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vaporwavebeach-writes · 7 months

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Kinktober Day 12 (Medical Play)

BTAA Scarecrow x Reader (NSFW)

(1,223 Words)

Summary: you have a debilitating phobia of needles and Dr. Crane has the solution to overcoming those fears

Warnings/Tags: 18+, gender neutral reader, reader has MAJOR trypanophobia (fear of needles), panic attacks, exposure therapy, medical kink (duh), crane feeding off the reader’s fear, crane being unprofessional, doctor/patient dynamic, fingering

Notes: sorry this one’s a little late LMAO but literally? as someone who had SEVERE trypanophobia, this was kinda empowering to write, enjoy the fic!!!

There was always a sense of unease whenever you found yourself at the doctors office. Maybe it was the awkward silence of sitting in the waiting room, anticipating what’s to come. Maybe it was the little intrusions that came with a basic physical check-up. Maybe it was unsettling scent of sterilized chemicals, sanitizing the room. Maybe it was those beige colored walls, glaring at you for the duration of your visit. Maybe it was the fact that you were about to be subjected to one of your worst fears. Or maybe, it was the fact that your physician is incredibly attractive.

Yeah, that too.

You find yourself, laying on his exam table, staring up at the ceiling. His voice, playful, as he explains the clinical the proceedings of this visit, reverberates off the walls.

“I’m really glad to see you taking the initiative to face your fears, exposure therapy isn’t for the faint of heart, you know.”

Your heart flutters at his words. As someone who suffered from a fear of needles since childhood, you figured that now, well into your adulthood, it was finally time to overcome that fear.

Doctors appointments for important vaccinations or even just the seasonal flu shot was always enough to spiral you into a panic. Nightmares leading up to it, hyperventilating, and giving yourself panic attacks to the point of nausea or fainting were feelings you had become all too familiar with. Feeling the prying gazes of other people in the waiting room or judgmental nurses always caused your embarrassment to spike at what you thought, was your own childish anxieties.

Seeing Dr. Jonathan Crane changed all that. When you scheduled your first session with him, his office felt comfortable. Adorned with classic horror movie posters and little mementos about his interests gave the impression that you wouldn’t be just some patient to him, but someone who he would genuinely try to help with your issues. When time came to actually talk about your fear, he wasn’t mean, or judgmental, or condescending, but he was understanding. He was someone who took a deep interest in whatever you had to say, as a patient and as a person. When he suggested the idea of exposure therapy, you were hesitant, but he had helped you come to realize that you had to start somewhere, which lead you to the clinic.

“Thanks, doctor,” you smile nervously, “gotta start somewhere, right?”

“Too true,” he says, turning to you as he walks over to the counter. “I appreciate that you put your trust in me to help you with such a… Debilitating, vulnerability.”

You hear the metallic rustling from within the cabinets. You stare back up at the ceiling, yet your curiosity gets the better of you. Glancing back over to him, you spy him preparing the needles, sending a wave of trepidation through your body.

“The syringes will be filled with a simple saline solution, it’s not harmful, but the solution is not what you’re afraid of, is it?” Maybe it’s just your anxiety, but you could swear there’s a hint of eeriness within his voice.

“Hey, uh, Doctor?”

“What is it, sweet pea?” He asks jokingly.

“I um, I just wanna apologize in advance in case I freak out at the needle.” You muster out with as much courage as you can. “Like, I-I might cry actually.” You chuckle nervously. You actually do feel the urge to cry as uneasiness fills the pit in your stomach.

“Aw now,“ There’s a playfulness to his voice. You’ve heard it many times in sessions, but it feels a little unsettling to hear it now. “Don’t psych yourself up too much, remember your breathing techniques.”

You can’t regulate your breathing at a time like this. As he makes his way over to you with a little alcohol wipe, you feel yourself beginning to hyperventilate. You feel the sweat trickling down your forehead as your throat begins to go dry. You feel faint; clammy. That alcohol wipe was the calm before the storm. You were fine when it was swabbed across your skin, but it always signaled what’s to come.

“Dr. Crane, I don’t know if I-”

“The feelings you have right now are completely expected,” he hushes you. “It’s all anticipatory, you fear the dread of it more than the actual stick itself, and I think I have found a sufficient way to combat that,” his explanation is stern, but comforting. He takes his gloved hands in yours, feeling his warmth through the latex. “Do you trust me?”

You’re hesitant. Your eyes threaten to spill tears out of the sheer distress you feel at the moment, yet Crane stares at you confidently, as if he knows you will make the right decision. You let out a shaky sigh, “Yes.”

“Good,” he grins at you. His hand makes its way to cup your cheek, gently thumbing over you. It moves up and around, to the nape of your neck and through your scalp, playing with your hair. You practically melt into his touch, fear beginning to dissipate from within you. And it’s at that moment, he gives it a tug, eliciting a soft moan from your lips. “A good method to combating fear, is to add an equally positive stimulus.” He lets out a low chuckle in response, which you feel go straight to your groin.

“I think I catch your drift.”

“Trust me,” he whirls you around on the table, spreading your legs. You can feel the heat pooling in your sex. “By the time I’m done with you, your phobia of needles will be the last thing on your mind.” He eyes you up, feeling his predatory gaze all around you like you wish his body was.

“I don’t want to be afraid anymore,” you whisper desperately.

“Then let’s not waste any time.”

You two work together to undo your pants. Your sex drips with arousal as Dr. Crane’s hand makes its way past your underwear. Your legs shake as he grazes over a particularly sensitive spot. He adds more pressure stroking you steadily as you all but grind yourself on his hand.

“God, you are such a good patient,” he groans. “Your determination to cure yourself of this fear, by any means necessary, is remarkable.”

You let out a breathy moan at the praise. You feel his fingers enter inside you, curling up and fucking away any fear you had before.

“Dr. Crane,” you gasp. “I think, I-I’m-”

“Getting close?”

“Mhm.” You groan.

You feel yourself quickly reaching your peak, eyes slamming shut. As you feel Crane’s fingers speeding up, there’s a sharp, painful sensation in your arm, making you cry out in a pained whine. With the pain, soon follows your orgasm, which tears through you frantically.

Breathing heavily, you come down from your euphoric high, to find Dr. Crane removing his gloves, smiling over at you proudly.

“Congratulations,” he smirks. “We’ve made excellent progress in overcoming your phobia, I think we’ve made a break through.” Washing his hands in the sink, he takes a seat on the table beside you, that playful tone once again adorning his voice. “However, I think we may need to have a few more sessions, fears aren’t cured overnight you know.”

You giggle, looking at him feeling giddy. You couldn’t wait for your next appointment.

#btaa scarecrow x reader #jonathan crane x reader #jonathan crane x you #jonathan crane smut #btaa scarecrow #scarecrow x reader #scarecrow imagine #scarecrow x you #jonathan crane imagine #kinktober #kinktober 2023 #mia writes batman!!!

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badwithten · 1 year

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Happy Birthday I.N.

PAIRING I.N. x fem!reader

GENRE angst, apocalypse au

WARNINGS zombies lol, death, murder, mentions of abuse, guns, unedited

WORD COUNT 889

A/N ok so was supposed to be writing my valentines piece but then remembered it was a certain someone's birthday,,, so here is my birthday piece for jeongin! i always get intimated by writing for birthdays bc i feel like it needs to be fluffy but i’m so awful at that so instead i’m writing about my current obsession lmao

Yang Jeongin, a weak teenager in highschool. Small and scrawny, easy to be picked on by boys who hit puberty early. Y/N L/N, a new student at the local school. Left out and lonely by popular girls with their cliques.

Yang Jeongin, the first friend you made in highschool. The first one to reach for you and offer you a helping hand. The first boy you kiss. The first boy you loved. You found yourself at home with him, both in your heart and quite literally as your roommate.

Despite only renting with him, it was still your first home. The first place you could call your own and Jeongin was there with you every step of the way. The both of you were still young, he was still a small teenage boy and you were still a naive love sick girl.

He held you in his pale arms, tighter than what was comfortable for you but you lay in peace allowing him to do so. It was his way of saying I love you.

You sang to him as he held you, it was off key and pitchy but he listened anyway. It was your way of saying I love you.

That day it happened was an awful awful day. You witnessed men eat each other. Making eye contact with them showed you the hunger of the gods that they were cursed with. An everlasting ditch in their stomachs that made them ravenous. It took the light that Jeongin held in his eyes to ease the panic in your soul. The truck he drove out of the city was enough to keep you safe for now.

Yang Jeongin, a man obsessed with proving himself. Muscles built and scarred, proving to others how strong he was during this madness. Y/N L/N, a lost woman who turned to helping others. The smell of alcohol and the prick of needles taking up her days

Yang Jeongin, the only friend you had during the chaos that the world was currently in. The only one to help you and care for you wounds after days of helping others. The only one you ever cried to. The only boy who ever saw you bleed.

Despite the loneliness of the apocalypse and your desperate need for company, specifically Jeongins company, you found his trips lasted longer. His returns becoming shorter. Bit by bit you watched him break down and leave you. The both of you were no longer young, he was now a rugged man who went through war everyday to fight for your survival but you were still naive, convinced that one day this would all get better.

He screamed at you, made you cry if it meant you would stay home and not put yourself in danger. It was his way of saying I love you.

You begged for him not to leave but when he did, you would wait for him like a child despite the abuse he put you through. It was your way of saying I love you.

The next awful day in your life was the day he told you he was leaving for good. A new organisation came up that promised the saviour of humanity. But you knew what these ‘forces for good’ did to people. It was just a way for egomaniacs to get free labour out of lost souls. Without much thought he packed and left you alone. Nothing could keep you safe now.

Yang Jeongin, a man consumed by blood lust. He was convinced what he was doing was for the greater good, in reality it was only benefiting those above him. Y/N L/N, a wandering woman consumed by heart break. Each day she walked til her legs gave out, desperate to find the one she lost.

Yang Jeongin, the last face you’ll ever see. The last person to touch you, to feel your skin while it was still warm. The last person who will ever hear your screams. The only boy who ever made you bleed.

Despite the relationship you once had with him, here he was, standing over you. The barrel of a gun stared down at you. His once loving hand held it to your head. His beautiful face was covered by fabric to hide who he was. But you tell who he was from a mile away. You thought he would have recognized you as well. Yet he shot at you anyway, across the field from where you began to enter his campground. Even bleeding out you felt a sense of security as he approached you, he would realise his mistake and help you.

You soon discovered he was only there to finish the job.

He didn’t say a word, only shaking his head in disappointment as you lay on the ground below him, bleeding into the earth. It was his way of saying you should’ve stayed where he left you.

You silently begged for him to change his mind. Tears flowing harder than they ever had. The apocalypse, the killings, it had changed it beyond the point of recognition. You don’t think he even knew who he was anymore. You reached forward and pushed the gun against your forehead. It was your way of saying I forgive you for what has to be done.

#k-labels #kflixnet #skz #i.n #jeongin #yang jeongin #stray kids #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #i.n x reader #skz angst #stray kids angst

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rosielav · 1 year

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would you write about alina’s divine quest to make cirese audibly laugh at something?

"Ta-daaaaaaa!!!"

With a flourish and a clack if her tap shoes, Alina finished her performance. She lowered her head, after her triumphant ta-da, and looked at her sister, expecting to see a wide grin on Cirese's face, and maybe hear a light round of applause. Instead...

"Resee are you seriously texting right now?? Did you even /watch/ the show?? I made it specifically for you!!!"

Cirese, without looking up from her phone, or pausing her furious texting, shrugged.

"It's a tap dance, why would I need to look? The taps sounded just fine. Great job uh... Tapping."

Alina grumbled something about 'more than just tapping' and huffed off the small stage she had set up to practice her show on, and Cirese only stopped her texting when she heard a strange clamoring and clanging from the direction her sister walked off to. She looked up, expecting to see Alina rummaging through a bag or something, in a desperate attempt to grab her wandering attention, only to find a lanky, sullen faced man in a suit standing before her. This caught her by surprise, but she only offered the man a cocked eyebrow as a greeting.

"Hello young lady, good afternoon. I am here on business, do you by chance know where I could find a circus and a lean-to?"

Cirese blinked slowly at the man, before gesturing vaguely around.

"Not sure if you noticed, but you're in the circus. Big tent, some trailers, literal clowns walking about. Are you sure you're looking for a lean-to, though? Not sure you'll find one here."

The man laughed nervously, clearly intimidated by the blue-haired stone-faced woman in front of him. He started to sputter out some kind of response, before motioning for her to wait for a moment, and rummaging through his bag. After a few moments, he took out a single piece of paper which had an email printed out on it.

"Here you are, right there in black and white. Dear Mister Johnson, that's me, ahem... Dear Mister Johnson, please come to this address, where you will find... And as you an see here, there's a bit of smudging from the printer, but it says that I am to come and speak with... No, meet with...uh...and then these words, which I took to be Circus and Lean-to."

The edges of Cirese's mouth twitched a bit as the man, this apparent Mister Johnson, described what was on this page, and she bent forward to see it for herself. After just a moment of skimming the smudged words, she clasped a ha s over her mouth and abruptly walked away, ignoring Mister Johnson's requests for a response or explanation. After she walked a few dozen feet away, she hid behind a tree, pushing her back against the rough bark, and in doing so pushing a laugh straight from her belly. She doubled over, tears streaming down her nose and onto the pine needle riddled ground.

"I /knew/ that would get you!!! I absolutely knew it!!"

Cirese yelped in surprise, her laugh suddenly cut short by her older sister's voice.

"Ever since we were kids, when someone would misread your name as circus, or mispell it, you'd be crying laughing. I knew it would still work! Caught you off guard, didn't I, didn't I?? Ohhh come on don't look at me like that, I finally got you, fair and square!!!!"

Cirese puffed out her cheeks, in much the same way she did as a child, and tried to feign anger at her clown of a sister, but all she managed to do was make Alina laugh, long and hard, tears leaving multicolored streaks down her face as they washed away her full face of paint, red cheeks now green and white and black and pink. Nothing brings Alina joy like making her baby sister laugh.

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shxdowsofombra · 1 year

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Medicine

[Hope]

Hope sat in the dark room and she just wanted to be left alone. Her eyes burned from crying all day and honestly she wanted to sleep, but she couldn’t. She heard a knock on the door and sighed as she snuggled into the pillows harder. “Go away.” She said softly.

[Zach]

Zach had been tending to the baby that made it as he knew that Hope was exhausted. Hearing the door opening and seeing someone walking in, he recognized who they were. He put the baby down before going over and picking up the boy by the throat before he could pull out the needle. “I have been looking everywhere for you…you are the last one I need to kill. The last one of that horrible group she was part of…”

[Tate]

Tate walked into the room and could hear a baby crying and just sighed as he moved over to Hope. “I got your message. The doctor said you need to take medicine, but you aren’t letting him give it to you. Can I give you your medicine Hope? Please.” He asked as he sat beside her on the bed and took out the needle.

He didn’t even see Zach in the dark room before feeling him picking him up by his throat. “What are you talking about?” He struggles out as everything on his lap dropped and broke.

[Charlie]

Charlie had heard about what happened and he went to go offer his support to Hope knowing that it would really hurt her to lose a baby. However when he stepped into the tent he saw a completely different scene than what he was expecting. “Put him down.” Charlie said before shifting and biting down on Zach’s arm so he would let go and then stood in front of Tate as he bared his teeth at Zach.

[Hope]

Hope heard Tate’s words and was going to give him her arm before she saw Zach picking him up by his throat. She moved over to him after Charlie bit him and looked at Zach. “What the fuck are you doing? And why the fuck would you bite him?” Hope asked Charlie. “Is what I’m going through not enough? You want to fucking fight? Seriously?”

[Zach]

Zach let go of Tate when he felt Charlie biting his arm. “The fuck was that for? You do realize he is the last one of the people that used to fuck around in high school with her. The group of people she hung around that would do things to her and with her. You have heard about it, she probably told you.” He growled as his eyes turned bright red. “He is the last piece before Hope can truly be rid of all those horrible things in high school she was put through. Now move.” He says before shifting his arm and practically throwing Charlie across the room.

[Tate]

Tate grabbed his neck as he struggled to breathe before hearing Zach’s words. “Oh you have got to be kidding me. I didn’t do any of that shit. I didn’t even hang out with her and those stupid assholes. We hung out separately. This is so fucking stupid. I am literally here to help your wife and you broke it.” He says looking at all the vials on the floor before seeing him throwing Charlie across the room.

[Charlie]

Charlie had no idea that Tate was going to be there so he didn’t even think of the fact that Zach might put two and two together. “Listen to him, he is telling the truth. He wasn’t with her.” He growled before hearing Zach’s words and then feeling himself being thrown against a wall. There was a snap but that didn’t stop him from getting up and charging at Zach and headbutting him across the room. “I said stop! He is my boyfriend, you idiot. You aren’t killing him. If you want him, you go through me.” He snarled as he stood his ground, there was some blood dripping from his side but he hadn’t even noticed it.

[Hope]

Hope just shoved Zach as her eyes turned blue. “Is this who you thought I was dating? God Zach, no. I never dated him. Let alone liked him. He was the only guy who didn’t want to fuck me. I just let him follow me around because I liked having one friend who didn’t see me as a plaything. And even if he was why…why do this now? Why? Is us being broken not fucking enough for you?” She asked as she started crying. “For fucks sakes. I cannot do this right now.”

[Zach]

He saw her eyes turn blue but before saying anything he was headbutted across the room. “Everyone that I watched said you were. Everything and the signs were there. The pictures of you two together. You can’t tell me that…why do it now? Because I want it to be over that’s why. All the pain you went through. All the fucking shit you were put through. If it’s gone you don’t have to worry about it coming up ever again. I don’t have to watch as you suffer because someone leaked more personal things about you if it ends now. He is the last one. He is the end of all that. It will help us to heal Hope, to leave behind those wounds and let them turn into scars. No one would be able to use your past against you ever again. That was what you wanted.”

[Tate]

Tate saw the two fighting and wondered if they were just used to using their powers to fight like this. He picked up the glass off the floor and put it in the bag before seeing the blood on the floor. “Charlie, I appreciate the support but you are bleeding pretty bad. You should stop.” He said before looking over at Zach. “If killing me makes you feel better, then go ahead. But we both know that isn’t it. You don’t seem like a stupid person and I know I’m not. So if I knew all of my friends I used to go to school with are dead or ‘missing’, I’m not going to come here to your wife in the middle of you grieving to take her away from you. You would have to be batshit crazy to do that. I am here as a friend. As someone who had medicine that could have at least taken some of her pain away.”

“But go ahead, kill me. I am sure it will fill that void you are ignoring. I have watched multiple people die. I have been the doctor to some of them, if you think you are the first family member to try and kill me you are wrong. And I doubt you will be the last.”

[Charlie]

Charlie heard Tate’s words and just shook his head. “You don’t touch him Zach.” He says as he starts to heal himself. “I came here to help take away her pain since I knew she wasn’t going to take the medicine. You can’t just kill people like my father does. It doesn’t solve anything.” He tells him before going over to Hope who was crying but still near Tate in case Zach was an idiot again. “Let me help take some of your pain just like dad taught us okay? No needles, no medicine, just you and me. Okay?” He asks her as he takes her hands in his. “Can you let me do that for you? Please?”

[Hope]

“That’s not what I meant Zach. I just wanted to move on. I don’t want to be that girl anymore and you said I wasn’t so why do they matter?” She asked in between sobs. She heard Tate’s words and she just looked at Zach. “I’m sad too Zach. And it’s okay to be sad with me. I don’t need you to go out and kill people. I need you to be with me. Because I won’t make it if you keep leaving. I just won’t…” She said before moving away from Charlie. “I don’t…I don’t need you to do that okay. It’s…it’s never going to take the pain away.”

[Zach]

“As long as there are people alive who know or have connections to your past they will always bring it up to hurt you. I…” He stopped as his eyes flashed blue and his eyes started to water. Hearing her words, he got up and ran over to her and just hugged her and held her in his arms not wanting to let go.

He couldn’t stop the tears from falling down his cheeks as he just held onto her. “I am sorry. I am so sorry.” He cried. “I am not going anywhere. I am here. I love you so much. I can’t lose you. I can’t…” Zach just buried his face against her neck.

[Tate]

Tate just sighed as he watched the two. He texted the doctor he would need more medication before looking over at Charlie. “Are you okay? That bite looked pretty bad.”

[Charlie]

“I can make more medicine.” He says as he went over to the vile pieces and picked them up before using his magic to fix everything from the kit. Charlie was still bleeding slightly but it stopped bleeding as much. “Here, everything is back to how it was. But she won’t take it.” He tells him before seeing Zach’s veins turning black, knowing what the other was doing. “He is her medicine. He is taking away the pain.”

[Hope]

Hope felt him holding her and she heard his words as her eyes turned a brighter shade of blue. “I love you too.” She said softly as she felt him crying into her shoulder. She felt some of her pain go away and she just held onto him tighter.

[Zach]

Zach held onto her and his eyes glowed brightly as he started to absorb some of her pain and burned it off with his powers. He didn’t let go as he just continued to hold her.

[Tate]

Tate nodded as he heard Charlie’s words. “Still medicine would be good for her. Especially if she’s not sleeping or feeding the baby.”

[Charlie]

“Just give him some time. He will be able to absorb enough for her to agree to take the medicine hopefully.” He says before going over to the cabinets and looking for something to help remove the glass from his side.

[Hope]

“I am so tired.” She said softly as he held onto her. “I just want the baby to stop crying.”

[Zach]

“I know, baby girl. I know.” He tells her. “He doesn’t cry when you sit with him though and just letting him lay on you would be good. I heard it is supposed to soothe babies from crying. I can lay with you too.”

#muse: zach #muse: charlie #charliextate #zachxhope #hope243 #tate008

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jordanstrophe · 2 years

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Whumpee escaping a hospital 👀

YES YES YES- (*ehem*... I may have gotten quite carried away with this one, so fair warning if you’re not comfortable with hospital/medical themes♡)

CW: Hospital escape, IV’s, syringe, popped stiches, restraints threatened, forcefully carried, hurt/comfort

They behaved until the lights dimmed and the facility fell quiet. The doctors kept assuring them Caretaker was coming, but they never did.

They knew the truth. They knew the lies. A ploy of false promises to keep them there.

They slipped out of bed and gripped the IV connected to their arm. They gritted their teeth, before sliding the needle out from underneath their skin. They exhaled and let it drop and hang from the bag, before rooting through their belongings and finding a coat.

They had played their game for long enough they didn't have a watcher. Their room and halls were mostly empty for the night as they crept close to the wall for comfort. They froze and shivered from stress, seeing from around the corner a cluster of shadows and murmuring voices. They didn't know if they should run, or keep laying low.

"Can I help you?" A voice spoke from behind. Whumpee violently gasped and spun around, staring at them like a deer in headlights. "Heey, it's okay! Jumpy thing... I didn't mean to scare you. Are you alright?" They asked, their eyes subtly looked them over, until they locked onto the tag around their wrist.

"You’re a patient?" They tilted their head to the side.

Whumpee's face notably flushed. They kept trying to speak, but all that came out were quiet fumbling words. The person sighed and crossed their arms. "Hey I get it. If you’re here, then you’re having a rough time. So let's get you back to bed, aright? I'm sure you'll feel much-... HEY!" They shouted, watching Whumpee turn and just bolt for the door the second they mentioned ‘going back’.

