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dropsofletters · 3 years

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the whisper in the obvious [bbh]

—summary: she hasn’t had enough time in her life to date because of her work. in order to fill the void of romantic intimacy and domesticity, she lurks online for brief videos or recordings to make her feel better. it works for a while, much more when she finds a man who does boyfriend roleplays—blue moon. it’s not like she’ll ever get to know him, right?

baekhyun doesn’t have much luck in romance. whoever he dates end up either cheating on him or turning their dates into the worst date of his life. growing older by the day, without someone by his side and a job that he hates, he creates a patreon account where he pretends to be people’s boyfriends…blue moon, he has called himself. it’s not like someone he knows will look him up, right?

they’re completely wrong, that’s for sure.

—title: the whisper in the obvious —pairing: byun baekhyun x reader —genre: friends who banter to crushes to lovers!au ; anonymous asmrtist!au ; technician!au ; doctor!au ; meet messy!au —type: fluff ; humor ; angst ; suggestive ; slowburn —word count: 18,768 —warnings: mentions of sex (though the act is never shown on the narrative on itself), alcohol, some descriptions of sicknesses and wounds but nothing graphic.

This is downright pathetic.

Aching limbs flail on each side of her body as she lays on her bed, splayed much like a star as her eyes set on the ceiling. Her earbuds let a manly, somewhat lighthearted voice breathe out words in a faceless manner, straight from a monthly subscription to a Patreon account. Had anyone told her that the only way she could ever get the relief of having a relationship when she became an adult was going to be through a man speaking softly into a microphone about how her day was and what she had eaten, giving vague answers whatsoever, she would have probably given them a laugh.

But life is laughing now, because time runs too quickly during the day when she works in the ER, and it has been well over two years since the last time she had any kind of physical touch with a man. Period. Most times, she doesn’t need it—what can be done by a man to her body can be done by herself much easier, but the kind of warmth that comes from a cuddling session after a tiring day and the endless conversations that come with having someone by her side that she wholeheartedly trusts, only to receive a kiss of comfort at the very end, has long died in her routine.

Now, all she has left is the company of some stranger that has a quite wide fanbase for his boyfriend roleplays—pathetic, she wants to call herself once again, but Blue Moon Whispers does the trick. She gets a boyfriend that she doesn’t have to talk to throughout the day, that cares for her like no one will and a plus, of course, that she’s not the only one that spends money on a man doing this for her.

Pathetic. Pathetic. Pathetic.

Yet, she closes her eyes, tries to even out her breaths when Blue Moon speaks into the microphone. “I’ve been thinking about you all day.” He drags the last few words, a sigh following his statement before he chuckles softly. “My job is so boring. I’m really good at it, but…I don’t know, it’s not what anyone would want to do for the rest of their lives.”

She tries not to wonder about his workplace. Maybe, he’s a nine-to-five worker, or with that voice, he could be one of those telephone workers that pick up sex-lines calls in order to please other people. She could imagine it, there’s some mischief in his tone that tells her he’s not just quite as sweet as his voice recordings.

Humming, she tugs her covers up her neck, listening to more of what he says.

“But enough about me, how was work for you?” Terrible. Working as a doctor is far more difficult than studying for it, and she felt like tugging at her eyeballs when being in med school. Constantly being screamed at by specialists and being questioned by family members when she gives a diagnosis is not quite what she imagined, and her blood pressure is up the roof when she has to save someone last minute. Tonight, she had a patient with atherosclerosis have a heart attack and it was quite possibly the most stressful time of the day. The patient is alive, thankfully.

“I see…” Almost as if he has heard her internal rant, Blue Moon responds. “But I’m here to distract you, aren’t I?” His voice drops at that moment, pressing a kiss into the microphone that has a smile appearing on her features. Okay. Pathetic, has she said that already? She feels like a teenager at this point. “What do you want to watch tonight?”

Her voice gets caught in her throat when she thinks of the first show that comes to mind.

“The Rookie, right?”

Wait, how did he know what kind of show she wanted to watch?

Blue Moon was, quite possibly, the only man that had fit her just right…and that comes from someone who pays a stranger on Patreon to get her dose of domesticity. Her past boyfriends, though not many, always felt lacking. Assholes, for the most part, she adores someone who shows their true colors at the very end and they end up being the most rancid shade of poop-colored brown. The sarcasm is ever present, but all her past boyfriends have been close to pieces of shit, if not entirely so.

It’s not a surprise that she did not try again. Her thirties are only getting closer and she can’t bring herself to put her dating profile out there again. It’s scary, downright stupid and she knows that it won’t ever end well.

“Let me cuddle closer to you—”

Someone shouts her name at the top of her lungs in a sing-song tone, and she recognizes the deep voice quite well. Chohee, her friend and next-door neighbor, is the only person to use her spare key for whatever excuse she has inside her head and invite herself inside her apartment as if she pays half the rent. Just as her fingers fiddle to get her earphones out, sitting up on the bed with widened eyes, Chohee opens the door, pushing her long black hair off her shoulder.

“I brought some cheeseburgers—” At the steady rise and fall of her chest and her disheveled hair—in her defense, today’s day of work had been hell—, Chohee stops speaking. “Were you watching porn?”

What is easier in this ungodly situation of adult life, to admit that she’s hearing a man speaking into her ear while pretending to be her boyfriend, or that she is watching something quite relatively normal? “Yeah.” The latter is easier. She doesn’t want Chohee peeping into her stuff.

Chohee purses her thin lips coated in a glimmer of gloss. “Do you want me to leave you to it or…?”

Well, that option was awkward as well. She could’ve denied both. Shit.

“No, it’s fine. I—It’s not…It wasn’t…It wasn’t doing the trick, I guess.” Locking her phone, she pushes it underneath her pillow before patting the spot in front of her. Chohee takes it without much of a question on the tip of her tongue.

“I hate when that happens.” With that, Chohee tugs at her phone, trying to unlock it—and fuck, she really does know the password. “But I’ve been subscribing to OnlyFans accounts instead. There are some really cute guys there—”

Alert. Red alert. She can’t let Chohee look at the most simplistic of intimacy in the form of an online boyfriend, that only lasts a few minutes to an hour with her. “Uh, Chohee, you don’t have to.”

“No, girl, I have to.” Chohee says, splaying the plastic bag of cheeseburgers on the bed just as she’s reaching forward for her. The taller woman ducks back, trying to unlock her phone. “You haven’t been with a man in a while, I need to help you make your alone time as worthy as possible. I think—”

“Chohee, don’t check my phone.”

“It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I’ve seen dicks. You have definitely seen dicks.” Chohee rolls her eyes just as she takes her phone in between her fingers, but never does she once relent on letting go of it, tugging at it instead. “What’s the problem?”

“I just don’t want you to look at it.”

“But why are you so ashamed? It’s really nothing you should be embarrassed about—”

Between the tugging back and forth, her phone clashes against the flooring, enough to make her widen her eyes when she sees it falling face down. “Shit.” She curses, ignoring the apologies that rake from Chohee’s vocabulary when she lowers herself to pick it up.

The screen is broken and when her thumb presses on the button, the screen lights up in different colors of the rainbow, and she can’t even see the lock-screen.

“Is it broken?”

She scoffs. “Shattered. Broken. Destroyed. What’s another synonym?”

“In my defense,” Chohee says and the chewing that comes soon after tells her that she’s already diving into those cheeseburgers. “You were the one hiding your porn from me. Are you into feet or shit like that?”

She clutches her fists together. “I’m into men eating shit, that’s exactly it.” She replies sarcastically, turning around to watch Chohee staring at her with surprise. A sigh leaves her lips. “I’m kidding, but now I need to get my phone fixed. My patients and other doctors contact me through here.”

Her friend swats her hand in the air. “Baek can fix it.”

Oh, over her dead body.

Byun Baekhyun is Chohee’s best friend, annoyance on legs, too overexcited, the kind of child teachers had a headache for. Baekhyun has been in her life for more than six years, as long as Chohee had been—the man that drunkenly screamed her name at the top of his lungs during her graduation, or the one that almost ran over her foot at his birthday party when he was learning how to drive and didn’t know how to park backwards. Baekhyun, though great, is just the type of person she can’t stand for more than an hour. Let alone for fixing her phone.

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes.” Chohee corrects. “You know he wouldn’t ask you for money just to fix your screen.”

“Still,” Something for free sounds excellent at this time where Chohee interrupted my time with my faux boyfriend and also destroyed my phone in the matter of minutes, but I have to deny it. “You know how Baekhyun is. He’ll probably be asking me a bunch of questions—”

“And?”

“I don’t enjoy people prying into my business.”

Chohee smiles at that, pushing her black bangs away from her small face. “He doesn’t do it with a bad heart,” She tells. “Part of me thinks Baekhyun just doesn’t like feeling lonely, so he speaks a lot just to…have attention. It’s the child in him. Let him.”

Somehow, guilt takes over my body. Maybe, I’ve been too harsh judging the man. “…Okay.” I breathe out, standing up and moving towards the bed, laying parallel to Chohee before taking a bite of her cheeseburger. “Tell him I will be at his workplace tomorrow morning. At like eight, I have a shift tomorrow.”

“Why don’t you tell him?”

Waving my phone into the air, I sigh. “Someone decided to break my phone.”

“Right…”

I can already tell it’s going to be a long week.

###

An engineering degree could only get him so far. Or, if he had completed his time in that engineering program, he may have had his own office by age twenty-eight, or at least, would have had the opportunity for a better salary. Baekhyun had heard it from his mom that he’d regret dropping out of university, but only now does it really become something that he thinks of.

For one, the morning is too dimmed to let the turquoise on his chemise shine brightly—he has to wear the same uniform every single day, tucked inside his jeans, accompanied by a dangling presentation card on his neck. The picture comes from when he was twenty-three, when he started working here, but he has been a technician ever since.

When he opted for this job, he thought he’d be like the others. Spend one year or two here, then flee away for something better. That didn’t happen, and with each portion of his life slipping away from his fingertips, he’s left to find other ways to meet ends as he mirrors himself on the oldest phone technician at his work place.

Suhyuk, above his fifties, working here for more than ten years. His wife divorced him just because he had not moved on with his life, and his children buy Samsung just not to have him fixing their iPhones.

Not even Suhyuk is here at such an early morning. Had it not been for Chohee’s constant texts, he would’ve probably gotten to work a bit later.

Yet, someone is already waiting for him. Chohee’s neighbor, his friend-that-doesn’t-really-want-to-be-friends-with-him, seated on the sidewalk, with her back leaning against the glassed door of his workplace.

“You’re here early.”

She scoffs, standing up when he extends his hand forward. She is not exactly his type, but his eyes rake down her body for a fraction of a second longer than usual. She’s not wearing scrubs, that’s new. “No, you’re here late.” Her fingers point at the watch under her dark denim jacket. “We said seven thirty. It’s eight thirteen.”

Baekhyun runs his fingers through his black hair, playing with the keys dangling from his elegant and long fingers before starting to open the door. “Who is awake at seven thirty?”

“Everyone who has a job, douchebag.” There it is. The name. Baekhyun can practically count with his fingers the number of insults people have thrown at him—all in different occasions and under different circumstances, but the only one he doesn’t feel particularly offended by is the ones she tells him. Douchebag, she had started to call him on his twenty-fifth birthday, when she had eavesdropped on his conversation with Chanyeol about Scarlett Johansson’s tit—

“I don’t get it. Why do you keep calling me a douchebag?” Baekhyun questions, opening the glassed doors and letting his finger twirl against the switch until all the white lights across his workplace brighten the white, spotless place.

She moves behind him, following after his steps and responding with what he can judge as a smile on her tone. “You’re just one.”

“You’ve been calling me that for years,” He says. “And just because I said Scarlett Johansson has nice tits. I didn’t even say tits, I said breasts. I was a whole nerd about it and you called me a douche—”

She chuckles at his words, the melody somewhat foreign. Serious has taken over every portion of her life, and he thinks it has been years since the last time he has seen her actually grin with happiness. He gets behind the counter, taking the phone that she lends him before looking at the screen.

Cracked as cracked can be.

This screams Chohee.

“I know what you said, and it wasn’t breasts.”

Baekhyun looks up, fixing the rounded glasses on the bridge of his nose. “I know what I said.”

“I’ve read enough textbooks to have photographic and audible memory. You said,” She clears her throat then, making her voice a bit higher than her usual tone. That’s not his voice, he thinks to himself. “If I had to convert to a religion, it’d be Scarlett Johansson’s boobs. Can’t believe Ryan Reynolds dated her and I didn’t.”

Taking a small screwdriver between his hands, a smile takes over his features. Yeah, so he was drunk and he may have said that, but— “I said boobs.”

“Breasts, boobs, tits, fat with nipples, it’s all very douchey, if you ask me.”

“I was just saying something that I’m sure a lot of people think.” Baekhyun shrugs his shoulders, his frame looking slimmer on the oversized chemise. Definitely not very fitting for him. “Look me in the eye and tell me she doesn’t have nice boobs.”

“She does.”

“Well, then?” Baekhyun puts the screen to the side, kneeling down to search through his utensils. “It’s not cool that you don’t call me by my name.”

“It just rolls off easier. Douchebag.” She elongates the words then, leaning her elbows against the counter as she tries to connect her gaze to Baekhyun’s. The man stands up then, just as she continues with her train of thought. “As if Scarlett would have dated you over Ryan Reynolds.”

Baekhyun widens his eyes. “You don’t know that!”

“Of course, I know!” She replies. “Ryan Reynolds could break you in half with just one hand and you still think that she’d pick you?”

“I happen to have a nice body, too…you…”

“You’re trying to look for an insult?” With cheeks tinted red, he looks down at her phone, trying to work through the broken screen before his body jolts at the sound of her voice. “You can call me ‘bitch’ if you’d like.”

Wait. Pause.

Baekhyun squints his eyes, a strand of his hair curling against his forehead when he looks at her. “The real question is…do I want to die today?”

“Come on, I call you a douchebag, it’s only fair if you call me a bitch.”

Baekhyun shakes his head, returning to his work. “You’d kill me, and I’m not sure I want to anger someone who knows the human body better than anyone else.”

Truth is, Baekhyun has always thought of her as an ideal when it comes to success. Never giving up, even when her career will never let her stop studying. God, he can’t imagine how difficult it is to read as much as she does.

“If I wanted to kill you, I would’ve done so by now.” The somberness of her voice does nothing to him. He has heard that before, as wicked as it sounds. “Come on, call me a bitch.”

“I won’t—”

“Just once. I don’t want to feel bad.”

“I—”

“Baekhyun, this is the only and last time I’ll ask. If not, I’ll start calling you a bitch myself.”

“Okay, bitch, calm down.” He finalizes, laughter following his statement when he sees her lips parting in surprise. “You told me to say it!”

“That came out a little too naturally—”

Baekhyun squares his shoulders then, ready to throw a joke her way only to see her more annoyed. His specialty. “Maybe, I’ve had one girl or two asking me to call her that.”

She rolls her eyes at his words. “And then you wonder why I call you a douchebag.” She adds. “I can’t imagine one single woman who would like to date you.”

He can imagine a few, but that’s not something she knows about. Baekhyun has always prided himself on one thing—on his voice and his way of getting someone to like him. Only that it comes with a downside: he doesn’t know how to pick the right women. So, more often than not, his dates ended up in disasters, relationships tangled in cheating and of course, how to forget? The day he decided to create his own ASMR Patreon channel for boyfriend roleplays just because he needed some money, only to end up with over thirteen thousand faux partners.

These days, people have wanted him to venture more into a world of rated recordings…and truth be told, his mind wanders. Part of him thinks it would be easier, perhaps more profitable for him, and no one would even look at him or notice who he was. Another part of him feels far too embarrassed. Sure, one thing was recording himself, another thing was publishing it.

“…That’s because you have bad tastes.” Baekhyun conquers, using his screwdriver again before pressing his long index finger to the turn-on button. “I think we’re done with your phone…”

“Bitch.”

“Huh?”

“You were about to say my name.”

“I won’t call you a bitch.” A smirk appears on his soft, delicate face then, merging his features until the screen lights up in between them. The phone is working. “I think you like it a bit too much, huh?”

Maybe, there are some portions of life worth remembering and there is a reason why he is still a phone technician, because he gets to see her otherwise serious expression turn into a laugh when she shakes her head.

“I’d rather be dead than have me in your bed, Baekhyun.” She takes her phone in between her hands, opening her purse just then. “How much is it?”

By the time she is out the glassed doors, blending in her darkened colors with the light, blurring sky, Baekhyun realizes one thing…

She didn’t call him a douchebag. Maybe, it slipped her mind or perhaps, she was nervous when she spat out her last few lines.

Yet, it’s true. He could never imagine the two of them being together.

###

“I’ve officially found the girl who’s going to be in your Patreon with you.”

The Manager Complex, write it in psychology books or Baekhyun may sell it to psychologist in order to get some money, but the concept exists within Chanyeol. Once he had catched a glimpse of Baekhyun’s microphone set-ups and he had to explain the point of his Patreon to his friend, there was no going back. With an agenda on the side of his elongated body, and a professional look on his face, Chanyeol has taken it upon himself to ‘plan out’ his channel…and sure, he’s thankful, but it somehow makes him feel as if he’s a product.

Chanyeol takes a seat across from him on their usual diner. Pink tiles, black and white walls and red tables do make the place justice, but what keeps them there is the fried chicken and pancakes. To die for, and much more if they accompany it with some vanilla ice cream after.

“You have?” Baekhyun asks. He’s not entirely sure if he’s sold to the idea of recording himself with someone else, pretending to be a couple. After all, he’s meant to be the listener’s boyfriend, not with someone else, but more people have joined asking him to be accompanied for heavier subjects on his recordings and truthfully…he wants to expand his horizons a little bit, or he’s, at least, thinking about it. “You can’t just find someone you think is hot and not tell them I plan on recording our voices—”

“She’s more skilled than you, dumbass.” Chanyeol ties his brown hair behind his back, opening his almost-empty agenda before sighing. “I’ve set you up on a date to see where things head and whatnot, but she’s another ASMRtist…and she has done rated recordings, so I’m sure she wouldn’t mind.”

Oh. So, this is real.

Shit, he thinks it could be easy, but when he really ponders about it…there is this tinge of awkwardness and shyness that overtakes him. Sure, it would make his channel grow and hence, give him more money to spend at the end of the day, but he has to take a swig of beer to push down the bitter taste.

It feels void. People like him for pretending he is the nicest boyfriend in the world, borderline fake at times, but at the end of the day, they only want him to either give comfort or fulfill fantasies. None of them will understand him or want to be with him for who he is, or how he is. Loud-spoken, extroverted, sometimes pensive, mischievous with tinges of cheeky.

“Do I have to?”

Chanyeol looks up from his agenda then, playing with the edge of a piece of paper before shaking his head. “Record yourself? No, you don’t have to if you don’t want to, Baekhyun.” He closes the agenda in one go, his frown becoming more profound by the second. “But I do recommend you to go out on a date with her. She’s different from what you normally go for…and she’s cute. There’s nothing wrong with having fun with someone normal every once in a while.”

Looking around the diner, he spares a smile towards Chanyeol. “Okay, I will go out on a date with her.” With how busy he has been with the growth of his Patreon and his real job on top of that, he hasn’t quite gone out much…and that leaves him to take Chanyeol’s opportunity. If he thinks they are a match, then it must be true, right?

“You’re going to love her.”

“If you say so.”

“Cheers for you getting some after a while.” Chanyeol pushes his bottle of beer forward, only to have Baekhyun chuckling.

“Can’t promise that, but cheers!”

###

A thumping headache follows after every sigh that leaves her lips. Somehow, the isopropyl alcohol-scented emergency room does nothing to purify the utmost tiredness inside her body. Instead, she’s left sulking for the number of hours still left in her nightshift. It’s twelve at night and she, still, has to wait until three in the morning arrives to be able to go back home.

She hears a bag of food plopping against the counter, enough for her to lift her eyes ever-so-slowly. Seriously, she thinks she is half-asleep at this point, unaware if she is dreaming or wide awake. Seeing Jaebeom in front of her may be a dream; the second-year dermatology doctor smiling down at her. While he’s radiant, with his long brown hair cascading down his face and reaching his earlobes, wearing the typical white robe and his baby blue scrubs underneath, she has settled for her burgundy scrubs. The ones she wears every single day.

Truth is, everyone is talking about Lim Jaebeom these days. Even the nurses, for fuck’s sake. He manages to send a smile every few days, enough to have everyone going back to their jobs with hope dangling from their every movement, but the rest of the time, his mysterious persona and magnetism is what keeps everyone at the edges of their seats.

Including her. Of course, she’s included. Be damned the day someone decided to put a mole on his eyelid and not expect everyone to fall in love with it when he smiles.

The scent of sliced vegetables, soy sauce and noodles fill the air, enough to make her lick her lips. “Oh, you’re eating here?” She’s about to move away from the counter, make some space for him to splay his meal and sit down, when Jaebeom shakes his head, the waves of his hair moving with it.

“We are eating here. I don’t think I’ve seen you sit down since the morning.” Jaebeom starts to get the containers of Chinese food out of their confines, quirking one of his defined eyebrows in the process. He’s tranquil, he always seems to have his life put together. The envy. “You have a twenty-four-hour nightshift?”

“Oh God, no.” She groans at the idea. She already has had enough of those the past month. “I’m here until three. Or, until Dr. Jones decides to arrive.”

Jaebeom hisses at the sound of her voice. “So, until four.”

It’s common knowledge that Dr. Jones forgets to not turn off his alarm. “Thanks, Jaebeom, exactly what I needed.”

Though, he does bring her something she needed, giving her a pair of chopsticks and dragging a plastic chair towards her, just as he sits down. “I’ll wait here until then, if you need to.”

Dermatologists normally don’t have nightshifts. They’re only there if there needs to be some kind of abstraction of sorts. “You don’t have to. Besides, you shouldn’t be here on the first place.” She tells, looking over at his seated position, long legs extended in front of him, wide shoulders making her retreat her vision and glare back at his eyes instead. Concentration is key when dealing with a man like him. “Did you forget something or do you just enjoy to eat surrounded by emergency patients?”

Jaebeom slurps on his noodles, a few spots of soy sauce sprinkling against his lips. “Seventy-three old patient with a black head on her back the size of my index finger. I had to take it out because Dr. Kim is out for her wedding.” The specialist and the doctor in charge of the residency only now had the time to get married, in the middle of July, for fuck’s sake. “It was awesome.”

The gruesome smile on his face has her grinning back at him, aware of not showing her teeth just in case they are filled with vegetables and noodles. “You have some pictures?”

“You can bet I do.”

Jaebeom pushes his seat closer to her, until his robe is caressing the barely covered skin of her shoulder, pushing his phone towards her face to showcase an old, wrinkly back with a black head being extracted. “She said she got it because she couldn’t reach for her back for the last twenty years and did not wash there.”

“Typical.” Trailing her gaze away from his phone, she nudges his side. “Did it hurt?”

“Not that I know of.” Jaebeom replies, looking down at his food when he puts his locked phone face down on his thigh. “Rumor has it I have good hands.”

There is not a single ounce of mischief on his face, not until a longer second of silence finally settles on him when she tries her hardest not to look down at his hand and think of what he is even trying to say.

“Oh, fuck.” Jaebeom chuckles at his own words, borderline cackling when he shakes his head. “I didn’t mean it like that. I sounded like such a creep.”

“You didn’t.” She replies, trying to conceal the heat on her face. God, she really needs to get her mind out of the gutter. This is her coworker, a fellow doctor— “I happen to have heard that about you.”

Jaebeom tilts his head to the side, half-laughing at her words, as if amused. “You have heard things about me?”

Truth is… “Who hasn’t?”

Jaebeom pulls at some of the noodles with his chopsticks, pensive for a second before plopping them inside his mouth. Not before saying: “What have you heard about me?”

“Half of the hospital is in love with you.” She replies, as easy as possible. The least she can do is let him know that he really does look at good as he thinks he does. “Don’t even get me started on the nurses. I think they have a cult by now. They have started to care about their skincare routines because you told them to. And because they want to look young enough to be by your side.” Most of the nurses at the hospital are over their forties…but who knows? Jaebeom might be into that.

“Really?” He questions, looking down at his food. “I thought they were just being nice.”

“They were,” She accepts. “But they’re doing it because they kind of want to be your MILF’s.”

His nose scrunches up. “That’s a no.”

She shrugs her shoulders. “You never know, Dr. Lim.” She jokes around, only to have Jaebeom expanding his hands in the air, waving them along with the shakes of his head.

“I know one thing and that is that I don’t want those women anywhere near me in that way.”

Attentive of his speech, she hums. “Then, I’ll keep them away from you. I can save lives, what’s one more going to do?”

Jaebeom’s smile tightens at that, resting one hand over her forearm as she chews on her food. “I’ll have to pay you in some way.”

“Oh, no, no—”

“Let me take you back home.”

“You’re not losing hours of sleep just to take me home.”

She had not realized Jaebeom had finished his meal until he placed the empty container back on its plastic bag. “I’ll lose hours of sleep if I let you go home alone at three AM, you know?”

“You sure?” She asks, aware of the shyness in her tone as Jaebeom nods.

“I’ll be your little helper for the next of the shift.”

Somehow, that doesn’t sound so bad.

How can it sound bad when she has practically ogled at the man and swooned at his antics for as long as he has been working here? Perhaps, one year and seven months, even more…

###

He’s a creature of the night, in the way he blends perfectly well with the dark sky, almost colored like the Americano she craves to drink, with his tiredness completely noticeable but still, one with the crickets around him, making a symphony for him. His car is parked in front of her apartment complex, one much better than what she would have imagined—chic, not simplistic at all, coming from his hard work that will only pay off more with the passage of time.

The wind blows on his hair as she pulls her bag over her shoulder, desiring nothing more than to touch her bed, close her eyes and doze off to a world of dreams, white noise and no responsibilities at all. “Jaebeom, thank you so much for everything.” She breathes out into the air, voice lonesome in her approach, unaware of how tired she sounds. “You’re an angel sent straight from heaven.”

“Some say hell, but I’ll take it.” Jaebeom replies quickly, smiling at her with his gums before placing a strand of her hair behind her ear. “Get inside before it gets too cold.”

“Okay, I will.” She starts to walk towards the door, jotting down the password before looking over her shoulder. “I want to wait until you drive off, though.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“You never know, Jaebeom. You could get into an accident. We’re doctors. We know this happens out of the blue—”

“You can always text me to check if I’m alright.” Lacking his robe, Jaebeom rests his hands on the pockets of his scrubs before sighing. “And if you really want to make sure if I’m doing alright, you can check up on me physically on Saturday. I’m free and my friend just opened a Thai restaurant downtown, so…we could meet there.”

She knows better than to think a one-on-one situation means a date. This could be colleagues having dinner together, just to check up on each other, but Jaebeom is not the type to go out alone with anyone. Not that she knows of, and gossip runs around the hospital far faster than stretcher-bearers should. If Jaebeom had been with one of the interns, the students or a doctor, either no one knew about it or he hadn’t, really.

“Ah…it sounds great.” She opens the door wider, slipping inside. After this, she doesn’t think she’ll have enough balls to wait for him to drive off. “You’ll text me the details and we’ll meet there?”

Jaebeom scoffs at her words. “I’ll pick you up.”

“Are you my chauffeur or what?”

“I’d consider myself your date for Saturday, but who knows?” Jaebeom waltzes towards the car, making her hide behind the door as a chuckle leaves her lips. “Maybe, I should ask one of the nurses.”

“Don’t you dare.” She threatens, lingering with a comedic tone.

“Oh, why?”

“You already asked me.” She replies. “And you have a date on Saturday with me.”

“Atta girl.” Jaebeom finalizes, opening the door of his car just as he waves his hand in the air. “See you at work.”

“See you. Good night.”

“Good night.”

Once she closes the door and walks up the set of stairs, she lets herself close her eyes tightly and squeal.

The Lim Jaebeom had just asked her out on a date. That has to be a golden badge after her drought period. Just as she moves through the stairs, she starts to think through outfits, ideas of conversations, anything that could make her first date in a while worth it, but the thoughts inside her head grow less fond of the silence when someone’s voice pierces through the air once she gets to her floor.

Spread in front of her apartment door, seated there, is Byun Baekhyun. The douchebag in all his glory. His hair is done a mess, he rests his cheek on his knees and he’s calling out her name as his eyes widen. Finally, he straightens his back, standing up in the matter of seconds.

Too polished for a simplistic night, he seems to be, with a white button down tucked inside a pair of lightweight jeans. “Why are you here so late?”

She huffs at his words, grabbing her keys with sloth-like movements before moving towards her door. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you that? Why are you here so late and at my doorstep?”

“I need somewhere to stay.” Baekhyun’s voice sounds somewhat pouty and when she looks over her shoulder, ready to glare at the man with the rounded glasses and messy hair, she sees that he is actually jutting his bottom lip out. And is that panic on his face?

“Ask Chohee.” The reply is simple, tugging at her doorknob before the white door welcomes her apartment. Just as she slips inside, she hears Baekhyun pushing the door before she could close it at his face, but not inviting himself inside fully.

“Please.” He begs, his face far too close as his eyes twinkle with a tinge of sadness. “Chohee is asleep, like a normal person.”

“Ask Chanyeol.”

“He has a girl over.”

She rolls her eyes. “Of course, he does,” She mumbles, grabbing her doorframe with her free hand. It’s too fucking late after a nightshift to be dealing with Baekhyun’s dramatics. “Do what The Douchebag would to. Trademark copyrighted and all. Ask to join in and become part of a threesome. Chanyeol is a nice-looking dude and he’s blonde now. Fuckable enough.”

