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murciafire · 6 months

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Anatomy of a Hug

Pairing: Jason Todd x gn! reader

Summary: Sometimes, all you need is a hug

Warnings: none

Words: >500

Notes: now that finals are over, I finally had some time to squeeze this short little fic out. Cranked this out in like 30 mins because I just needed to write something and I’ve been dying to.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*

In the cages of our ribs, the fluttering of our hearts beats wildly against its prison in the hopes that one day it will be free. But it is a bird with a clipped wing, bound to our bodies but every so often, we give it freedom in the form of love in which it can soar and fly and fall. For a body without a heart would mean that vulnerability would cease to exist and all that we know of what makes us human. Strangely enough, no matter how much we believe we give our hearts to someone, it still remains within us, tucked away under the surface of our skin and bones and viscera. However, the form of love we all seek is to not give our heart away, but to find someone who will accompany it. For someone to see that bird in your chest and give it a neighbor.

Because when we hug and our hearts are pressed so tightly together, they sing and realize that they are not so alone in their cage. And Jason, who was so deeply in love with you believed that he wasn’t alone anymore, and his heart finally had found someone it could sing to. For no matter what the world had given him that day, whether it be pain, loneliness, betrayal, or love, happiness, comfort—his heart had yours next to it, pressed together like flowers between the pages of a book.

“Hey, hey, shh . . .” he said softly rubbing your back as he held you in his lap. You had been crying for the last fifteen minutes or so, but the weight you carried had started since the sun struck the sky. But that was what life was sometimes, and in seeing Jason coming home, what else were you to be other than be vulnerable? So of course, you cried, because sometimes—no, all the time—it was better to share the burden. You weren’t alone, not with your heart pressed against his.

“It’s okay, baby. It’s okay. I promise,” he whispered, rocking you slightly. He stroked your hair and kissed your forehead as you cried against into the crook of his neck, hiding yourself away from the world. But Jason wouldn’t have that, not right now. You could never hide from him because he never wanted you to face it alone. So, when your breathing slowed, and the tension slipped away from your body, he pulled back to look you in the eyes. He loved your eyes. Always will. He saw his future in them.

“There you are,” he murmured, brushing your hair away from your face. “There you are.”

Jason would always see you, in whatever form you were. Whether you were at your best or your worse. Because that was what being vulnerable was—a body with a heart. With your heart against his. It was just the anatomy of a hug.

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #red hood x reader #red hood #jason todd x gn!reader #red hood x gn!reader #jason todd imagine #red hood imagine #jason todd fanfiction #batman #dc batman #dc comics #batboys #batfamily #jason todd fluff #jason todd angst

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tsukkiibaby · 1 year

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blackberries ♡ - kita x reader

a/n: ok so here’s what happened with this one. i was mid-writing a medieval guard!iwaizumi au and barely got two sentences in before i got bored bc it seemed too similar to something else i was writing so i went on a walk to clear my head, got 5 mins in and BOOM thought of this idea. started writing then realized it fully sounds like a bridgerton/queen charlotte episode (fully ripping some info/ideas from those shows bc i cannot be bothered to find out if my info is accurate for the time period and i just finished queen charlotte and cried for like 30 mins) so enjoy :)

feat: shinsuke kita ♡ (idk what to call this...suitor!au?)

genre: fluff, historical, bridgerton-esque, kita is an all around gentleman

you’re beginning to think that your options have dwindled.

with a faint smile directed at the stoic man that towered over you, you bid lord ushijima from the kingdom of shiratorizowa goodbye, allowing your staff to escort him out of the sitting room and towards his awaiting carriages. from her spot on the other end of the plush couch, your mother chuckles dryly and stands, rubbing your shoulder gently before walking towards the door.

“you’ll find someone, dear.”

those same words have echoed in your head countless times in the past few weeks. spoken after you met with lord sawamura from karasuno – a handsome man, no doubt, yet you couldn’t quite engage in a casual conversation with him without feeling like you were being scrutinized. repeated again after meeting lord oikawa from seijoh, who monopolized the entire conversation, barely allowing you a chance to speak. and how could you forget the encounter with the baron miya’s twin sons, who spent the entire time bickering, abruptly leaving after only ten minutes? the constant repetition of those words now leaves you with an unsettling feeling in the pit of your stomach whenever your maid informs you of a potential suitor’s arrival.

you’ll find someone.

would you truly?

lord ushijima was pleasant enough, you suppose. however, your conversation with him unfolded much like the others, devoid of any genuine interest as the man gazed at you, discussing the strengths of himself and his kingdom as though he had rehearsed it numerous times, recited the same words to countless young women during the courtship process. void of passion and desire, much like the previous suitors had been. not only him, however, as none of them ever inquired about you, nor your family, nor if you had any interests. too eager to tell you what they thought every woman desired to hear, promising a life that you could only describe as lonely.

you despised it.

you were aware that this process could potentially leave you in a loveless marriage. witnessing your siblings and friends find that person that reciprocated their affection gradually eroded the little faith you had been clinging to - that someone could offer you a marriage full of love and passion.

you’ll find someone.

you ignore the repeated calls of your name outside your bedroom door the following morning by your mother after your maid was unable to get you out of your room, the two of them urging you to hurry up so that you can eat and get dressed to meet with another potential suitor. in reality, you’d rather gouge out your eyeballs.

“i do not wish to receive any visitors today,” you declare as you finally emerge from your room, shooting your mother a pointed glare as you pass her and head straight for the dining room. the two women follow you in silence, albeit a few paces behind, and though you cannot see them, you just know they’re exchanging a pointed glance at your reluctant demeanor.

“we only want the best for you.” you can almost hear the words coming out of your mother’s mouth. it makes you want to throw up.

but, to your surprise, they never come. your mother does not pester you as she silently joins you at the table, nor does she rush you to eat and start getting ready, even as you take slow, dramatic bites. she finishes her breakfast and stands from the table, offering you an encouraging grin, a stark contrast to the blank expression you wear on your face. slowly, she moves around to the other side of the table where you sit and stops behind you, gently sweeping your hair away from your face, allowing it to cascade down your shoulders. a tender kiss is planted on the crown of your head, and you inhale a silent breath.

“your person is coming, dear.”

you watch out of the corner of your eye as she retreats out of the room, listening to her heels click down the hall until the sound disappears, and you let out the breath you’re holding. the loud silence follows you as you finish your breakfast, eyes trained downwards, and the walk back to your room feels longer than normal. the idea of getting dressed, hair and makeup done up only for whatever suitor was to come to disregard everything you say and want in life had your stomach in knots, and not from your breakfast. you remove your sleeping gown and step into a more casual daytime dress, one that you always liked to wear when wandering the vast estate.

slipping out the back into your estate’s back garden, you pause under the feeling of the sun beating down the exposed skin of your arms and shoulders, your body instantly feeling light and refreshed. you smile to yourself and breathe in deeply, relishing the feeling of the fresh air and sunshine before exhaling. opening your eyes, you begin down the stone path, stepping further into the warmth of the sun. you suppose a nice walk in the warm weather would take your mind off of the almost impossible courting process.

or so you hoped.

you take your time as you stroll down the vast rows of bushes and flowers, bright pinks and lavenders and oranges lining the walkway of the back path. with very little clouds in the sky, you relish in the warmth, letting your mind wander as you walk aimlessly, eyes gazing around the arrays of lush flowers. rounding the corner of the far lawn where your berry bushes were planted, you’re surprised to see a small basket on the edge of the path, half-filled to the brim with blackberries. cocking your head to the side, you take a tentative step towards it, eyes glancing around you to look for the culprit.

“oh, i’m sorry,” a voice calls from behind you, and you feel your feet leave the ground temporarily as you jump in surprise, your hand flying to clutch your chest. you feel a hand ghosting over your lower back, fingertips swiping over the thin material of your long dress to steady you on the chance that you fall backwards. “are ya alright?”

collecting yourself, you straighten your posture and turn to face the source of the mystery voice. your eyes glance upwards, meeting a pair of shining brown eyes, reminiscent of honey under the radiance of the sun, and you have to clear your throat to avoid getting stuck staring at the handsome man with your mouth open like some sort of peculiar creep. he’s much taller than you, his large frame shielding the harsh rays from your line of vision. the top buttons of his jacket are undone, revealing glimpses of his skin beneath the semi-translucent white fabric of his shirt underneath. “yes, my lord,” you reply, taking a step back to dip down into a polite curtsy. “i apologize for disturbing you.”