Whumpee heard pounding footsteps and voices calling for them, but they didn't dare stop running. They slammed their palms against the door and pushed as hard as they could. They felt something pop deep down in the side of their ribcage, but they didn't have the composure to stop themselves.

Their feet hit the hard pavement and they could hardly see where they were going. The air turned cold quickly and shortened their breath. -And if that wasn’t the worst of it, their breath got stolen as someone slammed their shoulder against Whumpee’s waist and hoisted them over their shoulder.

The cry they let out was the most sad and pitiful thing. They wept and struggled the whole way back, hearing the dreaded jingling of the buckled restraints getting prepared for them once again.

“Enough! That’s not necessary. I have them.”

Whumpee immediately tensed at their voice. Their thrashing and shouting quieted as they allowed themselves to be carried back to bed. They were in tears before they were even laid down, a tender hand thumbed their cheek the second their head touched the pillow.

“You sure gave me quite the startle! Imagine my surprise when I came to see you, only to run into you in the parking lot- quite literally.” Caretaker chuckled. Their face paled when they looked down at their hand, noticing a smear of red across their palm.

“Oh, Whumpee...” Caretaker softly scolded, taking their coat and unwrapping it from their chest, seeing a soaked red stain on the side of their hospital gown. “You popped a stitch! You can’t just go running off like that, you should have been resting! Why were you even out there in the first place?” They stammered, frantically waving for a doctor.

“I-... I was-...” Whumpee tried to confess, spiraling into a mess of tears.

“I was looking for you.” They whimpered, covering their face as Caretaker sighed and quickly pulled them into their arms. “I’m so sorry, I-... I got here as soon as I heard they found you. Are you okay?” They asked, brushing their hair from their eyes. Whumpee whimpered and flinched into a nod, giving them a small relieved smile.

“I am now.”

o(^∀^*)o Thank you for reading! ~ @grizzlie70 @lave-whump @amethysts-sideblog @whump-it-like-its-hot @thingsthatgowhumpinthenight @yet-another-heathen @princessofonward @whatwhumpcomments @ill-eat-you-if-you-cross-me @mascmasochist @hamiltonwhumpdump @shokuhoemisaki @as-a-matter-of-whump @whumpasaurus101 @lonesome--hunter @whatwhumpcomments @digitalart-dwa @mabledonut @myst-in-the-mirror @whatwhumpcomments @melancholy-in-the-morning @anonintrovert @sunflower1000 @shywhumpauthor

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gotnofucks · 3 years

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Lover’s Quarrel

Pairing: Steve x Reader

Summary: You have the powers to resurrect if you’ve been murdered, and a jealous Steve Rogers indulges heavily in your abilities. He would not let you steal his best friend, that was for sure. So what, if your rivalry regularly caused fire and harm to public property? You just couldn’t let the other win.

Words: 4.3k

Warnings: Smut, enemies to lovers, violence, killings and murders (but reader cannot die, it’s weird. She has some sorta powers that help her revive when she’s been murdered), language, 18+ ONLY

A/N: Is this crack fic? Idk. Maybe?

The sixth time Steve killed you, you decided he needed to be dealt with in a similar way. It doesn’t matter that he cannot come back from the dead like you. He just needed to go. You were tired of him offing you every time he felt threatened by your existence. But this was the last straw. He had pushed you off the Quinjet while flying home from a mission and you’d fallen into the lake and drowned. You would NOT recommend dying that way.

Bucky had dragged out your dead body and watched over you as the blessing of the necromancer worked its magic over you and brought you back to the world of the living. The first words out of your mouth as you spewed out water were, “I am going to kill your best friend and you can’t be mad at me for that.”

Bucky, far too happy to have you back – poor guy still mourned every time you died – ignored your comment and pulled you into a hug. He’d never quiet gotten used to seeing you die. You patted his back, muttering a few there-there’s until he was calm enough to press quivering kisses on your head and temple.

“You need to stop dying.” He said into your hair, holding you close.

“I would not be dying if your best friend didn’t murder me every time! He is a menace, Buck!” You cried in exasperation. The said best friend was watching you from a few yards away, and he rolled his eyes as your words reached him. He scoffed loud enough for you to hear and you sharply turned your head to glare at him.

“You!” You shouted, quickly standing up and marching over to him. “You rascal!” And then you pried out your wet shoe from your feet and threw it at his stunned face. Unfortunately, it didn’t hit his face but smacked against his chest, leaving the wet print of your soles against his far too tight t-shirt. He gaped at you open mouthed before baring his teeth in warning.

“Oh god, every time you come alive again, you’re even more awful than before!” Steve shouted, and then just because he is fucking drama queen, he threw out his hands. You sneered before turning to look at Bucky meaningfully, the most obvious ‘see what a dick he is’ look on your face.

Bucky shuffled uneasily, caught between your quarrel once again. He came behind you and gave you his jacket to wear to shield you from the cold. And just like that, your anger melted a little. Somehow, with his steel blue eyes, Bucky Barnes could sooth every wound you’d ever had. Even those given to you by Steve Rogers.

“I am so sorry. I should have seen what he was about to do. I wouldn’t have ever let you fall had I known.” He apologized and you swore your heart physically quivered. You pulled Bucky into a hug, hiding your face in his chest, savoring his arms coming around you to hold you tighter. You could have stayed in his embrace forever, but it was an annoyed groan that ripped you both apart.

“Is there any way you can stay dead a little longer?” Steve asked, breaking your moment. “I mean, I’ve tired a bullet and knife and water and poison. What can I do that you’d be gone for just a little longer?”

He was worked up, a red flush creeping on his face and neck. Pacing, he was muttering, and you wondered for the millionth time how Bucky could be friends with him. He was just so extra! You wanted to tell him to shove a stick up his ass, along with the one already there when he turned swiftly like the wind and threw a dagger at you. A metal hand caught it before it could hit you and you were pulled into the warmth of Bucky’s body quickly.

“Steve! Cut it out.” Bucky yelled, glaring at Steve. “You will not kill her again. I don’t care if she can come back alive again. You won’t hurt her.”

With that, he dropped the dagger on the ground and walked away with you. Unable to resist, you looked over you shoulder and flipped Steve off. Fucker could kill you a hundred times and yet he would not be able to do anything. As far as you were concerned, Bucky was as much your best friend as his. And if Steve Rogers couldn’t control his jealousy without trying to behead you every time he felt you were stealing Bucky from him, you would just have to make his death look like an accident.

“I don’t think I need to tell you that you can’t kill him either?” Bucky said teasingly, his eyes soft and fond. “I need you both to survive.”

You groaned, bumping your shoulder in his and snuggling into him as a cold breeze hit your wet clothes. He could read you like an open book.

“You are no fun Barnes.”

There was rubble and fires and shrieks. Natasha was yelling in Russian as she ran about with a fire extinguisher and Clint crawled out of his vents to help Bruce out who was turning a dangerous shade of green. Tony was sitting in the ruins of his kitchen, his mouth half open as he spied on the ensuing battle in the middle of it.

Sam was using his shield to push Steve away who was shouting curses that had probably not been invented yet. Bucky was holding you back by your middle, yelling in your ear to calm the fuck down but all you could think of to do was smacking Steve’s face with that chair that was currently on fire. You suppose once everyone was calm, you’d feel guilty about your part in destroying the Avengers kitchen but right now that wasn’t important.

What was important was that Steve had tried to kill you. Again. He had actually thrown a fucking grenade at you. You barely had the time to kick it away where it exploded in the kitchen and then Steve was on you, calling you a bitch in all the 9 languages he knew.

“Calm the hell down, Steve!” Sam yelled, struggling to keep Steve at bay from you. You were glad to see that Steve’s nose was busted. That will teach the bastard to ‘look down his nose’ on you now.

“She pierced my ears! The fucking bitch pierced my goddamn ears!” Steve yelled. Even you had to admit, the golden hoops looked amazing dangling from his ears. Just perfect.

“You are lucky I didn’t stick a knitting needle in your eye Rogers!” You sassily replied, “The only reason you’re still in one piece is because I promised my best friend that I wouldn’t hurt you.”

The muscles in Steve’s arms tensed and Sam groaned, barely keeping his own footing. A dark shadow seemed to have crawled over Steve’s face, turning the blues of his eyes an angry shade and had you been a weaker person, you would have trembled. This was the face of someone who had stood against armies alone and came out victorious. But for all you cared, he could kiss your ass.

“He is MY best friend. Mine. Not yours, not anyone else’s. Bucky Barnes is mine and I will kill you a thousand times until it sinks in your thick skull!” Steve growled. You scowled, a scathy remark bubbling on the tip of your tongue when you suddenly stopped. Why say when you can show? So, looking Steve directly in the eyes, you went limp in Bucky’s arms, turned around and cupped his face. And then you kissed his cheek.

Steve let out a strangled cry behind you, but you focused on Bucky who was blinking in disbelief at your audacity. And so, just for the heck of it, you kissed his other cheek. And then his forehead.

“Bucky Barnes, you are my best friend and always will be!” You said, hugging the life out of him. You heard Steve break away from Sam, heard Bucky yell out a curse and holding you protectively as his jealous pal came rushing to claim him. And all through that and the chaos that ensued later, you just smiled broadly.

Tony was giving a lecture, and he sucked. He gesticulated too much for your liking, and you really didn’t like how he kept emphasizing things by looking pointedly at you. It wasn’t even that much of a big deal, and even if it was, it was not your fault. Like every other time, the only person who could be held responsible was the blond super soldier sitting beside you, wearing the same shade of annoyance on his face as yours.

“I repeat” said Tony, his hair askew, “we do not use Friday to settle idiotic, absolutely ridiculous personal vendettas!”

“You have Friday tell you how pretty you look every day!” You countered and Tony slammed his hand on the table.

“Because I am!” He huffed. “You, on the other hand, stopped a mission in the middle to ask Friday who had a higher score! I mean, what the actual fuck? And what score?”

Steve had the decency to look at least a little sheepish. You however didn’t put up with any of that nonsense. It was his idea anyway, and you wouldn’t take the fall for him. Not when Tony looked murderous like this.

“Rogers bet me he’d take down more enemies than me. We only asked Friday to keep a count. I had literally nothing to do with it.”

Tony turned the ire of his glare at Steve who was too busy giving you a dirty look. He was just pissed you won, and that Bucky had spent the entire ride back tending to your wounds rather than Steve’s. It wasn’t your fault his jealous ass always threw a fit whenever he saw you and Bucky together.

“You said the team could use Friday as we saw fit.” Steve said, though he did look a little guilty. It wasn’t like him to lose command and control. Even when he’d been Captain America, he had never let anything rattle him. Not until you had come prancing in his life and stealing his best friend.

“I said the team could use Friday, not stop everything in the middle of a high risk mission to see who has a bigger dick.” Tony said, and then he just collapsed in his chair. Poor guy had been working too hard to carry the team forward, and in that moment, even you felt guilty. Your rivalry with Steve shouldn’t have to affect everyone else, not when they had been so welcoming and loving to you ever since you joined.

You walked over to Tony and dropped a kiss on his head, caressing his hair. “I am sorry Tones. You won’t have more trouble from me.”

Tony looked at you as if seeing an angel. He looked at you as if you were the solution to all his troubles. Despite every furniture of his you’d broken and set fire to, he was so grateful to have one sane voice between them. Cupping your hands, he looked imploringly at you and asked, “Really? You’re gonna stop fighting with Steve?”

At that, you solemnly nodded and patted his hand gently. Poor him and the poor team going through hell because you and Steve couldn’t settle your differences. It was obvious what had to be done.

“Of course I will” You said magnanimously, because of course you were the better of the two. “Steve just needs to find another best friend and there won’t be any reason to fight anymore.”

If any of them had been drinking water, they would have spit it out. Since they didn’t, they just kind of choked on their saliva and sputtered at you in absolute disbelief. Tony actually looked betrayed and Steve seemed to have licked a lemon, if the look on his face was anything to go by.

“She” He said, voice thick with contempt, “needs to go away. We can launch her in outer space or somewhere from where she can never return. You know why? Because Bucky is my best friend. Since we were yay high!” And he raised his arms a foot off the ground to show just how high.

And just like that, the moment was gone. Rogers opened his mouth and any goodwill you had had went poof. So, you did the only reasonable thing any sane person would do right now and that was to flip him off and call him a pig. You knew he was inching to strangle you; you could see his fingers twitch. A part of you was anticipating it, for Bucky would never forgive him for killing you again. Just as he would have lunged at you, push Tony out of the way and did you away for good, Bucky burst into the room with the expression of a cantankerous 100 year old grandpa who had had enough with the world.

“For fucks sake! Just shut up you both!” He yelled and paced the room. His eyes were bloodshot and hair disheveled, a clear sign that your rivalry was taking a heavy toll on him. Steve opened his mouth to say something when Bucky raised a finger to shush him. “No no no! You listen to me you oblivious, utter moronic fucklets!”

Your mouth dropped open. Bucky never cursed at you. He had never called you a fucklet before.

“You two need to stop. You hear me? You need to STOP!” He raked a hand through his hair before kicking the ground in frustration. “I can’t eat. I can’t sleep! I can’t fucking breathe without you both arguing over who is a better friend to me. So, here’s an idea. Instead of fucking me over in the middle of your sexual tension, why don’t you find a room and fuck each other? Because I tell you now, I cannot fucking take it!”

Silence sat pregnant in the room. You blinked at Bucky. Steve blinked at Bucky. Tony blinked at Bucky. And Bucky didn’t blink at all.

“That – uh – what?” You said, eloquent as ever. “That is so stupid.” And you laughed awkwardly.

Steve glanced at you and then stammered, “What? That – I haven’t – that has nothing to do with it. She and I – what?”

You both found each other’s eye, quickly looked away and just became silent. The tension in the air was suffocating you, and a terrible heat was settling in your stomach. Without another word, you walked out of the room, muttering about how ridiculous the whole idea was. The three men watched your exit, and a moment later, Steve left too, still very much in disbelief.

Tony and Bucky sighed, sitting across from each other and just taking in the fact that the elephant in the room had finally been address. A moment later, Tony began drumming on the desk, looking up at the ceiling.

“I couldn’t have put it any better myself.”

You felt antsy, as if staying one more moment in your room would drive you mad. You kept jerking your legs and arms, a weird restlessness in every action of yours. What the hell was Bucky saying? The sheer nerve to imply that you…you and Steve had some sort of feelings for each other. You hadn’t heard that kinda crap since you nursed your nephew who’d had diarrhea.

The only reason you and Steve fought was because you wanted Bucky. He was supposed to be your best friend, and clearly it was his inability to decide who he preferred more that had led you here. And to pretend, on top of that, that it was you who was at fault was just ridiculous. As if you’d touch Steve Rogers with a ten foot pole.

But…would you? You suppose he couldn’t be that bad to touch. He did have gorgeous eyes that got all dark and dilated when he fought with you. And his breath hitched when you got him mad and he bit his lip to stop from cursing you and he flushed a very becoming shade of red that started from his cheeks and disappeared down the neckline on his tight shirts that –

Holy fuck!

The realization rocked your world. What the hell? When you thought about it again, it seemed as if you’d just described Steve being aroused. Did you really fight him and got him mad to stimulate yourself? Oh god. Bucky was right. You wanted to fuck Steve.

This wouldn’t do. This wouldn’t do at all. You quickly changed into your work out gear and rushed to the gym, intent on sweating out whatever feelings you might have for Steve. After all, nothing says fuck you like imagining someone’s face on a punching bag and just going to town on it. Thankfully, when you arrived the gym was empty.

You’d been working on your stretches for only a few minutes when your worst nightmare entered the gym. He probably had the same idea as you and froze the moment your eyes met. His blue eyes narrowed at you and you stood up straight. You hated Bucky for putting the thought in your head. Now all you could think of was tackling Steve to the ground and fucking him senseless. You still wanted to beat him, but in a very different way.

As Steve entered, his eyes fixed to your form, you decided it was time to leave. After that fiasco in front of Tony, you didn’t think yourself capable of talking to Steve. Staying alone with him was something you didn’t trust yourself with. So you picked up your bag and started for the door when his voice stopped you.

“Running away? Am I to believe that there is something that finally scares you?”

Anger, red hot anger simmered under your veins when you turned to face him again. He had a mocking smirk on his face that made you grit your teeth. His eyes, dark and challenging beckoned you to him, but they didn’t hold resentment there either. Something between you had changed today. The very air around you was different, thick with tension and apprehension that had your nerves tingling.

“Scared?” You scoffed, dropping your bag on the matted floor and walking until you stood right before him. He towered over you in height, but he’d never been able to actually look down at you. “Me, scared of you? You wish Rogers.”

One corner of his lips lifted up, and he put his hands on you. One hand hooked around your waist and pulled you closer, the other trailing a finger down the side of your face to your neck, following the path down your arm until his fingers intertwined with yours.

“Oh, I so do wish” He whispered and his lips met yours. You rose up on your toes, mashing your body against his and mapping the planes of his body with your palms. The smell of his sweat and soap surrounded you, your arms coming to hold him around the shoulders as he hitched you up so you could wrap your legs around him.

Like everything in your relationship, the kiss was explosive. You didn’t melt against each other like people do in books; you collided like two warring armies intent on conquering the other. You collided like night and day, basking your surroundings in the dawn and dusk of your lust. Steve took your bottom lip between his teeth and bit down, smiling as you shamelessly moaned.

“What do you say?” He asked, pushing you against the wall, his hardness digging between the heated center of your legs.

You pulled him closer, letting your lips trail over his jaw and neck before you branded him with a quick bite. “You’ve always been so aggressive Steve, let’s see you let loose some other way. I sure do hope you fuck better than you fight though, or I’ll just be disappointed.”

Steve growled, kissing you again as he ground his cock against you, trapping you between the wall and his hard body that prevented any escape. Your hands slipped under his t-shirt, meeting the firm muscles on his abdomen that rippled under you. He pulled back just enough to allow you to remove your clothes, his own being flung sideways without any care.

Even before, you’d never thought of Steve as anything but beautiful, but now, seeing him in all his glory, you could only look him up and down in appreciation. He was trembling slightly, as if holding himself back with effort, his eyes not leaving you for a second. You both looked at each other, naked and unashamed before frantically coming together. His hands were everywhere, squeezing your ass and thighs as his lips pulled at your breast.

Your fingers rolled his nipples softly until he moaned, and then you pinched them. He jerked under your touch, kicking the back of your knees so you collapsed down, and he covered your body with his. Anger, arousal, lust and longing, all emotions built together in a storm of incoherent desire that had you both rolling over each other, fighting for dominance and power. Steve pinned you down with effort, holding your wrists in one hand over your head as he gave a smug smile to you.

“Will you finally surrender today?” He asked, positioning his cock at your entrance that was drenched. You would have loved to taste him, to have him taste you, but as of now, all you wanted was for him to slide inside you. You hungered for him, burnt for his touch. For years you’d been left wanting, and now with the prize so near, you weren’t about to wait any longer.

“The only surrender today will be yours.” You whispered sweetly before slamming your head against his. Steve jerked hard in surprise, allowing you the opportunity to free your hands and roll over him. You sat on his pelvis proudly, his throbbing member right underneath you and as he blinked at you, stunned, you rose up over his tip and slowly sunk down.

Steve groaned as your wet channel fell like velvet heat along his shaft. You had never been so full before. He stretched your limits, as he had always done, and you decided you very much preferred rendering him speechless like this under you than your usual punches and throws. His hands dug into your waist, helping you bounce on his cock and you threw your head back at the feeling.

It was a beautiful ache, one that took your breath away. As you rolled your hips and clenched down there, Steve’s voice rose in appreciation and you grinned. You finally had the golden boy at your mercy. You fucked him, changing your pace to punish him, never letting him up. For every time he killed you, you bit on his lips and neck, marking him. It was punishment and cherishing, a culmination of feelings you didn’t understand.

“Touch me.” You brokenly said, and his fingers found your nub. The slapping of skin, the sounds of debauchery and the smell of sin filled the air. You leaned over him to meet his lips, the heat in your gut bubbling until you snapped and came atop him, falling blissfully. It was one moment of weakness and the world titled, Steve having finally pushing you on your back.

“You’ve always been strong, because I’d hate to break you when the fun has only just begun.” He said and thrust into you hard and fast. He was an animal in heat, a man possessed, and you didn’t mind one bit. You met his every thrust with a raise of your hips, you clawed at his back until he bled, your lips tasting of the salt of sweat and tears and desire. He brought you impossibly closer, looking right into your eyes as he took you.

For the life of you, you couldn’t look away. You couldn’t get enough of his grunts and moans, of the breathy whispers of your name that slipped between curses, of the way his lashes would flutter over the dark blues that kept your eyes captive. He had you completely in that moment, mind and body; and for some reason, his gaze felt infinitely more intimate than his cock that was currently spearing you open. You keened in pleasure, whimpering as he touched your overly sensitive clit and had you coming again.

A minute later, he twitched inside you, his warmth flooding your core and you sighed. You laid entangled and sweaty, both of you spent and tired and yet completely overtaken by the urge to be closer still. To think this is what you’d both missed for all these years.

“So, what do you say, still feeling aggressive?” Steve asked and you looked at him with a grin that you couldn’t have suppressed had you wanted to. Oh yes, some battles were never meant to end, but they sure could be altered to meet new demands.

“With you? Always.” You replied, kissing him deep until he couldn’t think of anything but you. “Just remember one thing.”

“Oh yeah, what?”

“I am still a better best friend to Bucky. I did fuck you to keep him happy after all.”

Steve frowned darkly and before you could blink, he was over you, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“I think this time I’d fuck some manners into you.”

“I think this time you should actually put your back into it. I did all the work before.” You taunted and he dived at you.

Meanwhile, in Tony Stark’s office

“Friday, what’s the score?” He asked smugly, offering Bucky the packet of blueberries. Bucky was sitting with his feet on the desk, a small smile on his face.

“I am afraid I am not at a liberty to say Boss.” Friday replied. If the AI could blush, she would.

“Seems like they are at an impasse.” Tony suggested, and Bucky shrugged, licking his lips.

“Well, some things never change.”

#steve rogers x reader #steve x reader #bucky x reader #Steve Rogers #Bucky Barnes #crack fic #i think lol

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letarasstuff · 3 years

Text

Can I stay with you?

(A/N): This is based on this, this and this post. I really hope you are ready for the feels, because they are there and they are heavy-

Summary: Following the events of Emily's death, how will Spencer and his daughter cope with it?

Warnings: Angst and lots of it, mentions of drug use, contemplations of drug use, mentions of needles, we also got some bittersweet fluff

Wordcount: 2.5k

✨Masterlist✨ _______________________________

A hospital is not a place where a child should be, Spencer knows that much. But he picked (Y/N) up on his way for two reasons:

The first one being the simple occurence that the babysitter is not able to keep her any longer, because she has classes in the next morning. The second one is selfish and the father knows that, but he needs her presence, the comfort she brings to him.

“Daddy”, the child breaks the silence in the waiting room, “Is Auntie Emily going to be ok?” She sits in his lap reading a book before looking up at him. Her eyes hold something he wishes to never see again: Fear. The fear of losing someone she loves dearly.

“I hope, Baby. But let’s not forget one important fact: Your Auntie Emily is one of the strongest women I know.” Spencer gives her a kiss on the top of her head and cuddles her closer to him, seeing (Y/N)’s eyes dropping. The rest of the team watches the interaction with aching hearts.

The girl is asleep for half an hour when JJ enters the room. Everybody gets up crowding her. Spencer is careful to not disturb his daughter as he moves her head to his shoulder and hooks his arm under her legs.

