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coco-loco-nut · 2 days

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In Your Mind

Pairing: Carlos x Reader

Summary: The next couple years with the love of your life

requests open masterlist first part

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The Spanish sun kisses your skin as you lay out by the pool at the home Carlos rented in Majorca, his favorite holiday spot. His family is a short drive away, also vacationing here. Carlos wanted to have you all to himself for the week.

You look incredible, mi amor

Care to join me, Carlitos, instead of ogling me?

Hm, I think I prefer watching you

Despite his statement, he lies on the lounge chair beside you. You watch his toned muscles flex. The past couple of days have allowed the both of you to grow incredibly close and know each other very well.

"Hypocrite," he laughs, noticing your focus on him.

"I was simply admiring, you looked like you wanted to devour me," you get up and walk to the pool, feeling warm in the sun. You dive in and when you surface, pushing your hair back, Carlos swears he hasn't seen anything more sexy.

"Cariño, you need to stop doing that, you are driving me mad," he says a little breathlessly. You swim to the edge of the pool.

"You better take care of that, before we have dinner with your parents," your smirk causes Carlos to look down and groan. He stands up and pulls you out of the pull, carrying you to the daybed by the pool. You've never been happier about the privacy the villa offered than at that moment.

After a quick shower, you and Carlos join his family at the villa the rest of his family is staying at. You get along well with everyone, thankfully for you. While Carlos talks with his parents, you talk with his sisters, Blanca and Ana, and his cousin, Carlos.

“He really likes you, when he called us, he told us all about you, then he mentioned that he met football legend David Beckham,” Ana tells you, the both of you giggling.

“That’s how he met me, he came over to speak to my dad. He also made me promise to invite some of my uncles to the wedding, whenever that is,” you share.

“That sounds like him, are you sure you want to stay with him?” Blanca asks teasingly.

“Perhaps not. I do suppose he’s better than other fans, especially the ones who are even bigger fans of my mom, those guys tend to be weird. He understands what it’s like to have a famous parent, so I guess I can put up with him asking to meet someone my dad played with once a week,” you look at your soulmate fondly.

“You really love him, don’t you?” Carlos, the cousin, asks and you give him a weird look.

“Of course I do, he’s my soulmate. I’ve loved him for years, even if I didn’t know who he was,” you say as if it’s the most obvious thing ever.

“Not all soulmates like each other, but it is clear you two love one another,” Ana grabs your hand and squeezes it as you are called to the table. You sit beside Carlos, his hand resting on your thigh as you all enjoy the meal.

“I think it’s time we get going, someone is tired after all the sun today,” you tell his family a few hours later as you run your fingers through Carlos’s fluffy hair. He is visibly tired.

“Get back safely, I hope we see you again soon,” his mom hugs you, knowing Carlos will likely keep you to himself the rest of the week despite loving to be around his family.

“Thank you, especially for trusting me with your son,” you hug her back.

“Thank you for being a wonderful partner to him, I don’t think we could’ve asked for someone better,” she smiles as Carlos Sr walks over.

“Especially the daughter of a Los Blancos, especially one of the Galácticos,” Carlos Sr smiles.

“You and my dad will have to meet one day soon, I am sure he will love to talk football with you,” you smile politely, feeling the exhaustion settling in.

“Let’s get back to the villa, mi amor,” Carlos presses a kiss to the side of your head, bidding his family a goodnight.

The rest of the week is spent relaxing, cuddling, and learning each other. You decide that you want to travel with him when you aren’t working, and that includes the race he is going to straight from Spain.

Carlos is in a meeting at the track when you decide to send him a mental image of you in a bathtub. He takes a sip of water to hide his blush, trying to focus on the meeting and not the growing desire in his mind.

Ay! Cariño, I am in a meeting.

My bad, Carlitos, I didn’t realize. Well, now you have something to look forward to when you get back to the hotel.

You are just lucky I’m not driving right now. The meeting just ended, I’ll be there in 15.

“Lunch?” Charles asks Carlos, who is doing his best to hurry out of the room.

“Not today, I am going back to the hotel for lunch with Y/n,” Carlos says, his pace a little faster than normal. He regrets driving Charles to the meeting, knowing Charles needs a ride back to the hotel. Carlos wasn’t lying about having lunch, he may not be eating food, but he will be eating.

“She has you wrapped around her finger, smart woman. Alright, but you two are getting lunch with me and Alex tomorrow,” Charles brushes off the rejection. Carlos just nods, speeding a little more than usual to get back to the hotel. Charles chooses to attribute the odd behavior to Carlos getting used to the soulmate bond.

The few weeks that you’ve been together feels like years. Both of your fans find your relationship adorable, calling you the next David and Victoria. They aren’t wrong, like your Dad, Carlos would travel long distances just to spend a few minutes with you.

“You know what’s crazy? I would marry you right now,” you say softly as you lay in his arms one night. It’s not unusual for soulmates to marry after a month, after all, the bond is there for a reason, although some never marry because the bond is enough to them.

“I would say let’s do it, but I would have to ask your father first,” he agrees.

“Would I take your last name? How does that work in Spain?” You turn so you look at him.

“Well, no, usually you don’t take your husband’s name. I guess you could be Y/n Beckham de Sainz, but it would also likely come down to where we are married,” Carlos says, thinking over the logistics.

“I like the sound of that,” you test your potential married name out in your mind. “So what would our kids be then, if Spain has weird customs regarding taking your husband’s last name?” you ask, his heart beats a little faster when your hypothetically refer to him as your husband.

“Traditionally, it would be my last name then your last name, so they would be Sainz Beckham, but now it can be any order,” he says, already picturing a mini you running around.

“Sounds lovely,” you yawn. Carlos rubs you back soothingly, your cheek pressed against his bare chest.

“Go to sleep, mi amor, we can talk about it all you want tomorrow morning,” Carlos whispers, feeling your warm breath on his skin.

You never knew it, but he asked for David’s permission before leaving England. Carlos is incredibly grateful for the soulmate bond, he would choose you a million times over. He waits until the last race of the season to propose. You were with him for most of the races, only two conflicted with shoots you were booked for. You watch as he finds you right after the podium, sticky with champagne and sweat, and pulls you into a hug before getting on one knee.

“Y/n, you are my soulmate, my best friend, my favorite travel companion. These past eight months have been nothing short of incredible, and I want to formally make you mine. Will you marry me, Cariño?” Carlos asks, you stare at him in adoration.

“Of course I will,” you say, happy tears streaming down your face as he slides the perfect ring onto your finger.

I love you, Carlitos

I love you more

You don’t rush the wedding, planning it for after the next season. Your mom offers to design your wedding dress and Carlos’s suit, an offer you both happily accept.

“Let’s get married at Bernabéu,” Carlos suggests, partially to see your reaction, one night in his London pad. The two of you make an effort to not only talk mentally.

“No way, Carlitos, if we are getting married on a pitch, it will be Old Trafford,” you shift away from him, horrified at your fiancé.

“Mi amor, I was joking,” Carlos laughs, pulling you back. “I did get us tickets for the Champions League knockout match at Old Trafford,” Carlos says and your eyes widen. The game is only a few weeks away.