Baekhyun scrunches up his nose at the idea, shaking his head as a shiver goes up his body. “I’d rather have my dick sliced in twenty little bits.”

She raises her eyebrows. Okay, time to play. “I can do that. Medically speaking, if you need me to slice your dick—”

Baekhyun’s shoulders fall then, resting his forehead forward until it almost touches her shoulder. “Okay…” He raises his head then, speaking far too fast for her to comprehend. Typical of him. “Chanyeol set me up on a date and I was dumb enough to ask her to have dinner at my place but she is batshit crazy and she brought wedding magazines over and I didn’t have the heart to kick her out, so I told her I was going to go buy something and I ran away from there.”

Wait.

She tries not to laugh, but the irony of the situation has her tugging at the sleeve of his shirt, pushing him inside when a smile of relief takes over his dulcet face.

“So, you left a complete stranger inside your house?” She asks, plopping her bag down on the floor and moving towards the kitchen to wash her hands. Baekhyun follows suit after taking off his shoes.

“Chanyeol knows her,” He says, as if it’s rocket science. “Besides, I was hoping she’d just go in the morning.”

She hums, rubbing the soap more into her skin. “What time did you tell her you were going to buy something?”

“At nine…”

She gasps at that, looking over her shoulder to see Baekhyun seated by her kitchen counter. “You have been here for six hours?!”

“I didn’t know where else to go!”

Baekhyun may be the life of the party, a socialite through and through, but he can count his friends with the palm of his hand. She knows that. “She’s going to be there tomorrow.”

Baekhyun groans, covering his face. “How do you know that?”

“You’ve given her reasons to be angry, Baekhyun, and she was attached to you already. Now, she’s going to question the root of your relationship and become even more attached because she’ll want to fix what you destroyed and—”

“Oh my God…” Baekhyun trails his voice at that moment, running his fingers through his black locks. “When am I going to have a normal person as a date?”

Cackling, she pats her hands on a towel. The next step is having Baekhyun sleep on the couch, take a quick shower and be off to sleep. “When you become an average person, Baekhyun. You’re just too Broadway for your own good.” She says. “You’ve seen American Psycho? Now welcome Korean Douchebag.”

Though, she still moves towards the living room, opening one of the drawers in her coffee table to grab the blanket she keeps there, just in case. “Says the person that is home at three in the morning.”

Sighing, she remembers the awful nights of working. “I was working since the morning. I had a nightshift, but not a complete one.”

“And you came here all on your own?” Baekhyun must know about her lack of vehicle, because he immediately rests one hand on her shoulder, making her turn around once she has stood up. “That’s dangerous. No one should be out at this hour of the night.”

That reminds her, she should text Jaebeom to see if he’s gotten home safely. “Someone gave me a drive home.”

“Someone?” Baekhyun questions, grabbing the blanket when she tosses it at him.

“Uh-huh.”

“…A guy?”

“Yes, and I’ve got a date with him on Saturday.” She wants to shut out all questions that he may have, pointing towards her couch with an open hand. “You can sleep there until I wake up in the morning. I can’t promise breakfast or a comfier place because you definitely won’t share a bed with me, but it’s warm, at least.” She pauses. “I’ll take a shower and I’m off to sleep—”

“Wait!” Baekhyun says, a sigh ripping from her throat when she turns around to look at him.

“Yes, Baekhyun?”

Standing there, he looks a bit heartbroken, like a puppy after being stepped on or an old man bathed in rain after a car passed by him. Truth be told, Baekhyun is one of the unluckiest lovers she has ever met…and she’s one of them, for all she knows.

“And do you trust him?” He questions, pressing the blanket to his chest. “Doctors are trouble. I mean, Dr. House? Trouble. Derek Shepherd? Trouble. The guy who created Frankenstein? Definitely trouble.”

It seems like someone is worried that she may end up falling for someone who breaks her heart. “Listen, if you mention Dr. House and Derek Shepherd in the same sentence and comparing them to my date, you’re only further enticing me because they’re hot characters.” She shrugs her shoulders, only relaxing when she sees Baekhyun worried expression. “…But yes, I do trust him. I’ve known him for like, two years. He’s caring and serious and sweet. That’s all I have ever wanted on a guy.”

Apart from lack of headaches. She needs the type of love that doesn’t fall into boredom but that doesn’t have unnecessary drama.

“Okay, just…be careful, okay?” Baekhyun asks, and she nods, watching as the man plops down on the couch. “And thank you for not kicking me out.”

Little does he know that she would have never done such thing. “You’re welcome, douche.” She says, turning off the lights after saying her goodbyes with a last: “Sleep tight.”

Though, the light of her phone accompanies her when she types down on her phone:

To: Lim Jaebeom.

Text me when you get home.

Thank you for everything.

If I don’t respond it’s because I have fallen asleep.

And she doesn’t get an answer, at least, not one that she recalls.

###

Nine thirty in the morning and Baekhyun is ready to take off.

Though, his lips remain pursed in concentration, rummaging through her refrigerator for the umpteenth time only to come up with nothing. Seems like she hasn’t done the groceries and hence, he has nothing to prepare for breakfast. Still pretty much knocked out on her bed, Baekhyun doesn’t have the heart to wake her up and take her out for breakfast. Until another time, it may be.

Leaving a note on the coffee table about his whereabouts, he puts on his shoes, extending his arms over his chest once he opens the door to her apartment and closes it behind him. One thought crosses his head at that moment—apart from the quite clear hollow spot in his stomach that begs for food—and it is that he, probably, still has someone in his apartment. A stranger that wants to marry him, and sure, people in his Patreon must feel that same way, or some of them might, but Minjung is a whole another level…

Just as he’s about to take off, the door next to her apartment opens, welcoming the sight of a barefaced Chohee, with her hair high up on her head and a surprised expression on her face.

“Oh, I thought you were—” Just as Chohee is about to say her name, she stops herself. “What are you doing at her place?”

Baekhyun goes over to where Chohee is, resting his hands on the depths of his pockets. “My date decided to plan our wedding ahead and I grew scared, so I left her there and crashed at her place because you were probably asleep.”

“I was,” Chohee rubs her brown eyes then, pointing towards her place. “But I got up early to practice my tarot readings before breakfast.” Baekhyun knows where this is going, and he’s not quite sure he is against it. After all, he doesn’t know what awaits him at his place once he arrives. “Do you want to be my subject? I promise hot cakes and a lot of insight in whatever you want.”

Baekhyun snorts out a laugh. “If you can give me some hindsight on my love life, I promise I’ll be the first one to subscribe to your YouTube channel.”

With one hand placed on her hip, jutted out, Chohee exudes all airs of confidence. “Oh, honey, I can read you like a book.”

Chohee goes all out with decorations. Dreamcatchers in pink, walls a cryptic white, decorations in shades of the most gorgeous pastel colors. There is a pattern and a scheme here, organized to have her tarot space in the living room, with a shelf behind her containing endless stacks of tarot cards packages. Baekhyun is midway through his bite of his honey-coated hot cake when he watches her hands working on shuffling the cards.

“Spirits, what can Baekhyun expect from his romantic life?” Baekhyun can’t help but gape at the choices of words. He will never get used to the word ‘spirits’ whenever Chohee reads him. It’s freaky how she—almost always—gets something right and talks to these invisible creatures. Ghosts? Who knows? “What is Baekhyun’s love story—?” Three cards plop out at that moment, two reversed, one on its original position. Chohee tilts her head to the side, as if deep in thought. “Okay. Spirits, give me two more cards. We need to know Baekhyun’s—” Two more cards come out.

Baekhyun stops munching on the hot cakes, chuckling at Chohee’s expression. “That bad?”

“Horrid.” She explains, fixing the cards into their position. “From what I can see, you’ve met your match already. One of the many soulmates life gives us…” Chohee’s voice trails, as if rearranging her thoughts. “But dude, you fucked it up big time. I get the sense of speech being the source of your match’s disappearance, though not completely, but those feelings train took off long ago. Maybe, you were too silent and unapproachable or too loud and open. I think the latter.” She plays with another card deck, placing it underneath the first line of cards. “There will be a period of separation, but I’m not sure if it will be prolonged. I get an immense sense of indifference? I don’t know, Baekhyun, like she doesn’t care that you’re not together.”

That’s weird. Baekhyun would have never thought of going back to one of his exes. Too much of a hassle. “Is it one of my exes?”

Chohee shakes her head. “No, I think it’s someone you took for granted.”

“I never do that.” Pride swells his chest when he leans back on his chair, legs parted in the process. “I know when to take chances.”

“Not this time. You either get on the ride or it’s taking off without you, Baek.” She rearranges her cards then, clearing her throat.

Curiousness overtakes him. He can’t be the only person in this world who won’t find love, or that has to go back to one of his choices that don’t seem all too factual at this time. He spits out her name, as if it was the second word he learned growing up, and that’s enough to have Chohee frowning.

“I mean, it could be…”

“Not that.” Baekhyun shakes his head. Sure, when they first met, he had initially thought she was one of the greatest looking women he had seen, and he had taken his shot at the time, only to go completely ignored…but that was long ago, and he doesn’t think something would ensue between the two either way. From her part, at least. “What do you see in her reading?”

“Ooh,” Chohee perks up at that, shuffling the cards once again. “Spirits, what do you see in the love story of the second unluckiest person I know in what love consists of?”

Five cards come out almost immediately, taking him by surprise. “Wait, wow—”

“She also lost a match in the past. In her case, it seems like it was ignorance that took part on it.” Her long nail splay on top of one card, he can’t quite recognize it, but Chohee seems interested. “But someone else has come along. Perhaps tired from the eccentricity of past lovers, she wants tranquility…but I see a portion of miscommunication in this partner, too.” She hums in the process, but Baekhyun is long lost in his thoughts. How in the flying fuck is it that the mysterious doctor is the love of her life? Or, at least, one of her soulmates? Sure, she doesn’t believe in tarot, but Baekhyun does…and it’s almost impossible that someone he didn’t even know about is going to be part of her life for longer than intended. “Maybe Jaebeom really is the right choice for now.”

“Jaebeom?”

“The cutest dermatologist I have ever seen. He’s sexy and chic and he has this stare, ugh.” Baekhyun bites his tongue, not wanting to say anything about the fact that there are going out on a date and that, in hindsight, if his stare is enough to have Chohee rolling her eyes back, it may not come as a surprise that she starts dating him, for real.

Why does that bother him?

“And why do you think it’s him?”

Rearranging her cards, Chohee shrugs. “She has a tiny crush on him. Too sly to ever be noticed, but she likes him. She doesn’t do anything to get his attention, though, a complete waste.”

Baekhyun takes one last bite of his hot cakes, rubbing his hands against his pants before standing up. Truth be told, maybe he should stop being a complete douchebag—as she calls him—and take matters on his own hands. Minjung may have been trying to point out to something wonderful and while pushing people away, perhaps speaking too much for his own liking, he has lost the opportunity of living through romance. Hell, the only person he thought he could be sharing his solitude with now has a date and a possible love affair right at the corner.

“Thanks for the food and the existential crisis,” Resting a kiss on top of her head, Baekhyun sighs. “Bye, Chohee.”

The next thing he needs to do is apologize to Minjung.

###

A ding of her phone accompanies her in the silent Saturday night. The swoosh of the wind against the windows of her apartment makes them creak thanks to their oldness, a reminder to bring a thicker coat with herself to her date, but her phone takes away her attention. Perhaps, Jaebeom wants to change plans, or he’s asking if she is ready for their date.

Lo and behold, she’s wrong about both options. A notification from Patreon takes over her screen when she presses down on it, a written post by Blue Moon taking most of her attention. She hasn’t had enough time to check up on his posts, or replay the ones that she had enjoyed the most. Turns out, life continues to move on its axis and if she does get this date to go somewhere profitable and good, she may not need of Blue Moon anymore.

Her eyes read over the post, surprised to see an emoticon at the end. He always uses those, even when his voice borders the depths of comfort when he speaks. However, her heart picks up at the idea that he is plastering on the post. A collab is coming soon, including a famous rated ASMRtist, and she can’t help but let her eyebrows raise.

Luck exists in some people, inherent to their souls, and though she doesn’t know Blue Moon personally, has not raked her pupils up and down his physique in order to judge him as her type or not, she’s sure she’d like him. Enchanting, somewhat funny, mischievous. Boredom is not part of his vocabulary, and he sounds extremely sweet in the process.

And now, she’ll have to hear her faux, online boyfriend roleplay guy get it on with another girl.

She gets out of the application before she can think any further about it. At the most part, she can just skip it. Someone like Blue Moon obviously gets a lot of people to like him, just from his personality alone, so she has no say in this. She either supports or she doesn’t. Besides, she has more important things to take care of, like Dr. Lim, for example.

To: Jaebeom.

I’m ready.

You can pick me up whenever.

Bring a coat. I think it’s going to be cold tonight.

From: Jaebeom.

I’ll be there in fifteen.

To: Jaebeom.

K. Drive safe.

With the passage of time, and the texts they have shared—as well as meals exchanged between the other—, that contact name will be shortened, perhaps sweeter with time, and that’s the natural movement of things. Who knows? Maybe, she won’t need Blue Moon anymore. She doesn’t seem to do so right now, and it’s probably for the best.

###

Pieces of heaven sprinkle on his gleaming pupils, holding cups of ice cream on both their hands as they walk up the set of stairs that lead to her apartment. Cladded from head to toe in black, Jaebeom sports an elongated coat on top of a skin-tight sweater and jeans to match. What brightens him up is his smile, the tinges of sunshine in his speech and the pensive look on his face as she speaks to him.

“It’s funny how whenever we see each other, there’s always food involved.” She tells him, spooning the last few bits of her ice cream before plopping them inside her mouth. Jaebeom’s eyes trail down there, licking his own as he takes the empty cup from her hand to stack it up with his own, finished even before they got to her place.

“You reach the heart from the stomach.” Jaebeom instructs, only to have her chuckling in the process.

“Anatomy by Lim Jaebeom, and wronged, at that.” Her reply has a wide smile taking over his features, his eyes turning into half-moons when he nudges her side, grabbing her forearm before she could lose her balance.

“You’re such a perfectionist.” But truth be told, Jaebeom may just be trying to reach her heart through her stomach, just like he says. Two more stairs and they are in her hallway, the man following after her as she speaks.

“No, but seriously, thank you for picking such a good restaurant. I didn’t know your friend could cook so well.”

“Nah, he just owns it. He can’t cook for the life of him, he just has good tastebuds.” Jaebeom replies, just as she’s rummaging through her purse to get her keys out. “We could go there again.”

“Whenever you want. I’m down.” Her voice comes out softer than intended when she gets her keys between her hands, turning around to point at her door. “You want coffee to wash down the ice cream?”

Jaebeom runs his hands through his hair, his slim arms sadly covered by his layers of clothing. “Coffee at this hour?”

“We’re doctors. I think we’ve all had coffee at this hour.”

“True.” Jaebeom replies, giving one step forward before interlocking his hands together in front of him. “But I think I have something in mind that could keep you awake, since you’re so sleepy and bored during this date.”

Oh no, that’s what her words meant. She can practically hear Chohee smacking her in the head for being so goddamned stupid. Of course, drinking coffee means that she wants a caffeine intake, hence she isn’t feeling as energized. God, she should have offered tea—

“That’s not what I meant.” Jaebeom takes one final step towards her, wrapping his arms and hands around her waist to bring her closer, his taut abdomen flushed against hers, chest to chest as he looks down at her features.

He chuckles, his chest shaking with her own. “I know that’s not what you meant…” His fingers hook a strand of her hair behind her ear, his thumb caressing her jaw, her cheek, before settling on her bottom lip. “I’m just looking for an excuse to kiss you.”

Two years. Two years since the last time she had kissed a man, and even then, her last date’s kissing skills were not the best. Her heart picks up at the idea of touch, craving it because it’s him. The man she likes, or whom she feels attracted to.

“Search no more.” She whispers, resting her hands on each side of his face before pushing herself forward.

Fireworks are not there. They don’t explode right at her face, but tranquility is what she has always looked for. Chilled, relaxed, that’s more of what the kiss is like. Jaebeom takes his precious time to let the finger that was caressing her bottom lip trail down to her neck, grazing the column of her neck before deepening the kiss. Pressed to her door, she grabs him by the front of his shirt, bawling the fabric in between her fingers before she feels a small tug of his teeth against her lips.

He doesn’t take risks. He keeps it simple, sexy, classic. There is not a lot of playfulness, neither does it feel like it has a deeper connection. It is what it is, and that’s about it.

But why does it disappoint her, to certain extent?

He doesn’t say anything. Does not pull away to whisper sweet nothings against her lips, to compliment her or say how much he waited for this. Instead, he keeps kissing, his thigh in between hers, his breath fanning against her skin softly when she runs her fingers through his hair. A raptured moan never makes it out his lips, it rests on the back of his throat and he pushes it down. Bummer.

He pulls away, chest heaving, heart thumping softly while hers is rushing a mile per minute, until he dives in again, her left hand coming behind her to twist the key with as much expertise as she can to get the two of them inside when suddenly, her phone rings.

It’s not a ping. Not a text, but a full-on ring.

Jaebeom pulls away the slightest, stopping his hands on her waist when he says: “Do you want to pick it up?” His voice is hoarse, and even then, it doesn’t reach the depths of her soul. The most she does is make her crave for him, but it doesn’t get past physical need.

“Not really.”

Jaebeom chuckles, scattering kisses along her neck, making her giggle to herself. “Why not?”

“I’m busy.”

“Doing what?”

“I’m not doing anything yet.” The connotations of her voice are clear.

“So, let’s change that.”

When Jaebeom continues kissing her, she expects the phone to stop ringing, but just as the call is over, the contact starts calling again and that is enough to have Jaebeom pulling away again, bloodshot lips swollen from their make-out session, though shortly lived.

“It must be an emergency.” He whispers, and she hums in the process, opening her bag to take her phone out and read the contact’s name.

If someone had seen the devil while being in heaven, this would have been their expression. The one she sports when she sees that, out of all people, Byun Baekhyun is calling her.

He’s the devil. Jaebeom is an angel.

And she’s about to kill him to see if he’ll stay in hell or not.

“What do you want, Baekhyun?” Her voice comes out sharp as she speaks on the phone, sparing one glance towards Jaebeom, but the man is on his phone instead. He doesn’t seem to mind that she’s talking to another man while on their date. He just can’t be this chilled out, right?

Baekhyun has never sounded so serious, but he does at that moment. “I’m in the ER but I won’t get checked if it’s not with you.”

Her heart picks up for whole different reasons, straightening her back as she imagines all the horrible possibilities that could encounter Baekhyun in the emergency room. Her workplace. “Wait, why? Why are you in the ER? Is everything okay?”

“Would I be calling if everything was okay?” Baekhyun whispers for one second, awfully close to a voice she has heard, but she can’t quite pinpoint it when she is already strutting down the hallway, followed by Jaebeom calling her name and trailing after her step. “I broke something.”

“You broke something? Be more specific, douchebag.” Though, she fears what he could have broken. Was he in an accident of sorts?

“My fingers, I think. I’m not sure. I don’t want anyone to see me if it’s not you.” He hisses in the process. “It really hurts and I know you are in your date, but I think I’m about to die.”

Well, there goes the date to welcome Baekhyun’s dramatics. She doesn’t know why she entertains him, or why she is worrying so much. “I’ll be there in a few. Just…stay still and don’t scream or cry or anything like that.”

“Okay—”

She cuts off the call before Baekhyun could continue, running down the set of stairs as Jaebeom repeats her name.

“What happened?”

“One of my closest friends is in the ER and he’s stubborn, so he wants me to check up on him.” She looks over her shoulder at that moment, though briefly, an apology in her voice. “Jaebeom, I know this is not what you expected out of your date, but could you drop me off at the ER?”

A sigh rips from his throat, dangling his car keys in between his hands before humming. “Sure, let’s go, workaholic.”

When down the set of stairs, she presses a short kiss to his lips. No spark, but favorable in feeling. “Thanks, Beom.”

A new contact name arises.

###

Never had she expected to be in this position, holding a folder with Baekhyun’s information as she drags the blue curtains of his small consultation room open. Jaebeom trails right behind her, pulling the curtains closed when Baekhyun lifts his gaze, half-laying on the bed as if his entire body was writhing in pain and it wasn’t only his fingers.

Truth be told, worry overtook her with his call and on the way here. Calling him ‘one of her closest friends’ to Jaebeom had been quite the surprise, too. Never had she thought of Baekhyun in that light—he has always been the one that would never grow up out of the group, but now it seems to be completely different. Maybe, he’s that one leech she won’t ever be able to take away, or she actually enjoys having him suck up blood every once in a while. Metaphorically speaking, he’s just fun to be around.

“Okay, tell me the story and show me your fingers.”

Baekhyun is still looking at Jaebeom, scrutinizing each portion of him with squinted eyes. “Shouldn’t the consultation be private or do my fingers need a dermatologist?” Truth be told, she doesn’t think they do. When Baekhyun extends his left hand, she touches his index and middle finger, barely grazes them in their elongated yet reddened glory, and he hisses in the process.

Jaebeom places one hand on her back. “I think I’ll see myself off.”

She looks over her shoulder, shaking her head. “No, we can continue the date after if you want to.”

“I’m tired and I’m not sure if I want to be working at this hour.” Jaebeom finalizes, ready to finish the date, before he rests a kiss on the crown of her head, bowing his head towards Baekhyun. “Hope you get better, man.”

“Yeah, I sure hope I do.” Baekhyun is never this sharp with his words, but as it seems, he’s not in a good mood. When she tries to flex his fingers, they do. They’re not broken, that’s for sure, every portion of his phalanges feel as though they are in place.

“What happened to you, Baekhyun?” A rosy tone takes over his features when she asks that question, sitting up when a small whine leaves his lips as she continues to bend his fingers, testing their movements.

“You don’t want to know.”

“I’m a doctor now, of course, I need to know.” She tells him, pulling away and opening the folder to check through his information. “And for the embarrassment you pulled me through by both telling everyone in this ER that you wouldn’t consult yourself if it wasn’t with me and ruining my date, I need to know.”

As she’s checking the X Rays, she sees Baekhyun’s fingers, perfectly put in place, definitely not broken. It may be a strain or a tendinitis, it depends on what he was doing. “It’s embarrassing…”

“Could’ve been your dick that was hurting. That would have been embarrassing.” She tells him, trying to ease into his mind before sighing deeply, putting the X Rays down and looking into his eyes. Baekhyun looks like he had gotten ready in a hassle, gray sweatpants and a black t-shirt covering his body. Slippers, too. “Baekhyun, I won’t judge you. I really won’t. I’ve seen worse things. I can promise you this is nothing.”

Baekhyun looks over to the side, fixing his glasses on the bridge of his nose before clearing his throat. “I was with the date I talked to you about…Minjung…” He trails his voice, and she already knows where this is going. This is definitely a sex emergency. “And I don’t know, well, I do know. I was using my fingers…” Baekhyun covers his face, and she tries to stifle her laughter. Oh, she definitely knows where this is going. “Don’t laugh.”

“I’m not laughing.” Though, a small chuckle follows after her statement, enough to sneak a smile away from Baekhyun.

“You sound like you’re laughing.”

“That’s just my voice.”

“You never laugh, what are you talking about?”

“Just tell me what happened.”

Baekhyun winces when he pushes his hands onto his face a little too harshly, left to look up at the ceiling as splotches of red and pink come up from his neck towards his face. Beet red. “It was supposed to be just me fingering her but…uh, she was a little too harsh and she wanted to ride my fingers, and I guess she jumped too hard and broke them.” He closes his eyes tightly, pursing his lips just at the same time that cackles leave her own. “Tell me they’re not broken. I don’t want to have broken fingers, please, it hurts a lot.”

“They’re not broken, douchebag.” There it is. The perfect title, but this time around, the douchebag was the one being played. She takes a pen from the table next to the stretcher. Clicking on it, she starts to write down the diagnosis. “I think you strained a ligament, that’s all. None of your bones are out of place and I don’t feel any substantial difference on your muscles. You can still bend your fingers and they are not particularly swollen. I’ll give you some medicine for that and I need you to ice it for as much as you can. Exercise them, too.” Though, she stops herself at that moment. “Just no fingering, okay? Keep those fingers for yourself.”

“Stop laughing.” He differentiates every word with a punctuation, and she smiles up at him.

“Why are you still seeing her, though?” She slides the prescription towards him, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear when she looks at him. “You said she was too pushy and you didn’t like it. I’m sure you can get other women to finger.”

“I said stop it!”

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop.” She rests his folder on his thigh, getting closer to him to speak in a softer manner. This is her patient and she can’t out what he had told her as so. “Baekhyun, really, stop seeing her—”

“I’m not telling you to stop seeing Dr. Fancy Eyes over there.” Baekhyun juts his chin towards the curtain. “Maybe, I just gave Minjung another chance because everyone has someone and I want to have someone, too.”

Handsome comes short for what she thought Baekhyun was when they met each other. She was twenty at the time, in Chohee’s birthday party, trying t stifle her laughter when he made a fool of himself in front of her. He was drunk, clearly, dancing and swinging his hips in the air as he spoke to her in the most typical of manners. They were younger then, and while she had grown—become more somber and serious with the day, Baekhyun still kept that lively personality of his, matched with some sprinkles of weightiness here and there. She can always count on him for a good stifled laugh.

“Okay, valid. You can keep seeing her if you want to.” She tells him, pointing at his hand with her pen. “But just take care of that, okay?”

She’s about to send him off when Baekhyun reaches for her forearm with his non-injured hand. When she turns around, Baekhyun’s face is serious, void of any of his usual jokester manners.

“Are you sure you’re into him?”

That question is unexpected coming from Baekhyun. At this age, she knows what she wants, but she isn’t sure if Jaebeom ticks off all the squares in her bucket list. “He’s nice. The spark is there.” She lies through her teeth. “He’s a doctor, so he’ll understand me better than anyone else…I think he’s great. And hot.”

Baekhyun nods in the process before sighing. “Haven’t you heard that you shouldn’t date doctors?”

“I have.” She says. “Mostly from you, for some reason, but I’d still do it.”

“Just look at Lee Jinki’s character in Descendants of the Sun—”

“Baekhyun, you give some examples that just make me want to date a doctor more.”

The man gets off the stretcher, standing in front of her before whispering: “He just looks like more of a douchebag than I am. I’m just protecting you.”

That voice. It sounds oddly like Blue Moon when he lowers his voice the slightest, and for some reason, she cringes at the thought. Yeah right, as if she could daydream and go to sleep to the sound of Baekhyun’s voice—

“He’s a nice guy.”

“He looks like he asks for blowjobs on the first date.”

“That’s up to me to decide.” Swinging her hips from side to side, she opens the curtains, only to hear Baekhyun scoffing from his spot.

“Please, not with him. He’s not the kind of person I imagine you with—”

“If you could get your crazy fingers inside someone and interrupt my date to save you, I can do as I please.” Playing around with Baekhyun is funnier than expected, much more when his face falls at those words, turning around to look at him. “Now, give me the keys of your car to drive us to a pharmacy to buy everything we need and then, we’ll stay at my place just so I can check up on you.”

Baekhyun tosses his keys towards her, trusting her with his car completely, and she can’t help but smile. The only man she thought she’d have over tonight was Jaebeom, but turns out that the one who stayed home was Baekhyun.

How ironic life is.

###

Three weeks have passed since the last time she saw Baekhyun and she can say one thing…

Life is a little bit more boring without the man.

It’s funny how the complexity of their friendship is misunderstood, even by herself. When he’s there, she likes to annoy him—and he sure does back—, but when he’s gone, she misses him. Sure, she will never say it out loud, but she finds herself smiling at the thought of jokes that Baekhyun had let out in the air between them. Hence why she rushes towards Chohee’s apartment when seeing his car parked in front of her apartment complex.

She really needs to get a car for herself, she thinks on the way there. Stop procrastinating and become a full-on adult instead of taking the bus every time, but the thought washes away from her brain by the time she knocks on the door and it’s opened by Baekhyun himself.

As always, he’s wearing glasses, vision ruined as it can get, with his black hair messily falling over his forehead. This time around, he’s sporting a rose gold sweater to frame his nicely shaped hips, masculine and defined, just like his thighs. And just when she catches herself looking at his legs, she pushes her gaze to go up. A smirk is already plastered on his face.

“Look who’s here.” He says, opening the door wider for her to enter, but she shrugs her shoulders while passing by him.

“Look who is here,” She repeats, sparing him a glance over her shoulder when he closes the door. “Chohee better get some insecticide for all the cockroaches hanging around in her apartment. All the freaking time.”

Baekhyun crosses his arms over his chest, and since when has Baekhyun sported such a nice body? “You said cockroaches. I’m one cockroach, meaning that we’re a little family over here. And you’re in her apartment, too. So, shame is on you, you called yourself an insect.”

“Don’t get smart on me, douchebag—”

Chohee merges from the kitchen, holding a tray filled with cups of tea. “Don’t tell me you’re starting with your arguments this early on.” Right behind her, her bleached blonde boyfriend emerges. Haesol is a biology teacher, much different from what one would imagine from him, with thick glasses and oversized clothes, in love with someone who believes in everything spiritual but nothing physical. Couples have to be totally different in order to be together, at times. “Sorry, I didn’t know you were here, let me brew you another cup of tea.”

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” She waves her hand towards Haesol. “Haesol, you’re alive!”

“Questionable. Depends on what reality you’re living.”

“Or if we’re living at all.” Continuing with his train of thought, she splays herself next to Baekhyun, who has taken a seat in front of the coffee table with the tray of tea in between his hands. “Sorry I invited myself inside. I was missing you guys.”