“not at all, my lady,” he is quick to speak, extending his hand out towards you. you accept it gently, his touch soft and warm as his palm envelopes your own, the intensity of his gaze never wavering. “lord kita. i was here for lunch with the young lady l/n, but i’m told she is not receiving visitors today.” his voice drops to a whisper upon delivering the latter part of his sentence, his lips curving into a cheeky smile.

heat flushes your cheeks under his unwavering gaze, and the playful tilt of his lips at least assures you that he at least has a sense of humor. “i apologize, my lord,” you apologize sheepishly, dipping into another curtsy with your head bowed, cheeks burning as you avoid his watchful eyes, and you hope he attributes the blush to the sun’s warmth.

he chuckles lowly, reaching down to retrieve the basket of blackberries, capturing your attention with his slow, careful movements. “no need for apologies, my lady,” he murmurs. “everyone has their bad days,” he says, eyeing the supple berries that fill the basket. “i have a garden similar to this at my estate back home. when i feel weary or overwhelmed, i tend to wander the lawns. even at night, if i have trouble sleeping, i find solace in coming out to the garden, sitting on one of the benches to observe the stars or just strolling under the moonlight.”

you slowly raise your head, shyly allowing your eyes to meet his. “you do?” you’re not sure any of the other men you’ve met would even admit to having bad days.

he nods, a smile gracing his plush lips. “it makes me feel more at peace with myself,” he says simply, turning to face the row of lush berry bushes adorning the path you both occupy, his long fingers reach out towards the blooming fruit. “when i find myself tired or burdened, tending to the plants and flowers help soothe my soul. it provides me comfort, even in the darkness of the night.”

a fleeting glance over at the striking man leaves you mesmerized. his subtle repositioning under the sun grants you a captivating view of his radiance, and you have to will yourself to look away before becoming entranced by the enchanting lord. he plucks one of the berries from the bush and twirls it in his fingers, then turns back to meet your inquisitive gaze, his eyes radiating admiration. “the dowager baroness l/n mentioned your extensive garden on the tour of the estate this morning, and offered a basket of berries as a token of her gratitude for me coming all this way,” he murmurs. “if it pleases you, my lady, i had intended to reciprocate the gesture by presenting them to you in the form of a pastry?” the latter half of his statement comes out almost like a question with the way his voice drops, as if the suggestion would offend you.

his eyes burn into yours, leaving you immobilized, unable to move. your mouth is dropped open, the words unable to form in your brain, rendering you speechless. you nod eagerly. “yes, of course. please, accept my deepest apologies for troubling you, lord kita.”

“shinsuke is fine,” he corrects you quickly, a permanent smile etched across his face. it’s bright and feels familiar, one that threatens to unravel your composure if he continues to look at you with such fervor.

the smile you offer him in return is wobbly, and you can’t help but shake your head. “my lord, i-”

raising a hand to stop you, he reaches out to grasp your much smaller one. “it’s quite alright,” he assures you, gently wrapping his fingers around your palm. the touch sends sparks through your skin, your whole body reveling in the warmth. “i am only interested in getting to know you better, my lady. how are we to achieve that if you do not know my given name?”

you meet his gaze for only a moment before turning to laugh quietly, a trace of hesitation in the sound that leaves your throat. “i suppose you are correct,” you concede, turning fully to admire the vast gardens. the ones that you help tend to. the ones that find solace in. you direct your attention back to lord kita, a hopeful smile plastered across your face. “perhaps we can start now?”

now it’s his turn to laugh, hearty and full of joy, tenderly pulling you by the hand he’s grasping away from the estate. “perhaps we can.”

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu #haikyu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #kita x reader #shinsuke kita x reader #shinsuke kita #kita fluff #kita shinsuke #kita x you

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nifreti-ii · 1 month

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My silly “little” OC Eike! (this is gonna be a long one, buckle in)(Also yandere related content)

Eike is the youngest of three children and the shortest in his family (hilarious isn't it), which is a slight sore spot for him. He was raised by both his parents and two older brothers. Eike started being homeschooled when he was 11 after a bullying incident in middle school that left him hurt (ref scars on his face) and the school did nothing to stop it. Due to spending a large portion of his adolescence (and subsequent MAJOR growth spurt) at home, he constantly hits his head on door frames at most places. Despite his height, he’s just a big ‘ol puppy. He loves going to college and being able to make proper friends, just smiling constantly and excitedly talking to people. When he first meets Gavin, he genuinely finds his (awful) jokes hilarious and proclaims him to be his best friend (Gavin gave up trying to flirt with him). Perfectly remembers the first time he met Harper and had a “waaaaaait a minute” when he met him again (greatly appreciates not having to break his neck to talk to someone).

(now on to his likes and dislikes) Love love LOVES bugs, but loves moths even more. The first time he saw a fluffy moth he said it looked just like him and cradled it in his hands till it flew away (he denies it to this day he cried when it left, don’t listen to his brothers). His entire family has a very close connection to nature, their home is a 5-minute drive to the closest road. It’s to the point that the inside and outside of the house are littered with plants (even the bathrooms man). He finds it the greatest honor when someone tells him a secret and takes keeping it VERY seriously, you can’t even torture it out of him. His mom gave him his first knife when he was 11 after what happened and made him promise to protect himself if someone tried hurting him (he now has 30 knives…). He grew up listening to folklore, cryptids, and myths; Knows all the signs of nearly any supernatural creature and habitually tells people “not to anger the spirits”.

He’s interestingly enough very private about his family life, no one who knows him has ever met any of his family or seen them (Only ever talks about anything they’ve done to him/for him.) …Spoons… So. Many. Spoons… (His brothers hid spoons in his room…his closet, his bed, and his bathroom, it was the one he found in his plant when repotting it months later that made him hate them.) Hunters used to hunt on his family’s property and constantly were a problem; It took one of his brothers getting hurt for the problem to be taken care of (he was too young to remember what happened, but does remember all the blood). The town tried to intimidate his family into giving up their land to build more homes, starting to cut down the trees right outside of the property. It was when one of the cut trees landed and destroyed some trees on their property did the town learned its lesson. The first and last time he went to the beach, a crab grabbed his toe and nearly snapped it off. He was 13, so his family just left him home whenever they went to the beach (His brothers tried scaring him with a crab shell, but he ended up liking it and now hangs it up on his wall.).

(referring to 5 min ship, not all tho) He would always steal his family's clothes and hug them whenever he had nightmares or missed them. It feels like he’s being hugged by said person (if he can’t wear it, he just wraps it around his head T^T). His family mostly showed love through actions, always hugging and gifting each other things (they say “I love you” at least twice a year). He tends to admire bugs and take pictures of them before letting them go. He either gives the meanest glare to whoever is bothering his love interest or physically intimidates them when they try to touch them. He’s only been in 2 relationships, each lasting over a year and both ended because he was too possessive (He’s better at his jealousy now but will be in a foul mood for a few minutes… or hours, really depends)

Was this long? Yes. Did I space out halfway through it and just realize that? Also yes. I love my skrunkly little OCs and giving them fairly fleshed-out backgrounds. I wanted to add that Eike is a decadent of Dryads/Nymphs along with his father and brothers, his mother being a witch. I know that supernatural creatures are canon in-universe, I just hope I'm not stretching tooo much T-T. The leaves in Eike’s hair are PART of him and hurt when pulled on, kind of like pulling out a weed or carrot (they grow back) I love his little ears and slightly greenish skin :3 Im gonna crawl under a rock (for now). Harper and Camp willow peak belong to @campwillowpeak (the silli knows too much but likes to pretend he doesn't :>)

Check out my Masterlist for my art and (limited) writing! :D

#digital art #yandere #my art #digital drawing #art #fanart #digital fanart #my fanart #camp willowpeak fanart #camp willowpeak harper #camp willowpeak #campwillowpeakvn #yandere vn #I have more to say but im too tired #May or may not add more #campwillowpeak #cwp #oc

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animeworldfanfics · 5 months

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I am sorry...

