Tumgik
#or any decisions besides 'lie there and wait until you need to go to bed'
couriersiccs · 1 year
Text
i know that the point IS the pushing of the boulder up the hill, and not ever reaching the top of the hill because it was always going to be juuust outside your reach by the time exhaustion catches up with you and sends you careening back down towards the bottom to start climbing all over again
but for once can it just be about getting to the top and having a nice rest and then rolling back down the hill to start again? by choice? can i catch up for once and just feel accomplished for a second before deciding for myself, not for gravity’s unrelenting sake, to push another stupid rock up another stupid hill?
4 notes · View notes
navybrat817 · 1 year
Note
Tumblr media
Look at that stare!
Time to Study
Summary: Bucky told you he needed help with his studies, but you should have known he just wanted an excuse to kiss you.
Pairing: College!Bucky Barnes x Female Reader Word Count: Over 1.2k Warnings: K-I-S-S-I-N-G, college AU, nicknames, Bucky Barnes (yep, he's a warning) A/N: Okay, lovelies. Meet Titan and Starshine in the college AU no one asked for, Falling For You. Thank you @rookthorne, @sgt-seabass, and @chasingmarvel!❤️ Not beta read and written on my phone, so any and all mistakes are my own. Please follow @navybrat817-sideblog for new fics and notifications. Comments, reblogs, feedback are loved and appreciated!
Tumblr media
"Bucky, I think you've been on that page for the last five minutes."
He shrugged and continued to stare, his blue eyes focused completely on you. A smile began to spread across your face before you cleared your throat and glanced at your book. Your face heated up when you still felt his gaze on you. With the looks of a model and a smile that could make panties drop, it was almost overwhelming to have his attention.
But you liked it.
“Why didn’t we meet in the library?” you asked, suddenly aware of how hot it was in your room.
Or was it him?
You were also aware of how close he was to you on your bed. You could’ve chosen to sit in a chair or on the floor, but you made the decision to take your bed. He followed suit and kept a reasonable distance. But he moved closer with each passing second until his knee almost bumped yours.
No way in hell were you going to stop him.
“It’s more comfortable here,” he replied. You tried not to lose yourself in his eyes when you dared to look at him. “Don’t you think?”
Your heart fluttered in your chest as you nodded. You even managed not to whimper when he placed his hand on your thigh. With his sleeve pushed up, you could see the veins in his forearm, a visual reminder of his strength. He didn’t slide his hand up any higher or apply any pressure. It rested there, like he was testing the waters.
Come on in. The water’s fine.
"It is, but I thought you said you needed my help," you reminded him when he made no move to read or look over his notes.
Some assumed that because Bucky was good looking, athletic, and a member of the most popular fraternity on campus that he got people to do his work for him. That couldn't have been further from the truth. He was a nice, smart guy, much smarter than most expected. And while he didn't brag about his grades, he more than earned his high GPA through his intelligence and hard work.
The whole package. Wait, why does he need my help again?
"Stop staring!" you said, trying your hardest not to smile when he lightly chuckled. It was such a sexy sound. "We need to study."
"Oh. I actually finished studying before I stopped by. You know I’m getting an A in that class," he smirked, shutting the book and moving it beside him. "Or did I forget to mention that?"
It was your turn to stare at him, your mouth open when he flashed his winning smile.
Smug. Bastard.
"You lied to me, Bucky Barnes."
He pouted before he smiled again. "I didn't lie. I would never lie to you.”
His hand went to the back of your neck as you tried to remember to breathe. "Yes, you did,” you huffed, not wanting to let him off the hook. Even if he distracted you the more he leaned in, his fingertips tickling your skin. “You said you needed my help. I cleared my whole afternoon."
Like he had to twist my arm to make that happen.
"I do need your help. I need a kiss and you’re the only one who can help me with that,” he argued, his nose bumping yours. “And if you want me to maintain my high GPA, I'll need to study every single one of your kisses thoroughly. Even if it takes all night."
That would’ve been cheesy from anyone else, but he made it sound so genuine.
“You’re ridiculous,” you giggled, running your fingers through his soft hair. His words flustered you and you wondered if he noticed. "What would your brothers say if they heard you?"
Ridiculous and charming and handsome and he smells good and his lips are so close to mine.
“Being ridiculous doesn’t change the fact that I need a kiss,” he said, breathing against your lips. "And no mention of my brothers when you're in my arms. Only me."
Only you, Bucky.
“After I’m done studying,” you whispered with a twinkle in your eyes.
He growled when you giggled again, but didn’t give you the chance to move away. One day you'd get out of one of his holds, but today wasn't it. “Just one little kiss, Starshine? Any kind of kiss you want as long as I get one.”
You sucked in a breath when he licked his lips, his tongue close enough that it brushed against your mouth. It would’ve been easy to close the last bit of distance and put you both out of your misery. Still playing the part of a gentleman, the hand on your thigh didn’t move. But his grip tightened a fraction.
Enough to let you know how badly he needed you.
As much as Bucky wanted to, he didn’t kiss you the night the two of you spoke for the first time. He was a gentleman and didn’t rush it, even after you stayed up all night chatting. Now you look forward to each and every kiss.
He could have any girl on campus and he’s desperate for me.
“One,” you agreed, capturing his mouth in a gentle kiss.
Bucky returned it with fervor and you were helpless to do anything but get swept away. His lips molded against yours perfectly and you practically crawled into his lap as he deepened the kiss, studying long forgotten at that point. It was a feat you lasted as long as you did without throwing yourself at him.
This is definitely going to be more than one kiss if we don't stop.
“Back to studying?” you asked breathlessly.
“Only if I get to kiss you again when we’re done,” he smiled.
“Are my kisses that great, Titan?” you asked, running a finger along his sharp jawline.
Maybe you weren't playing fair by using his nickname, which he loved hearing from you, but he started it by suggesting a fake study session just to get a kiss from you and using your nickname first.
Instead of a smug smirk when Bucky pulled back, his cheeks flushed slightly as he regarded you with an easy smile. “If you knew what it was like to kiss you, you’d never wanna stop,” he answered, making your heart thud in your chest as he pulled you closer by the hips.
A knock on the door broke you temporarily from your spell, but you stayed close in Bucky’s lap.
“Hey!” your roommate said through the door. “Are you two decent? I need to grab something real quick.”
Great timing.
“Unfortunately, we are,” you teased, pressing your forehead against Bucky’s as she put her key in the door. "Now we have to study."
“Don't mind me! Not looking!” your roommate announced, rummaging through her closet until she found what she needed. “Use protection! Don’t need you knocking her up!”
Bucky laughed when you groaned, both of you used to her antics. “How about we study in my room next time?” he offered.
“Deal," you agreed, sneaking in one more quick kiss.
Although you had a feeling you wouldn’t get much studying done at his place either, you didn't mind one bit.
Tumblr media
Another couple for me to adore. Love and thanks! ❤️
Masterlist ⚓ Bucky Barnes Masterlist ⚓ KoFi
1K notes · View notes
hqmillioncorn · 7 months
Text
Tumblr media
FFXIVWrite Day twenty-three: Suit
with @windupnamazu 's Butter
“Stupid!” Babycorn kicked at the bed. “I’m so stupid!!”  Where had her powers been when she needed them?! Floating in the air? changing someone’s fate? Casting powerful spells? They had all turned out to be useless in protecting Cherrypit. And now that he was gone she couldn’t even use her powers safely! It was either him or her, and to make that decision would probably literally end up killing her.  “How could I be so stupid…”  Babycorn dropped to her knees around the shards of glass that was once a mirror. 
“Are you ready to go Bebe?” 
Tilika’s voice echoed from the outside. Inside of her room Babycorn quickly shut the small passageway she had been using to look at the world Chelinka and Yuri had remade together. “Almost ready!” Babycorn yelled back. It wasn’t entirely a lie. She was all dressed up with shoes on and only missing one thing until she was ready to go out. 
Now that she had fully accepted her identity as just another Chelinka out in the numerous worlds out there Babycorn knew what ‘she’ and her brother had done. Completely remaking the universe sounds like something that she would get super grounded for doing. 
“They all looked so happy…” She was a little jealous. Chelinka had her brother and both her parents. Babycorn only had her brother, and thanks to her stupid mistakes there was a chance she would never see him again. She would never get to tell him how much she loved him, or how sorry she was. 
Babycorn knew Cherrypit was going to be fine. Eventually he would wake up again. Everyone told her so but there was always that nagging thought that maybe she could do something about it.
She wasn’t supposed to use her Starsinger powers too much or else there would be dire consequences to it. The exact consequences were unknown to her and pretty much everyone else. Though one of those had been getting herself into a trance-like state where she looked awake but really wasn’t. 
Tilika had also said her eyes had glowed an eerie golden color the whole time. 
That sounded horrible. It only made her hate her eyes that much more. 
Babycorn sighed and picked out a hat from a pile. It was a large white sun hat, she often wore it during fishing trips all so she could pull the brim over her eyes and cover them so she wouldn't be able to see any fish. “If it works for that…” Then the hat would work to cover her eyes too. 
At least, from anyone taller than her it would. 
Which was fine because almost everyone in Old Sharlayan that Tilika talked to was taller than Babycorn anyway. It always made her really small. Doubly so because whatever it was they talked about mostly flew over her head anyway, aside from a word or two. 
“Okay I’m all ready!” Babycorn adjusted the sun hat on her head and just before she left to join Tilika outside, she happened to catch a glimpse of herself in her mirror. She hadn’t turned it around today. Her ugly yellow eyes stared right back at her, they were dripping with disappointment. 
Babycorn walked closer to the mirror and turned it away. 
That was enough of that. 
Tumblr media
Yesterday Tilika had asked Babycorn if she had wanted to accompany her to the Studium tomorrow. Which was today. Tilika had to run some of her studies on Starsingers with one of the professors there and had thought that Babycorn might have wanted to do something else besides running cooking experiments in the kitchen with Cherrypit’s dolls. 
She was delighted when Babycorn said yes but now she was wondering if it had been too soon in taking her outside.
Tilika looked up, today was a very cloudy day. There wasn’t really a reason for anyone to wear a sun hat in this kind of weather. Which Tilika would never say outright but when she considered Babycorn’s earlier behavior it did bring some cause for concern.
“Babycorn?” Tilika waited for Babycorn to look up at her until she continued but she never did. “Are you feeling okay? Do you want to go back home and wait for me there?” 
Tilika knew that some days were worse than others for Babycorn. Sometimes there would be days where she wouldn’t care less about them, going outside and talking to all the gleamers that passed by their house everyday. Then other days Tilika would struggle to even get Babycorn to look at her. 
Today was looking to be more of the latter. 
“I’m okay.” Babycorn kept looking down at the ground. Her free hand tugged on her sling, something Tilika noticed that she did when she was nervous nowadays. “I think I’m just a little hungry.” 
“Ooooh. I see!” 
Tilika had already told Babycorn that she shouldn’t be ashamed of her eyes but it was much easier said than done. 
She knew that to Babycorn the color of her eyes represented much more than just being ‘alive’ again. It meant that in her eyes she had failed in protecting Cherrypit, she had let him get hurt and in turn had broken the promise she made to him and her parents so many years ago.
No amount of tasty snacks that Tilika gave Babycorn could ever fully solve her younger cousin's dilemmas.
“Hey I have an idea.” Tilika stopped walking and though they were just a few more minutes from reaching the Studium, she turned and began to lead Babycorn down another path. “Why don’t we go get something to eat first? I hear the Last Stand has some new food on the menu we can try!” 
“Like what?”
‘Wow she’s really in a funk…’ Normally Babycorn wouldn’t care less about the specifics of food. Tilika always got a ‘leap before you look’ sorta vibe from her. “Well…Um…?” Truth was that she had no idea if the Last Stand did have any new food, that little lie was supposed to get Babycorn excited to try new food. “I’m not too sure! But we can go eat one of those tasty burgers you liked so much!” 
“Oh. Okay.” 
Tilika mouthed a silent ‘Yes!’ to herself. While whatever problems Babycorn had with herself couldn’t be solved with a tasty snack or a burger, it certainly could help her feel a little better. Even if it was just for today. 
Tumblr media
The Last Stand was as busy as ever, maybe even more so given that it was currently the morning rush. Though the line was just a little longer than usual, neither Tilika or Babycorn had any problem with waiting and it wasn’t like they were in a rush or anything. 
Having made their orders, both cousins took their seats and waited until their burgers were delivered to them.
Tilika watched as person by person kept walking up to them to thank them for helping to save the world. Babycorn would mumble a quiet “You’re welcome.” and then try to cover her face with her sun hat. Then Tilika would take control of the conversation, asking whoever had walked up to them how they were doing and to have a nice day. 
Just as Tilika thought another person was walking up to them to try and talk to Babycorn, someone caught her eye. It wasn’t just another stranger walking up to them, it was also someone coming to bring them their burgers.
“Good morning Tilika! Babycorn! I got your burgers! I hope you like them!”
Babycorn knew that voice from anywhere. Her head jerked up and she found herself staring at her good friend Butter. Who she had forgotten entirely was visiting Old Sharlayan for the time being. “Butts?!” What was he doing here???? Specifically?!
Butter smiled as he dropped the bag he was holding into Tilika’s hands. “I’m just helping out here a little!” He could have sworn that he told Babycorn about this already but maybe he had told her while she had been asleep in bed. “I kinda just needed something to do and..Well-this is just where I landed!” 
“Oh…” 
That’s when Babycorn realized something. 
Butter was shorter than her. 
Without so much as a warning, Babycorn jumped out of her seat and took off running, pulling her hat down as she ran. “Bebe?!” Tilika jumped up to run after her but was surprised at just how quickly Babycorn had run off, there was no sign of her anywhere. “Damn it…” Tilika whispered to herself.
Tilika decided to do what she did best and ask people around if they had seen where Babycorn had run off to, trying to gather enough clues to deduce in which direction she had run off in and where she could have gone. 
She failed to notice that Butter had also run off, just as fast as Babycorn.
Tumblr media
“Excuse me!!” 
Butter maneuvered his way around another person that had been walking the opposite way he had been running. Being small was something that really got on his nerves sometimes but it did have its advantages. Like making it easier to run past a large group of people. 
Eventually he had followed Babycorn all the way to the edge of the water. 
Babycorn was sitting behind a large crate just out of view. She was resting her head on her knees, quietly crying to herself. 
Butter walked closer to her and stopped just short of reaching her. There was no plan for what to do next, but he couldn’t stand by and watch Babycorn be sad. If anything, Butter didn’t want to leave her to cry all by herself.
Butter carefully took a seat a little bit next to her, not too close and not too far. “Is everything okay?” Well duh! No it’s not! Why are you asking thaT?! “I-I’m sorry if I did anything it’s-!!”
“It’s my eyes…” Babycorn pulled down the brim of her hat even further, stretching it further than she ever had. The thought of ripping her hat never even crossed her mind. “They’re ugly. I hate them.” What else was she supposed to say? That was the basic gist of it, and yet despite that Babycorn kept talking.
“They just-remind me of how I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t save Cherry…”
At some point Butter must have seen her eyes at their worst, when she had been bedridden for who knows how long. Tilika told her all about how her little boy friend would come and bring gifts to her and leave in a hurry. That couldn’t have been anyone but Butter. “I’m sorry you had to see my stupid eyes Butts.” Her hideous eyes that were good for nothing but telling people that she was a failure. 
Butter gently placed his hand on her’s, once he did Babycorn’s grip on her hat slightly loosened as she turned her head just a little to look at him. 
“Um, I think they’re pretty.” 
“HeEh?!” 
That comment had caught Babycorn so off-guard that her heart started beating just a little too fast. 
Babycorn had wanted to say something like, ‘What are you talking about?!’ or ‘You’re crazy!!’ but for some reason she found herself so flustered that she found herself incapable of saying anything besides, “P-Pretty?!” 
Honestly Butter was crazy, but crazy in another sense. And for a certain person sitting right next to him.
“U-Um…! Yeah!” 
Babycorn didn’t know what to think. “Eve-Even if I let everyone down? I…I couldn’t do anything to help Cherry. Everything I could do…! I couldn’t do it! I couldn’t do anything…!” There must have been something different she could have done. Anything.
“I think…You didn’t let anyone down. Especially not Cherry.” 
Babycorn didn’t know what to think. “I…didn’t?” That couldn’t possibly be right. 
“I don’t think anyone could have done what you did any better than how you did it.” Butter leaned back and looked up at the cloudy sky above them. Having grown up the way he did, Butter understood what Babycorn was going through more than the usual person did, maybe even more. “If I had to do what you did with Pancake…I probably would have done the same things as you.”
Babycorn sniffled, “...What do you mean?”
“There’s not really a guide for kids like us to learn how to protect our younger siblings all by ourselves. I know you did your best, we both did the best we could!”
“You protected Pancake…” 
“With a bunch of help!” Cinnamon had been a big help and even then Butter wouldn’t have traded raising Pancake for anything in the world. “Then I met all of you and things just got even better!”
Babycorn couldn’t help but think back to just how mean she used to be to everyone back then. It made her feel a little bad that Butter was calling meeting her a good thing, when she was nothing but trouble. 
“Um…” Butter looked around nervously, “What I’m trying to say is um, I think you did the best you could and what happened wasn’t your fault. I’m sure of it!” 
Babycorn let her hat go, her eyes were wide and she turned to look right at Butter. 
“I-It wasn’t…?” She had already been told this countless times. There was something to be said however, to hear this from someone who knew just how hard it was to go through the same thing as you. Almost as if it was an almost perfect reflection of their experiences. Though Babycorn would never wish for Butter to understand her experiences completely. 
“It wasn’t!” Butter repeated. He still wasn’t quite sure what had happened to Cherrypit but he was still sure of his stance. No matter what. It wouldn’t be until after he left Old Sharlayan that Lunya would tell him what exactly happened. Then he would find himself weirdly disappointed when he learned that Zenos had already been killed. 
“Huh.” Babycorn slumped down, “That’s weird…” She touched one of her eyes with her hands and looked down at it.
“Hmm?” 
“I kinda feel a little better?” Not completely but a start was a start, for today.
“Oh! I’m glad!” Butter was happy he could help. Even just a little. 
The two decided to sit there and watch the ocean waves for a little while. Until Babycorn spoke up again. “So, um…?” Babycorn tapped her fingers together, “You said my eyes looked pretty…?” 
At that moment Butter realized exactly what he was doing. His face blushed a deep red. “D-Did I say that?! When did I say that?! I-I mean they are pretty but-but I mean I-?! Um…!!!!” What had gotten into him?! 
“Do my eyes look like something?!” Whenever Babycorn was able to hear Airy reading one of those cheesy B’ig romance novels to herself she would often hear lines about how someone’s eyes reminded them of the ocean or of a grassy hill or whatever. She couldn’t quite remember. 
“T-They…Look like eeeeyes…?” 
HE WAS BLOWING IT. 
“Wow! Thanks Butts!” Babycorn accepted the compliment nonetheless. Very much like a normal person would. 
Butter, an equally very normal person, found that he couldn’t quite keep his mouth shut. “I guess…They sort of remind me of the sun.” He could still remember the first time he had seen Babycorn’s eyes. It was almost like he had been blinded like the sun itself, but not in a bad way.
“...You’re not supposed to look into the sun!” Babycorn reminded him. She had learned that lesson the hard way many years ago and kept re-remembering it until it finally stuck just last year. 
“I-I mean like-sunlight?” Butter didn’t quite know how to explain it. “The way it sorta…shines down on everything in a really warm light. The little sun rays that peek through the window sometimes and if you put your hand in them they feel nice. And like the way the sun sometimes breaks through the clouds on a really cold day and you can feel it almost hugging you. Helping you to be warm. Sorta like that.”
Babycorn was feeling really dizzy.
“They suit you!”
Tumblr media
Tilika, who had eventually tracked Babycorn down, had watched the whole exchange from a distance. 
She munched down on her burger, tears on her face. “They’re so cute… What the heck?” Tilika was resisting every urge in her body that was telling her to run up to Babycorn and hug her and tease her about how she just needed a cute boy to make her feel better. 
“Ugh! Tell me about it.” Lunya agreed.
“WHATTAHECK?!”
9 notes · View notes
honeyabyss · 3 years
Text
Phone calls after Mc returned to the human realm
Lucifer:
this man is stubborn, calling you would be like admitting he's gone soft and his pride does not allow that!
so he refuses to call for the first few weeks, keeping himself busy with work of which he has enough anyway
due to all his student council work, a few other tasks of Diavolo and on top of that the usual shenanigans of his brothers, he quickly becomes very stressed
he's at his breaking point and needs someone to talk to so he can release some of his stress before he takes it out on someone else
so he goes to your old room and starts talking as soon as he enters it, only to stop confused when he doesn't see you in the room, remembering only now you left for the human realm
disappointed he sits down onto the bed and curls the blanket around himself
"Their scent is almost gone...Soon it'll be as if they were never here"
he closes his eyes, sighs softly and makes his decision
"Mc? I hope I didn't wake you. I simply thought a conversation would be nice, it's been a while..."
Lucifer's call is pretty casual, he talks about his day, work and his troublemaker brothers, it almost feels like any other day before just this time it is over phone
he does not want to admit he misses you, a) because he'd seem weak and b) he fears what admitting it will do to him, he might just miss you even more
BUT while saying goodbye he accidentally lets a "I miss you" slip, his breathing stops shortly realizing his mistake, he is about to apologize when you say it back
he smiles softly, genuinely relieved about your shared sentiment and whispers "I'll call you again soon then" before hanging up
from then on he calls you every evening and you better jump right away and pick up at the first ringing, because this man is lonely without you
Mammon:
"Congratulations! You're one of our lucky winners of our monthly Devil-Lottery. We'll have to confirm your bank account number with the one given to us when you agreed to participating in the lottery. Would you be so kind to slowly repeat the number-"
this greedy demon will quite literally try to scam you, only to absolutely panic when you hang up on him
he will instantly call you back, constantly adjusting his glasses, a nervous habit he acquired over the years
"H-hey...Mc...uhm, it's me your favourite demon!"
he is relieved you picked up, as it means you didn't block him right away, he stumbles over his words trying to find an excuse why he just tried to scam you
"Ah you know I only did that to test you, you've passed nobody scams my human! You're my amazing human after all! That's why I love you...u-uh I-i mean...nothing...that was a static you must have misheard..."
when you tell him you knew it was him as you recognized his voice, he'll be outraged, screaming into his D.D.D (and probably later getting punched by Lucifer for being so loud)
"What do you mean you already knew?! You dared to hang up on The Great Mammon?
He gets a bit sulky by your reaction, so how about playing into his obvious lie of testing you to make him feel better again
besides trying to scam you Mammon also called to (not so sneakily) check on your wellbeing
now that you're gone he constantly worries about you and he can't do much to help, but if you were actually in need of help due to whatever, trust me he'd fight Lucifer himself for permission to go to you
he'll call you as often as he can, sometimes with a few days of a break in between, asking you about your life and also letting you in on his upcoming money making schemes...please don't tell Lucifer about them
Mammon has learned his lesson though, he'll never try to scam you again, he couldn't bare it if you were to block or ignore his calls
Leviathan:
phone calls? Why? You two can just talk about the in-game talk function of this new online game you play, but no real world talk while playing that ruins the immersion!
Levi will rarely call you as he just doesn't feel comfortable enough to talk with you about normie stuff for too long
he normally just spam writes you, ding, ding, ding, one message after another coming in without you being able to respond quick enough
so if gets too much and you decide to just call him so you can have an actual chance of responding, Levi just panics and almost drops his D.D.D
"Mc? D-did you accidentally hit the c-call button? N-no? I-i see no I love you too!!....AAAAAAAh I-i meant I l-l-love t-talking to you too...hehehe w-why would a yucky o-otaku like me say something like that"
poor boy is so nervous he'll say something stupid and will stutter a lot the first few times you call him, he is just not used to talking on the phone
he will laugh nervously over everything and sometimes there'll be a phase of awkward silence, but please don't point it out, Levi is already stressed enough as it is
once he gets used to calls, he'll surprisingly suggests to have a phone call while both of you are watching the new episode of an anime, so he'll be able to talk to you as if you're right next to him, which works out mediocre at first, you have to tell him to be a bit quieter a few times but besides that it's quiet nice
"Ooooooowhooooooah!!! Did you see that? That was amazing, I wish I had these superpowers, I'd save you of every danger like a real hero! W-what do you mean I'm already your hero?"
Yes, you saw and heard it, and your neighbours probably heard Levi...
on the rare occasions Levi calls you he'll often asks you for favours like to buy him this exclusively in the human realm sold limited edition game, of course he isn't like his scummy brother Mammon who'll constantly asks for things and he'll also make it up by sending you stuff you can only get on Akuzon
so calls don't happen very often, but neither if you really mind, you'll still be in contact through messages and games
Satan:
Satan will be very proper about calling you, he'll check through messages if you're fine with him calling you, so he can be sure you have time and he doesn't bother you
Satan never jumps into a conversation right away (unless he is angry), he makes sure to show interest in you and hold a bit small talk, asking about your day, how you're doing and so on
you talk about many different things with him mostly about your shared interests, but Satan is willing to listen to you ramble about hobbies he doesn't have as well
one thing you two quickly come to do was have book club sessions over phone
"I wish you were still here Mc. I miss my book discussion partner, nobody here has as interesting opinions and views as you..."
back in Devildom you two would both read a book and afterwards discuss your thoughts, and you found a way too keep doing just that
you both write about books, decide on one to read for the week and would than have a phone call where you just talk for hours about the piece of literature you've read
now that you're back in the human realm, the book choices are even bigger as you can read human books as well, you just have to send a copy to Satan, sometimes Barbatos will be nice and pick a book up and deliver it to Satan, or to you if it's the other way around with a demon book
"Oh? No, you're right. I haven't thought about it like that yet...your thoughts are so fascinating!"
Satan will shower you in praise for every little detail that you noticed yet he missed. he genuinely enjoys your phone calls, and though he wouldn't admit it, sometimes he anticipates your call more than the actual book
even though there now is a bigger distance between you two he still feels as close to you as before, not much has changed for him and he knows he'll be able to see you again soon, he'll just have to be patient
"Next week, same time? I'm looking forward to talking to you again. Take care until then!"
Asmodeus:
"Oh my Lord! You won't believe what just happened!!!"
no greeting or alike, just straight into the discussion
whenever something gossip worthy happens, Asmo is already dialling your number to spill the tea and keep you updated on any Devildom related gossip, even if it won't help you much, it's a nice thought of him keep you in the loop
those are only the spontaneous call though, obviously you can't take these all the time...you still have a life of your own...
you two actually call each other every day at the same time, plus/minus a couple minutes, the water in the tub has to be filled first...yeah Asmo likes to talk you while he is taking his afternoon bath
"Hahh it's so relaxing, warm water caressing my beautiful skin, and the bath bomb today smells so good! I wish you could smell it, or even better I wish we could bathe together!"
*water sloshing noises intensified*
Asmo...no....yes...maybe...just stop, you'll fluster Mc!
"No really! I miss having you here, I'll pamper you all day the next time I'll get to see you. You must already be starved of my beauty, but don't worry my dear, I'm just as starved of seeing your lovely face!"
what to talk about while he is bathing? Anything really if it's about your day, any complains or whatever, just expect a few innuendos of him...that's nothing new though
seriously though Asmo is the guy to talk to about any of your problems, he will listen and try to come up with a solution for you, even if he seems a bit narcissistic sometimes he really cares about you, so use your phone calls as therapy from time to time
"Oh darling, don't worry it'll be okay! I'm here to help...now tell me every detail so I can come up with a plan! I'll always be there for you, no matter what!"
Beelzebub:
"*munch munch* This one is really good! Mc you should try some...oh"
now that you're back in the human realm, Beels snack times are very lonely, he has just gotten so used to your presence, even sharing his food is normal by now
and let's be honest Beels snack time is 24/7 so he misses you a lot
he feels the urge to call you every five minutes and sometimes even forgets to eat while phone is ringing and he is waiting for you to pick up
but you can't constantly talk with him over phone so the calls often end up on your voicemail where Beel tells you about all the different kind of foods he ate that day
when Belphie catches wind of his twin constantly pestering you, he hides Beels D.D.D so he can't call you all the time
when you're actually able to pick up on his call, Beel will be so happy you can quite literally hear his huge grin while he's excitedly talking about his current snack
"Have you ever tried spicy bat-wings? There opened a new restaurant in town and it's really good!! Next time you're here I'll invite you there. Oh but what if it closes before you're back...ah you'll just have to visit soon!"
though Beel is often disappointed when you don't pick up, he would never hold it against you, he knows he calls quite a lot, but he just misses you and tipping a message while he eats is harder than putting his D.D.D on speaker and talking to you
of course he doesn't only talk about food, he also tells you about how his brothers are doing and how his workout was, or what things he has planned to do at the weekend, all in all Beel is just super happy to share everything of his life with you
on rare occasions he'll call you and be untypically quiet, that happens when he had a fight with his twin, it's not often but sometimes it happens and his first instinct is to call you, because he feels like he can tell you everything so he is very comfortable and trusting with you
"I miss you a lot, you know...but I also know that you think about me daily, every time your stomach rumbles you'll be reminded of me and that makes me happy, I also think about you every time I'm hungry! Hm? But I'm always hungry? That's right! You're always on my mind!"
Belphegor:
Listen, his sleeping schedule is very tight, you can't just expect him to call you!
he will call you so rarely and if you call him it might just happen that he is sleeping and has phone on silent...or he's just to lazy to walk to his phone, or he is just not in the mood to talk... he takes any excuse to not be on the phone
Belphie does like talking to you, but he is not the greatest at long conversations so he like messages more
sometimes when he can't seem to fall asleep, he will be the one to call you...in the middle of the night...and you better pick up or he gets annoyed
"What took you so long? I thought you wanted to talk more often and then you leave me hanging for a whole minute? Doesn't matter I would have waited longer with you...."
he is mostly silent through a phone call, his main reason to call you is because he like to listen to you talk, it's calming to him and if he calmer then he might be able to fall asleep again
so don't expect an amazingly deep conversation...
"Mhmmm...hm? Yeah I'm still there. I'm listening keep talking, I love your voice..."
he'll bring up a topic from time to time so you have an inspiration about what to talk about, but most of the times he just lazily hum or making acknowledging noises so you know he is still listening
"Zzz..."
he will to 100% fall asleep while being on the phone with you, that doesn't mean you're boring, but that he trusts you so much that he is comfortable enough to let his guard down
Diavolo:
"Good afternoon! How was the week of my favourite human?...ah don't tell Solomon I said that hahaha"
as the future king of hell, he is a busy man, but he still manages to give you a call once a week, to the same time you two would have normally had your weekly afternoon tea meeting in the castle
with the exchange year over there is not much about your classes to talk about left, but Dia is just as excited about any other topic you decide to talk about, be it the most mundane thing he loves it!
"Oh so you went grocery shopping? That must be fun! Barbatos does it all the time, though I suppose you buy less things...I'd like to see a human market at some point, I wonder if they're very different from ours...oh but I wouldn't really able to tell I suppose, Barbatos and you would need to point out the differences!"
this man can talk without taking a break for hours...you think Asmo is bad? Prepare for Diavolo...
but seriously it never gets boring with him, because he somehow finds good and fun stuff in every activity, I swear give him a vacuum and watch him clean you're whole flat with the enthusiasm of a child getting presents on Christmas
the work of a future king consists of so much paperwork, Dia will have only few events of his week to tell you about, if there is something to talk about there is a high chance it has to do with the brothers
so he'd much rather just sip his tea and listen to you, he'll ask you loads of questions though about anything he doesn't know
sometimes you two forget the time and Barb sadly has to remind you to come to a stop for now
"Mc? Did I wake you? If so I'm terribly sorry...would you be up to talk for a little bit more? I'm not feeling too tired yet"
surprise night time calls from Dia where you'll have to speak silently or Barbatos might reprimand Diavolo for staying up all night and being tired the next day, Dia doesn't regret it ever though, he likes to talk you a lot!
Barbatos:
Barbatos is always busy and his schedule can often suddenly change with a new whim of his master, so he can't exactly have a scheduled call with you
so you might not get to hear of him very often
BUT he made it a habit to call you when he is on duty to do the dishes, the chore is somewhat boring to him with no one to distract him
so he calls you and if you pick up, he'll put you on speaker and talk to you about whatever comes to mind while his hands wash one after another of the expensive porcelain of the royal household
"I've bought this new tea which is said to be really nice, it can even be enjoyed cold apparently. It seems to have to just the right amount of sweetness to not get bitter when drank cold...you can still add sugar for extra sweetness, though I believe you're already sweet enough as it is"
no matter what you decide to talk about Barbatos always has at least some knowledge about it, so it's beneficial for both of you, he can tell you the things he knows and you tell him your stuff
"I hope I'm not bothering you too much? There is quite a lot to do today... so it might take some more time..."
you will never get to know that Barb has actually already finished the dished a few minutes ago, but just isn't ready to say goodbye yet
the rest of the employees will be able handle the castle for a bit longer without him, meanwhile he can take a well deserved tea break and listen to you
he very much enjoys the fact he found a way to have some time with you while theoretically having to be at work, as long as he is able to finish all the tasks of his daily schedule, he doesn't feel too bad about his not so legal break
"I fear I'll have to get back to work now, but I loved talking to you today! I hope you enjoyed it as well. I'll talk to you again soon!"
