’t, she closed her mouth once more. Y/N did this a few more times, noting how patient Harry was with her. She thinks she might be the luckiest girl to be able to talk to someone so patient and kind.

“I was talking with Mallory,” Harry stiffened at the sound of Mallory’s name so she quickly revised the thoughts that poured from her brain and straight out the fountain that was her mouth, “Not about us! About her and her boyfriend. She thinks he’s cheating on her, but she hasn’t gotten to talk to him yet…” Y/N’s words faded out as she tried to figure out how to phrase this without sounding needy.

Y/N decided the best way was to start from the beginning, so she continued with her story, “Mallory said she dropped an earbud, so she was looking in the backseat of her boyfriend's car for it and found a pair of underwear that didn’t belong to her. Well, at first I thought it was because why would there be underwear in his car, but then she explained it wouldn’t have been that weird to find her underwear in his car because I guess sometimes they sleep together in the car. She told me they only did that when they felt like they needed each other badly,” she paused momentarily, once again trying to locate the words. “I think that’s how I feel about you. A strong desire.”

A strong desire? What was she thinking? She replayed the words, feeling so stupid for even saying them out loud. Y/N had admitted that she desired him but didn’t think he would return that same desire. How could he? The look on his face was unreadable, and she was suddenly hyper-aware of the room around them. She could feel the lights penetrating through the top layer of skin warming her up, she could hear the sound of the fireplace under his television crackling, and she could see the way his eyes flickered between her mouth and then back to her pupils. She may have messed up something go—

As if he was plucking a delicate flower from the grass, he pulled her body closer to him. She was off the chair and back in his lap in mere seconds, the same way she was back in his office when they shared the first kiss. Completely straddling him on the dining room chair, she was all too aware of how exposed she was in his position. She was reminded of the feel of his thighs between her legs once more. This time the kiss wasn’t gentle and filled with tears, it was more longing and wet. He pinched the sides of her hips with a such delicate precision that her mouth dropped open, just slightly to let him in.

Her prior kisses played on a loop in her mind. They had never felt like this before. This was pure desire, no doubt about it. His tongue caressed the inside of her mouth, and he tasted like the juice he was drinking as they studied. A soft and subtle notion of cranberry filled her mouth, and when she took a deep breath through her nose, she smelled his minty citrus signature scent.

Tongues colliding, she felt as if she could transcend from her body. And for a second, she thought she may have left her body and watched the two of them go at it from an outside perspective. It was sensual the way they moved together as if the two of them were one and the same. A piece of art carved from the same stone.

When his tongue retreated back to his own mouth, allowing her to feel the inside of his, she let a small moan escape, the vibration snaking its way up her throat and into his mouth. He could have melted then and there. The sound embarrassed her just a little bit. The moan—or whimper, really— was filled with such desperation and corrupt desire she couldn’t help but feel a small twinge of shame in the pit of her gut.

She pulled away, her face burying into his chest so that she couldn’t see the look on his face. “Sorry.”

He stroked his fingers up and down her sides, slipping beneath her shirt to feel her skin and she let out a small gasp at the feel of his fingers brushing against her sides. “What are you sorry for, baby?”

“You said we couldn’t do it again, remember?” She tacked on the end of her sentence to jog his memory. As if he had forgotten what he told her in his office a month ago about how they needed to place a boundary. Clearly, it wasn’t going to work so why deny them the pleasure of each other’s company even further?

“Is this what you want?” He pulled her face from his chest, using one of his fingers to support the underside of her chin. At this moment, he wanted eye contact with her, he wanted to make sure she was telling him what she wanted. He didn’t want to guess or have to read between the lines; he had to know. Did she want him?

“I want this,” she puffed out a breath, sleepily fluttering her eyes. “Really, I want this.”

“I think,” he breathes slowly, bringing his finger to her lips and wiping off the residue of his mouth. He had half a mind to leave it there for him to admire under the dim kitchen light, “I want to do this with you too. We just have to be careful.”

“Right,” her sleepy eyes settled upon his brown curls. “No one can find out.”

“It’s not that,” he shook his head and grasped her hands once more, bringing their hands enclosed together to his chest. She could feel the thump of his heart against her chest, “I want to protect you here.” And she knew he meant her heart.

Stars circled around them, enclosing them in their own bubble against the word. It was at this moment she took the time to look at him, really truly see him for what he was. She had done it once before when she first met him, but she tried not to do it again to keep her heart from fluttering at an alarmingly fast rate. But now she felt like she could appreciate his beauty for what it was; she was comfortable with that. Harry’s jaw was sharp and clean-cut like he was cut from stone. The apples of his cheeks were kissed by angels, pink and rosy. His eyes were a clear green, the type of green that flourished in the forest and faeries hid in. He wasn’t just handsome. No, he was more than that. Truly, he was beautiful. A spark twitched in her chest, an appreciation that he wanted her the same way, too.

“Stop looking at me that way,” amusement flickered in his eyes, but longing swam in his bones as her gaze studied the intricacies of his facial features.

Confusion appeared on her face, “What do you mean?”

“Stop lookin’ at me like I hung the moon and the stars, and make the earth spin on its axis.” He was only teasing her, and it was something she was still trying to get used to. Sometimes, Y/N was a very literal person, and couldn’t pick up on teasing or sarcasm on the first go. She had to dissect the conversation a little more before she could be certain teasing and sarcasm were at play.

“I think you did,” she hummed and his chest thumped faster against her hands. Y/N liked that she was making him do that.

Rose-colored blush presented on his cheeks, and with a successful feeling stirring inside her, she pressed a kiss to the tops of each cheek.

“Do you think I could tell Mallory?” If there was one person Y/N wanted to tell, it was Mallory. Well, Niall too, but she knew that she didn’t need to ask Harry about that. It’s not like Niall was one of his TAs too.

“Yes, Sweetheart. I think that would be fine,” without hesitation, his lips collided with hers once more, but the words he murmured when he pulled away caused a breath to catch in her throat, “You’re very pretty.”

____

Tomato sandwiches were currently Y/N’s hyper-fixation meal, and as Mallory talked and Y/N listened (no surprise there), she gnawed on the edge of her sandwich.

The pair had been eating lunch together in the cafeteria. Mallory was fighting a rough breakup, and Josh would not stop texting her. At one point, Mallory handed Y/N her phone and told her to just scroll through. It was a series of apologies, ‘it will never happen again’, and ‘I need you.’ Y/N was proud that Mallory basically told him to swim in the stream of his own tears, then blocked him. After Josh realized Mallory blocked him from texting her, he moved to other forms of communication, but this time he was no longer texting her apologies and they were actually quite alarming messages.

“Do you wanna hear what I think?” Y/N asked before giving unsolicited advice. If Mallory didn’t want to hear what Y/N was thinking, she wouldn’t just spring that information onto her. Through the course of the past couple of weeks, Y/N began collecting her thoughts on the situation. She didn’t want to give advice or put in her two cents prematurely, but as the situation between Mallory and Josh got worse and worse, Y/N was sure her thoughts on him wouldn’t change.

“Of course I do. You’re my friend,” Mallory insisted, waiting for her to give some humbling advice. It wasn’t often Y/N asked Mallory if she could offer her thoughts on the situation. As time went on, Mallory noted that Y/N wasn’t the talkative type. While she always had great things to add to the conversation, if she didn’t want to speak then she wouldn’t. Sometimes Y/N only wanted to listen, and that was okay with Mallory. In truth, Mallory thinks they balanced each other well.

“I think you dodged a bullet,” Y/N said a little loudly over the sound of sports players rushing into the college cafeteria, heavy cleats clicking against the tile sounding louder as they passed by the pair trying to enjoy their lunch in peace. “And you’re my friend, too,” Y/N added at the end there.

“You’re right,” A sorrowful sigh escaped from Mallory’s lips, indicating to Y/N that even though she was right, Mallory was still sad about it. Y/N really, really didn’t want her to be too sad over a guy that was proven to be disgustingly manipulative. Maybe Y/N wasn’t the best judge of character, a little too trusting, but the red flags Josh was displaying toward Mallory were enough for Y/N to know that his intentions were not very good.

“What did you think of my friend Niall?” Y/N asked. After Y/N and Niall got home from their “double date” (she used that term very loosely), Niall wouldn’t stop talking about how funny Mallory was. He kept saying that she was better than the comedian they had all saw before the nightclub came to life, and that next time they should put her on the stage. He also kept saying that she was very pretty, and Y/N noticed the sheepish glances he threw in Mallory’s direction throughout the night.

“He was very fun to be around,” Hesitation was laced in Mallory’s tone, and if Mallory didn’t know any better, she thought Y/N and Niall were finally together. “Are you guys finally together?”

“No! Ugh!” Y/N threw her hands up in exasperation, dropping her tomato sandwich back on the paper napkin she packed in her lunch pale. “I want to set you guys up on a date. I don’t like Niall like that! Actually, I’m seeing someone. He’s not my boyfriend or anything, and he might not even really like me like that, but he likes to kiss me.”

Mallory paused for a moment, scrunching her nose and finally nodding her head in response to Y/N, “I would probably like to go on a date with Niall. If he’s chosen you as a best friend, I know he’s got good taste.”

Y/N’s cheeks warmed, “Well, then, good. Because I know Niall would like to go on a date with you.”

Mallory backtracked for a moment, the words Y/N spoke finally processing fully in her head, “Who are you seeing? And, I think the term you’re looking for is hooking up. If you guys don’t actually like each other like that and it's purely physical.”

Purely physical? Is that what she wanted? Y/N brought her voice to a whisper, glancing around to see if anyone was trying to listen in on their conversation (they weren’t) before murmuring, “Harry.”

Mallory’s face didn’t drop in shock, her face didn’t contort with disgust, but her eyes sparked with delight. “You might be the luckiest girl alive.”

____

“Now when you read this concept from the book—”

“Would you go out with me, Mallory, and Niall on Friday? We’re going to play putt-putt, and I’m trying to set them up,” Y/N interrupted him, surprisingly for the first time during their one-on-one lesson today. It wasn’t that she wasn’t paying attention, but about ten minutes ago, she realized her attempt to set Niall and Mallory up was going to turn into her being the third wheel. Now, there was nothing wrong with that, but she had a feeling once Niall and Mallory got their hands on each other, they wouldn’t take them off. If Harry agreed to come along at least she could use him to escape during the date, and it would be fun to see how he gets along with her friends. Obviously, Harry and Mallory get along well in a work-type setting, but she wanted to see how they could get along as simply friends.

With delicacy, he shut the book. If there was one thing Harry could pick up on, it was when Y/N’s brain was becoming overloaded with information. She couldn’t retain an information dump the way he could, so he adjusted to the way she learned best because all he wanted was for her to be as comfortable as possible. Sometimes he thought about the way, with teary eyes, told him she didn’t want him to think she was stupid. He never wanted her to feel that way again.

“Could we make another deal, Darling?” Harry’s fingers grazed the underside of her chin, pushing it up just a tad so he could get a full view of her face. Viewing her face in full was a must for him, he was constantly imagining that face when she wasn’t around.

“I am open to making a deal,” the words came out slowly, her head nodded with each syllable, and she tended to like the deals he made with her because there was always some sort of benefit for the both of them.

“If I come with you to see your friends, would you come with me to see mine on Saturday?” He didn’t want to pressure her into coming. In fact, he thought about asking her but decided against it because he didn’t want her to feel obligated. When she brought up the question about him tagging along with her, Mallory, and Niall, he thought maybe he was in the clear to ask her a similar question about meeting his friends, but then her face fell in what he thought was… Hesitation?

“What’s the occasion?” The pressure was applied to his fingertips as she glanced down at her hands in her lap, and she began picking at the sides of her fingernails. She wanted to meet Harry’s friends, but she was nervous about being around large groups of new people. At least when she hung out in big groups with Niall, she had him around her at all times, and by now, she was so used to Niall’s friends, it wasn’t uncomfortable to strike up a conversation with his pals.

“It’s a wine night. My friend Mitch is hosting this time. It’s basically a small party. We wear nice clothes, drink wine, listen to music, and catch up. It’s proper fun,” Harry was trying to make the environment as calming and fun as possible, realizing the hesitation on her end was just nerves.

“Nice clothes?” She questioned and had to physically stop herself from picking at her nails by grasping at the edge of the table otherwise she would make her skin go raw.

“Not super nice, just not sweatpants and jumpers since it won’t only be our immediate friend group. Sometimes we do that when it’s purely game night, drinks, and a movie,” he explained, and he knew exactly what to say to get her to agree so he added at the end, “I’ll even wear that satin shirt you like. You know, the one that has my tattoos peeking out. The one you drool over.”

With an eye roll and a defeated puff from her lips, she finally gave him the answer he was hoping for, “I’ll go with you.”

“Yes, I’m sure,” Y/N stood from the chair and stretched out to rid the aches in her joints from sitting in one position for too long. “Do you think we could watch a movie?”

“Anything for you,” he spoke softly and honestly, the gentle tone ringing in her ear like music. His voice was a symphony made just for her, “You know that.”

____

The words that tumbled from Y/N’s lips in the middle of the movie really caught Harry off guard. It was her delivery, actually, that had him furrowing his eyebrows and asking her to repeat the statement one more time just in case he heard it wrong. It was unprompted, there was no sign indicating that’s how she was feeling (specifically at that exact moment), and the look on her face was of shock like she hadn’t meant to say it; it just kind of slipped out.

“I said,” She cleared her throat and he felt her cheeks heat beneath his fingertips as she spoke. The pair were uniquely sitting on the couch. Harry was sitting with his legs kicked up on the coffee table, and Y/N was sitting with her head in his lap and her legs taking up the rest of the unused couch space. As they were watching the movie, Harry would stroke her cheeks or run his fingers through her hair just to feel her, “I would like to do more than kiss.”

If Harry was trying to keep a composed face, free of shock or confusion, he was almost positive he was failing. His lips and eyes felt too numb to actually realize how he was looking at her. How could he lie and say he didn’t want to do more than kiss either, he just wasn’t sure how to initiate it given their circumstances— and why would he deny her what she wanted?

“What do you want to do, then?” He spoke the words clearly, that lustful tone leaking past his lips and soaking her with it,

“I’m not,” she began, pausing for thought, “As experienced as you, I think.”

Harry nodded, encouraging Y/N to continue. He could tell there was something on the tip of her tongue, the words she was failing to formulate stuck in the back of her throat, begging to come out.

“Well, I just think...” she picked her head off the warmth that was his lap, “You’re very good at teaching. Would you teach me? I want to be good for you.”