Haesol properly sits on the couch, while Chohee excuses herself to go look for some cookies. “It’s okay. You help me accompany Chohee when I’m not here, after all.” In somewhat of a long-distance relationship, she doesn’t know how Haesol and Chohee do it. He lives two hours away, but given to his job, he can’t always drive back here.

“I’m the one that checks up on her.” Baekhyun instructs, taking a sip of his tea after giving Haesol his own cup. “She is never here. She says the incense makes her have allergies.”

“It’s too strong!” I reply, nudging his side before I see him holding his cup with his injured hands. “How are your fingers doing?”

“Great.” Baekhyun replies, a glimmer of blush appearing on his cheeks. “They’ve healed and I haven’t strained them any further.”

“Good.”

“Wait, you know what happened to Baekhyun’s fingers?!” Chohee peeks her head from the kitchen, her bangs falling across her eyes until she moves them away. “He hasn’t told anyone.”

The beam that appears on her features is almost unable to be stopped. Truth be told, she’s not entirely sure if she supports the baggage that comes with Minjung as Baekhyun dates her, but that moment of his life will always be funny to her.

“I do.”

“Don’t you dare tell her.” Baekhyun nudges her side, the scent of him taking over her, musky and mellow. Not too strong for her sensitive nose.

“Why can’t we know?” Haesol asks from his spot, as tranquil as ever, just as Chohee takes the seat beside him. A pillow for her, the kind of tranquil love she has ever wanted, with how he places his arm behind her neck for her to lay on.

She spares one look at Baekhyun. Bright. Shining. Explosive. He’s all the emotions at once, some that she can’t even comprehend and she doesn’t mean to find them out.

“I was his doctor, so I can’t really tell you.” She grabs his hand then, bringing his injured fingers up to her lips and planting a soft kiss on them. “I’d die before compromising these two fingers. You won’t ever get the secret out of me.”

The smile that appears on his face is compliant, wrapping his fingers around hers and giving a small tug before pulling away. “You heard her.”

Chohee sighs deeply, munching on her cookie before shaking her head. “Guys, keep fighting. I don’t think I can stand you two being real, normal friends.”

But maybe, the warmth that spreads on her stomach says otherwise. Being Baekhyun’s friend is not half bad when he looks at her from the corner of his eyes that way, as if his trust on her is never-ending.

###

The pressure of a new relationship’s happy ending is the worst nightmare to ever exist, much more when it feels nonexistent. The covers of Jaebeom’s mattress curl on each side of her face when she is laid down on it, her jacket long thrown on the floor, but what’s important here is the lack of movement. Even when Jaebeom does his best to enthrall her in a kiss, to wrap her up in his engulfing warmth when hovering over her, with his taste becoming one with her own, lemon chap-stick a memory that has long engraved in her brain…they’re stuck in the same position. In the same ‘we are but we aren’t’ dilemma that she is tired of living.

This would have been precious for her when she was younger. With his fingertips scalding the skin of her waist as he tries to pull her shirt away from her body. Boring, it longs to be, with the way attraction keeps them as just that. Just two people who find the other appealing for their bodies, but nothing else…and she doesn’t want that. The only thing she aches for in a partner is having a friend who listens to her but can also make her feel endlessly loved. And vice versa, of course.

Just as a sweet whisper of her name rests on her ear, giving her promises of what may come tonight, her mind goes back to the person she would wish to have hovering above her right now. Making her laugh, perhaps annoying her to bits, but still keeping that handsome face of his intact. Fogged-up glasses, certain fingertips and a lightweight persona. Though Jaebeom does an incredible job at bringing the moon down to this bed with his seriousness and overall concentration, it doesn’t feel like love.

It doesn’t get her going.

Maybe, she just needs a bit more time, needs to feel more of him or let herself be kissed by him, but then again, Byun Baekhyun comes and fucks it all when appearing inside her head. In just at this moment, and she doesn’t understand why. She captures Jaebeom by the cheeks, lowering him down to her mouth to enrapture him in a kiss, but it doesn’t matter how many times she shakes her head or tries to melt her tongue with his, Baekhyun still glimmers as a memory of the unknown inside her head.

What is he doing here?

Her mind must have taken up his name, caressed it in between thoughts and daydreams, because by the time Jaebeom’s hand is on her thigh, lifting it up to hook it around his waist, she breathes out anything but his name.

“Baekhyun—”

Wait.

What?

Her eyes widen, much more at the time that Jaebeom leans back on his thighs. A scoff leaves his lips when he lifts his eyebrows, an awkward smile taking over his features. “Baekhyun?”

“Jaebeom, I’m so sorry—” She tries to spit out, reaching for his shoulder just at the same time that Jaebeom stands up.

“That’s your friend, right?” He asks, earning a nod from head. She doesn’t know why she’s thinking of Baekhyun in such a light lately—the last time that she had thoughts like these about him was when they first met. It’s horrid to see one of her closest friends in such a manner when she’s about to get it on with whom she thought could be the other half of her next relationship. He runs his fingers through his hair, sighing. “Any valid reason why you just called me his name?”

Pushing her shirt up her body once again, she shrugs. “I didn’t mean it. It just happened—”

“You’re thinking about him.” Jaebeom reads her thoughts far too easily. Perhaps, she had let him see the biggest glimpse of it. “And if he’s the one that you want, I can’t do this.” He lifts his eyes to the dark ceiling, the navy walls blending with his dark attire.

What? One thing is coincidentally thinking about Baekhyun. Another thing is wanting him.

“I don’t want Baekhyun. He’s like a friend to me. Just friends.”

“Yeah, so why does he stay at your place whenever he has an issue?” Shit. Maybe, that does sound a bit wrong. As it turns out, Jaebeom doesn’t out his anger, remaining stoic as he speaks. “And why is he the one person you always talk about when you think of something funny? Why is it that you just said his name as we were on my bed—?”

Speechless, she licks her lips, standing up from the bed and taking her jacket in between her hand. “Because maybe, I’m just confused.” She replies, clearing her throat when she stands in front of him. Beauty grazes him, but he doesn’t feel like the man that will cause her butterflies for the rest of her life. “It doesn’t…it doesn’t feel like love with you, Jaebeom and I think that’s not really what you want, so it’s better if we leave it like this. I can’t…I thought I wanted tranquility, but I don’t want deafening silence, either.”

Jaebeom crosses his arms across his chest, looking over to the side, jaw pronounced in a sharp line. “Maybe, you’re comparing me to someone else.” He says. “Not to misunderstand me, I get you…it’s up to you to choose what you want in a man and if it’s me who you want, but…it’s difficult not to believe there is something else with Baekhyun.”

Shaking her head, she huffs. “We’re just friends. I tell you, I don’t know why he was inside my head—”

“You were thinking of another man as I kissed you, that has to be enough of an answer for you.”

It can’t be. Denial creeps up on her when she laughs, taking her purse in between her fingers and tossing it over her shoulder. “Think what you will. I think it’s better if I leave.”

Jaebeom nods, pushing his lips together just as she presses a kiss to his cheek. The touch is barely there, soft in comparison to the kisses they shared. “It was great having you, even for a moment.” He tells her, and she hums.

“Shortest moment of my life.” She replies. “But a good one, indeed.”

By the time she is out the apartment complex, her skin is bitten by the harsh wind, left in a part of the city much too far away from her home. She starts walking on wobbling legs, cursing the moment she decided to wear stylized heels to make her thighs look better, only to end up ruining it by calling Baekhyun’s name. Sure, it was clear that things with Jaebeom weren’t going anywhere, lukewarm, pointless and based in attraction only, but what was Baekhyun doing inside her head while she was getting it on.

Or almost, consequently.

The first person she decides to call is Chohee, but she’s staying at Haesol’s place for the weekend. She keeps walking, rummaging through her contact list, getting hold of some of her friends and getting denied equally. Sure, it’s Sunday, but most people should be home by now—

The letter ‘B’ surprises her then, and perhaps it’s the obsession of not wanting to continue walking and create blisters on her feet, but she calls him. Dials Baekhyun’s phone without a single ounce of guilt within her body, because it’s Baekhyun, he probably won’t answer—

“Douchebag on line, what can I help you with?”

“Mhm, things with Jaebeom are over…” She tries to avoid telling unnecessary details, tugging her pink coat closer to her chest. “And I’m in the middle of the street, away from home, cold and hungry. So, if you’re available…could you come pick me up? I can call a taxi if you’d like.”

“That asshole.” He breathes out, not knowing the complete story and how, in retrospect, she is the asshole in this story. “Don’t you dare call a taxi. Is there any store around?”

Her eyes scan the street before landing on a convenience store. Opened twenty-four hours. “Yes, a convenience store.”

“Good, stay there and tell me the address. I’ll be there in no time.”

###

He can’t physically understand it. Not a single braincell inside Baekhyun’s brain can’t begin to comprehend why someone would simply end a date with her when she looks good enough to break hearts.

Wrapped up tightly in a blanket, she brings the mug of hot chocolate he had prepared for her up to her lips, staring towards the screen as a new episode of The Rookie takes her attention away from him. Truth be told, Baekhyun was in the middle of a recording when she had called—thus, she wouldn’t know Sundays at night are the times he uses to record—, but he couldn’t bear to imagine how Dr. Lim, Dr. Fancy Eyes, Lim Jaebeom, could even think of finishing a date with the one woman that did not even blink at the sight of him.

Well, there are a handful that can’t stand him…but still, Baekhyun doesn’t know what Jaebeom was thinking.

“What happened—?”

Shame takes over her features when she munches on one of the small marshmallows that accidentally slip through her lips. A glare later and the few seconds of silence that follow after, he knows the answer she has repeated endless times since she has gotten here. “I won’t tell.”

With that, Baekhyun plops himself down harsher on the couch, crossing his arms over his chest just after fixing the glasses on the bridge of his nose. Sure, she may look like a daydream on his brown couch and blend perfectly well with the warmth of his home, but that doesn’t give her the benefit to do what she pleases in his house. “It’s just kind of stupid that I picked you up, drove you all the way here, made you hot chocolate, let you thirst over Tim on the screen and you don’t even dare tell me what happened between you and Dr. Douchebag.”

She quirks an eyebrow at that, sighing in the process. “I am Dr. Douchebag. Not him.”

“That’s impossible.”

“I get to be an ass sometimes, Baek.”

“Yes, but only to me.” He looks at her from the corner of his eyes, spreading both his hands behind his neck as he sighs through his nose. “You don’t have to tell me, you know.” His voice lowers, the same tone he uses when he is in the solitude of his home and records himself, trying to make others happy. Pathetic, ain’t it? “…But it’d be nice to know. The least I want is for you to suffer like I have,” He stops himself for a moment, giving her half a smile, no teeth. “And it sucks, to trust someone and have it once again not be the person you want or deserve, but you’re so beautiful inside and out that I truly think it’s his loss.”

Sure, he could tell anyone that she’s gorgeous. Plenty of times had he talked to Chanyeol about how adorable her smile was and how she could have him at her mercy with one twinkle of her eyes, but that’s not something he had told her since that night when they were twenty and he was a little bit tipsy.

She swears he was drunk, but he wasn’t. Vivid enough for him to tell the truth.

“It’s not his loss.” Her voice whispers, husky from lack of use. “Jaebeom is just…too tranquil. It’s good, but it’s not what I want. We can’t let relationships flow all the time. Sometimes, we have to take reigns. I need to stop wanting tranquil, voiceless, silent…because a love that is silent is a love that is not truly felt.” She scoffs at that moment, taking another sip of her drink. “I wish I was like you.”

His palm rests on her forehead, as if testing her fever. “Whoa, whoa, whoa, what did you do with my friend?”

Finally, he steals a smile out of her, dizzy in the way she looks at him from below her eyelashes. “You have always been so honest about the people you like or love. Who you want to have sex with, who you want to date, who you’d marry…you always say it all and you let them know. You’ve gotten your heart broken, but you always cut ties first.” That way, he knows exactly just how wrong she is. Baekhyun has told everyone what he thinks, but not to her. He has never told her just how in love he is with the memories they have shared. In which he has made a fool of himself but still managed to get a smile out of the most serious woman he knows. “The first time I cut ties with someone is because I feel nothing for him.”

“You felt nothing for Jaebeom?”

“Obvious attraction, but who doesn’t?” She shrugs. “Look me in the eye and tell me the man doesn’t have the most gorgeous eyes you have seen.”

Those would be hers, but Baekhyun shakes his head. “Sorry. Got lost from the moment you told me you felt nothing for Jaebeom because those are the best news I’ve heard the past century.”

A chuckle leaves her lips. “Why?”

“He’s flavorless.”

“Totally not.”

“Totally yes.” Baekhyun corrects, playing around with the remote, given that they are not catching up on the episode anyways. “I always imagined you with someone better.”

“Yeah? I always imagined you with a hot ass girl with anime tits.”

“A-Men.” Baekhyun parts the word in two syllables, lifting his hands in the air as if to pray for it just to steal laughter away from her. “You take me as a boobs man only, right?”

“Scarlett Johansson told me so.”

“I look at other things apart from boobs.” Baekhyun says, shrugging in the process. “Even if they are not there, I can like someone.”

“Like what?” She asks, turning on her side and taking another sip of her drink. Cream gathers on her upper lip, and he takes the edge of the blanket to pass it over it to clean it up.

“Intelligence. Rationality. Profoundness. I want a woman who looks like she could never rule the world but has everyone under the sole of her feet. Including me, of course.” Baekhyun’s face is far closer to hers than intended, licking his lips when he looks into her eyes. “I want a woman who laughs at what I say but also knows that I’m more than just a joke on legs.”

Her eyes trail all over his features, before saying: “Those who don’t notice it, don’t know you.” She claims. “You’re far sweeter than you let yourself be known for.”

“Because I talk about tits and I make the magic leave?”

“Kind of.” She replies, a chuckle in her tone. “…And because you don’t realize just how great you are, so you go for whatever woman you think matches you. And you’re wrong. You only deserve the best.”

Heated up to the core of his heart, Baekhyun sighs. “Are you sure you’re not running a fever?”

“I might check. I’m giving compliments to the biggest douchebag I know.” She takes the last sip of her drink before smiling. “Or maybe, I just took your spot and I’m the biggest bitch now.”

Baekhyun pats her head, shaking his own in the process. “Say it. The baddest bitch.”

“I prefer to be the cutest bitch.”

“The most intelligent bitch I know.” Baekhyun replies, pushing himself away when a second too long of silence settles between the two. His hands end up on his waist, extending and flexing his back in order to ease his muscles. “Finish watching the episode while I go prepare the guest’s room for you tonight.”

And with that, he tries to control the beating of his heart. He knows better than to go back to some stupid, childish crush.

###

Turns out that romance is complicated. It either speaks in screamed words or unintelligible whispers, but it’s never going to be any easier. She thought, for once, that going with the flow would bring her happiness and now, she can’t even face Jaebeom without feeling guilt creeping up on her, as well as embarrassment. They are colleagues, after all, and maybe, making out with him for hours to no end leaves little room for her not to think about it happening…but the worst part of it all is when romance starts to go crazy, randomizes a person and then, it settles them inside her heart.

Never would she have thought that she’d think of Baekhyun in such a light that she’d find herself smiling at the thought of him, texting him with more frequency and spending more and more time with him. Never would she have thought that there would come a day that she goes to sleep so fulfilled with the life she has, even when they are nothing, that she would not need Blue Moon—who, coincidentally, sounds a lot like Baekhyun, and maybe, that’s why she was so into him—. She doesn’t need someone to lull her to sleep, because she’s tired of the complete days she’s having. With friends, with work and most importantly, with peace for the decisions she has taken in life.

So, it comes easily to her to hover over that button, staring at nights spent with someone whom she doesn’t really know…and she doesn’t want to listen to anymore. After all, the romantic thoughts inside her head are taken by Byun Baekhyun, and she still has to fix that, because that definitely won’t go anywhere…so, it’s better to start by something easier.

Are you sure you want to cancel your subscription to Blue Moon’s channel?

Accept.

###

Within a month, she already feels like she’s losing her mind.

Why the fuck did she start crushing on Baekhyun?

The tones of the city remain as gray as ever, polished by concrete and the movement of people in monochromatic clothes, but in between what she knows—what she has grown accustomed to, there is some light. Seated by the glassed windows of the small café Chohee likes to frequent once Haesol is around town is this one man that beams with happiness, eyes twinkling behind his glasses. His back hunches in relaxation, toying with the straw on his cup of coffee. She knows it probably has too much caffeine and sugar for his slim, toned body, but there is nothing that ever stops Baekhyun from getting the same order. In between brown woodened tables with red tablecloths, he shines the most, sporting his favorite yellow hoodie, one to match his best friend’s bleached blonde hair.

Haesol finally manages to find his phone, patting his hand against the pocket of his red cardigan until Chohee cuts through the air, interrupting whatever he was meaning to say.

“Not so bad looking when you stop calling him a douchebag, isn’t he?”

Those words take her off guard, putting her hands up her chest as if to protect her heart. Chohee is gleaming, holding onto her boyfriend’s arm as they stand on the other side of the street, covering the sidewalk with their bodies. She shakes her head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“I do.” Chohee confirms. “…You’ve accidentally reignited the old flame Baekhyun and you had the first night you met at my birthday party and now you realize that all that banter throughout the years was undying sexual tension?”

“Banter does not equal sexual tension,” She reports, lifting her index finger in the air. “That’s a wronged conceptualization of romance aiming to make people believe that love can only be fueled if there are arguments.”

“…You two don’t really argue.” Chohee shrugs her shoulders, pushing her long hair behind them. “You just play argue. You like calling him a ‘douchebag’ because it gives you a reaction and a reason not to fall for him. You’ve done it for years because you’re attracted to Baekhyun and it’s easier to believe that opposites don’t attract.”

Haesol tugs at his girlfriend’s arm, pulling her with him to cross the street. She follows right after the couple. “Honey, I don’t think you should be psychoanalyzing the situation. They’re both adults and she should know how to act up on her crush.”

Huh, for someone who is so quiet he can barely be heard, Haesol has some bite to his tongue.

“I am not crushing on Baekhyun.”

Chohee looks over her shoulder once they are at the entrance of the café. “Right,” She drags her voice, sarcasm dripping from every tone. “Because you’re in love with him.”

“Chohee, let it go.” Haesol reasons, opening the door to the café just as she scoffs.

“I am not in love with him. He’s a douchebag. He’d leave me with whoever has a bigger cup size than me, wouldn’t he?”

She knows he’s wrong. Baekhyun is not as stupid as she has tried to paint him out to be.

Which is why she tugs at the collar of her coral blouse upon seeing him waving his hand at her, dragging himself on his seat to make space for her. The way his hair, disheveled as always, curls against his forehead has her wanting to run her fingers through it, calm him down after a stressful day in a job she knows he doesn’t want, but before she could give him a smile—awkward, albeit—, Chanyeol captures his attention by showing him his phone and his grin practically erases off his face.

Weird.

By the time she gets closer to the duo, she gets a glimpse of their conversation. “Chanyeol, I won’t go out on a date ever again—”

“I’m not telling you to go out on a date with Minjung, but we need to find someone with a good fanbase to make some roleplay recordings with.”

The world stops for a few seconds. Actually, it feels like years have passed by right in front of her eyes when she realizes just what Chanyeol has freed into the world. It can’t be possible that the recurrent thought of how alike Blue Moon and Baekhyun sounded could be true. After all, Baekhyun wouldn’t be able to record himself and do boyfriend roleplays just because he feels like it. It shouldn’t—

Everyone has seated on the table, but she stays upright, finally returning to her senses when she awkwardly laughs. “Roleplay recordings?”

Baekhyun hums in the process, giving a small nod as his ears tinge in red. “Well, I need a bit more money and I started a Patreon account, where I do boyfriend roleplays. People want me to expand to rated stuff, but I don’t know, I’m iffy about it.” That’s the moment she lets her guard fall entirely. He doesn’t know it, but embarrassment takes all over her body. All this time, her mind had connected with the same man in different occasions, enough to have her shaking her head when she gives one step back. “Hey, it’s not that big of a deal. Do you find it weird?”

“You were Blue Moon?” Her voice comes out in a whisper, suddenly unaware of the people around her, when Baekhyun’s eyes widen by being caught, opening his mouth and closing it subsequently, babbling to find his voice.

“I—I was…” He says. “We—Were you a subscriber?”

“Oh my God,” She gasps to herself, placing her hands on top of her face to cover her eyes. “Oh God, I just did not subscribe to your Patreon without absolutely having no idea for months.”

Baekhyun chuckles awkwardly, lifting his hand to rub the nape of his neck. “I think you did.”

“I have to get out of here.” Aware of her embarrassment, she moves towards the door, hearing Baekhyun’s footsteps trailing after her.

“Wait, no. It’s okay! I just—It’s flattering!”

“For you, definitely not for me.” She replies, turning around just as she opens the door to the café, sparing him a glance before groaning deeply. “Shit, how couldn’t I notice that the similarities were there?”

“I guess you didn’t really think I would go for a job like that.” Baekhyun gives a gummy smile, biting his bottom lip soon after. “Can we just talk about this—?”

“Sorry, Baek.” Shaking her head, she clears her throat soon after. “I don’t think I’m ready to talk about this right now.”

With that, she closes the door behind her, perhaps choosing to ignore all opportunity she has had with Baekhyun, but what is she supposed to do? Admit the crush that she grew both on a faceless man speaking sweet nothings into her ear and her friend? It’s too much turmoil for just one afternoon.

###

Another card ends up under her boot when she steps inside her apartment. The thirteenth one since the last time she saw Baekhyun, coming daily for thirteen days straight. She’ll give it to him, the man is smart enough to keep her on the edge with these cards, but each and every single time, she folds them over and places them in her coffee table’s cabinet, there for her to read once she doesn’t feel like the world is falling on top of her.

It’s horrid. Awkward. Awful in a lot of ways. She can’t look at him in the eye and suddenly tell him that his voice was the one that calmed her down in so many nights but that past that, his personality was the one that captured her whole, made her dream of him and think him into her life as a memory she never wants to get rid of. For fuck’s sake, she lost the opportunity of having something with Lim Jaebeom just because she was absolutely head over heels for Baekhyun.

Her friend.

The douchebag.

When, all along, she has been the douchebag in everyone’s life.

Just when she closes her door behind her, she hears a thud and a whine following soon after. That timbre of voice makes her turn around, sparing a glance towards the door before peeping through the peephole. Much to her lack of delight—though, some relief washes over her—Baekhyun is standing by the door, wearing that terrible turquoise chemise that he uses for work and somehow, not angered that she has probably bruised his face when he holds the bridge of his nose between his index and thumb.

“Ouch!” He hisses, pulling his fingers away and sighing in relief when there is no blood. “You know, I know the ER is the best place to find you, but I’m not sure I want to break or strain any other part of my body.”

A smile appears on her face, though she tries to push it down, resting her forehead against the door as if that manages to make her get closer to him. “Baekhyun, what are you doing here?”

“Getting injured, apparently.” Baekhyun huffs out in annoyance, letting go of his nose to splay his hand on top of the door. She swears she hears his palm softly hitting the surface. “…I kept pushing notes under your door for the past thirteen days and I thought you were ignoring them, but you didn’t even read them on the first place.”

She’s not the best of people, what can she say? But it’s stupid to believe Baekhyun would ever feel anything back for her. They are total opposites, and he has already spoken about what he wants in life to her. He wants someone serious, intelligent, put-together. She’s a mess of misconceptions and unspoken words.

“I don’t want to get attached, Baekhyun.” She says, turning around to look towards the rest of her apartment, with her back leaning against the door. “I subscribed to Blue Moon because I wanted to feel less lonely. Well, I subscribed to you…and I spent months wishing I had someone like him, and then, I questioned why I wanted someone like you. Why, when being with Jaebeom, I could only think of you and only pushed him away by comparing him to how much flavor and spice and humor you brought into my life…” Her voice becomes distant, heat flaring around her face when she clears her throat. “And I painted a sky for me when I didn’t even know if you wanted to be a star in it. I suddenly realized just how stupid I was for thinking I had a chance, with Blue Moon or with you.”

Baekhyun stays silent for a few seconds, trying to twist the doorknob to no avail. “You really haven’t read the notes, have you?”

She sighs. “You don’t know how embarrassing it is to be in my position. I like you, Baekhyun. Fuck, if I want to be with someone, it’s with you and it’s pathetic—”

“Check the goddamned notes.” He says, calling out her name soon after. “If there’s someone who knows perfectly well how pathetic you feel, it’s me and truthfully, there’s no reason to.”

“You’re just saying it because you’re my friend.”

“No, I’m saying it as me. As Baekhyun. As the guy who sent you those notes.”

Her hands grab the pieces of paper in between her fingers, scrunching up her nose as she unfolds them. “What even are they, Baekhyun?”

“They are the thirteen times I didn’t tell you how much I liked you. From the moment I met you to now,” The more she reads through the letters, she sees glimpses of his mind through the years. From age twenty to now, Baekhyun had a whirlwind of emotions, never quite knowing what was a joke and what was meant to be much more. “And you always said I was a douchebag, not because of what I said about Scarlett Johansson, but because of what I said the night we met because you thought I was drunk but fuck no, I had never felt more sober in my life.” Baekhyun breathes out, just at the same time that she skims through the letters, getting in the information. In the past years, Baekhyun has liked her several times, getting over it only to move on to something else, but he always comes back to the same spot. “I meant every word and I mean it now. Don’t be embarrassed for liking me when I’m the stupid guy who has liked you for so long—”

She opens the door then, not caring if she’s a mess or the notes splay on the floor when her fingers caress the skin of his waist to bring him closer. Baekhyun feels like home, not too tranquil but rapid instead, a lake trying to move her off her boat as he grabs her by the back of the neck with one hand, digging his fingers on her hips to keep her closer. She molds into him as if made for each other, and maybe, they were, but she had always been too stupid to notice that there was more to Baekhyun than what he said.

In his silence, his whispers, his nothingness…that’s where he shined the most. When the jokes died down and all there was left of him was his sweet personality, though imperceptible at times, that was when she loved him the most.

When she pulls away, he leans in for a few more kisses, stealing a chuckle away from her when he continues to do so. “Did you just kiss me?”

“I guess I did.” She smiles, wrapping her arms around his neck to hug him tightly. “Shit, Baekhyun, you weren’t supposed to wait this long to tell me you liked me. We could have had our happy ending so long ago—”

With a movement of his legs, he swings the two of them side to side. “Well, it’s difficult to tell someone could like you back when they always call you a douche.”

“Sorry.” She pulls her face away, capturing his soft, thin lips in between her own before humming in delight. “But I’m not telling you go now, douchebag.”

He shrugs. “It’s never too late to start.”

###

The collar of his sweater fell off one shoulder, collarbones peaking out as he brought the same glass of champagne he had been drinking from up to his lips. Chohee dragged him along the masses of people in her party, wearing a tiara out of all things, as she spat out whatever nonsense she had inside her head of finding Baekhyun’s perfect match. Running a hand through his disheveled hair, he played along. It was not like he’d really find love in a place like this.

Though, when he saw her, dressed from head to toe in black, standing by a corner as she talked to Chohee’s new affair, Haesol, he thought he saw a glimpse of heaven. One of those angels that no one dared talk about because of their power, with a smile barely playing on her face, too difficult to get out, as she batted her eyelashes as softly as possible with every word she heard from Haesol. Her concentration was immaculate, unlike him, a little bit tipsy with flushed cheeks.

Chohee called out her name, one that he thought he would never forget, with her hand resting on Baekhyun’s shoulder. “…This is the guy I had been talking to you about, Baekhyun. We went to high school together and he’s been my sidekick ever since.” Chohee explained, and the woman was kind enough to extend her hand, stealing a breath away from him and settling a challenge on the top of his head when seeing her. He wanted to have her, but it was almost impossible—he knew this from just one glance. Difficult as difficult could get.

“Hi, nice to meet you. Chohee hasn’t stopped talking about you.”

“Well, I hadn’t heard about you but I wished I did.” Baekhyun spoke, taking a sip of his drink when he shook her hand with his. Soft, strikes of electricity going up his arm when they touched. “Nice to meet you, too. I’m Baekhyun, or your future husband. Whatever you want me to be.”

A laugh ripped from her throat then, continued by a wheeze, as she moved her hand away from him. “Okay, douchebag, that was smooth, but good luck with that. I’m not much of a dater.”

Baekhyun shrugged then, as if knowing something more. “Give me time, I’ll make it happen.”

And he did.

#baekhyun scenarios #baekhyun #exo scenarios #exo #kpop scenarios #writing #baekhyun au #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun angst #exo au #exo fluff #exo angst #this is an idea i got out of nowhere so #tell me what you think lol

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3raaaachachacha · 3 years

Text

All members x female reader / 2.3k words / angst / fluff / suggestive

Warnings: jealousy, teasing, suggestive themes

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Bang Chan

Not going to lie, Chan was a little bit on the fence about it. He wouldn’t necessarily have a problem with you having guy friends, but there would have to be a clear communication between you, him, and your male friends in regards to boundaries and respecting your relationship. Though it sometimes still worried him, not so much you exactly, more so the people around you. He’d trust you to go out with them as long as you’d let him know how things were and would checked in. At times, he wouldn’t be able to help the jealousy that coursed through him. He’d always try his best to stay calm and remind himself that it meant nothing and you were just friends, but sometimes his mind wanted to mess with him a little.

Just to ease that jealousy that was coursing through his veins, he’d probably pop past where you were hanging just to check things out for himself. This was normal since he just wanted to make sure you were alright, no matter who you were with, he just got more possessive when it came to another male figure in your life that wasn’t him or your family members. Chan knew it was bad, but he couldn’t help himself, he would get too worried, but thankfully, you knew all this. There was never an issue when it happened since you knew it was all with love and concern from him, and honestly, you loved that. Someone always checking in on you in case something was to happen. You always knew that Chan would be there for you and that made you feel protected whether he was there or not.