“You what?”

“Well, technically it was your dad who got the tickets, I just paid for them,” Carlos smiles, loving your excitement. He didn’t buy tickets, but he can’t tell you about the surprise.

“I haven’t been to a game in so long, you are the best, Carlitos,” you wrap your arms around him, tightly hugging him.

You end up in a box with your family and your dad’s former teammates. Except for your mom and Harper, they aren’t huge football fans. You are wearing one of your dad’s old jerseys while Carlos wears his white Real Madrid jersey.

Your dad wanted to surprise you, think of it like a pre-wedding gift

You look between Carlos and your dad with a huge smile on your face.

“Thank you, Daddy,” you hug him.

“Of course,” He squeezes you before letting you go so you can talk to your uncles. David takes the opportunity to catch up with Carlos.

“Uncle Gary!” You hug your father’s best friend.

“Hey kid, congrats on the engagement and finding your soulmate. Too bad he’s a Real Madrid fan,” Gary says, patting your shoulder.

“Yes, but look at him having the time of his life,” you chuckle, watching Carlos’s starstruck face as your dad introduces him to Figo, Zidane, Ronaldo, and Roberto Carlos.

“Is that Baby Beckham?” You turn around and notice Paul Scholes and Roy Keane approaching you.

“Who else would be wearing my Dad’s jersey?” you smile, giving them hugs. It has been a while since you were able to go to a game with your dad and his old teammates.

“Maybe your fiancé,” David Gardner shrugs. You did offer Carlos a replica of your Dad’s jersey from when he played for Real Madrid, but Carlos insisted that he had a lucky jersey.

“Yes, well, no one is perfect. He’s damn close though,” you chuckle.

“Language! Who taught you that?” Roy asks with a gasp.

“I believe we did,” Paul says, nudging his former teammate.

“Mi amor, I might marry your father instead,” Carlos tells you, only a little starstruck. Your uncles burst out into laughter.

“Carlos, these are my Uncles, Paul, Roy, David, and Gary,” you point them out individually.

“I’m her favorite,” David and Gary say at the same time.

“It’s Uncle Gary, he bought her her first beer and babysat her the most,” Brooklyn says, sliding up beside you.

Let’s go sit down, Carlitos. The match is starting

Good idea

You take a seat beside your brothers, which doesn’t bode well for Carlos when Real Madrid loses. The four of you celebrate as Carlos replays the mistake that allowed for a last minute goal. To make up for the loss, David convinces his former Madrid teammates to sign Carlos’s jersey.

“Have a safe flight to Maranello,” your dad hugs you goodbye after the game. Carlos is still a bit in shock.

That season, Carlos wins the WDC, and there is no better way to celebrate than getting married.

The ceremony is beautiful. You rented a large villa in Spain for the ceremony and reception. You didn’t intent for it to be a large star studded affair, but that was just the nature of the two of you getting married. Your mom hit it out of the park with her designs. The satin wedding dress fit perfectly, and wasn’t too simple and wasn’t too busy. Carlos’s suit was perfect, red and white subtle accents are a nice touch. You both cry a little when you see each for the first time.

“Carlos, you are my everything. There isn’t anything that I wouldn’t do for you. I never thought that finding my soulmate would be as great as this, I’d happily hear you sing Smooth Operator in my head in every lifetime if it meant being with you,” you tell him in your vows.

“I never thought I would meet my best friend and soulmate while playing a charity soccer match, but there is no other way I’d want to meet you. You take my breath away, make me a better person, and love Football as much as I do. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you,” Carlos squeezes your hands.

You are my everything, Carlos

You are the air I breathe, mi vida

#f1 imagines #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #carlos sainz imagines #carlos sainz imagine #carlos sainz x reader #carlos sainz x y/n #soulmates

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sparrowrye · 2 days

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Demi Demon || Alastor x Reader, A3 part 5

Synopsis: Alastor disappeared for 8 years, leaving you confused, crushed, and angry. You spent those years building up your new self and protecting the haven from dangers left and right. What will happen when he returns to the new changes? Will he return anytime soon? Could you even go back to the way things were?

Previous part

Part 5: trouble in paradise

WARNING! You should make sure you're in the right mental headspace to deal with a challenging chapter like this (several mentions of suicide). Also, it's very long.

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"I am not having this conversation with you." I whisked around and headed for the front door, making sure my tail whipped against his leg as I did. He caught the end and yanked me back. I spun on my heels, teeth bared in a snarl, and eyes dark with anger. "How dare--"

"We are having this conversation." He took a step to meet me halfway, causing me to nearly run into his chest. He slammed his cane on the wood floor and brought his face close to mine. "Your behavior has been abrasive, rude, and unacceptable."

"My behavior? My behavior?" I slammed a hand on my own chest. "How about yours? You've been short with me and the children, you and Reagan can't seem to be adults and be in the same room for more than five minutes without tearing each other's throats out, you snap at Husker left and right, and you keep trying to tell me what to do."

He straightened up so he was looking down his nose at me. His smile was quirked up in a black gummy snarl. "The children are misbehaved, I refrain from speaking to Reagan but she insists on eliciting an argument, I'm treating Husker as I always have, and I am in no way telling you to do anything." His staticky voice was sharper than usual and he attempted to break through my shield with his mind. It edged on my anger as I reinforced the shield.

"That's right, you're not telling what to do." I jerked back my tail from his grip. "You're telling me what not to do. I've been on my own for eight years. Even longer than that before you came into my life. I don't need your protection or your help."

His ears bent back as his smile strained to stay up. My snarl fell from guilt.

"We have magic. You have far more advanced magic. If I'm in danger you can easily come and be the great savior. For now, leave me alone to hunt this bastard's factory down. I need to clear my head. Reagan and Lucas will take care of Nym and Thatcher." I turned back to the door, being extra careful to keep my tail close to my heels, and closed it behind me.

I morphed into my Dragon form and took to the skies. The wind whipped past my face and the clouds were a soothing dousing to my hot anger. I flew from cloud to cloud, keeping well out of sight until my wings grew tired from the exertion.

Incorporating Alastor back into my life, into everyone else's lives, didn't go as smoothly as I had planned.

The first biggest issue was the children. He didn't care for Nym and Thatcher in the slightest. He was actively annoyed by their mere presence and they knew it, too. It made them more avoidant of the house itself and more clingy to me when they were inside. They were either at my side or in their room -- never did they spend time with each other in the common spaces of the household. I felt guilty for letting that happen.

Reagan wasn't helping either. She and Alastor were always arguing whenever they were left alone together. Sometimes they even argued about me when I was present in the room. Reagan was protective of me, a trait I found admirable, but it was causing more problems than solutions. Alastor being Alastor, he didn't let any snide remarks or comments slide. I felt guilty for letting Reagan know more about the complicated relationship. I should've kept her oblivious for as long as possible.

Husker was also being avoidant. He didn't frequent the old house like he used to and any time Alastor stepped in the room he fell silent and stood on the opposite side of the room as me. It didn't take long to realize Alastor was upset that Husker and I were close--closer than Alastor and I. Guilt gnawed at my chest for not defending my friend.

