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rafeandonlyrafe · 2 months

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the pogues and the princess

words: 1.8k

warnings: drinking, partying, throwing up, protective!rafe, threats of violence, established relationship

“oh come on, don’t be so grumpy.” you poke at rafes cheek, his face downturned in a scowl.

“you know i don’t like you at these type of parties.” rafe sighs, slapping your hand away from his face as he concentrates on the road in front of him, wishing for once that he doesn’t get to his destination faster, wanting to keep you there with him.

“babe, i’d hardly call it a party. its just gonna be me, sarah and kiara… and a couple other people.” “yeah, the fucking pogues.” rafe grunts. “you know how i feel about you hanging out with them.” “oh please, i don’t even talk to jj or john b. i just miss my girls.” you pout. you got super close with sarah when you started dating rafe, which naturally led you to get close to kiara as well as sarahs other new friends.

“yeah, alright.” rafe grunts. you may not talk to the boys, but that doesn’t stop them from trying to talk to you.

“i’ll call you when i need you to pick me up.” you unbuckle as rafe turns down the driveway, leaning over to press a kiss to his cheek. “i love you.”

“i know.” rafe sighs dramatically, hating that you’re leaving him, but not wanting to hold you back from seeing your friends, especially when you so rarely ask him. “i love you too.”

you wait as rafe gets out, opening your door and helping you down from his truck. he looks over your outfit again, glad that you’re very covered as he walks you towards the house, music already able to be heard pumping out of speakers.

“baby, this is not a little party.” rafe looks around, realizing theres a good amount of people crowded around the various seating areas.

“do you wanna stay?” you ask. rafe struggles, but ultimately shakes his head no. he knows if he stays that he would just end up getting pissed off at one of the pogues, and he values you too much to beat one of them up in front of you.

“mmkay, well i see kie.” you turn towards rafe. “i’ll call you in a bit. probably around 1 am if thats alright.” “yeah, i’m definitely not gonna be able to sleep until i get you back home.” rafe grunts. he’s in no danger of missing your call, there’s no way he will be able to relax until you’re back safe in his arms.

“bye baby.” you get on your tiptoes to press a kiss to rafes lips. “love you.”

“love you more.” rafe watches you walk away, literally skipping as you reach kiara, throwing your arms around her in a hug. rafe doesn’t see his sister, but he knows she can’t be far away.

“hey, pogues.” rafe walks up to a picnic table, jj smoking a blunt while pope and john b both hold a bottle of beer.

“rafe, don’t start shit-” jj begins, but he’s quickly cut off by rafe.

“shut the fuck up. i need you to watch y/n. if she gets hurt, i will fucking end all of you, understood?” rafe waits for all three of the boys to nod.

“im serious. i will fucking kill you. let her have fun with sarah and kiara, but don’t let her drink too much, and if any guy tries to talk to her or dance with her…” rafe trails off, but they get the point.

“she’s our friend too.” pope finally pipes up. “of course we will keep an eye on her.” “good.” rafe grunts, not saying another word before stomping away, back towards his truck.

“where is my kie kie?” your words slur as you stumble into the house, looking for your friend. “kiara!” you shout. “you never brought me back another drink you bitch!”

“hey, hey there.” jj suddenly grabs your shoulders, making you blink rapidly to get his face into focus. “maybe you don’t need another drink.”

“maybe you don’t need another drink.” you argue back, trying to wiggle out of jjs grasp. “i want a uh…” you look at the selection of bottles on the table. “shot of vodka!” jj knows you must be really drunk if you’re willing to take the shot, knowing how much you don’t like the taste of alcohol until you’re really far gone, always having to mix it with something fruity to get it down.

“okay, let me get it for you.” jj grabs a shot glass, keeping one eye on you as he shields what hes doing with his body, grabbing the vodka like hes going to pour it, but actually filling the cup with water instead.

“here you go.” he turns around with a smile.

“thanks!” you take the glass, knocking it back. “you know, rafe would not like you getting drinks for me.”

“hey, its all friendly.” jj smiles, patting your shoulder as you walk away to find kiara, yelling out again. he doesn’t see that you swipe a bottle from the table.

“i feel sick.” you shout at sarah, hands linked together. despite your words, you continue to dance, your stomach churning but there’s too much alcohol in you to care.

“i think if we drink more itll help!” sarah says, meaning to pull you towards the house, but you both stumble on the grass and end up falling on the ground, not feeling any pain as you burst out laughing.

“oh my god, we are sooo drunk.” you giggle, feeling a lot better now that you’re laying down, so you don’t make any effort to move, despite the stick poking your back.

“i know.” sarah pouts, before suddenly yelling. “john b!” it takes a minute for john b to make his way over, and when he finally does, he stands looking down at the two of you, hands on his hips.

“i think you girls may have had enough.” “sarah.” you turn to her. “i hate your boyfriend.” “me too, he’s trying to cut us off.” sarah rolls his eyes before reaching up, making grabby hands at john b, who sighs and helps bring her to her feet.

“come on.” john b tries to help you up next, but you frown, suddenly feeling overwhelmed by emotions.

“i don’t want you, i want my boyfriend!” you cry out, tears suddenly streaming down your face, leaving marks in your makeup.

“oh shit!” john b groans. “don’t cry! come on! lets call rafe.”

you finally accept john bs help up, tears drying up quickly when you see kiara, squealing as you rush away from the couple to link arms with her.

“shit, we gotta call rafe.” pope says, looking at you with concern on his face before glancing at his phone, the time ticking past 2 am.

“we should just take her home.” jj says. “i don’t have his number.”

“we can ask sarah…” pope looks around, before quickly realizing that sarah and john b disappeared together a while ago, and he’s not wanting to find them and break up whatever they’re doing for the sake of his innocent eyes.

“ill just ask y/n.” jj sighs, pope tagging along as he makes his way over to you, the last one dancing to the music, from the only speaker still playing.

“hey, y/n.” pope says softly, but you don’t seem to hear him as you continue to bounce around, hair long pulled out of the ponytail you arrived in, dress swishing as you move.

“y/n!” jj shouts louder, making you suddenly stop.

“what is it?” you blink rapidly, tears forming in your eyes from jjs shouting. “are you mad at me? is rafe mad at me?” “no, we just wanna take you home. its really late.” jj places a cautious hand on your back, guiding you away from the speaker.

“‘m not tired though.” you look to pope, hoping he would agree with you, but he shakes his head. no help there.

“how about we call rafe then, yeah? i think he’d beat our ass if either of us took you home.” “no he wouldn’t.” you shake your head. “my boyfriend is cute and perfect and nice and he wouldn’t do that.”

“alright, whatever you say.” pope rolls his eyes. he’s not willing to argue about the past, especially when he knows you’re way too drunk to even realize what you’re saying.

“ill call him.” you pull your phone out, frowning at the screen before your passcode suddenly comes back to you. rafes birthday.

you manage to navigate to his contact before the phone suddenly falls from your hands, thankfully landing on the soft grass. you barely turn away from pope and jj before you throw up, bending over as you spew.

pope moves quickly to hold up your hair, while jj picks up the phone, thankfully still open.

he presses the call button while watching pope comfort you as you begin to cry, sniffling out a mixture of words about how you hate throwing up and want your boyfriend.

“baby?” rafe answers, his voice soft but clearly tired and slightly on edge.

“uh… no.” jj answers awkwardly. “she’s ready to be picked up though she’s uhh… pretty drunk.”

“i’ll be there in five minutes.” rafe puts the truck into drive. he would never admit it, but he’s been just down the block the entire time, not wanting to go too far in case he needed to quickly get to you. “give her the phone.”

“yeah, alright.” jj hands it over to you. “its your boyfriend.”

“oh my god, rafe!” you shout into the phone, making him pull it away from his ear at your loud volume.

