#you ever cry for so long for so many days in a row that you feel hungover | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fum1ku · 17 hours

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TOXIC TRAITS - HQ BOYS

ft. kiyoomi sakusa, koushi sugawara, atsumu miya, daichi sawamura, tobio kageyama, kei tsukishima

tw: toxic relationship, arguments, cursing

pt. 2 where everyone kisses and makes out makes up, anyone?

KIYOOMI: silent treatment. perhaps kiyoomi’s fight or flight reaction stemmed from his inability to communicate well. but, that didn’t feel completely true. he could be blunt; honestly saying what was on his mind to anyone. but, when it came to you, he was just.. silent. you’d beg and plead, scream or shout, say anything and you wouldn’t hear a word back from him. it hurt. it tore deep into your chest; finding itself a resting spot in the pit of your stomach. would someone who truly loved you really do this to you?

KOUSHI: love bombing. sugawara really didn’t mean to. he didn’t know how much he’d ever smothered you until he heard someone actually say something about it. at first you thought it was just sweet, random acts of kindness from him. his love language shining through, at most. the expensive gifts, the rush of compliments he’d give you, the aching feeling of his arms wrapping around you for the 5th time in that moment. but, no—it was more than that. all of it was meaningless; hallow. not a second thought put into it besides his desperation to win you. to have you. he was so desperate to not let you slip away that he forgot what he had ever felt for you in the first place: love.

ATSUMU: toxic jealousy. atsumu miya had been popular with girls since high school. and of course it didn’t stop when he joined the msby jackals. if anything, he had been more popular with women now than he had been in his entire life. but, he always said it didn’t matter. he always told you “you’re all i need. no stupid fan girls can get in the way of that. i have you, and that’s all i want.” all he wants. but that all fades away after your first actual fight. who even remembers what it was about? it didn’t matter anymore. sitting in the bleachers watching your boyfriend prepare for his next match, you could see as a swarm of overzealous girls came running towards him. instead of his usual wave of acknowledgment and turning away to head for a more private area, he dove deep into the attention. he soaked up each compliment from every girl in the crowd with a sly smirk on his face. he accepted every picture he was asked to take; putting his hand around her waist, letting her kiss his cheek or feel his stupid muscles through his jersey. he did all of this knowing you had been there waiting; watching. he did all of this, not feeling a single bit of remorse up till the second he watched as hot tears streamed down your face and you ran out of the arena. shit. he had really fucked up.

DAICHI: overprotective. it was sweet daichi cared. really, it was. he’d place a firm hand around your waist when walking past guys in the street because he knew it made you feel safe. he’d have you sit a few rows back in the bleachers when watching his games “just in case”. and he’d always make sure you made it home safe after work or school. but, it soon turned into more than just those silly protective things. sometimes he made you feel like you couldn’t think or plainly act for yourself. everything had a risk to him; a risk that wasn’t worth taking with you. you tried to reason with him, but it never made sense to him in the way it did to you. he just wanted you to be safe after all, right?

TOBIO: anger issues. tobio didn’t mean to snap. it just.. well, happened. he loved you—he loves you— so much. he never wanted to see you cry; he never wanted to be the reason why you cried. but it had been a long day. practice had left him dead and dry. it had been back-to-back interviews, multiple photoshoots, and so many fucking autographs. today had taken everything out of him. as shallow as all of those things sounded, it was.. overstimulating, to say the least. kageyama couldn’t think of a better word to describe it; to name exactly what he felt. but when he came home and saw you in the kitchen; dishes stacked high, the pot on the stove bubbling over, the heat that overtook every single room in the apartment—he snapped. he lost it. you had opened your mouth to greet him and before you were able to say anything, all of the frustrations from today started pouring out of his mouth.

“fucking damnit. what the hell are you even doing, y/n? it’s a thousand fucking degrees in here with the stove on and it’s boiling over. fucking shit. i’m exhausted and i can’t even come home to have some damn peace in my own fucking house. what the actual hell?” his words burned through his throat, leaving a bitter taste on the tip of his tongue.

you said nothing as you turned the stove off, and walked straight past him.

“y/n—” he stuttered. “i’m—fuck— i’m so sorry. today was rough and i just..”

he looked down at you to see your body shaking; tears streaming down your face. he fucked up.

KEI: lack of communication. that best summed up kei’s entire life. including his life with you. one small argument and he was gone. vanished. nowhere to be found. not until you’d find him in some tucked away corner of your shared apartment. or outside the building during the evening. you could try your best to say something to him—anything—but it didn’t matter. he’d only talk to you on his own terms. but, what he was thinking? what he was feeling? that was a mystery to you. you could pour your heart out to him about how lost you felt; how much of a mystery his emotions were to you even after being together for so long. didn’t matter. he couldn’t piece together a string of words to give back to you. and that was going to be his downfall.

⁂ taglist: none at the moment ! let me know if you wanted to be tagged for anything<3 my requests are always open too !!

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oreoambitions · 1 year

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#you ever cry for so long for so many days in a row that you feel hungover #and it just does not get better #and everyone who has ever told you that it gets better #everyone who was close enough that it didn't just feel like #The Thing You Say #has left you behind #so you're just here crying #and nothing is distracting enough to make it stop #and you're just alone #trying to find a reason to keep going #that isn't momentum #or a reason meant for someone else #you know?#anyway I'm fine #but like #I hope there's an other side to this

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milo-is-rambling · 1 year

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Most of the time I think life is so so good and then I have one minuscule moment of pain again and it’s like nvm I need to die

#you ever have a good pain week and then you can feel your body getting tense again even when you’re trying to be proactive and it doesn’t #help anymore and you feel like a child again I feel like when I first started hurting when I first realized this was forever I feel like #when I would spend nights crying and thinking about how this was my body and this was my life and how it’ll be like this forever #I almost hate feeling good bc I forget how shitty it is when I hurt #like I truly forget that pain is forever when I have a good couple days and then it always comes back and even when it’s not brutal #immediately I know it will get there again.#I’m pmsing and I’m nervous bc I am stressed and I’ll be starting a new job next week and my shoulders are set more forward then they normal #are and ik it’s from driving and stress and sleeping in so many different places but like god how do I stop being afraid of my body #falling apart while im still using it.#I’m preparing myself for the inevitable endo flare. if it isn’t this month it’ll be some other month. how do I explain to a new boss that I #might have to call out a couple days in a row every month bc I’ll be busy curled up in a ball crying or sleeping for two days #how do I explain that I have to lie about how much I can carry and how long I can stay on my feet because if I didn’t I wouldn’t be able to #get a job anywhere #ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh I feel incredibly young and small and my life is short and just beginning and it feels like it’s racing me to the end #I will hurt in some capacity forever. I just have to deal with that. between emotional and physical pain I am hurting constantly but this #last week has been so fucking good and I have to go back to my regular life tomorrow and try to be good and fix myself and still remember to #stretch even when I’m not driving ten hours and it’s just so hard #I hope I take care of myself. I hope I stop hurting I hope I can be happy soon

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fieldofdaisiies · 2 months

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Scars Like Mine pt. 2

“Are we going flying now?” Elia bounces up and down on her chair, then gulps down the rest of her hot cocoa in one big sip. She taps her fingers onto the wooden table, her gaze ping-ponging between Azriel and you.

You reach for your daughter’s hand, trying to calm her a little while throwing Azriel an apologetic look, but he only smiles politely. “Azriel has just arrived here, my love, give him a little break and let him enjoy breakfast with us.”

It has become a natural thing for the three of you. Azriel has come here often in the past months, at least two times a week, to have breakfast with you and then go flying with Elia. Maybe on one or the other occasion, unbeknownst to your daughter, Azriel already arrived the evening before and spent the night with you. Yes, yes, it is true. The two of you have started dating a while ago and you couldn’t be happier.

Elia knows that you are dating, knows that her mummy is suddenly a lot happier, and her days are brighter. Elia loves this, loves to see her mother smile and laugh so much, and loves to have Azriel here to fly with her. He is great at flying and can teach her so many things. She has already learned how to do a turn, a twist and fly a spiral.

It gives you small heart attacks whenever you see those stunts, but you know that with Azriel, and him always being close to her, she is safe and nothing can happen to her, or will ever happen to her.

“It is fine,” Azriel says, “I’m almost done anyway.” He takes a sip from his water, before gulping down the whole glass and rising from his chair. Your gaze follows him, the outline of his strong, solid body, and you pull your lower lip between your lips when memories of the other night fill your mind. It is insane and should be forbidden what his wicked mouth and his hands can do, and you wonder how you got so lucky to have met him.

Not only for yourself. He is not only a god in the sheets. Azriel is everything you have ever hoped for in a male. Kind, caring, charming, wonderful, smart, and he loves your daughter and treats her with so much kindness and fatherly-love (even though she is not his daughter) your heart wants to cry. You have cried on many occasions already, not believing that you actually got so lucky to finally have this amazing male in your life.

Azriel reaches out his hand when Elia jumps up from her chair and starts punching the air. He brushes his scarred hand over your head and smiles when he meets your gaze. “We’ll be careful, I promise.”

“I know,” you smile up at him and place your hand atop his, thumb stroking his marred skin. “I trust you.” You rise as well, and kiss him on his cheek and then pull your daughter into your arms, squeezing her tightly while plastering her face with kisses. “I also trust you, no crazy stunts or twists or spins,” you tell her, knowing it is useless anyway.

In the corner of your eye you catch Azriel grinning at her, knowing that they plan on doing stunts and crazy twists and turns, but if it brings her joy, you would never forbid it. She will be fine you, you know it.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖

“I am flying!” Elia blazes ahead of Azriel, throws him a big grin over her shoulder. She is now onto her third spin in a row, Azriel always close to her in order to catch her if she threatens to fall. She has turned into a great flyer, but Azriel doesn’t fully trust her abilities yet. She is still very young, the muscles in her wings not yet so strong.

She is so fast, and her laughter so radiant it fills Azriel with pure bliss. Seeing her happy, it is so good and knowing how happy her happiness makes you, is all Azriel needs in life. The two of you have made his life so much better – in you he has found a family, one that resembles the one his brothers have and he couldn’t be any happier.

“Look!” Elia hollers and Azriel grins brightly.

“So amazing, Elia!” he shouts to her over the rising wind, showing her thumbs up. She makes another spin and now even Azriel’s stomach dips. She catches herself and blazes away once again. She twirls around Azriel when she changes direction. And then…

Out of the blue, words leave her mouth that nearly make Azriel lose balance, that nearly throw him off his wings and make him slam to the ground.

“Look, dad, I am flying like a bird. I am weightless and free” She makes another twirl, one big swirl around Azriel, grinning from one ear to the other, fully oblivious to what she has just said.

For a few months, he has flown with Elia, many times, more than he can count on both hands, but never has she called him anything but Azriel before. It is hard to catch himself now. Although he never admitted it, he has always hoped for a little family of his own and children. And now…now this might truly become reality.

The rest of the flying session passes too quickly, Azriel is unfocused, distracted but always careful so nothing happens to your daughter, but his thoughts stray, and he finds himself imagining a future where the three of you are truly a family – you and him married, and Elia calling him dad on a daily basis. It is a beautiful dream, so beautiful tears start to burn behind his eyes when he catches Elia in his arms and helps her lower herself to the ground.

She inhales deeply, then tucks in her wings. “I need to tell mummy about flying today, come come!” She tugs at Azriel’s hand, already setting out for your hut, dragging him along with her.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖

You brush the wet sponge over his back, and softly move on to his left wing, careful not to touch the sensitive parts. Leaning in, you kiss the nape of his neck, then carry on to help him wash his back. Elia is already fast asleep, after telling you everything about the flying session while you ate dinner. It was wonderful to listen to her, and you couldn’t stop smiling when she recounted all the swirls and twirls she made and how much joy flying brings her.

The only thing that confused you, how absentminded Azriel seemed during dinner. He hardly added any comments, normally he loved talking about flying with Elia, this time he kept calm, was mostly distracted and you really hope he will open up what has been going on within him.

It is almost as if he can read your mind, because only a moment after you finish your thought, he says, in a voice full of emotion, “Elia called me dad today.”

You stop. Everything stops. Your hand folds over your mouth, to keep the gasp that threatens to escape contained. Tears start to build up in your eyes and then the sponge drops into the water. “Are you–is it–I hope–”

“I didn’t mind,” Azriel answers quickly, having noticed your sudden tension. He turns in the tub, tucking in his wings so he can look up at you. “Actually…” He inhales a deep breath and his eyes close. “I actually appreciated it a lot, and didn’t mind at all. I liked it,” he sheepishly admits. “I have always wanted children, and being with you and having Elia in my life as well has brought me more joy than anything else in my life before. I couldn’t be happier and her calling me dad…it felt so right.”

“It is alright for you?” you ask, carefully.

“Of course!” Azriel turns even more in the tub and places his hand on your knee. “Is it alright for you? She has a father after all and he–”

“He was an asshole and I never ever want her to have anything to do with him. You are the best thing that could happen to her, and I love that she has probably realised that as well. She has never asked for her father, she knows that he has caused us this pain, that her body is marred from fire because of his doings.”

You swallow around the lump in your throat and tears roll down your cheeks. “I couldn’t have hoped for a better father substitute than you. You are everything I could have ever asked for and she loves you.”

“And I love you, and our little…”

“Family,” you finish for him, cradling his face in your hands and kissing his lips softly.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖ ⊹ ࣪ ˖

At first you hear a door open. Azriel is deep asleep, he doesn’t hear it and also not the soft padding of feet over the ground. The bed dips on your side, and you reach out your arms, lifting your daughter into the bed. “Can I sleep here tonight?”

You kiss her brow. “Of course, my love.”

You help her crawl over your, so she can get comfortable between you and Azriel, snuggling up to your side, her face buried in the crook of your neck. Azriel stirs awake, but not completely, he mumbles a few incomprehensible words and then simply curls his arm around the both of you, inhaling deeply before falling right back asleep.

You have to smile to yourself, your heart so full of love and bliss, it nearly bursts out of your chest. And the smile stays on your lips when you fall asleep, the two most important people close to you, in your arms and you know that everything is alright and a bright future is ahead of you.

tags (crossed-out I couldn't tag) : @juulle987 @marimorena06 @danikasthings @younxii@nightcourtwritings @mrofontaine @lunalilyf @whor-3-crux @tired-all-the-time @anni-was-here @ummmmmwat @azbracadabra @j-pendragonx @hollyismentallyillhelp @famousbasementpainter @bsenpai @lena-davina @red-highlady @thesugatoyourtae @azrielsbabyg @aroseinvelaris @moony-thoughts @wrensical003 @cherryjain17 @moonfawnx @crushedcloudsx @devilsfoodcake22 @valeridarkness @azrielscertifiedslut @mulansaucey @cynicalpotato95 @hanasakr @high-bi-andreadytocry @eerievixen @feyretopia @moonlightazriel @randomness-it-is @brekkershadowsinger @eliieee23 @girasoli-e-sorrisi @illyrianvalkyriecarynthian @kennedy-brooke @highladyofillyria @theworthlessqueen @marina468 @topaz125 @illyrian-dreamer @azriels-mate123 @eos-princess @courtofjurdan @a-frog-with-a-laptop @insufferablebookaddict @azriels-mate2 @callmeblaire @lilah-asteria

#azriel x reader #azriel #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #acotar #acosf

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softpascalito · 6 months

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Christmas Baking for Three - Joel Miller x Reader

Summary: You're tired, pregnant, angry and you mess up the cookies meant for Joel. He gets a full blast of your hormones - and still manages to surprise you.