It turns out that Harry was going to make her work for it, he was going to make her say the words out loud. His ego was slightly inflated by her gentle words, calling him a good teacher and asking him to teach her. Harry didn’t like assuming, but from what he was understanding, she wanted to teach him how to feel good and make other people feel good. Though, Harry didn’t think she would need much teaching as half the time he has to go close his eyes and take a few deep breaths to will his stiff cock away.

“Teach you what, Darling?” His fingers were grazing the inside of her thighs, telling her he knew exactly what she wanted from him. He was just slightly devilish, wanting to hear the filthy words fall from her lips.

Sighing, she moved her thigh into his touch. Begging, pleading, wanting... “Please don’t make me say it, Harry.”

“Are you gonna be a good girl for me? Hm?” Harry continued to work his fingers up her thigh until it rested just above the button of her pants where he was waiting to help her out of her pants. At this point, he was no longer assuming, he knew exactly what she wanted; she wanted to hit that sweet spot, she wanted him to get her there, to ride it out on him and hit that euphoric state right in front of him.

With a shuddering breath, she responded, “Yes, yes... I’ll be good. Just please.” Her fingers reached for her button, gently touching Harry’s own fingers, and her pants were off in a matter of seconds. She thinks she heard something about him saying she was so good for begging him for it, but the words didn’t register as he gently pulled her across his lap so that each leg was on either side of her thigh. Her wet center was directly on his thighs, and if she knew any better, she could have come right on the spot.

“Would you look at that?” His fingers strode up her slit covered by the fabric of her white panties, “I can see you straight through your panties, Darling. How long have you been this soaked?”

He prompted her to start rocking against his thigh, so she did as she was told and began moving up and down. The friction was enough to make her let out a noise she had never heard from herself before. As of now, she wasn’t embarrassed, just full of wanting, needing, and lusting. She would be embarrassed by her desire and the sounds she mewled atop his thigh later, but for right now, she just wanted to feel good.

With one quick motion, he was stimulating her clit, making her feel so many things, so many emotions, she could barely handle it. She continued to rock against his thigh, and if she didn’t know any better, he may have shifted his leg upwards so that she was getting the best possible access to his leg. This was going to be her new obsession; she was going to stare at his thigh at school and wonder what it would feel like for him to take her right into his office, she was going to drool over it while they studied and beg him to let her feel good because she can’t focus until he lets her come.

“Those are such pretty noises,” he commented when another moan slipped past her lips and her head threw back as he gripped her hips and brought her closer to his crotch.

She looked down, taking in his cock through his sweatpants. God, he was so pretty. Hard against the fabric of his pants, and the tip was leaking just enough for her to notice through the gray cotton.

He glanced down at what she was staring out, a smirk playing across his lips. She was simply everything. So good, so sweet, so attentive. “You’re gonna come just by looking at my cock through my pants?”

She didn’t have it in her to feel ashamed when she felt this good. All she could think about is how he would feel inside her, how his lips would feel around her neck. Even... how his hands would feel around her neck, claiming her as his own. In response to him, she just moaned and mumbled something— slightly incoherent, it took him a moment to decipher— “Want to feel your cock inside me.”

____

Harry was over the moon with the phrase that tumbled off her lips in her pure, unadulterated need for him. As much as he wanted to give her what she asked for. She was such a good girl, she deserved the whole world. He wasn’t sure how well she would be able to take it now. Y/N was already overstimulated by his thigh and his fingers circling her clit when she let out an unrestrained moan, threw her head back, and her thighs tensed around his, he knew she was going to come. But, he wanted her to hold out, just for a little bit.

He couldn’t help it; she looked so pretty like this. She looked like she was made for him, like a puzzle piece that fit on his thigh so well, there was no possible way the pair weren’t made for each other. Longing glances and looks filled with need had been exchanged by Harry and Y/N for quite some time, sometimes in between classes he’d have to give his cock a proper tug, otherwise, he would have been walking around stiff— and aching— for the rest of the day. He wanted her so much, it was unbelievable. But, Harry wanted her to make the first move, he wanted her to be sure this is what she wanted, and when she finally looked at him with that needy gaze, he knew he had to give her what she asked for.

“You’re not ready for my cock, baby. You’re so needy, hm?” It was slightly condescending, and what did it say about her that tightness in her belly coiled when he called her needy? He was right, she was needy.

“Can I move against your cock the way I am now? With your pants still on? Need it. Really need it,” Her words were jumbled together, separated by moans filled with desire as she moved in up and down motions against his thigh. He knew if he gave her what she wanted, she would come right then and there, as soon as her core touched the hardness of his cock, and maybe he was a little selfish for it, but he wasn’t ready for her to get there.

“That’s not how you ask, Angel. You know your manners. Use them.” The slight reprimand made her toes curl, and when he realized that she liked it; liked being reprimanded and it was definitely getting her off, he stopped her rocking motions by digging his fingers into her hips and giving her a pointed look; the same look he gives her when she’s not paying attention while she’s studying. It sent waves through her, and she felt like she was floating on a cloud.

“How do you ask?” He prompted, encouraging the words he wanted to hear.

“Please, may I?” She tried to rock once more, but his fingers kept her in place. A sensual gaze lingered on her features, looking him up and down like she could swallow him whole, and how could he say no to that?

“Good girl,” he brought her left leg over his other leg so that her pussy was in full contact with his clothed cock. Before she started rutting against him, moaning, and throwing her head back in pure carnal desire, he decided he would give her a little incentive. “If you hold out for me, give me ten more minutes of seeing you look so pretty as you rut this pussy against my cock,” one of his fingers moved from her hip where he was holding her in place to the slit of her pussy and worked it’s way over, slicking his finger with his wetness and popping it in his mouth to see how good she tasted, “I will let you watch while I run my hand over my cock and make myself feel good, hm?”

A jumbled yes came from the back of her throat, and he used his fingers that were against her hips to help her find her rhythm against his cock. He could have come right there at the sight of her, but he was good at holding off, good at edging himself. It was something he wanted to teach her how to do. How to get to that good place, then rip herself away from it. In the end, all of the frustration makes the orgasm worth it.

She tried to last, she tried to make those ten minutes, but she just couldn’t. With a cry, she warned him, “Harry... I can’t. I can’t wait. Please.”

“That’s okay, baby,” Harry comforted, letting her know that it was okay. He would teach her how to stave off soon enough, but right now he was more concerned with her feeling good and comfortable.

That was all it took her to that nice place. As her orgasm filled her body, lingering in her bones and warming her skin, she came against him. Pulling away as her nerves were overstimulated and sensitive, sweat beading at the top of her forehead, and mewling noises coming out of her lips. He thought she looked beautiful.

Quickly, she took herself off of him, not able to handle the overstimulating she was feeling in her core and in her brain. She tried not to look at the wet spot she left on his thigh, and directly on his crotch.

He could tell by the way her eyes averted, and she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear that she was feeling embarrassed, but he didn’t think she should feel so ashamed for feeling good. She should never be ashamed of that. With a gentle finger, he lifted her chin from her downward stare into her lap and whispered softly, “Don’t ever feel embarrassed about that. Do you see how hard you’ve got me?”

Heat flooded her cheeks, warming her skin, and that coil she felt in her lower belly when she first started grinding against the muscles of his thigh stirred in her once more as she eyed his hard cock covered in her wetness. “I don’t get to watch you now because I didn’t wait?”

How could he deny her what she wanted when she was so, so good for him? Listening attentively, asking politely, and being so sweet to him? “I’ll let you watch. We can call it a consolation prize.”

Heart fluttering, she shifted slightly so she could get a full view of this. His eyes darkened as he slid his sweatpants down just enough to pull his cock out of his boxers. It sprang out, the tip a blissful pink color, and she thinks that her mouth has never watered so badly. He was even bigger than she had been able to realize through his sweatpants, and it all made sense. He was sweet, but calculated and there was a rough edge of confidence laced in the way he speaks. The size of his cock matching the confidence of his personality wasn’t anything that should surprise her.

When Y/N let out a soft, sultry, sweet-coated moan at the sight of his right hand clutching the base of his cock and tugging upwards, Harry realized three things about her that he would dissect later.

Y/N had an extreme praise kink, thinking back to how she sucked in sharp breaths when he told her what a good girl she was, and how she moaned at the sight of her reward.

Y/N got off on a slight reprimand from him, seeking guidance and his stern words fulfilling something deep in the pit of her gut.

Y/N might have been crafted just for him, and he, just for her.

Just the look on her face was enough to make him come on the sight, but she had done so well, he wanted to give her a little bit of a show. With each movement calculated, he lifted his shirt just enough for her to see his abdomen then grabbed the base of himself and stroked upwards, using the precum oozing from the tip as a lubricant for his hand.

“Would you do me a favor, sweet girl?” He asked her, his eyes remaining fixed on her as he watched how her body reacted to his words and movements.

Eyebrows furrowed, she responded so sweetly and sincerely if his eyes were closed, he would have sworn there were droplets of honey dripping off her lips. “Yes,” she almost begged, “What can I do?”

Harry guided her head with his hand, gripping his fingers around the back of her head and lowering it so she was adjacent to the head of his cock. Eagerly, she thought he was going to let her wrap her lips around his so she moved her head a little closer, and when he realized what she thought he wanted from her.

“No, baby, not yet. I just want you to spit on it for me, hm? Let me use your spit to work my cock?” He knew the words were filthy, and he knew it sent a shiver down her spine. She opened her mouth, just a little so closely to the tip of his cock that her top lip just swept over it as the wetness from her mouth dripped down him.

“Fuck, baby,” Harry guided her head back so that she was sitting directly in front of him with a perfect view of how his hand brought him to his own tipping point.

He leaned his head back against the couch, eyes fixated on hers as her gaze didn’t stutter from his hand. A little bit of drool leaked from her lip, but she quickly caught it, finally breaking her gaze from his hand and looking to see if he saw that.

“Quite literally drooling over my cock, are you?” It fueled his ego, working his hand harder over himself as he realized what an effect he had on her.

Finally, he was there, eyes locked on her and reaching his pinnacle. His own sweet spot washed over him, ripping a moan from his throat and filling the living room air. Silky whiteness spurted from the tip of his cock and onto his abdomen, and she had to stop herself from leaning down and tasting him. She just wanted to taste him, but how could she voice that? The combination of wanting to taste him, the way his face contorted with pleasure, and the sound of his deep-provocative moan that gathered in the back of his throat and then filled her ears worked her back into that sweet place with no stimulation from Harry or even herself. As he worked himself down from his own orgasm, guilt washed over her face and he couldn’t help but give her a lazy-half smile. “What?” He asked gently.

“I think...” She shoved her face in her hands, the bashful person she was shining through what they had just done together, “I reached that spot again when you let that sound out. I just, I just felt so good.”

Eyes fluttering shut, he took in her words. “Baby, I’m so happy you felt so good. When was the last time you felt like that?”

Y/N just shakes her head, the words caught in her throat. “I don’t know if I’ve ever felt like that with anyone else— even... even myself.”

He just smiled, glad that he was able to get her there, and then hooked his hand under the backside of her knee, pulling her close for a sweet and simple kiss compared to what they have just done. While his lips were still pressed against his, he spoke, “I think we should get cleaned up.”

“I think so too,” Y/N smiled into the kiss, and Harry thought he would give up anything to stay like this with her forever. Talking with their lips pressed together, his hands all over her, and her hands all over him.

“Would you mind taking a shower with me?” It sounded so intimate rolling off his tongue, but that’s what he wanted with her—intimacy.

“I would love that,” his heart leaped at the realization that she wanted the same things as him.

____

“I’m a bit of a sore loser, baby, so please tell me you’re good at putt-putt,” Harry said as his hand grasped the steering wheel of the car. He was driving them to putt-putt golf with Mallory and Niall. Niall had decided he would take Mallory out to lunch before the other two joined them to get some one-on-one time together.

Y/N noticed a shift in their relationship after he had made her orgasm twice without doing much, and after she watched him tug away at his cock. She was more comfortable with him, more open to asking him questions, and Harry absolutely loved it. Just a few days ago, she asked him (without Harry having to work the question out of her) when she could taste him, and he told her, in the most gentle way possible, that he wanted to go slowly. He just wanted to make it special for her.

At first, she was nervous to ask him when she could taste him, not quite sure how she could voice the question, but as a few days passed, she realized that there was never any judgment or harshness in Harry’s tone.

“Well, I’m not very good at putt-putt. And maybe I’d like to see you a little pouty,” she reasoned with him. She always felt like she was the pouty one, maybe it would be a nice change of pace to see him pouting for once.

“Y/N, you know I could never be pouty around you. You make me too happy.” Harry explained, taking one hand off the steering wheel and linking their fingers together, and bringing her hand to his lap.

Y/N decided she was just going to enjoy the drive, and the simplicity that was her, Harry, Niall, and Mallory enjoying their afternoon together.

As it turns out, Y/N was really good at putt-putt, though she had never played before in her life. Niall and Harry got to talking about how they both liked playing real golf and made plans to go out some weekends together. It made Y/N’s heart turn, just a little to see her best friend getting along with Harry so well. They seemed like they were really hitting off (and not to Y/N’s surprise at all, she knew this would happen, Niall and Mallory were very much enjoying the company of one another). By the end of the night, they were sharing drinks and then spent the night tucked into Harry’s chest.

Y/N was happy. Very happy.

____

Y/N was not happy.

Harry’s friends were not as nice as he had explained them to be. Well, maybe it was just one friend that left a sour taste in her mouth and made her stomach fizzle with anger; possibly even jealousy.

The evening started off great. She wore a simple, yet elegant, midnight green dress, and Harry (as promised) wore that cream-colored satin shirt with midnight green slacks to match her accordingly. He ogled over her the minute she stepped out of his room wearing that green dress, looking as lovely as ever.

When Harry was done swooning and gawking over her, he led her out to his car and began driving in the direction of his friend’s house. Y/N noted the beautiful scenery on the way to the house, and when Y/N finally commented on the scenic drive, Harry explained that his friend lived in a winery.

“On a winery?” Y/N questioned, making simple conversation as they drove up a windy road with a narrow pathway, barely able to fit two cars. “Is your friend a vintner?”

Harry nodded in response, throwing over the occasional glance as he drove, though it made Y/N nervous for him to take his eyes off the road ahead of them. She trusted him though and didn’t make any comments about how the drive was making her feel. Part of her didn’t want to say anything because she wasn’t sure if the drive was making her feel a little queasy or if it was the fact that she was going to a party latched onto Harry’s arms. She was about to meet his closest friends, and even though he said they were nice, she knew she would be under a degree of scrutiny. She was coming as his date, of course, they were going to look at her with cautious-watchful eyes, so they could reconvene later in the night and ask one another, what do ya think of Harry’s new girl?

