#finally finished this trilogy that took like all summer and now i don’t know what to do with myself | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yessoupy · 4 years

Text

the @imetyouonljpodcast episode this week gave me lots of thoughts and feelings about star wars. more like, reminded me of all my thoughts and feelings around my first fandom. thus, I decided to write my own journey into and throughout star wars fandom, and what it means to me. buckle up, this story spans decades.

my very first memory of anything star wars-related is a yoda puppet that my grandmother had. it had to be from the original run of the movies, because I was maybe 4 in my first memory of it, and i was born in '86. my sisters and I loved it, and one of our cousins was deathly scared of it so we'd chase him around the house with it.

my second memory of star wars was going to the movie store with my dad and sisters and seeing our favorite yoda on the cover of a VHS. "yoda yoda yoda! daddy, it's yoda!!! can we get it?" we were holding up the display cover for return of the jedi. dad said no, we couldn't get that one yet because we had to watch them in order. so we rented a new hope and all I remember was falling asleep while artoo and threepio were trundling across the tatooine desert sands. at five I guess I was too young.

in early 1997 the special editions of the original trilogy were aired in theaters and I was in 4th grade. dad took us to see one of them (I think empire, at some point we'd finally finished a new hope). at school that grading period I sat next to a boy named mark and he noticed I was drawing little x-wing silhouettes on my paper. "you like star wars too?" he asked. when I said yes, he declared that because of my name, he was going to call me skywalker. that's the name on the back of my high school letter jacket.

in fall of 1998 I started the 6th grade and I came home from school one day to a hardbound book my mom had checked out for me from the library. heir to the empire by timothy zahn. mom pointed out where it said on the cover it was a trilogy, and I could get the other books when I finished this one. she hadn't found the young jedi knights series for me. she'd checked out a GROWN-UP star wars book.

in spring of 1999 the phantom menace came out and my parents' friend took me to see it on opening day because neither of them were free and I HAD to go that day. later on that year she took me to a star wars exhibit at the museum of fine arts. that was also the first time I saw a monet and a renoir. the exhibit had costumes (real costumes!!!) from the original trilogy and the newest prequel. I bought a book about the myth of star wars in the museum gift shop.

I read every expanded universe book our local library had, which was a lot. I had a lot to catch up on, too, since heir to the empire had been published in 1992. you never saw me at school without a star wars book. I read while walking in the hallways, even. in 6th grade I read during lunch, since I was in varsity orchestra with 7th and 8th graders and was terribly shy. they'd tell me I should socialize at lunch, not read my books, but... I wanted to read. I had a lot to learn. I have a lot to know.

I was in 7th grade when I read vector prime, the first in the new series. my first class of the day was science, and the boy I had a crush on was in that class. we had DEAR time at the beginning of that class - drop everything and read. not a hardship for me. that day, I read the part of the book where chewbacca was killed. I looked up, astonished. heartbroken. I locked eyes with the boy I liked. he nodded at the book and I showed him the cover. he nodded sympathetically. "they killed chewie," I whispered. he said "I know."

I wrote original characters in star wars fan fiction when I was about 13. I had an internet friend named rachel who lived in brisbane. then there was dave and 'roswell' who gave me ideas for my story. I loved being able to talk about the wide world of star wars with other people. we used aol instant messenger and email. my username in those days had 'skywalker' in it. I am pretty sure we met in an aol chatroom. I didn't find much of use on the official star wars site and I have probably visited it fewer than 10 times since 1999.

I read those books all through middle and high school. they were my christmas presents and my birthday presents. I moved into our family beach house after college. it sounds really nice but I didn't have running water because it was the summer after Ike hit. I would go to the used book store on 23rd street and buy a stack of star wars books and read them while I waiting for calls to interview for a teaching position. weekends I'd go into town to stay at a friend's house and help her with wedding stuff. I'd shower there, too. that's where my new stash of star wars books started, with me catching up on the legacy of the force series I hadn't read in college and then finishing up through the fate of the jedi as those came out. I felt that I had grown up with these characters. I remembered when kyp was just an orphan han rescued, when jacen and jaina were five years old, when corran horn had no wife, no kids, and was just finding out who his family was. I had capital o opinions about what color lightsaber i would have and why (silver; bc corran), I knew the geography of the galaxy and where everyone was from and my favorite planet was dathomir because women ruled it. I knew all of these characters' histories and motivations and the difficult decisions they'd made and had to live with. I loved them.

i never ventured into the online fandom space for star wars, even after I'd found other online fandom spaces, because I didn't feel like there was anything anyone could add to it for me. I was satisfied with all I'd gotten. sure, favorite characters had been killed (after chewie, the one who stung most was Mara, luke's wife), but people die. and in such a long-running series spanning so many years and trillions of miles of space... you come to expect it.

people would ask me ALL THE TIME when the sequels were coming out and I said never. then, disney bought star wars. initially I was excited (tears of joy happy) to have sequels confirmed. my mind raced, imagining a trilogy centered on the events surrounding jacen's descent to the dark side. the original actors would be the right age for that. who could play jacen?

then, the announcement came that the canon was now 'legends' and they wouldn't be taking any of it into account when writing the sequels BUT that didn't mean we wouldn't see old canon favorites. they announced adam driver as the villain and I thought "jacen." I held onto the idea that this knowledge I had, these years of knowing these stories, would still be worth something. that I'd be able to add new information to my mental bookshelves and maps. that my universe would expand further.

the force awakens was a bitter disappointment. I was upset from the crawl, leia's title making it clear to me that she wasn't chief of state, she wasn't the mother to three children, han wasn't her husband, and all of her history I'd grown to love really was gone. what I saw was the older version of a woman I'd met when she was 18 and hadn't seen her since her early twenties. I didn't know her.

I didn't know the galaxy, either. starting with the new jedi order series, a map of the galaxy was included in the front of each book with the planets named so you knew where everything was happening. the new galaxy was bare. it was small and knowable. while the hosnian prime system was destroyed in the movie, I'd never known it, and all the planets I DID know were similarly blasted out of memory. where was dathomir and its fierce warrior witches? if their planets were gone so were their people.

as the movie trudged on, a retelling of a new hope, I kept thinking, "at least let his name be jacen." I hung my hopes on this sith character being han and leia's son and sharing that name of the boy I'd known and the man who'd grown up to turn to the dark side. at that first shout of 'BEN!' I was angry. Ben?? that was the name of LUKE'S son! that was MARA'S child! Ben??? with three letters jacen solo and ben skywalker were also dead to the galaxy.

I know, I know. I should get over it. I AM thankful for poe dameron. the x-wing books were always my favorite. poe was familiar to me the way other new characters weren't. he was part of the new republic navy. I knew what that was. he flew an x-wing. I knew what that was.l and what company manufactured them. he was from yavin IV, I knew where that was and what it looked like. finn was a stormtrooper, yes, but the empire had not stolen children to be raised as stormtroopers. they were recruited like any other position. his story wasn't real to me, it wasn't something I could easily accept. and the idea that the new republic just LET the first order rise? leia's new republic would NEVER. but leia wasn't chief of state in this universe. leia hadn't had that power.

I read a lot of articles about the force awakens and the reactions to it, and never saw myself in any of them. the star wars fanboys whom I'd never known were painted as being angry because their fan knowledge was useless and "boo-hoo poor widdle fanboys" they would be mocked, rightfully. but that's why I was angry, ultimately. everyone I knew and loved was dead. worse, they'd never existed. "what do you think will happen?" some unsuspecting coworker would ask. I'd shrug, but inside I was yelling "who the fuck knows! my favorite characters don't exist anymore. nothing I know as this person you know as SKYWALKER means anything anymore."

it only got worse from there. One day I spent four hours figuring out how far the casino planet was from the drifting ships in the last jedi and doing math to figure out how long it would REALLY take to get there, using old canon star wars physics. I couldn't suspend my disbelief during that movie. everything was wrong. (the other space physics quibble I had was from TFA when poe is using comms while in hyperspace, and dropping out on a command and not... when nav told him to?? you'd fly right through a star!! were they HOVERING in hyperspace? none of it made sense.) I knew too much and too little to enjoy it.

TROS was a narrative mess already retconning new canon and I decided that I would only keep what I liked about the new canon (poe and his family) and pretend the old canon is all there is. one day I'll write the story of poe being part of the storied rogue squadron being sent by leia's new republic to put down the fascist upstarts at the edge of the unknown regions. one day.

one more quick story -- i met my college friend’s three kids for the first time when the oldest was 6. i’d sent a toy lightsaber as a gift when he was born, because i believe every child should get their first lightsaber from a skywalker, and his father had shown him the movies when he turned 4. when i walked into the house i said hello and he said, “i have some questions about star wars.”

we sat on the couch with the tfa visual dictionary, a book he’d gotten out of the library. every question he had was an excellent question, and i couldn’t answer any of them. “why does his lightsaber look like that? and why does he have the extra blades?”

“well, kiddo, let’s see what it says here about how lightsabers are made. i used to know all about it, but they changed everything on me.”

---

what i love about star wars since disney bought it:

poe dameron, cassian andor (and all of rogue one, i got over the fact that the movie wouldn’t be about rogue squadron it was PERFECT), solo (a fucking DELIGHT), the mandalorian, and i’m sure the cassian andor live action will be amazing and i’ll love it.

#star wars #fandom thoughts #i've just spent SO MUCH of my life being a star wars fan #and being perfectly happy to describe myself as such #edit i tried a read more but it didn't work so sorrryyyyyyyy

34 notes · View notes

heyyyharry · 4 years

Text

Chapter 1: Blast from the Past

(from the My Girl Trilogy: Stay Mine)

…in which the ghosts from their past come knocking on their doors.

Word count: 6.5k

AU: actor!Harry, older!Harry, younger!Y/N, (4-year age gap).

Wattpad link

I wrote this chapter before Eroda/Adore You came out so the goldfish thing was totally a coincidence lmao.

When Harry was six, he had a goldfish.

He'd asked for a dog for his birthday, but his mother didn't think he was responsible enough to take care of a dog, so she bought him a fish instead. Despite not being as cool as a puppy, the goldfish was actually a great companion, and Harry loved him a lot. He called him Mr. Finny.

Mr. Finny died a week after coming home. It took Harry a month to get over Mr. Finny's death for it was his first experience of losing something that meant a lot to him.

He was too little when his father went away. He was four, and his sister was six — the same age as him when he lost Mr. Finny. So he guessed it had been rough for both his mum and Gemma to deal with such a big loss. He'd had nightmares for a whole week after losing his goldfish, imagine losing a person.

Losing things were easier because things couldn't walk away from you and if you couldn't find them, you could just replace them with something new and better. With people, you couldn't do that. Once you'd lost them, you could lose them forever. Just like goldfishes, even if Harry had found another one that looked exactly the same, it just wasn't Mr. Finny.

Ruby was his second experience of loss which had taken a heavy toll on him. He had lost a part of himself when he lost her. But then he found a better piece to fill that empty space when he returned to Holmes Chapel for Y/N's mother's funeral. They had both lost someone they loved, but they found each other, and now they were exactly where they wanted to be.

They had spent the last month of the summer travelling around Europe after attending Niall's concert in Italy and a friend's movie premiere in Paris. Y/N had only agreed to go because she couldn't say no to Paris, but she was genuinely happy during the trip, which made him happy too.

That was only until summer was over.

There was no perfect timing for finding out your loved one had passed away, but it certainly shouldn't have been at the airport just five minutes after he'd landed in London. It was Gemma who called and broke the news to him. She said their mother was devastated and they needed him to come home, so he immediately called his chauffeur to pick him up at the airport, and of course, Y/N wouldn't let him go alone.

Harry wasn't very close to his stepdad, but he loved the guy because he'd made his mother happy. Now she cried herself to sleep every night like she used to when Harry's father left. Harry had never thought he'd see her like that again, but he guessed it had taught him something new about loss.

Mr. Finny died because Harry had overfed him. He lost Ruby the same way, by loving her too much. When he tried not to love someone more than they loved him, he ended up losing his Bambi. Then there was his mum and his stepdad, who'd had a beautiful and healthy marriage, until death stepped in and took him away. Loss had no expiration date, people did. And no matter how old you were or how hard you tried, you would keep losing people anyway.

"Harry, wake up! Wake up!"

The first thing Harry saw when he opened his eyes was two bright eyes staring right back at him. He blinked fast, trying to get a grip on reality when he felt his girlfriend snuggle her face into his neck.

"You're safe, baby. I'm here," she said as he pulled her closer.

It was the third time that week Harry had had a nightmare. The first time was when he'd just got back to London after the funeral. The second time was just two nights ago.

"Is it the same dream?" Y/N asked. She seemed very concerned, so he gave her a smile and pressed his lips against her forehead.

"You didn't even leave a note this time," he said. "I came to your place and someone else was living there."

"No wonder you kept asking, 'where is she?' in your sleep." His girlfriend chuckled as she combed her fingers through his unruly hair. He loved it when she did that, it always calmed him down.

"I'm sorry I woke you up," he said with a pouty face.

"Nah, woke up a long time ago. I was watching you sleep."

"Creepy."

"Shut up. You love me."

"I do." Harry grinned as she got on top, straddling his waist and holding his face between her palms.

"You know, you can talk to me about anything that's bothering you, no matter how trivial you think it is."

"I know." He nodded. "I've been stressed out lately, that's all."

Y/N didn't seem to believe him but she knew him too well to continue asking questions. She leaned down, her lips brushing against his and her hand going from his chest, down to his belly button, and under the covers. His soft gasp turned into a moan, making her smile devilishly.

"Let me help you relax, yeah?" she whispered into his mouth, tasting every sound he made while pumping him agonisingly slow. "God, you're so hard. Is this for me?"

"Fuck, Bambi."

"Say you're hard for me."

"I'm—I'm hard for you."

"Hmm," she hummed and bit lightly onto his bottom lip. "It's so big in my hand, always makes me feel so full. God, I want your big cock in my tight—"

"Move in with me."

If a four-word sentence could instantly kill the mood, that would be it.

"What?" Y/N's face was almost paralyzed when she pulled away.

Harry had blurted out many things he shouldn't have said during sex with other people, like those couple of times he had called out her name instead of whoever he was with. But never had he been more embarrassed than this moment right now.

Cheeks turning red, the man sat up with his back resting against the headboard. His girlfriend was kneeling in front of him with her hands on her knees and waiting for him to break the silence.

"I'm sorry, I—I didn't...didn't mean that."

"You didn't?"

"Well, no. I mean...yeah, I did, but I—"

What the fuck are you rambling on about, Styles?

"I-I do want that. I want you to move in with me," he blurted with his eyes squeezed shut and when he finally opened them, she was staring at her hands, not at him anymore. He knew that question had come out at the worst moment, but he hadn't expected her reaction to be like this.

"You—you want me to live here?" She raised both eyebrows, pointing down. "In this house?"

"Yeah. I mean, you're basically living here now. It's not like anything has to change."

"It changes a lot, H. I love my flat and I...well, I just—You know..." Now it was her turn to stutter. "I mean, are you...sure this is what you want? We've only been together for three months."

"We've known each other for twelve years, Bambi."

"Still..."

It wasn't exactly an answer, but he had a feeling that it was. To say the least, he was disappointed.

"Look, it's okay. Let's just...just forget I ever asked. I'm sorry for making this weird."

"No, no! I—"

When she paused, he guessed she was trying to come up with a reasonable explanation for how she'd reacted, not an answer. But after a moment, she glanced back up and told him, "can I have more time to think?"

"Of course." He nodded quickly. "Take as much time as you need."

So that was a maybe, he assumed. A maybe was still better than a no, even though most of the time when someone said maybe, they actually meant to say no.

"You know I love you, right?" she spoke after a quiet moment. "Because I do. A lot. It's just—"

Before she could finish the sentence, he smashed his lips against hers. She tend to ramble when she got nervous or excited and that was the fastest and most effective way to shut her up. She called him rude for it but never seemed to mind.

Slowly, Harry pulled away, letting his lips brush hers. He loved the way she was gazing at him with hooded eyes and their foreheads against each other. He clasped his hands on either side of her face and whispered slowly, "I'll wait for your answer. Whatever it is, I'll love you anyway "

Y/N’s reply was only a hurried nod as she pulled him in and kissed him again.

They stopped the discussion there and went on with their usual morning routines: sex, shower, sex in the shower, breakfast, then him dropping her off at campus, and them sitting in the car for five minutes straight because she was too nervous to go on her own.

Normal people returned to uni after the summer with a new haircut or a new nose, not a new millionaire boyfriend who just happened to be a famous actor. Y/N kept telling herself she would eventually get used to it, but everyday passed by and she kept wondering when that would be.

"Want me to hold your hand?" Harry asked when he noticed the way she was pinching her thighs, and without waiting for an answer, interlocked his fingers with hers.

When they were little, she used to ask him to hold her hand as they walked to school on the day of an exam. Exams made her anxious, and even though holding his hand didn't solve that problem, it did temporarily put her at ease. Now, everyday felt like exam day...

"Want me to walk you to class too?" he joked, smirking as she gave his shoulder a nudge. "Well, if you don't feel like going to class today, maybe we could just go home and have more sex."

Giggling, she booped his nose. "You're cute. But I think I'm gonna man up and get out of this car."

"That's my girl. Keep me updated?"

"Sure, baby. Have fun at the photoshoot."

Harry kissed the back of Y/N's hand when she opened the door, but he didn't let her go right away.

"Hey! You forgot something!" He pointed to his lips, pouting like a little boy.

"You're like my mum!" she grumbled before kissing him quickly. "Bye, mum!"

"Bye, sweetie! Be good in school!"

Y/N waved her boyfriend goodbye for the last time and walked straight ahead, ignoring all these strangers' eyes on her. It was insane how just a few months ago she was a nobody on this campus. She could have worn her pyjamas to lectures and nobody would've cared. But now she couldn't even leave home without having to make sure her outfit that day wouldn't get her trending on Twitter. To be honest, it was nice how he loved showing her off to the world and was proud of having her as a girlfriend. She really hoped their relationship would be considered normal once she'd become a famous writer. Well, if she became a famous writer.

"Another agent rejected me today!"

"Good morning to you too, Y/N!" Alice giggled as Y/N took a seat in front of her at the library desk. "Did they give you feedback this time?"

"Nope. Just 'wish you the best of luck in the future'. That was all they could come up with and they had the nerve to say no to my book!" Y/N breathed angrily and turned to see Alice raising an eyebrow at her. "Sorry. I got a bit riled up."

"Really? I couldn't tell."

Y/N chuckled as she jokingly flipped her friend off. "Anyway, I know I'm supposed to get used to rejection because JK Rowling also got rejected twelve times before becoming the JK Rowling but—"

"Y/N, Y/N," Alice cut her off and reached out to hold her hand. "Your book is great! I'm sure you'll find an agent who appreciates your talent. If not, you can always ask Harry to hook you up with someone."

"Taking advantage of my boyfriend's name and connections would be the last thing I would want to do, thank you," Y/N said while kneading her temples, making Alice laugh.

"It's only the third time you've been rejected. Relax!"

Relax.

Y/N didn't know how to do that anymore.

It wasn't just her book. It was also Harry, their relationship, and her newfound 'fame'. Maybe people didn't want to work with her because of what they'd heard. Maybe they were afraid that she'd be known as Harry Styles' girlfriend and not for her writing. Or maybe her book just wasn't good enough. Either way, it sucked.

But those things were just minor problems at the moment. Alice must have thought they were driving her crazy, but the truth was, she was so stressed out about her boyfriend's question that even the tiniest problem could trigger her. She wished she could've just said yes. In fact, she had almost said yes. After all, he had a good point. It wouldn't make a big difference because they were practically living together now. Still, there was something so scary about moving in with someone you'd only been dating for three months.

If something happened and you two broke up, you wouldn't have a place to go back, physically and emotionally, which was why she never wanted to rely on him. She needed to make sure that she could still get back up on her own if something went wrong. Y/N just didn't know how to explain that without making it sound like she was sceptical about their relationship. She had never been more sure about anything else. But then again, nobody could predict the future. And seeing how fragile he was after losing his stepfather, she didn't think it'd be a good idea to have this conversation now.