Relationships: Joel Miller x F!Reader WC: 1800 Tags/Warnings: Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Baking, Christmas Cookies, Christmas, Pregnancy, Female Reader, No use of y/n, Fights, Mention of normal pregnancy struggles, Soft Joel (The Last of Us), Nicknames, Kissing, Crying, Joel Miller in an apron Read on AO3 full advent calendar (updated daily)

notes: another lil calendar piece that is also dedicated to steph's winter writing challenge (@toomanystoriessolittletime) with the trope baking <3 i also wanted to mention a very short but very lovely pregnancy piece by SwiggitySwagNightmareStag with peña that i found really inspiring in regards to p characters and how they handle pregnancy. you can read it here! <3

❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️❄️

You swore under your breath as you opened the oven door, only to be met with a gush of heat and the smell of burnt dough. The cookies that you had so carefully prepared, cut out in the shapes of christmas trees and hearts, had taken on a dark brown color, the furthest row from you already smoking slightly.

“Fuck-” With a quick move, you maneuvered the try of burnt cookies onto the sink to let them cool off. Looking at them in broad daylight, it was clear that they were barely edible and in no way as enjoyable as they should be.

You ignored the surge of anger inside of yourself, anger at the oven for being so damn unreliable, at the timer that you’d meant to replace ages ago, at yourself. You’d been too distracted with cleaning up, then being forced to take a quick trip to the bathroom upstairs and getting sidetracked with laundry.

A groan left you at the realization. The laundry was still soaking in the bathtub, abandoned the second you’d caught a glimpse of the clock and realized how long the cookies had been baking for.

Angry tears shot into your eyes. It felt like a never-ending battle between you and your ever-growing list of things to do, to prepare, to keep track of. And this had been the one thing you’d wanted to do for him, to thank him for taking over so many of said things now that you were in your third trimester. Maybe you could start over, hide the failed cookies, to spare your another embarrassment in front of-

As if summoned by your thoughts, the door of the small mudroom bordering the kitchen opened with a creak. Merely a second later and clearly alarmed by the smell, he was hurrying into the room, eyes raking through the kitchen until they landed on you. His shoulders slumped slightly as he took in your form, checking you from top to bottom.

“Are you okay?” Joel's voice was soft, despite him being a little out of breath. You could see the basket filled with firewood behind him. Another task that used to be yours before your stomach had grown too big.

He watched your reaction, carefully making his way around the counter, glancing at the burnt cookies in passing. It was enough to make the tears finally spill from your eyes, rolling down your face and landing on the shirt that was already stained with flour. And the anger inside of you? It had finally found an outlet.

The poor man didn't even have time to brace himself before you started yelling.

“You arent supposed to be home, what the fuck are you doing here?!” He looked taken aback, but only for a moment. Then his face seemed to relax. You didn't want him to relax. You wanted him to be as angry as you were and in as much pain and misery. You knew it was a horrible, horrible thought, but you couldn't help it. You wanted him to have to run to the toilet upwards of twenty times a day, to have him woken up by a human kicking inside of him at the most ungodly hours.

“You said you'd be at work until five! You're not-” Another sob escaped you as the knot in your chest seemed to grow exponentially, “You're not supposed to be here yet and-”

You couldn't find a single trace of anger on his face. Not in the crease between his brows, not in the corners of his mouth, not even in his eyes. All you could find was concern.

“Hey-” Joel whispered, his hands cupping your cheeks. They were cold but you leaned into the touch regardless, “What's going on, darlin? Talk to me, please.”

You hiccuped slightly as you tried to speak, the words fighting hard to not get outside. As far as your body was concerned, there was no point in telling him, in making him a bigger part of your currently miserable experience than he already had to be.

“Burned- I burned the cookies-” You mumbled, “I wanted- wanted to surprise you.”

Your arms finally wrapped around him, your body fitting snug against his, even with your baby bump between you. Joel pulled you closer, one hand supporting your back while the other gently stroked your hair, “Shhh, it's okay. You're okay.”

He held you like that for a while, occasionally whispering words of gentle encouragement into your ear until the sobs had stopped. Then, he nudged you towards the living room, guiding you to sit down on one of the armchairs next to the window. He stayed by your side, kneeling down in front of you as he kept his hands on your legs, gently rubbing your thigh.

“There we are,” Joel mumbled softly, producing a handkerchief from nearby and wiping the last of your tears from your cheeks. He gave you a few more moments of silence before he spoke.

“Wanna talk about it?” You opened your mouth to decline, to push him away and deal with it yourself. It's what you would have done a few months ago. But, as he kept reminding you, you were a team now. No, not just a team. Parents. Soon-to-be-parents. He-was-once-before-but-you-were-new-to-all-this-parents.

“It's just been a lot,” you mumbled, watching as Joel nodded along, soft brown eyes radiating understanding. “And I'm already putting so much work on you on top of your normal duties so I thought- I wanted to do something nice for you.”

Joel hummed quietly, his thumb pressing into your thigh a little, “You do nice things for me all the time, darlin’.”

“I don't. Not with-” You helplessly gestured to your stomach. You could practically see Joel's expression getting a little more serious at that, “Baby, I promise you do. You're here when I come home, right? You fall asleep next to me. You kiss me when you wake up in the morning. Don't need more than that, baby.”

Almost instantly, the tears were back. A thick one rolled down your cheek and Joel reached up just in time to catch it.

“I appreciate you wanting to bake for me, godda-” He stopped himself from cursing, a habit he’d picked up in the last few weeks, with the due date coming ever closer and him insisting that you should at least try to bring up a civilized child. You had a feeling it had less to do with your child and more with the amount of curse words Ellie dropped on a daily basis, but if it made Joel happy, you wouldn't argue against it.

He sighed, “I really do appreciate it. And you know I think your cookin’ is nothing short of magic,” he mumbled quietly. Then he shook his head, his hand wandering to gently rest on your round stomach, “But it's not why I'm with you.”

“Besides, you're already doin’ a whole lot of baking in here,” he added with a small smile, gently patting your stomach and you couldn't help but let out a small laugh.

“I wouldn't exactly call it baking.”

Joel raised a brow, “No, ‘m pretty sure it is. I made a real nice dough, put it right in here, turned up the heat and now I just gotta wait for it to be done.”

“You're such an idiot, Miller,” you offered weakly as you leaned down towards him, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. He smirked against your lips, “If being an idiot gets you to stop crying, I'll do it more often.”

The kiss barely had time to get more heated before you gently pushed back against Joel's chest, “Gotta finish the laundry upstairs.” A small frown built on his face, “We agreed I'd do that. Ain't good for your back, baby.”

“I told you, I've been-” He actually cut you off this time, squeezing your thigh a little to make you fall silent, “Remember what I said? When you told me you were pregnant?”

You raised a brow, “Before or after you almost fainted?” Joel sent you a playful glare at that, causing you to sigh, “You said we were in this together. That you- that you'd be here for it all.”

“That's right,” he mused softly, his thumb still absent-mindedly caressing your thigh.

“Now, let me go take care of the laundry and you take a nap, yeah? You look-” He paused for a moment, clearly trying to find a nice way to say it, “You look real tired, darlin’.”

You drifted off to the sound of clothes being washed in the bathtub in the next room and to Joel's soft humming of a lullaby he’d been practicing. If this works just half as good on our baby, you thought right before falling asleep, we’re not going to half a single sleepless night.

When you wake up, the rays of afternoon sun are filtering through the windows, giving the house the warm glow you like it so much for. Stumbling into the kitchen, you're met with a sight that you've never seen before.

Joel Miller, an apron tied around his front, kneading away on a piece of dough. Your small laughter alerts him to your presence and you swear you can spot the faintest blush on his cheeks as you practically skip towards him.

“If you wanted an excuse to wear that, you could've just said so,” you tease, leaning against the counter as you watch him. Joel grumbles softly but the small smile on his face isn't lost on you, “ ‘bout time you wake up. Wanna help?”

You frown slightly- and then you realize what he’s doing. Baking bread is something you do often, but this isn't that. The cookie recipe you'd been using earlier is placed next to him, the dough looks exactly the same yours had before you’d burned it.

“Figured we both like cookies. Plus it doubles as a Christmas activity and, well.”

You kiss him. Once, twice, only stopping when he forces you to. He's perfect.

You bake together this time, with you showing him how to get the cut-outs just right, him sneaking a few pieces of the dough into his mouth when he thinks you’re not looking. It’s cozy and relaxing and for the first time in weeks, you seem to forget all about the struggles of being a pregnant woman.

You both sit in front of the oven afterwards, you in Joels lap, your bodies intertwined, both watching eagerly as the cookies slowly turn golden. He kisses your head, his nose nuzzling your hair a few times.

“Next time you’re overwhelmed like that?” He mumbles quietly, “Just let me know, yeah? You know I'm here. For you and the little one”

You nod softly, resting your head against his chest, “I know.”

notes: as always, thank you for reading. i adore each and every one of you. if you enjoyed this, feel free to give me an early christmas present by leaving a comment or reblogging <3

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soft-girl-musings · 6 months

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Cry (MK Spring Bingo #1)

Marc Spector x Reader

cross-posted to ao3

tags: panic/anxiety attacks, possibly inaccurate description of an emergency room visit (i don't remember the exact process i borrowed from my own experience bc i was sick… in the ER…), no use of y/n

wc: 1,356

fic summary: Three times Marc told you it was okay to cry, and one time you returned the favor.

A/N: Finally got around to writing something for someone besides jake lockley, bless. once again this is self-indulgent, but if anything hits home for you i'm glad <3 (based on Adam Melchor's "Cry" , which is the most marc-coded piece of music i've ever heard. in this essay i will)

_____________________

The first time came out of nowhere.

Nothing was wrong per se; no major injury or crisis had come up. All you knew was that you were frozen in the corner of your room, hot tears streaming down your face as your mind raced between a million different things.

“Sweetheart, have you seen my–” Marc’s request stopped the moment he saw you frozen in the darkened room, gripping the sleeves of your shirt as you bit your lip so hard you risked giving yourself another reason to cry.

“I just need a minute,” your voice came out trembling and heavy, as if too many syllables would cause the tears to fall with greater force. Not that you knew how to stop them, or how they even started.

Quick strides across the room brought Marc to your side. His warm hands wrapped around yours, cold and losing color from digging into your arms.

Words were never his strong suit; Marc’s a man of few, usually letting his presence and actions suffice. So when faced with consoling you against some invisible threat, he could almost hear the sound of his own heart breaking in tandem with your staggered breath.

So he stood there. Until your fingers relaxed and entwined with his, he stood there until he could guide you to the floor. Arms wrapped around your shoulders, he cradled you as you continued to cry.

“This is so stupid,” you groaned as you wiped your face with your sleeve. “So fucking… ugh.”

“Hey,” he shushed you. “Not stupid. You’re feeling what you’re feeling.”

“But I don’t know why,” you choked out. It was hard enough being so distraught; not having a valid reason for it made everything hurt more.

“You don't have to justify it. Don't have to do anything but just… be here.” A hand to your temple eased your head against his chest. “I'm here, as long as you need me to be.”

This was all the permission you needed to let another rush of tears spill down your cheeks, soaking his shirt. He didn't mind.

___________________

The second time was in the emergency room.

You'd never struggled to catch your breath like this before; a common cold turned south and triggered long-dormant childhood asthma, making your lungs betray the rest of your body. Marc drove you to the ER when your hollow coughing didn't let up for the third day in a row. Head spinning and chest aflame, you were rushed to the back as soon as Marc told them you couldn't breathe.

“You've got to breathe steady, honey.”

“I'm trying,” you muttered around the medicated tube in your mouth. It had to be almost 3 in the morning; your body ached like crazy and you didn't catch a word of what the nurse told you to do with your medication. All you knew was that you were cold, exhausted, and grateful to have Marc there to time your breathing.

But even with his hand holding yours, you still felt tears pricking the corners of your eyes. Every inhalation brought medicine to your airways, but the ragged sensation resonated through your chest and made your body ache more.

“I'm so tired,” you finally said around the device. With that, your tears fell faster than you could swipe at them. Your frown pushed the device from your mouth, but you didn't care.

Marc sprang up, catching the equipment when your grip faltered. He said nothing; instead, he climbed onto the bed with you, leaning your back against his chest and taking your hand in his once more, bringing the medication back to your lips. You let him bear your weight, immediate relief washing over you as he took over keeping the device steady with one hand and gently dabbing a tissue at your cheek with the other.

“Nothing wrong with a few tears, honey. Means you’re alive.”

When you finally went home, the fire in your lungs extinguished, he held you again until you fell asleep.

_____________________

“.....The movie just started.”

(The third time was on the living room couch.)

You had finally talked Marc into watching La La Land with you (with the promise of his getting to choose the next movie night film, of course). You were barely 30 seconds into the opening number when you'd started crying, eyes glued to the screen as dozens of up-and-comers danced and sang about their dreams to make it in the industry.

“They haven't said anything.”

“They're saying everything.”

“He's dancing on a car.”

“Because he's excited!”

“Why did they stop traffic to dance?”

You didn't hear the rest of his quips, too engrossed in the scene. The colors, the music, and the highly impractical interstate choreography had a way of getting to you ever since you first saw this movie. Meanwhile, Marc sat with his arms crossed and eyebrows knit together as he tried to follow along.

When you noticed his body language, you reached for the remote and paused the movie. “Do you… want to watch something else?”

Marc's face fell when he realized this new batch of tears wasn’t because of the movie, but because of him. The thought of making your cry hit like a punch to the gut.

He took the remote from you, moving closer to your side. “Nice try, but you're not getting out of it that easily. I need your commentary if I'm gonna keep up.” He hit play and choked down every criticism as he saw your face light up, tears of joy brimming during the remaining 2 hours of the film.

The next morning, while making breakfast, you could have sworn you heard Marc humming Another Day of Sun under his breath.

_____________________

As you'd grown closer, you began to know Marc as your rock, your steady landing place when you had thoughts and feelings too big to deal with on your own. He never had to say much to be there for you. He kept you tethered and together, happy to be of service no matter how ugly your hardships felt.

It was only a matter of time before you saw a crack in his foundation.