“hi baby, i’m coming right now to pick you up, okay?” “i love you so much.” you sob out. “i miss you, i miss you. i hate partying without you.”

“how much did you have to drink?” rafe asks.

“she snuck a bit more when i turned my back for one second rafe.” jj adds in, leaning closer to the phone to speak. “we really did keep an eye on her.”

“yeah.” pope chimes in. “one guy tried to dance with her but i stopped him.”

“wait, really?” you question. you hadn’t even noticed, or maybe just didn’t remember.

rafe doesn’t know what to say. he’s certainly not going to thank the pogues, but he’s grateful you’re safe as he turns down the driveway, headlights illuminating the three of you standing in the yard, the only ones still around as he throws his truck into park.

“yay!” you squeal, running over to rafe and literally jumping into his arms, making him stumble back as he holds you against him.

“hi baby, did you have fun?” rafe asks, rubbing his hand over your back as the other keeps you from falling. “i did but i drank too much and got sick and then starting crying because i missed you.” you explain quickly, all negative emotions gone now that you’ve got him back.

“should i get you home then?” rafe asks, glad when you nod enthusiastically, tucking your face into his neck.

rafe looks to pope and jj, nodding awkwardly at them. its the best thank you they’re going to get as he loads you into the passenger side of his truck.

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animehideout · 4 months

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Hii! Its my first time requesting something like this but...

I think that it would really be a good idea tho

Insecure Reader x Jjk Men Finding Out

Soo.. Lets say(for the concept) Reader has really been insecure about their body because of childhood trauma.. Thinking that no one would love them or give time to love them they tried to "sewerslide" but.. they fail and after some convincing from there family reader feels a bit better about there body not completely but its better..

Fast Forward A Few Years Later

Reader meets (jjk men) and both of there relationship goes very well (jjk men) were very touchy and clingy to reader... One day (jjk men) convince reader they should go clothe shopping.. while there at the store(can be any store).(jjk men) finds a dress .. they asked reader if they would like to try it.. reader at first says no thinking its way to revealing and memories come back from the past.. but still agreed she went to the changing room and went out to look for (jjk men)/ there bf but they dont find them?.. she searchs and finds there bf with a girl the girl is touchy.. and clingy to there bf/(jjk men) reader sees this and immediately thinks of the worst i mean the girl looked drop dead gorgeous.. there bf (jjk men) notices reader and goes to them ignoring the girl.. they then realized something not right.. reader isn't as clingy or Happy like she was earlier (There bf being there lover notices this and ask) "Reader/N/N.. are you feeling.." but stops mid way sentence they realize that reader keeps adjust the dress and squeezes parts of her body..

(Its up to you if its SFW or NSFW and if you want to Shorten it)

Insecure Reader X JJK Men Finding Out.

check out part 2 here

a/n: Thank you anon for submitting your request. I hope you like it, if you want part 2, or if your fav characters aren't mentioned here please let me know I'll make part 2.

Warnings: Mention of Suic*de / Negative feelings / Negative body image / Depression/ Slight smut.

Nanami Kento:

It's like Nanami was sent from above to heal all of your traumas. Your relationship was smooth he treated you with pure love and care. You already told him about some of your insecurities but didn't go deep into details, leaving your attempts to unalive yourself unspoken of, and hidden within you. To celebrate one of your close friend's bday, he took you out shopping to pick a dress for you.

“Try this one love, I'll wait here for you” .

You took the dress and rushed to the changing cabinet, for the first time you felt beautiful in something revealing, but that soon collapsed to the ground when you found him talking with a drop dead gorgeous lady, with a beautiful body and soft facial features. You observed how both of them spoke, how she was blinking slowly as she extended her hand to touch his forearm. It's like your world stopped. Nanami was the one who helped you temporarily forget about the shit you dealt with in the past but now the same man triggered it again, crashing the efforts you put in order to heal.

Visions of your dark times started showing it's like they were in full display, making you swallow hard, remembering how you used to stand in front if your mirror scolding yourself, attacking your innocent reflection with hate words as if you were your own enemy. You looked down checking your body, regretting that you agreed to go shopping in the first place.

“Excuse me” said Nanami to the woman the moment he noticed you. “Sweetheart, the dress suits you perfectly” he complimented you with a soft smile.

You hummed in return, your eyes still fixated on your own body, awkwardly trying to fix your dress with trembling hands.

“hm? everything is fine?” he asked with a frown.

“y-yeah totally” you lied.

But he picked up to you, noticing that you were feeling down and something changed your mood to the worst.

“Wanna go somewhere less crowded?” he suggested knowing that prolly need some alone time, out of sight.

You nodded slowly, putting back your outfit of the day, exiting the shop. You sat in a empty park, the whole time you were silent, too overwhelmed to find the right words that could express what you've felt. He observed you, giving you some time to compose yourself but he couldn't wait too long so he took the initiative and said,

“I understand how you feel, I-”,

but you cut him off, and he was faced with a side he never thought you had.

“NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THIS FEELING, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW YOU WAKE UP EVERYDAY AND FIGHT THE URGE TO KILL YOURSELF BECAUSE YOU CAN'T ACCEPT YOURSELF” you yelled as tears started streaming down your cheeks.

His eyes widened, taken aback by what you blurted out. “killing yourself?” these words lingered in his mind, he thought that your insecurity was something normal that anyone experiences but not to the point to make you hate your own existence. Before he could say anything you stood up and started walking away, but he stopped you grabbing your waist,

“you'te not going anywhere love, we need to talk”.

You struggled to break free but he trapped you between his arms making you sit back down on the bench with him.

“Tell me everything, I don't want you to carry any weight alone, I want to share it with you”.

You spent the whole evening venting, expressing yourself.. The more you talked about your attempts the more he held you close, scared of the thought of losing you. Once you finished talking, he spoke with his honey-like voice,

“I'm sorry you had to face all of that, you are beautiful, you are worth it, you are amazing the way you are! But we, humans tend to be harsh on ourselves, we tend to physically hurt ourselves to take our mind off of what we're feeling. But I don't want you to do that again, I don't want you to lose yourself to self hatred. I'm here to unburden you, to take your pain away, that's what lovers do.. I love you so fucking much and I'll always choose you, cuz my mind, body and soul crave you alone”

It's like you've been waiting to hear these words for ages, despite the comfort of your family and friends you've always took it as a flattery but Nanami succeeded in making you try to give yourself a chance to love yourself again.

“And about that woman, she was just trying to make me buy more dresses.. all what I want is you”

He made your heart flutter, he made you feel that it's okay to not be okay. He indeed took that weight that was burdening you for years. He promised to help you in the process of making you feel better again to completely heal.

“Nanami what if someone sees us” you chuckled when he started kissing your jaw,

“I don't care, I just want to show you how much I love you” he said between kisses as his strong arms tightened around you, pulling you to sit on his lap, making out till the sun went down.

Gojo Satoru:

It left you speechless when Gojo Satoru, the strongest sorcerer who could pull anyone he wanted, asked you to be his partner. Who would say no to Satoru, so you agreed despite the growing feeling inside you that you don't deserve him.

For the first couple of months everything went good, a lot of flirting, a lot of touching, but deep down you couldn't brush away the idea that he was dating you because of a bet, you were too insecure to believe that he actually had a real interest in you. You succeeded in hiding the dark thoughts that crept inside you, scared that sharing such stuff would make him see you as weak and non deserving of his time, so you kept it all to yourself.

But he proved you wrong when he confessed that his feelings towards you grew; he loves you, also you shared your first kiss together. He's a confident man, both in his looks and personality, and the fact that you're his partner boosted your confidence, making you try to put aside all of your past traumas.