“She never made it off the table.” These words echo in the genius’ mind, seemingly being the only things he can think about. “I-I never had the chance to say goodbye.” JJ hugs him, trying to give some sort of comfort. In this process (Y/N) wakes up. As soon as she spots her father’s tears, she knows not to ask a question. Instead she loops her arms around his neck.

“It’s fine. It’s gonna be alright, Daddy”, the toddler recalls the words he says to her whenever she is upset in hopes to cheer him up.

The next couple days are hard on the whole team. They try to grieve together, especially while the funeral takes place. (Y/N) notices that the color black is fitting, since her Auntie really liked to wear it. She likes that they do the same to pay their respects that way.

“Auntie Penny, is she watching?” The blonde woman carries her while the casket is walked down the aisle. Since her death, (Y/N) doesn’t dare to say Emily’s name. She thinks if she avoids it, she is going to inflict less pain when she is talked about.

“Of course. Emily is in heaven and watches this beautiful beautiful ceremony we hold for her. So wipe that frown off and put on that smile she loved so much. Alright?” Confusing to her, the adults want (Y/N) to smile all the time. But they are frowning and crying more often than not.

“Can she hear us? Because I want to say I love her. I forgot to say it the last time I saw her.” Trying to distract herself from seeing the casket lowering into the grave, the girl plays with Penlope’s hair. She in turn has to fight tears back. Only now she realizes the impact the whole thing has on her.

“I’m sure she does. What about when the majority is gone, we go to her grave and talk to Emily? Do we have a deal?” (Y/N) nods.

As soon as the ceremony is over, Spencer takes his daughter, cradling her close to him. As if she senses his sadness, the girl is petting his back in a comforting way. He squeezes her closer to him, leaving her not much room to breathe.

“Daddy, I wanna talk to her. I need to get down.” (Y/N) wiggles in his grasp after she whispers this into his ear. Reluctantly Spencer lets her down and she toddles over to the freshly made grave. A little plastic card sticks out of the grass in place of a headstone.

The adults try to give her as much space as possible, they have to let grieve on her own.

“Hey, Auntie Emily. I-I wanted to say I love you, and I forgot to tell you this the last time so I say it a second time. I love you. And I miss you. I think Daddy misses you too. He is sad since you are gone. I’m too. I think it’s because we miss you. But I hope you like Heaven. Maybe you see my Mommy. When you do, can you say I love her?

“I’ll try to see you soon, Auntie. Goodbye!” (Y/N) goes back to her father and makes grabby hands towards him. Gladly Spencer picks her up again, putting a kiss on her head. “Wanna go home, Daddy.” The child mumbles, exhausted by all the stress and emotions from the day.

The father is relieved to have an excuse to skip the meal with the team. He is scared that the evening at the little restaurant is clouded by sadness and angst. Spencer doesn’t need that right now, a nice sit in with his daughter sounds way better.

After saying their goodbyes the little family sits in the car on their way to the apartment. As soon as Spencer starts the car, (Y/N) is fast asleep. He looks at her through the rear view mirror, happy to see her at peace. It gives the father time to sort through his own thoughts. Since Emily’s death (Y/N) tries to be around him constantly, which he is thankful for, because she keeps the darkness away.

Her last hours play again and again before his eyes. The different ways he could have stopped all of this. Why didn’t he say more when she began biting her nails? When she said “Laura Reynolds is dead”? Maybe all of this is his fault?

His forearm begins to itch. Exactly where Tobias Hankel injected the needle same as he did several times. Maybe, maybe it would make everything better? Just this one tim-

“Daddy? When are we home?” The small voice cuts off his train of thought. Spencer needs a few seconds to clear his mind. Did he really think that? Taking dilaudid while the reason he fought his addiction literally sits right behind him? “Just a few minutes, Sweetheart. Do you want to go to bed after dinner?”

As if she knows that the father can’t be left alone in this state, (Y/N) answers: “No, I wanna watch a movie with you. Can we watch Alvin and the chipmunks? I love Simon so much!” This places a smile on his face, the excitement in her eyes scare his dark thoughts away. “Sure, Peanut. We can watch whatever you want.”

It's the fourth evening in a row that the girl sleeps in her father’s bed. She either falls asleep there or climbs next to him in the middle of the night, so he figures he lets her sleep there right away.

“Good night, Sweetheart”, he tells her as they lay down. Even though it’s quite early for Spencer to go to bed it’s (Y/N)’s time. “Good night, Daddy”, she tells him while snuggling closer, “I love you. Soooooo much.”

The young doctor decides to take the next few days off from work in order to work through the events. The first one he spends coloring in books with her the whole day. While she works on her own books gifted by various members of the BAU, Spencer has his own extra made for adults. He can’t deny the soothing effect it has on him. The repeating moves calms the storm of thoughts inside his head.

The next day the two of them sit the whole day on the small couch in the living room, (Y/N) on his lap, and read. Sometimes they read for themselves, others the father reads outloud from his own or (Y/N) from her own. It’s kind of therapeutic to hear his child doing something he enjoyed his whole life.

“Daddy, do you think she feels lonely in heaven? There is nobody she knows, she has to wait for us to follow her, doesn’t she?” Not prepared for such a deep question, Spencer is caught off guard.

He clears his throat before answering. “Uh, Auntie Emily isn’t that lonely up there, you know. You can’t remember him, but Uncle Gideon, a friend from work and someone I looked up to, is there. He surely greeted her with open arms, happy to see her. And your Mommy is also there, she certainly asked lots of questions about you.” “A-are you sure? I told her to say Mommy ‘I love you’ when she sees her.” (Y/N) looks up to her father with big eyes.

He is not sure if he is lying right now to her, but he sees that his daughter needs the reassurance. “Yes, I’m sure.” To lighten the mood he begins to tickle her, which ends in a tickle fight which in turn ends in tiring the girl out and falling asleep while watching a Disney movie.

The next day is by far the worst since it all happened. Both (Y/N) and Spencer haven’t slept much due to nightmares from both sides (him comforting her as she tears him from his own), which results in a grumpy toddler and a non stop coffee drinking adult.

“Sweetheart, you need to put that shirt on. Auntie JJ is expecting us in ten minutes. Please, stop fighting me”, he begs, but she continues to cry. As Spencer tries for a third time to put it on her (Y/N) throws herself to the other side of the bed.

“I don’t want that, Daddy!” She finally gets out through her sobs. Spencer halts in his movements. “Why? That’s your favorite, Baby.” While (Y/N) begins to cry louder, he leaves the clothing article on the bed and gathers her in his arm, rocking her back and forth additionally to whispering sweet reassurances in her ear.

“She gave it to me. I don’t wanna make it dirty or ruin it”, the toddler says between shaky breaths. For what feels like the trillionth time, the young agent’s heart breaks over this statement. He has a bigger vocabulary than the average English speaking person, but at this moment Spencer is at a loss of words.

“Sweetheart, I apologize for not acknowledging this right away. I’ll get another shirt out for you, ok? Thank you so much for telling and helping me.” Just a few minutes later the little family is on their way to the next metro stop. It’s then that Spencer realizes his day won’t be any easier.

“(Y/N) you can sit in the seat next to me like you always do. Why do you have to sit in my lap today?” Normally he isn’t someone who denies his child physical contact, but the seating chart has a logical purpose. Being on a train with a child means you have some kind of luggage with you, which leads to occupying a four seats compartment. In order to prevent somebody taking the seat next to him, Spencer places his daughter there. It’s a win win situation for everybody, really.

Unfortunately for him (Y/N) is extra clingy today and won’t stop crawling onto his lap. With a sigh he accepts his defeat and tries not to think about the amount of germs that fly around.

Another problem that torments the father: Over the last few days his cravings grew. Especially today the feeling, the need, for another shot and another high is undeniable for him. As if sensing this (Y/N) sticks by his side throughout the whole time, keeping his mind off of the drug that changes him.

While they are at the Jareau’s and Lamontagne’s household, his daughter refuses to play with Henry. “I wanna stay with you”, she murmurs into his shoulder. Again Spencer accepts his defeat and sits down on the couch next to his best friend.

“Sweetheart, you need to let me go. I have to go to the bathroom, you can’t come with me.” This is followed by a tsunami of tears. While JJ tries to console her, he slips out of the room discreetly.

Due to (Y/N)’s current grumpiness and Spencer’s fatigue they quickly call it a night, even though he could use some more comfort from his friends.

“Good night, Sweetheart. Sleep tight and dream nice. I love you”, he says after tucking his child in and giving her a kiss on the forehead. “Night night, Daddy. I love you, too”, her small voice echoes back to him and makes him smile softly.

Spencer finds his way back to the living room and sits down with a book in his lap. As expected he doesn’t get much reading done, too distracted by his own thoughts. The events of the night of his colleague’s, his friend’s, death replay themselves over and over again.

What if he made his conclusions faster? He is supposed to be the smart one, the one the team relies on for making important connections. But he failed once so who knows what happens when he fails again? Next time it could be the whole team dying. He could die. He would leave (Y/N) alone with the team gone. His mother isn’t capable of caring for her and his father doesn’t even know she exists. She will go into foster care, into a home with too many kids. She will be looked over, too small to be seen. Her potential will go to waste and she will never achieve anything she is capable of. And all that because he hasn’t made a conclusion fast enough.

Spencer’s scars on his forearm itch worse than ever. One shot. Only one shot to make the thoughts go away. To make the guilt go away, the bad feelings. He needs it. He needs to cure himself from the symptoms of being a human.

Before the young doctor even registers what he is doing he already put his jacket on and looks for his wallet when a voice startles him.

“Daddy, i can't sleep. Can I stay with you again?” (Y/N) stands in the doorway, clutching her stuffed animal and her blanket, shielding her eyes from the light, oblivious to what her father was about to do.

“Oh Darling, of course. Do you want me to read to you? Or we drink hot chocolate and watch a movie?” He suggests, ready to distract himself from anything that’s going on in his mind. A few minutes later his daughter cuddles into his side while watching once again Alvin and the Chipmunks.

Spencer is just happy to have his light in his life all the time and is ready to tackle any task to keep her there, may it be once again the weekly visits for anonymous narcotics or time off from work to process the events together in therapy.

Taglist:

All works:

@agentshortstacc

Criminal Minds:

@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl

Spencer Reid x child!reader:

@ilovetaquitosmmmm

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x daughter!reader #spencer reid x child!reader #spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfiction #fanfiction #x reader #reader insert #x daughter!reader #x child!reader

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yesimwriting · 3 years

Text

Searing Starlight (chapter two)

A/n Chapter twooo!! I cannot believe the support I’ve been getting on here im so excited to share my six of crows/shadow and bone fics with y’all!

Lmk if you’d like to be tagged when I update this story!! And just letting y’all know I take requests so if you have an idea you’d like to see me attempt feel free to comment it or send it in :))

At least Kaz’s claimed ‘wraith’ (which is such an odd thing to just have) is a girl, and a seemingly kind one at that. She was quick to find me, body pressed into wooden shelves and glass bottles, and subtly gesture for me to follow her. It had been difficult to keep track of her flighty form through the crowd, but I think there was a point in her strange raveling, to make sure no one was following me.

She’s not particularly talkative, but she doesn’t seem bothered by me. She tossed me a random oversized shirt to pull over my dress when she saw how I kept adjusting the fabric and crossing my arms. That was kinder than she needed to be. I think I’ll like her.

“So you’re a wraith,” I manage, breaking the nervous silence, “Like a full time, constantly on-call wraith.”

The question seems to puzzle her, dark eyebrows drawing together. “Yes.” The corner of her mouth twitches up slightly, a smile. “A full time, constantly on-call wraith.” She hesitates, perfect stance adjusting. “What were you doing before?”

Great. This question. “Nothing important.” It’s not a fair cop-out. Especially since she answered my question. “I um...I’m indentured to Rollan Kenya.”

I watch her reaction to the name. Some know of him. Some revere him. Some loathe him and everything he’s associated with. “His religious interpretations are controversial.”

“If you think what he says to the public is bad you should hear what he says in private.” I push myself further into the chair I’m in.

Something strange flickers over her features. “I can imagine.”

Shaking my head, I hope I’m ending this conversation. “What’s your name?”

A hesitation. “Inej.”

I nod once, “I’m y/n.”

“Do you need water, y/n?”

I scratch my still exposed knee. “That’d be nice. Thank you.”

She’s quick to leave, feet making no noise. A minute later she returns with a cup. I have no reason to suspect her, but I still sniff the cup before taking a cautious sip. I wonder if Anya made it back home. I wonder if she’s worse off for it.

Before I can fall into a pit of debating despair, the door to the room Inej took me to squeaks open. On instinct, I snap my gaze towards the door, tensing. The first person I notice is Kaz, entering the room with a determination too intense for this time of night. Jesper is quick to follow, and I drop my stare. I’ve never had to interact with anyone I’ve lied to after taking their money.

“Are they gone?” Inej asks, clearly accustomed to such brooding tension.

Kaz nods once, “It took too much convincing--the Inferni’s more than she’s letting on.”

I’m literally in the room. “I’m not--we’ve spoken two words to each other, sorry my abilities didn’t come up.”

He turns towards me with a deadly grace. My grip on the cup tightens. What the hell is wrong for me? How deeply instilled is that god complex Kenya wanted in me? It must be as part of me as my name if I felt comfortable enough to speak that way to Kaz Brekker.

I keep my eyes on his cane, waiting for some kind of physical retaliation. “Maybe the grisha hunting you would appreciate your sense of humor more.”

It’s a bluff. He needs me. He’s desperate for something that can mimic a Sun Summoner. Still though, I’m not in the mood to poke a bear with a stick. “Speaking from experience,” I clear my throat awkwardly, “They tend not to.”

“Then I suggest you begin explaining before I decide I’d rather take my chances and you lose your worth.”

Maybe if I hadn’t spent the last eleven years of my life with Kenya, his words would haunt me. I keep my expression set, but the lanterns in the room flicker. “It’s not as impressive as they’re making it seem--Inferni can produce fire, regular, red, bright fire.” I pause, feeling energy in my palms. “I can do the same, but I can also,” I extend a flat palm, “Do this.”

I focus my energy on restraint, forcing the fire on my skin to remain there, covering my palms in a cold, blue glow. “It’s still fire, just blue--and that matters to them because blue light is the only kind you can use in the Fold.” Do they know anything about the fold? “Kenya, the man I’m indentured to, believes that this ability makes me eligible for Sainthood. He specializes in collecting people he thinks are eligible for Sainthood.” The low flame coating my palm licks upwards as I remember what disappointing Kenya means. “And if you don’t meet his standards, he’ll find a way to make sure you do. That’s why the grisha want me. He made me more and they believe that if they give me to someone who can give me an amplifier I’ll be able to produce enough blue light to protect an entire fleet.”

“What do you mean ‘he’ll find a way to make sure you do’?” Inej’s voice is cautious. An attempt to be respectful.

I drop my palm, letting the fire disappear into nothingness. “I wasn’t born with the ability to control the blue light so well--It’s difficult enough to produce for longer than two seconds let alone keep it from burning everything in sight. By the time I ended up in Kenya’s control he had learned that certain stimulants. Some scientists are working on a more grisha-targeted kind, but Kenya has managed to work with the generic well enough.” Hands shaking, I wipe the condensation off the side of the cup and hold out my wrist. Using the condensation, I begin to wipe at my wrist and forearm, smearing my makeup and revealing the needle bruises. “The key is withdrawals.”

Thoughts of begging Kenya, crying and screaming for another fix as he promised to give me that as soon as I showed some control of my abilities, make the shaking in my hand worse. I clasp my hands together, squeezing them in hopes of hiding the signs of withdrawal.

I stare at the ground, not wanting to take anyone’s reaction in. I handle pity as well as I handle kindness.

“Do you think you could produce enough blue light for one ship?”

Looking up, I take in Kaz’s measured expression. I’m glad he’s sticking to business. I’d rather that than deal with unpacking all of that with a group of strangers that don’t care if I live or die.

“I could try.” I’ve never tried to protect anything that large. “Even if I can, it doesn’t mean a voyage like that will be safe.”

“There’s no real safety in the Fold,” he replies easily. Realistic expectations. That will make this easier. “No one finds out about her--especially not Pekka Rollins.”

I pull my arm towards my body, glad for the opportunity to hide the bruises. Signs of my weakness. The worst part was always the way Kenya would speak to me after. Pathetic. Weak. Trapped within the restraints of my flesh.

“Who’s Pekka Rollins?”

Kaz briefly turns his head in my direction. “No one that will ever concern you.” He ignores my annoyed huff. “We’ll use the Inferni to get to Alina Starkov.”

Alina. Alina Starkov. “What do you want with Alina?”

At that, the room seems to drain. I feel weirder than when they were seeing my abilities.

“You know her?” Jesper’s surprise reveals more than Kaz wants him to. I don’t miss the glare he receives.

I half-shrug. “We were in the same orphanage for awhile.”

“How did you get to Ketterdam?” I don’t trust Kaz’s urgency.

“I don’t remember, I was a child and I--I hit my head that night I think. I just woke up and I was with Kenya.”

“How well do you know Alina?”

There was a point in time in which she was my best friend. We learned how to braid hair by practicing on each other, we would draw maps together, and I was the only one who knew about her crush on Mal. “Not that well.”

He takes a step forward, eyes almost squinting. The touch of distrust is evident on his face. “If you’re lying I’ll find out.”

I owe Alina at least this. “Well then it’s a good thing I’m not.”

I’m not naive enough to believe that I’ve convinced him, but his intense gaze does not remain on me. I’m relieved when his attention is off of me, but he’s only moving on to start planning the riskiest thing I’ve ever done.

Taglist: @ambrosia-v-black

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dokifluffs · 3 years

Text

Can You Hold Me | Miya Atsumu

Pairing: Atsumu X Reader (gender neutral)

Genre: angst to fluffy comforttt, a little of frenemies to lovers? I tried, college

Author’s Note: Y/N was literally how I felt recently and I wanted this, and I still want this so badlyyy

Warnings: anxiety!

The wind blew through the street, making all the branches whip violently through the air as dark clouds rolled through the sky, the rumbling sound of thunder creeping closer and closer

But the rain was already here. It poured down, washing through the streets, leaving nothing dry

What seemed like streams of rain water washed past your feet in the curb as the flooding water flowed down the storm drain as cold pellets of water splashed your face with every step closer

The rain washed over the house, dimming the interior in contrast to the normal sunlight, brightening every room in the house

Atsumu lounged about the old, worn down leather couch of the living room, the only light coming artificially from his phone as it illuminated his face as he scrolled through social media and emails

The sound of the rain coming down on the house as well as the lollipop he moved around his mouth filled his ears, almost making him unable to hear the subtlest knock on the front door

He paused his scrolling for a moment, holding the lollipop still in his cheek as he sat up, the leathery furniture whining beneath his movements

And then he heard it again - the light knocking of the door

He clicked off his phone and tucked the device into his great sweatpants pockets as he peeked out the peephole, opening the door in confusion as he saw you

“What’re ya doin’ here?” He opened the door wider, eyes wide as he looked at you standing in the rain. “Get in here,” he practically pulled you in, curiosity growing more and more as to why you were here in the first place

You stepped into the house, out of the cold rain as he shut the door behind you with a firm bang, the lock clicking in place

“‘Samu ain’t home,” he looked down your body, seeing how wet you were, small puddles of rain water dripping off your coat that did basically did nothing to keep you dry as he saw

“Are ya crazy or something?” He prodded at you, his usual sarcastic and teasing tone in his voice as he leaned on the wall, his muscular arms folded over his chest as he wore a white, oversized, sleeveless tank top, the sides cut low that purposefully showed off his toned abdomen

But as quick as his teasing and joking side appeared, it disappeared seeing as you didn’t make your usual witty comeback within seconds

He didn’t miss the way you trembled, seeing you stand so awkwardly and so out of place as if this was your first time here when it wasn’t, how you practically gasped for air as you breathed unsteadily

“I-I’m sorry for coming s-so unexpectedly,” your voice sounded so fragile as you kept your eyes down, unable to look up

Your heart hammered rapidly in your chest, a slight wheeze to your breathing

Your thoughts raced so fast in your head, it felt like you were standing on the edge of a cliff- so close to falling into the sea of numbness

“Don’t worry ‘bout it…” Atsumu’s voice was different than his usual, semi-mocking tone with you but you couldn’t even tell as the room began to spun just the slightest, your head going fuzzy

Your relationship with Atsumu wasn’t the best or favorable compared to Osamu

Personally, the two of you didn’t even know if you could call each other “friends” since it had been tease after tease after tease ever since the two of you met

If anything, that was what allowed you and Osamu to get so close in the first place: the jokes about Atsumu

“Hey, what’s with you?” He stepped closer as the heel of his slippers dragged over the wooden floor

Without touching you, he leaned down, trying to meet your eyes

He felt his body freeze for a second seeing as they were filled with water yet he couldn’t tell if they were from the rain or if they were your tears but he assumed the latter

“I di- I didn’t want to be home al-alone…” you fiddled with your fingers as you mustered up the courage to lift your head, but your eyes still avoided him. “C-can I stay here, please?”

Atsumu looked down to you, confused as to what he should even say considering he had never seen you like this before - heck, he didn’t even think Osamu even saw you like this

You were usually so quick with responses, able to take jabs at one another

But that part of you was nowhere to be seen in Atsumu’s eyes

“Sure, come with me.” He led you down the hall, pushing a door open to reveal a bedroom, somewhat messy but similar to your own bedroom at home

You stood awkwardly at the door, not wanting to step, opting to look around the unfamiliar bedroom until Atsumu was back in front of you

“Here, you’re soaked.” He handed you a pair of black sweatpants and a darkish red long sleeve, stepping out of the room and back toward the living room

“Are these yours?” Your voice was still quiet when you turned, your body trembling from the cold at this point

“They ain’t ‘Samu’s. He locks his door now since I ‘borrow’ too many things without givin’ ‘em back, as he says,” he plopped back down nonchalantly on the couch where all you could see were his slippers as he played with them on his feet

You took the clothes and went into the bathroom down the hall beside Osamu’s bedroom, his door closed as Atsumu had said

“Yo ‘samu, your friend is here, come get them,” Atsumu sent the text to his twin only for no response

You set the clothes down on the corner of the counter as you stood on the towel, not wanting to get anything else wet

Your undergarment(s) was/were for the most part dry surprisingly

The clothes were big and baggy on you but they were comfy

You took a good look at yourself in the mirror, the guilt you thought you escaped from your house was suddenly back in your head, clear as day

It felt like there was a pit inside of you that you couldn’t get away from or fill was beginning to dwell inside, its stay long overdue now

Your breathing began to quicken as you stood, your eyes slowly casting downward as pins and needles pricked in your hands and feet, tingling them

The feeling of doing something wrong, being here- it all felt wrong and it all felt like your fault

You knees began to grow shaky as you gripped onto the porcelain counter for balance, only to feel that the counter wasn’t cool to the normal touch

Your hands began to shake as your legs grew weaker and weaker until you sunk to the ground as the intensity of the pins and needles grew more and more with every passing second

“What’s takin’ so long?” Atsumu mumbled to himself as he realized how long he had been on his phone, the message to his brother sent almost ten minutes ago by now which was around the time you went to change

He glanced by his open bedroom, of course not seeing you

“You okay?” He knocked on the bathroom door, hearing the subtle rain outside as well as your jagged breathing and muffled whimpers

“Y/N?” He jiggled the doorknob, finding it unlocked. “I’m comin’ in,” he announced, strangely seeing no one when the door opened

That is until he looked down

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he pushed the door open, pushing your wet clothes on the floor to the wall between the door as he knelt down beside you, tears falling from your face as you struggled to breathe

“My hands are stuck, I can’t move my hands,” you cried, your panic continuously growing for the loss of control over your hands

“Hey, shh, don’t cry, you’re gonna be alright. Let’s move ya first, alright?” He enclosed his hands over your wrist as he tried to help you up

It felt like Atsumu was on edge seeing you like this: so broken and vulnerable, a side he never imagined he would ever see from someone who, as “annoying” as he found you, lingered in his mind longer and longer after every interaction he had with you

“I can’t move my legs,” you felt so helpless and useless, your thoughts incoherent as they only raced faster, your heart hammering fast in your chest

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry-“ you folded over yourself, struggling to breathe, wanting this empty pit feeling to be gone, for the holes inside of you to disappear

“Hey, shhh, it’s alright, it ain’t your fault,” he rubbed a small circle over your back, leaning down close to the floor to get on your level. “I’m gonna carry ya, okay?”