"I hate you!" "Of Course you don't. You never can, can you?" "Yes! Yes, I most definitely can!"

And then his eyes softened...He immediately regretted ever having said that to me. Giyuu Tomioka knew what I was afraid of. He knew my insecurities better than I did, any, maybe I was the biggest idiot in the world, but I always felt relieved when the ones I loved always answered NO to the above mentioned question.

It was a super silly, deep rooted insecurity. That I was someone people could only hate.

I don't know why, but I had never had friend growing up. Anyone I was friends with for more than 1 year automatically broke it off with me the next year. I guess I was too rude... There was also the fact that my importance in other people's lives slowly reduced. And I was never able to adapt to the change. Deep down, I knew that that's just how people are. Fickle, and easily changeable.

However, it slowly gnawed at my confidence, as I plummeted into the inescapable whirlpool of insecurities. It was all me.

The reason I had no permanent friends was my fault.

The reason people left me was because I was boring.

Giyuu Tomioka was my 16th friend, in 16 years of my life. We were classmates. He was the shy, quiet kid when we first met. I thought of him as an eccentric.

That was until he beat the amazing genius aka me by scoring more marks than me. From that points onwards, I made it a mission to know more about me. As I slowly started inching closer to him, there was very little I got to know about him. He always wanted to do better than all of his friends, because, he just hated being second to anyone else. But also because, even a teenager, he was super idealistic.

He wanted power enough to change the world.

On my part, I got carried away for another year, and I mentioned all of my insecurities, my fears, my lack of friends.....I cried more often around him than I did behind closed doors.

And slowly, he became my safe space.

He was always there to listen. And to openly curse everyone who made me sad. He was always THERE! He did not laugh at me when I was being super childish. He looked at me as if I was someone really precious to him. And slowly, he started opening up too.

Though it was not quite as much as I was, it was honestly, enough.

I had a feelings that our friendship was going to last.

Until...I fell for him...

Before I knew it, less than one year into our friendship and I had fallen for the one I called my best friend?! Why?! How?! This was outrageous, it was not possible.

But, I did not want to stay away from him. So I allowed the feelings to suffocate me.

I dreamt every night of our impossible future together. And everyday, I woke up and acted normal around him.

It was okay with me. I had always known nothing could happen between us.

So, why did it pierce me like a hundred thousand poison needles digging into my heart when he told me that he wanted me to help prepare a surprise for his.....crush? He wanted to propose to her. He wanted her as his girlfriend before someone else could take her from HIM!

And I promised yes...

I helped him design the room, decorate it beautifully. We made cards for her, and arranged a bouquet of 14 roses. He was going to go down on 1 knee for her.

He was ARROGANT! He would never go to the extremes even for me.... Tears stung at the corner of my eyes, as the moment of his confession to her neared. I could not hold it any longer.

The anger, the pain, the hurt....Everything accumulating inside me burst open, as in my anger, I lost control of my physical self.

I broke everything we had arranged.

I destroyed all his hard work in 10 seconds, like it meant nothing to me. And weeping, I made my way to the rooftop, to cry my eyes out.

30 mins later, he came up there. He was fuming. More than I had ever seen him fuming before. I guess...I really had hurt his feelings.

That episode of my temper led to a confrontation between us, where he spart out those terrifying words...

And in response, I had also shouted back, "Well I cannot! I can never hate you! You know why? Cuz I love you! I just....love you." Before him, I burst into another round of tears. I could tell he was shaken.

My confession had taken him by shock.

However, he was Giyuu Tomioka. He was my best friend. So he put his arms around me, and hugged me to him tight. He let me cry my eyes out. I bawled in his chest. This was probably the last time I would get to do anything like this. His girlfriend probably won't let his best friend any close to him now...

And so, I cried and cried for a whole lot of 30 mins, while he just held me patiently and listened.

Once my mind was completely cleared out, I looked at him with guilt + tears filled eyes as I said, "I am sorry...."

But he just smiled. He smiled his most loving, endearing smile, as he said, "I am sorry..."

~The End ~

#demon slayer #giyuu tomioka #giyuu x reader #kny giyuu #kimetsu giyuu #angst #unrequited love #sad ending #best friend giyuu #hurt #heather

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rw47vr-key · 1 year

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You'll be alright

◆ Characters : Jake x Fem! MC + another character ◆ Summary: a very short imagination snippet,kinda related to episode 10 ◆ Warning: hurt, language etc(Im so sorry, someone's lazy to proof read) (A/N at the end)

"What?do you have a death wish?? Please trust me. Go back to your home!I'm going inside the mine and that's settled. Hurry up!.

"...Remember , I'm doing this only for you and Hannah's safety! ", a tired voice yelled at the other side of the call and hang up without even waiting for a reply.

"Wait! It's not only about the TWO of us!! Dammit Jake! ", MC cursed, almost throwing her phone out of anger and frustration. Anger and frustration that was born in her heart, that was broken and broken repeatedly because of the different harsh realities this guy has put her to struggle in.Despite being aware of it, she kept failing in controlling her heart from loving him.

" Should I even trust him in this? " "One Or other way I am always tangled up with him in my life,does he even know who I really am? Or is he pretending not to know? ", so many thoughts and imaginations flooded her head, she sighed , burying her face in her hands.

She looked at her watch hopelessly,there was only 30 min until jake would reach the mine. She calmed herself down and started her car towards the duskwood forest.

After travelling for what felt like hours, she hopped out of the car and opened the back door.It was so dark around her and she tried her best to not make any evident sound.

"I warned you not to come here", Jake murmered coldly right behind her ear. Surprised by the sudden voice, she screamed a bit louder , for which he hushed and placed his hands on her mouth, assuring her that it was only him, the hacker.

She huffed in relief ,tears ready to fall but then she could see his eyes widen in surprise, as if he saw a familiar figure before him. He blinked a few times,wondering if it was a hallucination.Though it was dark, the warmth and presence was so familiar that he can't understand whether it was real. "No it is her, definitely her, the MC I loved 4 years ago", he thought , slowly taking off his hands from her. She could see him trembling in realisation and he called out her in nickname that he used to call, and she nodded wiping her tears. "Too late in finding out me, Jake.You know, I was very upset that you didn't realise it was my new number, my voice,even though I recognised you right away! And hah! you call yourself a hacker".

He interrupted in a rather pleading voice"No ,no..its not what you think. I only looked for the name of the phone number that hannah sent.I didn't go through much of your personal data. I just ...thought the name was a coincidence.I..."

" you left me alone without a proper goodbye like in those damn old movies", she screamed, which woke up the sleeping baby in the back seat of the car. The baby started crying immediately, she picked him/her up, weeping along with him/her.

Jake gave her a doubtful gaze ,and then looked at the tiny being whose fluffy hair and little nose resembled him ,he realised what the beautiful truth and the life ahead of him he missed and how much of a jerk boyfriend he was to her."I...didn't know. I am..I am sorry. In the end,I was the same as my...", he cried inaudibly and fell on his knees before her. She quickly rushed to hug him before he could say that word. "No! I know why you left. It's not entirely your fault. Please! , I didn't come here for that! Let's leave it to the police! I'm begging you! I am afraid you will leave me and our baby alone! I don't want that! ", all those lonely days' sorrow ached in her heart, she cried on his shoulders,as he pulled her closer and hummed , " I already saved her", and when she became silent after hearing that, he kissed her forehead and also the baby,and continued "And you saved me. I promise I won't leave you again. ", and with that said, he fainted leaning on her.

He was not injured outside anywhere, but the wounds deep inside him were only there, and she could feel it as she gazed at his strong yet fragile body. She whispered as if reciting a wishful prayer,"Don't worry, jake, I promise to take away all your pain".

"Officer! someone's here! Oh there are two, no three of them!Hey! Are you alright, miss? ", A paramedic hurried with a torch in his hand.