You got home late one night, a thunderstorm hot on your heels. You had shrugged off your coat and shoes, calling out to Marc to see if he was home. No response.

You checked each room diligently, until you found him sitting on the corner of the bed.

“Marc?” You asked softly, walking toward him. You knelt in front of him, and the sight of his face twisted into an unfamiliar expression, a steady stream of tears spilling from his reddened eyes, was more than you could bear.

The first time came out of nowhere.

“Can you give me your hands, Marc?” He complied, his breath short and his eyes fixed on the storm pelting the window with sheet after sheet of rain. His vision darted between drops of water and streaks of lightning. The room shook with the echoes of thunder as the worst of the storm hit.

“Hey,” you urged him. “Just be here. With me.” Your thumb traced his wrist as you tried to stay calm. “Can you breathe with me, Marc?” You sat up on your knees. He nodded, slowly but surely matching the pace of your breath.

You didn't know what was on his mind, only that it was racing. You couldn't tell what had him so worked up, only that his breath escaped him even as you counted to ten again, and again, unrelenting in your focus on him. You had no idea what made your rock, your anchor, cry like this.

Maybe he'd tell you later; maybe it'd remain a mystery. None of that mattered in the moment. All that mattered was the rhythm of your breath as the rain let up; the way his tears drenched your sleeves when you dabbed at his flushed cheeks; the steady thrum of his heart as his body relaxed beside yours. All that mattered was how, with your chest pressed to his back as you lay on top of the bedspread, he let you hold him for a change.

_____________________

event tags: @moonknight-events @spacecowboyhotch @juneknight

addtl tags: @mrs-lockley @lunar-ghoulie @shadystarlightgentlemen @casa-boiardi (lmk if you'd like to be added/taken off this wee tag list)

#moon knight #marc spector #marc spector x reader #marc spector x gn!reader #moon knight fanfiction #marc spector fanfiction #marc spector/reader #marc spector/gn!reader #my works #mk spring bingo 2024 #moonknightevents #youtube link

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mattslolita · 1 month

Text

lunchbox friends - n. sturniolo ( 001. )

in which ... they meet at a melanie martinez concert and become best friends. platonic!nick & platonic!black!fem reader

warnings ; cussings, mentions of vape, mostly fluff!

"𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒍𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓."

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗˗ˏˋ ꒰

nervousness flooded your body as you walked up towards the venue to see your favorite singer — melanie martinez.

since 2017 when you first began listening to her, she's resonated with you deeply. her lyrics which spoke poetry about real life situations, and how her song titles were innocent but the song went deeper — the cry baby album would always be your favorite and hold a special place in your heart, but when melanie dropped portals you literally had it on repeat since that day. it's safe to say nymphology was your favorite song.

unfortunately, you didn't have many friends that listened to her on the level you did, so it resulted in you not having anyone to go with. your anxiety increased due to this, because you didn't particularly like going places alone.

your hands adjusted the bands on your wrist then you smoothed your earth green long skirt from your outfit in confidence — the line was finally starting to move as you could see the arena ahead of you, causing your nerves to cease slightly as you realized you'd be breathing the same air as your favorite singer in some minutes.

when you reached the front row just behind the barricade, you found yourself next to people already — your excited nerves flowed through your veins as you looked up at the stage in anticipation.

"oh my gosh, i love your outfit!" a male's voice says from beside you, prompting you to turn to the source.

he was brunette and taller than you, a nose ring that complimented his face nicely — the kind smile on his face caused you to smile at him.

"thank you!" you said to him, your eyes traveling down to his shoes and your smile widened, "i love your shoes so much."

"thank you," he says back to you, "i really liked this whole outfit, i devoured honestly."

"period, you did that!" you giggled at him, both of you sharing another laugh with one another.

"i'm nick, by the way," he tells you, holding his hand out for you to shake.

you look at him like he's crazy before pulling him in for a hug. "i'm y/n! it's nice to meet you."

"i'm kinda nervous, this is my first concert alone," nick tells you, and you nod knowingly, "my brothers aren't really into melanie so i didn't pressure them into coming with me."

"i'm an only child, i wished i could've had siblings to come here with me," you tell nick, and he grins.

"we should definitely hang out after this, then," nick suggests, and your eyes light up and snap your fingers at him in agreeance.

"yo brothers are finna be sick of us with the way i'm gonna blast melanie all the time," you giggle, causing nick to laugh along with you.

right off the bat, you know nick matched your energy really well — he was exactly what you looked for in a friend, and it was like a breath of fresh air when all that surrounded you in the past was toxicity.

suddenly the lights dimmed, causing both you and nick to share a grin as you clamp onto his wrist excitedly — a beautiful, earthy escape came on the screen and your eyes wandered around it as you marveled at the pretty mushrooms and butterflies that littered the scenery.

"bitch oh my gosh," nick gasps quietly, tugging on your arm to capture your attention, "she's here."

"oh my fucking word."

low and behold, melanie emerges from the stage causing everyone including both you and nick to go wild upon seeing her — alot of people shamed her for the prosthetics she wore, but you thought it was one of the most creative and bravest things she'd ever pulled off. it was definitely different, but that's why you loved her so much — she never limited her creativity, always going outside of the box. and she ate every time.

"MELANIE, I LOVE YOU!" you yelled, cupping your hands around your mouth as she lets out a giggle into the microphone.

"la, how are you guys tonight?" melanie announces, and the crowd immediately whoops and hollers for her.

"girl, cause what do you mean we're breathing the same air as her right now?" nick whispers to you, causing you to laugh as he holds his phone up towards her to capture the moment.

you follow suit, also discreetly taking a few pictures of both you and nick together ( mostly of you freaking out ), before the first song comes on, her dancers coming out as well — death.

an excited squeal comes from your mouth as you and nick are now both recording each other singing along to the song silently.

"when you aren't around," you narrate with your hands, recording you and nick, "i sink into the ground. i try to pretend i'm closer to you!"

"never understand it, you're always on my mind, i cannot help it," nick sings along with you, the both of you watching as melanie and her dancers perform in front of you.

as your favorite part draws closer, you find yourself beginning to dance, feeling this song so badly as you and nick continue singing with melanie.

"BACK FROM THE DEAD, BACK FROM THE DEAD!" you both sing, holding each other's hand as you sing, "I'M BACK FROM THE DEAD, BACK FROM THE DEAD!"

you're hyping each other up at this point and you're pretty sure there's other people giving you both crazy looks, but you could care less as you're both relishing in the amazing time you're having.

pretty soon your favorite song starts playing, and you squeal at nick in excitement as you grab his shoulder. "bitch, this is my song! i'm gonna teach you to shake ass to this one!"

"bitch i'm so excited, don't fucking play with me!" nick yells back to you.

"CALL ME YOUR NYMPH, PRAISE ME FOR MARTYR, PRAISE ME FOR SIN!" you both sing to each other, "CALL ME YOUR MUSE, A SPRITE OR AN ELF THAT YOU CRY TO AND USE!"

"i will not suffer, cry under covers," melanie sings into the microphone, swaying along and you feel yourself about to get crazy, "i'm not your mother, oh oh, oh oh-"

"IT'S NYMPHOLOGY, NOT PSYCHOLOGY!" you and nick scream, and you begin throwing it back slightly, causing nick to hype you up as he records you, "BE THE MANIC PIXIE DREAM GIRL BITCH YOU FUCKING OUTTA BE!"

"damaged audity, bought by sotheby's!" melanie sings, dancing on the stage causing you and nick to cling onto each other, "auctioned to a selfish man who thinks that he's the prophecy!"

"you can't even spell that you're an expert in nymphology!" nick sings as he records melanie.

he remains blissfully unaware as you quickly open your small purse and duck your head to take a quick hit from your peach mango watermelon elfbar, blowing the smoke downwards so that nobody could notice you.

"girl let me hit that real quick," nick whispers to you and your eyes widen before you giggle and pass it to him, watching as he ducks down the same way you did to take a hit.

the rest of the concert was magical — you couldn't believe the energy that melanie produced and the amazing show that she performed, and the newest friendship that you made. even the smallest moments like when melanie giggled into the mic again whilst singing moon cycle, or the way nick gave you water when he noticed that you were running out of breath meant, that meant the most to you.

when the concert was over, you and nick were still attached at the hip as you both gushed nonstop about your favorite singer and her abilities to make this one of the best nights you've ever had.

when you both exited the venue, you two were so engaged in conversation that you almost didn't notice a group of three girls slowly approaching the both of you.

"hi, i don't mean to interrupt you guys," a brunette girl said shyly, messing with a bracelet on her wrist as she and her friends smiled at you both, "i love you guys' videos nick, and you're one of the most gorgeous girls ever."

"thank you!" both you and nick smiled at the same time, causing the girls to giggle.

"i was wondering if i could get a picture with you both?" she asked, looking between the both of you.

"are you okay with that, y/n?" nick asks you, and you beam at the girl with a nod.

"did you guys wanna be in it too?" you asked her friends sweetly, both of them nodding with shy smiles.

the brunette girl gets in the middle as you and nick gather around her, one friend next to nick whilst the other stands on the other side of you — you smile into the camera as the girl quickly snaps three photos, and your heart could melt at the way she gushed in admiration.

"thank you guys so much!" she said to the both of you, "have a great night!"

"you too, love!" nick tells her, and you wave to them kindly.

"videos?" you querie nick with a smile, "what kind of videos do you make?"

"me and my brothers have a youtube channel together, we do vlogs and car videos," nick explains, and you nod in intrigue. "this is actually one of the first nights where i get to relax and have fun like this, honestly."

"i love that for you, then," you tell nick, then you wriggle your eyebrows with a grin, "and i would love even more to meet these brothers of yours."

nick rolls his eyes at this playfully. "girl, they're gonna wanna steal you from me!"

"that's not finna happen, cause you were gang before they were!" you tell him.

"do you live in la by any chance?" nick asks you.

"i do!" you smile, pulling your phone out and going to contacts, "give me your number and shit so we can text each other!"

"we need to plan to hang out again, too!" nick adds, as he puts his number into your phone.

"lemme call an uber before it gets too late," you pout slightly, not yet wanting to stop talking to nick. "it was so amazing meeting you, nick!"

"girl, it was great meeting you too!" nick smiles.

you bring him in for yet another hug, then ask him various times if he had a ride home to make sure he was safe — after finally reassuring you, your uber had pulled up not long after and with one final hug to nick for the night, you hop inside, waving him goodbye.

when you got home, the first thing you did was turn on the heater since it was cold in your house.

you slipped your sandals off and put your purse on the foot of your bed, going into your bathroom to wash off your makeup. a text from nick caused you to grin as you got your makeup wipes and began with the blush on your face.

twinflame❤‍🔥💋

girl tell me why i accidentally sent one of the videos to my brother and he IMMEDIATELY asked for your instagram👀

twinn🤞💜

nick😭😭😭😭

is he cute tho ?🤣

twinflame❤‍🔥💋

🙄 y'all haven't even met yet and it's already starting

i'm disappointed.

twinn🤞💜

BYEEE

no but don't give him my gram yet, i wanna meet in person😝

twinflame❤‍🔥💋

do you wanna come over sometime next weekend ?

we can go out to eat somewhere then come back and hang out!

twinn🤞💜

absolutelyyyy !

i'm so down & i'll text you to let you know !

twinflame❤‍🔥💋

goodnight girl❤

twinn🤞💜

goodnight stinkaa😘

twinflame❤‍🔥💋 liked this message!

you exited out of your messages with a content smile, finding yourself extremely excited for the next time you both would hang out. you could tell this friendship would be a good one, and you were hoping it was better than the type of friends you had in the past.

lil 💌

cause this been in my drafts for TOO long, & i love my fav so yk i had to make a best friends series for him😝 for my twinnie @thenickgirl happy early birthday to us🤭.

@luverboychris @muwapsturniolo @prettiest-poision @mattsturniolosleftnut @mrssturnioloo @guccifrog @junnniiieee07 @astrowh0r3 @v33angel @ilovechrissturniolo1 @e1ias3 @l0akkzz @hysteria-things @eyeliketoeatpoosay @sturn777 @stasiesturn @prettypinkprincess15 @breeloveschris @summerssover @mayhem-72 @riasturns @chrissturniolossidehoe @moonk1ss3d @v33angel @h3arts4harry @stargirll567 @bitchydragonparadise @heartsforchrisandmatt @pepsienthusiasts @tillies33ssss @thenickgirl @sturnprime @summerssover @k4di333 @pinksturniolo @middlepartmatt

#nicolas sturniolo #nick sturniolo #nick sturniolo x you #nick sturniolo x reader #nicolas sturniolo x you #nicolas sturniolo x reader #platonic #best friends #sturniolo triplets #the sturniolo triplets #the sturniolos #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo fandom #sturniolo imagine #Spotify

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hotvintagepoll · 1 month

Text

Propaganda

Elizabeth Taylor (Cleopatra, Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof)—iconic actress with purple eyes and a double row of eyelashes, the real ebony dementia ravenway of old hollywood. known for her stunning tastes when it comes to jewelry and her incredible, incredible advocacy during the AIDS crisis.

Setsuko Hara (Tokyo Story, Late Spring, The Idiot)— "'The only time I saw Susan Sontag cry,' a writer once told me, his voice hushed, 'was at a screening of a Setsuko film.' What Setsuko had wasn’t glamour—she was just too sensible for that—it was glow, one that ebbed away and left you concerned, involved. You got the sense that this glow, like that of dawn, couldn’t be bought. But her smiles were human and held minute-long acts, ones with important intermissions. When she looked away, she absented herself; you felt that she’d dimmed a fire and clapped a lid on something about to spill. Over the last decade, whenever anyone brought up her lips—'Setsuko’s eternal smile,' critics said, that day we learned that she’d died—I thought instead of the thing she made us feel when she let it fall." - Moeko Fujii

This is round 5 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Elizabeth Taylor:

I've been trying to steer clear of the absurdly-big names, but damnit, those violet eyes got me. The *talent*, the *presence*, the string of marriages and (temporally out-of-bounds) work in combating AIDS and pioneering in the concept of the celebrity fragrance line.

Not only did she have gorgeous violet eyes and lashes for days and one of the hottest voices ever, she was also a big supporter of the gay community

Child actress turned starlet, Liz dominated films as one of the greatest screen legends of classic hollywood. If your protagonist has violet eyes, they're imitating hers.

A Legend. She was serving milf rage in Whos Afraid Of Virginia Woolf. A Star in every sense of the word.

She was renowned for the beauty of her eyes; they were a dark blue but could look violet in certain lighting, something that photographers would actually touch up to look even more so in pictures. But even more striking was a genetic mutation that gave her a double row of eyelashes. She was also famed for her string of husbands -- 8 marriages to 7 men. Two-time hubby Richard Burton once said she was “a wildly exciting love-mistress… beautiful beyond the dreams of pornography.”