He knelt closer to your body as he brought his arms under your body, slowly lifting you into his embrace, leaving the cold tiled floor of the bathroom and straight into his bedroom

He lowered you down onto his bed, the springs creaking under both your combined weights as he sat you in between with his legs

“M-My hands,” you felt so helpless, so vulnerable

All the control you thought you had over yourself was slipping right out of your fingertips as you trembled violently in Atsumu’s arms on his bed

“Shh, I know.. Let’s ground ya, alright?” His words came out slower and gentler, almost sounding exactly like Osamu yet there was still something different about it that you could hear, that you could feel

He watched you carefully with his hands lingering beneath your legs and around your lower back from when he carried you

It felt like you were drowning, like the space around you was closing in, that every bit of your body was screaming at you that you were wrong

“Okay,” he proceeded as you nodded your head once, as your hands trembled violently. “Y/N, take deep breaths,” his voice was low as he spoke calmly. “Breathe in…” he waited until you did the same to the best of your abilities. “Breathe out…” he let out his own breath, again, observing you as you did the same

“Again. In… and out..” He repeated this with you until your breathing improved, slowly getting stronger and stronger

“Tell me three things ya feel right now, Y/N,” he pulled you closer as he enclosed one of his hands over your own, feeling how cold they were to his touch

“I- I can f-feel.. Your war-warmth..” You gasped for air lightly, your breathing still not at its peak but at least the suffocating feeling was dissipating

“Good, what else?”

“The bed… a-and the clothes…”

“Okay, now tell me three things ya hear.”

He sat and spoke, holding you so patiently in his embrace, he couldn’t think or focus on anything or anyone else but you

“Your voice… and- and the rain-“ just as you peeked around him outside to the window, a booming crack of thunder sounded, making you jump as you moved your head back, averting your eyes from the window

“I got ya, you’re okay.” He rubbed his hand in slow, steady circles on your lower back, pulling you impossibly closer

“You can hear my voice and the rain. What’s one more thing you can hear?”

You still felt so uneasy but you slowly began to regain the slightest feeling in your hands as pins and needles tickled your hand

“Your heart…” you breathed out

“Good. You’re doin’ alright,” he looped his arm around your back, taking one of your hand in his own as he began to massage them. “Continue breathin’” he spoke as he did this

Your breathing hitched every now and then as you leaned against his chest, the warm sensation coming back to your hands after soft massages

The sound of rain as the thunder distanced itself filled the silence as the two of you sat in the dimmed room, your occasional sniffles and gasps breaking the silence

“What got ya so anxious?” He asked as he set your hand back down your lap, standing from the bed, grabbing tissues, handing the box to you

You plucked a few, doing your best tot surpress the guilt that began to cumulate once again

“School,” you sighed, tucking your knees closer to your body as you sat on his bed on the plush covers

“Is the L/N Y/N finally falling behind? Or no-“ he dramatically gasped, prodding at you with his usual antics to try to see that smile of yours. “Failing?”

“No,” you sniffled, but your voice was harder than before. It was sort of working

“I’m just- I’m over working myself and I haven’t seen anyone else in days,” your voice cracked

“Why don’t ya take breaks?”

“Cause I don’t let myself. Every time I do, I just feel guilty, and even now, just being here, I feel so guilty, like I’m doing the wrong thing, I’m not being productive enough”

Panic began to settle in as you sat there, all the stress from these few weeks of school, one heavy week after the other and there was no one at home to help you through it

Not even your parents as they were gone to work by the time you woke up, only seeing them around dinner before you went back to your room, continuing more work

Atsumu sat backwards in his desk chair, listening intently before he stood from his seat, plopping himself on the edge of his bed instinctively

Wanting to be closer to you

You kept your red eyes down as the areas around your eyes swelled

But looking closer, he could see the bags under your eyes

You fiddled with your shaky fingers, playing with the edge of the sleeves of his shirt you wore, wishing for more time

Time to relax, to do your work, to eat, enjoy life

But ever since school started up again, it felt like a clear punch to the gut and a black hole developed in your chest, eating away at the things that made you feel okay and stable

You couldn’t enjoy yourself anymore

“Can you hold me, please?” You pinched at the side of the thin fabric tank top he wore, your eyes and demeanor so childlike in his eyes, there was something about the way you were right now, it made him want to protect you

It took him a bit as he processed your words, the way you looked, how broken you were, realizing how fast his heart was beating for you now

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Sure”

The springs inside the mattress creaked once again as he laid down closer to the edge so you had as much room as possible beside him between his body and the wall

The mattress sunk around his body comfortably as you pressed your sleeve covered hands over your eyes, drying your tears, stifling your sniffles

He laid an arm down, his fingertips brushing the cool wall for your head as he watched you lay down slowly as if you were a delicate flower, laying close beside him, nuzzling against the warmth he emanated

The two of you laid awkwardly together

You couldn’t even relax into his body knowing how awkward it really was

“What’s got ya so worked up over?” He asked, breaking the silence as he stared up at the ceiling, waiting for you to fully relax since he could barely feel your body against his, aside from your head

“School…” you pushed out with a sigh

“Seriously?” He asked out of pure curiosity

This took atsumu aback since you were one of those people he knew for being on top of their work, someone in school where others held this image where they could ask you for help with anything

And to now see you so broken over something others were so sure you would thrive

“Are you fallin’ behind or somethin’?” He reached the arm you laid on, rubbing your shoulder as he laid still beside you, his other arm draped over his abdomen

“No, it’s not that, I’m just-“ you stopped to take in a breath, gathering your words. “I’m working myself too hard and I feel so.. lonely,” your voice grew softer as your voice cut out at the end but he heard you clearly

“I’ve been shutting myself in my room for too long and it feels like I can’t enjoy anything without feeling guilty…”

Your tears were hot as they cascaded over the bridge of your nose, past your other eye and into the fabric of Atsumu’s tank top

“Guilty about what? Of course you’re gonna be burned out if you constantly work. Why don’t ya take breaks?”

“That’s the thing,” you sat up, looking down at him, your voice sounded so dejected as it softly bounced around the room

“Whenever I do, I feel like I’m wasting time,” your voice cracked as you sniffled

The words hurt so much as they came out

Even sitting here in the presence of Atsumu, someone who was always like a pleasant thorn in your side, felt wrong

But you needed this so much - to be with someone, to hear their breathing, their voice, even the sound of someone moving around in the kitchen was enough

“I miss people, ‘Tsumu,” you sighed as hot tears cascaded down your dry face, dripping off your chin to his shirt you wore

You didn’t even care, let alone realize that you had called him ‘Tsumu like his brother had

“I want to feel okay again,” you broke as you pressed your palms to your eyes, the pins and needle feeling slowly prickling in the palm of your hands again

You felt the wave after wave of guilt and pathetic-ness crash through your body

It was only school, only about a month in and here you were

You had never felt so broken before, it felt so-

Two arms wrapped around your body, squeezing you close

The rain tapped on the glass as you nuzzled into his embrace not wanting this warmth to disappear, this scent, the sound of this heart beat

You wanted the person who was always at your side, never missing a beat to say something to you

“I hate this feeling, it feels so wrong inside of me,” you turned your face into his chest, holding onto this feeling of someone beside you

“You’re not alone,” his voice low and quiet, rumbling through his chest as he spoke, his hand secure on your upper arm, another stroking down your back before his fingers found its place at the base of your head

“There’re gonna be some heavy weeks and some light weeks, you got me?” He rest his chin on top of your head as he fell back into the mattress, still holding you

You practically laid on top of him as he tangled his leg with yours

“Breaks are good for ya,” he looked down to you, your red, teary eyes as you laid with your cheek pressed to his chest, your hand covered by his sleeve over your mouth and nose as you took deep, steady breaths again

“And if I find out that you’re not takin’ breaks, I’m gonna drag you out your room,” he brought his hand to your cheek, rubbing your tears away so your face was no longer wet

“You’re gonna be alright, I’m gonna make sure of it…” he paused until he realized his words, his true emotions for you beginning to slip out

“Cause I can’t poke fun at a crybaby,” he playfully scoffed

You repeated his words in your head, nodding along slowly as atsumu spoke words of encouragement, asking you about your week, talking through your next assignments

All to calm you back down

As the time passed, your worries slowly decreased in size but the hole was still there

Just smaller

he made sure to repeat hid words, his strokes and grazes on your body never stopping so you didn’t have to feel alone anymore

cause you weren’t

The room grew dimmer and dimmer as it got later and later

With the sound of jingling keys, the front door opened

Osamu tossed his keys to the couch, setting his backpack leaning against the side of it as he slipped out of his shoes, noticing yours was still there

Yet the house was silent

The only thing that could really be heard was the white static of the rain as it came to a steady shower ever since this afternoon

He pulled out his phone, the screen illuminating his face as he sat in the arm, looking back to his messages

“Tsk, I literally gave you one job, ‘ Tsum,” Osamu grumbled to himself noticing how there was no rice being made in the cooker as Osamu had messaged atsumu a few hours ago

The message was delivered, yet unread

With a huff, he pushed himself off of the arm of the couch, walking down the dark hall, approaching the slightly ajar bedroom door of his twin brother

Osamu nudged the door open with his foot but before he could nag his brother, he stood paused at the open door

The light for the streetlamp shined in, illuminating your bodies on the bed as Atsumu slept with one arm draped around your abdomen, legs tangled beneath the sheets that covered the lower halves of your body, using his other arm as his pillow so you could sleep on his pillow

You slept facing his chest, your hand holding onto his shirt

“‘Bout time,” Osamu smirked to himself as he shut the door silently

He had been wondering how long it would take for the two of you to finally get together and now he had his answer