Lee Minho

When Minho saw your male best friend take your hand to drag you up to the bar for another drink, he would not be happy. Who was this guy grabbing you and why were you smiling? Once you got back, he would pull you aside before asking you what the fuck that was. His hands would be holding your waist tightly and would make sure to clearly show that you were his to whoever this guy was. You would giggle at Minho’s jealousy before smacking his chest lightly in a playful manner and telling him that that guy was your best friend from work. He would chuckle a bit to himself before licking his lips and scolding you before walking away to get a drink in embarrassment.

He knew that girls and guys could be friends, but he wished you had told him that sooner before he put on his manly pants and began parading around the bar. He didn’t want to embarrass you in front of your other coworkers just because he was jealous. You would go up to him before placing a kiss onto his cheek and taking his hand in yours. After he got his drink, you would drag him over to your coworkers before introducing him with a big smile. He would be embarrassed, but thankful that your coworkers were nice people, even your male best friend was nice to him. Minho would come up to you and whisper about how you would pay later that night for embarrassing him in public. You’d only shrugged your shoulders and continued to have fun until the inevitable punishment you’d get from your boyfriend.

Seo Changbin

He wouldn’t mind as much only because he knew of your male friend and that you had been friends for some time. Changbin trusted you and that’s what was most important between the two of you. Changbin wasn’t one to get jealous from types of things, but he was one to definitely remind others that you were off limits with a subtle hickey. He has a good amount of female friends, so he would see no problem with you having male friends, but he would jokingly remind you that he was better than them, just so you’d never forgot it. Changbin did have a possessive nature to him, so he liked to have a hold of you somehow. It would also help with the little nerves he had at times.

You always told Changbin what you were doing and who you were hanging out with and always offered him to tag along, so he couldn’t get mad at you for that. If anything, he only felt a little off if they were to touch you in some way, then he’d have to intervene. Other than that, he trusted you more than anything and he believed that you could be friends with anyone as long as they respected your boundaries. Thankfully for you, your boyfriend got along well with all of your male friends. Sometimes you did like to tease Changbin with some comments about your friends, just to get some kind of reaction out of him, and boy was it so worth it. He’d happily remind you of who you belonged to and to not even bother trying something like that.

Hwang Hyunjin

He wouldn’t like seeing you with another guy, not even for one second. Hyunjin knew that this was your best male friend, and he had nothing against girls and guys being friends. Something was just off about the guy and he was going to get to the bottom of it. The game night was full of Hyunjin showing small gestures of public affection towards you through hand holding, thigh holding, kissing your cheek, and back hugs. He wanted your best friend to see that you were taken and happily taken with saying that. You could tell that Hyunjin was getting jealous for no reason since he was being clingier towards you, but honestly you didn’t mind it one bit. You loved when he got jealous.

He never got mad at you since he knew you weren’t doing anything but standing there and being beautiful, so how could he be mad at that? You still made sure to pull him aside and reassure him that your friend was just a friend and nothing more. You would also tell him how you loved him and if he wanted to go you’d go with him. Hyunjin would appreciate that more than you’d ever realize. After saying your goodbyes to your friends, on the way to the car, Hyunjin would push you up against it before placing his lips onto yours in a passionate embrace. You weren’t sure what had come over him, but you loved it, only fueling him further by tangling your fingers into his long locks. It was a miracle that you even made it back to the house instead of just having a quickie in the car.

Han Jisung

It wasn’t like Jisung didn’t know about your childhood best friend. He was actually the one who introduced the two of you to one another before you started dating. There were just times when the two of you would interact and it would make him jealous. It could be from an inside joke the two of you had or when he hugged you a bit too tight. There were certain things that annoyed Jisung since he wanted to make sure that your connection stayed strong between the two of you. Jisung was your best friend, even better friends than your childhood best friend, since you were intimate with him in every possible way. You always could rely on him over others, but that didn’t mean his jealousy wouldn’t show up from time to time. Thankfully though, Jisung wouldn’t get upset if his jealousy spiked, he would get pouty and a bit sad more so.

You could always tell when it happened since he would become quiet and could cling onto you more than usual. He wouldn’t want to overstep his boundaries since he knew that your male best friend wasn’t trying to hit on your or anything, he just wouldn’t know what to do or say when he became uncomfortable. His anxiety would definitely act up a bit, but after being together for over a year now, you knew Jisung like the back of your hand and knew exactly how to calm his nerves. Words of reassurance or small public displays of affection were the best ways to smash his jealousy right off the bat. The two of you would always talk about it after it happened and he would usually realize how immature and stupid he was being. You thought it was cute when he got jealous though since it showed how much he truly loved you.

Lee Felix

He would be the least jealous of all the boys since it's normal for girls and guys to be close in Australia, but not be dating. So he’s used to seeing it and not assuming the worst before getting an explanation. It did make him a bit uncomfortable when the two of you were walking down the street, only to have you be pulled out of his grasp and into the grasp of another males. Thankfully, you were laughing which was a good sign and you quickly explained to Felix that this was one of your really good friends from college. Felix would immediately relax, not fearing the worst that you would be kidnapped or something, but then he did notice how the other male looked at you and he was not happy about it. He was good at keeping a smiling face for show though and continued to do that as he laced his fingers back into your grasp to secure you next to him.

He loved how you quickly introduced him as your boyfriend to your male friend. Felix thought it was cute how proud you were to be dating one another and he was happy whenever the two of you got the chance to show another off. He would be kind to the other male by saying a few words before placing a kiss to your cheek and ushering the two of you off to the rest of your date. He would mention to you later that it was a bit weird what your friend did, but he wouldn’t really show his jealousy much. It would be a bit till you even noticed he was jealous, but thankfully, he would talk with you if things got worse from his jealousy. Felix likes to talk about things that are bugging him rather than hold in the pent up tension he feels.

Kim Seungmin

He would get more uncomfortable then jealous when your male friends would hug you or touch you in some way. He was still young and didn’t have many friends that were girls, so seeing you be so close to people of the opposite sex was a bit weird to him. He wouldn’t be mad or anything, but he would make sure to hold your hand tighter when you would be talking to your male friends as he simply sat back and nodded his head along to your story or smile at you when you turned to him. Seungmin never wanted to make you feel like you couldn’t be friends with others no matter who they were, he just needed to become understanding that everyone could be friends at this point without liking one another. Girls could like girls and guys could like guys, so why didn’t he worry about that too?

After he thought about that thought one night, he realized that he shouldn’t feel uncomfortable or jealous when you were with your male friends as long as you were being loyal to him and there weren’t any suspicious signs. He trusted you though. Seungmin knew that you were in love with him just as much as he was in love with you. He just made sure to show how much he loved you a bit more after the incident by buying you flowers more often or visiting you at work for lunch or having late night dates after practice. He liked doing small things to show how much he loved you to try to compensate for whenever he did get jealous and to try to overcome those thoughts. You knew what he was doing since it happened so suddenly, but you weren’t complaining. Any chance you could get to be with your boyfriend you’d take.

Yang Jeongin

He would be similar to Felix, but there were times where he would slip up unconsciously and get jealous. Jeongin was still young, but he was pretty mature for his age and realized that girls and guys were going to be friends and it was more normalized today than before, which gave him a bit of an advantage. That didn’t mean that he wouldn’t get jealous though and that he wouldn’t grip your hand tighter when he could clearly notice one of your male friends were flirty with you casually in front of him. When your male friends did things like that, that’s when he would get annoyed and jealous that other men just thought they could disrespect your relationship right in front of him. He would get an attitude and would give short answers back to them about needing to leave now since you had a date to get to, leaving them a bit confused.

You knew that your male friends were harmless, and all of them knew about your relationship, but just were naturally flirty people. So you would need to reassure Jeongin about that and make sure he knew that you would never leave him for one of your male friends. You thought of them all as brothers at this point and hated them at times, but you never could hate your boyfriend. He liked to hear these things since it made him smile, even when he was trying not to. He couldn't stay annoyed long, but would remind you to tell your male friends to knock that shit off before he gets mad and does throw hands at them. You’d only laugh and honestly you’d hit one of your male friends before allowing Jeongin too. You knew he was jealous, but you also thought it was so cute that he was so protective of you.

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- Admin 🦋 Admin 🌶️

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jay-and-dean · 3 years

Text

Don’t look down, Baby Part 1/3

Dean x reader

Summary : Dean told her to ignore the “thing” between them and to jump in any guy’s arms. Any of them but him.

When we think of a guy our Y/n could be with, longing for Dean, it’s usually a nice dude, a little boring, right ? Because who can compete with Dean ? Now, what if this guy was as badass as Dean ?

Characters : Dean Winchesters, Sam Winchester, Reader, Abraham Hale (OC)

Warnings : Angst, jealous Dean, Smut (unprotected sex -you’re smarter than this !-, oral, also kinda lame sex if it’s a warning), cheating, swearing, smoking, drinking... More warnings in the second part.

Wordcount : 6k (yes, just the part one... now you get why I cut it.)

Note : So for the Aestetic, I used the face of Jax Teller from Sons Of Anarchy, and you have to know, even if Abraham Hale looks like him, he is totally an OC.

This is writen both in Reader and Dean’s Pov. Dean’s thought are in italic.

Text divider by the talented @talesmaniac89

Jay’s Masterlist

September 16, 10:33pm

Dean’s POV

I always thought that when Y/n finds a guy, it would be the perfect douche I wanted for her. Some nice dude named Robert, a cop maybe, or a realtor with a friendly family.

He would annoy me to death with his stories about growing up in a farm, and call her Pumpkin. He would worry a little when she goes out with us because he thinks we drink too much when we’re together.

He would tear her from me and I would hate him for that. She would skip a hunt to meet his parents, another to spend a few days in the cabin he rented… But even if it breaks my heart, it would be exactly what I want for her, so I would let her go.

I had it all planned.

But, of course, she didn’t play by the rules.

And that guy is no Robert…

His loud manly laugh tears me from my thoughts. His tattooed hand wraps around his whiskey glass and I turn my head to that waitress that always gives me warm smiles, she’s staring at him now, with the sweetness that was once for me.

Abe.

Ex-gang member, Abe. Bad guy turned good. Raised by the widow of a gang member, in a violent environment, he already had a criminal record at fourteen, started selling guns before he was officially allowed to drink, ended up in prison at Twenty-two.

Sweet smile Abe. Reformed bad boy with an attitude. Became a hunter after he met a vampire gang and slew them to the last. Now defender of the good citizen, he found his fight, and the hunters talk about him as one of the bests.

Afraid of nothing and ready to fight, charismatic, alpha Abe. His muscular arm in the back of my girl, his long blond hair falling on his face when he lights up a cigarette in a grunt of content while she touches his neck.

Abe. My new nemesis.

“So Dean” he says with his deep voice hoarse from smoking too much. “How did you meet my girl ?”

I met her on a hunt, invited her to my room and took her on that wall. Do you remember, Y/n ? Don’t look down baby, look at me.

“On a hunt.”

“That’s how I met her too” he smiles and kisses her temple. “Seems like we have a lot in common.”

“Looks like we do” I state.

Her eyes darken and she turns her head, I know how to read her, she is pissed, and I don’t even know why. I did nothing, I said nothing, and her rock-and-roll version of prince charming is worshiping her, so what causes that bitterness ?

What is it, baby ? Am I missing something ?

“So I heard your brother and you have this fucking palace ?” he gives me a corner smile, smoke coming out of his nose.

“Who told you that ?” I grunt.

What is the point of a secret bunker if it is as secret as a freaking tweet ?

He chuckles and takes a sip of his whiskey, not answering.

Abe never answers all the questions he is asked, maybe it is some cool thing for guys like him, maybe it is his way of look mysterious or powerful. What is sure is, as annoying as it is, it freaking works. But each time he smirks with his eyes lost in the bottom of his glass in a little huff instead of speaking, I get closer to losing it and smashing his pretty face on the table.

“I told him” she says almost coldly. “Like you did all your friends, Abe is my boyfriend, Dean.”

I nod. What can I say, she’s right after all. She’s always right…

She was right about that cop being the bad guy the first time we hunted together, right about the fact that my so-called bond with Amara would fade the second she gets whatever she wanted. She was right about Jack being a good kid but dangerous enough to need to be watched and educated instead of pushed away. Right about Mary hurting me more than I admitted…

She was right when she said I was wrong. The day I told her we shouldn’t sleep together again, that she should just ignore that thing between us and jump in any guy’s arms. Any of them but me…

I really say that : any of them. I did.

Did you choose Abe just to annoy me, baby ? To prove a point ? You had to bring a guy who would beat me at my own grumpy-loner-badass-crap-drink-too-much game, right ?

“That place sounds sure awesome, because Y/n keeps coming back to it” he states, not letting me know the true meaning he puts in that sentence, his piercing blue eyes free of any emotions on the surface.

“Well it’s home for her” I say, and that bastard chuckles. “Is it funny ?”

“Not at all !” he says with a warm and kind laugh, and a friendly tap on my shoulder. “You should relax Dean, you look like the bar is full of demons !”

I stay stern, I know I should probably look friendly, but I rarely hated someone nice that much.

He gets up and kisses her head before he walks away, his manly way to move catching women’s attention, and some men’s too. One of his hand goes through his blond hair while he walks to the bathroom with the other hand deep in his jeans’ pocket.

“So… Abe, huh ?” I ask, the second he’s gone.

I should be more coherent, I know. I want her gone, but I want her for me. I was sure I was ready to see her with someone else, it’s been three years. Three years ! After we only made love six times. She is not mine, she never was.

And I thought calling her Baby in my head would make me strong. It’s a weird feeling, like I could let her be happy, but still feel special. I would have been the passion of her youth, the one that died young and of which she would think a little when she rocks her baby in her pretty house…

I had somehow romanticized my heartbreak.

But that doesn’t feel romantic at all. And all I can think of is that he is passion too, I’m not dead, and I just have to see him touch her and imagine them at night…

“Yes” she says, still with that bitterness in her voice. “You could make an effort, Dean. He has been nothing but nice, and you act like he’s an enemy.”

“I haven’t decided if he is one yet.”

She rolls her eyes and shakes her head in disapproval.

I recognize hurt. My Y/n, when she’s hurt, she gets angry. Always. And I made her angry so often. Her irritation is growing, I can see it in her burning eyes.

“You can’t do that” she says low. “You can’t treat him like that, no one gives you the right.”

“And him ?” I dare asking, staring at her reddened face. “Does he treat you right ?”

Her eyes fills with tears again and her jaw clenches.

“Better than you did, you mean ?” her words feel like a stab in my heart.

Reader’s POV

I didn’t want to say that, it came out by itself.

I’m thin-skinned lately. I feel like I could cry or scream any moment, all the time. My emotions have always been loud, my sensibility overwhelming, but for a few weeks I’m drowning.

The fact that I decided to try to get over Dean Winchester probably caused that.

A long time ago, I thought living with Dean without ever having him would be the worst, then I saw him with other women and was convinced I was mistaking before : the worst was definitely that. How wrong was I ?

The worst is having had him. Not once, but several times, each time a little more intimate. More kisses, more touches, more suspended seconds watching in each other’s eyes… Until we spent that night together, that last night, and he fell asleep against me for the first time.

It was over. It was too much for Dean, and not enough for me.

Dean Winchester can’t belong to anyone, not again. He doesn’t want to be a boyfriend, and he doesn’t want me to be his girl ; who am I to insist ?

“Well, that’s a minimum” he answers in a soft groan after a little while, and my heart breaks because I just did what I swore I would never do : Reproach him for any of it.

“I’m sorry” I sigh, thinking of those weeks after the last night, when I had to hide the worst pain I ever felt because I didn’t want him to feel bad about not wanting me.

I still do... -feel that pain and try to hide- because Abe or not, I still live with Dean and he doesn’t deserve to carry my pain on top of the world on his shoulders.

“Can you at least try ?” I beg, low, seeing my boyfriend getting out of the restroom but stopping next to the door to talk to someone he obviously knows.

“Yes” Dean answers. “I’m just… He’s a hunter and…”

“He’s a good man” I assure him, looking at Abe walking toward us above Dean’s shoulder. “He comes from a dark place, like us, but he is a good man.”

September 21, 08:12pm

“That place is crazy !” Abe says, sitting at the table of the library. “I have never seen anything like this.”

While Sam tells him a little more about the bunker, I look at my boyfriend.

I stare at him, trying to get rid of that uncomfortable impression, that feeling screaming that he doesn’t belong here ; because if he doesn’t belong in the bunker, then he probably just has nothing to do in my life.

A lot of memories cross my mind, like it happens a lot lately.

The memory of entering the bunker for the first time and deeply knowing that, as long as I am welcome here, this would be my home. Because it just feels right and because, even if I’m not the granddaughter of Henri Winchester, he trusted me with this place, as much as he trusted his family. That man actually welcomed me like Mary never really did, like I was just as legit as blood.

At his frank smile, the memory of meeting Abe crosses me too. I was alone in this hunter bar, trying to get information for a case. I hadn’t told Sam and Dean that I would go there, because I know how much uncomfortable the hunter community makes them. And I was introduced to him : Abraham Hale. I found him so beautiful, with his mischievous smile that seemed to mock the entire world, his wheat blond hair and his tattoos. Something felt so safe about him, not because he looked like a bad boy, but because he was light and happy, laughing at everything and taking nothing seriously… All that Dean wasn’t.

I loved his wild energy right away. Abe was like the drums in a rock song, like summer wind. In his arms, I forgot about Dean for a few seconds a day during the first weeks. We spent days sleeping and having sex behind the curtains of that motel room, hiding from summer heat, and nights drinking and listen to rock music...

But now I look at him, his bright blue eyes seem pale next to the deep green looking back, and his beauty is bland.

“Thank you for showing me your home, Treasure” he says, putting a tender hand on my back like he always does.

And my eyes cross Dean’s.

I know what he’s thinking, he’s cringing at the nickname, and that reminds me why I am with Abe : Dean never gave me a nickname, he never called me anything else than my name, he will never and even when others do, he thinks it’s lame and cheesy.

Dean’s POV

That hurt on her face again.

Baby, you can’t look at me like that each time he calls you Treasure . I don’t like it, but you’re supposed to do.

This is much harder than I thought, and I was aware it would be impossible.

Each and every one of his actions makes me face my own contradictions : The more loving he is, the more I want to push him away from her. But the more she seems distant and to have her head in the clouds, the more it eases the pain. Am I selfish enough to hate her happiness even though I love her ?

I was in control, during those three years not touching her, my heart was aching with craving and my soul was screaming at me to make her love me. But as much as the heartbreak was constant, I had chosen it. I was in control.

I never realize that it was only bearable because she was still here, my partner, my best friend, my roommate. Mine.

Now she took it back. She raised her middle finger right in my face and decided she wouldn’t be mine anymore.

And that is a whole new level of pain.

I don’t sleep when she’s not home, and sometimes food just won’t let me eat it. She texts during our movie nights and wears that pendant he gave her. I hate that pendant because it reminds me I never gave her a present. Not once in all those years.

“Another drink ?” Y/n asks him with the bottle in her hand.

“Don’t you drive ?” I cut him before he answers and I see her eyes shoot me with imaginary bullets.

I’m sorry Baby but it’s movie night tonight, can’t he just leave already ?

“He’s right” she says giving me a little hope that she will ask him to leave soon. “You should stay for the night.”

My breathing gets stuck in my lungs.

No Baby, don’t do that to me. Please.

“With pleasure !” he smiles.

September 21, 11:49pm

Reader’s Pov

He grabs my thigh to lift it a little and grunt in my ear. His kisses are hot on my neck, his heavy body moving cautiously on top of me.

My eyes are on the ceiling, my hands on his sweaty muscular back and I wait.

Damn, what is happening ? He’s close, I am going to fake it ? I swore I would never fake, I swore if the guy can’t get me there, he should know, but… Abe is not the problem, I am.

I just watch the ceiling wondering what is wrong with me. He did everything right, nice foreplays and those love words he always has for me. But nothing seems to turn me on anymore, and without the need and the pleasure, his thrusts are just uncomfortable and I feel weird.

Come already.

I sigh. I know what is making this impossible. Dean. This fucker is the last I had in my own bed, the only one in fact. And everything reminds me that Abe is not Dean fucking Winchester !

“You okay Treasure ?” he pants in my ear, nibbling at it.

I’m not a freaking snack, what is it with his mouth and teeth always ?

“Yes” I fake a moan. “I’m close Abe, come.”

Just don’t be loud, that would be so awkward.

When he loses rhythm, I close my eyes at the relief, it won’t be long now, make it stop. He shakes a little and grunt loud, filling the condom inside of me ; and, to make my fake moans credible, I clench my walls around him one time or two, rolling my eyes at his proud groan.

Sex with Abe used to be so much more than this. I'm getting frustrated. Did I break something in me ? Why can't I enjoy anything anymore ?

He rolls on my side, panting, and smiles tenderly at me. He’s beautiful, I have to admit that, and he’s nice and loving.

“You’re amazing” he hums. “I guess I can’t smoke in your bedroom ?”

“I don’t mind” I answer sincerely. “The air co is magical, just, don’t smoke more than one.”

He sits on the bed to get his pants, his beautiful tattooed back on me. The smoke flies in pretty wreath. I put my hand on the lion tattooed on his back. It suits him, with his solar attitude and his confidence, his beautiful blond hair…

Yet I keep longing for my wolf.

Dean’s Pov

Now I know I could kill him. And now I know what the limit amount of pain I can take is.

I pace my room like a crazy man. He is taking her, my Baby. He is sinking inside of her and stealing pleasure. Does she wrap her legs around him like she always did with me ? To push me deeper. Is she as responsive ? As lost in pleasure as she was ? With that way only she has too beg for more with her entire body, voice strangled and arms caging me the best she can…

Is she…

“F-fuck…” I whine, holding my heart.

I think I just felt it break.

Baby…

Breathing is painful now, I feel like I’m drowning.

Baby… Why did you have to do that to me ? I know I hurt you but your revenge is unbearable.

I sit on my bed, still holding my chest.

I can’t take it, you know.

“Shit” I grunt.

How can this kind of familiar panic attack be back ? How can this hurt so much ? It’s not Hell, it’s not Purgatory…

“It is Hell” I say out loud.

Loosing you, Baby. It’s Hell. Do you love him ? Because…

“Fuck, I love her” I whine.

September 28, 06:05pm

Sitting in my “Fortress of Deanitude”, I wait. The tray with snacks is there, beers too, and Netflix is ready for our next episode of Stanger Things.

But there is a big chance she won’t come. Our movie nights are getting rarer and rarer, like our time together in general. And this place is slowly becoming a Fortress of Solitude…

You never know how much you need something until you lost it, right ? I was stupid enough to think I could be stronger than the need for her and now look at me, alone in that big empty room in a bigger emptier bunker.

All I can think of is how much each day pulls her closer to him and further from me. They are building memories in which I’m not, they are building an intimacy that I lost three years ago. She will forget me and he will have her, maybe even make her change a little, until one day she is among those people who talk about their personal tastes by saying “we”. “We prefer red wine”.

Ew.

Is he going to change my girl, for real ? Make her love Led Zeppelin a little less, make her a little less her, make her want other things, another life, need me less ? Our things will become unimportant and be replaced by all kind of other things I have no idea about.

I take a long sip of my glass. It’s not like I had my word to say anyway. I lost her. I lost her in the worst way possible : willingly.

But just when I’m about to get up and go put the snacks away, she opens the door, panting a little, like she had ran.

“Dean” she says entering the room. “I’m sorry. There was an accident on the road and the traffic was disturbed.”

You were at his place, Baby, and you ran to me ?

A little smile lights up my face when her presence revive my heart.

“It’s okay” I say.

“I’m late, but I have…” she takes her hand out of her purse. “Giant skittles !”

“You found them ?” I smile, sitting straighter when she hands me a bag.

Our things are not all gone. And she still cares about me and about our time together.

“Yup ! I made Abe stop in every shop yesterday.”

So you think of me when you’re with him, Baby ? Have you ever thought of me while he was inside of you ?

“Sit” I pat the armchair next to mine. “Let’s find out if Dusty’s girlfriend exists !”

“I really hope !” she exclaims, taking off her jacket.

I try not to look at her, but when she quickly takes off her jeans to slip in her pajamas pants, I swallow hard. Those thighs could have been for me, and I could have watched the show while holding her.

She sits with her knees up against her chest in the big chair next to me, and takes a beer. My eyes are glued to her, looking for anything unusual, and fearing it more than anything in the same time.

“What ?” she calls me out of my thoughts.

“Nothing, I…” have no idea how to finish this sentence.

“I’m still okay you know ?” she says without looking at me, playing with the label of her beer bottle. “You always stare at me like something had happened to me. I know what you think of Abraham, but he doesn’t treat me bad.”

Reader’s Pov

“I’m sorry” he sighs. “You know how protective I can get. Especially with you…”

A chuckle escapes me and I know he doesn’t like it, but protective with me ? He broke my heart. He ripped it and threw it on the floor because I had said those words.

“Yeah…” I nod, nibbling at my lip. “You won’t find bruises on me.”

He doesn’t answer.

When did we become like this ?

After a silence, he hands me candies and presses play. But, chewing on sugar and my eyes on the screen, I keep my full attention on him.

I have everything any girl would want : A lover with hot blood, beauty and a heart of gold. But I'm not any girl, and the only thing I want is Dean Winchester. The genius who thinks he's dumb, the scared little boy who lost his mom, the leader, the victim of his fate, the killer, the loyal friend, the rebel, the torturer, the perfect brother, the wary hunter, the crappy dancer ; grumpy Dean, childish Dean, stubborn Dean, all of Dean...

I look at him and my eyes travel down his neck, his beard is fighting to grow back there but I know he won't let it. The slow movements of his chest are mesmerizing. My eyes go down, to his thighs and crotch...

I really shouldn't let myself look there but his smell and aura are like a mermaid song and I'm drowning. His strength is radiating of him and I feel myself respond to it in everyone of my heartbeats.

He could make me scream. He always did, so easily. Dean made me cry of pleasure more than once, sometimes without any effort, the brushes of his fingers, the burning of his kisses... And when he finally buried himself inside of me, it was like a firework in Heaven. He never had to do anything really special...

And now I wonder : Is something broken about me ? Abe is passionate and loving, we used to work great, he was easy as whiskey. And he loves me. Why am I unable to enjoy any of it lately ?

My eyes trace the bump in Dean’s pants and I remember the simple ecstasy of feeling his cock twitch for me. Dean... I bite my lip to hold back the moan hanging on my tongue. His thigh moves a little, strong muscles hidden in his jeans, and I think of his stomach contracting that time he came on my tongue. I…

“I see you” his deep serious voice hits the air like thunder.

I look up to meet his eyes and realize I have been staring at his crotch, licking my lips and probably visibly holding back moans.

“Do you need something ?” he asks with a proud aura on his face.

I want to punch that expression off of his perfect features.

I look down and sigh. Yes, I do. I need him, not only want like I would like to think, but need indeed. I need him to feel my body, to make it alive, and to hear my soul breathe again.

“Dean…” I just say.

Like it was an answer or reproach but of course, he hears it for what it is.

A call.

So he gets up, suddenly so tall that he eclipses the TV, the light and my will. He comes in front of me, standing there, making me look up timidly through my lashes. His strong hand lands cautiously on my cheek, gently holding my face while I lean on his touch.

I can resist him. I can.

I think of Abe's sweet smile, of his deep voice and his arms around me. I think of this night he told me about jail and I tried all I could to make him feel safe again, that was a beautiful moment... We are something beautiful Abe and me. We are going to make it right, to make it count. Right ?

As my heart fights itself, playing all the love songs I know at once in my head in a deafening dim of emotions, my eyes fill with tears. I know what is going to happen, and the cruel god writing my story can stop there, the end is already obvious.

I can't resist Dean. I just can't.

And Abe will cry, right ? He trusts me. He will take his bag and yell maybe, the sun inside of him will get clouded, he will drive away. Then I will let my body slide on the door frame, unable to hold my weight up, because I will have broken the only man that ever truly loved me.

I look down to hide the pain from Dean, but he knows me better.

"I can leave" he says.

But it's the last thing I want because I miss him, I miss him like a part of me died years ago and I still feel empty and cold... I miss him when I'm alone, and even more when I'm not.

When he's about to move, take a step back to leave me alone, I grab his belt and hold him in place firmly. I have no plan, no solid thought, but I know I can't be away from him for now. He smells both like the most familiar home and the wildest dream.

My other hand grazes the fabric of his jeans on his thigh, I close my eyes for a second and a little whimper escapes me. I started touching Dean less than a day after meeting him, and it seems I can't be around him without having my hands on his body.

He hums, staring down at me, bow legs slightly parted like he needed balance, like he was gripping the floor for both of us. Dean had always been my anchor. His shoulders look wider from down here and I want nothing more than letting my hands grab his butt to rub my cheek on his crotch like a cat marking its territory.

"Touch me like you need it, Baby" he murmurs and a little sob escapes me unexpectedly.

He never ever called me Baby.

He never gave me any nickname like he never gave me the place I thought I could take in his heart. And Abe, he calls me Treasure. He welcomed me in his heart...

"What's wrong ?" Dean asks like he didn't know.

Dean Winchester is the world's greatest hero, saved basically everyone's life without any reward, and for this he is a saint ; and still, he's the one that is going to be the end of me. Hero or not, he's my villain.

"Everything is wrong, Dean" I answer in a broken voice. "Everything."

