#if you read all these you should listen to ruins of a long gone past by alpine universe

[mysterious-ocarina]

Shinunoga E-Wa (NSFW)

Toge Inumaki x Female!reader

A/N i definetly headcanon that Inumaki listens to Fujii Kaze on blast!! also look at him, he's so pretty ughhhhhh

Main Masterlist JJK Masterlist Requests AO3

(3.6k words)

“Come on, it’s so obvious y/n,” Yuuta sighs. 

“I don’t know what you’re referring to,” you reply defiantly.

About a week ago, Inumaki left for a solo mission. Since then, you have been bothering Yuuta to entertain yourself. You’ve been close friends with him since he came to the school so it wasn’t out of the norm for you to hang out with him a lot of the time.

You’ve had feelings for Inumake since you met him, but you didn’t realize it until Yuuta became desperate to get you to see past your denial. These conversations about your feelings for the cursed speech user happened pretty often.

“You know exactly what I’m talking about,” Yuta stared at you. He started waving his hand around as he spoke, “Anyone with eyes can see the way you look at him, as well as the way he looks at you.”

“We are just best friends. We’re only so close because I was the first student to meet him,” you explained. When he came to the school, you two immediately hit it off. Even with his rice ball language, you always seemed to understand what he was trying to convey. Panda likes to joke that your cursed technique is to read Inumaki’s mind.

As if reading your mind, Yuuta brought this point up, “Then explain how you are so in tune with him. You always know exactly what he’s saying and you guys can just look at each other and have a conversation without saying anything.” Yuta always found it confusing yet fascinating the way that you and Inumaki communicate.

This is the first time when having this conversation with Yuta, that you accepted that he was right. With Inumaki being gone on such a long mission, you’ve come to realize how much you miss him. And without him by your side like he always is, you’ve had a lot of alone time to read into your own mind to figure out how you felt about him. You never realize what you have until it’s gone, you guess.

With a resigned sigh, you finally relented, “Fine. You’re right.”

Instead of teasing you, like Maki or Panda would, Yuuta gives you a soft smile. “Why don’t you tell him then?”

“Are you kidding? I only just figured out these feelings this week. Plus I can’t ruin the friendship that we have,” you wave your hands in Yuuta’s face, trying to convey your issue.

“If he somehow doesn’t have feelings for you, you wouldn’t ruin your friendship. He cares too much about you,” Yuuta comforted you.

As if the universe was listening to the both of you, you saw Inumaki make his way to the tree you and Yuta were under. He had his duffel bag still in his hands, meaning after getting back from his mission he went straight to find you guys.

“Toge,” you screamed, getting up. You ran up to him and wrapped your arms around his neck. The force of your body against his almost made him fall back, but he kept his balance and wrapped his arms around you.

If you weren’t so excited and were paying attention, you would have noticed the painful grunt that fell from Inumaki’s lips from your hug. You also didn’t notice the look that Yuuta shared with him. You weren’t the only one that expressed feelings for the other to Yuta.

-

Later, you and Inumaki were in his room sitting in his bed, plates of food on both of your laps.

Throwing your empty takeout box away, you grabbed the tv remote, “What should we watch? I was thinking like a stupid rom/com.”

Hearing a quiet “salmon” you put on the first movie you saw in the genre list, not caring to read the description at all.

When you watched movies with Inumaki, you guys always cuddled. So it was second nature for you to lay your head on his stomach and wrap your arms around his waist. Inumaki winced at your grip on him.

“Is there something wrong?” you looked up at him. You guys always cuddled so you didn’t think he was uncomfortable with your arms around him.

“Bonito flakes,” he tightly replied, with a shake of his head. He didn’t want you to let go of him.

You didn’t quite believe him but you laid your head down and snuggled closer to him. He tensed again before relaxing a little.

You sat back up, “Spit it out, Inumaki.”

The irony of your statement wasn’t lost on you but you were too focused on what was wrong with him.

Inumaki knew better than to argue with you. He sighed and leaned his head back against the headboard. Pointing at his stomach, “Tuna.”

“What’s wrong with your stomach?” you questioned.

Inumaki sighed and carefully lifted up his school uniform. Normally, the sight of his stomach would send you into a frenzy with how good he looked, but this time was different. His stomach was littered with bruises and cuts presumably from whatever curses he was fighting during his mission.

“Toge,” you whispered, bringing your hand to his stomach. “Rough mission, huh.”

He chuckled at your observation. Most of the cuts had healed but the blue and red marks still showed evidence of the fight.

“Do you still hurt?” you questioned, dropping his shirt. He nodded his head softly.

“I’ll be right back then,” you smiled. He rolled his eyes at you as he watched you walk around his room, grabbing a cloth and then a cup of ice from the mini-fridge.

You sat back down next to Inumaki, fully facing him. You wrapped some of the ice in the cloth before softly laying the cloth on his stomach.

“Turn around. I want to give you a massage for all your hard work,” you broke the silence with a goofy smile.

Inumaki laughed quietly and took the cloth out of your hands, brushing his fingers with yours. The small touch sent electricity flying through you. 

Now that you’ve realized your feelings for him, you’re starting to notice more things you didn’t think you would ever pay attention to. How soft his hands are, the ridges and muscles of his arms, the way his nose crinkles when he snorts at something you said.

These are things you already noticed about Inumaki since knowing him. You simply thought you were an observant person but you never noticed those kinds of things about Maki or Yuta. It was obvious now, why you noticed little insignificant details like that about the boy sitting across from you.

Breaking you from your train of thought, Inumaki turns his body so his back is facing you, offering you a quiet, “Tuna mayo.”

“Right,” you hoped he didn’t see the blush that was blooming across your face and ears.

You laid your hands on his shoulders, rubbing your palms in hard circles. At first, Inumaki tensed at the pressure but soon he sighed and relaxed into your touch. Eventually your hands wandered from his shoulders to his neck then back down towards his arms.

Feeling exceptionally bold, you wrapped your hands around his biceps. Inumaki didn’t need to do much hand to hand combat so you knew that his arms probably did not need massaging. That didn’t stop you from letting your hands wander indulgently. Despite his short and lean stature, you could still feel the hardness of muscles on his shoulders and arms.

Inumaki turned his head to look at you, smirking, “Salmon roe.”

“What are you looking at, Inumaki?” you huffed. You finally released your hands from his body as he turned back around to face you.

He leaned over to his night stand to grab the notebook and pen that were sitting on it. He flipped through hundreds of filled pages and eventually stopped on an empty one. He wrote something before turning the book towards you. 

IDK. I think I’m looking at a beast ;p

“How rude,” you sighed, crossing your arms. You failed to hide the smile that was plastered on your face, sarcastically replying, “If I’m so hard to look at, I think I’ll just leave then.”

You pretended like you were going to get up but Inumaki grabbed your hands forcing you to stay put next to him.

You both giggled at the familiar banter you shared and suddenly you felt as if all your troubles were melting away.

“I really missed you this week, Toge,” you whispered, truthfully.

Toge simply replied with, “Salmon,” looking like he wanted to say more than that.

“Give me your pen,” you commanded. He looked at you confused before doing as told.

You started to write, simply letting the words fly off of your hands and then eventually into Toge’s heart.

I really like you, Toge Inumaki. I miss you when you’re gone and I care exceptionally when you get hurt. You are the most important person in my life and will always have a place in my heart. I would rather die than be separated from you.

You placed the notebook in front of Toge watching as he read your note. He quickly wrote something down too and handed the notebook back to you.

^ ditto

You giggled at him before throwing your arms around his neck, his bruises long forgotten. He grunted at the pain but only pulled you tighter into him.

You buried your face into his neck and started to leave small kisses there. Toge whimpered at the feeling of your lips on him which only encouraged you further. You made a trail of kisses and bites until you made your way to his face. You kissed both of the marks on his cheeks then hovered your lips above his.

He was breathing hard, trying to catch his breath, which made you smile at the effect you had on him. Toge pushed forward, trying to catch your lips, but you pulled back with a teasing smile.

“Do you want to kiss me?” you asked, your voice turning sultry. Toge didn’t expect this kind of teasing from you but he wasn’t complaining. He whined at your words.

“I think you should use your words. How else am I going to know what you want?” you smirked. You were surprised by what you said but you didn’t backtrack.

Toge was beyond surprised at what you asked him to do. He gave you a look as if to ask are you sure which you gave a confident nod to.

Toge wasted no time, whispering, “Kiss me.”

The sound of his cursed speech washed over you, forcing you to bring your lips to his into a passionate kiss. You initially thought that the lack of control on your body would scare you but the longer you kissed Toge, the more the feeling excited you.

The two of you made out for what felt like ages. You weren’t sure when the cursed command gave you control of your body back, still kissing Toge like you wanted to steal away his breath. 

Toge pulled back and searched your face. For what, you weren’t sure.

“Mustard leaf?” he asked you, hands fisting your shirt.

“I’m okay. I’m perfect right now,” you replied. You moved yourself to sit on his lap and laid a soft kiss onto his forehead. He sighed and rested his hands on your waist.

“I would love to continue, but only if you’re okay with that,” you offered, shyly. You didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.

“Salmon. Salmon,” Toge replied, excitedly. He kissed all over your face making you giggle. You softly pushed him back until he was laying down and you were hovering above him.

“Can I take this off?” you asked, seductively, holding the edge of his shirt. Toge’s breathing was fast again, heart beating in anticipation.

“S-salmon,” he stuttered. You felt euphoric at hearing the crack in his voice.

You lifted it softly, kissing up his stomach as it was revealed. He helped you pull the shirt all the way off and flung it to the side.

Staring at him like this was a euphoric feeling. You never thought that you would be looking at a shirtless Toge who’s red in the face and breathing so hard.

You focused on his cuts and bruises from his mission, bringing your lips down to kiss each one. Toge whined each time your lips tasted his skin, even bucking his hips up in search of friction.

You sat on his lap to keep him still, “Be patient. Let me admire and take care of what’s mine.”

Your words sent a shiver down his body making him whine again.

Kissing your way down his stomach you stopped just above his shorts, tugging on the waistband. You looked back up to his red tinted face and made him watch you pull his shorts off until he was only in his briefs.

“Tuna mayo,” he breathed.

“You want me to take mine off too?” you questioned innocently. “I don’t know if you deserve it. You left your girl all alone this week.”

You both knew that a mission is important and can’t be skipped, that didn’t stop you from teasing him.

“Bonito flakes,” he moaned, shifting his hips under you, desperate for anything.

“Fine, I’ll stop teasing,” you sighed. You stood up and stripped down to nothing. Inumaki watched you with rapt attention, not letting his eyes leave you once.

Once you had nothing on, you sauntered back over to him and sat on his legs. You bent over him, kissing him until he was breathing hard again. The feeling of your bare chest on his as well as the heat that was radiating from your core was sending him into a frenzy.

He moaned into the kiss, encouraging you to get a move on. You bent until your face was inches away from the tent in his briefs. You blew air on him and watched as he squirmed at the lack of touch.

Eventually, you stopped teasing and pulled his briefs off. His cock jumped to life, now freed of its confines. You drooled at the sight of him, all flushed and pink.

“Geez, Toge. Didn’t know you were hiding this under all those clothes,” you giggled. He had the prettiest dick you have ever seen. It was the perfect length to fit anywhere you wanted it to.

Inumaki chuckled at your joke before whining again when you softly grabbed him. You put one hand on his cock and one hand massaging his thighs. You let your hand roam his thighs, feeling the lithe muscles twitch under your palms. 

Inumaki’s breathing steadily increased as he watched you, patiently waiting for you to do anything. Eventually, you stopped teasing and moved your hand, jerking him off. You hadn’t put your mouth on him yet, so it wasn’t all that lubricated. You decided to fix that.

You put the head of his cock in your mouth, flicking your tongue on the underside of it. He moaned at the feeling of your lips around him and you moaned at the taste of his precum.

You put your mouth to work, drooling a bit to add lubrication for your one hand to jerk him off. You jerked him off switching between a fast pace and a slow pace. He was writhing in place letting pretty moans and whimpers fall from his lips.

You unwrapped your lips from him to catch your breath, licking the underside of his cock instead. Inumaki placed a hand in your hair, not to guide you but simply to ground himself.

As you held his balls in one hand and licked the bottom of his cockhead, he quickly pulled you off of him with a drawn out moan. He was breathing extremely hard and you knew that he stopped you from making him cum.

“Why don’t you wanna cum, babyboy?” you asked with an “innocent” head tilt. You brought your head down to kiss along a bruise on his stomach, careful to not put too much pressure as to hurt him.

“Tuna mayo,” Inumake responded. He looked extremely frustrated. You couldn’t tell if it was because he basically edged himself or the fact that he couldn’t voice what he was thinking about.

Inumaki placed a hand on his face and leaned back with a sigh. Worried that something was wrong, you sat back on his legs and stopped touching him.

“Is something wrong, Toge? We can stop if you want too, I won’t be mad,” you asked. You gave him a comforting smile so he knew you were being sincere.

“Bonito Flakes,” he quickly responded, shaking his head and hands in a no motion. You giggled at his expression.

“If you don’t want to stop, then what's wrong?” you asked, a sultry tone overtaking your voice again.

You crawled up his body so your face was closer to his. You kissed him, hoping to calm whatever nerves he may have had. You stopped upon having a realization, saying, “Would you like to tell me what to do, Toge? Is that what’s wrong?”

Inumaki gave you a dubious expression before slightly nodding his head. You would have missed the motion if all your senses weren’t in tune with his.

You gave him a wide, but comforting smile, “I don’t mind. I would love to try that if you’re okay with that. I have to admit that I’ve thought of it before.”

You had a crimson tint on your face at your admission but you trusted Inumaki with every fiber of your being so you didn’t have to be embarrassed.

Inumaki stared at you like you had hung the stars in the sky, a loving smile adorning his pretty face. You leaned down, kissed each mark on his cheeks before giving him a real kiss on his lips.

“You can command me to do more than just kiss you. I trust you,” you told him. Faces inches apart, he breathed a sigh before kissing you more.

With a raspy, yet pretty, voice, he commanded, “Ride me.”

Immediately, your body moved down until your cunt was hovering above his cock. Without hesitation, you slowly slid down until he was fully sheathed in you, both of you moaning at the euphoric feeling.

The best part about his command, you noticed, was that your thighs weren’t getting tired. You rode him with extra fervor that you might not have been able to otherwise. You placed your hands on Inumaki’s neck, leaning down to catch his lips.

He placed his hands on your hips to guide your movements until he was hitting the perfect spot inside you that left spots dotting your vision.

His command must have been wearing off because soon you could feel the burn of your thighs, constant movement and the stuttering of your hips. As you struggled to focus on riding him, Inumaki kept his hands on your waist to keep you still as he pistoned his hips up into you.

The both of you were moaning so loud that there was no way other people hadn’t heard you guys. That thought left your brain as soon as it came, distracted by the feel of Inumaki.

You leaned down a final time, catching a kiss from Inumaki, moaning into his mouth.

“I love you, Toge Inumaki,” you gasped between moans. Toge smiled and pounded into you harder.

“Cum, please,” he commanded begged. With a sharp cry of Toge’s name, you came. The feeling of your walls fluttering around him made him groan before he spilled all he had into you.

Inumaki guided your hips, until the both of you gradually stopped moving at all, prolonging the euphoric feeling of both of your orgasms.

With Inumaki’s cock still buried deep in you, you laid down on his chest, careful to not put too much pressure on the scattered bruises. He brought his hands up until his arms circled you.

You both laid in the aftermath of sex, basking in the feel of each other's embrace. You whined when Inumaki finally pulled out of you, getting up. He grabbed the towel from earlier, the ice now fully melted, and used the wet cloth to clean the both of you up.

He then sat against the headboard, bringing you closer to him until you were laying against his side. He leaned over to grab the forgotten notebook and pen and scribbled some words down.

I love you more than words can say. I wish more than anything I could say that to you.

You grabbed his face, pressing a kiss to his nose, then a kiss on his lips when he pouted at you. You gave him a loving smile before responding, “You don’t have to say it, for me to know it. I can see it when you look at me, or open doors for me, or even when we’re sparring and I beat your ass.”

Inumaki rolled his eyes at your last remark, giving you a small chuckle. You giggled as you stared at him, completely enamored by the boy in front of you.

You were kissing again when Inumaki’s phone lit up with multiple texts. He picked it up to show you, it was the group chat.

maki n cheese 🍜 <could you guys keep that shit down??? you sounded like pornstars and I was trying to eat in peace

BAMBOO DESTROYER 🐼🎍 <took you guys long enough

yuuta okCUTsu 🤺 <congrats guys ! 🎉🎊

inumaki 🙊 > /(/ /o/_ /o/ /)/

maki n cheese 🍜 < don’t blush you idiot. It’s your own fault for sounding like wild animals

Inumaki put his phone down, giggling to himself. You joined in giggles, embarrassed, but way too happy to care about a thing. The both of you laid together for the rest of the night, enjoying each other’s presence.

#inumaki #jujutsu kaisen #inumaki toge #toge inumaki #toge inumaki x reader #toge inumaki smut #toge inumaki x you #female reader #inumaki x reader #inumaki smut #jujustsu kaisen x reader #fanfiction

[yantalia545]

Yandere Axis and Allies with a runaway bride attempt

☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆💍☆*: .｡. .｡.:*☆

This was the most perfect day of his life.

Finally.

After all this time; These years even. He finally has you within his grasp.

Today will mark the day he finally got it all; Money, power, you. Nothing in the world could make this perfect day any better. Maybe if you actually reciprocated his feelings.

Everything was in perfect order. It's taking many months to plan this whole day down to the very last detail but it was worth it. All that was missing was your beautiful form to walk through those doors and waltz up to him every so slowly so he could take in every inch of this marvelous moment.

He won.

Germany: 

Bold of you to assume that running away would have been an option.

Of course, he thought about you trying to pull some last-minute stunt and has planned accordingly.

He would have liked you to use logic over emotions and realize that at this point there would be nothing you could do to stop this wedding from taking place when you and your boss have already signed the papers. The ceremony is more for his own pleasantries. Germany's fought tooth and nail for this and he's not about to rush through his victory. He had dreamed of this moment for a long while and had read anything he could get his hands on to fully prepare for this moment and he’d be damned if you’d ruin this.

Germany isn’t stupid and had a suspicion that you would try to pull something like this and came fully prepared.

He thought the extended amount of guards would have kept you in place but apparently not. On the off chance that you have managed to get passed his most trusted men, he was prepared for that too. His men would be sent out at the first brush of finding out you got away and be quick to hunt you down. Hopefully, before the entire day was ruined.

Yeah, good luck trying to get away from this one. Best to try running away after the two of you get home from the honeymoon, but be warned, Germany has well prepared the house for you too.

Japan:

He should have known you would pull something like this. You did seem just a little too excited about having a wedding. Japan would have preferred a quiet wedding between just the two of you, but you were admin about a bigger and more public wedding that he went along with it. It was foolish of him to imagine that your decision was a sign of you finally giving into him.

Japan is a very collected man so no one can really understand how much he’s bubbling with rage after you to get him all worked up over a big wedding and just ditch him in front of everyone. He won’t say a thing to anyone when he hears the news that you’re gone, but the game is on.

He won’t involve anyone in his search for you. Japan wants to be the one to personally hunt you down and make you his. He wants to see the exact moment that your hope washes away when you realize you’ve been caught. When you realize that you belong to him and there’s nothing you can do to change it.

Italy:

The poor man is a mess. Not even a minute passes past the queue for you waltz down the isle and he’s already breaking down.

This doesn’t work in your favor one bit. Once the water works break through, everyone is quick to take Italy’s side on the matter. How could you leave such an innocent man standing at the alter like that?

Believe me, you’ve tried to get others to believe all the horrible things that Italy is capable of when no one’s looking, but no one ever seems to listen. How can anyone suspect that Italy is purposefully doing anything bad? Italy is so sweet and innocent that it must be you just misunderstanding things or just you making them up to try to make Italy look bad.

You thought that if no one would believe you then running away would just make things better but Italy is too sneaky for his own good.

Why else are the two of you getting married now? If you won’t stay willingly then he’ll just have to make sure that you can’t leave him.

Russia:

It’s been over fifteen minutes since the ceremony was supposed to start and you’re still not here. Russia was holding the benefit of the doubt that you were just as nervous over the most wonderful day of his life, just as he was. He knew he couldn’t seek you out himself since, according to traditions in weddings, it was considered bad luck for couples to see each other before the ceremony. 

Even though the others countries were well aware of your situation and were forced to attend this horrific day by Russia, some couldn’t help but feel some sense of remorse from Russia as he arrogantly stood at the alter, waiting for a woman who would never arrive. Then there were some like America and Prussia mostly, who were fighting the urge to laugh at the poor man’s rejection. 

His smile never left his face when the realization does hit him that you’ve gotten away somehow. All your loved ones are sitting amongst the crowd of people in front of him currently, right? All he has do is show you just the kind of man he is and what he’s willing do for you and you’ll come right back to him yourself.

You really didn’t think this one through, did you?

America:

He was a little pissed off that he put all of this time and money into making your wedding the most amazing and extravagant wedding anyone has ever seen, but at the same time, he couldn’t help but fall in love with you even more.

America is a very strong-headed man, so it only makes sense that he’d fall in love with someone who’s also like him. A strong-headed darling would only inspire him to do better. To him, this is just another game of tug-of-war between you two and he can’t help but feel exhilarated about it all. You really are perfect for him. You really do know how to keep him on his toes and constantly test his wits.

You running away only makes securing you all the more interesting and indefinite for America. Oh believe me, you will be his and he will put an end to this little game of yours, but your defiant nature just makes it more rewarding for him in the end. You just don’t know it yet!

England:

So, you thought you could pull a stunt on your perfect day together and run away without consequences? Or better question, did you think he was going to stop pursuing you just because you exposed him in front of everyone?

Bad move.

Its seems that you haven’t figured it out that what he was doing was considered just a tip of the iceberg of the things he’s willing to do in order to obtain you. England thought you would have noticed that he was trying to be civil about the whole matter but if you want to be a brute about it then he’s not going to hold back either.

England isn’t going to waste any time over the matter either. He’ll send his troops out to retrieve you the moment you set foot outside the church. When your caught, and believe me it won’t take long, he’ll have you watch as he burns your country to the ground; literally.

If you won’t come to him peacefully then he’ll show you all that he’s capable of. Maybe then you’ll learn to be more appreciative of his good grace if there’s nothing for you to build upon without him. The others would be wise to stay out of it too if they don’t wish to end up in a similar position as you.

China:

It's funny actually. Did you really think he was stupid enough to believe that you wouldn't try to leave today of all days? He's not young and stupid like the rest of the countries; He plans. And he plans well.

Without you even noticing, he had ordered one of the maids who were fixing up your dress to slip a tracker on you so even if you did manage to escape then he could track you down with ease.

To China, this was all a big cat and mouse game to him. Don't get me wrong here, he is very irritated that you refuse to love him, but if he has to show just how much more power he has over you, then he will get the most he can out of it.

It's all so pitiful to you. You thought you had finally managed to outrun that hellish nightmare, when seemingly out of nowhere, China pops in with a smug look on his face. Mocking you the whole way back to the church.

No matter where you go or how far you run, China will always find you just when you think you're safe.

#hetalia #yandere hetalia #yandere germany #yandere italy #yandere japan #yandere russia #yandere england #hetalia x reader #yandere #yandere america #yandere china

[localhopedealerr]

-Endless Light.-

Okay, finally being brave and trying my hand at this writing thing. Any kindness, advice ,and (helpful) criticism is appreciated!! i hope you all enjoy it! Sorry if its too short.

Azriel x reader fic

Tiny angst( self depreciating Az), fluff.

-Endless Light.-

Azriel had been gone for more than a week. A quick trip to one of the illyrian camps had been extended due to some unruly behavior between the men, the note he sent you going into no further detail than that. He didn’t want you worrying.

It wasn’t unusual for these visits to be extended, and although you prided yourself on being an independent women, you weren’t used to having to go without your mate for so long. You had started to miss his company, and were ready to have him back home. 

Your eyes opened slowly on the seventh night, your body having given over to sleep earlier while you laid reading on Azriel’s side of the bed. The book offering you peace from your now constant longing.  You mind and body thrummed, feeling the presence of your mate finally back within the walls of your home. You didn’t hesitate to leave the bed, now wide awake and eager to place your eyes on him to finally soothe your worries. 

Your steps were quiet as you made your way down the stairs, arms wrapping around yourself, as your head peaked past the corner, finally spying the winged male.

He looked like he had all but fallen straight into the armchair upon his arrival, his hair disheveled from his flight home , still dressed in his leathers, siphons gleaming. A picture of a lethal warrior, usually. But you saw the sag of his shoulders, something pained in his expression. He gripped a glass of amber liquid in one hand, while his Hazel eyes stared off distractedly into the fire before him. 

It wasn’t unusual for Azriel to get like this, the toll of dealing with the brutes in the mountains affected him more than he’d ever let on out loud. You had seen the change in his attitude upon arriving home from missions like these enough. Knew better than to assume he was ‘just tired’. Their actions against the females made your stomach churn, even if your mate left out most of the horrific details when recalling them to you. You couldn’t imagine having to witness those crimes in person. Having to feel responsible for them.

You knew he heard you wake, no doubt listening for your soft steps as you silently made your way through the house to find him, arms wrapping around him as you leaned over the back of the chair to embrace his shoulders. 

“Hello Shadowsinger.” Your lips murmured against his neck, pressing a soft kiss where your words ghosted against warm skin. “Why haven’t you come to bed?” 

His free hand lifted up to rest against your own that intertwined at the center of his chest, his body finally seeming to release some of the tension that sat coiled within his bones. 

“I didn’t want to ruin our reunion with my bad attitude.” His eyes glanced up to look up at your own for a moment before returning back to the burning fire. The churning in his eyes gleamed in the glow, the orange hues highlighting the sharp planes of his face as he continued to contemplate whatever plagued his mind. 

“ Should i be afraid to ask how it went this week?” You questioned, reaching out and stealing the drink from his hands to take a sip of it yourself. The amber liquid burned against your throat as you swallowed, and you couldn’t hide your grimace as you set the glass back down in his hand. Azriel smirked, the first positive emotion he’s shown you. 

He leaned back against the chair, a lock of his hair falling over his eyes as a breath left his body. “Sometimes it just doesn’t even seem worth it, you know?”

“What doesn’t seem worth it?” You asked softly. 

“ War. Battles. Constantly being at odds with the Illyrians over barbaric customs.” His eyes looked over and locked with yours, an unavoidable pang ringing through your chest at the helplessness that swam within them. “ But then I remember you. I think about what I would do if you were one of them. And it makes me want to split this whole world in two. But it drains me completely some days. I feel like I- I'm never going to do enough for them.”

You moved then, coming around the chair to seat yourself in his lap, blocking his view of the fire. Your arms wrapped around him and your lips met his finally. And although he’d been traveling all day, and hadn’t had a chance to properly wash up, his lips were still the softest thing Y/N had ever known. Soft like the first snowfall. Soft like melting and floating and being weightless in water. So effortlessly perfect.

You pulled back to study his face, your fingers tangling into the hair at the base of his neck. You could never understand how you got so lucky to have him as a mate. A male who had such compassion and depth inside of him, a light that seemed endless, even when it had endured so much.The world was surely a better plsce with his soul in it.

“ You are incredible. You have no idea the change you are bringing to the people you save. I mean, their whole world is changed because you stepped in. They have a chance at a  better life because of you. That will always make it worth it. Whether you chose to see it or not, you are doing more than enough.” 

His cheeks heated, and in an effort to hide the affect your kind words had on him, he leaned in to press another long kiss to your lips. He communicated everything he couldn’t put into words through the kiss, the gratitude for his mate seeping into the bond between the both of you

"I missed you." He murmured, lips still touching your own.

You untangled yourself from him when you both finally broke apart, cheeks heated and lips swollen. Your hand extended out to him in an offer. Ready to take him upstairs with you. A feline smile gracing your face. 

 “ Well then, come show me how much you missed me.” 