Before Y/N even knew it, they were parked in a round-a-bout driveway, and Harry was helping her out of the car. She must have paled on the drive up, because when he took her hand in his, and lead her up the stairs of the beautiful home, he leaned over and whispered in her ear, pressing his lips against the lobe, “Feeling okay?”

A nod came from her in response, and before she could even respond verbally, the person who was lingering on the other side of the door quickly threw it open. A chill ran down Y/N’s spine as she thought of Harry’s lips against her ear. They hadn’t done anything from when they sat on the couch and Y/N came on his clothed cock. She had brought up how she wanted to taste him, but they haven’t had the chance to yet, and Harry had told her that he wanted to take things a little slow. She understood. How could she argue with that?

“Oh, come on in before you two get cold out there,” the man standing on the opposite side of the door said to them as he noted the chill that racked through Y/N’s body. It wasn’t the cold wind, though the wind was colder than it had been these past couple of Spring days. It was the thought of Harry’s lips against her ear, and when she looked over at Harry and saw the way his lips curved upward in a devilish grin, she knew exactly what his plan was. He did that on purpose, he was trying to work her up.

Like Harry told her, the man lived in a winery and before she even had the chance to learn his name (it was Mitch she found out a few minutes later), he was thrusting a glass of red wine in between her fingers. She took a couple sips, mumbling something about how it was sweet, and without hesitation, Harry leaned and whispered something naughty in her ear, causing heat to flood her face and between her legs, “I bet you taste sweet, baby.”

They mingled, and Y/N who normally felt overwhelmed in situations like these was actually doing alright. It might have been the way the wine was starting to flow through her veins, or how genuinely kind Harry’s friends actually were (not that she doubted him very much, but you never know), but she was actually enjoying her time.

Well, she was enjoying her time until Harry ruined it by whispering the filthiest things she’s ever heard into her ears. In fact, she was beginning to feel flustered, because she wasn’t sure her panties could handle another bout of wetness before it started dripping down her leg. Her dress only hit below her knee, so if it began running down her leg, people were bound to notice and she didn’t think she could handle the shame.

So, she stood there, with her legs crossed, wine glass in her hand, and pouted. He could tell he got her there; to the point of frustration that she would burst at any second. Her responses to him were becoming short and pointed, bratty even. If there was one thing Harry could teach her, it was how not to be a brat. It was how to ask for what you wanted because all she had to do was say the words and he’d take her right into the bathroom and let her have that release.

When they had finally broken free from the conversation they were having with Mitch and… Well, Y/N actually didn’t grab the other person’s name because of the frustration filling her from head to toe, Harry grabbed her upper arm gently and pulled her so close to him that her chest was pressed against his, “Won’t you tell me why you’re acting like a brat?”

Disappointment donned her features. Was she acting like a brat as he said? If so, she really didn’t mean to, she just couldn’t help it. The words fumbled from her mouth quickly as she straightened her back just a little bit so that her body language didn’t look so dejected, “Sorry. I don’t mean to act like a brat.”

“I didn’t ask for an apology,” he stated and the sternness in his voice made her core ache even more than it already was, “I asked for you to tell me why.”

She gave in to his request, hoping that if she told him why she was acting like a brat, he would tell her what a good girl she was for listening. “I’m so wet, Harry.”

His cock throbbed against his slacks, and he murmured softly against her neck, pressing a soft kiss just under her ear, “So instead of acting like a brat, what should you have done?”

“I should have told you what was bothering me,” she guessed, not quite sure what the actual answer was, but it seemed good enough for him because his response was exactly what she was begging for.

“Good girl,” he pulled away from her, resting his fingers just under her chin, and hummed out, “Now should I take care of you?”

She only nodded.

____

The bathroom of the house was big enough to fit them both in there and when Harry sat her on top of the bathroom counter and hiked her dress out, he grumbled out a “Fuck, Y/N.”

She wasn’t being dramatic when she said she was so wet. If he kept her out there for five more minutes, she would have dripped down her leg, and Harry doesn’t know what it says about him the fact that that turns him on so greatly. For his friends to see just how much of a reaction she has to him. How his words can get her mewling and thrashing and moaning.

Quickly, he tugged her panties off and shoved them into his pocket. She was still up on the counter, watching his movements with lust-filled eyes, and leaking onto his wrist that he had pressed against her center. His hand was gripping the counter, the inside of his wrist pressing against her and when he moved, even slightly, she would let out small, sharp gasps. “Can I touch you?”

“Please,” she responded, and that was all he needed before he began working her to that special spot. His fingers, covered in rings, slipped inside her slowly, so slowly it was agonizing. He didn’t need her to lick his fingers, offering that extra lubricant because she was so wet that she was soaking the counter. He flicked his fingers upward, hitting that soft spot inside her, and when he finally found it, her eyes widened, as she had never been stimulated there before. It only took a few motions in and out of her, before her walls began squeezing around his fingers. Right before she was about to come, about to hit the peak of her orgasm, he pulled his fingers out of her.

Eyebrows furrowed, she questioned his actions, “Why did you do that?”

“I’m not ready for you to orgasm just yet,” he said softly, his green eyes glimmering with want and need.

“Please?” She asked, “I-I need it!”

Normally, she would feel embarrassed by her begging, but right now she didn’t have it in her to feel embarrassed. The only thing she had in her was that she wanted that orgasm to encompass her, sending her body to that place she went when she was rutting against her thigh.

She was so beautiful and so lovely that he couldn’t deny her of that, and he knew it, so he slipped his fingers back into her with careful precision and stimulated that soft spot inside her once more. She let out soft moans filled with nothing but desire, and she squeezed around his fingers once more before letting her orgasm rip through her. He worked her down with his fingers, and when she looked up at him with a sleepy gaze, he knew she was feeling much better; the frustration completely obliterated from his body.

Although, when he brought his fingers, covered in her wetness to his lips, licked it off with his tongue, and said, “I was right. You do taste sweet,” she thinks she could have gone again.

Harry helped her get her panties back on, and hop off the counter of the bathroom, promising that when they got home he was going to help her shower the stickiness from in between her thighs and take good care of her. She knew she was safe with him, and it was possibly one of her favorite feelings in the entire world.

“Why don’t you go back out there, love? I’ll clean up here and be right out.” He bargained with her, and she followed his instructions because it probably wouldn’t look too good if the both of them slipped from the bathroom at the same time.

Harry’s plan was to clean up, but he had to relieve himself somehow too.

____

Y/N’s eyes searched the room, and she found the girl she was chatting with earlier— Colette was her name, she finally remembered and blamed the sexual frustration on her jumbled brain and her post-orgasmic state on her clarity over Colette’s name.

Across the room, Colette sat with a few other girls, and Y/N thought that the best thing to do while Harry was cleaning up in the bathroom was to make her way over there and hop in the conversation, so that is exactly what she did.

She sat directly next to Colette, and jumped into their conversation a few times, adding a few things here and there to keep herself present in the conversation. It wasn’t until Harry finally slipped from the bathroom, signaling that he was going to get them a drink that she felt a sense of relief.

One of the girls next to Colette’s eyes followed Y/N’s to Harry and when she saw what Y/N was looking at she interjected with a, “Don’t even bother with him. He’s a nice guy, but he’s not the relationship type. He only fucks, but nothing else. Trust me, I’ve tried. Also, the rumor is that he brought a girl with him this time around, and good luck to her, because she doesn’t know what she’s in for.”

Y/N’s mouth dropped open in pure shock, and Colette’s face whitened as she grasped Y/N’s hand, “Emma!” Colette said in a harsh whisper, “Why would you say that?”

Colette helped Y/N up, and Y/N couldn’t even feel mad at the girl— Emma, she guessed— because it was not like she knew that Y/N was the girl Harry brought along with him tonight. Her stomach dropped, feeling icky and displaced as she walked alongside Colette and toward the kitchen where Harry was striking up a conversation with someone, two cans of some liquid Y/N couldn’t quite pinpoint in the palm of one of his hands— his big, big hands.

“Don’t listen to her, she’s just cross because Harry only wanted to be friends with benefits with her. That is not how he is with every girl, I hope you know that,” Colette whispered, guiding her by the small of her back toward Harry.

Did Y/N know that? She didn’t think she did.

What if that is what Harry wanted from her? What if he felt nothing for her at all? What if she was merely a conquest for him?

Y/N decided not to say anything about what Emma said to her as Y/N and Colette entered the conversation Harry was currently participating in.

Harry rested one of the drinks on the counter and popped open the other with his fingers, handing it to her, then pressing a soft kiss to her cheek. Was that a good sign?

For the first time since she began studying with Harry, Y/N felt stupid again.

____

Harry was completely oblivious to the internal turmoil Y/N was facing, but how could he have known when she slipped on a mask so well?

After he had finished up in the bathroom, he couldn’t stop thinking about how Y/N was the only thing that occupied his mind. He filled her thoughts, her scent infiltrated his apartment, and her smile when she walked into his class was the thing that kept him going on days when he was more tired than he should have been.

He thought he made it so obvious how much he cared for her. There was no way she didn’t know how special she was to him.

Y/N, he thinks, was perfect for him. And he was perfect for her.

TAG LIST: @skysladylazarus @sunshinemoonsposts @shamelessfangirl-3 @lovelyharry @tenaciousperfectionunknown @winterrays @kiwilikesmeow @cherieshine @harryssky1 @allannahdaisy @cthwildflwr @grapejuicebluesrry @ppleasingg @ronanthesimp @awwshucks13 @libbyhermione @matildasatellite

(If you wanted to be added or taken off please let me know)

1K notes · View notes

aqwnstars · 7 months

Text

Incubus!Scaramouche x GN (Afab) Reader

Pronouns used: You, yours.

CW: Dacryphilia, breeding (consentual), fingering, degrading (use of 'whore' 'slut' etc.) , reader is a virgin

(Dm me if I've missed any!)

Word count: 2.7k

<3 Hi hi!! I finally decided to post something, and what better way to start it off than with a bang (HAHA LITERALLY SIDNDN (im so funny))

DISCLAIMER: EVERYTHING IS CONSENTUAL. SCARAMOUCHE DOES NOT USE ANY SPELLS OR POWERS TO SEDUCE READER. I DO NOT WRITE/SUPPORT NONCON.

nsfw under the cut!!

Fleeting desires

It was an oddly quiet night at the bustling city you lived in as you walked home from the get together your work colleagues put together. You felt a bit tipsy as you walked, but still had your guard up for anything suspicious going on. Your pace quickened as you got an unnerving feeling in your bones, as if someone was watching you.

After a terrifying 10 minutes of walking you finally made it outside of your apartment, you took your keys out, putting it in the lock before you felt a hot breath against your neck. You shudder at the feeling as you quickly turn around, your sight being met with a short man with horns and a tail.

"Oh, your reactions are priceless, human." The incubus, from what you figured sneered at you, licking his lips seductively. You could feel your body getting hotter from the mere seconds you've spent around him.

"W-who are you?!" You stutter, blinking as you feel yourself getting turned on just by looking at him, prompting you to look away. "Keep your eyes on me, lowly creature." He demanded, and you couldn't help but obey his orders. "Hm, you're quick to obey orders, I like that." He commented, his voice becoming raspy and low.

"How about I give you the best experience of your life, and you give me your.. energy, hm?" He says, stepping closer to you, oh how inviting his voice was. "S-sure-- L-let me just--" You mumble, unable to bring yourself to resist him as you unlocked the door and let him in. As the two of you walk to your bedroom he suddenly grabs your hand, pulling you into a kiss, making you yelp in surprise. He took advantage of your open mouth as he slid his tongue in, swirling and exploring your mouth. His kisses seemed desperate and needy, as if he was starving to touch someone. You whimpered as he finally pulled away, a string of saliva connecting you as he does so. "I'll like this more than I thought I would." He said, chuckling before pulling off your top.

The cold night air hit your chest as he threw your top somewhere behind, his deep indigo eyes only focusing on you, as if he's a predator watching his next meal, which in a way is true. He didn't waste an extra second before his lips were all over your neck, reaching down to your collarbone as he licked all over your skin, relishing in the slightly salty taste of your skin.

A groan left his mouth as he bit into your sensitive flesh, sucking and licking at it for a few seconds before pulling away, admiring his work with a smug look on his face. The look in his eyes made your legs pudding as you sat down on your soft bed, your fingers gribbing the bedsheets as an attempt of calming yourself as you looked up at him.

"The desprate look in your eyes, it's so charming, but so pathetic." He mocked you, yet you couldn't help but feel shivers on your skin at his words. You mumbled something quietly, your eyes looking at your thighs in shame.

"Oh, come on, you surely aren't hurt by my words dear?" His voice was calmer and softer than the previous time he spoke, as if he's trying to comfort you, the look in his eyes said otherwise though. You shake your head, biting your lip before speaking more clearly; "P.. please touch me." You say weakly, but his eyes just lit up with lust and need.

He stepped closer to you, and another step, and another until he stood right in front of you. He climbed the bed, placing his knee between your thighs and spreading them as he started to crawl on the bed, his voice was low and seductive as he whispered onto your neck,

"Beg for me to fuck you.." He smirked before biting and sucking at your nape, making a gasp of pleasure leave your lips.

"Plead for me to pound my incubus cum into you, to make you my personal whore, hm?" He pulled away from your neck, looking at you, his eyes looked so beautiful under the moon's light, they shined with the desire and need to feel your body. You felt your skin shiver at his glare, gulping your pride away as you spoke.

"P-please fuck me dumb.." You looked away, feeling your dignity die within your soul, yet he just shook his head "Not enough. I need you to beg."

You sighed, ultimately deciding your pride is worthless compared to the demon on top of you. You tilt your head towards his as you spoke: "I..I need you so bad, p-please.. I want your cum f-filling my insides..!!"

You exclaimed, almost loudly. You closed your eyes, feeling your cheeks become redder by the second.

Scaramouche nods proudly before speaking, his tail touching the inside of your thighs, going up and down.

"Still shy, but I'll make you into my personal bitch in heat, don't you worry." He laughs as he takes your chin, forcing you to look at him as you open your eyes.

"I'll fuck you until your mind goes blank, the only thought on your dumbfucked mind will be my cock, my cum and me." He said smugly, a confident and possessive tone in his voice, rather out of character for an incubus. His lips curled into a smirk as he licked your lips, forcing his way in as he kissed you, his hands roaming across your body, touching every curve on your body as you moaned in the kiss.