"Hi!"

The high-pitched voice pulled Y/N back to reality. She and Alice both looked up and saw a brunette with the kind of smile that they would put on the university's brochures. Without waiting for Y/N to figure out if they'd met before, the girl extended her hand and said enthusiastically, "my name is Mandy and um...I'm a big fan of Harry...your boyfriend. Nice to meet you!"

"Oh, okay...Hi.” Y/N smiled awkwardly as she shook the girl's hand. Meanwhile, Alice was trying her best not to crack up.

Mandy happily went on, "there's a new club opening tonight and I'm going there with my friends for a girls' night. So if you're interested, you should totally come with us."

"I appreciate that you asked but—"

"We'll be there for sure!"

Y/N's jaw dropped when Alice gave her an unapologetic grin after taking the offer on her behalf. Mandy, however, seemed overjoyed. "Great!" She clasped both hands together. "I'll send you the address on Instagram. My friends will be so happy to meet you."

The girl left as quickly as she'd arrived, but Y/N was still sitting there and staring at Alice with her mouth agape. It took her a moment to speak, "no! I won't be there! Are you insane? This is a trap!"

"Y/N, don't be crazy."

"They want me to come so they can pull some shit and embarrass me!"

"Or..." Alice lifted her shoulders, "they just hope you'll bring your celebrity boyfriend. If he can't make it, they still get to hang out with his girlfriend. It's a win-win situation."

Sucking in a breath, Y/N blew out her cheeks and ran her hands over her face.

"It's been hard, isn't it?" Alice asked.

"So fucking hard!"

"Don't worry, big sis. I'll be your bodyguard tonight."

Y/N rested her head on one hand while Alice was holding her other. It didn't feel as good as when Harry did it, but it'd do for tonight. She hoped so.

Before the drama last year, her life used to revolve around partying, drinking, and writing. Now she spent most of her time on her own or with Harry, and as much as she enjoyed this new lifestyle, she still missed the good old days.

Thanks to Alice's motivational talks, she had gained enough confidence to let herself be excited for tonight. She had put on makeup and a cute outfit and even curled her hair. She was ready to have fun. But all that excitement only lasted until she arrived at the club.

"Is that Harry Styles' girlfriend?" someone said as soon as she walked in.

People were staring at her like she'd shown up in her sleeping gown, but she turned a blind eye to them all and followed her new friends to the bar. It might take more than a couple of drinks for her to relax.

Alice, on the other hand, was really enjoying the atmosphere and bobbing her head to the loud rock song she normally wouldn't listen to.

"What's with the long face? Have some fun, sis!" she told Y/N, who responded with a snort and a side-eyed look. She was just about to say something to justify her being awkward when a guy and a girl walked up to her and Alice and asked if they could have a picture with her. That had never happened before so Y/N could only smile as the guy handed Alice his phone.

"Right, I'm not dating an actor," Alice mumbled, rolling her eyes.

Y/N managed to contain herself until the strangers left and then started bouncing like a little girl. "I'm famous for no reason, Al! I feel like a Kardashian, but in a good way."

"I told you it wouldn't be so bad, didn't I? Come on, let's dance!"

Alice grabbed Y/N by the arm and dragged her to the dance floor. It was only then that Y/N allowed her body to move freely to the music. She loved the quiet life, but she relished the crazy fun times like this when there was no distraction and intrusion. Tonight she would be that main character in a rom-com, just having fun with her friends and not giving a fuck about anything else.

But then, she saw him.

Like a ghost, he disappeared and reappeared every time the light flicked from red to blue. Or maybe it was really a ghost that she'd seen. The thing about ghosts was that they weren't always the spirits of the dead, they could also be memories and people you had lost as you grew up, and sometimes those were the things that haunted you forever.

"Blake..." the name slipped out of her mouth as she watched the man say something to his friends and make his way to the nearest exit.

Her entire body went stiff. The music was muffled as the buzzing in her ears became louder and louder. She'd had only one drink, she couldn't have been so drunk that she started seeing things that didn't exist. That could've been someone who looked like him. Someone with the exact crooked smile, black hair, and pale eyes. She told herself that only to push her way through the crowd and go after the man.

Just like Alice in Wonderland, she knew she shouldn't have followed the white rabbit, but she was too curious to let him go. What if it really was Blake? Then what? What would she do?

Before she could process those thoughts, a person bumped right into her at the door and almost knocked her over.

"Watch where you're going!" she snapped at them, but then her eyes were wide with shock. "Isaac?"

"Smiley!" Isaac exclaimed, looking more uneasy than happy to see her. "What...what are you doing here?"

"Girls' night out." She pointed to Alice and the girls. "What about you?"

"Oh, I'm here...um..with a friend. Are you in a hurry?"

Y/N glanced back to the exit, staring longingly for a moment and then heaved a sigh. "No, I thought I saw someone I knew, but...never mind. What's happening with you?" she changed the subject. "I haven't seen or heard from you since the funeral. Harry is having dinner with Niall tonight, I thought you were with them."

"Well, Niall asked me to come but I've got plans," Isaac said, staring at the drink in his hand.

She found it odd that they hadn't made eye contact for more than a second, but she didn't want to think too much about it right now.

"About the funeral..." he trailed off. "How's H?"

"Where do I even start?"

"It's that bad?"

"Well, he keeps saying he's fine but I don't think he is," she breathed. "His mother is heartbroken and he cannot stay with her because he still has to go to work."

"That's awful..."

"Yeah, he's been worrying too much about Anne that he doesn't give himself time to grieve."

Isaac didn't respond as he threw his head back and gulped the rest of his drink. He seemed nervous and distracted tonight, which was nothing like him. Was there something about this club that got people acting strange?

"So where's your friend?" Y/N changed the subject again to help him loosen up, but if anything, it only made him tenser.

"My friend?" He cleared his throat. "Yeah, about that, I—"

"Y/N?"

Y/N turned around when she heard her name, and in front of her was a girl, brunette and petite. She skipped the introduction and jumped right in for a hug and Y/N's first instinct was to shove her away.

"What the fuck? Who the fuck are you?!"

"My name is Emilia," the girl said abruptly. "Emilia Styles..."

"Is this some kind of joke?" Y/N snorted and squinted her eyes at Isaac, but Emilia didn't give the man a chance to think of a response.

"I thought you said she knew! Were you lying to me?"

"Please let me explain! Emi!"

"What the fuck?!" Y/N caught his wrist before he could run after the girl. "How about you explain to me what just happened!"

"Look, Smiley. I gotta—"

"No!" She gritted her teeth, her grip only tightened. "You're not going anywhere until I have my answer! Did she say her name was Styles?!"

Isaac tossed his head back and took a deep breath while Y/N was patiently waiting for his explanation. He was stuttering again. It'd all he'd been doing tonight and she'd thought it was weird at first, but now it was really getting on her nerves.

"She's Harry's half-sister," he finally said. And Y/N stilled for a second.

"Harry doesn't have a—" Then, it hit her. "Oh, fuck..."

"Yeah..." Isaac gave a nod when her fingers loosened around his wrist and she eventually let him go.

"Does Harry know?"

"No." He shook his head. "I met her in a cafe two months ago."

"Have you met...him?"

The man swallowed and slowly shook his head again. "But he...um...he knows about me and that I'm friends with Harry."

"So let me get this straight." Y/N took a few steps backwards until she was standing against the wall. "You've known this girl for two months and you haven't said anything to us?"

"I couldn't. You two were in Europe and then there was the funeral. I didn't want to break this news to Harry when he'd just lost his stepfather!"

"Then why did you tell Emilia that I knew about her?!"

"I fucked up, okay?!" Isaac buried his face into his palms, his head hung low. Y/N had never seen him like this before. He was supposed to be the one who kept people calm no matter how bad the situation was. He was Isaac. The Isaac she knew never freaked out!

"She was very eager to meet Harry," Isaac uttered as he tugged at his hair and ignored the look of doubt she was giving him. "She asked me to introduce her to you both but—"

"But you knew Harry wouldn't want to meet her, and you didn't want to let her down, so you lied."

That wasn't even a question because it was the answer. And honestly, Y/N didn't know how to feel about this. Disappointed? Maybe. Worried? Yes. Probably scared too. There was no way Harry could take this news better than she had.

"You're telling him tomorrow."

"What?"

"You heard me." She crossed her arms. "You're only making it worse by keeping a secret from him."

"Didn't you just say he was going through a lot?"

"Yes. That's why you can't let him find out the truth by himself, he has to hear it from you."

Isaac opened his mouth to argue, but he came up with nothing because she was right. There was no excuse for him to continue keeping this a secret.

"I will," he said at last and she finally let go of that sigh of relief. "But please don't say anything to him. I'll talk to him first thing in the morning."

"Alright." Y/N bowed her head. So much for a fun night, she told herself.

"Stop checking your phone, Harold!"

"Sorry, I just—"

"Put it away!" Niall said as he reached across the table and turned off Harry's screen. "I didn't take you out to dinner so you could stare at the screen all night. Were you even listening to what I was saying?"

"Yes, you were telling me about your ex, Beth."

"Jess."

"Yeah, her." Harry shrugged and drank down the last of his wine.

"Who were you texting?" Niall gestured at his phone, raising an eyebrow. "Was it Y/N?"

"No, she's out with her friends. I'm waiting for her to text me back."

"Chill out, mum." The singer chortled as he leaned back in his chair. "You remind me of my high school girlfriend who didn't give me space."

"I'm not clingy!"

"Didn't say you were. You said it yourself."

Harry rolled his eyes at his best friend's snarky remark but then went on anyway, "I'm just afraid she's mad at me or something."

"Why? What happened?"

"This might be embarrassing but," he said with a pause, "I asked her to move in with me...right when we were about to have sex."

"Are you serious?"

"Yeah...It's dumb. I know."

"Fuck yeah it's dumb!" Niall slammed his hand on the table and three other people turned to look at him but he didn't care. "Well? What did she say?"

"She said she'd think about it, but I might have scared her a little."

"Or maybe you're just overthinking." Niall calmly adjusted his napkin and poured himself another glass of wine. "Being angry about something so insignificant just doesn't sound like Y/N to me. I think you should ask her how she really feels."

Harry put down his phone at last, his eyebrows furrowed. "Should I?"

"Why not? I know this whole serious relationship thing is new to you but communication is key. I mean, just look at me and Jess."

"You were together for a week and I haven't even met her."

"Exactly! That's why you don't wanna end up like us, Harold."

For almost seven years they'd been friends, that was the first time Niall had given him good relationship advice. So Harry decided to listen to the man and stop by his girlfriend's place after dinner.

He left her a text to let her know he was coming, but she probably didn't bother to check her phone. Why couldn't she be one of those people who couldn't live without their phones? He loved that about her, but her missing his texts and calls constantly could be frustrating.

Harry was out of breath when he climbed five floors to get to his girlfriend's flat. It'd been over a year, and the lift was still broken. How could she do this everyday? If he was her, he would've moved out as soon as he could; but he didn't come tonight to tell her that, of course.

Before Harry could ring the doorbell, his phone buzzed with two new messages.

⌲ Grumpy Little Deer: I'm almost home.

⌲ Grumpy Little Deer: You won't believe who I saw at the club.

He was just about to ask who it was, but then he heard footsteps going up the stairs.

Y/N appeared with a weary smile and immediately went in for a long passionate kiss. She smelled like alcohol mixing with the sweet scent of perfume that he loved, and he almost whined when she pulled away.

"What's that?" she asked, staring at the paper bag in his hand.

"Oh, right." He smacked his forehead, chuckling. "I thought you might be hungry, so I bought you noodles from your favourite Chinese restaurant."

"Aww, yes! I'm really hungry," she said and kissed him on the cheek. "I swear I've gained a lot of weight since we started dating."

"Your perfect boyfriend puts all your exes to shame, doesn't he?" Harry popped his dimples at his own joke, but she said nothing and only smiled in return.

"So, earlier at the club—"

"Wait!" He grabbed her hand. "Before you tell the story, can I say something first? It's kind of important."

"Oh, okay, s-sure." Y/N nodded, looking a bit worried and puzzled as he sucked in a shaky breath.

"I want to..um...apologise for this morning. I think I came off as a bit too pushy when I asked you to move in with me. You're not ready yet, and it's fine if you want to say no. Just know that I would never pressure you into doing anything you're not comfortable with. And if you think I'm being too clingy, you can tell me anytime."

"What are you talking about? You're not clingy." The girl squinted her eyes as she cupped his cheeks. "Baby, you're not. I love being around you."

"Really?" Harry said under his breath, his lips curved into a bashful smile.

"Absolutely!" She scoffed. "So don't you ever say that again or I'll—"

Without letting her finish, he pulled her closer to a full-body contact and buried his face into the crook of her neck, freezing her to the spot. His strong grip had told her everything he didn't want to say, and the story that'd been on her mind since she left the club had gone out of the window.

After a quiet moment, he pulled away and another smile appeared. "Who did you see at the club?" he asked.

Y/N's brain started screaming 'Blake, Blake, Blake' as her lips parted and she began to stutter, but what came out of her mouth wasn't that name.

It was, "your half-sister."

Watching his smile slip slowly, she wished she could just take back those words. She was supposed to tell him she'd seen Blake, or at least someone who looked like Blake, and nearly had a heart attack on the dance floor. But she had chickened out and ended up breaking the promise to Isaac. She had never felt shittier.

"H-How?" was all he said, his trembling fingers were withdrawn from her face.

"I ran into Isaac," she admitted. "He was with this girl...Her name was Emilia. He said she was your half-sister..."

Harry's face twisted before slowly turning blank. Y/N felt her heart pounding in her chest as she started second-guessing what his next move would be. She expected him to say something. Anything. But then he shoved the paper bag in her hand and stormed off, leaving her no choice but to chase him down the stairs.

"Okay, where the fuck is she?!"

"Harry!" Y/N shouted when her boyfriend shoved Isaac aside and charged into his living room. She stood at the door, pale with fright, and the regretful look in her big eyes had told Isaac everything he needed to know.

He clenched his jaw, staring her down in disbelief. "You fucking told him?"

"I—"

"Do not speak to her that way!"

"You need to calm down, mate," Isaac told Harry as Y/N rushed forward to stand between them, pushing them apart.

"Calm down?" Harry laughed bitterly. "You don't get to tell me to calm down, mate."

"Baby, please, don't—"

"And don't fucking raise your voice at my girl. She told me the truth, which you've been keeping from me for two fucking months!"

Isaac stayed quiet, only giving Y/N one last glance before turning away. She knew what that look meant. If she was Isaac, she wouldn't forgive herself either.

"Why...why don't we all sit down and...and talk about this?" she stuttered, one hand holding her boyfriend's shoulder, the other pressing against his chest, but neither of the men paid attention to her now.

"Why did she come to you?"

"She didn't come to me. I met her by accident." Isaac drew in a long breath. "It's a long story, so please calm down and then we'll talk."

As Harry leaned on Y/N for support, Isaac leaned against the door. Once the silence had filled up the room, Isaac was the first to speak.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier...All of this is my fault. But Emilia didn't lie about who she was, H. She's shown me photos of her parents."

"So you haven't met him?" Harry glanced back up to meet his best friend's gaze. "That man."

"No." Isaac rubbed the back of his neck. "But Emilia told him about you and he wanted to see you."

"Bullshit." Harry exhaled a laugh as he looked away, his lips drew back in a snarl. "That fucking asshole could've 'wanted to see me' twenty years ago, but guess what?"

"I know you're mad at him—"

"No, not at all!" Harry chimed in, interrupting Isaac. "You can only be mad at the people you care about. And I don't want to have anything to do with that man or his family."

"Emilia did nothing wrong. If you would at least talk to her—"

"I don't fucking care. Tell this Emilia girl I don't want to see her and I don't want her to bother the people I love."

Isaac tossed his head back and inhaled deeply when Harry stormed out of the room, but Y/N was still standing there, tugging at her earlobe.

"I'm so sorry, I—"

"Please leave," he cut her off, putting his head in his hands.

"No, you don't get it. I didn't tell him on purpose!"

"Y/N." The way he said her name made her shiver. "Just leave."

Y/N clenched her fists as her shoulders slumped. He didn't even look at her when he called her by her name, not Smiley, so she guessed she should go. Enough damage had already been done tonight.

She left his house with her head hung, and he slammed the door right behind her. She deserved that. But Harry didn't. Now he was sitting in his car with his forehead on the steering wheel and didn't even flinch when she got in and shut the door. So she sat there for almost a minute, just pinching her thighs, not knowing how to start.

"I'm so sorry," he spoke, at last, his voice was shaking as he lifted his head to look at her. "I don't want to get angry and raise my voice when you're around. Like...like that night in the hospital."

"But you weren't yelling at me."

"Still, I shouldn't have yelled. Whenever I yell, I lose someone I care about," he whispered, twisting the silver signet ring she'd given him on his birthday. "Do you think I'm a bad person for not wanting to see that girl?"

"Of course not." She took his hand away from the ring and placed it on her thigh. "The only bad person here is your dad. And you shouldn't let his mistake many years ago make you feel like this is your fault."

With a gentle smile, Harry reached out his hand to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. He looked into her eyes, thinking for a bit. "You know, I used to wish he would come back one day. I believed that would fix everything and our family would be happy again. But as I grew up, I realised some people left for a reason. And most of the time, it was the same reason they should never return. I-I just...What if he tries to get back in touch with my mum? I don't want him to ruin everything, Bambi...Not again."

"He won't. We won't let him." She held his neck and stroked his cheek with her thumb. "I'm sure Isaac will respect your decision and ask the girl and her father to stay away. Everything will be fine."

Neither of them knew for sure what could happen next, but hearing it from her put him at ease. Pressing her lips against his, Y/N gave him a reassuring smile. "Want me to hold your hand?"

"Yes, please," he said, making her chuckle as their fingers intertwined.

"You're not coming up?"

"No, thank you.” Harry put on a grin as he watched his Bambi unbuckle her seatbelt and open the door. "I think it's better if I spend some time on my own."

"See? You wouldn't get this option if we lived together," she said and snorted when he raised an eyebrow. "Too soon?"

"Yeah."

"Sorry." Beaming, she folded him in her arms and gave him a chaste kiss. "Goodnight, baby. I'll call you tomorrow."

"Bambi, wait."

Harry quickly rolled down the window as she turned back, putting one hand on the top of his car.

"I forgot to ask you if you had fun with your new friends."

"Oh, yeah..." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, smiling at her feet. "They were nice. And some random people asked for a photo with me!"

"Ooh, you're famous for no reason now, like the Kardashians, but in a good way."

"Exactly!"

The way her nose crinkled when she laughed never failed to make his heart jumpy.

"Goodnight, kid. I love you."

"I love you more," Y/N said before they shared one last kiss. And she stood there, waving goodbye until his car was gone.

It was 2 AM. Y/N felt like her legs were falling apart as she climbed all those stairs up to the fifth floor. After a whole year of filing complaints about the broken lift in this building, she had come to terms with the fact that they would never have it fixed. She could either suffer once in a while, or move in with Harry and never have to suffer again.

That should be added to the pros and cons list of living alone and moving in her boyfriend. She would make that list later, now she couldn't wait to fall into bed and sleep until noon.

Boyfriend: 1

Y/N: 0

Caught up in her random thoughts, Y/N almost didn't notice the empty boxes in the hallway. It seemed like someone had finally moved into the flat in front of hers, but honestly, she didn't care. She'd never talked to her old neighbours anyway, so it wouldn't matter if she didn't say hello to her new one.

The girl was digging through her bag to look for the key when she heard footsteps on the stairs. They stopped right behind her, then a familiar voice that she wished she hadn't recognised froze her to the spot.

"Y/N?"

#my girl series #older!harry #actor!harry #younger!y/n #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles angst #harry styles fluff #harry styles smut

290 notes · View notes

jslittlebirdie · 3 years

Note

Hi, darling!💖 I'm sorry if you've addressed this before, but how did you and J meet? What did you think of each other? How did everything develop? I'm sending you love and hugs!!🥰💜💚

OMG! Erika, darling ❤️ Thank you so so much for sending in this lovely ask!! I'm sending lots of love and hugs right back at you 🤗😘

It took me so long to write this answer, because, well, I got a little carried away 😅 Under a cut, because I don't want to bother anybody with my personal stuff.

