#healing abuse

[unwelcome-ozian]

#trauma #healing abuse #trauma recovery

[moonlit-positivity]

Things I wish someone had told me before I started my healing journey:

- This shit is HARD. This shit takes TIME. You cannot just talk about it once and then move on, like there is a whole ass process behind this shit and it actually takes a lot of time and patience???? What the fuck.

- Denial is a natural part of the process. Resistance is a natural part of the process. Avoidance and escapism are a natural part of the process. Dissociation is a natural part of the process. All of these things are natural defense mechanisms our bodies and brains do to keep us protected and safe from danger. The sooner you learn this the easier it gets to find compassion for yourself.

- Do not tear yourself down for the maladaptive things you had to do to find peace before this, do not tear yourself down ever for needing to do things that helped you survive, you are entitled to your anger and escapism it is your birthright for simply being born to a world hell bent on destroying you from a young age.

- THE GOAL OF HEALING SHOULD BE ABOUT YOU. YOU CANNOT HEAL YOURSELF FOR THE SAKE OF SOMEONE ELSE. that means if someone is pressuring you to heal, it's not your time yet. You will be resentful and not open and receptive to the journey, bc they have made it about them and not about you. This means that if you are choosing to heal in order to heal someone else, it will not work the way you think it will. You will be resentful when the person you want to fix is not able to match your changing energy. This means that if you put another person's wants and needs above your own while healing, you will neglect your true self. The entire process of healing is a process you enter BECAUSE YOU WANT TO, BECAUSE YOU TRULY NEED THE GROWTH- PERIOD. BECAUSE YOU GENUINELY DESERVE A BETTER HEADSPACE, YOU GENUINELY DESERVE A BETTER OUTLOOK ON YOUR SELF WORTH AND SELF ESTEEM, AND YOU CANT BE FORCED TO DO THAT IF YOU DO NOT FEEL LIKE YOU ARE READY TO DO SO, AND YOU ALSO CANNOT DO THAT WITH AN ULTERIOR MOTIVE TO CHANGE OR FIX SOMEONE ELSE IN ORDER TO FULFILL YOUR CHILDHOOD DESIRES OF BEING LOVED. The good thing tho, is that this is a lesson you automatically learn the more you heal!

- Empathy and compassion are not always inherent to learn but can be taught through the kindness and compassion that others give to you, so it's a good idea to find people who can fill your cup with these qualities but who also have great boundaries so they can properly help you while maintaining their own self care.

- There is in fact a better way to do things, even if its really hard and seemingly impossible to learn- just being exposed to new concepts can be enough to jumpstart better habits

- That being said tho, things do not change overnight. Things change when you are ready for them to change.

- contrary to popular belief you do not actually have to do the coping skills exactly 100% correctly in order for them to work, you can absolutely give some wiggle room to incorporate your own twist to them and find ways to make them your own versions

- your emotions are not always the problem, it's how you handle them that counts. Every emotion has a purpose. Your negative emotions are precious parts of you that just want to be held and listened to. The sooner you learn this, the easier your life will become. Your anger, jealousy, bitterness, they all have a function, to tell you when you are hurt and in need of connection and communication with those you deeply care for. Take the time out to learn how to care for and handle your emotions and it will teach you more about yourself than you could ever dream of.

- how you talk to yourself during moments of panic, distress, vulnerabilities, and darkness, makes all the difference in the world.

- healing has its own language and eventually you will be able to tell when someone is putting in the work or not, you will absolutely get to a point where you can immediately spot the red flags in others around you

- gentle parenting videos are goated for quick reparenting tools

- journaling doesn't always have to be writing pen to paper, journaling can also be venting to a friend/private space, drawing doodles, venting out loud to yourself, or writing in code (for when you are too afraid, fearful, or paranoid to talking about what you went through but everyone is screaming "journaling!" at you as if that's gonna magically solve all your fear)

- there are gonna be times that absolutely break your spirit. There are gonna be times when you're crying so hard that you just want it to end, times when you might just find yourself screaming to a Baptist Mass Choir recording of Order My Steps on repeat while praying to a God you don't even believe in, because this shit is so absolutely batshit insane that you can't help but throw your middle finger to God and ask his bitch ass why the absolute fuck did you put me here in this bullshit and expect me to be okay with that?! What the absolute fuck is wrong with you you piece of shit?! And that's a perfectly 150% fine and completely 150% normal part of the process too.