All of high school and just a few months into college

~~~~~ Thanks for reading! Masterlist for more! Please do not repost anywhere else!

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valeskakingdom · 3 years

Note

since we were talking about candy in the groupchat, what about jerome and reader being at the circus or a festival and reader insisting on trying every candies and snacks? or maybe that would be jerome? haha (of course, ignore if you want to! :))

No it's alright! I think I do it before Jerome became crazy tho. Still I think I mention the abusive relationship and the big hatred Jerome feels for her. Get ready for a little surprise ahaha!

This time it's a very short one tho (my opinion)

Credit: @daily-joker

Jerome x Reader

Warnings: short mention of violence and abuse, otherwise none

Word count: 2139

It was 4ish in the afternoon.

You were excited - finally you see your lover again: the ginger circus boy Jerome Valeska. He meant everything to you, you couldn't without him. In your opinion you and him had almost the perfect relationship. You've never argued, you supported each other, helped each other... It was magical. Both of you, Jeromeor you, could never think it. You and arguing? About what? There was nothing to argue about. You know he would never cheat on you, nor would you. Your feelings for each other were way to strong.

But yes, as you've heard - your relationship was almost perfect.

The crux of the matter were your habits. You lived in a small apartment near the Narrows with a non exciting view to the outside - you just saw damaged houses, trash filled the streets, and just a few people walked outside.

And Jerome - he lived at the circus. Always travelling, always far away from you. Just at the beginning of spring you were able to see him, otherwise you were required to send letters - and you did it, day by day until you both knew everything about each other. You knew, he didn't like the circus - mainly because of his mother Lila Valeska, the snake dancer. In your opinion, she was a whore who abused his own flesh and blood. She was beating Jerome, yelling and punishing him for nothing. It made you cry, thinking your love of your life was living in such horrible conditions. Several times you offered him to live with him but he always declined. He said if he left his mum would find him and kill him. Then you offered him to move to the circus but even that he declined. He said he couldn't forgive himself if his mother laid a finger on you - kind of understandable.

***

You made your way quick to the circus. You didn't want to waste your time, you couldn't wait any longer to see you. You wanted to hug him, kiss the shit outta him, wanted to smell on his cologne that smelled like a mix of candies and the classy men perfume. It satisfied all your senses, you were literally addicted to it.

After you quickly parked in front of the circus, you made your way fast to enter it. You didn't even need to buy a ticket, every artist knew you as Jerome pretty little doll. That was the nickname he usually gave you when he was non stop talking about you.

On the entrance, you saw the Ringmaster seemingly looking for something. His head permanently moved from one side to another and he had a questioning look on his face. It changed though as he saw you. A little smile went over his face and waved at you, he had some empathy for you which was not natural.

"Great to see you (Y/n)."

"Thank you," you gave him a warm smile "Was just looking for Jerome."

"Might be in his trailer. Probably arguing with his mother again. I heard them yelling." He shrugged clueless.

You just sighed in response, you knew what that meant. You'd find Jerome being beaten up in his room, his pretty face was covered in bruises and he'd try to overplay everything although he'd love to cry into your shoulder.

Immediately, you made your way to his trailer, almost running. You hoped he was fine and nothing that bad has happened yet.

Your feeling was wrong.

You saw him sitting in front of the trailer. He was crawled into himself like a little girl that was scared of getting punched but one of its parents again - what a cliche.

You couldn't see whether he was crying yet or not - you just hoped he didn't.

You hope was all gone as you came nearer, you heard him sobbing and sniffing. Fuck, you thought. Your felt sorry for him, you couldn't stand him being so sad. It made you sad, you just wanted to cry. You couldn't see him like that. Your heart felt heavy, breathing became a burden, pins and needles were all over your skin, tears were built up in your eyes at you were trying to hold back.

"Jerome-" Your breathe hitched as he looked up at you - his eyes were puffy and red from crying and his face...oh lord. He had a black eye, a red swollen lip with a bloody cut You almost didn't date to ask. You knew he didn't like taking about it "Wha-what has happened?"

"Had a little argument with my mum and her one off bozo." He shrugged sniffing and looked at the ground.

You couldn't understand Lila, you couldn't understand anybody who ever abused someone like that. Did they have fun destroying someone's life?! Did she love seeing her son hurt?

Saying nothing you took a seat next to him. You took his hand tangling your fingers in your and rubbed circles with your thumb slowly as you rested your head on his shoulder. You tried to calm him down with that. You knew words were useless. You could start this typical encouragement like everything's gonna be better bla bla. You and he knew it was not true and making him falso hope wouldn't help at all.

You both said nothing for a while. You gave him time to clear his head that he could calm down. You didn't want to annoy him with any stupid words or thoughts as well.

"I wanna kill her." Jerome said all of a sudden "She should feel the pain she causes me."

You gulped in surprise. You've never heard him saying like this before, he sounded so serious about it what kinda scared you. Was he serious about it? No he wasn't, right? Jerome was too adorable to be a criminal. He was surely just upset about the stuff his mother does to him and he doesn't know what he's sayinh.

"I just can offer you to stay with me, Jerome. You'd be save, no mother, no violent bozos. There'd be just you and me."

"Soon I will. I promise." He wiped his tears from his cheeks.

"Just say a word and I help you packing." You just kissed his cheek give him a little smile. It was the first time he said this. Now you were assured he really wanted to do all these things you've planned once: Living together, a wedding, kids.

Jerome looked at you now. His gaze met yours, a small smile was built up in his actually face. He was relieved. He was thankful you offered him a place to say although the he permanently denied it. He was thankful to have you by his side. You were his only supporter, and the most intense one.

"I love you," Jerome grabbed your cheeks softly and pulled you into a deep kiss. You couldn't help but smile as your lips touched softly.

"I love you, too." You said against his lips with a smile making him smile, too. You were thinking now. What could you do to make him feel better? Sex was no option for you - well, not right now. You wanted to give him the feeling of freedom, that he could do what he wanted or that he could be a normal teenager like you. You wanted to do something stupid with him. Something like buying tons of food like trying to win the biggest soft animal or taking silly photos of each other. You just wanted to see him happy again.

Then you had an idea.

You grabbed his hand and pulled him after you while you both stood up. Probably that was gonna be one of your most stupid ideas but it was fun. It was childish. Maybe he would even call you dumb but you didn't care. You just wanted to make him love and letting him forget all his problems.

"What are you doing?" Jerome frowned as he wiped the last few tears out of his face.

"I wanna cheer you up, silly." You giggled and kept walking "Have you ever eaten every sort of candies here Or every snack you can buy here?"

"What?"

"Yes or no?"

"Uhm...no? What are you-..."

"Time for changes." You smirked "We now go buy every single candy and every kind of fast food they offer here. Then we go out anywhere and eat them all up and vote what's the best and the worst one."

"Are you serious?" Jerome asked on disbelief.

"I'm anything but joking." You stopped walking giving him a stern look "So you're in?"

"I don't know," Jerome shrugged with a sigh "I'm just not in the mood for anything."

Instead of saying something, you pulled him into a tight hug and buried your face into the crook of his neck. At first, he didn't hug you back, just stood there; sad, unmotivated, pissed. You didn't mind about it. You could understand how he felt. Being beaten up and insulted almost every day had to be horrible. It was a living hell.

After a few minutes though, you felt Jerome slowly wrapping his arms around. His head was leaned against yours, one of his hands was placed on the back of your head and his fingers were tangled in your hair. You felt how he pulled you more against him. He needed you, more than before - more than anything right now.

"I hate seeing you like that, Jerome." You mumbled "I just want you to be happy or at least forget all these bad things for a moment. I know it's hard, but I just wanna help you, okay?"

"I know...thank you for that." Jerome kissed your head, then looked at you giving you a little smile making you smile, too.

"Anytime for you," You pecked his lips "So...does that mean you're in?"

"Do we really have to eat all candies?"

"Yes! That's the fun on it," You chuckled "How about we rate the candies? Criteria are taste and consistence. C'mon that'll be fun!"

"Fineee." He rolled his eyes with a slight laughter. You were glad. You were glad seeing him smiling, hearing him laughing a little. His eyes weren't full of tears anymore, he didn't look sad not like he was about to have a nervous break down. He looked like the funny and happy Jerome you got to know.

***

"What about Twinkies?" You ask as you and Jerome took a bite in it as you both sat n the back seats of your car. You really did it. You bought every candy that existed at the circus. Pop tarts, Nerds, Sour Patch, Twizzlers...everything.

In your eyes it was a good idea doing that. Not because you were obsessed with candies, you just wanted to distract Jerome - and it worked. He was laughing more, he was making jokes, making you smile. Exactly how you wanted it.

"I would say...hm...taste is 7 out of 10, consistence 8." Jerome said thinking "Makes 7.5"

"I agree," You said giving him the cotton candy "Now let's try this." You both took a bite in it.

"Taste is 8 out of 10, consistence is...6."

"Really? Just a 6? It's an 8 as a minimum." You frowned in disbelief. He can't be serious, can he?

"It's too fibrous."

"Well, that's the sense of cotton candy." You rolled your eyes "You aren't a cotton candy type, are you?"

"I just don't like this one. Its just made bad," He grabbed the pop tarts opening them "Now let's try these." And again you both took a bite in it.

"Fight me but 10 out of 10! Both criteria!" You insisted instantly.

"Agreed." Jerome nodded "I think they are my favorites."

"Hm," You pursed your lips thinking "I can't decide between Twizzlers and Pop Tarts." You really couldn't. You loved the frosted chocolate in Pop Tarts, and oh the cookie! The cookie was amazing. But Twizzlers... You loved the strawberry flavor. It was perfect! Not too sour, not too sweet, not bitter. Both were your favorite flavors.

"Let's try them again." Jerome eagerly grabbed the Twizzlers pack and ate some "Definitely Pop Tarts."

"Are you sure? They are both so... delicious and-..."

"I'm more than sure," Jerome interrupted me with a slight chuckle "Trust me, Pop Tarts are the best."

"Okay fine, Pop Tarts are the winner." You smirked eating up the rest of Pop Tarts. You admitted, he was right. Pop Tarts ARE the best.

"By the way," Jerome started scratching his head "Thank you."

"Anytime." you smiled kissing his soft and red lips. You accomplished what you wanted - he was happy again because of your silly idea "And next time we rate fast food."

"I'm in."

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samstree · 3 years

Text

Hug a Witcher Day (2/3)

In which Jaskier gets drunk and Geralt gets hurt. Hug a Witcher Day is coming around again, but so are certain feelings.

(hurt/comfort, geralt whump, soft jaskier, more yearning, 3k, rated T, blood and injury)

read on AO3

“No! Not Summer Solstice!” Jaskier shouts drunkenly to the lady approaching Geralt with open arms and then proceeds to use his own body as a shield to stop her advance, his footsteps unsteady. “Saovine! It’s the day before Saovine! I literally just performed the song five minutes ago so I don’t know why you guys keep coming at him. Today is not Hug a Witcher Day!”

Jaskier’s face is red as a beet. It’s no shock that he’s swaying considering the amount of wine he’s been consuming since the end of the set. She frowns at the bard like he’s crazy before muttering an apology.

“Jask.” Geralt holds onto Jaskier’s elbow just in case. He notices the tankard in the bard’s hand is empty again. “Come on. Let’s sit down.”

“But they—”

“I know and it’s all right. Just follow me,” Geralt explains, steering the bard away patiently. Arguing with the bard when he’s inebriated has never been wise.

The bard begrudgingly follows him to the side seats and plops down, smashing the empty cup on the wooden table.

“They—they got the date wrong. It’s not today.” Jaskier slurs in all seriousness to the witcher, his eyebrows still furrowed with residual anger.

“It is not,” Geralt takes the cup away from him, in case someone refills it and the bard will enter the even more bratty stage of drunkenness—or worse, the sappy stage. Geralt shudders at the memory of the Elder-speaking stage where Jaskier delivered an epic on top of a table. “I know it’s the wrong day, Jaskier, but you need to stop telling them off. You haven’t gotten paid for tonight.”

“What? Who wants to pay me for tonight?” Jaskier squawks indignantly, scrambling to pull his unbuttoned doublet together like a blushing maiden.

“Not tonight,” Geralt snorts, tilting his head towards the bustling party. “Tonight. The solstice celebration?”

The gears turn slowly but the bard eventually catches on, relaxing and folding his arms on the table.

“But everyone tried to hug you in the middle of the party.” Jaskier’s voice gets smaller and smaller in the din of the room. “It must be bad for your senses. You know, witcher senses…sensitive. People too grabby…bad.”

Geralt blinks, surprised at Jaskier’s concern. He hasn’t realized how crowded the hall is and how much noise is in the room. It’s a mixture of loud conversations and drunk giggling. Quite a few nobles did mistake the date in the song and come to throw their arms around him. It turns out being privileged also destroys all the shyness in one’s personality. It was…not uncomfortable until one woman’s hand traveled way lower to be considered proper.

He wasn’t going to fight her off—the lady being tipsy and old-aged and all, but that’s when the bard started to interject, blocking newcomers.

It was also when Jaskier started drinking.

Something warm swells in Geralt’s chest as he watches the bard drop his head on his forearms as if his neck can’t support the weight. Heavy-lidded blue eyes flutter shut for a second but he stubbornly reopens them.

“My thanks, for defending my honor.”

Geralt feels a languid smile tug at his lips, one that is slowly returned by the bard.

“Any day, my big strong witcher,” Jaskier says. “Especially the wrong day.”

The bard continues to shift his arms, trying to find a comfortable spot to pillow his chin, but the hard table is giving him trouble. He then notices the witcher sitting right next to him with a soft oh and, in one smooth move, takes Geralt’s arm and cushions it under his face.

It seems to satisfy him, hogging Geralt’s forearm and pressing his cheek over the sleeve. With a few nuzzles, Jaskier lets out a contented sigh and closes his eyes, leaving Geralt leaning forward awkwardly.

Although the witcher is strangely not in the mood to take his hand away, even when Jaskier is cutting off the circulation in his arm. A drunk bard is a force to be reckoned with. It will take some serious efforts to get him back to the inn—big strong witcher or not.

Just when Geralt thinks Jaskier has dozed off from the combination of post-performing exhaustion and too many cups of Toussaint wine, an incoherent murmur rumbles against Geralt’s skin.

“Can’t blame them—” Jaskier turns his head away, facing the other side, the warmth of his breaths ghosting over Geralt’s wrist. “—that they want to… but if I can’t…”

The bard trails off until the witcher can’t make out the words even with his enhanced hearing. Soft snores follow soon after.

Geralt shakes his head and scoots closer, just in case Jaskier needs more parts of him as pillows.

Autumn is around the corner before Geralt notices.

One moment the bard is complaining about the mid-summer heat and how the humidity is ruining his instrument, the next trees are already peppered with golden yellow.

The wyvern contract in a small village should be a quick and easy one. Only a scared newborn is spotted in the past month, possibly lost and lashing out. Geralt intends to time it perfectly so that he can finish it just a few days before Saovine, which means they’ll be on the road during the holiday, which means they will be alone on the day.

His day.

The whole conversation is thoroughly planned out in Geralt’s head, one that he’s certain will do the trick.

Isn’t today Hug a Witcher Day, Jask? Not getting it wrong this time, eh? Wait, there’s no one else on this empty open road. What a shame! After all, you are the one who invented the day. Wait, you want to give me a hug? Hmm, I don’t know… Fine, if you insist, but only because I don’t want you to break your own tradition.

He plays out those lines over and over again while entering what is rumored to be the baby wyvern’s nest with a smug grin on his face.

It’s fine to get a little excited. No one is here to see it anyway.

And the grin disappears when both wyvern parents emerge from the cave, prepared to protect the baby behind them.

Oh well.

When Geralt stumbles back to the inn with too many claw marks on his chest and blood soaking through his jerkin, he decides that the plan is shit from the start anyway.

Jaskier won’t hug him out of the blue. There’s always a reason if the bard touches him, like this moment, like when he rushes out of the door to meet Geralt and to put his uninjured arm around his shoulder. Like when he puts a hand at the small of Geralt’s back to keep him from stumbling. Like when he carefully steers Geralt into their room, settles him on a chair, and coos over the wounds with sweet nothings.

“I have to remove your shirt. It’s stuck with all the blood,” Jaskier tilts Geralt’s chin up so he can no longer see the mess all over his chest. Instead, blue fills his vision, wild and far-away, like the autumn sky. “Look at me, all right? Just focus on me, my dear. Don’t look down.”

He’s seen much worse on himself, but Geralt obliges anyway.

Lost in those cornflower blues, he almost doesn’t wince when Jaskier tears the fabric away.

“Sorry,” Jaskier whispers, but his movements never falter. “Just a moment longer.”

The burn of alcohol and the needle barely register in Geralt’s mind. All his senses are overwhelmed by Jaskier and the faint floral scent on his warm skin, the grounding touch of his palms, the soft apologies that slip through his lips, and then, the cold empty feeling of their absence.

Geralt lets out a small whine when Jaskier leaves him to retrieve the bandages, and it’s enough for the bard to fuss again.

“Shh, it’s okay. You are doing so well.” The bandages are wrapped firmly over the wound. Both of Jaskier’s hands reach behind Geralt to pass the roll and it brings him unbearably close.

Oh, it’s like Jaskier is hugging him.

For a split second, Jaskier’s face is almost pressed against Geralt’s collarbone, his hair ticking the side of his jaw. Those arms that he knows to be strong and thick are circling Geralt’s torso and squeezing gently.

He groans again when it ends.

But alas, it’s bound to end at some point. With his injury tended, there’s no need for Jaskier to keep showering him with touches and soft words.

Geralt doesn’t notice how Jaskier has the strength to put him in bed, the blood loss making the floor swim under his feet, but the mattress dips invitingly and Geralt finds himself cocooned by warm blankets.

Jaskier is still touching him.

“Comfortable?” Jaskier asks, his fingers carding through Geralt’s entangled hair soothingly and the urge of saying no is overwhelming.

No, not when your arms are not around me.

Geralt nods and a tired smile lights up Jaskier’s face. It’s a reserved one, mixed with relief and worry, and it’s so beautiful Geralt wishes he could cry at how it’s making his heart swell three sizes and filling up all the space in this chest. To think he’s the one who gets to see it almost makes up for not getting a hug from Jaskier.

Cold realization sinks in. He won’t get a hug from Jaskier on that day, because they’ll have to stay in town until at least Saovine.

Because he’s reckless enough to get injured like this.

His dismay must be showing on his face because Jaskier is fussing even more. “What is it? Is anything wrong, Geralt? Talk to me. What can I do?”

Jaskier’s brows furrow, his blue eyes wide with worry. Geralt desperately wants to soothe him, to catch the hand that is currently caressing his forehead, but all his strength seems sap.

Jaskier won’t hug him.

But it will be his day soon.

“Yes, your day,” Jaskier chuckles, and Geralt realizes belatedly that he’s said the last part out loud. “That godsdamned day. I never should have written that song. But let’s not think about it for now. You should rest.”

“No…” he croaks.

The regret in Jaskier’s voice is so wrong, so out of place that Geralt would do anything to banish it. He needs to tell Jaskier that he doesn’t mind the day. He needs Jaskier to know that a hug from him is all he can think about for the past year.

But none of those words gets out. The pull of sleep drags Geralt under despite his reluctance, the dark splotches filling his vision.

“It’s okay, don’t fight it. Rest, my dear.” Jaskier’s soft coaxing is the last thing Geralt hears before slipping into oblivion.

In the land of dreams, Geralt feels arms circle around him, grounding him with the pleasant weight. A warm body is pressed against his side, curling up around his frame protectively. He leans into it, just to feel soft breathing against his skin.

He wishes that he doesn’t have to wake up.

Geralt starts the second Hug a Witcher Day sitting at the corner of another tavern.

On top of his witcher healing, days of rest have made sure those wounds from the wyverns are completely healed, but Jaskier seems to disagree. The bard is still hovering, insisting on fetching Geralt everything and helping him get around all the time.

Geralt would scold him for being over-dramatic if he wasn’t enjoying being the center of Jaskier’s attention so much.

“No! You sit tight,” Jaskier says, stoping Geralt from getting up with a hand on his shoulder. “I will get the juice for you. What would they think of me if I let an injured friend do chores?”

“Who’s they?” Geralt asks.

“Oh, you know.” Jaskier backs to the bar, gesturing vaguely into the air. “The…masses. The fans who know about the good-hearted nature of Master Jaskier and worship my music for the very reason.”

The bard bumps into an empty chair when he turns, and Geralt glares at him. Jaskier’s theatrics almost distract him enough to miss the commotion from the street.

Coming towards the tavern door are the footsteps of another witcher, the lightness of his feet on the cobblestone unmistakable.

Geralt is alert in an instant, prepared to call Jaskier back. There could be trouble if someone from another school passes town.

The rider is approaching the tavern but he’s stopped quite abruptly, and Geralt hears the most familiar and bratty scowl known to men.

“Oh, come on! This fucking day! No, I don’t hu—” Lambert lets out a groan as someone obviously pulls him into a hug. “—Urgh, fine!” The other person is thanking him profusely. “All right. You’re…welcome. Yes, it’s fine…”

Lambert’s tone softens as the man continues to chat after the hug, rambling about how a witcher with white hair just fought off three dangerous wyverns and how the locals will forever be in debt.

“Right, right. And pray tell, my good man, where can I find this witcher?” It sounds like Lambert is smiling as he asks and it’s the creepiest thing Geralt has ever heard. “And his bard is with him?”

It won’t take long for Lambert to locate the two of them. It might be best that Jaskier doesn’t face Lambert’s ire head-on.

“Jask,” Geralt calls out anyway. “Come back here.”

“Is there any trouble?” the bard puts two cups of grape juice on their table, and Geralt only sighs.

“Remember when I said you should avoid—”

“Geralt!” Lambert bursts into the door with a bang, startling all the patrons and the owner. Jaskier even jumps and spills juice all over the table. “Where is your bar—Oh, there you are, you bastard!”

The bard is already up and facing Lambert’s incoming anger, his body placed in front of Geralt. More than once Lambert has tackled both Jaskier and Geralt rudely to the ground upon seeing them on the road as greetings.

Geralt warms at the protectiveness of his bard, but he should really be worrying about himself on this.

“Lambert, wait, he’s still hurt!” Jaskier pleads, with both hands out to stop Lambert’s momentum and, against all odds, it works

Lambert stops in his track, inches away from the bard. “My business is only with you, bard. You and your damned songs!” A dangerous glint sparks in the youngest wolf’s golden eyes.

“What—"

Jaskier on the ground before he can finish the sentence and a sharp squeal erupts in the tavern. He’s soon reduced to a giggling mess under Lambert’s vicious attacks. Chaos ensues at what’s supposed to be the quiet corner of the tavern, and Geralt can only take a sip of his grape juice to hide his smile.

By the time Lambert decides he’s had enough revenge on the bard—mostly through tickles—both men scramble up from the ground disheveled and worked up. The owner of the place throws them a suspicious side-eye but remains silent.

“That’ll teach you a lesson,” Lambert grumbles while sitting down on Geralt’s bench.

“Noted. No more hugging songs.” The bard fixes his hair with careful fingers and ignores the other witcher. “It’s not like any of you showed any appreciation. For all the thanks you’re getting, none goes to the bard.” He tsks.

“I’m sure Geralt thanked you enough for all of us. Or has he not pulled his head out of his ass yet?”

Geralt stares at his brother and his grumpy remark, confused at the meaning, but Jaskier asks first.

“What do you mean?” the bard says with half a mind still focused on the curly fringe over his eyes that sticks out stubbornly despite his fussing.

The air between them suddenly tenses. A knot forms in Geralt’s stomach, an inexplicable dread rising in his throat.

Lambert’s expression turns to something equally inscrutable and amused, which is all the more unsettling. No matter how much of a prick the young wolf is, he’s never been unreadable to Geralt in the many decades they’ve known each other. He doesn’t appreciate the suggestive way Lambert winks at him when the bard isn’t looking either.

Geralt kicks his brother in the shin, the ‘one more word and I will kill you’ conveyed silently. Anything that comes out of his brother’s mouth next can’t be good, so he has to interject.

“I told Jaskier it was fine. The song. Stop being a prick.” Or mention it ever again, the gleam in his eyes warns.

“My, my. I see.” Lambert grumbles but uncharacteristically withholds comment.

Jaskier finally gives up on fixing his hair, frustrated. “Must you ruin my hair every time? Now I’m sure you two can behave while I order us more food?”

Now that Geralt is so close to Jaskier, watching him going up to the owner behind the bar and holding the most mundane conversation on this morning, the ache slowly returns.

He wonders if Jaskier wrote the song thinking about hugging him. After all, the bard is the most devout advocator for changing witchers’ image. He wonders if Jaskier would give him one if he asked.

They’ll have to be alone first.

And yet, when Jaskier comes back to the table, the owner is following behind. If the bard has ever been sheepish in his life, it would be this moment.

Lambert realizes his intention first.

“No more hugging,” he deadpans, nudging at Geralt’s ribs. “Once is enough. You take the rest of them.”

“The wyvern almost killed her husband.” Jaskier sounds a lot less confident than normal, hesitant even. “Please, Geralt? She just wants to thank you.”

The owner is a woman near her forties or fifties, her expression hopeful. Geralt stands up, opens his arms, and tries to make sure his smile is as friendly as possible. Putting people at ease has always been Jaskier’s strong suit, not his.

But her relieved smile brightens up her whole face after they share a simple hug, her steps lighter when she leaves.

“She told me that she was worried sick for him. Her husband.” Jaskier explains, fidgeting with his fingers like every time he does before an important performance or competition.

“Jaskier.”

“You know that song is not out of nowhere, right? Well, the line ‘hug a witcher for good harvest’ was made up, but… you do make a difference, Geralt. I wanted them to know all the ways you’re making the world safer, and the hearts a little less broken. Just like you did for her.”

“Jaskier.” Geralt stills the bard’s hands before his nails dig into his palm too deeply. “It’s all right, I understand.”

“You do?”

“I told you I’m fine with some strangers hugging me for a day,” Geralt chuckles, “Because I’m not doing it for—”

The words trail off. Beside him, Lambert is scooching over in the least subtle way and any words Geralt had a moment of bravery to voice instantly die in his throat. He releases Jaskier’s hand.

“Don’t stop on my account!” Lambert starts to drink from one of the cups of grape juice, slurping loudly. “You being a sap is disgustingly adorable. I want to see how it goes.”

The moment is ruined further when another man comes over asking for a hug and he’s not the only one. More people are noticing the day and two witchers and the bard sitting in the room, looking at their table expectantly.

Jaskier leans back, making room for more incoming townspeople.

It seems that Geralt will be busy hugging this year as well. He just doesn’t know if all these people can fill the Jaskier-shaped hole in his chest.

---

Should I end this story with hugs, kisses, or *wink* something more? Tell me what you think! <3