He pulled away swiftly, looking at the desprate lust in your eyes as you let out a quiet whine. His hands placed themselves on your hips as he grinded his knee to your clothed clit, making you gasp in surprise that quickly turned into moans of pleasure.

He loved seeing you get so worked up over just grinding on his knee, you didn't even realize it but he stopped moving. You close your eyes as you whined loudly, your hips moving by themselves to grind harder on his knee.

"Look at you, already so pathetic for me and I didn't even do a thing to you."

He laughed audibly, but it felt as if you couldn't hear him as you moaned, right before he removed his knee that is.

"H-hey?! Wh-why'd you do that?"

You ask, pouting at him as he repositioned himself, taking your legs and putting them around his waist, bringing you closer to him. "Shut up slut." He scoffed, before smirking at your reddened face. You obviously weren't used to being degraded, but hearing his voice call you disgusting and degrading things was so arousing to you. You didn't know how Scaramouche knew exactly the things he needed to do and say to get you off, but he exceeded any expectations you've had for him.

His fingers grip at your pants, quickly pulling them off as you snap back into reality. Scaramouche stared at your underwear which has wet spots on it, his tail flicked in delight as he pressed his index finger on your clothed clit, swirling around it, making you squirm and whine.

From all the humans he's fucked throughout the 500 years he has been alive, he never saw one this desprate for him, this obsessed over his touch. His cold heart felt warmer by how many noises you make just by him teasing you with one finger. It almost makes him think you're a virgin, well if you were it'd be better for him.

He removed his finger which resulted in you whining from the loss of pleasure. "No need to whine so much, I know how desprate you are, and I get it." He laughed brfore he grabbed your underwear, swiftly pulling it off and throwing it on the floor.

His indigo eyes looked as if they were glowing in the dark as he spread your legs, revealing your dripping and wet cunt. His lips curled into a smirk at the sight of your body showing it's desperation for his touch.

He hadn't even user any charm powers on you, oh no this was all your desire. "You're so wet for me, I didn't even have to use any spells or charms, you're just a slut huh?"

He laughed, using his finger to stimulate your clit before inserting his middle finger in, your gummy walls stretching around it. Soft and quiet moans left your lips as he started thrusting his finger in, the wet noises that were coming from your pussy were so loud as he added his ring finger in.

"Do you feel my fingers stretching your hole?" He asked, his hot breath against your neck, making you shudder in pleasure. You nod, not trusting your tongue to do anything but moan and babble nonsense.

He smirked at the lack of audible response he got, quickly pulling out his fingers before taking your face, tilting your head to him. "Speak. I didn't understand you, human." His indigo eyes looked at you with full attention, his sharp canines showing with the smirk that was on his lips.

"Y-yes I feel your fingers s-stretching my hole.." You stutter, looking away from him in shame but he just scoffed; "Look at me when you speak." You took in a breath as you look at him, repeating yourself.

"Good bitch." He laughed as he lowered his head down on your neck, his warm tongue swirling on it before he sunk his teeth in as he inserted his fingers in and out of you again. You tilt your head back as you moan, feeling a knot form in your stomach, your legs were shaking as you whined loudly.

"I-i'm gonna cum!!" You whine loudly, tears falling from yohr eyes as you close them. The demon smiled at you, though you couldn't see it. He removed his lips from your neck before licking your tears, starting from your chin ending near your eyes.

You looked so pretty to him, though he'd never tell you that. Your cheeks red, tears shiny and glossy from your tears. How loud you moaned for him? He loved everything about this new human of his. That's right, you're now his human.

"Do you wanna cum, hm? You wanna break all over my fingers, like a whore?"

He spoke smugly, the smirk on his face never disappearing. You nodded your head up and down, your voice stuttering; "Y-yes! I wanna cum so badly, p-please!!"

"I'll allow you to cum if you tell me who owns you, pathetic human~" He purred into your ear as his fingers stopped.

You couldn't resist anything, it was him we're talking about after all.

"I-i'm yours, a-and you own me!! P-please let me cum!!" You whined, your knuckles turning white as you gripped the bedsheets harshly. He finally obliged, thrusting his fingers again. "I own you, hm?" His voice was raspy and loe as he continued; "Cum for me, cum for your master." Your walls clenched around his fingers as you quickly came undone, the know in your stomach snapping as you scream in pleasure.

Your body twitched as you fell onto your back, short pants leaving your lips as you try to catch your breath. Scaramouche pulled his fingers out, bringing them to his lips and licking them clean, a soft moan leaving his lips due to the sweet taste. You were so intoxicating to him, he doesn't think he can simply leave you after this ordeal, not when you're this sweet and adorable for him.

Your eyes look at him before quickly looking away, too embarrassed to see how he was licking his fingers, your eyes dart to his shorts, more speficically the tent in them. Eyes widening, you feel yourself getting turned on again, the thought of you, a lowly human making an incubus so needy for you?

Everything felt like a blur, you don't even remember how quickly Scaramouche took off his shorts, and how quickly he started to thrust into you. You're too drunk on his cock to think about anything clearly. Your voice was sore as you moaned, nails digging into his back as he moved his hips back and forth, his cock hitting the sensitive spot again and again.

"Y-you're so tight, are you a virgin? C-couldn't believe it, from how slutty you were." The incubus moaned, his hips never wavering, sweat drops started to form on his forehead, leaning his head into your neck he bit it, sucking on it as his hips suddenly stopped. He removed his lips from your neck and looked at you, his breath short pants before he asked; "Are you a virgin?" You couldn't form your words, you could barely hear him infact, but you nodded, confirming his suspicion.

He smirked at the revelation, one of his hands placing itself at your hip while the other took your chin, his voice became calm and collected; "Oh, I'm your first time? .. An honor indeed." He licked his lips, before leaning into yours. He had never met a virgin who's this needy and, well, who's this good at feeding him.

You were confused on why he had asked that, does it matter whether or not you lost your virginity, but the way the look on his eyes suddenly shifted tone felt intoxicating to you. How he stared down at you, his bangs sticking to his forehead as he panted, it's as if a switch has been turned on inside of him.

His breath started to become less controled, his face turning red as his smirk widened. You couldn't help but be more aroused at his state, as if he's going feral.

Little did you know, that he wanted to mark you as his human. For you to only need him, to only want him. Scaramouche felt something akin to a string dragging him to you, he felt like a moth to flame when he saw you. It was so out of his character to want a pathetic human like yourself, and he hated how much he needed you.

Yet he couldn't help himself, his tail wrapped itself around your thigh, his hips started to thrust again, this time his pace was faster than it was earlier, all you could hear is skin slapping against skin, Scaramouche's groans and your moans.

He felt his orgasm nearing, and sensed yours too. He looked at you, lust and longing in his eyes as he asked, his voice trembling; "C-can I cum inside? And m-make you mine?" His voice sounded so soft and genuine, a contrast to his harsh and fast thrusting.

Scaramouche wouldn't dare mark you as his without consent, something the other incubus do. He doesn't know why, but if he marked you without permission he knew you'd resent him, and the unfamiliar yet welcome string would break.

You nodded, grabbing his face and pulling him into a kiss. Your lips danced against one another, his cock hitting your g-spot repeatedly. You felt your walls clench around his cock as you came undone once more, whines and moans leaving your lips as he continued to fuck you.

"A-archons you're even tighter now.." He sighed out as his pace quickened, his hands gribbing and bruising your hips.

"You w-wanna be my personal whore so badly don't you?" He panted, a whimper leaving his lips as you nodded, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as he did one final thrust before finishing inside you.

Ropes of white sticky cum filled up your womb, your body twitched in overwhelming pleasure as he calmed down from his orgasm.

He pulled out, looking at how his cum was pooling out of you, and suddenly he got a rush of energy as he saw an unknown symbol appearing around your stomach, a symbol that represented him.

"We can't let my cum just spill out of you can we? No.. I have to fill you up again." He smirked, leaning down to kiss your neck before lining himself against your pussy again. This is going to be a long night.

-- but he has to make sure you know who you belong to, right?

#scaramouche x reader #scaramouche #genshin x reader #genshin smut #genshin imagines #scara x reader smut #scara x reader #genshin scara #smut #genshin impact #kabukimono x y/n #wanderer x reader

455 notes · View notes

ranboolivesaysstuff · 1 year

Note

TELL US MORE ABOUT THE SPRINGLOCK SEQUENCE PLEASE it sounds so interesting /gen

(and as someone with aphantasia i’m fascinated how tf do you do it lmao)

Ok AS A DISCLAIMER I AM NOT AN ACTUAL FILM MAKER YES THIS MAY SOUND LAME AS HELL IVE GOT NO CLUE WHAT IM DOING ALSO I DONT KNOW TOO MUCH ABOUT THE FNAF LORE SO APOLOGIES IF I GET ANYTHING WRONG

Okay now that that safe guard is in place.

Okay so it starts out with like rain preferably facing towards the sky

The camera then pans down to reveal the restaurant, neon sign flickering, trash littered along the messy alleyways

Cuts to alleyway

A rat scurries across a newspaper which reveals a headline about missing children. A scream echos from presumably inside the building just as the viewer gets enough time to read what is on the newspaper

Cuts to interior of the restaurant, classic recognizable items are littered about, another scream but louder, another cut

The scream continues into the cut while a slow zoom from the first animatronic you are now able to see: Freddy with his mouth wide open, almost broken the scream is timed in such a way it appears to be coming from his mouth. In the zoom out you can see multiple animatronics all disassembled (I think that’s what happened before in the cutscenes in the games but idk)

You hear another scream another cut this time to an odd first person shot, you see that your body appears to be a man, he appears to be running from something all you can make out is a small ghostly figure as he looks back.

Another cut to reveal the golden Bonnie suit. You hear footsteps getting louder as a door opens casting light onto it.

Another cut. This time to the rainfall again.

A single drop then falls, you watch it fall as it makes its way into the crack in the roof. It makes it’s way past the pipes and the vents and eventually drips down as time slows. The drop is now being viewed from the top down and you can see the man now wearing the springlock suit is being cornered by multiple ghostly figures however this is all out of focus.

As the drop gets close to the shoulder it cuts again, half of the face of springlock Bonnie Is visible as you can see the man inside smiling smugly, you zoom into the droplet as it hits his shoulder and makes its way in

You see it move past the complicated and tiny gears and into the incorrect one.

Cuts to black all you can hear are the sounds of mechanical failure, bones shattering, and the screaming of a man now trapped.

this is how I’d do it i think there’s another version with the gore bits but the tldr for that as I am tired is that its a bunch of different cuts between his screams and terror and the children’s unforgiving faces and it just has close ups of each metal rod being stabbed into him :D

Once again I have no idea what I’m doing yes this is just a fnaf movie scene it’s 6am and I’m having a great night I kind of thought of this as like a cool opening scene of sorts

2K notes · View notes

personne-reblogs · 1 year

Text

AUTISTIC SWEEP

The shouts of the crowd are fading into white noise.

The curtains are closing.

The lights are dimming.

The air still feels filled with static, though.

This is a fight Donatello had known he couldn’t win, logically. The competition had been all fun and games, but this challenger was another story. No amount of support or hype could make up for such a gap; the bone deep certainty didn’t leave room for hard feelings.

Struggling to catch his breath, battle shell against the wall, Donatello looks up from where he’s been getting some rest - not passed out rest, mind you. More like a beauty nap.

He lets out a genuine chuckle.

Shigeo Kageyama is simply standing there, as he has been for most of the fight.

“Sweet Marie Curie,” he puffs, keeping his voice level. The roar of the crowd hasn’t entirely died down, but he knows he is heard. “You don’t even have a scratch.”

The one they call Mob is giving him a stare. He still seems a little out of it.

“You fought well,” he states calmly, and Donnie giggles.

“Oh, please. I’ve been losing tournaments at home for as long as I can remember. You don’t need to feel sorry for me.”

At that, Mob flashes a grin. “I’m not sorry,” he says bluntly, coming over in lazy steps. “But it hasn’t been easy, either.”

He sits down, legs stretched out in front of him, and Donnie can now see that his breathing is a little heavy. He feels himself get cocky.

“Well, I wasn’t about to just let you win. If I had to go down, might as well give ‘em a show, right?”

Mob sends him a sideway glance. “You really are all about dramatics.”

“What can I say?” Donnie sighs theatrically, proving his point. “This whole competition is about being swag. I could hardly disappoint.”

“I don’t think you could," his opponent utters. “You’re very expressive.”

Donnie raises a perfectly drawn eyebrow. This is something he hasn’t often been told. He looks over to Mob, and the tension in the boy’s shoulders makes him hum in thought.

“I don’t know who’s next, but you are going to crush them,” he provides. When Mob gives him a nonplussed glance, he goes on. “And even if you don’t, it’s still the last one. How good does that sound?”

“... it has been getting a bit much, to be honest.”

“Yeah, this is wild,” Donnie agrees. “Anyway, what are you gonna do with your trophy once you get it?”

Mob’s smile is a little shy, but he seems happy with the distraction. “I don’t know, actually. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten one. What would you do?”

“Well, you see, there was this one time I won the Lair Games…”

--------------------------

In the next room, a very proud sensei and three worried brothers are getting impatient.

The student and the sibling don’t seem to care at the moment.

The crowd is gone.

The curtains are closed.

The lights are off.

For now, making small talk with a former rival is just enough.

--------------------------

EDIT: there is now a sequel!

YOOO IT'S BEEN SUCH A WILD RIDE

Disclaimer: I have never read/watched mp100 and I deeply apologize for making him probably very ooc. Just wanted to celebrate this beast of a match in my own way, which is wishing I could draw and deciding to heave words on a doc instead lol

CONGRATS ON MOB!! The final match between mp100 and undertale is gonna be soooo funny but I think Mob's gonna win this thing like it's nothing tbh (he has my vote at least)

@autismswagsummit thank you for reblogging all that Donnie propaganda, I genuinely think he never would've made it this far without the signal boost!

All my thanks to the Rise fandom for these past few days! You guys have made such powerful content and there's been so much hype I'm shocked. SHOCKED I TELL YOU

#donnie sweep #mob sweep #autismswagsummit #donatello #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #save rottmnt #unpause rottmnt #mob psycho 100 #mob psycho #mp100 #mob #writing #my writing #original content #i dunno how i tag these anymore

1K notes · View notes

i-cant-stfu · 1 year

Text

study session - r.l.

pairings: switch!remus lupin x switch!female!reader

warnings: SMUT. kissing, swearing, fingering, grinding, oral sex (m receiving), and pretty shitty writing tbh - not proof read

summary: how a simple study session with your brother’s best friend turned out.

disclaimer: NOT MY GIF!