Both of you were attending a very important party, so him being a good, rich boyfriend took you out to go shopping and spend his money on his one and only; you. You were too anxious to do so, cuz you knew he'll end up forcing you to try clothes on for him and make you swirl around. But you tried to stay calm and put on a smile on your face. He was extremely happy and hyped so you didn't want to ruin it for him.

“This is the one” he said his blue eyes glistening with excitement.

You would hesitantly grab the dress.

“Come on baby, try it on, let me see you”.

You rushed to the changing room mentally preparing yourself for any possible criticism. You tentatively walked out trying to adjust your dress, but no sight of Gojo. You frowned in confusion as you started looking for your boyfriend, only to find him talking to one of the boutique staff. Your eyes widened and you felt a sting in your chest. The fact that he didn't turn his infinity on and casually let her touch him made your self esteem drop instantly. Your mind became hazy with negative thoughts, making you doubt yourself and doubt his love for you. You felt completely overshadowed by her. She was so damn gorgeous and with Gojo being handsome, the thought of her being a better match for him took over your mind. It's like one of your nightmares came to life.

You cleared your throat, trying to get Gojo's attention, you were planning to tell him that you were tired and wanna go home, just so you can be alone with your thoughts. The moment Gojo looked at you, he quickly ran your way, completely ignoring the girl even though she was still talking.

“Damn you look hot, babes” he exclaimed scanning each inch of you.

You hummed looking everywhere but his eyes trying to avoid his gaze.

“I think this one suits you wel-..huh? baby?”

He was so quick to catch up with your mood swing. Immediately noticing the change in your energy and vibe.

“ just tired, can we go home?”

“Baby what's wrong you were all happy and excited, did I do anything wro-”

but he stopped mid way when he saw your hands restlessly adjusting the dress, and couldn't stop tugging on the cloth, clearly uncomfortable.

“I just wanna go home Satoru”,

you stuttered as you quickly rushed back to the changing room leaving him awkwardly standing there like a statue. You put your clothes on and left the shop, you could feel your panic attack building up and hell no you weren't ready to let anyone witness your break down in public, especially your boyfriend.

“WAIT BABE!”,

he quickly paid for the dress; he genuinely liked how it suited you, and he rushed outside catching up on you. He grabbed your arm and turned you around.

“Oh my..”,

he said when he noticed your glassy teary eyes. You sniffled and mumbled a little,“Im fine”

“No you're not! talk to me please.. you know you can trust me right?”

You swallowed hard, realizing maybe it's the time to let it out and make him face the real you, it was choking you so bad.

“I think we should break up Satoru” you started.

His heart started racing, his hands shaking.. “no..what did I do? I'll make it up for you I promi-”

“Its not your fault Satoru, it's mine. I'm not healed yet and I don't wanna burden you”

“heal from what? you're scaring me! tell me evey single thing, I wanna listen to you”,

he said seriously, taking your hands in his gently kissing it. You took a deep breath, he deserves an explanation.

“seeing you with that girl, it- it made me uncomfortable, you didn't even try to stop her when she touched you, I mean I know she's way prettier than me and you deserve someone who's on the same level as yo-..”

“Hey hey wait, where did all of this come from?” he would ask in utter shock. “First of all, she took me by surprise when she touched me, because I never activate my infinity when I'm around you or out on a date with date. Second of all, she's not prettier than you and no one is.”

You shook your head, refusing to buy into his words even though he was genuinely telling the truth. He would grab your face and force you to look up at him.

“Where did all of this come from?” he would ask again.

He finally succeeded in breaking through your exterior and learned about your past trauma and how you attempted multiple times to end it all. He would carefully listen to you speaking your heart out. His heart shattering into pieces, imagining how you dealt with that all alone and worse that's he's the one who stirred them back today.

“I understand if you don't wanna be with me anymore, I've always thought that you deserve much better than settling dor me”

He didn't say anything, instead his lips crushed on yours. Taking you by surprise. Pouring all of his love for you into that kiss, hia lips moving passionately and in sync with yours..

“My world is nothing without you, even in ultrnate universes I'll choose you over and over again”

He spent the rest of the day holding you close to his chest while cuddling in your shared bedroom. Literally doing everything to cheer you up again. Would constantly blame himself, apologizing on repeat

“I'm sorry, I wish I met you years ago, but I'm here now and I'll make sure you never feel that way ever again”

You'll end up comforting him instead, while he buries his face in the crook of your neck.

Toji Fushiguro:

Toji is an extremely handsome man with a ripped body, any human walking on this earth would be attracted to him from the first glimpse and that was the case for you. You tried to stop yourself from loving him, thinking that he wouldn't even notice your existence and might make fun of you for thinking that you stood a chance to be with him. But you were left dumbfounded when he confessed that he wants you. You couldn't help your feelings and felt weak in front of him so you accepted his feelings, and started dating. But doubt and self consciousness always had to kick in especially when both of you are in public and women can't keep their eyes off of him totally ignoring that you're standing next to him.

You stood there in the middle of the changing room tightly tugging on the dress that Toji picked out for you. You didn't feel yourself in it, it was too revealing for your liking. As if everything you were trying to hide for the past years is now exposed.

With caution you stepped out, you had to show Tojo after all. But to your surprise you found him talking with a girl, who had her hand on his chest, but he stepped back the moment she touched him; he's always been so loyal to you. But you couldn't help the heart break, and now memories from your past started overflowing your mind, making you feel so small in that dress, so ashamed for even trying it on. A lump formed in your throat, as you felt the room narrowing around you, leaving you completely suffocated.

When he caught you standing there while staring at him, he figured out that something was off. He always sensed your discomfort in public especially when someone tries to hit on him, he thought it was only jealousy where in fact it was way bigger and complicated than that, it was a past trauma that been haunting you. He walked towards you with a smile, circling his strong arms around your figure as he started praising you, trying to calm down what he thought ' jealousy '

“Damn you look stunning”.

But his words fell on a deaf ear, all what your mind thought about is how you used to isolate yourself and torture yourself with your negative self assumptions. He noticed how sadness was drawn on your face and how your hands couldn't stay still, continuously touching your body and dress.

“Are you okay? what's the matter?”

“Nah nothing Toji,”,you said voice cracking giving you out.

“Is it because of that girl? you know I've got eyes only on you right?”

“No it's not the case” you simply answered “Can we just go home now?”.

He nodded paid for the dress then both of you went home. You thought you'd isolate yourself in your room like what you used to do, break down in pieces alone while you feed on your dark thoughts for long hours. But this time Toji didn't allow it, your silence was hiding something knotted and he had to crack it. So he started bombarding you with questions,

“What's wrong?” “Come on tell me!”,

but the more you ignored his questions afraid of opening up the more you made him furious, and it quickly escalated into a heated argument. It's like rubbing salt on a freshly wound.

“why do you keep on fucking pushing me away? I'm so done with this kind of behavior”.

You couldn't take it anymore, so you blurted out all of your accumulated emotions, all the pain that had been smothering you for years.

“BECAUSE U DON'T DESERVE TO BE WITH YOU TOJI, I DON'T DESERVE ONE BIT OF YOUR LOVE.. look at you and look at me! you're just wasting your time with someone who is insecure and too broken to be fixed”.

He froze in place, it's like getting stabbed in the heart with the sharpest blade. It broke him to hear you confess this to him. He's always seen you as the most beautiful person that he ever laid eyes on, and was left stunned when he knew that you think the complete opposite of yourself.

“For how long have you been feeling this way?” he would ask taking a step closer to you, his strong features softening.

“Years..” .

“I just hope you can see yourself through my eyes..”,

without any further words, he would carry you to your bedroom, completely strip you of your clothes. You were too drained to stop him so you just let him do his thing. He climbed on top of you while taking off his clothes as well.

“My words might not convince you, but my actions will”.