#acotar #azriel x reader #azriel acotar #azriel spymaster #azriel shadowsinger #shadowsinger x reader #Acotar fanfic #rhysand #mating bond #a court of thorns and roses #azriel fluff #acotar fandom #acotar series #Shadowsinger #spymaster #fluff #azriel fic #azriel fanfic #sarah j maas #acotar headcanon #acotar smut #Acotar writing #acotar fluff #acotar x reader #reader insert

[brookheimer]

i honestly can’t believe (i sorta can but also don’t?) that gerri is leaving waystar royco. like she fought so so hard and kinda enjoyed being interim-CEO? was roman truly the last straw or are we missing something? i know this is her divorce revenge dress era but i believe gerri could survive so much more

no i feel you honestly — i mean, gerri was waystar royco and vice versa. it’s hard to imagine waystar without her or her without waystar. but i think that’s kinda the point in some ways. i mean, i’m not sure how permanent the decision to leave is going to be given this is the They’re Doing The Thing They Said They Weren’t Going To Do?! show but i wouldn’t be surprised or upset if it is final. i actually kind of like it, maybe. you are completely right that gerri could survive so much more, and honestly, i think that has been her mindset for years — i can survive this, i can survive far worse than this. that’s a big part of why she’s stayed even during these horrific past few months, i think: she knows she can deal, she knows she can weather it, she knows she can survive it. but… just because you can survive something doesn’t mean you have to.

i think that’s what roman’s firing shifted for gerri — it wasn’t that this particular action of his was beyond the pale and she just couldn’t deal with it any longer, but that gerri was suddenly faced with a waystar-less future for the first time in decades and she realized…. holy fuck, why AM i still here? why DO i put up with this? am i staying just to prove that i’m capable of staying, and if so, how does that benefit me at all? is it a sunk cost fallacy thing, and if so, isn’t it called a fallacy for a reason? what am i actually getting out of this? how does this serve my interests?

at least that’s my read — it’s not just that the firing was the straw that broke the camel’s back, but also served as a lightbulb moment that made gerri realize that just because she CAN weather it doesn’t mean she SHOULD. it was a reality check on a multitude of fronts — if after all this time she still held out some hope for a business partnership with roman, for the potential she knows was there to unearth itself once more, then the firing functioned as a rude awakening, making her realize what logan did long ago: these are not serious people. and even more importantly, it forced her to think about a life outside of waystar, something i assume she genuinely has not thought about in… i don’t even know, 30 years? waystar was an immovable aspect of her identity until suddenly it wasn’t, and being forced to look out into a waystar-less future made her realize “wait, why the fuck AM i putting up with this?” logan is gone. the company is spiraling downwards. it’s crisis after crisis. no one respects or listens to her. waystar is headed towards fascism and ruin and humiliation. meanwhile…. she could make millions upon millions, do whatever the fuck she wanted (if she wanted to keep working, she could get hired quite literally anywhere with her record), control her own narrative and go out with a bang, and on top of all that, not be tied to a sinking ship steered by a captain who psychosexually loves/hates/misses/avoids her and makes her life hell. she realized roman would never be the person she wanted him to be, but even more than that, why did it matter to her in the first place? everything that kept her at waystar is going going gone. she does not need waystar. waystar needs her.

so the question isn’t really “couldn’t she survive this?” in my opinion — it’s “why would she?” how does it serve her interests? and…. well, it doesn’t. staying at waystar after realizing that would be breaking the number one rule of being gerri kellman: only do what serves your interests. and now that waystar and her interests no longer align, what would she stay for, sentimentality? no. fuck that. she’s going to buy an island and become ceo of some other news conglomerate and drink her martinis in fucking peace because gerri does what’s best for her and god knows that isn’t waystar anymore — and, frankly, it hasn’t been for a long time. she was just so busy surviving, so GOOD at surviving, that maybe she forgot she didn’t need to.

#did i really just write gerri meta. ok fuck yeah #many thoughts #succession spoilers #succession #gerri kellman #long post #asks #anon #100 #succession meta

[pearljen-blog]

Renovations with Joel Miller - 05

Chapter  05 - Camping with Joel Miller

You go on a hike and camping trip with Joel as your official first date. 

This chapter is mainly smut, so please only read on if you are comfortable with it.

When I write this, I have the video game version of Joel in my mind, but can be changed to the HBO version if preferred. Taking place pre outbreak in Austin Texas.

Masterlist

Pairing: Joel Miller x afab reader

Warnings: This is my first published story, which in itself should be a warning / Reader is afab and has medium - long hair/ swearing / Smut! This is 18 + only

Warnings: This is 18+ content. Please do not interact with this content if you are under the age or do not generally like smutty content. Adult themes and language used below the cut.

‘Beautiful hike.’ You pick up the conversation again. 

He looks at you and you can feel his eyes wandering up and down your whole body. ‘Yeah, beautiful indeed.’ 

With that you feel your body moving, slowly starting to close the distance between you and him and finally kneel next to him. Your hands linger over his chest until you are half draped over him. Your gaze meet, but not a word is spoken between you. Joel takes a strand of your hair and tucks it behind your ear. You smile softly and he pulls you down into a gentle kiss. 

Brian and Matt are finally gone.

You paid your dues; you brought them to the airport on time and you said goodbye. Neither one of you were willing to discuss the argument with Joel, and they didn’t know that Joel was still working for you. You would fill them in eventually. 

At the end of the day, your mind what set on Brian not being allowed to ruin this for you.

 ***

Joel and Tommy show up again on Tuesday morning, just like Joel promised. They were already around when you came back from the airport. 

You meet them upstairs, unsure what the mood would be like. When you approach closer you see Tommy first on the stairwell. 

‘Hey.’ You say unsure. 

‘Hey Y/N.’ Tommy smiles at you, kind of like he was expecting something. 

You are unsure whether he’s just being friendly or trying to indicate something. 

‘All good?’ You simply offer. 

‘Yeah.’ 

More smiling. 

‘What’s up Tommy? What did you hear?’ 

‘I had my brother asking me last night to babysit my niece next weekend. Something important came up. Would you know anything about that?’ 

‘I don’t know…’. You look down and purposely confused. ‘Keep talking.’ 

Joel finally walks in to break the awkward conversation. ‘Don’t listen to him. He’s just being a dick.’ 

‘Oh, am I now? Careful what you say, I can be busy this weekend real quick.’

Joel is looking at you, apologizing without saying anything. He walks past you but catches your shoulder with a soft touch. A look from him can send shocks down your spine. His touch, however quick and soft, can keep you dead in your tracks without any warning. You try and play it off, and hope to god, none of them realise.

At the end of the workday, Joel comes over to you and takes you aside for a second.

‘Hey, got a minute?’

‘For you always…’. He smiles at your response.

‘How did it go with your brother?’ 

‘Ehm well… As it is tradition in our family, we just ignore each other and avoid the elephant in the room.’ You look at Joel but he’s not yet responding. 

‘We didn’t really talk about it and I’m not sure we will. This is not the first time he walked all over my feelings.’ 

‘I’m sure he means well at the end of the day. Sorry to hear you couldn’t rectify things.’ 

‘It’s ok. I will give him a call eventually. See if the mood shifted.’ 

There is a small pause, where both of you just look at the ground. Joel eventually leans on the side of the house, with is arms crossed. 

‘Listen about the weekend.. I asked Tommy to watch Sarah. Should be fine, as long as we come back Sunday reasonably early.’ 

You nod and smile in agreement.

‘Yeah, sounds good. Any idea where to go? You know the area much better than me.’

‘Around here actually. I can pick you up on Saturday and show you some of the trails we explored back in the days.’

‘Sounds like a plan. Really looking forward to it.’

‘Yeah me too.’

Joel quickly touches your arm and walks to the car to finish packing for the day. You realise that these soft little touches are his way of showing affection. There’s not a lot of words, and he never gives hugs or otherwise indicates closeness. But he keeps finding these seconds of touching you ever so gently; just for a brief second.

***

Saturday is fast approaching, and you are seriously counting the hours. That feeling in the bottom of your stomach keeps coming up, whenever you allow yourself to keep thinking about the possibilities. Spending the day with Joel. Spending the night with Joel. You find it increasingly hard to concentrate on work, or any other activity for that matter. This man has completely clouded your mind.

You also took the opportunity to send a text to your brother, not quite ready for a phone call.

The Miller brothers are still working on the house. I have asked them to stay on. Let me know when you’re free to chat.

To be honest, you don’t really expect your brother to apologies or talk things out like grownups. Any talk at this point would just lead to another argument. But your intentions of a conversation between the two of you are now laid out to him and you don’t regret your decision.

You are happy that both Joel and Tommy continue to work on your house and the mood hasn’t suffered. It’s been nearly two months now since they started working on the property and the progress has been amazing.

***

Joel texted you the night before.

I will try and be at your place at around 9am.

At 9:30 you saw Joel pulling up to your driveway. You were packed and ready to go and keeping busy in the makeshift kitchen at your place until he arrived. 

When you meet him outside, you weren’t even sure about the proper greeting. You know he’s not into hugs, so you just casually cross the distance to his car. 

He’s looking at you with a smirk on his face when he gets out of the car, but doesn’t approach you directly. Instead, he’s opening the back door behind the driver’s seat. 

‘The trunk is full, so best if you put your items on the backseat. Should be enough space.’ 

Joel keeps holding onto the car door and leans on the vehicle slightly. You wonder if he’s equally as nervous as you are.

‘Yeah, let me get my stuff. It’s not much for the one night.’

You start walking back inside but can see him following slightly behind you. 

‘You said you have a tent and sleeping bags right? I have some as well but will leave them here otherwise. To be honest I’m not sure the last time these were washed.’ You look over your shoulder and give him an apologetic look. 

‘Leave them here, we won’t need them.’ 

‘Well, if I freeze to death this will be on you.’ You jokingly reply. 

‘I’ll be sure to keep you warm sweetheart.’ 

There it was again; that feeling in the pit of your stomach. You don’t allow yourself to face Joel all the way, but you realise he’s looking right at you, one hand at the back of his neck. 

‘I count on it.’ Is all you reply when you finally gain control over yourself again. 

When you are settled and ready to go, you get yourself comfortable on the passenger seat. The drive over is mainly occupied by you asking questions about Sarah and the hike he has planned. It’s only about a half hour drive until you are at your destination. Joel is taking some extra time to find parking, seeing that you are planning to leave the car overnight. 

‘There are several options here. A smaller round, which is nice but a bit too short I believe. There’s an 8-mile hike and one a little longer. Both are great, but the first one has better views. Great for camping as well.’ 

‘Great! I’m just happy to finally hear some of your hiking recommendations. You promised me some when we initially met.’ You tease him. 

‘Ah yeah I did. Well now you get the private tour hun. Follow me.’ 

You both hit the trail with your backpacks on and get into an easy and enjoyable pace. Joel carrying the heavier load, including the tent and some other small items you’ll need tonight. 

‘There’s a stretch later on where it goes uphill for a bit. But there’s a nice place to build camp. Really worth it.’ 

‘Whatever you say Miller.’ 

‘Well, that’s good to know.’ 

Joel is still somewhat hesitant to share anything about his life but a lot more relaxed than usually. He tells you about the real last holiday he’s been on in Mexico with Sarah when she was 8. That he was born in Arlington Texas, but his parents moved to Luling when Tommy was born. How he used to ride motorcycles but hasn’t touched one in nearly 10 years. 

You share a little more about yourself as well and feel yourself agreeing to the few sentiments you get from Joel. At some point you finally feel brave enough to ask Joel about something that’s been in the back of your mind for weeks now. 

‘Joel can I ask you something?’ 

‘What is it?’ 

‘I hope I’m not overstepping something here, but I wonder where Sarah’s mother is, and what part she has in your life?’ 

‘She’s not around. Nothing to worry about.’ 

There is no follow up or further explanation from Joel. She’s not around. Is she dead you wonder. Is she living in a different state? 

‘I’m only asking because I don’t want to step into something unresolved. I would at least like to know what..’ 

‘She’s not around!’ Joel cuts you off before you can finish your sentence. 

He holds in place and gives you as serious of a look as you have only seen with your brother around. You’re not sure how to respond. Obviously, you have hit a sore nerve here, and you stop pushing immediately. 

‘I understand.’ Is all you reply quietly. Joel nods and continues walking like nothing happened. 

The mood feels strained for a bit until Joel breaks the silence. 

‘Not much further now, we can build the tent and explore some more. It’s early still.’ 

‘I trust you Joel.’ 

You continue your walk and feel both of you relax into a better rhythm again. The landscape is beautiful. You appreciate walking in the shadow a bit, after every other bend, as the sun is punishing outside. Joel is able to point out points of interest once in a while, but you can hear the lack of confidence in voice. Clearly, it’s been a few years since he’s last been here. 

After roughly two hours of hiking, you find a spot that feels safe and secure enough to build the tent. Building the tent and moving your things inside is surprisingly straight forward. You enjoy the banter around it; teasing Joel when he can’t get the last pole in place. Overall, you believe this seems to be where he’s most content and in his element. Out in nature and working with is hands. 

You decide to walk for another hour or so before you feel tired enough and in need of some rest. When you return to the tent, you can feel the butterflies coming up again in your stomach. Unsure on how you’ll spend the next 12 hours together. 

‘Do you mind if I skip in quickly and chance? I got really sweaty at some point.’ You ask to break the tension. 

‘Of course not, go ahead.’ 

You move inside the tent and start unpacking your backpack slightly. You brought some spare clothing just for this scenario; either getting dirty or too sweaty. When you are done changing, you call out to Joel. 

‘I’m good. You can come in if you need to.’ 

Joel opens the zipper of the tent and throws his backpack in first, before he crawls in after. It’s getting crowded inside the tent immediately and you’re not sure where to direct your gaze. He’s unpacking roughly and asks if  you’re hungry. You were snacking throughout the walk so you decline for now. 

‘By the way, I packed some of this. Not sure if you’re a fan of it, but thought I’d offer.’ You say and hand him a hip flask. He takes it from you and smells it. 

‘Oh yeah. I’m a fan.’ He smiles and takes a small sip before handing it back to you. You take a sip yourself and feel the burn down your throat and the warmth in your belly. 

While you are sitting with your legs crossed, Joel has lied down completely on one of the sleeping mats. Slightly propped up on his backpack and pillow and one leg cocked. He’s looking absolutely delicious this way and you can’t keep you eyes off him anymore. 

‘Beautiful hike.’ You pick up the conversation again. 

He looks at you and you can feel his eyes wandering up and down your whole body. ‘Yeah, beautiful indeed.’ 

With that you feel your body moving, slowly starting to close the distance between you and him and finally kneel next to him. Your hands linger over his chest until you are half draped over him. Your gaze meet, but not a word is spoken between you. Joel takes a strand of your hair and tucks it behind your ear. You smile softly and he pulls you down into a gentle kiss. 

The kiss is long and slow; both of you enjoying the closeness. Soon enough though, you can feel Joel’s hands all around your body and pulling you even closer. The intensity of the kiss and his movements increasing exponentially. Your upper body is completely draped over him, and you have slipped one leg over his thigh. 

Both of his hands are trailing up you lower back under your shirt. You take the forward approach and take your shirt off to toss it to the side. His hands immediately go back to touching you, this time moving to your torse and up to your covered boobs. He helps you to take of your bra as well, and his hands are right back on you. You can feel his hardening cock though his pants between your draped over leg. Just like last time, he’s making no excuses and takes in your body with hungry eyes. 

You push up his shirt but he won’t take it all the way off just yet. Amazed still by his broad chest and strong arms, you can’t help yourself from roaming your hands over him. You can feel your cunt squeezing just from touching him, still fully clothed. You’re senses are exploring all of Joel.. His ridged body, his manly smell, his harsh grip up and down your body. 

‘I’m a little nervous.’ You admit, and slightly sitting up. It’s true, and likely the reason you left his house last time. 

‘It’s ok babe.’ He simply looks at you, backing off slightly with the intensity and softly touching your skin. 

When you nod, he takes the initiative and starts unbuckling his belt, still lying down. You can’t control your gaze following his hands down to his crotch and you bite your bottom lip in response. After opening his belt and pants slightly, he sits up with you and holds your face in his hand softly. 

‘I believe this is what you want as well. But tell me no anytime pretty.’ 

‘Oh no, I want this. Believe me, I do.’ You look at him reassuringly and grab onto his elbow to confirm. 

To proof your point, and with a wave of confidence that his sweet nicknames are instilling in you, you sneak one of your hands up to his crotch and into his pants. His face moves slightly, but you both never break eye contact. You slowly push him back down to the mat and take position between his legs. You can feel the stiffness, not just in his cock but through his whole body and you are now on your own personal mission to allow this man to fully relax. 

Slowly you guide his pants further down, until his underpants and tip of his hard cock are showing. His visible girth is a surprise to you, and you’re not hiding your reaction.

You scootch all the way down between his legs and give Joel one more doe eyed look to confirm your intentions. Then you take out his cock fully and start running your hand up and down slowly. The girth making it nearly impossible to grab your hand fully around him. 

Your face moving but inches away from his hard dick. You slowly start taking the tip into your mouth and you close your eyes because your own desire is burning deep inside you. Your hand still wrapped around him, you start bobbing your head further down, coating his cock in your own spit to ease the friction. When you look up and make eye contact for a second you see Joel’s eyes completely fixed on you, though slightly squinting and jaw tight. Your face is now moving up and down in regular strides, without feeling uncomfortable. 

He takes one of his hands, and softly brings it near your ear to guide your movements. He’s not pushing you, but rather looks for a way to be closer and to touch you as well. You could spend the rest of your life going down on this man and never get bored of it. 

After a while, he moves your head up gently and lifts you off his cock. You are surprised but follow his movement regardless. 

‘Take off your pants.’ 

You do as indicated and move away between his legs to utilize the small space of the tent better. You start taking of your leggings, awkwardly as it is  in a confined space where you can’t stand up. When you are done, taking off your pants and underwear you move back closer to him, unsure of what exactly he has in mind. 

‘Sit on my face pretty. Want to taste you.’

You can see the smirk on his face and move in to kiss him first. Quickly and less gentle this time. When you pull away you start moving around to face away from him. One of your legs lifts over his head and for the first time you realise that you are completely naked, while Joel has only dropped his pants to free his cock. 

Once you are settled with your dripping heat over is face, his hands move to your bare ass and push you down further. You are sitting on his face, upright, but in a potential 69 position. The moment his face collides with your cunt, you jolt in excitement and only stay in place because of Joel’s hard grip on you. You can feel him rumbling underneath you and the vibration is causing another wave of arousal washing over you, which you are sure Joel can taste as well. 

He starts kissing around your lips, slowly grazing your clit. You are still getting used to the overwhelming feeling of having him between your legs, pushing you down onto his face. His tongue slowly prodding your entrance and tasting your juices. Your pulse is through the roof, and you slowly start leaning down to take his cock back into your hand. Your movements are slow, very slow. Careful not to disrupt Joel’s precise intrusion with his tongue. 

You move your head back down to take him into your mouth, but you are only half paying attention to your work. Way too occupied by him licking you juices and clit while kneading your ass. When he lets go of one of your cheeks, you also feel him moving away from your entrance. You flex your core slightly, unsure if he wants you to move up. That’s until you feel him pushing one of his fingers inside you. You clench at the intrusion and moan loudly involuntarily, your head now resting on his thigh. 

‘Jesus Christ.’ Is all you here coming from underneath you. 

Joel slowly starts pumping his finger in and out of you, causing your moans to increase. At the same time, you start grinding down onto him in the same rhythm he is setting. He takes his finger out, just to immediately slip back in with two fingers this time. 

‘Joel please…’ You moan your way through each word, while he opens you up. 

You try and give him equal attention, but by now you only give him a sloppy hand job. He’s taken full ownership of your body by fucking you with his fingers and all you can do is melt around him. You sit nearly all the way up again, destined on finding your high while riding his face. He’s kissing your entrance and side of your thighs and you can feel him grazing your clit. When you indicate the jolt of pleasure he’s bringing you with his action, he stays focused on this area and starts to prod your flower with rhythmic strokes. You are sure your moans and calls of his name can be heard from anywhere along the trail at this point. 

You can feel the fire burning in your lower stomach and between your thighs and you grip onto any part you can touch of Joel just to feel him even closer. Your cunt is messy and swollen and you can hear the juices from his fingers pumping in and out of you. The sounds and that feeling turn you on even more. Joel remains as hungry as ever underneath you, and every once in a while you can feel his rumble echo through your pussy. Until finally… The feeling becomes too much for a second and it snaps and throws you over the edge completely. You spasm around his fingers buried inside of you and a loud moan gets stuck in your throat. You ride out the feeling until it becomes physically too much and you have to push Joel’s face and hands away roughly. 

You lift off his face ever so slightly and apologise for being so harsh when he just made you feel so incredibly good. There are slight aftershocks pulsing through you, and you keep twitching for some time after. 

‘It’s ok hun.’ He hums under neath you. ‘This is one pretty view.’ 

You chuckle at his response and start lifting your leg to move off of him. You are all out of energy, so you lie down next to him, one hand on his still covered belly. 

‘Jees, this was amazing Joel. I promise I make it worth your while, just give me a second.’ 

He takes your hand from his belly and moves it to his lips to kiss it softly. His lips and face still wet from your release. ‘Take all the time you need. We have all night and I intend to take full advantage of you.’ 

The thought makes you clench your thighs again right there and then. He’s not even been inside you yet, but you know he won’t leave your mind anytime soon. 

You move up slightly to kiss him again; tasting yourself on his beautiful face. Trailing a hand around his beard and exposed neck. The both of you make out like this for a few minutes until his hands are all over your body again, squeezing and palming your ass. You make a mental note that this seems to get him off like nothing else. 

‘Tell me how I can make you happy Joel.’ 

You move up to look him in the eyes. He made you come so hard and with no expectations, you are willing to offer your body to him to take the same from you. 

He follows you up to tower over you and you can feel his hand on your lower back. 

‘Bend over baby.’ 

You follow his orders and get adjusted on your knees in front of him. Joel gets in position behind you, taking his cock in one hand and your ass in the other. You arch your back slightly, indicating your willingness to offer him whatever he needs from you. 

You suddenly feel both of his hands on your ass cheeks, slightly pulling them apart. There is a moan from behind you, not a sound you have heard before from him and a finger softly sliding from in between your ass, all the way down to your cunt. You can feel your walls squeezing from the filthy images in your mind. Him spreading you open, seeing and touching all your most intimate parts and you can hear the enjoyment from his moans. 

His hand moves back to his cock and you can feel it being lined up with your pussy. The anticipation makes you snap back into reality and you suddenly remember to warn him. 

‘Joel I don’t take the pill.’ 

He stills slightly and replies. ‘I will pull out babe.’ 

When you don’t resist his plan, he starts coating his cock in your juices, dragging it along your cunt several times, close enough to break into you each time. During one of his slides, he does finally put his tip in with no warning ahead. You enjoy and welcome the intrusion but immediately remember just how thick Joel is. He pushes in slightly more until he feels resistance for the first time. He holds onto your hips and starts pulling out slightly before moving in again. A little further this time. Your cunt gives way to him a little more, but you can feel the stretch right away. Your moans are laced with pleasure and pain, and you try your best to keep your hips in place. He repeats the same motion again and tries to breach a bit further each time. 

‘Fuck Joel!’ You hiss at him. 

‘Right here baby. Doing great.’

By the fourth time he’s deep inside of you and you can feel him pushing your walls to it’s limit. It is equally the most vulnerable and fulfilled you have felt in a long time. You are completely at his mercy from now on as Joel has his way with you. 

He starts moving slowly in and out of you. Once you both are steady and confident with the rhythm, you can feel him getting more eager soon after. His grip on you and his thrusts are deep and powerful. He’s not rushing things, but he’s nearly pulling all the way out each time before plunging back into you. You have never been fucked like this before and as much as you try and accommodate him, you have to adjust your stance every so often to keep up. 

Joel is taking all of you, giving you no choice but to give yourself to him. Your body is inviting him and him only, and your mind has crumbled to a willing mess.  His cock feels like a gift send from the gods, moulded for your pleasure. And Joel… he known and fucks you even harder than before. He has one knee bend on the ground and the other foot placed firmly in front of him to gain more leverage. 

Sounds coming from the both of you are just unintelligible words and moans. Mostly yours, but by now even Joel cannot control or hide the noises coming out of his mouth. You feel him so deep inside you, and his grip is still holding you in place by your hips. Joel is relentless and fucks you like you are his to use. 

‘Fuck Y/N. Goddamit.’ 

Suddenly his thrusts become sloppy, and you can feel him lose his steady unforgiving rhythm. When suddenly he pulls out and moves up to come all over your back and ass. He exhales with one long grunt and falters nearly immediately behind you. 

It takes you a few seconds to realise where you are and what just happened. Your mind went completely blind for a second, before Joel finished all over you. You hear him settle behind you and you turn your face around to get a look at him. He gives you a wink before lying down next to you. You are still bend over on your knees until Joel pulls you softly into him, making you nestle right next to him on your belly. 

‘Are you ok?’ 

‘Yeah well just about.’ You joke. ‘You fuck like it’s the end of the world.’ 

‘I really hope that’s a compliment Y/N.’ 

‘Yes, yes it is Joel.’ You play with his shirt over his chest, trailing an imaginary line. He’s softly brushing up and down your arm and you can feel goosebumps popping up right away.

 ‘Are you still playing guitar?’ 

‘Not as much anymore to be honest. Sometimes at the weekend, but even then, it’s mostly work.’ 

‘Will you play something for me some day?’ 

You hear a small huff coming from Joel before he replies. ‘If you really want me to put you through that, yeah sure hun. Maybe I can dust off some old Pearl Jam stuff.’ 

‘Yes, I really want you to put me through that. Please.’ You reply and give him a small kiss to his neck. 

You lie together like this for a little while, enjoying the closeness and comfort between each other. You underestimated how affectionate and cuddly Joel actually is. At least in private he’s a lot more touchy and showers you with sweet nicknames. When he pulls you closer into him, you lean into his advances but remind him of his cum still dribbling down your back. 

‘Careful, I still have your artwork on my back.’ 

‘Oh yeah?’

Joel pulls you by the hip to move you over slightly, just so he can get a better look at your behind. Though mostly dried, part of his juices have travelled down between your ass. He makes no excuse when he pulls your cheeks apart again to get a better look. You can feel his cock spring into action immediately and it brings you absolute joy, knowing the effect you have on this man. 

‘Goddam beautiful.’

He’s kneading one of your ass cheeks now and you can feel yourself getting excited as well. You burry your face into his neck, deeply inhaling his scent and enjoying the rough touches over your skin. 

‘Joel I want you inside of me.’ 

He turns over from you and leads you with him. ‘Anything you want baby.’ 

You push him down again fully, taking control of the situation, because there is nothing you want more in the world right now than having this man underneath and inside of you. Once he’s lying down again and fully at your mercy, you situate yourself on top of him. You grind your wet heat over his lower abdomen and feel his stiff cock hitting your ass. Both your hands have a firm grip on his chest, while you are chasing the beginning of your high, without him even being inside of you.  Joel is looking at you with lustful eyes and letting you take full control. 

‘Take off your shirt.’ You say while halfway already moving it off him. You want to see and feel all of this man tonight. Joel obliges and removes it completely before throwing it to the side of the tent. 

When you feel your dipping cunt clenching around nothing, you start taking his cock into your hands and hover slightly over him. You line up his cock with your hole and slowly, very slowly, lower yourself onto him. Several moans and calls of his name echo through the tent. Joel has a firm grip on your thighs and looks at you with dark eyes. 

Once he’s fully inside of you, you need a second to adjust your position above him slightly, accommodating his size and thickness inside of you. He’s even deeper inside you now and you feel like any movement will throw you over the edge immediately. When you open your eyes and meet his gaze, you can see that he’s just as lost in the moment as you are. There is only the two of you right now, tangled in lust and desire for each other. The world outside this tent has disappeared. 

You slowly start moving up and down his cock. Small movements at first before you have enough strength to increase your pace and take more of him each time. Your cunt is already gushing, and the juices are visible all over him. Each thrust is hitting your clit on your downward movement, and you know you won’t last long this way. 

Underneath you, you can feel Joel panting along with you, now holding you by your waist and accommodating your rhythm. He pushes both of his feet to the ground and slowly starts grinding into you in offset movements. You can feel him getting faster and faster and though you love him pounding into you, just like he did 20 minutes ago, you need him to remain still and allow you to get yourself off on him. 

‘Joel.. let me… just relax.. please.’ 

Your words are interrupted by each trust inside of you and laced with your moans. You push him down gently and indicate your intentions to stay in full control. The rhythm slows down again and you continue your softer movements on top of him. Joel takes the hint and relaxes underneath you. Letting you use his body as you wish, and softly touching you to indicate his approval. His hands roaming your breasts and thighs again. 

‘I’m close..’ You moan and call his name. Your cunt is throbbing, with nerves firing on all ends. Each trust back down onto him is bringing you unbelievably close to the breaking point. You grab onto his chest, unsure if you are possibly hurting him at this point. Your build up is so immense, you are not sure you’ll have enough energy to make it all the way. Your body is now moving on its own, knowing exactly what it needs to claim it’s release. 

When it snaps.. Your release washes all over you and through your cunt. You need to close your eyes, while you are being flooded with all emotions all at once. You squeeze around him and can feel your own release dribbling out of you, covering Joel’s cock and thighs. It takes you a few seconds to be transported back into reality and you continue to squeeze him every few seconds until the aftershocks finally pass. Only then do you let go of his chest, which is now showing clearly visible marks from your hold. 

Joel is still holding onto you and smiling when you do open your eyes. He’s gazing right at you, and you share a deep and intimate look. Saying lots in this moment, without either one of you opening your mouth. 

He slowly guides you off him and back next to him. Your body is still flushed and warm, but you are equally shivering after the comedown. Joel is softly cuddling you and trailing kisses down your neck and shoulders. 

‘That was amazing Joel.’ 