Solomon:
Though Solomon returned to the human realm with you, you haven't heard much of him, being a wise old man sorcerer must be very time consuming
so calls of Solomon might be rare but that doesn't mean you don't write messages every now and then, when he calls you though it's always about something interesting or important to share, he talks about those things rather verbally, the best option for him would be in person, but that doesn't always work so a phone call is the second best option
"My lovely apprentice, how is your studying going? I've found the tome we were talking about last time you were interested in...it took some research to find which sorcerer had it but I brought it back for you. How about I'll drop by you next week? I can help you with your studying then, the tome is written in an older version of the language it might be easier if we do it together!"
Solomon can simply not sit still, so while you're on the phone, he is always tinkering at something and the background noises are sometimes quite peculiar...
Was that a pig squeaking? Are you sure you should be brewing a potion while being on the phone? Isn't it distracting?
Oh Lord was that an explosion?!
"Hmm? Oh yeah...I`m cooking dinner right now! It was just a small explosion though, you know the ones that are regularly happen in the kitchen. Why? Was my cute student worried about me?~ heheh alright, alright, I'll stop teasing you...for now!"
no matter how chaotic, teasing or busy Solomon is though, if you call him and are in need of help, he'll drop everything and run to you
he knows how hard it can be when studying magic, not to mention that the studies are difficult, the constant hiding of any magic in front of other humans is also very nerve wrecking, sometimes you feel like giving up and going back to your normal life, back to your non-magical very human friends that are blissfully unaware of everything happening around them, but you know you could never forget and act as if nothing happened, you'd also miss your new not so normal friends, so when times get hard Solomon will rush to you and comfort you in person or at least calm you down on phone until he is able to go to you
if that happens he is more likely to call you every two to three days just to check in on you
"Hey how is my strong and beautiful fellow human doing? Feeling better yet? Need a shoulder to lean on? I'm at your flat in 10 minutes..."
Simeon:
Simeon is a daily caller as well, he's gotten so used to seeing you every day that he feels quite restless if he doesn't get to hear your voice at least once a day
he asked you to recommend at what time he should call, he doesn't want to restrict you in your daily life, so you both came to the conclusion after dinner would be perfect, as both of you are free for the rest of the day then
He will often write a bit on his TSL scripts, just some notes and inspirations he comes up while talking to you
"How was your day my little lamb? You haven't overworked yourself right? Tell me if you ever need help!"
though Simeon would definitely have things to complain about with how Michael is working him to the bone, he'd rather not worry you so instead he tells you about how Luke is doing and evasively answers you questions about himself
"Oh me? Ah yes, I'm doing fine, just doing the usual archangel stuff you know...Ah please do not worry Mc, my dear! Nothing dangerous!"
over the time his TSL notes turn into random scribbles, rhymes and poems and every now and then something that looks suspiciously like your name
Sometimes Luke crashes the call and wants to speak with you as well so Simeon tries to put the phone on speaker only to end up ending the call and Luke getting frustrated with Simeon and doing it himself
then again Simeon also just accidentally hangs up on you mid conversation, because his fingers hit the button without him noticing, he'll get so confused when you cut off in the middle of your sentence and thinks something has happened to you, only to be relieved when you call back a few seconds later
Simeon is very interested in your day and how you doing, asking you many questions and encouraging you to keep talking
"Oh no please keep talking! You're not overwhelming me at all, in fact I like listening to your voice, it puts even the most melodic voice of an angel into the shadows...hahaha did I make you embarrassed? I apologize, I didn't mean to, I was only telling you my honest opinion!"
Simeon is quite the flatterer, but he often does not notice it, he simply tries to be nice, so a call with him leaves you flustered and stuttering ever now and then, but he is just as quick to blush at a honest and heartfelt compliment
Luke:
Luke might be an angel, but he is still low ranking and therefore has less assignments, besides studying to become a great angel and doing some minor tasks for Michael, he is relatively free
he often spends his free time in the kitchen constantly trying to improve his baking, now after the exchange year not only to impress Michael and Simeon but also Barbatos, maybe a bit Beel and definitely you!
but as Simeon is still working at these times, he gets somewhat lonely so he'll try calling you to keep him some company
Luke has this habit of speaking the recipes out loud to remember the steps better and be able to able to make them from memory, he got that tip from Barbatos, but he still has his moments where he gets stuck and forgets what to do next, you can notice that when he gets silent and concentrates on trying to remember
"Ah right that was it! I almost forgot about the eggs! Good thing you were here...or well on the phone hehe! You always remember this stuff, you're so amazing!"
when you tell him you simply looked it up in the internet for him, he'll get a bit sulky that he now basically cheated, but with your reassurance that he is already great and can remember so many other steps, he is quickly back to his happy little angel self
"Michael let me help with his conference today I was assistant record keeper today, one day I'll be able to do it alone, bit they're talking so much and so fast...I think I still need a couple centuries until I'm fully ready, but I'm working on improving! You should also try to improve your skills daily! Even a small bit of practice is good! Though I think you're perfect already!"
Luke most definitely learned his flattering from Simeon... he talks about many different things on the phone but repeating topic is Michael...just talking to you makes his day and later he'll tell everything Simeon and he smiles so brightly while he reports to him, please keep talking to him a lot!
936 notes · View notes
Tumblr media
pairings: Lucifer x Fem!Reader, Mammon x Fem!Reader, Leviathan x Fem!Reader
warnings: tw abandonment (but it turns out okay, I promise), mentions of the act of birthing,
A/N: you came to the right place! as the second oldest of six children, I have some experience when it comes to pregnancy:) I hope you don't mind, nonny, but I'm gonna split this up into a few parts so I can do the dateables as well!
Tumblr media
Lucifer
The moment you had shyly produced the positive pregnancy test from the pocket of your hoodie, it felt like Lucifer had entered into a fever dream filled with nursery designs, baby names, the expenses that pile up before the baby even arrives, researching human pregnancy, keeping you out of harm's way and healthy and happy...
So when you first stagger out of bed and rush to his bathroom, hand clamped over your mouth and one shaky hand on your slightly swollen tummy, Lucifer isn't surprised
He is very concerned, however. You had been so nervous to tell him of your pregnancy, you waited until the last moment before your bump was noticeable to tell him
That meant you had been suffering from all of these pregnancy side effects before he'd permanently moved you to sleep in his room
Lucifer hoists himself out of bed and pads into the bathroom, gathering up your hair, if any, into his fist and pulling your hunched form between his legs for support
You hate this feeling with a passion; throbbing stomach and a lump in your throat with little to no vertigo and tears rolling down your face as you try and catch your breath
You tell him it hurts, you ask him if he can take the pain away as your head rests on his chest, lashes fluttering with wooziness
Lightheadedness was unbearably common; you would suddenly grip his sleeve and he could watch the color drain from your face and your knees get shaky, body beginning to sway
He always catches you though, finding a place for you to sit or lie down and gather yourself
Tummy rubs become more common; the feeling of his hands against your bare tummy, spreading their warmth and nullifying the ache, allowing you to relax
He's extremely attentive as well and can tell whenever you need something
Water? Here's a cup sweetheart, remember, you're hydrating and eating for two people!
Craving something? Chocolate? Fried pickles? Chips of some kind? sweets? He's stockpiled anything you could want and locked it away just for you.
I feel like Lucifer would want your baby to be a little girl. A little princess he can carry on his shoulders and spoil with his love and gifts.
Satan ruined him for having another baby boy, but if that's how the cards fall, he certainly wouldn't mind. Unfortunately, he'd be constantly walking on eggshells, afraid he'll make your little boy into another rebellious child
That's the last thing he wants
Lucifer does his best to keep his kid away from Satan and Belphie and out of the 'Formerly Anti-Lucifer League', but sometimes you're taking a nap or out shopping with Asmodeus, and Satan and his brothers manage to coerce the little one into their shenanigans
One thing is for sure though, even if Lucifer didn't want any kids and the creation of one was unplanned, he would never ever turn you away
He's very responsible and does anything in his power to make the pregnancy as easy and happy as possible
On the day you are to give birth, he's a mess
He has already sweat through 3 shirts by the time the IV has been secured to your hand
Everything he says doesn't come without a stutter
He's squeezing your hand and kissing your hair during labor, trying to distract you from the burn between your legs as much as he can
You probably need extra stitches from baby's horns ngl
Definitely cries before the baby is even put in your arms
Refuses to let his brothers come and see you, "They can wait until we go home."
Lucifer is Smitten™
He smooches the tiredness under your eyes and tells you to get some rest
Surprisingly, he enjoys a lot of the names from the human world you discuss and will most likely pick one of those
But if it's a girl, her name is Lilith. I'm sorry MC, your input is invalid at this time
You don't regret 'final day in the devildom sex' at all when you get to witness the Avatar of Pride reduced to tears when the nurse puts the child in his arms
P-P-Pregnant? MC, ya better be jokin'...
Tumblr media
Mammon
You weren't, judging by the pregnancy test(s) clutched in your fist
He's not mad at you, he's not upset, (in fact, he's the happiest he's ever been), he just scared
Broken Condom Victim™
He loved you just a bit too hard last week...
but let's be real here, HIS MC, carrying HIS baby?
That's like the highest level of ownership on his lovely human you could get! Levi, Asmo, Beel, Lucifer, everyone would be SOOOO JEALOUS!!!
AND
He gets to have a little one running around again!
You saw how sweet he was to babified Satan in the obey me anime premier! He LOVES little kids and nothing would make him happier than someone to play with (besides MC of course) that wouldn't make fun of him for messing up and being silly!
AND
You're so pretty!!
I mean, ya were always pretty, but somethin' about ya is different and yer even more beautiful than before somehow!
Mammon said, his entire face the shade of a pomegranate
Pregnancy glow is REAL
Asmo agrees, after stealing you away from an extremely overprotective mammon and hiding in the attic to chat without disturbance (mammon)
But as much as YOU know he would be the BEST father, comments from his brothers continue to drag him down and the evenings he cried into your shoulder became more and more frequent as your pregnancy progresses
Mammon, as we all know, is, in fact, a tiddy man
He likes to touch and squeeze them, and just gently hold them while cuddling or even browsing in a store, he'd just come up behind you and touch your boobs
(also, mammon likes all sizes, so if you have next to no tiddy like me, you'll be at his mercy as well. those with the large honkers, however, watch yourself)
Now that there's a miracle growing in your tummy, other parts of your body are preparing for its arrival, including your chest
Swelling, swelling, soreness, growing and darkening of the nipples, and swelling make it so Mammon can no longer touch your pretty tiddies :(((
(grammarly didn't like that word)
On the day mammon snack size was to be born, mammon is silent but extremely fidgety
It was early in the morning when you'd shaken him awake like, "mammoney, I'm going into labor" and he was out of bed and out the door with your luggage before you finished blinking
After grabbing your DDD's and you, he carries you down to the car (what dysfunctional family doesn't have a car? a nice one (Mercedes, Audi, you get the idea) for lucifer and a Volkswagon bus or something for his siblings to share) and drives quickly, but very carefully drives to the hospital, holding your hand the whole way.
He covers your eyes when they put the IV in, just in case you're squeamish, and rubs your arms as the drugs begin to take effect and there's a little fear in your eyes at the thought of pushing an entire human/demon being out of your coochie
He assures you and never lets go of your hand no matter how long you're in labor
When it's all over with and you are resting in your hospital bed waiting for the doctors to finish the Apgar tests and give you your baby
Mammon is speechless as the nurse places the baby in your arms
That's HIS KID!!
Immediately starts crying
The little horns poking out of the blanket? Those look just like his!!
Judging by the bit of hair on it's head, it looks like the baby will have hair like yours
If it's a baby boy, he thinks it should be named "Mammon II" but you just giggle and remind him of the deal he made with lucifer long ago, that his first born child, no matter the gender, had to have 'Lucifer' somewhere in their name
Human names are dumb, except for yours of course, so he searches for suitable demon names
The last thing he wants is a kid named Lucifer, so that will be the kid's middle name
He really regrets his past decisions now
Leviathan
Tumblr media
"Levi?"
"Yeah, babe?"
"I'm pregnant."
*leviathan has been KO'd*
No joke, this man is literally floored and didn't wake up for a while and you were afraid you had just slain the fucking Lord of Shadows
Some Henry you were
You had to call Lucifer in to wake him up because he was still flat on the floor a half and hour later
Mammon is more that happy to tip a bucket of ice water on the face of the son of a bitch that impregnated HIS MC
Levi wakes up and pounces on you, gripping you tightly by the arms
"You're k-kidding r-right?"
Him? A father?
Uhhhhhhh
Unfortunately, Leviathan.exe has stopped working, try again in two thousand years
I hate to say this, but he definitely detaches himself for a while until his brothers, especially Asmodeus, literally beat him into shape
He comes back to you, a little bruised and sobbing, but not from the beating he just received
He's so sorry he neglected you! He's such a horrible demon, undeserving of your welcoming nature
He's gonna be the worst dad, and he's not good enough for you, and his kid will hate him just like everyone else does, he doesn't deserve you, he's so sorry for making you suffer the side effects and feel all alone,
Sir, I-
FALSE
It's your turn to shake some sense into him, reminding him that he would be the. best. dad!!
Not to mention the fact that you were just happy he realized his mistakes and came back to you
He begs you to sleep in his bed tub with him for security, and you have to admit his tail is very comforting
Levi does extensive research on human pregnancy and now at the dinner table, instead of talking about the latest slice of life anime he'd been watching, he's just spouting random pregnancy facts and you're laughing so hard it brings you to tears
When the weird dreams and vivid nightmares happen, Levi is right behind you, rubbing your swollen tummy, and letting you talk about them
A lot of them were about him and about your future child
Most of them were about how they got hurt in some way, either that or YOU got hurt and the baby died
These, more often than not, brought you to tears and stress you out, but Levi is right there, okay? Nothing can hurt you, nor would he let anything happen to you on his watch
Learns how to massage you (safely) to reduce stress
Definitely talks to the baby a lot
Levi begged you to be induced so the birth was safe and not a sudden occasion and you agree
On the day the doctor recommended, you arrived at the hospital and got down to business
Levi didn't really want to be in the room with you, but he knew he had to for your sake and he'd played a few birth simulators from both perspectives and you really needed him
Kinda sits there awkwardly comforting you and encouraging you, holding your hand and caressing your cheeks, a bit flushed from exertion and tears
Listen
If the baby is a boy, his name will be Henry and that's final
If it's a girl, he doesn't really care, as long as you don't name her 'mammonia' or something dumb like that
definitely crashes your hospital bed to snuggle until the baby is ready
cries when the baby wraps its extremely small digits around one of his own
also at the little horns protruding from its head
and the tuft of purple in its head
Also Smitten™
He's so excited to get home and show off his beautiful baby to his brothers and then formulate a plan to raise the kid to live and breathe TSL just like his daddy <3
--
July 9th: VIP MEMBERS, GET YALLS JUICE!!
Countdown Masterlist
Main Masterlist
684 notes · View notes
starlightxsvt · 3 years
Text
3 dates | epilogue
Tumblr media
pairing ➳ badboy!Seungcheol x female!reader
genre ➳ badboy au, romance, some fluff, angst, bad attempt at humour, gets spicy at the end.
word count ➳ 3.5k (total 15.6k)
warnings ➳ cursing, mentions of killing, mentions criminal activities, slight violence(non explicit), smoking, ma man Seungcheol ain't your typical badboy, blackmailing, reader does all sorts of risky things cuz she's a SIMP, blood(nothing explicit), kissing, marking, some breast worshipping, grinding, reader is horny lol. (Please lemme know if I forgot anything.)
a/n : here's the epilogue to 3 dates since tumb1r won't let me post the whole fic in one post :) Enjoy!
Tumblr media
Part 1
As time progresses and days turn into weeks and then into months you are not left with the luxury to cry over Seungcheol. Instead you are bombarded with assignments and projects from your uni and you drown yourself completely in work to forget the scathing pain. Katelyn figured out something is wrong with you and even though talking about that man pains you too much, you told her that you are done with him and you won't be seeing him again in this lifetime. Katelyn did not ask any questions after that as you said you needed time to heal, time to forget even though you have serious doubts he'd ever leave your mind.
You have also applied for an internship to keep you even busier so that when you return home you are too tired to let the thoughts of him plague your mind as you drift off to sleep. And just like that, you have developed a routine, work, eat and sleep, trying your best to allow yourself to not think about him.
Despite that sometimes, some very few times, you think of him, wonder how he's doing, wonder if he's safe. You ponder if he thinks of you, if he regrets his decision but you don't have any answer. You simply hope he does.
-
After another day full of assignments and projects you almost doze off to sleep as soon as you hit your bed until you are intruded by the loud ringing of your phone. Annoyed, you reach for it, wondering who would be calling so late.
The caller ID has your heart doing a backflip, the name you were unable to delete from your heart and your phone flashing on the screen as you instantly sit up in your bed. It's Seungcheol.
Why is he calling so late?
You wait a few seconds, scared to pick up, scared that he might have called accidentally. But before you lose your chance, you inhale deeply and pick the call up. "Hello?" You speak, your voice tentative.The silence from the other end makes your heart fall and your suspicion come true. He called you accidentally and now he will realize it and hang up. You're about to speak again when his voice floats through.
"Hi."
The emotions you feel are overwhelming, undescribable. You're relieved, you're sad, you're excited, you want to cry and scream at the same time. That one word from him has you feeling tingles all over and makes you feel like you just did a hundred laps. Anyhow you manage to speak. "Hey." Your voice almost cracks and tears almost slip past your cheeks. You don't know why you are so emotional. "I just...I just wanted to hear your voice." He sounds so tired...so dejected and your heart breaks. Never in your life did you imagine him to call and say those words to you but instead of feeling happy, a current of melancholy hits you.
Why does he sound so broken?
"Seungcheol? Is...is everything alright?" Your voice is feather like, soft and careful. You hear him sigh loudly and you get your answer. Instead of replying to you, he asks, "How have you been?"
"I'm...fine," you lie. You have been nowhere near fine. He hums noncommittally and you're about to ask him the same question before you realize how dumb it would be. If his voice is any indication he is anything but fine. "____?" He calls your name softly. "Y-yes?" You whisper.
He stays silent, for so long that you think he hung up. "I- I just...can I see you?" He seems to have a hard time gathering his words.
What? You lurch out of bed pushing your covers aside in excitement, trying to prevent a gasp out of your lips. Did you even hear correctly? He wants to see you?
"Wha... what do you mean?" You mumble. You hear him sigh loudly, "I...I am in front of your apartment. Just come down for a minute." You don't need to hear any more words as you are dashing towards your front door in your pajamas, not disconnecting the call. You take the elevator and come out of the building as fast as possible, bumping into things in your way but not giving a care. You feet stops as you stand in front of the entrance to your building, eyes searching wildly for Seungcheol. "Stay there," his voice comes through the phone, just as you spot him standing on the opposite to your building, decently far but not far enough that you can't see.
A horrified gasp leaves your mouth as your eyes finally land on him.
He stands there, bruised, his beautiful face marred with scratches and wounds, his clothes having patches of dirt and if you are seeing correctly his left arm is bleeding as he holds the phone next to his ear with the other.
"Seungcheol-" you're about to rush towards him. "Don't move." He cuts you off, looking you in the eye. Even from afar you don't miss the dark, commanding gaze of him. "Just...just stay there. Just...let me look at you."
No- why is he doing this?
Tears slip down your cheeks, "Seungcheol-" You are interrupted once more, "Please. I- I missed you and...I needed to see you. Just let me hear your voice and look at you like this." His voice almost cracks and you can see the emotion in his eyes.
Your heart breaks.
Why does he keep doing this? Why does he keep pushing you away? Why does he torment himself like this?
You stand there, rooted to the ground, quiet sobs leaving your mouth. He comes here all bruised and wounded and expects you to stay away? How can you when you can clearly see him in pain?
You grip the phone tighter, watching him as he stands there, not moving an inch. His eyes never leaves you as he drinks you in, like this is the last time he's gonna look at you. You can't stand it anymore. Hanging up the phone you run towards him, as fast as your nimble legs can carry you. You can't stay away, you just can't. Not when he looks so hurt and lost and lonely.
Your body smashes against his as you wrap your arms tightly around his torso, your head buried in his chest. He stumbles back from the force and for a while he stays unmoved and you hold your breath, half expecting him to shove you away. But he doesn't. Instead he pulls you firmly against him resting your head on his chest while burying his face in your hair.
The tears come naturally. Loud, ungraceful sobs emerge from you as you cling to him like your life depends on it, your grip on him unyielding. Seungcheol softly pets your hair as your cries fill the silence of the cold night. You pull back just a little to look at his face and you want to once more. There's a cut above his brow and some bruises on his cheek and nose and another cut on his lower lip. But you can't bring yourself to care as you lean above to press your lips against his. You don't dare hold back, kissing him like the world is about to end. Seungcheol reciprocates, tilting your head for better access as his tongue prods into your mouth and you taste the metallic flavour of blood. The kiss is messy, all teeth and tongue, an outpour of the bottled up feelings of the last couple months.
You both take a lungful of air when you pull back and you're about to dive in for more when you realize his arm is injured. "Wha- how did this happen?" You hiccup, wiping away your tears as you gently reach for his bleeding arm. His clothes are torn at the part of the wound and from what you can see, it looks like a knife injury, a thin, slanted cut on his upper arm as if someone slashed him. "It's nothing," he says trying to push your hand away.
"It's not nothing, Seungcheol!" You're yelling before you know it. It's the exasperation, the accumulated frustration over the days that makes you snap.
Seungcheol seems to be shocked at your outburst as he blinks at you, an astonished look on his face. He's kind enough to reply honestly this time. "Got into a fight. I was outnumbered. It's okay, it's nothing serious, I've had worse," his voice is small, almost timid which is definitely unlike him.
Of course he has had worse.
You let out a tired breath. "Come on, you're bleeding. Let me help you." You wrap a hand around his uninjured arm, tugging him towards your apartment.
"No, you don't have to-" he protests but you pin him down with a look. "Please," you speak, your voice low. "I can't let you go like this. Just let me clean your wound." Seungcheol presses his lips into a thin line as if trying to prevent himself from speaking further. When no more words leave his mouth, you drag him into your building in silence.
Entering your unit you help Seungcheol sit down in your small living space as you quickly pad towards the bathroom for the first aid kit. When you return you find him looking around your place with a curious glow in his eyes similar to a child's. As your eyes meet, he sits up straighter and tries to remove his jacket. You aid him in the process, discarding the material on the floor as you take a seat next to him, the first aid kit in your lap.
Thankfully he's wearing a tank top as it gives you easy access to his biceps. You would have stopped to admire and ogle them if he wasn't hurt, which he is and you mentally smack yourself for having such thoughts right now. Seungcheol's eyes does not leave your face as he silently gazes at you and if you didn't know any better you would say he looked at you fondly.
Swallowing, you sanitize your hands before proceeding to clean his wound. Seungcheol tenses beside you, low, pained grunts leaving his lips a few times as you disinfect the cut. But he says nothing, letting you do the work and you don't speak either focused on the task at hand. You then do the same for his face and finish your work by wrapping a bandage around his bicep and sitting back, exhaling a satisfied sigh. Unintentionally your eyes connect to his and you find his scorching gaze on you, those mesmerising eyes almost piercing through your soul. Feeling self aware, you abruptly stand up, coughing to clear your throat. "You should take a shower. I have some extra clothes for my parents when they come over. My dad's clothes should fit you."
"No, it's alright. I should leave." He murmurs. "You're already here. Might as well take a shower. There's no rush," you say sternly, trying to make him agree.
Truth is you want him to stay, at least the night.
Seungcheol sits quietly for a while as if contemplating before surrendering with a sigh. "Okay." "Good. The bathroom's this way," you point towards the attached bath in your room and Seungcheol mutely follows. You offer him a towel and you dad's pajamas, hoping they'd do the job for tonight as he closes the door behind him.
As silence fill the apartment, you quietly return to your bed and sit, anxiously chewing on your lower lip. The digital clock beside your bed reads 2:50 am but your sleep is long gone.
Choi Seungcheol is here. In your house.
Will he spend the night? Or will he be his stubborn self and leave as soon as he is out? And if he does stay, will you see him in morning? Or will he be gone before the sun is up? The thoughts running rampant in your mind gives you a headache as you groan, rubbing your temples. You are sure Seungcheol feels something for you, he has to. Otherwise why would he come to you in the middle of the night? If only he told you his feelings, spilled his heart out to you rather than hiding and pushing you away. He just needs to bare himself to you, tell you what is in his heart. Why can't he do that? Why can't he just give the two of you a chance?
Your thoughts are interrupted as Seungcheol steps out the bathroom, half naked, the pajama pants hanging low on his hips as his muscled body is displayed in all its glory, making your throat dry. He looks at you before quickly looking away as an air awkwardness and tension fills the room. You hold your breath, watching him intently, not moving a single muscle as he tentatively takes a seat at the corner of your bed while wiping his wet hair with the towel hanging around his neck.
You want to tell him to stay the night, the words right on the tip of your tongue but you're terrified that it will just make him walk out here immediately. So instead you watch him with bated breath, waiting for his next move, waiting for him to say something, anything that will put an end to this deafening silence.
Seungcheol takes mercy on you.
"Thank you," he says, voice barely audible. You don't know what he's thanking you for you reply anyway. "Welcome. Though I don't know what you are thanking me for." Seungcheol remains silent for a few beats, his eyes focused on the floor before replying. "For everything. I have a lot to thank you for."
Okay.
You nod mutely, unable to figure out a reply. Another wave of silence settles in the atmosphere like a blanket. You take this time to appreciate his beautiful profile, engraving his features in your mind. The moonlight coming from your window falls on his face partially, illuminating his sculpted lineaments. You get to admire his beauty once more as he sits there but the look on his face tugs at your heartstrings. He looks troubled and in pain, the natural glow of his face somewhat dim. You wonder how the past couple of months have treated him. You wonder how life has been treating him, if he had someone to go to, someone to share his worries with all this time.
"Do you still like me?" His words make your eyes widen as it the last thing you expected to come from him. "You wouldn't be here if I didn't," your words come out harsher than you intended making you regret instantly. Perhaps the pain you have suffered for a while is coming out finally. However, seeing his silence, you reply once more, voice much softer this time, "Of course I still like you, Seungcheol. I have...I have never liked anyone or anything as much as you."
It's an understatement. What you feel for him is love but you would rather keep that to yourself.
"Why?" Seungcheol's voice comes out as a croak as his eyes connect to yours. For the first time, you see so much emotion in them and maybe, maybe even some unshed tears, though you can't be sure because the light is not sufficient right now. Your throat closes up for some reason as your eyes mirror the emotions in his and you desperately try to think, try to give him a reply that he deserves.
"You are very easy to like," you say lamely. Your reply is insufficient but that's all you can manage without starting to bawl like a child. A humourless laugh comes out of Seungcheol and echoes through the otherwise quiet room. "I doubt that," he says, his voice deep. "It's true Seungcheol," you repeat, voice firm.
A mirthless grin settles on his face and you know he isn't buying your words. Swallowing, you carefully, too carefully, scoot towards him and sit down, maintaining a little space between the the two of you. "I don't understand why you hold such negative thoughts about yourself but believe me Seungcheol, it's hard not to fall in love with you."
Your slip-up causes your eyes to widen, face drowning in embarrassment as you realize you just said the L word. Seungcheol, however, does not react to it but turns his head to study your face and the pain and sentiment in his eyes, his passionate gaze on you makes you forget human language. You've never seen nor imagined Seungcheol to be so full of ardor and pain and now that you have, you don't know what to do. You just want to cling to him and cry like a child.
"Can't you see how fucked up I am? What and awful person I am, ____? Someone like me deserves noth-" Unable to hold yourself back you interrupt him by cupping both of his cheeks and pressing your lips to his. You kiss him softly, carefully, trying to gauge his feelings while trying not to push him too hard. Seungcheol stays immobilised, letting you kiss him like that. When you pull back, his eyes are closed and he rests his forehead against yours. "You are just fine, Seungcheol. I like you just the way you are. Don't...beat yourself up like this, hmm?" Your voice is just above a whisper as you tilt his head to meet his eyes. Seungcheol stares quietly at you for a while before suddenly pushing you back and caging you underneath his large body. A squeak of surprise leaves your lips as Seungcheol wastes no time wrapping himself around you while attaching his lips to yours.
This time the kiss is not soft, it is full of passion and vigour and longing as Seungcheol takes the reign. Your lips mold perfectly against each other and Seungcheol does not hold back, kissing you like a starved man; all teeth and tongue. He pulls back for a while, supporting himself on his elbows as you looks at you while you try to catch your breath underneath him. His hand comes to stroke your hair gently, like a lover and your eyes burn at his tenderness.
"Seungcheol-"
"Is there still a place for me in your heart?" He asks, a hopeful note in his voice. His words leave you breathless as you gape at him in suprise, you mouth open slightly. Seungcheol looks at you look longingly as he waits for your answer, which comes easily, without a second thought.
"Of course, Seungcheol. I...I love you."
This time it is his turn to be surprised as his pupils dilate and a soft gasp of surprise escapes from him. Swallowing, you hold his gaze, waiting for his next words but they never come. Instead, the man attacks your lips with renewed fervour while slotting a muscular thigh between your legs. As his toned thigh brushes against your core a wanton moan leaves your mouth and you wrap your legs around his waist. You can feel Seungcheol smirk against your skin while he kisses a path down from jaw towards your neck, taking his sweet time to plant some love bites along the way while you gasp and writhe underneath him. Soon he reaches the valley of your breasts and with skilled fingers he does a quick work of the buttons of your night shirt. His heated gaze remains on your now bare breasts and you can feel your nipples harden in the chill air of the room before he leans down to plant soft kisses all over them. While he does so you continue to grind your core against his leg, desperate for some friction which he is denying you. His assault on your neck and breasts don't stop as he remains focused in marking you, blooming kisses of red and purple on your skin.
"I missed you," His voice comes out as throaty whisper while he keeps his lips attached to your heated skin. "Me too," you choke between moans as his ministrations on your body leaves you aching all over for him.
He pulls back to meet your gaze, "I want you. I... always have and I've been hiding it. But I can't anymore."
"Take me then, Seungcheol," It isn't the most romantic thing to say but that is all your lust clouded brain can manage as you keep grinding yourself against him. You feel his hard on poke your belly and unlike your lover, you really can't wait anymore. You need him now.
Seungcheol keeps looking at you, too busy studying your features rather than doing something about the wetness between your legs and you're about to tell him to do something when he speaks, "I love you, ____. I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused you. Let me make it up to you."
Great. Now you're horny and emotional.
His confession brings tears to your eyes but your neediness is growing so you pull his face down closer to yours and whisper, "You can start doing that by making me cum. And then you can stay. With me. Forever. How about that?" A mischievous grin kisses his face, "I'd love that sweetheart."
You grin in happiness not wasting anymore time as you reconnect your lips with his.
Tumblr media
a/n 2: Whew~ a whopping 15k+! I can't believe I wrote something this huge. But it was well worth it! I just hate this damn app like I don't understand?? I've seen ppl post fics with 40k+ words yet tumb1r says I've reached 250 blocks like what?? Anyhow, I really really hope you enjoyed reading this baby cuz I've been working on it for soooo long! If you did please reblog and share as always your feedbacks are highly appreciated so please leave them in the comments or my ask box!
475 notes · View notes
glowingbadger · 3 years
Text
So many thanks to my lovely followers who helped me come up with this concept! Arranged marriage has been the vibe with some of y'all lately and I am here for it.
Dimitri x Reader arranged marriage
AFAB reader ('wife', but no pronouns)
NSFW 18+
You lie in bed beside your husband- your Lord Husband, you should say -and there seems to be no cure for the anxious restlessness that's made a home in your heart. It had been like that since the moment you'd learned you had been betrothed to the infamous Boar King. A man of legendary strength and rumored temper. A one-eyed titan who had struck down countless foes with untold brutality. Yes, he and his allies had unified the continent. But great deeds can certainly be done at the hands of monsters.