I first met J about four years ago - in summer 2016. I had just finished school and had the whole summer off before university started. I watched a lot of movies in the evenings, and that's when I first accidentally came across TDK. I had never been interested in superheroes and stuff like that before because nobody around me liked that kind of thing. But in this particular night, I just thought I'd give it a try - I had nothing to lose.

And omg. What had I missed in all these years?? Because of TDK, I have not only developed my passion for Batman and Joker but for superheroes, comics, and stuff like that in general. I think I've become much more open-minded about these things. And if I hadn't watched the movie that night, I would never have met this community and all these wonderful people ❤️❤️

The first time I saw J, he, well, intimidated and fascinated me at the same time. Especially his "magic trick" and his stories about the origin of his scars left me with my mouth wide open. I know this is silly, but I was still thinking about it a few days later 😅

I don't know exactly what it was about him that captivated me (and didn't let go of me again). Maybe it was his mysterious appearance, his charm and charisma and his looks 👀😅 Maybe it was his devil-may-care attitude that stands in such a strong contrast to my own personality. Or the way he always keeps a cool head even in the most difficult situations, that he can easily adapt to new situations and is never predictable due to his special way of thinking.

OMG, I think I could go on gushing about him like this forever 😅😭💚💜

But at that time I wasn't ready for a relationship yet. I didn't want to admit my feelings. I was a bit confused and overwhelmed - how can you have feelings for such a villain? But I never forgot about him during those four years. And he never forgot about me either. He was always there. A silent observer. I think I have become something of an obsession of his. And he has become mine as well. I thought a lot about him and imagined what his life was like before he got his scars (I read a lot of fanfics about him and even wrote a few about him as well). And that was the moment when I saw him not only as the Joker but also as Jack 💚💜

This year (2020), a lot has changed again. J has been passing by more often and stayed longer and longer. Until he finally more or less moved into my apartment and now uses it as his hideout - and I more than welcomed his presence. We got closer and closer until... The cinema in my city was playing old movies again in response to the pandemic. And when "The Dark Knight-Trilogy" was there as well, I was totally over the moon!! On July 16th I finally got to see J on the big screen. It was just like the first time again! Except that I had now reached a point where I couldn't stop grinning every time he showed up and a certain tingling in my stomach became noticeable. That was the moment when I could no longer deny my feelings for him 💚💜

On top of that, I didn't know until this summer that self-shipping is real thing and has a real name - I had never heard of it before. It was a real enlightenment for me when I found out about it. When I think about it now, I guess I've had quite a few F/Os in my life, romantic as well as platonic and parental ones.

But none of them has stayed with me for as long and as consistently as J. As he would probably say at this point, "Ya are stuck with me, doll. I'm like a cockroach, ya can't get rid of me that easily."

Even though, I still can't quite understand why. I mean, I'm just an ordinary girl who isn't particularly pretty, smart or exciting. I'm more of an ugly duckling in a world of beautiful swans. A plain Jane. Unobtrusive, shy and awkward. Actually the exact opposite of J. But maybe that's exactly what he likes about me. That I am the calming presence for his chaotic being. That I can see the man who is hiding behind the thick layer of greasepaint and that I can attain the last bit of humanity that he always tries to hide. These are all just assumptions and hopes... For J is not a man who openly expresses his feelings and thoughts. But the mere fact that he stays with me and always comes back is proof enough that he must care about me, that I somehow managed to sneak into his heart!

It took us four years to realize the relationship we are in with each other. Sometimes it was complicated. Sometimes it still is today - when I have certain doubts and concerns. But here we are!

And I love my J! I love him so much 💚💜

#Sue talks #about me #self shipping #f/o gush #asks #friends #ajokeformur ray #J and Sue

5 notes · View notes

hovercraft79 · 4 years

Text

School’s Out

Chapters: 1

Word Count: 4, 103

Fandom: The Worst Witch (TV 2017)

Rating: Teen

Warnings: mentions of smoking cravings, alcohol, difficult mother-daughter relationships

Summary: Somehow, Ada Cackle managed to survive her first year back at the Academy in almost twenty years. She wished she could say it had been a success, but she doesn’t like to lie to herself. Her mother didn’t hesitate to mention she hadn’t even managed to make any friends. Feeling adrift, she turns to the mysterious woman residing in Darkwood Cottage – the only person even more tied to Cackle’s than she is.

Notes: This continues the story I began during last year’s challenge. If you haven’t read ‘Hello’, this one might not make as much sense to you.

In my head, this should be a trilogy of trilogies when it’s done, hopefully filling in a lot of Ada and Hecate’s backstory. Above all, it’s the story of two witches who meet, grow, and learn together; deal with crises large and small; and maybe even fall in love.

I’ve kept everything within canon (though I did keep the 13-year age difference between Ada and Hecate, there’s certainly room for Ada to be older than that). If you notice anything that I missed feel free to let me know. This is using the ‘Last Day of School’ prompt.

I started this fic on my last day of school this year, so of course, the title is ‘School’s Out’ by Alice Cooper.

As always, I owe Sparky my thanks for her editing skills – especially after dealing with the monster of ‘An Uncertain Spring.’ I can’t believe she’s still doing this for me, either.

Hecate stood at the edge of the woods, watching another class of graduates fly away for the last time. Bile rose in her throat and she swallowed. Hard. Five years, over and done with. Somehow, they managed to both fly and crawl at the same time. As the girls disappeared from view, Hecate realized they were the last of the girls who would have been students with her. Next term, none who knew her would be left. She told herself she was glad of it, but it rang hollow, even to her. With a curl of her fingers, Hecate transferred back to Darkwood Cottage.

-----

Ada waved as the last girls took to the skies. Summer had finally arrived, bringing an end to her first year back at Cackle’s. Her fingers itched for a cigarette, but her mother had insisted she quit. Thirty-five years old or no, sometimes it was easier to just give in. She wished her jangling nerves would get on with it, though. Feeling too edgy to transfer, Ada trudged back to her mother’s office.

Alma peered at Ada over the top of her glasses. “That’s the last of them, then?”

“The Feverfew twins were the last to depart. I don’t know how two girls can possibly accumulate so many things. It will be a wonder if they manage to make it home with everything.”

“Two of everything,” Alma said, nodding. “They’ve never had to share.”

“Lucky girls.” Ada gave her mother a knowing look. She and Agatha had regularly been forced to share: clothes, toys, books. Why have two of anything when one will do?

“Spoiled, if you ask me.” Alma signed the last form with a flourish and put her pen away. “Is everything ready for the end-of-term staff party? Will we have a full complement?”

“We have a room booked at The Red Cauldron down in the village at seven. I believe they’ve included karaoke as part of the package.” She could only imagine the size of the bar tab that would be needed to get her up on the stage.

“I’ll pray Miss Gullet doesn’t get into her cups again this year. I don’t think I can take another performance of I Touch Myself.” She shuddered at the memory. “I’ve invited Mrs. Drill to join us as well.”

“As far as I know, everyone is planning to attend,” Ada said, trying to change the subject. “I didn’t know whether I should invite Miss Hardbroom. I did.”

Alma paused for a moment before shrugging a shoulder and carrying on with tidying her desk. “I doubt she’ll attend, but it was kind of you to invite her.”

Ada frowned. “Isn’t she usually included? She’s sort of like staff, isn’t she?”

“I’ve never thought so. More like an independent contractor, or a local farmer, I suppose.”

Pouring a cup of tea, Ada watched as her mother focused intently on organizing her desk drawer. Ada recognized the sign that Alma didn’t really want to discuss it. “What does she do all summer? Miss Hardbroom?” She schooled her voice into an artificial casualness. “How does she fill the days?”

“I’m sure I don’t know,” Alma replied, just as casually. “How she spends her days is her business, not mine.”

“Out of sight, out of mind… is that it?” Ada said, allowing her voice to fill with Tone.

“Hardly,” Alma fired back. Ada bristled, but Alma pinned her in place with a pointed finger. “Before you get your broomstick bent out of shape, tell me, daughter, what are Geraldine’s plans for summer? Or Gwen’s? No?” She leaned back in her chair, steepling her fingers in front of her chin. “Go on then, I’ll make it easy for you. Choose any kitchen witch you please and tell me her summer plans.”

A shame-faced Ada opened and closed her mouth several times before throwing her hands up in defeat. “I don’t know.”

“Why not? They’re your coworkers. You all live together in the castle. You should be friendly, if not friends. What on earth do you talk about at meals, then?”

“I don’t know,” Ada repeated. She fought the urge to fidget. How was it possible that her mother could still make her feel like she was eight years old and sitting on the naughty step?

Alma sent a thin stream of magic into her teacup, warming it back up. “Well, maybe you’ll know this, daughter: how do you feel when I ask you about your summer plans? After all, I’m your mother as well as your Headmistress. Certainly, I’ve cause to know your general plans at least, but you’re still cagey about them, nonetheless. So how do you feel?”

Ada gave the question some consideration before she answered. “Like you’re dipping your spoon in my cauldron. It’s not your business.”

“Aye – except sometimes it is. That girl, Hecate, that you’re so worried about, has nothing she can truly call her own save for her time, a few personal possessions, and her privacy. I’ve no care to take any of those things away from her.”

Remembering the hundreds of bottles and jars in Darkwood Cottage, Ada wondered what her mother’s definition of ‘a few’ possessions was. Speaking of the cottage… “Couldn’t you give her Darkwood? Sign it over to her? Then she’d have something of her own, a home, at least. It’s not like the Aca—”

“I can’t.”

“Of course, we can. We don’t even need it. It wouldn’t cost us a thing.”

Alma shook her head. “I can’t. It may not cost the Academy anything, but Hecate? She would lose everything. She can’t leave the grounds.” Ada stared blankly at her mother. “Och, use your head, child. If I give her the cottage, it’s no longer a part of Cackle’s Academy.”

“Oh…” Ada said, deflating. “I didn’t think of that.”

“Neither did we when we tried it.” Alma took her glasses off, letting them dangle from the cord around her neck. “Look, Ada, I know that you don’t trust me, because of… well, because of how I dealt with your sister. You don’t think I’m willing or able to do right by this girl. But Hecate is not Agatha. Her mistakes were born of loneliness, not malice.” She sipped her tea. “I’d also like to think I’ve learned from my own mistakes. But if you need to make me the wicked witch, so be it. I’ve resigned myself to the part.”

“I’m sure you’ve done your best.” Ada shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She wasn’t used to this much introspection from her mother. It didn’t sit well. “I just can’t help but think that she has to be so lonely.”

Smiling sadly, Alma nodded. “I’m sure she is.”

“There must be something we can do…”

“Try making friends with her, Ada. Frankly, it sounds like you could both use one.” With that, Alma put her glasses back on and returned to tidying her drawer. Ada knew the conversation was over.

-----

She was trying, truly she was. Loathe as she was to admit it, Ada knew her mother was right. She didn’t really have any friends here. After her conversation with her mother, Ada had been ashamed to say she couldn’t even name all the kitchen witches with certainty – she never knew if she was speaking to Maria Tapioca or Maisie Tapenade. Trying to ‘make friends,’ Ada was now into her second hour of listening to Mrs. Coriander and Miss Bat gossiping about the latest scandal in the Magic Council. Surely, Ada thought, I deserve a cigarette after this.

Just when Ada thought she couldn’t take any more, Hecate Hardbroom materialized right inside the kitchen door. She took a slight step back when she realized Mrs. Coriander wasn’t alone.

“Forgive my interruption,” she said, placing the back of her hand against her forehead and bowing slightly. “I simply wanted to…” She waved a thin hand and a gallon of milky liquid appeared on the table. “I’ve finished the supplements for the familiars. I expect the litters will be due soon.”

“At the full moon,” Mrs. Coriander said. She carried the jug into the walk-in cooler. “The usual teaspoon mixed with their food?”

“Yes.” Hecate looked uncomfortably at Ada and Miss Bat. “I didn’t expect to run into you, Miss Bat. I would have thought you would be out enjoying your summer break.” No one mentioned that everyone knew Miss Bat spent her summers searching for Mr. Rowan-Webb.

“Soon, dear, soon.”

Ada stepped closer, smiling brightly. “We thought we might enjoy a picnic supper down by the lake this evening. Would you care to join us?”

Hecate blanched. “That’s kind of you to offer, but… I don’t wish to intrude.” Her mouth moved into a tight line that she probably meant to be a smile. “I really shouldn’t leave my work.”

“Ah, well. Perhaps another time.” Ada pushed away from the table. “Speaking of work… I’d best get back to it.” She bid the rest of them good afternoon. Mrs. Coriander made her excuses a moment later.

“How about you, Miss Hardbroom?” Gwen blinked up at Hecate, waiting. At the edge of her vision she could see Hecate’s fingers nervously rubbing against her thumbs. When she didn’t get an answer, she waved a hand and pulled a stool up to the table, gesturing for Hecate to sit. Once Hecate had settled on the stool, Gwen leaned forward. “Do you know what the best thing is about getting old?” she whispered conspiratorially. Hecate shook her head. “You get to give people advice, whether they’ve asked for it or not.” She leaned back and waved her hands in the air. “And you youngsters just have to listen! It’s wonderful!”

Hecate bristled a bit on her stool. “I’m hardly a child, Miss Bat.”

“Certainly not. In fact, you’ve grown into a brilliant witch and a lovely young woman. And I’m going to give you some advice anyway.” She reached out and took Hecate’s hand in her own. “Whatever happens, you have your whole life ahead of you. Perhaps you’ll find a way to release Miss Moon soon. Perhaps not. Either way, it’s a foolish witch that turns down an offer of friendship.”

“I don’t want Miss Cackle’s pity,” Hecate said, pulling her hand away.

Gwen tutted her disagreement. “Pity? What pity? All I saw was another young witch inviting you to join us for dinner. If anything, you should be the one to take pity on Ada.”

“I don’t understand.”

“Look around, dear,” she watched Hecate looking at the kitchen in confusion. “Not here, the Academy. Ada may be a bit older than you, but she’s decades younger than anyone else. Would you really leave Ada to the likes of her mother? Or Miss Inkwell in the library? Or me, for Merlin’s sake?”

“Surely Miss Gullet would make a more appropriate companion.”

Gwen clutched at her chest and gasped. Hecate rolled her eyes at the dramatics. “Hecate Hardbroom! I’ve never known you to be a cruel girl. I wouldn’t believe you capable of such cruelty!”

“W-what?” Hecate stood, eyes wide.

Leaning forward, Gwen motioned for Hecate to lean in as well. “Miss Gullet may be younger,” Gwen whispered, “but we all know she’s bloody awful company. I can’t believe you’d abandon Ada to that.”

Hecate leaned back, irritated and a bit guilty – she didn’t like Geraldine Gullet in the least. Still, to risk opening herself up to another person, even Ada Cackle who’d been nothing but nice…

“Think on it, dear. We witches live a long time; don’t spend all that time alone.” With a pat on Hecate’s knee, Miss Bat ambled out of the kitchen. Hecate stayed on her stool for a long time, thinking.

-----

Astragalus… eyebright… neem… Ada needed to restock those ingredients first and foremost. As much as her mother had gone on about the high standards of Cackle’s potions program, Ada had been shocked at the state of the potions cupboard. Disorganized, untidy, and poorly stocked, it had taken Miss Gullet only a year to create utter chaos. Ada had managed to muddle through her first year with it in this state but feared she would spend all summer sorting it.

An itch of magic let her know someone had entered the lab.

“Ada?” Alma called from the doorway.

“In here,” Ada called back, hastily exiting. She didn’t want her mother to see the state of the storeroom.

“What is this?” Ada’s mother held up an over-sized leather tome. “This arrived in today’s post. I’ve not ordered a new copy of Thornapple’s.”

“Perhaps that would explain why it wasn’t addressed to you,” Ada said sweetly. She took the book from her mother, admiring the tooled leather cover. “It arrived sooner than I expected. Splendid! I feared it would take half the summer to get here.”

“You ordered that? Without checking?” Alma pursed her lips and shook her head. “It’s not in the Academy budget. You’ll have to return it.”

Grinning smugly, Ada held the book close. “Good thing I didn’t use Academy funds then, isn’t it? Be happy, Mother, I’m taking your advice.”

Alma’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “What advice?”

“I’m making friends.” Ada hefted the book in her hands. “Let’s hope I haven’t forgotten how.” While Hecate Hardbroom certainly intrigued Ada, she also recognized how valuable it would be to have someone she could talk to who didn’t work for Cackle’s Academy.

-----

Darkwood Cottage appeared below Ada. She turned her broom to land a respectable distance away. The last time she’d been to the cottage it wasn’t even spring, really, but the gardens had already been in bloom. Now, in early summer, the gardens thrummed with life. Tidy rows of vegetables lined the back of the cottage while flowers and herbs rambled across the front. She could see Hecate working at the side of the cottage. The scent of roses wafted up to meet her before she even touched the ground.

As Ada dismounted her broom, Hecate hastened over, removing her gardening gloves and wiping her hands on her work apron. “Well met, Miss Cackle. How may I help you today?”

“Please, call me Ada,” she said, returning the greeting. She closed her eyes, breathing in the rich scent of warm earth and sun-kissed herbs – and the roses! The floral, slightly spicy smell was even stronger on the ground. “I’d love a tour of your gardens. It’s all so magnificent!”

Hecate blushed and looked down at her worn leather gloves. “If you’d like.” She led Ada around the cottage, pointing out the different microclimates she’d created and discussing the various spells involved. Ada had been impressed with the spell Hecate created to increase the amount of sunshine her plants could receive so deeply in the woods. She also enjoyed watching as the reticent woman grew ever more animated as she talked about her plants.

“I just can’t get over it – combining a basic weather spell with a moving spell! How marvelously clever!” She couldn’t get over the number of varietals Hecate managed to grow, from aloe vera to zedoary. While she examined the delicate leaves of a common wormwood, a sudden thought popped into Ada’s head. “Why don’t we purchase our potions ingredients from you?” It hadn’t occurred to her when Hecate had helped her replace the nettles for the spring Imbolc luncheon, but she’d paid regular bills to Goodcharm’s Apothecary Supplies. A cloud passed across Hecate’s face, blink-and-you-miss-it fast. Luckily, Ada hadn’t blinked. “It makes no sense for us to use Goodcharm’s.”

“Miss Gullet prefers it that way.” Hecate’s voice and face had both been schooled into a careful neutrality.

Ada stood, hands on her hips and frowning. “That makes no sense. The ingredients would be fresher, shipping costs would be eliminated,” she waved a hand over the garden. “Quality is indisputably higher.”

“I believe the issue is me,” Hecate said, coloring again. “Miss Gullet does not care for me.”

“Well that’s something we have in common.” Ada moved into the shade of the cottage. The magically enhanced sunshine blazing down on her black t-shirt and jeans was getting uncomfortable. “I offended her when I declined her offer to mentor me.”

Hecate winced. “Oh dear.” The corner of her mouth twitched upward. “I corrected her about a potions ingredient. She wanted to grate burdock root when the instructions clearly recommended crushing.”

Ada let out a long, low whistle. “You win.” She wiped away a bead of perspiration that trickled down her temple.

Hecate’s easy posture jerked into rigidness. “Forgive me, Miss Cackle, I’ve forgotten my manners completely. Would you care to come in and cool off? It’s a bit warm for tea, but I’ve made a pitcher of strawberry-basil lemonade.”

“I’d love to!” Ada smiled brightly and followed her inside. “And I do believe it was me who showed up unannounced – again – and requested a tour. I should apologize for my own lack of manners – and for throwing off your plans for the day.”

Hecate ushered her into the sitting area, a small space in the living room filled with what Ada recognized as cast-off furniture from the Academy. Ada made herself comfortable while Hecate disappeared into the kitchen. She scanned the room, still marveling at the impressive collection of ingredients. Impossible as it seemed, the room looked to contain even more jars and bottles than it had during her last visit. Perhaps that was due to two extra tables being squeezed in under the windows.