‘Hmmmmm. Felt amazing sweetheart.. you squeezing me like this.’ 

His words get you slightly aroused again, especially with his touches lingering all over your body. You can see that he’s still hard and now increasing the attack of kisses on your naked body. Groping you harder now. You want to get him off as well but are not sure you will ever be able to stand up again. 

‘Joel..’

‘Hmmmm.’ He simply replies and moves you fully on your belly again, with a grip on your waist. 

You try and get onto all fours but are visible still shaken up. Joel is taking notice of your state and helps you stay in position, by placing one of his arms underneath your body. He’s wasting no time, and you can feel him lining up with your entrance again. You are still completely wet, with your juices sprayed all down your thighs. 

Joe pushes in quickly and with little resistance this time. Immediately bottoming out and then starts fucking you in harsh, deep thrusts. You are giving him the last drops of energy you have left, just by remaining in this position he seems to love so much and letting him take you whichever way he wants. You know this is for his own release, and you are willing to present yourself to him to grand him the same holy experience you just had. He’s pounding into you, still holding you up partially and you are clutching onto the mat underneath you, to keep what little control you have left over your body. When he’s close, he grunts and then pulls out of you to come all over your lower back again. There is an immediate silence right after his release. 

Joel remains seated behind you for a second, while you try and remember how to breath. He must clearly enjoy the view of your fucked out body, dripping with his cum. Eventually he gets up, and grabs a towel from his side of the tent to clean himself and your back gently. You take the towel from him to pull it between your legs as well, knowing that you are still completely covered in your own juices from before.

You both fall into the makeshift beds next to each other, sharing some of that drink you brought with you. The evening is still relatively light, and you both enjoy the view to the outside orange and pink sky when you open the tent slightly. The atmosphere lingers on for a little longer and you get lost between talks of your life before you met each other, and sessions of sweet kisses and touches in between.

Eventually you fall asleep next to each other soundly.

Previous Chapter // Masterlist // Next Chapter

#Joel Miller #joel miller smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller fluff #joel miller x you #the last of us #tlou #Renovations with Joel Miller

[sunghoons-mole]

it’s too late.

GENRE // ex!park sunghoon x afab!reader (ft. bf!jungwon)

WARNINGS // angst, heartbreaking, sunghoon is a complete ass (he would never, hes an angel) 

FROM THE AUTHOR // this is the first fic ive posted without proper capitalization. if that bothers you, i apologize. this fic was a shower thought, and i was just in a hurry to get it all out before it left my brain lol. enjoy !

the knock on your door was so sudden that you almost dropped the book you were reading. 

that’s how disasters begin, isn’t it? a knock on the door. you’d read enough books to know. 

setting the book on the coffee table, you walked towards the door slowly, sure it was nothing to be worried about. wiping your sweaty palms on your pants didn’t make the doorknob less slippery. 

when you saw sunghoon through the cracked door, you slammed it shut again, turning the lock and putting your back against it. but you were sure he could hear the steady drum of your heartbeat as panic washed over you. 

but not just panic. longing. 

“y/n, let me in.” his voice seemed to impale the wood that separated the two of you. you hated how quickly you listened to him.

closing the door and locking it behind him, you turn to face him, crossing your arms. you refused to speak first. 

“i know i suck.” he scratched his neck, looking at the floor. “i should have called. i-”

“you shouldn’t have left in the first place,” you yelled back, unable to stay quiet. your heart felt heavy, seeing him here for the first time in 8 months. it was normal for him to disappear on you without notice, for him to break your heart time and time again. but 8 months was the longest he’d ever left you. what in the hell was he doing back at your door? 

“y/n, love, can we just sit for a minut-”

“no. say what you need to say, so you can leave.” in a matter of minutes you had become too fired up to sit back down, and you weren’t in the mood to hear him out, not when you had spent 8 months putting yourself back together. 

and how dare he call you love again. 

“okay, okay.” you could tell he was slightly frightened by your raised voice. good. he deserved to be as scared as you were when you woke up to see that he was gone once again, wondering if he was safe. if he was okay. if he even cared about you at all. 

“i don’t know how to tell you. fuck,” he whispered, pacing the floor. you stepped away from the front door, clearing your throat and growing impatient. 

“i was afraid.” he stopped in place, looking at you. “of you. of... commitment.”

god, he sounded so typical. 

“and i let that drive me away. i thought if i just disappeared, it would hurt less for both of us.” 

if you had any doubts that sunghoon was sincere, they vanished at the sight of a tear rolling down his cheek. 

“and god, i was so fucking wrong.” his voice broke, and you felt your heart break along with it.

“everything i did, everywhere i went, i was kicking myself. because i wished you were there with me. doing it all with me. and i knew i fucked up.”

as compelled as you were to forgive him, you had realized a lot in the past 8 months. 

“you left several times before, hoon.” he winced at the nickname. “and yeah, you fucked up. every. single. time. you walked out that door.” your voice was growing hoarse from the yelling, and because you were on the verge of tears. how could he do this to you? how could he show up again, ruining all the progress you’d made on letting him go? 

“but i’m here now,” he whispered. “i’m telling you that i love you.” he steps forward, cupping your jaw with one hand. “please give me another chance.”

you pushed his chest away from you. “how do i know you won’t just up and leave again, park sunghoon?” you were full on crying then, unable to act tough and unbothered any longer. “you broke me. i spent so much time cleaning up the mess you made of me. and you come marching over here to make a mess of me again.” 

his expression was worried, sorrowful, pitiful. more tears fell as he took a step towards you again, tucking the hair behind your ear. “i won’t make that mess again, y/n. please trust me. i love you, so much. and i’m so fucking sorry it took me that long to come to terms with that.” 

just as the temptation to melt into his arms began, your phone rang from the couch. you jumped then, staring at sunghoon, your tear-soaked eyes meeting his tear-soaked ones. you backed toward the couch and picked up the phone. 

“hey,” you started, trying not to let it show that you had just been broken into pieces once more. you couldn’t let him know. 

but jungwon didn’t need a magnifying glass to find even the tiniest cracks in your composure. “baby, are you okay?” 

the worry in jungwon’s voice saved you, wrapping a bandage around your heart and knocking some sense into you. jungwon was love. jungwon was compassion. jungwon was everything sunghoon had been lacking for the past several years. you weren’t dumb enough to throw that to the wolves. 

“i’m okay, wonnie.” you looked up, locking eyes with sunghoon who was holding his breath. “i’ve just had a bit of a rough day.”

“i’m on my way home now. i was calling to see if you wanted me to grab us dinner.” you could hear the windshield wipers going through the phone. had it started to rain? “how do tacos sound, lovely?”

“sounds perfect, jungwon. thank you.” sunghoon lowered his eyes, staring at the floor and putting his hands in his pockets. 

and all of a sudden, it didn’t hurt so much anymore. the pain seemed to be numbed by some sort of metaphorical cold compress, and you didn’t feel so bad for sunghoon in that moment. he had dug his own grave on this one. it wasn’t your fault if he hated lying in it. 

“i’ll be home soon. cozy up with a blanket, okay? it’ll make you feel better. besides, the rain is going to cool down the air. i want you to be warm until i get there.” jungwon giggled into the speaker. “i have plenty of hugs to catch up on. should warm you up real nice, i hope.”

you couldn’t hide your smile even if you tried. wiping your cheeks, you hung up the phone and set it on the coffee table, next to your book. 

sunghoon walked closer to you. “i should be going...”

“yeah. that would probably be best.” you looked down, crossing your arms.

you were caught off guard by him pulling you into a hug. you were stiff for a moment, but the familiar feel of his arms around you caused your heart to betray you. hugging him back, you buried your face in his chest one last time.

“i’m sorry i couldn’t be who you needed me to be.” he whispered, resting his chin on your head. “if jungwon ever mistreats you, i’m here.” you felt a teardrop in your hair as his chest shook against your cheek. “one call, and i’m here.”

you pulled away, shaking your head. “he won’t.” you went to the door and held it open, taking one last look at your first love. there was pain in his eyes, beggin you to let him stay, and he was still crying. 

you couldn’t remember if you’d ever seen him cry at all. 

you managed to tear your eyes away from him. “it’s too late, hoon.”

he nodded, eyes never leaving the ground as he walked out the door. 

~

thanks for reading ! with love, sunghoons-mole

#enhypen #enhypen fic #enhypen sunghoon #park sunghoon #sunghoon #enhypen jungwon #yang jungwon #jungwon #sunghoon fic #jungwon fic

[strigital]

hey there, handsome beans. how are y'all?

bet y'all were wondering where tf Meg's gone again. to make long and complicated story short: a few physical illnesses followed by a severe mental crysis followed by more sickness followed by more mental problems. there was, among other things, an autistic breakdown which as we know doesn't go away easily. i will be severely honest with you guys. i do not know how i am still alive, given how horribly suicidal some of these days are. i suppose having pets does make a difference - no matter how selfish the suicidal ideation is it never manages to overpower the motherly need to love and protect these small creatures that so wholly depend on you not just for food, water and shelter, but for companionship as well… Belle, despite having only been out of shelter for like three moths, has been working her little butt off trying her damnest to convince me that i am needed: from following me everywhere like a shadow to crying like a child whenever there's a closed door between us… anyways, what was i talking about? ah yes… the horrific state both my mind a body ended up in. i honestly have no idea where this all came from. it was like one day it was sunny and calm and the next morning i woke up in the aftermath of a severe hurricane, ruin and corpses all around me. perhaps it was all brewing for a long time and i simply failed to notice the telltale signs. after all, there's no smoke without fire. there must've been a trigger. a final drop, a straw that broke the camel's back. sometimes it felt like a horror film, full of terrible thoughts and feelings that paralise you in a fetal position in the corner of your bed and keep you there hostage for days on end. some other days there would be flashes of unexplainable happiness that lasted barely a few hours and left you feeling panicked. most days there would be this prevailing feeling of numbness that wouldn't allow you to eat, let alone take care of daily chores. i've been having severe nightmares. i've plunged my body into a state of starvation. i've turned my home into a horror house of dirt and clutter. i'm failing behind in college and my boss at work is extremely unhappy with my productivity. i've lost ability to feel time: days muddle together, all i ever feel is a desire to sleep all the fucking time.

worst of all is that i cut contact with my closest people, among them - my dearly beloved husband, who still fights cancer on the other side of the planet, wondering where his useless wife gone. i've decided that it would be better for all of them, especially my hubby, to not see me in this condition. that the best i can do for them is to remove myself from their already busy lives and free them from any heartache i may cause, me being out of my mind and all. i did, however, used the very last of my strenght to reach out, to try and call for help… the suicide prevention line was a fucking joke that left me even more desperate than i was before i contacted them. i did, however, join a local autistic group on facebook and lurked there quietly, absorbing their experiences and sifting through for any sliver of hope. and i foud it. a doctor, who may just be the only specialist on adult autism in this entire country. getting an appointment with her was a small war in of itself. and she will cost me a lot of money… but as of right now i feel like she is the only person who can pull me off of the edge, before i tumble over and plummet into the abbyss. 29th of november i will sit my ass on a train and ride to another city to meet her. i pray to whatever will listen that she will take me seriously because neither my current psychiatrist nor my psychologist do. anyone i tried talking to these past two months on the matter of my crisis never offered me any help, only useless advice like "you should talk to a priest" or "have you tried reading a self-help book?". i'm drowning over here, karen, a priest and a book will only be of use during my funeral… the meds have become useless, even when i double or triple dosage.

most of all my heart aches for my husband. he tried calling me a few times yet i was too broken and lost in the dark to even have the courage to call back. i know i have no right to scream for help to a person who had been at war with a third stage cancer for almost three long difficult years. but i am teethering on the edge. i feel like that tiny hedghehog from an old soviet cartoon - lost in a thick fog, calling out for someone, anyone, looking for a way out. and the fact that no one understands or tries to understand hurts even more. the only one's who do are those anonymous people on facebook, fighting similar battles to mine. and when i read a letter from an anonymous mom who, like me, reached her breaking point and cut off any contact with her family in preparation for a final act and she only writes on facebook to find someone, anyone, to tell her what she truly needs and wants to hear in order to swerve off of this path of self-destruction i cannot help but feel an odd likeness to hope. i am not alone. but these people, those like me, simply do not exist within an arm's reach… god almighty, i so so hope the doctor will fix me. i am so tired waking up everyday with a desperate desire to die and walking all day with an invisible noose on my neck which only grows tighter every day.

i will go now and try to record a longwinded voice message for my husband… again. i will try my bestest to apologise, to try to explain, to ask for help. but how do you even begin to explain that your life so suddenly, so abruptly and seemingly our of nowhere became an open bleeding rotten sore, that only grows everyday, infecting more and more of your soul? i don't know. i never had this kind of crisis before in my life and, as if by some cruel divine joke, right now i have no family, no friends to turn to, beside my cat and my dog.

i will not ask of you to pray for me nor wish me luck. y'all have your own busy, messy lives. i only ask that you take care of yourself and your loved ones, so nothing like that ever happens to you or them. trust me when i say that no one will believe you, because this wound is invisible. they will tell you to feel grateful for having two arms and two legs and a roof over your head. meanwhile you will slowly rot away until one day they'll gasp: "how did this happen? they were such a happy person, nothing was wrong in their lives!" that's so fucking unfair, but it is the world we live in. and i know that oversharing like this on the internet is an incredibly stupid thing to do, but… i don't know. maybe another person with similar hardships in their life will read this and realise that they are not the black sheep of the human species and that shit like that happens to others too. i know this thought brings some very mild comfort to me, so maybe it will also brings some to them.

so stay strong, my beans. god knows i'm trying to. love you all and, hopefully, see you in the near future again with memes and stuff,

-- Meg K.

#personal #update #autism

[the-land-of-eternal-winter-novel]

Chapter 29 – The Sons and Fathers

Grigoriy was sitting on the throne, feeling a combination of loneliness, hopelessness and tiredness he wasn't able to describe in any way other than boredom. He was looking at the paintings all over the walls, seeing the past rulers and their families. On days such as these, he almost felt like turning himself in to the revolutionaries, but he remembered his family's legacy, which he feared would be ruined. The guards notified him multiple times before he heard them, learning he was having visitors.

Outside, Anatoliy and Akim had just arrived, debating how to approach coming inside and explaining themselves. It was decided that Akim should go first, Anatoliy trailing slightly behind, to watch his uncle's reaction. Grigoriy ordered the guards to open the doors, until Akim was able to make it to the throne room. He walked slowly into the large room, trying to avoid startling him. Grigoriy, still sitting, wanted to ask him who he was, but he couldn't be bothered to speak. However, the closer the young man came, the more familiar he looked to him. Grigoriy already guessed who he was, but didn't allow himself to believe it. However, his legs got the better of him, and he found himself walking towards his son.

"Akim?... This can't be real, I'm just dreaming..." he said, eyes wide, unable to smile yet, and still trembling.

"You're not; I came here, and I'm here to stay! I even brought someone else with me, look!"

Anatoliy took this as a sign that he should come, and he walked up to them, trying to greet his uncle and explain himself. Grigoriy, however, fainted, but the young men were able to catch him. They sprinkled him with cold water, and he woke up within minutes.

"No, this isn't real... Be gone, ghostly visions!... Oh, I'd rather die than become mad!..."

"You're not mad, neither are you dreaming." Akim tried to calm him down, also helping him back on his feet. "It's a long story, where can we even start...?"

"Tolya, but you killed yourself!" Grigoriy turned to his nephew, still in great shock.

"I may have tried to, but I survived!"

Grigoriy tightly squeezed his arm, as if expecting his fingers to pass through it.

"Radek found me in the snow and took me to the hospital. That's also where I met Akim."

"I tried to come home, but I got shipwrecked and ended up in that hospital. Isn't that quite a coincidence?"

"...and how come you decided to come back? After all these years, I thought you hated me!"

"I lost everything I had there, and I realised I've been running from my family, and from God, for way too long. I wanted to do the right thing, so I came to see you."

"Akim, I... the only thing I... seeing you one last time was the only thing I wanted from life anymore! I've been praying for this, but I didn't really believe... nor would I have believed to meet Tolya again... I read your letters; I never knew you suffered like this!"

Grigoriy grabbed both of them in his arms, bursting into tears, and the two inevitably followed suit. He held onto them as tightly as he was able to, almost fearing to let go.

"My dear boys... I thought I'd lost you forever!... Kimochka, my dear son!... I missed you everyday!..." he said, crying, and he kissed his forehead. "Tolyuchka, my dear nephew!... You were like a son to me!..." he also kissed his forehead, still crying. "Thank you so much, Lord!..." he looked upwards.

Later during that day, they sat down to eat, being able to explain everything that had happened in the meantime. Akim shared almost his entire life story, Anatoliy talked about the time in the hospital with Radek and Akim, and Grigoriy listened to it all with great interest.

"I can't believe you were even president once! That can't be allowed, can it?"

"It isn't, and I got impeached once they found out my real identity. My family and I were kicked out of the country, and my wife left me, maybe for good."

Grigoriy got a bitter taste in his mouth hearing this, but he was trying to give encouragement appropriate for the context.

"Well... I hope you manage to reconcile, though..."

"Me too... But until then, I got to meet you again!"

"...I remember when you were still a child..." he couldn't help but smile. "You've changed so much, I almost didn't recognise you."

"I could say the same about you."

"I've spent all these miserable years working, hoping it would make me feel achieved. I'm sorry for having been so cold to you when you were a child. I took you for granted."

"I was so angry at you when I was a teenager, then I wanted to forget both you and mom, then I started missing you. And it wasn't solely your fault. I could've come many years ago, but I was so entrenched in this fake identity I feared I would blow my cover if I so much as sent you a letter."

"Maybe we could make it up for these years."

"Of course, we have plenty of time for that! I'm going to stay here for a long time, if not permanently." Akim concluded, making his father smile.

"...and, Tolya, I'm sorry for having made you feel much more guilty than necessary. It's all my fault you got into this mess..." continued the old man, turning to Anatoliy.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, Dr. Arseniev did tell me that your dad was poisoned, but he didn't tell me who did it. I immediately jumped at the conclusion that it was King Vaidas, as he was my political rival at the time, and I saw fit to provoke the revolutionaries, thinking we'd get to conquer them altogether. I shouldn't have made you do the work for me."

"At the time, I would've been ready to kill anybody whom I thought guilty... But you knew Vaidas was innocent, didn't you?"

"Yes, I'm so sorry for lying to you, and to everybody else."

Anatoliy was conflicted, because, knowing himself, he probably would have still committed the vendetta, but it was also true that his uncle persuaded him to go through with the assassination. He did ultimately forgive him. Grigoriy was the happiest he'd ever been, together with his son and his nephew, but as he learned of Akim's life, the resemblance pained him, and he began to remember all of his guilt. However, he didn't let that bother him in that moment.

Radek was still with his mother, Kęstas and Elena, but he spent the majority of his time with his children, instead, also advising his brother to steer clear of petty arguments with their mother. The three children clung tightly to Radek, as they felt unsafe where they were. All of them were deeply bothered by having been separated from their parents, even though not both at once, and Petya was the most vocal about his concerns.

"Even grandma betrayed us!"

"Are you saying that because you heard me yesterday?"

"No, I knew the word long before that! And it's true! Everyone in our family tried to harm us, from uncle Tolya to uncle Grisha to grandma."

The younger two started crying upon hearing their brother's words.

"What happened? There, there." he tried to comfort them.

"I miss grandpa!"

"And the other grandpa!"

"I hate uncle Tolya!" said Petya.

The others didn't verbalise it that way, but they remembered how they distrusted even Ingrid.

"Don't say that!"

"Why?"

"We must forgive those who do us wrong."

"I don't want to!" he shouted, then started crying as well.

Radek was upset to see such reactions in his children, but he let them calm down, figuring out they were too confused about their emotions to act otherwise.

"I know it's very hard to forgive, but eventually, you must."

"I'll wait until he comes and says sorry!" he crossed his arms.

"He did apologise to me."

"And did you forgive him?"

"Yes, but not quite right away. I didn't say you had to do it right now, either."

Petya was confused as to how his father was able to tolerate somebody established as an enemy, but, after he felt less angry, he resolved that his father knew what he was doing.

"Daddy, what is going to happen to us now?" asked Katya.

"I don't know. Just stay close, alright?"

"We will..."

Radek was thinking about all of the possible scenarios and how he was to act in every case, especially so that he could protect the children. He didn't believe his mother, who seemed sure the revolutionaries wouldn't turn on her, so he started to make a defense plan for when they inevitably struck. When night came, he stayed with his children until they fell asleep.

"Daddy, what was your own dad like?" asked Volodya

"He was an officer in the military, and he fought in a war."

"I didn't know grandpa Vaidas did that."

"No, Vaidas was my step-father, meaning your grandma got married to him after my dad died in said war."

The children suddenly became very disturbed at the thought of a father dying, inevitably thinking about their own. Instead of urging him to take care of himself or even telling him not go take part in any war, they hugged him again, saying how much they loved him.

"I love you, too, my dear children. I'll be here for you for as long as I can."

Radek remembered that his own father also promised him he would always protect him, then he suddenly went missing, want was later found dead. Kissing his children goodnight, Radek now prayed only in thought that he wouldn't die so that children wouldn't go through the same hardships as him.

#the land of eternal winter #my novel #draft 1 #chapter 29

[artzee-bee]

Not going anywhere | Lucifer Morningstar x reader

Fandom: Lucifer

Request:” Hi i have request for you ,Lucifer and the reader have a big fight they are married, and this fight it's lucifer fault The reader leaves home and Lucifer decides to give her space After a few days, he goes to the reader and realizes that she has been missing for a few days,When the person behind all this claims that the reader is dead and gives them a her body . Everyone thinks that the reader is dead and Lucifer He gets depressed and thinks it's all his fault , and after a few days, the thieves release the singer and the reader goes to Lucifer.Lucifer first thinks it is an imagination and then apologizes to the reader Thank you so much”

Genre: Angst with happy ending

Warnings: kidnapping, death

~~~

Your intention had never been to start a fight. All you wanted an explanation (preferably one that also made sense) and an apology, but apparently that was too much to ask, because as soon as you voiced your opinion, Lucifer went up in flames

“Don’t start this again!”

“I dislike it just as much as you do but what I hate more is being cancelled on, AGAIN, through a text message no less!”

“It was an emergency!”

“It’s always an emergency Lucifer! It’s starting to sound a lot like work means more to you than I do!” “The detective needs me, damn it!” your husband yelled

“And she has you! Every day of every week! All I ask for is one date night and for the past month you’ve done nothing but avoid committing to one or backing out at the last second! I’m tired of being your second choice Lucifer! I’m your wife and you are my husband, I love you to the ends of the world, I just wish you'd say no to Decker from time to time...”

“I’m saving people’s lives Y/N. So if you’re not on your deathbed, other people are and they need me now!” as he said this, Lucifer walked right past you and into your bedroom, seemingly ignorant to the painful words he’d just said. You looked around the living room, vision blurry with tears, your chest heavy with anger and disgust. You rushed towards the elevator.

“When you find time in your busy schedule and feel like being my spouse again, let me know!” the elevator door closed before Lucifer could say anything

~~~

When Lucifer woke up the next morning to a cold and empty bed, he didn’t think much of it.Truthfully, he was still kind of pissed at the attitude you had given him a day before, so he got dressed as usual and went to the precinct, assuming you’ll be home by nightfall.

Except when he got home that night, he stopped by Lux first, which ended up like it always does: with him sucked into an endless cycle of booze and dancing, that lasted until well into the night. When he did enter the penthouse eventually, he found it empty. Exactly the way he had left it in the morning. Even the tie he had left on the floor, after deciding last minute that it didn’t go with his suit, was untouched. Now this was curious, but still, Lucifer felt like you must be playing hard to get. He sent you one text message, before going to bed

“Call me when you can!”

The day after that, he figured his part was done! By reaching out first, he had already made a big compromise, so now it was your turn! To reach out, come home! But that didn’t happen that day, or the day after that.

Three days after the text message,Lucifer was getting worried. He was looking at his phone every other minute. Always making sure he hadn’t accidently put it on silent or missed any texts. He sent more messages, telling you he was sorry and that he wanted you to come home. That he would listen and spend more time with you, promising luxurious dates and weekend trips, if only you forgave him. You didn’t even open the messages.

“Lucifer are you listening?” Decker was insanely annoyed at her partner’s lack of concentration

“Sorry detective. I’ve...I’ve got a lot on my mind”

“Well, better get it out of the way now, so that we can move on to our case!” she said, cleaning out her desk quickly, before resting back into her chair “Talk to me!”

“It’s Y/N. I’m worried about her!”

“Why?” “We...had a fight a couple days ago and she left. She hasn’t come back since”

“Have you heard from her at all?”

“No…” Lucifer said, embarrassed at his own lack of care for you. He should have called you earlier, reached out more! He should have tried harder!

“How long had she been missing for?”

“4...maybe 5 days…”

“Lucifer, are you sane? And you’re only telling me now?!” Chloe jumped from her seat, turning on her computer

“I thought she needed space! I thought she was avoiding me intentionally cause she was angry! I didn’t know…” Lucifer choked back a sob, not wanting to break down in tears in the middle of the precinct

“Lucifer!” Chloe caught hold of his hand “I’m gonna find her! I promise you!” A few days later, she did. Well, more like Y/n came to her, in the shape of a pretty little gift box left on Decker's doorstep.

“A lil too late on your case detective” read the note attached to it. 

Inside were Y/N’s clothes, all of them stained with dark, dried blood. Y/N was declared dead that day and the case was closed. At her funeral, only her closests friends were present. Lucifer wanted it to be as intimate as possible.

That day was also the first time anyone had seen Lucifer, since the news. His eyes were bloodshot and the dark circles under his eyes almost matched the black suit he was wearing. Throughout the ceremony he kept twisting his wedding band, a habit he’d picked up on since you went missing. He chose not to do a speech, but once the crowd disappeared, and he was left face to face with your grave, he pulled out a little piece of paper from his pocket and sat down on the grass.

“In hell, everyone feared me. There, I was nothing but another server of the universe, ruling over an empire I never really wanted, because I never had a choice. So eventually I left, thinking anywhere will be better than what I had, and I came to earth.

I ran into you about 2 weeks later, before I really even knew how to behave myself. Before I knew anything about who I really was besides ‘the devil’. I longed to know, grow and discovers different sides of me, where I could be something new, and you gave it to me. You made me who I never thought I could possibly be. You made me a lover. I never thought of myself as capable to love anyone, in any degree, but your light shone everywhere you went and your kindness touched me and everyone around you. It became impossible to not get infatuated with your person. I allowed you to see and feel around every dark corner of my soul and being and every time I thought it was the end. Everytime I would take in your touch as if it was the last, I would prepare myself for abandonment, but it never came. Through everything you stood by my side and when I felt my darkest, you gave me a fistful of your light and that was enough to keep me going. You married a broken man and called him perfect, despite everyone telling you how much of a foul you were. Even then, you shooed them away. Even then you chose me. I wasn’t worthy of your love or your trust and our last night together proved it.

You’re not here anymore to hear my apologies and I’ll never forgive myself for it. You’ve gone now somewhere I can not follow, but I know you are well taken care of there. I hope, someway, somehow, you’ll hear these words: I am sorry. I loved you with my entire soul. Not listening to you was the biggest mistake of my life and I’ll never forgive myself. I choose however, to remember you as you were, because I know that’s what you’d want. I’ll remember you and your laugh.I’ll remember our date nights and shopping sprees. Nights in Lux or on the penthouse balcony. I’ll remember all the meals you prepared for me and the flirtatious remarks you used to make, because you thought they were so silly. I’ll remember the little frown on your face whenever you worked on an important project for work and I’ll remember every evening walk around the block you’d make me accompany you on. I know I always complained about them, but they were always fun. Everything I ever did with you was always fun.