He squats in front of me and my hand panics at losing my grip on his belt so it grasps his flannel like my life depends on it.

"Not everything" he whispers, bending to let his poisonous lips graze my skin.

My treacherous mouth opens in reflex at the proximity of his, making him respond by biting my lower lip. I whimper again and pull him closer.

"I got you" he states, letting his burning lips trace down my chin and my neck followed by his thumb, scratching my skin with his short nail. And I catch fire.

I let my head falls back and I surrender totally.

That's how bad he is for me : I could let him break my heart again without an hesitation, after it took me years to recover just enough to just function. And oh, I will. I will shatter the heart of the man that trusts me just to let Dean selfishly remind me how much I love him.

His breath is burning my skin, spreading in the fabric of my t-shirt when he buries his face on my chest, opening his mouth wide to pretend to bite my breast, hand cupping my sides like he had missed me for real. I let go of the plaid fabric to grip the short strand of his hair like I can.

"Dean..." the moan I have been holding comes out, filling the room with sin and the echo of future lies.

"I got you" he repeats.

His hungry hands seize my jeans and tear it open, fighting the metallic button's resistance brutally. The fabric hurts my lower back in a last resistance but is ripped off of me the second after, taking my panties in its way.

And before I can sit straighter now that I'm on the edge of the chair, before I can talk, think or breath. Dean's anaconda arms grab my thighs firmly and his burning breath is on my folds.

"Wh-" I start but what can I say now.

He kisses my folds like no men ever did : like he was in love with that part of me. An open mouth kiss, tongue eagerly lapping my juice from my entrance to my clit.

"AH !" I scream, arching my back but Dean doesn't take a second to breathe, burying his face on me.

I squirm, licking my lips like I was kissing him back but the place he is devouring can only respond with throbs and getting soaked, which is does.

I'm panting, I'm being eaten by the flames of that indescribable pleasure that is back. My stomach is shaking, my temples are beating so loud. I suck a breath when he sucks at my clit, moist hand gripping the leather of the chair.

"Dean" I moan again in the subdued light of the warm room.

He answers with a hum, and his nimble tongue pushes at my entrance, making my thighs shake violently in the vise grip of his arms.

I can't escape what Dean does to me so I let go.

My whole body falls backward when I come, harder than I have in years, holding his hair so tight it might hurt him, legs shaken by electricity, back arching and chest fighting itself to breath. My sensible clit seems to have nerves in my whole body and I fall silent, covered in sweat, suffocated by a forbidden crushing orgasm.

I whimper desperately, limp and lost, panting in the chair like I didn't realize yet what just hit me. But Dean knows what he's doing, he knows where this goes.

He opens his jeans, I can feel it even though I don't see him, my head still back, moaning at the caresses of his tongue on my neck. I bite my lip hard, hand moving from the arm of the chair to his, to feel his eagerness.

And he grabs my thighs harshly, making me fall on the floor with him and holds my back when I can't, keeping me against him.

"So wrong..." I whisper in a dying echo of my disgrace.

His hand grasps my face firmly and makes me look at him. His eyes have this fire in them, he clenches his jaw when I roll my lips a little, wetting his craved cock on me, dying of being finally filled by him.

"Keep your eyes on me" he groans, grabbing his length to guide it at my throbbing entrance.

"Dean..." I moan, fingers reaching his stomach under his clothes to feel it tremble.

"Eyes on me baby" he repeats low.

Dean's Pov

She can't think of him. Not now. I need her with me, I need her for me.

Feel me, baby.

I smile slightly when she dives her unfocused pupils in my eyes. She's perfect and I love her ; but I must say when she seems to surrender so completely to my touch, that's when forgot why I asked her to stay away.

When I enter her, her phone lights up once again in her back, on the floor. I groan loud as she wraps me like only she can, like she was trying to suck me inside her core. She's shaking, she's fighting to keep her eyes on me and I'm fighting that urge to grab her phone and shatter it in a million pieces against the wall.

She gasps, her body threatening to fall back so I hold her.

That's it baby, stay with me, feel me, let me take you like I used to when you were mine.

My hand fists her hair and my mouth gets attracted to her pulse point so I bend to suck at it, barely thrusting for now, just enjoying to be inside of her, feeling her pulsating with desire, the concrete hard floor digging in my knees.

Her arms wrap around me, she cling to me and I try to ignore my jealousy shouting at me.

Baby, you try to ignore me but can he do that to you ? Can he turn you into a purring cat like that ?

"Dean" she moans, clenching around me, her thighs trying to get herself even closer so she takes me impossibly deeper.

"Say you want me" I murmur against her skin in a voice I barely recognize.

"I want you" she gives in, exhaling in my ear.

Behind her, her phone lights up one more time with a text : "I found us a case in California, Treasure."

=> PART 2

FEEDBACK IS GOLD

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usergreenpixel · 3 years

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JACOBIN FICTION CONVENTION MEETING 4: IN THE REIGN OF TERROR: THE ADVENTURES OF A WESTMINSTER BOY(1888)

1. The Introduction

Well hello there again, dearest readers! I’m back at it again and this time I brought you something more obscure.

Honestly, I would’ve never found out about this book had I not seen the category for books set in the French Revolution era on Wikipedia after a deliberate google search.

“In the Reign of Terror” is an adventure novel aimed at young boys that was published in 1888 by one G. A. Henty, an English novelist who has other adventure novels to his name too, but today we’ll only take a look at this one.

It’s available on Project Gutenberg in the ebook format and is in public domain so it’s free to download, which is how I obtained the book.

2. The Summary

The book takes place in the French Revolution era, specifically from 1790 to about 1792. It tells the story of Harry Sandwith, a boy whose physician father sends him from London to Burgundy to live with Marquis de St. Caux and his family.

As the brother of the Marquis had been cured by Harry’s father during his stay in London, the entire arrangement was his idea. The Marquis himself also believes that by having an English companion, his sons can learn a lot about English customs while Harry learns the language and the traditions of France.

But as the Revolution is drawing nearer than ever, clouds gather above the heads of Harry’s host family and Harry himself...

This is the basic premise of the story, but how did the finished product turn out? Let’s find that out for ourselves, Citizens!

3. The Story

Now, at first the story itself seems a bit implausible on the level of the premise. The Marquis believes that his sons should learn a thing or two about masculinity and sports from Harry, as English boys are supposedly more manly than their “feminine” French peers.

I find it hard to believe that a French nobleman would think this way but I was still willing to suspend my disbelief somewhat because Anglophiles do exist and despite the rivalry between France and the UK, the two countries did borrow bits and pieces of culture from each other.

Here’s the part that gave me pause and kind of ruined the experience for me. The entire book reeks of a sense of English superiority. Harry, the main character, is English and is portrayed as the bravest, strongest and most masculine member of the cast, while his French companions, Ernest and Jules, the sons of the Marquis, are basically treated like feminine “sissies”.

(Spoiler alert!)

For example, in the beginning of Harry’s adventures, the daughters of the Marquis are attacked by a rabid dog and who saves them? Harry, of course. This is one of the instances where the author demonstrates how strong English boys are and this is the moment after which Harry is finally seen as an equal by the noble siblings.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for patriotism and taking pride in your country. I’m Russian and proud of it. However, too much pride and you get this obnoxious sense of superiority. If you need a prime example of how that usually plays out, look at the Axis during WW2.

What Henty chooses to portray is specifically a sense of superiority. Characters like Harry’s father take pride in the fact that England has less strict class divisions, that apparently English commoners have already obtained more liberties while the French peasants are merely a mob of bloodthirsty savages, etc.

Don’t know about you, Citizens, but I really don’t like such narratives shoved in my face and considering how often this nationalism shows up, I had a lot of trouble getting through the story.

I’m all for healthy patriotism that acknowledges the good and the bad in one’s country but this is just too much nationalism for me and I believe that the book would’ve been more enjoyable without this narrative showing up every couple of pages or so like jumpscares in a bad horror movie.

4. The Characters

I know this was the 19th century so the audiences were probably not pampered with complex stories and characters as much yet, but honestly I didn’t find Harry a truly likable and relatable protagonist.

(Spoiler alert!)

He starts out as a pretty average school student but while in France he proves to be heroic - killing a rabid dog, slaying a man eating wolf (not completely by himself) and generally always proving himself to be the manly hero that Ernest and Jules can never be. Basically it was easy to predict that he will emerge from any trouble victorious so I didn’t have many reasons to be worried about him.

The sons and the daughters of the Marquis all end up liking him. Too much may I add.

In short, I personally got a bit of Harry Stu vibe. 😉

He does have one glaring flaw that unfortunately doesn’t do him any favors in my eyes. The English superiority complex that the author expresses in the story shines in Harry brighter than the Sun. He doesn’t express much empathy either.

(Spoiler alert!)

When Harry saves a man from getting attacked by an assassin and sees that the man is scared out of his mind, the first thing Harry feels towards him is disdain for apparently being a “pussy”. Um, hello, Harry?! How would you react if you got attacked out of the blue! Not everyone is as “strong and manly” as you are!

Then Harry also regrets saving the man when it turns out to be Robespierre. Our protagonist, dear Citizens!

Speaking of Robespierre, here (and this goes for most French characters) he is portrayed as a weak feeble “sissy”, thirsty for blood but neat and frugal in outfit and lifestyle, someone who won’t hesitate to have half of France slaughtered. Of course. 🙄

The female characters are bland helpless ingénues. Also typical of the literature of the time period.

By the way, Robespierre is the only revolutionary who is actually featured in the story. Marat and Danton are mentioned but it’s all negative in their department too, especially when it comes to Marat.

The Parisian crowd is little more than a bloodthirsty mob of savage uneducated peasants ready to slaughter all nobles just because they’re well, nobles.

Honestly, nothing new here.

5. The Setting

Honestly, I feel like there weren’t that many descriptions and those that were present simply weren’t vivid enough to immerse myself into the story. Too many descriptions are bad too, of course, but here the opposite happens - too little descriptions so sometimes the surroundings feel like vacuum and there’s not enough world building to imagine yourself in that era, beside the characters.

It’s all just bland caricatured setting one would expect from an amateur puppet show at daycare.

Remember, dear Citizens. Even if you write about your own era and country, world building is extremely important so please don’t underestimate the power of good and vivid descriptions, just use them in moderation.

Anyway, onto the final point.

6. The Conclusion

Despite all the drawbacks, I didn’t quite hate the book. I simply think it could’ve been written a lot better, without shoving the supposed superiority of England in our faces, without bland characters, without the unlikeable protagonist, without cardboard settings and definitely without machismo and layers upon layers of Thermidorian propaganda.

I wouldn’t recommend this story unless you really want to kill time and have nothing else to do.

With that in mind, allow me to conclude the fourth meeting of our Convention. Stay tuned for the announcement of the topic of the next meeting and have a good day, Citizens.

Love,

- Citizen Green Pixel

#in the reign of terror: the adventures of a westminster boy #french revolution #frev #history #maximilien robespierre #robespierre #jacobin fiction convention #jean paul marat #georges danton #french history #obscure frev media #frev media #novels #review

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yourneighborbakugou · 3 years

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To Love's End, Part 4

Read Part One / Part Two / Part Three Summary: When love isn’t enough to mold fate together. Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Fem!Reader Warning: angst, mentions of death Word Count: ~5.1k Playlist: The time we spent by Jordy Quirkless AU! Feudal Japan AU! A/N: Life has been really hectic so getting this chapter out took wayyyyyyy longer than I thought. This chapter was already drafted two months ago and I couldn't find the motivation to read through it for errors until now. We’re about half way through the story! Woot! Woot! Thank you, as always, for being patient with me. Thank you for reading my work and supporting me. I hope you enjoy it!

The fog is dense in the south countryside of Japan. The harsh breeze from sea flows through the small village at the edge of town. Deku stares out at sea as he recalls the last conversation he had with Dabi before his death.

After a long day of recruiting members to their rebellion against King Sasaki, Deku and Dabi visit the local Izakayas (pub/tavern) to relax. Over gyoza and sake, Deku praises Dabi on a successful recruitment day. It was satisfying to see people come to the realization that Saski was unworthy of being King. They toast and drink multiple rounds of sake before Dabi placed a hand on Deku’s shoulder.

“You have potential, kid. Don’t let fools deter you from your path.” Dabi says, taking a gulp from his cup of sake.

Deku angrily chugs his sake and nods knowing exactly what he meant. If there’s one thing he knows about Dabi, it’s seeking revenge on those who’ve hurt you the most.

Memories sprint in his head of his younger self running for his life through the forest. Screams and the fire raging behind him motivated him to keep moving forward.

“Don’t look back. Keep going until you're safe--promise me Izuku.” his mothers words echo in repeat.

Before Deku has the chance to reflect more, his trance is broken when he spots soldiers approaching in the distance--Tomura. Deku swiftly tucks the painful memory back into its safebox but he doesn't lock it. There was an important message Dabi shared that night that he needs to think on.

Tomura has never been good news to Deku. Ever since he joined the rebellion Tomura always had something against him. Deku didn’t come from a rich family and was instead chosen by hand by Dabi. Deku wondered if that was the reason.

“Deku. Such a distasteful name.” Tomura says with self-satisfaction of his mocking. “Funny seeing you out here. Shouldn’t you be on your way to kill Bakugou?”

Deku bites his tongue knowing all too well that bickering with Tomura wasn’t a good choice.

“Don’t worry. I’m just here to do my job--kill you if you don’t kill Bakugou.” Tomura grins evilly.

Tomura tosses Deku a wrapped cloth before turning to leave.

“That should be enough for one try. I’ll be watching.”

Deku grips the wrapped cloth in his hand tighter. He’d expect his job to be tough but getting only one shot to kill Bakugou? Could he do it?

Deku fights the thoughts in his head as he watches Tomura go out of sight. Deku has always watched Bakugou from afar since they were not on the same path. He wished he could’ve done more for Bakugou to show King Sasaki’s true colors before things had gotten so ugly.

Throwing his cloak over his shoulders, he walks to his horse, One.

“Ready, One.” Deku leans his forehead on One. One neighs in response and as the sun rises in the distance, Deku is off towards the north.

Passing through the towns, Deku only makes necessary stops to sleep or eat. Yueei was at least a day’s ride. Late afternoon, Deku finds himself walking One through a village, passing through the market. Night was falling soon and stalls were beginning to close. Passing a stall that sold fruits, Deku stops in front of the woven basket that had fresh apples--50 yen, the sign says.

“Would you like one, son?” An old woman speaks to him from behind the stall. “I’m closing shop and it’d be a shame for those to go to waste.”

Deku smiles and takes an apple in hand. Before the old women could protest, he left 1,000 yen behind.

“Young man, your change!” The old woman yells from her stall. Deku continued forward with One, taking a bite into his apple. Apple has always been his favorite as a kid. Memories of him and Bakugou as kids walking between trees to pick apples with their mothers causes Deku to frown.

Bakugou.

In the late night, a shadow cautiously roams Yueei palace, making their way through the empty clearings and corridors, escaping the eyes of the palace guards. The figure slowly approached a room and crouched by the sliding door. They slid a white paper through the crack and waited. After a few seconds, a gold paper slides through and the figure quickly hides in their kimono.

“Don’t fail me.” a lady spoke in a low voice.

The shadow nods before vanishing into the night.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

“My lady!” You call from outside Ibara’s chambers. When she doesn’t respond a second time, you make your way inside only to find Ibara hunched over her kotatsu. She’s mumbling about something you can’t hear and when she lifts her head to look at you, the bag under her eyes tells you she’s been crying. Her eyes were puffy and nose was all red. Carefully navigating the conversation, you asked Ibara what happened and she explained.

She and Kirishima were supposed to meet for breakfast at their favorite spot in the palace but he never showed up. It wasn’t like him to not tell her if he couldn’t make it. Ibara waited over 2 hours and the food she cooked herself with Urakaka’s help went cold. What makes it worse is that it rained that morning and Ibara still waited. She continues to tell you Kirishima hasn't gone to see her or send her flowers/messages like he used to. Ibara was devastated. You nod in response to let her know you understood her.

“Y/N, can I ask you something?” Ibara looks at you with sadden eyes. “And please don’t lie to me.”

You take her hands in yours, hoping it will bring some resolve to her pain. Ibara lowers her gaze and nods, readying herself to ask you the question that was burning in her head since last night.

“Where were you the other day?”

You look at Ibara confused, unsure of what she meant.

“Y/N, please tell me where you were.” Ibara pulls your hands towards her lap and shuts her eyes. “Were you with Kirishima?”

“What?! Ibara, no!” You replied without hesitation and quickly shut down any ideas that would associate you with Kirishima. You’ve known since the beginning how much pressure Ibara put on herself to make things work with Kirishima. The truth was that Ibara’s time at the palace was going to be over soon. Her father had requested she go back home to help take care of their family estate. She only had a few months left and time with Kirishima was precious since he wasn’t going to be able to follow her. Knowing all this, the absolute last thing you want to do is jeopardize that for Ibara.

Thinking back to the day in question, you recall that was the morning you were at the wash house when you bumped into Bakugou---Ahhh, of course. You saw Bakugou that morning. That morning, you also knew Camie was looking for him and almost caught you both. She must’ve found out and lied to Ibara about who you were with. Not looking good, Y/N.

“Camie told me she saw you with him. She said you kissed him.” Ibara spoke again but this time in a low tone you barely heard it. Ibara turned away from you, hurt that you may have actually done what Camie told her. “She also said she saw you with him in his room.”

“Ibara, I would never do that to you. Please, believe me.” You reach for Ibara’s hands, desperate to make things right.

“So Camie is a liar? Is that what you’re saying?” Ibara swats your hands away before getting up towards the door. “I know Camie wouldn’t lie to me. How could you do this to me Y/N? You know how much I like Eijirou.”

Tears were now streaming down Ibara’s cheeks.

“I want you to leave. You can tell the housekeeper I don’t need you for a few days.” Ibara opens the sliding door and keeps her gaze low. “Please leave me alone.”

You know Ibara well, she’s made up her mind and nothing you say right now was going to work. Instead, you stand, take a bow and leave the room. Ibara closes the door behind you, leaving you standing there alone in the hallway listening to the soft cries from within her room. You pinch the space between your eyes to relieve the tension that was forming there.

The sound of swords clashing and grunts echo throughout the palace training grounds. Soldiers in the dozens are gathered around, training with one another.

“Man, I’ve missed the musty smell of men! The epitome of manliness. Wouldn’t you say so Bakugou?” Kirishima crosses his arms as he and Bakugou enter the training grounds to observe all the men before them.

SWOOSH

An arrow flies a few centimeters away from Bakugou’s face and he quickly catches it. A non-threatening shot; Bakugou grinned at the audacity of his men. This caught the attention of the men in the training grounds. Gasps of Bakugou’s sharpness turned the roaring training ground into a sudden stillness.

“It’s good to see you haven’t lost your touch.” One of Bakugou’s men, Sero, approached.

“Of course, extra, you think I’d be beat easily with this damn arrow?” Bakugou says with a shit eating grin.

“It’s good to see you two. We’ve missed you out here.” says another one of his men, Kaminari, who was speaking in a teasing tone.

Bakugou tries to avoid these talks as much as possible but given the circumstances, he lets it slide. His men did save him and Kirishima. After merely saving Kirishima from the grasps of the enemies, Bakugou fainted himself. If it wasn’t for his soldiers bravery, they probably would’ve never made it home.

Bakugou was pumped to get training and waved his men to leave them alone. It’s been a long time since he’s been able to come out here. Kirishima waves the rest of the men goodbye, following Bakugou to an empty spot in the training grounds. The doctor recommended light work only. Their injuries may not be bleeding anymore but the skin still needs time to heal. The training of choice then? Sparring.

Both men remove their tops and wrap clothes around their hands and one on their head to move their hair out of the way. Kirishima grinned at Bakugou to cue that he was ready. Both men begin to throw jabs and punches at one another, trying to get a hit in. Bakugou would throw a punch, Kirishima would block. Kirishima would punch and Bakugou would counter. This went back and forth for about an hour before both men fell on the ground trying to catch their breaths.

Ever since they were kids, they’ve trained together to improve their combat skills. Their spar sessions have always been them giving each other 100%. Bakugou didn’t approve of half-ass training and Kirishima appreciated the toughness. It helped him improve his skills when he has an opponent who isn’t going easy on him for the hell of it. Bakugou may be better than him but Kirishima was not far behind.

“Man, who knew not training for a few weeks would make us so rusty.” Kirishima says in between each breath.

“Tch, who are you calling rusty.” Bakugou says nudging Kirishima in the arm.

“Ah--Careful Katsuki. Wound.” Kirishima chuckles at the fact that he felt pain from a tiny nudge. He hears Bakugou not quiet say ‘sorry’ but knew that was what his intention was when he said ‘whatever’.

“Kirishima?”

Kirishima quickly sits up at the sound of a voice he’s oh to familiar with. Camie enters the training ground, side eyeing the oogley eyes the soldiers were giving her. When Camie sees Kirishima was with Bakugou, her eyes lit up. Stalking over to the men, she smiled at Bakugou, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

“Bakugou. I’m so happy to see you’re well enough for training again. I’ve missed seeing you out here on my walk to the study room.” Camie speaks in the sweetest tone.

Kirishima clears his throat loudly to help Bakugou get out of the situation. “Camie, it’s good to see you too. Were you looking for me?”

“I heard Ibara wasn’t well this morning and wanted to tell you. Though, seeing Bakugou with you makes me extra happy.” Camie says as her eyes flirt with Bakugou despite no return of emotions from him.

“Why don’t you both join Ibara and I for lunch after training? It’s been awhile since we’ve all had lunch together. Let’s all get along.”

Kirishima looked at Bakugou and knew he didn’t like the sound of it. But he knew refusing Camie in front of the soldiers would also embarrass her and that’s very unmanly in his books. Kirishima would never allow anyone to be embarrassed around him.

“Sure, we can do that.”

Bakugou quickly nudged Kirishima and gave him a death stare.

Half the day has gone by and Ibara was still upset at you since the morning. You’ve tried bringing her food, tried to clean her room, walk her to her studies but got rejected each time.

Camie has really done it this time in punishing you. Ibara told you she wouldn’t need you which meant one thing--yard work. Plucking the weeds from the flower garden, you dump it into a waste bucket.

“Great job, Y/N. You’ve gone and pissed Camie off.” You say angirlying pulling a weed. “You could be doing easy work in the kitchen with Urakaka and drinking leftover sake.”

Task after task, you do as told--pulling weeds from the garden, cleaning the ponds from debris, disposing yesterday’s scraps for soil for the garden. By the time late afternoon comes, you find your limbs are aching, your back is in pain, and the pad of your feet just wants to rest.

“L/N! Bring water from the well to the wash house.” the housekeeper yells from across the yard. You respond with a ‘Yes, Ma’am” and move quickly to go fetch the water. With two buckets of water in your hands, you move slowly to the wash house. Walking past the great hall you can hear chatter and laughter. You stop by the door for a quick break for your arms, peeking inside. Looks like the court ladies and lords are having lunch. Blonde hair quickly catches your eyes and a smile tugs at the sight of him.

Bakugou sat across from Kirishima and Ibara while Camie sat next to him. Ibara and Camie were laughing and Kirishima looked happy. Thank gods those two have made up, you thought before your smile disappeared. You caught Bakugou’s subtle smile which made your heart ache. He fit so well with people of noble status. With the reminder that your status is the reason you can’t be with Bakugou, you pick up the buckets and slowly walk away.

By late afternoon you’re exhausted. You hate that you’ll be repeating this again tomorrow. Grabbing a roll of sushi from the kitchen, you head for a quieter space--the unused keep has always been reliable for situations like this.

You exhale sharply as you lean your head against the tree. Your first bite of food for the day was satisfying. You quickly eat your food and gulp down water before basking under the shade. Closing your eyes, you listen to the crickets chirping in the distance, allowing yourself to relax. And before you know it you feel asleep.

In the midst of the chatter at his table, Bakugou caught a glimpse of you as you stopped by the door struggling with the pail of water. He chuckled at the sight before thinking of an excuse to leave to help you. When he looked at the door again, you were already gone.

“Ibara, it’s good to see you and Kirishima together.” Camie taunts, knowing full well about the lie she told yesterday. “You two are really the perfect pair.”

“You’re too kind, Camie. We don’t look as great as you and Bakugou.” Ibara giggles as the sake they’ve been drinking starts to settle in her body.

“Ibara, you don’t look so well. Should I call L/N to help take you to your room?” Kirishima holds Ibara by the waist as she becomes unbalanced in her seat.

“No!” Ibara protested eagerly. The last person she wants to see right now is the person trying to steal her man. “Won’t you take me, Eijirou?”

Kirishima turns red hearing Ibara call him by his first name in public. It’s not long before Kirishima is helping Ibara out of her seat. Bakugou and Camie waved them goodbye as they walked off down the corridor.

“Kat--”

“Don’t call me that.” Bakugou shuts down Camie’s attempt. He remembers the look in your eyes whenever Camie is mentioned and how you think she belongs to him or whatever. He needs to cut the weed before it causes more problems.

“But you call me by mine. Why can’t I do the same?”

“Its different. You’re a court lady. Look Camie, I don’t want to beat around the bush. Thank you for everything you’ve done for me. But I’m sorry I can’t return your feelings.”

“Stop! I don’t want to hear it!” Camie breathes heavily, taking a step back from Bakugou. The sake was starting to set for her now too.

“The Utsushimi family deserves someone more worthy than me. There are lots of suitable lords here at Yueei.”

“But I want you!” Camie peers through her lashes with prickling eyes.

“Even if you push me away, I’ll keep trying!” Camie wipes away her tears before turning to walk away from Bakugou.

Bakugou pinches the space between his eyes as the frustration from dealing with women sets a growing headache for him. It’s not that Bakugou hates Camie. But rather he knows what the lifestyle of being with Camie meant and he was not up for that. Bakugou didn’t fancy the court life at Yueei. He didn’t want royalty or money. He wanted to do a damn good job at his duties before retiring to have a quiet peaceful life.

He needs to take a walk.

Bakugou mindlessly strolled through the palace, nodding to a few soldiers he passed, and enjoying the calmness of the late afternoon. His feet took him to the far end of the palace before he knew it. The unused keep he found you after the intruder incident suddenly becomes noticeable. He quietly walks to the keep entrance for the first time since then. Opening one side of the door, the sight of you sleeping against the tree caught him by surprise. He sees the two buckets you were struggling to hold earlier not far either. A big smile finds its place on his lips as he walks to you.

“Oi.” Bakugou bends down and pokes your shoulders. No response.

“Overworked yourself again hm?” Bakugou shakes his head. He takes a seat next to you, careful to not disturb you. Seconds later, your head starts to slip forward. Bakugou quickly stops your head with his palm and angles you to rest on his shoulder. In your sleep, you hummed and wiggle in approval.

Fuck, that was so cute. Bakugou covers his mouth to hide the red tint on his cheeks. He stayed as still as possible to support you.

“Baka.” You spoke in your sleep, drawing Bakugou’s attention. Bakugou raised an eyebrow, wondering who you were calling an idiot. “‘Suki, stay.”

Bakugou tense at his first name rolling off your lips for the first time.

THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP

His heart pumps loudly with no ending. Tingly feelings bubble inside him, makes him want to smile all the damn time with you, heart always aching to see your beautiful face--this feeling inside him, it’s been the same since the first time he laid eyes on you. Bakugou doesn’t understand how and why you make him feel this way. All he knows is that he loves it.

Deep in his thoughts of you, Bakugou also dozed off.

The afternoon was soon fading into night. The keep remains calm with a slight breeze entering and existing. A leaf flows by and brushes your nose, tickling you awake. You straighten yourself as you yawn.Your arm suddenly brushes a shoulder drawing your attention to the man sleeping next to you. Bakugou begins to stir as well and before you know it you both are looking at one another.

“Bakugou. What are you doing here?” Flustered, you hide behind your sleeves.

Bakugou clears his throat and turns away from you. He doesn’t want you to see his rosey cheeks. “Was just checking on you.”

How thoughtful he was. Before you can appreciate his thoughtfulness, your brain betrays you be replaying the hurtful scene you saw earlier that day of Bakugou with Camie.

“Stop overworking yourself.” Bakugou flicks your forehead.

“Ow!” You pout covering your forehead. All the worries you had suddenly flew out the door.

“I don’t ask for my assignments okay. It’s just my luck today that Ibara is also upset at me so there’s nothing I can do.”

“Besides, I’m a maid so I do as I’m told.” You lower your head in defeat, fingers curled on your apron.

“Doesn’t give them the right to bully you.” Bakugou countered.

“I wish it was that easy.” You scoffed standing up.

“Who do I need to beat up?”

“I’d like to keep my job so no thank you.” You chuckled, turning to meet his towering figure.

“Well they have you sleeping out here in the open by yourself. What if something happens?” He inched closer to you.

“But nothing happened because you were here.” You smiled big to him.

You really knew when to be cute to him. Bakugou softened his eyes and smiled back.

“Look, in a few days all the lord's will be here.” Bakugou starts but you know where this was going.

“I won’t get in any trouble, promise.” You say bringing your pinky to him. Bakugou brings his pinky to yours to complete the promise.

“Hey love birds.” Kirishima calls from the keep’s entrance. You both turn to see Kirishima dressed in his best Kimono. “His Majesty calls.”

“Gotta go.” Bakugou spoke softly before letting go to meet Kirishima. You watch them before turning to quietly squealing about the fact that you and Bakugou took a nap together.

On your walk back to your quarters, you passed the kitchen and inside was Urakaka cleaning up for the day.

“Any sake tonight?” You peaked through the door and waved. With the way Kirishima was dressed, you figured Lords were gathering which means the big guns were being served tonight.