Hecate returned, floating a tray holding a pitcher of pink lemonade, two glasses and a plate of biscuits in front of her. Once they’d settled in with their refreshments, silence fell. It only took a few minutes before it started to feel uncomfortable.

Ada nodded towards the tables. “I see you’re preparing to brew some new potions. May I ask what you’re planning?” She took another sip of her lemonade. Sweet and sour balanced one another perfectly while the basil added an earthy note that was simply delicious. A splash of vodka wouldn’t hurt it, either, she thought. “This is wonderful – it really hits the spot.”

“Thank you,” Hecate said, smiling shyly. Normally, she enjoyed it at the end of her time outside. She turned to look at the tables before answering Ada’s question. “I’m about to start on the inoculations for the kittens. They’ll need to be ready by the time the kittens are six weeks old.”

“I didn’t know you made those.”

“I try to be of service.” Hecate set her biscuit back on the plate. “I do what I can to… lessen the burden of my confinement.”

“You aren’t a burden,” Ada insisted. “In fact, that reminds me of why I came today.” She summoned a wrapped package and placed it on the coffee table in front of Hecate. “I wanted to thank you properly for saving my skin at Imbolc.” Hecate looked at the package as though it would scald her if she touched it.

“I can’t… This really isn’t necessary…” Even as she protested, a slender finger traced the edge of the blue ribbon.

Ada couldn’t help but notice the reverence in Hecate’s touch. She wondered when Hecate had last been given a simple gift. “You can, and it was. Go on then.”

Curiosity finally won out and Hecate picked up the package. If Ada expected her to be the type that meticulously opened gifts, she was wrong. Hecate ripped the paper off with abandon, dropping the scraps to the floor. She didn’t even bother to untie the ribbon, she just sliced it away with a thin stream of magic. Once the box had been revealed, Hecate slowed down, carefully removing the lid and unfolding the tissue paper inside.

Her head snapped up, eyes wide with surprise. “Thornapple’s Advanced Potionry? Miss Cackle… it’s very thoughtful… and – not that I’m not grateful! But… it’s too much.” Despite her words, Hecate’s eyes roamed over the cover with anticipation. Lifting the book reverently out of the box, she breathed in the scent of leather and inked pages. “It is beautiful.”

“Indeed. And it’s yours.” She leaned over and opened the cover of the book, revealing an inscription thanking Hecate for saving the day last spring and for everything else she does for the Academy. “As the girls say, ‘no backsies.’ The book is yours. I thought we didn’t need to be going back and forth with the one copy in the library. Plus, since it belongs to you, you can make whatever notes you like in it.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Hecate whispered. She looked at Ada with shining eyes. “Thank you.”

The silence descended again as Hecate read through the first pages of her new book. This time it sat a bit more comfortably around them.

Mission accomplished, Ada finished her lemonade, wondering where they would go next. She still doubted that Hecate would be inviting her over for tea – or that she’d accept an invitation from Ada. Her eyes kept wandering over the potions stores, finally coming to rest on the tables. Hecate hadn’t started on the kitten potions yet, but a slight metallic tang in the air told Ada that another potion was brewing somewhere. She remembered the lab behind one of the bedroom doors that she’d seen the last time she’d been here. An idea began to form.

“I wonder, Miss Hardbroom, if you’d could use a laboratory assistant to help prepare the potions for the kittens? Many hands make lighter work, as they say.”

Hecate tore her eyes away from the book, slightly alarmed. “That’s kind, but I couldn’t ask Mrs. Cackle to cover the expense, and… I’m not an appropriate mentor for a student.”

“I disagree with you on your second part. I think any student would be lucky to have you as a mentor. As for the first, it’s not an issue. I’m offering up myself. I’d be honored if you’d allow me to assist you this summer.”

Hecate’s eyebrows practically disappeared into her hairline. “B-But… you’re the Potions Mistress! You’re going to be the Headmistress in a few years!”

“True enough. And I am a good potions teacher, as well as a good potioneer in general. Very good. But I’m not so full of myself that I can’t tell when I’m in the presence of a great potioneer. I’m offering a trade, Miss Hardbroom: my labor for the chance to learn from you. Who knows? Having someone else to bounce ideas off might even help you with your own projects.” Ada leaned back on the sofa, willing Hecate to say yes. “What do you say, Miss Hardbroom?”

For her part, Hecate had every intention of saying no, and was about to do so when she remembered what Miss Bat had said. Ada truly did represent a chance for a friendship with someone who wouldn’t disappear in a few years. Plus, not once in a single interaction had Hecate looked into her eyes and seen pity. “I… I… I say you should call me Hecate.” In a single motion, Hecate set the book on the sofa and rose to her feet. “I usually run four cauldrons at once,” she said, moving to the tables.

Ada tried to tamp down her enthusiasm as she scrambled to her feet to follow Hecate. “That’s impressive.”

“It’s necessary to get everything finished on time.” Hecate folded her arms across her chest, her brow furrowed as she tried to work out what she wanted to say. Finally, she nodded, more to herself than to Ada. “I start early in the morning. I don’t care for chatter, and I expect things to be done in a certain way.” Closing her eyes, Hecate took a deep breath before continuing. “I’m not an easy person to be around, Miss Cackle. You may regret your offer.”

“I understand, but regret and I have long been acquainted. I can’t live my life worried about the next time our paths might cross. When shall we begin?”

Hecate studied her a moment, weighing the sincerity of Ada’s offer. “Very well. Give me a few days to finish up with my own project and get things gathered. Monday morning? Just after sunrise?”

Ada swallowed. She’d thought early meant eight o’clock, not sunrise. Nonetheless, she’d asked for the opportunity. She held her hand out, holding it until Hecate grasped it with her own. “Monday morning, then,” she said, shaking Hecate’s hand. “I’ll see you then.”

Hecate stood in her doorway long after Ada had disappeared over the trees. She hoped she hadn’t made a terrible mistake. Again.

#hackle summer trope challenge #Hackle #getting to know you #tww17

8 notes · View notes

cakesexuality · 3 years

Note

Thank you. :) Do you mind me trying to figure out what you have been doing since I last talked with you?

Sure!! Some of this stuff I don't think I've shared at all on Tumblr so maybe it'll be a nice catch-up for everyone

I kinda disappeared from Tumblr in like early-mid 2018 bc I needed to make room on my phone, so I deleted the app and wasn't visiting much on desktop. At that time, I had moved away for college and was living with roommates, but I ended up getting sick (fatigue and malaise) with something immune-related and wasn't able to actually attend any classes so I dropped out bc it took a lot out of me just to change my clothes or make food. In the summer I was somehow able to change up what I was eating and accidentally discovered food is what was making me sick, but I just didn't know exactly what!!

I moved back in with my mom at the end of my lease (August 2018) and have been mostly stuck at home since so quarantine hasn't affected me much lol

In January 2019 I started streaming on Twitch bc I was struggling to finish Spyro Reignited Trilogy and wanted my friends to be able to support me through it. It ended up being a good way to get through my PS4 backlog so I kept doing it!! The first game we started after finishing Spyro was Uncharted 1 off the Nathan Drake Collection. I recently had my first stream since June bc I decided to play The Last of Us Part II off-air and things kept coming up that made me unable to/not want to stream. A week ago, my friend came over and we made tiny food while drinking fizzy beverages in honour of Princess Entrapta (who is autistic and only consumes tiny food and fizzy beverages) from the new She-Ra. My Twitch name is cupcakeing.

I also got really into makeup this year. A cosplay YouTuber called Anya Panda proposed an ARG makeup challenge on Instagram, so I started off with a look inspired by brutalmoose's Televoid! and it ended up getting me into doing makeup inspired by a bunch of different media, like ATLA and Crash Bandicoot. I haven't posted on Instagram in a while and haven't been on the app much in general lately, but over there I'm billiecupcake6.

Yesterday I finally had a phone consultation with an allergist. Her office is going to contact me at some point to go in for an actual allergy test. I've been able to figure out a few things that make me sick, like almonds and cat dander and dog dander and some cold cuts, but I still have a baseline of being kinda tired and we don't even know if these are actual allergies.

I've also been having eye problems, as you may be able to tell from screenshots I post where it shows I have enlarged text!! No clue what's causing it but I've got eye pain, shaky eyes, seeing spots, light sensitivity, temporary blurriness in one eye, eye discharge, and it often helps the pain to take off my glasses?? Which are not a new prescription so it's not like my eyes are struggling to adjust. I've been like this for a while and it comes and goes but my optometrist simply diagnosed me with being in my 20s so I've now fired him. I had a referral to an ophthalmologist but canceled it bc at this point it brings me a lot of anxiety to meet new doctors, so I did a lil online research and found one who I think I'll feel safe with and got my nurse practitioner to refer me to her instead

If you wanna ask about anything in particular feel free!! I'll probably be able to answer it publicly

1 note · View note

themoonandotherslikeit · 5 years

Text

What the Rain Can’t Wash Away- Chapter 8

*FINAL PIECE IN THE LOOK IN HER EYES TRILOGY*

Sixteen years after Lucifer rose, and Dean lost his wife he finds himself with a teenager, a Nephilim, an angel, and his brother living out a Full House rerun with some seriously dark undertones. How will he be able to raise his daughter, fight monsters, and deal with the loss of the love of his life? Sometimes moving on is the hardest part, but with the Winchester’s there’s always something harder around the corner. Isn’t there?

Chapter Eight, You’re the One

Ella

Seeing my mother standing in front of me, living and breathing was keeping me awake. I rolled over in bed to stare at the ceiling. "You're restless," Claire said with a yawn. "Turn out the light, babe." She reached over and ran her finger along the bridge of my nose.

"I can't."

"What's on your mind?"

"Other than the obvious?" I laughed dryly.

"More like, what’s on your mind specifically."

Clementine groaned in her sleep between us, and I reached down and scratched between her ears. She purred happily in response and cuddled closer to me. "More specifically... I have so many things bouncing around inside of my head." I rolled onto my side to look at Claire in the darkness. Her blue eyes seemed to glow in the darkness. "My Mom is back."

"She is."

"It's all I've wanted my whole life. I've wanted to know her."

"Now you get the chance,” she said quietly, pushing my hair behind my ear. "So what's really bothering you?"

"Things are never easy for us, Claire. Never. We don't get to just have happy endings. Micheal is still inside of Dad, and honestly, I don't know anything about Mom. What if she's a nightmare? You remember what it was like when Grandma Mary came back... How disappointed Dad was."

"You're worried she won't live up?"

"Kind of. Or that I won't live up won't live up to what she expected me to be."

"You're the best person I know, Ella. You don't need to worry about that."

"But I do," I said quietly, my voice breaking. "This has been my birthday wish my whole life. To see my Dad happy. To have a Mom, and fuck... what if it doesn't fix everything?"

"She's just a person, El. You can't put that much pressure on her. She probably won't fix everything, but that doesn't mean that you can't have the things you want. Plus, I know she will love you. If not, she's probably missing her soul."

"You're a pretty big softie, for a badass hunter."

"Yeah, yeah. You do that to people." She smiled widely. "It's hard not to be all gooey around Eleanor Winchester."

"Gross don't say my full name. I feel like I'm in trouble."

"Oh, sweetie, you are in trouble." Claire grinned, wrapping her arms around me. She pulled me to her, taking my lips against hers in an urgent kiss. She was warm, and soft. She was present. It was hard to feel like anything could be wrong in the world when I was this close to Claire. Her lips were still minty from brushing her teeth, and I breathed her in. My fingers tangled in her curls as I ran my tongue along her bottom lip.

"Mmmm. Punish me then."

"I wonder if this is what your parents are doing," Claire mumbled against my mouth, causing me to yank away from her.

"What? Gross! I can't believe you. Just said that!"

She busted up into laughter. "What did you expect to happen, Nel? You thought they were just going to hold hands? I'm sure that's why they're locked in that bedroom. What did you think they were doing?"

"Honestly? I don't know... talking. Figuring their shit out. God, you think they just jumped into bed?" I didn't know why the thought was so disturbing to me. Claire was right, it was what I wanted. I wanted my Dad to be happy, but more than anything I wanted him to have the love of his life back. I wanted him to have what I had with Claire. I just hadn't considered sex, not really.

"I don't know," she admitted, opening her arms back. "Don't think too hard about it."

"It's all I'm going to think about now," I complained. "You planted a seed."

"Aw, stop, you little perv." She smiled and wiggled her fingers in a come here way.

I rolled my eyes and cuddled back into her arms, back where I felt safe. "God, I can't believe you brought up my parents having sex."

Claire shrugged. "I don't know. I think it's kind of sweet."

"Maybe, but still really fucking gross."

Dean

I wanted to kiss her. Fuck. I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to take her into my arms like she never left, and memorize her body all over again. I wanted to kiss her, but it wasn't about what I wanted. The playing field wasn't level. It was like we were meeting for the first time all over again. She was Ava. She was a fucking angel, beautiful, perfect, and I was a fuck up. I was some old guy that'd been through his fair share of shit storms in the last decade and a half. She deserved to know it all before she was back back.

"I...I've missed you, Ave. More than I thought I could ever miss another person, but I think you deserve all of the facts before you decide."

"Decide? What is there to decide?"

"If this is what you want. If I...fuck, I'm not the same Dean Winchester you left. I don't even know that guy anymore," I admitted through clenched teeth. "I just don't want you to feel obligated. To me, I mean. You have to see Nel... she's a fucking gift. Best thing I've ever done, Ave. You're gonna love her."

"So, what? You're going to lay out all the cards and then we just decide if we are going to stay married or get a divorce?"

"We've both been legally dead a few times over, Sweetheart, I don't think a divorce will be necessary."

"What do you want, Dean?" She asked me seriously.

"It doesn't matter."

She smiled slightly and rolled her eyes. "You say you're different, but you seem the same to me." She took my hand in hers. "It matters. If I want to stay and you don't want me to then I won't. You're not obligated to me, either."

My eyes met hers. A sea of blue. An endless sky. Looking at her was a fucking summer's day at the lake with Nel. Sammy teaching her to catch fish while I finish of a twelve pack by myself. It was s'mores in the night and stories dancing around the fire. Castiel telling us about the creation of the fucking world. Her eyes were home.

"I'm not obligated to you, Ava, I'm in love with you."

"After all this time?"

"What time?" I reached forward and brushed her cheek. "Time stopped when I lost you."

"It didn't stop, Dean. No time has passed for me," she murmured, her lips barely moving. "But for you... you've had an entire life without me. I want to know all about it."

"Okay." I ran my thumb across her cheekbone. "Fuck I don't even know where to start."

I caught a tear as it escaped her eye. "Start with Nel."

I smiled widely. "That's a pretty damn good place to start." I pressed my forehead to hers. "Come to my room?"

"Dean Winchester, are you trying to seduce me?"

"Actually, no." I smiled a bit. "I just have some things I think you'd like to see."

"Okay," she murmured, putting her hand in mine. I lead her through the hallway and opened my bedroom door.

"Welcome to my humble abode."

"It's..." She ran her fingers along my plain red comforter. "It needs a woman's touch." She turned and smiled at me. "Its very Dean."

"Thank you?" I raised an eyebrow.

She lowered herself onto my bed in a seated position. "What did you want to show me?"

I crouched down in front of the book shelf against the back wall and pulled out the baby books. "I tried my hand at scrapbooking," I explained with a dry laugh. "I sucked, but Cas was weirdly good at it. So... well we got this." I handed her one of the books and sat down next to her.

Ava

I couldn't say the words out loud. It was like I blinked. I blinked into another world. There I was, running my fingers over the front of a scrapbook that Dean Winchester put together. I wondered if the monsters knew that he cut letters out of patterned paper. I opened the book and sucked in my breath. "Oh, Dean."

Photos of me and Sam the day Eleanor was born.

Every page tore at my heart a little more. Hand written scribbles next to photographs of Dean holding a toddler Eleanor with teeth poking through her pink gums. Tiny pigtails and perfect braids. Bows in her hair.

"Is this the bunker?" I asked, looking at a picture of Eleanor sitting on Sam's shoulders with her arms in the air in front of a weird building that was half under ground.

"Yeah," he said quietly, his thigh brushing mine. "It's weird, but it's home."

"How did you find it?"

"It's a weird story, actually." He laughed dryly. "We came across a demon... a Knight of Hell actually and along with her came my Grandfather. Like through a portal." He raised an eyebrow.

"Weird, but not that weird for us. Go on."

He nodded. "Apparently back in the day there was a group of guys called The Men of Letters, kind of like hunters, but instead they read a lot of books. Kind of like Sammy."

"And this was, what? Their headquarters?"

"Basically."

"So you thought you'd move in?"

Dean shrugged. "Seems like as good of a place as any. It's safe, full of lore, in a good school district." He offered a bright smile.

He looked so good.

"What else?" I smiled, peeling my eyes away from him and back to the book. I flipped the pages. Stickers of angel babies, ketchup stains, Eleanor's kindergarten graduation. "What do the pictures not say?"

"She has a girlfriend."

I raised my eyebrows and met his bright eyes. "A... girlfriend?"

"Yeah. Cute little blonde."

"Huh. Is she nice?"

"She's great. Strong. A little edgy. She's a hunter."

"Dean Winchester!" I gasped, hitting his arm with an open palm. "You let her date a hunter? Are you fucking bananas?"

"No? Ow. Ave, she is your daughter. I can't stop her from doing anything. She's stubborn."

"She's a Winchester," I agreed with a sigh. "She would always be stubborn."

We looked at each other. There were years worth of pain behind his eyes. Pain that I wasn't sure I could heal. "Our girl is all grown up."

"She's amazing," he said quietly.

I pressed my lips together, trying to find the words. "Lacey was a demon, and I trusted her. It's all my fault that she got that demon blood, Dean. Has it..."

"Yeah. Yeah it has. Just manifested, actually. She's sort of... psychic, I guess. She can read minds sometimes. She pulled me out when I was stuck in a delusion."

"So she isn't..."

"Dark side?" He shook his head. "The exact opposite. She is the light, Ave. She's all light."

I covered my mouth to let out a sob that had been bubbling up inside of me. She's okay.

"Hey, shh." He pulled me against his chest, and I let it all go. Snot and all. "Ave, what's wrong?"

"She's okay... She's healthy, smart, happy. I'm so happy." I was heartbroken for missing her childhood, but Dean was a good father. He was everything I knew he could be. "I'm so glad she has you."

He kissed my hair gently, like he used to. "I was glad to have her. I think I would've lost it if I didn't have her to take care of."

"I know the feeling," I admitted, looking up at him. "You keep saying you've changed. That you aren't the same man I knew, but... But I know you, Dean. You're the same."

"I've just been through some shit, Ave."

"What shit?"

He let go of me and looked away. I could see the muscles in his back tense under his shirt. He was struggling. I reached forward and touched his shoulder, he flinched in response. "You can tell me," I murmured. I already knew what he did in Hell, what could be worse than that?

"The short version? I started the apocalypse, let Lucifer out of his cage, let him posses Sammy... Sam tossed himself into Hell to protect the world from Lucifer. He came back, with his soul gone. Fucking gone, Ave. He wasn't Sammy anymore. Cas went looney tunes a time and again. There were all of these Leviathan creatures that we had to take out. When we cut off the head, metaphorically, Cas and I got blown to Purgatory."

My head was spinning. "The Purgatory?"

"It was awful. I was there for a year, and Sam was here, playing Dad to Nel. That's probably the most normal her life ever was, but she was still pretty young."

I swallowed hard. "Are you okay?"

"It's been awhile,” he said with a smile that told me, no. He was not okay. "Then... then uh..."

There's more?

I tried to hold it together, and wait for him to gather his thoughts. "I got the Mark of Cain. Which made me this horrible killing machine..." His hands curled into fists as he tired to level his breathing. "I did it to kill Abaddon. The demon that came in with my Granadad?"

I nodded slowly and reached my hand out to him.

He took it willingly, and gave it a squeeze. "And then... then I died." His eyes flickered to mine. I didn't move. I remained emotionless. He died, but he was in front of me.

"What was the catch?"

"The catch... I woke up as a demon." He winced.

"You're not... now right?"

"No. Sammy cured me."

"A cure? For demons?"

"That's what you're stuck on?" He laughed and ran his fingers through his hair. "Yeah, theres a cure for a lot of shit that we didn't know about before."