- there is always. Always. Always. More work to do. You will think you finished processing something and then 10 more things will pop up after that. It's exhausting and this is why you feel so drained all the time.

- You will most definitely need to backtrack. You can process something to the point that you thought you understood how you felt about it and then 2 weeks/3months/10 years later it will hit you in a completely different context and then you will need to go back and find new pieces you never even saw before. This shit is a never ending, life long, stream of consciousness and it never. Fucking. Ends.

- LEARN HOW TO TAKE A BREAK. FOR FUCKS SAKE LEARN HOW TO FORCE YOURSELF TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. YOU CANNOT BE DOING THIS SHIT 24/7 LIKE JESUS FUCKIG CHRIST TAKE A BREAAKKKK.

- there are a lot of healing & emotional work videos on insta and tiktok from a wide variety of creators, some will be trauma informed and educational, but some may be spiritualistic or opinions from people on the same type of healing as you are. Some of those opinions you will love, and some you will not. The beauty is that you can find a community in these places but please remember your boundaries bc social media can be equally as toxic as it can be helpful.

- tbh the same can be said for things like therapy, self help books, etc, because not every recommended book or therapy out there is gonna be your cup of tea, some of it might piss you off where others might find it useful and helpful, and thats 100% normal and okay too.

- there might be a time when you have to cut people off, people you never even imagined yourself leaving or separating from, family, friends, jobs, etc. in order to keep yourself safe. This will be some of the hardest shit you will ever have to do.

- two things at the core of healing: grief and safety. How to mourn the great disappointments you've been through, and how to keep yourself protected & afloat while mourning.

- there will be times when shit don't make no goddamn sense at all. Like, none. That's normal.

- greatest life hack there is: focus on what you can control. Can you control it? You can change it. Can you control someone else? Their thoughts, words, and actions? No. But you can control yours.

- venting is actually so healthy. So so so very healthy. Find good places to vent.

#healing #recovery #ptsd #inner child healing #inner child #trauma #boundaries #self worth #self esteem #shadow work #cptsd #abuse #healing abuse #emotions #emotional work #emotional intelligence

[zeldasnotes]

”It is never too late to be what you might have been.” 💘

#self love #self healing #healing #self esteem #starting over #loveyourself #trauma #abuse survivor #sa survivor

[girlyteengirl16]

healing is taking too long what if i just kill myself

#trauma #i wanna kms #mentally tired #i want to die so bad #mentally unstable #recovering is hard #healing #i can’t move on #mental abuse #tw depressing stuff #tw depressing thoughts #i want to be okay

[pixieverse-icedtea]

i wanna go back and hug my younger self so bad, that little girl went through so much

#mental health #mentally exhausted #mental abuse #mental illness #autism #pda autism #audhd #self love #self care #self healing #self worth #self help #self awareness #self improvement #self esteem #inner work #inner strength #inner child #inner peace #positivity #positivity blog #spilled heart #spilled words #spilled ink #spilled feelings #spilled thoughts #light academia #classic academia #romantic academia #dark academia

[clowndensation]

thinking about connor in prague saying "dad's theory was you got two fighting dogs, you send the weak one away, you punish the weak one." in relation to this episode, and the way the siblings view abuse inside their own family.

shiv and kendall and their belief that connor and roman are the weak dogs that got the brunt of logan's worst behavior, because abuse is reserved for the kids who can't behave - the ones who aren't smart and mature enough to make it in the world. abuse evokes pity, because abuse is what happens when you expect too much from people who obviously aren't capable of more.

and then they go forward in life, believing that they're just naturally more intelligent and more capable than connor and roman, as if being raised seeing what happens to you if you aren't a perfect child wasn't the entire point of the "punish the weak dog" mentality that logan instilled in them. the looming threat implied behind any praise they do receive that tacitly tells them "you're not like roman and connor" because everyone knows what happens to roman and connor.

the absolute height of the rich capitalist mindset. "we're succeeding because of our own merit, and other people fail because they don't have what it takes" when in reality they're succeeding because of arbitrary rules made up by someone who knows that infighting makes meaner dogs.