She carressed Jake's cheek not taking his eyes off him, and responded with a soft smile "yeah we will be alright. "

A/N: Hii lovelies 💙 yepp,It's been a longg time(also I wrote this on a whim haha).I apologize if there is any mistakes. I know this was unrealistic but if you've read this until the end, thank you😅😭❤Take care! ily!🌸💕

#duskwood #duskwood jake x player #duskwood jake #duskwood MC #I may delete it too jskhgsjjh #duskwood fandom #duskwood everbyte #duskwood fanfiction #iamjake #duskwood episode 10 #writings☆

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justkenz · 1 year

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I'm pretty sure I suffer from undiagnosed ADHD, and now with my finals coming up, I feel like I'm totally going to fail every single exam, and ruin my future. Just now while writing homework for a subject I'm deathly afraid of, I cried 4 times because I can't get myself to focus. I'm very panic-y, and in situations like this, it feels like my whole world is falling apart. I'm suffering, but when I ask for help, I'm told that I can only help myself. I don't know what to do or where to start. My HS-ending exams start in May. I don't have much time left.

Ugh, I am so sorry you are going through this! Let me be clear, yes there are things that you can do to help yourself, but you need someone to help you figure out what tools best suit your needs in order for you to be able to use the tools, does that make sense lol?

What I mean is yes there are things you can try on your own, research, etc, you can do to find things and tips for how to help in these situations, but it's also okay to ask for help! I never would have known about some of the tips or tricks, or resources, that can be available if I hadn't asked someone at the time.

In my opinion, everyone learns differently, and what might help one person might not help someone else, but here are a few things you could try when it comes to studying/doing homework:

Research tips and tricks that people with adhd use for studying, there is so much info on Instagram and tiktok !

Work in shorter time frames like 30 mins then a 10 min break, or an hour then a 15 min or 20 min break, find an interval that works for you. During your break, get up from your workstation, move your body, have a snack, reward your brain with something you like, etc, don't stay seated at your desk (if you can)

Use a notebook or a sticky notepad to write down thoughts that might come up during your studying, that way you address them, write them down and then save them for later. It's basically just so you can try and dump the not needed thoughts during the time you need to focus

Listen to instrumental or classical music (unless your brain can handle lyrics while studying), I know it might sound funny but this is something that I live by lol I don't know why but it helps my brain focus.

Be gentle with yourself, you are doing your best, and I can tell you are working really hard, so just be kind to yourself okay🤍

I know it can feel overwhelming and lonely, but I promise you are not alone and you got this! I'm cheering you on, and I hope all of your finals go great!

#asks #adhd #undiagnosed adhd #adhd tips #adhd study tips #adhd life #advice #adhd advice

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soullikethesea · 1 year

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Woah. T was super intense today.

I chose to have a phone call in the hopes that it would be less intense and overwhelming. It wasn’t, really. But it did save me a bunch of commuting, so that was quite nice. T called from her home, which she is renovating... that wasn’t ideal. I could hear some workers - she tried to reassure me that they don’t speak our language, but alas. At some point she moved to a more quiet place and that was better. We talked a bit about my week, T tried to give me a more physical ‘anchor’ to orient me rather than focusing on routines. (Didn’t work, probably because it’s triggering some things for me). Then I said I’d been feeling super anxious and T asked me to draw it, but I felt a huge block towards that. I said I could probably set it up with some figures instead. I got out the baby leopard figure and T asked what it represented. The pain/fear from when I was around two years old. I feel super disconnected from it again as I am writing this, but I was totally in it at that moment. I can barely remember what we talked about exactly, but T said some reassuring things about how it wasn’t my fault. She also tried to do rescripting, where we’d sort of change the scenario. She offered some sort of fairy scenario, but I opted for imagining that my mum went inpatient with me in a mother-child facility. That actually eased some of the fear/pain inside, because I really believe something like that would have helped. Then T tried asking for more ways to help the part, but I got tangled up inside. I was overcome by these waves of negative thoughts. It was super bad. I was very very dissociated and dizzy. T tried to redirect me away from the part. Then at some point she asked about what it felt like, if I see myself like a little matroesjka doll that has one of its’ layers hurting. I said that what it feels like is really emotional to say and I cried a bunch. It feels like I really fell apart back then, as a toddler. Like I got broken into pieces and the pain is really spread out and disorienting because of that. I cried a bunch more when I remembered some of the missing and confusion. When my mum split up with my dad she initially broke off all contact, which made me lose touch with my siblings (with whom I’d been very bonded). As a two-year old, stuff like that is obviously really really hard to make sense of. I also remember a bit of how scared I was continually that my mum would just leave me. You know, with others. Like she left me with my dad when I was a little bit older and saw him as a total stranger. I thought that any day could be the day that she decided she couldn’t care for me any longer and would just sneak off. Very, very insecure and sad little toddler. :( Also, we talked a bit about how T felt like I was so quiet because the part wanted to sort of hide away and then when I focused on the part it was like she ran away. So, probably accurate. At the end, T tried to end the conversation, but I was still super dysregulated. Far away, dizzy, numb, heavy, without words. I tried to ask for help a few times and it was like she couldn’t hear me or something. I probably say all the wrong things. But then I said I still feel “red” and she finally understood and asked if I wanted to try something... She asked me to hold the little leopard. It helped a bit, but then the negative thoughts-part came back again really strongly. It was something I could observe without getting sucked in, so it was OK. She said I could promise to talk about that part next time and I said I didn’t want to promise something I wasn’t sure I would be able to do. But I’m really glad she took the time to talk me down a bit more and I felt OK enough when I got off the phone. (We did go like 30 min over time, though!) Oof. This was a heavy one.

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fartquen12 · 1 year

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THE QUARRY Gamer!Poop!Nick x Real! Nopoop!Fem! Reader

Trigger warnings: unhealthy realationships..., nick beinf a yandere, poop,dookie,y/n being normal(yes this was really hard for me.., gaymers.(nominikylesallowed nominiravisallowed)

THE GAMER CHAIR...

It was 5:50 pm and you were at camp. It was the last week of camp infact. You wanted to do something special with your boyfriend so you decided to go swimming with him, you ran into his room! “Nick!!!!! Can we pleaseeeee go swimming?” you said as you looked at him with puppy eyes. “yeah sure whatever.” the aussie said. you could tell he wasnt really paying attention..BUT he said yes so you ran to the pool house and got towels. you found your bathing suit and his. When you walked back in he wasnt on his bed and instead he was on the xbox. you frowned as you saw him comfortably sitting on his red and green neon gaming chair controller in hand playing doors on roblox. He was on door 32 in some long ass hallway. “babe-”

“SHUTUP!!”

You flinched when he yelled because he was never mad. You didnt understand this. As you peeked at the screen you saw him running with intense music. since you thought this was stupid and he promised to go with you... you clicked the shining white xbox logo button. He dropped the controller and stared at you with dark angry pupils. what you never understood was the fact that it was only after some strange animal in the woods attacked him that he started being mean and playing roblox. You thought it was a coping mechanisim. Your thoughts were interupted when he grabbed your wrist harshly and screamed in your face.

“FUCK YOU WHORE GET OUT NOW BEFORE I TURN INTO DOORS SCREECH!!!”

He yelled as he hit your arm. You cried and ran as fast as you could out of there.

*20 mins later*

you were sitting in the halls when you felt a tap on your shoulder when you glanced over you saw your sad looking boyfriend. You frowned at the sight of him.

“I’m sorry. Im so sorry okay? I didnt mean to I dont know wha- please just come play doors with me.”

“no” you argued

“then just watch.. i just want to be around you again.”

While thinking of your next move you saw how sad he was. so you nodded our head and he brought you to his room and sat you down on his bed as he skipped over to his gaming chair. you petted his cat “cupcake” as you stared at his window. His cat showed loads of affection towards you even more than she showed nick which always made you giggle. You stopped petting the cat when you saw nick die and go back to the lobby. he stood up and walked over to the corner of the room and stood over a litter box.

“nick? What are you doin-”

he pulled out his pp and started pissing!!!

“AHHH DUDE WTF STOP THAT SHIT!!!” You yelled as you slapped your hands over your eyes. shortly after he stopped peeing and pulled up his pants sitting back down in his gaming chair. “NICK WTF MAN WHYD YOU DO THAT!” you yelled. “WHAT??? I didnt wanna go to the bathroom and leave my game.” He said. “dude. theres something seriously wrong with you.” you hesitantly said to him. he ignored you and kept playing. you tried to calm down and just enjoy the purring kitty sleeping with you.