It was just an innocent study session in the boys’ dorm, learning about potions with your brother’s best friend while he was away. You didn’t know how you ended up in this position: Remus' hands trailed up your thighs as you leaned over to kiss him, your hands stayed in either side of his head, holding yourself up so that you didn’t fall on top of him. You let out a soft moan as his teeth nipped at your lower lip. You pulled back slowly and smirked down at him as his hands made their way under the shirt you were wearing and onto your ass, giving it a hard squeeze.

"We really shouldn't be doing this." Your breathed, your eyes roaming over his now swollen lips. "You’re my brother’s best friend. And we’re in his bed. He’s going to kill me and everyone is going to call me a slut."

Remus sat up slowly, making it so that you had to do the same. He kept his grip on your waist firm as he moved you so you were sitting in his lap. "And who is going to tell ‘everyone’ you're a slut?" He asked, raising a brow at you. "Certainly won't be me. And fuck James" He assured you, his head moving so he could kiss your neck again, sending shivers down your body. Your hand found his hair, pulling at it slightly as he sucked on the skin at your collar bone, his tongue flicking against your flesh with each movement of his lips.

Your bit your lip, trying to hold back the moan that wanted to escape. "Shit..." you breathed, crooking your neck to the side so he would have more access.

"Remus I...." the moan you were holding back escaped your lips the moment his tongue found the spot just below your ear. He dragged it against the skin lightly, so lightly it felt as though a feather was brushing the spot, making your head spin.

You pushed your hips into his almost instinctively, letting out a small gasp as he moved to kiss your earlobe.

His breath was touching your skin as his tongue stopped its work on your neck. "I won't tell anyone, I promise." Remus whispered. His hand moved then his fingers dragging upwards under the shirt to your breasts.

You silently cursed yourself for not wearing a bra that night as his fingers moved in small circles just around the perk of your nipple. He pulled back, watching your face as he pushed his hips upwards, the hard on that was growing in his boxers pressing against your core, making you groan loudly. Your face twisted as he rolled his hips, knowing full well that he could probably feel how wet you were through the fabric of his boxers.

You looked down at him and let your mouth hang open with a breathy moan as his fingers moved to flick against your nipple, his thumb brushing against it so softly your felt as if you were being tortured. His eyes were connected with your, his every movement making your eyes grow even darker, mimicking his own. Just like always, he hadn't even gotten you out of your clothes and yet you were already putty in the palm of his hand. You leaned in all at once, your lips dying for contact with his, but Remus moved out of the way quickly, avoiding your kiss.

He smirked deviously and moved his hands quickly, grabbing your sides and flipping them so that he was on top of you. Your legs wrapped around him, and he rolled his hips, asking for more pressure from yours, but you refused to give it to him. He put a hand against the headboard and leaned down as you pushed him close by his shirt, his shaggy hair hanging in his face. "I'm afraid that's not going to be enough." You breathed out a chuckle. He looked down for a moment, taking in the sight of his shirt pooled around your waist and lets his eyes linger on the red lace panties you wore, his mouth practically watering as he saw it. He looked back at you with puppy golden eyes, now almost black. "I need you to say it" you whispered.

He narrowed his eyes at you and pressed his lips together. If you were trying to get him to beg for you, it wasn't going to happen. "Say what?" He asked, his breath heavy in his chest.

"Say how badly you want me." You smiled and leaned into him, your voice hoarse in his ear. "Say you want to fuck me."

He groaned at that. He did want it. He wanted it more than he ever wanted anything, but he wouldn’t admit it. He was always the one who was in control, especially in bed, and now was not the time where he was about to give that up.

You pulled back and raised a brow at Remus when he didn't immediately beg for you. You let out a giggle "Resilient?" He bit at his lip and, almost daring you to stop, let his free hand fall to your waist. His fingers lightly traced over the lace of your thong and then lower, pulling it to the side as his eyes stayed on you.

You sucked on your cheeks, trying your best to resist the urge to push your hips into his hand. But when his middle finger slid up and down your entrance, you couldn't help yourself. You pushed against him hard, making Remus’ lips curl into a satisfied smirk. "You're so wet..." he breathed. At that, you decided it was time to stop him. You took his hands off of your panties and looked at him angrily.

"Just say it and I’ll let you pleasure me." You asked. You could tell the thought of being inside of you was sending his mind into a frenzy, especially when he allowed himself to look down at his hand. His mouth fell agape when he did, his fingers slowing their pace as he drank in the sight of you. He let out a breathy moan and licked at his lips. His thumb moved to your clit, and right when it did you couldn't help but let out a small gasp, your head falling onto the pillow behind you and your back arching slightly. It was like he was a drug you couldn’t resist, no matter how hard you tried.

His eyes shot back up to your face, and his thumb quickened its movements, small circles with the lightest of touch teasing your weakest point. You could feel your body begging for more. Your hands moved to grab at the sheets on either side of your body, sinking your fingers into them to find any kind of leverage you could. Suddenly a finger pushed inside you, just barely, teasing your entrance while his thumb did its job teasing your clit.

You let out a ragged breath and looked to Remus, holding his hand. He couldn't take it much longer. He needed you.

"Please..." Remus breathed out, earning a bright smile from you. He groaned again, making your hips buck slightly as he leaned down, pressing a kiss to your neck again. He whimpered next to your ear when you grabbed his cock over his pants. “I need you... I need to fuck you, please.." he breathed.

When you nodded with a smirk, Remus pulled back, his hand falling from your core quickly as he moved to sit on his knees. He moved his hands to your shirt and quickly peeled it off of you, letting out a soft moan as he saw what was underneath. You sat up then too, your hand instantly moving to his hair as you pulled him in for a rough kiss, your tongue instantly dancing with his as he pulled your thong off and tossed it across the room. Your breath hitched as his hand moved back to your clit, his fingers rubbing at it firmly as he kissed you. Your hands continued in his boxers, trying your best to push them off of him as you held his hair with your other hand.

Remus instantly pulled back then, his free hand moving to shove your back down onto the bed as his fingers worked tirelessly on your clit. He let out a loud when you pulled his hair, moan and your hand came up to cover his mouth, silencing him all at once. "Can't have people hearing us now, can we?" You whispered, making Remus mutter a small “Sorry”, before moving so he could kiss your neck, then down to your chest, where his tongue flicked gently against your nipple, making you want to let out a loud groan. He kissed lower then, to your stomach, and then your hips, and then...

You let out a ragged moan as his lips found your pleasure point. His tongue replaced his fingers, finding every nook around your clit to flick its way against. You bit down on your lip, trying your best not to make noise when his fingers pushed inside of you, pumping in and out at a painfully slow pace. He crooked his fingers inside of you, feeling around gently before he found exactly what he was looking for. He pressed against a spot and you gasped, the pressure of his tongue and the fact that his fingers were now massaging your g-spot with every touch too much for you to bear.

You could feel your high coming. You could feel yourself tighten around his fingers, every muscle in your body tensing up as you get around your climax.

Then, all of a sudden, you pulled Remus back, not letting yourself reach the point you so desperately desired, but knowing you you thank yourself later. He looked up at you and scoffed, looking a bit confused you moved to stand over the bed. "But I..." he began, groaning softly in protest.

You smirked gently at him, your hand moving to stroke his length through the fabric of his boxers.

"I want to finish differently, baby. Let me pleasure you first." You said, making Remus’ breath hitch. On one hand you wanted to finish the job for yourself, but on the other, something about being in control, making him finish first, made butterflies go up your stomach. He was willing to do whatever you wanted him to do. Something you had never been able to say for any other man.

You moved to the floor, your knees aching in protest from the sheer hardness of it. You didn't care though. You could see how big Remus was through his boxers, making your mouth drool.

Remus’ hands slid to pull down his boxers, and you groaned at what you saw. You could only imagine how he would feel inside of you. You took his length in your hand and began to stroke it slowly, earning yourself a groan from Remus, whos hand quickly found your hair, grabbing a fistful. You leaned in slowly, taking his tip into your mouth and moaning softly at the taste. You let your tongue slide around his head as you started to go down on him.

He was far too big for you. Your hands moved down his shaft, both of them moving up and down as you took in as much of him as you could without gagging.

Remus let out a loud groan and you smiled against his dick, your head going up and down quickly, while your tongue did most of the work. You pulled back all at once and looked up at who was looking down at you with drunken eyes and open mouth, furrowing his eyebrows. You gathered some spit in your mouth and slowly let it drop onto his length, your hands moving to spread it down his length as your mouth returned to work on him.

Remus’ breath hitched and he grabbed at the headboard of the bed, his other hand moving to push you head down further. You could tell he was having trouble keeping quiet, judging on the way his breath was shaking every time your head moved up and down him.

You looked back up at him, your eyes connecting with his as you move. You could hardly contain you, knowing he was loving this, loving the feeling of your dick pressing into the back of your throat every bob of your head. Every muscle in his face twisted as you took him down as far as you could, your eyes watering as you did so. His hand went back to your hair and held you where you were.

You watched as he threw his head back, your eyes flicked to his legs, that were shaking with pleasure. With all of your strength you pulled away from him, standing up and wrapping your arms around his neck. "You don't get to finish until I tell you to." You said. He looked at you and a flash of submissiveness spread across his face. His puppy eyes contradicted the way his hands grabbed your ass, lifting you up and practically throwing you down on his bed. His body moved on top of you and let his lips find yours, kissing you hungrily.

His hand moved to his bed side table as you kissed, knocking things over as he tried to rifle through his sock drawer. He found what he was looking for and pulled away from you. You watched as he brought the condom wrapper to his lips and tore it open with his teeth. He pulled the condom out a lazily rolled it down over his dick, making sure it was on properly before grabbing your legs and hitching them on top of his shoulders.

“Ready?” He asked, with a smirk.

897 notes · View notes

jjkeremika · 2 months

Text

Goofy (pt2)

description: levi fucks some sense into you

Goofy pt1: (you think levi’s too serious. he thinks you’re too goofy)

pairing: levi ackerman x fem!reader

warning/disclaimer(s)?: NSFW/MDNI; hair pulling; light choking; blow job/throat fucking; obedience; spanking; angry/rough/punishment-kinda sex

“oh, have i got a real fucking good joke,” levi answered darkly, licking his lips as he read your expression, as he barely leaned in.

you lamented when he took a step back, but squeaked once he tugged on your bony hips, pulling you to the edge of the desk.

you were his height like this, your lower half sat on the table, feet hovering above the floor. the anger flaring in his eyes branded into yours.

his thumb dug into your right hip, and you winced slightly at the pressure. “titans ripping us limb from limb,” he stated coldly, his thigh rubbing against yours.

your face visibly dropped and your body recoiled lightly, your mouth formed a slight oval. you narrowed your eyes. “that’s not funny.”

his answer was immediate. “no, it’s not, is it?” he chortled darkly, his fingernails squeezed your thigh, a light ache spiraling outwards. you stopped breathing. “but that’s how all these jokes will end.” he narrowed his eyes, his fingertips sharply digging into your skin like they risked breaking through your pant fabric.

“you goof off in here,” he spoke despondently, pointed at the ground, then to the windows, “you kill us all out there.”

you rolled your eyes, the dull ache from pushing them too far into your skull prominent. “we’re not stupid,” you muttered softly, feeling yourself curling inwards, the security crumbling beneath you, “we wouldn’t joke out there.”

“what do you think we’re teaching you?” the irritation tainted his words like venom in snake bites.

both hands moved to your thighs, grabbing on like life support in a raging river. his glare swept through your soul and settled uncomfortably in your gut, each breath not filling your lungs because his hold squeezed the air out.

a faint twitch of his eyebrow caught your eye. “do you think you’ll survive out there acting like this?” he asked incredulously, a temporary shadow casting over his face. “i’ve seen people die for less.”

your silence was deafening, and the words rattled in your head like there was nothing else in your skull. the heels of his palms slowly slid up your pants, pushing into the muscle, stopping near your hip bones.

levi continued, his expression littered with repressed guilt, his eyes flooded with memories, “i’ve watched colleagues die following every step in the book.” he made chilling eye contact, his eyebrows sternly frowned. “you will get everyone killed.”

the conflicting heat built inside you. “maybe we’ll die of boredom first.” it slipped out, and it was a sentence you regretted the instant you saw the flame spiral uncontrollably in his eyes, saw the deep grey twist into a fiery mess.

his jaw locked, his body tensed, his veins displayed, and the hand that was originally on your hip rocketed to just under your chin, holding your neck with a tight grip.

levi leaned in, kept his face millimeters away, so close you could feel the tiny hairs reaching out for him.

you felt your lungs stop, your heart beat racing faster than ever before, pulsing in every extremity.

your brain was numbing it out, all thoughts and incoming feelings drowned out by the roaring of your arteries, brining your attention to the strong desire in your chest to close the gap, to touch him back.

“what the fuck is wrong with you,” he said it so quietly you almost missed it, your brain taking seconds to listen and process. it wasn’t a question, he wasn’t asking. he didn’t care.

you noticed he stopped breathing too, noticed the veins popping out in his neck and the muscles hugging his collarbones so tightly you wondered if you could taste the iron in his blood, under his skin.

“wel—” your mouth was moving without any forethought.

your sentence was interrupted with his grip on your neck and a tight hold on your upper arm, yanking you off the desk and shoving you to your knees before your feet could even touch the ground.

your knees started throbbing lightly, but you couldn’t spare any attention from the heat radiating in front of you, from the absolute glare and curled lip and intimidating stance.

“shut the fuck up.” his hands moved to his pants, your eyes following the movement, your eyes widening slightly, pupils dilating, mouth parting, as you watched him unbuckle his waist band, seamlessly slide his zipper down.

you moved to stand, but his hand whipped to your shoulder, pushing you back into the position. “where do you get off? running your fucking mouth like that.” his tone deepened to an octave you’ve never heard, one you didn’t know possible.

your eyes flicked back to where his pants had fallen to his knees, where his hard cock eagerly waited your attention, shading the same bright red that settled on your cheeks.

“oh my go—” you whispered, cut off by a strong hand pushing the back of your head closer, until your face was right in front of his throbbing cock, your jaw starting to quiver as you became aware of how very dry your throat felt despite the saliva building on your tongue.

your mind was reeling. you’d never seen a dick in person before, the reality supremely larger than you’d imagined from the occasional awkward glance at a poorly hidden erection from the boys or ymir’s lewd drawings or even in the uncomfortable few sex ed classes the garrison held.