Her EYES. Early and loud support for gay rights and AIDS victims. Married a bunch of hot dudes, Burton twice!

just look at her. she's gorgeous. there's a video somewhere of her applying her eyeliner in the mirror and I think about it all the time

THE Hollywood actress of all time. Not only was she known for her long dark locks and blue-violet eyes, she also had one of the wildest life stories ever….. She’s Carrie Fisher’s stepmother because her father Eddie Fisher cheated on Debbie Reynolds with Liz. She was knighted as a dame of England. She was married to seven different men, one of them twice. She was also very kindhearted and did a lot of charity activism.

Asides from being an iconic actor, she did a lot of philanthropy and co founded the American Foundation for AIDS research. She’s sometimes considered one of the last great stars of old hollywood

Setsuko Hara:

One of the best Japanese actresses of all time; a symbol of the golden era of Japanese cinema of the 1950s After seeing a Setsuko Hara film, the novelist Shūsaku Endō wrote: "We would sigh or let out a great breath from the depths of our hearts, for what we felt was precisely this: Can it be possible that there is such a woman in this world?"

One of the greatest Japanese actresses of all time!! Best known for acting in many of Yasujiro Ozu's films of the 40s and 50s. Also she has a stunning smile and beautiful charm!

Linked gifset

Linked gifset 2

She's considered by some to be the greatest Japanese actress of all time! In Kurosawa's The Idiot she haunts the screen, and TOTALLY steals the show from Mifune every time she appears.

"No other actor has ever mastered the art of the smile to the same extent as Setsuko Hara (1920–2015), a celebrated star and highly regarded idol who was one of the outstanding actors of 40s and 50s Japanese cinema. Her radiant smile floods whole scenes and at times cautiously undermines the expectations made of her in coy, ironic fashion. Yet her smile's impressive range also encompasses its darker shades: Hara's delicate, dignified, melancholy smile with which she responds to disappointments, papers over the emotions churning under the surface, and flanks life's sobering realizations. Her smiles don't just function as a condensed version of her ever-precise, expressive, yet understated acting ability, they also allow the very essence of the films they appear in to shine through for a brief moment, often studies of the everyday, post-war dramas which revolve around the break-up of family structures or the failure of marriages. Her performances tread a fine line between social expectation and personal desire in post-war Japan, as Hara attempts to lay claim to the autonomy of the female characters she plays – frequently with a smile." [link]

Leading lady of classic Japanese cinema with a million dollar smile

Maybe the most iconic Japanese actress ever? She rose to fame making films with Yasujiro Ozu, becoming one of the most well-known and beloved actresses in Japan, working from the 30s through the 60s in over 100 hundred. She is still considered one of the greatest Japanese actresses ever, and in my opinion, just one of the greatest actresses of all time. And she was HOT! Satoshi Kon's film Millennium Actress was largely based on her life and her career.

#setsuko hara #elizabeth taylor #hotvintagepoll #fuck that old woman #ladies 5

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ponderingmoonlight · 10 months

Note

I already submitted a request, so I don't know if I can do it again. If not, then sorry, and ignore my message.

You wrote that we can request something of our own. How about any of these options?

1.Gojo loves his wife very much. And when the Elders send her 24/7 without rest on dangerous missions. Gojo becomes very angry with the elders.

2.Gojo again boasts to the reader that he is the strongest. But she answers him that he does not have to be the strongest with her, he can just be Satoru.

I just had to write that first idea down, thank you so much <3 Hope you enjoy!

A word of power

Pairing: husband!Gojo x reader

Word Count: 1,8k

Synopsis: When his wife is sent to missions over and over until it visibly gets to her, Gojo decides to do something against it.

Warnings: lanugage, mentions of injury, not proofread

„Hey darling.“

Your heavy footsteps echo through the dark hallways of your apartment, eyelids hanging heavy in your face. That was a rough mission. The how many? You lost count at 20. It seems like all you do is exorcise, eat, sleep a few hours and repeat everything. You loved being a jujutsu sorcerer by heart, it is a great honor for you to be able to help people this way. But nights like this, when you don’t get to enjoy the warmth of your own home until well after midnight, it really gets to you.

“There you are honey, what took you so long?”

But no matter how rough the mission was, no matter how late you come back, this one person is always there to greet you with a cup of hot tea and a shoulder to cry on. After all, your husband knows well enough how it feels to carry the burden of being a strong jujutsu sorcerer. With the slight difference that he is in fact the strongest.

“Oh, y’know…Things got a little heated, had some new students by my side to watch. One of them got injured so I stayed with him and Shoko until he was well enough to survive the night. Tomorrow I’ll have to leave pretty early in the morning”, you explain briefly, barely able to formulate a straight sentence.

Satoru’s eyes scan over your bruised and feeble looking body. How many missions in a row do you have to endure until these old farts decide to give you a break? You are an outstanding jujutsu sorcerer, probably better than anyone else at Jujutsu High apart from himself. And you have a heart of gold – too good for these people. They use you and you don’t seem to mind as long as you help the weaker and your students out. Normally Gojo admires you for composure, endurance and strength. But haven’t you given enough? Even the strongest need rest from time to time.

“I don’t like the way they are treating you. You are pushed from mission to mission, (y/n). This can’t go on like this, I haven’t really seen you for days. You’re only home to sleep and eat something from time to time.”

You let yourself fall in his lap, instantly greeted by his strong arms. Oh, it feels so good to be back where you belong – in the embrace of your beloved husband.

“You know it yourself: the worst part about being strong is that no one ever asks if you’re okay”, you sign.

He presses a gentle kiss on your forehead, but his body tenses under you. Satoru already told you multiple times that it can’t go on like this. And even though you secretly agree with him, you see no other way. The people need you, as well as your students. Maybe it just isn’t part of the job to have many breaks.

“But I do. And I care about my wife’s wellbeing more than about Jujutsu High itself. I will talk to them. I can’t watch anymore.”

“Satoru.”

Your tired eyes lock with his. You had this talk over and over. Even though you really appreciate his concern, you don’t want him to use the power he has for you.

“You know what I think about that, please don’t.”

“But baby, I really miss you! You lost a fair amount of weight, you sleep maybe 8 hours a week and are constantly worn out. It can’t go on like this. I know that this isn’t a job but your passion and that you refuse to let anyone down, but at the moment, you neglect yourself the most. You need to be your own priority. And if you don’t want to stand up for yourself, be sure that I will. Because I love you with all my heart and I promised to be there for you.”

You really don’t deserve him. Satoru looks after you like no other, his six eyes always set upon you. How can a woman be so lucky and call him her wife? To be honest, you still have no clue why he chose you. Was is because you are strong? Or because you’re smart? Maybe it was for your looks, but there are tons of beautiful women on this earth. You hug him a little tighter.

“I love you, Satoru”, you breathe out, small smile hanging on your lips while your mind slowly drifts away.

Sleep. Sleep sounds good at the moment. Maybe you can rest your eyes for a few seconds…

“(y/n), are you still with me?”

No reaction. The air is only filled by your soft and monotone breathing. He smiles at you tenderly, hands wrapped around your knees and back in order to carry you into the bedroom where you belong. He knows you hate it when he stands up for you, stating that he shouldn’t use the power he holds as the strongest to send you into vacation. Although being married to him, you want to stay independent in your job. Oh, what a great catch you are. But this can’t go on like this.

He lays your passed out body gently on the bed and tucks you in, thumb gently caressing your cheek. How is it possible that even after 2 years of marriage, he still admires your beauty like on the first day he met you at Jujutsu High? No matter how tired and worn out you are, no matter that your body is marked by your work. You must be the most beautiful woman in this world – externally and internally.

Satoru’s hands ball into fists. And that is exactly why he has to do something against this madness. You might be tender, sacrificing selfless, but he is certainly not when it comes to you. They won’t get away with this.

_____________________________________________________________

“Don’t do anything stupid, darling”, you warn him, eyes still glistering from lack of sleep.

You know that look on his face all too well. It doesn’t sit right with him that you leave, especially this early. But you have no other choice. These people need you, as well as your students. When you became a jujutsu sorcerer, you knew it would be hard work and that you have to put your own needs on the back burner. Oh, how much you’d love to spend a day with your husband at Jujutsu High, finally teaching the young how to use their abilities again.

But this is your destiny now. And if you can make your contribution with that, you will simply endure it.

“Don’t know when I’ll come home. I text you when it’s over. Love you”, you place a small kiss on his cheek and take in his scent one last time before you leave again.

Satoru puts on his uniform and makes his way to Jujutsu High. Fuck your determination and prohibitions. He doesn’t care about those anyway. The only thing that’s important to him at the moment is your well-being.

“You’ve got some nerve”, he starts, bursting into the room where Yoshinobu Gakuganji, Masamichi Yaga and some other old farts are gathered on the floor, gazing at him with nothing but annoyance in their eyes.

“You can’t just barge in here like that”, Gakuganji comments.

“I really don’t give a fuck. How is it that my wife has been sent on missions without a break for months? Find someone else to do your dirty work”, Satoru hisses, face visibly irritated even though he’s wearing his blindfold.

“She never complained though. You know yourself that jujutsu sorcerers don’t grow like grass in a meadow. She’s efficient, sturdy and straightforward. She’s old enough to take care of her own, Satoru”, Yaga replies dryly.

Is this for real? Again, Satoru’s hands ball into fists, whole body on fire. Are they actually listening to themselves?

“Yeah, she never complained because she literally never does, boneheads. That was her last mission for time being, otherwise I’ll torch the whole place here. Never forget that it’s my wife we’re talking about.”

“You would never do that”, Utahime remarks.

“Don’t. Test. Me.”

“This is my last warning. Put her back as a teacher, which is actually her main job in this rat hole. If something like that happens again, I’ll make your life living hell. Mark my words.”

And with that, Gojo storms out of the room, leaving everyone in awe. They have never seen him this serious and angry. Maybe you really do need a break.

“I have to say…(y/n) worked her ass off over the last few weeks, more than any other jujutsu sorcerer…”, Gakuganji throws into the room.

“You can’t imagine what happened!”, you yell through the whole apartment, a smile creeping up Satoru’s face.

“I bet you’ll tell my in just a second”, he replies.

“I’ve got some time off, no mission in sight! And I will get to finally teach again. God, I really miss the students”, you groan, letting yourself fall into Satoru’s arms.

“What a lucky coincidence. They must have finally realized that you are working yourself up.”

“Don’t fool me, I know exactly that you have something to do with this. Even though I told you not to.”

“(y/n), I would never do that! As a good husband, I would never in a million years even think about doing something you told me not to do!”, he dramatically announces.

“You threatened them, didn’t you?”

“Well, y’know. I told them a few things”, he admits with a sly smile

You want to be mad at him for disregarding you, but you simply can’t. Deep within, you are way too relieved over a good amount of sleep that you can even think about lashing out on him for helping you.

“Please tell me you weren’t mean.”

You wrap your arms around his large frame and kiss him passionately. God, how much you missed this. Finally you are able to enjoy time with your husband again, to wake up next to him in the morning and snuggle up to him, no following mission lingering through your mind. Only now you realize how tired and worn out you actually are. If it wasn’t for Satoru you’d probably break down rather sooner than later. Maybe you really need to stand up for yourself more…

“Oh, I was. But I don’t want to think about these old farts right now. Let’s go to bed instead.”

“Nothing better than that”, you mumble against his chest while sleep consumes you all over again.

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ninaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa · 2 months

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Champagne problems

Charles Leclerc x reader

𝗪𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀:language, drinking, crying, just a lot of sadness tbh..

————————

The season has come to an end, I couldn’t be more relieved. Charles won his third championship, i couldn’t be more relieved about that either.

Its been a tough couple of years for him, he’s been extremely busy. This year more than ever.. we started dating 6 years ago. From the start we had so many plans, so many things we were excited for. Those ideas of relaxing and spending long days in the sun together vanished into thin air the second he promised his father that he would sign with Ferarri. I don’t blame him, how could I ?

Charles was a man who made a promise to his passed father, it would be extremely selfish of me to bring it up. I honestly didn’t feel the need to, my life was perfect in every way. Charles was everything and more. He was caring, compassionate, funny, respectful and extremely romantic.

That brings us to today, the end of the season party. It was quite a formal gathering. With bejeweled cocktail dresses and champagne flowing.

Me and Charles walked in hand-in-hand. He was being nicer than normal, if even possible. We greeted a bunch of people, all of them congratulating Charles with huge smiles and compliments.

I settle down on a wooden chair with a white cushion, my little black dress with gold detailing working perfectly with the colour theme of the party. Carmen and Kika sit next to me, both of them staring at their boyfriends with big smiles. I take a moment to look around the boat, bustling crowds filled the deck, all of them crowding around Charles. He had won the Championship this year. It was his third, for the third year in a row. He had promised me we would start to settle after he reached his goal. We never did, always on the move and always making promises we couldn’t keep.

———— 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝘆𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗮𝗴𝗼

“Charles you did not !” I scream, my hands covering my tear filled face. The man I would do anything for stood with a proud posture and a devastatingly beautiful smile on his face. I practically sprinted into his arms, his flannel riding up on my body and exposing my lace underwear.

Charles took me to his family’s lake house, the season was at its end and Ferarri was second on the leaderboard. He had decided to steer clear of the chaos and rather taken me away for a little vacation before Christmas with his family in December. I was over the moon at the thought of spending the whole of November in the cabin with him. What I was not expecting was him buying me a Chevy convertible. It was my dream car, I had brought it up a few times, all black with red leather seats. It was gorgeous, the interior being Ferarri red and the exterior being as black as the night sky. “Thank you Charles, I love it.” I say with a huge smile on my lips, staring deeply into his eyes, I only see my future.

“I love you, Y/n.”

————𝘁𝗼𝗱𝗮𝘆

My mind goes foggy with all the memories of what we had, I almost don’t realize that Kika was tapping my leg. I blink a few times and smile at the stunning woman in front of me. “Y/n, are you alright? You look a little tense.” Kika was an amazing friend and I appreciated her throughout the years. I look down at her hand on my leg, her diamond ring glistened in the flashing lights of the yacht. Her and Pierre were engaged, the two being absolutely perfect for each other. “Yes, I am. Just excited to go home, is that bad ?” I was happy for Charles, but I was exhausted with this whole thing. I was with him every step of the way and I wasn’t complaining. I loved Charles, more than I have ever loved anyone, I gave up everything for him. My job, my friends back home, my family, in all honesty I gave up my whole life to be by his side. I regret it now, the guilt of leaving everyone and the job I had such a passion for, it was catching up to me. I did not matter beyond Charles and his social bubble. I made new friends and I had everything I could want. but it was all so bittersweet.

“Y/n!” I snap back into reality once more. “Fuck , i’m sorry Kika, I should probably go freshen up.” She gives me a sympathetic look, offering to go with me before I turn her down and make my way to the bathroom. I use the one by the master bedroom, as I know there would not be anyone. This isn’t my first time breaking down on this yacht. It’s actually been a tradition for the last three years. Sulking in the bathroom, my mascara smudged onto my inflamed cheeks. It happens every damn year.