He'd hardly touched you. Hardly looked at you, at first. You believed he must be disgusted by you, by this whole arrangement. But the need for an heir would be of even greater importance in the wake of the recent war, and so the most suitable arrangement (which turned out to be you) had been hastily made the moment the treatise had been signed. And so you'd come to live with the Boar King, and even to share his bed- though not yet in the fullest sense. It had taken a week for him to meet your gaze directly. When that bright blue star leveled on you, you expected to feel aggression, the rage that common folk told tall tales of in taverns. Instead, you felt hesitation. Sadness. Remorse. And a whole host of other things you didn't have names for yet.
By week three, he had tentatively taken your hand to help you off of horseback. That was the first time he ever touched you. You remember that he held you like fine parchment a little too close to a flame. After that, things had come a little more easily. You shared meals, and even a few polite words and the occasional briefest physical contact. He asked about your comfort in the castle. He assured you that anything you should need could be called for. Now, lying next to him in your bed- the bed you would share for the rest of your life -there's a geometrically perfect space between you two. A gap, seemingly exactly calculated to ensure that your bodies were unlikely to meet in the night.
"Ngh..." He groans, his body twitches and tenses. You've learned that the King suffers from nightmares, though of course you haven't let on that you've noticed. Tonight seems to be worse than the others.
"No..." he growls through grinding teeth, "Stay away... go... no-!" his fists grip the sheets so tightly you worry for the fabric. Then, you're not sure what madness prompts it, but you move closer to him. Just a little at first. Inching towards him as though approaching a frightened animal.
"My Lord..." you whisper, and your fingers just briefly graze his arm. He's warm, his body is firm and strong. You'd never allowed yourself to really look at him in his nightclothes before, but the relaxed collar of his shirt reveals defined collarbones and fair skin, but also a cross-hatched web of old scars. Some part of you had known all along, but for the first time, you truly, fully realize that he's actually strikingly handsome.
You lean over him a bit further. His head turns toward you, but he's still in the throes of his nightmares. Panting breaths cause his chest to rapidly rise and fall beneath you, and you can't help but feel the ache of sympathy in your heart. Gently, carefully, you bring a hand to his face. You can feel how tightly his jaw is clenched.
"Your Highness," you speak louder this time. His eye bolts open. His hand seizes you by the wrist hard- too hard. It hurts, and you flinch, but keep your voice down. For a moment, you fear the inevitable retribution that will surely follow. But then, he exhales, and he releases your hand.
"I- I'm sorry- I didn't realize-" he stutters out, and in this moment, he looks softer and sweeter than you've ever seen.
"You were, uhm... having a nightmare, My Lord."
He nods at you, then sighs deeply. You're at a loss for what to do. Shouldn't the King's wife comfort him in such a situation? Would he even accept any comfort you might offer?
That shock blue eye meets you, and you can tell he wants to say something. All he manages is,
"Why do you call me that?"
"I... I'm sorry?"
"'My Lord', 'Your Highness.'" it's too dark to tell for certain, but you almost think that you see a pink flush across his face.
"You're my King." you say meekly.
"I am your husband." he replies, and his eye narrows. It's not quite scolding, but there's definitely frustration there. Truly, it's impossible to tell exactly what he means by saying it, but you can't help the warmth building inside of you. He raises a hand to your cheek, and you're not afraid, though your heart races much the same. His hands are large and calloused, the hands of a man who has created miracles and atrocities, and now it's gingerly brushing your hair from your face. You move closer to him on instinct, and you notice with some relief that he doesn't shy away- not this time. Then, you open your mouth to speak, and nothing comes out at first. You sigh, and try again,
"My- My Lord Husband, you should sleep. I didn't intend to bother you, only to make sure that you were-"
He sighs once more, and his eye closes.
"Sleep will not come, I already know. Not on a night like this."
You certainly don't know what to say to that. Anything you can think of would be meaningless platitudes and hollow assurances. You don't know the man well enough to know his demons, but you're certain there are plenty. The two of you are quiet for a time, and though his breathing has steadied, he shows no signs of regaining sleep any time soon.
And so you do the only thing you can think of to do for him.
You lean forward and press your lips to his. He breathes in sharply, and you feel his frame tense beneath you- but he doesn't pull away. Your hands cradle his face as you place gentle and tentative kisses to his lips, which are far softer than you'd dared to imagine. And as you carefully move atop him to straddle his hips, you feel his hand tightly grip your thigh.
"What are you-?!"
"I thought that I would... perform my wifely duties to you, My Lord Husband. If you'll have me." you add, a slight tremor sneaking into your voice.
His pupil is wide and this time, you're certain that you can see a charming crimson flush across his cheeks. He speaks your name almost incredulously, though his hand hasn't left your body.
"You- you are under no obligation-" he stammers, and when you try to assure him, he presses on, "you're a prisoner to this marriage, don't you understand? I have no right to ask anything of you- much less that you give your body over to me!"
He seems to have completely forgotten that the entire point of this union was to produce an heir.
"I certainly wouldn't force myself on His Highness if I'm not pleasing to you..."
"That is absolutely not what I mean to imply," he says, almost laughing as he scoffs away the very idea, "I desire you as much as any sane person would, of course, but to think that you would be made to do such a thing merely to placate me-"
"I want this." you say, surprising even yourself with the strength of your words. You sound even more confident than you feel. But every word the King says to you peels away at the wall of anger and fear that you both had been content to keep between you until now, and you feel strongly about your decision. Still, he pauses a moment longer, as if waiting for you to back away from your claim. And when you don't, he draws you down to him and kisses you deeply. You can already feel his manhood rising between your thighs, but soon enough it's just one more piece of information amidst a whirlwind of sensations.
His strong arms wrap around you and his kiss travels down your neck to your chest. He fumbles awkwardly with the front of your nightshirt, so you remove it for him and he wordlessly returns to sucking gentle love-bites to your skin. Shy and curious moans and sighs surround you both in the dark of your bedchambers as you eagerly explore each other. His hands are rough, but he's trying so dearly to be delicate with you. You're more direct, your fingers tangled in golden hair and your body flush to his, creating an intoxicating friction between you.
Your lower body shifts more firmly against him, grinding his now quite stiff member between your thighs. He growls against your skin, and you feel his fingers drag down your back.
"I... ought to do more for you..."
Ostensibly, he means in terms of intimacy, but you have a strange feeling that he intends this to be a more general statement. You rest your forehead to his and murmur,
"I want you, My King."
"Dimitri." he says as his hands trail down to help remove your underclothes, "Just Dimitri, I beg of you."
And soon enough, he's pressed hot at your slick entrance, and you cling to him as he begins to push inside. He's thick- it hurts just a little, and you think for a moment that he was probably right that you both should have done more to prepare. But now he's filling you inch by inch, stretching you out around his cock, and your mind is numb to every thought except one- this is my husband, my lover.
"Dimitri..." You moan into the evening air around you as he bottoms out deep within you and the tinge of pain begins to fade into pleasure. He gives no reply other than the potent throbbing of his cock, rubbing against your inner walls as you both begin to move. You're surprised by how easy it is to fall into a natural rhythm with him. Your hips sink down onto him as he thrusts up towards you, and each pass sends a jolt up your spine. Dimitri buries his face in the crook of your neck, panting softly, holding onto your hips as you squeeze tightly around him.
Your nails dig along his muscled shoulders as you feel your climax winding tight at your core. He doesn't seem to mind- you're not sure if he even notices. His pace picks up. Briefly, his hands ease their hold on you, as though offering a means of escape. You have no need for such a thing. With a whimpering moan, you press yourself as far down onto his cock as you can until his tip hits your core, then sway forward, grinding his length into you until, with a gasp of his name, your body slacks into his arms.
He whispers your name in turn with something like awe in his voice. With his cock now coated in your climax, Dimitri loosens his restraint, and begins fucking into you in earnest. While your thighs tremble and you can hardly keep yourself supported above him, you manage to meet his gaze and smile warmly, then press a tender kiss to his parted lips. He grits his teeth, and he holds you to him with such strength that you no longer even need to support yourself. Then, he swells, twitches, and his pleasure is spilling out deep inside of you, filling you and warming you through.
You moan happily as you feel his release, then relax your body to lay comfortably against his sturdy frame. He's panting harshly still, but neither of you rush to separate from one another. Once he's just barely composed himself, he lifts your chin and kisses you with a sweetness that you never thought you'd find in a man, let alone the Boar King himself.
Though, once you've eased his spent manhood from you and laid your head against his chest, you hear his heart beating, still just a bit too fast and fluttery. You think for a moment that, yes, your husband is the legendary, ruthless Boar King. Your husband is also Dimitri, a man who looks at you with sincerity that makes your heart ache. A man you don't know well- not yet -but who you find yourself opening to more and more each day.
"I... don't wish to keep you awake terribly long..." he says, with a stilted nervousness to his voice, "but, if you're not overly tired, I- I'd like to... talk for a little while."
You smile a warm, but private smile, then say,
"I'd like that very much, Dimitri."
506 notes · View notes
aro-is-gay-af · 3 years
Text
The Midnight of Despair | Volturi Kings x fem!reader | Part 3
I reckon, that if you’re reading Part 3, then you know two previous ones. In case you didn’t read them yet: Part 1 | Part 2
Thank you for all warm words and praise! It means world to me. 
I also love this series, folks! I need to admit, I did get addicted to it a little, so I thought it’d be great to set updates schedule. It won’t be precise, but you can expect another part roughly in two weeks time from now. 
As per usual, sorry for any confusion and grammatical mistakes. 
Warnings: Rape (mentioned), Depression, PTSD, Forced Pregnancy, Blood
Word count: 6200
No summary this time. Also, this one has very sweet parts in it!!!
Tumblr media
ENJOY!
The next day, you had your appointment with the doctor. A doctor was apparently a woman and you were sure the kings were paying her something extra for the visit to be immediate. Unfortunately, she didn’t know any English, as she was a local gynaecologist. Your mates didn’t want you to feel uncomfortable in any way, so before the visit, Aro asked you, who you’d like to be the translator for you.
The ideal situation would be a woman, but you didn’t trust anyone in the castle, except the kings. For this reason, your first shot was Aro, as he had already seen your memories. There was nothing that would shock him, you also didn’t need to hide anything from him and you knew, he was the best at dealing with others. You figured it’d be an ideal solution and you had to admit to yourself that you simply wanted him to accompany you.
The whole visit took place in your room, which meant a lot of carrying the necessary equipment, but more mental comfort for you. In those two days, you managed to get quite settled in and didn't want to leave the castle. You felt safe and secured in your suite. Kings seemed to notice that, as it was Marcus, who proposed, it would be a great idea to have an appointment without the need of leaving your room.
While you both were waiting for the doctor to come, it was the first time you had seen Aro with brown eyes. He looked really out of place. You shared this thought with him, by saying you prefer when his eyes are normal. That’s what it took. Two days, to consider red eyes normal. As usual, he was polite and revealed to you that he also hated the colour, let alone the lenses.
When the doctor finally arrived, you were already a nervous wreck. Aro tried to distract you, asking questions mainly about your house in Forks and whether you had already spoken to Bella about family heirlooms. He succeeded for a while, but it couldn't last forever, could it?
The lady was extremely kind and gentle. The truth was, it was hard to hide how stressed you were about this visit. You didn't want anyone to touch you, not when you weren't ready, and this time you definitely weren't. Despite the doctor's initial efforts, you were unable to shake her hand in greeting. She only smiled sadly, as if understanding perfectly what you were going through. Aro assured you beforehand, for he had not told her anything and only if you wanted to, you should share your trauma with her.
The doctor, seeing your nervousness, decided that you should talk first. While she asked you questions, you noticed that she chose her words carefully and only then did you realise that she was also stressed, but in her case it was probably Aro's presence that made her uncomfortable. Although Aro tried not to impose his presence on her, you understood why it might overwhelm the doctor. You felt confident being in the same room with Aro, while she probably sensed danger, even if she could not rationally explain it to herself. You promised yourself that you would try to learn at least the basics of Italian before the next visit.
She needed to ask you about exactly everything since, unfortunately, you didn't have any medical records with you - neither from the obduction, nor from the subsequent visit to the doctor, where you confirmed the pregnancy. You made a mental note to tell Bella about it, so she could send your documents, along with the things she was supposed to take from your house.
Aro was great in his translator role. Of course, you were still looking at the doctor, while answering the questions, but Aro’s voice, at least, soothed your shattered nerves just a little bit. When the questions started to get more complicated or more intimate, Aro used such words as to not make you feel uncomfortable, while still conveying the meaning.  The more difficult part started, when you had to describe the situation from the hospital and how long it took for the bleeding to stop. Every word seemed linked to a particular image or smell from that night, until finally, you were unable to say anything at all.
The doctor was very understanding, probably having already guessed what exactly was your weird behaviour all about. You didn't say anything directly, you only described the situation from the hospital and then told her the details of this strange bleeding after the rape. Mainly because the doctor was very concerned about it. She explained to you that it was definitely not normal, even if you had wounds inside.
The worst part, however, was the examination. You didn't even want to think about whether you would have to undress, but it turned out to be unnecessary. The doctor had a great intuition, even if she herself was under a bit of stress. You told her that, indeed, you had been to the check-up before and that was how you found out you were pregnant. And that the doctor then checked if all the wounds had healed. The lady didn’t discuss the issue, for which you were very grateful.
After the interview, the doctor told you to lie down on the bed and only pull your blouse up, high enough for your belly to be visible. You didn't feel comfortable with this, but you preferred this way to undressing from the waist down. This was the first time you didn't feel comfortable lying on that bed. You knew that once the visit was over, everything would return to normal, but it wasn’t meant to become a memory you would return to with pleasure.
As it turned out, your first trimester was long over. The pregnancy was about 14 weeks old and that would explain the slight curving of your belly. Before the appointment, you were not sure if you would even look at the monitor to see the baby, but you did. You could not deny yourself this. The room fell silent and you could not tell what you were feeling.
The doctor pulled out some kind of a strange device and after a moment, you could hear the baby's heart. You glanced in the direction of Aro, who was obviously alarmed by your face. You grimaced, too overwhelmed to say anything to him. Up until this point, you were sure that the decision, if you should terminate the pregnancy or not, would be fairly easy. Now, you were certain that nothing in your life could be simple enough.
 *
 Over the next few weeks, your day usually looked the same or similar, yet you managed to do something completely different every day. You were glad you had so much to do, because you didn't have time to think about what had happened. You didn't want to analyse it over and over again. The kings respected your choice - unless you yourself mentioned the traumatic events, not a single insinuation or implication about it fell from their lips.
Your days were filled with various activities. Every day you spent at least some time with each king in private - you knew you needed this to create and strengthen your bond. To keep you from being inundated with information, you learned something new from each of them about vampires and their lifestyle. After all, it was supposed to become your lifestyle in the nearest future. You discovered that thinking about your transformation caused you far less anxiety, than any memory associated with rape. Even after you learned that it more or less consisted of burning alive for a few days.
During your time with the kings, you tried not to show the insecurity you had acquired about your body, and yet, you were sure they knew anyway. However, the time spent with them was what you treasured most. With each of them you did something different, as you wanted to know what they like to do in their free time. Marcus, as he had promised on the first day, taught you Italian for two hours every day. It was not easy, but after a few weeks of intensive course and communicating in broken Italian, not only with Marcus, but also with the other two, you were able to maintain basic conversation.
Marcus was a great teacher, but that wasn’t the only reason why you loved spending time with him. He was the one who had the most time for you - he wasn't as busy as Aro or Caius, and besides, he had countless amounts of patience. He wasn't tired of your constant questions, not only about vampirism, but also about his past. You would often sit for hours in the library or in the gardens, which, by the way, were breathtaking. You both loved books and your only regret was that you weren't able to read most of their vast collection. Marcus assured you, you would have all eternity to do so. You could talk with him endlessly, as these conversations were truly effortless – even the most difficult topics seemed simple and uncomplicated.
You were surprised to learn about a gift of his. Your human mind was unable to comprehend it in the full sense of the word. Mostly because of this, he was the one to explain to you, what your bond even was and how exactly it worked. You have learned that after your transformation, you will feel the bond even more strongly. It is not often that one person has as many as three matches and is able to feel the bond while being human. Marcus explained to you that for now, both your mind and body are only subconsciously sensing the presence of the mates, as it’s impossible for human senses to do anything else.
It was so remarkable to you that you discussed it for hours. You also learned that the bond can be broken, as it is not forced in any way. However, this would be emotionally painful and very few vampires would choose to take such a desperate step.
One afternoon you were spending time in the garden again. You loved being outdoors, but for your own safety you did not go outside the castle grounds. Together, you decided that it would be safer to do only after your transformation. Besides, you didn't want to go anywhere. You were safe under the watchful eye of your mates and Renata, who, apart from the time spent with the kings and in your room, followed you in a constant manner.
The gardens were gorgeous and you wondered, who was taking care of all those magnificent flowers. You were strongly convinced that this was exactly what Eden might have looked like. You and Marcus had your favourite bench. You spent a lot of time outside, especially on sunny days. When you first found out why sitting in the sun might be a problem, you couldn't take your eyes off Marcus. He shimmered brilliantly, but your eyesight couldn't stand it for too long, because of the blinding effect. The gardens, however, were fenced off and inaccessible to the common passer-by, so you were safe to stay, as long as you wanted to.
“I asked Aro recently, if vampires can be killed in some way,” you began cautiously, not wanting to scare him away from this conversation. No one had talked to you about it, however, it still crossed your mind what state Marcus was in when you first saw him. You were willing to swear you looked exactly the same after your mother died. Now, knowing what all the mating bond was about, you were convinced that Marcus had lost someone dear to his heart.
As per usual, he smiled gently at you.
“I'm sure his answer was sufficient, my dear. What are you aiming at?” he asked, looking at you obliquely.
You took his hand in yours. With Marcus, physical contact was as easy as a conversation. He, however, never initiated any touch. He waited for you, just like he was waiting now, to reach for his hand or gently grasp his arm. The only movement he allowed himself was to stroke your hair every now and then, but only when he was absolutely sure you were willing.
“I wanted to ask what happens to the bond, when the vampire…is no longer here,” you said bluntly, not taking your eyes off him. Your understanding was unique. Marcus was gentle in manner, patient and extremely caring towards you. In no way did you want to ruin, what you had built over those few weeks.
His smile turned into one of the saddest you've seen on his face. By the time he answered, you regretted asking at all. You didn't want to cause him pain. You squeezed his fingers in your palm.
“Until you came to Volterra, I was sure that a vampire could only experience this special, unique bond once in a lifetime. I did experience it, yet this story does not have a happy ending,” he said, with utmost sadness in his voice.
Your heart ached, as you watched his suffering and grief. You had asked the question unnecessarily, but now there was no turning back. You continued to stroke his fingers, holding his hand securely in yours.
“When one of the vampires connected by mating bond dies, it does not mean that the bond disappears. It exists, but only on one side. It cannot be cherished, it cannot be repaired in any way. It isn’t reciprocated. What remains are the memories, and they are the only reminder of what the bond really meant, when it existed,” he explained in a distressed voice, slowly and carefully.
Holding his hand, you laid your head on his shoulder and sighed heavily.
“I'm so sorry this happened to you,” you whispered after a moment, feeling tears stinging under your eyelids. Even now, you couldn't imagine losing any of them and you couldn't possibly envision the amount of pain Marcus had gone through.
He embraced you carefully and gently hugged you to his side.
"Don't fret over it, cara. I've made my peace with it. However, that doesn't mean I've forgotten. I still miss her, after all these years," he said with longing in his voice, stroking your shoulder gently.
After a long moment of silence, you were in a genuinely poor condition. Tears dripped down your cheeks and your breathing quickened. Not only because of the pain Marcus must have gone through, but also because of your own yearning. You had come to terms with the death of your parents, but you missed them so much. You wanted to have them at least a little longer. Now, standing on the verge of immortality, you wished you had spent more time with them.
Marcus placed a kiss on your hair.
“Sob it out, dear. Nothing helps the soul more than honest tears,” he whispered, and you were ashamed, because you should be the one providing comfort for him. However, the memories were too fresh and you couldn't hold it back.
Once you had calmed down a bit, he handed you a handkerchief to wipe away your tears.
“I wish I could change my memories. Even if it was only for a brief moment to be able to forget that I will never see them again. To be able to forget what this…this monster did to me,” you whispered, snuggling tighter into his shoulder.
You heard his sigh and his embrace around your shoulder tightened.
“You have been terribly abused, cara. No one deserves such a fate. The most important thing now, is to get on with life. Our loved ones would not want us to dwell on their deaths,” he said, as wise and thoughtful, as ever. The hatred towards your abuser was palpable in Marcus’s voice.
“You are so good to me. I don't deserve this,” you whispered after a while, your voice swollen with emotion. He only smiled indulgently.
“You deserve the very best, dear. I've already lost one mate. I won't let anyone hurt you.”
“I’m sure she would be proud of you,” you said with compassion, after another moment of silence.
“I’m not quite certain about that,” he said, placing another kiss on the top of your head.
But you were sure. You were also sure, you would do anything to prevent Marcus from experiencing something like this again. You knew all too well the taste of grief.
 *
 You truly had little time to think about the rape and pregnancy at all. If you weren’t with Marcus, it was Caius who loved to kidnap you, so he could spent some private time with you. Caius was the complete opposite of Marcus – absolute chaos, you could say. You had no idea how the brothers even got along. You had already noticed that Marcus rarely spoke, while Caius was rather impulsive and liked to discuss things in detail. However, until you started spending time alone, you had no idea what he was really passionate about.
It turned out that his greatest passion was art. He would show you countless paintings he himself had painted throughout the centuries. He could talk for hours about types of paint and how to mix colours properly. Although you were not very good at painting, you tried to learn a little with Caius’ help. When he was alone with you, he was still abrupt and impulsive, but in a charming way. He never imposed himself on you and you discovered that annoying him was really great fun. So banter and frequent teasing were the order of the day.
You often spent afternoons and evenings with Caius. He taught you how to paint, but not only. Art history was his passion and you loved to listen to him tell stories. His voice was mesmerising and hypnotic. He also eagerly answered all your questions about vampire race. You listened about the horrible children of the moon and how Caius singlehandedly had almost slaughtered them all. He warned you that after the transformation you would be violent and impulsive, that you would have nothing on your mind but to satisfy your thirst. This frightened you slightly, but at times when things got weird or dangerous, Caius assured you that you would always have full support of your mates. You never doubted that. You knew they would help you to grow accustomed to your new life.
Caius loved every variety of art you could name. When he asked you for permission to sculpt you, you were so surprised that you made a strange sound. He said that, of course, he wasn't going to overstep your boundaries and you yourself would choose some beautiful casual attire, so he could portray your beauty in sculpture. All you had to do was dress once as he asked and stand in the right pose. He remembered every detail of your posture, including your facial expressions. Often, he would sculpt you, while you would talk about insignificant things also learning how to sculpt...well, things that didn't resemble anything. Yet, you wanted to be as good as he was.
You were in your nineteenth week, when he invited you for a long painting session. His studio was huge and consisted of nothing but breathtaking works of art. You were decorating some random sculpture that you had never seen before. Caius also loved contemporary art, so you could go wild. Taking classes with him was better, than any therapy. You could smear paint on everything - the canvas, the sculptures, yourself, and even him, because he was usually in a good mood and you could enjoy it. He never showed you even a trace of anger, and you, fooling around with him like that, were genuinely pleased and happy.
When you finished, the room looked rather bad, not to mention the clothes or your hair. Caius would never have appeared that way to the guards, let alone on trial, but with you it was different.
“I wanted to show you something,” he said, wiping the paint off your cheek.
You took his hand. Caius, like Marcus, did not invade your personal zone, unless you specifically gave permission. However, carnality and touch were important to him, and so, once you were more comfortable in his presence, he liked to show you affection by stroking your cheek or your back, and intertwining his fingers with yours, when you held hands. You didn't mind his cold skin – by now you were accustomed to it, as three of them had similar body temperature. You were the hottest here. Literally.
You walked slowly to another room.
“I didn't tell you, but I finished craving” he said, and you could hear the excitement in his voice. You smiled at him. That was the main reason why you had agreed to have yourself sculpted in the first place. You wanted to get close to him on a level, which was inaccessible to do in any other way.
“Before you show me, will you tell me as to where you even got the idea of carving me?” you asked, amused. Caius was much taller than you, you had to slightly lift your head to look him straight in the eye.
At first, he smiled archly, but immediately his smile softened. He pulled at the material that covered the sculpture, so that it fell to the floor. You were simply speechless. The woman, who stood opposite to you was over four metres tall. The sculpture was made of marble and the woman looked, as if she was an actual person. There was something elusive about her. Her face, thoughtful yet serene, her hair flowing freely over her shoulders onto her back. She was clad in a fine fabric that flowed in waves down to her bare feet. She looked nothing like you and yet, you two looked exactly alike.
You had no idea that you started crying. The woman was beautiful. You could feel the power and dignity emanating from her, and on the other hand, she seemed to you as if... fragile and ephemeral. Caius had captured in this sculpture all the feelings you had been feeling, without even knowing it.
You felt his hand on your cheek, his fingers gently wiping away your tears along with some paint, which remained on your face.
“I thought I would like you to see yourself through my eyes. Exactly as I see you – without a single flaw, yet with all your imperfections. I don't want you to be unable to look at yourself, because of what this animal did to you. I don't see it. I only see you, [Y/N]. The real you. Beautiful and fragile, yet powerful, without inhibitions or scruples. Capable of anything.”
The words were trapped in your throat. You wanted to say something, but you were sure, that as soon as you were going to open your mouth, uncontrollable sob would come out. You looked first at Caius, then at the woman carved in marble, then back at Caius. He only smiled gently.
“Who we are – we decide that ourselves. No one else does. To me, you are beautiful. Pure. Never think otherwise, dolcezza.”
Without warning, you hugged him so hard, that it hurt. You forgot that his skin was different from yours. He embraced you without hesitation, even though you were all covered in paint. You wept, cuddling into his chest, as he soothingly stroked your hair and back.
Once you had slightly calmed down, you looked up at him. His blond hair looked like a halo over his head. He amazed you in every sense of the word.
“Thank you. Thank you for letting me see this,” you whispered poignantly, and then went straight back to hugging him.
“There's nothing to thank you for, my lovely [Y/N]. I would like you to accept yourself as you are. Because you are truly magnificent.”
 *
 The only person you talked straightforward about pregnancy was Aro. Was it because of his gift? Most likely, and you simply felt you could trust him. From the moment you first found yourself in his arms, the bond between you two only strengthened. Also, a memorable visit from the doctor was also significant, and then, together with him, you went through the documents that Bella had sent you. To say he was furious, was an understatement. Yes, Aro saw your memories, but the reports were written from a third-person perspective. And the other evening was really awful – you couldn't stop crying because you couldn't block out the flow of memories.
You were close with each other; close enough for you to try to overcome your insecurities, to talk about how you really felt about this whole situation you found yourself in. It was far from easy, but Aro was a really patient specimen. In the course of these talks, you discussed practically everything. You knew that every scenario had to be worked out and discussed, because there were many different options of the outcome.
Despite many conversations, you were still unsure about keeping the baby. You didn't know if you wanted to, if you would be able to raise it and then tell it that it would forcibly have to become a vampire. After the doctor's appointment, things did not get any easier for you. You heard the heart and knew that the child was not to blame for its father’s actions. You were raped, but this child had nothing to do with it.
So you waited. You waited for a miracle to decide for you or for the baby to move when you were thinking of having it removed. It’d be a sign not to do it. However, nothing of the sort was happening and fate was not deciding for you. Aro convinced you that, even if you decided to have an abortion, there was nothing wrong about it. No one would blame you for it. The only person to blame here, was the monster who raped you.
You hadn't decided what you would do about the pregnancy, but you and Aro knew what would happen, if something went wrong. For your mates, it was your health and life that came first. Aro assured you of that a thousand times over. Because of this, if anything went wrong with the birth or if there were any complications, you were to be changed immediately. Also because of this, Aro talked to you about all aspects of your transformation. He was the one who introduced you to what transformation actually looks like. He didn't scare you with the pain you were about to go through, but only gave you the facts. Facts that you needed to know.
When you weren't talking about such serious matters, Aro also loved to spend time talking to you, but about different topics. He seemed to know all your thoughts, but you were still able to surprise him. He explained to you, that the human mind was more disordered and chaotic, than vampire one and that he certainly didn't see everything. Your brain chose the memories, often associated with strong feelings and emotions, which were meant to be remembered. You were joyful about this, because you could talk endlessly and he kept finding out something new about you. And you kept finding something new about him. You knew from the first moment that he was extraordinary, and the more you talked, the more you became certain about it.
Besides, Aro adored dancing. You were not convinced about this form of activity, but it was the intimacy of this act that convinced you. In his arms, no one was able to hurt you. You felt safe and, after many attempts, quite confident in your movements. He literally beamed, being able to teach you to dance and to be so close to you. You found nothing in his eyes but the infinite adoration he had for you. When you found out the reason behind this, your heart almost broke with sorrow and compassion.
“I must confess something to you, cara mia,” he whispered, holding you securely in his arms. It was evening, you had long since been prepared for sleep. He found your long nightgown to his liking, when he came to check how you were doing and if you needed anything. You rested your head on his shoulder. There was no music, he was the one giving the rhythm to your movements, yet it was the most wonderful dance you had yet had the chance to dance with him.
“Do tell, please,” you said, trying not to lose the rhythm. You were tired, as throughout the day you sorted through the things Bella sent you from Forks. In addition, you worked with Marcus to sell your house, because you were, after all, a little concerned about what hands your family home would pass into.
“I have been bound over the centuries to both men and women. My ex-wife, Sulpicia, whom you know and, to the best of my knowledge, whom I permitted to leave, was my faithful companion, basically from the beginning of my immortality. However, until now, I did not know what it meant to have a true mate.”
He tilted you gently, wishing to look into your eyes. You continued to sway to a non-existent rhythm, completely oblivious to your surroundings. You furrowed your brows.
“Are you serious?” you asked in a whisper, not wanting to ruin the moment. The light emanating from the candles, illuminated half of his face. He smiled, and you were unable to take your eyes off his red irises.
“Yes, my dear. I have waited over three thousand years for you. I must tell you, that I could wait another three millennia, only to see your beautiful face,” he said affectionately, holding you tighter against him to stroke your flushed cheek with his fingers.
Your eyes welled up with tears and he slowly bent down and kissed your forehead.
“That's enough for today, cara mia. You must rest well. Caius has something planned for tomorrow, but he didn't want to reveal what, under any circumstances,” he said amused, giggling under his breath. You loved when Aro was in a good mood, because then you were in a good mood too. Before he walked you to bed, he wiped away your tear. You squeezed his hand in yours, then climbed onto the bed. He covered you carefully with a duvet and stroked your hair.
“I'm glad I came here,” you whispered, looking into his eyes. “I never want to leave you,” you said with force. He smiled softly at you and stroked your hair once more.
“We will always be by your side, [Y/N]. Good night, cara.”
His voice so soft and tuneful that as soon as he snuffed out the candles, you drifted off to sleep in an instant.
 *
 Apart from the fact that almost everything was going great and your mental state was in constant improvement, your relationship with Bella had severely worsened. In the beginning you talked every evening. She still couldn't understand why you were selling the house and why you wouldn't, at least, want to visit Forks. After a while, you got fed up with explaining it to her. There were an awful lot of things she wasn't happy about and she didn't hide it. She kept criticising the Volturi without knowing them and having no idea, what they were actually doing.
You loved her like a sister, but because of that, she could annoy you exactly like one. Because of her pinching remarks and your lack of patience, you called each other less and less. You didn't want to keep getting annoyed and you were tired of explaining things to her. Besides, you didn't like that she didn't say a single good word about your mates. You at least tried to accept Edward. Suddenly, what he did to her was all forgotten and you couldn't understand it. You didn't know, what was happening to your sister and your stay in Italy didn’t exactly make things better. You still hoped that once you saw each other after the transformation, you would be able to explain it all to one another. You didn't want to lose Bella, the last person you considered family.
So you talked less and less or not at all, and when you did, you avoided difficult and sensitive topics. It was not like with Bella at all and it made you anxious. You were at ease with each other, almost always, and you didn’t get why she was so bitter and hateful towards your knew, chosen life. Especially, because partially your presence right then, in the trial chamber, was the reason for her to be alive at all.
Shortly after Caius presented you with your sculpted self, you were to spend the whole day together, the four of you. These were the days you loved the most. Although you cherished the time spent with each of your mates separately, the presence of all three put you in an ecstatic mood. You usually spent your afternoons like this – there were still a lot of things to do and solve, and a lot of trials to carry out.