"Okay, we can come back to that later." I exhaled a shaky breath. "Is that... it?"

"No. I got rid of the Mark of Cain, and it let out darkness... which is Gods sister. Oh shit, Ave. You remember Chuck?"

"The guy who wrote the Supernatural books?"

"Yeah, him. Well... funny story... he's God."

I couldn't control my face anymore. "Like God God. The God?"

"Yup."

"What the actual fuck?"

"Yup."

"He was ridiculous! He was wearing a bathrobe when we met him."

"Sure was."

"You weren't kidding." I shook my head. "Wow, So wait. God has a sister?"

"Yup. She was locked away in my arm making me fucking bananas. So when Rowena, this bad ass witch we know, got the mark off of me it sent the darkness out into the world. It was pretty touch and go for awhile, but turns out that her and Chuck just needed some sibling bonding time."

"Okay?" I raised an eyebrow, feeling like he had to be downplaying all of that.

"She had a thing for me."

"The darkness?" I asked, and he nodded with a shrug. "Of course she did."

"So she gave me something when we got her back with Chuck." I watched his Adam's apple bob in his throat as he swallowed. "She brought my mom back."

I stared at him. I tried to take in everything he was saying. His mom. "Mary?"

"Yeah." He smiled wide. "She's staying at Bobby's cabin right now, for some R and R."

"Bobby! How is he?" I asked, brightly. "I bet he's feeling older than ever after all of this..." My eyes landed on Dean's. His jaw was tight and at the mention of Bobby his eyes were red along the edges. I knew that look. "He... he died?"

"I'm so sorry, Ave. During all the Leviathan shit. It's... it's been a long time."

"But your mom is at his cabin?"

"Oh... well shit, there's more."

"More?" I felt sick to my stomach.

"Not much," he promised, quietly. His forehead was wrinkled. He could see right through my skin. Into the cracks that hide below the surface. I feared that he knew I was about to break. "Lucifer had a child. A Nephilim, is what they call them. A half human half angel."

"The antichrist?"

"That's what I thought, but no. The kid is good. He came out as a full grown teenager." He laughed dryly. "Weird little fucker, but we are trying to raise him. Nel is such a good sister to him. It's pretty incredible."

My eyes flickered to him. Another child. "How old is he?"

"Two."

"Hmm."

"When he was born it ripped a hole in our world. Into another version of earth. One that I never existed in... one where Dad died a long time ago. Before he ever met my Mom. Mom got stuck over there with Jack, the kid, and when we got them out a bunch of others came through with them. An alternate Bobby, and a few others that we lost in our world. It's kind of bonkers, but I just didn't want you to be surprised when you saw him. He's not your Bobby."

I nodded and ran my tongue along my bottom lip. "What else?"

"That's it," he said, sucking in his breath. I could tell he was waiting. Waiting for the other shoe. Waiting for me to run, but I think he forgot, after all of this time, that I am a Winchester. We don't run.

"That's a lot," I admitted slowly, my eyes trailing from his lips, nose, eyes. I locked my eyes to his. "I know what I want, Dean."

"And?"

"You. You fucking idiot. It's always been you." I grabbed his face in my hands. The scruff on his cheek scratched against my palm. "You've aged. You have scars that I don't recognize, but I'll learn them. I've memorized your body before. I've memorized your soul. I will memorize it again." I couldn't get enough of him. There was no more childishness in his face. He was a man, and fuck was he beautiful. "Thank you for staying alive. For waiting for me to find you again, because I believe that I will find always find my way back to you. Through distance, and through time. I'm here. I'm back, and nothing can keep us apart. Not anymore."

—————

Chapter Nine, Never Let Me Go

Get caught up!

Tag list:

@deans-baby-momma

@xjamiedennettx

@linki-locks11

@sonnierae26

8 notes · View notes

andrewmoocow · 4 years

Text

Steven Universe: The Fantastic Mutants Chapter 1: Fantastically Uncanny (originally posted on January 1, 2020)

AN: After going back to the past to explore the history of Thanos, we finally jump back to the future with this latest and long-awaited installment of the Marvel Gems Universe in the all-new Heavy Metal Trilogy! I'm your darling author Lightyearpig, and we're finally back in business baby! Just as a disclaimer, this takes place a few weeks after Change your Mind which unfortunately means no references to the movie or Spinel. Tragic, I know. But without further ado, let the return of the Crystal Gems commence!

"So nice of you to take us in professor." Rose Quartz thanked a young Charles Xavier as they, along with Garnet, Amethyst & Pearl strolled through his mansion home in Westchester County, New York during the year 1963. "I empathize so deeply with your desires for harmony between humans and mutants. Both your kinds are just so intriguing to me." "And I find Gems a peculiar topic as well." Xavier remarked with a smile. "I have to admit, I find myself endearing to your plights against those Diamonds thousands of years ago. Do you believe they could strike again?" he asked. "I don't think so. Ever since the end of the rebellion, Earth has been in relative peace for millenniums." Garnet responded adjusting her shades. "However, they could strike again if any deeper knowledge of the Crystal Gems reach them." "So Xy, got any cool stuff to show us? Or are we just gonna keep walking around and talking about junk?" Amethyst asked casually. "Amethyst, be polite!" Pearl gently scolded the smaller Gem, but Charles laughed warmly. "No need to be so concerned Pearl." the professor stated. "But there is one thing I've been working on for the past few years. Please, follow me." Xavier lead the Gems to his office, where he pressed a button hidden inside a bust of Martin Luther King Jr. and opened a secret elevator hidden behind a bookshelf. "Right this way now girls." he commanded stepping into the elevator and the Gems followed. The lift slowly creeped down the passageway and then finally stopped at a sub-basement inhabited solely by a helmet and computer-like device, both connected to a large electronic brain hovering above them. "This is what I call Cerebro." Xavier explained. "It's still a work in progress, but one day I can use this to search for mutants around the world and take them in as both my students & future heroes." "Mind if you give us a demonstration?" Rose asked. "I never thought you'd ask." Charles proclaimed sitting down at the computer and putting on the helmet. -- Years later, a far older, wheelchair-bound Xavier took off the helmet in a more modern looking Cerebro room while Wolverine and Mister Fantastic stood by him. "You sure this is still the one Logan?" Professor X asked the Canadian mutant. "I'm sure of it Chuck." Logan replied. "Just say the word and we'll all be there in a jiff." "I would like to research this boy sometime." Reed Richards commented gazing at a video image of Steven Universe conjured up by Xavier's machine. With a press of his temple, the professor telepathically gave out his orders. "To me, my X-Men!"

-- "So what was that Universe child like Logan?" the field leader of the X-Men Scott Summers, aka Cyclops asked Wolverine while the mutant team flew out to Beach City on the Blackbird. "Real energetic little squirt who sees the good in a ton of people, even Thanos." Wolverine answered. "Got a bunch of crazy friends too, like this big square lady who's literally just a pair of tiny girlfriends in a trenchcoat, a purple midget with a whip, some bird woman who had the hots for his dead mom when she was alive, etc." "My stars and garters, what an interesting bunch." the beastly researcher Hank McCoy commented. "Heads up gang, we should be landing in Beach City any moment now." their current pilot Angel, aka Warren Worthington III, announced as the jet got closer. "Please keep arms and legs within your seats as we begin touchdown. Okay Wolvie, where to?" "Just be on the lookout for a beach house jammed into the big statue of a giant woman near the beach, that's all." Logan ordered sitting down in his seat and looking out the window. "See, there it is!" he exclaimed pointing at that very beach house in the distance, only it was very different from when he last saw it. Since he last departed Beach City after the battle with Thanos, the house now had a second floor in construction process connecting to a barely-finished crystal dome, larger windows at the front and two flags outside of it. When the X-Men touched down on the beach close to the beach house, he got a better look at the flags to discover that one of them symbolized Earth while the other was colored yellow, blue, white and pink. "Whew, talk about a chic place!" the cryokinetic Bobby Drake, better known as Iceman, whistled while gazing at the house. "You told us he was just some kid with crazy alien powers!" "Bob, there's so much you don't know about these Gems yet." Logan declared placing a hand on his comrade's cold shoulder when the door opened and out of it came Steven himself. "Hi Wolverine! We weren't expecting you to come back after helping us stop Thanos!" the half-Gem boy greeted the savage mutant. "And are those the X-Men?! Awesome!" "We just need to talk squirt!" Logan hollered back from below the front porch. "And also, WHAT THE F-" -- "You're just worried that I can survive that." Wolverine snarled while hand soap slowly dripped out his mouth. "So you were saying that your dead mom was secretly a space warlord who ditched her home planet for Earth because she was sick of the other Diamonds treating her like shit?" "That's basically it, yeah." Amethyst commented. Also since Wolverine first left Beach City, the Crystal Gems had changed in appearance as well. Garnet's visor had turned orange while the top part resembled a star, the bottom part of her torso was split between red & blue and had copper & tin wedding rings on her fingers. Amethyst now had a black top exposing her gemstone, jean shorts with black stars on them and her boots were white. And Pearl had gained a cyan blazer with shoulder-pads over a teal blue top, indigo leggings and pink flats. But it was the newer members of Crystal Gems that changed the most. Peridot's visor was now a larger butterfly shape, she proudly wore her stars on her chest & knees and her socks were now chartreuse yellow boots. Lapis had doffed a skirt entirely in favor of dark-blue sweatpants held up by a gold ribbon, her top had the upper portion of a star on it and she now had golden sandals on. And Bismuth was now clad in a black vest-like garment over a strapless red apron while her boots & pants remained unchanged. "Well, good to know." Cyclops stated standing at attention before Steven. "Greetings young Mr. Universe. I am Scott Summers, also known as X-Men leader Cyclops." Scott introduced himself. "My team and I have arrived at your homestead with an offer to better your skills under the tutelage of our superior Professor Charles Xavier." "Wait, you mean Chuck?!" Amethyst exclaimed. "Aw, it's been ages since we last saw him! How's he been?" she asked. "Since he last met you Crystal Gems, he took us in as his students before becoming paralyzed and confined to a wheelchair." Cyclops's lover & second in command Jean Grey responded. "I'm Jean Grey." she introduced herself as well. "These are the rest of our graduating class; Iceman, Angel and Beast. And I'm sure you're already familiar with Wolverine." "Anyone wanna tell me who this newbie is?" Logan asked standing next to a green one-eyed Gem with white hair and a pink diamond on her chest dressed in light green coattails. "Forgive me sir, my name is Nephrite." the new Gem introduced herself. "Honorary member of the Crystal Gems at your service!" "She was the first corrupted Gem we fought and as such, one of the first we fully healed." Garnet briefed Howlett. "She's here today because we're in the process of building a place for all former Gem monsters to call home, just like her." "So kind of like our headquarters, where we train mutants from across the globe to become the next generation of heroes." Jean stated. "Wait, there's more of you?" Bismuth asked the telepath quizzically. "I suppose you must've been unaware for some reason." the scarlet-locked mutant guessed correctly while using her mutant powers to read the blacksmith's mind. "Oh you bet I was!" Bismuth replied. "Just a simple case of being bubbled and stuck in a lion's mane due to...disagreements, shall we say." "You mean this creature?" Beast asked observing Lion as he sniffed his blue fur. "How can it be possible? Surely the mane of a normal lion cannot contain anything at maximum length!" Steven however answered Dr. McCoy's questions by sticking his hand inside the mane. "My word, I must learn more!" "Hey Steven, just came by today to help with construct-" Connie announced stepping into the beach house expecting the Gems to accept her help. They were present, but were too preoccupied by a group of mutants investigating them including a blue-furred man holding Lion by the sides. "Not even going to ask." "Am I the only one getting some weird deja vu?" Lapis pondered. "Oh you bet! All we need now is a black hole bomb made out of kitchen things!" Peridot replied with a snicker. "Oh hey Connie, I'd like you to meet the X-Men." Steven introduced his swordfighting friend to the merry mutants. "You must be the friend of Steven I've heard Logan talk about." Cyclops commented shaking the girl's hand. "I am Cyclops. Me and my teammates are here today to test Steven and see if he's got what it takes to be a student of Xavier." "Oh cool! Let me guess, you have a flying machine outside on the beach to take us to your HQ?" Connie asked. "That's how the last few superheroes came to see us." "You are very spot-on young lady." Beast declared opening the door for everyone to leave. "Come now, we have much to discuss in Westchester!" The Crystal Gems exited the beach house where the Blackbird awaited them on the sand outside. "Oh my gosh, your ship looks so cool!" Steven cried out in excitement. "Can I sit in the front?" "Surely. Anything Steven." Scott kindly accepted when they boarded the X-Men's jet and allowed the boy to take one of the front seats closest to the pilot's section while the other Crystal Gems, plus Lion, simply stood around. "Well aren't you just a lucky boy?" Amethyst quipped while leaning against Iceman's seat. "Getting to ride shotgun with the big cheese of the X-Men." "Though I'm not sure if we're ready to let Steven leave Beach City to better his powers." Pearl stated with concern when Beast put a hand on her shoulder. "Do not worry my dear, he's in good hands." Hank declared. "Or maybe not." Garnet announced adjusting her shades. "I fear something bad could happen to him while at your mansion." "Yeesh, Captain Ominous here. Am I right?" Angel snarked as the Blackbird finally took off, heading towards Westchester and zooming away from Beach City. Down below, Greg was ready to drive up to the Temple in his van when he saw the Blackbird flying overhead. "I wonder what bizarre adventures Steven is getting into this time?" he muttered as the jet vanished from sight. -- "And that, children, is how you land a fastball special." the metal-skinned Russian mutant Piotr Rasputin, aka Colossus, declared to a classroom full of young mutants in the Xavier Institute of Higher Learning for Gifted Youngsters. The school was established by the genius to better the skills of the young mutants, build them to be the next generation of heroes and inspire his motto of peace between humans & mutants within them. When the X-Men were not fighting the forces of evil, many of them spent time teaching classes, and Colossus, the leader of the Gold team of X-Men, was no different. "Now then, any questions?" Piotr asked his pupils when one of them raised his hand. "Yes, Mr. Collins?" he stated. "Have you noticed that Kitty's head is poking out of the board?" Russell Collins asked, bringing attention to Rasputin's fellow X-Man Kitty Pryde popping her head out with her phasing abilities, inciting giggles from the class. "Bozhe moy!" Colossus exclaimed in surprise. "I didn't see you there Kitty! What brings you here?" "I came because Emma told me to tell you that Cyclops and the others are coming back." Kitty announced. "Uzhe?!" Piotr muttered before turning to his class. "My apologies students, I have other matters to attend to." he apologized to his pupils as he walked out the door. "Be sure to keep studying everyone!" -- In the foyer of the mansion, the X-Men assembled to welcome back their six famous teammates and gemlike guests. On one side were the Blue Team of mutants. Aside from Cyclops, Jean, Hank, Angel, Iceman & Wolverine, they included the weather-wielding Storm, power-stealing Southern belle Rogue, charming card-tosser Gambit, implike teleporting Nightcrawler, fireworks-tossing Jubilee, the disappearing Shadowcat & her pet dragon Lockheed and the tracker Warpath. On the other side was the Gold Team led by Colossus. By his side were the beautiful telepath Emma Frost, Wolverine's clone daughter X-23, Colossus's younger sister Magik, the fire-wielder Firestar, solar-powered Sunspot, pop singer Dazzler, wisecracking shapeshifter Morph, living rocket Cannonball, lava-generating Magma and the other teleporter Blink. Professor Xavier psychically lifted his wheelchair down the stairs and planted himself on the floor to look at the Crystal Gems. "Today my fellow mutants, we welcome some old friends of mine into our school." he announced. "I'd like to thank Logan here for pointing us in their direction." Wolverine simply rolled his eyes before lighting up a cigarette to smoke. "Without Wolverine, our eyes wouldn't have been opened to the potential of young Steven Universe here as both a student of my school and a potential X-Man as well." Xavier finished his speech with a grin. "Now then everyone, introduce yourselves." "Yo Chuck, it's been ages! How ya been?!" Amethyst excitedly greeted the professor. "Why Amethyst, so good to see you again too." Xavier replied tousling the smaller Gem's hair. "It seems that all three of you have changed quite a bit since we last met." he added looking at Garnet and Pearl. "Along with new additions to your ranks as well." "Astounding! Some humans can choose not to use their gravity connectors!" Peridot exclaimed gazing at the mutant's wheelchair. "And they can also choose to not have hair as well!" Xavier gave a warm chuckle and patted Peridot on her three-sided head. "Quite an observant one, isn't she?" "So what's up with the whole no-hair business?" Lapis asked Charles. "It's just old age my dear." the professor stated while gazing at Steven and Connie meeting the rest of the X-Men. "So you're basically Wolverine's clone?" Connie asked X-23. "Yeah, pretty much." Laura replied deadpan. "And I'm also sort of his daughter as well." "Whoa, you have a pet dragon?!" Steven gasped in amazement while Lockheed perched himself on his shoulder. "Well, Lockheed is more of a weird alien dragon, but you get the point." Kitty replied earnestly. "Which reminds me, can I get a look at your lion?" Without Steven even asking him to, Lion walked towards Kitty Pryde and stared at her for a few moments before bowing his head, allowing her to pet him. "Aw, he's a real cutie." she cooed at Lion. "When and where did you get him?" "It was when I was starting to go on missions with the Gems, I found him in a desert one time." Steven explained. "Ah, sometimes I miss the simpler days when I was just an excitable tagalong to them. Just a new monster with no drama related to my dead mom or other Gems in sight." "Kinda reminds me of when I started out as an X-Man." Kitty regaled. "I was just another student of theirs until I happened to save their lives from the Hellfire Club and that's how I became a full member with both Storm & Wolverine having my back." "Wow, you two are surprisingly pretty similar." Connie observed. "You mean like how we were once eager young sidekicks to more experienced heroes who soon grew into our own?" Kitty responded. "Yeah, that's basically it." Connie replied. "So what can all of you do?" "That's just what I needed to hear young lady." Professor X stated. "I want to see how skilled you and Steven are on the battlefield. Come now, to the Danger Room everyone! Reed and company should be down there waiting for us." "What's that?" Steven asked Wolverine. "It's what we call our training room. Able to simulate any situation that requires any of our abilities." Logan explained. "It's been rebuilt God knows how many times, but it's still the same old room through and through." As the Crystal Gems were led by the X-Men, a female student of the Academy watched them depart and her eyes turned yellow as she eyed Lapis in particular. "Ah, she seems easy to replace." she muttered to herself while her skin slowly turned blue. "Let the mission proceed." -- Happy New Year everyone! I sincerely hope 2020 and beyond brings us more fond memories together, and I also hope I don't procrastinate on every chapter like what happened towards the end of both Secret Wars & Gravity Soul. With that said, just who is that mysterious student and what does she want with Lapis Lazuli?! Well if you know your Marvel, then I suppose the yellow eyes and blue skin should give it away. Anyways, be sure to leave a review and I'll see you next time!

2 notes · View notes

littlemonstersau-blog · 5 years

Text

The Feels Awaken, Interlude 2: One Rogue Thought

Written by @jkl-fff

PART I - PART II [Interlude] - PART III - PART IV [Interlude] (you are here) - PART V [FINAL]

——————————————————————————————–

Bill, putting DVD back in case: Well, now you’ve seen ‘em all (until they finish the new ones, of which only Renegade 6 will be stupendous, and that largely thanks to everyone dying—much pathos by meatbag standards, much comedy by mine). So … Whaddya think, Fordsy?

Ford, taking in a deep breath: I think … I think I’m personally going to make a working lasercutlass (with SCIENCE!), drive to wherever the hell George Dufas lives—

Bill, helpfully: That would be Skyjogger Ranch, not too far north of San Francisco. I know, because I know lots of things.

Ford: Alright then, I’m going to drive to Skyjogger Ranch, and then I’M GONNA SHOVE MY HOMEMADE LASERCUTLASS RIGHT UP HIS SCRIPT-SPEWING ASS AND ACTIVATE IT!

Stan, startling awake in easy chair: Wha?! Huh?!