He would make love to you for the whole night, making sure to kiss and caress all of your insecurities. Sensually whispering that's you're more than perfect for him,

“You're everything to me.. I live to worship your body..”

He would be so gentle making you feel good, making you feel loved and desired. Taking your mind off of your past issues. Proving to you that you are beautiful in your own way, boosting your self esteem.

“I love you, for you. Don't let these thoughts ruin us, I'll make sure to delete these insecurities forever.. you'll only be filled with me and my love for you”

.....

✨ 💌 I just wanted to say that it's okay to feel insecure or sad.. Feelings whether if they're positive or negative are what make us humans. But always remember that every person is beautiful in their own way.. you don't have to wait for anyone's approvement of you, be who you are, we only live once so let's make the best out of it, let's work on ourselves to satisfy ourselves and not others. You are perfect just because it is you!! You have your own sparks that no one else have, you're unique and special. Let's all of us do our best to be happy and to fully live our lives embracing the ups and downs. Wishing all of you a blessed life 💌✨

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dearladynightmare · 8 months

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Hello everyone! ^^

So, today I have to get out a deep topic that has been in my system since I watched the show for the first time.

It’s the fact that Entrapta has been trapped on beast island for months, thinking that she’s been abandoned once again. And it hurt me so much thinking about it. First the princess alliance abandoned her which, she didn’t knew, was a big misunderstanding. Then Catra betrayed her for real and sent her to die to beast island and on top of that Entrapta probably hoped in vain for Hordak to safe her. He‘s been the only true friend besides Skorpia she had made in the entire show! Almost everyone felt annoyed or stressed out because of her unusual behavior.

The only experience with most of the other protagonists were that they were angry with her, betrayed, used and abandoned her.

And when she was waiting for her true friend to safe her, she must have experienced all that pain over and over again, when she realized that Hordak wasn’t coming.

Didn’t she matter to him? Was it all a lie? Was their friendship just a wishful thinking? Why doesn’t anyone care about her? Did he use her for her skill like anyone else?

And THIS broke my heart. It’s not just that she and Hordak got separated. It’s the fact that she must have suffered a lot because all of her insecurities and self doubt were confirmed.

I mean she’s a smart woman maybe she considered that Catra lied to Hordak but why would he believe her?

I‘m going to talk about Hordak soon. Maybe tomorrow;)

Oh and before I forget! I loved drawing beast island!! It took me so SO long but I think it turned out beautiful:3 … I probably never do it againxDD

#hordak #entrapta #she ra entrapta #she ra netflix #entrapdak #she ra 2018 #she ra fanart #fanart #spop #she ra and the princess of power fanart #deep thinking #deeptalk #feeling insecure #beast island #betrayal #digital art #artists on tumblr

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flowerbedbaby · 18 days

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Ok so maybeee this is just me being depressed and insecure, and slightly obsessing over specific men, but I need a fic about citizen reader just feeling so emotionally drained and insecure about her body, scars and everything in general, so when simon gets home from deployment he's so confused why she's acting weird and distracted, but he's tired from being away for months on end, so this leads to reader feeling guilty and even more insecure

(I'm so sorry, I didn't know how to shorten the explanation 💀)

#cod headcanons #ghost x reader #ghost call of duty #simon riley imagine #simon ghost riley #simon riley x reader #cod ghost #cod imagine #simon riley #call of duty #comfort #self h@rm #feeling insecure

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flowerboy11300 · 1 year

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Anyone else just feel insanely unlovable?

#unlovable #im unloveable #feeling insecure #i feel like shit #i feel numb

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pricesbeltbuckle · 4 months

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Help??? I’ve been brain rotting thinking about simon riley like if you feel insecure or something??? like i can’t explain but yes

Insecurities - Simon 'Ghost' Riley

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Gn! Insecure reader

Warnings: Mentions of weight, ED, Insecurities, Starvation, Body dysmorphia

I know for a fact if you god forbid felt insecure he’s loving up on every part of you. “I don’t like how this shirt looks-” “Really cause you look perfect you want me to prove it to you?”

Now if it's more of a facial issue he definitely caresses your cheeks and comforts you and reassures you you’re beautiful in his eyes and he doesn’t understand why he can’t see the beautiful and kind-hearted person he sees in you.

Eating issues he’s definitely concerned about. If he notices you trying to avoid meals he’ll try and talk to you.

If you avoid talking to him he’ll wait until you’re ready to talk about what exactly is trying to make you starve yourself.

If you do tell him he’ll make your favorite comfort food and help you eat it while he snuggles on your shared bed and watches a movie/show you picked out.

If you have body dysmorphia either seeming too skinny or you seem more bloated and stuff he’ll reassure you your body is perfect to him no matter what size you are because you are always and will forever be perfect in his eyes.

Oh my god if someone made a joke to you about it, he’d kill them. “Isn’t that why-” “Shut the fuck up or I will shut you up.” and usually whoever is about to make a comment backs down after a masked 6’4 man threatens them 😭.

If you jokingly asked him to “Kiss the ground you walk on” He actually would just to prove how much he adores you

He likes taking showers with you, not for sex but for the intimacy of him washing your hair and him rubbing soap on you so he can praise you.

“God you’re so gorgeous.” “My perfect baby.” “I love you so much.” “You’re so beautiful right now I wish you could see yourself.”

I enjoyed writing this a lot. Actually, this was cute :(!!

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genshingarbage · 1 year

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hi there mod diluc! can i request a drabble/oneshot with diluc x fem (or gn) reader where the reader is insecure about their looks and feels like they're not good enough for him? kinda like a fluffy hurt/comfort? :)

Awe! Hey there, lovelyluc! Ofc I can do this, it was a nice breather from all the angst and smut that I have just brewing away behind closed doors, lmao!!! I hope this was to your liking! Sorry for keeping you waiting just really busy with personal things right now!! - Mod Diluc

Time and Time Again.

Diluc x Reader / Fluff-Comfort

Why does he like you.

It wasn't a question anymore. It was a demand you really wished to have the answer to.

Your fingers tapped incessantly against the oak tabletop surface you stood beside, your hand tightly wrapped around a wine glass, the flavoured liquid swirling inside fervently as your wrist rolled in circular motions. Your actions oozed with clear impatience and frustration; to what, however, was something only you were privy to right now.

You squinted your eyes and flared your nostrils as you bought the glass to your lips, taking a hearty swig of the beverage before returning back to your prior actions. Your mind continued to race with the 'what ifs' and possible 'whys.' But it was all for nothing without concrete evidence, theorising and speculation was never your strong suit. So you sighed out in exasperation, wishing to admit defeat, but the gnawing voice of no reason in the back of your head wasn't going to allow it.

You audibly groaned out now and rolled your eyes, your hand leaving the tables surface to rub against the side of your face. Your stubbornness was certainly going to be your ruin, so many questions to ask him, but no courage to voice them. Him being, of course, Diluc Ragnvindr; Mondstadt's biggest tycoon of the wine industry, the most wealthy soul and most eligible bachelor, well all of them were true except the last one now.

But that was the problem right now, wasn't it? He is supposed to be no longer eligible to single women out there, no longer a bachelor. For he is with you, happily, of course... right?

You took another deep swig of your wine after the realisation that he may not actually be happy with you. Maybe he married you only for convenience? Oh, Archons... what if he didn't like you at all?! What if you were just an easy option because he already knew you, a familiar face that could solve his problems?

Your eyes widened as the heaviness of it all began to sink your mind and heart into a pitiful state of despair and worry. He did always seem distant, didn't he? ... somewhat aloof to your gestures of affection and tenderness. Your glass is now empty and so placed on the table while you traverse the short distance to the storage cabinet stowed at the corner of the spacious and luxurious living room.