“If we get lucky.” Urkaka says as she winked at you. “Thankfully I don’t have to cook the meals tonight, only cleaning. So if there are any leftovers you bet we’re drinking them. For now, we only have tea.”

Urakaka pats the seat next to her at the table for you.

“I heard things aren’t well with Ibara today.” Urakaka says as she pours you a cup of tea. You wrinkle your brows trying to figure out how she knows.

“The maids have been talking.” Urakaka takes another sip as you nod in defeat and sip your tea. “Y/N, you know I don’t like butting into your business, but as your friend I feel obligated to say this.”

Urakaka explains that the maids are gossiping at the palace about seeing you and Bakugou together and rumour has it that you’re trying to get Camie jealous. Camie has also been vocal with the maids sprouting lies to them that you were a devious person and for people to be wary of befriending you. Camie even lied that Bakugou loves her and that you were stealing him from her. Maids you’ve known before Camie came to the palace, who you were on good terms with, also started to believe the lies.

“What bullshit!” You exclaim in anger. “I am not stealing Bakugou from her.”

Urakaka motions you to calm down and to lower your voice.

“Y/N, I know that but others don’t. The reason I’m telling you all this is because I worry for your well-being at the palace. Rumours like these never end well. Don’t you remember what happened last time with the maid that tried to go against the court ladies? She was found dead at the outskirts of town.”

Urakaka was right. The power court ladies have were truly terrifying. At any given moment you can be disposed of and replaced at Yueei. Thankfully King Sasaki has been kind to his people and ensures all maids who are to be fired or replaced are to be discussed with him first. King Sasaki was much tougher than King Yagi but nonetheless just as righteous. He always did right by his people.

“Just promise me you’ll be careful?” Urakaka takes your hand in hers. You nod in agreement and give her a gentle squeeze.

“Urakaka!” The housekeep calls from outside.

“Y/N! Good thing you're here!” The housekeeper enters the kitchen. “Make more tea and help serve it.”

Urakaka quickly helps you boil some tea and you’re soon on your way to help serve the guests. Making your way past the other maids who were walking back, you can’t help but notice the stares from each of them before the whispers began.

Making your last corner to the hall, a fellow maid purposefully bumps into you,causing you to drop the teapot and burning yourself in the process. You yelp in shock. The maid who bumped into you made no apology. Instead, she looked at you with disgust and turned to walk away.

Urakaka was right about the maids. With no time to waste dwelling in your sadness, you pick up your shattered teapot, wipe what you could with your apron before making your way back to the kitchen to get more tea.

Urakaka runs to check on you when she sees your kimono had tea stains and hands were red. You say reassure her you were fine and ask for a new batch of tea. Urakaka nods and turns to busy herself with a new tea batch.

Hold yourself together, you say to yourself, wiping a fallen tear. You throw the wet apron into a bin nearby before grabbing a new apron to put on. The new apron hides just enough of the tea stains on your kimono, making you still presentable. This time, Urakaka comes along to make sure you’re okay. Getting to the great hall, you pause with Urakaka beside you.

“Are you going to be okay?” She asks and you nod in response. You know Bakugou would be here and that would at least help calm you down.

“Why do we have to wear this?” Bakugou groans when Kirishima brings in a flashy orange kimono with a black dragon engraved in the back.

“We need to look our best tonight. Lord Sorahiko Torino is coming to visit to pay respect to the late King Yagi.” Kirishima helps Bakugou dress since they were already running late. Kirishima had got dressed as fast as he could first and thankfully found Bakugou in the nick of time.

“Hurry.” Kirishima pulls Bakugou into the corridors and towards the grand hall where a small gathering of lords and samurai had congregated. Entering the room, they both bowed as onlookers stared.

“It’s a great honor to meet you Samurai.” Lord Torino bows as Bakugou and Kirishima approaches.

“The honor is ours, my lord.” Bakugou returns the bow, Kirishima follows suit.

King Sasaki motions the group gathered to take a seat at the table as maids began to serve tea. King Sasaki and Lord Torino begin to talk business while the Samurai’s chat aside on their own. Kirishima begins serving the samurai’s sake as they talk.

Bakugou watches you enter with other maids and frowns at the sight of your condition. He didn’t remember seeing your Kimono stained nor your hand red. He remembers you telling him earlier you’ve been overworked by the housekeeper.

“Isn’t that right Bakugou?” Kirishima says as he nudged Bakugou to get his attention. One of Torino’s samurai asked about his victory at Wakayama and Kirishima was more than happy to explain in detail how the battle went down.

Bakugou nods, gulping down his sake, eyes still glued to you as you make your rounds to him. When you get to him, you smile and pour him a cup of tea. Orange suits him well. You thought to yourself when your eyes met him.Before your hand gets too far, Bakugou gently holds your wrist to stop you from leaving.

“What happened to your hand?”

You contemplate whether to tell him the truth. What would he do if he found out you were getting bullied by the other maids because of Camie's dislike of your relationship with him?

“I accidentally spilt tea. Nothing serious.” You lie, quickly pulling away before onlookers notice. You try to walk away but is again stopped when he holds you by your apron.

“Meet me outside in an hour.”

You nod at his requests and make your way to serve tea to the rest of the group. Existing the hall, you see Urakaka talking to the housekeeper.

“Ah, there she is.” Urakaka smiles seeing you returned. “Isn’t that right, Y/N? You said you’ll help me make gyoza tomorrow?”

You hesitate for a second not knowing where she was going with this but nod. Housekeeper agreed to have you help Urakaka tomorrow but insisted she can only let you for a day since the palace needed tending to.

“Thank you for saving me.” You agonized over the task with Urakaka who only chuckles at your pain.

“I’m happy I’m stuck with kitchen duties. You know, I used to be jealous that you were a court maid.” Urkaka loops her arms in yours as you both make your way back to the kitchen. “But then I hear about your yard duties and boy would I rather wash dishes than pluck weed.” She laughed as she teased you.

You playfully nudge her in annoyance but grateful to have a friend at the palace.

“Thank you, Ochako. You’re always saving me when I need it most.” You say, squeezing her arm tighter.

Night soon fell and you were done for the day. Waving Urakaka goodbye, you decide to head to the only spot you knew Bakugou would go to meet you. Though he didn't say it, you knew what he meant when he said ‘outside’.

Opening the keep doors, you make your way in and sit down by the tree to wait. Pulling your knees towards you, you hug them in anticipation.

A creak from the front doors draws your attention and a figure enters.

TO BE CONTINUED......

Taglist: @cayofdreams @bakugous-mamas @yourlocalbabybird @levimeko

#bakugou x reader #Bakugou Katsuki #bnha bakugou #feudal japan AU #bakugou angst #bakugou fluff #bakugou series

67 notes · View notes

nightswithkookmin · 3 years

Note

still same anon. this was another one of my asks from months ago. basically it was a comment I made about jikook's intimacy. it was from this interview: https://youtu.be/T--BOS8oTec the moment I'm talking about happens from 3:00 minute timestamp onwards. i was saying how despite this moment being "skinship" or whatever, it kinda hit different? there's also intimacy there. bc you see how jimin doesn't have to say anything and jungkook immediately understands what to do and starts massaging his neck. jimin literally threw a glance at him, tilted his neck a lil and jungkook didn't need a second more to know what to do. I wanted to talk to you about it since I know that you're not big on skinship defining jikook's relationship, but I think there ARE jikook skinship moments worth noting and this is one of them imo.

Oh ok. Thanks.

SKINSHIP IN CONTEXT

I think skinship by it's very definition is an intimate act depending on the level of familiarity between the parties involved in the act.

From my understanding of skinship, it's basically interactions that would otherwise be viewed as sexual outside of their culture but viewed as acceptable platonic behavior between the same sex or even the opposite sex.

The objective of skinship is to be intimate with another person on a level that's only next to romance.

I remember my sister telling me how shook she was when she found out for the first time, around 2011 when she first moved to Seoul, how she couldn't even keep her pants on at a 'Jimjirban' because all the gals in there were expected to walk around butt naked in the spa. No towels, no pants, no robes butt nakedttt.

'Mehn, this doesn't happen where I'm coming from' she said to her companion.

A. I'm black.

B. I'm not flat.

C. I'm wearing my pants.

Her very naked friend, a native SK, whom she says she'd only met for like a week, then grabbed her underwear and pulled it down her thighs exposing her deforested vagina to the winds and a dozen other curious gazes. All females.

'For a second, I thought I had been tricked into an orgy of a sort. I was very naked without my consent. Wind whistling through my shy butt cracks. Watching very naked females of varying ages stare on with pride and smiles on their faces as if I had just saved a village or something and when I jiggled when I walked I could hear them gasp, amazed- Goldy, how is this not gay?'

'You think skinship between their men is weird, wait till you see their women. Wait till a very attractive Korean girl is breathing down your neck and caressing your nape and complementing your skin while showing you pictures of her boyfriend on her phone.'

She says it took her a while to get used to the skinship between women in SK and seeing the men interact in a certain way messed with her brains for a while. She said she felt her intelligence was being played with most of the time.

I guess if you want to look at Jikook's skinship as intimate then there's nothing wrong it.

Skinship is intimate at the very least.

But skinship, for all intent and purposes, is platonic and nonsexual in nature. And maybe this is a fatal flaw on my part. Or maybe thanks to my sister, I'm desensitized to this form of interaction but I have a hard time seeing Jikook's intimacy as platonic or even seeing most of their skinship as romantic- in anyway. It will make sense in a bit, hold on.

I have a hard time equating skinship with romantic intimacy. But that's just me.

I wasn't able to click on the link you sent but I'm guessing this is the moment you are talking about?

I wouldn't call this skinship. I mean it is but I wouldn't call it that. Skinship is meant to show how close two people are. How familiar they are with eachother.

This doesn't show how close Jikook are. But It shows how caring and affectionate JK is as human being, as a dongsaeng, and as a boyfriend.

I'd rather we celebrate that. JK doesn't get highlighted enough. He caters to the people he cares about. He is an attentive person.

Hate to be a grinch but I can pull up a couple of times JK has done that very gesture with Jin or Tae or Hobi. Remember Soop? Remember when Jin complained of feeling cold and JK went up to him immediately and 'warmed' him up?

Of course, Jimin kept stealing glances at him like he could throw a shoe at the back of his head if he could but that's beside the point.

The man is an empath. He's said several times he feels a lot of pain watching his hyungs go through it. Fact is, Jk cares about people. He's kind, loving and he shows this aspect of him through gestures like these.

He does it for Jimin. He does it for all the members because as he's said, they are all a family.

It's stressful hearing people claim he doesn't give a fuck about Jimin, that he doesn't care about JM because he shows affections for others besides JM.

At some point we would have to make a distinction between what acts flows from their unique personalities because of who they are at their core and what act flows from them being a couple.

Most people who see Jimin as a natural nurturer and what not are able to separate this identity from his ship moments but JK isn't accorded the same privilege. It is why most people are quick to lash out at him when he interacts with others in the same way he interacts with Jimin.

When JM acts nurturing towards V or RM or Suga he is seen a good, kind person.

When JK does something affectionate it's seen as a beautiful Jikook moment or Taekook moment or Jinkook moment and is soon swept under the carpet, soon forgotten and never tied to the personality of JK- perhaps because most of these shippers don't care to know who JK is as a person and as a human.

When Jimin does something affectionate its 'awww Jimin is such an amazing person' even if that act is merely performative sometimes.

I try not to engage in conversations that perpetuate this horrifying discrimination against either of Jikook. They are both individuals.

There are a lot of Asks sitting in my box highlighting the various ways JM is awesome and kind and amazing as s boyfriend to JK and not a single out of 500 plus posts talking about how empathetic JK really is. How thoughtful he is to even pack motion sickness drugs to go on trips even though he doesn't get motion illness and JM is the one that often complains about motion sickness on trips.

The heteronormative lens, on opposite ends of the spectrum in the shipping community, which dictates we perceive on Jikook as either feminine or masculine is a telltale sign of the misogyny and misandry prevalent within this fandom.

The fandom's heteronormative lens filters Jimin as the wildly feminine archetype, wildly fragile, sexy and womanly right down to the way we praise him as the 'good woman' in his relationship with JK- loyal, faithful, nurturing, kind, silent in that he continues to perform Jikook even when Jikook are not in a great place. etc.

Yet because he is seen as womanly or feminine, the part of the fandom that hates women hate Jimin. That's where all the slut shaming, bullying and harassment stems from- misogyny.

Jk is viewed as the opposite of that. By most, he is very masculine man and as such harbors all the traits of masculinity the modern woman detests- toxic masculinity, cheating, disloyal, fuckboy who treats women like shit. All forms of hatred and intolerance towards men is projected on to him especially by male intolerant people or dare I say feminist women within the fandom.

And you see them in the way they are always fighting for Jimin against JK as if Jimin were a fragile faithful woman whose man don't treat him right thus further perpetuating the heteronormative stereotypes of Jimin.

What's disconcerting is Jikook are both men and yet depending on how their masculinity or femininity is perceived, they are both treated very differently.

You hear Tuktukkers talk about how Jikook is as a result of heteronormativity and thus prescribe Taekook as the ideal homonormative ship- because to them, Tae and JK are both seen as two whole men.

To them Jimin is just not man enough to even be gay- isn't that the foundation of homophobia?

Gay men not seen as men at all?

Whereas amongst Jokers, Jimin's manliness is often forgiven and JK's is abhorred. Jk is too much of a man and men just ain't shit.

This may sound like an over simplification but Tuktukkers hate women, Jokers hate men and either side suck. In my opinion.

Jimin is a nurturer he cares about people including his boyfriend. JK is an empath he feels the pain of those close to him including his boyfriend and is often moved to ease or take away some of that pain.

It's thus annoying to hear people out here yell and complain on every turn each time JK interacts with the others how JK 'doesn't act exclusive' with Jimin or how he doesn't care about Jimin.

Should he not care about anyone besides Jimin just because he is dating Jimin?

It's annoying when they say the same about Jimin. Jimin nurtures everyone ergo there's nothing special or exclusive about the way he nurtures JK.

Nonsense such as these are spewed without taking into account that those acts in themselves speak directly to who these people are as human beings first and foremost; secondly, to how they feel about the person at the recieving end of their affections.

If they are treating everyone the same it's probably because they love everyone too- in a non romantic way of course. It's their love language. They love others with the same heart they love eachother with.

It doesn't take away from how they feel about eachother. JK admiring another member does not mean when he admires Jimin it's nothing. It just mean he admires Jimin too.

Not everything has to be romanticized or given a romantic context. They are each expressing themselves and their feelings for their bandmates. It's about them not their bandmates or their relationship with said bandmates.

Certain moments are just attestation to their love language be it platonic or romantic and it says more about who they are as people than what their relationship with the other person is. It's not all about their relationship.

People need to start treating Jikook as individuals. They are humans first before a ship. Shipping them shouldn't take away from their authentic expressions of self.

That's how they each end up getting cussed out in these streets left and right.

It's ridiculous.

This is JK being JK. Imma leave it at that.

This is from the same interview where Tae was talking about how they love showcasing their bond.

It's ok to celebrate it. Just see it for what it is- as flowing from JK's kind self. This is not Jikook. This is JK. Jeon Jungkook.

Don't fume or act disappointed when you see him do the same kind gesture for another member just because of the meaning you are imposing on this moment. Know what I mean?

That being said, there are certain Jikook 'skinship' moments that crosses the line of skinship right into sexual foreplay.

If 'skinship' leaves you 'sexually excited' it's not skinship. Nobody can tell me nothing.

Make of this moment what you will. Just be responsible with it. I think. But don't mind me. I'm grumpy.

Signed,

GOLDY

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reidecorating · 3 years

Text

the bau team and their star signs based on science

hotch: clearly an aries. this is not up for debate and i don't take criticism. natural born and excellent leader? maybe. but bossy boots because he is just a bossy boss man who probably sleeps in a suit or those pyjamas that have suit graphics on them? most definitely. when he speaks, his voice sounds like it’s coming out in all lower case, when he yells, it’s all caps. angery. down to throw hands at anything in his immediate line of vision probably. will exterminate you like a roach if you mess with someone he cares about. don't break the rules or my boss will kill me 😡 to you're breaking the rules under MY supervision, that way my boss will kill US 🥰. probably microwaves food a lot. type of dad to say no to getting a dog, then two months later get matching christmas costumes with said dog. never stops working because he is an absolute UNIT built like the circuit of one of those infinity pools in bali. could use another sabbatical.

rossi: i saw his birth certificate and the rumours are true, he’s a november sagittarius. two wives away from being a modern day king henry the eighth. it’s rossi’s world and we’re all just living in it. he is a prophet. his third eye has been opened and he ascended to the seventh dimension at the age of 24. when he takes leave, the only way to contact him is through a ouija board in latin or maybe greek depending on the position of the sun. he will only die when he chooses to die but will dissolve at the words ‘what are we?’. the major arteries in his body are just long pieces of macaroni. definitely has hooked up with one person from every state the jet has landed in. no filter between his brain and mouth, will destroy your self confidence intentionally. uses abbreviations when texting. liberal - because of the experimenting back in college. probably friends with your mum on facebook.

prentiss: imagine her being anything but an air sign. you can't because she's clearly an aquarius?? work comes first (first equal with her girlfriend). if you tell her to do something she simply won't do it, especially if it was something she was just about to do. she once came home from a run with her mother in the summer and her mother politely suggested that she should drink some water. emily, an anarchist, did not drink water and was hospitalised for heatstroke in due course of proving her point of nonconformity. has been to jail. sucks on candy canes and makes them pointy because christmas is one of her least favourite days. on probation. no, i really like him *deletes his number*. maybe moves to iceland to become a sheep herder to avoid having to ever see anyone she has romantically affiliated with ever again. actually quite the jester, joke levels exceed 4000, but can make you laugh and cry in the span of approximately the length of a short youtube ad. the antichrist.

morgan: has at some point caused someone to question their sexuality. am i really a straight man? do i really only like women? - direct quotes from anyone who has seen him. if that doesn't scream libra i don't know what does. i’m trying to refrain from using the words ‘hot’, ‘sex god’, ‘rail me’. the kinda guy who will hold open a door for you, but also have no problem kicking one down for you. has never ditched class before. momma’s boy. tries to make his pecs move in the mirror. he KNOWS he’s hot okay??? but THEN its not just that because people are like ‘oh he's attractive’ but then they find out he’s RESPECTFUL, and INTELLIGENT and COMPASSIONATE and then that awkward moment when you just DIE because he is not flawed??? it’s like he’s a lucid dream??? probably secretly is really good at baking some obscure european good. uses colognes that have really manly man sounding names for instance, ‘Man Musk’, ‘Mystical Muscles’, ‘Beards and Buttercream’.

garcia: the epitome of a female pisces. a baddie™. definitely owns a pair of those really skinny sunglasses that influencers wear and looks like god herself while in them. spirals from being the momma bear to the wine-aunt. she will care about you so hard but if that's not reciprocated, will hack into your my eyes only and fax those pictures to every machine she can connect to. accidentally has flirted her way into at least 19 relationships. really good at writing fan fiction??? like - seriously good. knows 4 different synonyms for the word “member” iykyk. researches things the people she loves most enjoy, so when she talks to them she can have more detailed conversations. catches feelings for people who are definitely not good for her. sometimes just takes off her glasses because she's tired of, well... seeing. hand makes cute lil earrings for her friends. a master at fireboy and watergirl and will never play with anyone else because ‘another player just slows you down, i can do it myself in half the time’. THAT FRIEND WHO WILL WAIT FOR YOU TO TIE YOUR LACES.

jj: virgo. she was definitely that girl who had notes with pretty titles and colour coded highlighters in school. also did extracurriculars in the weekends so she’d have to be picked up from sleepovers early to go to soccer games. when she takes the time to learn something she learns it well and perfects any craft handed to her because anything less than 100% is failure in her eyes. gets annoyed when other people cry for too long probably. will judge you. so much. silently. especially if you cry. don't make her mad because she has caused civil unrest in 13 continents. live, laugh, love signs in her kitchen. security footage surfaced in 2007 of her roundhouse kicking a middle aged man, in the junk food aisle of a trader joe’s, after he took the last re-stocked bag of cheetos. has a ‘mom first, agent second’ mug that garcia got her. likes family walks which will most likely be planned out meticulously, involving a detailed itinerary of the day i.e. Henry’s toilet break, 10AM

reid: he despises star signs and anyone who gives them any thought because “where is the SCIENCE?” this bitch is a scorpio. definitely only knows his sun sign. so intense! have you seen the way he looks at things?? the way he stares??? the way he analyses dead bodies??? the way he loves??? ridiculously put together to everyone around him but emotionally life is soup and he is fork. kinky. breaks off bananas little by little with his hands before eating each piece individually because eating them normally is too sensual and he’s paranoid morgan might see him doing it and take a picture. wants the kind of love he reads about. has a superiority complex about having a superiority complex. keeps a straight face while saying literally anything so you cannot tell if he’s being serious or not like one day he’ll just be like “yeah i killed a man with an axe once to enable myself to more easily empathise with future unsubs who potentially work as lumberjacks or have a history of logging. it’s called method axing,” and then leave the room to draw circles on maps or something. believes that parallel parking should work, in theory, but never seems to work for him in practice.

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nanasarea · 4 years

Text

Park Jisung as your idol bf

Genre: fluff

Pairing: jisung x idol!reader

Requested

Word count:1757 (dear lord, the longest in the idol bf series damn...)

a/n: this is more of a jisung as your bf in general, not so much the idol aspect sorry. Also yes, i ended up writing about jisung having a baby, sue me, I’m in jisung hours now! also do i even need to say it’s not proofread at this point?

Haechan / Yuta / Mark / Jeno / Jaemin / Chenle / Renjun / Jaehyun

you were in the same dance class when you were younger

so you were friends way before either of your debuts

like when you knew each other when he was an smrookie

and of course, both of you being talented dancers

you were both training under companies at a rather young age

and it isn’t easy being a trainee regardless of your age

but because you were both still in school

and so young

you knew you should stick together

let’s say you had chemistry homework

but you also had vocal lessons

i’m not saying he would help you

because he wouldn’t

but he would be there to motivate you

and study his own school work

so you weren’t alone

it’s safe to say you were each other’s motivation when it came to school

he would also insist on his mom picking you up from school and driving you to the company when your mom couldn’t

same would go reversed

not that either of your moms minded

they found it adorable

and they shipped you both anyway so

that means him and his family coming over for dinner

and you and yours going to theirs for dinner

and your moms would document all of your childhood memories

they would bond over it

since you didn’t have time to make any friends in school,

you both valued your friendship a lot

he ended up debuting before you

and you teased him a lot

until he “taught” you how to ride a hoverboard

and you ended up falling in the first 4 seconds

then he would tease you

and you’d now understand how hard his dances really were

you met most of his members when they were smrookies

but you didn’t know renjun and chenle that well

so whenever you could,

you would hang out with each other

and become very close

which is why they were all so supportive when you ran into their dorms and yelled that you were debuting

you end up having a little celebration

when you actually did debut,

they were so hyped

especially jisung

he streamed your mv so many times

he knew every detail of every scene in the mv

which was adorable

the fans knew you were childhood friends so they absolutely loved your interactions

which meant your company/companies being like

WE COULD MAKE MONEY FROM THAT

so they make sure you have a collab stage

like really early in your debut

and it was kinda awkward

but because you knew each other beforehand

you felt completely fine

at this point, your moms were betting on when you’d start dating

to which you would both just blush and tell them to stop

you end up going on so many variety shows together

mainly dance specials

and everyone finds you too adorable

like everyone ships it

but they’re kinda lowkey about it because they don’t want to make you uncomfortable

not the case of his members tho

or yours

you can’t tell me jaemin’s hiatus wasn’t just him laying in bed, resting and planning your wedding

you can’t

taeyong ends up asking him why he hasn’t asked you out yet

he just blushes

it wasn’t until you were both a bit older

and you were at an award ceremony

where everyone was complimenting you

like your dress, makeup, hair, etc

that he realized he liked you

seeing you like that and realizing he needs to stop looking at you as his little childhood friend

and start looking at you as an adult

or somewhat of an adult

he can never look at you as an adult

because he would always have the image of you

with 6 empty chocolate milks around you

and a gummy worm hanging from your mouth

as you tried your best to color the coloring book correctly

but hey, you were always going to have the imagine of him

hanging from monkey bars

after he finished his 5th scoop of ice cream

and laughing because he overheard someone say a fart joke

ANYWAY

he starts seeing you as an adult

kinda

and he gets slightly jealous when everyone compliments you

so after that, he goes to taeyong and jaehyun

and asks for dating advice

jaehyun just yells

“wooooo! you should know my usual boba order by now, right, lee?”

These fuckers bet on how long it would take for jisung to realize his feelings

and jaehyun would regrets only asking for a free boba when he won

but he’s way too happy about winning to care

it ends with half of 127 and half of dreamies giving advice,

the other halves teasing

and wayv cooing on the phone as they were in china at the time

it takes him like 5 months till he confesses

he’s a nervous baby let him be

and when he does get the courage,

he takes you to an amusement park

you don’t go on any of the rides

because he’s scared

but you do play the games and eat food

you even watch the fireworks

which is when he finally holds your hand for the first time

you did a lot of skinship before

like when you were friends

but it wasn’t like this

it was cute

he was so nervous

your palms were both sweaty from nervousness

but neither of you cared

you were just happy to enjoy the moment

that got cheesy

he even walked you to your dorm

like to right in front of your door

which is when he hesitantly gave you a kiss on the cheek

but you wanted a real kiss so you gave him a proper kiss

and he ended up almost tripping on his way to the elevator

where he smiled to himself

and tried to calm himself down

so the members wouldn’t see him like this

but they did

they teased him

and just yelled with him

“our baby had his first kiss!” -jaemin

“life is going way too fast! weren’t you like 3 years old yesterday?!”- jeno

“how come he’s 2 years younger and already getting more action than me?!” -renjun

the others find out

and tease him

mostly they just congratulate him tho

“wooo! our baby is becoming a man!” -taeyong

“doyoung, hold me, i’m emotional!” -johnny

“when’s the wedding?” -taeil

“wedding? i always cry at weddings...” -jungwoo

“no weddings! yet!” -kun

“yeah! he’s not getting married before me!” -jaehyun

they might have gone a bit overboard

but can you blame them

it’s their baby we’re talking abt

they still see him as the little toddler from when he was on mickey mouse club

also you end up not telling your parents right away

and they keep match making

so you end up being like

“Mom, we’re already dating, you can stop”

cue both of your moms get excited

like they’re already talking about being the best grandmas

and having the cutest grandchildren

even tho you’ve only been together for 2 months

something tells me he’d be the type to want to have matching everything

phone cases

(probably anna and kristoff ones)

then profile pictures

jewelry

clothing

anything and everything

he’d find it so cute

speaking of matching profile pics

the fans would realize what was going on

when you would match your pfps

so your company/companies were like

yes, they’re dating, no one is surprised...anyway 127 comeback

your dating announcement is like super chill

mainly because everyone was waiting for it

also i feel like he’d always be playing with your hair

and fixing it

like all the time

a single hair out of place?

we can’t have that!

his hands are in your hair already

would text you for advice while filming chenji’s this and that

and would always make something for you too

“chenle’s turned out more aesthetic but mine is made with love, so mine is better my default.”

also it wouldn’t matter if you’re older than him, the same age, younger than him

doesn’t matter

would want to hear you call him oppa

but immediately get shy after

also he’s an aquarius

so if you end up getting really random texts during the day

like during your schedules

don’t be surprised

like he’s already maknae on top

so he will rebel to like some of the things you say

“jisung! we need to get back to filming in 3 minutes!”

“but weeee!” -jisung going down the slide for the 5th time

cries when you joke about leaving him there

speaking of crying,

we all know he’s emotional

and cries easily

so he just runs to you whenever he wants to cry

and just placed his head on your shoulder

to hide his facial expression

but it’s okay

you’ve already seen everything from the random snaps you get every day

he might not know how to comfort you at first

but he will learn

and he’s pretty mature for his age

so he would take comforting you very seriously

he’s a really good listener

so he would love to just hear you vent to him

it would kinda boost his ego a bit too

like he’s the one who you’re venting to

yknow what i mean?

but also he protects you very well

you get scared of a spider

he goes all manly mode

and gets rid of it for you

doesn’t like to admit it,

but he thinks about you a lot

and your future

like once you two grow out of your idol lives

and into a more adult life

where you get married

and have kids

kids who tease their uncles (aka nct members)

because THE maknae on top was their teacher after all

speaking of weddings

his older brother got married

and obviously you were his date

and everyone kept looking at you two

asking when it was your turn

your mom said “hopefully soon”

“mom, we don’t have time, we have busy schedules”

“but one day...”

time jump to when the news breaks about your engagement

and everyone is crying

they watched you both grow up and now you’re getting married??

what???

the announcement was everywhere

also you don’t announce anything about a child

one day, you just both post a picture of your daughter

with a caption like

“she’s so cute, i knew my genes were good.”

or something like that

and everyone goes wild

nation’s babies having a baby?

legend says chenle’s screaming caused 2 earthquakes that day

to sum it up: nation’s babies turned nation’s it couple because jisung is the best boyfriend you could ever have asked for

.....i might have gone way more invested than i thought i was going to. Do i regret it tho? hell no. Am i emotional now because I pictured adult Jisung with a baby? hell yes.

tag list: @soleilchannie

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dabis-devil · 4 years

Note

Could you pretty please do Shinso, Dabi, Overhaul, Kirishima, Shiggy, Bakugo and Tamaki with an S/O with is a ballet dancer and looks fragile but can actually kick ass? Sorry for the long ask but I just really adore you’re stuff!!!!!