The others, from Charlie to Vivian, to Althea, to Vilcin, and to everyone in between, were constantly asking me how I was holding up with Alastor. Reagan's words echoed in my head about how she and Husker had to deal with my affects of Alastor's disappearance. So I put on a smile and told them we were working on it.

Althea had caught me on the streets and tried to dig deeper, claiming that the thread between me and Alastor was very transparent. I kept up the act and told her we were taking small steps to make it stronger. She didn't believe me--I could tell by the way she looked at me--but there was nothing she could do about it.

I touched down in a random forest and melted into the shadows. I skidded across the unoccupied plots of land until I came to a town. I picked a random shadow and stayed hidden in it, listening and watching all around me. How much more simpler were these people's lives? My own life felt so vastly unique that it actually felt tragic.

I jumped from shadow to shadow, from town to town, for hours on end. No amount of hunting could reveal any kind of information. Though I wasn't really searching for anything. I knew Vox's trackers would lead us right to the factory but I needed something to do. My responsibilities in the haven had vanished--likely from Charlie's input--on the account of giving me more time to spend with my family. If only they knew that it would better help me if I had something to occupy my hands and mind.

So I stayed off the haven's grounds from dawn to dusk, and further on. I was procrastinating my next interaction with Alastor. I knew he wouldn't severely hurt me but the memories from when we first met had begun to resurface. Alastor always had a screw loose so what would happen if he was pushed to the very edge? I was likely going to be the one on the receiving end of it.

I manifested in an alley of a small town and sat down. I was exhausted; physically and mentally. I leaned my head against the cold brick and listened with my Demon ears, no magic, to the sounds of the quiet little town.

I could hear mumbled conversations from family's and couples, could hear the static of radios and televisions, could hear the rustle of a cat looking for dinner in a nearby street, and could hear my own labored breathing.

I was feeling panic. Why was I panicking? Why was I sweating so much? I hadn't used a lot of magic today or even recently. Why was my chest so tight?

My fingers gripped the stone beneath me. I scraped my foot claws so they drew little white lines in the pavement. My heart was thundering in my ears and adrenaline was confusing through my body for no apparent reason.

I leaned to the side on my forearms as it became difficult to breathe. My throat was so tight and my hands felt cold. There was no magic around me. I couldn't feel anyone. I couldn't hear or see anyone either, meaning any of Blackwater's legacy weren't nearby.

So what was wrong?

My breathing came in wheezes. I gripped my maroon jacket as I my vision darkened. My claws were scrapping against the pavement. I needed to breathe. My magic wasn't working. Why wasn't it working? I couldn't sit still. I just needed to breathe.

"What's wrong with you?"

My head snapped up at Vox's familiar voice. My lips pulled back in a snarl as I scrambled to my feet and attempted to collect myself.

"What do you want?" I demanded.

"You seemed like you were struggling so I came to check."

"How sweet," I mused sarcastically. I was so out of breath.

He gave me an unamused look. "Trouble in paradise?"

"That's none of your concern."

"Oh sure it is," he held his hands behind his back, "When my lovely guardian is shriveling on the cold ground in my territory, it becomes my concern."

Shit. I hadn't realized I was on Vee territory. I hadn't paid attention to any of the trademarks of their land.

"Don't you have a ring fight to broadcast?" I snapped. I was so hot. My magic was struggling to cool me down. Why couldn't I control my magic? Was Vox in on this? Was he causing this?

"My champion doesn't fight on weekdays." He casually pulled out his phone and started scrolling on something. Vox had concocted a strange mix of willing and unwilling fighters for a massive ring fight. He broadcasted these fights nearly every evening. They didn't always end in death but that didn't make it any less. It made me grateful that part of our deal included that I would not defend his stations if there was an active ring fight. It kept my name from being tarnished.

I hate politics.

I put my hands in my pockets and left the small alley. I tried to get Alcine to wrap around my legs to teleport me but she wasn't willing. Her large hat stayed within my peripheral as I tried several times over to melt into the shadows. Something was very wrong.

Vox's loud, metal boots tapped the ground as he came running up to me. I turned right as he reached for my face. Blue claws zapped with blue electricity. It ran through my body and left me frozen in place in the new location. My hair was sticking up and my tense body was ready to kill someone.

As soon as Vox's flat face came into view, I struck. My black claws wrapped around his throat and the other gripped the corner of his screen to keep his head from moving. I wrapped my tail around his torso and stepped my massive foot claws on top of his feet.

"I made it very clear that you were to never do that again," I hissed, spit falling on his screen in tiny drops. My voice had dropped and my eyes blackened. My own vision had a coat of dark purple across it.

"F-figured you could...use some personal space." Vox choked against my tight hand. I examined the room. It looked like a simple lounge room. The bright pink and various other colors told me we were in one of Valentino's studios. My magic reached out to feel we were down in Hell.

Vox stifled a cough. I shoved him away so his back hit the wall. "Why is everyone attempting to protect me? I'm the one who protected the Haven for eight years straight. I'm the one who killed Blackwater. I'm the one who you asked to protect your surface stations. I don't need help or protection!"

Vox rubbed a hand on his neck. "It's out of care," he shot back, "You've done a lot for everyone and we just want to return the favor."

"You can return the favor by staying out of my way and leaving everything to me. I can handle it." My tail whipped furiously behind me as I stepped in a circle. My foot claws tapped the tile loudly.

Vox fixed his suite. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're hella good protecting everyone but shit when it comes to yourself."

"What is that supposed to mean?" My eyes narrowed and I grew very still.

"This isn't the first time you're having mental problems. You almost didn't come back after killing Striker and Blackwater."

"How do you know that information?" I took several steps towards him.

"I have my sources." For the first time, he wasn't smug about it. Was he actually trying to be kind and helpful?

"You're an awfully nosy person." I was gradually reigning my magic in. I knew how to pick at the smallest bit of magic, thanks to Adam and Blackwater, but doing it while awake and conversing with another Demon was a different story.

"It helps me stay connected with everything that's happening. Hence why I gave you a phone but don't listen in. You need to stay just as connected as me." He reached his magic out to touch mine. I magically flinched away. There were few times in our interactions that we had had genuine conversations. This felt like one of them.

"You seem interested in helping me more now that Alastor is back." I put my hands in my pockets and pulled my shoulders back.

He gave me a funny look. "I've been trying to help for the past eight years. Are you telling me you haven't noticed? I'm the one who approached you about our deal."

"I know you've done nothing but flirt with me and try to convince me to leave Alastor."

"Now that he's back, I know you won't leave him. Well, I know he won't let you leave." He flicked his hand dismissively, eyes averted to the side.

Something about the way Vox said that itched the wrong part in my brain.

"You realize I have as much a say as he does."

Vox's sly look returned. That's the Vox I knew how to handle. "Do you? You're not even a hundred years old. He's got centuries on you."

"And centuries are supposed to mean he's in charge of my every step and word?"

"You're his soulmate. And he's--well--he's Alastor. He's not one to just let things happen."