As you subconsciously manoeuvre around and fetch yourself another bottle of high-priced wine, your thoughts continue to swirl inside; he only ever shows for dinner and special occasions that require his presence with you, as if it was all just another task... another tedious duty... as if you... was just another mundane necessity.

Pop!

You blink rapidly as the sound of uncorking the bottle brings you back, and you don't even remember grabbing the extra strong alcoholic beverage as you watch the deep red liquid pour into your emptied wine-glass-now full. The unsteady wavering of the smooth contents locking your gaze in a sudden hypnotic power, watching as it rises and sinks left and right, till finally settling once the liquid no longer pours inside, steady, still, unmoving.

Much like your romantic life.

You whined to yourself pathetically as you placed the bottle down and swiftly lifted the glass back up to meet your dried lips and suddenly dried throat, swallowing more of the numbing buzz that slowly clouds you more into intoxicated cushioning. This was childish and certainly unhelpful. You knew that much, but what else could you do?

Nervously, you bit at your nail on your free hand unoccupied with keeping a steady hold on your glass, a nasty habit you obtained as a child when the nerves of failing in your parents eyes plagued your every waking moment, when things seemed to look bleak and wasn't going your way or in anyway that had been intended. And much like back then, that same dreaded feeling began to overwhelm you now. What if you're unattractive? What if your ordinary self is too plain for that level of extraordinary that Master Diluc so clearly was?

You never made mighty or outstanding achievements in your past. You never conjured up to much of anything worthy of note, let alone history defining. Your biggest crowned achievement was this, right now, your life, married in unison with Diluc Ragnvindr. It was something that made you brim with pride and unbridled love and happiness, your faint smile was fleeting as you reminisced on those sweet memories, before the darkness swept back over and left you alone with the mere thought of; happiness for you, sorrow for him.

The grip on your glass grew increasingly tighter, your knuckles whitening under the pressure, and your eyes also began to shine with a glossiness to them, tears threatening to spill. Was your true love only true to your heart? And not a shared experience with the man you'd held so dearly? You meekly rubbed the spilling tears from your cheek as some managed to escape you and drop onto the wooden surface you stood beside.

Click.

The door...

"Y/N?"

That voice...

No, no, no, not right now, he can not see me right now, not like this... no!

It was the very man you'd spent the best part of an hour stressing and crying over, his voice laced with concern as you heard the footsteps grow nearer and louder as he approached you from behind. You hated this! How was he so skilled at being so silent, only knowing he's nearby when it's far too late.

"O-oh, hello dear, I didn't hear you approaching." You tried to feign softness in your voice to hide the wavering tone behind it. You dared not to glimpse behind either. You feared seeing him right now. Eye to eye will only unleash the gates you're desperately holding under lock an key. So you remained faced stiffly toward the table and away from his heavy stare; "Naturally," he replied in that suave voice he naturally holds, "how else am I to keep my beloved on her toes?" He finishes with a soft chuckle.

Your heart aches, a smile forming ever so slightly on your now reddened face, your eyes still glossy and your cheeks somewhat shiny from the few tears prior. He jokes with you... would a man who loves you really care to entertain you? Your hand placed absentmindedly against your chest as you pondered: Diluc would, regardless, because he's always been a charming gentleman. To any an all. It did little to soothe your worry as much as it instead led you to admire him more, which resulted in your self resentment to blossom hotter.

"Y/N, you seem troubled, speak to me." He pleaded, though it sounded more of a demand. You were used to his stoic voice in most cases, that's why those odd times he did crack a joke or shoot a flirty line to you it caught you off guard and never failed to fluster you.

Suddenly, you felt his warmth press against you from behind, his arms slowly snaking around your waist to pull you more into him. His forehead resting gently on the base of your neck where your hair lay neatly braided, his eyes closed unbeknownst to you, of course. His body shifting ever so slightly to press tighter against you.

There was a thick awkwardness of dead silence after his request however, your mouth parted, but no words left you. You were losing yourself in your self worry, your self-hatred, all of it, and you closed your eyes to still your nerves that bubbled under the surface, threatening to erupt. He held you so lovingly, caressed you with earnest intent, showed concern, these are all acts a lover would surely portray to their beloved, in yet... something in your mind wouldn't rest, wouldn't leave well enough alone, and unfortunately, it took hold of your reason entirely and began to control your words.

"Do you love me Master Diluc?" You questioned.

"Master?" He questioned back. His eyebrows lifted ever so slightly in a quizzical expression as well as slight shock. You hadn't called him that title since the last day you served him or his family as a maid, since the day he proposed to you...

"Do you?" Your head instinctively began to turn, the itching desire to look the man in his eyes, in yet you froze, halted your actions and remained faced forward, eyes glaring down at your hands pressed against the tabletop, your focus locked onto the beautiful crystal smelted wedding ring the red head behind you had so gently slid onto your finger that faithful day.

"Y/N, of course I do. What is this?" His voice grew more stern now, stricter and laced with demanding expectancy. His grip on you began to loosen ever so slightly. The feeling of his grip softening only served to sting your heart harder. Could he not stand to you hold in an embrace for that long? Of course he couldn't, why would he want to? You're nothing.

You sniffed in sharply, a frail attempt to steady your racing heart that thumped aggressively in your chest, the blood rushing around and drowning your ears in white noise. You swallowed down the lump that had at some point lodged itself into your throat, a shaky breath exhaled past your lips.

"Y/N." He sounded annoyed...

"Why?" Your voice meekly replied back.

"Why what?" He sighed out, annoyed you'd answered his question with another question, yet still continued to humour you.

"Why do you love me?... no... how can you?" You spoke softly, it sounded as if it was meant only for you to hear, but with him pressed against you, his chin now digging into your shoulder softly and nuzzling against you, he was sure to hear it as well, and hear it he did.

"Why do you speak like this? Has something happened?" He began to deflect your questions now, the lack of a true answer doing nothing to calm your impending outrage.

"Yes, something did happen." You spoke clearly now.

"What." He was no longer asking.

"I've come to realise the truth." You replied, he pressed against you harder, only to glance down to see the two empty bottles of wine, and the currently opened high percentage one, your wine glass beside your hand that was clenched and whitening moreso.

He let out a defeated sigh before pulling away from you, the cold surrounded you like an unforgiving villain.

"You've been drinking." He stated factually.

"And what of it?" You retorted with somewhat aggression.

"You don't realise the nonsense you're saying to me right now." He argued flatly. His distate toward alcohol was known well to you, but it never deterred you from enjoying it from time to time, or using it as a way to lessen the burden of realising you're in a loveless marriage with a man far too out of your league.

"It is not nonsense. And stop assuming I am drunk." You growled, still not daring to face him.

He crossed his arms now, the somewhat screech of his clothes echoing out while tightening on him as his arms flexed in his ruby red long coat.

"You'd be inhumane to not be drunk after consuming so much of that wine, Y/N, specially from my self made bottles." He groaned out like a disappointed father.

You breathed in deeply and decided fuck it, turning round to face him now, you wish you hadn't though...

His crimson eyes instantly captured you into a sudden lock you were too weak willed to break from, his anger mixing with concern clearly painted over his face also hurt you, maybe you had been acting irrationally... but... but no, you wasn't, you are not drunk, certainly not, and you know what you're saying is true.

"I am inhumane though aren't I, Master Diluc?" You narrowed your eyes to which he squinted back, his hand coming out open palmed in a gesture to explain, "and how in all of Teyvat did you summon this ridiculous statement?" He questioned.

"I am nothing more than a maid... it's all I've ever been... all I'll ever be..." Your lip trembled, your resolve dissappeared faster then your prior glasses of wine did when you was downing them oh so ungracious like.

You hadn't realised at that point the way Diluc's angered expression softened almost instantly, his strict demeanour breaking in record time and replaced with one of hurt and confusion, how could you have noticed? Your eyes were looking down at your hands, at your ring.