*30 minutes later* you were on your phone and nick was STILL on that game. you heard him start grunting you glanced over and assumed he was mad at the game. You kept watching youtube videos about tickle tipson. You pasued your video when you heard louder grunting. you watched him closely when all of the sudden the grunting.. stopped. thats when you saw something brown dripping down his leg and a stinky smell. “Nick... dude. did you just poop your pants.”

“mhm didn’ wann’ get up.” he said casually. You screeched a loud screech and ran out and down the halls when you fell into dylan. “Y/n? Whats wrong!?” he said with a concerned tone. You went from scared to burting out into laughter “What?” dylan said while smiling “DUDE DYLAN. NICK SHIT HIS PANTS AND HE PISSED IN THE CATS LITTER BOX BECAUSE HE DINT WANT TO GET UP FROM ROBLOX DOORS!” YOu said dying from laughter.”WHAT SERIOUSLY!” dylan said.

You nodded and dylan ran to the room and started screaming at nick to wash his poopy butt. After 30 minutes of yelling he finally head to the shower. you took his clothes for him and started putting away old laundry in your room. THAT IS WHEN> AND I AM NOT SHITTING YOU THE GUY ON THE RINGE SPORTS TV CHANNEL WAS SAYING SOMETHING ABOUT ”letting it rip...”

you shut that shit off faster than you shut your moms coffin.

moral of the story. Do not let your boyfriend play roblox doors.

#the quarry #nick x reader #nick the quarry #nominiravisallowed #nominikylesallowed #fanfics #billy hargove imagine

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strbry-kat · 2 years

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today 09.05.22

today, it really sucked. I was crying for a good chunk of my day because I could not fathom the loss of you. I tried so hard to get through the day, I watched Haikyuu because it was the show that raised me six, seven years ago before you ever came into my life. I was petty today and I added you to the email list for my school's music program fundraiser. In less than 20 mins, you donated $20, texted me you did, and wished me the best season, and it was the first real interaction we've had in 3 days.

I didn't text you back for hours. I watched videos on how to deal with a breakup and decided to film my progress so my future self can look back on me and be proud of myself and where I came from. I hate that I hoped one day you could watch with me and hold me while you saw how much pain I suffered in your absence. I made a 30-minute video voicing everything I wanted to say to you but couldn't.

I cried some more. I took a nap. I woke up scared and anxious and missed you.

And the day before I had added one of your family friends who I thought would be understanding of us and me onto my CF while I cried about you making the playlist for the other girl. I'm pretty sure they told you because you blocked me on Spotify (it's fine, it's better for me anyways) and posted your text on there asking for friends to tell me not to text you because it wasn't worth the pain knowing you still supported me yet could still mess with another girl. I'm guessing the mutual had told you because you texted again asking why I'm not even going to say thank you because you thought we were "cool."

I never thought you could be less understanding of me. I never thought you could ever be so mean and hostile. I apologized, and I gave in and texted you. I explained that I was trying to process everything and waiting to reply because I was scared that texting you would be bad for our happiness and health and progress. I hate that after everything, I was still considerate to you and apologetic while you kept being so distant and hostile.

You told me that you didn't mean to donate either because the moment you saw the link you just went for it because it was a force of habit because you're used to doing things for me. I agreed. I wished you well, thanked you more times while you said that it was fucked I didn't say thank you. I assured you that it was just a misunderstanding. I left out the part where I was crying all day. I left out the part where I was mourning your loss. I left out the part where I was jealous of the other girl and thought about ways that you could have touched her and she could have touched you the same way I yearned to touch you.

You fed into my false hope today. The last thing you said to me, at 5.55 pm, was "I wanted to do one more thing for her." I had deleted our chat so I don't know what you meant by her. You didn't clarify either. I assumed you meant by me. One more thing for her. Not one last thing, one more thing.

I laughed about it and ranted about it to my friends. We agreed that you were being mean and rude demanding for us to be 'cool' when you know that you going to another girl less than 3 days after our breakup would sit right with me. I laughed at the fact that even after 2 years, you couldn't tell when I would be hurting. I laughed at the fact that you genuinely thought I would be emotionally stable and capable of texting you back and sacrificing what happiness I could give myself during this process. I laughed at the fact that you sounded so pitiful and hostile and asked for a simple thank you after breaking my heart and my soul and taking me with you and hurting me when you promised that you would never.

I accepted the fact that the same person that I fell in love with two years ago, continued to fall into love with every single day until our breakup, had trusted, believed, and saw as a safe space, would have ever hurt me on this level. Have ever betrayed me like this. The same person who gifted me the promise ring less than a year ago, promising to love me forever and protect me, never hurt me, and be by my side through every single thing, would hurt me like this. The same person who the day we broke up, asked me to still wear the ring so that one day, you could still fulfill the promise. But you could still think about me but ask another girl out and make a playlist with the same songs we used to share, which you would dedicate to me, less than a week into our breakup. The person you were a month ago, the person you were half a year ago, the lover I held so preciously a year ago and this May, would not have hurt me like you now. The lover that stared into my eyes and promised you would never leave two days prior, said i miss you, angel the very night before, would not have done this to me.

You are unrecognizable. And I'm glad that in your bliss and happiness, as you said you have found, you have truly exposed what a truly horrible person you are.

You made today ironically easier. It's still a lot, I'm still hurt. I'm still scared that she gets to touch you in places I will never get to worship you in again. I'm scared she's going to be able to kiss all of that beautiful face and body that I adore to this day, this very breath. I'm scared she's going to take you away from me and I'm scared that you've abandoned me for good. Yes, this hurts, and I want to call you still and ask why. why do this to the girl you claimed to love? what happened between us and what did I do to deserve this?

Rest assured, my dear, no matter what I did, every single little thing I did wrong, or even the big things I did wrong, I do not deserve this. For the rest of the day, I didn't cry. I ranted to my friends and family who wholeheartedly agreed. I will talk to my piano teacher tomorrow. You added me back to your close friends. I think you posted a sneak peek of a HOCO poster you made for her. I didn't cry, I was hurt, sure, but I'm almost to terms with it. Only the ugly greenness of jealousy flashed. But that's okay, I only yearn for what could have been and the missing of your tenderness that isn't mine anymore.

I called my friends, and I laughed the whole time, even if I was thinking or talking about you, it wasn't that I missed you too much or that I couldn't do this without you. I talked about in ways how I can show that you didn't break me down. They gave it to me straight, really. Your tactic of guilt tripping me, putting me on the CF, and asking for a thank you, was all to get my attention and taunt me. I agree. They told me to block or at least unfollow you. I haven't, I'm still waiting. They told me that I don't deserve this, that you were likely already just waiting for the opportunity and you took it. I agree (one of them called you a cheater and I want to agree so bad). I listened to music with the boys the whole night. I felt good. I felt okay.

I don't know how I will take it tomorrow. It's been a solid week. I don't know what dreams I will dream of you tonight, because my soul still yearns for yours. But I know that I never deserve this. The same person who claimed to love me would have never hurt me like you did this past week. I allow myself to hurt and be sad, but I allow myself to acknowledge everything I acknowledged today.

Truthfully, I think about the day that you come back. I think about how everything you are doing right now is because the new girl just can't compare, and as someone on Reddit said, is simply just because you couldn't handle the loneliness or maybe you were just uncommitted or scared of it. That's okay, one day we'll find out. We'll have a talk.

I still laugh at the fact that you're probably realizing that you're being mean and stupid and cruel. I'm smiling right now, at this very moment, about how you're likely thinking of me, no matter what. Because as much as you said you are focusing on yourself now with us not in a relationship anymore, promised that you love me still, just wasn't mentally in the relationship, I know you just as well. I know that at one point, those songs did mean something and they still do mean something to us and you. At one point, you did love and care for unconditionally and you meant every promise you made.

But not now. And that's okay, it's just something I have to come to terms with because you couldn't commit to them. I mean a lot more to you than how you are treating me right now.

So, if you do come back, I don't know. You've betrayed me and lost my trust beyond what you can do now. I still hold love and care for you, that's why I haven't unfollowed you or blocked you yet (and recklessly, it's so you can reach out and apologize and come back to my arms) but that blinding trust is gone. If you come back, you have to prove to me, that you will keep your promises this time, that you will love me like no one else will compare, that you can only commit to me. Maybe, one day, when you come back and ask if we can try again, I won't give you the chance. Maybe, one day, when you come back, I will believe you and you get to fulfill your promises.