"Are you trying to stroke my ego or degrade it? I've gotten both from you in the span of five minutes." I faked a look at a nonexistent watch on my wrist.

"I'm trying to talk you down from whatever panic attack you were having in the alley. And it looks like I did exactly that."

I took stock and realized he was right. My magic was back in my grip, my hands weren't as sweaty, my heart was at a normal rate, and my head felt clear. So that had been a panic attack? I didn't get panic attacks. I had meltdowns when things were too much but I never had a panic attack before. This wasn't good.

"I appreciate the help," I said, suddenly very sullen and not at all representing my Dragon Demon persona, "but I need to return home now."

"I'll be here if you ever need someone to grab a cup of coffee with." His tone was just as sullen as mine as he walked to the door. I melted with Alcine and found a small, empty alley in Pentagram City. Before I could convince myself otherwise, I teleported back up to the surface.

It was a new moon which made everything look pitch black. I could hear the splash of the waves at the base of the cliff and the whistling of the wind. I reached my magic out to feel Reagan, Lucas, Nym, Thatcher, and Alastor all safe in the house. I checked in on the young pair, the horrid nightmare of Adam standing over them resurfacing, before going to my bedroom.

Alastor was in his office so I quickly changed into soft night clothes and glanced at the old timey clock on the mantle. Why was he in his office at this hour? What was he doing? Was he avoiding me as much as I was avoiding him?

I casted the small fire out and climbed into bed. Alastor walked in a few minutes later. My ears strained to listen to his soft movements until he was lying in bed next to me. I ignoring the guilty pit forming in my stomach and put myself to sleep.

Had I known what would happen, I wouldn't have gone to sleep that night.

****

I let out a sigh and hung up the towel. I looked at my red eyes and saw another bright pair behind me. I screamed and spun a cast back at him, slipping on the tile as I did. The back of my knees hit the rim of the tub and I fell backwards in it. I scrmabled back with my hand outstretched. The faucet dug into my spine. He practically glided into the small room.

"Don't come closer!" I yelled. "My accuracy gets better every time."

"Your Slight magic stands no chance against me," he mused, "but I appreciate the confidence."

"The fuck do you want?" I demanded again.

"Should it surprise you that I want to meet my soulmate?" He tilted his head to the side.

"If you kill me you also die," I reminded him.

He chuckled. "I know how the magic of soulmates work, my dear." He stepped close and held out a hand to me. "If I wanted you dead, I would have done so already." The deepening of his tone didn't make me want to accept his gesture any more than already.

------

I landed hard on my back and felt a crack run through my spine. I sucked in a gasp of air and stared up at the gray sky. I gripped at the wet grass and tried to pull my strength back in. Alastor appeared above me a moment later, smiling down at my paralyzed body. He knelt beside my head so his ugly yellow smile came closer to my face.

"This suites you," he said, "this desperation. You're trying so hard to escape no matter what it does or if it kills you." He pushed a strand of hair out of my eyes. "Unfortunately for you, it matters to me because we share the same fate."

"Fuck you."

His smile lessened slightly. "I'll add another rule for you to follow." He grabbed my throat and hoisted me to my feet. His claws dug painfully into my skin until I could feel my blood soaking my shirt. He pushed me against a tree and leaned in close to my face. I pulled on his wrist and tried not to cough in his face. "Rule number five. Never speak to me in such a way again." He paused. "Words like that are unbefitting for a woman."

"You can..." I struggled to speak clearly, "you can...keep me here but...but I'm...but I will not play...play by your rules." My heart was racing as his grip tightened even more so. He dies if you die. He dies if you die. I repeated in my head.

He let go of me and I fell face first into the ground. I gasped and coughed up spit as I rubbed my throat. "Give it time." I saw his feet walk around to stand in front of me. "I can be very persuasive."

------

"I know what you're trying to do," I jutted a finger at him. I leaned against the wall to get off my injured foot. "You did this to me on purpose. You're trying to make me grateful for you."

"So what if I am?" He put his hands up like sharp ugly flowers. "After all, you should be grateful. You could carry on with a life in the rings or spend it in a distant safe house with nothing to worry about ever again."

"It's a cage."

"To you, my dear, everything is a cage." He walked over and put his hand out to me.

"What?" I looked between his red eyes and his dark claws.

"Are you ready to return home now?"

I almost wished he had just teleported me back without asking. I didn't want to touch him let alone take his hand. Who knew if he had conjured up some kind of magic deal that solidified when I grabbed his hand?

And yet, when I looked around at the quiet, dangerous town, I knew there wasn't another option. He would keep looking for me and a Full mage with his power could most certainly find me with ease. I didn't want to go back in that cellar. All because I had the worst luck in the world and had him as a soulmate.

I looked down at my feet and took his hand.

------

"What is it, doll? What's happening?"

"He's...the man...he's wearing a white suite...exactly the color of his hair...and he's yelling with her. They're fighting. There's yelling. He hits her. She's arguing back but not fighting. Why won't she fight?"

"Stay with me dear." She touched my lap. I tried to lower my tense shoulders but it was hard.

"He picked me up and...he closed the door on her. She's screaming. Why is she screaming? Why is he taking me away from her? I can't...I can't reach her. I don't...where is he taking me? I don't want to leave her."

"Enough sweetheart, come back. Come out of the memory." She touched my shoulder this time. "Come back to my store. Come back to this world. It's all just a memory."

"I can't stop crying. Why...is that my mother?"

"Sweetheart, you need to come back. You're going in too deep. Stop the emotions."

"But...I want to see her."

"We'll look next time. We can come back next time but you need to take a break. Come out of the memory. Come back to the store. Blink twice and look up."

I stared at the figure reaching out to me through the bars. I was so close. I just wanted to touch her hand one more time. But it was just a memory. She wasn't really there. She might not even be alive at all.

------

"You need to accept the fact that you will never leave this place for the rest of your life," he said with radio static behind his voice. He let me down so my feet were flat on the ground but so he could tower over me. I put one hand on his wrist and the other arm across his chest to keep him away.

"I'm growing tired of your antics. These little outbursts of yours will stop today." It was more terrifying that he was smiling through his anger. I leaned away despite the sheer drop beneath me and he followed, never more than an inch away. "If you don't want me to treat you like a caged pet, I suggest you apologize and quit it with this delusion of yours."

His smile was wide and his breath smelled like roadkill. He dug his claws further into the wound he created, making me wince. "I'm-I'm sorry." He held me over the edge for several heartbeats. Eventually he pulled me away but didn't let get off my neck.

"I never want to hear you mention anything about leaving here, again. To me or to Husker. Do you understand?"

I wanted to cough from the way he was holding me but I held it in. The tentacles were still pulling onto my wings and pulling them painfully down. My resignation made my shoulders fall. "Perfectly."

He let go. I turned to the side to cough, clutching at my bleeding neck. I felt the wounds closing but the blood was still plastered to my skin.

"Good talk." His cane appeared in one hand and he put the other behind his back. His voice sounded chipper again. "Come, dear, let's clean you up." He held his hand out towards the house, looking at me sideways. I took a deep breath and walked past. He walked close behind me.