#he's literally putting them in a position where admitting that he abused them #forces them to admit that they're 'weak dogs' just like roman and connor #and that's SO antithetical to their own image of themselves that it would destabilize their entire worldview to admit that #and so they're stuck in this state of being able to admit that their dad IS abusive and he IS an asshole #but are absolutely unable to view themselves as receiving of that abuse #because being abused means being a victim. and victims are weak people who get fucked over. #and if they're weak people than how are they ever going to beat their dad? #they're so wrapped up in the worldview logan raised them in that they're completely unable to see #that he's set them up in a game they can't win #you can't heal from abuse if you can't admit that the things that happened to you were abuse in the first place #succession #also you may be asking 'vinnie didn't you make a post just like this last night' #and the answer is yes. but i'm still thinking about it. so.

[furiousgoldfish]

May you find someone who is gentle to you. May you get a person who sees you and figures you out, only to be consistently kind and understanding to you. Someone who finds it easy not to prod you where it hurts, and to respect that some things are uniquely painful to you. Someone who has the patience for all of your triggers, without trying to fix them. Someone who lets you take all of the steps in your recovery on your own, but cheers you on, on every step of the way.

#positive #reassuring #recovery #healing #child abuse #support #abuse support #trauma support #gentle

[desultory-suggestions]

You are not defined by what happened to you

#recovery #suggestions #suggestion blog #healing suggestions #csa recovery #abuse recovery #dv recovery #text #mental health #ed recovery #self care #self love

[dailydiarynquotes]

#breakup recovery #breakup #heartbreak #sad love #soul ties #healthybreakup #moving on #daily diary #diary #heartache #narcissistic abuse #narcissistic trauma #narcissism #raised by narcissists #narcissisticgaslighting #Gaslighting #gaslight #healing #mental health #healing from trauma #self healing #healingjourney #if he wanted to he would

[truelovescamrecovery]

3 Powerful Ways to Rewire Trauma

How can we restore our ravaged nerves and rebalance ourselves in the aftermath to heal the post-trauma...? Get back to ourselves.

Rewire trauma sustained duringthe relationship that wasn’t.Bring up stored deep brain patterns of feeling good. Rewire trauma sustained during what we thought was a real relationship. During these hijackings, trauma is sustained and prolonged. We undergo an overload on our nervous and adrenal system. Simple methods bring us from the dark side and into the healing zone. Humans are amazing. We…

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#dating a sociopath #getting over a narcissist #healing abuse #healing after a bad relationship #het verlaten van een oplichter #hoovering #how to heal trauma #laat &039;n swendelaar #laissant un escroc #leaving a sociopath #post traumatic stress ehaling #recovery joureny #what to do in post trauma after buse

[binxelf]

things you can do despite your sense of guilt

- go for a walk even if you think you don’t deserve it

- have a snack even if you think you don’t deserve it

- take a break from studying even if you think you don’t deserve it

- reach out to someone even if you think you don’t deserve it

- demand, have needs and wants even if you think you don’t deserve it

- make it through the day even if you think you don’t deserve it

- feel mentally exhausted albeit seeming physically fine

- feel the sense of abandonment despite the company of those around you

- go to bed early despite not having done much according to your mental routine

- let out a deep breath even if you think you weren’t holding one back

#writing #lovecore #self healing #self love #wholesome #heartcore #healing #mental health #mental wellbeing #mental health awareness #mental heath support #happeycore #mentalheathawareness #love #advice #mentalstrength #reminder #self care #self care reminder #mental abuse

[moonlit-positivity]

Just because you went through something dark and dangerous and something that nobody else in society wants to talk about or acknowledge, doesn't mean that it never happened. It happened. And you have every right to talk about it if you so choose! You have every right to break the silence around what happened to you. You have every right to call out the people who hurt you and told you it was normal. You have every right to talk about it, whether the people in your life support you or not!!!