Being in Volterra for so long, you learned a lot about the existing laws and how to enforce them. You knew that kings were not flawless, but it was logical to you that keeping the entire vampire world in line, required some sacrifices. Some greater than the other ones.
You usually sat down in the study, where you had ended the very first day, at a round table. You listened to the discussions and arguments, but also just spent time with your mates. You often sat on Aro's lap or tried to calm Caius down, when he became too agitated.
You were extremely excited since the morning, because they promised you a whole day outside. It wasn't often that all three of them wanted to spend time with you in the gardens, so you couldn't restrain your exhilaration. However, there were also days, or rather moments, when, under any circumstances, you could not leave your room. Such a moment was to occur today, after breakfast. You slept for a long time, almost until eleven o'clock. When you ate your breakfast, it was Renata who informed you that it was time to eat. Of course, you knew what it was about.
The only situation, in which you could not leave your chamber, was at lunchtime. Not yours, though, but the lunchtime of all the vampires, who inhabited the castle. For your own safety, usually for about two hours, you were not to leave and to occupy yourself with whatever you wanted. The only two hours, in which Renata or anyone else was not around you. Not many people knew about your stay in the castle and because of this, the kings decided that Renata should eat with the rest of the company.
You did not consider it strange in the slightest. Of course, you tried not to think about the fact that people would die, but you knew that they were chosen at random. Which meant that they could just as well have been run over by a car or they could have died in a fire. You did not think about it. You were just enjoying your two hours of freedom. Sometimes you sunbathed on the balcony, prepared your outfit or just played on the computer. These were little things that still reminded you of being human.
This week, when Renata told you that she would be gone for a while, you were already enjoying a long soak in the bathtub. The home spa was one of the favourite things you and your mum liked to do together. You poured hot water into the tub, applied a mask that you had prepared yourself with a few ingredients and relaxed.
Since you had no idea when, you were no longer afraid to look in the mirror. Sure, your body shape was far from ideal, but at least you weren’t terrified to look. You weren’t terrified to acknowledge that, yes, your body was raped, but you were recovering from it. And that you started to think that your body didn’t cause any of this.
After some time you spent in the bathtub, you felt a little dizzy. It wasn’t exactly a good sign, so you figured it’d be wise to get out of the tub. When you rinsed yourself off with clean water, you stood up, and that was the moment of terror. The room immediately started spinning, like you were on roundabout for the last forty minutes. You felt nauseous, but there was nothing near you to which you could cling to. You managed to step out of the tub, on the marble step, and then you felt it. Pain, excruciating pain, suffocation. Streams of blood went down your legs and before you fell onto the ground, you could only see white marble floor all covered in sanguineous blood.
612 notes · View notes
roniscloud · 3 years
Text
lhs - runnin’
Tumblr media
lee heeseung [a. + f. 4700 words] runnin’
to you
you came up on some new
i know i shouldn’t feel blue
‘cause i was runnin’ out of time for you
synopsis: you met heeseung in your freshman year of college and immediately hit it off. you’ve made it to your third year and when everyone including yourselves thought that you were each other’s endgame, the devastation when you two split was immeasurable. you both know there’s still love between you. this break allows you both to realize new things. can you two find your ways back to each other? will this be the final goodbye?
genre + tropes: angst. fluff. comedy. college!au. establishedrelationship!au. exes!au.
warnings: fem reader. swearing. arguing. nosy friends. cold heeseung and cold reader. drifting relationship. interventions. slight suggestive themes but it’s only mentioned like once. they both pine over each other. mentions of alcohol and binge drinking. maybe not a happy ending. if you choose to see it that way. whoops. appearances of the rest of enha plus txt yeonjun and soobin.
Tumblr media
i.  the break
“so this is how it’s gonna end? i thought we were doing fine.”
heeseung erupts into an even angrier fit, “are you kidding me? we are not fucking fine. in what world is this fine? tell me!”
you scoff from where you stand cross-armed on the other side of the bedroom. “well, can you really blame me? it’s hard to see if there’s something wrong if we never see each other.”
“exactly my point! we don’t see each other.”
the two of you have been at each other’s throats since heeseung showed up at your apartment. you have no idea how long ago that was or when the argument started. all you remember is coming up to him when he arrived, wanting to actually spend some time with him. instead he shrugged you off and ignored you, blaming the fatigue. the rest has been a blur. one of you made an offhand comment and now here you are: frustrated and in another fight.
a quick recap: you two met at a mutual friend’s party. you thought that each other was attractive and he ended up asking you out. from there you kept going out, fell in love, dated, and everyone thought you were perfect together. three years later and it’s getting tiring. life has been draining trying to balance it all.
“and who’s fault is that?”
annoyed, he snaps back, “oh please, you can not put the blame solely on me.”
“bullshit. i sure can when i’m the only one making an effort here. i’ve actually been trying to save us. you, on the other hand…” you pause again, rolling your eyes, “well, we both know just how much you care.”
his jaw drops, defensively he spits back, “are you genuinely implying that i don’t care about you? about us? that’s rich.”
you move to sit on the edge of the bed, staring at a single spot on the floor. you can see the shadow of heeseing pacing back and forth. you sit there, not looking at each other. the only sounds to be heard are his footsteps and the heavy sighs from you. you think back to the last several weeks. you recall each of the times you have been able to see each other. there’s no substance, nothing memorable. the only thing that comes to mind is that you always end up not talking at all or arguing.
just like right now.
“be real, heesung. when was the last time we went on a date? when was the last time you stayed the night without it ending up with you just knocking out? when was the last time we actually sat down and had a conversation? be honest because i will. i can’t remember.”
“and yet you thought we were fine?”
“well it’s better to believe a good lie than face the hurtful truth. i’m trying to save this relationship. i’m trying all the fucking time and you don’t do shit.”
he spits back frustrated, “well maybe that’s because there’s nothing to be saved.”
“are you kidding me right now? am i supposed to be scared? you tell me that there’s nothing to be saved and expect me to just give up?”
“sorry but i’m not running from this anymore.”
“you’re not sorry and we both know it.” you push yourself back up to stand, resting your hands on your hips, “you can’t say you’re sorry and expect me to forgive you. that’s not how this works.”
“this isn’t what i wanted to happen. this isn’t how it was supposed to go.”
“then make it work.”
“i- i can’t,” he holds his hands over his face, running one through his hair, “it’s too much.”
“so what? what do you mean?”
he finally stops. he takes a deep breath and lets it all out, “i just can’t see this working anymore, at least not like this.”
Tumblr media
ii. week one
you thought this would be more difficult. that this would be the hardest pill to swallow. the first week apart may actually be the easiest. nothing has really changed. that’s probably because you haven’t told anyone that you two are no longer together. perhaps the time that you didn’t spend with each other before the break up had trained you for this.
life goes on, with or without heeseung. that’s what you keep telling yourself. you choose to get caught up with your life. you have other priorities. it’s not a crime to focus on yourself for the first time in three years.
heeseung feels the same. he doesn’t see any point on dwelling on the breakup. sure, he was the one who made the decision. he’s the one who put it out there. he’s the one who ended it and the one who is taking responsibility.
lucky for both of you, you don’t have any courses together and your schedules don’t really coincide. there’s no chance at any awkward run-ins. there is this weird, tiny feeling though. there’s this small inkling of something missing. you both suppress it. i mean, hell, the breakup just happened.
Tumblr media
iii. scheming
meanwhile, your friends have all seemed to notice that the two of you are off. they aren’t sure what it is. they get that you two have had some time apart, but you’re both adults with lives. you have your own classes, jobs, other friends, and such. no one mentions it because they don’t think it’s their business.
but come on… there’s no way they won’t get to the bottom of it. our resident gossips, sunoo and sunghoon, team up and make it their mission to snoop around. of course, they take precautions to not get caught. the scheming duo find out nothing, to no avail.
now the gang of the scheming duo plus jay, jake, and niki have convened in the common room of jungwon’s dorm building. the 02z are all playing billiards in one corner. sunoo battles jungwon in a game of ping pong. the youngest of the group sits by himself on one of the couches, contemplating if he should speak up. they’ve been in a heated discussion as they try to figure out what exactly has been irking them.
riki, against his own conscience, speaks up to the five. he has this gut feeling and innocently wants to voice his opinion. “what if,” the young boy start out while gauging the faces of the others, “now don’t get mad and just hear me out.” he stops again, taking his time to make eye contact with each of the older boys, waiting until they all nod, “what if… they broke up?”
the group of friends all exchange glances with each other before breaking out into laughter. jay composes himself a bit, still chuckling when he says, “seriously? you think they broke up? heeseung and y/n? yeah, no way.”
sunoo leans onto the ping pong table and eggs him on, “they are literally soulmates.”
jungwon sets his racket down and goes to plop himself next to riki on the couch, “there is no way in hell the two of them split.”
Tumblr media
iv. breaking news
“yeah, we split.” plain and simple. three words that crushed the poor hearts of jake and jungwon. he broke the news over brunch. he sensed their curiosity when they deliberately never brought you up. 
“good joke there, dude. almost had me for a second.” jake says, awkwardly with a forced laugh.
the youngest of the three chiming in and agreeing, “yeah, that’s really funny.” a silence hits the booth. “you are joking… right?”
the oldest then looks back and forth between the two, tilting his head to one side like a confused pup. he doesn’t see why they think he would joke and simply replies, “nope. you guys haven’t asked so i’m guessing you tried to snoop around and pick up on my cues. i’m also guessing sunoo’s behind this whole operation.”
“ok wait,” jake interjects, “what do you mean you broke up? you can’t just break up.”
jungwon agrees, “he’s right. you two are just playing a prank on us.”
“guys, i’m serious. y/n and i are no longer together.” the two just freeze, jaws dropped, eyes wide. “besides, it’s better this way.”
Tumblr media
v. bad timing
meanwhile the remaining four members of their friend group have met up in the campus library in an attempted study session. so far, they’ve just gone back to gossiping and slacking off. the boys all find themselves teetering on the verge of sleep. that is until sunghoon catches you walking in. immediately going to softly pat the others back awake, they all look up confused. trying to stay subtle, hoon jerks his head to the side in your direction.
you make your way to one of the shelves, searching high and low for a book you need for your literature class. sneaking up behind you comes choi yeonjun, the library aid and a friend of yours. 
“need any help?”
“no thanks, i’m good jun.” you give him a polite smile.
unbeknownst to both of you, the failure of a study group has creeped to a closer table. they knew that you two were friends but they still can’t help but eavesdrop. “will you two please shut up so we can hear them?” the annoyed face evident on sunghoon’s face at the bickering of sunoo and niki. he turns to see jay, snacking and not paying attention. he rolls his eyes at the group, his gaze then catching yeonjun leading you out of the shelves. quickly shushing the three and nodding his head in your direction again, they finally get the hint.
yeonjun steps in front of you, “so you know my friend soobin, right?”
“soobin… as in choi soobin?”
yeonjun flashes his bright smile, “that’s the one.”
“yeah i know him. we had a stats class together a while back. he definitely taught me a few tricks around a calculator.” you laugh with him, “he’s super sweet, and needless to say cute too.”
“well, am i glad to hear that! long story short, he’s kinda been crushing on you lately and wants to know if you’re free. he mentioned your shared class before but he said he never got your number.”
“since you have mine already, go ahead and give it to him. tell him i’m free whenever he is.”
yeonjun raises his eyebrows at your boldness, “will do. i just wanted to ask you first before i gave it to him because… y’know…”
“no worries, i completely understand.”
he gives a quick goodbye before going back to his desk. storming quickly, four faces appear in front of you, all a combination of confusion, shock, and anger. 
sunoo starts, “um… y/n. why are you telling yeonjun to give your number to another guy?”
“yeah, are you cheating on heeseung?” his partner in crime, sunghoon, joins in.
you pause and scan their faces. your face dawns an equally as confused expression. “how can i cheat on someone who isn’t my boyfriend?”
four jaws simultaneously drop. riki’s being the first to close and answer a bit hushed, “i knew it.”
jay turns to him in disbelief, “not the time, niki!”
“did heeseung not tell you guys?” you ask them slowly. “i assumed he would be the one to let you all know.”
“that you two broke up?!” sunoo asks angrily, being shushed by yeonjun from the counter. giving an apologetic smile then tuning back into your conversation, “what do you mean you two broke up?”
“we just… broke up. that’s it. end of story. now if you’ll excuse me, i have to actually study.”
they watch you check out the book you came in for originally and walk out the doors, unsure of what to do next.
Tumblr media
vi. the intervention
arranging your monthly movie night was not exactly the easiest task given the tensions surrounding two people in your group. so the only logical solution that they all could think of was to simply not to tell one of you that the other was coming over. a fool-proof plan.
in the dorm of the 02z, you did not expect to see heeseung when you walked in.
he gets up from his spot on the couch, “what the hell is going on here?”
“yeah, an explanation would be nice.” you cross your arms as you glare at the younger boys.
niki, trying to act as mediator gestures for both of you two sit on the loveseat—the same loveseat that was always reserved for the two of you before. “this is an intervention.”
after the confession of their intentions, everyone goes quiet. not a single word is spoken for several minutes, no one knowing how to start. after much internal contemplation, jungwon finally attempts to start. “we brought you two here today because- you know what, i can’t do this.” he stops and cuts himself off, burying his face in his hands.
sunoo sits next to him with his arms crossed. “how dare you two? our parents gets divorced and we don’t even get a notice.” it was common for them to refer to you and heeseung as the parents of the group, being the oldest. although something about sunoo still calling you by that nickname stings, him shaking his head to display his disappointment making you feel guilty. 
you see heeseung out of the corner of your eye avoiding looking up to your friends. “look, i don’t see the big deal. we broke up. that happens when relationships don’t work out.”
sunghoon quickly intervenes, “how can you say it isn’t a big deal? you’re letting three years go to waste and that’s all you can say? that’s what happens.” he scoffs at how shameless you come off.
“well, would you rather us stay together even when we were unhappy?” their reactions were a mix of shouts, the words yes, of course not, and duh all blending into each other.
that’s what brought your ex boyfriend out of his daze. “y/n has a point. we broke up and it’s over. we were no longer happy and i don’t see the point in bringing it up again either. it’s in the past. let it go.” he says rather coldly and sternly. him actually saying it and acknowledging it caused that weird feeling to come back. his body language is off, too. your years together has taught you enough about heeseung to know when he’s upset, especially with himself.
jake takes his turn, looking down at his fidgeting hands and muttering sadly, “but you promised each other forever.”
that prompts you and heeseung to glance at each other quickly, making eye contact and it lingering for a couple of seconds. you look away first, not noticing that his stare doesn’t leave you.”some promises just can’t be kept.” your response then making him turn away.
“bullshit.” it’s the first word uttered by jay this entire time. “neither of you are the type to break promises.”
“some things can’t be helped,” heeseung defends.
jay, getting angrier, asks his friend, “did you know that she’s already going on a date? yeah, that guy, soobin. i’m pretty sure you know who he is. your ex,” he makes sure to stress the last word with a certain degree of annoyance, “thinks he’s cute.”
emotionless, heeseung answers back, “good for her, then.”
you were sure that you were over him, that’s why you said yes to the date. but something about him not caring leaves you feeling odd.
jungwon stops your train of thought, “no, you’re supposed to be upset. you’re supposed to get jealous and confess you still want to be with her. you’re supposed to fight for her and be together.”
another quick glance between the two of you, lasting longer than the previous one. no words are said on his end, but you know exactly what he’s trying to say. “he doesn’t have to fight when i’m the one who ended it.” you knew him. you knew he couldn’t admit to the others his decision. after all, he wants to be a good role model even in his darkest times. he couldn’t crush their idea of love and you did what you had to do. you lied for his sake—and maybe even yours.
Tumblr media
vii. him
two months have passed since the breakup. there’s tension amongst the friend group, the six not wanting to pick sides between you and heeseung. they’re constantly going back and forth, like they’re walking on eggshells as to not bring up something that only happened with the other.
to get your mind off everything, you’ve found comfort in soobin. well, more accurately you’ve found comfort in between his sheets, or wherever you two decide for it to go down. that’s not to say the dates aren’t great. you’re not official and you both know that. your latest date, however, couldn’t help but feel weird.
the date was going pretty well. don’t get me wrong—soobin is a great guy. he’s sweet, caring, funny, and handsome. you have a lot in common like your taste in drinks and movies. maybe if you had met him first, you would’ve dated him… but you didn’t meet him first. you met heeseung first, and soobin isn’t heeseung.
you found yourself drifting from the conversation now and then, thinking about how heeseung would’ve been at that moment. you think back to his habits, particularly the way he raises his eyebrows whenever he’s excited or talking about something he’s passionate about. you always found it endearing. over the course of dinner, you are able to notice that soobin has some cute habits too, like him covering his face when he gets shy or puffing out his cheeks. but it still isn’t the same.
“you two deserve each other.”
soobin catches your attention again with that comment. “what?”
“you and heeseung. i know that look. don’t try to lie to me.”
“look, heeseung is my past, and i want it to stay that way.”
“do you really want it to stay that way, or are you just afraid of what could happen if you let him back into your present?”
you give him a teasing glare, “don’t get all philosophical with me. i just don’t think he and i can go back to how we were before.”
“what’s so bad about you two changing? obviously if it didn’t work out, you shouldn’t try to be what you were before.”
“can’t i just try with you?”
“as much as i would love for you to give me that chance, i can’t do that to you or to myself. it’s not fair.”
you hesitantly ask him, “but is it worth it?”
“that’s not my decision to make.”
Tumblr media
viii. her
now that you’re virtually not in his life, he seems to be looking for you everywhere. actually… rather than going out of his way to look for you, everything just reminds him of you. the jingles of the commercials you always sang along to, your favorite songs on the radio, the reruns of 90’s shows you always binged. hell, even when he was making ramen, he was reminded of how you would make his favorite for him every time he was stressed over an exam. he was sitting in the back of the lecture hall, trying so hard to stay awake for his 3 hour long class with the most boring professor on campus. he fought the urge to text you since it felt like second nature to rely on you to help cheer him up.
there was a particular night when it really hit him. reality smacked him in the face late one evening. heeseung was bored out of his mind, laying alone in bed, aimlessly browsing netflix to find something to watch. he thinks to himself y/n would’ve slammed this laptop closed and talked all night about random and obscure topics. he laughs to himself, reliving the memories. right then, it’s obvious. he misses her.
Tumblr media
ix. promises
the rain hitting your bedroom window had no help on your already gloomy mood. what did help was the bottle of soju- well more realistically, four bottles of soju. it was all the liquid courage you needed to call heeseung at three in the morning. 
you sat drowsily on the rug of your living room, your phone on speaker and placed in front of you as you stared out the dewy glass. you heard the phone ring seven times, ready to hang up until you heard his groggy voice come out from the other end. “hello? y/n, why are you up?”
you laugh softly and ask him, sounding loopy, “why are you up?”
“because you’re calling me. would you like to give me a reason why, and are you drunk?”
“maybe. anyways, you know… i was thinking. we broke a lot of promises and it hurts. i have to know that we’re not bad people. i have to keep at least one, right?”
heeseung groans but lets you ramble, knowing that you won’t stop until you’ve said it all, “go on…”
“we made a promise that if something was going on, if we were in a dark place, that we would talk to someone. well, if you couldn’t tell by now, i’m not in the best place. the first person i thought to talk to was you.”
“why me?”
“shhh… don’t ask questions. i know you’re tired so just stay on the phone and let me talk. ok?”
he goes quiet for a bit, sighing, “ok.”
“i miss you. i do. i don’t expect you to miss me but i just want to say it,” pausing to hiccup, “soobin helped me realize some things, saying some crap like we deserve each other.” you chuckle as you recall his words, “maybe he said it because bad people deserve bad people. maybe he said it because in our own fucked up lives, we’re the only ones who can understand each other. i did a lot of thinking and i’ve come to the conclusion that we don’t. because if we stay together, we can’t move on. we can’t grow. we can’t become good people, no matter how much we want it. that’s life. sometimes, no matter how much we want something, no matter how much we wish on stars or pray, some things just aren’t meant to be.”
“y/n, get some rest…”
“wait, i’m not done. you already can tell i’ve been drinking and to be honest i have been, for a while. i do it,” starting to choke up and sniffle, “because it helps me forget. even if it’s just for a minute that i can forget what happened, i’ll drink as much as it takes. i’ll grow out of it, eventually. i know i will, but for now… i have to do what i have to do. i’m sure you can relate.” you laugh again, getting more drowsy. you bring your legs up, hugging your knees. faintly, the sounds of heeseung’s snores play from your phone. you smile to yourself, “i wish you were here, singing me a lullaby. i don’t know when you fell asleep but goodnight. take care of yourself.”
cuddled up in his bed, heeseung hears you hang up. he lets you believe he didn’t hear what you said. he knows the reality of it all and the weight that you both are carrying. knowing that you won’t check your phone for the rest of the night, he sends you a quick text: bookstore, saturday, noon. goodnight.
as he turns off his phone to try to fall back asleep, he sees his reflection in the black screen. he sees his puffy, red eyes and his tear-stained cheeks. the end of it all is coming and finally, you two are ready for it.
Tumblr media
x. love song
seeing him in person is a good idea. clearing the air, letting it all out, getting closure. all good ideas, you hope. walking into the bookstore was a weird feeling. when you spot him sitting by the window, you quietly make your way over. he looks up at your new presence, his feet shuffling out of nervousness. you notice the glass of pear juice on the small coffee table in front of him, already half empty.
“hi,” he says like a whisper.
“hi,” you awkwardly respond. it’s unlike the two of you to not know how to start a conversation. you make your way onto the cushioned seat, letting yourself get comfortable to help ease the tension. you each avoid the other’s gaze, not knowing how to begin. you sigh and finally ask, “how have you been?”
“busy,” he says as he nods, “finally took up actual music lessons. thought it would be better to have someone who’s played piano and guitar professionally instead of trying to teach myself.”
you softly giggle, “that’s good. you’ve always loved music.”
“yeah… how about you?”
“same, busy. i got the t.a position i applied for like forever ago.”
“congrats! you still looking to become a teacher?”
“well, generally yeah. i was having my doubts before but i just fell back into it. finally being able to be there, present, and guiding others… that’s what i want.” you sit there across from him, watching him and taking it all in. the man in front of you is heeseung, but not the heeseung you knew. no, this is the better version of him. the version of him where he can focus on himself. the version of heeseung that’s glowing and happy and ready to take on the world. “so, look. there’s no easy or delicate way to put it but i think there are things we both need to get off our chests.”
“agreed. since it all happened—the fights, the breakups, the ambush interventions—we haven’t actually talked.”
“those interventions… they were silly but the guys did help me realize some things. we’re growing up. sure, i thought we had this plan of us graduating, getting married, having a family, settling down, growing old. we both wanted that type of life. sadly, it’s not what happened and we have to live with it.”
he lets out a chuckle, “heeseung and y/n: meant for each other and meant to be.”
“but not meant to last. what a bittersweet and poetic ending."
“it’s like people always say: right person, wrong time.”
“you know… you used to tell me that our love song was the soundtrack to the best life you could live.” you reach out and take his hand in yours, “i just,” pausing to take a deep breath and compose yourself, “i just want you to know… that if anything happens-”
he cuts you off with a quiet gasp, whispering your name with a shaky voice, “don’t.”
you shake your head and gently squeeze his hand, “if anything happens… if in the end, we don’t find our way back and it isn’t us, don’t think we ended on a bad note.” you drop your head as you chuckle lightly before continuing, “cause you were always on key.” you give him a small grin, trying your hardest to not make things worse by crying. “we were just playing different tunes.”
he pulls you in closer to him, placing his hands softly on your cheeks. “i always hated seeing you cry,” he says as he wipes away the tears on your face, not bothering about his own. he wraps his arms around you, holding you close for the last time. 
you stay there in his warmth, hearing him sniffle as he tries to hold back the falling tears. when you pull away, you tell him “i will always love you. maybe not in the way i thought i would but it’s still there.”
“maybe in our next life, it’ll be the right time.” with that, he leaves a kiss on your forehead, leaves the bookstore, and leaves your life. your duet that worked in perfect harmony now playing a beautiful cadence—two wandering artists, free to fill your own wretched worlds with new melodies, the bliss and tranquility of it all. the hope that maybe one day, you’ll be in each other’s lives again is enough.
182 notes · View notes
ragingbookdragon · 3 years
Text
Don't Bleed Me Then Push Me Away
Kyle Rayner x Batbrother One-Shot
Word Count: 2K Warnings: Explicit Language, Angst
Author's Note: Based off this ask about Batbro being a Lantern! Enjoy! -Thorne
**********************************************************************
He burst through the door leading out to the roof, one arm wrapped around the man’s back, the other slamming the door shut. Huffing, he set him against one of the overhead vents before hurrying back to the door, yanking something from his belt. He shoved it against the door frame, just at face height and clicked a button, watching a red-light flicker on.
Sprinting back over, he knelt in front of the man who was moaning lowly, pawing at his side; he grabbed the hand. “Kyle, babe, don’t.”
“It hurts,” he moaned, dropping his head; he tugged the jacket away from his side, eyes widening at the crimson blooming larger and larger. “Oh God, I’m gonna bleed out.” He looked up, meeting his eyes. “(Y/N), I’m bleeding out.”
(Y/N) shook his head. “You’re gonna be okay.” Pressing a finger to his ear, he shoved the other against Kyle’s side. “Black Ops to Batman, come in.”
I read you, Black Ops. What’s your status?
“Not good. Green Lantern’s down and I’m not looking too hot either.” A blast sounded from below, on one of the floors beneath them. “We’ve got incoming enemies from the lower floors.” (Y/N) craned his neck, peeking over the side of the building before ducking again. “Tanks are in the courtyard.”
I’m sending the Batplane to your position.
“Negative Batman, anti-aircraft missiles were spotted earlier.” He breathed heavily, mind working in overdrive as he tried to think of a plan, but nothing was coming to him. Kyle’s blood was warm underneath his fingers and with how wounded the Lantern was, not even his ring could heal his injury.
—ack Ops. Black Ops. (Y/N)!
He shook himself from his stupor. “I’m here.”
I’m sending the Batplane.
“You can’t!” he yelled. “It’ll get shot down!”
I’m willing to take that chance if I get you and Kyle out.
“Dad I—” another blast sounded, this time from the rooftop door and he spun, listening to the screams of the men who’d taken a C4 charge straight to the face. (Y/N) yanked out his side arm, dropping the few who managed to survive and come out. He pulled the trigger one more time but all it did was click. Empty. He started hyperventilating, unable to decide if Kyle needed his attention more or if he should worry about getting them to safety.
But where could he take them? They were on the rooftop surrounded by tanks and soldiers. There was nowhere to run. They were at the end of the line.
(Y/N) looked back at Kyle. Sweat dripped down his face, his black hair clinging to his forehead; he looked clammy and ready to pass out. He glanced down at their hands pressed together, Kyle’s atop (Y/N)’s, and his eyes widened. The power ring.
He grabbed Kyle’s hand. “Kyle, gimme your ring.”
“What?” the Lantern moaned weakly. “My ring?”
(Y/N) nodded, slipping it off; he put his hand to his mouth, yanking the strap with his teeth before biting the tip of the middle finger, tugging it off. He slipped the ring on his finger and waited. He swallowed thickly, muttering, “Come on. Come on. Come on.”
“(Y/N),” Kyle whispered, and he looked at his lover. “It’s not working.”
“It has to,” he retorted, tears stinging the corner of his eyes. “I don’t wanna die here.” He leaned forward, one hand coming up to clasp the side of Kyle’s neck, his thumb brushing his cheek as he pressed his forehead to the man’s. “I don’t want us to die here.”
Kyle swallowed, a ghost of a grin on his lips. “I love you, (Y/N).”
He shook his head. “No. Don’t say that now.”
“I don’t know if we’ll get another chance,” he countered, nosing the soldier. “If we die here, then I want you to know that I love you.”
(Y/N)’s jaw tightened. “We’re not dying. Not now. Not today.” A wave of power surged through him, crashing against his soul like a tidal wave. “I refuse to give in. I won’t.” he shut his eyes, focusing on the feeling of Kyle’s skin against his own. “I’ll get us to the other side.”
A flash of green light burst across the sky, followed by an other worldly voice. (Y/N) Wayne of Earth. You have the ability to protect the ones you care for without fear. Welcome to The Green Lantern Corps.
He opened his eyes, the suit of green flooding his vision; a breathless laugh passed his lips and he gazed at Kyle. “I told you.”
Kyle snorted pitifully. “Yeah, yeah.”
(Y/N) grinned. “How do I work this thing?”
“Anything you can think of. If you can will it, it’ll come to life.”
He stood, looking down at the soldiers in the distance. “Any qualms against killing?”
Kyle shook his head. “Rules have been rewritten. Lethal force against enemies of the Green Lanterns has been authorized.” He gasped, leaning down to the ground and (Y/N) held out his arms.
“You need medical attention.”
“I’ll be fine,” he wheezed, shaking his head. “Go.”
(Y/N) knelt. “I’m not taking any chances.” He looked around. “I know who to call.”
“Who?”
He leaned forward, pulling Kyle into his arms. “Try not to move.” (Y/N) stood to his feet, eyes directed to the sky as he shouted, “Supergirl!”
A rush of wind gusted over them, almost knocking him off his feet and he looked over, seeing her red cape billowing above them. “(Y/N)?” she questioned. “You’re a Green Lantern?”
“For the moment,” he answered, holding Kyle up. “I need you to get Kyle to the Batcave back in Gotham City. Now.”
She glanced at the wounded man. “Oh my God, what happened?”
“Mission gone bad,” (Y/N) said. “Kara, please. Hurry.”
Kara nodded, lowering down to take Kyle from (Y/N); he grasped at (Y/N)’s shoulders. “I’m not leaving you.”
He shook his head. “You need to get to a hospital, or you’ll die.” He smiled. “I can take care of this.” (Y/N) met Kara’s gaze. “Go.”
She took off, ignoring how Kyle screamed at her to take him back.
(Y/N) flew to the ledge, standing atop it, and a gun went off; he raised a hand, imagining an aegis and sparks flew when the bullet ricochet off the bright green shield. He felt a renewed sense of strength and took a single step off the ledge, raising his hands high above his head; and the soldiers along the ground all gaped in terror as thousands of glowing arrows appeared in the sky, all the sudden coming down in a fury of green hellfire.
***
Kyle came to with wide eyes, sitting straight up on the med bay bed, though it proved to be a terrible decision as pain swelled through his side and ebbed outwards every which way. He gripped his abdomen, hissing with displeasure.
“Hey, take it easy,” someone commanded, pressing a hand to his shoulder and he cocked his head up, Jason coming into focus beside him.
“(Y/N),” he blurted out. “Where’s (Y/N)?”
Jason shook his head. “He hasn’t come back yet.” Kyle’s face dropped and Jason was quick to reassure, “But he didn’t send the code-word, so we know he isn’t dead yet.”
“What?”
“We’ve got a code-word we’re only allowed to use if we know for certain we’re not going to make it.” Jason leveled Kyle with a firm stare. “(Y/N)’s still out there somewhere.”
Kyle shoved his arm off. “Then I need to be up helping.”
“With what? He’s got your ring.” Jason put his hand back on the other’s shoulder and this time pushed him back on the bed. “You just lay right here and recover. We’ll do everything.”
“I can’t just lie here, Jay,” he retorted, though he made no move to get up. “I need to help you.”
“(Y/N) would want you to rest,” Jason shot back, and Kyle scowled.
“Screw you for using him against me.”
He snickered. “I’m just saying what you know you should be doing.” Jason reached over, pressing a button, and Kyle felt the world slow down, his vision growing dark as sleep washed over him. “There you go. Let the morphine lull you back to sleep.”
“Gonna…kick your…ass,” Kyle slurred before his head dropped down, eyes slipping shut as his consciousness faded, Jason’s amused hum echoing in his ears.
***
Kyle liked to be touched. He found physical measures of affection just as important as verbal ones. And (Y/N) liked to touch. A hand on a thigh, a kiss on a temple, a finger looped through a belt-loop, a toe brushing an ankle, digits carding through hair; he was content to simply be in contact. His favorite way was to touch was when he and Kyle were laying in bed, the latter’s back pressed to (Y/N)’s chest, one of the soldier’s arms wrapped around the Lantern’s waist, the other arm under Kyle’s head, folded back so he could brush through his lover’s hair.
It was uniquely intimate and sweet at the same time, and (Y/N) would simply lie there, breathing in the scent of Kyle’s minty shampoo, brushing the dark strands until they felt like silk beneath his fingers. And Kyle would hum contently like a cat, grunting if (Y/N) stopped. On the rare cases that he did, the Lantern would pout like a child and turn over in (Y/N)’s arms, burying his face in the soldier’s throat, nose brushing his lover’s Adam’s apple, breath warm against his skin. (Y/N) would chuckle, the vibrations rumbling through Kyle as the soldier’s arms twisted, cocooning the Lantern to his chest, legs tangling like ribbon.