I loved you. I still do. You are my everything Y/N. Thank you for devoting yourself to me in all the ways that you did. I’ll forever live on in my heart.“

~~~

It had been months since your disappearance. After all this time, you finally managed to escape your kidnappers and report them to the New York police station, since that’s where you had been held hostage for so long. As soon as the paperwork was done and you were sure that the people who ruined you were getting the punishment they deserved, you jumped on a train and headed straight back home. Straight to Lucifer.

Lux looked exactly the same as you had left it. You were washed over by a wave of comfort that almost brought you to tears. Home. You never thought you’d get to step in here again. Overwhelmed, you took a seat on one of the couches, allowing your head to rest back on it, as you took in every detail of your surroundings: the feel of the leather on your fingertips, the cool breeze of the air conditioning, the warm lights. Everything was still here.

“Y/N?” you jumped at the sound

“Hi love…” your voice broke as you said those words. Words you never thought you would be able to mutter again. The sight of your husband, messy as he was, made you weak in the knees. He was standing at the top of the staircase, dressed in nothing but his robe, tied carelessly around his waist. He had probably just woken up. You wanted to say something again, but before you could, he laughed

“Nope” he said simply, before making his way down the stairs and to the bar “I’m not doing this. Not today, not ever!” Lucifer filled his glass to the top with bourbon, before turning around and trying to leave back to where he came from

“Lucifer, it's me!”

“Sure you are, except you’re not real! Nice of dad, taking my ability to stay endlessly sober, getting me drunk, forcing visions of my dead wife onto me to teach me another lesson about managing my emotions. Real clever, except this is too much! So I’m going to enter that elevator and I expect to never have to see you again, hum? Right, well, au revoir now!” he continued on his way, but before he could get far, you were clutching on the silk tie of his robe. Lucifer felt the tug around his waist and turned around slowly to look at you, this time a little more unsure. As if he was trying to figure you out

“Lucifer, I’m Y/N. I escaped”

“Escaped? But that’s impossible, she died! I saw it-”

“What you saw was a bloody shirt!” he looked up to meet your gaze, tears already forming “They lied to you Lucifer”

Finally, it seemed like he had connected all of the pieces of the puzzle. The glass of alcohol fell to the ground and your husband wrapped you in a big hug for the first time in months. He nuzzled his head in your hair and took in your scent, your figure, your warmth. Hell, you were even more perfect that he remembered! Silent tears fell down both of your cheeks as you collapsed to the ground, still holding onto each other for dear life

“I’m so sorry” Lucifer sobbed in your hair “I’m so so sorry”

“It wasn’t your fault Luci”

“If I hadn’t been a jerk you wouldn’t have left! If I would have simply listened to you, they wouldn’t have gotten to you! You would’ve stayed here, where you belong! You would have stayed with me but instead I was too busy with my stupid job and the stupid cases and I’m sorry! I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry” he continued crying on your shoulder as you rubbed small circles on his back

“I’m here now my love” you whispered, kissing his cheek “And I’m not going anywhere”

#lucifer #lucifer netflix #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer morningstar imagine #lucifer morningstar angst #lucifer morningstar

[kass-storycorner]

I’ve been thinking a lot about the Hu Tao and Chongyun storyquests the past days. Both deal with the afterlife (well the border between life and death so far) and ghosts. We know both are canon in Genshin, they exist for this world. Now what I’ve been thinking a lot about is … how much angst can I write with that in mind? I always see a lot of these how the characters would react to your death but… yeah, have fun with this. Or not.

The ghost of you

Prompt: You died and the characters are faced with the literal ghost of you.

Genre: Angst, Hurt, no comfort (especially for Xiao)

Characters: Zhongli, Xiao,

Format: text

Word count: 1714

This is not proof-read or anything, I just wanted to get that idea out of my head. I also really want to write this idea out for other characters, so maybe I'll share a part 2 in the future. and yes the title might be a mcr reference and i might have two other fics in my drafts named after mcr songsi had a rough week okay

Zhongli:

He loved you. With all his heart, with every fibre of his being, he loved you so much. Zhongli always knew that his decision to live a life among mortals would cost a price, but in his mind, it was paid with his Gnosis all those years ago. It was not until the first of his mortal friends started to die that Zhongli was reminded of how fragile humans were. Of course, he was aware to a certain degree that he would outlive his friends and even you, he just never considered how quickly a human life was lived. You both had spent an entire life together, and while Zhonglis body did not biologically age, he is able to change his form to his liking - so when you grew old and grey so did he. Most people in Liyue would see the two of take your stroll around the city, holding hands and they were enamoured by the way you still looked at each other, just like a newlywed couple. But you grew older each day until one day, on one of your walks through the city, your collapsed. Zhongli was quick to catch you and the people around rushed towards the two, helping Zhongli getting you to a doctor. However, what was a doctor to do, than to tell Zhongli that your body is giving up? The doctor nor Zhongli can do anything against the flow of time, though Zhongli wished he could. He was not ready to let you go, he was not ready for you to onyl life in his memories until the erosion of the earth will erease you from them.

You layed in the hospital bed, Zhongli right next to you never letting go of your hand, when you took your last breath. He sat next to you for a while, not saying a word, tears running down his face until he heard your voice.

"It's okay," there you stood on the other side of the bed, your dead body between the two of you. In all the years Zhongli lived he had seen more than a few ghosts and he was aware of the human afterlife - though seeing your ghost wasn't something he anticipated. "You're dead", Zhongli said quietly, tears still spilling from his eyes. "I know, love. I know. And I wish I could've stayed with you just a bit longer, I really do. But it's time. You gave me such a wonderful life; we spend so many years together and I am so thankful for it Zhongli. For all the stories you told me, for all the sleepless nights we spend together, for all the memories we made. I loved it. I love you." Zhongli still hadn't let go of your hand, still afraid of letting you go, even though the mind he loved was standing so close to him. "Love," he started, his voice heavy with grief. "I have so many more stories to tell you. Will you stay, just for a while longer?"

At that you had to laugh a bit and oh, how much he already missed your laugh. He just heard it a few hours ago, when you were still alive, but hearing it now just felt so painful. "Zhongli, even 10 lifetimes wouldn't be enough to be able to listen to all of your stories. But I'm so sorry to disappoint you, you know I can't stay."

He knew this just too well. Not only as someone who worked for decades as a consultant of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor in Liyue, but also as the former Geo-Archon he knew it was better for you to go. It pained him that he could never follow you into the afterlife that was awaiting you, even Zhongli didn't know what awaits you behind the border between life and death. "Then," Zhongli began, standing up and letting go of your cold hand, "let me accompany you."

Xiao:

Continuation for the Xiao one

Xiao refused to go even near the place you died for decades. The day he lost you was still so fresh in his memories, it pained him even more than his karmic debt to think about it. He always told you, when you were still by his side, that when you were in trouble, in danger, to always call his name. You did. You always did and he would be by your side, protecting you from what would’ve harmed you. The only time you refused to call his name in time was the day you died, and all Xiao could do was blame himself. You were visiting at the Inn earlier that day, standing next to him on the balcony talking about something he doesn’t even remember. What he remembers how happy you were, how enthusiastic you talked about it, whatever it was. Somehow though the conversation shifted, and you both ended up fighting – the reason for it was so stupid and it was all his fault. He was just in a bad mood that day and not even your warm presence were able to change it, so he let it out on you. Trying to push you away, again. Xiao cursed himself for how often he did that, how often he would hide how much he loved you, how much he cared for you, behind a mean exterior that only caused you pain. You knew what he was doing and that day, you just had enough. “Stop trying to push me away, Xiao!”, you shouted at him, tears already filling your eyes. You tried to reach for him, but he pulled away. Keeping you at a distance, again. “And you just stop talking, it’s exhausting to hear your voice.” Xiao already hated himself immediately after he said it, but looking back now, knowing what his words caused… it drove him close to madness. “Fine,” you replied, and he could her how much his words hurt you, “then you’ll never hear it again.” With that you left him. He tried to distract himself from the guilt he felt after your fight with his work, slashing through the enemies, spoiling the earth of Liyue with more blood. For nearly a month he didn’t hear you call him, and he was too scared to seek you out. Scared that you wouldn’t want to see him, scared that he ruined it all. When you finally called for him, when he finally heard you say his name – he hoped it was a chance for him to make it up to you. Xiao was not prepared to find your lifeless body, realising that you called his name with your very last breath. It send him into a blind rage, killing the enemies around him that were the cause for your death. When there was nothing left to kill he collapsed next to your corpse, tears spilling from his eyes, chanting your name over and over like a prayer. Asking himself why you hadn’t called him sooner to only remember what he said weeks prior. It was his fault. He couldn’t help it but to blame himself for your death. If he hadn’t said those words, if he hadn’t continuously tried to push you away… you were right. Xiao will never hear your voice again.

He avoided to go even near the place you died. If he hadn’t done that, if he had visited at least once, he would’ve seen your ghost, wandering aimlessly around. At first you were just confused, what had just happened? The last thing you remembered is that you called for Xiao and now? Now you stood in the middle of a forest, no Xiao in sight but also the enemies who cornered you just now were also gone. For how long you wandered around, confused and not sure what had happened you didn’t know. It scared you. You screamed his name, over and over again but you couldn’t hear your own voice. You just couldn’t make a sound.

He didn’t mean to come across that place again. Xiao learned to live with the guilt and grief he felt, just as he had to learn to live with his karmic debt. Still, it hurts more than he likes to admit. So when he stumbled upon the place he lost you all those years ago, he asked himself how he ended up here again. Something was telling him he should come here, but he tried to ignore that voice, that calling. But when he saw your ghostly figure between the trees of the forest, it used to be a plain field when you had died, he froze. Was it really you? “(Y/N)?”, he called out to you. Oh, how long he hadn’t said your name. It felt foreign, but also so familiar at the same time. But you didn’t hear nor see him, you were too lost after years of roaming the fields that grew to a forest – not being able to understand that time passed, that you were dead. Xiao came closer to your ghost and saw how you screamed something, over and over. His name. It was his name. “(Y/N) it’s me, I’m here. Please, I’m here, it’s okay”, his voice was strained and when your face met his – Xiao noticed how you didn’t look at him. You looked right through him, he noticed now how he couldn’t reach you with his words nor his presences. He tried to grab you, but his hand only touched the air. If he could at least hear you call his name. Xiao felt how his tears ran down his face, his heart shattering again in thousand pieces. Why hadn’t he noticed it earlier how you roamed the earth, lost and scared. He saw it in your face. Why didn’t he come here earlier? It pained him to know that you hadn’t found your peace. Xiao went down on his knees, face buried in his hands. The last time he felt so helpless was when he found your dead body, unable to help you. And now? Now it happened again, he had no idea what he could do to help you, to make you see him. From that day on Xiao spend most of his time watching over your ghost, hoping that one day he’ll hear you call out to him again.

#genshin impact #genshin impact x reader #zhongli x reader #xiao x reader #angst #hurt #no comfort #gn!reader #zhongli #xiao #genshin #genshin impact angst #gensin impact hurt #xiao genshin impact #zhongli genshin impact #fan fiction #genshin impact fan fiction #genshin fan fic #writing #genshin writing #somewhere in the zhongli part i wanted to put a sentence like that was the day zhongli died and morax had to built himself a new life #or something liek that #and i really like the line i have in my head but it just did not fit with it #also i wnated to keep this short so eh

[modx-reborn]

The first prefromance

Something I spoke of in a discord I'm in.

So here have Simpbur and CamGirl/Camboy reader doing a show with them after working his way into their close circle.

(Yes this plays off of the two cam asks I have gotten recently)

Also please know that real cam girls/boys aren't actually going to do this, this is purely fictional in its makeup.

SMUT UNDERCUT! MINOR DNI!

"That's it j-just like that, all the way like you should be taking me. S-shouldn't be here fucking my hand w-when I could be fucking you, such a pretty thing so good for me, but such a slut t-to let others watch you like this..."

That was the last thing he had said to you on your last private call, since then he had wormed his way further and further into your shows and even into a bit of your personal life, or well your on-screen personal life, as he had the phone number you kept aside for work, from your days as a more in-person performer.

And boy did he ever make use of the number, sending you little messages and photos whenever the thought struck him, peppering you in small doses of affection and savouring the way you called him sometimes when you skipped a stream, offering him to listen to you get off instead letting him hear when you spoke about the toy he had sent you. Sometimes even getting him to call and ask for you to listen to him, getting you to mutter things to him and work him that little bit closer to his end.

But now what you're calling for may just break your dear simp, having had all the fun you could with the silicon imitation he had made for you, that now your mind was thinking about how he would feel rather than the toy. 'S-shouldn't be here fucking my hand w-when I could be fucking you' his own words playing on repeat in your head after you close down your last stream, sending little thank yous to the top donators before moving to the call ping that was coming through.

It was him. Perfect.

"Ahh, there he is, my pretty top boy Simpbur!"

"That was quite the s-show, but what did you mean by you're w-working on something big with someone else?"

"Well, that's good that you asked my dear. You are always so good for me, sending those little messages and all those donations, I was thinking you may want to help me with the next stream..."

"Y-you want me to-"

"Mmhmm, didn't you say yourself that it should be you fucking me, or was it that you should be here in me rather than fucking your hand?"

It's easy to finish your sentence with a tilt of your head, tapping one of your fingers against your bottom lip as if you were actually trying to remember when truly you were just teasing the curly-haired boy staring at you wide-eyed through your screen.

"I. Yes. I-I mean I would love to if you want me to..."

With his agreement the rest of the call was spent hashing out the rough details and leaving him open to suggest what he wanted to do for the show, leaving him with a wink and a reminder to 'Keep it simple' before you logged out and started to pack up and clean down the space you had been working in.

There would be a few weeks between your last show and the next one, having all the platforms you used teasing the next stream with images of the silicone toy being front and centre in all the images, a tease for all your viewers but a reminder for your dear simpbur that he would be more real in your world in a few days. Even when he made up his mind on what he wanted it was still so very hard for him to not scroll back through the recorded calls and streams, take himself in hand and work through the building need.

But he managed to keep his hands off, having worked himself up even before the actual day of the stream.

When you call him, he picks up on the first ring as always chipper and shaky in the same breath as he says your stage name.

"There's my good boy! You ready for tomorrow? Your first time in the red light after all, just want to make sure you're still down and want to do this."

"I-I am. I'm good and... and ready for tomorrow."

With a laugh and a quick goodbye, you hang up, heading off to the regular place you booked for longer shows needing to set up lights and the cams now, otherwise you would likely not have time when your co-star finally made his way to you. And how right you were, the moment the time for the stream rolled around he was there at your door, hands fiddling with the bottom of his button-up, mask and beanie on as if you hadn't seen his face a million times before.

Welcoming him in is easy, but getting him to calm down just enough to have him read back what the two of you had planned took slightly longer. You had him keep his mask and beanie on, using them as a way to keep him from having his real-world life ruined from doing this one little show with you, the suggestion also seems to put some of his nerves to rest.

When the cameras do start rolling, the stream on a start-up timer for switching on to a live stage, your chat on a large screen hanging over your laptop that was actually hosting the show, messages flying past as people are lured in at the promise of a different kind of show and the tagline mentioning a guest star. When the cam starts showing the room you're seated on Simpburs lap, thighs spread wide over his with his hands holding you close while you do your intro, his masked face pressed into your shoulder as he mutters something under his breath.

Your form rocking back into him once you're were done, slipping a hand under his beanie and tangling in his curls, making him groan just loud enough that one of the many mics would be able to hear him, laughing and cooing at him as you reach down with your free hand to wrap around his cock, slowly running your fingers across the heated flesh.

"You'll be good for me won't you? So pretty and brave being here on cam with me, getting a treat that so many would die for..."

His voice falters when you shift your grip, tugging on his hair just as you start to actually move your hand to jerk him off, slipping your hand out of his hair you reach for a little remote, making the camera zoom in as you close your thighs around him, burying his cock between your thighs. Cooing at him once again as his hands are braced on your hips, using this to bounce you on him, head tilted back and panting as he fucks your thighs.

The exposed skin of his neck calling for you to leave a few marks across, a little gift for him to remember this day by, or well more than the stream recording of course, pink and purple marks blooming across his neck as he changes the pace moving you more and more until you can feel him throbbing between your thighs.

"Oh, sweet thing you're cumming already? Are my thighs that good? Can't even hold on for the main performance, or are you that eager for more that you would cum now and still keep going? Hmm, what is it, pretty boy?"

The only answer you receive is a deep groan and the warm feeling of his cum seeping from between your thighs, spreading your legs to show off the mess to your cam, letting everyone who was watching see the mess that he had made. Reading your chat gave you a wonderful idea, they wanted more and you wanted to see just how far you could push your dear simp till he broke and lived up to his wants to actually fuck you.

Flicking across the remote once again the camera angle changes, showing a side view of the bed perfect for what you were planning to do, the angle giving your audience the best show as you move off his lap and kneel on the floor. Holding his cock with one hand as you lean forward to lick a stripe up his shaft, cleaning his mess off with your mouth, taking him fully once most of him was clean looking up at him through your lashes once you have taken him into your throat.

Watching how his eyes go wide, hands shaking when they reach for your head, his eyes flicking up to the chat screen reading over some of the words telling him to fuck your face, to make you cry and drool all over him, and other wanting to be where he was, whining over text that they should have been the one there with you. The majority calling for him to do something, building a need to move in him, slowly he is moving his hips, still sensitive after having cum not moments before but the feeling of your mouth wrapped around him was spurring him on.

Before long his hips are moving properly, holding your head steady as he fucks your mouth watching how you look up at him every time he pushes into your throat, tears building and falling with how harsh some of his thrusts are, but the image just makes him groan. Throwing his head back once again as he works himself back up, trying to hold out and enjoy this feeling for a little while longer, only you had other plans pulling away panting as you take in the way he looks.

Flicking your hands cross the remote once again to switch cameras for the final time settling on one that would let your audience watch how good your dear simp was for you, let them watch how full he makes you feel and how pretty he looks when he cums, when he finally gets what he wanted.

"You ready pretty boy, ready to finally get what you want? What you told me about on all your calls? Take you all the way like I should be taking you?"

"P-please, fuck just please le-let me fuck you..."

In his rush to reach for you, his beanie had come off, brown curls falling out in a mess that you tried to cover again only to have your hands smacked away in favour of him pulling you up onto the bed with him. Throwing your thighs over his own reaching for the bottle of lube you had left waiting to be used, coating his fingers before pressing them into you working you open with one hand as the other is pressed to your shoulder keeping you from moving away from his probing fingers.

"G-God look at you, do-don't even need to work my way up to two fingers, already so r-ready for them... Ready for me."

To quick are his fingers gone replaced by the head of his cock, easing his way in as he moans, hands grabbing your hips to steady himself as he finally gets to feel what it's like to be buried in you just like his toy replica had been so many times before. There is little time between him being fully hilted in you and him starting to move, his hands moving from your hips to under your thighs ignoring the sticky cum still staining them, pushing them back and using the new angle to fuck into you as hard as he liked.

Wanting to have you drooling into the mattress and calling his name, making you remember him and him alone so that if you ever did another show like this, it would be his number you called. That if he did this good enough, fucked you good enough that it wouldn't be on camera the next time he got to fuck you, it would be at your home in your bed, him calling your real name not this stage name you work under.

He comes back from his thoughts when your voice cuts through them, high pitched and whining for him to let you cum, for him to keep going to let you have what you had given him earlier, to feel him cum in you this time.

"F-fuck you w-want me to cum in you? P-paint your inside with me..."

The chat if either of you could see it was still it was running a mile a minute, calling for him to do it, to cum and let them see how it will drip out of you. Others call for him to deny you, keep you begging for your release while he took his own, but neither of you could see those words and so your ends draw near.

"T-that's it, god feels so. So good around me, j-just like I thought you would..."

The rough pace he set becomes almost brutal when he cums, there will be bruises in the shape of his hands come the next few days but that thought paired with the sight of your dear simp losing himself in you was what tipped you over.

The end of the stream was much like the beginning, albeit with a mess of brown curls keeping the camera from seeing how the mask had been pulled down and soft kisses were being placed along your shoulders, the moment you had given the final thanks and turned off all the gear the hands that were wrapped around your waist were pulling you back onto the bed, keeping you as close as possible.

After all the pressure of performing for people falls away, it's easy to give comfort to the man curled around you, wanting him to be comfortable with what you had just done. Once again tangling your hands in his hair only this time to give comfort rather than tease, cooing soft praise until the grip around you eases slightly.

"You did so well, such a good boy for me..."

#c: simpbur #dsmp smut #mcyt smut #k: praise #k: exhibitionism #k: teasing #k: face fucking #k: overstim #k: thigh fucking #cw: sex work #mxad

[kingsuckjin]

Golden- JJK

💛 Pairing: (almost entirely)Jungkook x reader, (basically none)Seokjin x reader

💛 Rating: 18+

💛 Genre: friends to lovers but like fluffy but also like very sad.

💛 Summary: After see your boyfriend Jin cheating on you at a bar and realizing your shared friends have been working together to hide it from you, you storm off into the parking lot to cry. Jungkook sees you out there and tells you the truth about everything, or what he wants you to believe is the truth.

💛 Words: almost 16k

💛 Warnings: CHEATING!!! “only one-bed” cliché but I love it, drinking, oral sex(m&f), protected sex and unprotected sex, dirty talk, overestimation, vaginal fingering, love kink?, too much smut, uhhh Jungkook is a bit of a stalker.

💛 Note: listen, I just wanted an excuse to write a gratuitous amount of Jungkook fluff and smut and I also love hurting. I thought I should throw in, these two characters are not actually in love, there are reasons it moves so fast, but it's not love.

❤ also a very big thank you to @btsaudge​ who beta read this whole thing for me, she’s not only a god tier beta reader but a god tier writer too ❤

“Where are you?” Jin was supposed to be home an hour ago. He had been doing this off and on for the past few months. You’d be lying if you hadn't wondered if things were beginning to fall apart later. You knew Jin would never do anything he wasn’t supposed to, especially not with the other guys there. You knew he was probably just having fun and part of you felt awful for wanting to keep tabs on him, you didn’t want to ruin his time by pestering him the whole time.

You paced as you waited for a reply but none came.

“Is Jin okay?” You sent to Namjoon now and he replied pretty quickly.

“Yeah, I’ve got an eye on him. We’re just over here at Gold’s bar telling old stories.” 

“Thank you.” You replied. You knew Jin could be a handful after having too many drinks but entrusted them with him.

You tried to sit back down and open your laptop up only to just blankly gaze at the screen. You were bored. Writer's block had hit you hard and you just didn’t feel like writing right now. You missed Jin tonight. You thought about the trip you had saved up for with the money from your last book. Sleepless hours were poured into making that book special all because you and Jin had shared a dream of vacationing in Hawaii together. All of your money went to it, every cent besides the shared rent, you wanted to surprise him and you just couldn’t find the right time to do it. He was a lawyer, not the best yet, so he had many sleepless hours too. You both deserved this trip.

You wondered for a moment if you dressed up and showed up if it would make him happy, especially if you finally told him about the trip tonight. You figured if you waited until he got home he would just pass right out and you wouldn’t get the chance. Again, you didn’t want to bother him with his friends, but then again he had spent many nights with them drinking and you were sure there were more to come, one night of you showing up couldn’t hurt.

You closed your laptop and went to your closet to find the black dress he loved so much on you, you only got it out for special occasions, and one of these days you planned on wearing it when he proposed. You knew him proposing was coming, he had been talking about it here and there lately “After we’re married…” or “when I make you my wife…” this was how life was supposed to go and you thought you couldn’t have picked a more relaxed person to share life with and you did your best to match his laid back attitude.

You got an Uber to Gold’s bar, it wasn’t a long ride, just long enough to make you further worry about ruining his time tonight. 

The first person you saw was Taehyung sitting at the bar with a pretty lady, obviously flirting like the ladies man he was. 

You tapped him on the shoulder and when he turned he seemed surprised to see you for a moment.

“Where’s Jin?” You asked over the music that was playing slightly too loud and it just wasn’t your taste in music anyway.

“I saw him over there.” He pointed to a corner of the building, and you saw him alright. You saw past the people and even passed the girl pressed into him, both leaned on the wall. 

“What are you doing here?” Came another voice.

You looked away from the scene and at Yoongi. Your eyes felt wide and your mouth fluttered open and closed. You didn’t know what to say or to think, or what was happening. Were you tired? Were you seeing things? Had your sweet and kind boyfriend just been making out with another woman with all of his and your friends here to witness it? You were confused? Did they all know something you didn’t?

You turned back around, afraid you would see the scene again, but you didn’t. There was no one against the wall. The place was dim, maybe you had just thought it was Jin.

“Want a drink?” Yoongi offered.

All you could do was just nod. 

Your eyes kept scanning the faces of people to find Jin, you were so lost and set on finding him that you were surprised to see the shot in front of your face Yoongi had gotten for you. You took it, you had no idea what it was even as it burned your throat.

“Looking for Jin huh?” Yoongi asked and sat down at one of the stools at the bar before patting the seat next to him.

“Well he’ll find us, I think he’s around here with Namjoon somewhere, might’ve gone to throw up.” 

“Yeah.” You replied but still felt nervous. Another shot was brought to both you and Yoongi.

“Was-was he pretty drunk when you saw him last?” You asked.

“He always gets pretty plastered, you know that.” 

“Sweetie!!!!” It was his voice.

You turned in the stool to see a smiling Jin coming in your direction, arms stretched wide. “What are you doing here?” He seemed happy and pretty drunk and he leaned over, wrapped his arms around you, and placed his cheek on your head. 

You felt relieved he wasn’t upset you were there.

“I’ve missed you all night.” He kissed the top of your head.

“God, you’re loud when you’re drunk,” Yoongi muttered to him.

When he released your smile that had grown from his embrace and hug faltered.

There was red lipstick on his neck.

“Jin what happened?” You asked, your hands had become sweaty as the scene you had witnessed earlier flashed through your mind.

“What do you mean?” He still wore a big smile.

“Jin, you have lipstick-“ you couldn’t finish your sentence. You turned to Yoongi just to make sure you weren’t going crazy and he had turned back away to face the bar.

You could feel your pulse thud hard as your brain further tried to rationalize it but to no avail. He must’ve caught on because he wiped at the place on his neck where your gaze was fixed. Your eyes flickered back to his nervous-looking brown eyes that were always so full of joy and laughter, the ones that always felt like home to you. Everything about this situation felt so wrong like a nightmare, you felt sick. This couldn’t be your Jin, it wasn’t your Jin, it was some strange cold stranger pretending to be him, but the more you looked at him the more you realized you were wrong. You felt tears well in your eyes and knew your strong front was beginning to dissolve and break apart like paper in water. 

That was it.

You took off for the door, you looked back and saw Jin trying to stumble after you, but Taehyung had stopped him.

You were left in tears in the parking lot, you felt your phone go off in your hand but your brain was in too much of an anger and hurt haze to care. You were looking for a place to break down, anywhere, but you sure as hell weren’t planning on going back in there. Your whole relationship with Jin was flashing through your mind and it felt like your heart had been burned, burned with the image of him and someone else the way her lipstick has been burned onto his neck.

You began to sob as you walked around parked cars. You were caring less and less who saw you break down. You felt so alone and exposed especially when a man sitting on the hood of his car began to stare.

“Y/n?” The voice questioned. Through your tear-blurred vision, you could see the screen of his phone light up his shocked-looking face.

Jungkook.

“How’d you get here so fast? I just-“ he stood from his seat on his car hood.

“Seokjin cheated on me.” You sobbed in the ugliest crying voice you had ever heard come from yourself.

Your fists grabbed the material of his jacket and you hurried your face in its collar.

His hands went to the middle of your back and hugged you silently for a moment. It just felt so good to have someone comfort you when everyone else seemed not to care or ignore you altogether. Even if it was awkward Jungkook.

You recalled the time where he once showed up at your University and just wanted to hang out for seemingly no reason. The whole two hours he was with you, he stayed silent. You thought he had wanted to visit you because you were friends but it left you wondering if he was ju9st trying to kill time or something. You also remember Jin not being too happy about it when you told him, maybe Jin wasn't too understanding back then.

“He was kissing someone else and I-I-“ you trailed off into a series of gaspy hiccups.