Ford: THAT WAS THE BIGGEST WRECK OF TRAINS THAT WERE LOADED WITH ASS-SHIT THAT I’VE EVER SEEN! [rises to his feet, stamps around, gestures emphatically] AND I’VE BEEN TO SEVERAL DIMENSIONS WITH EXTREMELY SHODDY RAILWAY INFRASTRUCTURES AND BOOMING, FERTILIZER-BASED ECONOMIES! MEANING SEVERAL DIMENSIONS WITH FREQUENT AND NOTABLE WRECKS OF ASS-SHIT-LOADED TRAINS!

Stan, rubbing eyes: Yeah, we picked up on your meanin’ there. [yawns, scratches self] What time’s it, anyway?

Bill, grinning at this development: What’d you think of the acting?

Ford: WOODEN! FLAT! LIFELESS! LIKE THIS FLOOR!

Bill: All George Dufas’s fault. Those were all highly acclaimed, highly trained actors, and highly gifted actors. He insisted as Director they act like they didn’t know how to. Like I said before.

Ford: WHAT?! WHY?! RRRAAARRRGHGHGH!

Stan, yawning: Moses, it’s past midnight already …

Bill, egging it on: Heh. And the depiction of non-human meatbags?

Ford: MOSTLY INFURIATINGLY RACIST CARICATURES OF HUMAN MEATBAG CULTURES—er, “human cultures”, I meant just “human cultures”—AND BLANDLY UNIMAGINATIVE OR INSUFFERABLY ANNOYING (LIKE JERKJERK)!

Stan, heaving himself upright: Hey, Sixer?

Bill: Hehehe! George Dufas’s influence again. And the use of the Force? The lasercutlass duels?

Ford: THE FIRST WAS SO UNDERUTILIZED AS TO BE FUCKING POINTLESS, THE OTHER SO OVERDONE AS TO BE SHITTING BORING! THEY MADE SWORDFIGHTING WITH LASERS BECOME BORING! HOW?! WHY?!

Stan: Sixer?

Bill: Hahaha! Still George Dufas! And the script?

Ford: THE SCRIPT?! WHAT SCRIPT?! THAT WAS USED, BARGAIN-PRICED TOILET PAPER! RRRAAARRRGHGHGH!

Stan: Sixer!

Ford: WHAT?! … Er, sorry. What?

Stan: It’s past midnight. Meanin’ it’s bedtime. You comin’ or what?

Ford: Gah! I couldn’t possibly sleep now! I’m too enraged!

Stan, shrugging: Well, I am. So … keep the nerd-ragin’ at, y’know, an “indoor voice” level of volume. ‘kay? [kisses him goodnight, shuffles out]

Ford, momentarily taken aback: Um … Where was I?

Bill, helpfully: The script. Which was also George Dufas’s fault. Basically, the whole prequel trilogy is a case study of what happens if you give a man who had one or two good ideas in the past— when there was an entire team of more talented people to shoot down his one or two thousand bad ideas and sculpt the few good ones— complete creative control of a project.

Ford, remembering how disgusted he is: No, it’s a case study of what happens if a tornado picks up a barn full of diarrhetic animals— A LITERAL SHITSTORM—hits a warehouse of blank paper, then some fuckwattle decides to gather up the pages and use it as a script! It made exactly 0.0 sense as a story! According to SCIENCE! itself there wasn’t even a measurable amount of sense made in this story! And, believe me, I understand that writing isn’t easy, but they had … How long exactly to work on the scripts?

Bill, promptly: Almost exactly16 years to work on the first one, then almost exactly 3 years for the second one, and another 3 for the third.

Ford, trembling with self-control: S-sssixteen years for one script? And that mmmakes … t-t-twenty-two years total to come up with … with that p-pile of hot, fffffuck-juggling shhhhhhhhhhhit … [loses it, explodes] OH MY VARIOUS ENTITIES OF COSMIC POWER FOR WHOM THE TERM “GODS” COULD REASONABLY BE USED AS A SHORTHAND, EVEN IF IT IS SOMEWHAT MISLEADING!

Stan, from the other room: Indoor voice!

Ford, stomping around: WE COULD COME UP WITH A BETTER PLOTLINE FOR A PREQUEL TRILOGY IN ONE NIGHT THAN THAT MOVING BAG OF NEGATIVE FUCKGUZZLE DID IN TWENTY-FUCKING-TWO FUCKING YEARS! AND Y’KNOW WHAT?! [takes Bill by the shoulders] WE WILL, GODSDAMNIT!

Bill, disbelieving: Really? You wanna do something with me?

Ford: AND IT’LL HAVE COMPELLING CHARACTER ARCS, AND SUBTLY DEEP WORLDBUILDING FOR THE GALAXY, AND THE FORCE’LL BE SHOWN—

Stan, from other room: IF YOU DON’T KEEP IT DOWN, STANFORD PINES, I’LL COME OUT THERE AND SHOW YOU MY FORCE RIGHT UPSIDE YOUR FOOL HEAD!

Bill, excited: Mabel left a bunch of … of arts and crafts stuff upstairs. We can use those for this! I’ll just … just run and get them! Hang on! [scampers up the stairs]

Ford, suddenly alone: … wait a minute … [stops short, looks around deserted room) What the freeze-dried hell am I doing?

Stan, grouching back in: What you’re doin’ is bein’ a pain in my ass—a loud pain in my ass!

Ford, almost panicking: No, I’m … about to write better plots for the prequels? With Cipher? I think?

Stan: And? What’s the problem?

Ford: And I don’t … I can’t trust him! That is the problem!

Stan: You can’t trust him to help write what is essentially gonna be a Cosmos Conflicts fanfic? [rolls eyes] C’mon, Sixer, it’s not like he could write anything worse than what we just watched. You were just goin’ on about that.

Ford, faltering: No, I mean, he’s still planning to takeover! No one can trust him, so what am I—

Stan: Just be the scribe yourself; that way, you maintain creative control of the fanfic and he can’t take it over.

Ford: I mean the planet! Er, the galaxy! Gah, no, the dimen—

Stan, deadpan: Oh, yeah, that’s a real dilemma right there. Can’t have Farth Bill takin’ over that nerdlinger galaxy, or we’ll hafta write a whole ‘nother generation of whiney Skyjoggers masterin’ the Force to confront him.

Ford, irritated: Damn it, Stanly, you know what I’m talking about!

Stan, rubbing eyes: Look, I’m gonna share some Old Wisdom™ I learned as a professional conman with you. And which, in fact, you yourself told me rather recently. [lays hands on brother’s shoulders, looks him in the eyes] You don’t hafta trust someone to work with ‘em, ya dumbass. And don’t hafta trust ‘em to be nice to ‘em, neither, ya dumbass. Or even to like ‘em, ya dumbass. You can do all that, while still not trustin’ ‘em … ya dumbass.

Ford, blinking owlishly: … What? I told you that? But—

Stan, slowly: Listen, I didn’t trust Bill at the start of the summer, but I still talked to him. Still interacted with him and was nice … ish and such. And only a week after? I had him workin’ for me. [gestures dismissively] Yeah, he caused some trouble at the start, but I didn’t lock him up ‘cause of it. I was patient with him, I showed him I’d work with him, and I showed the l’il bastard he can’t beat me at my own game— I always got an eye on him, so he can’t get anything major past me. And now? He’s just like any other employee I’ve ever had (except for Soos) … Slacks off and shoplifts about the same amount, too.

Ford: … And you’re bragging about that?

Stan, smugly: Heh. Yep. Think about it, Sixer. For him, that’s huge progress.

Ford, reluctantly: I guess, but—

Stan: Listen, you don’t hafta trust Bill. Okay? You know already he’s up to something (or so you’re convinced, anyway), so he can’t trick you. You’ll be suspicious of absolutely everything, so he won’t be able to get something past you in the middle of, say, writin’ your stupid, nerd fanfic. Or talkin’ ‘bout an anomaly. Or just havin’ a civil conversation every now and then. Okay? This gettin’ through that metal plate in your skull? I mean, it should be able to since—not to put too fine a point on it—you suggested it to me not too long ago.

Ford: I don’t … need … to trust Cipher … to be nice to him …

Stan: Exactly. And—Moses on a moped!—his name is Bill. [turns, goes to leave, pauses in doorway] And for fffffuck’s sake, keep it down while you two do whatever. Some of us are tryin’ to actually sleep.

Ford, standing lost in thought: … can’t believe it … so simple … really have been a silly, old fool not to see it all along …

Bill, returning: Sorry that took so long. I got buried in an avalanche of Mabel’s spare sweaters while digging this stuff out. [unloads an armload onto the table, pulls up paper and pencil] Where do we start, Fordsy?

Ford, a little overwhelmed: Um … honestly, I’m not sure …

Bill: Hmm … Well, what’re the big problems that gotta be fixed? Let’s start with that. What made you mad in the movie?

Ford, after only a split second of thought: Midi-chlorians firstly. Those go, because the Force is a mystical power-energy thing— damn it all!—and not some sorta bacterial infection!

Bill, making a note: Good. Good. How about that Rule of Two? Speaking as a megalomaniac, I can say it’s stupid to only have one agent working for you. You’d get nothing done!

Ford: Um …

Bill: What? Oh, Yog-Sothoth’s sixth soleus, that was a joke.

Ford, deciding to believe that: R-right. Um … None of that immaculate conception or prophecy crap, either. That’s gone. Came out of nowhere, served no purpose, we don’t need it.

Bill, making a note: What, you don’t like the idea of Space Jesus? How about rewriting the romance so that it doesn’t just … happen, y’know? So that there actually is a romance, and not just two straight characters who bone ‘cause they’re the opposite genders?

Ford, getting excited: Moses, yes! And rewriting Otherkin so he isn’t some whiney kid who just … just does stuff because the plot needs some action! We could do that for all of them! We could make it all as great as it deserves to be!

[hours and hours of excited fanboy collaboration transpire …]

#little monsters au #bipper #stan #ford #stancest #a bit #also a lot of swearing #the feels awaken #writing #fanfiction #also this is the chapter that was left out of the illustration lottery #by pure chance #only one more to go!#submission

11 notes · View notes

askroahmmythril · 5 years

Text

A Look Back at the Past 10 Years

I had wanted to put this in the video description for the 10th Gag Reel vid : https://youtu.be/ovzRypMF_BM However, it told me the description was too long. So I’ll post it here instead and link it from the video info. Basically, these are just some thoughts and memories looking back at my first major video from each of the previous years’ worth of content.

2009 : "Mega Man 1 - Cut Man Perfect Run" Ahh, my first video, back where it all started. Yeah, my vocal energy has changed a lot since then as I got more confident in what I'm doing, kind of found my own groove, that sort of thing. I've had people ask if I'd ever go back and re-do these with my current energy or what have you, but I think it's important to remember the past, it's kind of interesting seeing how I've grown since then, if that makes sense. That and I really would rather not re-do some of these stages again, thanks.

2010 : "Mega Man 9 - Splash Woman Perfect Run - Part 1" Continuing on with the Perfect Runs, by this point, I had acquired the Gamebridge, my first video capture device. It had its issues, sure, but hey, it opened up a lot of possibilities for things I could work on. Also interesting to see, this was a "Part 1," due to the old YouTube video length limitations. When I first started, videos couldn't be longer than 11 minutes. It later upgraded to 15, and now these days, no more limits.

2011 : "Let's Play Secret of Mana - Pt 1 - Who So Pulleth Out This Sword..." Secret of Mana is probably one of my favorite projects I've done on the channel. I have a lot of nostalgia for this game due to playing it with my mum way back in the days of the SNES. It was a project I had intended to do for awhile, but other things kept getting in the way. It led to an inside joke when the people on Pink's old forums made a Touhou-style game where I was the Stage 5 boss. One of my spell cards was called Event Horizon "Delayed Mana."

2012 : "The Situation At Hand, and Also Endless Mega Man 3" Something I always try to do is keep my fans and viewers informed if something has gone pear shaped on my end. I do a lot of info updates on my social media, mostly Twitter these days, Tumblr if I need more room to talk. If however something is going to cause very long delays, I try to upload update videos to fully discuss things. This particular update video was, sadly, due to having to take time away to deal with the aftermath of my mum's elderly aunt passing away.

2013 : "Mega Man Maximum Demo - Bell Man Stage" Okay, so I cheated a little on this one. There was actually a video in 2013 that came earlier than this, but it was a short five minute audio only update in which I discussed the then "secret project" (Eternal Darkness Blind Run) taking longer than expected to finish up. During the downtime, I ended up recording this demo. It was really nicely done, though sadly, I haven't heard much since about progress on the game. It's one that honestly I wish had gotten finished, it seemed quite promising.

2014 : "Where Has the Dragon Been? - The Medical Lowdown" The first vid for this year wasn't even in January, and ow, there was a good reason for it. This was the era of Appendageddon. For those not in the know, late December of 2013, my appendix went boom. So during January, I was under strict orders to take things easy after the surgery. By February, the stitches were out, everything was healing well, and I was finally starting to get back to normal routines, and so I was able to finally tell the tale of my apparently horrifically large mutant appendix that had somehow wrapped itself around other organs. Seriously my doctor couldn't resist telling everyone stories about how unusual it was. It was kinda weird yo and squicked me out a good bit. And then he wanted to show me pictures he apparently took... Thanks no.

2015 : "Let's Play Silent Hill Homecoming - Pt 34 - Hard Mode : the Abridged Version" Generally, I finish my horror LPs during October, November at the latest. Of course, this doesn't count issues of technical difficulties like Silent Hill Shattered Memories or Resident Evil's Advance Mode. Sadly, this delay had nothing to do with technical difficulties. In early November of 2014, when I had been working on the Silent Hill Homecoming LP, my aunt passed away in the hospital, losing her long battle with cancer. This loss hit my family hard, so I had to take a good bit of time off for this one.

2016 : "Let's Play Megaman Battle Network 4 - Pt 76 - Grinding and Gunplay" Hoo boy. The MMBN4 project. This one took a LONG time to finish. Seriously, this project lasted 90 vids, stretching from Part 1 on March 1, 2015, to Part 90 on July 11, 2016. To be fair, there were phases where I simply couldn't work on it due to things like our house's central air conditioning going out during an intense summer heat wave (yeah, wearing headphones in that was not fun) or taking breaks for things like that year's October horror project, but also, a lot of periods of burnout. When I say I want to wait to do MMBN5 until I truly feel like it? This kind of thing is why. I'm not quite ready to throw myself into that long of a project again just yet.

2017 : "Let's Play Spyro 2 : Ripto's Rage - Pt 18 - Regurgitate" Mostly what this reminds me is that I still need to take some time to do more testing with the Elgato card I now have so that I can hopefully do more PS2 and Gamecube era stuff again. I really want to get projects like Spyro 3 and Pikmin 2 going. Still also really hoping Spyro Reignited Trilogy gets a Switch release... As far as channel related stuff for this one, I don't remember too much going on around this point in time, just the average "working on the current project" type thing.

2018 : "Make a Good Mega Man Level 2 Blind Run - Pt 10 - Chomp Man" Another lengthy project, and another where things got delayed through January. This time, it was our internet connection breaking. Good ol' HughesNet, they're just the best. This had been after the lengthy setup of trying to get my room rearranged so I could get Groose (my current computer) up and running, which was experiencing a lot of delays due to the unfortunate fact that my step-uncle was in and out of the hospital. Sadly, in March of 2018, we lost him as well. The last ten years have definitely seen a lot of changes in our household. This project itself would also see further delays due to our internet breaking again to where I couldn't upload videos for awhile for some reason, and one of Groose's cooling fans breaking.

2019 : "Let's Play Cuphead - Pt 14 - The Haunted Mouse (1941)" And so, here we are on my 11th year of work. It's been quite a ride, and one I hope to continue for quite some time to come. I just want to thank all my fans, viewers, and supporters, whether you've been with me since the humble days of 2009, or if you've just joined us here on the channel. Your continued support and enjoyment of my work is truly what keeps me going, and hopefully there will be plenty more fun to be had in the years to come.

16 notes · View notes

dropsiaczek-the-smartest-avenger · 5 years

Text

Christmas in the Avengers Tower

Word count: 1798

Warnings: none

(source: antyradio.pl)

It was Christmas and I woke up early on that day. I knew there were still many preparations for the evening’s Christmas Dinner, that’s why I pulled myself together quickly and headed to the kitchen to do what was needed to be done. Wanda and Vision were already there doing some things and Bruce was sitting at the table drinking coffee.

“Morning,” I greeted them.

“Oh, hey (y/n),” Bruce replied. “We made bets who will show up next. Vision won.”

“What a surprise,” I said ironically. “He’s a super high-tech computer so he probably developed an algorithm based on who wakes up and when.”

“Hey! Don’t talk about me like I wasn’t there! Instead of babbling you could better get to work, there is a lot to do.”

I nodded and got on with polishing the tableware. The morning went on painfully slowly and the omnipresent smell of Christmas dishes made the wait for the feast even more difficult.

“The most annoying thing about Christmas Dinner is that everybody wants to eat but nobody wants to prepare it. And you Bruce, since you’re here, you could at least pretend you’re doing something useful,” Wanda broke the silence.

“You guys are doing great, I’d only disturb.”

“Right,” I murmured and approached Bruce with a handful of plates. “Lay them out on the table and when you’re done come back for plates for soup and cutlery. Oh, and try not to break anything.”

Bruce murmured something under his breath and exited the kitchen. When I was done polishing, I went on to preparing sweet potatoes for the mash. We were working in silence until Peter Parker entered the kitchen.

“Well hello there! Why so silent? Let’s turn on some music to add ourselves the spirit!” He exclaimed happily.

I looked at him amused. “Hi spider-boy! I assume you came here to help?”

“Yes, of course! I’ll turn on the radio.”

“I have no idea what we would do without you,” Vision growled slightly annoyed.

Peter turned on the music and came up to me asking if there was anything for him to do. I ordered him to peel and drill apples for the pie and later prepare the mulled wine. So, the work went on, but this time with Christmas tunes coming out of the speakers. When the Italian song Acapulcoby Ricchi&Poveri started to play, Wanda stopped in her tracks.

“Why would they play a summer hit at this time of year?” she asked.

“Actually, the song is not a summer hit. It says that in Italy, when Christmas come, people go to Acapulco to use some sun,” I explained.

“Oh.”

We finished the work around noon, and everyone headed to their rooms to get ready for the evening. The first thing I did was checking if all presents are ready and prepared as they should be – packed and signed. For Thor I got a plaid flannel shirt and hammer-patterned boxers, for Bruce the Jurassic Park trilogy on Blu-ray and a Rubik’s Cube, for Bucky sleeves with fake tattoos and an iPod, for Peter a backpack and a Death Star Lego set, for Nat super-stylish velvet Ray-Ban sunglasses, for Tony a Gameboy and games, for Captain an electric shaver and Metallica’s Black Album, for Sam new running shoes, for Vision a sonic toothbrush, for Wanda a pillow with Vision’s face and a digital photo frame with some pictures of her and Vision I’ve secretly taken, for Clint a GPS locator, for T’Challa new Hawaiian-patterned swimming trunks and for Rhodey a voucher to spa. I even got a gift for the newest Avengers Tower resident, who was Loki, Thor’s brother. I got him an ugly Christmas sweater and the whole series of The Saxon Stories by Bernard Cornwell. Loki was still and outcast among Avengers, they all still remembered how he tried to take over the world. But even so I didn’t want him to be alienated on a day like this.

After checking the presents I moved on to making myself beautiful for the Dinner. I took a shower, washed my hair and applied some stunning make-up. For the occasion I chose a black skirt, an ugly Christmas sweater, similar to the one I bought for Loki and a Santa Claus hat. When I was all set, I took the gifts and headed to the dining room. Almost everyone was already there except for Thor and his brother. I put all presents under the tree and took a place at the table. Soon came Thor and announced that his brother won’t be joining us for the Christmas Dinner. A sigh of relief could be heard, and the atmosphere relaxed a little. I was wondering if I’m the only one who’s not happy about this. Okay, I knew Loki was evil and tricky, but it’s Christmas! Supposedly even animals speak in a human voice on this one special evening.

“Since everyone is finally here, I’d like to wish you all a Merry Christmas and let’s get down to eating!” Tony announced.