Pretty Poison

Aw, thank you anon! Okay, I'd just like to apologize for holding off on my asks. I've seen busy and not feeling well lately, but I'm getting to my requests now! Love you all 🖤

Shinsou Hitoshi

Shinsou is an observational guy

He figured you weren't as innocent as you looked before you proved him right

All of which he figured out with distance.

When set to spar together, he was avoiding all of your agile moves, each one of your attacks

You were pressed to do give it your 100%

With a swing, you attempted to go for his neck with your fist, the purple haired man catching your fist.

He tried to get a blow at your torso, you swatted his fist.

when you tried a strike with the other, he caught that one too.

His leg scooped in the back of your knees, the two of you toppling to the ground.

Toshi is a good boi, he made sure you wouldn't get hurt before he went through with such a calculated move

“ oh kitten- ” he chuckled, tired eyes lock in onto your own. “ nobody expects this of you. . Only fools will underestimate you. ” his tone was eerie

You used your propped up knee to push yourself over. Turning the tables, Toshi on bottom now. “ nice to know. ” you mumbled with a savage smile.

Next thing you know you were helping each other up and leaving the training grounds.

Its when you and Shinsou went on your first date that he learned you were a dancer.

He didn't seem too phased honestly, but he thought it was cool!

“ Can I go to your next recital? ” he asked, thumb brushing against your cheekbone.

You said yes

Before the start of the recital, your eyes wandered endlessly around the stadium.

' where is he? ' your lips curling into a frown.

Maybe he decided he didn't care?

Little did you know, he was in the front row. Just dressed in a suit. . Classy Shinsou is rare

When you leaped across the stage, his large purple orbs followed your angelic form like a puppy eyeing a treat.

He isn't one to pump you up with compliments, but when you finally realized he was staring with a strong force of admiration, that said all.

He would stand and applaud afterward, meeting you in the back room for a bland congratulations and soft hug.

He'll be at every single recital

Every. One.

Dabi

Your innocence was cute, don't get him wrong

But his goal was to corrupt you.

He would place wondering hands on your body, expecting you to become a shell of a human and color to drain from your face

Instead your expression turned playful as you prompted him

Sinful things probably followed

And that's how he learned you werent fragile

With that in mind, this man had nO control

You already know a relationship with him entails dirtiness to keep it sPiCy

And I kid you not, your gracefulness drives him over the edge

Your movement was so controlled it's just- *chefs kiss*

The part of the town the compound was in definitely wasn't a good part of town

So you got harrased :((

“ hey pretty lady, ” a drunk man cooed, his large and sweaty hands running down your arm. “ come with me to the back. . ” he smiled and roughly tugged at your arm.

You could have easily shown this man a piece of your mind. The ghastly shrieks that filled the air stopped you though.

Dabi melted his face off, then left with you like nothing happened.

This why people don't mess with you anymore

Again, this is what makes the two of you a good team. He has your back, you have his, but you can both take care of yourselves.

He didn't really care to know you danced

It's just a hobby, when should he care? Do what you want.

If you dragged him off to recitals or anything don't be surprised if you see him playing on his phone or otherwise not paying attention.

Gives 0 fucks.

If for any reason he is watching

Probably because he think you look sexy.

Maybe it's the outfit, maybe it the way your body flows, who knows?

If you come to him bothered that he doesn't like your dancing, he will either

reassure you that he thinks you look incredibly sexy when you dance, and try to pay a little more attention to your routines

No promises^

Brush off your feelings and move on

Really isn't his cup of tea but A for effort

Bonus: he's asked you to dance on/for him

You're a dancer, of course you know how to lap dance. Of CoUrSe.

Idiot

“ doll, why don't you come show me some of those moves? ” he asks cheekily, already leading you back to the bedroom.

You still did. And you did well. So that's a win on his part-

Overhaul

Kai could appreciate your dancing, there was some sort of elegance in it.

The way your body moved from one figure to another just had his eyes drawn to you like magnets.

The fact that he kidnapped you for entertainment was besides the point

Well initially

You were given the option to leave, but you didn't.

Same offer does NOT apply now that you made your choice

The reason you were taken is for your doe eyes and soulful smile

You put up a damn good fight

But in the end you were being jumped by a few gang members.

Not to mention your escape attempts?

So thought out, and you came this close to busting out of the secret door each time.

Kai’s eyes burned holes hrough your skull when you were restrained to your bed.

“ love, why would you try to leave me? You know bad things could happen. . ” his tone sent goosebumps down your back

He's just possessive

Other than that, you can pretty much do what you want

So long as you stay in base

He turned a room into a dance studio for you

That's just how he shows affection.

he wants to sit and watch you dance until your knees buckle.

You bet your ass he will too.

“ where are you going? ” his eye brows knitted. “ I'm not done watching. ” he growled lowly, as you returned to your craft with a pout.

But that's fine,,,,

Even though he's not a huge fan of touching you

He gives the best massages.

(I'm actually so so sorry for this one, I haven't written Kai and oh my gOd I need to fix this characterization)

Eijiro Kirishima

This beautiful rock man

He thinks you are so adorable.

Literally precious okay, even before romantic ties developed

But when you become a badass out of nowhere, he's kinda stunned

You turned to Mineta and told him off for objectifying you, finishing that confrontation with a kick right to his crotch.

The grape boy wheezed and began to cry, but you walked off unbothered.

Of course Kiri, who had been on his way to save you from his perverted classmate, was like- “ huh?? ”

You being anything but reserved was a new emotion.

He didn't mind of course, he was excited to learn more about you.

And when he learns you're a dancer?

Oh boy.

Eiji supports you. Without a question!

And that's on being manly.

He shows up with roses to every single recital you have, dressed in fine attire, and will be the loudest person in the crowd.

“ WOoOOo!! YOU DID AMAZING Y/N! I LOVE YOUU!! ” He shouted from the top of his lungs.

Actually the first time he said I love you

Lowkey has good moves himself

You'll see that when he's dancing around the dorms to some cheesy music denki or Mina played

If you need help with a move he will put sweat, blood, and tears into perfecting it with you.

He literally won't shut up about you

When he's with his friends?

“ she's so beautiful! You should see her dance too! ” he gushed

Family?

“ y/n is so amazing. . (More babbles about you) ”

A wall?

“ I love y/n so much- ”

Just love him back okay

Tomura Shigaraki

This crusty man has his head in the game and all, but he totally swept you to the side.

He wants things to be blunt and direct

So when you were over there looking like a pure angel he just thought you were

As apart of the liberation front, he expected you to be there for covert missions, and not throw yourself into battle

But when you were over here taking out three heroes simultaneously??

It dawned on him that you were so much more useful.

It had been a late night and Shigs couldn't sleep, so he planned to hang out with you.

Your light shone under the crack of your door, prompting him to ask for your company

He placed a soft knock on your door to which there was no reply.

Instead, the melody of soft classical tunes drifted to his ears. The door creaked open, allowing the blue haired man a peak of insight as to what you were doing.

He saw your figure parading around the room in small leaps, harmonious twirls, and gentle hand movements.

His crimson eyes widened at what he saw. Not only did he realize how beautiful you are, but you were so soothing to watch?

For a little while he will beat around the bush

“ y/n, what were you up to last night? ” he asked, sounding as innocent as a mere child. “ hmm? ” his hands weaved together under his chin, leg swing in under his barstool.

Like when you already know something but you ask somebody anyways just to see what they would say yknow

He would make this one of his favorite things to do, watch you dance.

Over time you caught him staring through your door, and you weren't exactly happy about it

“ tomura! ” you squeaked, catching a glimpse of his florescent red orbs.

You raced over to the door, pausing your music with a fast tap to the pad of your phone.

“ why were you watching me? ” you frowned at your boyfriend, your shoulders building tense.

“ y/n. . ” he mumbled, hand searching for his agitated neck. “ I just couldn't look away. ”

Katsuki Bakugo

Bakugo did not underestimate your abilities. Ever.

From his experiences, he knows not to judge a person's abilities until you get a taste of what they can do.

He tried so hard to manipulate you into using your quirk, or just not being the peaceful person you came off as.

He faaaaailed

When you got to knew him better, you didn't hesitate to mop the floor with him.

He's impressed by your effort, so points there

He definitely liked your soft persona, on the contrary to his.

He won't tell you that though.

The closer you two got, the more he would step in to defend you and stick by your side.

The one time you snapped on somebody, he was left shaking in his boots.

He hasn't seen you behave like that. . He liked it 😏

Now don't get me wrong-

Baku didn't care for your dancing.

He didn't give a single fuck, okay

But whenever he actually saw your graceful dances on stage???

Consider him your biggest fan

But you wouldn't ever find that out. At least he thoughts so.

“ I have another recital tonig- ” you were cut off by an irritated Baku.

“ if you want me to go, just ask, dumbass! Stop whining. ” he snapped, leaving you blinking and dumbstruck

go off lord explosion murder-

He's in the front row just sitting there like

W O W

You already know he'll praise you for your preformance, whether those compliment were backhanded or of pure intent.

And if anybody dare thinks about down talking your dancing? They will be ripped. ..He would tear them apart with him bare hands. no cap.

If you absolutely amaze him, you will get the one in a lifetime chance to watch him stand up and scream your name with a proud grin, something along the lines of-

“ LOOK AT Y/N! (pronoun)'S DOING FUCKING AMAZING, JUST FUCKING LOOK AT MY BABY- ” his hand directed towards you, and you couldn't help but burn a shade of deep rose.

Tamaki Amajiki

Before you two were in a relationship, you had him fooled.

Like Tamaki, you look like a cinnamon roll, but can murder somebody.

You are commonly underestimated, which gives you the upper hand. A lot.

Tamaki taught you how to use that

Training with him was just so sweet.

He'd be scared to hurt you though

Let's add to the fact that since you like like an easy target, you would probably get messed with.

He would be the first to step in and protect you

Despite the fact his hands are shaking, and he stutters a mess.

“ my suneater. . My hero. ” you planted a soft kiss on his cheek.

Here lies Tamaki Amajiki, Rest In Peace

Don't even get me started on your dancing.

He loves it! Absolutely melts his heart.

When he watches you at recitals, rehearsals, maybe even in the dorms, he feels the depth of your movement.

He becomes a flustered mess in the distance,,,,

“ I can't believe thats my bunny, she's doing so well! ” he quietly cooed from the audience.

He will not miss any of your recitals. Unless it's an emergency.

Even then, get prepared for massive cuddles when he gets back.

He'll feel guilty about not being there, he's more upset than you are.

“ Tama it's fine- ” you chuckled softly, cradling your boyfriend in a hug.

“ are you sure bunny? I'm sure you did amazing, and I missed it! ” he whined, fighting the urge to plant his face onto a wall and never look back.

Other than tons of extra love after a missed performance, he will without a doubt dress fancy and bring you a bouquet and some little gifts.

100/10 will pepper you with compliments

Honestly he's an angel

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luciehercndale · 4 years

Text

Alastair Carstairs and Charles Fairchild: Uneven Love

In this essay I will try to be as brief as I can about what it meant to be part of the LGBTQ+ community at the beginning of the XX century and a few points on why Charles and Alastair were an uneven/unbalanced couple. Have a nice read!

Being gay in Victorian/Edwardian London

Legality of Charlastair’s relationship

Uneven relationship

Before I start delving into this topic, I just wanted to tell you a few things about what it meant being part of the LGBTQ+ community at the beginning of the XX century. I will briefly tell you about Great Britain specifically because the story is set in London, but you have to understand each country has its movements of emancipation and its laws, so there are a few things which may differ. I will also just mention about homosexual relationships at this time.

Being a gay man in London at the beginning of XX century wasn’t easy, because if two men were caught together in compromising positions, they could be arrested and detained and accused of buggery or attempted buggery. There was a law passed in 1885 which condemned public indecency between males, and such law won’t be abolished until the 60’s of the XX century. The only places gay men were allowed to be themselves were the Molly Houses. Those places were like modern taverns, pubs, coffeehouses where they could meet and engage in sexual activities with other gay men. Speaking of Charles and Alastair, I do wonder if they met in such a place, although since the former is so obsessed with keeping the appearances, maybe not. Or maybe he went in secret, but let’s not forget that in 1902 Alastair was 17.

Why is Charles so obsessed with his image?

For one, homosexuality was the opposite of the idea of “manliness” in Victorian/Edwardian age. During this period, what counted the most to British people was their image, how they appeared in public, and being gay was considered as a deviant act, an immortal act which was the evidence of a corrupt morality. A Victorian family had to be presentable, impeccable - the public sphere had to be pristine even if the private sphere was not. Charles Fairchild is a man of the public sphere because he’s sort of a politician’s figure who was born during the highest point Victorian mentality. It’s no wonder he is concerned with how others perceive him, and he sees his sexuality as a threat to his preferred career, which is all about “manliness”. Remember before Charlotte became Consul? Even there we saw the sexism of the Inquisitor and other members solely because Charlotte was not a man, hence, she couldn’t be “manly”. Charles would be regarded the same way, this is why he decided not to be openly gay. But mark my words, sooner or later he will because that is an inner conflict he has which is at war with his outer goal.

I’ve seen people say that one of the first reasons why Alastair and Charles’ relationship was not appropriate is because Alastair was 16 and Charles was 22. Of course I agree. I wanted to check whether it was legal or not in the XX century, and I discovered that after the Criminal Law Amendment Act passed in 1885, the age of consent was 16, which meant that as much as I find it repulsing, Alastair and Charles could have a relationship and they wouldn’t be breaking the law except for the not so little detail that they were homosexual. Like I said above, homosexuals could risk a prison sentence.

I want to tell you more about this topic but I don’t want to derail from the purpose of this essay.

First and foremost, from the interactions we had of them, you could tell Charles seemed to have promised things to Alastair, because when they speak in Chapter 11 of CoG, the latter is pained and all of his hopes are destroyed. “But you said - I thought” that is what Alastair says. That is the realization that he believed in Charles and what they shared in Paris. Charles says he doesn’t make “false promises”, which means that he may have already thought that their relationship could not be more than what it was - a secret affair. Secret because the act was illegal at the time, and affair because it’s clear Charles might have used Alastair’s affection to fuel his own ego.

I’m convinced that Charles may have an inferiority complex. His mother Charlotte is Consul, the first female Consul. I believe he admires her because despite being a woman, she could get this post because she is also very able with her job. Charlotte is someone Charles looks up to and wants to emulate, but as we see through CoG, Charles’ regent job is laughable. He slanders James, he seems to side with Tatiana whenever he is concerned without having evidence (you see, Tatiana may have manipulated Charles into doing what she wants). This is not what a promising Consul does, and Charles probably knows it.

Then why Alastair?

Why, you say? For one, Alastair also likes politics. I hope he likes politics because he wasn’t influenced by Charles, but I’m convinced that is what Charles and Alastair bonded on; politics. I could see Alastair also getting into politics, by the way, but this is a chat for another time.

Alastair, 17 year old Alastair, felt confident of baring his soul to Charles when they started getting acquainted. He was also very young, I think Charles was the first person that he recognized also loved men like he did. He lived in an age were homosexuality was punished, the majority of gay men tried to hide their sexuality not to be deemed immoral and deviant. I think Alastair was ecstatic that he had found someone he could like and who could like him back, and this is why he decided to be with Charles. We don’t know when this relationship started, but probably after 1899 and the Academy. Maybe Paris in 1902 was the first encounter they had because they couldn’t see each other all the time, maybe they had been together longer… I don’t know. I hate that we don’t know the exact timeline, but we may get it in the future.

I was saying. In Chapter 11 of CoG when Charles goes to Alastair’s house, he reveals that he loves him. “I have loved you since Paris,” Alastair says, which, like I said above, makes it impossible to define if they just had Paris and Alastair fell for him from that only moment of connection (because they might have had sexual interactions there, maybe Alastair lost his virginity to Charles - these are just my assumptions, I have no idea if I’m right).

The Paris affair also makes me think about: “We’ll always have Paris”, which is a famous line from Casablanca. What does it mean? The only thing the protagonists of that movie can hold onto is Paris, since WWII broke and they can only have the memory of what happened in Paris because they can’t be together/won’t be reunited. Rings a bell?

Before I also add how prophetic it was for Alastair to find Thomas in Paris at the same moment he was waiting to spend time with Charles - because it was indeed a coincidence, but also how tricky fate is. Alastair was probably already attracted to Thomas in Paris, but he was loyal to Charles, otherwise… but this is also a chat for another essay.

Then Alastair and Charles kiss. The way Charles treats Alastair is very controlling: he doesn’t just reply “You know I do” when A tells him he loves him, he leads the moment and draws Alastair towards him for a kiss. Then they end up on the sofa, Charles on top and Alastair under him - which isn’t very casual, is also a way for Charles to control everything, because he knows fine well Alastair loves him and he’s indulging into the moment because he doesn’t dislike A, but he also doesn’t love him. Alastair gives Charles the validation he isn’t getting in his political sphere. (See a few paragraphs above).

Sex is also a way to exert power. We don’t know Alastair’s and Charles’s private lives in detail, but from the ways this scene is written, I can tell Alastair is the type who bares himself for the one he loves. Now that his heart was broken I don’t know what to expect.

Then they stop. Alastair is in pain because he longed for Charles. Of all the things he could ask Charles, what does he ask?

“What is wrong, Charles?” he said, his voice husky and rough. “If this is not what you came for, then why are you here?”

I mean, what? Do you know the heaviness of this sentence? It means that most of Alastair and Charles’ interactions as a couple might have been lead by sex or by making out. Why do I think this? Because otherwise Alastair wouldn’t say that - he’s basically implying that most of the occurrences between them started because of something sexual…

“IF THIS IS NOT WHAT YOU CAME FOR…”

It makes me so mad. So mad. Because it is clear to me that after the Academy, Alastair was devastated and also regretful of his actions towards the other guys. He also had to take care of his family. He also points out how he managed his household when his father was “sick”, how Alastair has been a brother and a father and the head of the Carstairs family for longer than we can imagine. I understand why meeting Charles could have changed his life, but Alastair is a giver, he gives a lot to those he cares about, meanwhile Charles is a seeker, he also wants to feel loved but he can’t exchange the affection the same way.

We can consider Charles and Alastair’s relationship dead and gone, anyway. Not only because Alastair said he was done and understood that Charles just wanted to matter (his words, not mine) and that he only cares about his career. In the scene I mentioned above, we also know that the reason why Charles came to Alastair’s was to inform him that Barbara Lightwood had died. Metaphorically speaking, her death could also signify the death of Charlastair and the moment in which Thomastair’s door was truly open to explore.

Now to conclude my thoughts - which I hope weren’t too jumbled - I’ll just say that as much as he unnerves me, I do think Charles could have a nice arc if played well. But, my dears, without Alastair. This is for sure.

Footnote: If you want to know more this, especially concerning gender, you can read What is Gender History? By Sonya O. Rose which treats different topics.

#alastair carstairs #charles fairchild #thomas lightwood #the last hours #gender history #chain of gold #chain of iron #chain of thorns #charles and alastair #thomastair #alastair and thomas #tlh #tsc #the shadowhunter chronicles #tales from the shadowhunter academy #my edits

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lethal-k · 4 years

Text

Damsel (KTH)

I’m not gonna lie, this is probably the worst thing I have ever written. I’ve been so busy with work but I promise you that the next ones won’t be so bad. It’s also hard to find inspiration these days so if you wanna send in requests for BTS members, it would be helpful. This is kind of a short one. Also, would you guys be interested in my other non-BTS writing? Let me know ;) Heart it, reblog it, and follow me if you like it, love you all! Stay safe and borahae <3

Genre: Stranger to lovers!au

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Word Count: 944

Warnings: stalking, swearing, mentions of weapons, flirting, bad writing and no editing

Summary: Does fate exist? Maybe. If it does then it has one twisted way of bringing you and Taehyung together, the man that had to save you even though you two have never met a day in your life.

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You held out your phone, opening the camera and flipping it to face you. You pretended to look at your appearance, making sure it looked okay. That’s what it would hopefully look like to the man who had been following you for a few blocks now, a black hoodie covering their face, baggy jeans, and boots. However you were glancing in the camera, angling at a position to see if he was still behind you. He was.

He had been following you for five minutes, keeping a distance away. You don’t know if he was dumb enough to think you wouldn’t notice, seeing as there aren’t that many people on this street or if he was just daring enough. Either way you didn’t know if you could fight him with the pepper spray you had on your key chain or if he was too dangerous and had a weapon. You didn’t wanna take that chance. And it’s not like you’re being irresponsible walking out and about the streets at some ungodly hour of the night. It was merely 6pm, maybe 6:30 at the latest. The sun was still shining, it being golden hour.

‘What to do, Y/n. What should I do.’ You kept walking at a faster pace than normal while you panicked inside of your head. You looked around at your surroundings. No alleyways to escape into and use your pepper spray, a family of 3 were walking on the opposite side of the street but you didn’t wanna bring possible danger to the toddler and her two parents. None of your friends had answered your calls and you were scared. Terrified, to say the least.

‘This is it. I’m gonna die. I’m going to be kidnapped and be just another one of those faces on the missing persons descriptions on milk cartons. My mother will never see her child again.’ It was in the midst of your frantic thinking that your unbeknownst savior walked around the corner. You decided that this male, who you thought looked safe enough, was worth the chance of getting you to safety.

You sped walked up to him shouting, “Babe! There you are, I’ve been calling you for minutes now! Lets go get dinner or something.” You walked into his arms, pulling him into a hug despite the surprised and confused look on his face. You leaned up to his ear to whisper, “Please help me, this man has been following me for blocks now.”

The man relaxed in your hold, giving a fleeting glance to the shady figure a few meters back before saying loudly, “I’m sorry, darling. My phone is on silent. Where do you wanna eat?”

You visibly relaxed although you could still sense your stalker behind you, watching this unexpected encounter. “Oh nothing fancy, lets go to McDonalds or something.” You stated, hopefully loud enough for him to hear.

Your savior nodded, putting an arm around your shoulders and turning around to walk to the nearest McDonald's, which was only a few blocks away. As you were walking, you noticed how natural and how composed this man was. ‘He’s a good actor’ you thought. It almost seemed natural to lean into his side, whether it be to continue this couple act or because you wanted to was not clear to yourself, but hopefully it convinced your follower that you were dating this man who had his arm around you.

Thankfully, McDonald's was pretty busy. Busy. That meant people. Witnesses. In case your follower was psychotic enough to try to do anything in front of them. Thankfully, he wasn’t. He let out a small swear and turned around, walking in the other direction. He had given up. Once you glanced around in the line for food and didn’t see him, you let out a relieved sigh and moved away from the man who had saved you. As you two stood in line, you got to look at him. He was attractive. Long legs, built chest, biceps seemed large from what you could tell. His face though, was even prettier. He had a roundish face, puppy eyes, and plump lips. He had slightly messy and curly hair that fit him perfectly. You looked at him from head to two and god damn did this man have a great fashion sense, if the Gucci belt on his waist had anything to say.

You two received your order of nuggets and went to sit down.

You looked at him with a small smile, “Thank you so much…” You trailed off, realizing you didn’t even know this man’s name.

“Taehyung,” He smiled back, “and don’t worry about it. Just doing my manly duties and saving a damsel in distress.” He winked playfully at you.

You giggled while dipping a nugget in sauce, “Well I’m definitely a damsel and I was definitely in distress,” You joked before your smile faded a bit, “But seriously though, if you hadn’t helped me, I don’t even want to think what could have happened to me.” You took a bite of your nugget.

He shrugged, “Of course, it was no trouble, really. Plus, now I’m here on a dinner date with you. Happy ending.”

Your cheeks turned pink, “Yeah, I guess so.”

He smirked at you, “How about you pay me back for my oh so dutiful kindness with a proper date, m’lady?”

You laughed at his ridiculous language and nodded, “Of course, Sir Knight.”

You ended up giving Taehyung your number before he dropped you off at your apartment. If fate existed, then it had one twisted way of bringing you and Taehyung together. But you were glad that it did.

#bts #bts au #bts angst #bts smut #bts fluff #bts x reader #bts imagines #bts taehyung #bts taehyung x reader #taehyung x reader #tae x reader #taehyung imagine #taehyung au #bts namjoon #bts jin #bts yoongi #bts hosoek #bts jimin #bts jungkook

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billyhargroveinaponytail · 4 years

Text

“Good ole Dacre Montgomery”

Chapter 1: “Good Ole’ Billy Hargrove..”

Large bright lights covered the ceiling while long cords scattered the ground. Today had been Myra’s first day at her internship and she was nervous. The clipboard she had been given fumbled between her sweaty palms as she was led around the building with her adviser, he pointed out the different sets and explained their importance, the tour ended at a large table covered with every junk food and fruit you could think of. The adviser grabbed up an apple taking a large bite before waving Myra over to join him.

“Dive in, there’s something here I am sure you’ll enjoy!”

He gave her a friendly smile taking another bite from his apple, she glanced around before noticing a box of donuts from her favorite place, a place her family had gone to ever since she was little, it became a staple in their weekly trips to visit her grandparents.

She grabbed a pink sprinkle covered donut while a large hand reached forward grabbing for one as well, she glanced up and noticed a tall scruffy figure standing across the table from her. “Hello there,” He gave a wide grin, before laying his donut on his large plate. “I’m David, you must be the new intern!”

Myra nodded nervously, she knew exactly who he was, David Harbour the actor who played Jim Hopper the chief of police in their make believe town of Hawkins,Indiana. David was dressed in a pink and green geometric shirt that looked like something right out of Magnum PI, she was excited to see him out of the usual police uniform.

Myra spent her entire first year of college binging over season 1 with her roommate,Paisley. She liked a large majority of girls obsessed over Steve Harrington, Paisley even got them matching shirts and posters to decorate their room with. When season 2 finally aired Paisley found herself swooning over Steve more, where Myra found herself falling for Billy’s character, the bad boy of her dreams.

When Paisley first found out Myra would be doing her internship on the set of Stranger Things she went insane telling her about all the things she needed to know about the characters in real life and gave her items to get autographed by all of the cast. Myra was nervous to talk to anyone let alone ask them for their signatures.

“I am the new intern, my name is Myra!” She held her clipboard against her chest, trying to calm her unsteady breathing. “It’s great to meet you Ms. Myra. Hopefully you have a great time here and everyone treats you nice! If not you come find me and I will teach em’ a lesson!” he waved as he walked away, mouth filled with his donut. Myra returned the wave goodbye “It was nice meeting you too!”

“David is like the dad around here, always watching out for everyone and taking care of any situation that comes up! How about a tour of the trailers?” He grabbed a nutrition bar shoving it into his pocket before opening two large doors that lead out to a parking lot filled with trailers of all types.

“Since you will be working with the cast members, helping with costumes and just running errands I should probably introduce you to them!”

He led her by a large black trailer covered with windows that said -Classroom B12- on the front door. “This here is the classroom for the younger actors to get a few hours of education in each day and over here is the costume trailer, they kept every outfit for the main characters and even the background characters.” He motioned over to the tall trailer with multiple groups of people going in and out.

“Hair and makeup are located in the back here and I am sure a few cast members are inside so that will be our first stop.” He walked up the small set of stairs attached to the trailer door,knocking before entering inside. Three chairs sat in front of mirrors, wigs and special effects makeup were scattered across the stations.

In the first chair a young boy with curly hair sat having foundation applied, Gaten Matarazzo, the actor who played Dustin Henderson. He was the first to turn and offer his hand out to Myra after Jake, her adviser had introduced her to everyone.

“I’m Gaten, it's nice to meet you! Welcome to the cast!” Myra shook his hand, she glanced down at his shirt that read -Camp Know Where- it had been covered in what seemed like fake sweat, his face and arms showed the same dirty sweaty look to them. “It’s not real,promise!” He chuckled showing off his adorable toothless grin.

A red headed girl receiving the same sweaty treatment turned and waved, “I’m Sadie hopefully we don’t scare you away just yet! I was new here once and everyone was very welcoming we’re just one big family!”

Myra waved back nodding, “Oh no. you guys aren’t scaring me at all everyone here has been so welcoming, and it is greatly appreciated I have been super nervous about all of this!”

The two makeup artists introduced themselves, Mary and Jane. Myra chuckled a little at their names and they joined along “Trust us we’ve heard every joke you can think of!” Jane chimed in, while rubbing dirt across Sadie’s arms and face. “Do you mind closing that door behind you? The paparatize have been swarming around here like crazy!”

Myra turned and swung the door closed like she was asked to do when a sudden scream was heard on the other side “Damn!” She heard a male scream noticing his fingers slammed in the door. “Oh my I am so sorry!” She quickly opened the door, her eyes locked on his hands. “I had no idea you were coming up the stairs I am sorry!” She fumbled on her words as the makeup artist ran over in front of her with an ice pack. “It wouldn’t be the first time someone has fallen victim to these terrible doors.”

“I’m fine, Mary don’t worry!” An australian accent came from the man who now stood on the other side of the makeup artist. Myra stepped back getting a glance at him recognizing the familiar pornstache that laid across his lip, Myra James just slammed Dacre Montgomery’s fingers in the door, making an absolute fool of herself. Her clipboard was instantly raised over her red blushing face.

Dacre,holding the ice pack to his fingers, stepped around Mary taking a seat in the empty chair. “Dacre this is Myra, the new intern!” He looked up from his hand with a breathtaking smile, “Well Myra don’t you have a way with introductions!” She shook her head, her face going even brighter red now, “Again I am so very sorry!” She rambled on more,trying to avoid eye contact with him.

“There’s no need to apologize, you’re welcome to smash my fingers anytime you’d like!” He smirked a little before being turned in his chair by Jane as she greased back his hair and placed a wig cap on him. “You ready mullet man?” She chuckled, grabbing a wig off of the styrofoam head and placing it over Dacre’s head. “Aw there he is everyone, good ole’ Billy Hargrove! Are you ready for the spray tan now?”