Tagging: @wanderlust-t @rockysstupidity @flowercrown-bard @alllthequeenshorses @mothmanismyuncle @percy-jackson-is-sexy- @constantlytiredpigeon @behonesthowsmysinging @rey-a-nonbinary-bisexual @birdsflyhome @dapandapod

Please feel free to tell me if you want to be removed or added to the list <3

#geraskier #geraskier fic #hurt/comfort #soft geralt #soft jaskier #geralt x dandelion #geralt and his feelings #hurt geralt #starring geralt and his feelings #jaskier #geralt #hugging #but still not with the bard :(

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atlafan · 4 years

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Night Shift - One Shot

a/n: back at it again with another Halloween themed fic! This was inspired by an ask requesting Harry and Y/N both work/meet in the ER. Slight twist on it, but I hope you like it! Reblogs and feedback are super helpful! (not proofread)

Warnings: friends to lovers, smut at the end

Words: 6.8K

Becoming a doctor took a lot of hard work dedication. Countless sleepless nights, a large debt to pay back, finding a hospital to become a resident in, and countless seminars to go to, to make sure all practices were up to date. At first, Y/N hated working the graveyard shift. She rarely got to see friends or family, she was getting minimal amounts of sleep because, let’s face it, sleeping during the day never worked out the way you wanted it to. However, she stopped minding it so much when one of the nicest nurses took his turn on the overnight shifts.

Nurse Styles was usually the voice of reason. He could calm any patient down, and the kids in pediatrics loved him. He always had a lollypop ready to go. All of the nurses took turns with the different shifts so it was fair for everyone. He had heard of Dr. Y/L/N, but had never met her. She was newer to the hospital, a white coat, but still baby-faced. Harry really enjoyed being a nurse, he didn’t want to be the person in there doing surgery, but he liked being able to get things started, and ease someone into the more difficult things. He had a way of administering bad news, and easing the pain from it. His broad shoulders were perfect for crying on, and if it was a kid he needed to prep for getting their appendix out, he held their hand the entire way to the operating room.

Y/N was just getting in, putting her things in her breakroom cubby when Harry walked in. He smiles at her, and she smiles back as he also puts his things away.

“Chilly out there tonight.” He says as he puts his scrubs on over his long sleeve under armor. She only looked for a second, his arm muscles were certainly defined. “I don’t think we’ve properly met yet, I’m Harry.” He extends her hand and she takes it.

“It’s nice to meet you, I’m Y/N.”

“Well, Y/N, lucky for you I’ll be your nurse for the next couple of months.”

“You seem a little too chipper about working overnight.” She chuckles as she gets her white coat on and stethoscope around her neck.

“I don’t mind it.” He shrugs. “A lot of the other nurses have spouses and kids they rarely get to see, so it’s only fair I take my turn on the overnight stuff. I usually take it this time of year anyways.”

“Why’s that?”

“The Halloween crazies start trickling towards the end of September. Think the staff likes having me as extra muscle or whatever.”

Her face pales as she looks at him. She had completely forgotten about Halloween. Last year she worked during the day, but she had heard about all of the nonsense from the entire weekend. Drunk people needing their stomach pumped, car wrecks, people on drugs, etc.

“So, what’s your specialty? You’re not a surgeon are you?” He breaks her from her trance.

“No, I’m not a surgeon, just a regular old doctor. I almost ended up in maternity like a lot of female doctors, but it wasn’t for me.” They both walk into the main area so they can get briefed for the night.

Harry says hello to the other nurses at the desk, and he takes his seat to login into the computer. There was another doctor on the overnight shifts, Dr. Gilles, and Y/N really couldn’t stand him. He was one of those doctors who was sort of rude to the nurses because he had been at the hospital for a while, but he was handsome so a lot of them didn’t even care. He would flirt with Y/N when he’d get the chance, but she didn’t really like it. She’d seen Scrubs, she didn’t need the drama that comes with hooking up with a coworker. Not to mention the guy was, like, forty, and she was only pushing thirty. To some that may not be a big age difference, but it weirded her out nonetheless. It weirded her out more when he’d catch her flirting with some of the younger nurses.

“Evening everyone.” Dr. Gilles. “He says as he walks up to the desk. “Quiet so far?”

“Pretty much.” Nurse Halleran says. “Hope it stays that way. You’ve got a couple of people you just need to check in on.” She hands him a few charts and he nods as he takes them. “How are you, Dr. Y/L/N?”

“Good.” She says as she looks over her cuticles. She feels his eyes burn into her, and she fiddles with some of the pens on the desk. “Nurse Styles, back on the graveyard, huh?”

“Yup.” Harry says with a fake smile. He also did not like Dr. Gilles. He felt protective over the other nurses, and none of them felt uncomfortable by Dr. Gilles, but he was a married man who openly flirted with people, and that kind of behavior just didn’t fly with Harry. “Dr. Y/L/N, one of your patients needs their vitals checked. Young thing, coming down from a bladder and kidney infection.”

“Alright, let’s go.” Harry hands her the chart and she looks it over as they walk to where the patient was sleeping.

Bethany Martin, ten years old, bladder and kidney infection. Another doctor wanted to size her up for an appendix removal, but it was Y/N that discovered that it wasn’t the child’s appendix. The girl had told her the pain had moves from the front of her stomach, to her side, and then to her back. She got major brownie points from the administration for making that catch.

Her and Harry slowly go into the room. Her father was sleeping in one of the fold out chairs provided. He wakes up when he hears the door open.

“Hello, Mr. Martin.” Y/N whispers with a smile. “We’re just going to check on Beth’s vitals, see how her fever’s doing, alright?”

“Sure thing, thank you.” He stands up and goes over to his daughter to help her wake up a little.

“Hmm.” The girl slowly opens her eyes, and then she smiles when she sees Y/N. See, Beth was scared that she was going to get cut open, so she was beyond grateful that she didn’t have to have surgery. “Hello.” She says sleepily.

“Hi, sweetheart, I need to check a few things, would that be alright?” Y/N asks.

“Yes.”

“Hi, Beth, how’s your IV feeling in that hand?” Harry asks her.

“It’s itchy, Nurse Harry.”

He smiles at her. A lot of the kids would call him that instead of Nurse Styles, he thought it was sweet.

“Think we should switch it to your other hand then.”

“Why’s it in her hand and not in her arm?” Y/N questions.

“We had a tough time…this one likes to pull away.” Harry explains and winks at Beth which makes her giggle.

Y/N let’s Harry switch out the IV. She lets Beth hold her hand as she winces from the needle. Once he’s done, Y/N checks everything else. She has Beth roll onto her stomach so she can feel around her back.

“I haven’t been as achy.” Beth says as she gets settled on her back once more. “It still hurts a little though.”

“Mm, I bet. Took us a bit to figure things out with you, but you seem to be doing a lot better. Should only need to be here for another few days. We’ll come back to check on you later this morning.”

“Thank you.” She snuggles back into her blankets and slowly falls back asleep.

Mr. Martin thanks Y/N and Harry before they leave, and she they both go to wash their hands at one of the sink stations.

“Nurse Harry, huh? Do all the little girls call you that?” Y/N smirks.

“Why, jealous?” He bumps his hip to hers before grabbing a paper towel to dry his hands. She rolls her eyes at him, and he chuckles. “The kids just tend to call me that, I don’t mind it.”

“It must ease them a bit more to be on a first name basis, I should remember that. I hate seeing kids in pain, I’m glad she’s doing better.”

“I know it sucks, but I actually like working with the kids more. They at least listen to us. Some of these adult patients…they fight us on every little thing sometimes.” They make their way back to the desk.

“Dr. Y/L/N?” Nurse Stevens says to her. “I’m going on a coffee run, would you like anything?”

“You’re an angel, yes”, she reaches into her pocket for some loose singles, “just a regular with a little cream, no sugar, thank you.”

“Harry?” She says to him.

“Brought my thermos, but thanks Ellie.” He smiles at her and she nods before going on her way.

“She’s the best, I’ve worked with her during the day before.” Y/N says to Harry.

“Yeah, Ellie and I came on together.”

“Oh, really?”

Harry hums his response as he types some notes into the computer. Harry and Ellie had a bit of a past, nothing serious, but they had hooked up on occasion. Being a nurse meant working a lot of long days, and that left little room for a social life or companionship. They may or may not have taken advantage of the beds in the room adjacent to the breakroom a few times, but that was a year or so ago. She had started seeing someone, so they ended things amicably.

“Why just the cream and no sugar?” He asks to change the subject.

“Well, for a while I was doing the keto thing, which is absolute rubbish and I never should have done it, but I got into the habit of not adding sugar to things. I don’t like the taste of black coffee, it’s too bitter, so the cream helps. I don’t miss the sugar, in fact, I can’t stand really sugary drinks in general.”

“Why’d you do the keto in the first place?”

“Oh, I was looking to lose some weight before a wedding I had to go to. I was a bridesmaid so I just wanted to look nice in the pictures, you know? It works when you stick to it, but as soon as I stopped I gained most of it back. Deprivation diets are never a good idea, and I knew it, but did it anyways because it was a quick way to do things.” He goes to say something, but decides against it. Her head tilts as she can tell he’s withholding something. “Go ahead, tell me as a doctor it was stupid of me to jump on a fad diet.” She sighs and leans on the tall desk.

“No, I was just going to say…” He blushes slightly. “Well, I just feel bad that you thought you needed to lose any weight because you…well…you must know how beautiful you are as is.”

She stands up straight. She literally just met this man tonight, what was going on? Just as she was about to say something, Ellie comes back with the coffee.

“Here you go.” She smiles.

“Oh, thank you.” Y/N takes the coffee. “I’m gonna go take a walk to the other nurse’s station, see how they’re doing. Page me if you need anything.”

Harry watches her walk away and he groans with his head in his hands.

“Don’t tell me.” Ellie smirks. “You have a crush on Dr. Y/L/N…shocking.” Ellie giggles and rolls her eyes.

“I just met her, I don’t have a crush on her. But I may have just said something inappropriate.”

“You?!” Ellie was shocked. “Harry, you’re, like, the nicest person I know. What did you say?”

“I just told her she was beautiful.”

“It’s not like it’s a lie, she’s rather pretty. Seems to take care of herself. It’s not an easy thing to do, especially on these shifts.”

“I know! It just felt weird after I said it. I don’t wanna be like Dr. Gilles, you know?”

“Please.” She scoffs. “You’re nothing like him.”

Y/N does her nightly rounds, checking on her various patients. A few people come in that need to be checked right away, but other than that things were quiet. Around six in the morning she and Harry go to check on little Beth again.

“Definitely only need you here another couple of nights. Keep getting those fluids in, and this fever will go away in no time.” Y/N says.

The girl nods at her tiredly before falling back asleep. Y/N helps out with some last minute patients before going to the breakroom to change. Harry was in there taking his shirt off. She tries not to stare as he pulls a sweatshirt on over himself. She wouldn’t have minded a few more moments to examine his tattoos. She knew he had a few just from his left hand alone, but shit, he had them all over his chest and stomach!

“Well, see you tonight. Hope you can get some sleep.” Harry says to her.

“Same to you.” She smiles and goes into her locker.

“I hope, uh, I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable earlier in the night…” He rubs the back of his neck.

“You didn’t, it’s fine…I’m just one of those people that has a tough time taking a compliment. Um, it happened to me in school a lot too, like, if someone told me I was smart or something, you know?”

“Okay, I just wanted to make sure.”

“I appreciate that, Harry, thank you.”

He nods and heads out. On his way home he realizes he’s far too awake to be able to fall asleep, so when he gets into his flat he takes a sleeping pill, and nestles down with a cup of tea while he watches a little TV. Once his eyes feel tired he heads to bed, getting cozy under his blankets, and eventually passing out.

Y/N does something similar. She definitely takes a sleeping pill before jumping into a warm shower. She pulls her blackout curtains, and gets into bed. Her eyelids feel heavier and heavier as she listens to a podcast, and she slowly falls asleep.

Things went on like that for the next couple of weeks. Harry would often assist Y/N on her rounds. He liked that she wasn’t one of those snooty doctors that discounted the nurses, she really seemed to value their opinions, even consulting with them when she needed to. They became fast friends too, often eating together or taking coffee breaks at the same time. She learned that Harry was a couple of years younger than her, and he had been at this hospital for around five years. He explained he liked working at a hospital rather than a smaller practice so he could help more people, and she said she felt the same way.

“Maybe when I’m, like fifty, I’ll settle and open up my own practice. But only because I might not have the same spring in my step.” She chuckles as they both sit and enjoy some coffee.

“You can really sprint when you need to! You were incredible when that guy came in with that allergic reaction the other night.”

“I was internally freaking out the whole time to be honest with you. I was glad to have you there to help me intubate him.”

“Feel like I can do that with my eyes closed now.” He laughs and finishes his warm drink. “I hate to be one of those people, but you’re looking a little tired tonight.”

“Oh, that’s because I never left this morning. I worked all day, took a nap, and then got right back on it.”

“Y/N, that’s not okay. You can’t do your job properly if you’re tired.”

“I know, but we were short staffed, and I was only going to stay a couple of hours, but I got wrapped up with a couple of people. I’m fine, honest, I’ll have a good sleep when I get home later.”

“Shit like that used to happen to me all the time. I’d work sixteen hour days, and then they’d yell at me because I was getting so much overtime, and I’d tell them to hire more bloody people then. It was infuriating. Then you think the place is gonna fall apart without you when you finally do get some time off.”

“Literally! I think that’s why I got stuck here for so long. I have the next couple of days off, though, so I’m looking forward to that.”

“Yeah? Any big plans?”

“No.” She scoffs. “Not unless you consider binging a fuck ton of television while eating a gallon of ice cream big plans.”

“Depends on the show, what’s on the docket to be binged?”

“I’ve been meaning to sit down and watch Ratched. I’ve heard some mixed reviews, but I’m just so intrigued.”

“Mm, nothing better than a show about a crazy nurse.” He rolls his eyes.

“Aw, feeling a little misrepresented?” She smirks.

“Maybe a wee bit. Let me know if it’s worth the watch, though, yeah?”

“Definitely.” She finishes up her coffee and sighs. “Back to it I suppose.”

“Go lay down if you want, we’re not busy.”

“No, it’s fine. I’m catching a second wind.” She stands up and shakes her body out. “See, awake and ready to-“, her beeper goes off, “Shit, some teenagers were just brought in.”

They both hurry out of the breakroom, and go to where they’re needed. Three teenage boys were laying in hospital beds, clearly in pain.

“Alright, what seems to be the problem here?” Y/N says as Harry works on taking their vitals.

“We…fell off the water tower.” One of them says.

She sighs and starts checking for bumps and bruises. She doesn’t ask why they were there, she was sure their parents would rip them a new one for that. A few sprained ankles, and one broken wrist, but nothing too serious otherwise. Y/N gives her instructions to Harry, and tells the boys they’ll need to switch off between aspirin and ibuprofen to help with pain and inflammation. Harry gets the broken wrist into a splint and sling, and gets the others settled as well.

“Isn’t this a little backwards?” One of them says to him after Y/N’s left. “Isn’t she supposed to be the nurse?”

“Well, considering that she went to school for a lot longer than I did, and probably has a lot more knowledge about the body than I do, I’d say she’s supposed to be the doctor.” Harry says.

“Isn’t it weird being a male nurse though?”

“M’not a male nurse.” He makes some notes on the laptop he was using. “I’m just a nurse.” He closes the laptop and looks at the three of them. “Your parents should be here soon, hope you lot feel better, and be safer out there.”

It wasn’t the first time Harry got a comment like that, and it wouldn’t be the last. He didn’t go to school as premed and then go off to a fancy medical school. He majored in Allied Health in uni, and passed all his tests. That was it, and that was all he wanted to do. There was nothing wrong with that. He was proud of himself. He hoped Y/N was proud of herself too.

Flu shot season was in full swing, and there were usually a couple of days a year the hospital did walk-in appointments so people could come in easily to get them. Harry had picked up a shift to administer them. Y/N had come in to be on call so one of the other doctors could have the day off. She smiles when she sees Harry in the cafeteria at lunch.

“Hey, you.” She says as she sits down. “Weird seeing you in the daylight.”

“Could say the same to you. What’s all this about? Don’t tell me you’re working another triple…” He raises an eyebrow at her.

“No, I swapped shifts with Dr. Jollas so she could have the day with her kids. What are you doing here today?”

“I’m on for the flu shots. It’s an easy enough shift to pick up.”

“Get a lot of people in for that?”

“Sure, tons.”

“That makes me happy to hear.” She sighs.

“How were your couple of days off? Did you watch your show?”

“I only watched about two episodes…there was a lot more gore than I was expecting.”

“Y/N…you’re a doctor…”

“Yes, and I can handle small amounts of blood, especially when I’m in the moment helping someone, but there was literally a scene where they were showing how lobotomies were done and a scene where this kid cut off his own arms, so it was a bit much for me. Not something I should be watching alone, anyways.”

“That’s gross.” Harry grimaces. “Don’t blame you for not getting through it.”

“So I ended up just re-watching The Office for the millionth time. It was perfect.” She chuckles. “Are you working all of Halloween weekend?”

“I am.” He nods. “I hope you’ll add some flare to your outfit. The kids like it when we do.”

“Some flare, huh?”

“I have these scrubs that have pumpkins, ghosts, and black cats on them.”

“Hm, I’ll have to think about what I can add. I have some earrings with witches on them, that could be fun.”

“As long as you get into the spirt somehow. We all decorate the nurse’s station and everything. Ellie usually brings in cupcakes too.”

“Speaking of her…” Y/N leans in a bit. “Did you catch the rock on her finger? I’m happy for her and all, but she said she’s only been with her fiancé for eight months. It’s a bit fast.”

“Well, they were casual before they made things official. She was, uh, seeing a couple of people, and then he asked her to get serious and she did.” He shrugs.

“Oh, I see.” She nods and sits back. “I’m not judging or anything, I mean, I guess when you, you know.” She takes a bite of her food, and then leans back in. “Can I ask you something?” She whispers.

“Always.” He leans in as well. Harry be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy a spot of gossip, and Y/N had become his new favorite person to gossip with. It didn’t take them long to become the two bitches that are always talking shit about everyone else.

“Do people use the bunk room to bone?”

His face flushes, and then he clears his throat.

“Why would you ask me that?”

“Because you know everything about this place! I wish it was a singles only room because I swear I saw Nurse Halleran and Dr. Gilles coming out of there, and only one of the beds looked used.”

Harry makes a disgusted face and rolls his eyes.

“I feel bad for whoever he’s married to.” He shakes his head. “Scumbag.”

“Nurse Halleran’s married too! I could never do that. I mean, I’ve been in relationships before, and maybe I’ve thought someone else is attractive, I can appreciate a pretty face, but I would never cheat on my significant other. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself.”

“Same here. That’s, like, the ultimate betrayal. How do you even come back from that? I get that our jobs can make for lonely lives, but make the time count at home when you can.”

“Does he have kids?”

“No, I think that’s why he doesn’t feel bad about it. She has two kids, though, I don’t know, I only talk to her about work things if I can help it. I miss some of my girls from the day shifts, like, Shauna is super nice and has this really warm smile.”

“Feel like she’s the hospital granny.” Y/N smiles. “I like her a lot too, the few interactions I’ve had with her.”

“How long do you think they’ll keep you on the night shift for?”

“I have no idea, think I’m just paying my dues as the new doctor. I’m getting more used to it, it’s not too bad. If it goes through summer I can drag my bum to the beach and sleep there.” She laughs and so does he.

“Might have to join you for that, I love getting a good tan.”

“It’s a date.” She says, more so as a joke, but from the way he looks at her he may have taken it a different way, so she clears her throat and laughs it off. “Anyways, I better get back to it. Nothing worse than being in the middle of eating and the beeper going off.” She stands up. “Have a good one, Harry.”

“You too.” He watches her walk away, and he sighs.

On Halloween, Y/N goes in a few hours early because she was told they let the kids go around the halls to the different nurse’s stations to trick or treat, and she really didn’t want to miss out on it. She puts on her witches earrings, and some spooky pins for her coat, and out she goes. She stops off at the store to buy some extra candy, and puts it in a pumpkin shaped bucket. She smiles when she sees Harry behind the desk already in his Halloween scrubs.

“Excellent effort.” He says, and then taps his finger over his mouth in thought. “Could use a little something extra, though.”

“Yeah? Like what?” She sets the candy down on the desk and he walks around it.

“Follow me.” Y/N follows Harry into the breakroom, and he pulls a bag out of his locker. He has her go into the unisex bathroom wither, and she sits up on the counter for him. “I’m working a double today, I did some face painting earlier for some of the younger kids. Sort of a way to give them a costume for when they walk around.”

“Harry, why don’t you just solely work in pediatrics?”

“Because I did some face painting for the elderly too, now hush. I need to concentrate.”

He takes what looks like a black sharpie out of the bag, but Y/N recognizes it as liquid eye-liner.

“What exactly are you going to do with that? Give me cat eyes?” She chuckles.

“No, you dolt, we’d need hours for that. I’m just gonna draw a little spider web on your cheek, alright?”

“Okay.”

Harry had never been this close to her face before. She got a nice whiff of his cologne, and she liked being able to see the few freckles he had. She notices now he’s painted his nails black and orange, he must really like Halloween. She closes her eyes as he starts drawing on her right cheek. His eyebrows were furrowed in concentration. A slight gasp leaves her lips when his other hand grips her chin to tilt her head.

“Still just me, don’t worry.” He chuckles. “Don’t get jumpy on me.”

“M’not, sorry.” She sucks her lips into her mouth as his hand moves to the side of her neck. Y/N may or may not be a little touch starved.

“Almost done.” He says just as she was opening her eyes back up.

“Harry, has anyone ever told you how pretty your eyes are?”

“Shut up.” He scoffs, and finishes up. “All done, tell me what you think.”

“I mean it!” She says as he backs away enough for her to hop off the counter and turn around in the mirror. “Oh, excellent job. I especially like that you drew a little spider dangling from the web.”

“It’s my signature detail. Now you look perfect.” They look at each other through the mirror. “We should probably get out of here before someone thinks we’re boning.”

She bursts out laughing at that.

“Good one.” She says and shakes her head.

“It wasn’t that funny.” He mutters as he puts the bag back in his locker.

“N-no, it wasn’t.” She clears her throat. “Sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” He nudges her shoulder and they walk back out to the main area.

The trick or treating was a lot of fun, and the kids seemed to have their spirits lifted. Then shit got real when the drunk people started coming in, the people the police had to bring in for psych evaluations, and the people that had too many edibles. It was crazy busy, Y/N had been running around all night. She was given the okay to go lay down for about thirty minutes since she had come in early. She stops short when she sees Harry laying in one of the bunks. He was laying on his side with his arms crossed over his chest. She quietly slips into one of the other bunks, and takes a deep breath.

“You’re awfully loud.” He says.

“Christ! I was quieter than a mouse!” She says, and turns to face him. He opens his eyes and grins at her. “Ah, you were just fucking with me.”

“Obviously.”

“Busy out there tonight. I mean, I expected it, but still.”

“I know.” He yawns and stretches out. “I’ve been in here too long, I need to go back out before I get groggy.” He swings his legs over the side of the bed and slowly gets up. “Have a nice snooze.”

“Thanks.” She chews her bottom lip for a moment. “Do you have any makeup wipes? I’d hate to wake up with a smudged web.”

“Oh, sure, one second.” He leaves momentarily and comes back in with a wipe for her cheek. Instead of handing it to her, he sits on the edge of her bunk, cups one of her cheeks in his hand, and uses the other to carefully wipe off the drawing. Her eyes flutter closed and she sighs. “There.” Her eyes open back up and she smiles softly at him.

“Thank you.”

There was something brewing between them, they could both feel it. He’s about to lean in to kiss her, but he hears the click of the door open, and stands up immediately. It was another doctor who was I desperate need of a snooze. Harry leaves, and Y/N tries to relax enough to fall asleep.

They don’t see each other again until the morning when they’re both getting ready to leave. He chews on his inner cheek, trying to work up a little bit of courage.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sure you’re probably tired, but…I have these, uh, pancake stencils where you can make pancakes look like pumpkins or ghosts…I thought maybe we could celebrate surviving Halloween together, but I’ll understand if you’re ready to just crash or-“

“I’d love to have breakfast with you.” She smiles as she closes her locker. “I’m gonna go home and shower. Text me your address, yeah?”

“Alright.” He smiles and watches her walk out.

Y/N takes a very quick shower so she can freshen up. She wasn’t sure what might go down between them. She felt like she was getting to be a little too old to just be hooking up with someone, but Harry was really great, so she decides to just go with the flow. She heads to his flat after he sent her his address, making sure to buy some orange juice as something to bring over.

He lets her in and she can’t get over how cozy he looks in his sweatpants, graphic tee, and cardigan. She was in a pair of leggings and a sweater.

“It smells so good in here.” She says.

“Thanks, I made some tea too if you want something warm.”

She nods and he pours her a cup. They giggle over the pancakes, and Harry confirms that Halloween is definitely one of his favorite holidays. The two decide it might be fun to watch a Halloween movie, but naturally after a long sift, they fall asleep together on his sofa. She was nestled into his chest with his arms wrapped around her. She would have slept longer, but she woke up to the sound of him snoring. She shuffles a little, but accidentally knees him in the groin, waking up immediately.

“Shit, I’m so sorry! I didn’t realize I was laying on you like this.”

“It’s fine.” He says as he reaches for himself. “I’m good.” He knuckles at one of his eyes, keeping his other arm around her. He looks at the TV screen and sees that something else had come on. “Slept through the movie…”

“Guess we got a little too comfy.” She looks up at him. “Forgot how nice it was to cuddle with someone.” She mumbles tiredly.

“We could…go to my bed if you want, have a proper cuddle.”

“Would you spoon me if we do that?”

“Yeah, if that’s what you want.”

She nods yes, so he manages to pick her up, and carry her to his bedroom. She almost didn’t want to let go him when he sets her down, but all is good once he slides in next to her, pulls the blankets over them, and he wraps himself around her. She sighs as his pelvis aligns with her bum, and his arm wraps around her waist.

“Good?” He asks.

“Mhm.” She wiggles against him to get even more comfortable.

“Don’t do that.”

“Why not.”

“Because I’ll get excited, and that’ll make things awkward.”

“Define excited.”

“You know exactly what I mean, Y/N.” He sighs.

“I wanna hear you say it.”

“I’ll get hard, and it’s already difficult enough to control that around you, so-“

“You can press it against me if you want, I don’t mind.” She looks over her shoulder at him.

“You’re serious?”

“If I wasn’t I certainly wouldn’t have let you carry me to your bed.” She rolls onto her other side to face him. “I like being your friend and all, but I’ve done this with someone who’s just a friend before. I…I feel like we almost kissed earlier…”

“We did. Can we try again now?”

“Please.”