------

"Sweetheart it's a memory. It's not actually happening," Rosie said.

I cried as the memory continued. I bit down on the man's hand but he just pulled my hands further away from my face. I tried curling in on myself but it did nothing. His other hand moved roughly over my skin as I screamed into the gag.

I felt Alastor's presence come from behind me. I squeezed my eyes shut and dipped into my mindscape. "Alastor!" I yelled as the memory dragged me back through my shields. I felt his presence wrap around my head and saw nothing but red. It felt like a string was being pulled out of my ear as he pushed me into the safety of my shields.

"You're safe. Come out of your head," he instructed.

I closed my eyes, pushing away the forbidden memory, and opened my eyes to the library. All three of them were surrounding me, staring down with panic-stricken faces. Alastor opened his eyes and took his hand from my forehead. His eyebrows were the only thing that told me he was upset.

Husker pulled me up to a sitting position as Rosie practically shoved a glass of water down my throat. I took several moments to catch my breath, the two of them trying to help calm me. I stared at the carpet and tried to think of anything other than that horrid memory. I didn't know I even had that memory.

"You're back, and you're safe," Husker said, holding out his paw. I took it and let him help me into a chair. I leaned back into the seat and looked around at the dark library. I was back in the house. I was safe. Relatively.

------

"Do you feel that?" Alastor stood, my hand still firmly trapped on his and pulling me to my feet. He smiled wide and tapped his fingers on his cane. It felt like a flow of magic was cycling between us. It was the same feeling as when a strong gust of wind blows in my face. It felt good.

"Did I do it? Did I unravel it?" I asked. Husker and Niffty were well awake and watching intently.

"Oh you most certainly did. The curse is gone and your true power shines through." His smile widened and looked janky, truly devilish. His eyes had a look of insanity to them. "It will only grow and grow with time. I will be there every step of the way to guide and harbor this power of yours."

I suddenly wanted to be twenty yards from him. I tried to let go but his grip only tightened. His shadow loomed behind him with a large smile and my own shadow turned into a dragon again.

"Our magic combined is like nothing I've seen before." He jerked my hand back so I stumbled into him. My head had to tilt way back just to keep eye contact. "Together, with our combined power, we will be untouchable." His hair had hardened into spikes and his antlers grew overhead. His eyes darkened and his smile reached well past them. Were those stitches on the corners of his mouth?

His claws weren't touching my skin but his grip was crushing my hand. I could feel pins and needles poking through my finger and it went straight up to my shoulder.

"You're...you're hurting me," I whimpered.

------

"Alastor...I..." It was getting harder to breathe. "I didn't...he took me. I...I didn't leave—" pain cut off my words. I squeezed my eyes shut as it rocked through my spine and into head.

"I'm aware." He pressed his claws around my temples and I felt the pain dull. He slipped his arms under my shoulders and legs, lifting me up effortlessly. "Take a look, my dear."

I opened my eyes to see the alley littered with dead and deformed bodies. There had to be at least thirty dead Demons.

"That was all you."

My shoulders fell with my spirit. I had killed all of them. I had even eaten some of them. Their sweet blood still lingered on my tongue and I found myself wishing for more. I could see their scared faces in my mind and feel my heart quicken at the mere thought of them being terrified. They had all been so scared when I had transformed.

Alastor turned the other way but I stared at the site over his shoulder. I actually wanted him to let me go so I could do it again. The energy from all of them still buzzed in my body despite the overwhelming exhaustion.

"I told you dear," my ear flicked at his voice, tears streaming down my cheeks and claws digging into his shoulders, "it's in your nature."

------

Striker grabbed Reagan by the throat and held her close to his face. I fought against the white rope trapping my limbs against my body, but it did nothing. My magic was gone from my grip and the rope kept me entirely immobile.

"You thought you could get rid of me that easily?" he taunted, eyes flickering over to me. "I'll haunt your dreams and your every waking hour. Just wait and see." He withdrew a white knife and plunged it into Reagan's heart.

I yelled and bolted upright from my bed. I fell off the side, covers trapping my legs, and tried to stand up. I choked on a sob and untangled myself.

------

"What does that mean?" she asked, voice quivering. He stopped his assault and took a step back to examine her fully.

"It means your family line has stayed pure since before the Great Collapse." When she showed no obvious sign of understanding, he let out a sigh and put his hands back in his coat pockets. "Magic was not a thing before the Great Collapse. Demons were leaked into our world and brought their wretched magic with them. They started having children with Humans and generations later, everyone had Demon's blood in them. You, my dear," he stood beside her and placed a hand on her shoulder, "are a rare, pure gem. You're not infected with their blood."

Reagan's eyes snapped over to mine. All I could think was - oh no.

He reached up to his face to remove his glasses and his horns. They were fake. "I, myself, am a pure Human." My eyes widened, mouth dropping open. He was a Human. He was a defenseless Human. No wonder he had made all those inventions. "And I'm so glad to have found another one to add to our family."

"Family?" she questioned with a tone of disgust.

"I've been all around the world and collected ten pure Humans. We're going to be the foundation of the new world. A world that isn't tainted by Demons." His eyes narrowed on me.

"We're not all bad," I tried, limply pulling against the chains. My energy was taking forever to return. "We've created a safe haven for everyone. A place where both sides can live peacefully together."

"That wont last long." He waved his hand dismissively. "Demons are ruthless killers and Humans can't fathom having anyone above them."

------

Blackwater's laughter reached past it all. "A true Demon thirsty for blood. I expect nothing less from Alastor's soulmate." He turned to look at Reagan. "Did you know about this?" She shook her head in response, eyes never leaving my writhing form.

"Not...not all...just me...just Alastor." I spoke through the spasms and clenched teeth. I don't know how any of them hadn't broken yet from the sheer force. My breathing was getting faster, my whines louder.

"This is the person you're entrusting everything to," he went on, ignoring my response. "Demons can't help but lie. Lie and manipulate. It's why they come from Hell."

------

"Hey hey, it's okay. It'll be okay. Please stay with me." Husker's pleas were faint. I was curled up in a ball in the corner of my room. My wings were wrapped tightly around my body and a shield of thorny vines kept Husker physically away from me. My claws were digging into the back of my neck, blood falling down my shoulders like a waterfall. My cries were loud and ear piercing.

The shadowed souls broke through my barrier and crawled over each other to reach me. They tackled me like ants on a sweet apple, hungry for my soul and the energy it could provide them. And I let them. My soul felt like it was being torn in eighteen different ways but I didn't fight back -- couldn't fight back.

Then they disappeared.

I looked around to see Lucifer sending them back and raising a bright white and gold shield in place of my shattered ones. My purple mind turned red. How dare Lucifer take away a much deserved death.

------

I pulled myself out of the dreams to see the same black souls pushing against my last shield. They were so close. They were crying out for my energy, crying out for passage, crying out of pain. They were stepping and climbing over each other. Some even tried to climb up my shield to claw through it from the top.

Voices. Voices everywhere. Voices I knew.