“Merry Christmas!” Everyone replied and the sound of chattering cutlery filled the room. There were so many dishes, all so delicious, and I wanted to try them all, but at some point my stomach was so full that I had to take a break.

“Hey, Clint, would you mind pouring me some mulled wine?”

“Sure thing, (y/n),” Clint replied, smiling as he handed me the mug full hot liquid. “Are you done earing?”

“Yes, for now. I’m sooo full,” I said, patting my belly. “I look as if I was pregnant.”

My words made Clint laugh. “I’ve had enough too, shall we get down to presents?”

“No, that would be rude!” I reproached. “We have to wait until everyone finishes eating.”

I liked Clint, he was one of my favourites at the Avengers Tower. Behind a seemingly inaccessible façade he was an incredibly nice and warm guy, a big child really. My second favourite was Peter Parker a.k.a. Spider-boy and he was the one to speak up next. “Can we already move to the presents?” He asked loudly.

“I’m still eating, would you, please, let me finish?” Thor protested.

“You’re always eating, Thor,” Natasha teased. “I’m also voting for the presents.”

Everybody nodded and got up from their places, leaving almighty Thor, the God of Thunder, alone at the table. Unpacking presents gave everyone a lot of joy. Some of them were funny and some really useful. Among many voices I heard Vision saying quietly why would someone get him a toothbrush. I got many books, a set of beanie and gloves a, a t-shirt saying I <3 NYand earrings. After some time the only present under the tree was the one I prepared for Loki.

“Who on Earth would buy a present for this freak?” Sam asked turning the package around in his hands.

“Me.”

“You’re too good, (y/n).”

“Perhaps,” I agreed.

From that moment the atmosphere tensed a little, but everyone went on to their own business. Natasha and Bruce were kissing in the corner, Tony, Clint, Sam and Rhodey got engaged in a drinking contest, Vision and Wanda left, T’Challa and Cap were playing table football and Peter and Bucky started to put the Death Star together. I moved away from the group and sat in front of the glass wall, looking at the city and drinking tea. It was dark and Christmas lights were perfectly visible. The view calmed me down. The glass wall showed the reflection of Thor approaching me.

“Thank you,” He said sitting beside me.

“For what?” I asked.

“That you don’t see my brother as a monster,” The man explained. “He did many things wrong but he’s trying to be good. I wish everyone could see it.”

“Maybe he’s just lost?” I suggested. “You were brothers and best friends when you were young and then he found out he’s not your real brother, that your father took him away from his home planet. Maybe he’s lost his identity and feels he doesn’t belong anywhere? Maybe he did all these dreadful things because he was trying to find his place in the universe?”

“You know, (y/n), you might be right. But everyone’s aversion won’t help him.”

“So talk to him. He needs to understand that fixing his relations with everyone here will take some time, but if he sticks to his decision it will eventually pay off.”

“Thank you,” Thor said and got up to leave. “And thank you for the boxers, they’re wonderful.”

“It wasn’t me, it was the Santa Claus.”

It got really late and I was the only one left in the dining room. I didn’t even realize when everyone left, I was so drowned in my thoughts. I decided to go to sleep too, but first…I took a glance at the lonely package under the Christmas tree. I knew I had to be the one to make the first move, and to get to my room I had to go past Loki’s anyway, so I decided to give him the gift in person. I took the package and headed in the right direction, vigorously at first but as I was getting close I slowed down my pace, losing my initial confidence. What if, in fact, Loki was so evil? I shook of all negative thoughts. He came to the Avengers Tower on his own accord, he must’ve had good intentions.

When I stood at his door I had to fight another battle with myself. And what if he’s asleep and I’ll wake him up and make him angry?And then: No, I have to try!I knocked on the door slightly and held my breath for a few seconds. There was no response. And just when I was about to leave the door opened slightly.

“What do you want?” I heard Loki’s smooth voice.

I turned around to face the door again. “You didn’t join us for the Christmas Dinner and Santa Claus left something for you too,” I said walking back to the door. Loki opened the door some more and I saw he was dressed in black sweatpants only.

“Some kind-hearted creature cared to get me a present. This can’t be. Where’s the trick?” Loki asked suspiciously.

“There is none, I swear,” I promised in a voice just above a whisper.

“Why do you even care?”

“Because I believe you’re not evil, just lost. I bought you a series of books by my favourite author, let me know if you like them.” With these words I turned to leave but stopped after few steps and turned around. “Oh, and Loki, Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas, (y/n).” Loki whispered and quickly closed the door behind him not to let me see tears forming in his eyes.

@kuroshikine

18 notes · View notes

heyyyharry · 5 years

Text

Chapter 6: Teenagers In Love

(from the My Girl Trilogy: Be My Only)

…in which Harry finds the perfect location for their official date.

Warning: SMUT 😱

AU: actor!Harry, older!Harry, younger!Y/N, (4-year age gap).

Word count: 4.3k

Chapter 5: Her - Harry tries to win Y/N back, but there’s another problem.

Wattpad link

A/N: This chapter is inspired by 17 by Julia Michaels and Teenager In Love by Madison Beer 😄

You make me feel like a teenager in love / Can we stay in this dream like we are 17?

From the passenger seat, Harry watched the giant light orb slowly sink beneath the fiery horizon. His skin was cooled by the wind but his heart was as warm as the color of the sky. Even this beautiful sunset couldn't hold his attention for too long.

He turned right back to Y/N, his lips pressed into a smirk when she stopped humming her favorite song and complained, "quit staring at me, it's creepy," but her nonchalant smile let him know she secretly liked it.

"We're on a date, Bambi. I'm supposed to be staring at you," he said with a hand on her thigh and she instantly smacked it away.

"Don't be handsy while I'm driving," Y/N grumbled.

Harry intended to crack a joke about how extra careful she was, but they were heading toward an intersection so he paused to tell her, "turn left here and keep going straight."

"But this route leads us out of the city."

"Yeah." He calmly nodded despite her confusion. "Didn't I tell you we weren't gonna be in London tonight?"

It took her less than two seconds to figure out what he meant and her eyes grew wider than before. "No. Fucking. Way."

"Yes, baby. We're going home."

The proud look on his face made her chuckle. "I've underestimated you."

"Apology accepted," he said while beaming. "I think it'll be more meaningful if I take you back to where we started. So," he clasped both hands together, "for tonight, I want us to be two normal teenagers going on their normal first date."

"If we're teenagers then how old are we?"

"Seventeen."

"So we're not legal yet?"

"Shit!" He faked a gasp. "I forgot that it's our birthday today! We're eighteen now!"

Y/N cracked up and poked her head out of the window to shout, "TODAY IS OUR BIRTHDAY!" at a random car. The couple was in hysterics when the grumpy driver flipped them off, but they couldn't care less, because there was no one else on this empty highway. Her hair was blowing in the wind, so he reached out and carefully tucked a strand behind her ear. She looked so beautiful right now. And he had never felt more in love.

It was dark when they finally arrived in Holmes Chapel. Having lived in London for too long, Harry was used to the warm glow of streetlights outside his bedroom window, and so he found such darkness strange, yet mesmerizing. The sky was a pure velvety black sprinkled with luminous stars. The moon was full and bright, the most beautiful he had recalled, so maybe it was a sign from the universe welcoming them home. Leaning out of the window, he inhaled the Jasmine-scented air, as the memories of his childhood rushed back like a fast-forwarded film inside his head. When he was a teenager, he used to enjoy driving in the night, he never remembered all the roads in this town, but he wasn't afraid of getting lost because they would always lead him home.

"Are you hungry?" He turned back to her, sounding like a happy little boy as he suggested, "let's go to that famous gastro pub near our school, the one we couldn't afford when we were little, what's its called?"

"Ginger Barrel?"

"Yeah, yeah, that one!" His eyes lit up in excitement. "Is it still there?"

"Yeah." She nodded, flashing him a grin. "I still can't afford it though."

"Tonight you do! I'm your credit card."

Y/N instantly responded with a scoff as she rolled her eyes and pushed his face away. "No, you're not. We'll split the bill."

"I knew you were gonna say that. But you drove me here, so just think of it as me paying for the fuel."

"Fine," she agreed just so he would shut up. "But next time you drive, and I'll buy you dinner."

Just as she finished that sentence, the car lurched forward, stopped in the middle of the street and the motor went off completely. It was ironic how they had just mentioned fueling the vehicle, but one second later it broke down without warning and left them stranded on a back road through the woods.

"Don't worry, it happens a lot," Y/N reassured her startled date as she took a deep breath. "Let's just wait here for a while and it'll work again."

"How long exactly?"

"About...an hour."

"What?!" He gasped. "Bambi, we're in the middle of nowhere!"

"I'm sorry, okay? I don't—" She suddenly paused, her eyes lit up as if she'd just recognized something. She grabbed his shoulder, shaking him slightly. "Hey, do you trust me?"

"Of course, I do," he said, though doubt was clear in his tone.

"Okay, then help me move the car to the side of the road. We're taking a walk."

"Wait, what?"

"Trust me," she reassured him. "I know this town like the back of my hand, I grew up here."

"Ouch!" Harry gripped his chest like he'd just been shot in the heart and her laughter torn down the silence surrounding them. Eventually, he got out of the vehicle and helped her move it to the side of the road. His heart was racing when she took his hand, mostly because he had no idea where she was taking him. His manager, Jeff, would never have allowed him to risk losing his money-making tool — his own life, from walking into the dark woods. However, his heart was speaking for his brain right now, and it told him to follow her wherever she went, so he did, no questions asked.

But Y/N wasn't joking when she said she knew Holmes Chapel like the back of her hand. After only five minutes of walking, they got out of the woods and found themselves in a large meadow. It wasn't the first time he'd been here, because he remembered that lake in which he used to go swimming every summer night. He and Y/N would climb on the giant oak tree and sit on its biggest branch to practice skipping rocks.

"I discovered that shortcut when Celine and I were out here looking for her cat." Y/N tugged at his sleeve, pointing ahead. "Our school is right across those trees. See?"

"Yeah..." He chuckled, their fingers were interlocked as he turned back and looked into her soft eyes. He caressed her cheeks, slowly and tenderly. Her lashes fluttered as she held his gaze and locked her fingers around both of his wrists to keep his hands on her face. Those few quiet seconds were the most relaxing he'd felt in such a long time, as if time had stopped and they were the only ones left on Earth.

"You're so beautiful," he spoke softly, watching her eyes twinkled when she laughed.

"So are you," she said in an undertone and didn't protest when he leaned in, and finally captured her mouth with his own for a slow and chaste kiss, which turned hasty and sensual in a second. He slid his fingers into her hair as her arms snaked around his waist, pulling him in. It was he who withdrew and put a hand on her neck to keep them apart.

"Let's slow down, yeah?" he said, their forehead pressed together. "We've got all night."

She quietly nodded and licked her lip, which made him want to go against his own words and kiss her again. But he managed to fight his own urges to break away from her.

They sat down on the grass by the lake, looking up at the glittering assemblage of stars and allowing their own silence to take over. There was nothing more soothing than the sound of crickets singing in combination with the peaceful rustling of leaves. The soft breezes blew through the trees, brushed against the water's surface and blurred the reflection of the night sky, only for it to go back to complete stillness like an enormous mirror laid on the ground.

In the absence of the rest of the world, Harry and Y/N finally did what they should have done years ago. They talked.

He told her his side of the story which she'd never got to hear, from how he'd come to her place after she'd left, to how her journal entries had helped him see the many things he'd done wrong. He expected her to be angry, but instead, she gave him a smile. "I thought I lost that notebook."

"I was scared you'd hate me if you found out I'd kept it all this time."

"Good thing I already hate you," she replied and laughed along with him. Then she began to talk about herself, about everything, including how she'd discovered her mother's secret, which had helped her mend the relationship with her dad, but also made her give up on her dream of becoming a writer.

"I don't know..." She shrugged while toying with a wildflower at her feet. "My feelings and expectations had caused me so much trouble in the past. I just...don't want to get hurt anymore, so it's better to focus on the present and reality instead of dwelling in the past or the fictional worlds I've created. Without unrealistic expectations, you can never be disappointed, right?"

Harry let his thoughts run for a while before pursing his lips, seemingly disagree. "You are a great writer, Bambi," he blurted. "Everyone needs to read your stories, they're fantastic, even the ones you wrote when you were a little girl. And what's wrong with unrealistic expectations, anyway? For all I know, they're what make the world a less horrible place. Take me for example, I love acting because I get to be someone else, even for just temporary, but it feels nice to pretend you're not you and you're in a different world and have a different personality. Things like those make life much more interesting, don't you agree?"

She said nothing, just staring at him with an ambiguous smile that left him dumbfounded.

"Did I say something wrong?" He asked.

Only now did she shake her head. "No, you're absolutely right." Then she paused for a second. "You sound like my mum, that's all. If she was here, she would say something like that."

"Do you still think about her? I don't see you wearing the necklace I gave you anymore."

"I still do, sometimes, not as often as before, but—Well, I have to let her go at one point, right?" She giggled softly, hugging her knees to her chest and glancing heavenward.

Harry had always thought the sky full of stars in his hometown was the most beautiful work of art, because he grew up dreaming and pondering under that sky. He'd missed it a lot while living in London, where the city lights would drown out even the brightest stars. But now that he was here, engulfed by a luminous galaxy, he realized it wasn't just the night sky in Holmes Chapel that he'd missed; it was also her. And now he didn't have to look at those stars anymore because his entire universe was already right next to him.

"Have you ever gone skinny-dipping?"

Her sudden question caught him off guard, so he stuttered, "uh...no, why?"

Y/N stood up, but before he could ask another question, she pulled her summer dress over her head and tossed it down on the grass. She wasn't wearing a bra so her bare breasts spilled out, leaving him gawking like a fool. He had seen much more, but this sight got his cheeks turning pink. Ignoring the look on his face, Y/N kicked off her shoes and pulled down her panties, letting them fall at her feet as she tip-toed to step out of them. The moonlight made her breasts look smaller, but she was still perfect to him, her naked form had him bewitched. He could clearly see the goosebumps on her arms, the scars on her legs for all those years she'd climbed the tree in their backyard. Her body was like a map of her beautiful childhood memories, which was why he fell in love with it as he'd done with her.

"You coming?"

He blinked rapidly when her voice pulled him back to reality. His eyebrows drew together in concern. "What if someone sees us?"

"No one will, I've done this many times before." Her answer left him in shock. Without waiting for him to follow, she turned and gave him one last look over the shoulder before running toward the lake. He watched her dive in with no splash, like a mermaid under the beautiful moonlight. She was swimming around and dipping her head back in the water to smoothen her sleek hair.

"Come on, Harry, don't be a pussy!" She broke into a fit of laughter.

Harry sighed, rolled his eyes and swiftly stripped himself naked, but he didn't jump right in; he slowly walked into the lake as if to test the water temperature, and Y/N just lost her patient. She swam up to him, grabbed his hand and dragged him underwater. He frantically clawed back to the surface, gasping for air.

"That was mean!"

"Calm down, Styles! Have some fun!" She giggled when he splashed water at her and pulled her to him. Before she could say anything, he shut her up with his lips. His heart was beating so fast that his skin tingled and his stomach was on fire. He thought this might be too much because his cock was firm against her stomach, but Y/N didn't mind, she took the initiative and slipped her tongue between his lips. His arms were tightened around her waist as he swam them over to the edge of the lake, kissing her neck and groaning into her cold skin.

He wasn't in his right mind when he moved his right hand between her thighs and caressed her clit with his thumb. The breathy sound of his name escaped her mouth, her eyes fell shut when he dipped his index finger inside of her. She moaned louder, her face buried in the crook of his neck as she kissed his collarbone. Now she truly felt like a hormonal teenager.

"Fuck...baby..." She gasped and moved his hand away, leaving him frantic. "I want to but...not here."

"Oh...okay." He kissed her again, softly. "But not in a car again please."

"Oh, God. Don't bring that up!"

"Alright, alright, let's get out of here. I know just the place." He laughed and kissed her shoulder when she hid her face into the crook of his neck.

The couple got out of the lake and fumbled their clothes back on. He'd been knuckle-deep inside of her just a minute ago, but now both of them were flustered just from watching each other get dressed. He slipped into his jeans as color burned in his cheeks, thankfully the darkness hid that so well. Walking back to the car, they couldn't keep their hands off each other, one moment their fingers were interlocked, and the next his hands were underneath her dress and they were kissing. He didn't usually do this when he was on a date, but they weren't in London now, they were home. No one was here to spy on them, to judge them, or make them feel uncomfortable. Tonight, it was just them and the moon.

They made out in the front seat for a while until the flashing light of another car tore them apart. She hurriedly climbed to the passenger seat, letting him be the one behind the wheel this time. They both looked like a mess right now, especially Y/N with her hair wet and tangled, her dress riding up, one strap falling past her shoulder. He had to use up all of his self-control to ignore his aching erection and started the engine to get them out of here as fast as he could. That fancy dinner will have to wait, he told himself. As she leaned out of the window and stared at the dark trees sliding past them, he took another turn to enter the highway and kept on driving until their childhood houses came into view.

"Wait, no!" She bounced up in her seat, staring at him with wide eyes. "Why are we here?"

"We're going to my house."

"We're not having sex while your parents are downstairs, Harry!"

The way she reacted got him shaking with laughter. "Relax, kid, they're not home. They're visiting my stepdad's family."

She released a sigh of relief when he pulled over in front of his yard. They got out at the same time. She walked around the car, toward him, her eyes narrowed for she didn't get why he was smiling. He didn't tell her, but the truth was, he found it interesting that she'd never waited for him to open the door for her. He guessed that was just how she was; she preferred doing things by herself.

They walked the steps up to his front door, and Harry was glad he'd brought the spare key just in case they might need to stay the night. Little did he knew, his plan didn't go smoothly as he'd expected. When he pushed the door open, the first thing he saw was his mother in her PJs. Just like the young couple, Anne was in shock. It was only until she saw them holding hands that she cheerfully exclaimed, "you two are finally together!"

Harry chuckled when she rushed toward them and pulled them both into a hug. She didn't even ask why they were home this late at night, all she cared about was them finally being something more than friends. Immediately, Anne pulled away and gripped Y/N's shoulders tightly as she sized her up. "My God, why are you soaked? Was it raining on the way here?"

"It was." Y/N giggled, glancing up at Harry whose face reddened as he scratched the back of his head. "Mum, where's Robin?"

"Oh, he's visiting his family," Anne said, and Harry received a glare from Y/N. The mother still hadn't caught on what was happening so she looked rather excited about seeing her son again, especially when he was with the girl she'd hoped he would end up with.

"You could've told me you were coming! Hurry, go upstairs and change or you'll get sick." Anne didn't wait for a response as she propelled the kids toward the stairs, and they had no choice but to do as she said. Y/N walked in front of Harry, who kept his hands on her hips the entire time, as if she was a toddler and couldn't walk on her own.

His bedroom was at the end of the hallway, right next to Gemma's. The hole in the roof had been fixed, and the room looked as good as the last time he'd seen it before moving to his dorm in London. He had taken most of the stuff with him that day, so now the room only contained a small bed, neatly made, and a small table with two straight-backed chairs. His walls looked empty without those posters that seventeen-year-old him thought were cool. A lot had changed since then.

Y/N made her way to the bed, sat down and signaled him to shut the door. His heart was pounding out of control as he came to sit right by her side. They were kissing again, this time, the kiss was slower, but wet and enthusiastic.

"I slept in this bed once..." She spoke with a brittle voice as his lips pressed against the curve of her jaw. "I was nine, and my parents were out of town..."

"I remember," he said between open-mouthed kisses down her neck. "You made me...sleep...so...far away from you...because you said...boys were gross."

Her chest vibrated with laughter. She cupped his cheeks and lifted his face. "Boys are gross," she repeated, making him laugh.

"Yeah? I guess kissing is gross too? All that saliva and stuff..." He teased before his lips found hers again.

Soon she was lying on her back with him on top. Her dress was on the floor, along with his shirt and jeans. His skin was slick with sweat and she felt so aroused watching the beads roll down the tattoos on his toned chest. Her nipples were hard and begging to be touched, and Harry knew that because his cock was the same. So he sucked on a nipple, causing her back to arch as he gripped her bottom and ground his erection against her glistening folds. She felt so embarrassed that they were doing this with his mother's presence in the house, but lust had taken control over her, and now every single part of her was yearning for him.