I saw a tiktok who said to do affirmations so:

I always get what I want. I attract peace and love and happiness in my life and environment.

Today, I am proud of myself. Today, I am progressing and learning. Today, I am accepting.

verzache - losing feelings.

#break up #lesbian heartbreak #heartache #encourageothers #diary entry #diary blog #writers #words #better days

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hospitalterrorizer · 19 days

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diary240

5/14-15/2024

tuesday - wednesday

feel super horrible after my super long shift.

or at least it felt super long, 7.5 hours, basically there for 8 hours (30 minute break), 9 hours of my day missing (half an hour to and from work roughly (maybe more like 25-20 mins? idk. a lot of time to lose though).

anyway, i am too tired to sort through my pictures today but i am going to be less tired tomorrow. i promise i think. anyway, beyond that:

i am now reading the impossible (bataille), there is one quotation i would like to get down now:

"in spite of my concern with being truthful, i can't say more about this. i write the way a child cries: a child slowly relinquishes the reasons he has for being in tears".

i find this very true, in myself, maybe others. it feels like something we can never give up on really. the book is quite good, i read some of it a while ago, i didn't feel it then, i think more to do w/ bataille burn-out more than anything else. a lack of variety can make me turn off of certain things.

an exciting thing in books, and something to waste some money on, is dennis cooper has a new book of shorts coming out. so i need to preorder that and get some other stuff from amphetamine sulphate.

beyondddd thatttt, hummm.

i did watch a movie today, just now, hard to parse all of my thoughts, it's called bye bye love. it's a queer movie from japan, from 1974. it features a transfemme lead which is fun, she is very pretty and i do think the movie is oddly empathetic and observant of dysphoria and the drive to look 'good' as a kind of thing one does not just for oneself but to attenuate, approach the limit of the possible, to push the barriers, to imagine, i guess, that one is not what one was told. by the end of the movie she proclaims, she is not a man or a woman. i feel that, frequently.

the movie also, i think, seems to make note of her moves towards an androgyny, the kind of life she begins to lead in the movie, and that by becoming an outlaw, she must hide, return to "being a man" in some respect, taking on the shape of her now-dead lover. which is tragic and pretty.

there are caveats to this, that i must think on though. the movie is certainly sexist, in all directions, perhaps though this is a critique that falls apart in the charm of the male lead's performance but it seems to be, by his macho-ness, a kind of ideal. though it can't be discounted totally, what he is. there are positives, i like when he claims he is nothing, and him wanting to be so dirty is an interesting issue in the thread of the sexism. that drive and then the degradation of women, i mean, they could be not the same, it is almost by that conflation, the degradation he expresses is cheapened. the perfect icon to absorb the focus.

the end also, i am not sure, there is almost this sense the movie gives me of siding with the male lead on the issues of gender, he asks, why aren't you a woman, why don't you become a man, why do you do your makeup. she is able to respond, and her responses are left alone fairly i suppose until the end upsets things, though what choice is there, in the face of annihilation by pigs. i suppose, better to keep living, is the only message there unless i look too much, but i want to look too much, but also:

i need to sleep now, so

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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minniespage · 1 year

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icky ૮꒰⑅ ˊ ᵔ ˋ ⑅ ꒱ა

“Papa I don’t feel good” Min, tears leaking from her eyes. “What’s the matter baby?” Papa inquired. “ Ma head hurts, my back, and ma eyes too” Min cries out. “I-I tired …. so tired” Tears run down their face, along with a runny red nose. “Aw baby come here and let me rub you down” Papa pulls out the Vicks, and starts to rub the teary-eyed child down. “ I told you to zip up your jacket didn’t I Min?” “Yes Papa you did” “ I know you were excited to go out today, but you need to have your jacket zipped because it’s cold outside, and you’re a sensitive bub okay?” “Yes Papa.” “ Good. Now let’s get some OJ in your system, and put you under the covers” “ Thank you Papa” “ Of course bun”

+ bonus

mins breathing was ragged and uneven as she slept fitfully. poor baby. she gets sick so easily. I should have zipped her jacket up… now look at her.

*gets a cool wash cloth and puts it on her increasingly warm forehead*

+ bonus x 2

min stirs for a bit "you're not mad at me?" “for..” “getting sick and now you have to take care of me. im sorry- I’ll get better quicker. promise!”

papa being so baffled and not being able to fathom how min would think they'd be mad for being sick when it's out of their control. “min darling…..

after her little speech, min coughs uncontrollably as if she used up the last of her energy apologizing.

papa hurriedly gets the glass of water from the side table and guides it to her gasping mouth.

after getting min situated papa continues “ baby it’s not your fault! you shouldn’t be sorry for getting sick. and you don’t have to be hurry to feel better- I’ve got you. don’t worry papas here.” ❤️‍🩹

‎︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⠀୨♡୧⠀︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶

໒꒰ྀི ◞‸◟ ꒱ྀིა yes soft hours are open!

꒰ 🫧‌ . . . ꒰ ♡ :

🥹

question of the day: do you get sick easily?

mins answer: yes i do! I went outside with my friend with maybe an open jacket and and skirt with no stockings and it was 30 degrees and I was like I’m fineeeee- red nose, red hands, and I’m fine •five seconds later• immmmm coldddssss i wannnt too go home🥹🧍🏻‍♀️

‎︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⠀୨♡୧⠀︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶

now playing ❪ ៸៸ ✰ ❫. ━━ Style by Taylor Swift

૮₍ ˃ ⤙ ˂ ₎ა ˚ ༘♡ ·˚꒰ im sleepy z ᶻ ᶻ ᶻ꒱ ₊˚ˑ༄

i really am- i was too excited yesterday idunno why- dancing up and down and screaming- and now im so tired ahh my poor body - this is why I banned myself from the gym I don’t when to stop :(

if you saw me fall on my story no you didn’t 🫵🏻📸📸📸🧍🏻‍♀️

reminder :

I’m so glad you all are alive , here , and healthy ! Thank you for making this world a brighter place ! don’t give up ! You’re needed here ! Always! 🤍🌱

‎︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⠀୨♡୧⠀︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶

my partners in crime!:

‎︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⠀୨♡୧⠀︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶

tags ✰.ᐟ nuuu peeking ꒰ᐢ ›̥̥̥ ๑ ‹̥̥̥ ᐢ꒱

#agere blog #agere community #age regressor #little space #cute #sfw little one #agere #sfwlittleone #sfw agere

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sopebubbles · 3 years

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Summary: after Min Yoongi broke her heart and ended their engagement during senior year of college, Jeon Yn made a pact with her best friend Kim Seokjin that they would get married if they were still single at 30. At the end of their twenties, will they keep the promise?

Genres: social media au, s2l, bff2l, idiots to lovers, humor (I hope), fluff, angst (a little)

Pairings: jhk × reader, ksj × reader, myg × oc, pjm × jjk

Warnings: profanity, sex

Status: completed

A/n: please reply or send asks (if you're 18+)!! I really love these characters and have lots of back stories for them so I'd love to chat! Please don't be a silent reader :) likes and reblogs are always appreciated!! ❤

"+" next to a chapter means there a little blurb/drabble at the end that's just a little bonus. Please feel free to send me asks requesting blurbs bc I think they'd be really fun to do with these characters!

✏ = written update

Taglist open [comment, ask or dm!]

💔 The Breakup ✏

💍 The Pact ✏

💍 character intros

💍 part 1 - happy birthday

💍 part 2 - once in college

💍 part 3 - emotionally?

💍 part 4 - up for grabs

💍 part 5 - pretend

💍 part 6 - let me die

💍 part 7 - internationally recognized

💍 part 8 - cover band

💍 part 9 - good talk +

💍 part 10 - domestic

💍 part 11 - 12 cheese puffs +

💍 part 12 - rough night ✏

💍 part 13 - just wonderful

💍 part 14 - Seokjin shaped things +

💍 part 15 - uwu a gentleman +

💍 part 16 - cried wolf

💍 part 17 - angry guk +

💍 part 18 - oppa kink

💍 part 19 - fucking weirdo ✏🔞

💍 part 20 - big dumb idiots

💍 part 21 - hello traitor

💍 part 22 - double date

💍 part 23 - my ring

💍 part 24 - lose her ✏

💍 part 25 - but also. damn.