His hand slides to the back of her neck and he pulls her closer to him. His lips still tasted like the syrup they put on their pancakes, and she likes it more than she really should. Her tongue swipes along his bottom lip, and he opens up for her. Their tongues swirl around each other, and she tugs him on top of her as she turns onto her back. One of his legs goes between hers, and she grunts when she feels his thigh right on her. She wraps her arms around his neck as their tongues still mold together.

She slips her other leg around his waist so he could lay full between her. He groans into her mouth as he grinds himself against her. A soft moan leaves her lips when she feels how hard he is. She could feel herself throbbing for him. He sits up a little, just to get his cardigan off, and her hands slide up his stomach under his shirt. He shudders from her touch, and he just takes his shirt off too. Her eyes widen as she can finally look over his tattoos.

“This is beautiful.” She says as her fingers trace over the butterfly on his torso.

“Thanks.” He smiles and gets back down to lay on her chest to chest as he kisses her.

He kisses from her lips, along her jaw, and to her neck, all while she’s grinding herself against him. One of his hands finds her hair and he yanks her head to the side so he can get better access to her neck. He licks over the spot just below her ear, and he sinks his teeth in. He sucks on her soft skin, and her mouth falls open. She normally wasn’t super into biting, but whatever he was doing felt really good. When he pops off her she puts her hand over the new bruise.

“That’s definitely gonna leave a mark.” She says to him.

“Kind of the whole point.” He smirks. “Maybe Dr. Gilles will leave you alone if he thinks you’re already getting it from someone else.”

“Not very professional though, is it?”

“That nice white coat of yours will cover it. Wear your hair down for a few days, no one will notice. Or maybe they will, oh well. I’ve never much cared what other people think.”

“That’s because you’re not the one walking around with a mark on your neck.” She pouts at him.

“I could be if you wanted to give me one.”

She bites her bottom lip to contemplate just about every little thing that’s going on between them. She had her legs around him, she was in his bed, and he was shirtless sucking marks into her neck.

“Are…are you going to fuck me?” She asks.

“Do you want me to?”

“Kinda.” She giggles. “You’re, um, really sexy, Harry.”

“Well, that’s very nice of you to say, but ‘kinda’ isn’t exactly a yes, Y/N.”

“Could we maybe just…touch each other? Below the belt?”

“Yeah, we can do that.”

He rolls them both over so they’re on their sides facing each other again, and he pulls her leg up over his hip. She reaches for him first, skimming her fingers along the band of his sweatpants before dipping her fingers him. His breath hitches as she palms him over his boxers.

“You’re okay with this?” She asks him.

“Very.” He grunts. “Go for it.”

She nods and slips her hand inside his boxers, wrapping her hand around his warm cock. She bites her bottom lip as she runs her thumb over his tip, which was already leaking precome, and she slides it down his length.

His hand grips her ass before sliding it around to her front, and pulling her leggings back so he can get his hand in. A moan leaves his lips when he feels her wetness through her thong. He pets over at first, teasing her a little, but she squeezes him a little too tight, and that was signal enough to get the show on the road. He tugs her thong to the side, and runs his fingers along her slit before dipping his middle finger inside her. She squeezes around the intrusion, and then she relaxes a bit for him.

Harry slides another finger inside her, and works them in and out as his thumb takes care of her clit. He leans in to kiss her as they work each other over. She sucks on his bottom lip as she pumps his slick cock in her hand. He finds himself bucking into her grasp, but neither seem to care since she was grinding against his fingers. He curls them up inside her, and that’s when she starts breathing heavily.

“Oh, shit.” Her mouth falls open and she starts pumping him faster. “Fuck, oh my god, H-Harry, it feels so good, don’t stop.” She was nearly gagging for it, and it shocked him to see her falling apart like this just from him fingering her.

“Y/N.” He moans and presses his forehead to hers. “I’m gonna come.”

“M-me too, shit.”

She feels her hand become warm and sticky as she comes around his fingers. She tightens around him to make it last as long as possible, and then she catches breath. She doesn’t want to make a mess of his sweat pants, so she takes her hand out slowly, keeping as much of his come in her palm as she can. They make eye contact, and she licks her palm clean. He does the same by sucking his fingers into his mouth.

“You’re, like, a little kinky.” She chuckles and so does he.

“You literally just did the same as me!”

“I was trying not to make a mess of your sheets!”

“I can wash ‘em.” He laughs more, and then tucks some hair behind her ear. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”

“I’m thinking you like me a little more than I thought.”

“A lot more, actually. You like me too?”

“Yeah.” She smiles. “I like you, Harry.”

“Thank god, I didn’t want this to be awkward at work.”

“Just don’t try to get busy with me in the bunk room. I will not contribute to that.”

“Listen, when you’re tired and desperate, it’s not such a bad place to get frisky.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” She rolls her eyes. “Could I use your bathroom quick? And then if you don’t mind, I would actually love to sleep a bit more.”

“Of course! And yeah, that sounds good.”

She uses his bathroom, and he cleans himself up. He offers some pajama pants a tee shirt, and she happily accepts. She changes and crawls back into bed with him. He spoons her, and rubs at her side, giving her a kiss once in a while on the back of her neck. As she falls asleep in his arms she thinks she had never been so thankful to work on a holiday in her life.

#harry styles #night shift #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles y/n #harry styles smut #harry styles fluff #nurse!harry #doctor!y/n

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bangteamhyuk · 3 years

Text

In This Rain

Genre: Mafia (AU), Action, Suspense/Thriller, Smut

Mature content

Word Count: 4,962k

Characters: Police Captain!Namjoon, Police Officer! Reader, Mafia Boss! Jungkook.

Warning: mentions of drug use, graphic violence, language, oral sex, penetrative sex, implied dom!reader, emotional manipulation, mention of psychopathic characters, implied torture

Synopsis: You admire your captain, your beloved Capt. Kim Namjoon. You admire him so much that you wanted to be by his side always, well, quite literally. Under his office desk, inside his apartment, on his bed and even on his dangerous mission against a vicious Mafia leader named Jeon Jungkook.

He’s been so obsessed in Jungkook, his formidable enemy on his entire career, that he’s been trying to apprehend him for years. Until both of you uncovered an unsettling truth as to why he always slithers: there’s a mole within your department.

Namjoon kicked the door hard with his combat boots, took cover immediately from the wall behind him, before aiming his gun to the direction of the open entryway.

“Freeze!” he shouted.

Yet he was the one that was left frozen at the scene. Two men, thin as a stick, were staring blankly at the ceiling. Clearly passed out with rubbers wrapped around their arms, old scabs and fresh jabs on their skin. Several discarded needles were left lying on the floor.

They look so oblivious from the presence of Namjoon and his team that you can’t help but call him out “Namjoon, I think we’re late” you shook your head, as you watched their cold and drugged out bodies sitting on a plastic chair, heads resting on the air.

“We are, they’re both dead” Hoseok said after checking their pulse. He stared at them for a moment, as if saying a prayer as he shuts their eyes gently with his finger.

Namjoon walked around the room and picked a used foil and a paper with logo of a lotus flower “Jungkook…” he mumbled to himself as he crumpled the paper and threw it on the floor in fury.

“Are you sure it’s him?” you went to pick it up and checked. It was definitely the symbol of his organized syndicate.

“Positive” Namjoon’s blood suddenly rushed in and felt nauseous at the thought, as he shut his eyes, hoping that he was wrong about it.

“It was a close one...” Hoseok rummaged through the pockets of the two men, but he found none.

“I was so sure, they’ll be here. Him and his men. But why does it look like they knew... You think” you shut your eyes and gasped, realizing what Namjoon might have just thought of earlier. “there’s a mole within the Department?” you continued, slowly turning around to see Namjoon’s reaction. His face turned grim and just weakly nodded.

“I trust that you two would keep this a secret, until we find who it is…” Namjoon swore. It wasn’t about money or his ego any longer, he wanted to end this. For years. Whatever this was, he wanted to stop people from dying, stop wasting innocent lives, end the fear of women and children always being on the brink of death.

“Roger” Hoseok nodded.

“Roger, Captain!” you blinked and stood up. You and Hoseok tapped Namjoon’s shoulder, assuring him that you two were on his side. Always on his side.

You and Hoseok stood behind closed doors, but it was very apparent that the chiefs and the Department heads were clearly upset at the result of your team’s recent mission.

“Goddamit! We told you to think things through Kim and you blew it! You got one shot! One fucking shot, and you didn’t even get to meet a single strand of his hair!” the deputy chief exclaimed.

“What a waste of the city tax, really, you haven’t given us any valuable result” the Department head, fixed his paper and put everything inside his briefcase.

Namjoon just stood there, taking every thing silently. He was called names before, been spatted, got hit, everything. He’s the man who’s been through all horrible things and yet he still took it in. No wonder why you’ve like this guy, there’s something incredibly attractive about an underdog filled with potentials. It’s as if you’re hearing a club of hyenas around a lion, waiting for it to roar. He was the kind of leader you want to solemnly swear your loyalty, and that was the reason why you were there.

After the sham meeting, you and Hoseok just followed Namjoon towards your office room. He was clearly angry and frustrated, as well. But more than that he was determined to find another chance to get close to Jungkook . Namjoon went to his desk silently, and studied recent reports and profiles of people on his desk, piled and unkept.

Hoseok, feeling unnecessarily guilty, excused himself to get the team sandwiches from a nearby store.

You on the other hand, had something in mind to ease Namjoon’s frustration. “Hey there” you whispered on his ear. “Not here, Y/N. Not today” his eyes still concentrated on the screen. You gently pressed his shoulders, unbothered at his plea and made gentle circular motion, caressing his stiff shoulder blades. You slowly crouched down to kiss his ears and traced it down his neck. “You know what reminds me of your stiffness?” you chuckled.

“I said stop!” his quick reflex surprised you, as he held on to your wrist. His eyes stern, full of resolved. You stood up, and knew that he wasn’t up for any games.

“I just heard everything from the meeting. It’s hard to miss.” You folded your arms, as you watched him turn his back on you again and type disordered words on his screen. “Try, typing Gwangjin-gu, April 16…” you reached out for his hands to guide his finger from each letter on the keyboard, as he suddenly groaned softly to the sensation of your warm hands.

You smirked, seeing him freeze for a second. You crouched back down again and slowly reached for his legs hiding underneath his desk. “You know, it takes Hoseok about half an hour to get back? No one’s around. I’m sure you needed to let loose of that tension” you spoke softly, while caressing his legs. He slowly turned around from his seat and opened his legs.

“Give me 10 minutes tops, Captain” you smirked as you knelt down, and unclasped his belt.

Namjoon just stared at you blankly for a second, thoughtless and unsure. But as soon as he felt the warmth that you give right in the middle of his legs, he cursed and responded in pure ecstasy. You watched him toss his head and covered his mouth, trying not to cry out your name, but you love it. You love seeing your beloved Captain, the one people look up with so much pride and respect, becomes susceptible to your touch.

You were lounging in the smoking area during your break time, even though you aren’t smoker. You just like being outside, on a bench, and beside a vending coffee machine where you could refill your own cup.

“Hm, Sun Tzu’s Art of War” you heard Namjoon’s voice from behind. You nodded in agreement, as you finished the last line of the page and flipped it to the next.

“Read this about 9 times, still holds true” you replied, not leaving your gaze towards the book.

“I got a lead” he pulled out his cup from the vending machine and scoot beside you on the bench. You closed your book and turned to face him. Namjoon peered behind you, and looked around before he dropped the name “Seokjin”. You squint your eyes, trying to figure out how Namjoon arrived at his conclusion.

“You mean Kim Seokjin from the Hi-tech Crime Unit?” you spoke softly towards him, making sure no one hears even when it was only the two of you in the area.

He nodded, grinning. “I always wonder how he received information about them, everyone in his unit is as competent as he is but he would always get the best lead”

You smiled, finally beginning to piece things together. “It does seem odd Namjoon. It doesn’t make sense, but it does seem bizarre? How does he get those information?” you stared at Namjoon and smirked “I never thought of that, Captain. As always, that’s pretty smart of you to---”

“Y/N!” you heard someone call.

“Speak of the devil” you smiled at Namjoon then at Seokjin.

“Meet you after office hours?” Seokjin ran up to you, handing you a bag of sandwich. Namjoon tilt his head in confusion.

“Yeah sure” you blushed, turning your head to the floor at Seokjin’s sweet gesture.

“Y/N, are you…. Are you two going out? Since when?” Namjoon stood up, puzzled at the scenario. Clearly, you have left him out of the picture, but it’s not like you owe him anything. Besides weren’t you two clear about the position you two are in? Just colleagues trying to help each other out? Out of convenience?

“Kind of like that. Well, you never asked about our private lives, Cap” you chuckled. Not that he doesn’t care, but you know how much he respects his colleague’s personal space. Well, except on some occasion when you two needed to satisfy each other’s need. “Give me a minute, I just need to talk to my superior” you faced Seokjin for a moment and watched him wait for you at a distance.

“Cap, I’m sorry.” You cleared your throat and continued “The news surprised me too, and I didn’t know how to tell you. Can you trust me? I’ll try to look on to this. I swear, feelings won’t get involved. If I happen to find anything that might point a connection against Seokjin and Jungkook, I’ll let you know immediately”

“And what if he is? Are you okay with it? You know what will happen if he becomes part of our custody” he asked, worriedly.

You shut your eyes and nodded “I’m aware. I’ve been seeing him Jin for half a month now. It’s nothing compared to you, Cap” you looked down, refusing to look back at him, not when you just confessed your feelings for him albeit indirectly.

“Y/N…” he spoke softly.

“You don’t have to say anything.” You shook your head “I know this is purely work, lives are on the line…” You begrudgingly replied, then you paused. “That’s why I’ll make sure I’ll get compensated well on this” you slowly turned your gazed at him, now smirking.

“I can only pay what the government give--- ” you stopped him mid-sentence by pointing a finger on his lip, raising yourself up, tip-toed.

“Not that silly” He tilt his head again in confusion. “You, wrapped around my fingers. Go figure.” You whispered on his ear and chuckled. You turned around, and left him wondering on his own. It took him a moment before he realized what you meant. He bashfully chuckled at the thought.

After spending more time with Seokjin for months, you’ve finally gathered valuable information to report directly to Namjoon, which entails you in meeting him straight to his own apartment each night.

“Are you ready for tomorrow?” he asked, as he gathered his boxer he left from the floor. You remained still in bed, panting after doing a marathon with Namjoon. Namjoon opened his window to let the cold breeze enter his dull room.

You turned sideways and watched him moved out from the bed, savoring his bareness. “Nearly, ready”

He tied his discarded condom and threw it on the trash bin “Y/N, whatever happens tomorrow. I just want to let you know that I---” he paused, trying to construct what he was about to say.

You sat up, despite remaining bare “Shh” You reached him out for a kiss.

“If things goes bad tomorrow, I want you to know that you mean so much to me” he took your wrist and kissed the back of your hand, his lips pressed hard as if hoping that his pure intentions will get through your skin.

You shook you head. “Aren’t I just a colleague, Namjoon?” you smiled weakly, reminding him of the reality that you are just there for him… for his own convenience.

He cupped your cheek and kissed you again. “You’re my partner, in everything Y/N”

You parted and smile. “I’m glad you feel that way” you pushed him back to bed, and pulled his boxers off again, almost ripping it to two. You wanted to let him know he wasn’t wrong, about feeling that you are his.

He was clearly surprised at your reaction, and flustered upon seeing you right above him. You smiled, amused at the view. To see your beloved Captain in such a vulnerable position. And like a clockwork, you sat comfortably on his waist as you pulled his wrists towards you. You forced his palms open with yours and directed it to your chest, letting him feel you again.

You closed your eyes, as you let him cup you gently “Captain..” you breathed his name while you shut your eyes, and began moving your hips slowly.

“Shit” he quickly got hard again, and you felt that. You felt his excitement again after you shamelessly teased your beloved Captain. You took a sealed condom from the bed side table and placed it on his harden length. He pulled one of his hand away and held on to it, then guided his length towards your entrance. You opened your eyes and smile.

“Ready for a second?” you asked. You watched him nod, as he began to push it in within you, both of you cursed almost synchronously at the ecstatic sensation. You tossed your head, and began moving your hips.

He held on to your waist, and you relished on it. You relished the way your Captain held on to you, you relished at the sight of seeing someone strong like him depended on you for comfort and affirmation. Exhilarated at the view of him below you, exhilarated at the thought of your own superior, down at your mercy.

Seokjin informed the Investigation Department again, which the assignment was promptly relayed again to your team: “Apprehend Jungkook and his men in #32 Namdo Building Gangseo-gu District”

At the same time, Namjoon informed the Investigation Department of his suspicion against Seokjin.

“You sure, Kim? If you’re wrong about this, not only will you lose Seokjin’s trust but your whole credibility as a Captain…” Mr. Song, one of the Investigation head, reminded Namjoon.

“I am certain sir. One of my partner, Y/N, was able to gather pieces of evidence that may point out his guilt in conniving with Jeon Jungkook” he bowed and handed him a manilla envelope containing the things you took from Seokjin, secretly.

“Very well, we will take Seokjin in to custody after I examine these things. Good luck on your mission” he bid Namjoon good luck as he watched Namjoon ran towards his car while it rained.

“Point A to D clear” you heard Hoseok speak from you and Namjoon’s ear piece.

“Copy” you subtly replied from your microphone hidden inside your shirt. “Ready, Mr. Kim?” you fixed his necktie inside the car. He didn’t reply, his eyes were burning with hatred. You’ve never seen him this determined to be able to see Jungkook, his formidable enemy, finally in the flesh.

You and Namjoon, took great lengths over these past few weeks to be able to secure a seat on this secret meeting with the boss himself, Jeon Jungkook. Despite at his tender age of 22, he was able to amass a fortune more than his father and his forefathers could ever gain. And now at the age of 24, he was able to bring down all his enemies. Rumor has it, he would clear out his enemy’s entire family line so that no one could ever attempt to take revenge against the whole Jeon family.

But Namjoon was ready to risk it all, even if his own family was on the line. He was willing to wager everything he has, just to end his lunacy. Yet he still couldn’t bring to himself the idea of risking and losing you against Jeon.

“Y/N, if anything goes bad, I want you to run as far as you could. Away from this, okay? You know how vindictive Jungkook can be” he stared at you, longingly.

“Joon” you shook your head and corrected yourself “I mean Captain, I’m trained to face whatever remember? Whatever happens, I’ll show up. It’s part of my job---”

“Okay, lovebirds, enough chit-chat. You know this is recorded right? We’ll be handling our conversation to the heads, unless you wanted to let them know about your secret affair or whatever this is… God, it’s awkward listening to you two!” Hoseok said on the other line.

You chuckled. “Can we have this off-record? Anyway, he’s right Captain. Time’s running. You need to get to your sit there now, as Mr. Kim the representative of Fiery Brothel of Songpa-gu District. I’ll stay here, make sure everything is working according to plan, alright?” you pat his collar and checked his ear piece if it was greatly secured. “All dashing and ready!” you smiled at him.

Namjoon introduced himself as Mr. Kim to a man in red suit “I speak on behalf of my superior Mr. Co, who manages Fiery Brothel in Songpa-gu owned by the Jeon” The man in red suit just nod and led you inside the building.

At first, Namjoon was confused as to why he was led inside a burger chain. Then he turned to the left hallway and entered inside the “authorized personnel staff room”, Namjoon followed. The room was cramped and filled with cleaning tools, food and personal hygiene products and other things.

The man pulled out the fire extinguisher from the glass box, where he found a button hidden behind it. He suddenly pressed it twice, paused then thrice, paused then once. It was a secret code. The wall started to separate from top to bottom, unfurling another secret entryway that leads to a speakeasy bar-cum-opium den.

Namjoon quickly recognized few faces around, from the head of the other government department, to local celebrities, even the sons and daughter of influential businessmen were there. Gambling, out of wits, high from the aroma of opium mixed with other things.

They continued to walk, the man in red suit clearly unbothered, as if it was regular business. Namjoon gulped and tried to calm himself, putting a mental note on everything he saw and commit it to his memory. He’ll be needing it once he get his hands on Jungkook. Everything he sees right now, everything he owns, he wanted to see him lose it. He wanted his downfall. he was confident that after that night he’ll finally put everything to its end.

“This is as far as I can lead you sir” the man stopped in front of the door, bowed and opened it for Namjoon.

There it was the high table. Only 6 men, sitting on each side of the table, making him the last and the seventh member to the meeting. His heart was pounding fast, hands starting to grow cold, shaking uncontrollably. Little sweat beads were forming behind his neck, it’s as if he was drugged and out of wits as well, except his feeling was driven by his own fear.

Just a few second upon entering, he saw Taehyung and Jimin enter first from the front door of the room. He presumed it was an exclusive entryway for Jungkook and his trusted men, in case something bad happens, but nothing bad ever happened when they’re there. Taehyung and Jimin were his only trusted men. They were skilled, precise, ruthless and cold to the core. They would blindly kill anyone and even everyone for Jungkook, even if it cost their lives.

Jimin, narrowed his eyes towards Namjoon while he chew on his bubblegum. Taehyung, on the other hand, watched the other men shake in fear too. All were waiting for the boss himself to enter the room.

The room was white and bare, almost blinding to the eyes. The only color that was present are their ashen faces (except Taehyung and Jimin), their black clothes and the long dark-red oaken wood table and its matching chair. And finally, he was there, all in flesh.

No longer a picture posted on his office walls. No longer a dream, that woke up him up each night in fright. This was Jeon Jungkook. Young, tall, handsome, almost perfect that he can pass up as a god. Well, technically, he is, because he is the kind who plays like one. Because any mistake they omit in his presence can swiftly translate to a painful death.

Everyone rose from their seat to show their respect and fear towards him. Jungkook smiled. Too kind and too sweet, as if he looked innocent. But everyone knew better, he wasn’t the slightest bit of it. When he sat from his chair on the front, everyone followed, except Jimin and Taehyung who stood there to watch over.

Jungkook listened to each person during the meeting, he was attentive, alert and smart. He was the kind of leader that would bring shame to the whole police department, perhaps the whole country. Everything that runs out of his mouth were well-thought, intelligible and thorough. He didn’t leave a single issue unresolved, and the men quickly took note of it. The men were so scared that they just nodded without any further question. Jungkook like things brief, and hated being interrupted. The moment he finds someone that annoys him, Taehyung, a sharp shooter, will place a single bullet straight through their head. Not even letting them finish their first word.

“Actually, I’m sure you are all aware of the situation you are in right now, don’t you? I called everyone for a meeting because some of you are doing a very, very poor job” he grinned at everybody, nose a bit scrunched, like a harmlessly little bunny pouncing sunshine on each person on the table. Yet everyone looked down, nervous and grim. So did Namjoon.

Namjoon wasn’t aware of it. Neither anyone on the team. What was Jungkook thinking? Did he knew? Did Seokjin informed him that they’ll be attempting to take him in? Sh--

“Shit!” one of them men screamed in fear as he tried to ran towards the door, but before he could take another step from his sit, Jimin managed to throw his dagger in his head which passed through his eye and pinned his body down the floor.

“Tsk” Jungkook shook his head in disappointment. “Atleast, we were able to eliminate a coward in this group. Anyone wants to follow?” he raised his eyebrow as he chuckled again. Clearly entertained at the sight of blood.

No one dared to speak, not even a sound of whimper. “Very well, now that no one wants to speak for themselves, I would, for everyone’s behalf. I need to keep my business flowing, and you all are doing a terrible job. Thus, it’s unfortunate to inform everyone in this room that no one will survive today…” Right upon hearing it, Taehyung fired his gun towards 3 other men on his side and Jimin with his daggers flying and pinning the remaining 2 heads to the wall on his side, simultaneously and precise. “Except you, Kim Namjoon.” He blinks slowly and smiled at his direction.

“How does it feel to finally meet your nightmare?” he stood up and went to his direction.

Suddenly, Namjoon heard Hoseok cursing on the other end “Namjoon, it’s a trap! They knew! If you’re still there, run! Quickly! The mole told everything about us!”

“Where’s Y/N?” Namjoon asked Hoseok, but you only heard noises from his end.

“Y/N?” Jungkook asked. “You know I don’t like it when I don’t have someone’s full attention”

“Where is she? My partner! Did you take her? Did you kill her?” Namjoon immediately stood up from his seat, demanding Jungkook for an answer. Jimin swiftly threw his dagger to pin Namjoon’s legs back to his seat while Namjoon cried in shock and pain .

“You know I wouldn’t dare you pissing Jimin any longer Namjoon, unlike Taehyung he doesn’t have much patience. If you try to move again, I swear the next time will be a bullet from Taehyung’s gun and it’s far more painful than Jimin’s knife… and I can’t assure you where he wants to aim it. Sit” he spoke calmly, and strangely alluring yet intimidating.

Hoseok spoke again “The mole is here! Seokji----- scchhhht” Taehyung went to Namjoon side and pulled the ear piece away from him, threw it on the floor and stepped on it.

“Where is she?!” Namjoon demanded, eyes intensely fixated on Jungkook.

Taehyung crouched down and slapped his mouth. “You’re not asked to speak” he took the broken ear piece from the floor and pushed it inside Namjoon’s mouth “You better listen!”

Namjoon gagged a bit and spit the shattered pieces “Enough Taehyung, I bet he’s got it” Jungkook commanded.

“You and Seokjin will pay for what you did to Y/N!” he screamed, his fear already absent upon realizing the possibility of losing you for good.

“Seokjin? Who is he?” Jungkook chuckled. “While, it’s true there’s a mole within you” he sat on the table, just inches away Namjoon. “It’s not Seokjin, whoever he may be, I never met the guy. He sounded like a nice guy” he shrugs, still smiling. “Give you a clue, try to think who is out of reach right now?” he taps his temple.

Namjoon paused. When he realized who it was, his blood rushed up to his head, leaving him cold, nauseated and in pain. “No, it can’t be”

There you were, entering the room from the door in front of everyone inside. Safe and unharmed “Hey love, I miss you so much!” you quickly ran towards Jungkook and jumped to give him a long pressing kiss.

“No… but why?” Namjoon’s eyes started to cloud with his own tears.

“Love, why don’t you tell him?” Jungkook pouted as he turned to face you, and pulled you in closer, letting you sit on his lap.

“Well, I got bored here. I decided I want to play police. That’s why I’m here, but I got bored too, so I decided to come back” you smiled at Namjoon then at Jungkook “to you, love”

Jungkook chuckled, his nose scrunched again in a bunny like manner, as he point his finger against your nose and tapped it “That’s my girl, isn’t she cute when she gets bored?” he asked Namjoon.

“But everything, what we’ve been through, were they all lies?”