“I know.” He sighed.

“What?” You took a step back but still didn’t release him.

“Your phone. Check your phone.” He instructed.

You unlocked it to see a lengthy text from him. It was hard to read it and stay focused, you were shivering out of school or the chill in the air from this dress. You skimmed it but you shook worse the more you stood there. Attached were two pictures of Jin and the woman kissing in the same way and position that you had seen them.

You looked up at Jungkook with tears streaming down your cheeks, your lip quivered, your body shivered and he looked down at you with sorrow knitted into his furrowed brows.

“I’m sorry. They had always told me not to say anything, that it wasn’t my business, that I’d make you both unhappy if I-“ 

Your teeth were still chattering as you looked up at him.

He took his coat off silently before draping it around your shoulders. You fed your arms through the armholes that were way too big on you.

“Come on, let’s get you… let’s get you warm.” He went around to the passenger’s side and opened his car door. You didn’t resist, at least you could break down somewhere private.

You held your head in your hands as you sobbed over the sound of the engine and heat warming the car. He sat there quietly, not saying anything at all, but you didn’t blame him for it, he had always been awkward with people, especially you, but at least he seemed to care more than anyone else tonight.

You cried until only your hiccups remained. Your head rested against the headrest as you looked out the windshield at the night sky, it was starless.

“You- you uh wouldn’t want to go home would you.” It was a statement, he knew you wouldn’t. “Is there- somewhere I can take you? You could come with me… if you want.” 

“I don’t know, I don’t know if I want to be anywhere, but I can’t go home.” You stated knowing you weren’t making complete sense.

“We don’t have to go to my house just yet, we can do anything you want… but I do understand if you want to be somewhere where you can just be sad.”

“I don’t want to be sad.” You sniffled once more and wiped at your face “I don’t want to be anywhere sad. I wanted to have fun…”

“I know somewhere we can have fun.” 

Before you could answer he was pulling out of the parking lot.

It was quiet for a while as you just looked out the window.

“I know what it’s like you know.”

You turned to look at his face as he drove, lights every so often passing over his face.

“You’ve been cheated on too.” It wasn’t a question so much as a sad statement that came from your mouth. 

“That’s what made me want you to know so badly. It tore my heart out and sometimes I wish …I never would’ve found out, it hurt. I know it hurts.”

“I’m so sorry Jungkook.” You whispered. Sometimes he was weird, but you knew he had always had a good heart. 

“Sometimes things like that just happen, it doesn’t make it hurt less, but it does help to know you’re not alone… that and getting shit-faced.” He joked making you let out an amused puff of breath as you felt yourself smile just a little.

“Are we going somewhere with alcohol?” You asked.

“Of course. It’s on the house tonight.”

“You’re a good one Jungkook.” You replied.

You looked up at the big neon bowling ball and pins at the top of the building as you sat in the parked car.

“Bowling?” You asked and looked down at your dress. He was such a weird person.

“Just trust me.” 

So you did trust him, after all, it was better than being at home alone or worse, at home with Jin.

When you walked into the bowling alley it was dark, but there were laser lights and strobes and glowing lights and music played loudly but not as near as deafening as it did at the bar. It seemed like you were the only two here, besides one older guy playing alone at the very end lane.

You took a seat at a table at the opposite end and simply just waited, but the more you were alone with your thoughts the more what happened played through your mind. 

How long had Jin been cheating on you? Had he knowingly been cheating on you while talking about you being his wife someday?

You felt tears sting your eyes again, it was harder to hold them back this time.

Jungkook came back with an entire pitcher of beer and a plastic cup he sat on the table before he looked at you.

You tried to shield your crying eyes. You felt stupid crying at a bowling alley you weren’t even bowling at.

You heard the sounds of him pouring beer into the cup and you heard the cup scoot across the table.

You put your hand down, picked up the cup, and downed it.

“I know it’s hard not to think about, and I know it hurts. You shouldn’t be so embarrassed about crying.” Somehow he was able to read you “we’re pretty much the only ones here.” 

“I know, it just feels so strange crying in such an open place. I’m glad I’m here though.” 

He looked to be thinking about your words for a moment before ducking down in the seat and disappearing under the table.

“Come here,” he asked from under the table as you poured more beer in the plastic cup.

You followed him down under the table miraculously without spilling your drink.

He gave you the biggest, sweetest toothy smile and you couldn’t help but return it. You felt like a child playing hide and seek. 

He began to sing along to September by Earth Wind and Fire that played throughout the bowling alley, even physically reenacting the words just to make you laugh. Behind him, past the table were the prettiest lights. You felt so comfortable, warm, and safe in his yellow jacket.

“Are you okay?” He asked with slight concern.

“Yeah.” You snapped out of it and took another drink of your drink before offering him some.

“No, I have to drive. I got it for you, it’s all yours.” He declined.

“Thank you, for all of this.” You told him “it has made me feel better, I owe you so much.” 

“Don’t mention it.” He shrugged and you couldn’t help but notice just how sturdy his shoulders looked, and his thick tattooed upper arms.

His eyes were just as big and sparkling as when you had met him in high school. You tried to think back on the exact point you met him but you couldn’t remember.

“Jungkook, when did we meet, do you remember?” You asked him curiously.

“Mhm. I remember.” He gave you a nod. “We were all at Seokjin’s and we were setting up monopoly but had to wait because he was waiting on someone else. When you walked in the door I…”

“You just stared at me the whole time, I felt so unwelcome.” You laughed as you remembered.

You looked over at him to see him looking down and playing with one of the chunky rings on his fingers with a shy smile, his shaggy dark waves threatening to obstruct your view of his sheepishness. He was no longer that quiet and shy bowl-cut boy, well, in a sense was, but not to you anymore. He had tattoos all over him and long hair, his ears had a few rings in each. You wondered how someone so sweet could look like that. He was a paradox all on his own and you simply just never understood it, maybe that’s why you had felt like he was a little weird.

“The funny thing was, I had never seen you at school before that, but I saw you everywhere after.”

“I remember the same thing happening.” You replied as your mind went to seeing him in the halls and recalling the little waves he would give you. It made you smile recalling him then and looking at him now.

“You’ve always been so good, Kook.”

His reply was a shy scoffing noise before thanking you.

You noticed the cup you held was empty and looked down at it.

“Want me to get you more up top?” He pointed up and you nodded. He took your cup and told you to stay put as if you might be planning on crawling away. You felt safe here under this table with him, it was like your feelings couldn’t find you as long as you hid under here with him.

He bumped his head on the way back down making you burst out into laughter.

“You think that’s funny you sadist?” He joked as he smiled big and you continued to laugh at him “is that what it takes to make you laugh?” He teased as he handed you your refilled drink. “You know what would be hilarious? Me walking out here and getting hit by a car. You would be in tears with laughter.”

You still laughed but shook your head.

“You know what I think?” He lifted a brow at you “I think you’re drunk.” He accused you.

“No, definitely not. No way.” You denied but both of you knew it was a joke. Everything seemed to lag just a bit and you felt so silly. Your confidence was through the roof and every time you looked at him your heart raced. 

“I think you’re drunk.” You accused him back.

“Me? How? I haven’t drank anything all night.” His warm smile never ended and you swore he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

“I think you’re so drunk that you think I’m drunk.” 

“No no.” You continued with your play fight. “If I was drunk could I do this?” You simply just took another drink of beer.

“Yes?” He chuckled. His laugh alone was enough to make your stomach feel like it was jumping into your throat.

You don’t know what got into you, you don’t know why you did it, but you reached forward and placed your hand on his knee.

There was silence for a moment as he looked down at it. He picked it up and he didn’t quite hold it but took it in a weird handshake way and let your conjoined hands be somewhere in the space between you.

He looked at you and smiled.

“I’m cutting you off. No more drinks for you.” You couldn’t tell if he was joking, or he was hinting for you to stop, your drunk brain had no idea. Instead of trying to figure out if he was rejecting you, you turned his hand over in yours and looked at his hand tattoos and rings, running your hand over each one. You had once heard his tattoos were for his family, but you didn’t know. You let go of his hand and held his arm as you examined those too, some had words you’re drunk brain couldn’t comprehend the meaning of.

“What’s after this?” He asked as he let you look over his skin.

You thought about it.

“I don’t want to go home.” You knew that much. “And I have no friends except…” actually you didn’t have friends anymore.

“My house it is then.��� 

“I don’t have to if- I wouldn’t want to…”

“It’s alright, I don’t mind. I just want to know you’re safe and not in pain… unless you’d feel too uncomfortable.”

“I trust you.” You locked eyes with him. It was the truth, Jungkook had never hurt anyone ever that you can recall. He hadn’t even been mad at any of the others, even when he should’ve been sometimes. If you were bothering him he never would’ve said it, and knowing that made you feel worse, it made you feel like you were.

“I don’t think you’ve ever been to my house, but I have to warn you, it isn’t the best, I’m just a currently jobless IT guy. Kinda lost my job last week.”

“I’m so sorry Kook. I don’t mind, at least it’s not with Jin.” You finished off what was in your cup, he hadn’t been too serious about cutting you off the drinks.

“I’ll be back.” He let you know before crawling out from under the table.

You went to get out from under the table and the moment you stood all the drinks hit you, you held onto the table for stability as you sat back down at your seat. The pitcher of beer was gone so you had either finished it or he had taken it. Your brain was no longer thinking about Jin thankfully, but unfortunately, it was stuck on Jungkook and the way he looked at you and how his hand had felt in yours. Your breath felt shaky about going home with him, not because you were unsure, but because to you that had to mean something. You tried to separate yourself from your drunk mind and realized you didn’t want to push his boundaries when he was being so kind. You were drunk and he wasn’t and you knew he had morals that you just didn’t right now. You shouldn’t hit on him again, but then again he let you hold his hand, didn’t he? Did he? Would you even call that hand-holding? He hadn’t pulled away but that didn’t mean he wasn’t trying to be nice and that didn’t mean he was uncomfortable. You felt bad about doing it, but the drunk and hurt part of you wanted something, some kind of closeness with anyone so the hurt could be replaced just for now. It was all wrong of you.

Your brain spun as you looked off into nothing at all of the dancing colorful lights of the bowling alley. Maybe Jungkook wanted to take advantage of you, maybe he saw this as an opportunity, and as wrong as that sounded you would’ve been okay with that. Your mind stuck to that idea like a fly stuck in honey.

“Ready?” He asked as he held out his hand for you to help you out of the seat.

You stumbled a bit as you took your first few steps but he grabbed you around the waist.

“Careful.” He said so gently and so patiently but it did nothing to ease your turbulent thoughts and feelings. As he held your body like this, it made you want to hold him back, but you fought the urge. He was just helping you get to the car so you didn’t fall flat on your ass.

He buckled you in murmuring a quiet apology for seemingly no reason.

His car smelled of him. It was funny how you never noticed before he had his own scent, it was a bit like cinnamon or some kind of spice and fresh laundry. It hung all around you, on his coat, the fabric of his car, and even on your hands from touching his. 

You looked at him as he drove, the whole time, and if he noticed he hadn’t said a word about it. You felt fully wrapped in him and yet you ached for more, more than just this casual friendliness.

“Do you promise to tell me if I bother you… in any way at all.” Your mouth blurted out.

“I promise.” You watched him smile at your odd request. “You never have bothered me yet.”

The reassurance was what you needed for your mind to feel content for now.

The silence was comforting after all the music and crying and drinking and all the things you had seen tonight. You almost fell asleep, almost.

The keys jingling and a car door closing woke you up. You looked around to see apartment buildings just as Jungkook opened your side car door. You unbuckled yourself.

“Do you need me to carry-“ 

You got to your feet on your own but grabbed for his arm.

“Wait.” He announced before getting to his knees in the parking lot.

He took your leg in his hand and took off one of your heels before taking the other off. He then put an arm under your leg and one on your back before you were horizontal in his arms.

“There are steps up here. I didn’t want you falling in those shoes.” He commented as he carried you and your shoes. You wrapped your arms around his neck so he might have an easier time.

“Would you laugh if I fell down the stairs?” 

“Only for a second.” He teased

“You sadist.” You snorted.

The way his body and muscles felt against you as he packed you up the stairs to his apartment door made you more lightheaded than all the alcohol you had tonight.

He put you down to unlock his door but his hands went back into you to help you walk through it.

He flipped on the lights to reveal his apartment.

His living room area consisted of a mattress on the floor with dark blue sheets and a blanket, it faced a big TV on a stand with game systems and even a computer tower.

The headboard of his bed was the bar that separated the tiny kitchen from the living area.

To the far side were two doors, you assumed one was a bathroom and another door that looked like it slid open could be a closet.

“Quaint, right?” He asked.

“It’s very you.” You said as you breathed the scent of him hanging all around you.

“I was thinking you could have the bed and I could sleep on the floor.” He commented.

“Haven’t you been sleeping on the floor anyway?” You joked. “It’s a big bed, but it also could be a couch. So I could have the couch and you could have the bed. I don’t see any other way around this.”

“You’re okay with us both sharing…?” He asked as if you hadn’t already been thinking about it before you found out the only place to sit or lay in here was his bed.

“Do you mind?” You asked.

“Uh uh.” He shook his head and took off across the room. You wobbled on over to his bed and had a seat. You watched as he slid the closet door open.

He threw a pair of pajama pants and a white t-shirt behind him onto the bed before pulling out more clothes he kept in his arms.

“The bathroom is-“ 

You cut him off by pointing to the only other room in the apartment. You picked up the clothes and he asked if you needed help getting in there but you shook your head.

You had to hold onto the sink as you dressed in the foreign fabric of his clothing, but even though it felt odd, you still felt comfortable. You did your best to drunkenly wash your face before coming back out. The room was dim, and the Netflix home page was the only light. He was in the tiny open kitchen half of the room in grey sweatpants and a black shirt setting a glass of water onto the island.

“Drink.” He pointed and you did as he asked but could only stomach half the glass. You were sure to thank him for his kind gift of water before you went over to his bed on the floor and got in.

“Here.” He placed a remote on your torso before crawling into the bed himself.

But you didn’t want to watch anything at all. Being next to him was enough entertainment for you.

You looked over at him, hands comfortably resting behind his head, waiting for you to pick something. 

You passed the remote back to him by placing it on his stomach and found his open side too inviting for you not to want with all of your heart.

You rolled onto your side and scooted closer and closer until you put your head on the place between his armpit and shoulder. He didn’t stop you from laying on his chest. He turned the tv off making the room go dark before he let his arm fall around you and cradle you.

You laid in silence a moment.

“Tomorrow is going to be better.” He whispered but you were already drifting from the closeness and peace you felt for now. You took a deep breath in and held his scent in your nose for a moment so it would permanently brand into your brain.

“You smell so good.” You muttered already half asleep.

You heard yet another amused scoff come from him and felt the little laugh on his chest under your head.

“Go to bed.” He joked.

And you did, as you listened to his rhythmic heartbeat, beat after steady beat, unfailing and never letting you down. There was always another right after the last.

The quiet click of a door woke you. You could see sunlight flooding through your closed eyelids, you could feel the warmth in the bed and on your skin. As you laid there you could hear other little sounds, straining to be quiet but failing.

Your eyes opened and you were disoriented for a moment.

You sat up but realized the noises were coming from behind.

“Jungkook?” You sleepily let out as you winced at the bright light coming through the sheer curtains from behind the tv.

“I’m sorry if I woke you up.” You heard his apologetic voice. 

“No, it was just time to get up.” You grunted as you gave a stretch hard enough your bones cracked.

“Want some cereal?” 

You both casually sat in the bed eating. He had given you a massive bowl of cereal you felt obligated to finish. He was fully dressed while you sat there still in his pajamas.

“You want to stay again today?” He asked bluntly as his eyes focused on whatever anime he had turned on.

“I couldn’t Jungkook, you’ve been so kind and I just-“

“I don’t mind.” He shrugged and crunched up another bite.

“Why?” You decided to ask but he shrugged again.

“Having someone here is kind of fun. It’s like a sleepover I guess.” 

He was so childish in the oddest ways, it was kind of charming. You began to remember all of your thoughts from last night and thanked yourself for not trying too hard to make him uncomfortable. He pushed back his hair with his hands before taking another bite of the colorful cereal. He had the heart and empathy of an angel, even with the tattoos on his hands that he ate his kids’ cereal with.

“Then what are we doing today Kook?” You asked.

“You need clothes. Also, do you know how to skateboard?”

You felt those two things in the same breath were a bit odd but that was just him.

Before long, you found yourself in a cheap store grabbing whatever would fit you and you could wear in public and not feel too bad about it.

“Why’d you ask if I could skateboard?” You asked as he pulled out of the store parking lot. You had already gotten dressed in the bathroom and were ready for whatever weird thing he wanted to do.

“Do you?” 

“No.” You shook your head.

“Wanna learn?”

“Sure.” 

“I’m going to teach you how Yoongi taught me when I was sixteen.”

“How did he teach you?” 

“He taught me not to be scared.” Was his only reply, and you accepted it. You liked the element of surprise he added to everyday life, you liked how he didn’t take a lot too seriously. You admired that. Your life with Jin had always been work amongst jokes now and then but it hadn’t felt fun, even when you were both young. You felt like you could probably learn a lot from Jungkook.

“Let’s get some food first. It’s almost dinner time, are you hungry? You kept a while and all you’ve eaten today was cereal.” 

You paid for lunch. You got some fries you picked at between watching the wind blow through his hair as you ate outside at a little burger place. He stuffed his mouth full with every bite. A mess of tomatoes and condiments would drop from the burger and onto the wrapper in his lap.

“What’s something you’ve always wanted to do?” You asked him.

“Hmmm.” He thought with a mouthful. “Maybe live in a better house.” 

“That’s it?” You couldn’t help but laugh at the simplicity of what he desired.

“Yeah.” He smiled and wiped his mouth. “You?” 

“I wanted to live or at least visit somewhere warm. I was supposed to go on a trip to Hawaii with Jin, it was a surprise… I wanted to live there one day but he has to work here.” you felt yourself falling back into the heartbreak.

“You don’t need him to go to Hawaii. You could move there now if you wanted and no one could hold you back.” 

“Yeah.” You agreed but it sounded sad.

“You afraid of being alone?” He asked a question that hit you too hard. 

All of your adult life and even your teenage years all you knew was Seokjin, you had always had someone there, your parents or Jin, you had never really had to be alone or think of a future with only yourself until now.

“No.” You lied. There was a strange quiet.

“I’m sorry if that-“

“You should come with me to Hawaii.” You blurted out fully interrupting him.

“Do you want that?” He questioned as if you hadn’t thought it through, and you hadn’t but that didn’t mean you didn’t mean it.

“Yes. Do you?” You were so afraid of him saying no and you didn’t quite know why.

“It’s not like I don’t have anything I can just put on hold for… however long. It’ll be fun. I’d like that.” 

The conversation felt like something more to you somehow, like some secret agreement was just made.

“We should do this before it gets dark.” He commented “ready?” 

Your fries were cold and you had been just waiting on him to finish eating.

You took at the top of the street on a hill with him after walking a block from where he had parked and dragged a skateboard out of the backseat.

“This is where Yoongi taught me to skateboard, he pushed me down here.” He pointed to the steep road that luckily wasn’t too busy.

“And you’re going to push me down it? I’d kill you.” You crossed your arms disapprovingly.

“No, see, you’re going to push yourself down it. If you sit on the skateboard it will be easier and you probably won’t fall, it will be fun.”

“Your idea of fun gets crazier and crazier.” You pointed out.

“Sit, I’ll stay behind you.” 

“No, because it’s going to pick up speed faster than you can run as I’m going down the hill.” Your brain had already torn the scenario apart and your chances of getting hurt were probably around one hundred percent. Even though you knew that you sat down on the skateboard.

“Okay, now just look down, get a feel for it, take it in.” He instructed as you looked down at the steeply sloping road below.

“Jungkook this is dangerous.” You commented.

He stood behind you and wrapped his arms around you in kind of a hug.

“You’re okay, nothing bad is going to happen to you, alright? I’m right here.” He whispered and you nodded. “Close your eyes, keep them closed.” 

You did as he asked you could feel him wheeling you closer and closer. Put your feet down to stop you from going just yet. I’m going to let go, you’re going to count to ten and without opening your eyes, you’re going to push yourself. Stay as still as you can even if you’re scared. Only open them when I have you.”

Your breath shook, but you gave him confirmation.

“Count.” He said as he released you.

You slowly counted, the nerves in your stomach growing the higher each number got. You gripped the bottom of the board with both hands and when you got to ten you used your legs to push off before tucking them back onto the board.

You let out a scream as you felt the speed at which you were falling, you could feel tears in your squeezed closed eyes.

He caught you by the arm. It was all over before it had even started.

You were breathing heavily and clung to his jacket.

“You’re safe, you’re okay.” He assured you and helped you to your feet.

You were at the bottom of the hill and your heart was racing with your eyes still watering. 

“Are you crying?” He grinned.

“JUNGKOOK I COULD’VE DIED!” You slapped at his arm but he dodged it only making him laugh more at your annoyance.

“Look! You did that by yourself!” He commented with proudness.

“I could’ve died.” You repeated.

“But you didn’t.” He still wore a grin.

The sunset filtering through his dark hair, his laughter, and him trying to escape you chasing him by walking backward felt oddly beautiful. His skin looked a shade of golden like this.

You pulled on his jacket to pull him in, you thought about kissing him, everything in you told you to preserve this moment. Would he let you? Would he let you at least hold his hand again?  but instead, you wrapped your arms around him.

“Today is better, thank you.” You squeezed him. Your arms stayed around him for as long as his stay on your back. It was a while that you both just stood there hugging in the street like dumbasses.

“What do you want to do now?” He asked as he released you “you’ve put up with me all day so it’s your turn to pick.”

“Honestly,” you both began the trek back to his car. “I just want another drink.”

“Understandable. Let’s stay home and drink tonight, it will be easier.” He suggested.

“I would rather.” You agreed you interlocked your arm in his as you walked, and again he let you. You wondered for a moment why he was letting you be this close to him and touch him so much, but he never initiated it. You decided thinking about any of that was not for the best and you let it go.

You stopped at a liquor store and got more vodka and snacks than either of you would ever need for one night.

Before you started drinking you both took a turn having a shower and he started some laundry. Everything was so casual with the both of you, eating chips on the bed while he beat your ass at a fighting game three times in a row, he did let you win three times after that to make up for it. The loser had to take a shot and now you each had three.

“Last one. You’re going to win and I’m going to switch games.” You announced as you picked your character. 

“You don’t know if I’m going to win.” You could hear the smile in his voice. You knew it was either he won or he let you win, and he let you win yet again.

“Don’t be such a hero.” You laughed as he had to gulp down the fourth drink of vodka. His nose wrinkled at the taste.

“Let’s just play something both of us have an equal shot at winning. Since you’re good at video games it can’t be that.” You decided. You thought about what you could do that didn’t require much skill if any. You scooted closer to him on the mattress on the floor so you could face him, knee to knee.

“Got it. Hold up five fingers.” You told him and did the same.

“I know this game.” He said holding up five tattooed fingers.

“Good, loser takes three shots.” You made up the rules and he nodded in agreement. You scooted in closer and he faced you. You were going into dangerous territory with this and you knew it, but let it go under the guise of: this is just for fun.

“Put a finger down if you’ve ever gotten black out drunk.” You said and he put a finger down and you didn’t.

“Put a finger down if you’ve thrown up in public.” He said and neither of you put a finger down.

“Put a finger down if you’ve ever… eaten something off of someone’s body.” You watched as his finger stayed up but you put yours down.

“Are you trying to lose?” He laughed

“We’re even.” You pointed out.

“Not for long. Put a finger down if you’ve ever had public sex.”

You put a finger down.

“Put a finger down if… you’ve ever… let someone win in a game.” You laughed as you brought up earlier and he put a finger down.

“Put a finger down if… you’re y/n.” He grinned.

“You know what? Just give me the damn three shots, I forfeit.” You sighed knowing that it was time to play dirty in every sense of the word.

“I’ll take three with you.” He decided. Of course he would, he was the kindest man ever. You could’ve already guessed he would say that before he even did.

You took them together and only let yourself grimace after the last one.

“Again, I’ll start this time.” He announced, screwing the cap on the vodka. You could hear him slur his speech just a little.

You both held up five fingers once again.

“Put down a finger if you’ve ever had a pregnancy scare.”

Neither of you put down a finger, but the questions were beginning to get a bit more heavy. He seemed to have the same idea as you.

“You’ve ever had someone cum inside of you or came inside of someone without a condom.” You were stepping up your questions now but neither of you were putting fingers down.

“If anyone has ever gone down on you for more than thirty minutes.” He asked but again you both still had five fingers. “Wow, that really sucks for us.” He muttered.

“If you’ve ever had a thing for someone in your friends circle.” You announced. Slowly but surely you both put down a finger. Your drunk beau was ignoring the little voice in your head screaming at you to stop. Jungkook was your friend, a friend who might even have the same feelings as you did right now.

“If you’ve ever thought about kissing someone in your friend circle.” He asked and put a finger down and so did you. You felt like you were both edging towards the inevitable and dangerous with questions like this, but you couldn’t shut your mouth.

“If you’ve ever thought about fucking them.” Your own question made you swallow as you both put a third finger.

“If you’ve ever thought about what it would be like to be in a relationship with them.” He asked quietly. Your fourth fingers went down together.

There was only one left and it was your turn. You both knew now you were talking about each other, but it was hard to believe. You were scared it wasn’t you, maybe he was into guys too. You just had to ask, you had to.

Your eyes locked. You felt nervous. He looked nervous as he bit at his lip between those two front teeth you were becoming so fond of seeing when he smiled.

“Put a finger down if…” it was hard to speak, you had to swallow down the knot of nerves in your throat and take a deep breath before continuing “if the person we’re talking about is each other.”

His pointer finger curled down and so did yours.

 “For how long?” You asked.

“From the start.” He admitted. “But you’ve never felt that way.”

“I do now.” You leaned in. At least now you were sure how he felt, or at least you thought.

He stopped you by placing a hand on your arm.

“I don’t want it to be like this.” His voice was so quiet it was barely above a whisper.

You sat back and waited for him to explain.

“I don’t want it to be… I don’t want to be a rebound. I think friendship comes before feelings anyway and that’s why I did this. I don’t want to kiss you while we’re drunk, I don’t want you to regret anything.” 

“Oh.” You let out. 

“I can’t do this when you’re drunk and sad and trying to fill a void, that wouldn’t be okay of me to do. I want… I want more than that and you just got out of a relationship… or maybe you didn’t yet… but I can wait until it’s all over, I feel like that’s the right thing to do here.”

You sat there a moment as his drunk words registered in your brain. For just a second you wished you weren’t drunk so you could try to tell him how you were feeling but decided to give it your best shot anyway.

“I like you. I’m sorry I was so blinded by Jin all these years that I couldn’t see you liked me because if I hadn’t been maybe we both could’ve been better off. Maybe I could’ve had more days like this with you, hundreds more where we just do crazy things, where we could just sleep on a mattress on the floor and still feel happy and content with life. Jungkook if I would’ve known you felt this way and I would’ve known how life could be, at any point, then I’d probably be the one cheating. I want you. I want you and it’s not just because I’m afraid to be alone, you make me do things I never would’ve done. And your heart, your heart is made of pure gold. I want us both to just forget everything before now, everything we’ve been through, not because it hurts but because it just feels like it should’ve been us all along. And if you only knew how many times I’ve had to stop myself from kissing or touching you today when I was perfectly sober and perfectly happy…”

“I want that. I’ve wanted that.” He seemed like he was talking to himself more than you.

He was now the one leaning forward and your face got stuck in his pull.

Your lips met very gently and your eyes drifted closed so you could lose yourself in it.

His tongue wasn’t at all rough or demanding with yours, but it was needy.

You climbed into his lap and not a minute passed between that time and the time he was helping you fall backward, settling himself between your legs so effortlessly.

Your hands ran under his shirt slowly, creeping up until his shirt bunched prompting him to sit up and take it off.

You could feel him hard between your legs but there was so much fabric separating the both of you that it became frustrating to buck into him.

“I can’t fuck you.” He decided to your dismay. “But I just want to feel you.” 

You let him slide your shirt off so your bare chests were pressed together as mouths continued to move together in new ways every second, patternless unlike his heartbeat but exciting like the things he made you do.

He yanked the blankets up around you both and let himself grind into you slowly as you whimpered for more.

Your mouth went to his neck, sucking at his skin passionately and listening to the beautiful moans he made for you. You could’ve done this to him all night, just taste his skin and let his spit intermix with yours, but he decided to bite off even more.

His head sunk and he took a nipple in his mouth. The feeling went right to your throbbing and needy clit.

“Oh god fuck me.” You breathed “please just let me closer. I need more.” 

He pinched at your nipple softly between his teeth and you gripped his shoulder.

“I’m so wet, I don’t think one ever wanted anything mo-“

His mouth left your breast and yanked his pajama pants off of you and took off the ones he was wearing as you finished kicking off yours.

You were both down to your underwear now though you wished it was less.

While you weren’t going to force him to do anything he didn’t want to, it sure seemed like he wanted to do this.

You felt him reach into his underwear and adjust himself before rutting into you again with a groan.

Your hands freely moved across his skin, feeling goosebumps that had risen under your touch.

You knew that you were so wet at this point that it had to leak through the fabric of both yours and his underwear, you knew he felt it.