It’s the feeling that Kyle had at the very moment, and he blinked blearily, inhaling deeply as he forced his mind to rise above the sleep clouding his brain. The comforting scent of cedarwood and gun metal wafted up his nose, a hint of tobacco hidden within. Warmth spread across his body, hot air puffing against his temple, as he finally felt the pressure over the left side of his body.
He opened his eyes, seeing a familiar set of dog tags and he tried to jerk up when someone’s hand rested on his chest, a comforting deep voice murmuring, “Easy, babe.”
Tears stung Kyle’s eyes and he fumbled for the hand over his heart, clenching the fingers through his own as he whispered, “Fuck you.”
“Hmm,” (Y/N) chuckled lowly. “Wasn’t expecting that.”
“You sent me away,” he hissed, barely restraining the tears. “I thought you were going to die.”
“Not yet.” He retorted, kissing Kyle’s temple. “Go back to sleep.”
“No. I’m mad.”
“Mmm, no, you’re actually relived I’m back alive and spooning you on a crappy med bay bed.”
“Don’t try to change my mind,” Kyle shot back, trying to wiggle, but (Y/N) had him in a tight grip. “I want to yell at you.”
(Y/N) sighed and pulled away, gazing at the Lantern; Kyle opened his mouth to start berating him and he merely leaned forward, pressing a kiss to his lover’s lips. Kyle’s eyes went wide as he made a noise of complaint, but it quickly faded as heat flooded his system.
They pulled away and (Y/N) patted his cheek. “You can yell at me in the morning. Go to sleep.”
Kyle glared at him, though he let his head fall to (Y/N)’s shoulder. “I’m going to kick you in the crotch.”
“Yep.”
“And yell at you for leaving me.”
“Uh huh.”
“Mock me at your own peril, Wayne. I’ll fight you.”
“Ooo, I’m so scared of the green space ranger with fancy boots.”
“You are a major douche.”
(Y/N) nuzzled his head. “I know. You love me though.”
Kyle swallowed the lump in his throat, and he turned, burying his face in (Y/N)’s throat as he whispered, “Don’t ever send me away from you like that ever again.”
He smiled, carding his hand through the Lantern’s hair. “Never again.”
“Promise me.”
“I promise.” (Y/N) kissed Kyle’s head. “Go to sleep. I’m not going anywhere.”
192 notes · View notes
Text
I see you (Din Djarin x GN reader)
Summary: Din is hurting, don’t look at him. No REALLY, DON’T LOOK AT HIM.
Genre: Angst / fluff + hurt / comfort.
Author’s note: This takes place after the events of Chapter 15, therefore SPOILERS if you keep reading!
Of course, I don’t know what will ACTUALLY happens in the rest of the series, but in this version, Din + Reader + Grogu are safe on a spaceship after Those Events Happened in Ch14, and after THAT happened on Moskar in Ch15 (reader was present on Moskar). Din is dealing with some trauma following That Event.
I wrote this in one go in a tired yet enthusiastic frenzy after watching. I didn’t want to spend ages on it... but I hope that it’s coherent and that you like it!
Warnings: nightmares, angst but it turns out okay. Final warning: spoilers for S2 esp. chapter 14 and 15. Meant to be GN but not sure if the Mando’a confuses that. Pls forgive.
GIF: a non-chapter-specific adorable GIF so that I’m not spewing spoilers onto my dash. By @calsblueponcho​
Tumblr media
You hear him stir again. For the third night in a row.
You hear his groans start to build from within the cot opposite you - the sound wrung from his chest and strangled in his throat. You hear him thrashing, limbs and elbows and whatever part of him clunking against the walls of the narrow sleep space, the sounds tinny from within his metal box; like usual.
Metal between you and him.
Finally, you hear the shush of the door as he clambers out of bed, and you hear ragged breaths sawing in and out of him. You hear the weight of his blankets pool on to the floor as he throws them off with a grunt, and his bare feet making contact with the metal floor.
Now, his sounds are not tinny. They are organic. There are no layers of metal between you any longer. Now, only the darkness separates you from him. Only the darkness separates him from the knowledge you hold; that he is afraid.
You hold still. You stay quiet, as Din completes his now nightly ritual - as if the man needed any more rituals. Your heart breaks for him.
Each night now, he awakes in fear, and he throws off his blankets. You have no doubt that if you scooped them from the floor they would be warm and damp with sweat - the whole space is tinged with the odour of roused panic. Each night now, he shuffles hastily towards the foundling’s pram to see for himself that Grogu is safe and here, with him. As usual -you expect- the small child is sleeping soundly, despite what he has been through. Perhaps because of it. He knows now that no matter what happens, his father will keep him safe.
Each night now, as you lie in the dark, pretending to be asleep after his distress has awoken you, Din hovers over your bed for a moment, drawing in a gasp of a breath as if he might speak or plead for help; however, each night it is the same, and no words ever come. Each night he then breaks free of this hot, enclosing space and his suffocating sleep, and you hear his footsteps recede, heading in the direction of the cool, more open cockpit.
This time, though, when he tugs in a breath to speak, you do not pretend to be asleep.This man does not need any more rituals which hurt him, you think. You will help him to break this one.
“Din,” you breathe softly, turning your body towards where he stands, even though you cannot see him. Only because you cannot see him. There is no metal between him now, and you are determined not to look. 
Although he stays silent, you can guess at the tension in him. You can sense his stillness and hear his short, sharp breaths. If he was armoured, his pain would be sounding out. Gloves creaking around his balling fists, his clunky boots tapping agitatedly on the floor. Unarmoured, his pain is in stealth mode. Unarmoured, he is entirely more vulnerable to it. You imagine him stripped down -in all ways, unprotected- and your heart breaks for him.
You desperately want to lay your body over him; become his armour.
Din had almost lost it all, and even after what he had gotten back, he had still lost too much to bear.
He had done it all for the child.
It had been worth it.
But that didn’t mean it wasn’t heavy to bear. 
He still doesn’t speak, his pain in stealth mode, and so, you shift and swivel on your cot until you are sitting on the edge of it.
“Din,” you repeat, and your hand somehow finds his in the dark, your eyes deciphering the shifting shadows enough to reach for him, and immediately his fingers close tightly around yours, as if they had been searching for a hand to hold.
His hand is clammy, slick with panic.
“Did you have a nightmare?” You ask, not even venturing your gaze up towards his shrouded face, out of respect.You have nothing but respect for him.
“Yes,” he states, and even with one word his voice cuts through the dark and splits your chest like you have been struck with a spear of beskar. Because of the pain in it, yes. But also because there are no layers between you. No vocoder. No metal. His voice is warm and deep and robust like this, and it splits you apart. “Sorry. If I woke you.”
His fingers grip yours a little more tightly, but before you can return the favour, he quickly snatches his hand away. “Try and go back to sleep.”
“I couldn’t sleep anyway,” you lie. “Would you like some root tea? Maybe we can have a cup and both of us can try again.”
If Din finds you out in this lie he doesn’t let on. You’re a bad liar, and he’s a good judge of truth, so you suppose he can make whatever decision he pleases, this way. But, he merely makes a gruff sound of agreement. “I’ll get my helmet,” he states, and yet you find his hand again and give a gentle tug to stop him.
“It’s okay. Go sit in the cockpit, keep it dark. I’ll make some tea for us, and I won’t look.”
There is a beat, and then he makes another gruff sound of agreement before turning on his heels, efficiently swivelling towards the front of the ship.
You stand, and you take a moment to still the racing of your heart. You take your own gasp of air. You feel the pounding in your chest at this morsel of skin on skin. Your hand in his.
You exhale a long breath, and slowly, quietly, so as not to wake the child, you slip through the darkened ship until you reach the cramped ration store, heating and brewing some tea under a dimmed and hazy cooklight.
You hurry, as all you can think of is Din alone and unprotected, and how much you wish to guard his heart.
When you reach the cockpit, you enter with your eyes down, averted, looking anywhere but at him, and then you enter, a cup of sweet sleep tea in each hand. You can make out his silhouette in your periphery, and, silently, you slot yourself into the co-pilot’s seat beside him, extending the tea for him to take. His fingertips brush yours as he takes it, and you almost jolt and spill the contents.
You calm your breath again, and you allow the darkness to settle around you, a barrier between you and him. The only barrier between you and him, you can’t help but think.
“Thank you,” the Mandalorian states after a moment, his tone dull.
“Don’t thank me until you’ve tasted it,” you warn with a gentle attempt at a smile. “Couldn’t really see what I was doing.”
“No,” Din says, and this time, his hand finds yours in the dark, where it rests on the arm of the co-pilot’s seat.
There goes your heart pounding again.
“I mean... Thank you for looking out for me. And Grogu.”
Oh.
What else would you possibly do?
“Of course, Din, you’re my...” you cut yourself off before you complete the thought. Din is not your family. You’re not his riddur. Grogu is not your child. Even though that’s how it feels. Even though that’s what you want. “You’d do the same for me,” you say, reeling yourself in. That doesn’t sound quite right either, you fluster. To a bounty hunter that must sound transactional. Like he owes you a debt now.
You’re getting it all wrong.
And all you want to do is comfort him. Protect him.
“Din...?” you ask softly, your eyes fixed straight ahead, not looking at him, even though you are desperate to. Even though from the shapes in your periphery, and from the direction of his voice you can tell his head is angled towards you. Even though you feel like he is staring intently at you. Like he sees you, even in the dark.
“Yeah?”
A heat rises in you and you snatch your fingers away from his. Your hand had become clammy. Instead of this heat, you take a sip of your hot tea, both hands wrapped around the ceramic, earthenware vessel.
“You know,” you say, unsure why your voice is shaking. “It might help to talk about it, the nightmare... if you’d like to.”
You hope you haven’t overstepped. Din hasn’t had anyone to open to for a long-time before you, and you know he may not want to- however, he surprises you. 
“I feel selfish,” he states, his words coming to you immediately and freely as if he had been waiting for a kind ear to listen.
“What in the stars..?!” you exclaim, in a shocked whisper, your eyes intent on the night sky through the transparisteel as you summon the stars in your setiment. “You’re the least selfish person I’ve ever met, Din.”
He emits another gruff sound, but this time it is not in agreement.
His pain...
Sweet man.
You are desperate to turn your head towards him in this moment, but you never would. You would not look.
“I keep having this nightmare, as if it’s the worst thing,” Din continues, and you recognise guilt in his tone. “And it’s not about Grogu. It’s not about you and the child and keeping you both safe.”
Your heart thrums again, from the fact he mentions you and the child in the same breath; mentions you alongside his everything.
“What is it about?” you ask gently, your voice barely above a whisper.
Beside you, you hear Din take a long sip of tea, and you don’t rush his words. You have all the time in the world for him. 
“It’s... about my face,” he says solemnly, and even the mere mention of his face has your heart unsure whether it is breaking or racing.
You had known this would take a toll on him. You knew that having to show his face on Morak; to you, to the Imperials, to Mayfield, would haunt him. For a long time. You had tried not to look. You hadn’t looked. And yet, you had still seen him. You had seen him, only for a moment, before you could avert your eyes - hard as it was to look away. 
That moment, though, was long enough to burn the image of him like a brand behind your eyes. His hawkish nose, his brown mop of grizzled hair...
Brown eyes.
Brown eyes as kind as his soul.
He was beautiful, exactly as he was to you already. Exactly as he had been to you before you ever had a hint of what he looked like.
Still, as much as you fell in love with his face the instant you saw it, exactly like you fell in love with his soul the instant you knew it, you wished you could take that moment back. You didn’t want it; not like this. It felt like a violation to even look at him, so can’t imagine how violating it must have felt to be seen.
No wonder he was having nightmares.
Your heart was in pieces for him. How in the stars could he feel he was selfish? It wasn’t as though he needed to prove his love for Grogu, when he had done that to get him back. When he had given everything he held dear.
“I let the kid get taken. I barely got him back alive. You back alive. And I’m dreaming about showing my face. I should be worrying about him. Not myself.”
Only this man could think himself selfish for experiencing a trauma, you could swear.
“It was a trauma, Din,” you state sensitively. “It makes sense that you would have nightmares about it. And... maybe,” you muse. “Do you think it’s possible... you’re not dreaming about the kid because you know he’s safe now? You know he’s back home and we can protect him. But the thing plaguing you... is something that was taken from you. Something you can’t get back?”
You’ve thought about this. You’ve had time to think about every single thing which might have been bothering him and how you might fix it, these past nights. That has become your ritual. To care for him. To notice when he holds Grogu a little tighter, becomes more reluctant to let go of his hand. When he grumbles about the specs of this ship, compared to the Crest. When he waits extra late, until it’s extra dark to remove his helmet these days. When he wakes in the night thrashing and gasping for air.
You can’t change what happened, but you hope you can be there as he heals from it.
Din doesn’t respond rightaway, but he takes a sip of his tea, mulling your words over.
“Do you want to talk more about it?” you ask gently. “About what happened?”
And, Din eventually begins, in a deep, empty rumble, sounding like an engine low on fuel. “They scanned me,” he says, and you can tell from the change in his voice that he has turned away from you - is now looking down at the floor. In your periphery you see his figure hunched over, head hung like a bird.
You want to reach out for him, but you don’t. Not yet.
“It wasn’t only showing my face to them, to you,” he begins, and you have a bitter taste in your mouth not only from his trauma but also from the fact you were any part of it. “They scanned me. My face is in their system. My face is everywhere. In every imperial back-up, all across the galaxy. Not only did I violate the code, but my violation is infinite, eternal. They have my face.” Your face twists in agony on his behalf as he speaks. “You know, I keep waking up, in a panic. Like I did when Grogu was taken... except this time it’s me they stole. They really did steal all of me. I’m not fit to call myself a Mandalorian.”
Tentatively, you do reach out your hand to him now, and you set it on to his shoulder, feeling the subtle heat of his skin through the thin, still damp fabric. You rub small circles there, hoping you can soothe him even a tiny amount. You let his heavy words sink in, before you speak.
“Din, I’m so sorry this happened to you,” you soothe. “I know I can’t fix it. I wish I could. But you should know, that it’s okay to feel this way, and I’m here -and so is Grogu- and we’ll help you however we can.” You suck your lips in between your teeth as he is unresponsive, wondering whether to go on. You decide you must. That he must hear this. “And, Din,” you say, through a watery smile. “I hope it’s not inappropriate to say- you know The Way better than I ever can- but, it seems to me, from what you tell me, that being a Mandalorian isn’t any one thing. It’s strength, and honour, and loyalty. And if it’s those things too, then, Din, you’re the most Mandalorian person I’ve ever met.”
Beneath your hand, your feel Din’s chest stutter and he takes a shaky, volatile breath in and out. You wonder if he is crying.
“Cyar'ika” he says softly, after a few moments. “How do you always make me feel a little better? A little safer?”
Your heart pounds. He called you darling.
“It’s just the tea,” you dismiss, through brimming tears of joy. It is all you want. All you want to protect this sweet man.
“It’s not,” he states painly. “The tea’s awful,” he says, and this time, his hand clamps over yours on his shoulder. His chest shakes again, but this time it is with a gentle, shaky laugh. The kind of throaty, beautiful chuckle which sounds out of him when Grogu plays with the silver ball of the flight control. 
Yes, he settles his hand on top of yours, but, this time, neither of you snatch your hands away. His laugh subsides, until it dissipates into the space between you, warming the room a little.
“There is one more thing I’d like to talk about,” Din says, his voice cracking.
Softly, you invite him to continue with a squeeze of his shoulder.
“You saw me,” he says, gently, and you can tell his gaze has turned back to you, head pointed where he’s looking. You feel his eyes on you.
Brown eyes.
Now that you know what they look like, it is all the harder to avert your gaze.
You did. You saw him.
“I’m sorry,” you state, voice brittle, and your heart breaking, tears tipping from your eyes. “I wish I hadn’t. I wasn’t looking.”
Just like now. You won’t look.
“Yes, I know. But you saw me. You always see me,” he states, his voice warm and revving like an engine suddenly full with fuel. You shake your head softly in confusion, unsure where he is going with this, syllables stuttering out of you. Luckily, Din picks up the slack. “I hoped you would see me for the first time as my riddur, but, now that you have already... what do you think? Is mine a face you could live with?”
Your heart is pounding faster now. It is definitely racing, and no longer breaking.
As his riddur? He meant to marry you? Means to, still? Your brimming tears spill over on to your cheeks.
And, this time, you turn toward each other, even though your gaze is cast down. Not looking. His eyes very much fixed on you- on whatever he can make out in this shadow.
You think that having such kind, brown eyes fall on you is a blessing.
“Din,” you start, your voice full and bowed with emotion. “Yours is a face I loved before I ever saw it. Loved when I saw it. Will love if even if I never see it again, and would love if I looked at nothing else but into your eyes for the rest of my life. Your face is as beautiful as your soul, and I never needed to look at you to see you.”
“Cyar’ika,” he whispers softly, scooping up your hand and bringing it to rest on his cheek.
An impossibly joyous smile splits your face as you feel the texture of his skin and the scruff of his beard against your fingers. Finally. As you feel his own face crease into a smile in return, his cheek appling beneath your touch. You are overwhelmed by the trust he must place in you, to sit with you like this.
“Do you mean it, Din?” you ask, scarcely believing it. “You want to be a family?”
This time, Din’s voice does not come to you from behind metal - behind beskar. It is close. It is unfettered. You feel his warm, sweet breath on your face as his joyful, certain words filter out of him. “We’re already a family. You and me and the kid. I’m never letting anything take you away from me.”
You believe him.
You smooth the pads of your finger over his face and he reaches out to cup your cheek too, feeling the tracks of your tears beneath his touch. With his broad hands, skin-on-skin, Din pulls you into him, and your lips find his immediately, his tongue delving eagerly into you as if he has been waiting for a mouth to kiss.
Din has been waiting for a long time, perhaps. Waiting for you to complete his family - officially. But he’s never had to wait to love you. He already did that, long ago. From the first time he saw you, in fact. You had a face as beautiful as your soul, and he knew you were the one for him. 
You close your eyes, feeling overwhelmed by happiness. You do not look at him; your Mando. You don’t even try to, but you don’t need to look to see him.
Still, you if you get the chance to look again, you think it will be a blessing to gaze into those brown eyes.
Those brown eyes as kind as his soul, and full of love, instead of fear.
919 notes · View notes
tu-sugar-mami · 3 years
Text
It has always been you #2
You can read the first part here
Your wake up with a gasp, and with a lot of effort try to prop up on your elbow only to fall back on your side, grunting. Trying to stir your memories you clench your eyes shut.
The blood, the petals and tears. The feeling of being burned from the inside and the pain you felt in your throat as the thorns made their way out. All of it comes crashing to you in a second, making you dizzy.
A familiar voice catches your attention.
“You’re awake. Good. How are you feeling?” You look up to find your friend leaning on the doorframe holding a glass of water with a soft smile.
Your friend’s tranquil expression doesn’t show it, but they’re relieved. They hadn’t expected you to slump out of a portal. It's not that you appeared out of nowhere, since you made a habit of doing it every once in a while, but the fact that you opened a breach instead of snapping into existence that concerned them. As soon as your unconscious body fell on the floor with a hard thud your friend (whose name you don't know despite knowing each other from years but call Chips in honor of their love for said snack) was by your side checking on you.
Chips was worried sick, but didn't hesitate as they took you to the lab. As if luck would have it, your friend is a very talented healer and after many tortuous hours of medical practice (and a little bit of their own powers) they managed to stabilize you.
“I feel awful…” You tug the blanket up to your neck. Chips giggles.
“Well yeah, you had it bad, man. You’ve been out cold for three days.” Chips looks at you for a second longer before offering you the glass of water while helping you sit up before sitting themselves beside you on the bed. Their expression changes to a serious one while deciding if it’d be prudent ask. “What happened…?”
Your gaze is locked on the glass of water in your hands. You think back to the events and come to one conclusion. With a defeated sigh you respond. “I don’t know. One second i was on my way to Lady Beneviento’s workshop to deliver her afternoon tea and the next one i was on the floor coughing—” you sigh and rub the bridge of your nose with your fingers. “Coughing blood…”
“And flowers.” Chips added.
“And flowers…” You confirmed. “How do you know? I arrived here unconscious.”
“I did my homework, gremlin.” Chips couldn’t hold your gaze and they looked away. “Your lungs are filled with those.”
“My lungs?! How is that even possible?”
Chips stands and retrieves a book from the drawer on the bedside table. “I did some research as to what could possibly be the cause for such, uh… unique… condition. I found something in one of the books at the old library but i think you might want to read this for yourself…”
You’ve had a lot of questions, but nothing could have prepared you for the answers.
You can’t sleep, not even when night arises again. The contents of the book swirling in your mind like a cruel reminder.
‘Hanahaki Disease’ it read, ‘the victim of this infection is known to have flowers growing in their lungs leading to them coughing up flower petals when they suffer from strong one-sided love. There isn’t a cure to this disease other than to have their love reciprocated or by having surgical intervention, though this last option will cause the victim to lose all capacity to love again. If not treated, this disease will end up with the life of the victim.’
Chips makes a point of telling you that your state is grave and you need to make a decision before it’s too late. You don’t have much time, after all.
‘Coughing flowers means that my love is not requited’ is the thought that loops in your mind over and over again while you lie restlessly on the bed. Donna doesn't love you but you can't stop yourself from loving her.
You remember Donna’s shy smile. You remember her sweet voice. You remember her hesitant but lingering touch whenever your hands bumped, by accident of course.
Angie's words hurt you, because you learned she's connected with the Lady's thoughts, she's a part of her. It hurt you because your love was clearly, shatteringly not reciprocated. It stung because you fell for someone with absolutely no interest in you, much less the same way you were interested in her.
You had tried to push Lady Beneviento away in hopes that you could forget about those strong feelings, and it didn’t matter how much it pained you, you kept going. You convinced yourself that it was for the better, as Donna wouldn’t feel uncomfortable with your affections and you wouldn’t find yourself imagining impossible things. You made sure to avoid her at all cost and only address her if absolutely necessary. Keeping your mind distracted was an everyday thing, but you failed to realize just how much your behavior affected the Lady.
It was a few days before ‘the flower incident’ that you had decided it was time for your vacations to be over, but alas, things never go according to plan and now you’re laying on your friend’s bed while recovering from your poor decisions.
It’s Friday when you finally call Chips and discuss the next step in your progressive disease.
Meanwhile, back at the Beneviento Estate the Lady of the house is having her own turmoil of emotions. After the events where you made a full display of your particular ability, she doesn’t know what to think. First of all, you had supernatural powers? And not only that, but to open time-space breaches! That meant you could have left at any time you pleased without her being able to prevent it and yet you decided to stay with her all that time. Her heart aches, she feels relieved that you thought she was worth staying,  but on the other hand she is hurt that you hadn’t trust her enough to reveal your secret… but then again,  she didn’t tell you hers until fairly recently. And then you left her behind without any explanation! Not that she needed one but it would have been nice to get a chance to properly talk with you like she intended.
Still, Donna is worried about you. She’s waited for a long time now and still no sign of your presence. She waited for hours after you disappeared but you didn’t return that day. Or the next. You didn’t show up even after a month and a half had already passed by and Donna begun to think that you would never return and that your time together was finally over.
Until one day where the Lady is reading your favorite book (or more like the highlights you marked on the paper, remembering the eagerness in your voice whenever you read out loud to her a new line that you liked) when the sound of someone knocking on the door pulls her out of her pensive state.
As the door opens she finds, with disbelief in her eyes, that you stand on the other side, unable to meet her gaze.
Donna’s sight becomes blurry with tears and she can’t help but to tackle you in a tight embrace, holding you impossibly close while burying her face in the crook of your neck and inhaling your familiar scent after it being denied to her for so long.
“You’re back…”She says breathlessly and you can feel her hot tears wetting your shirt, her hands clutching the fabric of your clothes for dear life. A lot of questions run through her mind but right now she just wants to savor the feeling of your body in her arms again. There will be time for answers later.
“Lady Beneviento, please forgive me for leaving like that…” You don’t hug the Lady back but do let her hang off you until she’s sure you won’t suddenly disappear again.
“I’m so glad you’re here,” Donna says. “You don’t know how much i’ve missed you.”
“I’m back and ready to continue with my duties. If you’ll excuse me…” You step back from her hug before making a beeline for the kitchen without looking back, leaving a very confused Lady behind to look at your retreating back.
Donna’s eyes widen as she notices the almost imperceptible specks of blood marring the back of your shirt and she swears that under that oversized shirt you’re wearing are bandages covering you…
146 notes · View notes
shreddedparchment · 3 years
Text
A Wife for Thor Pt.19
The True Heir
03/09/2021
Pairing: King!Thor x Reader          Word Count: 5,781
Warnings: angst, depression, pregnancy, marital troubles, pining
A/N: There is very little editing. Forgive me. I’m sleepy. I’ve been up writing all night. I’ve also been hurting, but it’s all good! I’m so happy to get this chapter out. *insert evil laugh* If you happen to reblog, thank you so much for helping me spread my work! it truly means so much, more than you know. xoxo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Sunday
Today you do nothing.
You’d opened up your laptop last night and attempted to scribble a few lines for your next book, but all you could think about was Thor, Jane, the babies to come, and where exactly you fit amongst all of it.
After typing Thor’s name along with a few other random words for the tenth time, you gave up and shut the laptop. You’d crawled into bed, bundled up under your fluffy comforter, and bid goodbye to the world as you caved in to unconsciousness.
The fact that morning is here, you find that your hope for today to be better than  yesterday was silly. How can anything ever be good again?
You place your hands on your lower tummy, caressing what feels like a very slight swell. It’s just barely harder than the rest of your stomach. Firm. Despite the happiness that your baby brings you, you stare across the room at your computer and can’t find it in you to get up and work.
Instead you roll over onto your other side and pull Thor’s--that is to say, the one he’d used while he was here--pillow over to cling to.
Thor’s texts are also still fresh in your mind.
Sleep didn’t dull their effect on you or the confusion they raised.
Did they mean that he wouldn’t get an annulment? That’s sorta what you were getting from them. His declarations that he couldn’t live without you and that he would die for you and that he missed you so much at his side sounded like he was also telling himself how he felt. As if he were, not so much convincing, but reaffirming what he already knew.
You reach over and switch your phone on, clicking through to your messages to find that Thor must have stolen his phone back from Loki at some point.
Thor: Good morning, my cherub. I hope you slept well.
Thor: I could hardly sleep with you absent beside me.
Thor: Our bed is too big without you in it.
Thor: Have you seen the doctor yet? You’ll text me as soon as you get a diagnosis, won’t you? I’ll be waiting.
Thor: Loki insists that I give you some distance to rest but being apart from you is torture.
Thor: Would you be very angry with me if I came to see you?
Thor: I have some things I must deal with here before I can go though. Loki is right. I should allow you rest and fix things here before I come to you.
Thor: Are you still sleeping, cherub? I’m sorry if my messages are disturbing you. I haven’t gone this long without talking to you since...I wish I’d met you years ago. When things weren’t so complicated.
Thor: Would you have let me court you even though I am the God of Thunder? Future King of Asgard? Would you have married me when I came back with my people to live here on Earth?
Thor: I think if I had to choose all over again, you’re still the only woman equal to the task of being my Queen.
Thor: And the love that has grown between us is...I will never take it for granted…
As you read that last message, you assume he wants to say he won’t take it for granted again. He’s already let it slip through his fingers, although he doesn’t know it yet.
Thor: Perhaps this can be that break you were talking of. For our baby? Maybe we do need a little bit of relaxation to let our bodies recover?
Thor: And yet, I can’t wait to start a family with you, cherub.
You’re bawling all over again, your eyes flooding with tears as you bury your face into his pillow and sob loudly.
He’d said that he missed your body next to his. You can relate. You want to feel the heavy fall of his chest, the deep breaths that fill his lungs and escape through his lips in a quiet little snore that always makes you cuddle into his side.
Normally, he’d respond by turning to face you and holding you right up against his chest.
The comfort that simple thing would give you right now when your heart is aching so painfully is what you so desperately need. But...you’re so angry too. You don’t want him near you.
The images that flood your mind are torture. Mixtures of pleasant, happy moments now marred by the betrayal and anger that has taken hold of your heart.
You bury your face into the pillow and scream until your throat really does go hoarse. Frustration at the force of change you’ve had to make in the past twenty-four hours.
You’re startled back to the present when your phone rings. You make a small attempt  to clear your throat then answer and the absolute gravel voice you use settles any wondering as to whether your illness is real.
“Hello?” you whisper, clearing your throat to no avail.
“Oh, cherub, you sound terrible.”
Your heart panics. How are you supposed to talk to him?
You don’t want to talk to him.
“I can’t really talk,” you say weakly hoping he’ll take the hint.
“Did the doctor see you already?” Thor asks, his worry evident in the quiet tone of his voice.
“Yes, he gave me some medicine and told me to try not to talk,” you lie, surprisingly easy right now since you don’t want to talk.
For your emotional sanity, you need to hang up soon.
“I’m so sorry, love. I wish I could take this illness from you. Where’s David? I’d like to talk to him.”
You panic again, floundering as you cough and clear your throat to buy some time.
“He’s not here. He went to the store to get some groceries,” you hope he buys it.
“I’ll call him a little later then. If you need anything, let me know. I’ll get it for you.”
“Thanks, Thor,” you mumble, suddenly not wanting to hang up.
How can one person give you so much ease and worry all at once? How can he be your source of agony and comfort at the same time? It’s not fair.
“I have so much to tell you, but...now is not the right time. You need to get better first.”
Nevermind! Fuck this guy. Your heart sinks.
“I have to go,” you tell him, hoping he’ll just hang up and leave you be now.
“Very well. I love you, cherub.”
How do you answer him without giving anything away just yet?
“Me too,” you choose. And it’s true.
Even if he’s torn your heart into pieces, he’s still the father of your baby and you still love him.
Whatever madness overcame him when he’d suggested to Loki getting an annulment was the best course of action seems to have passed. Loki must be right about him.
“Bye, Thor,” you whimper.
“Bye, Y/N,” he says your name, making your heart quake a bit.
You hang up and quickly dial up David.
He answers after two rings.
“Hello? How is my favorite girl in the whole wide world?”
He sounds amused by something, or just happy. It’s such a difference to how you feel at the moment that it breaks you and you sob again, renewing your tears.
“Y/N? What’s the matter?” David demands, clearly now beginning to fret over the way you sound.
You tell him everything. Somehow you manage to get it all out minus one important detail and when you’re done recounting the most horrible night of your life, David sighs heavily and you can almost picture him settling into a deep armchair with massive worry weighing on his shoulders.
“Well, the good thing is, if he goes through with an annulment, you’re to be given a monthly allowance for the rest of your life. It was a condition in your contract, should Thor change his mind about marrying you. But he didn’t so it was moot, until now. You will be a very rich woman. More so than the small fortune you originally inherited.
“I know that money is hardly a consolation for the man that you love-” David sighs again. “Perhaps he said it in madness? He must have been very upset. Caught by surprise?” David offers.
“Even if he doesn’t mean it or doesn’t go through with it, I know that for you the point is the thought was there.
“However, I do think we must make allowances for Thor. I’m sorry to say. He is a king and he’s responsible for his entire people. A baby would give them security. Stability. A legitimate heir would tie them to Earth forever.
“We musn’t make light of his choices. This isn’t a common situation to find one’s self in. For either of you.”
“David, I’m pregnant.” You finally explain, knowing that it will maybe just show him a little bit more of what you’re facing. “I went to tell Thor and that’s when I overheard them.”
For a moment he’s speechless. When he speaks again, his voice is heightened.
“Congratulations! I-I knew it would happen eventually. The timing is a little-”
“I haven’t told him yet, clearly.”
Silence again. “Why?”
“I don’t know. I was so happy when I went to tell him and then I heard their conversation and I-I just can’t find the strength to do it right now. Not until I know whether he wants the annulment.”
David breathes in deeply and then exhales slowly into the phone. His breath is light and soft.
“You’re afraid that he will only stay with you because of the child,” a statement.
David knows you better than anyone else in your life. It’s not surprising that he’d make the leap so quickly.
“He’s willing to leave me and marry Jane because of her baby. It’s possible that he’ll stay by my side only because of our baby and I’d rather he do what’s best for our people than to stay with me because of a sense of obligation.”
“It could be that Jane will not want him. She might keep her child away from the Asgardian royal court. Didn’t she refuse to marry him because she didn’t want to be Queen?” David’s voice is pensive. “This might all feel much larger than it is. I suggest you take some time to really think through your actions before making any decisions.”