I will always be the master of the shadows. -- Alastor

You, half bastard, will get what you deserve soon enough. -- Adam

This involves all of us, especially me and Husker, because we're the ones who had to deal with how it affected her. -- Reagan

Tell me, dear, how's it feel to know that all your hard work will be for nothing? No one will challenge your haven now that he's back and defending it. You won't need our deal anymore but you're still bound to it. You might even be forgotten as news picks up on his return. After all, who can trump the Radio Demon? -- Vox

She has no idea where to even begin to understand herself. And you know only one kind of magic. I am the closest thing to whatever she is. And if you'd like to keep your soulmate alive and sane, I will be working with her to keep her mind from breaking. -- Lucifer

A shadow scraped a claw on my arm. I curled up on the floor and covered my head. "Everyone shut up!" I yelled out. Alastor was pushing against my shields, too, but I wasn't letting anyone in. Not Lucifer, not Husker, not the souls, and not him.

More claws caught my back. My shield was shrinking and their arms were breaking through the shield like glass. I couldn't escape the voices. I couldn't escape my past. I couldn't escape myself. Vox had been right. Alastor had been right. Husker had been right. Everyone had been right about anything and everything. Why was I so useless? Why was I so helpless? Why did I always need saving? Wasn't I strong enough? Hadn't I come a long way?

I would never be on Alastor's level, let alone surpass him. I would always fall short. My past would always come back to haunt me. I couldn't escape. Wasn't I enough?

Something shattered.

Something sharp and aggressive burst through my shields.

Something suffocatingly hot surrounded my mind.

Alastor filled my mind. Red and green colored my vision as his magic spread through my body like wild fire. I couldn't push him away--couldn't get him out. He pulsed through me like my own blood.

Then he pulled.

But I resisted.

My claws dug into the ground as he wrapped his red arms around my torso and pulled me into the darkness; pulled me closer back to reality. I screamed and pushed against him. I didn't want to go back.

"Leave me to die!" I yelled. I tried clawing deep cuts in his arms but they bounced off like rubber. I twisted in all different directions, jumped and dropped my weight randomly, and threw my head back in an effort to hit his face.

Sharp anger poked my mind an instant before I was roughly shoved into the mattress. My eyes snapped open to his glowing, towering figure.

I brought my legs up and shoved him away, nearly sending him off the end of the bed. I untangle my legs from the sheets and tackled him, sending him the rest of the way. "How dare you!" My claws enclosed around his neck. And he let me.

I stopped.

My hands were still around his neck, as was his mind around mine, and his eyes stared blankly up at me. Why wasn't he fighting back? Why wasn't he getting angry in return?

I stood up and backed away. He stood up and fixed his coat and bow tie, eyes fixating on me a second after. Orange sun was poking through the curtains. Was it the evening?

His unemotional eyes never left me as he folded his hands behind his back. I could see the faint string connecting our hearts. It wasn't tight. It was hanging loosely between us.

I fell to my knees.

My hands covered my face.

I began to cry.

I curled inward until I was as small as I could make myself. It wasn't until Alastor laid a hand on my back that I noticed he had moved. I fell under a breath holding spell for what felt like forever.

"Breathe my dear." His voice was soft, gentle, and exactly like I remembered it. "Take it slow." He threaded a hand past my shoulder and into the curled mess. The smell of cedar wood and sweat pinched my nose and I sucked in a huge gasp of sweet air.

I made several more as my body tried to regulate its oxygen intake. Alastor spoke more comfort words until my breathing wasn't coming in wheezes anymore.

His hand was warm. So warm. So comforting.

If I let myself bask in his warmth, how much colder would it be when he disappears again?

But the warm circles he was drawing on my back were oh so relaxing. So comforting. I've been waiting eight years for this. Waiting eight years to know why he left. Waiting eight years to be moved on a deeper level once again.

"My dear, I'm here," his radioless voice cut through the silence. "I am here to stay."

Against my better judgment, I unstuck one of my hands and reached his leg that was touching my side. It felt like I was trying to soak up the sun.

His smooth claws laid carefully, lightly, on top of my hand. It moved up to my forearm and captured my arm in his warm grip. He was real. He was here. I was touching him. He wasn't a ghost--wasn't a hallucination.

"I am here, love." His hot breath brushed against my ear. His other arm stretched across my back and hooked on my shoulder. He gave a small tug and this time I didn't resist, allowing him to pull me out of my tight little ball.

He shifted his position so his legs were on either side of me as I leaned against his chest. He was so warm. He began to hum, the vibrations in his chest nearly sending me back to sleep. I wrapped my arms around his narrow torso and wrapped my tail around one of his legs.

"I hate you." I choked on a sob. "I hate you so much."

"Shh, darling. I know." One arm kept my firmly against him while the other threaded smoothly through my hair. It felt so comforting, so relaxing, and so right. Alastor the Radio Demon was being careful, gentle, and loving towards someone. And I was the lucky someone.

"I hate you," I mumbled again. But I love you.

He placed a gentle kiss on the top of my head. I love you too, he answered through our minds. The connection was back. We were back. How long would this good time last?

He brought his hand around to my jaw and used his thumb to push my chin up. He locked eyes with me, his genuine smile stretching on his lips. He used another claw to push a small strand of hair out of my eyes.

"There's my girl."

And placed a soft kiss on my lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author's Note:

Big thanks to @wendigonamecaller for the help/ideas on this chapter.

We got over the big hump. Now is time for the sweet stuff :P

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist:

@wendigonamecaller @saccharine-nectarine @thesimpybitch @papas-ghoulette @masochist-downfall

#demi demon #alastor the radio demon #alastor x reader #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel #soulmate au #soulmates #reqs open

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through-a-blackhole · 2 days

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From their first ever meeting, Natsu thought of Lucy as a nice person.

Lucy had such genuine kindness that he wanted to form a team with her. Natsu, who only had Happy for company most of the time, wanted this nice weirdo he just met to form a team with him.

Their first few interactions really make you appreciate how far they’ve come together.

To Natsu, Lucy wasn’t Lucy Heartfilia, or Lucy of Fairy Tail at first sight. It was Lucy the Weirdo who was so Nice that she fed him even if she didn’t know him yet.

Natsu and Lucy’s relationship is so beautiful because you can see how organic it is. Even without Mashima saying it, their friendship is undoubtedly one of the strongest in the guild.

So I’m gonna wait until they get together, because at the end of the day, beneath love and all its glamour lies a strong and unshakable friendship.