“Is there anything I’m allowed to do? Kook, you’re killing me.” You whined.

“I don’t have condoms.” He commented.

“I get a birth control shot but I understand if you don’t want to…” you trailed off.

“I don’t know what I want to do… I- but I think I have an idea. Let’s take the last of it off.” 

He seemed nervous as you both kicked off your remaining two pieces, and then you were bare for each other.

“You’re not a virgin right?” You asked from the way he was acting so nervously. 

“Oh. No, no. I- Uh I just feel like it’s wrong still... like I’m not supposed to. This can’t be happening.” He reached down between the both of you again.

“Nothing has to happen-“ 

“I’m so hard.” It was a whisper of a breathless whine that interrupted you. His knuckles brushed your folds and you realized he had his cock in his hand, pumping it slowly.

“Why the fuck are you so unbelievably hot?” Tumbled from your mind and fell from your mouth.

“You need to be seeing things from my view right now.” He looked over what parts of your body he could “dear god.” 

He finally released his cock and let it fall between your folds. He gave a thrust and felt the weight of his cock slide against your clit because of the wetness.

You didn’t expect him to shove his fingers into you, but that alone was enough to nearly make you cum from all the teasing he had put you through.

He pulled them out and held his sticky thoroughly coated fingers in the air.

“Oh my god.” He whispered quickly and shakily. 

You had never, ever been this wet in your life. You could hear the sound as he spread your juices and his pre-cum over his cock and brought it back to place it between your folds.

He came back down and every time he thrust how his slick cock rubbed your clit over and over.

Moans and whines escaped both of you but it just wasn’t enough for you to imagine him plowing into you, you needed to feel it.

“Oh god, I bet you would feel so fucking good inside of me. I’d cum for you so fast.”

You had earned a soft groan from him, he was losing it.

“I want to fuck you so badly. I want to cum all inside of you. Neither of us had ever done that before, can I?”

You felt him shift the head of his dick to your entrance.

“I will beg you, please do it.” you closed your eyes in a prayer that he actually would.

“Fuck.” he let out as he slipped into you, you took every last inch of him. 

He was already sweating and grunting before he had started thrusting, but after he started jackhammering into you, there was a new look and feel about him. His damp strands hung loosely, his nose crinkled as he hit his lip with the force he was putting into each thrust.

“I’m going to cum.” you announced not even a minute in.

He grabbed one of your legs, threw it over his shoulder, and was pushing hard. Your body bounced at the force, your head bumped the kitchen Island that was his headboard until he dragged your body animalistically lower on the bed.

“I wanna- I wanna hear you.” he panted. 

“Don’t stop- that- keep doing that,” you instructed. He was short on breath and a sweaty mess.

“Go on, I've got you. I've got you,” he assured you, keeping the pace of his hips the same.

Your orgasm crashed into you all at once like a semi-truck through a small building.

You felt like you had just gone down that hill again. Your heart was racing and you knew he was too.

You pulled him into your lips messily as your brain melted into a blissful spice and laundry scented puddle.

He mounded loudly against your lips as his body moved against yours.

“Coming.” He whispered his next few breaths were sharp, pumping into you a few more solid times, you could feel his cum spill into you as his sweaty forehead pressed into yours.

When his hips stilled, there was only the sound of rough breaths, he kept his eyes closed for a moment and swallowed hard.

“How-how was that?” He propped himself above you on shaky arms. In the dark you could see the beads of sweat that pulled on his face and neck, his chest rose and fell and still made no move to pull out of you.

“I-“ you tried to find even a single word for the experience you had just had. “I didn’t know it could be like that.”

He let out a strong huff of a laugh and grinned down at you with the biggest and sweetest eyes that looked to search your face.

“That was something.” He agreed but looked like he had something on his mind. 

He gave you a soft kiss on your lips before he finally pulled out and laid beside you, only to have the embarrassing feeling of his cum leaking from you and down your butt crack.

You jumped up, only making matters worse, cupping your crotch as you took off to the bathroom faster than he could ask any sort of questions.

As you cleaned yourself up you couldn’t believe everything that had happened between you two. you didn’t for a second regret it, the opposite.

As you walked out of the bathroom he was standing on the floor by the bed with only his pajama pants on, holding a bag of chips. He turned to you and laughed.

“We just had sex with the Mortal Kombat music.”

You stood there naked and you couldn’t help but laugh back.

That tender time you had just had together had just been spent jarring fight music and you didn’t even realize. That’s what he did to you. When you were with him the entire world and all of your problems fell away.

You put back on your pajamas, still laughing to yourself as you heard the music still play.

“Now every time I hear it I’ll think of you.” 

“Please don’t associate us having sex with that” you laid back down and he got into the bed with you. 

He fed you a chip and you thought that was pretty cute so you took him by the shirt and pulled him into your lips.

He pulled away for a moment.

“Round two, fight!” 

You laughed so hard at the stupid Mortal Kombat joke that you snorted and he found that pretty amusing. A tickle fight broke out and of course, he got you pinned and of course, you couldn’t help but kiss him again.

A knock at the door interrupted you both making him stiffen and both of your heads turn in the direction of the door.

“What do I do?” You mouthed to him he climbed off of you and sat up.

“Who is it?” He called out.

“Jimin.” The answer came from the other side of the door.

You grimaced at each other and decided to jump up and go hide in his closet. You tucked yourself in between his few shirts and hanging pants and closed the door.

You could hear Jungkook walk to the door and open it. There were now two sets of footprints inside the apartment.

“You weren’t answering any texts and I got worried about you.” You heard Jimin's voice clearly.

“Been busy.” You think Jungkook muttered.

“Looks like it,” Jimin replied with obvious sarcasm. You wondered if it was all the snacks and alcohol on the floor, the video games left on, or the marks that decorated Jungkook’s neck that made him say that.

“You hear about what happened with Jin and y/n the other night at the bar?” Jimin asked and waited a moment “I guess he cheated on her, you were right this whole time about it.”

“It sucks she had to go through all of that. How’s she holding up?” Jungkook was playing dumb.

“I don't know, I haven't talked to her. It's Jin’s business, not mine.” 

That hurt you. You had always thought of you and Jimin as pretty close friends.

“Plus I heard she disappeared anyway. Jin is speculating she took off to Hawaii on her own. Namjoon told me he told the police everything this morning wanting to file a missing person report. He thought it was suspicious she just left all of her stuff, but the police said she hadn’t been gone long enough and they had an argument and probably just wanted to be away from him.”

“Do you think she’s okay?” Jungkook seemed genuinely concerned even though you were right in his closet.

“I don’t know. Yoongi was a little worried she got kidnapped at the bar after she stormed out. I don’t think anyone is looking for her though, I think she just wanted to get away. Also, you kind of disappeared that night at the bar too, didn’t you?” 

Oh shit. Was Jimin putting it all together? 

“I took someone to my place and she stayed a few nights. I don’t think I was there when all of this went down.” Jungkook’s alibi seemed solid, you hadn’t even seen him in the bar when you had gotten there.

“Well, I just wanted to stop by and check in on you.” 

“Thank you.” Jungkook’s reply sounded sincere.

“You should probably clean up a little, maybe get a real bed, it just looks kind of… sad.”

Jimin didn’t sound concerned, he sounded almost mean about it to you.

“Noted. Will do. Thanks for stopping by man.” Jungkook continued to be kind to him until he left.

You stepped out of the closet dumbfounded as Jungkook said nothing about the way Jimin had treated him or nearly accused him. He just got back into bed seemingly unphased. You followed after and just laid there for a moment thinking about times when they had all been mean to him at least once.

“Please don’t let them do that to you.” You asked.

“Hm? Oh. Yeah. That’s just what it’s like being the youngest. I’m used to them looking down on me.” 

“it doesn’t have to be that way.” 

“Why not?” He seemed genuinely interested in what you were saying because he rolled onto his side to face you.

You rolled onto yours to face him in the dark. Hair was in his face but he was looking at you with those big brown eyes.

“It can be you and me against the world if you wanted. If one of our skateboards went flying down a hill, we would be there to catch the other before they got hurt. Do you want to do that with me?” You couldn’t believe you had the guts to ask that but what you couldn’t believe even more was his reply.

“I want to do that with you. Let’s do that. I haven’t let you fall and get hurt yet, have I?” He grinned.

Little did he know that you already had fallen.

You brought your hand up to his face before scooting closer and placing your forehead against his

“Promise me you won’t let me fall.” You whispered.

“I promise.” His answer was instantaneous.

“Then I won’t let you either. Well just protect each other.” 

“Deal.” He replied before connecting your lips. 

As you kissed him you wondered if he felt the same about you as you did him already. He had to know that you were so scared, so terrified of being hurt again and that’s why you wanted to make this deal.

His hand slid down your body and back up causing your shirt to bunch. His warm hand made its way back down your skin again and just as it snaked into the band of his pajama pants you were wearing, a loud hum startled you both.

You were confused for a moment as the room grew slightly brighter.

Your phone was ringing on the wood floor.

You sat up, squinting your eyes as you picked up the phone and looked at the screen that was far too bright.

“Jin.” Your voice wasn’t at all cheerful.

“Are you going to answ-“ Jungkook’s sentence was cut off by the sound of you turning off your phone and putting it back down. 

“I can’t, I just… I don’t want to talk to him right now, I don’t want to feel that right now again… if ever. I saw what I saw and there’s no way he can convince me that I didn't see it or that you didn't too, we have photos. I'm not sure that I really ever want to talk to him again. I feel so… differently about him now and I don’t think there's any repairing that.”

He sat up, picked up his phone from his side, and turned it off too before you both laid back down.

“Good night kook.” You announced with Jin’s call not leaving you feeling right but not wanting to think about it right now.

“Night.” He replied as he pulled you against his body.

Although you tried to refuse your brain the opportunity of letting the thought of Jin right now entirely wreck your time with Jungkook, it was hard. You thought of all the restless nights when you stayed up working as an excuse to wait for Jin to get home from going out or working late. There were rarely nights like this where you could curl up against him, looking back on it there were no nights that you felt as cared about as you did now. A thought stuck to you, one you decided to think more on the next day. Did this all happen for a reason? For both of you? Would all of the suffering you’ve both been through in your relationships be worth it now?.

You felt something soft and warm on your head. A kiss.

“Morning.” you felt a delicate breath of his whisper on your face.

“Morning.” You muttered. Your eyes stayed closed as you reached out for him and pulled him into you. He let out a quiet laugh as he let you drag him onto you as if he were your teddy bear.

“I’ve been awake a while, I went to the store in my pajamas and I thought you’d be awake by the time I got back.”

“But I wasn’t so you woke me up instead?” 

You felt his hands run up your sides and lift your shirt until the hem and bunched fabric sat under your breasts.

“I missed you.” 

“You missed me?” you couldn't help but smile before it was quickly wiped away by him crawling back a little and kissing the skin above your belly button.

“Mmm.” he hummed an answer before kissing just a bit lower.

“Remember the thing that we both never had?” you looked down to see his big brown eyes look up at you through a mess of dark hair.

It took you a moment with your still sleep fogged brain to realize what he was talking about.

“Hey Siri, set a timer for thirty minutes,”

The robotic voice replied it’s confirmation on his phone, but he was already yanking down your pants and you were lifting your butt so he could get them off.

He gently pushed your legs apart and laid on his stomach between them, starting to run very agonizingly slow kisses up your thigh. With every small warm kiss that felt just too close or every warm breath you felt of his, a tingle of anticipation went through your body. 

“I just keep thinking,” he placed another kiss on your thigh so close you felt his cheek brush against where you needed his mouth the most before he teasingly moved into the other leg “about how I have you right here” another slow kiss “after wanting you for so, so long.” 

His words hit you hard and you knew they were making you wetter. You had never been dirty talked so sweetly before, hell, it wasn’t even dirty yet here you were soaking wet and more than ready for whatever he wanted to do to you just minutes after waking up.

“God only knows” his lips touched your slit now and it was almost too much to bear “how many times I've imagined this.” his tongue dipped into your folds and licked from bottom to top, you moaned a little too loudly and jerked slightly as his wet muscle touched your clit.

You were so ready but his lips went back to your thigh. You said nothing as he repeated this pattern once and then twice, you began to more than look forward to when his tongue would meet your clit again, after the third time you swore you could cum on the next one, he was driving you insane with his teasing pattern, you felt like he was never going to let you have what you wanted.

“Jungkook please!” you nearly yelled as he once again went back to your thigh to start over. He froze, looked up at you through all of that hair with raised eyebrows, and gave you a smile of amusement.

“If you don't stop and just get on with it already then you'll see what I do to you.” you threatened.

“Maybe I'd like to find out.” he retorted.

“Get on with it!” you wailed loudly as you gave him a half pleading glare.

“Make. Me.” he looked you dead in the eyes as he spoke. It was enough to send a feeling that felt like electricity trickling through you. You started to get up to take control but he pulled your hips flat back to the bed with a delighted smile.

“Seriously?” you laughed.

“What are you gonna do?” 

You were growing more sexually frustrated with him by the second.

“Just wait.” you threatened again.

He bent his head down and kissed the folds over your clit. You took the opportunity to place your hand on his head and not let him up.

You felt him give a little laugh before he finally went to work licking and sucking at your bundle of nerves as your fingers twisted in his hair. A few moments later you felt his fingers slip into your wet cunt and press upwards, giving you everything you wanted all at once.

It hit you all at once, your orgasm shot through you. You muttered his name as you gripped his hair tighter and felt him moan into you making the pleasure feel that much better. Even though you had already cum, it was clear he wasn’t about to stop, his fingers and mouth were working you so passionately and quickly. You were so sensitive your legs twitched every time his mouth did something too rough with you, but it just felt so good. 

You looked down at him between your legs as you felt yourself building up again and watched his eyes shut and his head moving between your legs. You don’t know how or why you found it as hot as you did, but it was enough to make you cum again just as the timer on his phone went off.

“Fuck fuck fuck” you breathed as a blissful feeling washed over you like an oven wave

He looked up at you and as soon as he was sure you were done, he stopped. He went to wipe his mouth on the back of his arm when you demanded he take his pants off.

He looked at you with raised eyebrows and a little surprise.

“Tell it to set a timer for thirty minutes.” 

“I-oh-okay. You don’t need to do that if you-“

“Do it.” You demanded once more as you took off your shirt.

“Hey Siri, set a timer for thirty minutes.” He said as he shed himself of his pajamas and sat up.

A thought had crossed your mind to tease him as he had you, but you couldn’t do that. You loved the look of it thick and veiny, the head of it already leaking from everything he had just done to you. You wanted the feeling of it filling your mouth and throat, you wanted to please him.

You watched as his already hard cock stood tall waiting for you to touch it, and you wasted no time doing so. You leaned down only playing with the head in your mouth with your tongue at first, getting a feel for the satisfaction of him inside of your mouth. He gasped when you took him all abruptly into the back of your throat. You decided immediately that you wanted to hear more of that sound so you let your head bob before your hand joined in at his shaft to help. You didn’t start slow whatsoever. You were set on making him cum faster and harder than he ever had before, throwing out the idea of time altogether. 

He sat back on his hands to hold himself up but those began to shake too the faster you went. Spit ran down onto his balls and you thought about playing with them but you felt like that might tip him over the edge. 

He was full of open-mouth moans, ones you wouldn’t mind hearing the rest of your life to the body and cock and personality of a man you wouldn’t mind having the rest of your life.

Just as you thought about it you shut the thought down and concentrated on making him feel better.

“God, you’re so beautiful.” You made out from his moans.

You kept going and felt his hips thrust up into your face in tandem with your movements. He was close, unbelievably, but for some reason, he was hanging on. Only a moment later you found out why.

“Fuck me. I bought condoms this morning, fuck me. Please I’m begging you.”

You pulled your mouth off of his cock with a lewd noise and looked at him but he was already standing up, dick as hard as a statue to crinkle a plastic bag on the island beside you both. 

“I’m deathly scared of having children when living in a place so small and with no job…”

“Thank you.” You didn't know what else to say as you watched him rip off a packet, come back to his knees, and roll the condom onto himself. 

“But then again if I did… wouldn’t that just fuck with Jin knowing I got you pregnant?” He lifted a brow.

Something about that turned you into a complete animal. You kept onto his lap and clung to him. Your lips smashed into his as you reached between the both of you and guided his dick into your hole. 

He felt just as good and filling inside of your pussy as he did your mouth. No one has ever filled you up this well, no one had ever wanted you so much.

He thrust upwards with you on his lap. You were practically a rag doll under the grip he had on your hips.

You began to rock your hips to the steady and slow way his hands commanded them.

“Ahh god.” He moaned as he let his head fall onto your shoulder and you wrapped your arms wrap around his shoulders so that your bodies pressed together.

“I love you.” He placed a kiss on your shoulder blade and whispered into your sweat sticky skin.

Your heart stopped but your hips didn’t.

He said it. It had taken him only three days. You recalled it had taken Seokjin six months and fifteen days exactly to say what Jungkook had in only three. The both of you had figured it out in only three days.

“I love you too.” You raced to say. 

His lips caught yours as he pressed you down onto his cock hard and rolled his hips under you with a grunt.

“These have been the best days of my life with you and I want to keep it that way. I want them all to be the best.” He was out of breath, his eyes were closed and his forehead rested against yours.

“Please.” You begged for the same. “Let’s move away and just be together.”

He let out a small laugh before he smiled.

“Is this gross? This is so weird, it’s only been three days.”

“I’ve never been happier.” You stated a fact. You had thought about it and thought about it non-stop. It wasn’t just attraction, lust, or infatuation you felt for him, this ran deep, deep into his personality, deep into the way he thought and did things. Far deeper than his cock that was buried inside of you right now.

“I bet I could make you happier.” He tried to hide a prideful smile.

“Oh yeah? How so?” You couldn’t help but smile back.

“I could make you cum again.”

Before you could answer he was giving you a quick kiss before practically tossing you off of him with a grin.

He grabbed your hips and flipped you over so that you were on all fours. The tingle that you got down your spine from this gesture was unbelievable.

“Hurry up and fuck me.” You demanded but he shushed you as you felt him press into your cunt.

He had only been not inside of you for a moment but your body had missed the feeling.

You gasped as you felt his grips tighten on your hips and pull your body backward onto him. He went full speed, full force slamming into you. His balls slapped against you. You were already so sensitive, so sore and tired, but you continued to want more.

“Has Jin ever fucked you like this?” 

You had never heard his voice so rough, so teasing, so devilish. You were about to lose it.

“No.” You whined.

“Who does this pussy belong to? Who’s the only person to ever cum inside of you?”

Your arms were shaking, struggling to hold yourself up. Your mouth was slightly open and your brain was so lost that you struggled for even the most simple reply.

“You.” Managed to move from your brain to your lips.

You felt his hand reach around to your clit and begin to rub fast and hard circles. It didn’t take long after that for your brain to shut down, to make way for the orgasm that blew through you like a car explosion. Your arms gave out and your face ended up on the mattress while your ass stayed in the air for him. You felt like you had melted as his dirty talk became mutters and moans. You felt his cock get harder inside of you and spill warm liquid into the condom. 

“I’ve-“ he panted from behind you with his hips now still “I’ve never had sex that good- besides- besides yesterday.”

You’d agree, but you were still a puddle with your cheek pressed into the sheets until you let yourself plop on your side after he pulled out. You felt so high. You laid there for a moment as he took off to the bathroom. He was in there a while, so you decided to get dressed in your clean clothes that he had washed last night that resided in his closet.

You were in disbelief, your hands were shaking as you pulled on the clothes.

Did he mean it?

It had only been three days since he held you in that parking lot as you cried. You remembered the hurt you felt when Jin had seen Jin cheat on you. It was the kind of hurt that left a scar on your soul. You were afraid.

Jungkook was so beautiful and so kind and you had fallen hard, too hard. You didn’t even know anything about his family or where he grew up or if he had ever had any pets or his favorite color.

Your mind was spinning, you were freaking out.

You slipped your shoes by the door on and began unlocking it.

“What are you doing?” 

His voice stopped you for a moment.

You thought about lying. You couldn’t lie, but you sure as hell couldn’t face him.

“I-I think I should go.” You stammered.

“Can we talk? Was it something I said?” 

You could hear his footsteps slowly come closer as if he was trying to approach a scared baby deer to keep it from darting away, and that’s exactly what you felt you were.

“What was it I said? The Jin stuff or the I love you?” 

You could tell his brain was doing whatever it could to piece together why you were leaving.

Just hearing him say the words again shredded you apart.

You felt your eyes welling up.

“Hey, hey look at me, please.” His voice was gentle and now coming from behind you. You couldn’t ignore him, not when he sounded so sweet. You faced him and his eyes scanned over the tears slipping down your cheeks.

“If you didn’t mean it that’s okay, you don’t have to right now. I won’t say it again if-“

“I did mean it.” Your lip quivered “I’m just so scared.”

You watched as his eyebrows furrowed at your words while waiting for you to explain.

“I was just hurt and…”

“If you don’t want to do this-I-I knew going into this that you were hurt, and trying to heal and a relationship might be too much for you while… it was selfish of me to-”

you cut him off by shaking your head.

“no.” you sniffled “I want you, I'm just afraid of being hurt. If I was hurt this badly by Jin, I can't even imagine how badly you could hurt me.” 

His big eyes stared with crinkled brows at you for a moment until he wrapped his arms around you.

“I swear I will never ever hurt you. I will never do what he did to you. Never.” 

Your teary cheek pressed into his neck as you breathed in his calming scent. “I'm so scared of being hurt too, I know how you're feeling. I thought you would end up going back to him and I would lose you. So many things that could make you not want me and so many ways this could go wrong keep running through my head. Please remember what you said, we're here now for each other, it's us against the world. Please please please don't leave me.”

You felt his cheek rest on the top of your head.

“I won't. I'm so sorry. I don't know what I was thinking, I'm so sorry.” you sniffled with guilt and let your arms snake around his torso.

His form was becoming so familiar to you now, his scent already smelled of home, perhaps it did from the moment you had first let him hold you. Perhaps you were all his from that very moment in the parking lot, perhaps you both belonged to each other all along and just didn't know.

“I love you,” you spoke the words first this time, you felt no fear about it.

“I love you too, so much.” his hands slowly rubbed your back as you felt him kiss the top of your head.

You closed your eyes and took it all in, just you and him. You wished at that moment that you could go back and do it over. You would've picked him over anything else, and you knew you'd be so happy if you would've.

“Thank you for not letting me go.” you pulled back and looked into his eyes. “I could've really messed up just now.” 

He gave you a heartfelt smile.

“I hope you would've come back, I’d miss you a lot until you did. We're supposed to be together, you know.” he raised an eyebrow at you.

“Oh yeah?” you couldn't help the smile that spread on your face.

“Mhmm. I have proof.” he lifted a hand and held it up fingers spread. “Give me your hand”

You thread your fingers through his and he let your held hands fall at your sides.

“Now close your eyes.”

You did just as he instructed and felt his forehead rest against his.

You had just had sex but any time you were this close to him made your heart pound so hard. It was as if he had unintentionally trained your body to do this for him.

“Do you feel it?” he whispered “Do you feel that feeling in the pit of your stomach telling you that you'll never love this hard again?”

You had. You had and that's what has scared you so much.

“I do,” you whispered back.

“And can you see it? I can. I can see us moving together to the place you've always dreamed of. You'll get mad at me for being so messy but I’ll just admire you even if you're yelling at me.” 

You felt another small smile on your face as you imagined his words.

“I'll still love you even if I'm upset at you for being messy.” you let out a small breath of laughter.

“I know you will. We'll love each other no matter what because we'll be good to each other, we'll always be there to catch each other. You have absolutely nothing to worry about. Please believe me. I'm yours.”

You felt him kiss your cheek softly and you have him a nod.

Your soul felt so at ease. He had calmed your pain once again.

“If you're losing your mind in here we could just go for a walk you know.” he chuckled.

“Let's do that.” you agreed to it, knowing that he was about to take you out on another adventure.

You laid in his lap and looked up at his jawline. He was playing a video game, but it was fine with you as long as you got this view. He would occasionally run his fingers through your hair or readjust the flower in it that he had picked and stuck in it during your walk earlier.

Sunset was pouring through the sheer curtains making his skin look so golden. You loved the way he looked at this hour, his appearance matched his heart. You felt so warm and loved even when he wasn’t directly giving you his attention. Jungkook’s cup was always overflowing for you when you were used to only a cup half full. You, yourself, had always offered a full cup, but you never got the love you had given back.

“Do you think we’ve earned each other?” you asked as you looked up feeling the urge to kiss every piece of his jaw.

He paused his game and looked down at you.

“I do. I think we're very deserving of one another… Well, I have thought you were always too good for me, but we're both deserving of the love for each other.”

“You thought I was too good for you?” you broke out into laughter. 

“Don't laugh, I still think that.” he was serious.

“Nooooo no no no.” you shook your head. “Why would you think that?”

He shrugged.

“Well don't think that.” you sat up.

“Sometimes it's hard not to, look at me, I'm jobless right now and you're self-made. I live in a gutter with a mattress on the floor and you-”

You shut him up by pressing your lips to his and bringing your hand up to his cheek.

“I don't care about any of that,” you told him.

“I'm going to make sure we live a good life.” 

“I'm pretty happy with you fucking me on this mattress on the floor and we can live the rest of our lives this way, I don't care.” you had to drive the point home for him. Having a good life for you wasn't about what he had to offer, but the beautiful way he lived it, you didn't want that to change.

He crashed his lips into yours now and sent you backward. Your tongues met and lashed together and suddenly your hands were all over each other.

“I love you,” he mumbled into your lips as you tried to peel his shirt off.

“I love you too,” you replied as his hands pushed up your t-shirt and bra.

His lips went right for your nipples and the feel of his tongue and teeth mixing on the nerves made you arch your back into his mouth. You were once again getting high on him.

“I want you to fuck me and cum inside of me.” your mouth spouted off.

He moaned against your breast and you swear you felt his body shiver.

His mouth popped off of your nipple leaving it cold and wet.

“Fucking marry me,” he demanded before his mouth went to the other one.

At that moment you would. You wanted that, it sounded beautiful to you.

“Please. Let's do it. You want kids?” 

“Mhmm,” he replied as his teeth tugged at your perfect bud. 

“Fuck let's have kids.” 

He sat up between your legs and began undoing his belt.

You knew there was no way right now, you were on birth control but something about saying it all and imagining the perfect life was really doing it for you right now.

He tugged his pants off only leaving him I'm his underwear before undoing yours and pulling everything down just enough to get his hand in.

His fingers ran over your already slick folds.

“I'm going to do this to you every damn day of my life.”

A knocking made you both freeze.

“Don’t answer it,” you whispered, pulling him into you so you can connect lips again. 

For a moment you both did ignore the knocking until it turned to banging.

“Open the fucking door Jungkook!”

It was Jin. You had never heard him so angry.

“Shit fuck no.” you whispered as you both jumped up and pulled at your clothes so they seemed normal “he knows. How does he fucking know?” you whisper yelled in panic.

“He might not. It's okay, it's going to be okay.” 

“Maybe you should call the police.” you tried to get Jungkook to hear you over the pounding at the door.

“I'll step outside and talk to him. It will be okay.” even looking as scared as he did he was still trying to make you feel okay.

You slipped back into the closet but this time you left the door slightly open and peered through the crack.

You watched as Jungkook answered the door, went to step outside but Jin pushed him back.

“Where the fuck is she?” it hadn't taken long for Jin’s eyes to examine the room.

“Who?” Jungkook was once again playing stupid.

“What the fuck is all of this?” Jin nearly yelled, pointing to the condom wrapper still on the floor and the places on Jungkook’s neck. “I know for a fact your girlfriend flew home just last week.” 

“I don't have a girlfriend anymore, Jin.” you could hear the agitation in Jungkook’s words through his clenched jaw.

“Then explain.”

“I don’t have to.” 

“No? Well, I talked to her and she said she hasn’t heard from you in three days, just like the rest of us have both with y/n and you.”

Your heart felt like it had dropped into your stomach as you now stood there frozen.

“I saw you taking photos, you didn't even try to help get the girl off of me, you just took photos. I know you sent them to her. I know what you've been telling all of the others. I know this was a setup. I know you've always been jealous of me.”

“Jin, do you know how insane you sound right now? You need to-”

“YOU KNOW I’D NEVER CHEAT ON HER, I NEVER HAVE!” Jin yelled, “So why were you taking photos?”

“Jin, I saw you kissing the other girl.” Jungkook’s voice stayed calm.

“I didn't want it, she had me pinned, Namjoon had to come to help me. Everyone has told me you've been telling them this isn't the first time I’ve supposedly done this either, explain that!”

“Look Jin, you're the cheater here! Don't come to my house and start accusing me of shit!” Jungkook finally snapped.

“YOU’RE AN INSANE MONSTER, JUNGKOOK! WHERE IS SHE?” Jin screamed as loudly as he could.

“I DON'T KNOW.” 

You noted how easily lying came to Jungkook.

“You know! You know because you set this up, you're a fucking stalker and I've always done my best to protect her from you. You gonna tell her how I caught you following her to her classes in college when you didn't even go there? Or how Hobi found a picture you somehow had of her in your room at your parent’s house? Where is she so I can tell her, I will tell her everything.” Jin was seething in anger with his fists tightly gripped into fists at his side.

You still didn't step out of the closet.

“Fine! Fucking fine! You want me to tell you that I fucked her? I fucked her multiple times! I came inside of her, she told me she loved me. Is that what you wanted to hear?” 