This wasn’t what I wanted, nor was it what I deserved. I was stuck in a loop of race after race and party after party. Charles was a natural, this was his favorite way to pass the time. Noting else really mattered all that much. Except me, i guess. He showed me love and care that I have never experienced before. Even with the back lash i received daily. And not only from fans and supporters, but from friends and family members too. His close family and I were in a verg good place. His mum adored me and his brother and I got along very well. I felt comfortable and loved around them. It was the distant relatives and friends that had their opinions. It never bothered Charles, so much so that he didn’t even think to check if it maybe bothered me. It did, a tremendous amount, actually. But I was stuck in the same loop, for I don’t know how long. I couldn’t leave, but I couldn’t bare the thought of this routine going on for decades. My chevy has stood in a private parking garage for the last three years now, only been driven once when I took Charles along with me to pack up my dorm at med school, quitting that year and deciding to move in with Charles. I would have been a doctor by now, a surgeon actually.

I hear a bottle pop and have no doubt in my mind it’s the bottle of Champagne Charles had brought. I clean myself up and walk out of the bathroom, my tears dried and my hart heavy. As I turn the corner I run into Kika who looks like she’s waiting for me. “Y/n, what’s going on?” She has a very concerned look on her face, I smile at that, appreciating how much she cares. Her hand is once again gripping onto me, her ring taking my attention. “You think he’s going to?” she whispers, a slight frown on her face. That confused me, I thought she would be excited at the idea of me and Charles getting married. I’m not even sure I was. “I don’t kn- ”

“Y/n !” I look over Kika’s shoulder to see Charles on his way over. “I’ve been looking all over for you, where have you been love ?” He exclaims gently, his hand in my lower waist. I instantly feel safe in his embrace, like the world stopped for a second and allowed me to take a deep breath. Kika squeezed my arms and walked over to her fiancé. “Sorry, I was with Kika.” I say hazy. I really needed to get my shit together.

“no need to apologize. Cmon, Arthur wants to do shots.”

I was a few drinks deep when the music switched to a slow song, Charles immediately found me, his arms wrapping around my waist. his head rests gently against the side of my temple, the same temple that was pounding and messing with my ability to stay in the present. “I love you so fucking much Y/n. You do know that right?” Charles pours his heart out. I dropped his hand that was so tightly held in mine. I pinch my eyes shut, finding Pascal looking at me with sorrow filled eyes. I was so fucking confused why people kept looking at me like that.

So i chose to ignore it, I leaned back, looking into Charles’s captivating eyes. “I do, I love you more than anything Charlie.” I smile at him. He kisses me, the kiss is passionate and soft. It almost felt as if I would never see him again. When my eyes opened I looked around and saw that it was only me and Charles left on the dance floor, everyone gathered around us. I frown, looking back at Pascal and Kika they both have worried expressions on their faces, Arthur is taking back glass after glass, with the same panicked expression on his face. But he’s not looking at me, he’s looking behind me. I turn around to be met with the Lorenzo on the other side of the crowd. His expression also mirroring the rest. Fingertips graze my leg and I look down to a hopeful Charles with his mother’s ring in his hands. The world stops, not to give me a deep breath, but to suffocate me. I felt breathless and light headed. It was dead silent, the only sound being Arthur putting the now empty bottle of Dom Perignon on the glass table.

“Y/n you are everything. I have never in my whole life been this inlove, nor have I ever imagined an angel like you to ever grace me with your presence. I cannot imagine myself without yo- ”

“Charles.” I whisper, my breath caught in my throat and my eyes watering. Everything burned, the lights the feeling of his fingers still gripping my leg, the sting in my heart.

“Y/n let me finish, baby. It would be an honor to live up to this speech every day. So if I could just finish it?” He smiles at me. Down on one knee and love circulating in both eyes.

“Charles I-” I choke on my words. “Okay I understand my love, this is a big thing, I’ll skip my shitty speech for now.” I wanted to say something but I felt as if i was going to fall faint right here and die. “Y/n I have loved you for a long time now, and I intend to do so until I die.”

“Will you marry me?”

Complete and utter silence, throughout the whole boat, nobody made a sound. The problem was, I didn’t either.

Charles looked at me with years and years of adoration and love and my heart broke a little more every second I stood still.

“No.” I whisper.

Gasps all around the room, it’s all I could hear. Kika let out a big sigh and Pascal let out a big sob. I could hear curse words being thrown and Charles’s manager saying how I could have been such a lovely bride. I next hear Carlos reply “what a shame she’s fucked in the head.”

“Fuck. I- I’m sorry, I can’t.” I sigh and sob at the same time, hyperventilating almost. Charles dropped the ring out of shock, and I could see his heart was also on the ground, although it was shattered.

I turn away in a complete state and rush towards the street. Quickly climbing into a cab and going home. I pack all the things I could need for a few days before taking off on the next train to God knows where. The train is silent and not a single person is awake. I look around the train, my phone ringing uncontrollably in my hand.

I take a seat next to an elderly woman, her window wide open. My phone goes through that same window about gen second later. As do all my worries. My heart has never hurt this much, but I have never in my life felt a weight quite this big being lifted off my shoulders.

I open my leather wallet and look at the picture of Charles tucked on the inside. That too goes out of the window.

••••••••

hope you enjoyed!

there won’t be a part 2 unless this story really takes off, but I doubt it ?

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗸𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 !!!!

#charles leclerc #cl16 #charles leclerc x reader #chatles leclerc imagines #imagines #cl16 x reader #cl16 imagine #formula 1 #f1 imagine #arthur leclerc #pierre gasly #max verstappen #kika gomes #yacht girl #lando norris #f1 fic #ferarri

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elllisaaa · 5 months

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skz as olivia rodrigo songs - hyung line

-> pairing : skz hyung line x fem!reader

-> words count : 2.9k words

-> genre : angst, exes, toxic relationship, messy breakup

-> sorry for any mistakes, english is not my first language.

-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated !

-> author's note : maknae line version is coming out next week, hope you'll enjoy this !

-> masterlist | skz masterlist | 1k event masterlist

hyung line | maknae line

BANGCHAN - HAPPIER

You felt weird, surrounded by Chan’s family all over again. It’s been years since you last saw his parents and Hannah, and as much as they were the sweetest with you, you couldn’t help your heart from feeling heavy as you sat down for the ceremony. You put on a dress that you bought specifically for the occasion : a black one, Chan’s favorite color, and you couldn’t say if you did it on purpose or not.

But what were you expecting by coming to his wedding anyway ? For him to take you back after all these years ? For him to leave the girl he seemed so happy being with ? You perfectly knew it was impossible, but still, you couldn’t help a little bit of hope from lingering. That was maybe why you came in the end, that or you really were a masochist.

You sat down next to Hannah on the first row of chairs. At first, you wanted to hide yourself at the back, but she insisted and you didn’t have the heart to tell her that you were not over her brother. As soon as he entered the room, applause erupted, and you were still starstruck by how handsome he was, especially today, with his wedding suit and hair neatly done but mostly the beautiful smile eating up his face as he waited for his fiancée.

You had met her one or two times, and she really was a sweet girl, exactly his type. Sometimes, you wondered if he told her the same things he said to you to comfort her when she was feeling down, wondered if he told her she was the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen. Your eyes followed her as she walked down the aisle, holding on to her father’s arm. She was looking like a princess in her white dress, and Chan was looking at her like she was the only person in the room.

No one batted an eye when you started crying, Hannah simply holding your shoulders and assuming that you were getting emotional, like you had always been. But all you could think about was how you imagined yourself marrying him one day so many times, how you wished you were the one he was saying “yes” to.

“- I didn’t think you’d come.”

You knew it was him without needing to lift your head from your glass of wine, his voice still imprinted in your mind and soul.

“- You still are important to me, I wouldn’t have let you down on the day of your wedding.”

You tried your best to smile at him like you used to as he sat down beside you. You had escaped from the main party to take some rest, breathing better in the fresh hair of the night. You couldn’t help staring at Chan, his breathtaking features accentuated by the dim lighting of the exterior.

“- Thank you Y/N, it really means so much to me.”

And he smiled at you, just like he used to. It was as if you were the one getting married with him tonight, as if nothing ever happened and that you were still happy. But the ring on his finger was not matching the lack of one on yours, and you felt tears gathering in your eyes again.

“- I… I have to be honest, I came for selfish reasons…

- Why that ?

- Because I can’t let you go. Whatever I’ll do, a part of me will always love you Chan.”

You could see his eyes shining more than usual, and you had known him for long enough to know that he was about to cry too.

“- Don’t do that to me please, not today…”

You turned your gaze away from him for a moment, whipping away the few tears that had managed to escape.

“- I really hope you'll be happy, just not like how you were with me.

- Nothing will ever come close to what I felt for you.”

You closed your eyes as Chan stood up and leaned in to kiss your forehead like he used to do each time you were crying and you couldn’t help another tear from rolling down your cheek as you watched him go away and join his wife.

LEE MINHO - THE GRUDGE

Always being the one to end your previous relationships, you were not ready for what happened to you that day. For that one phone call from Minho, saying that everything was over. For all the things that unraveled, how fast it all ended. One year later, you were still confused, still couldn’t get over it, over him.

He was the sole reason you were getting drunk with some girls you only had known for a few weeks. It was so unlike you, but everything you did lately was. You thought that you finally got over, finally succeeded in moving on, even got to a few dates, but nothing could compare to him despite the way he treated you.

Your head was spinning, and it seemed like the world around you was twirling too, but it all felt good. It felt good to have nothing to worry about anymore, to not feel this heavy weight on your heart anymore, to not think about Minho for one single night. Suddenly, you started to laugh, euphoria running down your veins at the feeling of not being alone anymore.

You vaguely remember how two of your friends had to get you off the bar and ask you who they could call to come and get you home safely. And the only name you were able to mutter was his, it has always been him. You didn’t notice at first, simply letting go in the warm embrace and familiar scent that felt too close to your heart. Only when he helped you sit down in the passenger seat of his car did you fully register that Minho was really there. Immediately, you felt a lot more sober, a knot forming in your throat as he started to drive through the city.

“- Are you mad ?”

Of course he would. Who wouldn’t when your ex was calling you one year after the breakup to come and get her home because she got drunk ?

“- I am not mad. Just worried. You’ve never been the type to go out like that.”

True. When Minho was still your boyfriend, you always refused to go out to clubs with him, but not forcing him to stay home with you either, you simply didn’t like the mood of these places. But now, it was one of the ways you could get him out of your system, even if it was only for a few hours before he came back to haunt you day and night. You just shrugged, turning your head toward the window, not daring to look at him, too scared that you’ll start crying.

“- People change I guess.”

Silence lingered awkwardly for a few minutes, the only sound being the one of the radio that Minho had turned on when he got into the car.

“- How are you doing ?”

You couldn’t help the bitter laugh that escaped your lips at his question. And maybe it was the fact that you were drunk, or maybe because you were holding in all these reproaches for too long but you couldn’t stop the flood of words coming out of your mouth anymore.

“- Are you seriously expecting me to be okay with the way you left me ? Fuck Minho ! You only called me one day out of the blue and told me that you were leaving and you didn’t even give me a reason ! What do you think it did to me ? I tried to understand, I swear I tried but all I could think about was that I did something wrong and now I hear your voice every time that I think I’m not enough !”

The tears that always formed in your eyes whenever you thought about telling him that to his face were not there today, the rage you had kept under control for too long taking too much space in your mind.

“- Don’t act like I was the only one responsible, we both hurt each other.

- Maybe, but those cuts were never equal. And as much as I would like to not care, I’m not fine Minho, I’m really not…”

Both of you fell silent again for the rest of the way to your apartment. You got home in one piece, but you felt even more broken inside. And it was all because of him, once again.

SEO CHANGBIN - LOGICAL

From the moment Changbin became your boyfriend, he always made sure to treat you like a princess. He never let you pay for anything, always held the door for you, did everything you wanted and even what you didn’t voice. He did it all, making you feel so special, making you feel like you deserved to be loved like that.

The downside was that he was not so open about his own life and feelings. Of course, he always made sure to ask you about your day at work, about what you ate for lunch and every single little detail of your life - he knew it all. But often, when you asked him in return the same questions, you were either met with silence or a short answer that made you understand that he didn’t want to expand on the subject.

But that was okay, because he was treating you right. Until the day it was not okay. Until the day you started to notice that maybe, he was lying about where he really was when he came home very late from work. Was that girl really his friend ? Was she more ? You didn’t know anymore and doubt started to fill you up.

Changbin convinced you though : you were his everything, no one else, it was all in your mind. And you choose to believe him. Why wouldn’t you ? It was your first bad argument since you got together, nothing to worry about. But as time went on, he built a giant castle with walls so high you couldn’t see behind them anymore. Everything seemed to be normal but the second you asked the wrong question, he was shouting and storming out of the room, going on and on about how you had to let him breathe and stop being so clingy.

“- Did you eat what I left in the kitchen for you last night ? It’s a new recipe and I wanted your opinion about it.”

Your boyfriend didn’t even lift his head from his phone to answer you.

“- No, I had already eaten.

- Oh, that’s not a problem, we can warm it up for today’s dinner !”

As you were making your way to the kitchen, ready to pick up the take out box you left on the counter the night before and to ignore the way your heart was clenching at his dry response, you heard him standing up from the couch and going to the door.

“- Where are you going ?

- God can’t you stop being annoying for once ? I told you, I need my own space.”

You were almost disposed to let it slide once again. Almost. Why today ? Why this time, you couldn’t take it anymore ? You didn’t know. But you heard very well the way your voice broke as you spoke again, joining Changbin near the door.

“- It’s not space you need Changbin, it’s for me to leave because you clearly don’t want me around anymore. I can’t deal with all these arguments that you hold over my head and hearing you compare me to the girls you could have instead. I- I need some time for myself too…”

The man in front of you sighed before taking your hands in his, his gaze was supposed to be soft but you could feel something else behind his kindness.

“- If it’s what you need, I’ll let you have that baby, but you can’t accuse me of things I didn’t do, okay ? If you want us to work, you need to put in some effort too.”

You snatched your hands from his embrace, shaking your head and trying not to cry in front of him one more time, trying not to be weak and give in like every other time. He really got you thinking that two plus two equals five, and that you were the love of his life.

“- Not this time. I won’t fall for your lies again.”

You heard him leave as you started to pack up some of your things, not bothering asking you to stay because he knew that you would come back sooner or later. After all, changing him may be possible, and you had to try one more time, just to be sure that there was nothing more to do before giving up. Until the next time.