Jake handed Myra a large envelope of paper and a friendly smile as he ended his phone call, “well this is where we part way Miss. I will be just a phone call away if you need anything,” He quickly wrote down his number sticking the paper on top of the others, if these guys need anything you’ll be here to help! Good luck and try not to break any more fingers,’ight?” He nodded before his phone began ringing again and he quickly exited the trailer.

“Here, set your stuff here and you can help throw some spray tan on this pale boy!” Jane took the stack of papers from Myra laying them on the empty spot of her desk and handing her a bottle of tanning lotion. “Now don’t actually throw anything at me!” Dacre joked as he removed his shirt moving over to a plastic tarp Mary had laid down. Jane squeezed a small amount onto her hand before placing it on his chest, “He is fully capable of applying this himself but he enjoys making us do all the work!” She rolled her eyes as she applied more to him.

Myra’s entire body froze looking at his fit sculpted body standing in front of her and if it couldn’t have gotten worse he removed his jeans leaving himself in his boxers in front of the group. “I-uh how about I start on your legs? Yeah?” Dacre nodded, holding his legs out for her as she placed the lotion into her hands before running in down his calves. The two girls shared stories back and forth about the season two wig Dacre had to wear and how it was nowhere as nice as this one was, Dacre rolled his eyes at them, “you two are ridiculous it wasn’t that bad! Right Myra?” He glanced down at her pouring more lotion into her hand.

“Oh well I am a big fan of these curls, they’re cute!” She remembered the conversations Paisley and her had had about the wig from season 2 and how fake it looked but this one was a whole lot better and she couldn’t wait to tell Paisley all about it, each night they talked for two hours over Facetime talking all about how her day was going and all the things she had gotten to see and do.

Of course she did sign a waiver saying she wouldn’t share any topic secret things or spoilers with the public but she everything she was able to share. She was sure to tell Paisley all of it.

“Cute? It’s a manly mullet, it's not supposed to be cute!” He flipped the wig hair off of his shoulder trying to hold back a laugh, “So have they told you much about this season? Other than the obvious?” Myra finished with his leg and stood wiping her hands on a towel as Mary finished off his back and other leg.

“Well they told me about the mall and the new characters Robin and Alexi, I was also told that we’d get to see a lifeguard Billy!” She pointed over to an outfit hanging in the corner, a white tank top and red shorts with a whistle attached.

“It’s going to be an exciting season trust me!” He was leaning back in the chair as the wig was glued down to his head and a blonde highlighting dye was brushed through his mustache. Mary dipped a small brush into a pallet placing freckles around the bridge of his nose and cheek bones. She then sprayed his face down and handed him the clothes on the hanger “Go get dressed! They’ll be calling for you soon!” Myra smiled at the cute dimples and freshly tanned look, this was a new look for Billy and she loved it.

Mary finished the last few touches of Dacre’s tan and quickly sprayed a layer of hairspray over his wig helping the small curls stay in place. Static and a broken voice came through the walkie talkie on the counter followed by a man saying “Dacre on set,Dacre needed on set!”

Jane handed Dacre his robe to cover up as he stood from the chair and checked his reflection in the mirror, “Not too bad for your first time,this was your first time right? Applying tanning lotion to a man?” He tied off his robe around his waist and glanced up at Myra with a curious smile.

“Yes you were definitely my first, I have never in my life applied lotion to a man let alone sun tan lotion!” She smiled through the nervous twisting in her stomach,she ran her hand up her arm placing small pinches on it.

She wasn’t dreaming this was all real, Dacre was actually talking to her and not just talking he was what seemed like flirting with her. She couldn’t wait to get back to her trailer and tell Paisley all about this, she was going to die.

“Myra how about you follow with us?,” Jane placed a hand on her shoulder waking her from her trance, “We usually stay with him in case he needs a touch up of tanning lotion, you wanna tag along?” Myra nodded “Yes that sounds great! I’ll help carry this then.” She grabbed a small caddy from the desk including tanning lotion,freckle makeup and hair spray inside.

“Great well let’s get going before they start bugging us.” Jane swung open the trailer door, the bright morning sun rose peering in at them, Dacre took a large pair of glasses from his pocket placing them over his eyes,before moving his robe hood over his hair.

“The paparazzi are desperate for photos so we have to hide as much as we can.” Myra followed behind them, glancing over at the crowd of men and woman cameras held high trying to get any photo they could for their employers.

“Does it become exhausting? The paparazzi and sneaking around?” Myra held the caddy in her right hand standing to the side of Dacre helping to shield him from the groups. “At times yes, but it’s a small price to pay for something I love doing and I am blessed to be here.” Down to earth and good looking this guy was too good to be true, like something two teenage girls made in a science lab.

“How about you huh? Finding out you were going to be working on a popular tv show was it exciting? Overwhelming?” They were led into a small community pool that had a large group of people in 80s themed swimwear waiting around. All heads turned when Dacre walked up like a scene from a movie, cue the seductive music.

“Both,” She chuckled, “It was overwhelming and exciting. I had no idea it was going to be a show this popular when they offered me the internship, but after I found out and word quickly spread people I had never met before were trying to be friends with me and ask information about the show, let’s just say you and Steve are some popular guys.”

He laughed thinking about all the friends requests and followers he received after season 2 aired. “I’m happy you’re here! It’s going to be a fun time-” His sentence was cut short by the director directing him to head into the locker room for the first scene.

Myra stepped back with Jane to stand behind the crowd of people, “ This is going to be so exciting, the first scene is always so fun, we just get to sit back and relax,keeping an eye on Dacre and that insane wig.” Jane sat down in a directors chair that had -H&M team- labeled on the back, Myra took a seat next to her, setting the caddy on her lap.

Four women came from the trailer area decked out head to toe in their 80s gear, she recognized the blonde in a teal and pink split bathing suit, Cara Buono, the actress who played Karen Wheeler, Mike and Nancy Wheeler’s mother.

Myra thought back to the night Paisley and her had watched the scene where Billy’s character met her for the first time, it left them all hot and bothered. Now her mind ran curious, was Billy going to have a scene with Karen? Myra crossed her legs leaning back in the tall black chair as the large crowd of people got into the pool water and filed themselves in at different scenes around the pool.

There was a group of teens chatting, some stood around the snack stand and a small built black haired girl sat perched upon the lifeguard chair, this must be Heather Holloway, Myra had heard Jake mentioning her before in the lineup of new characters joining the show.

“Quit on set!!” The director yelled over the crowd of roaring people, everyone turned in attention waiting for further directions. “We’re going to start off with the Billy entrance scene and work our way from there!” The camera was then placed to face the diving board where a young boy stood waiting for his cue, he wore a green tank top and small swim trunks, he reminded her of her brother, he always wore a shirt when swimming and was a chunkier boy when they were younger.

“Action!” The director yelled as the boy ran forward splashing into the water. Crowds of people began conversing while others splashed around in the pool, the speakers from the pool played ‘Rock this Town’ by The Stray Cats, the camera was then panned across the crowd, a group of kids playing marco polo and multiple beach balls bounced around between people. The camera stopped on the four women from earlier, including Karen.

They were reading and checking their complexions in their hand mirrors, the music then slowed down to a mute as the large haired,cheetah print lady tilted her glasses down in the direction of the lifeguard chair. “Ladies, she’s coming down.” She kept her stare towards Heather as the other women looked in that same direction.

Heather made the last few steps off the ladder and made her way towards the locker rooms, the ladies quickly gathered themselves, adjusting their bathing suits and pushing up their large hair. The black haired one, with a large purple pearl necklace, on the far right arched her leg up and faced the men’s locker room, the same room Dacre had just entered earlier, “It’s showtime!” Cheetah print spoke in a seductive voice as she closed her compact mirror, ‘Moving in Stereo” by The Cars began playing through the speakers.

“Action Dacre!” Yelled the director from behind the camera,the locker door swung open and there he stood tanned and muscular, his shorts just below his trimmed waist line, he began strutting out, catching everyone’s eye on the way by. An ear-splitting noise came from the whistle he had placed between his plumped lips, he turned his body to the direction of the same young boy from earlier who was now running around.

“Hey lardass, no running on my watch,” He spoke as the whistle fell from his lips, the entire pool stood motionless. “I gotta warn you again and you’re banned for life, you wanna be banned for life lardass?” The young boy quickly shook his head no, “didn’t think so!” He placed the whistle between his lips again letting out another deafening noise.

The crowd left their frozen state and began yelling and playing as they were. Dacre made his way towards the lifeguard chair passing by the group of women who had been patiently waiting for him. “Afternoon ladies.” He spoke with a welcoming nod. “Afternoon Billy!” They spoke in perfect harmony.

“Dig the new suit Mrs. Wheeler.” He stared at the perfectly fit mom, whom he had had an amazing scene with in season 2. Myra couldn’t wait to tell Paisley all about this, hopefully she would be allowed to. Dacre made his way up to the lifeguard chair before the director yells “Cut!” Groups of people went in their different directions, receiving notes from their superiors.

“So what did you think?” A hand was placed on the back of Myra’s chair,she glanced up to see Dacre’s smiling face looking down at her. “Lardass? Really?” She turned in the chair to face him,his gold Saint Christopher necklace dangled in her face. “It’s what they wrote in the script.” He shrugged giving a flirting smile, he was way too good at that maybe it was just his normal smile and Myra was just taking it too far.

A few guys walked up talking with Dacre while Jane pulled Myra away to introduce her to more people, Matt and Ross Duffer, the directors of the show, were absolute sweethearts. The Duffer Brothers were very personal with everybody making sure to get to know everyone. “How about some lunch before the next scene?” Jane turned to Myra,while taking the caddy from her hands. “Lunch sounds great! Let me grab my phone.” Myra made her way back to her chair where her phone laid, she quickly picked it up and followed behind Jane.

A notification popped up on her phone -6 text messages-, Paisley was always keeping Myra up to date on what was going on back at school, it helped her feel included but nothing really changed. Paisley’s arch enemy was still dating Paisley’s crush and Myra’s ex was still asking about her, but Myra still appreciated all the updates.

The lunch room was filled with loads of cast and crew members, it felt like high school again different clicks were all sitting together in their different sections. Myra made her way over to the buffet table where she grabbed a tray and made her way down the line gathering a sandwich and a container of fruit. She turned to face the large group questioning where to sit, when a familiar figure walked up beside her.

“New here?” Joe Keery, the actor who plays Steve Harrington was now standing beside her. “I am! I’m Myra James. I am a new intern!” His hair was just as fabulous in person as it looked on tv. “Well Hiya Myra I am Joe it’s a pleasure to meet you. Found yourself a place to sit yet?” He looked around the crowded room before his eyes stopped at what seemed to be his usual seat,the people already sitting there had even saved a seat for him.

“Come with me James we will get you a place to sit down!” He nudged her arm and walked in the direction of that table, Sadie, Gaten, and three other familiar boys sat around. “Myra this is Sadie, Gaten, Caleb, Noah and Fin.” Myra gave them all a friendly wave. “I actually had the opportunity to meet Sadie and Gaten early today.”

She placed her tray down before taking a seat, Joe followed. “Well what about me huh?” Dacre sat his tray down next to Myra,he had now covered his bare chest with a Hawkins lifeguard tank top. He took a seat next to her,his sweet smelling cologne hitting her hard in the face. She didn’t notice it before maybe he had just recently applied it, either way it was nice.

“What about you?” Myra smirked,placing her fork to her mouth taking a small bite from the fruit cup. “What did you think of meeting me?” He leaned his arm against the table keeping his glare locked with hers. She reached out for his swollen fingers, “Well you were a sweetheart even after I almost broke your fingers so I’d say you were pretty great!” He left his hand in hers and enjoyed her warm touch.

Myra hadn’t even noticed,she had relaxed her hand onto his leg. “So this is the girl who almost removed your fingers and then rubbed you down with tanning oil?” Steve chimed in with a mouth full of food, breaking the tension between them. Myra quickly released his hand and grabbed her water and took a small drink. “It was all an accident I swear!” Dacre and Joe began bickering back and forth when Myra’s phone buzzed on the table.

Paisley: “ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW? You met Billy and put lotion on his legs? -heart eye emoji-

Myra: “Yes and let's just say that man has incredible legs.” -8 heart eye emojis-

Paisley: “You better call me tonight with all the details. Also if you guys hook up def let me know!”

Myra: “Of course and that won’t be happening you perv!”

Myra laughed at the gif Paisley included of Billy leaning against the doorway of Karen Wheeler’s home from season 2. Joe and Dacre stopped and glanced down at her phone, “What’s so funny there?” Joe raised his brow looking closer. Myra realized and locked the phone blocking it from either of their views. “Just something a friend sent,nothing important-” Her sentence was cut short when the loud man’s voice from earlier echoed through the room. “Everyone return to set,everyone return to set!”

“I am still interested in knowing what was so funny.” Dacre took both his and Myra’s trays to the return bin and walked beside her back to the pool area. “Are you going to stay for this next scene or do you have somewhere else you have to be?”

Myra glanced at the small sheet of paper that was stuffed into her back pocket, “Nope I am all yours for the rest of the day, tomorrow they have me somewhere else!” “Oh yeah? All mine?” he smirked through his laugh. “Lucky me!”

“Not at all what I meant,” She rolled her eyes, but in all honesty she wouldn’t mind being all his. “Don’t make me break your other fingers!” Dacre was quickly ripped away to join Cara “Karen” and directors huddling around the pool.

Myra found her way over to the chair she had been sitting in previously and again she was joined by both Jane and Mary. “How was lunch?” Jane turned to face Myra,crossing her legs,”Did you find anything yummy?” Myra nodded, placing her phone into her back pocket. “I did, I found a sandwich and some fruit!” From the corner of her eye she noticed Dacre glancing in her direction, she gave a friendly wave.

“You gotta be careful with that dessert table you’ll gain weight quicker than you can say “Hot fudge sundae”, “Looks like somebody’s striked up Dacre’s interest, he hasn’t taken his eyes off of you since you sat down!”

Myra’s cheeks instantly heated up, she had noticed but she didn’t think anyone else had. “Oh uh yeah, he’s sweet, we actually had lunch together and I finally got to meet Joe, Caleb,Noah and Fin.”

“That’s awesome, they’re great kids! Extremely talented too!” Myra became distracted as Dacre removed his tank top walking in their direction. “You mind holding this? They’d kill me if I lost another one of these shirts!” He held the shirt in Myra’s direction and she quickly took it displaying a huge smile.

“Yeah of course, it’s safe right here with me!”

“Places everyone!” The director yelled from the crowd of people standing behind the camera. The pool crowd returned to their spots and Karen got into the water beginning to do laps in the lane closest to the lifeguard chair.

“Quiet on set!” a young man yelled, holding a clapperboard in front of the camera lense. Dacre returned to his seat at the lifeguard chair and placed his glasses back over his eyes. “Action!” He yelled and the scene began with people walking across the pool, kids laughing and playing around. The camera followed Karen doing the backstroke down the lane, before moving to face Billy who seductively removes his glasses giving the camera a lustful stare.

Hot Blooded by Foreigner began playing as they did another close up on Karen moving through the water. The camera was then panned back and forth between Karen and Billy as he placed his whistle against his lips, his tongue gently caressing it, was it weird for her to be jealous of a whistle? Where were the good looking lifeguards when she was spending every summer at the pool with her brother and the two neighbor kids she used to babysit.

Karen climbed the pool ladder, running her hands through her drenched hair, behind the camera Dacre was making his way over to her,before the camera had turned to face him, he smiled towards Myra shooting her a quick smile. She could have easily melted into a puddle at that moment, the chair may have been the only thing keeping her up.

“Looking good out there Mrs.Wheeler!” Billy spoke as he approached Karen holding out a towel for her. “Why thank you!” She reached out taking the towel from his grip.

“Perfect form,” He replied with alternative motives. “Well your form is amazing!” Her eyes streamed up his perfectly tan body, that Myra had helped create just a few hours prior. Billy gave her a devious smile,showing off his perfectly white teeth. “I’m sorry, I have seen you teaching lessons,swimming lessons.”

This would be another moment she could imagine Paisley and her wrapped up on her bed watching the tv swooning over, this would be a scene that would get them all hot and bothered, something they would be talking about for the next couple weeks. But unlike that moment Myra was actually living this moment and it was so much better than watching it through a screen.

“I could teach you if you’d like.” He slowly licked his bottom lip before letting the words leave his mouth,Myra felt as if she was literally about to drool all over herself, everything was just breathtaking, the small slit in his eyebrow, the small patch of hair below his bottom lip,the way his perfectly crafted curls twirled around the shape of his face. Jane had caught her off guard by nudging her elbow into her side, she glanced in her direction and Jane raised her eyebrow at Myra, “Good scene right?” Myra tried to play it cool by giving a small chuckle. ‘Perfect scene’ she had thought to herself.

When her attention was back to Billy and Karen she watched him slowly place a piece of gum into his mouth,Karen’s face went blank before her towel fell from her grip hitting the floor, both her and Billy immediately reached down for it, showing off his the swim trunks that were just the perfect amount of snug on him. “I didn’t think you taught adults.” Karen's blushed face questioned him.

“Well I offer uh more advanced lessons to select clientele.” The entire time he spoke he was chomping away at his gum, Myra had always found this to be annoying but somehow when he did it, it put her into a trance the world around her went silent and her main focus was him.

“Come to think of it there is a good pool out at motel 6 on Cornwallis, it’s very quiet, you know, very private. Shall we say tonight? 8 o’clock?” Billy’s face could not get any closer to Karen, his eyes were locked with hers and their body’s pressed so close.

“I’m sorry I can’t!” Karen shook her head,leaving Billy’s face shocked with disbelief. Myra had the same expression plastered on her face as well, how could anyone tell him no. “Can’t what? Have fun?” Billy was really trying hard, props to whomever had written this script, so far Myra was hooked and she hadn’t seen anyone elses scene or any of the other stories going on.

“Mrs.Wheeler,” He shot a large smile flashing his dimples in the direction of Myra and Jane, maybe he was just told to look in that direction, maybe there was someone behind the two of them that he happened to be glancing at. Didn’t matter though Myra had herself convinced he was smiling right at her.

“I just don’t think I need any lessons..” Karen shot her eyes away from Billy’s deepened glare. Billy puffed out his chest and towered himself over Karen. “Oh you see I think you do. I just don’t think you’ve had the right teacher.” Karen mumbled something before Billy replied “It will be the workout of your life.” She nodded before the director yells “Cut!” stopping the entire scene.

This was something Paisley and Myra had been talking about all last season, they were dying to know if Karen and Billy were going to do it and this might finally answer their questions. Dacre grabbed a towel and wiped his lower stomach before walking in their direction, Myra fictitiously picked up her jaw and whipped her mouth adjusting herself in the seat.

“So?” He gave Myra a sweet smile as he took a seat next to her in Jane’s empty chair. “So what?” She returned the same smile,crossing her legs and turning his way. “So what did you think?” He reached out for his tank top he had handed to Myra previously.

“Hmm well I do have one question, do Billy and Karen finally have sex?” She tried to hold a serious face unsuccessfully. “Being a fan of you two I am hoping it finally happens!” She felt herself getting a little too egger and took a few short breaths to slow herself down. Dacre’s eyes widened,taking in a deep inhale before releasing a large laugh. “That’s all you’ve got to say about that? Do Billy and Karen have sex? Also did you say you were a fan?” He gave a cocky smirk,subtly flexing his arms towards her.

Myra rolled her eyes, his cockiness was such a turn on and that sweet accent of his made it even better. It was definitely a change to hear him go from Billy to Dacre with his voice, a change she could get used to. “Yes I am a fan, why else would I want to be working here! My friend Paisley and I used to watch this show religiously when it first came out. It was the reason we became such good friends.” He nodded becoming more interested in her words.

“Well then I can’t tell you if they have sex I have to keep it a surprise so you will keep coming around!” She shook her head in defeat, “I planned on coming around either way! I mean I am really liking Billy this season so far.” Myra tried her hardest to flirt but her nerves still stood on edge. “It only gets better trust me!” Dacre pulled his tank top over his head,she noticed his fingers were still swollen and bruised over the make up Mary had applied to him.

“Again I am so sorry about those! I am sure it’s not good for your character..” She hesitated not wanting to be the blame. “Nah don’t be sorry it makes him look tough!” He reached out for her leg giving a comforting pat. His expression quickly changed as he glared behind Myra, she turned to notice Jake approaching them.

“Hey there My,” Jake gave an over the top smile, something that he looked accustomed to. Myra had always hated being called My, the girls who bullied her her entire high school years called her My and hearing it again made her sick. “How was your day? Did you enjoy yourself?” Dacre leaned back in the chair, everything about him changed in seconds, his posture was different, he looked angry.

“I did enjoy myself, this was an incredible opportunity, I am still so grateful for all of this!” Jake quickly nodded off her reply and offered to escort her back to her small trailer for the evening. “That would be great,” She noticed how quickly it was getting dark,this day had gone by so fast. “It was great meeting you Dacre! Thank you for the entertainment!” She gave him a heartfelt smile and stood from her chair standing beside Jake.

Myra hadn’t been to her trailer yet, she was told it would be in the lot with the other actors and actresses but when she arrived this morning she went right to work and had no time to unpack or see her home for the next couple months. “Have a goodnight Myra. It was great meeting you as well, I hope to see you around!” The sides of Dacre’s mouth pulled up into a small smile.

Jake wrapped his arm around Myra’s back, “Off to the trailer’s we go! There is around the clock security and if you ever need anything my trailer is actually just two down from yours.” Myra approached a large trailer, something that could sleep an entire family. “This is not at all what I thought it would be like!” She had never slept in a camper before, anytime her family went camping her dad required them to rough it and sleep in tents.

“I hope it works for you! There is food in the fridge and small hotel soap and shower supplies in the bathroom, if you happen to need anything or run out there is a small store down the road they’re open 24/7 and the security can help you get there!” Jake dug around in his pocket before opening the large door, the inside was beautiful. A large leather sectional took up the far left side, opposite from that a large tv and entertainment center stood with a fireplace below that,next a large kitchen area complete with a microwave,stove,sink and even a full size fridge.

Jake led Myra down the dark hard wood floors into the large room at the end and a large king size bed took up the majority of it,he then led Myra to the opposite end where a full size bathroom with a huge shower was included, there was even a vanity above the sink. This trailer put Myra’s apartment to shame, she would never want to leave this place.

Jake walked back to the kitchen area, laying a folder down on the small dining table, “This is your schedule for tomorrow. If you need anything at all again please stop by! I will leave you to it, you have an early day tomorrow!” He leaned in for what seemed like a hug but it caught Myra off guard, “Oh sorry,” She quickly reached her hand out to him to offer him a handshake. “Have a goodnight Jake!” She closed and locked the trailer door behind him.

She turned around and took in the incredible area again, “Wow..” She spoke to herself. She realized she would need to go to her car and get her belongings, she glanced out the window to the parking lot containing everyone’s vehicles, she had her phone flashlight and it wasn’t too far away she was sure she could make it on her own.

Myra slid back on her shoes she had removed at the door. She grabbed the keys Jake had left by the door and turned on her light making her way outside. The Georgia air got very cold very quickly at night time,she held her light in front keeping it pointed at the ground not wanting to bother anyone in their trailers. She reached the parking lot gate and held her light to the keypad,quickly punching in the 4 digit code.

The gate made a loud beep before sliding open enough for her to slip inside. She drove a 2006 black Jeep Wrangler and it looked pitiful in this parking lot filled with high end expensive cars. The entire back seat was stuffed full with Myra’s belongings, she threw on her backpack and grabbed two large containers before kicking her door shut and locking it up.

A black Sedan drove by and two men excited the vehicle making their way over to the keypad, the tall man in front entered a couple unsuccessful numbers and the shorter man behind him tried as well, still being unsuccessful. Myra hadn’t noticed at first but the second man had a camera wrapped around his neck, maybe these guys were with the paparazzi maybe they thought someone famous was over here and they were trying to break in, she sat down her boxes quickly dialing Jake’s number.

A large boom of people talking in the background muted Jake's voice. “Jake? It’s Myra. I think something is going on. I am in the parking lot and two guys are trying to break in..” She spoke softly not wanting the two gentlemen to hear her. They continuously shook at the gate trying to force it open. “Myra? What did you say? Two guys?” Myra sighed speaking a little louder. “There are two guys trying to break into the parking lot! They’re banging on the gate! I am stuck in here!” Jake’s tone quickly changed,”Shit!” He spoke the words harshly leaving his mouth. “I am on my way right now!” Myra hung up the phone, staying put on the ground next to her car, she had the perfect view of the gate keeping an eye on them.

A few minutes went by when George, the security guard that she met when she arrived approached the gate with two other men. The paparazzi quickly scattered in two different directions and George opened the gate,making his way around through the cars, the two others followed closely behind him.

“Myra!” He spoke, shining his large light around on the ground. “Over here!” she quickly popped up,both of her boxes in her hands. “First day here and you’re already causing trouble?” He chuckled, taking the two containers from her. George was a tall african american man who had a comforting vibe to him,but from what Jake had told her he was trained in 6 different types of martial arts and served 26 years in the Army.

“I didn’t mean to cause any trouble, they-they were just trying to break in,they probably assumed I was someone more important!” Myra shoved her keys back into her pocket and grabbed her purse from the ground as well. “You are important, you know a lot of information about the show and those guys are desperate!” Jake stepped from behind George offering to take some things from Myra, she shook her head “I’ve got it don’t worry! I guess I didn’t think of that!”

The other guy behind George stepped forward removing the hood off of his head. It was Dacre he gave Myra a soft comforting smile, “I am glad you are ok! You want me to help you back to your trailer?” George’s walkie talkie on his shoulder began calling a few codes,” I should probably check this out, you two can help her back to the trailers and if you need anything else at all, here is my card!” Myra reached out taking the business card from his fingers. “Thank you again George, I will!”

As the three of them walked across the road back to their trailer Myra finally realized they had both arrived there together. “Did Jake call you?” She glanced over at Dacre,his hoodie covering his head again. “No we were at the cast party together and we happened to be talking when you called. I can give you my number if you want, you know if you ever wanna talk..” He spoke with hesitancy, something Myra hadn’t experienced him due yet, was he actually nervous?

“Cast party?” She moved closer to him, a little curious. Jake had a dumbfounded look come across his face, “Oh uh yeah after the first day of filming they usually throw a party for the cast, I assumed since you had an early morning you wouldn’t want to come.” Dacre made a disappointed sigh, “If I would have known I would have invited you..I’m sorry!” As they approached her trailer Myra pulled out her keys and quickly opened the door.

“No, no it’s alright Jake is right I do have an early morning and I need to unpack and rest.” She took the containers from Jake’s arms and walked them inside. “You guys have a great night, thank you again for the help. I will see you in the morning!” She closed the door behind her before noticing Dacre's small wave goodbye.

Myra began digging through the containers, pulling out her clothes and shoes she would need for tomorrow. She hung up all of her outfits before walking over to the large fridge hoping to find something sweet inside. A plate of brownies sat on the top shelf with a note that said “Welcome to the Crew”. She unwrapped two,grabbed up her shower supplies and carried them inside the bathroom, where she began undressing. She finished off the two small brownies and twirled her hair up into a ponytail.

The shower temperature was very confusing. It was either really hot or really cold so it took Myra a while to adjust it perfectly, she got inside and let the warm water pour down her back. Her door water was never warm Paisley always took boiling hot showers that surprisingly didn’t leave blisters all over her body and unfortunately Myra’s classes weren’t over until after Paisley’s so when it was her time to shower she was left with icicles hanging all over her body.

A loud vibration came from the counter alerting Myra that Paisley had been calling, she quickly got out wrapping a towel around her body, “Hello Pais!” She spoke with excitement,she could not wait to tell her everything! “Myra James! Tell me everything!” She held the corner of her towel tightly in her grip,walking over to her new large neatly made bed. ”Well I was up at 5 am this morning and spent 2 hours getting a tour of the set and signing a bunch of paperwork.”

Paisley sighed into the phone “Myra Josaphine James you know exactly what I am talking about, tell me about Dacre! Was he nice? Did you two hook up?” Myra laughed,grabbing her sweatshirt and pulling it over her head before she ran her brush through her damp hair. “Yes he was very nice, I got to actually sit through a couple scenes he did..with Karen!” Paisley gasped in shock. “With Karen!? That means Baren is happening!” Baren was the couple name Paisley had made up for Karen and Billy and she was determined to believe it would happen.

“Well it might be happening, Billy is a lifeguard this season, him and Karen had an amazing scene today at the pool and things got hot! Billy is going to be teaching her lesson at a private motel pool!” Myra pulled back the cover,laying out on her cool satin sheets. “How are you containing yourself? I would be jumping that boy’s bones, especially after seeing a Billy and Karen scene. I mean you did say he was being nice to you, maybe he’s wanting a big ol’ slice of Myra pie!” Paisley laughed hysterically into the phone,she was a perv but it was one of Myra’s favorite things about her.

“He was just being nice that is it! I am new here and he was just making me feel welcomed!” Myra turned on the small light on the overhead compartment and lowered the main rooms light. “Ok new couple then Myra and Dacre, Macre!” She squealed with excitement. “You need to get your flirting on, maybe something special might happen!” Myra could hear the seduction in her voice. “Yeah.. probably not.”

Myra laughed in return. Talking to Paisley helped with her homesickness, it made everything seem normal again like they were sitting in their dorm together sharing stories, not 5 hours away from each other in completely different states. Myra finished her phone call with Paisley before she hung up and drifted off to sleep.

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