"I... I don't deserve a man like you, I was stupid to ever think I deserved more in life. I don't deserve to love you, a man so beautiful, so fierce and charming, so talented... a man... whom I was meant to only serve..." Your eyes began to fill with tears, this time the alcohol had numbed your senses of it all and so they fell freely, dropping into the delicately woven carpet beneath your heels, the very heels that Diluc gifted to you for your birthday only four weeks ago.

Your lip trembled harder, your voice lost to your grieving, "you should be married to a woman of higher stature, dignified purpose, like... like the acting grand master Jean, or Eula Lawrence, a woman of nobility to match yours... not a commoner with nothing to her name! N-not a shabby maid whose only purpose was to clean dishes and mop floo-!" You were suddenly silenced.

Your eyes widened, the tears halting in your glossy stare, blurred ever so slightly, but the feel of his lips were always decipherable, the tender movement of his guiding lips on yours well known, his gentle tongue caressing your own into a joint dance of the wet muscles inside both of yours mouths. He pressed against you softly, your hands flatly pressing against the table behind you now, the need to feel grounded to avoid falling.

Your eyes closed as you slipped into the blissful embrace of your lovers passionate and somewhat desperate kiss, he was a man of little words, he didn't know how to soothe a troubled person let alone his suffering lover, but he hated seeing you this way, detested hearing your words, those lies, all of it wrong. He didn't know how to make you see this except to embrace you, something he's now realised while engulfed in all that is your womanly beauty, he's done very little of, definitely not enough of.

Only when the burning need for air gripped you both in your lungs did he finally pull away.

Panting softly, his hands now pressing either side your smaller frame, keeping you trapped against the table, his red hair up in his signature high ponytail, yet a few strands now come loose and frame his beautifully sculpted face. His eyes deepening its glare into you.

"Y/N. Please stop." His voice sounded so frail now, so hurt and your flustered self suddenly felt ashamed.

"That isn't true... none of it, and you know it." His eyes trail down your body slowly, shamefully eyeing you, he made it clear he was attracted to you in the way his eyes hunger and lust along your frame, only to come back to a stand off with your own glossy ones.

"You may have been a maid before that much is true, but that doesn't define you, it never did. I love you, for you, I would not have gone through such hassle to learn from my broth..." his voice cut short suddenly and died in his throat, the pained expression on his face making you fully understand who he was suddenly remembering, "...Kaeya, when I was younger, how to win your hand in marriage and gain your love, now would I?" He questioned, his head tilting slightly as he did so.

He held valid reason there... even your cloudy and intoxicated brain couldn't rebute that fact...

"I..." Your voice couldn't come out, you was too overwhelmed.

"Eula is an astranged acquaintance, to whom I keep at friendly and polite distance, for the mere sake of nobility respect, and Jean is a very close friend of mine Y/N, and yes, I love her dearly." Your eyes began to drop down, the jealousy already threatening to consume you once more, but his strong finger and thumb grip your chin softly and guide your sights back onto him, his lips close to yours, his hot breath fanning across your face. "But she isn't the one I'm in love with Y,N,"

He drops your face now and suddenly engulfs you in his warmth, the embrace soft and welcoming, hugging you tightly into him and clouding your sight in darkness now as you close your eyes and nuzzle into him helplessly.

"You are." He gently places a kiss atop your head; his hands stroking your back and another locking your head into place to keep you pressed into him lovingly so.

You couldn't help the smile that broke onto your face now, as if a weight had been lifted from you, the darkness finally beginning to dissipate within your mind, inside your heart, nothing but your burning love for him remained now. He says he's a man of few words and doesn't understand how to woo a lady, but you find it increasingly hard to believe, he certainly is a master at reassuring your drunken hazy worries.

"I am sorry Diluc, I let my doubts consume me..." You apologised softly while still nuzzled into him, and his gentle strokes, soft caresses and pliant kisses on your head let you know he forgave you, and it made you feel that somehow, he always will... because it felt that bit more safe to believe him, in his words, that Diluc Ragnvindr, the charming winery tycoon and Mondstadt's Dark Knight Hero wouldn't let you suffer alone, now, or ever.

And then suddenly, you knew for sure that your comforting thoughts of this man, this strong and fierce man, your lover, your husband, your soul mate, were all correct when you heard him mutter against your head as you began to be lulled into a gentle soothing motion; "I will remind you how much I love you Y/N, Time and Time Again."

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cecilialisbon13 · 1 year

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Falling in love is so terrifying. To be completely vulnerable with a person. To open up and present my heart to them. To share all of my secrets, to show them the worst side of me.

The fear that they might leave me, when they get to know the real me is extremely frightening. Maybe, I have convinced myself that I am unlovable, so when anyone ever likes me, I think it's a joke...

"Say you're lucky, Say you're lucky to love me like you used to, even if it isn't true.

I want you to lie, lie right to my face ..."

- lie by shasha sloan

#relatable quotes #relationship #relationship quotes #loveislove #love poetry #relatable #i’m scared #overthinking #self loathing #feeling insecure #im unloveable #feeling unloved

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lovehungrybean · 1 year

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You make me feel Beautiful

Summary: Wanda has just given birth to the twins and feel insecure about her body causing her to push away yn.

Warning: 18+ *slight smut at the end*

Angst and fluff

————————————————————————

“Finally” you breathed out as your back hit the comfort of your bed. The past two hours had consisted of you and Wanda trying to get your two screaming babies to sleep. Nappy changes, singing, rocking,feeding and burping nothing seemed to satisfy the twins until finally now,12:30 am; on their own accord after having totally exhausted their parents silence was bestowed in the home.

Next to you Wanda also breathed out, the relief of finally being able to hear herself think clear. “ I love them both so much but god; having twin’s is difficult.” Wanda states as she turns to look at you.

You look back at your wife taking in her appearance, how strands of hair escape the confinements of the messy bun on the top of her head, the light blush present on her cheeks due to the ordeal of the past two hours. But you swear she just gets more and more beautiful by the day, especially seeing her become a mother you have never felt more attracted to her than now. You just wish she believed you when you would tell her.

“You look so pretty right now” you whisper into the quite of the night

Wanda avoids your eyes, “I look like a mess” she scoffs voice laced with insecurity.

It had been over two months since Wanda had given birth to Tommy and Billy, and the two of you had not been intimate since before the birth; not by lack of trying from your side but rather Wanda. Anytime you would try to instigate, she would make the excuse of being tired, which you would of believed but then she started getting changed in the bathroom with the door locked. And there also been occasions where you would try to hug her from behind but as soon as your hands get anywhere close to her stomach she moves away. This was especially strange as, Wanda’s and your’s love language had always been touch, ever since you first started dating.

“Hey, look at me baby” you reach out carefully entwining your hand with hers that lay on the matteress in the middle of the two of you.”I miss you, just let me hold you please?”you look into her eyes, lit only by the moonlight seeping through the window.

“I want you to but I just.. how can you still find me attractive, my bodies changed and I’m just so scared you’ll see all of me and just be disgusted”Wanda whispers, tears filling her tired green eyes.

Your heart clenches seeing your wife so upset.”is that why you’ve been hiding your body from me?”you whisper back. Wanda nods the tears falling down her cheeks. She removes her hand from yours to wipe them but you beat her to it carefully drying her tears with the pad of your thumb.

“I Remember when I first spent the night with you and I was so nervous for you to see all my scars, I thought they would make you see me differently, that you wouldn’t find me attractive enough, I felt like I was damaged,ugly.”

“They’re not ugly they tell a story, they’re part of you and your beautiful” Wanda states with certainty; upset that you ever though so lowly about yourself.