#recovery #ptsd #trauma #boundaries #mental health #healing #bpd #toxic friendships #toxic relationships #abusive relationships #abusive parents #child abuse #healing abuse #codependency #alcoholism #sa #ed #eating disorders #ana

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Having survived abuse from people with mental illnesses, I know the urge to warn others to be wary of those mental illnesses. I know how often it can feel like that is your only power in life…the only action you can take against what you went through. But listen. Just because a mentally ill person caused you complex trauma, doesn’t mean you get to generalize and slander and malign every person with that mental illness.

You do not have to forgive your abusers. but you do have to heal without spreading stigma and misinformation. you do have to heal without antagonizing or dehumanizing others who are also just trying to heal. you have to help break the cycle. because nobody can heal alone.

#cluster b disorders #childhood trauma #abuse survivor #parental abuse #parental trauma #cptsd recovery #complex trauma #trauma recovery #cptsd healing #mental health representation #disability advocacy #adverse childhood experiences #npd positivity #bpd problems #personality disorders #manic depressive #did osdd #aspd safe #npd safe #bipolar disorder #psychotic disorders #mental health education #mental illness advocacy #cluster b #hpd safe #borderline personality disorder #social justice #antisocial personality disorder #narcissistic personality disorder #histrionic personality disorder

[nothing0fnothing]

hey I have some lived experience personal care advice I had to learn the hard way in my adulthood after growing up with abusive neglectful narcissistic parents. Maybe it will help someone else.

The most important room in your house to be clean is your kitchen. If you only have a few spoons and a whole house of mess, spend them on getting your kitchen clean, hygienic and tidy enough to be usable.

spending money on things that last longer or work better isn't a waste of money. You don't have to use the cheapest of everything because spending is bad work out what YOU think is worth splurging on.

Always buy the best shoes you can afford. Taking care of your feet is so important for your health. If you're afab the same goes for underwear, buying one pack of good quality, good fitting cotton breathable underwear will save you so much money on feminine care supplies if you get what I'm saying.

Get your feet measured in a shoe store. Especially if you're over 25 your feet will have grown since you were 18. I spent years thinking my body was wrong because my feet ALWAYS hurt. My girlfriend suggested we measure them and I realised I was in shoes two sizes too small. For years!! I didn't even know shoes were supposed to have space in them.

a cheap bottle of washing up liquid (dish soap) costs like £1 and can be used on basically every surface. Clean your counters, toilet, sinks, bathtub or shower, oven and hob with a scrub daddy and some cheap washing up liquid. It doesn't react with other chemicals and it cleans deeply and easily. I even use it on the inside of the shower glass where it collects that crusty water residue.

When bathing with an unscented bar soap everywhere first. Then wash a second time with your scented soap. The scented liquid soap isn't designed to clean you it's designed to make you smell beautiful.

Don't use scented soaps on your kitty. Don't use femfresh or other feminine washes on your kitty. Don't use feminine wipes on your kitty. You use your unscented bar soap you use on the rest of your bodh on your kitty once a day. That's all it needs.

You don't need sewing skills to mend things. A £5 sewing kit you keep somewhere in your house and maybe a 2 minute YouTube tutorial is all you need to fix holes in your clothes and make them last longer.

Cereal for breakfast is quick and convenient but aim to eat protein for your first meal. Things like eggs, meat, a protein shake, Greek yogurt. You'll feel fuller for longer and your body will appreciate it.

most things don't need to be ironed. For the things that need creases out a steamer is better for the fibres and easier to use. Simply hang up the item and hold the steamer against the creases.

#cptsd recovery #abuse recovery #trauma recovery #recovery #ptsd recovery #mental wellbeing #mental wellness #dysfunctional household #self care tips #self compassion #self healing #personal growth #self acceptance #mental health #emotional health #therapy

[lousydrawingsforgoodpeople]

#child abuse survivor #trauma survivor #toxic family #support #healing #recovery #self love #boundaries #narcissistic mother #abuse survivor #doodles #bad art #lousy drawings #doodle #creature #weird

[daughterofanarcissistwoman]

#inner child healing #reparenting #narcissistic abuse #people pleasing #codependency #fawn trauma response