He tore his mouth away to look at her, his pupils were huge as he observed her face, stroking her bottom lip with his thumb.

"I love you so much." He breathed. "I wish that I was your first."

"You are," she whispered, and a smile crept up on her face when she saw how dumbfounded he was.

"Tonight, we're each other's first, remember?" She reminded him. Her lips curved into a smile as he muttered "I love you" again and again, before pulling down his boxers in one swift movement. As he reached for his jeans on the floor to get the condoms from his pocket, his cock twitched, it was leaking, and painfully hard, so she couldn't blame him when he nearly fell off the bed trying to open the pack and put the condom on with his trembling hands.

Pushing her thighs apart, he moved between them, then wasted no time to carefully guide himself into her. The fullness and stretch were familiar and strange at the same time. She hadn't had him in a year so it was sore when he entered. He felt even more massive than she remembered. Then he was all the way inside, a heavy groan got stuck in his throats as he pressed his forehead against hers, his mouth hung open and his face twisted.

"God, you're tight," he gasped. "I could just come right now, I'm not joking."

Her laugh jerked as he began to move experimentally, the intense pleasure had them both shudder at the same time. Then he picked up the pace, thrusting a little more rapid. He was so thick and full inside of her that she could feel him all the way in her stomach. She struggled to breathe, yet her hips were bucking to urge him to move faster. And so he did, giving her exactly what she'd asked for.

He slid one hand down to her hip and his head dropped forward as he pounded harder toward orgasm. She could feel the heat spreading all over her body like wildfire, but as her fingers found her clit, he smacked her hand away and replaced it with his own. All she could do was look at him helplessly, her eyelids fluttered but she wanted to watch him come. His mouth was in an 'o' shape as her nails scratched down his back and the overwhelming sensation swept right through them. Y/N bit onto his shoulder to muffle her cries, soon his head fell back, and a growl rumbled in his throat as he chased his release. He flopped down on top of her afterward, her entire body went numb, completely fucked out.

"That was good..." She managed to speak but unable to move a muscle.

"Yeah? That was my first time, I'm a natural."

She playfully hit his shoulder for that joke and both of them dissolved into laughter. Slowly, Harry pulled himself out of her pulsing heat which still fought to keep him inside. He shifted around to make himself comfortable before looking up at her.

"I forgot," he said softly.

"Forgot what?"

"To say I love you during." His answer put a smile on her face. Though her eyes were closed, she could tell he was also smiling at her.

"You don't have to say it every five minutes, H."

"Yeah but..." He pressed a kiss to her flushed cheek. "I love you."

She responded with a giggle and turned her head to look at him again. As she parted her lips to say something, his mother's voice caused them both to flinch. "Hey, you guys want some milk?!"

"No, mum!" He shouted back to her, but there was no answer. The horrified look on his face made Y/N laugh so hard that her stomach was in pain.

"Is she gonna come up here? Because I honestly can't move."

"She might. But don't worry, I already locked the door," he reassured her and laid a kiss on her forehead, pulling her back into his arms.

The sun had come out by the time they made it to London, and Y/N pulled her car to the side of the road to drop him off at work. Their bodies were aching and exhausted from all the love-making and staying up all night just to talk. But that wasn't a big problem now that they were happier than they'd ever been. The memories from last night would be enough to get them through another busy day, until they got to see each other again.

"Will you come over tonight?" She asked as he unbuckled his seatbelt.

"Sure, love." Harry nodded. When he leaned in, however, Y/N instantly put a hand on his chest.

"We can't," she reminded him. They had already risked being seen together, she couldn't let anyone catch them making out in public, especially when things were just looking up. Harry also knew that, still he seemed disappointed. Right before he could leave, however, she held onto his arm.

"Have a nice day," she said with a bashful smile. "I love you."

His expression dulled for a second before his whole face lit up with a massive grin. "Fuck it," he exhaled, grasped her face, and kissed her hard. Y/N’s eyes went round as she pushed him right off, but the man didn't seem to care at all. He told her he loved her before getting out of the car and happily leaping up the steps into the building, while she stayed here, smiling like a fool.

But then that smile was gone. She saw Ruby stepping out of her black Audi and their eyes met for a brief second which felt like a minute. The woman was ice cold as she slammed the door and marched up the steps into the same building.

#harry styles fanfic #my girl series #harry styles smut #harry styles fanfics #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfictions #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles writing #harry styles series #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst

364 notes · View notes

vrenaewrites · 5 years

Text

The Trilogy Tragedies.

We made it through the trenches of Nanowrimo 2018. Or, if you’re a wise human, you watched with popcorn while the rest of us cried and screamed and sweated 50,000 words into a google doc. And for that, I applaud you. Nano is no joke. This was my first year attempting it, and while I did technically succeed (I finished my draft at 50k) I don’t think I’ll be doing it again. I needed it this year, though; I needed to face the beast that is drafting book 3 of a trilogy.

Yes, as of November 19, 2018, the final book in the Thistlewolf trilogy has been drafted.

And while this is a monumental thing for me, and it broke my heart to say “goodbye” to River and Fina (let’s be real, I’ll be editing for the next ten damn years); it just reinforced for me how terrible horrible no good very bad writing sequels can be.

And a sequel to a sequel is a whole other beast entirely.

Let’s talk about the trilogy tragedy: the things I never expected, the things no one talks about, and the things I’m still unsure of when it comes to writing that third book.

1. It’s the sequel slump times a thousand.

Remember when I talked about the sequel slump and how hard it can be to write a sequel because of a myriad of reasons? Self-criticism, outside criticism, lack of planning? Well shoot some meth into that blog post and you’ll understand what writing a trilogy is like. You think the criticism was hard for the first sequel? You think you were hard on yourself when you wrote your second book? Oh you sweet summer child. Double it! Add in the fact that your first effort is exposed to the whole world now! And you’re getting feedback that is, try as you might to avoid it, totally shaping your ending! Totally blowing apart your plans for these characters! YIKES. Oh, and let’s talk about plot holes baby!

2. Corners, corners everywhere.

The problem with already having published CIVIL BLOOD (aka book 1) is that everything I said in that book is law, when it comes to this universe. The Magic I’ve set up, the caveats I’ve laid out, the personalities I’ve given the characters, and the events which took place. And I was fine with that, because book 2 flowed perfectly fine with all those rules I’ve set in place. Book 3? Does NOT. Not even a little bit. I wrote myself into corner after corner re: Magic in this world, different species abilities, the way totems and other charms work, and the way I want characters to interact (which like, after what they did to each other in book 2, makes little sense). So thankfully, I have book 2 to fix these things and make them somewhat cohesive. Problem is? I love book 2 as it is. All the shoe-horning I’ve tried to do has failed. Which means...

3. Book 3 might be literal trash at the moment.

The final events are what I want them to be. But did I lay all the breadcrumbs to lead to these events? I don’t think so. Can I lay them all in book 2? See bullet #2. I tried. Didn’t work. Did I close all the doors and tie up all the loose ends, giving a satisfactory ending to a saga of a story? I think so? But probably not? Which means my nano draft might be completely unusable. I’ll go back to it in January and take a look. But that’s the feeling I get.

4. Writing the end of your story is fucking SAD.

Even if your story ends happily. (Not saying this one does or doesn’t.) I never experienced this before. Thistlewolf is the only thing I’ve worked on in my adult life. Civil Blood was the only book I’ve written to completion, and while it had an ending, it was meant to be open so it could lead to book 2. But book 3 is it. Book 3 is the end of River and Fina and Bernardo and Sparrow and Aradia...and wow was it hard to type the end! Even to a shitty first draft! Knowing I’ll be with them for a while yet to get their last 2 books out...I still ended their story. No one prepared me for how much that would hurt! I cried! And what’s funny is, they’re still not done! I had a dream for a novella that takes place a year after book 3! Which wasn’t part of the plan at all. But when you’ve been “friends” with these people for most of your life, and then you tell them goodbye, it’s hard to let them go. They don’t want to let go either.

Wow I sound insane. I swear I’m mostly mentally sound. Well, I’m medicated anyways. But these are my fresh, unfiltered thoughts on what it was like to write my first trilogy.

1 note · View note

alanakusumas · 6 years

Text

The Bittersweet Epilogue (Sweet Treats Pt.3)

Fandom: Endless Summer Pairing: Michelle x Quinn, Jake x F!MC Word Count: 2119 Summary: Since the intense end of their La Huerta trip, the gang is still as close as they were two years ago. Their trauma is a weird thing to bond over, but the original Girl Talk™️ group cope with their losses through personal achievements, falling in love, and welcoming their fellow honorary traumatized member.

Author’s Note: Thanks for constantly pushing me to finish this series. It’s been a wild year, and I can’t believe Endless Summer is ending already! I’m so attached to this trilogy that started off as a prompt request, and I managed to birth a new part for each book. I can’t believe we have to bid our farewells to these characters already, but when I think about it, it’s been a solid year and a half. Let’s hope they make appearances in other books!

Previously on Sweet Treats, Now Gimme the Deets... Part 1 // Part 2

The soft rumble of car wheels gliding across flat pavement flowed in one ear and out the other. Driving down empty freeways never failed to soothe her. There’s such an exhilarating feeling that exerts out of her soul when she flies down the road, watching the city and bridges around her zip past her vision faster than she can make sense of it. A sigh escaped her lips as she lost herself in a scenery of purple sunsets and deep green forestry. There could be so many things wrong with the world, but in this moment it seemed like it was perfect. The world was perfect, her life was perfect. Her life was finally perfect for once.

How could she have gotten so lucky, to win an all inclusive trip to La Huerta? Certainly she went through a hellstorm, but without that adventure she never would have met friends for a lifetime, rediscover what she finds important, and finally understand what it’s like to fall head over heels in love for someone.

Speaking of that someone, she snapped out of her trance and glanced down at her hands intertwined with theirs. She gave it a gentle squeeze. “I love you,” She mumbled under her breath just loud enough for them to hear.

“I love you too, Meech.” Quinn raised their hands and pressed hers into a soft kiss. “What made you think of that?”

“I’m going down a path of nostalgia again. So much has happened in the past two years, I’m just really thankful to have you.” Embarrassed, she rolled her eyes. “Not to be super cheesy or anything, but I wouldn’t wish for it to be any other way.”

There used to be a time where Michelle would kill to be in Sean’s arms again, but even though their love for one another would never disperse, the time they spent together seemed to have brought them nowhere. There was no growth - just routine, and although things didn’t end the way either of them wanted it to, upon reflection she was happy it happened.

Quinn’s eyes glistened with adoration. “Me too.” She peered ahead of the road, eyes shifting from the speed limit signs to the streets that were open for exit. “How much longer until we reach the airport?”

“We’re almost there, give or take fifteen minutes. I can see the terminal signs coming up right about now.” Quinn nods in response and let out a sigh.

This car ride has been awfully tense; Michelle thinks it’s because she and her girlfriend had a mutual understanding that this day was going to be rough, if anything. The drive to the airport was the only break they had today to drift off into their own worlds before they had to face the bittersweet reality that was their bi-annual reunion.

It was MC’s wish - that they’d always remember and cherish one another after she merged back with Vaanu – and there was no way they could break that promise. She sacrificed her life to let them fulfill theirs; Michelle has been ever so grateful for that. She recalled the time she told MC her aspirations of taking medical residency in New York.

After she returned to Hartfeld, she worked twice as hard as before to ensure that MC’s sacrifice was worth something to her. Since moving to New York after her acceptance into neurosurgery residency, Michelle has had the thrill of diagnosing patients, and in return she got their gratitude. That was more than enough for her. Finally confessing her crush on Quinn last year and moving in with her was just the cherry on top.

It wasn’t a reunion unless everyone was there – and that’s where Michelle and Quinn were heading to pick Jake up. It was their turn to host the reunion - and as MC’s maid of honor, Michelle only felt it was right to greet him there. “Not gonna lie, I’m excited but also nervous to see Jake again,” she confessed as they pulled up to the pick-up area, “Do you think it’ll be a l’il awkward like the last few times?”

“I doubt it; he’s making progress each time we see him. And,” Quinn added, “Judging by what Rebecca shares on her Snapchat, she seems to be spending a lot of time with him to keep him from going into a lonely, soul-sucking deep end. Remember that video of him tripping over a tree branch when they went hiking last weekend?” Michelle tried to fake a chuckle, yet she couldn’t help but let the nerves get to her. She had one hand gripped to the wheel, and the other still clutching onto Quinn’s tightly when tears began to well up in her eyes.

“I don’t know how he does it, I miss her so much.” She felt Quinn squeeze her hand.

“Me too,” Quinn leaned in so Michelle could rest her head on her girlfriend’s shoulder; she felt her trace small circles on her back. It was comforting to finally let someone in her life besides Sean; she felt peace for the first time, in a long -

A sudden jerk of the back door handle jolted them out of their somber nuzzling, becoming fully aware of their pilot friend welcoming himself into Michelle’s car. He tossed his duffel bag on one end of the car before plopping himself on the other end.

“Alrighty gal pals, as much as I like seeing people being affectionate in public, let’s try to keep this car ride PG, shall we?”

Michelle let out a loud groan, contrary to her girlfriend’s lighthearted giggle. “Welcome to New York, I guess.”

-- -- --

The ride back to the city wasn’t as awks as Michelle assumed it would be. Right away Quinn asked Jake what he’s been up to, and the conversation picked up from there.

“I don’t know, I’m still in between jobs, I guess.” He began, “A part of me wants to get into personal training; stay on the ground for a bit. But Reb insists that I try to do some community college – which is stupid, I hate the idea of going back to school. But, I kinda want to do it, for her sake.” He glanced down as he let out a hearty chuckle. “I’m also considering joining the police academy –“

“Oh my god, yes.” The words stumbled out of Michelle’s mouth before she could even catch herself. “Sorry,” She blushed, “I just think that would make great poetic justice. Plus, you have the right attitude and physique for it.”

The left corner of Jake’s mouth lifts up into a smirk. “Physique, eh?”

“Shut your trap.”

“Gotta say, Meech, awfully bold of you to be checking Jake out while I’m right here.”

“Oh, now you guys are teaming up on me? That’s a first!”

-- -- --

“Say, you girls think anyone’s pregnant this time around?”

“If anything, my money’s on Grace and Aleister!”

“Nuh uh. No way in hell am I letting Grace get pregnant this early into her career.”

-- -- --

“Meech, do you always have your hair in a ponytail nowadays?”

“Yeah, why not? I need to keep it up as a doctor. Plus, I look good regardless.”

Jake scoffed. “Cocky.”

“Cock.”

“Language, guys.”

“Babe, first of all, you’re twenty-three and –”

“Second of all, who cares? There are no kids in the car.”

“That’s what you think.”

Michelle’s eyes bulged out of their sockets before she screamed. “Whoa, what the fuck! Don’t make jokes like that!”

“I can’t even get pregnant. We both have vaginas, Michelle.”

“Fuck you, sperm donors exist.”

“Holy shit, Quinn, this ain’t even my relationship or kid, and that stressed me out for a sec.”

“Oh my god, fine. Cuss to your heart’s desire.”

-- -- --

Serene silence took over the vehicle as Michelle pulled into the parking garage of her apartment and turned her car off. Finally relieved to have completed the road trip, she inhaled, and then exhaled through her glossy lips while leaning back on her driver’s seat.

To her right, was her beautiful girlfriend who drifted off to sleep while leaning against her seat-belt; she could tell from the faint whistle coming from her nose.

And behind her – she glanced up at her driver’s mirror – was one of her best friends’ husband, fiddling with the one dog tag he had left on his chain, since he gifted the other to MC before she transcended away. Catching her looking, he stares back into her reflection with sincerity. “I miss her,” He muttered, bold and firm.

She sighed. “Me too.”

Groggily, Quinn stirred awake, “Yeah,” She whispered.

Besides maintaining the dedication of their friendship, the only other reason the entire gang meets up twice a year was a tribute to MC. The three of them hope that she’s somewhere out in the universe, knowing that they’re still thinking of her.

-- -- --

“Excuse me, waiter! One more round of shots please! One more round on me, guys.”

“For Christ’s sake, Raj. We aren’t college fools anymore. I can’t drink this much.”

“I’ll happily take your shot for you, Big Al.”

Roaring laughter and chitchat filled the leather booth that Quinn rented out at their favourite local bar. Michelle was elated to see them in New York with her. Just like how Quinn constantly made her feel, she realized that it wasn’t the city that made a place home.

…Okay, maybe the city had a bit to do with that. But at the end of the day, it’s the people who surround her that keep her at peace. And right now, that meant her family. Her La Huerta family.

“Helllooooooo, Meech? Meech!” She blinked once, twice, snapping out of her trance to see Craig snapping in front of her face, hair still as spikey as it was in the college years.

“What?”

“Anything new happen in the past six months?” His eyes glistened with anticipation every time he saw her. It was nice to know that he’s still got her back after all these years, despite the cheating allegations the sorority had against her.

“Nope,” She said disappointingly, “Just working and studying. The occasional date with Quinn.”

Her girlfriend shook her head in dismay, ready to counter that statement. “It’s not just any occasional date. She took me to the planetarium a few weekends ago! We watched the evolution of the Milky Way; it was gorgeous!”

“Damn,” Sean beamed at the two, and Michelle beamed back in appreciation. “Name a better date in your early twenties, I’ll wait.” Michelle shook her head and bit her lip to hold a laugh in, getting secondhand embarrassment from the outdated joke her ex just made.

From the corner of her eye, she noticed a server approach the booth with a platter of chocolate-coated strawberries. “Enjoy,” She said bleakly.

“Oh, we didn’t order these.”

“These are complementary from the chef.”

Michelle raised an eyebrow at the server. “Why?”

“I don’t know. Y’all are locals, right? Maybe he saw how happy you and your partner are with your friends right now, and wanted to make the night even better.”

“Well, if Michelle won’t eat them, I will,” Zahra began to lean over the table and pluck a strawberry off the platter, and everybody else began to dig in following her.

Michelle side-eyed Quinn - whose lips began to lift into a grin, and then glanced over at Jake – who is very clearly holding his breath in shock. Chocolate coated strawberries? There’s no way this was just a coincidence. Their eyes began to well up with tears again, reminiscing the first time MC, Quinn, and Michelle shared their first moment of sisterhood.

What a bittersweet feeling it is, to believe that MC’s still here with them.

Even though it was as little silly, and she might not even hear anything, Michelle thought it was worth the shot to talk to her. She hated to admit it, but she does that every so often. She liked to believe that MC can hear her, and understood her.

Hey, MC.

If you can hear our thoughts, we miss you so much. Thank you so much for letting us all pursue our dreams. I can never thank you enough. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to fall in love with Quinn; we hope you’re okay.

She turned to see Jake, still gripping onto his dog tag, deep in thought.

Jake really misses you. He’s constantly twiddling with his dog tag, which means that he’s thinking of the other half. His other half. He’s really happy with his sister right now, so you don’t have to worry; your husband’s in good hands. You’ve really changed him, I don’t think he ever wants to fly a plane again without a partner-in-crime.

The most important thing, is that he loves you. He knows you’re his forever soulmate, no matter where you are, or what you are.

She looked over at her gorgeous girlfriend, biting into a strawberry with the brightest grin on her face. And someday, I hope I’ll feel the way he does for you, with Quinn.

Oh, by the way, those strawberries the ‘chef’ sent were amaaaazing.

-- -- --

“Oh!” Grace grabbed onto her boyfriend’s arm. “Aleister and I have some news to share with you all!”

Jake and Michelle immediately exchange an alarmed look with one another. Please don’t be pregnant, please don’t be pregnant.

“Grace and I have been talking about it, and we finally decided that…we’re going to move in together.”

Oh, Jesus Christ, thank the fucking Lord.

#playchoices #endless summer #jake mckenzie #jakexmc #jake x mc #endless summer fanfic #my writing #es #michellexquinn #michelle x quinn #quinn kelly #michelle nguyen

81 notes · View notes