“Yeh I know that now because you helped me see them that way, I remember how you didn’t judge me you made me feel comfortable in my skin and I want to make you feel that way to.”

“Plus your body tells the greatest story ever. It has literally given the gift of life, it’s carried our two strong and healthy baby boys and I couldn’t be more proud of you if I tried. Your body represents strength and resilience and there’s nothing more beautiful than that, I swear.” Wanda looks for doubt in your eyes but sees nothing but sincerity.

Wanda gives you a soft smile before turning away from you, to face the window. You stare at her back defeated but before you can get up to leave Wanda reaches for your arm placing it around her midsection pulling you closer. She pushes back into you as you hold her tighter finally feeling her in your arms after what felt like so long. A few minutes pass and you hear Wanda’s soft breathes even out, signalling that she’s asleep, you follow soon after with a lazy smile on you face.

You open your eyes with a groan being awaken by cries coming from the nursery, you feel Wanda moving out of your hold but before she can your already up on your feet, “go back to sleep I’ve got them”

“Are you sure, you got up last time too” Wanda looks at you eyes still full of sleep.

“I’m sure; its the least I can do, you literally pushed them out , stay in bed” you smile bending down to leave a kiss on her cheek as you make your way to the boys room.

After giving the two babies a bottle and plenty of cuddles they were fast asleep again. You look down at them both asleep in their crib; how did you get so lucky. If ten years ago someone would have told you you’d have a wife and two kids, the perfect family; you would’ve laughed in their face. But here you are against all odds you made it, you and Wanda both did.

The clock reads 9am as you go back to your bedroom, with the intention of going back to sleep, but to your surprise you find Wanda standing at the foot of the bed, and you can’t help but notice the disregarded sweats and T-shirt from last night on the floor.

There your wife stood wearing a sexy red lace lingerie bra and thong set, with a black silk robe falling from her shoulders, much to your gratification; failing to hide much from your wandering eyes. You stand there in shock practically drooling from the sight of you wife, you hadn’t seen her without a sweatshirt for the past two months let alone practically naked.

Seeing Wanda start to play with her hand nervously breaks you from your trance and you notice the blush on her face getting more apparent, she catches your gaze before shyly looking down.

“Is it ok?” She whispers unsure, embarrassed almost.

You quickly move towards her, hands gripping her hips pulling her closer to you whilst she moves her arms up behind your neck, as your arms circle her waist, settling your hands on her lower back.

”it’s beyond ok, you look unreal, baby” you whisper into her ear, leaving a kiss there before moving your lips down to her neck, you bite down on her sweat spot making her release a breathy moan of pleasure. It’s musics to your ears. You know it won’t take much for both of you to reach a high seeing as you hadn’t had any skin on skin contact with each other in the last two months.

Taking you by surprise Wanda pushes you onto the bed before removing the black silk robe fully from her body before sitting on your lap.

You move your hands to grip her ass, giving it a squeeze causing Wanda to role her hips looking for friction to ease the growing tension. The thin material of her lace thong not doing much to hide her arousal that drips onto your thigh as she rocks back and forth.

Wanda reaches back to unclip her bra all whilst holding eye contact with you, almost as if she’s daring you to look down at her now exposed chest. Seeing how much of an effect her body has on you and how much you still crave her, grows Wanda’s confidence as she attaches her mouth to yours, kissing you passionately.

Wanda pulls away breaths heavy. She smiles at you as her eyes fill up, due to the overwhelming feeling of adoration and love before softly whispering;

“You make me feel beautiful detka”

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adisillusionedauthor · 1 month

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Could you do fic for Checo Perez with wife reader? He had some insecurity after his crash during race. He doubt about his ability to race because of the comments and criticism. She comforted him through it all with "You're the strongest person I know." Just something fluff and comfort. Thanks!! :))

I can't do it anymore - Sergio Pérez

Requested by: Anon

Masterlist<3

Pairing: Sergio Pérez x Wife!reader

Warning: fluff, bad English, a little sad, mentions of feeling insecure

Word count: 1073

I was in the team’s garage the moment I saw Checo crash, in a fraction of a second what was a happy day, ended up with me and him going to the hotel early, the drive home was silent, Sergio was staring out the window and I was driving, it was a strange moment. I don’t recall a moment where Checo and I weren’t talking and it made me feel weird, thankfully the drive wasn’t that long and as soon as I parked the car he was out of it, walking fast towards the elevator, I tried following him, but he was going so fast, I ended up riding the elevator alone and once I reached our room and entered it, I immediately noticed that the bathroom door was closed, I closed the front door and placed a ‘Do not disturb’ plate and knocked softly on the bathroom door: “Checo, honey… Are you in there?” I asked gently, it was a stupid question since I could hear his soft sobs from outside the bathroom: “I’m okay, Y/N…” He say weakly and I sat myself with my back against the wall next to the door: “It’s okay to not be okay, darling” I said, trying my best to comfort him through the door.

“I know sweetie, but not for me… I screwed up, I can’t screw up…” He said, his voice getting more and more strained from the crying: “Honey… Who said that? Everyone is allowed to screw up every once in a while… We’re humans… Now, can you please unlock the door? I feel bad that you’re all alone in that bathroom” I say gently, waiting a few moments and then I heard it, the door was unlocked but he didn’t open it. So, slowly I started to open it.

Inside I found a scene that made my heart clench, Checo holding his knees close to his chest to hide his face and his tears from me: “I’m sorry…” He apologized, for what I’m not sure: “Why are you apologizing my dear?” I ask sitting in front of him in that cramped bathroom: “I screwed up, I always screw up…” He said, hugging his knees closer to himself.

“Honey… There’s nothing to apologize for, the car malfunctioned, it could’ve happened to anyone…” I say softly, resting one hand on his knee, he raises his head and I finally see his face, tear stained: “But it didn’t, these types of things never happen to Max, it’s like… I don’t know, I think my time has passed and… I’m not cut out for F1 anymore…” He said, forcefully wiping his tears: “Stop… Honey, what happened today wasn’t your fault, the car was fucked… And that’s that, yes it didn’t happen to Max, but it could’ve… I’m just glad you’re okay and that you’re not hurt” I say gently, pulling his hands away from his face with one hand and with my free hand I wipe softly his tears and cup his tear stained cheek, looking deep into his eyes, hoping to reach that dark place that the insecurity had installed itself. He looked down and then: “I’ve seen the comments… From when Red Bull re-hired Daniel… Most people say they’d rather see those two in the car… That I shouldn’t be in the car anymore, that Max and Daniel are a better fit… And I wonder, what if they were right? What if… I’m not cut out to race next to Max? What if I don’t belong to Red Bull…? what if-” He started spiralling and I cut him off: “Stop… Those comments are wrong, all they see is the energy those two have and… It’s not your job to match that energy every day… I’ve seen a few videos, honey… Red Bull is where you belong… It’s made you stronger and better, not that you weren’t strong before… But it just made you even stronger… You’re the strongest man I’ve known… You endure so much from the team and from the fans… You’re amazing and I love you for that.” I say kissing his cheek softly, I pull away just in time to see his eyes tearing up once more and he pulls me into a tight hug, it’s a little awkward but I wouldn’t dare refuse him a hug right now. I hold him closer to me once I feel the first tears fall into my shoulder, his face hidden on my shoulder, I kiss the side of his face gently: “I can’t do it anymore… All the pressure to be perfect, to be like Max… I can’t take it… I want to stop after this season” He says, his voice muffled by my shoulder, but I heard him clearly: “That’s okay… Whatever you want, honey… This decision is yours and yours alone” I say, running my fingers through his hair gently: “You won’t be disappointed in me if I stop?” He asked, raising his head from my shoulder, his eyes seemed ready for me to say that I’d be disappointed: “Never, I married you for your sense of humour, the way you could always make me smile even when I was down, how your smile can light up a whole room, those and many other good traits are why I married you, but you being a driver wasn’t one of them, I love you and I know you love your job, so I support it and I’ll support whatever you decide” I say, cupping his cheek softly, his eyes glossed over once more and he hugged me a last time before he stood up: “Let’s get out of the bathroom, my knees are starting to hurt.” He said softly, offering me a hand with a faint smile. Once I took his hand and stood up in front of him. He hugged me one last time: “Thank you… For being supportive and… For respecting my decision… For being this amazing person you are… I love you.” He said holding me closer to him, we left the bathroom and decided to have a night in, we ordered takeout and watched a movie, cuddled up in the hotel bed, that night I realised Checo was truly the strongest person I know, he endured so much in silence, but now everything was better and he’d be okay, we’d be okay, because we have each other, so as long as it stays like that we’ll be okay.