“I’m not going to never tell him, David. He’s the father of my child. He has to know that he has two and not just the one. I don’t think I could do that to him. I could never keep him from his children.
“Either of them.”
“You are magnanimous, Y/N. More than even I thought you were capable of.”
“Bullshit. I ran away and am refusing to see him until I get my week of space,” you nod firmly. “But David-?”
“Tell me,” he urges you, recognizing your tone of anguish.
“I-I know that I accepted this marriage hesitantly. It wasn’t like I asked for it and you know how I felt before Thor asked me to marry him. You know how s-scared I was about marrying someone who was in love with someone else, and now...now he’s-”
“He’s married to you, Y/N. Not Ms. Foster. And from what I have been able to see, he does love you. Not Jane. This is a temporary setback. If you’re angry at him, be angry at him. Don’t pretend you aren’t. If you’re hurt, show it. Wear your heart on your sleeve.
“Loving someone is one of life’s greatest blessings. Sometimes that love doesn’t last, sometimes it takes a beating. But you must choose whether your love is worth fighting for.
“You’ve also got obligations that you cannot escape from. Duties to your people as their Queen.”
“Assuming Thor doesn’t leave me and take my crown,” you scoff.
“I’m with your brother-in-law. I don’t think it will come to that. I think Thor was a little shocked and thrown by Ms. Foster’s news. Now that he has had some time to think, I believe he’ll do right by you and when you tell him, your child.”
“I won’t tell him until he makes up his mind,” you insist.
“That is your prerogative. Do what you need to. What can I do to help? What do you need from me?”
“Just be prepared for any eventuality. I’m not sure what’s going to happen at the end of this week. Oh, and if Thor calls you--just make something up and tell me what you say. He thinks you drove me from the airport and have been staying with me.”
“Using me as your alibi so that your husband won’t come looking for you,” David clicks his tongue. “How much detail shall I give him?”
“You’ve got a job too, just tell him you’re coming and going. Tony had his staff install some security on the house after the honeymoon. I’m safe here. He’ll believe that I’m safe if that’s all you say.
“Anyway, I need to go. I have two more calls to make before I can relax and enjoy my break from the throne.”
“If you need anything, you know how to reach me. Anything, Y/N. I mean it.”
“Thanks, David. I can always count on you,” you smile.
Just a tiny one. A very subtle curve at the corners of your lips.
“Well, you do pay me,” he jokes, which actually pulls a small laugh from you.
“Right. Bye, David.”
“Goodbye, Your Majesty.”
You take only a minute to think about your conversation with David before you make the most important calls of your week in solitude.
The first one is simple. Just a reminder of doctor-patient confidentiality. He understands what you’re saying even if he doesn’t practice by that mentality.
Dr. Wilson’s phone call is more difficult. She wants an explanation. She wants to know why she’s not allowed to tell your husband, the King of New Asgard, that he’s finally got what you and he have been wanting.
An heir!
It’s painful to talk about but you tell her what’s happened. You tell her that Thor doesn’t know that you know about Jane’s baby.
She’s very quiet as you talk. She assumes things and you can hear her anger when she starts to ask for what she can tell Thor.
“He didn’t cheat on me, Dr. Wilson,” you explain, hoping that this will ease her anger.
You’re angry at Thor because of the annulment, not because he and Jane have created a life from their love. You’re hurt because he’s willing or was willing--you’re not sure yet--to leave you to be with Jane, even if not for love but for the baby growing within her.
You’re hurt because the man you love was choosing his duty over his feelings for you.
Even though you know that he’s right to do it. Even though you know that you should understand because he’s King and you also took an oath to put the people of New Asgard first.
It’s your duty to put their well-being before your own. That doesn’t mean you have to like it.
In Thor’s mind, his only duty is to his child. Jane’s child. He doesn’t know you’re carrying one of your own yet. Even though that would probably make sure that he stays with you because of the baby, you don’t want that to be the reason he stays.
Proud fool.
“Thor slept with Jane the same night he proposed to me. This was before we loved each other, when leaving Jane was the hardest thing he’d had to do. I don’t hold that against him.”
You don’t tell her about the annulment. She doesn’t need to know how messy this all is.
“He’ll probably call for you and Dr. Alric soon. Loki suggested they get Jane checked so act surprised? But please don’t tell him I’m pregnant. Not yet. He’s coming to see me at the end of the week and I’ll tell him myself then. Please?” And it really is a genuine plea.
“I’ll do whatever you need, Your Majesty. I would like to come and check on you. You don’t sound well.”
She’s very sweet and her concern is touching.
“Thor will probably send you to me eventually. He’s worried but he’s clearly got other things on his mind.”
“I’ll make arrangements to head over there tomorrow. Oh, can you hold for one minute Your Majesty? I’m so sorry.”
“Of course.”
There’s silence on the phone for a few minutes before she comes back.
“It was His Majesty. He’s told me about Jane but she’s not available for an examination until later in the week. So, he’s asked me to come to you first. I’ll be there tonight.”
For some reason, the idea of having her with you eases some of the stress you’ve been carrying with you since yesterday.
“I’ll call and have a car sent for you.”
“Actually, His Majesty has promised to bring me straight to you via bifrost.”
“Wait, what?” You sit up in bed, clutching your blanket to your chest as your nerves suddenly fray and panic begins to build up within you.
“Should I come by plane?” She asks, worried by the sound of your voice.
You can’t see Thor. No. You can’t.
“No. I’ll just be going out later tonight to pick up a few things that I need here at the house. Toilet paper, napkins, laundry soap. I just didn’t want you to get here when I was out, but I’ll text you the passcode to get in.”
You’ll just have to make sure that you’re not at home when they come. That’s what you’ll do. This is a perfect excuse to be out since you need to get the stuff you listed anyway.
“Are you sure you wouldn’t just like me to come by plane?”
“No, really. The sooner you get here, the better. The car ride is so long from the airport. I’ll see you tonight, Dr. Wilson.”
“Bye, Your Majesty.”
Even though you know that you have hours upon hours until Thor brings Dr. Wilson here, you force yourself out of bed and abandon your plans to wallow in your feelings so that you can shower, get dressed, and leave the house.
If Thor’s coming, you’re going to be as far away from your house as you can be. You’re not ready to see him again just yet. You only have small errands to run but you’re gonna stay out all damn day if it’s the last thing you do.
~~~~~~~~~~
Tuesday
Thor is at a loss. Completely and utterly lost without you.
If he was ever in doubt as to how he really felt about you--which he never has been because he knows himself well enough to know better--he knows now that you are the light of his new life here on Earth.
His reign would mean significantly less without you at his side.
Even though the time you’ve spent together has been a short few months, they have been the best months of his life.
If he’d had one of those other women he’d interviewed become his Queen, this life he’s chosen to lead would have felt empty and tedious. Instead of watching his Queen spend her time with his people leading the way in progress.
You’re so eager to be part of the Asgardian populace. They’ve embraced you so fully.
With a sigh, Thor leans forward and buries his face into his hands as he mentally trashes himself for the absolute fool that he’s been about this entire situation.
The fact that he’d even entertained the thought of leaving you.
He wants to cry and tear his hair out in frustration.
Should he tell you that the thought was weighed along with many others at Jane’s news?
And Jane.
Thor groans.
She’s been avoiding him since she told him. He can’t exactly blame her for it. He hadn’t exactly taken the news well.
He had no reason to expect her to be receptive to him after he’d basically accused her of being confused about it. She knew her own body. If she said she was pregnant, what reason would he have to doubt her?
He’s messed everything up so much and he’s terrified to tell you about Jane.
What if you have the same idea he did? What if you decide to leave him in some foolish attempt to have him marry her and legitimize his future child?
It’s something you would do. Sacrifice yourself so that he could do the right thing.
The thought of living this life of rule without you at his side is unbearable.
With another frustrated groan, he gets up and moves to pace the length of the room, ignoring the large pile of paperwork on his desk as his mind moves in circles.
It always comes back to you.
And then you’d been out when he’d gone to drop off Dr. Wilson. He hadn’t expected you to be gone. He’d wanted to see you. To hold you. Touch you. Hear your voice after so much turmoil.
You are his only solace.
Going so close to you and not seeing you has left him with a terrible pain in his chest.
His phone rings.
Thor dives for his phone and fumbles with it as he grabs it off the bed. He almost loses it over the opposite edge.
He literally throws himself towards it and lands with a grunt onto the bed as he catches it.
He presses the button on the screen without looking to see who it is because he only wants it to be you.
“Cherub?” he gasps, his voice an octave higher than normal with the little bit of exertion he just underwent.
“Oh, no. Sorry, Your Majesty, it’s Dr. Wilson. I was just calling to give you your daily report on Her Majesty’s health.”
“Oh, yes, of course. I’m sorry. I just haven’t heard from-” He clears his throat, sits up, and slides to the edge of the bed. “No matter. How is my Queen, doctor?”
“She was asleep. But just woke up. She’s very tired. Her throat is better, but she’s had a fever every morning since Sunday.”
Thor sits up straighter, hand clenched into a fist around the edge of the bed as his heart starts to thrum loudly.
“Is she seriously ill?”
“No, of course not, Your Majesty. But she really does need rest. She has been under severe stress and I’m sorry to say that your constant messages are not letting her rest.”
Thor’s heart drops and buries itself into a hole at the bottom of his stomach. He feels numb suddenly, fearful of what he might be doing to you. The guilt of what he knows he must tell you soon also weighs down on him.
“Are you saying that I should leave her be until she is recovered?” Thor checks, just in case he’s not understanding correctly.
“I’m saying that if you want her to get well quickly, you must give her what she asked you for. She needs rest.”
Thor hates that he can’t be there to check on you. He wants to feel you close. He wants to see you. What if you’re deathly ill and you’re telling Dr. Wilson to lie for you?
You abhor lies and cherish honesty , but he can see you lying in order to spare him pain. Just as he is lying to spare you the worry of all this uncertainty with Jane.
Although he knows that he can never lose you now and even with a child coming with Jane, you are his wife and he can’t leave you. He was stupid to think he could even try. The thought was a sin and he’ll never forgive himself for thinking it.
Loki was so angry with him.
Rightfully so.
The good thing is that you’ll never know how bleak things looked. At least he has found his sanity again.
“Will you keep me informed? I’ll stop contacting her if you will promise to tell me how she fares. If she gets worse, I want to know.” Thor insists, his voice passionate and begging.
“You have my word, Your Majesty. Have you heard anything from Ms. Foster? Do we know exactly when we’ll be running her tests?”
“She’s very busy. As of now, it’s looking more and more likely that we won’t be able to find the time until the week’s end. After we confirm her pregnancy, I’ll tell Y/N. I’m sorry that I’ve asked you to collude in this business.”
There’s a long pause and for a moment Thor thinks that maybe the phone has disconnected but then Dr. Wilson sighs, “I cannot wait for this week to be over. Will you come back for me then? When she’s ready?”
“Yes. I’ll pick you up in the same spot that I left you. My wife wasn’t too upset about her lawn, was she? Only, Stark seems to get irritated with me every time I land on his.”
“No,” Dr. Wilson chuckles once. “She was not upset. Again, there’s little more than her throat, head, and fever on her mind. I’ve gotta go. She’s gone out into the garden for some fresh air but I need to get her back into bed.”
“Please take good care of her, doctor. She’s...well, she’s my wife,” Thor finishes heavily.
The phone goes dead and Thor sits there staring at his phone until he can find the strength to get to his feet and go off in search of Jane. They really need to talk.
~~~~~~~~~~
Friday
Thor is upset.
He’s beyond frustrated by now.
He’s irritated.
It’s a week tomorrow since he’s seen you and he can’t stand the distance anymore.
Dr. Wilson snuck him a photo but you’d been sitting on your sofa, looking weak and withdrawn.
He’s not sure what exactly is making you sick, but he knows that he can’t go another day without seeing you.
He needs to get Dr. Wilson back here and he needs to get confirmation so that he can have something to tell you once he sees you.
He won’t lose you over this.
It was one last time. One final goodbye with Jane and he’d thought she was on her birth control but apparently she hadn’t been so he hadn’t bothered to protect himself from the possibility of getting her pregnant.
Why hadn’t she said anything?! Why hadn’t she told him that she wasn’t on her pill?
He knows it’s wrong to blame her. It took both of them to make this baby, but being away from you for so long is wearing thin and he’s losing all semblance of patience.
It takes some very careful maneuvering. Heimdall is sent first, then Hilde, then Loki.
None of them know why they’re going in to corner Jane in the tower except for Loki. Well, Heimdall knows, but there’s no hiding much from Heimdall. He pretends not to know and that’s good enough for Thor.
Loki is just stepping out of the tower when he turns to look at Thor with a grave almost exhausted expression.
“She’s up there,” he assures Thor, frowning as he shuts the heavy door. “When will this end, Thor? Are you going to keep the Queen away forever?”
Thor says nothing, he’s too upset to speak. He pulls the door open roughly and stomps his way up the steps taking them two at a time until he’s standing on the top floor landing.
He can see Jane biting her lip, pacing the length of the room until she turns and finally sees him.
“Thor…” she gasps, not expecting to see him.
“We have to talk, Jane.”
She looks away, turning her back on him then moves towards her laptop which she carefully closes. She puts her hand up to her throat and turns to face him.
“I will have Dr. Wilson brought in and Dr. Alric to give you the same tests they have been giving Y/N. They will be confirming your pregnancy and once we have that, then we can all sit down and figure out-”
“I’m not pregnant,” Jane gasps, her voice filling the room despite the quiet breath that escapes her pink lips.
Thor’s stomach twists. It’s agony.
On the one hand, the words she’s just spoken are...they’re a celebration. They’re simplicity. They’re peace and a return back to normal where in his life there is only you.
On the other hand, he’s just lost a baby he never had. An heir that he’d been expecting and now can never get back.
He’d made plans for this child. He’s pictured his life with them, the happiness and joy that their birth would bring to the people of New Asgard. The assurance that they would always belong to Earth.
He’d picked names for boys and girls. He’d begun to make a list of nursery items they would need even as he lamented that the baby was not yours but Jane’s.
This baby would have, and had already begun to change his life.
And now this?!
“What?” he very nearly spits.
Jane is so flustered she’s wringing her hands hard, welting them red.
“I’m...I didn’t expect to come here and see you with her and see how fast you just-” she waves her hand as if shooing away some animal. “-moved on. It’s like you were never with me.
“You were both so happy and talking about the future and I just lost it for a little bit,” she shrugs. “I have no excuses, Thor. I’m sorry if what I said hurt you. It was selfish of me and I just loved you for so long. You were mine, you know? And now you’re married, planning to have kids, and your wife is so nice and considerate and even though she has every reason to hate me, she was polite and so damn perfect…
“I’m not afraid to say that it made me hate her. I’m ashamed of it, but not enough to take it back.”
The silence is thick. The air suddenly grows charged and Thor’s eyes shine a bright sparkling blue.
His hands crackle and his eye spits as if full of blue fire.
The sky overhead thunders and the world shakes with the boom. The lightning strikes sharp and fast, shaking the tower so that for a moment, Thor can see how Jane thinks it might topple.
His anger gives way to betrayal and his lightning fizzles out as he takes a step towards her, his brow furrowed, eye full of pain as he stares at her, searching for the joke that this must be.
There is no way that this is really happening.
“You lied to me?” Thor accuses.
Jane blanches, her lips going pale as she takes a step towards him.
“I-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to lie, I just-I didn’t want to see you with her anymore and I wasn’t thinking straight so I just said it before I could stop myself. I know that it was wrong and I didn’t think it would go on for so long. I wanted to tell you almost as soon as I said it that it wasn’t true, but then you just took off and then the Queen left and I wasn’t sure if you told her and maybe that’s why she wasn’t here.”
Thor shakes his head, turning away from her as he paces towards the stairs but then turns back, his anger returning but full of pain now.
“I defended you. When Loki insisted I have you tested I asked him if he doubted you and I assured him that you would not lie about something this important. What reason would you have to lie?” he demands, almost of himself instead of Jane.
“Thor,” Jane begins.
“How long were you going to let me think you were carrying my child? How long were you planning to con me?” he accuses and his words seem to hurt Jane.
Thor can’t find it in him to care too much.
“I wasn’t-that’s not what I meant to do, Thor. Please, you have to believe me. I just didn’t know how much seeing you with her would-”
“You have no right to be upset!” he booms, his voice loud and it startles Jane quiet.
She’s never heard him angry like this. She’s never heard his voice raised.
“I gave you every opportunity to be with me, to marry me, to build a life here with me and be my Queen. You didn’t want it! You flat-out refused to be tied down by me and this Kingdom but now that you see me and my wife happy, you change your mind?
“You have the audacity to raise obstacles between us because you have regrets?”
“Thor,” she tries again, but Thor won’t let her speak.
“Get out,” he says sternly, turning to move towards the stairs.
“What?!”
“I said, get out. You are no longer welcome in my home. Pray no one ever finds out of your treachery. And should you have the urge to return for any reason, don’t.”
Thor storms down the steps, so angry that each step shakes the tower.
He’s breathing heavily as he slams the door shut behind him.
The storm air helps to calm him a bit. It clears his mind at least and the past week zooms by him like an unpleasant movie.
All of that worry and the plotting and planning. The agony that he felt wondering if you’d leave him when you found out about his child with Jane was the most unbearable.
Your face flashes before his eyes and he knows that there’s only one place he can be right now.
He throws his hand out and a metallic whistling rushes closer before his fist closes around his hammer.
He swings it firmly and throws it up into the air as he makes for your home.
Now that he has nothing to keep him here, he’s eager to get back to you. He’ll tell you everything and hope that you can forgive him for lying to you about Jane.
Even though it was a lie by omission, it was still a lie.
“I’m coming, my cherub,” he whispers, so eager to have you in his arms again.
Nothing will ever tear him from you again. He is certain. Nothing. Not a false heir, or a former love, no doubts exist within him anymore. You are the one.
The only one.
508 notes · View notes
iliveiloveiwrite · 4 years
Text
Happiness, I’m sorry you’ve been on hold.
Request: Could you do a one shot of Fred Weasley after the war, where he doesn’t die and actually falls in love with a muggle. And he tells her about wizards and meets his family? Thank you!
A/N: So this is now the longest thing I have ever written. My aim for this was to make it equal parts angst and equal parts fluff because I think Fred deserves all the fluff. Thank you so much for requesting this! I hope I have done it justice! Please read the warnings before reading this fic should anything trigger - you come first, not fic reading. Also, if anyone can name the TV shows I mention in this, you get a gold star! Title from Volbeat - For Evigt. I hope you all enjoy, I know it’s long!!
Pairing: Fred Weasley x Fem!Reader
Warnings: mentions of war, depression, insomnia, PTSD, swearing, food, but THERE IS SO MUCH FLUFF - SO MUCH (as well as a bit of steaminess).
Word count: 13.3k
Tumblr media
The voices have blurred into a senseless mess; Fred can only just make out the deep timbre of adult males and the high pitched shouts of students. He doesn’t need to hear the words to know that spells are being thrown left, right, and centre.
He does his fair share of fighting; hurling jinx after jinx at any Death Eater he comes upon.
The corridor he runs down is moaning and groaning as if ready to collapse, but Fred continues, his breath coming in pants. His eyes run over the bodies of students and teachers; his heart beginning the painful mourning process then and there.
Someone shouts; he doesn’t know who.
Something creaks; he doesn’t know what.
A brilliant flash of light bounces in front of his eyes, and he feels himself blown away just as the wall beside him starts to collapse.
Whether from shock or from injury, his vision fades to black.
Fred wakes with a start; heart racing, mouth gaping wide in a silent scream, hands gripping the bedsheets in a vice-tight hold.
With his eyes closed, he takes a deep breath before he begins to go through his exercise. An exercise he repeats nightly.
Aloud he says their names like a mantra: “Mum, Dad, Bill, Charlie, Percy, George, Ron, Ginny.”
He does this over and over again until his heart rate calms, and his hands can release the bedsheets.
Fred checks the clock; 3am. He nods, sighing. Three hours sleep.
Fred supposes he should be thankful. After all, it’s three hours more than he got the night before.
He leaves his bed, dragging his feet to the kitchen where with a flick of his wand, the kettle begins to boil, and teabag drops itself into his favourite mug – his only mug.
The Second Wizard War had been over for almost a year now, and for the most part, life had returned to normal. Routines were picked back up and time had simply started to move on.
But Fred felt stuck.
He couldn’t shake the nightmares; keeping the house up with his screams. He couldn’t face opening the shop up despite George’s best attempts at pleading.
He didn’t have it in him to laugh.
He felt broken; as if something vital within him snapped in two the day he avoided the winged clutches of death.
Settling on the couch with his now steeping mug of tea, Fred resigns himself to the fact that he won’t be getting anymore sleep tonight.
The TV plays lowly in the background, a rerun of an old British sitcom set in a prison playing. Fred pays it little to no attention; instead, looking around the small flat he’s called home for the last eight months of his life. The walls are sparsely decorated; a few photos hung up but nothing that screams his personality. His cupboards remain filled just enough for one person, as does his fridge. It’s a flat fit for a hermit; Fred thinks that’s what he’s become.
He decided to leave home two months after the end of the war. When he started to notice the dark circles underneath his mother’s eyes and realised that he was the cause of them – his nightmares and his screams.
Molly cried when he left; worried sick over how he would look after himself and cope. Fred reassured her and made a promise to send letters twice a week – a promise he has yet to break.
George was understandably angry with his twin’s decision, but he knew that deep down that Fred needed to go to heal so he can laugh in the shop once again.
With a tight hug from his parents and siblings alike, Fred began his new life in muggle society.
A frantic knock at his door has Fred spilling his tea and falling out of his reminiscing. Jumping up from the couch, his hand grabs his wand, ready to defend himself should he need to.
His breath comes in quick pants as a result of the adrenaline and panic coursing through his system. The only people who know where he lives are his family with the added bonus of Harry, Hermione and Lee Jordan; no-one else had his address.
The frantic knocking continues; becoming quicker if it was at all possible. Fred swallows past the lump in his throat as he unlocks his door, wrenching it open in a swift movement, ready to confront whatever was on the other side.
Fred wasn’t prepared for it to be you.
You stand in front of his flat with a wild look on your face; equal parts terror and panic. Your hand is still raised in a fist, ready to rain down on the faded red of his door. You only just stop yourself from pounding your fist into his chest.
“Can I help you?” Fred greets.
“I’m so sorry, I know how late it is, but I need your help.”
Fred raises an eyebrow, “What with?”
You toe his welcome mat sheepishly, pointing towards your flat next door to his. “There’s a massive spider in my bathroom and I’m too scared to kill it myself.”
“You’re knocking down my door at this time in the morning for a spider?” Fred asks incredulously.
You glare at him, “This isn’t just any spider, okay? It’s massive; I can practically see its kneecaps!” You huff, placing your hands on your hips, “Will you please help me?”
Fred leans against the doorframe, a smirk gracing his lips, “What’s in it for me?”
You purse your lips; eyes glancing between the red-headed man vexing you and the door to your flat where you know the spider is waiting to make a mockery of you. You sigh, deciding the former is the lesser evil than the latter, “I’ll buy you breakfast.”
“You’ll buy me breakfast for killing a spider?”
You nod rapidly, “Yes, I’ll buy you breakfast, and I’ll even fork out extra for hash browns, just please kill the spider.”
Fred pauses; pretending to think it over in order to annoy you that little bit more. It had been a while since he had taken the time to vex someone; he had to admit he was rather enjoying getting on your nerves.
“Well?” You press, tapping your foot on his welcome mat, “Will you help me or not?”
Fred pushes himself off the doorframe, keeping his wand concealed in his shirt sleeve. He bows at the waist with a cocky smile on his lips, “Lead the way, my lady.”
You roll your eyes at the man; not remembering a time when a man had gotten on your nerves to this extent. You lead him into your flat; his eyes wandering over the heavily decorated walls and the over-filled bookshelves. You pause outside the door to your bathroom, biting your lip as you face the red-haired man, “I last saw it in the sink. It could have moved now.”
Fred nods, “Don’t worry, I’ll find it. Do you have a boot or something I could use?”
You turn away from him, heading back to the entryway where he saw piles upon piles of shoes. “I don’t have a boot,” you start, “but I do have a pair of trainers.”
“They’ll work,” Fred reassures, taking them from your hands.
You throw him a thumbs-up before retreating a few paces into your living room. You haul yourself onto the couch, much to Fred’s amusement, as if the spider is going to come running out of the bathroom to exact its revenge on you for throwing your pot of face cream at it before you sprinted out of your flat.
“Good luck,” You state as Fred opens the door to your bathroom, closing the door behind him.
Fred runs his eyes around your bathroom, looking for the eight-legged arachnid that’s caused this much trouble at this time in the morning. He finds it in no time; still stuck in your sink, unable to make its way up the smooth porcelain sides.
It doesn’t take Fred long to dispose of the spider; trapping it with a spell and flinging it out of the window. For extra measure, and to not alert you to his magic, he slams the trainer down on the tiled floor of your bathroom. Fred even goes so far as to scrunch up some tissue in his hand to make it look as if he had gotten the spider.
If he can avoid it, Fred won’t kill another living creature. In the short span of his life, Fred had seen too much death, and he knows he doesn’t want to be witness to anymore.
Upon opening the door, Fred finds you stood in the exact same place but with a rolled up magazine in your hand. He wants to laugh at the sight, but he can’t dredge up the will to do so. Instead, he holds up the scrunched up tissue and your trainer, declaring, “It’s gone. I got rid of it.”
You jump down from the couch, pottering over to him. The rolled up magazine still in your hand, “It’s in there?”
Fred nods, a little white lie won’t hurt you and he doubts the spider would return. “Do you have somewhere I can put this?” he asks, waving the tissue around.
“Of course, the kitchen is over here.” You lead him to the small kitchenette where he disposes of the empty tissue. You take your trainer off him and Fred claps his hands together as if he’s completed a job well done.
“Right,” He starts, “If you don’t need me for anything else…”
Your eyes widen as if suddenly aware what time it is and how long you’ve kept him, “Of course!” you cry, “I didn’t realise the time, you’ll want to be getting back to sleep. Thank you for all your help…” you trail off, realising you don’t know his name.
“Fred. My name is Fred.”
“Fred,” You smile, “I’m (Y/N).”
“I’m glad I could help, (Y/N),” Fred says, making his way to your door, “I’ll see you tomorrow for breakfast.”
You frown, “Breakfast?”
“You owe me? For killing the spider, remember?”
You hold your hand to your forehead, “Yes! I remember. How does meeting at half past nine sound? I want to get some sleep before I meet you again.”
“Half nine it is. I’ll see you then.” Fred says as goodbye, shutting your front door behind him and making his way back to the couch that had been calling his name since he left it.
The TV has moved on now; showing another rerun of an old sitcom – this one about two brothers hustling their way through life in a borough of London. Fred rather likes this show, having gotten hooked his first month in muggle life. He turns the volume up, taking a sip of his now cold tea.
Fred tries to pay attention to scene currently playing; the brother’s elderly uncle unscrewing the fastenings to a very expensive chandelier they’ve been hired to clean. Little do they know they’ve got their wires crossed and disaster is about to strike.
Fred pays little attention to this, but rather than return to the wallowing he found himself in earlier, he lets himself think of breakfast tomorrow.
His eyes begin to flutter shut; the lack of sleep finally catching up to him. He slumps down onto the couch, reaching for the blanket he keeps draped across the back of it for this very reason, and he throws it across himself. He takes one last look at the television to see that the brothers had been underneath the wrong chandelier their elderly uncle was loosening, and he falls asleep with the thought of breakfast running through his mind.
------------------
Fred is ready too early; he knows he is.
He also thinks he’s overdressed but he doesn’t let himself think too much into that issue.
Another nightmare had awoken him an hour after he fell back asleep in front of the TV. Fred wasn’t too resigned though; four hours sleep in one night was the most he had gotten in a while. He was going to count this as a win.
For a while, he remained on the couch, flicking through the channels hoping to find something other than telly shopping. He skipped over the news channels, not needing to hear anything about muggle society that could potentially send him further into his spiral. He ran a hand over his face as he turned off the TV; he had moved away from home to start getting better; to start the healing process yet he felt as if he was only making things worse.
Before he could let himself dwell further on that subject, he hauled himself into the shower. Taking extra time to scrub at his hair and body; making himself look presentable for breakfast with you.
Fred took extra care in picking out his clothes. Once dressed, he did feel overdressed for the occasion, but as he sits on the couch, watching the hands on his analogue clock tick by slowly, he’s more bothered by the fact that he’s ready over an hour early.
He sighs as he watches the second hand make another circuit around the clock; one less minute to go, he thinks wryly to himself.
If his mother could see him now, Molly Weasley would proceed to smack him with a tea-towel before offering her advice on the matter. Thoughts of his mother has Fred overwhelmed with a strong sense of missing her. He misses his mother more than he misses anyone; how she would always have food on the table and tea ready to drink, how she would push back his hair from his forehead so she could kiss him there. She would do that a lot when the nightmares were very bad; she would sit with him on the couch where he had exiled himself after waking George up too many times – she would run her hands through his hair in a comforting manner, kissing his forehead as his eyes would start to droop. Molly would only let herself rest once her beloved son was sleeping somewhat peacefully.
Fred thinks of this memory as he digs around his flat for some spare parchment and a self-inking quill. He had already sent his two letters for the week, but Molly would be delighted to receive a third unexpectedly.
Quill scratches on parchment for some time. Fred inquires after the wellness of his siblings – did Charlie pull his finger out and ask out Evie? How was Ron and Hermione? How was Dad? Would he like any more of the muggle sweets he’s become so fond of?
Fred asks the inane questions before asking about George. Fred knows that George loves him; they’re twins, they’re closer than any other sibling would hope to be. George knew Fred’s moods like the back of his hand and he only wants the best for his brother. Which is why Fred struggles with the guilt at leaving George to cope with the joke shop alone. George has reassured him that it’s okay, that he needs to take time and the shop will always be here when he’s ready to come back.
But it still doesn’t lessen the guilt that sits in his stomach like a lead balloon.
Black ink covers his hand by the he’s finished his letter; finishing his letter with the news of breakfast with someone he could see being a good friend. That would be enough to quash his mother’s worries that he doesn’t leave his flat enough. He seals the envelope with wax, making a mental note to go to a wizarding post office after breakfast so he can send it off in express time to his mother.
Cracking his knuckles – a nasty habit he picked up at Hogwarts – Fred checks the time to see that it’s almost half past nine. He slips on his denim jacket, tucking his letter into an inside pocket, patting it to reassure himself it’s there.
As he’s locking up the door, he sees you exiting your flat. Fred realises that when you aren’t dressed in mismatched pyjamas with a terrified look on your face, you’re rather beautiful.
You hurry over to him; your bag bouncing against your hip as you come to a stop in front of him. “Good Morning,” you greet.
“Good Morning. How did you sleep? Any more spiders?”
You direct your gaze to the floor, feeling somewhat sheepish in the light of day, “I know I said it last night, but thank you again. I wouldn’t have been able to sleep if you hadn’t have got it.”
Fred smiles softly, “I didn’t mind. Besides, I get breakfast out of it.”
You perk up, “That you do! Off we go then.”
You lead him out of the building, continuing on the main road before turning left and then a right. Fred follows you all the way; making small attempts at idle conversation which you gladly take up, chatting to him about anything and everything as you lead him down a side street to where a small café sits.
The bell above the door chimes happily as you enter the building, holding the door open for Fred to duck in first.
You lead him to a table by the window that’s big enough for two. He pulls out your chair for you, letting you sit first before shrugging off his jacket and hanging it over the back of his chair. Fred may have been a little shit through his childhood and adolescence, but he had listened to his mother when she explained the etiquette for dining with a lady whether it be breakfast, lunch or dinner.
Menus are handed to the both of you by a waitress who looks to be wanting to be anywhere but here right now. Fred sympathises with her a little; remembering the early starts for the shop. They order their food in no time; you ordering a latte and Fred ordering a Yorkshire Tea to go with your Full English’s with extra hash browns.
You grin at him from across the table, “Thanks for agreeing to this.”
“Thanks for offering.”
“Did you get back to sleep okay after I woke you up?” You asks, face lined with worry.
Fred nods, clearing his throat, “I nodded back off, yeah.”
You sigh with relief, “That’s good, I’m glad.”
“Did you sleep okay?”
“I slept very well in my spider-free flat, yes.”
You fall silent as your drinks are placed in front of you with a promise that your food would be with you shortly. Fred smiles at the waitress in thanks as she leaves.
He turns his attention back to you, “How long have you lived in the building? I’m sure I would have seen you before.”