💍 part 26 - haha nope

💍 part 27 - this family is soft

💍 part 28 - I'll survive

💍 part 29 - I LOVE YOU (end)

Bonus drabbles:

✨ Always my baby boy ✏

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zukisbabe · 3 years

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Headboard

Shoto Todoroki x Fem reader [NSFW]

Warnings: 18+ content, smut, aged up au, and a bit of cursing.

Author’s note: Please for the love of God, MINORS DON’T INTERACT. This is also unedited and I wasn’t sure on how to end this lmao

“Baby you feel so good. Keep going just like that,” Groaned Shoto. His hand gripping tightly to [Y/N]’s hips. The hair stuck onto his forehead and his hips thrust up to meet with hers.

[Y/N] complained about never being able to be top, usually, it’s Shoto. For once she wanted to dominate him but is failing miserably.

“No come on baby, keep on going,” whined Shoto. [Y/N] began to slow down, she’s been riding him for 30 mins. She didn’t understand how he is able to be top for such a long time. At first, Shoto was opposed to the idea because all he cares about is making her feel good, but now he was enjoying himself. He was able to get a great view of her tits bouncing up and down. He loved how he was able to thrust himself deeper inside her, place his hands wherever he pleased such as caressing her tits, cupping her face, or on her hips as he helped her ride him.

All she wanted was to orgasm once as a top but Shoto insisted on continuing. The only person she can blame is herself because she complained.

“I’m trying but I already came once and I’m still sensitive Shoto,” cried [Y/N]. Her hips slowly moved back and forth as Shoto pinched her nipples causing her to moan out loud.

“I know but I want you to come once more. I’m so close just a little more I promise.”

Shoto began to notice she was too worn out and that her movements couldn’t keep up with the speed he had wanted. He felt bad but he wanted to stay in this position. Then he gripped onto her hips tighter and stopped her from moving. [Y/N] looked down at him confused.

“Grab the headboard [Y/N].”

Following his orders [Y/N] reached out her arms onto the wooded frame of the bed. The second she had grasped onto the board, Shoto hoisted her up into the air and pounded into her repeatedly, his thrust hard and forceful. Her head fell back due to the feeling of Shoto’s tip hitting her g-spot every. single. time. The only sounds that are heard in the room are the sounds of skin slapping, [y/n]’s moans, Shoto’s groans, and the squeaks of the bed.

“Fuck [Y/N] you’re so tight,” “Shit, right there Shoto,” He moved his hand towards her front and rubbed her clit in fast, harsh circles. “Come on baby, come one more time for me.” [Y/N] moaned louder, her body spasmed as she reached her high.

Squeezing around him caused Shoto to grunt and continued to thrust into her at an inhuman speed, wanting to reach his own high.

“Fuck yes Shoto,” Cried out [Y/N]. With a few more thrusts, she felt Shoto’s cock throb, pulsate and unload his warm thick cum inside her. [Y/N] collapsed onto him as Shoto stayed insider her, both trying to catch their breaths.

Eventually, Shoto pulled out, they both laid next to each other, their sweaty bodies holding on to one another. He grabbed on the back of [Y/N] head and pulled her in for a forehead kiss and held onto her tightly.

#shoto x reader #shoto smut #shoto todoroki x reader #shoto #todoroki x reader #todoroki x y/n #shoto todoroki #mha x reader #mha smut #mha shouto x reader #mha shoto #Smut #bnha smut #bnha x reader

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bentobarnes · 3 years

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『𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞』

note : my requests are OPEN! Feel free to send me story requests

pairings : bucky barnes x reader

word count : 800

request by anon (thank you!) : I'm glad you all enjoyed little joy 1 so much): reader goes into labor and bucky encourages her during the process and the aftermath of the birth of their little joy

read the first part here

warnings : fluff

*feedback is appreciated. please reblog so it can reach more people♡

Two weeks before your due date for your little joy you and Bucky moved to his old apartment. Your house was too far from the hospital and Bucky didn’t want to take the risk of you going into labor when you are miles away from the hospital.

Every time you got Braxton hicks Bucky became more and more worried. He hated seeing you in pain even though these were only false contractions and he knew they are helping you prepare to deliver your little one but he was still nervous.

Your due date passed and you knew that this baby is going to be like his father. Stubborn to the bones not even wanting to leave the comfort of your body.

Your belly was huge which was normal for after your due date and everything became harder. You couldn’t take a few steps without stopping to take a breath.

After two days you were making your way to the kitchen. Your Braxton hicks were the worst today especially while walking. You had to stop on every step because the pain was ripping your bump.

As you were walking through the hall you felt warm water spilling down your things and a sudden pain making you whimper.

“Bucky!” You manage to shout with the loudest tone you could get. You leaned against the wall for support, your hands on the sides of your round belly.

Bucky came rushing through the hall. Panic was written on his features.

“Love, what’s wrong? Is it the baby?” He asked stressed, enveloping your arms with his palms.

“My water just broke. We need to go to the hospital but first grab the bag.” You tried to explain as calmly as possible but the truth was you were even more scared than Bucky.

He sprinted to grab the bag and came immediately lifting you bridal style and carrying you down the stairs. He gently placed you in the car and sped off to the hospital.

“You are doing great, baby. Just breathe, okay?” He was supporting you, holding your hand and giving it a little squeeze.

When you reached the hospital, he lifted you again and carried you inside.

“My wife is giving birth! Her waters broke!” He shouted at the nurses. You almost screamed at the next contraction and the nurses immediately got you to your room.

You were already with a 7 centimeters delay and before you could even realize when 30 mins have passed the doctor told you to push.

“You can do it, Y/N. Come on, baby.” Bucky was motivating you while you were quizzing his metal hand for dear life.

After a solid 1 and a half hour of pushing you were too exhausted to continue doing this.

“I can’t do this! I can’t.” You cried out when the doctor told you to push again.

“Hey listen to me, my love. You can make it. We have been through soo much together, you can do that, too and we can finally see our creation. Our little joy. Come on, baby push for me and the baby.” Bucky encouraged you and placed a soft kiss on your forehead.

After a few more pushes, a loud cry echoed through the room. You and Bucky were sobbing, too.

“You made it, love!” Bucky whispered overwhelmed by happiness.

“Congratulations! You have a lovely baby boy!” The doctor announced and you extended your hands to get him.

You held him against your chest and observed his feathers. He was a small copy of his father. He was perfect.

“Hey little one, I can’t believe you are finally here. I love you and your mother to the moon and back. I promise I will be a good father.” Bucky was stroking the chubby cheek of the baby, whispering tiny promises.

When the doctor took him to make sure everything is okay with him Bucky hugged you from the side careful not to cause you any pain.

“I’m soo proud of you, Y/N. You gave me all this.” He cupped your cheek and kissed you softly.

“I’m glad I got all this with you, Buck. You are my only one.” You sobbed. The emotions were running through your body.

When the doctor came he gave the baby to Bucky. He was talking with him like he could already speak back.

“My little Ed.” Bucky said softly before handing him to you so you could feed him.

After you fed him, Edward was soundly asleep in your embrace. You were exhausted and your eyelids started to get heavy.

“Love, I can take care of him. Take a rest. You did soo much today.” He told you with a low voice and took the baby.

Almost immediately you drifted off to sleep. This day was the happiest in your life along with the day you married Bucky and the day you found out you were pregnant.

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queenangst · 3 years

Note

Afo possesing deku instead of tomura for 30min prompt? Maybe being made to hurt his friends

for my 30 min fic challenge / read more: ‘30 min fics’ tag

drawing voices deep from you [read on AO3]

Deep within One for All, Izuku makes a mistake. All for One has a new body.

“So this is it?” Izuku said quietly.

He looked around at the cracked and strange place; tall, empty chairs sat in a semicircle, but Izuku was surrounded by seven figures.

One for All—Yoichi, Izuku remembered—smiled.

“You already have my Quirk.” He took Izuku’s hands and squeezed.

His heart hurt. Sometimes it was easy to think of the vestiges as just… ghosts, remnants of a different time. More than often though, as he held each of their Quirks, used them, he remembered they had been real people once living in a different time.