HWANG HYUNJIN - VAMPIRE

Meeting Hyunjin was like a dream at first, like a love story from the movies he played in. You met him casually, at a coffee shop and he spilled his drink on you because he wasn’t watching where he was going. And from this point on, everything had been perfect. He was charming, respectful, funny, everything you could ask for.

He would take you out often for dates, even when he was busy. He showed you his paintings, even made some of you because he said you were his muse. He presented you to his family, only to prove to you how serious he was about your relationship. How could you doubt him when he was acting like a true gentleman, the best boyfriend ever ?

Well, there had been some girls that warned you about him fooling around to get something bigger. But wasn’t it coming with being a good actor - the rumors to try and sabotage his relationships and career ? You assumed it was. And he was being so sweet, it wasn’t possible, you thought.

That’s why you introduced him to your family too, to show him that you were just as much invested in this, that it was not just him. Because you were. You had never been so in love with someone before, never fell so hard for someone before. He made you feel like it was your first love all over again, and you wanted this to last, to last forever if possible.

Immediately, you felt a bond forming between your father and your boyfriend, and you couldn’t have been more happy about it. Your father was the one who took care of you after the death of your mother, and he did an amazing job. He was always there for you when you needed it, and you valued his opinion a lot. So to know that he approved Hyunjin was a huge relief, one that made you feel even more confident in the fact that this relationship was meant to last for a long time.

So of course, the day Hyunjin came home to announce that your dad had given him the opportunity to have a part in his next play, you couldn’t have been more proud of your boyfriend. He deserved it, and your father must have sensed his talent too because he wasn’t working with anyone. And you didn’t mind that he sometimes spent days without texting or calling because of work. He was working hard to not disappoint your father, you understood.

But slowly, he became more distant, stopped texting you back, leaving you without any news for days, and then weeks, and then months. You didn’t need for him to explain himself, what he did was enough to have all the answers you wanted. You had made some big mistakes, but Hyunjin sure did make the worst one look fine, and you couldn’t help thinking it even more when you saw him on stage the night of the premiere. He was literally glowing, and if you didn’t know what he had done to you, you would have begged him on your knees to take you back.

“- That was amazing Dad !

- Really ? You loved it ? Don’t lie to me sweetheart, you know your opinion is very important to me !

- I would never lie about such a thing, I really appreciated it, and I think everyone did !

- Well, Hyunjin was the star of this play after all, it couldn’t be bad !”

At the mention of his name, he turned around, walking to your father with a smile that you knew for sure now was fake, greeting you too, as if nothing happened. You stayed strong, even if you were screaming inside, but followed the troupe for an after party anyway.

“- Was it worth it ?”

Hyunjin's confused stare answered you, not expecting you to talk to him since you were sitting side by side in complete silence for almost ten minutes.

“- What are you talking about ?

- Making me believe that it was true love. Was it worth it ?

- I didn’t do that. I had too much work, and you know it. I ended it before I would hurt you more. I protected you because I loved you.”

You couldn’t help the sour feeling on your tongue as you let out a sarcastic laugh.

“- Love my ass. You can’t love anyone because that would mean you have a heart. And you obviously don’t since it was so fun bleeding me dry like a fucking vampire.”

Now, you were feeling bad for all the girls you sent away, thinking they were lying about him. But they couldn’t have been more right : he really was a famefucker.

-> i don't allow any copies, reposts or translations of my work.

skz taglist (fill in this to be added) :

@minnies-babie @binwons @yoongles2025 @thicccurls @caitlyn98s @hildaortara @sharonxdevi @skz1-4-3 @bbgnyx

1k event taglist (fill in this to be added) :

@rhjwjwhf

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josephquinnswhore · 1 year

Note

hi honey! i discovered your blog not too long ago and my love your writing is so amazing i actually can't get enough!

i had a request if your taking them? it would be a dad!pedro pascal x wife!reader. and i've been thinking about this heavy since he was at the oscar's

could you do like a super fluff about everyone's reactions if he was the one to win an oscar for best actor?

hope you have a wonderful day my love! 💝

Cause for Celebration - pedro pascal x female reader

Summary: Pedro is nervous about being nominated for his first Oscar Award.

Word Count: 1.9k

Note: This is the best frigging idea I’ve ever seen. I love this and I hope it lives up to your expectations!! 🤍 This is my first request I’m crying so many tears right now! Thank you anon I LOVE you. May you pillow always be cold on both sides. Please let me know if you like it 🫶🏼🫶🏼

Your fingers seem to have a conscious of their own, mindlessly twisting your wedding ring around your finger to stop your hands from jittering as you were led to the paparazzi.

“Pedro! Pedro over here!” The flash of white light was blinding, the screaming and calling of paparazzi as they’re desperately attempting to gain your attention, you smile politely as you stand next to Pedro, changing your pose to his arm around your back and your hand resting on his chest. “Pedrito! I love you!” A fan screamed from next to the photographers, the one confession was enough for Pedro to thank the photographers, entwine your hands and make a beeline straight for his fans, as you approach the fans are a mess, crying and screaming as Pedro signs their items, even taking some selfies with fans. “Y/n can we please get a photo! We love you!” Your heart skipped, smiling at how sweet his fans were and you accepted graciously, “of course sweetheart!” You bare the biggest grin and lean into her as she cries, ignoring the metal barrier that presses into your ribs. “Thank you so much! Good luck Pedro!” You both thank them and move on to the interview the woman, you knew well from Pedro’s past interviews and long mop of auburn hair. Pedro’s warm hand met your back, hands grazing on the sequinned gold dress that clung to your body graciously.

“Pedro it’s so good to see you again, this is your wife right?” Pedro let out a small laugh, turning his body towards you in an attempt to include you. “Yes, this is my beautiful wife, how couldn’t I bring her? She’s my number one supporter.” The redness that spreads along your cheeks heats your face, adding to the blush from your make up. You clasp your hands together and let out an excited huff of air, “you’ve done so incredibly this year honey, you deserve this Oscar. I’ll run up to the stage and snatch it if you don’t win!” Your giggles are harmonised by Pedro’s and Amelia’s laugh. “Will you be on the dance floor with Pedro at the after party this evening?” Your hand tentatively rubs down Pedro’s arm, shaking the nerves off you, “of course how could I not? I cant have another beautiful woman claiming my man!” Pedro scoffs playfully, “you know I only have eyes for you cariño.” Amelia sighs adoringly at the two of you, “well that confirms it folks! Pedro and y/n are the hottest couple on the red carpet tonight!” She turns away from the camera her co worker held and back to you, “good luck tonight, see you two next time!”

Both saying your goodbyes, Pedro’s assistant led you past a long line of celebrities, waiting to be let in, your breath hitched, “oh my god you’re skipping past Andrew Garfield!” Pedro slips his hand into yours, “must be getting important baby,” he jokes, knowing of your little crush on Andrew, and you’re led straight into the venue. “You’re the most important to me baby- whoa,” you gasp in awe, interrupting yourself. The room was ridiculously huge, hundreds of seats in rows you couldn’t count, the stage was empty, other than the stand and a large screen above the stage, red curtains framed the outside.

“I can’t believe this is real, I mean I can. You deserve this more than anyone, I’m just so proud of you.” Celebrities fill the hundreds of seats, the ones near you being filled with A-List celebrities you’d crushed on when you were younger. “Thank you baby.” He presses a soft kiss to your temple, moving his arm around to rest on the back of your chair, you lean into him as the ceremony begins, lights dimming slightly as the spotlights shone bright on the presenters.

Unsurprisingly, Michelle Yeoh won best actress. She was a talented actor, her role as Evelyn in ‘everything everywhere all at once’ was unmatched. The mix of sci-fi and adventure had you on the edge of your seat and was a brilliantly produced movie. Her speech was just as brilliant, her sense of humour and gratitude was touching, and you felt nothing but happiness for her as she thanked her family, shaking the hands of presenters, Harrison Ford and Kate Hudson who clapped in celebration for her.

“We would like to start off with a massive thank you to everyone who joins us tonight, this has been a massive year of acting and the most incredible. We are excited to announce that Halle Berry and Elizabeth Olsen will be presenting the next award and last of the night.” Harrison Ford and Kate Hudson clap to themselves as they introduce two of your idols, barely containing your excitement you clap steadily, Pedro laughing at your excitement.

“This is it baby, this is yours.” You grip his hand encouragingly. “We are happy to present this years best actor, with some incredible nominees including; Austin Butler for his role in Elvis”, a montage of the Elvis movie flashes on the large screen tv. “Brandon Fraser for his role in The Whale,” cheer erupts through the stadium, Brandon was special to a lot of people, no doubt he would win if Pedro didn’t. “Colin Farrell for his role in ‘The Banshees of Inisherin, and what an interesting movie that was.” You find yourself jittering, Pedro’s warmth leaving your hand as he straightens his jacket, a nervous twitch of his. “Last but not least, Pedro Pascal for his spectacular role of Joel Miller in The Last of Us game rendition.” Your eyes focus on the screen, your husband portraying Joel Miller, your hand running down his suit pant on his thigh. “I’m here baby, we got this.” You whisper, reassuring the anxiety both of you felt.

The room cheered for Pedro, your heart soars with pride as you cheer along. “Alright alright let’s get to it.” The crowd shushes, the rooms tension increased tenfold. The fumbling of the envelope could be heard through the microphone, the crackling of the paper as it opened and the two women looked at each other with a big smile on their face. “The winner for the 2023 Best Actor award is,” you’re on the edge of your seat and Pedro is still, anxiety clawing at him. “Pedro Pascal!” They exclaim in unison. Your jaw hits the floor, pride and excitement becoming too much, the whole room cheered for him, he was unmoving in his seat, in shock that he actually won. You pull his arm upward, a big grin on your face as he stands, you stand with him and you don’t miss the loving look in his eyes, he kisses you softly, laughing as he pulls away, moving toward the stage. You and your peers are clapping, your tears welling on your lash line threatened to ruin your perfectly applied make up. Pedro shakes Halle and Elizabeth’s hands, taking the Oscar in his hands and cradles it, as if it were made of glass. “I don’t even know what to say, I was certain I wouldn’t win so I haven’t prepared much of a speech.” The confession earned him a chuckle from the crowd, yourself included at his truth. “I just, want to thank my family, my mother for guiding me my sisters and nephews for their support. Everyone on my team and the guys at Naughty Dog for giving me this life-changing opportunity. I want to thank the other nominees, especially Brandon Frasier, your journey and story has touched us all and we love you man.” The room erupts in cheer, whistling clapping and yelling echo in agreement. “Lastly and most importantly, I want to thank my beautiful wife, for always believing in me, pushing me to be a better man. For loving me and for being selfless, for putting up with a lifestyle she knew nothing about. I want to thank her especially for making me a father to our beautiful daughter Eméile, and our beautiful son on the way!” Your cheeks are burning ferociously as the crowd gasps and turns to you, seeing you confirm the statement with your hands protectively grasping your stomach, a small bump that would’ve been otherwise noticeable, was now noticeable.

Past the point of caring about your make up, tears are falling down your cheeks, a sob choking you up as it gets stuck in your throat, you blow him a kiss as he finalises his speech with a repetition of his wedding vows. “Thank you for saving me, I wouldn’t be here without you cariño.” You were sobbing, clapping for your husband as your chest expands to make more room for your heart that is so full of love. He pulls you into a bear hug as he embraces you, his own tears of happiness falling on to your bare shoulder. The event coming to an end as they thank everyone for their presence. “With that ladies and gentlemen, we want to thank you all for joining us tonight. Please feel free to stick around for the after party to celebrate!”

Pedro pulls away from you, shaking the hands of his peers as they congratulate him, inviting him to party with them early into the morning, in which he declines. “No thank you, me and my beautiful wife are going to spend our time celebrating as a family, you all have a wonderful evening!”

“Dad you won! I knew you would! I’m so proud of you!” Your daughter Eméile exclaims excitedly as she sees the golden figure of his Oscar. She buries her face in his suit-clad chest and sighs. “You’re like, the coolest dad ever now. You know that right?” Pedro laughs and ruffles your daughters hair. “Uh I would hope so Em!” She smiles as she hugs you, gently approaching as she doesn’t want to hurt the baby, even if you assure her a hundred times it’s fine. “I’m so proud of you too ma.” You bite your lip to stop it’s wobble, “thank you baby. I’m proud of you too. I’m darn proud of us all!” You admit with a huff. “Why don’t we watch a movie with dinner and popcorn to wind down?” You and Em shoot each other a look and grin, Pedro raises an eyebrow at your scheming. “I vote ‘We can be Heroes’.” You snort as you purse your lips, “Agreed. Two votes babe you’re outnumbered.” You confirm with a smirk on your lips.

Pedro sighs, “alright, I’ll order takeout. Chinese?” There was no objection as you both murmur in agreement taking seat on the lounge.

“I don’t wanna hear a peep outta you two about how cringe this movie is.” You and Eméile both burst out laughing, “but dad it is kinda cringe.” Pedro sighs as he sits with the popcorn, the smell wafting into your nose as you salivating as your hand dives into the oversized bowl of steaming buttered popcorn as the credits roll in. “You’re 16, don’t you wanna watch like, Wednesday or something?” Em scoffs, “no, I wanna watch this,” she points to the tv and turns to her dad, “and since when did my age have anything to do with my interests?” You raise your eyebrows at Pedro and he gives you a look of confusion, shaking his head. “Teenagers are so confusing.” He mumbles to himself as you all settle into the couch, crunching on the popcorn simultaneously as you cuddle up to each other as you wait for your Chinese takeout to arrive.

What in the world did you ever feel nervous for? You think as you watch the movie on the screen, the effects making you laugh as you watch Pedro-Marcus fly through the sky on the tv screen.

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x fem reader #Pedro pascal rpf #Pedro pascal fic #pedro pascal at the oscars #dad Pedro pascal #dad x Pedro

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my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction · 8 months

Text

Price You Gotta Pay

Steven Grant X F!Reader • Rating: 18+ pals Masterlist• ao3• want to be tagged? | request info • Kinktober 2023 Masterlist • Day 1: Love Bites

Summary: Steven has his own plans for the evening.

Warnings: edging, p in v sex, oral sex (f receiving), kinda a little dom!Steven?, typos, please let me know if I've missed a warning!

Word Count: 1293

Originally, there had been a plan to the evening. Tasks that need to be completed. Chores you were going to get done.

But that had pretty much been thrown out of the window.

When you’d come back in from work you’d given Steven a quick kiss before you showered, itching to get the dirt of the tube and train from your skin, and changed.

You’d been in the middle of talking to him, explaining about some paperwork you should crack on with while you also asked him about what he fancied for dinner. And sent a last-minute email on your work phone.

Steven had crept up behind you, pressing close and kissing your neck. Whispering thinly veiled promises while he took your mobile out of your hands and coaxed you to bed.

In all honesty, you hadn’t taken that much convincing.

He muttered how much he had missed you during the day between pressing soft kisses to your skin and enticing you out of your comfy clothes.