You wave a hand nonchalantly, “Not very long, I moved in a couple of months ago. How long have you lived there?”
Fred sips at his tea, adding a dash of sugar and milk before answering, “Around eight months now.”
You nod at his answer, taking a drink of your latte. The caffeine was needed; the adrenaline from the spider incident had taken a while to leave your body, leaving you tossing and turning in your bed and providing you more opportunity to think about the red-headed neighbour you had just met.
“I’m going to propose an idea.”
“Oh?”
“I say we play twenty-one questions and get to know each other.”
“Get to know each other?”
You blink at him, “Yes. We’re neighbours and we’re having breakfast. What else should we talk about? The weather?”
Fred glances out the window at your words, a slow smile spreading over his face. “Well the weather is particularly lovely for London.”
You hush him, “That’s not very neighbourly of you.”
“Perhaps I’m not very neighbourly,” Fred taunts.
You gasp dramatically, “I refuse to believe that. If you weren’t neighbourly, you would have shut the door in my face last night.”
Fred raises an eyebrow, “Would you have started to knock again if I did?”
You purse your lips, repressing a smile, “Maybe.”
“Then I simply helped to lessen the noise.”
You scoff, “I don’t believe that for a second.”
“You don’t have to.”
You glare at him, “Fred, stop being an arsehole and let me get to know you.”
Fred barks out a laugh, covering his mouth at the volume of the noise, “Well, when you put it like that. What do you want to know?”
You beam at him, and Fred can’t help but smile back. “How old are you?” you ask.
“I’m 22.”
“Are you at university?”
Fred shakes his head, “I thought I was supposed to ask the next question.”
You level him with a look, “Answer this one and then you can ask the next one.”
“Alright, but you can’t go jumping in with another question before I’ve asked mine. No, I’m not at university,” You open your mouth to interrupt but close it when you remember Fred’s words. He smiles at you, “How old are you?”
“You can’t repeat questions!”
“Why not?” Fred asks, affronted, “It’s only fair I know your age too!”
“Fine,” you mutter, “I’m 22 as well. 23 in a month.”
Fred nods, waiting patiently for your next question. You open your mouth, the words ready on the tip of your tongue but the waitress returns with your breakfast. The very smell of it has Fred’s stomach rumbling; he hadn’t a cooked breakfast like this since he left the Burrow. He digs in with renewed vigour; repressing a moan at the taste of the fried bread.
“It’s good, isn’t it?”
Fred nods, unable to reply due to the mouthful of food he’s chewing.
You nod in understanding, swallowing your mouthful before saying, “I found this place in my final year of university; I needed somewhere that reminded me of my mum’s breakfasts. Her breakfasts will always be number one, but this comes pretty close.”
Fred pauses with a forkful of scrambled egg halfway to his mouth, “That’s what I miss most about home – my mum and her cooking.”
“Are you not from London originally?” You asks around a mouthful of bacon.
Fred shakes his head, “Devon originally. A tiny village in the county; it’s more of a hamlet really.”
Your eyes widen; eyebrows flying into your hairline, “Devon? That’s a while away. How often do you get to see your family?”
“Not as often as I’d like.” Fred says, drinking his tea.
For a moment, it’s silent between the two of you. The scraping of cutlery on plates being the only sound. Fred thinks of his family as he eats his breakfast; wondering what their plans are for the day – whether they’d be gnome hunting or playing quidditch or simply helping Molly with her vegetable garden. His heart hurts as he thinks of them; overcome with the absence of them from his life. It makes him shiver as he reaches for another drink of tea.
Fred breaks the comfortable silence, “What about you? Where are you from originally?”
“Lancashire originally but I moved to the south when I was young – it’s why my accent is so odd.”
Fred frown; he hadn’t noticed anything odd about your accent, thinking the way that you pronounced your vowels was similar to the way young Neville Longbottom does his, but yours are cut shorter.
“Tell me,” He starts, “Do you see your family as often as you’d like?”
“You’re going to repeat my every question, aren’t you?”
Fred grins, “Maybe… Maybe not. You’ll have to stick around to find out. Now, do you see your family as often as you’d like?”
You shake your head, “Not really. My parents like to travel a lot; a cruise here, a two week holiday there, a road trip across America through the summer. I don’t blame them though; they worked hard for the time they have now. I just wish they’d drop in more.”
“Are you rich?” Fred asks before he can stop himself. He cringes as the words leave his mouth.
You chuckle at the awkward expression on his face, “I’m not. My parents are. I’m a humble student working towards their master’s degree. My father created his company in printing greeting cards; he sold it off a few years back for a lot of money and they’ve been enjoying themselves since.”
“You’re a master’s student?” Fred asks; his knowledge on muggle degrees somewhat limited to what Hermione had told him.
You nod, scraping up the last forkful of food on your plate. “Yeah, I’m getting my master’s in Library Science.”
“What do you hope to do after that?”
“Work in a library or well, continue to work in a library, I already work at my university one. I’d love to work in an archives one day though, cataloguing pieces of history.”
Fred nods, enraptured by your words. He didn’t realise how much choice there was for muggles and their education. The wizarding world was somewhat limited to how witches and wizards could harness their talents; Fred and George were practically pariahs for choosing to dedicate their lives to pranks and happiness. He had always assumed the muggle world worked in the same way, but here you were, proving him wrong.
Knives and forks are crossed on plates when you ask, “You aren’t a university student, so you must have a job. What do you do for a living, Fred?”
Fred decides a kernel of truth wouldn’t do too much harm, “I own a joke shop with my twin brother.”
You laugh, clapping your hands together, “That’s incredible! Is the shop here in London?”
Fred nods, “It is. My twin brother is running it for the time being.”
“Can we go see it?”
Fred freezes; he hadn’t anticipated this. He glances down at the watch wrapped around his wrist then back up at you, not missing the glint of mischief in your eyes. “Perhaps another time?” he suggest, “I have some errands I need to run today that I can’t avoid.”
You lean back in your chair, feeling somewhat sad but you shake it off. “Of course, but I’ll hold you to that Fred. I won’t rest until I see your shop.”
Fred grins, “I have a feeling you’ll stick to your word.”
You move to reply but are interrupted by the waitress coming by to collect your plates and ask if you want anything else. She leaves the bill behind when her question is declined. Fred reaches for his wallet, but you stop him by snatching the bill.
“I made you a promise last night. Breakfast for your excellent services.”
Fred rubs a hand across the back of his neck, “I feel bad letting you pay.”
“Aren’t you a gentleman?” You tease, “No, I said I would buy you breakfast so I’m buying you breakfast. You can buy it next time.”
“So there’s going to be a next time?”
You shrug, biting your lip. “Sure – you might need my services for something. A blocked pipe or a blow fuse.”
Fred stands, pulling on his denim jacket, patting his inside pocket to find that his letter is still there.
You walk back to the main road together; waving goodbye to him as you head towards your university and he to a side street where he can apparate to the nearest wizarding post office. Fred hands his letter over to the clerk, paying a few extra knuts for express delivery.
Fred takes his time walking back to his flat; enjoying the spring day that was blooming around him. He felt lighter as he walked; as if he didn’t need to put as much effort into putting one foot in front of the other. He put it down to you and your presence; there was something about you that evoked all sorts of emotions from him. There was something about you that made him want to see you again.
However, he knew by tonight, the familiar fog will have settled over him – dulling the light of everything around him. He knew that he would still struggle to sleep; being lucky enough to get even an hour in before being pulled to consciousness kicking and screaming his way out of the same nightmare.
-----------------
His time over the next month is split three ways. He spends a third of it on his couch; watching old reruns of sitcoms – his new favourite being set in second muggle war and follows the Home Guard; Fred finds himself whistling the theme song more often than he’d like to admit. He uses his time on the couch to write his letters to Molly who was thrilled at the aspect of Fred making a friend; she wrote question after question about wanting to know their star sign to their hair colour. Fred smiles fondly; a smile reserved only for his mother – one that got even bigger when a second owl arrived with a small note with another question. Through all of her excited questioning, Molly forgot one crucial detail – what was their name?
He spends the second third of his time running. Fred had always been sporty; had always had an athletic build that helped him gain his spot on the Gryffindor Quidditch team as a Beater with George on the team too. However, there are few places in muggle London where he can play the sport freely, so he gets it into his head to pretend to train for a match. Fred begins to run; every morning and every evening. Two runs a day, seven days a week. The runs on an evening tire out his body so he has more of a chance of falling into bed with the hopeless prayer of a dreamless sleep uttered from his lips. However, the runs on a morning are more frantic as he runs off the excess adrenaline and panic running through his system as a result of the night terror his mind unleashed upon him, dragging him from sleep less than two hours after his eyes closed.
Then Fred spends the final third of his time with you. In your flat or walking around Hyde Park or visiting your university.
Fred finds himself spending more and more time with you; he starts to crave your company. And he feels ridiculous for feeling that way because he’s only known you for over a month and he should be using this time to start the healing process.
But he’s already told his mother about you; and who isn’t to say that he can’t work on healing from the trauma of the war with you by his side being a warm, comforting presence?
Fred sits on his couch at nearing two in the morning; questioning his entire existence and reasoning for moving to muggle society when he realises that whilst it’s only been just over a month, if he wants to start healing with you by his side, he needs to be entirely honest with you.
He needs to confess.
----------------
Fred inhales a deep breath before knocking on your door. He shuffles from side to side, nerves rioting in his stomach. In less than a minute, you’ve wrenched open your door, smiling widely as you take in Fred standing before you.
“Freddie! To what do I owe this pleasure?”
He holds his hands behind his back as he rocks back onto his heels, “Do you want to go on a walk?”
Your eyes run over his face; taking in the dark circles underneath his eyes. He had told you about his insomnia soon after the friendship began; it worried you, but Fred had reassured you that he had it controlled. “Are you having trouble sleeping?”
Fred nods, “That, and I really need to talk to you.”
“No problem. Let me just get my shoes on.”
Fred smiles as he watches you toe on the slip on trainers he had come to know as Vans. You told him just last week about your obsession with them; unable to resist buying a new pair each time you passed the shop.
You grab your jacket from the hook, pulling it on as you lock the door behind you, bumping into Fred as you step out into the hallway.
Fred leads you out of the building, turning the usual left that heads in the direction of the park. You struggle to keep up with his long strides; calling out for him to slow down a little so you can at least walk side by side. He smiles at you as you catch up to him; apologising for his speed, he is just anxious.
The walk to the park is walked in silence. Fred’s mind occupied with how he’s going to tell you the most important thing about himself and how you’re going to react when you find out that a lot of your friendship was built on a lie.
The park settles on the horizon too soon and his heart is in his mouth. Fred used to be a confident guy; happily getting involved in scheme after scheme that would bring chaos and laughter to the corridors of Hogwarts, but he had lost that part of him in the battle. He wondered if he would ever be that guy again.
You bump his shoulder, “We’re at the park, what did you want to talk about?”
Fred settles on a nearby bench; fiddling with his fingers, “I need to tell you something  but I’m not sure how to say it.”
“That’s fine. Why don’t you tell me why we’re in the park?”
Fred sighs, “It’s so you have the freedom and the choice to leave after I tell you what I’ve been keeping from you.”
Your heart starts to pound in your chest; panic rising slowly in your gut. “What have you been keeping from me that’s so bad that I would need to walk away from you?”
Fred turns in his spot, staring into your eyes, “Do you promise to hear me out and not interrupt?”
“Fred, you’re worrying me. What’s the matter?”
“Do you promise?”
“Yes, I promise! Now what’s wrong?”
“I’ve been lying to you… about so much.”
The air is knocked out of you, “I’m going to need more than that, Fred,” you whisper breathlessly.
“Do you remember when we first had breakfast? And I told you about the joke shop I own with my twin?”
“Yes… so what did you lie about? The joke shop or the twin?”
“Neither. I just lied about why you couldn’t see it.”
“Why?” You ask; your tone incredulous.
“Because I’m a wizard, and the joke shop I own with my twin – who is also a wizard – is a magical joke shops selling pranks and potions to witches and wizards attending Hogwarts.”
You stand from the bench, wrapping your arms tightly around yourself, wondering when the TV cameras are going to show up, “That isn’t funny, Fred.”
“I’m not joking, (Y/N). I’m not lying to you now.”
“How do I know? What’s Hogwarts? Who is your twin? What’s the name of your shop? Why aren’t you there?”
Fred had prepared himself for the barrage of questions he knew would inevitably fall from your mouth; curiosity being your besetting sin. He hadn’t prepared himself for the look of betrayal and hurt that crosses over face as you continue to stare at him. Fred feels his already broken heart break some more at the sight of it.
He runs a hand over his face, “(Y/N), love, please sit down. I’ll tell you everything.”
“Everything?” You question, “I want to know it all.”
Fred crosses over his heart, “I promise. Now please sit down.”
You sit next to him; a few inches away as if the small distance will help to protect the heart that you had already started to give to the broken red-headed man.
You remain silent as Fred sorts out his words; you can see the cogs in his mind working as he figures out how to explain an entire society that you hadn’t known existed until less than a minute ago.
Finally he releases a breath and begins.
“Witches and wizards have always been around, but after famous witch hunts such as Salem, Pendle, and Samlesbury, we had to go into hiding to protect our numbers. From the age of eleven, we go to Hogwarts. Hogwarts is a school in the highlands of Scotland dedicated to teaching young witches and wizards the art of magic as well as how to control it. My twin is called George; we’re identical and sometimes, our own mother struggles to tell us apart,” Fred breaks off with a short laugh, thinking of Molly with fondness.
“He’s my rock, he’s my best friend. We bought the joke shop when we were eighteen – it’s called Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes and it’s found in Diagon Alley. For your sake, it’s found near Charing Cross Road.”
Fred pauses once again, readying himself to explain his absence from the shop and his presence in your life. “I’m not there because I moved away. In our society, there was a dark wizard who started a war for purposes beyond me. I just know that when I was 21 I was running through the corridors of the school I used to attend fighting for my life and watching people I knew die. I almost died myself when a wall was blown apart; luckily, someone spelled me out of the way. I’ll be forever grateful to them for that.
“After the war, I couldn’t cope. I was doing more harm than good by being with my family – my insomnia stems from nightmares of the war so I left. I left them and moved here where I’ve started to heal from my experiences and where I met you after you started to bang on my door. I wanted to tell you sooner; my mother told me to in her letters, but I was enjoying my time with you, and I didn’t want to ruin what we have. It means a lot to me.”
Fred falls silent with a smile aimed at you. Your mouth hangs open from his words; unsure on whether to take them for the truth they sounded like or to question him to find the holes in his story.
But he looks so vulnerable; the smile is watery, and his eyes are lined with tears. You realise that it’s taken a lot for him to confess this to you, but that it had been weighing on his mind for some time.
You don’t say anything immediately. Instead, you draw his head to your shoulder, and he lets out the sob he’s been holding in since he started to talk about his past. You wrap your arms around him tightly; holding him together as he lets himself fall to pieces in your arms. You’re in public, and this is a scene but the both of you don’t care. You hold him to you until his sobs begin to quieten into sniffles.
“I’m sorry,” Fred murmurs, pulling away from you as he wipes his eyes.
“Never apologise for crying.”
He sniffles, “Do you believe me?”
You nod, “I do. I don’t think anyone could have made up what you just said. I don’t think there’s enough imagination in the world for it. But there’s one thing I want to know.”
Fred watches you warily, “What is it?”
You grip his hand tightly, “Are you healing, Fred? Are you coping?”
Fred’s shoulders slump as the tension leaves his body; he had tensed at your words, worried at what you might say. He stares into your eyes as he answers, “I am. I was struggling at first, but I think I’m starting to heal.”
“Can I help? How can I help?”
Fred pats your hand, “Continue doing what you’re doing, it’s enough.”
And it is. Fred finds it easier to breathe in your presence as if the weight of the world is no longer on his shoulders like he were Atlas. Instead, he finds it easier to focus on other things such as plans for the day or listening to you talk about your latest assignment. He doesn’t feel his mind drift off as much when he’s around you; which is a good thing, he thinks.
You smile at him, still holding onto his hand, “I can do that.”
You both fall into quiet; eyes now focused on the expanse of the park. Fred watches a young mother push her young son the swings, hearing his delighted laughter, whilst your eyes land on the teenage couple making out underneath a tree; you move your eyes away quickly, focusing instead, on the ducks swimming in the pond.
You break the silence, “Fred?”
He hums in answer.
“Would you cast a spell for me?” You ask tentatively, “If that’s okay!”
Fred smiles softly; letting go of your hand to reach for the dogwood wand he keeps hidden up his sleeve. With flare he hasn’t shown since opening the store, he pulls the wand out. He rolls the wand over his fingers, “Wizards can practice magic outside of school from the age of seventeen; I can show you a spell.”
“Really?” You ask, bouncing in your place.
“Are you ready?”
“Hold on, let me think for a minute… YES.” You shout, stamping your feet in the grass.
Fred grins; his eyes crinkling in the corners from the size of his smile. He checks for witnesses before holding his wand up whispering the incantation ‘Lumos’. The tip of his wand begins to glow with a pale light which in the falling darkness of the day only helps him see the beauty in your features.
You gasp at the sight of the light emanating from Fred’s wand, resisting the urge to reach out and touch it. “I can’t believe it,” you sigh, “All this time I asked you to change lightbulbs and you could create light with a single word.”
“You’re not scared or freaked out?” He asks, unable to stop himself. The small voice in the back of his head needed to know whether you were going to leave him.
You shake your head, still watching the pale white light. With a single whisper of ‘Nox’, Fred turns out the light and slides his wand back into his sleeve. You turn your attention back to Fred, “I’m not scared or freaked out. I’m just in awe of you and this entire society that’s survived in secret. I feel like I’m privy to a secret organisation.”
“You’re in awe of me?” Fred asks; those being the only words he focused on in your entire sentence after confirming you weren’t scared of him.
“Absolutely. You can conjure magic, Fred! Actual magic! It’s incredible,” Your hands frame his face, keeping his eyes on you as you lean close and whisper, “You are incredible.”
He covers your hands with his; wondering when he’d become so soft. “Thank you,” he replies.
You pull away too soon; Fred’s hands dropping to his side, feeling suddenly cold at the loss of contact.
Standing from the bench, you hold your hand out for Fred to take. “Come on, magic man. It’s time we went home.”
“Magic man?” He asks, amused. He takes your offered hand, pulling himself up from the park bench.
“It’s my new nickname for you, do you like?”
“Magic man… magic man,” Fred repeats, testing the name out on his tongue, “I suppose I do.”
“Good, because I don’t think I’ll call you anything else.”
The walk back to the flat is quicker than the walk to the park. Fred’s steps lighter now than they were earlier. Chased by the turning on of street lights, you reach your building and lead him into your flat, offering him a warm drink as he takes a seat on your cream coloured couch.
Fred takes the hot mug of tea from you as you sit down next to him. He takes a shy sip, careful not to burn his tongue. It’s perfect, as it always is. You always know the right amount of sugar and milk to add.
“Thank you for telling me that today, I know it wasn’t easy for you.”
“It wasn’t, but it got easier when you didn’t walk away. I was so worried that you were going to.”
“I don’t think I’d have forgiven myself if I had.”
Teas are drank after that, and Fred whispers goodnight to you before kissing your cheek in a rare moment of tenderness. He lets himself out of your flat, making the short walk back to his where he throws himself on the couch and lets himself wonder when exactly he had started to fall in love with you.
-----------------
Two more months follow, and Fred knows that he’s now arse over tea kettle in love you. From the top of your head to the tips of your toes, that you like to shove under legs when laid on the couch together, so he yelps at their temperature.
Two more months follow, and Fred feels like he’s maybe able to start living his life again, but in small doses. He writes to his mother more who’s delighted by the tales he tells of you and your growing relationship; he could never keep anything from Molly – her face too trusting and her manner too warm. All Molly is concerned about in her letters is whether Fred is happy, and for the first time in over a year, Fred can reply saying he thinks he could be.
Molly won’t ever tell Fred this, but she cried at that letter, feeling her heart burst with happiness for the son she had always worried about.
Time passes, and Fred spends more and more time with you. Breakfast dates, lunch dates, movie marathons on the couch – he does it all with you. You even go so far as to make him decorate his flat more; pictures of his family now line the walls as well as the picture of him and George on the opening day of Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes.
That’s when he knows he needs to go back to Diagon Alley, and he’s taking you with him.
-----------------
At nine am on the dot, Fred knocks on your door until you open it. You glare at the red-headed man, demanding to know his presence at your door when he only left at four am after binging the entire Godfather trilogy without realising how long the films are.
Fred beams at your state, “Go get dressed, I’ll make you some coffee.”
“Why?” You ask, puzzled.
“I’m taking you to Diagon Alley and my joke shop.”
You stagger back a couple of steps, “Really? Are you sure? Are you ready?”
Fred’s grin moulds into something softer at your concern. “I am, and I want you to come with me.”
A slow smile breaks across your face, “Give me ten minutes and we can go!”
You rush into your room; pulling open the doors to your wardrobe and raking through to find any sort of clothes you’d wear to visit a magical shop, and possibly meet the twin brother of the man you’d fallen in love with.
Minutes later, you exit your room, pulling a brush through your hair to make yourself look more presentable. Gratefully, you take the cup of coffee from Fred’s hand before rushing into your bathroom to brush your teeth and spritz yourself in your favourite perfume – jasmine, lavender and citrus.
You drain the dregs of your coffee as you leave the bathroom. Dropping the pale pink mug in the sink, you turn to find Fred leaning against your kitchen counter with an amused and entertained look on his face.
“Someone’s excited, I see.” He teases.
You pout, “It’s not every day I get to go see magical London, magic man.”
Fred claps his hands, laughing quietly. “Come on then, let’s get you to Diagon Alley.”
--------------
Diagon Alley is nestled behind Charing Cross Road; it’s the largest area of wizarding London and is completely hidden from the muggle world.
Fred has been visiting Diagon Alley for as long as he can remember; flooing there with his mother and Bill, Charlie and Percy to collect their things for the latest school year. As a child, he loved visiting Florean Fortescue’s when the budget permitted it; getting a single scoop cone with rainbow sprinkles.
As he enters the Leaky Cauldron, leading you in by the hand, Fred is a mix of fear and excitement making him act jittery as he approaches the familiar face of Tom, the barman.
“Fred Weasley? Is that you?” Tom asks, a large smile on his face, “I haven’t seen you in over a year! How have you been?”
“I’ve been well, Tom. How have you been?”
“Never better – you know me.”
Fred smiles, nodding. “I’m heading out back, is that okay?”
“Anything for a Weasley. Does this have something to do with the muggle hiding behind your back?”
You reveal yourself from where you’ve hidden yourself behind Fred. Keeping a tight hold on his hand, you smile shyly at the barman, “I’m (Y/N). It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
Tom smiles politely, “It’s a pleasure to meet you too.” Tom turns his attention back to Fred, “You know what to do.”
Fred parts ways with barman he had grown up knowing, pulling you to the back door which opens into a small courtyard.
“Fred, love, it’s a dead end.”
“Are you sure?” Fred asks with a smirk, reaching for his wand. “Want to see some proper magic?”
“Always, magic man.”
He grins at the use of your nickname for him before tapping his wand on the bricks blocking your way. You cry out as the bricks begin to move; shifting to the side to reveal an entryway to a cobbled street lined with shop after shop all varying in colours.
Letting go of Fred’s hand, you take your first step into the wizarding world; already in love with every aspect of it, just as you’re in love with every aspect of the man making his way to your side.
“What do you think?” He asks, breathless at the sight of the place he hasn’t seen in a year.
“This is unlike any other place I’ve seen.” You hold your hand out for Fred to grab, “Show me around?”
“With pleasure,” Fred replies, wrapping your hand in his, tangling your fingers.
Fred takes you on a tour of the Alley; stopping outside Ollivander’s and getting out his wand to explain the importance of the place, turning his wand around to show you what he means. He tells you the story of Harry Potter; of what his wand meant, being the twin of the wand that had killed his parents. Your heart breaks for the boy you had never met; had never even heard of until today – you ask after him, how is he now? Fred reassures you; after all, he’s fine, Harry’s dating his younger sister much to Fred’s chagrin.
He takes you into Florean Fortescue’s, buying you ice cream for breakfast as any adult should have. Your eyes widen at the taste of the Butterbeer ice cream; butterscotch and buttercream icing bursting on your tongue. Fred smiles at your expression, licking his way through his own ice cream – strawberries and cream for nostalgia’s sake.
Sitting down at a small table, you tap your ice creams to each other in a toast. “Where are we going next?” You ask, catching a drip of the melting ice cream with your tongue – not missing the way Fred’s eyes track the movement.
“I thought we could visit my shop.”
“Your shop?” You ask in disbelief, “Are you sure?”
Fred nods, catching a drip on his own ice cream. He doesn’t miss the way your eyes also track the movement of his mouth. “Yes, I’m sure.” He looks away, ashamed, “I’ve left George alone too long.”
You reach for his hand across the table, “I’m sure he understands, Fred.”
“I know he does, but it doesn’t stop the guilt.”
You rub your thumb across the back of his hand in a comforting motion, “Are you sure you’re okay to go? We can always come back another day.”
“You’d come back with me?”
You grin, “Of course, this is the best ice cream I’ve ever had. I’m here for you, magic man – who else is going to kill the spiders in my bathroom?”
Fred relaxes, “You’re the best, you know that right?”
You take another lick of your ice cream, “I do know that. Do you want to stay and see your brother, or do you want to go? I’m happy with either, but you’re going to have to give me time to get more ice cream.”
Fred laughs at your words, “It is good ice cream,” he takes a lick of his, “No, let’s go. I need to see him; I need to apologise.”
“Alright then. We’ll finish here and then we’ll go to Weasley’s Wizard Wheezes… at last.”
He nods, remaining silent. The ice creams are finished in silence; questioning looks sent to each other across the table. Your feelings for Fred often overwhelmed you with their strength; never imagining that knocking on his door in the early hours of the morning could ever lead to something like this. In the short time you had known the man, you had fallen head over heels for him and also had your entire worldview altered by finding out about the existence of magic.
He’d quite literally turned your world upside down, and the only thing that ran through your mind through it all was: I hope he feels the same.
Soon though, faces are wiped on napkins and hands are back to hold each other’s as Fred leads you from the ice cream parlour to where the orange top hat stands out against the darkly coloured shops.
In a last minute attempt to delay the inevitable, Fred pulls you over to the pet shop. You coo over the animals; pointing to the Puffskein with questions burning on your tongue. Fred answers them all happily, delighted to delay walking into the shop and brother he’s neglected for so long.
After a few more minutes, you step away from the shop window citing the temptation being too great and you may end up smuggling the Puffskeins to the muggle world.
“That was a fantastic distraction, magic man.”
“Wasn’t it?” He admits, blushing at having been caught out but not wanting to lie to you, “It worked like a treat.”
You chuckle, “It really did. They remind me of clouds do the Puffskeins; neon, furry clouds.”
Fred snorts, “An excellent description.”
The joke shop now looms in front of the two of you; the bright orange and purple of the paintwork almost luminous in the morning light. Fred stops in the middle of the pavement; feet stuck to the floor, unable to carry him forward. He’s avoided this for so long, but he finally feels ready to insert himself back into the life of pranks, jokes, and happiness.
Your grip on his hand tightens, “I’m here, magic man. I’m not going anywhere.”
His nod is the only sign you get to know that he’s heard your words.
Taking a deep breath, Fred begins to put one foot in front of the other; a hand outstretched for the door handle to the shop, giving it a light push. The bell above the door rings, signalling his entrance into the shop but also his entrance into his old life.
The shop is quiet; it being still too early in the day to get masses and masses of shoppers. Their busy season is the three weeks in August before terms starts where students come to buy their school books but to also stock up on items of mischief.
A near identical man to Fred stands up straighter from his position behind the counter. He starts to open his mouth, to welcome the new customers to the shop but when he looks up, the words never leave his mouth.
He simply freezes in place.
His eyes flicker between the two of you quickly, before running over the man stood next to you. Looking for what, you don’t know.
In between one blink of an eye and the next, he’s thrown himself across the counter, sprinting to where Fred stands in the entryway.
No words are spoken; he just holds Fred’s face in his hands before pulling him in for a hug that’s been long overdue.
You step away from their reunion, letting your eyes roam over the shop. They need this moment alone; you don’t need to invade by watching them. You wander a little; fingers running over displays. You frown when you see you an area lit up in pink titled ‘Love Potion’.
You pick up one of the little bottles shaped like a heart; the bright pink liquid inside jostling as you examine it.
“Careful,” A voice sounds behind you, “It’s a powerful potion.”
Turning you find Fred’s twin, George watching you with inquisitive eyes. “What does it do?” You ask, fiddling with the stopper.
“It mimics the effects of love and obsession. If you smell it, you smell the person you love.”
You raise an eyebrow, “Truly?”
George nods, “Truly. We sell crates full of the stuff nearing Valentine’s Day.”
Releasing the stopper from the neck of the bottle, you take a delicate sniff. Peonies, rain, and Yorkshire tea come filtering through. The very smells you’ve become to associate with the man who had never really been your neighbour but has always been something more.
Replacing the stopper, you drop the potion into George’s waiting hand. He pockets it before turning back to face his twin.
“What did you smell?” Fred asks as you settle back next to him.
You shrug, “Nothing I didn’t already know.”
George grins at the two of you, “Is this the famous (Y/N) from your letters to mum?”
You nudge Fred with your elbow, beaming, “You write to your mum about me, magic man?”
“Hold on – magic man?” George asks, eyes glancing at both Fred and you.
You nod, “It’s my nickname for him.”
George chuckles, “It’s brilliant. I may have to use it myself.”
Fred blushes at his brother’s use of your nickname for him. He doesn’t say it, but it doesn’t sound right coming from anyone else’s mouth but yours.
“Anyway, it’s nice to meet you, (Y/N). Mum already loves you. I’m George.” George introduces, holding a hand out to you.
You shake his hand twice before dropping it, “It’s very nice to meet you too, George. Fred has told me so much.”
“He has?”
You nod, “He’s told me all about the pranks you played at Hogwarts and why you set up this shop – which I think is wonderful by the way – I feel like I already know you.”
George shifts his gaze to his twin, “I don’t know why but I didn’t think you’d talk about me.”
Fred gapes, “Of course I talk about you. You’re my twin brother, you’re practically half of me.”
George shrugs, “You only send letters to mum… I just assumed.”
Fred steps forward, placing his hands on George’s shoulders, “Mum made me promise to write, I couldn’t break that. I wanted to write to you so much, George, but the guilt I felt as just leaving you and the shop was too much and then more time passed. I’ve been an awful brother; can you forgive me?”
George laughs, tears falling freely down his face. “There’s nothing to forgive now that I know why.”
Fred hauls George into a hug; neither afraid to show their emotions through this reunion. Fred had been so worried before this; thinking his brother might turn him away at the door, but now holding him in his arms, he’s just happy to have his twin by his side once more.
They pull away with a sob; George clapping Fred on the back. “Will you be returning to work, Freddie?”
Fred’s eyes land on you; where you’ve stood silently through the whole exchange, just happy to see the two brothers reunite. His eyes search your face for something, and he finds it in your smile. “Yeah, George. I think I might do.”
George glances between you and Fred as if seeing the connection there. He keeps his mouth shut but smiles at the fact that his twin has found someone to share his life with.
You spend a couple more hours in the shop; pottering freely as Fred and George discuss the state of the business and when Fred would like to start work again. Pride runs through your veins as you listen to them from the upper floor; Fred has achieved so much in such a short space of time and you couldn’t be more prouder of him.
You also couldn’t be more in love with him. He handles himself with such grace; standing taller, smiling more. The more time you spent with him, the more you could feel yourself falling for him. Nights alone in your flat had you thinking of what it would be like to be laid in bed next to him – would he cuddle? Would he let you lay your head on his chest? Or would he prefer to spoon? You had spent so many nights thinking of these questions, trying to think of answers.
“(Y/N)?” Fred calls from the lower floor, “Are you ready to go?”
“Already?” You ask, descending the staircase.
Fred nods, “I’ll come back tomorrow and talk more to George about what I need to do. It’s time we got some lunch, however.”
Your stomach grumbles at his words, “You’ve got great timing it seems, magic man.”
He shakes his head, laughing softly, “No. I just know you too well.”
You smile at him before turning to George to say goodbye. George smiles at you, saying, “I’m sure we’ll be seeing each other very soon,” with a wink at Fred.
The tips of Fred’s ears burn red as he claps his twin on the shoulder, promising he’ll call in tomorrow. “Tell mum you’ve seen me, will you? I know she worries,” Fred calls on his way out.
“Already on it!” are George’s final words before the door closes.