“what the fuck did i just say?” the hand tangled in your hair and you desperately watched with dilated pupils and shifting eyes as he lifted the shaft with his other hand, bringing it to your lips.

you thought of licking the liquid leaking out the tip, drooling down the sides. your eyes shifted around, trying to take in as much as you could.

you looked up at him as he spoke, the heat washing over you tempting you to look away, look literally anywhere else, but his hand tightened around your head and you couldn’t control it anymore. or maybe you just couldn’t bring yourself to want to.

the eye contact was chilling, an immediate tether that couldn’t be torn apart. “i’ll teach you to fucking listen,” he practically spat, his stare alone sending shivers through your spine, settling heartily in your pelvis. “i’ll teach you to fucking obey.”

the tip was at your lips and pushing itself inside, your jaw reacting immediately and molding itself around the thick extremity, pushing against the limits of your lips.

levi gave you no time to adjust to the sensation, no time to even notice the taste of his precum as he immediately started shifting his hips deeper into your mouth and pushing your head farther down, fighting a gag complex you never knew you had.

your knee shifted under you, startled by the sudden rocking of your body syncing with his hips.

“fucking suck it, baby,” the groan rumbled from deep within his chest, an unprecedented spout of neediness erupting with increasing speed of his hips. your lips burning with the heat from the softest, silkiest skin, your throat aching with the pounding, your roots threatening to rip from your scalp.

the noises were obscene, and he repeated himself when you didn’t react, as you fought the gags and boldly glanced up, looked into his eyes.

electricity ran down your spinal cord, screamed for you to follow his order, to hollow your cheeks and listen.

“fucking do it.” you closed your eyes, couldn’t bear the weight of his unbroken glare, pupils absorbing and memorizing a sight he frequently imagined and never thought possible. you obeyed.

you cautiously brought your hands to his thighs and ignored the hot tears on your waterline as your throat burned from the fast friction, his thick, long cock threatening to curve down your esophagus with each thrust.

aside from short, deep moans and exerted grunts, levi was quiet, listening to the echo of his labored breathing, of his cock stretching against the roof of your mouth and gliding inside, reconciling each noise with the sight of you on your knees, taking almost most of him.

suddenly he pulled away, snapped his hips back faster than he soared in omni-gear. you chased after him, moaning lightly at the itching in your pelvis, your brain finally having space in your to process your own racing heart beat and throbbing clit, a wetness spilling out of you with each pleasurable pulse.

“fuck, take your pants off,” he demanded breathlessly. “now,” he added when you didn’t move.

your brain was still processing, the blood still loud in your ears. your body was frozen, still didnt move even when he stepped forward, felt the chill from his looming shadow trigger goosebumps on your neck. “do you need me to fucking do it for you? now.”

your lip curled into a taunting smirk, felt a powerful burning set fire to your chest. the muscles in your calves and thighs burned with pulsing hot blood as you stood up, maintained his gaze.

“why did you stop?” you were surprised by the sound of your voice, deeper and raspier. you ignored the sore tissue in your throat, the burning at the edges of your lips as the smirk grew wider, as you took a subtle deep breath. “getting bored?”

your pants made a noise as they hit the floor, but neither of you heard it over the squeak of levi’s shoes as he rushed the grab your hips, digging his thumbs and settling into the dips once he’d turned you around and pushed you into the desk.

you felt the bruise form as his palm collided with your back and shoved down, bending your spine as your torso collapsed onto the table and curving your bum over the edge. “that’s a yes,” you mused, softly giggling.

your giggle was cut short by a shove forward and a sharp sting to your bare left cheek. you squealed as another smack landed on the squishy flesh, felt the fat jiggle in response. you curled your spine, pushed back into the feeling.

“count,” levi ordered, his stinging hand slapping against your pink and plushy cheeks, a lighter imprint on the skin from the immediate contact.

you tried to scoff, but the force forward was pushing the air from your lungs. your stomach dropping to your pelvis when you realized you weren’t keeping track. “and if i don’t?” you ventured, your voice breathless and shaky from each smack. you thought of lifting onto your arms, but you were relaxed into the awkward position. “you’re going to spank me anyway.”

the next smack was harder, bending into your back and digging the table into your wet upper thighs. he grunted, goosebumps pushing to the skin near your ears as he spanked you again on each cheek, a sharp delayed sting racing up your spine like an exclamation mark.

he smacks you again. “oh, there’s one,” you breathed out, a sad excuse of a chortle as your lungs struggled to function, as your pelvis hoarded the blood supply. the skin throbbed as the heat of his hand disappeared, as you felt yourself dragging after him like you were on a string. “oh! two!”

“shut the fuck up,” he grunted out, a light breathy laugh escaping, a smile on his face that he couldn’t repress—didn’t even want to.

you smiled widely at his tone, could feel the warmth coming through. “you told me to count!”

both of you went still as the air echoed with distant laughter. the hairs on your neck stood up as you and levi listened closely, wondered if it was the same boisterous, struggling-to-stay-quiet laughter you two were so, intimately familiar with.

you lamented that you rapidly sat up, catching ymir and sasha’s faces peaking from the door window. you two rushed to get dressed, felt a different heat of embarrassment underlying a stronger need to smile, biting deep into your bottom lip as you wondered how much they saw, as you recalled the entire event and rubbed your throat and bum.

he gave you a look, an apologetic flash in his eyes for rushing out, but the deep red on his chest and face screamed he needed to leave. you followed levi out, and he rushed off. his heels echoed as he walked down the hallway.

you immediately noticed sasha and ymir running up to you, and you covered a wide, repressed smile with your palm, enjoyed the giddy heat in your abdomen. “i’m guessing i don’t have to tell you much.”

you turned to see sasha jumping up and down, giggling and squealing with excitement and grabbing at your arm. you resisted the urge to jump with her, but you excitedly held her hands in return.

“in the fucking boots!” ymir cackled, wrapping her arm around the other side of you and sasha, “that’s some queen and king shit.”

“uh, you have to tell us everything!” sasha said, glancing to historia who had pink cheeks. “we didn’t even see his cock,” she added in faux sadness, pushed out her bottom lip and pouted.

“that’s because it was in her mouth the whole time,” ymir laughed, playfully rolling her eyes, bumping her arm into yours.

“did he tell you off?” historia asked cautiously, still anxious about whether or not they were going to be separated. “did he say anything?”

“oo, dirty talk,” sasha sang, shimmied her shoulders lightly and wiggled her finger, pointed at ymir, “now thats sexy.”

“n-no, i meant—”

“he told me to shut the fuck up,” you confessed, feeling the blush at the memory, knowing it was visible, still wondering how much they knew. sasha and ymir laughed.

you finally noticed admin near the wall, bright pink cheeks and shifty eyes. he was rubbing at his elbow.

“armin, what are you thinking?” you asked, noticing the light distress he was in as he rubbed at the back of his neck, kept switching his weight between his feet.

he shook his head, and ymir rolled her eyes. “armin, you swore your clitoris. you can tell us,” she said as sympathetically as she could, but it still came off a sharp tongue.

“it’s just,” he made brief eye contact with historia, ymir, and sasha before settling on you, “is he going to do that to us?”

#levi ackerman #levi ackerman smut #levi smut #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x y/n #levi x fem!reader #levi x reader smut #levi x reader #levi x you #levi x y/n #levi ackerman x you #attack on titan levi #attack on titan #jjkeremika #attack on titan smut #i’ll make a pt 3

186 notes · View notes

its-straykeedz · 9 months

Text

silver lining; myg

pairing: min yoongi x afab!reader

established relationship!au; marriage!au; pregnancy!au

rating: fluff, smut, angst;

wc: 7,4 k

MINORS DNI!

TW: language; mentions of infertility; conceiving difficulty; mature contents; explicit sexual scene [but like sweet lovemaking]: piv, unprotected sex & cream🥧 (for a purpose), car seggs; heavy themes such as: mentions of an unplanned pregnancy, mentions of a miscarriage, mentions of abortion; Yoongi being so soft it breaks my poor little heart; mentions of a pregnancy scare; mentions of a teenage pregnancy; (please let me know if I forgot something)

Disclaimer: all of my works are entirely fictional and do not represent the characters involved in any way, I just write my fics for fun.

There are a few Korean words in this fic, such as: jagiya, which is a gender-neutral pet name; appa, which means “dad”; eomma, which means “mom”; jal ja, which means “good night”.

Please keep in mind that English is not my first language, therefore feel free to correct me if you spot any mistakes or typos!

☔︎

“He’s so pretty…”, you murmur, holding little Jisung, Taehyung’s son, in your arms, gently rocking him, watching as his little eyes peacefully close as he falls asleep. “I want one…”, you whisper, gently caressing the baby’s soft hair.

“I know you do, jagiya.”, Yoongi wraps his arm around your shoulder, gently pulling you close, careful not to wake the baby up. He places a soft kiss on your temple, as his hand caresses the skin of your bare shoulder. “I want one, too.”

You and Yoongi’ve been trying to get pregnant for years now. You’d started trying before he even proposed to you, and now you’ve been married for over two years and still nothing. It crushes Yoongi’s heart knowing that he still hasn’t been able to give you the thing you want the most: a family.

“I think I’d be a great mom.”, he hears you sniffle, but you’re not looking at him. Instead, you’re looking at the baby in your arms, carefully wrapped in a sage green blanket, with a little pacifier with a bunny on it in his little mouth.

“You will be the best mom in the world, jagiya.”, he places another kiss on your head, and he lingers a bit. “We just have to wait a little longer.”, he wants to reassure you that everything’s gonna be okay, that you’ll have the family you dream of, that you’ll finally welcome a child to the world, but he can’t. He can’t make a promise he’s not sure he can keep.

“I love you so much, Yoongi.”, you whisper, leaning in to kiss him on the lips, but you’re interrupted by Jisung’s stirring, right before he bursts into a loud cry, and Taehyung immediately rushes towards to you, ready to pick his baby up and soothe him.

☔︎

The sensation of Yoongi’s delicate, long fingers brushing against your soft skin is familiar to you, but it makes you shiver nonetheless. He caresses your breasts as he places a series of wet, sloppy kisses all over your neck and collar bone, squeezing one of your nipples between his index and thumb, earning a muffled moan from you in response.

His hand sluggishly moves all over your waist and pelvis, until you feel him place his thumb on your clit, as he keeps thrusting in and out of you at an excruciatingly slow pace, repeatedly brushing over your g-spot with the tip of his dick. He starts moving it in a circular motion, and you let out a timid moan, which only encourages him to repeat the action again and again, until you’re a whimpering mess under him.

“‘m about to cum, jagi…”, he groans in your ear.

“Me too…”, you pant, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with Yoongi kissing your neck and working your clit at the same time. “Please don’t stop.”, you whimper, encouraging him to go faster.

“I love you so much, jagi…”, he lets out a groan as soon as he feels you clench around him, and he finally cums inside you, before collapsing on your naked body, sweaty and exhausted. You run your hand though his soft, black hair, then place a tender kiss on his head resting on your bare chest. “I love you too, so much. So, so much, Yoongi…”

He notices that something’s off, by the way you shift uncomfortably under him and by the way your hand, the one that was caressing his hair, stops moving. He doesn’t ask you what’s wrong, though, and simply lifts up and retrieves his body from between your thighs, before heading to the bathroom to grab you a towel to clean yourself from his cum, that’s slowly dripping out of you.

Once he lays down next to you, in the darkness of your bedroom, and hugs your body close to his from behind, you can’t help but let a few tears slip from your eyes. You hope he doesn’t hear your muffled sniffles, but he does. He does, and tears well up in his eyes too, because he knows the exact reason why you’re crying and it kills him that he can’t take your pain away.

He places soft, delicate kisses on your bare shoulder, but suddenly stops when you call his name. “Yoongi…”, your voice trembles as you fight back the tears. “Why don’t we just…”, you take a deep breath, not sure you even want to say it out loud. “Why don’t we just stop trying?”

Yoongi feels as if his heart just stopped beating once he hears those words come out of your mouth. What is he supposed to say? He knows he can’t make the situation any better, but it hurts him too, he just wishes you knew that. It hurts his heart the way he sees you crying on the bathroom floor with a pregnancy test in your hands, negative every damn time; he was heartbroken too when Taehyung’d given him and his friends the news that he was soon going to become a father.

“Jagi…”, he intertwines his fingers with yours, his voice trembles as his lower lip quivers, signaling he’s about to cry, too. “Are you sure? Do you… do you want to give up?”

You bite your lower lip so hard you can almost taste blood in your mouth. The thought of giving up on having a family with the love of your life makes you feel weak, but at the same time, it’s just too much for you to handle right now. You and Yoongi have been together for many years, you’d started dating when you were in high school, and the moment you met him, you instantly knew he was the one.

You’ve always wanted to become a mother someday. As for Yoongi, he never knew how much he wanted to become a husband and a father until the day he met you. You were both really, really young to even think about having kids or getting married, but it was nice to know that you were on the same page, at least.

When you decided to finally start trying for a baby, you were twenty-three and he was twenty-four. Luckily, both you and Yoongi had already graduated and had stable and well payed jobs, plus you were already living together, so a baby would fit just perfect.

But now, after nearly three years of trying… you’ve almost lost hope.

“I just don’t want to go through all this anymore… the hope I feel every time my period’s late and how it gets crushed the moment I take a pregnancy test and only one damn line shows up…”, you sigh, swallowing the lump in your throat, as you feel Yoongi’s body stiffen behind yours. “I don’t want to feel that kind of pain anymore, Yoongi, it breaks my heart.”

You feel something wet on your shoulder, and that’s how you realize that Yoongi’s crying as well. “Jagi…”, he murmurs, holding you even tighter than he already was. “I’m so sorry, jagiya, so, so sorry…”, he manages to say between sobs, “I want to give you the family we’ve been dreaming of, I want to give you the world…”

You try to turn your body so that you’re now facing him, but struggle a bit, since Yoongi’s holding you a bit too tight, but you somehow manage to do so. When you meet his eyes, you notice his cheeks are flooded with tears, his nose is a bit runny. You cup his face in your hands, brushing away a couple of dark locks from his eyes, then you place a soft, chaste kiss on his plump lips.

“I love you so much, Yoongi…”, you kiss him again, wiping away some tears from his face. “You make me the happiest, it’s just… it gets too much sometimes, I feel like maybe we should take a break from trying, maybe we’re just stressing too much about it.”

He just nods with his head, and this time it’s him who kisses you softly. “Anything for you, jagiya.”

☔︎

Yoongi feels his legs shake and his head starts to spin as soon as he processes his friend’s words. “What?”, he blinks a few times, speechless, secretly hoping that maybe, just maybe, he misheard what Taehyung had said.