You shook your head still smiling “Not everything, no. Well, except everything about Seokjin, and the brothel and Mr.Co…” you rolled your eyes, sluggishly “Didn’t I tell you I’ll make sure everything goes according to plan? I mean, my plan that is…” you shrugged.

“How?” Namjoon’s head fell to his chest, clearly desperate, praying that everything he was hearing from you weren’t true.

“Well for starters, it’s really not hard to fake documents, my background then my history… You’ve seen the opium den earlier didn’t you? The head of National Office Record is pretty much a regular these days, we just gave him a little freebies and then we’re good. But you sir, you were pretty interesting, I really had a great time!” you nodded.

“It was actually me who subtly planted the idea that it was Seokjin, it was me who gave Seokjin information, the exact location and a glimpse of our plan, well without telling him I am part of the group that is” you playfully traced your finger on Jungkook’s neck, letting Namjoon watch while he aches at everything. The reality that was unfolding before him.

“I was the one who curated random stuff as your evidence, made up stories about a non-existent Mr. Co and the Fiery Brothel in Songpa-gu, reserved a seat for you in the meeting and voila! You’re here! Isn’t great, love?” you gave Jungkook a peck on his lips and he nodded.

“Y/N” Namjoon cried

“You know Namjoon? I really like you, that’s pretty much true. But this man right here” you turn to Jungkook and playfully squeezed his cheek “I love him so much, I’m willing to give my life for him. That’s the difference. To be by your side, quite literally and to be by his side, forever, wherever I may be” Jungkook giggled at your declaration for his love.

“Please say it’s a lie! Tell me, you’re being forced by him, just say it. Please, I love you!” Namjoon screamed

“Stop, Namjoon” you watched him in pity. “Didn’t I tell you? We’re just bunch of colleagues…”

“Boss, what are you going to do with him?” Jimin’s eyes remained focused against Namjoon while he pops his gum.

“Love, what do you plan?” Jungkook gazed at you lovingly, while he was fixing your hair.

“He’s where he is supposed to be. A captain who just lost the trust of his superior and his men, just because of a woman. Isn’t it a tragic story, the story of a naïve pawn? This way love, you’ll be able to move freely with your business.” You stared at Jungkook’s lips, resisting to kiss him while he revel at your impregnable intellect.

“As usual, impressive as always” Jungkook nods as he kissed you again. “Let him live, so he’ll be able to tell our tale, a precautionary one to not screw with us”

“Y/N” Namjoon pleaded.

“Namjoon, you were the best Captain really. Thank you for the memories” you smiled.

Then Taehyung swiftly hit Namjoon in the face, leaving him unconscious, but only for a while.

Namjoon blinked at the sensation of rain drop falling over his face. Next thing he knew, people in scrubs were rushing towards him, raised him up from the pavement outside the hospital and secured his tired body on a stretcher.

“Sir, are you okay? Do you know where you are? Do you remember who left you here?” Namjoon was so oblivious at the moment, that he just tried to pull himself up to see if everything that happened earlier was a dream.

Until something fell from the inside of his coat. He picked it up “The Art of War by Sun Tzu?” he opened a page and saw a little note from you that says

“An enemy of my enemy is my FRIEND :) - Y/N”

Even when this rain stops, when the clouds go away I stand here, just the same Without saying anything, looking at the world There, a not so beautiful me is looking at myself In this rain In this rain

Rain by BTS

A/N: Thank you for giving time and reaching this far. This is my first attempt in making a smut fic so please be kind >.< This fic is actually my birthday gift for Slyn (SLL-AW Fictions) she’s a writer from YT who pushed me to try doing one too. Her bias is Jungkook so, naturally, the story ended with Y/N falling in the arms of Jungkook.

This is also nod and an attempt to honor one of my all time favorite fanfic, the BEST EVER CREATED on the internet about BTS: “House of Card by Sugamins” (if you know, you know 😉 )

I am so whipped for Master Jeon Jungkook that I just 👁️👄👁️. I didn’t want to recreate the verse, because I just can’t... I could never. House of Card is like a whole level of superiority and I’m just...a nursery...

Although, I borrowed the dark environment and the emotions involved in the characters... but I am totally disclaiming it to be a part of the verse. I’m a huge fan, I’m sorry I’m geeking out 😭 (Sugamins if you ever see this, I love you and thank you!! 😭 huge fan!!)

Slyn’s favorite genre are mafia, action, and romance (specifically with Jungkook). She’s aware of House of Cards too so yeah..

Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed “In The Rain” :).

PS. If you haven’t read “House of Card” please do! It’s on a03! Google it! BUT YOU HAVE TO BE 18 and above... and open to like practically everything! Read the warning signs first before you proceed. But I swear, it’s the best out there!!! (you’ll know why it hit a million views once you finished. That fic should be in a book, and I’ll gladly buy several copies!

ALSO, I’m so sorry for making Y/N a villain/psychopath. As well as Jungkook, Jimin and Taehyung. Forgive me. It was raining hard one day while listening to Rain on by BTS and the ending scene just came up to my mind and I happen to work on it since... :<

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kwonhoshi0 · 3 years

Text

𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝐚 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝

navigation | requests : open | 2nd march 2021

pairing : bakugou x fem!reader

genre : fluff, heavy angst

warnings : mutual pining, soulmate AU, !quirk world, heartbreak?, eating, vomit

themes : falling in love, unfair world, ‘it had to be us’, slow burns

desc : in a world where when you see your soulmate in their most vulnerable state your eyes change to the colour of the one you’re meant to be with, but sometimes soulmates aren’t allowed to be together, the way the universe was made is cruel it hurt.

a/n : i’m about to cause so much pain so i’m sorry in advance 🕴

listen to :

this world was cruel, that much was clear.

one couple in a thousand are fated to be apart, the thought didn’t scare you much since people in love always find a way, right?

when you touch your soulmates hands for the first time you feel a little spark, like electricity but for 1 couple out of 1000 they’d get thrown apart, quite literally thrown apart. they’d repel like the opposite ends of a magnet.

reading people’s experience on the matter broke your heart, people fated to be together only for their wishes to become nothing but that, wishes.

the same happened to your aunt and uncle, they’re together but apart, not allowed to touch eachother without being repelled apart. you watched it firsthand and it hurt seeing them live so happily apart in this unfair world.

your other uncle was no other then pro-hero all might, he raised you from the age of 3, your parents died when you were young, in a villain attack. they died fighting and their last wish was for you, their daughter to grow up a happy child in the care of your fathers brother, all might.

your uncle is an amazing guardian, he was nervous but he taught you everything he knows, your wish is to be a pro-hero exactly like him, exactly like your parents and that’s what he wanted for you as well even if there were dangers who was he to say no to your dream?

he trained you carefully, your quirk was powerful and sometimes hard to manage when not in control of your emotions, your quirk is telekinesis, you can lift yourself into the air with enough power and your hands stabilise the quirk, your nose bleeds when you start overusing it and you get lightheaded but with the help of all might you slowly got better at handling the power.

-> FIRST DAY OF UA

‘y/n you’re up next’ you walked up to where your class teacher aizawa was standing, steadying your feet a little you flicked the ball into the air only above your hand and then using your mind and hand you shot it up into the sky, everyone watched in amazement as you got the best score by barely trying. your eyes locked with a blondes, his eyes stood out, they glistened gold and crimson in the sun dancing in the light hitting his face but you looked away feeling your face heat up at his looks. ‘hey y/n right? you did amazing out there my names mina ashido!’ you smiled at her friendliness, ‘hi, you did pretty great too’.

-> HIM

as the months went on you caught yourself staring more and more at a certain blonde, sometimes you caught him staring back. it was no secret that you’re attractive anyone with eyes could see that, someone had recorded you trying to regain your breath during the sports festival and it went viral. when you caught him staring at you from across the table, you simply smirked at him before going back to talking to denki and mina.

at first you thought your attraction to him was only because of his looks, until you started getting to know the boy underneath. he’s caring, he’s thoughtful, he would never say it but he is. you noticed when he would do things for others, when you all moved into the dorms after the USJ attack you started to notice his small gestures to show he cares, they may not be big but you noticed.

in his eyes you are incredible, he often thought about your strength, physically and mentally. everyone thinks that you’re lucky because you got to learn from all might but they never thought about the circumstances in which you got there, your parents died but you still fought on. at first you were closed off, until you became friends with mina who introduced you to the bakusquad, you all clicked immediately. your sarcastic humour paired with their loud and bakugous equally sarcastic humour fit like a puzzle.

-> love birds

‘hey idiot, come here’, it was 8pm and the dekusquad had sneaked out to watch the sunset along the beach. you hopped down from the railing and traced it with the tip of your fingers before reaching him, ‘what is it blasty’, you looked at him, the crimson sky faded along with pink, the sun only illuminating the colour onto his face making him look beautiful he looks pretty , she looks pretty. if only you could hear eachothers thoughts.

‘look at them’ you looked down from the perch to see denki kicking water at kirishima and sero as mina threw wet sand balls at them both, you giggled at the sight, even her laugh is pretty he thought.

‘hey love birds!! get down here!’ the pink haired girl yelled.

‘SHUT UP PINKIE’ neither of you denied it, maybe because that’s what you wanted.

you all sneaked back into the dorms when it got dark, you clicked your phone ‘12am’ you whispered to your friends, thankfully no one snitched on you. the wooden floors creaked a little as you made your way to your room, you grabbed your towel and slipped off your clothes before slipping into the shower, once you got out you threw on a large hoodie which almost went down to your knees. ‘y/nn bakugou is being annoying can you help’ denki pouted making grabby hands at you. after agreeing you skipped downstairs to see the boy nagging over the dishes, smiling a little you walked over to him.

you started cleaning up the dishes he was nagging about as he made you all food since you were all hungry from the beach. ‘thanks’ you grinned hearing those words leave his mouth, even if they were quiet ‘what was that blasty?’ he glared at you ‘i will deck you’ you stifled a laugh at his words as your eyes connecting with his crimson ones for a second, both of your eyes widened looking into the others before you quickly went back to the task at hand.

he just has pretty eyes.. that’s it fuck, no i don’t like her, fuck.

———

falling in love with katsuki bakugou was not in your plans, but the way the blonde haired boy fussed about cleaning and things that you’d think he’d give no care to struck you. the way he’d pick a stray fluff or hair off kirishimas clothes but not tell him, the way he’d use his anger to mask him affection. it all endeared you, but why?

maybe it was the night you went to the beach, when he looked down at your friends messing around like it’d be the last time he’s seeing them, or the way he looked at you when you sneezed with a grin on his face,

‘why are you smiling at that’

‘you sounded like a fuckin cat’,

was it because of his eyes, his stupid pretty crimson eyes telling you to come closer, telling you to kiss him. — or the night he looked after you when you got drunk in the dorms, you had drunk a little too much and felt yourself feeling sick, before you knew it you’d ran upstairs to your bathroom and started vomiting into the toilet, he followed you and lifted your hair out of your face, ‘idiot take these’ he handed you some medicine for the pain in your head. — and he stayed with you that night so you wouldn’t be sick by yourself.

it’s been almost two years since you caught feelings for him. two years since you fell dangerously in love with the angry blonde boy.

———

today you were attacked by the league of villains while training and everything was okay, you were fighting alongside him, while you were fighting back to back you hadn’t noticed the villain to the side of you, he was aiming for bakugou, you did what you could in the moment and took the hit for him. you didn’t know what the persons quirk did but it didn’t seem to affect to you at all. ‘IDIOT GRAB MY HAND’ you quickly shook your head to get rid of the dizzy feeling taking place and grabbed his hand.

as soon as you defeated everyone you gathered near the front of the facility and that’s when you felt it. feelings from your past, the pain of having zero to very little memories of your parents, the pain of everyone but you knowing them, most of all the anger. you screamed crouching to the ground throwing your hands over your ears trying to get rid of the emotions they were overwhelming and painful. bakugou told aizawa that you got hit with a quirk but it didn’t do anything, he ran over as soon as he heard you scream.

‘y/n!, can you hear me.. fuck what’s happening’ you squeezed your eyes shut yelling out again as the stabbing feeling covered your body like needles, aizawa tried erasing the quirk but it was no use.

you gasped for air as the pain finally stopped and opened your eyes, ‘FUCK YOU SCARED ME SO FUCKING MUCH’ you smiled weakly as you realised he’s cradling you, — your eyes change colour when you see your soulmate in their most vulnerable state — ‘wait what is-’ you looked up at his words to see his crimson eyes replaced by your [c] ones, your own eyes now crimson, in only 5 seconds his eyes turned back to crimson as yours turned back to [c].

‘bakugou’ you were afraid to look at his expression, he tilted your head up and he smiled at you ‘i’m glad it’s you, i’m so fuckin glad it’s you’ you beamed at him as tears welled up in the base of your eyes.

that night you were planning on going on a date together, just you and him. mina and denki were sat on your bed crying and screaming about what happened, ‘ugh the way you looked at eachother makes me want a relationship!!’ she sobbed as her lips formed a pout, you laughed at her antics as denki did your eyeliner for you. ‘is this okay?’ you went for very ‘you’ clothes and you were pretty satisifed with your outfit, smiling you turned to them. ‘now this isn’t fair how do you look good in everything’ you scoffed before booping the pink girl.

you had butterflies in your stomach before even meeting him, the way he made you feel nervous but ecstatic. ‘hey’ you turned at the voice, smiling when you noticed you accidentally matched, you wore a black jumper with a skull on it as he wore his black skull t-shirt. you both noticed this and smiled.

‘gonna keep staring at me dumbass, come on?’

you walked after him smiling at his eagerness, ‘where are we going blasty’ he quickly looked up at the stars before saying ‘to see some memories’. after 10 minutes of walking you noticed the beach, it was the same one you came to with your friends, the one where you watched the sunset together, when you were oblivious to the others feelings. you talked and laughed about how oblivious you both were,

‘i kinda knew it was you, i think, i don’t know it’s fuckin weird.. i saw you and i just, knew?’

your heart did backflips at his words, ‘when i first saw you, at the first day of UA, you caught my eye maybe it was the pretty red eyes or the angry face-’

‘I DONT HAVE AN ANGRY FACE’ even his anger made you fall for him.

you’re down bad, you both are.

after your walk along the beach you talked more and walked until you realise it had been hours and you should be getting back to the dorms, somehow this entire time you hadn’t touched hands, it’s not that you didn’t want to you were just so immersed in talking to him it felt like you could talk to him forever.

as you got back to the dorms you stood outside the door and edged closer to him, his eyes sparkled just like they did that day, he entwined his hands with yours.

but instead of feeling the spark you felt a jolt, like a pain and you both pushed apart like magnets.

‘wait.. What, no this isn’t happening i held you this morning, what fucking changed’ he looked at you hurt and in shock, you couldnt breath, it was happening, the one you love but never be able to touch.

‘y/n, don’t fucking cry i’m here, i’m still here’.

‘but you’re not, it’s like we have an invisible box around each other you’ll never be able to hold me, or kiss me’ it was like you couldn’t feel anything but you felt everything at the same time.

‘there’s gotta be a reason, i held you fucking hours ago y/n, maybe it’s that fuckers quirk’

‘bakugou this is what happened to my aunt and uncle, they were fine for the first couple hours until i-it happened’

‘you deserve someone you can hold’

‘but i want you, you’re my fucking soulmate don’t be stupid’

‘you cant even fucking touch me bakugou’

‘call me blasty again.’

‘what?’

‘please’

his eyes were filling with tears, threatening to spill.

‘bakugou, i’m sorry, i love you’

‘then we’ll make this work’

‘we can’t blasty, you know we can’t’

A/N :

🕴i am very sorry for the pain i have caused i made myself cry

taglist :

@todoroki-shoto-is-life @blazedbakugou @luluwiie @blue-gold-demigod-clouds @gazelle-des-pres

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butteraway · 3 years

Text

when time runs out | ii

⋆ summary: A young girl has fallen deeply ill with an unknown disease in her, so with all her free time spent in an empty hospital room, she spends it online playing video games. That's until she meets her cousins friends, one spiking her interest with his extremely vulgare language.

pairing: bakugou katsuki x reader

word count: 2.1k

warnings: small mentions of suicide (I’ll put a star ‘⋆’ on top and below the paragraph so you can skip over it if your uncomfortable, you won’t miss anything too important so dont worry!)

"Bro, honestly I still can't believe that you of all people made it into the elite, number one hero school in the country."

"Waahh, I'm telling you! I'm the real deal Y/N!"

"So, how's your summer been? School's gonna be starting soon, are you excited?" Denki could only smile and sigh as his character was finally killed off.

Said girl chuckled as she heard Denki's voice rise through her headphones as they continued killing zombies in front of them. She grimaced as a zombie attacked her from behind her character. Geez, I never get a break in this game.

"Well, to be honest, nothing big really happened besides me getting my acceptance letter from U.A. Just me training and hanging with the fam." He laid back in the comfort of his bed, headphones still on in order to hear his cousin.

"Aah, already training, hero boy? That's why you haven't been visiting me lately." Y/N pouted and crossed her arms as her TV screen turned black, returning her to the main page of the game.

"Man, we suck at this game!" Denki laughed out loud as he saw how long they lasted in the last round. Y/N smiled and let out a small giggle of her own as she placed down her controller.

"Yeah, how long have we had this game for? It still feels like it's our first time playing this." Denki cracked a smile, even though Y/N couldn't see him.

"Hey, sorry for not being able to come to the hospital. Getting ready for U.A. is no joke, haha." Denki rubbed the nape of his neck, eyebrows scrunching up with regret.

"Nah nah, it's fine! I understand that you have things to do. You have big plans for the future." Y/N brushed a strand of her hair away from her face, looking down at the needles that were plunged into her arms. Her eyes were clouded with an emotion she often felt when talking with Denki. She always felt guilty whenever the feeling came around.

"Must be nice to be able to achieve your dreams." Jealousy. She hated the feeling she got every now and then, but you couldn't really blame her. She lost everything in only a couple of months. Silence passed between the two teenagers, Y/N finally realizing what she said.

"Uh s-sorry about that! I didn't mean to say that alou-" Y/N was cut off by Denki's soft voice.

"Y/N, it's... okay to feel like that. I don't understand what you have been going through, but I know that you shouldn't bring yourself down for something you can't control. You're such an amazing person and to be honest. . ." Denki paused as Y/N's eyes began to glaze over.

"I'm doing this for me and you. You always encouraged me to take any opportunity by, as you like to say, the neck. I-I wanna make you proud, y'know? I wanna make it feel like you're a part of this crazy world, even if you're not really here, walking with me through it all."

Y/N’s lips wobbled as she let out a watery laugh. She hunched over, small tears falling down her face. To someone else, this would've boosted their ego, but to Y/N, those words meant the world to her. No one had ever said that to her before. She felt like she had a purpose in this wretched life of hers. She sniffles were heard by Denki

"H-hey! It's okay, p-please don't cry!" Y/N heard shuffling coming from Denki as he reassured her to not cry.

"I mean it. I only wish you could be there though, it would be so much cooler!" Denki smiled, trying to lighten up the mood. Y/N's sniffles slowly quieted down as she let out a soft laugh that made his heart swell with joy. At least he can make her laugh.

"I'm s-sorry, but no one has ever told me t-that." Small hiccups came from the girl as she calmed down, taking deep breaths to slow her heart rate. Won't want doctors to come rushing in just to see her crying over something so small.

⋆

"I-I'm just really happy you said that." Denki's heart clenched at those words, his chin trembling every now and then. He knew that Y/N wasn't happy with where she was. She had even admitted that she had urges to rip out the needles and slowly lose her life from there. Denki spent the rest of that night talking to her after. To say he was concerned was an understatement. He was terrified when she told him.

⋆

"I think us being able to play games together is already enough!" They both laughed and talked for a couple of minutes before deciding to to hang up.

"Y/N, I mean it when I say I want you to be happy, okay? I hope you feel better tomorrow. Buh-bye!" Y/N said her goodbye to Denki, hanging up and closing the laptop that sat on a movable table.

Her smile slowly left her face, leaving her staring blankly at the pure white wall and mirror in front of her. When visitors were gone, her window would turn to a mirror so no one would disturb her. Y/N took a good look at herself and only sighed. Despite being as healthy as she could get, she looked a bit on the thin side, this complimenting her skin. Running a hand through her hair, she untangled the little knots that had formed there.

"Geez, what happened to you girl? You look like a zombie." Y/N looked at the zombie game and cringed.

"Literally." Just then the door to her room opened and shut quickly, the air filter turning on when a female doctor entered. Y/N watched her carefully as she checked the IV that connected to her arm. The protective suit never made Y/N feel better about her condition.

"Are you alright, Ms. L/N?" The light, stern voice rang through her ears as she looked at the woman in front of her. Y/N gave the doctor a grin.

"Never been better."

It had been an hour since the doctors had turned the lights off, but Y/N didn't feel the slightest bit of exhaustion. She had been sitting in the pitch black room for the time being and was really debating on turning on the TV.

"Ahh, fudge it." Instinctively reaching out for the remote, she turned on the TV and winced as the bright light hit her.

Looking back to the screen, she chose the option of going online and waited for other players to join. While waiting, a new character popped up next to her and she could only smirk at their username. Tapping on her mic, she decided to make conversation with them to see if they also had a mic.

"Now, what to play. What to play..." Y/N had settled for playing OverWatch since she didn't feel like playing any story type games. No cliffhangers tonight, Y/N thought. As the game loaded, she laid back and began thinking about cheesecake. When was the last I ate strawberry cheesecake? Great, now I want some. Thinking about eating cheesecake made her excited about the next day.

"Well hello, dear ol' 'King Explosion Murder_1.' Nice name you got there." Y/N chuckled as she said the name out loud, seeing another player enter.

"Hello 'Tape Dispenser?' What's with the wack name?" The girl’s eyes crinkled as she smiled at their name, hearing the user chuckle through her headphones. 'King Explosion Murder' still had yet to reply, but that didn't bother her. They're either using the bathroom or don't have a mic.

"The name was inspired by my quirk. But what's up with '_DeathGirl_', huh? You good?" Y/N could only laugh at what he said. She should really send him a friend request.

"I’m honestly great, a little tired, but great! I just gotta make up a name, y'know? But your quirk has to do with tape? I don't know if that's wicked or useless." The boy laughed while Y/N laughed as well, losing her grip on her controller. That was until a gruff voice interrupted their laughing session.

"Shut the fuck up, your annoying ass voices are giving me a damn headache." Finally, after being silent, 'King Explosion Murder_1' spoke up.

"Aah, so you do talk. I don't know why you didn't say anything sooner Mr. Explosion Murder." The other player could only sneer at what she said, hitting his desk with his fist. Another player had joined, Y/N only noticing.

"Ah, hello 'Sleep Deprived Controller!'" Said player made their character wave, making Y/N chuckle. While they had their interaction, 'King Explosion Murder' was shouting at her, now realizing that she wasn't paying attention to what he was saying.

"Hey! Listen to me when I'm fucking talking to you, emo bitch!" Y/N’s eyes widened, soon rolling her eyes, watching the game load as they were placed into a match. What's his damn problem?

"Hey man, no need to go calling people names now." 'Tape Dispenser' nervously chuckled as he heard the other player growl. Y/N sported a shocked face as she heard this. What is he, a dog???

"Outta this conversation, extra!" Tape dude could only deadpan at what he was just called. Who calls people extras?? I’m not an extra, in fact I think I’m- 'Sleep Deprived Controller' listened with an annoyed expression on their face, wishing they could shut their shouting teammate up. Damn, wish I actually had a mic.

The game began as all the players separated, going their own way to kill their enemies. Everyone was in the zone, getting items and yelping every now and then if they were attacked. The first to go down was 'Tape Dispenser', then 'Sleep Deprived Controller', leaving both Y/N and 'King Explosion Murder' left on their team. Y/N smirked at their winning team, only one player was left on the other team. Just as the game was going to end, the opposing player shot down 'Explosion Murder', killing him.

"FUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" His mic cut off, causing the two players with mics in a cackling mess. Y/N calmed down, remembering she was still playing, trying to hunt down the last player. Finally, after many curses by a certain player and cheering from another, she located her enemy.

"You better fucking win this or I'll kill you." Knowing he didn't mean that last part, she only focused on the first part. You better win this. Those words echoed through her head as she stopped aiming for the player. She hated being told what to do.

"Ah, so you're one of those people." Not knowing what she meant, they only watched with wide eyes at what she did. Y/N jumped down next to the enemy, shooting them twice with her weakest gun, signaling them that she was there. Quickly, the other player shot her character down, killing her. They lost the game.

"THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?! WE COULD'VE FUCKING WON!" Explosion Murder wasn't taking defeat easily like the other two were. Y/N could only give a grunt of disapproval towards the loud player.

"Ha, why did you just give up right there? You could've easily killed him." Tape Dispenser was just as confused as the other two players, slightly disappointed at the loss. Y/N sighed as she rubbed her forehead.

"Sorry not sorry, but this dude really thought he could get away with telling me what to do. I'll make my move when I'm ready, sorry to disappoint you guys." She sighed as she rubbed her neck, ready to hear the disapprovals of her teammate. But what she heard and saw made her smile.

"Nah, it's fine. It can get a tiny bit annoying with Murder yelling in your ear." Tape Dispenser reassured her, with Sleep Deprived's character giving her a thumbs up. Though, the annoyed sigh caught her attention back to him. Her eyebrow twitched. What is it now?

"I'm done with this fucking sappy shit scene. I'm out." Those were Murder's last words before he disconnected, leaving them in an awkward silence before Y/N stifled a giggle.

"I have a feeling that won't be the last time I'm seeing him." Tape Dispenser chuckled while Sleep Deprived's character shook their head, making Y/N softly laugh. After sending friend requests to both people, she bid them both fair well and left.

Y/N turned off her console and tv, putting the controllers on the table near her. She laid down in the comfort of her bed, thinking about her interactions with the people she met. She smiled, closing her eyes and drifting into a dreamless slumber with only one thought in mind.

King Explosion Murder is such a weird name.

#bakugou katsuki #bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou katsuki x reader #mha #bnha #mha angst #bnha fluff #fanfic

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