“You're sick.” Jin growled. 

“At least I'm not a cheater.” Jungkook struck right back with his words.

“You ARE! And you're a fucking obsessed freak. I swear if you ever talk to me or any of our friends again I'll kill you!” tears ran down his cheeks.

“You're the one that's fucking insane, Jin.”

Upon hearing Jungkook’s words, Jin dove at him but only managed to push him back a little.

Seokjin was sobbing, he gave up and took off out the door.

As Jungkook closed and locked the front door things were silent.

You still stood in the closet and now felt warm liquid blurring your vision and spilling from your eyes. Your body was shaking.

He opened the closet, taking you by the arm and gently pulling you out.

You covered your mouth to try to keep the break down in.

“I can explain.” 

He didn't deny it, not any of it.

“What's true? You said you wouldn't hurt me so just tell me.” you forced even your shaking voice out.

“Listen, I've never- I haven't felt the way I feel about you with anyone before, and I…”

“Oh my God.” you said as your knees now shook “It’s all true, isn't it? Oh my fucking God.” 

“I-” he went to speak but your body had gone into fight or flight and you walked past him. Your body was trying to protect you by gathering your things, but it felt too late for it to kick in.

“I love you, I always have. I can text her right now and dump her.” he was following you around.

His voice felt so distorted as you felt so out of your own body.

“You haven't yet?!” you snapped at him. “At the very least you could have already done that. If you actually did love me you wouldn't have done all of this! What the fuck is up with the talking anyway?!”

“Please don't leave me, please, I'm begging you. I meant everything I said.” he began to cry now too.

“I didn't!” you were hurting and you wanted him to hurt worse. “I was only fucking you to make myself feel better about Jin! You set this up! You ruined my relationship and hurt me! You're a fucking freak! I never want to see you again!” 

You marched to the door, very aware he had crumpled onto the floor in hard sobs behind you.

You walked, you simply just walked in the chilly night, still crying, your things under your arm. The worst part is that you did love him, you had meant everything you said to him too, but he had planned all of this. You no longer thought of him as golden, but fools gold.

You had no idea how long you had been walking, but you decided to sit down on the side of a curb.

Your hands shakily turned on your phone and texts and missed calls flooded through but you ignored them.

The first thing you did was block everyone's number. You were done, it was over, you never wanted to do any of this ever again.

The next thing you did was book a one-way plane ticket to Hawaii. 

You deserved to be happy, even if, for the first time, it was only you. Your cup had always been full of loving others, but never did you think until now that that cup could be full for only you. You wouldn't ever let anyone take from your cup ever again. What filled your cup was genuine, it was gold while all the rest held only water. 

“Tomorrow is going to be better.” you told yourself.

You weren't happy now, but you knew you would be. You could take yourself on adventures every day, you could put flowers in your own hair, and if you fell down a hill at full speed, you could catch yourself. You promised that you'd never let yourself fall ever again.

#jungkook #jeon jungkook #jeon jungkook smut #jeon jungkook fluff #jungkook smut #Jungkook oneshot #jungkook fluff #yandere jungkook #BTS jungkook #jungkook fanfic #jungkook fic #jungkook friends to lovers #jungkook angst #jeon jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #jungkook x reader smut #jeon jungkook x reader #bangtanarmynet #armywriterssupport

[strawberry-nugget]

𝙈𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙈𝙪𝙨𝙞𝙘 | E.Kirishima x Reader

Pairing: Kirishima/ reader, Bakugo/ reader (mentioned)

Summary: You shouldn't want him and he shouldn't want you, it's sinful and forbidden. But he can't help coming back to you, and you can't do anything but take him in every single time. Until today that is.

Word Count: 3.6k

Warnings: Aged up characters (twenties), NSFW 18+, plot with some p//rn but it's not very detailed, unprotected sex (please use condoms everyone), cheating, casual penetrative sex, jealousy, the seggz is pretty vanilla though

↪A/N: tennis player Kirishima, tennis player Kirishima, idk how I came up with it but I can't get it out of my head, written for @doinmybesthere 's 3k event collab and based on The Hills by the Weeknd, don't be shy to tell me if you liked it, I almost wrote 4k in a day which is unusual for me

5.30pm [Missed Call: Red]

5.31pm [Missed Calls(2): Red]

The bubbling notifications are spamming your phone, each call, succeeding the other in persistence and length, making your phone crawl onto your coffee table in restless buzzing. To your salvation the device is on silent; you're just unable to bear the overwhelming sound of your ringtone echo through the empty walls of your apartment, to let it bounce between concrete like a slimy ball, only for it to hit you on the face with tremendous force.

It's one of those days that you can't answer Kirishima. Too perplexed in the wields of your mind, blaming yourself for this horrendous situation, delivering raw swears at him for simply existing.

You don't know how it came to this nor when was the exact moment things switched. Was it at the party that you met him? Or the thousandth time you took him in and let him ruin relationship after relationship. Either way it was horrible for not only you, but also him, and all the people that have been caught up in the sidelines of this rotten affair.

You shouldn't want this anymore and truly, you don't. You're tired of being the second choice, of hiding behind your little finger, crying yourself to sleep at night, only to put on a sultry face for every time he comes. Once, twice a month.

[New Messages: Red]

Babe, you there?

Read 5.38pm

[New Messages: Red]

Babe I got practice at 8.

I know you're reading those.

Read 5.39pm

[Red is typing…]

[New Messages: Red]

I'm outside btw

A fresh, tremendously sharp wave of anxiety rushes through you at the little notification -it can't be like this again, not today. The thudder in your chest is unbearable, heart too weak to stomach the weight of your decision, fingers too reluctant to type out your response.

He's probably smirking while staring at his phone, not a single care in his head. It's loathing to your mind as you confirm your speculation, shooting a glance out of your window, landing your eyes on his car.

He shouldn't be here.

His thousands dollar car doesn't belong in your urban street, not in your side of the town. And it's so dangerous that he's doing this to see you. You've played the worst scenarios in your head a thousand times, millions of headlines on sites and the news about this; Eijirou Kirishima, on his way to claiming a fifth Grand Slam, caught in affair with university student.

Atrocious, degrading, exposing. A hit to his career that would bother the media for a couple of weeks and paint your name in mud along the way.

Why can't he just be content with the model that he's with? You're nothing like her, not as pretty and you don't have her body, you don't have her face, but he still says he finds you better, says he knows you better, but he just can't be with you.

[You]

Can't do it today

Sorry

You're good to yourself, only when you deny him and only when you feel the satisfaction of being the one to do so. It's pointless to sulk over saying no. He can go fuck other girls, play with their hearts and leave you to your otherwise peaceful life. Even if it is just for today.

You don't have the chance to let a smile creep to your face when your doorbell rings. The jiggling sound bursts into your eardrums once and twice, three dreaded times and they're enough to make your stomach churn, your neck tight and your skin ache.

You contemplate on opening the door for him, subconsciously letting yourself feel like a vulnerable prey, who, after running away to save yourself, is choosing to walk into the wolf's den, so willingly that you can feel yourself drifting away with each step you're taking towards the door.

"Babe,"

The swing of your door handle, the crack of your wrist, the creaking of your door as it opens to reveal him; they're all embarrassing. You can't tell if they fall short on his ears, too caught up in the way he looks -all swollen muscles and tall legs. You're running out of courage to say no and he knows this.

He's not as innocent as this cheeky smile frames him out to be, he's not the sweetheart everyone wants him to be either.

He's Eijirou, who's selfishly standing on your door, who's barging his way in your apartment, who's grabbing your cheeks and slamming your face in his, biting your lips until he draws blood, just to punish you for standing up against him.

Your door is slammed behind him, one bend of his knee and it's falling into its rightful place. To shield the sins of your affair, to bring you comfort and privacy as he attacks parts of your neck, your chest. Places that only squeeze perfectly under his touch.

"Babe," He calls again, in between soft kisses. "What's gotten into you?"

You frown and try to look away, past his cocoa colored orbs, past the swelling that's taking over his lips -and yours- with a numbing, tingling sensation.

"Eijirou—"

"I don't have much time in between training, I got a game the day after tomorrow."

It's always like this, you know. He doesn't have to tell you twice or try to excuse his own self for what he does or how he acts. You're pushed between schedules, or slammed into his timetable like a truck when he feels like indulging with you again, hidden between the lines of his free time.

You're sure at this point that it's the thrill he's after. The sinful taste of your lips on his, how he feels in control while chasing after you, when you can't keep up with him.

His lips don't taste like sour cherry anymore, but you let them wiggle against yours with triumph, you let him want to catch his breath as he pulls back and you put the minimum effort in returning the passion you receive.

You pull back, ignoring the words he's whispering against your face, only to take in his features once again.

Soft black hair pulled into a low ponytail, spiky bangs that fly all over his face and his tips drowned in a fiery, foxy red. The only reminder for who he was before his tennis career blew up. For who he was before he turned into this cocky womanizer whom you're desperately after with a longing heart.

"I'm just not in the mood today."

"Well let's get you in the mood then huh?"

He smiles, nose scrunching and chapped lips hiding behind his gums as his hand moves to your thigh, tagging your shorts with furry. As if he's desperate to have you, right here and now. As if bending you over the couch will help put out a fire in him. That's how he always convinces you to keep this going.

He's making you feel like not having you this way is insufferable.

You're buried in the crook of his neck while being pushed onto the couch, nibbling a soft spot that you've found, rubbing his skin on the top of your tongue. You know how to do this without leaving a mark, you can hold back from wanting to take all you can get from him.

But today it's different. It's going to be the last time.

It's not like any other time you've told yourself that you are going to end this. Today you're going to leave a mark, you're going to bite your way into his skin and drink from his poison -the intimate attention he's only ever willing to give- and you'll get drunk in it.

"Fuck," He grunts against your lips. "Fuck, don't stop that feels good."

You don't stop, eager to listen to him, to breathe into his neck before you wrap your lips a little lower and closer to his collarbone. You should be asking if this will cause him problems, but gone is the guilt that veils your coinsense otherwise. You suckle on a spot and then another, stealing his groaning moans one by one as they fall from his lips, plushing them softly in a spongy part of your brain, where they can rest forever, until you've forgotten them.

"Get your shirt off Eijirou," You plea, ogling eyes watering from the pressure that's applied in the apex of your thighs and he's quick to follow your command, lips curling upwards in a sweetheart smirk.

You're going to miss the way the apples of his cheeks cover his eyes when he smiles like this. But there's no going back for you and him.

With legs that feel like burning rubber you hug around his horse, watching the way his muscles flex and fold with his snappy movements. His shirt, tousled and wrinkly, tossed in an unknown corner of your living room, only for him to guess where it is after he's gotten his fix of you.

Thick fingers probe at your sides, pulling your shirt downwards in a silent plea, take off your shirt, give him the satisfaction that he wants, indulge into this as much as he wants you to.

But today, you're not in the mood for this. So instead of pulling your shirt off, you unbuckle your pants, pulling them down at the most dreadful speed, making him bite his lip impatiently.

You won't miss this, the way he's expecting so many things of you.

And if he notices something's wrong, he doesn't say a word, presumably content with getting what he wants; the rear view of the gap between your legs, where he can bury himself and get lost for the next thirty minutes.

"Fuck baby," he moans. "Why do you smell so good?"

You grunt, averting your gaze from his as he pushes your bangs away from your face with the back of his hand. You want to miss his puppy eyes. Ghosting him won't be easier for you if you don't.

But damn if he couldn't read you this well, things would be easier.

"Not in the mood to talk?" You look even further away to avoid the question, "babe, you can tell me if you're not well, you'll feel better if you let it out"

You don't need someone to tell you how to feel. You've decided when the two of you are going to be through. It's set and done, even if he feels at the top of the world right now, you won't inflate his ego anymore.

"M fine Eijirou, put it in," You bite his lip, putting huge effort in making him forget about what he thinks it's bothering you. "Want you to put it in m'kay?"

Sultry, fake voice, he's heard it all before and he doesn't have the right to call you out for it. Whatever he does next, you're his for the moment and for the last time.

Repeating is your rightful way of convincing yourself of not giving up on your decision. If only he could have broken up before deciding to wet himself in you, if only you hadn't taken him so eagerly, if only you hadn't become just like him. Welcoming him despite availability status, afraid to lose him, saying that a little sex wouldn't hurt. If you could do this on repeat, then you could get rid of him quite as easily.

You're not better than him and he's taken your vulnerability to him for granted. He's loved the attention you've paid him from time to time, whenever he's given you so much as a mere call.

You should pretend to moan, to hurt his ego, but as he's delving into you, slowly, mellowy, his kisses feel like burning sunshine, August breeze against your skin, kissing your shoulders lightly. It hurts that this salvation is coming from his mouth, as it moves rhythmically against every inch of you.

"Fuck, fuck, ah, you feel so good, you know that?"

You don't answer, nor do you wrap your lips around him. You don't move them against his when he goes to kiss you, but you coo into his warm embrace once his hands come to cradle you in a tight embrace.

"I love you," He slips up and you contemplate on whether you have to start hating him from this very moment. "I just wanna be with you, I—" He grunts. “—this is why you don't believe him, but nonetheless you hold a moan in as well. "Fuck, I'll break up just for you.”

Now that's a new one. A new addition to the long list of red flags you have with his name on top. You can't fall for it. You absolutely can't. If you do, he'll treat you just like this, he'll fuck behind your back and kiss you goodnight before going off to sleep with someone else. Like he's slept with you, once, twice, thrice.

And you're going to hate being the one who's fooled, despite deserving it more than anyone else. And another girl, or guy, is going to be his subject of desire.

You shouldn't want him to be yours, but you're lewding your 'I love yous' out of your mouth like they're nothing, poisoning your heart until there's nothing left but dust and sucked up blood, all devoured by the greed he's made you feel.

"You love me too?"

"I do," You cry, rocked between him and the couch, neck hurting by the way he's digging his teeth in yours.

"I'll fucking leave everything for you babe,"

He shouldn't. He won't. You tell yourself he's only saying this because he wants to come, to make you feel dirty with his actions and fish out words that make him ecstatic or send him over the edge from your mouth.

Rhythms are peaking, his hips burning from his movements, foreheads are dripping in sweat, lips taste salty against each other. The perfect picture, the most tingling sensation, and you're too fucked to go back, or keep yourself content with him. It feels the same as the last time, a numbing knot in your stomach, commanding you to rip your heart out and throw it away, spooning mewls out of your mouth.

If you could, you'd mute him, not wanting to listen to how beautiful he sounds as he's coming down from his high. If you could, you'd look away, and wouldn't try to burn the image of his body as he's falling apart in your mind.

"That was—" The sigh that leaves his chest through his mouth is liberating, you can tell—"amazing. I still love you, so much babe."

His hand soothing the pain of his thrusts, does nothing to make you feel better. You want to shove it away, but you don't, unhappy with the way you're turning out to be.

"It's time for you to go, Eijirou, isn't it?" You remind him. A hand pushing him off of you and quickly smoothing your T-shirt over your legs to deprive him of the view that'd make him wear a smug of triumph.

"So quick to get me to go. Did you find someone else again sweetheart?"

You don't reply as you're putting on your underwear and pants, shoving his shirt into him with a heavy hand.

"You did, didn't you?"

"None of your business, go off to your practice, your girl, don't patronize me anymore."

He gruffs, beautiful features scowling in that stormy gaze that reeks of his authority, "Here I am pouring my heart on you and you found someone else"

"Eijirou, it's seven thirty, if I were you, I wouldn't be late for practice. You got a game the day after tomorrow."

No more dealing with his pouting, you're going to bawl your eyes out if you have to do it. The sooner he's out of your house, the sooner you'll get this over with; the tight lamp in your throat, the image of him smiling at you like this, him admitting feelings that he shouldn't have.

Hurting him isn't the role that suits you. Because you can't do it. You can't hurt that warm sunshine he has on his face. He has to be the one to hurt you like he's been the one to drive you away. It's too late for him to change or reverse your roles.

You don't want to fight and he knows it.

He knows you, so well, well enough to use you as he wishes to, letting you believe you're using him too. You're going to make him watch you slip away, and he won't do anything about this.

So he's eager to leave as you're pushing him out of the door, he doesn't cup your cheek with his hand, and doesn't kiss your forehead tenderly like he always does.

"You should come to this party Mina is throwing, let me meet your new guy."

Like hell you'd ever do this, he knows, but teasing won't hurt a bit. Eijirou can deal with you dating other men, he's claimed you well before, he'll do it again if he has to, especially now that he's decided to have you.

"Yeah yeah, and if I do, don't ever call me again, 'kay?"

You're too good to not do as he says, or not to fall back to him, and he's too good to not come back to you. To him, you're a match made in heaven, to you, you're a lost cause, burning in the fiery pits of hell as atonement for your sins.

He doesn't know that you'll fall apart before dressing up, how you'll tell yourself you're not doing this for him, but as a statement against him.

You're no better than him, in fact, you're worse.

…

The only problem is, that when Eijirou pulls up at Mina's party after practice, you're already there. Drink in your hand, flared jeans hugging your legs, layered tank tops that cover the bruising truth of this evening, laughing at whatever your friends are saying.

When he puts out his phone, calloused fingers furiously typing a text addressed to you, you're too far gone into another glass, dancing a little dance before grabbing everyone's cups to go for a refill, greeting them in that silent way of yours, drunken smile.

And then you'll pass him by and blink at him, you'll mutter a small greeting and he'll grab you by the hand and whisper in your ear just how hard he'll take you driving the night. You'll swoon, moan, forget about the drinks and follow him anywhere he leads you.

That's how everybody knows about the two of you.

This time, though, you don't cast a single eye on him. In fact, you're tainting him, walking past him while ignoring him, leaving him awestruck and hurt, like his confessions earlier in the day meant nothing to you.

It's a hit to his heart, how your jaw drops as you bump into Bakugo over the kitchen counter, eyes too wide at the sight of him. How your finger dances playfully on his chest and as you smile at him when he whispers something in your ear.

It's infuriating how you drop the cups near the sink and follow Bakugo outside, or how the blond waves at him with a pressed smile against his lips, signaling that he'll be busy for a while.

His insides churn, tummy aching in a feeling of guilt, one unlike anything he's felt before. Losing you doesn't taste in the way he thought he would, it's worse; sour and poisoning. It makes him flee the party, furious and bitter.

When he's back, his body is heavy, feet dragging him across his apartment, mind blank as he follows his basic routine before bed time, fixated on how easy it seemed for you to just ignore him and flee with one of his friends as soon as he came over to the party he invited you to, wondering how you could be so ruthless with him all of a sudden.

Sweet talking Kirishima with a smile of gold, the sweetheart of the professional Tennis scene and you're over him in the split of a second, pushing him away from you without an explanation or heart wrenching speech. Not giving him the satisfaction of some closure, just forcing the cold tempo of your sudden departure in the depths of his heart.

He pays no mind to the girl that sleeps beside him, back turned to him like she's oceans apart, despite the unspoken bound that's keeping them together. He'll leave her, make up for all the damage that he's done, in any way that he can manage to.

It all comes down to the fact that no one can love you like he does, no one can want you like he does. Someone can do it better, but you have to want him.

5.30am [Missed Call: Red]

5.31am [Missed Calls(2): Red]

[New Message: Red]

Fuck, with Bakugo out of everyone?

Delivered: 5.31am

[New Message: Red]

Did you have sex with him?

Babe answer me.

Delivered: 5.32am

[New Message: Red]

I'm breaking up with her tomorrow morning.

And I'll come over.

Babe.

Babe please.

Delivered: 5.33am

[New Message: Red]

I'll take you on a date and we can talk about us okay babe?

Let me know when you wake up.

I love you.

So much.

Delivered: 5.38am

Read: 10.23pm

[You]

(Attached Image)

Sorry 'Red' even if you sound like a total douche, cheeks forgot her phone at my place.

I bet on her answering your late night drama when she takes her phone back.

[Red is typing...]

Super thanks to @celestidarling for proofreading this and giving me the biggest pump of confidence to post

↪Up Next: Dragon King Bakugo

#eijirou kirishima #kirishima x reader #eijirou x reader #eijirou kirishima x reader #kirishima x you #bnha #kirishima x y/n #bakugou x reader #Kirishima #mha fanfiction #mha #bnha fanfiction #kirishima fanfic #tw: cheating #kirishima smut #bnha smut #mha smut

[insidetheravensmind]

𝐒𝐞𝐨 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐛𝐢𝐧 𝐚𝐬 𝐚 𝐘𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐞

Pairing ~ Yan! Changbin x Reader

Genre ~ yandere, smut, fluff, angst

!!trigger warnings!! Lots of smut, unprotected sex (you mfs better be safe), creampie, face fucking, blowjob, sex itself, hands and knees position, mentions of murder and life ruining events, yandere acts (obvi), Stockholm syndrome, master nickname, domming, subbing, “pet play” (not really, it’s kind of sprinkled in there), and that should be all!

Word Count ~ 2,582

@sugasblunt saw ur comment ;) Requested: Kinda (not entirely) Check out my Stray Kids Masterlist

Support me by buying me a coffee here

—————————————————————

How long has it been since Changbin and you got together? Well, normally someone who's been kidnapped and forced to live with their captor against their will would either be dead or have no idea how many days passed. But you knew. Your three year anniversary is coming up!

You were so eager. December 15th, 2018 was when Changbin had taken you away from your own life to protect you. To be honest you don’t remember much from that time, but Changbin had said you’ve loved him from the start - and he’s never lied to you, so why deny his statements?

All that you knew as of right now was that life had been dreadful before Changbin. Your parents have been dead for years beforehand, and you had been randomly fired from your job. It was getting hard to pay for food and to pay rent and to practically live a functioning life. Soooo, when Changbin took you in, you weren’t really complaining much. In fact, you welcomed him wholeheartedly - though you hadn’t really known who he was. Well - uh - kinda haha.

He did take some getting used to. You were obviously scared out of your mind, but he was kind and caring, warm and gentle. When you seemed afraid, he gave you space. He fed you nicely - the meals that were your favorite, he gave you your own room, allowed you to go outside, and eventually you began to love him. He had shown you the best kindness you’d ever known.

There was one thing Changbin said in the beginning you’d never forget. “I will love you until the end of me, until the end of time, and even then I’ll still love you, but so help me, if you think about leaving me, I will make you regret everything you’ve ever done.” And that scared you shitless, so you did listen.

But that also did turn you on. You were always one to rock the boat, be a bit of brat, and you thought, “Maybe Changbin is a bit kinky”, and while you quickly learned he is, that is not the case when he’s mad.

~flashback~

Changbin had just arrived home, and he granted you permission to go outside. You had gone slightly past your allowed area without realizing. An animal had distracted you. A small deer. You followed it, wondering what it was up to. Next thing you know Changbin is running next to you.

“What are you up to, Princess?” You stared at him. “There was an animal, and it piqued my curiosity.” You smiled, thinking of the pretty deer. “Well, I’m not sure if you noticed, but you’ve stepped out of your area’s limits.” You looked at him with fear while his face appeared stern. “I-I’m sorry, Binnie! I didn’t realize, please don’t be upset, I’m sorry.” You hugged him tightly. “I promise, it wasn’t intentional.” He could tell how truly sorry you were, and how much you begged for forgiveness. “I forgive you. Let’s get you back home. I’ll have to start calling you my little fawn though.” He smiled and you giggled. He held your hand, and you walked back as he lectured you on staying in your proper place to be safe. You listened happily and faced him as you saluted him saying, “Yes, sir!” in a silly way. He smiled at you.

It was hours later, you were sleepy and lying on Changbin’s chest as he read to you a story. When he finished, he asked, “Hey, little fawn, would you like me to tell you the consequences of leaving?” You were a bit taken back by his question. You were scared to find out. “Uhh, if you wanna tell me, then yes I would.” He stopped, took a deep breath, and continued. “If you ever leave me, I will give you every single reason to need me again. I will abandon you, completely, with nothing, and make you suffer until you need me again.” Silence. “O-oh, b-but I thought you l-loved me?” Tears quickly fell out of your eyes, and you began to push yourself up from to run to your room and have time to yourself. But Changbin quickly pulled you back. You were now sitting with your back to him, legs locked between his, his arms wrapped around your torso and held you tightly. “I do, that’s why I never want to have to do those things. Do you understand, my little fawn?” You calmed and nodded your head. “I love you, Bin-Bin.”

“I love you too, Y/N.”

~end of flashback~

It was finally the day of your and Changbin’s anniversary. You were so excited! You did your best to wake up before him so you could set things up. You put on a pretty set of lingerie that was a bright and sexy red. It was a little small, but it made it all the more perfect. Changbin loved your body when it poked out. Your skin pudged slightly from the straps. It was a beautiful lace bra that mostly covered your nipples. The thong matched and connected to cute garters around your thighs. To cover it up, you threw on a pair of Changbin’s black sweatpants and one of his classic black t-shirts. You snuck off to the bathroom and messed with your hair a bit. You didn’t do much, just tidied it up. Then you went to the kitchen where you made some breakfast. It was going to be a truly great day.

Changbin woke up when breakfast was finished, walking into the room in black pajama pants and a lack of shirt. “What’s all this, honey?” You smiled. “Some breakfast. Happy anniversary, Changbin!” You set down two plates of food. “Awww thanks, Y/N.” He blushed and went to hug you. “It smells great.”

You guys stuffed your face full of food, and then went on a nice walk in the woods for some fresh air. It was cool outside, so you put on a big warm hoodie and a beanie. He read you your favorite book on a small bench he placed for you guys. For the rest of the day, you spent talking and reminiscing on the good times that you guys had together. How thankful y’all were to have each other. How you saved each other’s lives.

The real treat was a bit before bed, while you were cuddled up on the couch.

He lied there, you breathed heavily. You were ready to give him the big finale of the night. You leaned in and kissed him with the most passion and fire you had in you, desperate for more. He grabbed you by the back of your neck and kissed you harder. It didn’t take long for him to slide his tongue between your lips and explore your mouth like the times he’d done before - but he was more dominant than he’d ever been. Like tonight there was a special goal for him to achieve.

With more energy being put in, Changbin picked you up and carried you to the bedroom. As he entered, he practically threw you across the room and onto the bed. He walked over to you quickly and turned you on your stomach. As soon as you were still, he roughly grabbed the hem of “your” sweatpants and yanked them off, exposing the lingerie beneath it. “Fuck, you’re so hot.” He grabbed your cheeks and kneaded them like dough before smacking them. You moaned loudly.

Changbin put his arms around your waist and pulled you against him. Then he slid his hands up your shirt and took it off, discarding it and throwing it off somewhere in the room. He gazed at you in awe of your beautiful red lingerie. “You’re such a good girl, baby.” He groaned as you grinded against his clothed member. He shoved you back onto the bed. “And it better stay that way. Now, lie there and be a little patient. I want to retrieve something for you.” So you complied. You heard shuffling in the background and a small jingling noise before something had been bestowed onto your head. You wondered curiously, but then a mirror appeared. You saw on your head a pair of cute fawn ears with small jingling bells connected to them. “My little fawn.” Changbin smiled sweetly, and you turned your head to kiss him. He kissed back happily while taking away the mirror. “Let’s finish what you started, babygirl.” He nibbled at your neck and kissed and sucked on it to make the biggest and purple hickeys. He wanted to see his ownership of you. Everything he worked so hard for. All the people he had to kill, all the strings he had to pull to make your life miserable. So you could be all his. Forever.

“Fuck, Changbin!” You moaned so loudly. His hand travelled down your body and under your panties. He rubbed his index finger around, coating his finger in your slick. “Such a wet slut, all for me, what are you thinking about in that head of yours that has you so hot and heavy, baby?” He teased, adding his middle finger, rubbing around your hole, but never going in. “F-fuck, I’m thinking a-about that big c-cock of yours, sir.” You stuttered, trying to get the words out, so he’ll stop messing around. “That’s what I thought.” He pushes his index finger in slowly. He goes at a fairly slow pace, until he can feel you getting more worked up. Then he adds another.

“C-changbin, please.” He speeds his pace, you were so close to climaxing. “I’ll let you cum, you just have to do one thing for me.” You were aching. “Please, what do I need to do?” You questioned, not being able to contain yourself anymore. “Be my little innocent fawn. Let me absolutely destroy you.” You knew exactly what he meant. A few years back, a little after he started calling you by that endearing nickname, he turned you from an innocent young woman to a dirty slut within a few hours. You noticed quickly how turned on he was, taking away the pureness you once had, the white light fading from your eyes as you begged for him to go faster.

“Yes, master!” You squeaked out. “May I please cum for you, sir?” You almost screamed it with how much you were holding back. “Go ahead, baby, right around my fingers. Show master how happy you are.” And then you released, moaning out in pleasure, high pitched squeaks filling the room while he grunted at the beautiful sounds you made. Before you were fully settled, he had ripped his shirt off and lowered his pants and boxers, exposing his thick cock leaking with precum, bright red tip from lack of touch. He positioned you on your knees, ass in the air, and head into the mattress while he rubbed his cock around your entrance. “M-master, please, make me feel good!” You cried out before burning your head deep into the pillow from embarrassment. Changbin pushed into you carefully, not wanting to hurt you. You had an overdrawn moan while he pushed deeper. “Good girl, taking me so well. I wouldn’t want to hurt you.” As you adjusted, he began to move faster. In a few thrusts, he pounded deeply into you. “Master, you feel so good. Thank you.” you panted out into the pillow. “You’re so fucking welcome.”

He felt you tighten around him. “Is my little fawn gonna cum undone for me? Make your master feel good? Hm?” You squirmed and squealed. “Mhm! Yes, please, master!” He squirmed a bit more. “Go ahead, fawn, let it all out. I own you. Say it.” You came for the second time and screamed out, “I’m yours, master. I belong to you! O-only you!” He came into your cunt after you let out your words, his cock not being able to handle the submissiveness you had for him. He pulled out and you both collapsed on the bed.