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relatablr · 1 year

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Sometimes when i get insecure i remember what i look like and get more insecure

#relatable quotes #relatable memes #relatable shit #i hate this #hate myself #i want to die #feeling insecure #insecurity #sadbeautifultragic #current mood #leave me alone

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currentlynappingg · 1 month

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i HATE acne. Like get off my face silly! You don’t belong there!🤗🙏🥰

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cherisigloo · 23 days

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i wish i was as pretty as the girls on my tiktok fyp

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bug3y3ddd · 13 days

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gotta spend at least an hour before i can go outside

#feeling insecure #lana del rey #lizzy grant #mazzy star #i’m just a girl #girl interrupted #this is what makes us girls #girlhood #girlblogging #this is a girlblog #lily rose depp #jennie #dollette #coquette #indie sleaze #sophia coppola #slyvia plath #lisbon sisters

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weak4skz · 1 year

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Han Jisung x Reader

Genre: friends to lovers, angst, fluff, eventual smut

Word Count: 1.3k

Summary: Han and y/n have been friends since before they could remember. But what happens if their friendship is severed by an unfortunate situation and Han goes off to be an idol while y/n is in college. When they connect through a mutual friend, what happens then?

WARNINGS: insecurities, weight issues, body dysmorphia, bullying, toxic beauty standards, name-calling, self-harm (tell me if I should add anything else!)

A/N: first fic up. idk if I should make it into a series though. I hope you enjoy and I would love some feedback :)

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“Come on y/n” Han whined out from on the couch beside me. “We both graduated. I am not watching your dumb romcoms all night as ‘celebration’ let’s go and actually have fun.”

“First of all, they are not dumb Jisung” I started. Second of all, where would we even go to have fun? One of those dumb house parties?” I finished my response. We both sat on my living room couch, me in one of the t-shirts I stole from him some time last week. Han had been trying to convince me to go to one of his friend’s house parties for the past hour. Parties were never really my thing. I would much prefer to stay home and watch one of my ‘dumb romcoms’ instead. Han, on the other hand, was much more of an extrovert than me. My job was to pick him up from parties on the weekend when he had a little too much fun.

“We are most definitely going to a party. And we are gonna be the hottest people in the room and we’re gonna dance until we drop.” Han replied, already pulling me off the couch. “Now go put on something nice so we can go.” He had already somehow pushed me to my room and shut the door. Something nice. I thought to myself, silently walking over to my closet.

That leads to the second reason I don’t like going to parties. I am not exactly the right shape to wear something one defines as ‘something nice.’ Sure I wear a sundress here and there and even a fitting top every once in a while; I am not fit for the house party definition of something pretty. I am not pretty enough to wear the tight black dress that rests permanently in the back of my closet, I have too many curves for that. So, as always, I picked a pair of wide leg jeans and an oversized graphic tee. Not because they’re comfortable, not because I don’t want to wear dresses. I simply wear them to hide the things I don't want others to see, things I don’t want myself to see. I hide thick thighs behind the dark blue denim and rolls of all shapes and sizes under the black t-shirt. Not because I love the clothes, I don’t even enjoy wearing jeans. Simply, because they shield me from the truth: I am not pretty. Not pretty enough for Han, not pretty enough for my parents, not pretty enough for society, hell I’m not even pretty to myself. Well shit, now I’m crying. Great fucking job y/n. I silently wipe the tears, at this point it’s part of my everyday routine. I walk over to my vanity and reapply my mascara, wiping off the bits that are now falling down my cheeks.

“ARE YOU ALMOST DONE” Han shouted from outside my door, bringing me out of my own little world. “Yea, almost” I replied, trying to hide the fact I was just crying. I finished touching up my makeup, and walked towards my bedroom door.

I took an extremely long time getting to the door; dreading Han’s reaction to my outfit for the party.

“Let’s go,” I walked past him and towards the door, not looking at his reaction. I pick up the keys, silently signaling to Jisung I’m driving and walk out the door towards the car.

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After the longest fifteen minutes of my life, we arrived at the party. I immediately feel uncomfortable as I get out of the car. The flashing lights and loud music I can hear coming from inside informs me of the headache that’s about to arrive.

Han pushes me inside and all I see is people. There are probably 100 dancing teenagers shoved inside this two story house. Han immediately leaves me to my own devices after spotting someone he knows. I think I heard him say ‘he’ll be right back’ but i couldn’t really tell over the music. So, as the introvert I am, I look around the room for a corner to hang out in until I go home. I make my way over to the first empty corner I see and pull out my phone so I don’t look like a loner.

I have been sitting in this corner for about twenty minutes until I feel someone approaching me. I internally cringe because they reek of alcohol and sweat. I look up when the said person taps my shoulder.

“Hey baby. Are you here alone? I could keep you company” he slurs out, clearly drunk.

Ew “No thank you” I say trying my best to muster a polite smile.

“Come on baby, I know you want some company. Just come wi—”

I didn’t even let him finish before I slapped his hands off of me and pushed him away.

“I said no, so back the fuck off and go away.” I said through gritted teeth. I swear this was the last thing I needed tonight.

“ Listen here you little bitch. I was just trying to help you out but here you are acting all high and mighty. Well guess what, you are not even half of any person in this room. You're not hiding anything by wearing baggy clothes, you fat bitch.” The guy, whose name I don’t even know, started yelling out of nowhere.

Great. And I thought my night couldn’t get worse

Before I could make my emotional response; I reminded myself that this was bound to happen at some point. I remind myself that some people hate me like I hate myself. So I numb myself, blocking out the outside world. Reminding myself that I say the same things about me everyday.

I brushed past the drunk guy and the crowd of people that decided to watch to look for Jisung so I could ask him to leave. I scan the room and my eyes land on him. He was already looking at me with sympathy? Or worry?

Shit he knows.

My best friend, and crush, just saw me get utterly humiliated by having my biggest insecurity revealed to more than half of our graduating class. And even better, he didn’t do anything. Well, I couldn’t really blame him. He was standing next to some girl, a really pretty girl. She was cute: on the shorter side and she was really skinny. She had perfectly clear, pale skin and big doe eyes. She was everything I’m not; and at the same time, she was everything I wanted to be. Judging by the rumpled clothes, smeared lipstick, and puffy lips; I could only guess what they were doing.

Trying to escape the limelight suddenly sprouted on me; I give Han a quick thumbs up to signal I’m okay and wave my keys signaling I’m leaving before walking towards the door.

I turn back, hoping to see Han behind me, but instead; I see him tonguing the pretty girl’s throat.

Hope is for suckers, I remind myself. I remind myself that a guy like him could never like someone like me. That he just sees me as a friend, or even a sister.

With that, I leave; dragging my heavy thoughts with me.

#feeling insecure #insecure #insecure reader #han jisung #han x reader #han jisung x y/n #han jisung x reader #angst #fluff #stray kids #skz #stray kids x reader #skz angst #skz imagines #han jisung imagines

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