And all of them except one killed by All for One.

“Then…”

Izuku’s knees knocked together. “What happens next?”

Nana touched his shoulder. “You keep fighting. You keep going. With all of us behind you.”

If this space was One for All… this broken room, set in a whirling, endless void—why was it so small? Izuku turned, looking to where the walls crumbled and out into the open. What was the rest of it?

He’d thought about the questions before. But Izuku had thought privately to himself that maybe if he unlocked every Quirk, if he faced every truth, this room would disappear, and become something else.

“What’s… what’s out there?”

Yoichi hadn’t let go of his hand, and now gripped it tighter. “Don’t go.”

His curiosity ached.

“So you think there’s something.”

“If it is what I think it is,” Yoichi warned, “you should stay here.”

Izuku looked back. Faves echoed to him, each one silent.

“So you don’t know.”

Yoichi shook his head.

“Can… can I come back?”

Yoichi frowned, but gestured around him. “This is your Quirk.”

But something of it was still out of Izuku’s control. There was something he hadn’t grasped yet, an understanding that eluded him now. Izuku pulled himself free of Yoichi’s grasp, and he was let go this time without a fight.

“I’ll come back, then,” he promised.

Heart pounding in his chest, he walked to the edge where ground met nothing.

“Izuku,” someone called. It could have been one voice. It could have been many.

Izuku stepped out, down, and fell.

The sensation was weird. He was falling, but this wasn’t real, really, and the darkness surrounded him. It almost felt alive, cradling him in a weathered hand. Something pulsed in the heart of the darkness.

A light.

Izuku reached for it, flickering red and encompassing, and—

Toshinori searched the sky for Izuku.

The battle was dying. Izuku sank back to the ground, Blackwhip still dancing around him but faded now. From the edge, Toshinori could taste the power in the air. Like electricity.

He moved first, picking his way through rubble. Izuku landed hard, and suddenly reached up with a hand to grab his head.

“Young Midoriya!”

Izuku looked in Toshinori’s direction.

His eyes…

There was something strange about his eyes.

Toshinori picked up the pace, uncaring, running the short distance between them as Izuku jerked. A tremor ran through his shoulders.

He said, in a small voice, “All… All Might?”

Hawks landed and came over. “Something wrong?” He jerked his head in the other direction. “Endeavor’s got the villain. What’s up with the kid?”

“I—I don’t…” Izuku shook his head. One for All crackled to life around him, green light giving his skin an unnatural glow. “All Might, please—please help. Help. Help.”

Toshinori took Izuku’s face in his hands. “Tell me what’s wrong.”

Up close, his eyes were—they were changing colors. Black, from the inside out.

“I-” Izuku lapsed into silence. He shook, then cried out in pain. “I think I made a mistake, wait, please, don’t, I’m sorry —”

Then he went still and limp, like a puppet with all his strings cut. Toshinori caught him, looking towards Hawks.

“We need…”

“Medic!” Hawks called.

Toshinori shook Izuku gently. “Midoriya? Can you hear me?”

His eyes snapped open. Izuku blinked up at Toshinori—with completely black eyes—and suddenly, his mouth curved into a smile.

“All Might.”

Toshinori recoiled. That wasn’t Izuku’s voice. Those weren’t Izuku’s eyes.

“...Izuku?”

“What’s going on?”

Izuku laughed.

“Your face,” he said as he stood. “It’s good to be able to see again. And what a sight.”

He threw out his arms, flexing his fingers and marvelling. Glanced around the battlefield as if the destruction was uninteresting to him. Shadows gathered on his face.

“Ah…” He took a step. “Oh, Izuku,” he said. “Thank you for the opportunity. It’s been so long.”

Toshinori clenched his fists. “What have you done to Izuku?”

“What have I done?” A chuckle. “He’s the one who opened the door and came looking for me. Don’t you recognize me?”

“Let him go.”

All for One flicked his fingers. Blackwhip tore out of his arm violently, in a way that Toshinori hadn’t seen since the first time Izuku used it. There was no other explanation, no other person this could be, who stared with Izuku’s eyes at Toshinori holding so much hate.

“I don’t think I will,” All for One said.

It was Izuku’s voice, sort of. Toshinori still recognized it; but it was a little bit distant now, and warped, as if he was hearing the voice through a radio.

“After all, he’s just given me the key to freedom. He had All for One, too, a piece of it when I gave my brother his Quirk. Izuku just had to find it.”

Toshinori forced his hands to uncurl and held his hands out, mind racing. They couldn’t negotiate. They couldn’t fight. He cast a helpless glance in Hawks’ direction, whose feathers darted out but hovered.

All for One’s voice changed back, to Izuku’s. “You wouldn’t want to hurt your hero, would you?”

“Please,” Toshinori said.

A glance. “Will you beg for it?”

Toshinori knew that he wouldn’t let Izuku go even if he begged, but he dropped to his knees anyway. Concrete hit him. He looked up at Izuku—his successor, his legacy, his boy.

“Please.”

Fast, faster than Toshinori had time to comprehend, a scarred hand wrapped around Toshinori’s throat. Could he feel Toshinori’s heartbeat, pounding, alive?

“Pathetic,” All for One said. “The Symbol of Peace.”

That was Izuku’s hand. That was Izuku’s body, it was still him—Toshinori couldn’t fight, not even if this was his greatest enemy. So he knelt as the hand tightened. His lungs screamed.

“Please.”

All for One had never been satisfied. It was in his name, in his Quirk. What he wanted, he took; what he couldn’t have, he destroyed worlds and families and people to remake for himself.

But not—

Not Izuku. He couldn’t speak anymore. Please.

“He’s not gone, you know,” All for One said, leaning in.

“All Might!” Hawk’s voice, distant and fuzzy. Toshinori reached out a hand, trying to convey his message. Don’t hurt him. “All for One, let them both go.”

All for One leaned in. Izuku. His eyes flickered with green light. Out of the corner of Toshinori’s eye, he could see curls of hair.

He fought for air. The hand around his throat eased, just slightly, as if All for One knew.

“Izuku,” Toshinori rasped. “It’s… okay. It’s not, it’s not your fault. I forgive you.”

All for One drew back. A tear ran down his face, but All for One didn’t seem to be aware it was there.

“Izuku’s begging, too,” he whispered. “He’s calling your name, All Might.”

A sudden release. Toshinori gasped, his chest caving from inside-out, spots dancing in his vision. He fell back, concrete scraping his hands, and struggled to get up.

Hawks grabbed his shoulder, drew him to his feet—good, because Toshinori had no strength to stand.

“Izuku…” Toshinori begged. “Please come back.”

All for One smiled again. Toshinori suddenly had a memory of Izuku kneeling in front of him, Quirkless and sobbing as he held out a hand. They stood in the golden, dying light of day as Toshinori offered Izuku his Quirk.

Would this have happened if Izuku hadn’t taken it, or if Toshinori hadn’t offered it? Would he be safer?

But not happier. There was a smile Toshinori treasured, one that was twisted on his face now. But not better. All Might would have died if that day had passed with nothing, for all that Izuku had given him, and he couldn’t regret that.

“We’ll see,” All for One said. Then, having won the battle, he strode away. From the back, receding into the distance and the dust; and dressed in green with his cape fluttering, a familiar silhouette, Toshinori could hardly tell him apart from Izuku.

Taglist: If you’d like to be added or removed from this taglist (tagged when a new fic is posted), please let me know. If your blog is unmentionable, I cannot tag you.

@happi-tree @soyoudneverguess @granny-griffin @zannish @liarielle @ashemberss @gwogobo @honeyandsonshine @cinammon-cinner @paralumanleadmehome @ship-toast @gabs-2002 @the-reading-obsessed-stitchbear @weird-skittle @sapphire363 @fr0znmang0 @in-honor-of-you @cheese490 @anakinthetrashking @proheromidoriyashouto @lust-nd-love @firefletch @mamamiamia @frankiealexquin @crossroadofinterests @bornindundee @bleusmainpage @fleurie3am15inspo @scheherahzade

#bnha #bnha fanfic #my fanfic #30 min fics #izuku #all might #afo #idk if my taglist is working sorry #THIS FIC WAS A BLAST I FELT LIKE I WAS. IM ONTO SOMETHING

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