“You were so good for me, baby. Took me so well.” He praised you as you moved lower. He was about to question it, but then he quickly kept quiet when you took his cock into your mouth. It didn’t take long for him to be throbbing hard again as you hollowed out your cheeks and took him as far as you could. Your quiet noises made vibrations against his dick as he shivered at the sensation. “Mmm fuck, you have the mouth of an angel.” Your hand reached around and fondled his balls to add more pleasure. “G-god fuck, I’m gonna cum down tiny throat of yours, princess.” He groaned, his hands snaking in your hair and lightly pushing your head further down. And as he pushed your head further, ropes of cum filled your throat as he continued to fuck your face. When he was fully finished, you took him out of your mouth, looked up at him, and he looked back down at you. You had doe-eyes as you swallowed his load down your throat. “Thank you, BinBin!” He gazed at you in awe. “Of course, precious. Let’s get cleaned up.”

Changbin sat up and picked you up, carrying you to the bathroom. He sat you on the lid of the toilet while he began to run a lukewarm bath. He smiled at you as he added the bubble bath mixture. As the tub filled, he stopped the water, and lowered you into it. He sat right behind you. Changbin rubbed circles on your back while washing you with soap. Both of you guys were in the bliss of each other's company, completely enjoying the time you spent together.

After a bit of time in the bath, Changbin dried you off and dressed you in one of his t-shirts. You liked the way they fit, and he liked you in them. He wore his usual - black pajama pants and no shirt. Your favorite view. His absolute toned to the max packed abs looking as flawless as ever. “Goodnight, Binnie. I love you so much. Sweet dreams. Happy Anniversary!” You smiled at him. He smiled back. “One more thing.” You were confused. “Oh?” He sat up and began to kneel on the bed, grabbing something from the bedside table drawer. A box.

“Y/N, will you marry me?”

He opened the box, and a beautiful diamond gemstone shone brightly in the room. You gazed in awe at its beauty, wandering about how something so priceless was all yours.

“Yes, Changbin. I will.”

He smiled and took the ring to place on your finger. You kissed deeply and fell next to each other and cuddled close after Bin turned the lights off. “I love you so much, Y/N. Sweet dreams, and goodnight. Happy Anniversary to my lovely and beautiful fiance.” You guys kissed once more, and fell asleep sweetly in each other's arms.

After all these years, his plan worked. Your parents were killed in a hit and run accident carried out by Changbin. He blackmailed your boss into firing you, and managed to get your rent upped to be almost impossible to pay for in your conditions. Every life failing event caused by him. All so you’d end up here with him, as his fiance, soon to be wife. Now you can never ever live without him.

Not even if you tried.

----------------------------------------

Han Jisung Yandere Headcanon: https://kitsblade.tumblr.com/post/651488976109289472/imagine-han-jisung-as-a-yandere

#seo changbin #stray kids #fanfic #changbin #yandere #skz yandere #seo changbin yandere #changbin yandere #smut #stray kids smut #changbin smut #changbin yandere smut #skz #binnie #binbin

[bakubros-boo-thang]

Disrespected Devil

Wordcount: -4K

Lucifer x F!Reader

Summary: When you disrespect the demon king, Lucifer is forced to say goodbye to you.

Genre: Angst, smutt, slight fluff, but tbh just angst

A/N: So another first. Not only my first time writing for the Obey me fandom (I have a major Obey me brain rot), but also my first time writing angst and I felt depressed after finishing this (which I did a second ago). I love Diavolo, but I needed a reason for the goodbye to happen so even if his dad is the villain, he is the one to execute it... Hope you enjoy this story.

Warning: NSFW, mentioning of being paralyzed I guess.

‘’What’s with Luci today?’’ ‘’He looks more pissed of than usual…’’ ‘’He probably listened to classical music too long and forgot his homework.’’ ‘’Lucifer forgetting his homework will never happen, but if it did he would look like this.’’ Hearing all those whispers during dinner time is nothing new for you. Tonight is different though. You know why he’s mad and you know who’s the blame. But it’s not as if you don’t have a reason to be just as upset. As dinner slowly ends you know there is only a small gap to avoid a situation. ‘’Beel, how about we go bake something for later this evening?’’ You say, as you cling onto the huge redhead. You know that food is a trigger and you know that this is the way to hide from HIM. ‘’Alright, sounds delicious!’’ He doesn’t seem to notice the way you hold onto him for dear life and the same goes for the others. Clearly, they’ve gotten so used to you that it’s not even necessary to be by your side 24/7. It’s not as if they know tonight will be the last time they see you. It’s a small moment of weakness and you feel your heart clench by the thought of leaving those boys. It’s enough to make you lose your grip on Beel's arm. Enough to bend over, because it physically hurts to leave them behind and enough for Lucifer to finally notice you and come to your aid. ‘’Beel, I think she ate something wrong. No cake tonight, I will see her to her room.’’

And with that, he scoops you up and takes you upstairs. Of course, your room is not an option. It’s way too close to the other rooms. No place to yell. No, Lucifer’s room is soundproof. Made for his nights spent with loud classical music and also made for the occasional screaming match with one of his brothers. As he enters the room, he carefully puts you down on his bed. ‘’Are you feeling alright, Y/n?’’ He says as he lays his palm against your forehead. The feeling of sadness is gone, already replaced by nerves. You know what’s coming. You know you won’t hold back. Will this be your last fight with Lucifer? The question never makes it to the surface, because the moment you nod your head in ensurement, Lucifer opens his mouth. ‘’Good, because you have no idea how foolish you acted today.’’  As mentioned before this room reminds you of the occasional screaming matches he must’ve had with his brothers, but never with you. Pissing Lucifer off is easy. You’ve done that plenty of times. Even made him show his true form, but making him scream, that is something you never achieved. Still, it is worth the try. Tonight is your last chance. As you get up you take a look at his face. What faces you is the cold expression he usually shows when he’s done with someone’s bullshit. The expression you have already mirrored back to him. ‘’So you are going to ignore me?’’ I’m not going to answer him. ‘’Are you serious?’’ I am not going to say a word. ‘’Should I spell out what you did?’’ Don’t say a thing. ‘’You just signed your death certificate.’’ His voice cracks and even though it’s far from the scream you aimed for. It’s still the first sign of emotion from the man you care about so much. ‘’Diavolo didn’t seem upset by what I said?!’’ You can’t help but talk louder. especially after being silent for the past few minutes. ‘’ As if he is going to kill me? ME?! And ruin the bonds that are being formed with the humans?’’

You can feel the tears in your eyes, this fight might’ve been about you being disrespectful in some way, but for you it was different. All this time getting closer with all the brothers. All this time loving them. All this time being there for them. It made you realize that the only one who made it difficult was him. With every step getting closer to each other; there were always a few steps back. An obsession with keeping up appearance, an obsession over a promise he would keep no matter what, an obsession with being a stuck-up asshole; That was Lucifer in a nutshell for you. And still, you couldn’t help being drawn to him. As a moth drawn to a flame. Even when the flame could easily kill the moth. Just as easily Lucifer could kill you. And it’s not as if he hadn’t tried that before. ‘’Y/n, You disrespected his father. I had to bargain for you to even leave the castle. The first time I trusted you enough to take you with me alone. And this is how you behave? You know what he wanted to do to Belphegor…’’ You know this story is his weakness. The reason he ended up becoming the lapdog of his so-called best friend. Still, it only makes you more upset to hear him say it. Even when you can hear the slightest hint of emotion in his voice; his eyes stay just as cold as usual. ‘’He is your best friend, isn’t he? He is my friend too, right? You always do this Lucifer! You always get mad over things and it never solves anything. You get mad at me for having fun. You get mad at me for trying to help. You get mad at me for trying to get closer to you. You don’t share things with me! Maybe Diavolo should’ve locked me up. Might as well get myself killed; it’s not as if you never tried to kill me…’’ Your voice is loud as you speak, but his silence is louder. He just stares at you and then it happens.

It’s not that you’re scared you’ve seen his true form before. It’s just as beautiful as him, but it’s also something that happens when he’s full of rage, just as that one time he tried to kill you. You can feel yourself freeze under his gaze. You can feel yourself moving away from him until you reach the headboard of his bed. Still, he moves closer. Until his lips are inches away from your ears. No screams, only whispers; what a way to say goodbye. ‘’DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA OF WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON?!’’ You are so shocked by the volume of his voice, the bass it carries, that it takes some time to realize he has more to say. Your ear is beeping as he moves his lips away and locks his gaze onto you. ‘’DIAVOLO IS NOT THE FUCKING PROBLEM, Y/N, HIS DAD IS. YOU INSULTED THE KING OF DEVILDOM IN FRONT OF HIS SON AND MULTIPLE WITNESSES. DIAVOLO CAN’T DO SHIT ABOUT THAT.’’ Only now do you notice the way his hands are gripping your arms; The way his expression has changed from cold to almost desperate. ‘’That guy has only been able to do what his dad wanted. Our friendship is real, but if his father told him to kill me, he would do it without hesitation. Do you really think he would think twice about killing you? IF HE WOULD KILL ME -HIS BEST FRIEND- IN AN INSTANT?” You notice the tears in his eyes. Lucifer is screaming and crying, but this isn’t a win. Before your heart breaks again, his arms are around you and his face is hidden in your neck, but that doesn’t stop the words. ‘’I had to send you away. I had to be cold. They know I care about you, but not to this extent. I had to pretend it was for the sake of the bonds. After you left I had to beg on my knees for your survival. I had to beg. The avatar of pride begged someone on his knees. It was all Lillith over again…’’

There is nothing you can say to fix this. It might’ve slipped your mind while you were there. But you were surrounded by royalty. What might’ve seemed innocent for you, was clearly a lot for them and now you had to leave everyone you loved behind. You can feel the tears fall from your eyes. “I’m sorry Luci, I truly am.” It won’t help, but it’s the least you can say as you look up into his eyes. He is still in his true form, but even with his wings all spread out, he has never looked more vulnerable. There is a sad smile on his lips as he caresses your cheek. “I know you are, you fool.” He says with no trace of the rage he had before. “ I don't want to leave you all…I don't want to leave you!” You know that you sound like a small child that already knows he lost and that’s exactly what you feel like. “It’s too late for that now, Y/n. Diavolo gave me tonight to say my goodbyes.”  You try to distract yourself by focusing on his raven colored wings. “So that means I can’t say goodbye to the rest…”  The pain is back. Never being a fool with Mammon, never dressing up with Levi, doing make-up with Asmo, reading books with Satan, eating with Beel or sleeping with Belphie.  You can’t help but grab your chest again. “Are you okay?” Lucifer is supporting you within seconds as he asks the question. “No I’m not, but atleast I get to say goodbye to you.”  And as you look up he leans in and gives you a tiny peck on the lips. “I’ve wanted to do that for quite some time.” He lets out. You can’t help but smile as you pull him back towards you. “Let's make it a proper goodbye then.” You whisper as you pull him back to your lips.

It’s not like it’s your first kiss with Lucifer, but it’s the last and that’s what makes it so much more special. It’s the combination of mutual sadness and desperation, the hint of rage still brewing somewhere deep inside the both of you. He knows your body, the way it will arch when he pushes you all the way down onto the bed. The tiny gasps when he starts kissing your neck. The way you look away when he starts kissing all the way down your body. ‘’Please keep looking at me, dear. I want you to see how much I am going to miss you.’’ It’s enough to make your heart flutter, the way he starts to attack your core with his tongue right away. It’s obvious he is in a hurry, but even with all the sadness, it’s the best way there is. You can’t help your moans; You’re lucky his room is soundproof. He’s fast, maybe too fast, but with everything that’s going on, it’s the best you can get. And that’s what it is. The best, because within a few minutes you can feel yourself starting to reach that point. The knot in your stomach tightens. your hands end up in his hair and with one loud moan, you erupt around him.

‘’I know that Mammon claims he was your first… in multiple ways… and not to discredit my brother, but I intend to be your last in all of them.’’  He says as he looks at you while he licks his lips. Him saying those words, the way he just made you lose your mind. It feels good, after all the fighting, teasing, kisses and losses , you’re with the man you love. You don’t want to ruin the mood. You’re really trying, but the moment you hear yourself thinking about loving him, about leaving him, about leaving his brothers, you just break. The tears start to form in your eyes and as you try to wipe them away you feel something on your arms. Lucifer. His eyes are cold again as he moves up to face you. ‘’Don’t hide your tears. I am just as sad.’’ He takes a long look at you, lets out a sign, and lays next to you as he caresses your back. ‘’I don’t want to play the ‘’Who has it worse’’ game, truly, I don’t want to, but in all the years I’ve been in heaven and hell, you’re the first human to have ever make my blood boil. Both from nerves and anger nonetheless, but losing you. Losing the one that made my family whole, the one that makes me feel all these emotions, the one that I love, hurts.’’ You can’t help but raise your brow. when he notices your expression he lets out a laugh.

You feel his hand grab your chin and suddenly your lips are only inches apart. ‘’I know you love me, Y/n. I’ve always known. Falling for you, was what surprised me.’’ You can’t help, but roll your eyes at him. Trying to ignore the way his hand feels on your back. The way it slowly moves it’s way to your hips. ‘’You know I do love all your brothers quite a lot too…’’ You say with all the confidence you have left. ‘’I know you do, but still I am the one that has you laying here. Practically begging for more.’’ He let’s out a chuckle as he pulls you closer. ‘’Let’s end this conversation, there’s not enough time.’’ And with that he’s on top of you. You know there isn’t much time, but when he starts to unbotton his shirt it’s as if time slows down. Of course he notices your looks and can’t help to give you a sly smirk. ‘’Don’t worry your next.’’ Is all he says as he takes his shirt off and starts tugging on yours. After your shirt is taken off he takes a look at your body and all you see is adoration on his face. ‘’I want to see all of you.’’ It makes your body flutter. ‘’You’re absolutely breathtaking.’’ He whispers. All this praise makes you feel weak. You try to grab his face, but as you put your arms up they fall down. You feel weak. Not because of his words, but something else. You see Lucifers expression change, the adorations is switched to concern, then back to concentration and before you know it he scoops you in his arms and makes you straddle him.

He’s looking at you, but not really. Obviously talking to himself. ‘’He wanted to be sure…’’ And as he says it he’s back. Back to giving you a sad smile. ‘’What’s going on?’’ Is all you let out. Is all you can let out, as you feel your body weighing more and more. He notices you getting weaker, making sure your settled between him and the headboard of the bed, before he speaks again. ‘’I think it’s time… Barbatos must’ve cast a spell… something that gave us a time limit. The probably knew it would be hard saying my goodbyes to you. Now I’m forced to make haste, just to make sure you’re safe.’’ You can’t even respond. You can move, but barely and all you can do is watch as Lucifer grabs his shirt. As he moves away from you, you’re sure of it. No this is not the way we’re going to say our goodbyes. It needs to be on our terms. Of course those words never leave your lips, but with all the power you have you reach out to him and as he looks back you let out a: ‘’No...not like this.’’ And maybe it’s the few words you’ve spoken, or the way your arm is trembling from all the power it takes to hold on to him, but he crawls back to you. His face is right above yours and if it’s not your eyes making it obvious what you want, you’re mouth will do. ‘’Take me…’’ It’s not a lot of words, but with the face you’re making and the fact that you guys were just in the middle of it, it doesn’t take much guessing. You can see that he’s thinking about it, obviously worried for you, but you can see his eyes change the moment it clicks.

His wings ar still there and you wished you could touch them, feel them one last time, but you should be lucky by what you can still get.’’I used to be a rebel, so why not know.’’ He laughs quietly before he lays you flat on your back.  ‘’I’m going to take care of you my love, promise me to let me know when it’s too much or when you want to stop.’’ You nod your head and you know that your eyes tell him all he needs to know. How bad you want him, how even when you were able to just talk normally, you would want this goodbye to be said only in silence. His body is hovering over yours, his hand touching your neck, giving you goosebumps. ‘’Does this feel nice?’’ he whispers as his hands move towards your breasts. You can only let out a tiny gasp and that tells him enough. ‘’I wish we had more time…’’ Is all he says as his finger enters your core. The moan that escapes you is loader then the both of you would’ve expected. As he continues to stretch you out with one hand, his other starts to prep his cock. ‘’Wish I could… do that for you.’’ You manage to say. You can’t keep your eyes from him. The way he’s hovering over you. His finger inside of you and the way you can’t do anything except for your stares, moans and gasps. ‘’All I want is to feel you right now, my love.’’

And with that he places the tip right in front of your entrance. He makes sure your faces are only inches apart and as he slowly slides into you, his arms make there way to your sides. He’s holding you as he bottoms out in you and the only thing you can do is let out a long moan. He starts moving slowly, tender, putting all his love in every trust. He’s the only one speaking from time to time. ‘’I love you’s’’ and ‘’You feel so good’ s’’ are filling the room. All that praise, all the love in his eyes. The fact that he’s not only literally hitting all your spots, but also the spots in your mind, is what does it for you. You feel yourself unravel under him. You’re so close, that you start to tear up. Your eyes are filled with tears, mostly because of how good this feels, the fact that you’re making love on stolen time, but also because the time is probably running out soon. Lucifer never increases his speed. When he notices your tears he quickly wipes them away and as his hand caresses your swollen cheek he whispers:  Don’t cry, my love, let us enjoy these last moments.’’ And just as he is about to give you a kiss on the lips you whisper a soft ‘’Love you Lucifer.’’ You notice his eyes being red as well and it’s devastating, but it feels so good. the way he keeps a steady pace has you reaching your peak and these final ‘’I love you’s’’, the final kisses is all you need to feel yourself tightening around him. He’s close too, because the moment he feels you tighten around his cock he gives you one firmer stroke and that’s all he needs to cum inside of you. He falls next to you and quickly takes you in his arms. ‘’I wish we could stay like this forever. I would sell my soul… but I guess in some way my soul has already been sold.’’ And all you can do is give him a sad smile before your eyes close.

Lucifer knew that it was time. You were starting to feel cold, too cold. After putting on some clothes and making sure you were fully clothed, he grabbed the coin Barbatos had given him. ‘’Use this before the time runs out.’’ So he had warned him for the curse. He knew he couldn’t be mad at his friends. He couldn’t be mad at you, he could only blame himself. He had shown his weakness by loving you. But you loved his brothers, loved him, despite all he stood for, without any shame. And even with the way it felt like he was going to lose you forever, it still meant the world he had the honor of getting to know you. The moment the coin was thrown a portal started to form and as he grabbed your cold body the darkness swallowed the two of you. As he opened his eyes he saw nothing, but darkness. It took a few minutes to notice that he was in a room. It must’ve been yours, because he noticed a picture of you next to a bed. He was going to take the picture, he was a rebel after all. As he tucked you in, he was at a loss for words. So all he could do was give you one last kiss on the forehead. Not being able to stop the tears falling from his eyes. ‘’Goodbye, my love…’’ and as the darkness was about to swallow him, he couldn’t help but leave one more thing behind. A raven feather, just for good measure. Returning to the Devildom was going to be almost as hard as leaving you here. He was once again going to be the villain in yet another story… the story of how he lost you.

You wake up to sunlight. Too much of it. Why aren’t your curtains closed? Wait, you have to get out of bed, it’s your turn to cook for everyone. Everyone? You live by yourself… right? It feels like you had a weird dream, but you can’t remember it. All you feel is sadness. As if you’ve lost something or someone important. The pain hits you so hard that the moment you try to stand your legs give out and you lay on the ground as tears fill your eyes. It hurts, but you don’t know why. As your hands try to find some grip to get up, you feel something soft. A feather. A raven black feather. It’s weird, but it feels comforting. Before you can help yourself, your lips are already on it and even when you should be grossed out by it, you plan to cherish the little trinket...

#Obey me #obey me shall we date #lucifer #obey me smut #obey me angst #obey me fluff #Lucifer x mc #lucifer x reader #lucifer x you #lucifer x y/n #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me mammon #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me solomon #obey me simeon #obey me luke

[burning-the-write-oil]

Guardian

Summary: Compilation of a few different scenes of Sandor and reader.

Characters: Sandor Clegane/F!Reader

Words: 1.9k

Rating: Explicit, 18+ only

Warnings: swearing/explicit language, indications of intended non-con/r*pe, explicit sexual references, penetrative sex, oral (f), alluded age gap (reader is in 20s), how fucking large Sandor Clegane is

A/N: So I’ve written yet another piece that wasn’t on my list of things I needed to write, but I have an issue with new characters that I thirst over and having an overwhelming urge to write them, so here’s the result! It’s kind of all over the place, but it was an idea I had that only compiled of a few scenes so I just connected them. I hope you enjoy if you do read! Thank you for your support and please like, reblog, and comment if you desire!

Masterlist

           “C’mon poppet, we don’t bite...much.”

Try as you did, there was no possible way to press yourself any closer against the wall in an attempt to distance yourself from the men. You wished you could melt into the wall, become one and get away. Escape. But there was no escape. Three guards of Kings Landing had you cornered, deciding they were going to have their way with a handmaiden they’d found wandering the halls of the castle alone. A bad decision on your part, it seemed. However, you’d made this trek to the gardens before, spending any time to yourself there, should the weather be suitable.

           “Don’t you fools have enough fun at the brothels? Just let me be on my way,” You pleaded, your heart rate increasing at the sneers and laughs they gave.

           “No charge for you, love. Here for the taking. Can’t give that opportunity up, now can we?” One of the guard’s sickly sweet tones made you grimace, trying to push their grimy hands away from your body as they began to reach to pull at your dress.

A sharp strike to your face at your refusal and attempt to escape caused you to whimper as one man quickly turned you and pressed your face to the wall behind you. Tears pricked in your eyes as you tried to call out for help, only to be met with another strike and a harsh tug to your hair. You tried to tune out the murmurs of “how fun this one will be” and “feisty one, she is” as they decided who would have the first go at you.

Tears slid down your cheeks as one of the men ripped at the fabric of your gown, tearing a strip down the back and side just as the sound of someone drawing their sword met your ears. You froze, immediately noticing the hands of the guard leave you. You hesitated to turn around at the proceeding sound of steel colliding and groans of the men being struck, sliced and falling to the ground, slashed with the stranger’s sword.

Silence filled the air immediately after. You reached for the ripped fabric of your dress, attempting to hold it to your chest to cover yourself in some way before turning around, your red eyes meeting the stranger’s.

Sandor Clegane. The Hound. The king’s bodyguard.

He sheathed his bloodied sword, eyes softening when he met yours, carefully taking a few steps towards you. The guards now in a pool of their own blood. You exhaled shakily, eyes remaining fixed on the metal armor that covered his chest as he stood before you. He carefully brought a hand to your jaw, gently tilting your head up ever so slightly to get a better look at your injuries. His thumb barely brushed the mark and the quickly forming bruise from the man who had struck you and knew there were more than likely more bruises to be found on your body. His touch barely pressed your cheeks as he wiped away the falling tears from your cheeks. Less from the fear in the present and more from the events that had just occurred. What could have happened had Sandor not been there.

           “Let’s get you back to your quarters.” He quietly spoke and you nodded with a sniffle, his hand on the small of your back as he led you down the hall.

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           “Aren’t they going to notice the king’s bodyguard is missing?”

           “Fuck ‘em…” He mumbled against your neck, the scruff around his mouth scratching against your skin at the contact.

You smiled, shaking your head slightly at the retort. The rate at which you’d gone from barely touching the man before you to now having his hands on you almost constantly when you two were together was very quick. Your touch, kisses, and affection were now welcomed to Sandor.

           “You’re going to get us both in trouble.” You smirked, starting to run your fingers through the greasy strands of his hair.

He pulled away from your neck with a sigh, shifting you to now straddle his lap from your original position of sitting to the side. He raised a brow, looking up at you.

           “Are you really that concerned about those cunts right now?”

You shook your head with a small grin, tilting your head to press your forehead to his, brushing the tip of his nose with yours.

           “That’s what I thought.” He growled, gently guiding your head with a hand grasping your chin to place more kisses now along your jawline.

You paused for a few moments, appreciating the attention he gave you before speaking again, much to his displeasure.

           “I missed you.”

He pulled away to look up at you, this time not in slight annoyance but to better listen as you spoke.

           “Not easy protecting the little shit and handling his insistent demands. Finding time to come to see you without being summoned isn’t as easy..” He simply replied, eyes searching your face. 

You nodded understandably, brushing the back of your hand along his cheek. You knew he wanted to see you, but you both had to keep up the image that nothing was going on between you two.

           “Guess we should make the most of our time then.”

           “Aye, that’s what I’ve been trying to do since I got here.” He mumbled in fake annoyance and you could immediately sense the playfulness in his tone.

Rolling your eyes, you immediately leaned down to press your lips to his, hands resting on the back of his neck. You loved these moments.

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           “Gods, don’t stop, please!” You whined, doing your best to keep your voice low as your eyes fluttered open to attempt to look down at the man between your thighs, eagerly licking at your pussy as you were laid across the wooden table in your quarters.

Sandor harshly sucked your clit between his lips before pulling back ever so slightly to speak,

           “You keep whimpering like that and I won’t be able to finish. Don’t like people interrupting my meal…” He grumbled, using his thumbs to separate your lower lips and lick a long stripe along the length of your labia.

You bit your lip to muffle the moan that wanted to escape your lips as you were steadily brought to the edge for the second time, your sensitive clit aching at the contact and the wet squelching sounds of his lips and tongue giving attention to your swollen center.

           “Come up h-here so I can give y-you the attention you deserve.” You managed to get out, your body jolting slightly as he removed his mouth from you moments later.

He chuckled lowly, slowly rising from his knees to stand before you, lips shiny with your arousal.

          “You mean so I can fuck you?”

           “Works out for both of us, now doesn’t it?” You raise a brow with a teasing smirk, hands reaching up to pull the top of your dress down even further, baring more of your breasts to him.

He groans, leaning down to drag his teeth across one of your nipples before unbuttoning his trousers and pulling them down to free his hardened length that was now leaking at the tip.

           “You could always have your betrothed do the job for you.” His tone bitter at the reference to the man your father had arranged for you to marry.

That couldn’t be further from what you wanted as he pulled you off of the table, flipping you around to now face the table before shoving you to bend over it.

           “If I wanted a boy to fuck me, I’d be over there right now.” You told him, your body shivering in excitement as he used his knee to spread your thighs further apart.

          “Oh, that’s right. You want a man to fuck you proper… Plenty of other men in King’s Landing, girl.” He slowly dragged the tip of his cock along the length of your slit, coating him in your arousal before pausing at your entrance.

          “Fuck, Sandor! I want you, okay? I want you to fuck me, please!” You practically begged, your hands trying to reach for an edge on the table as you tried to push your ass back towards his hips.

           He chuckled at your pleading, knowing very well that he was who you wanted. “That’s right, girl.”

He thrust into you roughly, his large hands immediately grabbing onto your hips and pulling them back to meet his thrusts. You pressed your mouth to your arm in front of you, trying to muffle the moans that fell from your lips as your body jolted forward with every quick thrust.

           “Such a sweet girl, but like it so rough, doesn’t she? Imagine what your father would think, knowing you let The Hound ruin you.” He growled as he brought a hand forward to gather your hair and pull you up towards him.

You could only whimper in response, mumbling for him to fuck you harder before your lips pressed together in hopes your cries of pleasure wouldn’t be heard past the doors of your quarters.

           “You going to come for me, sweet one?” He grunted as his thrusts slowed ever so slightly, still continuing to plow into you.

           “Yes, please let me come!” You whined, your hands searching for anything to grab on the surface below you.

Sandor’s grunts and growls grew louder as he reached his peak as well, the rhythm of his thrusts beginning to falter.

            “Come on then. Come for me.” He groaned as your walls clenched around him and your orgasm hit you moments later, your head falling to the surface as your body shook, feeling him reach his release not long after you. 

Both your pants and heavy breathing were the only thing that could be heard now and you weren’t sure you’d be able to stand without your thighs shaking. He pulled out of you slowly as he caught his breath and you could feel his release slowly begin to leak out of you. A few soft pats to your ass and he helped you up and over to your bed, laying you on your back. You began to cover yourself with your sheet as you watched him begin to dress.

You wished he could stay but you both knew he couldn’t. Someday, you hoped he could.

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           “Father, please! I love him!” You sobbed, following after him as he departed from the gardens, tears steadily falling from your cheeks and your breath ragged with fear.

           “No, you are betrothed! I will not have you seeing that man anymore. I am astounded at your behavior.” He answered, pausing at the edge of the garden, expression stern.

           “I won’t see him anymore, I promise. Just don’t make me leave, please!” You struggled to get out, eyes pleading as he shook his head. 

           “You leave at sundown and that is final. I will not hear any more of this. You’re never to see that man again.”

Your father strode off, leaving you at the edge of the garden astounded. Your eyes shut tightly as your body shook with quiet sobs. Shakily inhaling, you angrily wiped the tears from your eyes and when you looked up you saw Sandor standing near the side of the castle, a small distance away. You knew he’d heard the entirety of the conversation, you could see the rage in his eyes at your father’s words.

Tears began to fill your eyes once again, his saddened expression one due to your own reaction to the situation. You paused for a moment, watching him, your eyes locked. You knew he knew, but that didn’t make it hurt any less.

It took everything in you to turn away and make your out of the garden, away from the man you loved.

#my writing #game of thrones #got #the hound #sandor clegane #game of thrones fic #sandor clegane fic #sandor clegane x reader #fluff #smut #angst #house clegane