#fairy tail #nalu #lucy heartfilia #natsu dragneel #natsu x lucy #ft #natsu #lucy #soulmates #fairy tail 100 yq #you know what #lucy really IS nice #sure shes a little vain and a little loud #but her kindness really stood out even to him #thoughts

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ere-na · 3 days

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since it's bojere dinner date anniversary I'm feeling sappy and rewatching it too. I forgot how wild it all was 😭 Besides all the hair ruffles that we all love so much, I was reminded again of:

J: "oh so you have a lot of money" B: "yeah you should see our hotel man😏"

Bojan repeating to Jere that his fav food is soup

B: "Who's Benjamin? 🤨"

J: "Maybe next year" B: "next Je~re 😀"

B: "let's play a game 😀 ask Käärijä something you wouldn't dare to ask in real life 😀"

B: "fuck Käärijä~" J: "fuck Käärijä~" B: "fuck Käärijä~"

B&J: "Yes we have one friendship" *hugging and giggling 😬*

J: "Where is your other bandi?" B: "I went to K.. um with Käärijä.. because um BECAUSE I LOVE OUR FRIENDSHIP SO MUCH"

it's only 2:55 minutes out of 16:58 😭 I can't do this guys 😭 what the fuuuck

#every time I look back at them I'm amazed #braincell instantly connected #soulmates #one soul one braincell #bojere

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notfavghost · 2 days

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In the silence between heartbeats, we find the true music of our souls.

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hanniballectercoded · 1 day

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Beloved

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punkpandapatrixk · 1 day

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I’ve been in search of You; not realising the whole time I was only searching for Myself. Still… I’d like to see myself reflected in you. That’d be so nice.

How is it that it’s been this easy to meet those who are bad for my Soul? And why has it taken this long to meet you? You, the one and only who’s good for my Soul.

You’re the only one I’ve ever wanted. Hear me sing from my Heart. I want to love you with all of my Heart.

And we’ll be perfectly alright. So long as we think of each other. It’s all happening all at once in our thoughts and dreams. I’ll see you soon~♡

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motojane · 1 day

Text

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pink-heart-writes · 2 days

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if you need a sign to let them go...

this is it, here you go

now do me a favor and love yourself more

you deserve better anyway

- nick <3

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ejfelikivansag · 3 days

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Veled akarok élni

életem utolsó percéig.

Lelkem utolsó lélegzetéig,

mert utolsó pillanatomban is azt sóhajtom,

mennyire nagyon

szeretlek.

#szerelem #szeretlek #szerelmem #hiányzol #hiányzik #életem #love #lovers #pillanat #soulmates #magyar #magyar tumblisok #magyar tumblr #saját

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eddiemunsons80sbaby · 7 hours

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Hard Habit to Break

Pairing: EddieMunsonxOriginalCharacter

Summary: When a chance at the career he always wanted came knocking at the same time that she received the worst news of her life, they were forced apart. Long distance, time on the road, and stories in the tabloids destroyed anything they had left, leading him down a dark road, playing the role of the bad boy rockstar his manager wanted from him. Now tragedy will bring him back to the town he swore to never step foot in again and face to face with her for the first time in years. Will he be able to stick to the plan or will she be the one habit he can't break?

Trigger Warnings: Cancer battle, death of a parent, grief, addiction

18+ Only

Then

Eyes the color of whiskey, of the forest after the leaves had fallen, of safety and comfort, of love, of everything that had ever meant anything to her, meant everything to her, beseeched her, begged her to say what he wanted to hear. But she couldn’t. Her brain screamed at her, her heart raged at her, her blood was rushing, pounding through her ears, an insistent sound, her entire body revolting against the words that were coming out of her mouth but she had no choice. What else was she supposed to do? It was an impossible choice, one she’d never imagined she would have to make.

“Eddie…I can’t,” Tori whispered, each word fracturing a piece of her as she knew it would. The fracturing would continue, shards of her breaking off bit by bit, until there was nothing left of her but a pile of brittle sawdust on the floor.

“Come on Funshine, don’t do this to me,” he pleaded, those ridiculously long lashes sparkling in the sun, beads of tears barely hanging onto the ends, each one just tearing her heart a bit more. If they fell, she was done for. She couldn’t bear to watch him cry. “I can’t do this without you, baby. I just can’t. I don’t know how to do this without you.”

She took his hands in hers, as warm as the rays of sunshine beating down on them. Hands that knew every curve of her body, hands that molded perfectly to her face, hands that held her together, hands that soothed her soul with just a touch. They were her hands. She knew every callous on those fingers, every ridge, every single line that shot through each palm. She’d traced them more times than she could count. She had these hands memorized, the chunky rings that left imprints on her skin just like this man had left imprints on her heart.

Her fingers toyed with those rings, the massive skull, the boar’s head, the cross. She brought his hands to her lips, pressing them over the small black stone of the ring she’d bought him for his birthday her junior year of high school. Tori swallowed, the action painful, her throat refusing to swallow down the sharp, jagged agony of what she knew she had to do whether she wanted to or not.

“I’m sorry. I have to stay,” she cried, staring at his hands, his short fingernails that he always bit down short. Her boy, full of nervous energy that kept him constantly in motion even when sitting still. They were jagged now, copper tracing along the ridges where he’d bitten too short and her heart broke just a bit more, knowing she was the reason for it. “You know that I have to stay right now. I can’t leave her.”

“Then I’ll stay too,” Eddie choked out, on the verge of panic, as if that were a real possibility. As if there were any reality where she would allow him to make that sacrifice for her, to give up everything he’d ever wanted. “I’ll tell them no. I’ll stay with you. I should be here with you anyway. I can’t leave you alone right now. You’re going to need me if…” He stopped, pausing to think about his words, a rarity for him which only indicated even more how much he truly loved her, not wanting to wound her worse than she already was. “When this is all over, when she’s better, then we’ll go together.”

Tori shook her head, finally bringing her eyes to his, sapphire meeting sepia, suffering mirrored in both shades. God, she loved him so much and she loved him even more for offering, for wanting to be by her side, for thinking it was even something he should consider but it wasn’t. She would never let him put his life on hold, possibly ruining his chances at achieving his dream, a dream he’d held for so long, for her.

“No, baby. No…I can’t let you do that. You and the boys have worked too damn hard for this. You deserve this,” she told him, willing him to listen, to accept this because the tighter he held on, the harder it was for her to let him go and she had to. “You can’t turn this down. This is too big of an opportunity, Eddie. I can’t…no, I won’t let you do that.”

“You don’t get to decide for me,” he argued, tears that had been clinging to his lashes now slipping down his cheeks, silent streams of sadness and heartbreak. No. She couldn’t bear it. How was she supposed to be strong when he was falling apart? “It’s my life, Tori.”

“But it’s not just your life,” she reminded him. “What about Gareth and Jeff and Matt? You’re going to make this decision for them too? They want the band. That includes you. Without you, the deal is off. You can’t do that to them, Eddie. You’re not the only one this affects.”

A growl of frustration burst from within him as he broke away, turning his body so his back was to her. Eddie stomped a few steps away from her. His head dropped into his hands as he began pacing back and forth, back and forth, as if he could find some grand solution to this problem if he just kept moving. That was her boy, always moving, never stopping, never letting anything catch up to him. But she knew there was no solution to this, none that meant they stayed together. They had come to an impasse, the only option was the one neither of them wanted to face but had to.

“Eddie, this is everything you’ve ever wanted.”

“No, it’s not. You’re everything I’ve ever wanted. You’re the cake, Tori. This shit is just the icing on top. Us, you and me, that’s what matters. I can live without fame and money and some stupid record deal. I can’t live without you.”