“What’s got you so worked up?” You had whispered as he gently pulled off your top, pretending you weren’t as eager as he was.

“What do you mean?” He had asked innocently, but there was a devilish look in his eyes that told you differently.

“Did you see another photo of a particularly voluptuous statue?” You tease playfully, calling back to an incident that happened a few weeks prior.

Steven shoots you a dark warning look before continuing to kiss your skin. “No.” He mumbles but a slight flush dusts his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

“Are you sure?” You tease again.

Steven glares but smiles. “You’ll pay for that love.”

And pay you did.

You weren’t quite sure how many times you’d nearly cum. But you knew you’d definitely lost track around the fourth time.

“Steven,” you sob as you wiggle under him. “Please!”

He glances up at you from his spot between your thighs, still softly sucking your clit as you writhed. “Hmm?” He answers, purposefully sending still vibrations along you.

You mewl, tears on your cheeks as you try to grind up against his mouth. His forearm presses firmly against your stomach, pushing you back down into the mattress.

“Steven,” your breath catches as he swipes a board, flat lick slowly through your sopping folds. Your empty pussy clenches around nothing as he groans, his eyes rolling back in his head ever so slightly.

From this angle you can just see how his own hips move, steadily moving in languid circles as he rubs his aching cock against the bed.

The fact that as much as he was edging you, he was edging himself does little to comfort you in this state.

Your wetness saturates his skin, running down his chin to pool at his collarbone. The sheets beneath you are soaked, drenched with the physical evidence of your desperate need.

He runs another long lick through your folds, paying special attention to your clit as he laps at you.

Pleasure coils tightly in your stomach. Just a little more, just a little more and you would cum. Could taste it.

You bite your lips together, clenching your jaw hard to try to hide the wanton sounds that crave to escape.

Just a little more and-

You cry out in frustration as Steven pulls back and away from you, his dark eyes watching you as you try to follow his mouth.

“Steven, no, how did you-” you sob.

He chuckles and kisses your inner thigh, gently sucking another love bite into your soft skin before nuzzling you.

He lightly touches each bite mark, bruises looking so pretty in the neat little rows in which he had made them. Six in total. Six times you had been so, so close.

“Did you know love,” he swallows, almost managing to hide out wrecked it sounds. “That the number seven in ancient Egypt was considered a lucky number?”

“Steven,” no matter how much you love him and usually are enamoured with his fountain of knowledge, now just isn’t the time. “I-”

“Shh, love,” he teases, tracing your folds with the very tip of his finger and you moan.

He nips lightly at the most recent love bite he made before he continues. “As I was saying, seven is quite an important number. Seven scorpions guarded Isis, seven little stings. He gently pokes each love bite on your thighs, counting softly to six until he lightly circles your clit. “Seven. It represents perfection, completeness.” He laughs to himself. “It even sounds a bit like Steven, doesn’t it? Only one letter out.”

You bite your lip as you look at him desperately.

He leans up ever so slightly on his elbows and cocks his head to the side. “Do you want to cum, love?”

With a whine you nod, anguish leaking out of your every pour. It hurt. That deep, low need. Sparked along your nerves with every heartbeat.

“All you had to do is ask.” He grins and slides up your body, pressing his warm skin against yours. He places kisses along your ribs, scraping his teeth over your nipples and neck before he gets to your mouth and settles his hips between your legs. His cock aches as it presses against your core, the tip smearing precum along your lower stomach.

He groans softly, his eyebrows pinched together in bliss for a moment as his carefully mandated facade cracks just a little.

Steven tries to kiss you softly, but you’re too hungry for him. He moans happily as you slide your tongue into his mouth, tasting yourself on his lips. You urge him closer, not wanting even a fraction of space between your bodies.

Without breaking the kiss, Steven reaches down and guides himself to your aching pussy. For a moment he goes to rub his head through your folds to spread your slick and ease inside, but you buck up against him as he notches his fat tip at your entrance. And he just sliiiides in.

You cry out into his mouth, you’re so worked up and wet that he sinks deeper. Your walls gripping him tightly and pulling him into you.

Steven groans against you, his resolve breaking completely. “Hmm, love, fuck,” he can’t help himself and thrusts harshly completely sheathing himself inside. His right-hand grabs hold of your thigh, his fingers pressing against the love bites as he pushes your legs apart wider, gazing down as he spits you open.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he punctuates each word with a powerful buck, hitting dizzily deep and making your head spin. “Love,” he whines, his voice low, his eyes closed in concentration as sweat beads in his hair. “I’m- I’m not gonna last, I-”

You arch up against him, meeting every thrust of his hips with your own. His pubic bone brushed against your clit with every grind, the stretch of him electrified every cell and pushed you to the very edge.

“Gonna cum!” You manage to stammer out, your voice rising to what would have been an embarrassing pitch if you cared as pleasure takes over every thought. Stars explode behind your eyes, run down your veins and all you can do is bask in it and let it overwhelm you.

Steven moans, following you close behind as his hips stutter when you clench down on him and milk his cock for everything he’s worth. He cums deep, fucking his spend further inside before he collapses on top of you.

Softly he nuzzles into your neck, moving to make sure you’re not taking his full body weight. But you moan out a grumble and pull him back, wanting to feel him on top of you.

With a smile he kisses your cheek.

____________________________________

Thank you for reading! I'm not doing my normal tag list for kinktober as to not overwhelm anyone, please let me know if you'd like to be added/taken off.

@flightlessangelwings @steven-grants-world @lonelyisamyw-0love @eyelessfaces @angel-of-the-moons

If you'd like to be taken off the tag list please let me know here

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rashoumon-homo · 2 months

Text

The Bar Lupin (Dazai x Reader)

Dazai x Male Reader, SFW

-> Content Warnings: alcohol mention, hurt/comfort, grief, anxiety attacks, happy ending

-> 1.2k words

Author’s Note: long time no see! I just finished up my class the other day so now I have more free time to write, yay! This one is super tame, but I do have a NSFW Atsushi x Reader in the works so you’ll get your smut fix soon!

Request sent by @suru1990 - enjoy!

♡ ♡ ♡

Ever since Oda’s death, Dazai had avoided the Bar Lupin. It just felt too sentimental, like a holy place that would be tainted if he were to step over the threshold. There were too many memories tied up there. Ones where he was truly happy, which felt somehow worse to dwell on than the more traumatic memories did. When he was in hiding after leaving the Port Mafia, he had a reasonable enough excuse to avoid the place. After all, it was a place he had visited frequently and the Mafia was sure to look for him there. But then the years passed and he joined the Armed Detective Agency and settled in. The Port Mafia knew where he was and didn’t care anymore. He couldn’t lie to himself anymore about his reasons for staying away from the Bar Lupin.

Dazai made a habit of visiting Oda’s grave every year on the anniversary of his death. He’d just sit there in silence, leaning back against the gravestone while dappled sunlight shone on them both through the tree above. Sometimes he’d talk, but mostly he’d sit there quietly. He also had a ritual for spending Oda’s birthdays- getting blackout drunk on whiskey and sake and subsequently calling in sick to work for the next several days to sleep off the hangover. He jokingly called it a “hard reset” but his coworkers exchanged glances rather than laughing when he did.

He and Oda and Ango used to all spend each other’s birthdays at the Bar Lupin, laughing together about who knows what. It was on one of those birthdays that he’d tried whiskey for the first time.

It had now been four years since Oda had celebrated a birthday. Dazai tried not to think about those memories, but they rose to the top of his head like ramune bubbles, determined to resurface. He’d been fighting them all day. Now alone in his room, the weight of them made his chest and throat feel tight, so he threw back yet another cup of sake. And maybe his nose was tingling a little, like it does before he cries, but he was decidedly not drunk enough to deal with that. So he pulled on his coat and went for a walk to clear his head.

Turns out his half-drunk, emotional mind was a bitch. He stood outside the front door of the Bar Lupin, grinding his teeth. He felt so goddamn stupid for being afraid of a building. A building! He was an ex-mafioso. He’d seen hundreds, maybe thousands of people die in front of him in the most gruesome ways. And yet the ghosts of memories had the power to scare him away from the place for years. He was sick of it. His eyes pricked with tears and that was enough to push him forward, opening the door.

As Dazai walked down the stairs, he was surprised to see that the inside of the bar was nearly identical to the last time he’d been there. The decor was the same as always; the soft music just as he remembered. The calico cat that used to hang around was curled up on one of the barstools, sleeping. Even the smell was the same - it was like stepping back in time.

Dazai glanced down the row of barstools and froze. There you were, sitting in Oda’s usual seat. You were about the same height and wearing a similar trench coat, and for a horrifying moment, he thought you were Oda. Startled, he stumbled backwards, bumping into the wall with a muffled thump. You looked over in surprise, but the attention was lost in the haze of adrenaline and humiliation clouding Dazai’s perception.

It wasn’t Oda. Of course it wasn’t. How fucking stupid could he be? Tears sprung to Dazai’s eyes and he swallowed thickly. God, he hated crying.

You stood up and started walking over.

“Stay back!” Dazai warned, flinching away as he saw you approach. He felt the air shift as you crouched down beside him.

“Here, take this,” you said.

He hesitantly lifted his head, gaze flitting to your yellow converse - definitely not something Oda would have worn. He glanced further up, to the handkerchief in your extended hand. Your eyes were softened with concern, but not pity. At least there was that. He took the handkerchief.

You sat on the ground beside him and leaned against the wall, then closed your eyes. “Slow, deep breaths,” you said. “In for 4…” You demonstrated for him, not caring whether he was actually paying attention. “Then hold for 4,” you continued. “Out for four…” You let your breath out slowly through your mouth. “And hold for another 4.” You peeked over at him and were pleased to see him breathing along with you.

The two of you sat there, breathing calmly, for the next few minutes.

Dazai shifted and ran his fingers through his hair. “Thanks,” he said quietly.

“Doing better now?” you asked.

He finally looked you in the face and wow he had the most beautiful brown eyes you’d ever seen. And long eyelashes that glistened with tears. His nose was a bit red, and his eyes still looked puffy, but somehow the vulnerability was attractive in itself.

“Can I buy you a drink?” he asked finally. He blushed, then quickly added, “To repay you for helping me.”

You smiled and stood up, then held out your hand to help him to his feet. “I’d like that,” you said.

Now that he looked closer, Dazai could see the hint of a tattoo just under your collar. And the hand you’d extended to help him up was covered in rings, your nails coated in chipped black nail polish. When you smiled at him, it was wide and genuine and a little crooked. You were nothing like Oda.

“Actually,” Dazai said suddenly, “maybe we can get coffee instead? I’ve already had a bit to drink and this place just doesn’t feel right anymore.”

“Um… sure!” you said, warming up to the idea. “I’m new to the area, so maybe you can show me around on the way!”

As the two of you chattered together and walked up the stairs, Dazai couldn’t help but feel lighter. Somehow, that was all the closure he needed. He was looking towards the future now; not giving the past any more weight than it deserved.

Dazai sneakily grabbed your hand as you walked through the front door, smiling to himself as you blushed into the collar of your coat. “You blushing?” he teased.

“It’s cold out!” you insisted, only turning pinker. He laughed at you and the two of you started down the sidewalk. After a few seconds, he spoke again.

“I’m glad I met you,” he said. “Feels like fate or something.” His tone made it hard to tell if he was being genuine or just messing around, but he wouldn’t meet your eyes when he said it.

“Hmm… I think it’s a bit early to say for sure,” you said playfully. “But I’m glad I met you too.” You squeezed his hand and smiled at him. The two of you turned the corner and the sign for the bar was out of sight.

♡ ♡ ♡

Tag list: @suru1990, @little-miss-chaoss

If you want to join the tag list, send me a dm!

Back to Masterlist

#rashoumon writes #dazai x reader #dazai x you #dazai x y/n #bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai #dazai bsd #dazai x male reader #dazai x m!reader #dazai x gender neutral reader #dazai x gn!reader #bsd x reader #bsd x y/n #bsd x you #bsd x male reader #reader insert

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butterfly-indulgence · 8 months

Text

[REDACTED] with an Idol!Angel

aka [REDACTED] being nasty on main.

CW: Parasocial behavior, obsessive behavior, stalking, mentions of online bullying/harassment ([REDACTED]'s an expert in canceling someone)

As a (crazy) fan:

SFW

[REDACTED] is your biggest fan. And no, that is not an exaggeration. From his perfect attendance to all your lives and events to making several shrines dedicated to you, no one has them beat.

When I say shrine, I don't mean just a small corner in their apartment. We're talking about rooms filled with your merch, such as your post cards, autographs, posters, plushies, pins… he has it all.

They're very well-known throughout the online community. Other fans always see him on your posts and if you take a look at their profile, all you would see are posts relating to you and his "delulu moments" (screaming, keysmashing, reaction images and just general lovemailing). You're his star, his precious angel, and you always will be. You shine the brightest in their eyes.

[REDACTED] has bought all of your albums too. His music player is filled with your songs, and he's the type of person to blast it at 3 am while he's hacking. He's the only one living on one of the floors of his apartment building, so he's not disturbing anyone, is he? Either way, what's anyone gonna do? Arrest him? Good luck. He gets away with worse crimes than disturbing the peace.

Your love songs are his favorite. They make him feel giddy inside (and a bit sad. He wishes you were there to sing those sweet words to him face-to-face.)

Branching off from that, you bet he's buying voice packs. They get to hear your lovely voice? All the time if theywanted to? Just take their money.

He's been your fan ever since you debuted and he's very proud of his perfect attendance to all your lives and events. He always has front row seats, and he goes to the events ridiculously early. He's always the first one in line. Other hardcore fans know him and even asked him to join their fan club once. Which he declined. He doesn't want to watch other people gush and fantasize about his angel. The thought of thousands of people vying for your love already makes his blood boil.

You will inevitably recognize [REDACTED] due to their constant presence in events. Seeing someone with so much love and dedication is enough to warm your heart, so you make sure to thank him and give him some extra fanservice. If [REDACTED] didn't have any self control, he might have collapsed then and there. (God they want to hug you and kiss you and spoil you and treat you well and marry you and-)

Many people in the fan community jokingly label them as "that insane angel simp", but they have no idea just how far [REDACTED] is willing to go for you. He can easily obtain any type of information he wants so naturally, he knows where you live. He already set up hidden cameras in your home too. He loves watching you through the cameras; it's one of his favorite past times because he sees the real you. The real angel behind the flawless idol persona. He knows your likes, your dislikes (and he often finds out that the information you give out during interviews are mostly lies; you tend to choose quirky or unique answers instead of your real preferences - oh, you don't like this particular food? But Angel, you look so happy eating it at home after your concert <3), your hobbies, and little habits that even you don't seem to notice. What he doesn't like is when you collapse on your bed after a long day and just… cry. He hates seeing you in pain and wants to comfort you during your saddest moments, but he can't, so he directs his attention elsewhere to give you some privacy. Expect a gift and a fanmail filled with love and support in the next few days. It's his way of cheering you up.