“Yup, Jihyeon’s pregnant. A couple of months already.”, his friends repeats himself, with a big smile on his face. “Jisung’s gonna be a big brother.”

Again?, Yoongi thinks, immediately feeling bad afterwards, but he really can’t help it. Little Jisung’s only, like, nine months old and Taehyung’s girlfriend’s already pregnant again?

He gulps hard, as he feels his palms become sweaty, and his thoughts go immediately to you. Yoongi knows that, if Taehyung’d decided to tell him and the boys the happy news, then his girlfriend Jihyeon probably told you and the other girlfriends already. Shit, he thinks, you’re probably going to be devastated.

You’d decided to take a break from trying, yes, but Yoongi knows you like the back of his hands by now, and he knows that you’re probably breaking down inside. He wonders whether he should text you just to check up on you and see how you were doing, but he then decides not to, just in case Jihyeon didn’t tell you anything about the pregnancy.

But she did. She announced her second pregnancy with the brightest smile you’d ever seen on her face, practically shoving her ultrasounds to you and the other girls’ faces. The other girlfriends are all happily cheering and smiling and laughing and you can’t take it anymore. You feel like you’re the worst friend ever, but you really have to force yourself to smile, because it’s just too underwhelming.

“I didn’t know you and Taehyung were trying again.”, Chaerin, Namjoon’s girlfriend, says to Jihyeon, wiggling her eyebrows and playfully elbowing her on the arm.

“We weren’t.”, Jihyeon confesses, blushing a little, and your stomach drops, as your legs begin to shake. “We hadn’t been exactly… careful, so when my period was late we knew there might be a chance, you know?”

You can’t believe it, and you can’t help but feeling a bit angry. You and Yoongi’ve been literally trying for years, and the moment Jihyeon and Taehyung have unprotected sex once she gets pregnant with her second child? This must be one of God’s sick jokes, because seriously, what the fuck?

When Yoongi comes home later that night, he finds you laying on your bed, still with your clothes on, and he can hear your sobs even from the doorstep, and his heart crashes into a million pieces, because he knows. He knows the reason why you’re so sad, and the worst thing is he can’t do anything to make the situation any better. He can’t take your pain away, as much as he wants to.

“Jagiya…”, he murmurs, sitting on the bed next to you. He places his soft hand on your cheek, caressing it with his long fingers, as he feels your hot tears on his skin.

“I… Jihyeon’s…”, you can’t even get the words out of your mouth.

“I know.”, Yoongi interrupts you, and you’re thankful for that, because even saying it out loud makes your heart ache even more. “I know, jagi, I know… I’m so sorry.”, he whispers, placing a warm kiss on your forehead.

“It was unplanned.”, you manage to say, taking a deep breath. “Why us, Yoongi? Why?”, your voice trembles. “We’ve been trying for years after… after…”, you can’t say it out loud, it hurts too much.

And Yoongi knows, because as you speak those words he gulps and closes his eyes, letting the pain sink in at the thought of your miscarriage. His mind goes back to when the doctor told you that your baby didn’t make it, and it hurts him just like that day.

You and Yoongi had decided not to tell anyone about your pregnancy. You’d just found out, plus it was too early to be announcing it to all of your friends and family, and you wanted to keep it just for yourselves for a little while. Until that morning, when you woke up to an unusual pain in your lower abdomen and an unexpected red stain on both your pajamas and bedsheets. And you just knew.

Yoongi didn’t cry then, nor in your gynecologist’s studio when she confirmed your suspicions, because he knew he had to be strong for you, even though it was killing him. He cried in the shower though, when he was alone, where his tears got mixed up with the hot water drops falling on his face, hoping that it’ll somehow erase all the pain he was feeling. It didn’t. He didn’t feel any better, he doesn’t feel any better, he just learned how to live with the weight, instead of being crushed by it.

“I don’t know, jagiya…”, he lets out an hopeless sigh, fighting back his own tears.

“It’s so unfair.”, you snap, not angry at Yoongi, but at your fate. “I want to be a mom, I want it so bad. And then she mentioned she thought about having an abortion, because the thought of having another kid so soon scared her, and I was dying inside.”, you sit up on the mattress, wiping away the dried tears on your face with the hem of your green sweater.

“Yeah, Taehyung told me about it.”, he sighs, letting himself fall on the mattress on his bed, covering his tired face with both of his long, tapered hands. “But it’s not their fault. I mean, they don’t know about our… issue. It doesn’t make me feel better, though.”

“Jihyeon probably hates me.”, you mumble, and Yoongi removes his hands from his face to look at you with a confused look on his face. “I didn’t even want to see the ultrasounds. I just sat there, smiling awkwardly.”

“Taehyung probably hates me, too, then.”, Yoongi comments, as he gets up and starts undressing only to change into his pajamas. “Didn’t wanna see them either. I was the only one.”, he says, unzipping his jeans, as you stare at his half-naked body, because he looks just so gorgeous. “I know it shouldn’t bother me because, as I said before, it’s not their fault, but it’s just so hard to pretend you’re happy when you’re actually not.”, you nod, watching him slip into his pajama pants, the ones you’d bought him last Christmas. “I mean, of course I’m happy for him-“

“I get it.”, you interrupt him. “I feel that way too. I thought that I was just being selfish, though, and I feel so guilty.”, you stand up too, removing your sweater to change into one of Yoongi’s t-shirts, one of your favorite to sleep in.

You lay next to each other, body entangled in the soft cotton sheets, but with your eyes wide open, staring at the white ceiling. Yoongi’s fingers are intertwined with yours, but neither of you dares too speak, too absorbed in your thoughts. You just lay there, wide awake, in complete silence.

“Yoongi?”, you break the silence, but you don’t turn to look at him, too scared that the eye-contact might stop you from asking him what’s on your mind. “Would you still love me? If I couldn’t have kids, I mean… Would you still wanna be with me?”, your voice quivers as you speak the last few words.

“Jagiya.”, Yoongi sounds almost as if he’s scolding you. Little does he know that it’s your worst nightmare. You’re so scared that he’ll leave you if he finds out that you can’t give him the family he wants, that you won’t be carrying his children, that he’ll just leave you for another woman, one who can and will give him what you can’t. “I’ll love you no matter what. Forever. That’s what we promised to each other at the altar, and I do not intend to break that promise.”, his tone is serious, as if he’s almost offended by your question. “You’re the love of my life, jagiya.”

He hears you sniffle, and then he feels your body shift, until you hid your face in the crook of his neck, as he envelopes your body with his muscular arms, caressing your back to soothe you. “What if it’s me?”, he murmurs, his voice is so quiet you almost don’t catch what he says.

“What if it’s you what?”

He gulps hard, his eyes become watery. “What if I can’t give you kids? What if I am the problem?”, you feel something wet fall on your hair, and that’s how you realize that he’s crying. “What if…”, he chokes, “What if you wake up one day and realize that you’re just wasting your time with me? That you could have everything you ever wanted with another man?”

You lift your body to meet Yoongi’s eyes, before placing your cold hand on his cheek, making him shiver at the sudden feeling. “Yoongi…”, you brush the tip of your nose against his, “You’re all I ever wanted.”

☔︎

“Oh my God, we’re… the worst babysitters ever.”, you say between moans, as you sink down on Yoongi’s lap once more, allowing him to go even deeper.

You don’t know exactly how you and Yoongi ended up having sex in the backseats of his car, parked right in the path that runs along Taehyung and Jihyeon’s backyard. Thankfully, it’s dark outside and there’s no one around, otherwise you’d be screwed. Taehyung and Jihyeon had asked you and Yoongi to babysit little Jisung for the night so that they could enjoy some time for themselves.

You were right about to open the car door and ring the bell, when Yoongi pulled you in for what was, in the beginning, a peck on the lips. It then turned into a heavy make out session, and now you’re on his lap, legs spread wide, his veiny hands squeezing your thighs in such an erotic way it makes you shiver.

“Relax, jagi, we still got time. About ten minutes.”, he pants, eyes closed, as he bites his lower lip, focusing on how wet and soft you feel around him. “But I don’t know if I can last that long.”, he chuckles.

You let out a high pitched moan when he moves one of his hands from your thighs and places it on your exposed breasts, cupping one of your boobs, slightly pinching your nipple with his thumb and index, and you see him playfully smirk at you. “You’re so hot like this, jagiya.”, he grunts, snapping his hips up so that the tip of his dick roughly brushes against your g-spot, making you yelp once again. “I almost forgot how you feel around me.” he moans as he watches you bounce on top of him.

You and Yoongi didn’t have sex at all the past month and a half. Sure, you did other things, such as foreplay or occasional dry humping, but ever since you’d suggested a break from… trying, you haven’t gone all the way until tonight, when you both gave in to lust like a couple of horny teenagers.

“I’m gonna cum, jagi, are you close?”, Yoongi pants, his black hair is stuck on his sweaty face and it’s the hottest sight you’ve ever witnessed.

You nod, “Yes, so close.” Yoongi moves his other hand so that his thumb would brush against your clit, but you stop him before he can touch your sensitive spot. “No, I-“, you gasp for air, “I think I can cum just like this.”

Yoongi growls at the sound of your words, as he grips your hips, squeezing the flesh tight. “Fuck, you’re so hot. I’ve missed this so much, jagi, please cum on my dick, I’m so close.” As soon as he feels you clench and tighten around him, he squeezes his eyes shut, cussing under his breath. “Fuck, jagi, I’m close.”, he pants, “Lift yourself up, I’m about to cum.”, he bites his lip, gesturing for you to lift your body from his lap in case you didn’t want him to finish inside you. Instead, you pushed your body down, sinking onto him even more, so that his length fills you up completely. “Fuck, I’m-“, he’s cut off mid sentence by his breathtaking orgasm.

You stay there, in the backseats, you on top of Yoongi, both of you desperately trying to catch your breaths. Your arms are around his body, and you rest your head on his chest, as he runs a hand though your long hair. You feel his cum slowly drip out of you as he softens inside you, good thing you always carry wet wipes in your bag wherever you go, otherwise you’d be screwed.

“Get up, jagiya, we have to go now.”, Yoongi whispers in your ear. You hum in protest, but get up anyway, because you have a baby to babysit, otherwise you’d stay here with him, cuddled up to his chest, as he holds you tight.

“I’m sorry…”, he mumbles, as he zips his jeans and fixes his hair, and you look at him confused. “Because I…, you know, came inside.”, he gestures, visibly embarrassed, his cheeks blushing a little. He’s so cute.

“Why are you sorry?”

“Well, since you said you wanted to take a break from trying…”, he trails, but you get the point. “I wasn’t expecting… that,” he goes on “otherwise I’d have brought condoms or just, you know, finished somewhere else.”, he sounds guilty, and you hate that.

“Yoongi, love, it’s okay. I wanted it, I liked it.”, you reassure him “The whole taking-a-break thing was just because it was just too much to handle back then. I just needed some time. It’s okay, I promise.”, you kiss him on the lips, hoping that it’ll wash away all the guilt he’s feeling, and somehow it does.

“I love you.”, he places a soft peck on your lips.

“I love you too.”, you giggle, brushing your nose against his, “Now let’s go, Min Yoongi, we got a baby to babysit.”

Kim Jisung is an utterly adorable baby. He’s got the prettiest little eyes, and the softest gummy cheeks you ever squished, plus he’s always super calm and quiet, you barely heard him cry since he was born, except for when he was hungry. Taehyung’s always manifested his love for kids, and it really was no surprise to you all when he and his girlfriend announced the pregnancy after just a couple of years of dating, since he always rambled on and on and on about wanting to be a father while he was still in his twenties -technically, he wasn’t even twenty-five when his girlfriend gave birth to Jisung, but whatever.

Jisung sleeps quietly, as you and Yoongi watch him squeeze his favorite plushie in his tiny, adorable hands, and you can’t help but let out a sigh, that has Yoongi to quickly pull you into a hug from behind. “He’s just too cute.”, you smile at the precious baby boy, and you hear Yoongi hum in agreement. “He grew up so fast, though. It feels like yesterday when Taehyung called us, saying that Jihyeon was in labor.”

“Babies do grow up fast.”, he agrees with you. It’s kinda sad, though, isn’t it?”, Yoongi squeezes you tighter, eyes locked on sleeping Jisung. “They’re so cute, wish they could stay like this forever.”, he speaks as if he’s daydreaming -and he is.

“Bet you won’t be saying that when you’ll have to change, like, a million diapers per day.”, you and Yoongi jump at the sound of Taehyung’s voice. You’ve been too caught up in the moment to notice the rattling of the keys and the door opening. “But he is cute, I’ll give you that.”, he chuckles, placing the keys on the table, before helping Jihyeon, his fiancée, take off her coat. Her baby bump is showing already, and you wince at the sight, biting you cheek.

Taehyung immediately goes to the crib where his baby is peacefully asleep, and caresses Jisung’s puffy cheeks with his fingers. Little Jisung stirs at the feeling of his father. “Hi buddy, I’m back.”, he whispers to his son, completely and utterly in love.

“Tae, don’t wake him up.”, Jihyeon scolds him, getting closer to the crib as well, but watching her son from afar, not wanting to disturb his sleep any more.

“But I missed him.”, Taehyung pouts, unable to keep his hands off his son. “It’s so hard to stay away from him.”

“Did Jisung give you a hard time?”, Jihyeon smiles at you and Yoongi as she sits on the couch, caressing her belly.

You and Yoongi both shake your heads no. “No, he’s an angel. He’s so cute.”, your heart aches a bit at the thought of having to leave him soon.

“I wonder if baby number two is going to be so calm and peaceful, too.”, Jihyeon giggles, her hand still on her baby bump.

You wonder how it feels, to have a life growing inside of you. You haven’t got to experience that yet, and when your miscarriage happened you were only four weeks pregnant, and there had been no significant changes in your body.

“Sorry if we ruined your plans for the evening by asking you to babysit Jisung.”, Taehyung says, picking up his sleeping baby from the crib, before holding him closer to his body as little Jisung nuzzles into his chest, still not letting go of his plushie. “We didn’t know who else to ask.”, he kisses his son on the head. “Seokjin and Namjoon are out of town celebrating their hundredth anniversary or whatever, and Jungkook… well, I don’t trust him with my baby yet. He’s still a baby, for God’s sake.”, Taehyung jokes, making both you and Yoongi laugh.

“It was our pleasure.”, you reassure him. “We love Jisung, we had so much fun.”, there’s sadness in both your voice and your smile, Yoongi can feel it.

“Are you sure? Thought you might wanted to be alone.”, Jihyeon insists, but you shake your head once more.