“You can and you will,” she stated simply, closing her eyes against the pain, a thousand papercuts that would bleed her out slowly. But Eddie would move on. He would bury himself in his music career and he would meet someone else one day and she would become nothing but a distant memory. The girl from the small town he’d left behind. The very thought made her stomach twist painfully but this was all she’d ever wanted for him. For him to be happy, to finally show the world just how amazing he was, for him to get everything he deserved.

“I can’t do this, Funshine,” he admitted softly, words muffled against his hands. “How do you expect me to walk away from you?”

“You’re not walking away from me, Eddie,” she assured, closing the distance between them. Tori slid her hands around his waist, her cheek pressing against the back of his leather jacket, inhaling that scent was just his, that scent she would recognize anywhere, that scent that would haunt her for days until she couldn’t catch it anymore. “You’re not leaving me. We’re just stuck in an impossible situation and it sucks.”

“It does suck!” he roared, causing her to jump. With a deep sigh, he spun in her arms, pulling her into his chest, his chin resting on her head, cocooning her in the safety of his body. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m sorry. I’m not angry at you. I know you’re doing what you have to do. It’s just so unfair. I fucking hate this. I hate this so much.”

“I know…me too…” she agreed, burying her face against his jacket, opening her senses in an attempt to absorb him. She wanted everything about him to be imprinted on her, downloaded like a file into her body where she could never forget, never lose everything that was just quintessentially Eddie.

He was going off to live his rockstar dream and it was everything she’d ever wanted for him. Tori had no doubt he would succeed. The talent this man had…there were no words for it. He was made to be on a stage, his presence larger than life. He exuded frontman energy in spades. And the other guys, their talent was wasted here in a small town like Hawkins that couldn’t appreciate them. They deserved stadium tours and standing ovations and hundreds of groups screaming their names. But she knew what that meant for her and her body recoiled at the very thought.

Eddie was heartbroken right now but give it some time and he would move on. He would have girls throwing themselves at him every single night. Just look at him. He was the most beautiful man she’d ever laid eyes on. He wouldn’t stay single for long. He would have more options than he knew what to do with. He would be okay. He would heal. He would forget all about the girl he left behind in Hawkins when he was surrounded by gorgeous supermodels and actresses while she…she would never forget, forever clinging to the reminders of what was.

“I love you,” Tori whispered, clinging to him, wishing she could crawl inside of him and stay there, follow him wherever this future took him. “I love you and that’s why I am letting you go, baby.”

“I don’t want you to let me go,” Eddie insisted, fingers pressing into the skin of her back as if he could mark her, brand her, claim her. He didn’t have to do any of that. She was already his, forever. It didn’t matter how much distance was between them or how much time passed, she was his completely and always would be. “Look, we don’t have to break up. We can do the long distance thing until…I mean, why not? I can call you and I can visit when I can and you can maybe come visit me and when you’re ready, then you can come be with me.”

Tori had thought about that. Jesus, this was all she had thought about for the last three months since Eddie had burst in their front door, grinning, bouncing with his good news only to find her on the floor, sobbing. He got the greatest news of his life on the same day she had received the worst news of hers. It was ironic really and not in a haha, that’s so funny kind of way but in a life sucks and just wants to destroy you kind of way. Just when she needed him most, his dreams were coming true and his dream was snatching him away.

“Eddie…” she groaned softly because every time she convinced herself that she was strong enough to let him go, he would say or do something that would make her weak again, make her want to forget everything she’d said. Long distance didn’t work. It would only hurt them both more in the end. “We’ve talked about this. We agreed that…”

“No! We didn’t agree on anything. You keep saying it will never work. You have all kinds of reasons why it won’t work but you’re ignoring the one reason it will.” His hands came to her face and she turned into his touch, rubbing her cheek over his palm, her body searching for him the way it always had. “We love each other. Tori, I don’t care if thousands of other people haven’t made long distance work. I don’t care if Robin and Vickie couldn’t make it work. That doesn’t mean we can’t. We can do anything, Funshine. Come on. You know we can. Does seven years really mean nothing to you?”

Tori reeled back as if he’d slapped her, stepping away from him, eyes wide, gutted by his accusation. A new emotion began to take over the sadness, anger rippling along her skin. How could he even think that? How dare he have the nerve to even say something like that to her. Hadn’t she made it abundantly clear how much he meant to her? How much she loved him? How could he possibly doubt it?

“How dare you!” she snapped. “You know how hard this is for me, Eddie. I fucking hate this! You think I want to be without you? Especially right now? I don’t. When I think about the future, you’re the only thing I see. You’re the only thing I want but I can’t have you. Our paths are going in different directions right now and there’s nothing we do about it. I can’t go and you can’t stay. Please don’t make this harder. Losing you on top of everything else is killing me, Eddie. I am trying to be strong here but I just…I feel like I am falling apart, like I am just going to crumble into nothing and I…I just…”

Sobs tore from her body, her shoulders heaving as she gasped for air, hyperventilating. Everything was falling apart. Her entire world was breaking, shattering. She was losing every single thing that meant anything to her and she was trying so hard to be strong, to hold it together for everyone around her but she was crumbling under the weight of it.

Then Eddie was there, his arms coming around her, keeping those broken pieces together, her own personal superglue, whispering in her hair, “Baby, I am so sorry. I know. I’m sorry.” His hand ran over her hair, cupping the back of her head, pulling her into the solace that was his embrace. “Shit. I’m so sorry. You’re dealing with so much right now. I don’t want to make it worse. I just…I can’t just get on that plane knowing I will never talk to you again. Can’t we at least try to make this work?”

“Eddie…you’re going to forget about me,” she whimpered, wiping her face against his shirt. “You’re going to be so busy. You’re going to have so much to do once you get there. You’re not going to have time to call me. And what happens when you meet someone else? I don’t want you to feel tied down to me. You don’t need that right now and what I have going on, it’s just too much.”

“Wrap rope around my hands and attach me to you because there is no one else. I want to be tied down. Tori, there’s never been anyone else. There will never be anyone else. You’re it for me, Funshine. I love you so much.”

“I just…”

“Please, baby, please,” he pleaded, his lips pressing against her face, kisses of desperation and hope, kisses she was helpless against. “Please just try for me. Let’s just try, okay? It’s not going to hurt to try, right? We can make this work. I know we can.”

She was so tired, too exhausted to fight him anymore. Even though her brain was telling her this would never work, even though she’d gone over it a million times, weighing the pros and cons and the cons always came out on top, Tori just couldn’t battle anymore. Her body sagged against him in surrender.

“Okay…okay…we’ll try,” she whispered.

“I love you, Funshine. I love you so much,” Eddie mumbled against her skin, clinging to her. “We are going to make it, baby. This is going to work. I know it is.”

She wasn’t sure whether he was trying to convince her or himself but in the end, it hadn’t mattered.

******************************************************************

Here is the prologue for my new Eddie fic. It will be original character. I have a hard time writing reader and I have been editing my chapters for Tumblr but it takes so much time. I understand if some of you would rather not read it because of that. I will start posting this book on May 29th so let me know if you want added to the taglist and of course I always love to hear what you think. Thanks so much for your continued support.

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