[REDACTED] is one of those brutal fans that would attack anyone who sends you any hate or attempts to destroy your reputation. He has tons of burner accounts at his disposal, and he's not afraid of using them to bully, harass and threaten your haters. He won't stop until their online presence disappears completely. It's why your fan community is so peaceful. Because [REDACTED] shuts the haters up quickly.

[REDACTED] is perhaps your most dangerous stalker… but they're a great repellant for other potentially dangerous people. (A blessing or a curse. View it however you want.) As mentioned above, haters will not touch you, and your information will be under [REDACTED]'s lock and key. Personal information like your address? No one will be able to dig it up no matter how hard they try. Do you have a past controversy you desperately want buried? Consider the evidence deleted. Due to him pulling the strings behind the scenes, in the eyes of the public, you really are just a pure and wholesome person with nothing to stain your name.

NSFW

[REDACTED] indulges himself a lot with fantasies of you. Just the thought of you is enough to get him going, really. Because of the cameras they put all over your home, they have a full view of your most private moments, especially when you're pleasuring yourself on your bed. It's thrilling how he gets to watch you do something so 'unpure', unbefitting of the idol image you carefully crafted. He would definitely stroke himself while watching you, moaning your name as their pleasure builds up. (Though if he hears you moan someone's name, expect [REDACTED] to do some research… and maybe pay the person a visit later.)

If [REDACTED] ever got to fuck you in your idol costume, he thinks his soul might just ascend to heaven (or descend to hell. Whatever.) It gets their possessive streak going. Your pretty lips, spouting words of love on stage while behind closed doors, your attention is all on him? You're giving him genuine words of love through your hazy mind with a blissed out expression on your face? He's done for.

He also masturbates using your pictures, and by the end, they would be crumpled up and stained. Honestly though? His room is heavily decorated with your merch so he can just grab something random off his shelves and he would still get off on it.

[REDACTED] can get pretty creative when he's going into the woohoo zone and he has several toys he uses often. You're not there (and maybe you never will be), so he has to make something work.

#14dwy #14 days with you #14dwy redacted #14 days with you redacted #alternate universe #redacted #might make a part 2 #my writing

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f1letters · 1 year

Text

bejeweled | ln4

"and I miss you, but I miss sparkling"

summary: after a triple-header where they couldn't see each other, things got even stranger when her boyfriend seemed totally uninterested in spending time with her. so, she took matters into her own hands

warning: a little bit of angst, but fluff ending, mentions of a long-distance relationship, Lando being an uninterested boyfriend, reader feeling ignored and worthless, reader being petty, mentions of alcohol, swearing, reader trying to make Lando jealous, mentions of McLaren's bad 2022 season and Danny leaving the team (crying 😭), not proofread

pairing: lando norris x reader

word count: 2.7k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past.

masterlist

Baby love, I think I've been a little too kind

Didn't notice you walkin' all over my peace of mind

In the shoes I gave you as a present

Puttin' someone first only works when you're in their top five

And by the way, I'm goin' out tonight

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.'

Y/N couldn't keep count of the number of times she had heard this phrase being said during the past two years.

She prayed that people were right. That distance would make their relationship stronger, their time together more special, their appreciation for each other bigger.

She hoped her heart would mend every time he came back home but in all honesty, she just felt... lonely.

From: babe

only a few more days and the torture is over, can't wait to kiss you again gorgeous, miss you 🧡

Y/N read Lando's text over and over again, daydreaming about their reunion after so long apart, as the driver had three races in a row at Spa, Zandvoort and Monza.

It didn't matter how many times Lando called or texted. How many times he expressed how much he missed her. How many times he said how excited he was to see her again.

In the end, it was exhausting spending her days simply waiting for him to be there.

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I could still say, "I don't remember"

Suddenly, the jingling of keys on the other side of the door caught her attention. Y/N turned towards the entrance where she saw the image of her boyfriend appear through the darkness of the night that filled the apartment.

Quickly getting back on her feet, the girl rushed to him, hugging the boy desperate to return to her arms. His body relaxed as soon as it made contact with hers and Lando let him pull her as close to him as possible.

"Fuck," Lando whispered against his girlfriend's forehead, whose tears of relief now streamed freely down her cheeks. "I can't believe I'm finally back home."

"God, I swear it was the worst weeks ever." The girl confessed, although it was common to be apart for a long time since her work did not allow her to follow him most of the time. "I've missed you so much, Lan. So much."

Grabbing her gently by the sides of her neck, the driver looked straight into her bright, tired eyes. "Me too, baby. But now we have two weeks to ourselves."

For a moment everything fell into place. But it was only a matter of time before it all came crashing down again.

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

After spending the night lying next to the boy she loved, Y/N couldn't control all the excitement she felt inside her chest.

Very early in the morning, the young woman got out of bed, leaving the sleeping man behind, and headed to the kitchen where she went all out to celebrate his first morning back in Monaco.

With the utmost care and love, she cooked just about everything: scrambled eggs, bacon, toast, pancakes, you name it. And as soon as everything was ready, Y/N returned to the room and jumped on top of the British man, now awake on his phone.

"Good morning, sunshine!" The girl said, as she hugged his hips and laid her head on his stomach. "I made the best breakfast ever just for you, baby. So you better be hungry."

Her laughter was quickly interrupted by the boy's surprising coolness towards her. "Good morning, but I think I'll pass. I still feel super tired from the flight, so I'm going to stay in bed a little longer." Lando set his phone back on the bedside table and, running a hand over the top of her head as an act of apology, continued. "I hope you don't mind, love. It's just for today."

It's just for today, he said.

The next day, still under the wave of happiness, Y/N tried her luck again and decided to approach her boyfriend again to make plans, now that he was already feeling more energetic and recharged.

Lando spent the morning jumping around the house, so when Y/N saw him walk back into the room, she dropped to her knees in her seat, turned around and leaned on the back of the couch.

"Lan, what if we went out to dinner at that Thai place we went to last month?" She asked, her head turning slightly as she remembered their meal. "I swear I'm still thinking about that Pad Thai."

Lando continued his way to the kitchen, opening the fridge to get some water. "Hmm, maybe another time. Don't feel like going out."

And with only a few words, he disappeared again into another room of the house.

On day 3, the girl was caught off guard when she saw her boyfriend with a backpack on his back and his hand on the doorknob.

"Hey, where are you going?" She questioned, curious.

"Just going to the gym with Carlos." He replied, eyes on the phone in his other hand.

"I thought you were tired." She blurted out. At that moment, the persistent girl decided to be direct and confront him. "Is there something wrong? You've been so distant lately."

She had barely seen him even though the two of them shared the same house. It was getting embarrassing how much she tried to engage in conversation with him, only to get rejected every single time.

The driver just spat out a string of words, including 'busy with business' and 'training', but nothing soothed the uneasiness she felt in the pit of her stomach.

Baby boy, I think I've been too good of a girl

Did all the extra credit, then got graded on a curve

I think it's time to teach some lessons

I made you my world, have you heard?

I can reclaim the land

And I miss you

But I miss sparklin'

It just didn't make any sense.

What happened to the 'week to ourselves? To all the 'I miss you' and 'I can't wait to see you' he said?

It got to the point where she was even starting to question every time he told her he loved her.

A week passed, and in a last attempt, Y/N walked up to her boyfriend and placed her hands on his shoulders, placing a small kiss on his cheek.

"How about we watch a movie, cuddled a bit on the couch…?" She suggested, whispering close to his ear.

Lando placed a hand over one of his girlfriend's hands, looking back to meet her gaze. "Sorry babe, but I'm going to stream with the guys now. Maybe later."

Maybe another time. Maybe later.

She had been a little too kind and she was done playing nice.

It was time to teach him some lessons.

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I could still say, "I don't remember"

Y/N entered her room and confidently walked to her closet. She knew exactly the garment she was looking for and as soon as she laid eyes on her shiny bejeweled dress, she picked it up.

Leaving the clothes she wore behind on the floor, she changed into the stunning dress and sat in front of her mirror, curling her hair and doing her makeup.

Her eyes ended up dark and smoky, perfectly adorning the determined and vengeful look on her face.

Grabbing her small Prada bag, Y/N walked to the room where Lando was already streaming, catching the driver's attention.

"Hey, I'm already live." He warned her, as he turned to see his girlfriend. Laying his eyes on his girlfriend all dressed up, a nervous shiver ran down his spine. "Where are you going looking all polished up?"

"Don't wait for me for dinner," She answered coldly, even though she knew the people in the comments were going to have a field day with this. "And by the way, I'm going out tonight."

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

As soon as she walked into the room, she made the whole place stop with the shimmer of her dress under the spotlight.

If Lando wasn't going to give her the love and attention she deserved, she sure as hell was going to give it to herself.

Y/N was finally done with letting her worth be determined by a man, even if he was supposed to be the love of her life.

Sapphire tears on my face

Sadness became my whole sky

But some guy said my aura's moonstone

Just 'cause he was high

Walking towards the bar, the young woman couldn't help noticing the eyes that fell on the fascinating and beautiful image that she was.

At that moment, although she missed him and the good times of their relationship, she was reminded of how much she missed sparkling.

Y/N ordered two tequila shots and drank them without missing a second. She now felt prepared to start the night, leaving her problems behind.

Dancing as she made her way to the middle of the floor, the girl began to sway her hips to the music, between the hot bodies glued together in the room.

Tonight was all about her.

And we're dancin' all night

And you can try to change my mind

But you might have to wait in line

What's a girl gonna do?

A diamond's gotta shine

Back home, Lando couldn't shake the feeling of apprehension and anxiety that gripped him.

As much as he tried to keep his good spirits and attention on his friends, his followers and the game, his mind was elsewhere: her.

His eyes roamed the chat as he interacted with some of his fans until one of them made his heart stop beating for a second.

teamlandofewtrell: have you guys seen Y/N photos clubbing? I smell trouble in paradise lol

The man cleared his throat, trying to maintain his posture. "Guys, I have to go now, but I'll see you very soon!"

Without further explanation, Lando grabbed his coat and the keys to his McLaren and headed towards her.

And as soon as he entered the club, he immediately found her.

The furious boy walked over to her, grabbed her arm and pulled her to a more sheltered corner, only to find her surprised and upset eyes.

"What the fuck were you thinking?!" He shouted over the music, unconcerned by prying ears. "First you make me look like an idiot on stream, then I find out you're alone in a club doing who knows what. Are you all right in the head, Y/N?!"

"You're worried now, are you?" The girl laughed sarcastically. "That's fucking rich."

"You have to be fucking kidding me. It has to be." Lando ran his restless hands through his hair nervously. "All because I didn't want to see a movie with you today? That's it?"

"Today, of course. The problem is from today." She continued her ironic tone. "You know what, Lando? It's about time you realized that just because I made you my world doesn't mean I can't claim the land."

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

And when I meet the band

They ask, "Do you have a man?"

I could still say, "I don't remember"

Lando was shocked by her confrontational words, as it was a side she rarely showed.

"Stop this nonsense, Y/N." Lando snapped, gripping her arm with some force. "Let's go home now, and tomorrow we'll talk when you come to your senses."

Out of nowhere, a man approached the couple. "Hey, is everything okay here? Do you need some help, babe?" He asked her.

Y/N recognized him as the vocalist of the band that was performing when she first arrived at the scene.

"It's okay, thanks." She replied, freeing her arm from her boyfriend's hold and letting her burning eyes lay on Lando's face. "This man was about to leave."

"If you need to come with me, feel free to join, gorgeous." The singer said, looking her up and down. "Do you have a man? 'Cause if you don't, I sure could be yours for tonight."

Even though she was uninterested in the man's suggestive proposition, she couldn't pass up an opportunity to entice the driver. "I don't remember."

"She has a fucking man, now get the fuck off." Lando spoke out aggressively, having no patience left for her foolishness.

Familiarity breeds contempt

Don't put me in the basement

When I want the penthouse of your heart

Diamonds in my eyes

I polish up real, I polish up real nice

"You have the nerve to show up here playing the role of the victim when all you did this whole week was ignore me," Y/N yelled, losing her mind. "Day after day, I made a fool of myself and tried to approach you, to make plans with you, to do the things I know you like to see if you would change your shitty attitude but nothing."

"From the second you arrived, the only thing I got from you was a cold shoulder and indifference. And honestly, I'm fed up, fed up with your behaviour when all I did was wait for you, all alone and miserable, while you fulfilled your dreams."

Lando remained glued to the ground, unable to move as he tried to assimilate all the angry words she spat in his direction.

"So if you have anything else to say to try and ruin my night, you might have to wait in line because I don't have the time to do so right now."

And we're dancin' all night

And you can try to change my mind

But you might have to wait in line

What's a girl gonna do? What's a girl gonna do?

I polish up nice

Eyes to the floor in embarrassment, the driver gently grabbed her hand. "You're right, I'm so sorry, love."

"What?" She blurted out, not believing the sudden change in him.

"You're right, I've been an absolute prick to you lately," The boy looked into her eyes, his gaze filled with regret and sorrow. "Those last three weeks weren't just bad because I was away from you. It was bad news after bad news and I just ended up taking it out on you unfairly."

"Lan, you know you can talk to me about anything." She softened and stroked his hand. "What's wrong?"

"Everything, honestly." He sighed, saddened. "The car is shit most of the time, I can't seem to get out of 7th place ever, Danny is leaving the team next season and, as if it couldn't get any worse, I spent all weekend getting asked about it like I had some power over the matter."

Y/N knew her partner was feeling especially down over losing yet again another teammate he really cared about, so Lando's anguish came as no surprise.

"I'm sorry, Y/N, really." Lando apologized again. "You didn't deserve all of this."

"Baby, I'm here for you. Always. Through thick and thin." Y/N brought her lips to his, letting her hands grip his curly hair as she leaned into his kiss. "Let's have some fun, dance a little, and make up for lost time, what do you think?"

"Lead the way, gorgeous." Lando kissed her again before she led him to the centre of the floor.

Gathered in their bubble of love again, Y/N, who once shone like a jewel, now shone like a true diamond with the light of her life reflecting on her side.

Best believe I'm still bejeweled

When I walk in the room

I can still make the whole place shimmer

taglist: @dan3avocado @starxqt @roseinnej @spiidergirlsworld @ccloaned @hotpigeon22 @dr3lover @lovelytsunoda @primadonnasdream @luxebeautystyle @wallfloweriism @ilivefortheleague @gwynethhberdara @satellitelh @adavenus @audreyscodes @wifeoflucyboynton @th6ccnsp6cyy @classifiedsblog @flyingmushroomss @motylekrozi @claramllera @gabrielamaex @handsupforamiracle @pierre-gasssllyy @lorenaloveslewis

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(taglist continues in the comments)

thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

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