“It’s fine, really. We really do enjoy spending time around Jisung. Plus Yoongi and I are alone 99% of the time anyway…”

Jihyeon and Taehyung quickly look at each other before looking away. Jihyeon clears her throat, “We just thought you were uncomfortable around babies?”, her voice comes out more like a question.

You and Yoongi both gulp hard, visibly taken aback. You are definitely not ready for this conversation. You and Jihyeon are close, yes, but you have always been the type of person to keep her personal stuff… well, private. You don’t like to share too much about your life, especially when it’s about sensitive topics like this.

Literally no one knows that you and Yoongi’ve been trying to have a baby. He’s close to Taehyung, he’s one of his best friends, but it’s not like they talk about these kind of things.

“We’re not.”, Yoongi simply says, hoping that it’d change the topic. His words are followed by and awkward, unbearable silence, until he clears his throat before he speaks again, “It’s getting pretty late, we’ve got plans for lunch so we have to be up early, we better get off.”

☔︎

You feel like you could faint right there on the spot when Jungkook’s new girlfriend, who just turned nineteen, confesses to you that she’s late. Late late. Like, her period’s late. A couple of weeks, actually. She stares at you with her big, doe eyes, and she looks like she’s about to burst into tears. Thankfully, Jungkook’s in the other room with Yoongi and the rest of your friends, and you and her, Nara, are completely alone.

“Have you…”, you clear your throat, clearly uncomfortable in this situation. Why did she decide to come to you? Sure, you and her are pretty close, and you almost look after as if you’re her big sister, but damn, that was quite straightforward. “Have you and Jungkook had unprotected sex?”, you ask, but deep down you already know the answer, otherwise she wouldn’t be in panic.

She bites her lower lip, guilty, as she nods. “Yeah, but only a couple of times. We didn’t have any condoms and were too caught up in the moment to think straight. He didn’t finish inside, though.”, she tries to find a silver lining, but you know that it could’ve been enough. She could be pregnant.

“You have to take a test.”, you tell her. “It could mean nothing though, my period’s late all the time, I should have had it three weeks ago” you shrug “But, you could also be pregnant. You have to take a test.”, you repeat.

The thought of Nara being pregnant too makes you feel sick. It’s as if everybody else is living your dream and you are just… watching.

“But please,” you sigh “don’t have unprotected sex again if you’re not ready for the consequences.” She nods in silence, knowing that you are right. You’re not really scolding her, you’re just looking out for her. Nara is young, too young to understand all the challenges that a teen pregnancy brings, and you wouldn’t want that for her. Especially because Jungkook and her’ve just started dating.

“Unnie?”, she asks after a couple of minutes of complete silence. “You said your period is late, too.”, she starts explaining herself. “I actually bought two pregnancy test, just in case. Why don’t we take them together? You said you’re late, too. It’d help me release some tension.”, she pulls out two pregnancy tests from her bag.

☔︎

You can’t believe you’re actually peeing on a stick right now. You don’t even remember the last time you took a test, and surely you weren’t expecting to take one now, on a random Saturday night, while your boyfriend was just downstairs, laughing and drinking with his friends.

Nara’s already taken her test, and placed it inside the box without looking at it -which is, in fact, the whole point of a pregnancy roulette-, so you do the exact same. You open the bathroom door to get Nara in, before closing and locking it to make sure no one disturbs you.

“Should we take a look?”, she asks, panic in her voice.

You nod, before taking both boxes in your hands, ready to pull out the tests and see the results. You just know you’re not pregnant, that’s why you’re not anxious or anything. Your period is always late, and this time it’s no exception.

“I’m scared.” Nara’s voice trembles, and she sounds like she’s about to cry.

You instantly pull her into a hug, and she finally lets a couple tears slip from her hazel eyes. “It’s okay, Nara.”, you pat her back. “It’s okay to be scared. I’m here. Breathe in, then breathe out”, you instruct her, hoping it’ll help her calm down a bit. “Whatever the tests shows, you’re not alone.”

She lets out a desperate whine. “What if I’m pregnant, though? My parents don’t even know I’m dating Jungkook, how am I going to explain a baby to them? What do I tell them?”

“Nara, calm down. You don’t even know if you are pregnant. And if you are, then I’m sure you and Jungkook’ll figure it out together.”, you pull away to wipe away some tears from her face. “He likes you very much. He’s not a dick, I know he wouldn’t leave you alone if you were pregnant with his child.”

She nods, convinced by your words. “Okay.”, she swallows her own saliva. “You’re right, unnie, thank you.”

“Ready to look?”, you ask.

She nods, before taking a deep breath. And you do too, even though you know you’re not pregnant. You can’t be. “Yeah, unnie. Let’s get this over with.”

You pull out the test from the box in one swift motion, before placing them on the sink, but they somehow slip and, when you recollect them, there’s absolutely no way you can tell which one’s yours. That’s when you accidentally look at the results.

Negative.

You take a look at the other test.

It’s positive.

Fuck.

☔︎

Yoongi literally throws himself on the bed, and you glare at him because you just hate it when he sits on the bed without changing his clothes first, especially since you changed the sheets this morning. He decides to ignore the look you’re giving him, playfully pushing you, making you fall back on the mattress. “Don’t give me that look, jagiya, I had the shittiest day today, I deserve a good sleep.”, he smirks, but you frown.

“What happened?”, you get closer to his warm body, nuzzling your face into his collarbone.

“I don’t know,” he sighs “my boss stressed me a bit too much, I guess.”, he places a kiss on top of your head. But you know Yoongi like the back of your hands, and you know that something else is definitely bothering him, he’s just not the type to stress too much about work. You lift your head to look at him. “What?”, he asks, not looking into your eyes, which is something he always does when he’s trying to hide something from you.

“Tell me what you are really upset about.”, you insist.

“I already told you.”, he frowns.

“Yoongi, sometimes you seem to forget we’ve been together for almost eight years. I know you.”, you tease him by playfully tickling his side, and he squirms under your touch.

“It’s fine, jagi, it’s nothing.”

“Tell me.”

He takes a deep breath. “It’s just that Jungkook told me something, and I just can’t seem to get it out of my head.” You gulp hard at the sound of his words. You know what he’s talking about, but Yoongi doesn’t know that you know.

“What is it?”, you hope he doesn’t sense the quiver in your voice, and he doesn’t. He’s too much inside his own head at the moment.

“I don’t want to talk about it, it’s stupid.”, he mumbles under his breath.

You sigh heavily. “Stop being so grumpy,” you playfully flick his head “tell me.”

“Fine.”, he gives up. He runs his hand through his hair, unsure whether he should even be telling you that. He doesn’t want to bring up the sensitive topic of pregnancy once again, but you’d find out soon anyways. “Jungkook told me Nara’s period is late.”, he blurts out, unable to look at you. “She hasn’t gone to the doctor yet, but Jungkook’s pretty positive she’s pregnant since they had unprotected sex this month.”

“Oh.”

“I didn’t want to tell you, jagi, but I figured that she’s going to tell the girls and you’d find out anyways.”, he sounds guilty, and he immediately wraps his strong arms around you to comfort you.

“Why are you upset, then?”, you ask, your voice is muffled by your face being pressed against his sweater.

He lets out a long, heavy sigh, as he lets go of your body. “I don’t know, it’s just…”, his head falls back on the soft pillow under his head “The thought of Jungkook becoming a father… I don’t know, it makes me wish I was in his place.”

“You wish you’d gotten Nara pregnant?”, you joke, and he chuckles.

“You know what I meant.”, he sighs. “I really can’t believe Jungkook’s going to be a father…”, he trails, covering his face with both of his hands out of frustration.

You stay quiet for a couple of minutes, in complete silence, before you speak. “Jungkook’s not going to be a father, Yoongi.”, you take a deep breath, “You are.”

Yoongi doesn’t say a thing. In fact, he doesn’t even move, he even stops breathing for a solid five seconds, before he sits up on the mattress and whispers an almost inaudible “What?”, and you already feel the tears starting to well up in your eyes as you get up from your shared king size bed and hurry to grab your purse. You then proceed to pull out a couple of pregnancy tests and a piece of paper Yoongi’s never seen before.

“I took one of these the other night.”, you start, showing him the positive pregnancy sticks, placing them on top of the duvet cover, “It started as a joke, I really didn’t think I could actually be pregnant.”

You tell him how Nara’d talked you into taking the test, and how only one of them showed two lines. You also tell him that, the next day, you’d bought two more pregnancy tests and took them first thing in the morning just to make sure, because you never know. You weren’t really expecting two pink lines to show up, and you tell him how you almost fainted right there on the spot. You also tell him that the next day, still shook, you went to the hospital to run some beta blood tests, that confirmed what the sticks’d been telling you all along.

You are pregnant. And what shook you even more was finding out that you are eleven weeks pregnant. You had never missed your period during the past months, however you had to admit it wasn’t like the other times. There was much less blood, and it only lasted a couple of days. You didn’t think that it’d be spotting from implantation.

“I didn’t go to the gynecologist, I wanted to tell you first. I want you there with me.” You don’t even realize you’ve been crying the whole time as you were telling Yoongi the whole story of how you found out you are soon going to welcome your baby to the world.

Yoongi’s crying too. His beautiful, pale skin is soaked in tears as he sniffles and clears his runny nose with the hem of his sweater. “Jagi…”, he sobs, pulling you close for a hug. “Are you serious? Is this real? You’re not joking, are you? Please, please tell me you’re not joking.”, he chokes. He’s so scared you’ll tell him that it’s some kind of sick prank, but it is not.

It’s all true.

“It is, Yoongi. It’s real. We’re having a baby.”, you sob too, soaking his clothes with the tears that are falling from your eyes, but neither of you care. You’ve been waiting so long for this moment, and you don’t care about a damn sweater getting wet.

“Lay down, jagiya, I want to hug you and our baby.”, he wipes some more tears from his beautiful, yet teary eyes.

You nod, laying down, sinking in your soft mattress, and you soon feel Yoongi’s hands pull down your pajama pants just so that he could have better access to your, still pretty imperceptible, baby bump. You muffle your sobs in the sleeve of your sweater as you feel him place a series of light kisses on your belly, before pulling your pants back on, muttering a “That’ll keep you warm” to the baby in your tummy.

He gets up only to change into some comfortable sweats and an oversized t-shirt, before returning to bed to lay next to you under the soft, vanilla scented sheets. He hugs you from behind, his warm hand drawing imaginary shapes on your belly. “I still can’t believe it, jagi, I’m so happy…”, he whispers, placing a kiss on your hair, “I’m going to be a dad.”, you can’t see him, but you know he’s probably smiling from ear to ear.

“Yeah, you are.”, you turn your head to kiss him on the lips. “And you’ll be the best appa, Yoongi.”

He stays quiet for a while, and you think that maybe he fell asleep, when he suddenly speaks again. “Wait, you said eleven weeks?”, he sounds like he’s thinking of something. You nod. “Jagiya… isn’t that when we… you know, in the car, before Taehyung’s house?”

Your eyes widen as you remember that night. Oops. Yup, that must definitely be the night you got pregnant, since you hadn’t had sex in the previous month. Even after that one time in your car, whenever you and Yoongi had sex he’d pull out last minute until you managed to convince him that you seriously were fine with him finishing inside -which took a while, surprisingly. So yeah, that night in the car has to be the night.

“Oh my God, jagiya, I can’t believe we made our baby in the backseats of our car.”, Yoongi chuckles, and you laugh too because really, what are the odds? You’ve had unprotected sex for the last years and you get pregnant the one time you do it in your car?

“Goodnight jagiya, sleep tight.”, Yoongi pulls you closer and kisses your cheek. He then slips one hand into your pajama pants to caress your belly. “Goodnight baby, sleep tight, appa loves you so much already.”

☔︎

Yoongi’s been extra affectionate since he found out he’s going to be a dad.

He asks you how you’re feeling at least ten times per hour, and when he’s not physically there with you, he texts you. It’s not only because he’s protective of you and your baby, but also because he wants to be even more involved in your pregnancy than he already is. He wants to know every little thing that’s happening in your life: every mood swings, every craving, every time you’re feeling nauseous, he just wants to know. He needs to know.

When you went to the gynecologist to make sure you are indeed pregnant, he asked a million questions to your doctor. You believe you won’t ever forget how his eyes were glistening when the obgyn confirmed that your baby is perfectly healthy and your pregnancy’s not at risk. He’s genuinely so happy to finally be able to share all this happiness with you, the love of his life, the mother of his child.

You both agreed you’d tell the news to your friends once you entered your second trimester, just to make sure everything was fine. The day you told them, they were all so happy and congratulated the both of you.

Yoongi bursted into tears when the doctor told you you were expecting a girl. He’d been emotional for the whole day and kept his hand on your belly all the time, caressing your bump as he talked to his daughter, telling her how much he loved her already and how he couldn’t wait to meet her.

“What do you think about Unmyeong?” Yoongi asks all of a sudden.

You’re in bed, Yoongi’s arm is around you and his hand is on your belly. You’re almost at the end of your third trimester now, and you’ve definitely gotten bigger. Still, you and Yoongi haven’t chosen the perfect name for your baby girl. You both kind of want a unique name for her, a name that represents what you feel for her.

“What?”, you ask him, confused.

“Unmyeong.”, he repeats. “For our baby girl. It means destiny.”, he explains.

You stay quiet for a while. Unmyeong. The more you think about it and repeat the name over and over in your head, the more you like it. Destiny.

“I think we were destined to have her, you know?” Yoongi murmurs, nuzzling against your back. “We went through a lot to have a family. But we’re here now, our baby girl’s due date’s in a couple of weeks, and I can’t help but think it’s the destiny that gifted us with her.”

His words make tears well up in your eyes, and you can’t help but believe he’s right. You were definitely destined to have her. After almost four years of negative pregnancy tests and desperate cries, you finally got what you’ve been praying for for so long.

You turn your upper body to meet Yoongi’s eyes, and notice they’re glistening as well. “I like it. Unmyeong… I like it.”, you smile at him.

“You do?”

You nod, smiling at him. “It’s perfect. The perfect name for our perfect baby girl. Min Unmyeong.”

A couple of tears fall from Yoongi’s eyes when he hears the full name for the first time. It’s real, it’s all real, finally. You feel him move under the sheets until he rests his head on your stomach, careful not to hurt you in any way.

“Hi Min Unmyeong. This is appa.”, you can’t stop the tears from streaming down your face as well. “I can’t wait to finally meet you, baby girl. I can’t wait for the three of us to be a family. I love you so much, baby girl. Now sleep tight and let your eomma rest well. Jal ja, baby girl.”

657 notes · View notes