----------------------
Sitting at a corner table in The Leaky Cauldron, Fred continues to ride on the high from seeing his twin brother after a year apart. He’s positively ravenous; the nerves before having dampened his appetite. He takes it upon himself to order for the both you; checking that you don’t mind. You wave him away, stating that you wouldn’t even know where to begin with ordering.
Tom hands Fred your drinks after ordering, letting him know it’d be around ten minutes before food was with you. Fred thanks the barman, picking up the drinks to return you.
“I’m really proud of you, Fred.” You state, taking a sip of the sweet Butterbeer.
“You are?” He asks bashfully.
“I am. It took a lot of bravery to do what you did today.”
Fred blushes, but doesn’t drop his eyes from yours. “I think I’m going to be brave one last time.”
“You are?”
“Yes,” He states, reaching for your hand, “I’ve only known you for less than six months but in that time you’ve helped me find who I was before the war. You’ve helped me find the laughter that was missing. What I’m trying to say is, is that I’ve fallen in love with you, (Y/N).”
“Oh, Fred,” You sniffle, “I love you too.”
“You do?”
You nod, “I really do. I love every last bit of you.
Fred sags in his chair; holding onto your hand tighter, “I was so worried you wouldn’t love me back.”
“No chance of that, magic man.”
The smile that breaks across his face is simply breathtaking, and you thank your lucky stars that the man you’ve fallen in love with, loves you back, just as much.
Tom fetches your food over then, settling two plates onto table. It smells divine and without letting go of Fred’s hand, you pick up your fork and dig in.
The meal is eaten in silence; happy looks and secret smiles exchanged over the steaming plates of food. Fred’s thumb rubs over the back of your hand; the motion now having another meaning alongside ‘I’m here’. Elation bubbles within you, flooding your veins. The love you feel for this man is entirely encompassing, filling your very pores, combining with your genetic makeup.
For as delicious as the meal is, the both of you barely taste it. Plates are empty in no time, and Fred leaves Tom a tip on the table. He pulls you up with him, dragging you to the door and back to muggle London.
It feels like a fever dream; stepping back into the reality you’ve known all your life until you met the red-headed man stood next to you.
Fred tugs you into him; his arm wrapping around your waist. He drops your hand in favour of caressing your cheek. His brown eyes sparkle with love and joy as he dips his head, pausing just before he touches his lips to yours, waiting for permission. You grant him in the form of pushing your mouth to his.
Your arms wrap around his neck, pulling him in close, feeling all of him pressed against all you. He tastes of the butterscotch from the dregs of his Butterbeer and you hum against his mouth – it’s intoxicating. He’s intoxicating; you could lose yourself entirely in him and you wouldn’t mind a bit. Your hand runs through his hair, tugging lightly. Your toes curl at the sound of the low moan from the back of his throat.
From the outside, this looks like a simple passionate embrace between a young couple. They don’t know how long this kiss has been in the making; how many time you’ve wondered exactly what Fred would taste like, and now you have that knowledge, it’s not something you’ll be parting with soon.
Eventually, you pull away from him, coming back to the surface for breath but Fred doesn’t let you go. He holds onto you tightly, pressing kiss after kiss to your face making you giggle at his affectionate side.
He lets you go for a single instant to pull you into the side street beside The Leaky Cauldron. He wraps you tightly into his side, savouring the feel of you lined next to him.
“This is going to make you dizzy,” is his only warning before he apparates back to your flat.
----------------
Though confessions have been uttered, Fred takes his time to learn your body.
Kissing you slowly; peeling your clothes off your body with the air of someone who has all the time in the world – and he does. He takes his time to memorise every inch of your body; every dip, every curve, every freckle. He commits it all to memory though the both of you know that you’ll be doing this for a very long time. He whispers words of worship into your skin; your body was a cathedral and he was going to worship at your feet.
You take your time with him; running your hand through the hair on his chest before trailing it lower, watching how the muscles in his toned stomach jump at your touch. A simple touch, and it drives him wild.
He draws you in for a kiss; flipping the both of you so you’re underneath him. He braces himself above and you spend the rest of the night, and most of the morning, learning the noises that can be evoked from a kiss in the right place.
-----------------
It surprised Fred that it takes his mother almost a month to send him a letter demanding that she finally get to meet the person who had stolen her son’s heart.
Fred reads the letter beside you at the breakfast table; chuckling at his mother’s words over his morning cup of tea. He hands you the letter once he’s finished reading, watching your face for every emotion as well as letting his gaze drop to the small purple bruises at the base of your neck, laid there by his mouth.
You hold a hand up to your mouth, repressing the smile. “Your mother wants to meet me?”
Fred nods, “She has for a while, but I didn’t want to scare you away.”
“There’s no chance of that now, magic man, especially after last night.”
Fred blushes but beams, satisfied. “Would you like to meet them?”
You pause, tilting your head to one side as you think of how to phrase your next few sentences, “I don’t want to presume anything, but I’d like to think I’m going to be in your life for a long while. I think the earlier I meet your family, the better.”
Fred takes your hand in his, dropping a kiss to the top of it. “You aren’t presuming anything; I want you in my life for an eternity and more. But are you sure you want to meet them? I’m from a very large family, and if I know them, it’ll be partners as well.”
You lean over to press a kiss to his cheek then to peck his lips quickly, “I love the worry, but it’s okay. I want to meet them, and I want to see pictures of my magic man as a baby.”
Fred groans; he’s forgotten about the baby pictures but from the look on your face, he know he’s fighting a losing battle. He kisses you quick, “I’ll send an owl to my mum now, letting her know we’ll come tomorrow, how does that sound?”
You hum happily, “That sounds like just enough time for me to find an outfit good enough.”
-----------------
Molly Weasley opened Fred’s letter with a shriek; rushing to reply before getting started on calling the family together. She sends her Patronus to Charlie in Romania; threatening death should he not return home for this occasion. Charlie replies within two hours by showing up on the doorstep with his girlfriend, Evie in tow.
The whole family under one roof again would be something of an event; and one Molly would not waste by having petty squabbles and nasty reminders. She lines her family up in the living room; boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands and wives and proceeds to lecture about what this means. She’s grateful it being a Friday evening so she can lecture the whole family without absentees claiming work as the excuse.
Halfway through her lecture to her family, Arthur places a soft hand on her shoulder, “Molly, dear, we’re going to be on our best behaviour.”
She whimpers, “I haven’t seen my son is so long, Arthur.”
He wraps an arm around his wife’s shoulder, knowing the toll Fred’s absence took on her. He had been the unexpected twin; but they didn’t love him any less for it. On the contrary, Molly loved him more for the fear of his siblings making him feel unwanted.
“I know, dear. But we all promise to be on our bestest behaviour, don’t we gang?”
Confirmation rings out across all six of their children and their partners. Molly levels them all with a look, “Fred is bringing his muggle girlfriend with him, and George has told me it’s serious. We aren’t going to have a problem with that are we?”
“Definitely not,” George calls out to the agreement of his siblings and siblings-in-law, “(Y/N) is a sweetheart; you’ll see the moment they both arrive.”
Molly dismisses her family; dispersing them to different rooms with different jobs to make the house presentable for Fred and (Y/N)’s visit tomorrow.
-------------------
Tomorrow arrives quickly, and before you know it, the sun is shining through your window and the birds have begun their morning song. Fred’s arm hangs over your waist in a dead weight; you shift him gently as you make your way out of your bed and into the bathroom to begin your day.
By the time Fred wakes, you’re dressed and are brushing through your hair. With a lazy grin, he watches you get ready for the day. He’s in utter awe of how he met someone like you, but then you meet his eyes in the mirror and that awe transforms into something warmer.
He drags himself out of the warm bed desperate to feel you under his hands. He places his hands on your shoulder, dropping a soft kiss to the top of your head.
“Good Morning,” He whispers, his voice still raspy with sleep, “You look beautiful.”
You hum, “Good Morning sleepy head. The kettle boiled a few minutes ago and there’s a teabag waiting in your favourite pot.”
“You’re a dream,” Fred calls out, pottering into the kitchen.
“And you’re a flatterer, magic man,” You call back; grinning when you hear his laughter.
Time flies by in a rush of breakfast, clothes, and kisses and before you know it, it’s time to apparate all the way to Devon.
“Are you ready?” Fred asks; your hand tight in his. You don’t miss the double meaning to his words.
“Take me to Devon, magic man,” is all you reply before your flat turns into a whirlpool of blended colours and you’re spat back out on the outskirts of green, green farmland.
Not letting go of your hand, Fred leads you in the direction of his childhood home. Air he hasn’t smelt in over a year wash over him, bringing with it a tidal wave of memories. Nostalgia settles within him as he glances down at you to gauge your reaction to his home.
The Burrow stands proudly in the valley between two hills. You gasp at the sheer height of it, “This is where you grew up?”
Fred nods, eyes on you, “It is. I lived here until I moved to London.”
“It’s incredible,” You whisper, taking a step forward, and then another, and then another until you break through the long grass into a clearing. A garage is situated to the left of the large house, and you can just make out the canes for a vegetable garden. You nod as if understanding every motive for the placement of everything; if you were to live somewhere like here, you’d too grow your own food.
Fred draws your attention back to him by speaking, “Through there is where we practice Quidditch; the game I told you about from Hogwarts?” He continues when he sees you nod, “Then behind there is a pond that a family of frogs live in. To the right of us is mum’s garden, it’s her pride and hoy – she excels at household charms, but she’s a wonder in the garden too.”
“Fred, this place is incredible. I already love it and I haven’t even met your family.”
Fred smiles, “You won’t need to wait very long; here’s George.”
You turn from the sight of the growing vegetables to see George making his way over to you. “Fred! (Y/N)! How are you?” he calls out.
Fred waves at his twin, leading you to him. “We’re good, Georgie. How is everyone?”
George beams at his twin and then you, “They’re beside themselves with excitement. Mum screeched when she got your letter; gave us a lecture on decorum and everything.”
Fred laughs; his heart swelling with love and fondness for the woman who had raised him with such love and care.
“What do you say, (Y/N)?” George starts, “Ready to meet the Weasley clan?”
You grin at George and then at Fred; utterly besotted by this man, “Lead the way.”
George claps his hands before turning his back on you, heading towards the open door. You follow him at a faster pace than the one you had done when walking up to the house. Eagerness settling in your stomach as you keep your eyes on the open door.
Fred keeps pace with you easily; both nerves and excitement coursing through his veins.
He hears his mother before he sees her, “Fred! My darling,” she cries, tackling him into a hug so tight Fred thinks his ribs might break. You pause next to him; Fred’s arm angled awkwardly as he hugs his mum with one arm – you move to let go of his hand so he can hug his mother properly, but his hold on you tightens.
“Hi Mum, I’ve missed you,” Fred says at the sound of her cries, “I’m home mum, and I’m starving so let’s get something to eat, shall we? I’ve missed your cooking too much.”
Molly wipes her eyes, running them over her son, “I think you have. You’re looking far too thin, darling,” Her eyes land on you; they widen for a second before she’s tackling you in a hug. She whispers, “Thank you” in your ear before saying much louder, “I’m so glad I finally get to meet you, dear. I’ve read so much about you I feel I know you already but it’s never the same thing.”
You return her hug with just as much vigour, “Thank you for having me, I love your home.”
Molly pulls away, “You’re lovely; you’re perfect for Fred, I know it. Come on in, it’s time we ate, and you can meet the rest of the family.”
Your stomach ties itself in knots as you follow Fred into his childhood home. Voices starts to shout upon the sight of Fred entering the home; he grins at them all, greeting them by name, passing out kiss after kiss on the cheek as well as hugs to his brothers.
Then it’s all silent as the crowd turns to you. Fred’s hand drops your and his arm wraps around your waist, “Everyone this is (Y/N). Please be nice, I’m rather fond as you’ve probably heard from mum and George.”
Everyone greets you as if you’ve been part of the family for years; kisses on cheeks and tight hugs as everyone introduces themselves. A dream of your since you were child was to have  a large family, and now with Fred, it seems as if that dream would finally be possible.
His arm rests on the back of your chair as the family take their seats at the table. The food is served with loudness and love; Molly taking extra care with her cooking to make sure it’s perfect for you. From your first bite, you understand what Fred was on about all those months ago. After eating Molly’s food, you would be ruined for anyone else’s.
It’s wonderful; they take you in with open arms, ignoring the fact that you’re a muggle because to them, it doesn’t matter. They aren’t bothered whether you have magic or not, just that you love Fred and make him happy.
------------------
After the meal, Fred watches you interact with his family; explaining to his father the purpose of your degrees and your plans for the future as Arthur sits there entirely enraptured. He watches you asking Charlie question after question about Dragons with Charlie only being too happy to answer – his girlfriend Evie chiming in every now and then with her own knowledge on the subject matter.
He watches you talk animatedly; eyed wide and hands gesturing wildly, fitting in with his family better than he could have dreamed of.
Sighing happily, Fred realises three things:
One – his family would always be there for him, no matter the issue. They’re there to help, to never hinder.
Two – he’s still healing. It will be a long time before he’s recovered from the war, and he’s accepted that.
And three – he’s moving forward with all that in tow because he’s found the love of his life and he’s finally ready to start living it.
*********
General (HP) taglist: @chaotic-fae-queen​ @obsessedwithrandomthings​ @harrypotter289​ @dreamer821​ @kalimagik​ @heloisedaphnebrightmore​ @nebulablakemurphy​ @the-hufflefluffwriter​ @figlia--della--luna​ @bforbroadway​ @idont-knowrn​ @summer-writes​ @big-galaxy-chaos​ @black-lake-confessions​ @annasofiaearlobe​ 
Fred Weasley taglist: @susceptible-but-siriusexual
2K notes · View notes
bakugohoex · 3 years
Note
CONGRATS ON 1K!!! For the event, could you do Bakugo with Fluff #4??? It just seems so much like him
“because i’m fucking in love with you”
Tumblr media
pairing: katsuki bakugo x female reader
cw: language, fluff, kissing
word count: 2500+
a/n: i have to write a levi oneshot now, bruh i might just go sleep, who knows what i’m going to do
summary: in which bakugo watches you get too close with another man and can’t help but let his anger take over seeing you with anybody other him
1k event masterlist
↞ back to my hero academia masterlist
Tumblr media
Bakugo had many reasons to get angry on a warm summer day at the office. Being a pro hero had its ups and downs, the down being what was occurring today. Paperwork, he hated it with a passion, he loved the idea of fighting and defeating villains but the idea of writing it all up made his skin itch in disgust. Of course he had his sidekicks to help him, but they would never know the true extent of having to re-read over fights that occurred and signing it all off.
Bakugo still had other reasons that annoyed him, the weather had become broiling, his sidekicks were pissing him off and then there was you. You with your hero costume that looked tighter every time he saw it, you with the way you’d walk into a room and have everybody on your feet. You who had whipped him like a servant boy, he hated having to work alongside you. You had your own agency a couple blocks away from him, but ever since you both found out you took the same route. You’d come and annoyingly meet him throughout the day.
He hated it, and as he signed off on another report, his V neck not helping him at all, he heard the sounds of chatting from outside his office, that's when he saw it through the glass. The way you flaunted past the desks with your skimpy hero costume which he understood was for the best possible use of your quirk. But even then, it always cupped your body in just the right places. 
You seemed to have been waving at one of the new sidekicks Bakugo had recruited. He hated it, pen almost breaking from his anger, he watched as you didn't bother to knock only cascade inside with the looks of others following your pristine body. “What?”
“How rude, Bakugo! Is that any way to greet your favourite pro hero.” You mocked falling onto the chair with a hefty sign, he watched at how you were clearly out of breath with the way your chest heaved harshly. 
“Shut it, extra. What do you want?” He repeated.
You began playing with the stuff on his desk, he’d noticed how you always needed something in your hands and since he had always left a small jelly like plushie just for these moments. You happily put it in your hand pulling and stretching at it before looking up at him, “are you not coming for the patrol?”
“I got paperwork.” He signed as you saw the almost boxful of papers. 
“No fair, I'll just go on my own then.” You were about to stand up when he stopped you. 
“Get one of your sidekicks to go, idiot, help me with this.” He gestured to the paperwork that he knew wasn't the full extent as you both had decided to split it.
You gave another huff at him, “just because I’m organised doesn't mean i want to spend my Monday morning doing dreary paperwork.”
“I know you split it 70:30 so fucking help me.” He growled loudly making a shiver run down your spine. 
“So needy, Bakugo, let me just call them.” You gesture to your phone as you walked outside his office. You leant against the glass door, Bakugo’s eyes fixed to the way your ass and thighs had been pushed against the wall. He licked his lips as he stared longley at your body before hearing your sign. 
That's when he saw his new sidekick come up to you, of course he knew that the sidekick was only a couple years younger than the two of you. But he had a crush, the way his eyes lingered across your body, the way he passed you the coffee which you hadn’t even asked for. The way you laughed at his shitty joke, were you really flirting back with a man like that, Bakugo scowled before directing his eyes back to the paperwork. 
“I’ll make sure to come for you when I need some coffee.” You laughed at the boy as you opened the glass door. 
Bakugo heard the boy give a chuckle touching your arm as he let you go through the door. “Here do you want some?” You gestured to the coffee you had, noticing the empty coffee mug on the side of his desk. 
“No.” Bakugo muttered but nevertheless took the coffee and drank a large gulp of it. “Why don’t you get your little coffee boy to bring more?”
He was pissed not only had you let his stupid sidekick touch you, but you’d made him feel special as if he had your attention. “Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.” You chucked the cup in the bin, going over to the box where you grabbed some files out. 
Bakugo didn’t make a remark instead letting you read over what had occurred and sign it off. “Bakugo.” You whispered halfway through your first file and already bored. “Bakugo.”
“What?” He questioned after he had seen you become more concentrated in the pen you held than the paperwork itself.
You stared at him with a bright smile, “we should get some lunch.”
“Y/n, it’s only half 10, it's a bit early for lunch.” He scowled, chucking the finished file into the complete pile.
“But I’m hungry.” You whined leaning against the cold desktop, it was white and probably made from marble, but it was the best bet of comfort you’d get from Bakugo’s office. 
“Go get some food then.” He muttered as you stood up all giddy. “Get me something as well.”
“Now who’s the hungry one.” You mocked as you happily skipped out of his office, he couldn't help but roll his eyes and give a slight smile to you. But that’s when he saw his stupid sidekick come up to you. His face faulted, his smile turning downwards as he watched you both converse and leave to the elevator.
“You really don’t have to come.” You spoke stepping into the elevator, you hated how vulnerable you felt with Bakugo, how easily he could stare at you and make you go weak at the knees. He was perfect, an amazing pro hero who was ahead of you in the charts by the couple of numbers. You were almost grateful that your paths had crossed and that you spent patrols together, but his sidekicks were a whole other thing. 
You knew the coffee boy had a crush; the whole department knew that. But how could you let a sweet boy down after all he did was such good things, how could you tell him you’d rather have his asshole of a boss than a sweetheart like him. “No, it’s fine, I was going that way anyway.”
“Oh why?” You questioned through the long elevator ride down.
“I had to buy some stuff for my sister's birthday and I'm on my break.” You nodded happily, not asking anymore through the uncomfortable silence as soon as the door dinged open, you both walked out, he had walked you to the bakery as you were craving a sandwich, he waited as you picked one you liked and one that Bakugo definitely likes. He didn't say a word until you spoke. 
“What are you thinking of getting your sister?” You asked walking with him into the store selling gifts. 
“What do you like, I mean girls like?” A heavy blush formed on his face as you began looking through the gifts. 
“I’d probably go for that drinks set, it’s cute if she of course drinks that is.”
He quickly spoke to ease your gaze, “she does.” He instantly grabs it going to pay, you didn't question his rash decision and you both walked back to the building. 
“I’m sure she’ll love it.” You smile out as you both step through the office again, Bakugo in an instant saw the two of you, bags in hand. 
“I hope so, thank you Y/n.” He smiles putting his hand on your shoulder, he goes in for a hug which you happily give, he was clearly nervous for his sister's birthday. Bakugo watched intensively, surprised at the hug as he stormed out of the doors of his office on a mission to grab you and take you with him. 
“Y/n.” He bellowed out. 
You both retreated from the hug, staring at the angry blond, “Bakugo, i bought sandwiches.” You happily smile out, rummaging through the bag to show him it, “and cupcakes.”
His face fell, a smile erupting that he didn't know he was even capable of, you looked so happy showing him the cupcakes with the pink frosting on them. “Come on.” He whispered watching you come beside him, his arm on your back guiding you inside. 
Bakugo guided you inside, watching you happily pull out the food, he saw how you moved the chair for visitors beside him making him move up. You were closer than he had expected, leaning across to grab the cupcakes and stuff one in your face. “You looked angry before?”
“I wasn't.” He muttered while taking a bite of the sandwich. 
“Don’t lie to me, what’s up?” You began to play with his other hand, he hadn't expected it but the way your hands had just met his own, the way you skimmed his veins and the rings that embodied his fingers. It felt like heaven, but your eyes gave a sense of doubt and resistance. 
“I...I just don’t like you spending time with that guy.” He spoke staring at you, your eyesight was on his hand still, the way you continued to play with his fingers before moving to the back of his hand. 
You took a sharp breath before speaking to yourself, “is it because of his crush on me?”
“You know about that?” 
“Of course I know Bakugo, I think everybody knows about it.” You whispered out softly.
“Is he your type?” Bakugo had gone against his words of jealousy, maybe if you admitted you liked coffee boy then he could move on more easily. 
You finally looked up at the blond, his piercing red eyes giving a look of caution, “he should be.”
“What the fuck does that mean?” Bakugo moved his hand away from you, your unclear answer had made him a lot more pissed at the idea of you stringing both the men along. 
“I...I just mean that he’s nice y’know and he should be my type, but he’s not.” Bakugo’s anger seemed to calm down as he gave you a softer look. 
“Who is then?” Bakugo went to grab the cupcake you had bought for him ,taking a soft bite as the sweet frosting enchanted his mouth.
“You have frosting on your lips.” Bakugo went to lick it as you avoided his question entirely. 
“Y/n, who’s your type?” Bakugo repeated staring at you, in an instant you stood up not wanting to confess anything else. 
“I’m going to go see how my guys are doing.” You left him with no other word, he couldn't even stop you at how you almost ran away from the situation. Even if he had found out you didn't like the coffee boy you were now avoiding him which felt a lot worse.
Bakugo tried calling you but it went to miss call, he ended up finishing the rest of the paperwork and by the end of the day he knew you’d probably be hung up in your office, pushing yourself to do something other than talk to him. He began walking the short distance in the humid air, the sun was just about to set as he arrived at your agency. He always liked the vibe you had going on, even your sidekicks were okay, a lot better than his own. He was able to get inside with ease, walking the steps towards your office, he could see your shadow through the frosted glass. 
You seemed to be pacing on the phone to someone, but he couldn’t tell who until he was just in ear shot. “I can’t tell him that, he’s going to think these months have just been me being selfish.”
Bakugo couldn’t hear the other line but it raised more questions in the boys mind instead. He was careful about being unseen until he heard you continue. “He’s a fucking idiot, how could someone like him ever love me, I’m nothing special.”
He heard another long sign from you at the response from the other side before hearing you say your farewells and begin to pace about the room. Bakugo softly knocked against the door, hearing a come in as he walked inside, your office being as pristine as ever. You were no longer wearing your hero costume, assuming you had been on a patrol yourself at the tiredness that set in your eyes.
He saw you as a normal civilian at this moment, so sweet and innocent but you gave a glare. “How long were you listening in for?”
“I...I wasn't.” He stuttered out. 
“Bullshit, why the fuck were you listening into my private conversation?” You scowled again leaning against your desk.
Bakugo knew he was caught but in his idiocrasy decided to make the situation worse, “who’s the guy you’re talking about?”
“Why do you care?” You spoke stubbornly.
“Y/n, who’s the guy?” He repeated himself.
You faced the blond scowl on your face at his relentless pushing of an answer. “It’s nobody okay, I don’t even understand why you care so much?”
Bakugo’s anger rose at you hiding even more from him, how could he work alongside you if you were just going to keep him in the dark about some stupid guy that probably meant fuck all in the big picture. He knew this wasn't the true reason behind his anger though, he was jealous, some man you loved didn't love you back, and he was here with all his love to give.
“Because I’m fucking in love with you.” Bakugo shouted, the words spewing out without even realising. Bakugo’s eyes widened and so did your own, he looked at how your eyes had almost softened at the confession.
“You...You love me?” You questioned standing up to come closer to him. 
“I’m not repeatin…”
You quickly interrupt him, your bodies almost touching as your hand moves to his face making him stare right back at you. “I love you too.” You softly whispered before closing the gap between the two of you. His hand moved to your face guiding the kiss as he had to bend down to even meet you.
It was filled with passion and drive from the countless nights you both spent together in each other's office, the morning patrols together and even the galas you attended together as friends. Everything you both had wanted from each other had come down from a singular kiss in a small office in the middle of Japan.
A small moan escaped your lips, his tongue gliding in with such ease as he toyed with your own, almost sucking the spit and saliva that was across your own tongue. He let go taking a harsh breath and he brought your face closer to his, foreheads touching as he gave the softest look he possibly could. You stayed in his arms, just staring at each other with such love and passion, both knowing nothing could break you both now.
Tumblr media
i’d really appreciate if you guys could leave a like, reblog or comment, thanks x
if you guys want to be a part of a tag list, just reply to any post and i’ll add you xx
@samusimp @alainarose13 @crispychannie @underratedmage @jennammaee @cathy8taffy @sugacious @moonlightaangel @kat-sukis-hoe @effmigentlywithachainsaw @swankiifiied @maat-the-prescriptive @missmultifangirl @tvwhoresblog @kuroos-world @chrrylevi @katsuhera @answer-the-sirens @animexholic @wapbenders @the-shota-king-masayuki @bakugousmrs @crystal-lilac @dai-tsukki-desu @fandomsinthegalaxies @crimsonbows-and-arrows @admin-in-residence @otterlockholmes @gabrann
447 notes · View notes
clareguilty · 3 years
Text
Juniper and Pine
read it here on the AO3
A/N: Im so glad Geralt is sterile bc i hate pregnancy but love breeding kinks. I barely know anything about the witcher but I know I wanna suck this man dry like a capri sun.
Geralt of Rivia/Reader Rating: Explicit | smut, breeding, reader has a coochie and hair long enough to braid Word Count: ~2300
You found him at the inn. Shrouded in shadow, tucked away in the back just as always. Two flagons before him, one empty and the other half full. He had likely already eaten his fill.
 You sat across from him, ordering your own food and drink. Neither of you spoke.
 He watched you. Mostly hidden by your cloak, he watched your hands as you cut your meat and sipped your ale. Caught a glimpse of your eyes when you chanced to meet his gaze.
 Tension radiated from him. The set of his shoulders, the clench of his jaw. Icy rain pelted against the nearby window. The wind groaned lowly outside.
 A group of men erupted in spontaneous cheers on the other side of the inn, and he turned quickly to glare at them unnoticed before turning back to his intent study of you.
 So you studied him right back. Watching him from beneath the hood of your cloak as you ate. The meat wasn’t as warm as you would have liked but it was much appreciated after your many days of travel.
 He hadn’t shaved in a few days. And silver scruff was filling in along his jaw. His hair was pulled back away from his face, and you watched the crease in his forehead occasionally deepen as he considered you. He was unarmored, though he still had with him a sword smaller than the greatswords he usually traveled with. His arms were bare, his sleeves pushed up to the elbow, and his dark shirt was half unfastened down the front. He must have been unaffected by the cold winds and rain that had overtaken you on your journey.
 Your plate was cleared. Your cup was empty. You handed the barkeep your coins and offered your sweetest smile. Still, they scurried away when he stood, looming behind you. He had pulled his own cloak on, and you could feel the heat of him against your back.
 You walked in front, but he was leading you. As you navigated the muddy, moonlit streets, he silently directed you. A heavy wooden door, a cold dark corridor. His footsteps behind you. You stepped into the room and heard the bolt set in place.
 You unfastened your cloak, folding it neatly and laying it across the back of a chair.
 “You were supposed to arrive at sundown,” he said. You glanced to see him standing before the fire, eyes focused on the flames. They reflected the light like molten gold.
 “I’m sorry for keeping you waiting. A storm slowed me down.” It wasn’t a lie. The weather had not been kind the last few days of your journey. You unfastened your belt, leaving it with your cloak, and pulled the plaits from your hair, combing your finger through the strands.
 “Did you keep to the river?” he asked.
 You hadn’t.
 You were glad you were turned away from him so he couldn’t see your face. You know he had asked you to travel along the water, keeping to the valley. He was right that it was safer, but there were reasons for you to travel through the forest. Reasons he disapproved of.
 Fingers shaking, you started on the lacing of your surcoat.
 He stepped away from the fire, moving to stand behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. You leaned back against him, relaxing as he pressed his nose to your hair. His hands took over for yours as he undid the lacing. You trailed your fingers over his arms.
 “I smell the spruce of the mountains,” he said.
 You froze.
 “Juniper.” He inhaled again, breathing in the scent of the forest that you had unwittingly woven into your hair.
 He loosened the last of your laces and placed his hands over yours, holding you by your wrists.
 “I can smell the North on you.”
 Damn witchers. Damn them and their ridiculous senses. You tried to tug away from his hold, but he held you still.
 “You disobeyed me,” he said. “And then you lied to me. Your heart hasn’t stopped racing.”
 The rapid beat of your heart was only partially because of your dishonesty. He just had that effect on you. Surely he would know that by now.
 “Geralt-”
 He spun you quickly, backing you against the wall and leaning forward until his gaze was level with yours. His knuckles pressed to your throat, forcing you to lift your chin. “I told you it’s dangerous to travel the mountains alone.”
 “I had to go,” you insisted. “It didn’t take me any longer to travel, and I made it back just fine.”
 “And you thought I wouldn’t know?” His voice was low, a rumbling growl right beside your ear.
 “I thought it would be best to ask forgiveness than permission.” You raised your head, firm in your decision.
 “Of course,” Geralt scoffed. “It was foolish of me to even try and stop you.”
 “It was,” you agreed. You moved to step forward, to wrap your arms around him and bury your face in his chest. You had missed him, and you wanted to be close to him. He kept you pinned to the wall.
 “I believe you were supposed to be begging for my forgiveness?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.
 Your eyes widened.
 “Go on then,” Geralt shoved you to your knees. “Beg.”
 Your knees would surely bruise from how hard you hit the floor. You reached forward to brace yourself on his thighs. He was watching you with smug satisfaction, already reaching to remove his belts and unfasten his trousers.
 You watched his hands, eager for what was to come. Your lips were already parted, tongue swiping over them unconsciously. Geralt chuckled and pulled his cock free.
 You stroked him gently at first, swiping your thumb over the tip and squeezing all the way down to the base. He was so thick your fingers couldn’t meet around him, but you didn’t mind. You loved the way his hips moved as you twisted your wrist. His stomach tensed and he inhaled with a hiss.
 He quickly grew bored of just your hand, though. His fingers threaded through your hair before he tugged sharply, pulling you towards his cock. You wrapped your lips around him obediently. Slowly, he pulled you farther down his length. Each movement of your tongue or lips earned you a reaction from him, and you turned your eyes up to watch his expression change.
 "You're going to take it all," he said, his voice low and rough.
 You moaned, eager to do exactly as he said. He rocked his hips forward at the same time he pulled you in by your hair, and you were silenced as he forced his cock down your throat.
 It was rough. Punishing. Exactly what you had earned by disobeying him. You weren't sure that obedience was worthwhile when this is what you got from going against his orders. You loved the scratch of his calloused fingers against your scalp and the low moans that escaped him every time you wrapped your lips around the base of his cock. He was taking his pleasure however he wanted, selfishly fucking your mouth.
 And you were dripping down your thighs with arousal. Geralt was so strong and ruthless -- but rarely with you. It was seldom you got to see him this way and you loved it. He must have missed you while you were away.
 "You’re an eager little whore aren’t you,” he growled, holding you down on his cock so he could fuck your throat. “Disobedient. Stubborn. Look at you.”
 Your eyes brimmed with tears, cheeks hot and flushed as you let him use you.
 “I’m close,” he groaned, eyes fluttering shut and head tipping back. His pace quickened, and then faltered. You held as still as you could as he finished down your throat.
 He pulled away as gently as possible, carding his fingers through your disheveled hair as you gasped and coughed. You nearly collapsed on the stone floor, but he was quick to catch you, taking you into his arms and pulling you to his chest. You let your fingers trail over the skin exposed along his collar. He pressed his lips to your hairline, carrying you to the wide, low bed that occupied the far wall. You pulled him down alongside you before he could get very far.
 “I need you,” you whispered, voice raspy. He let slip one of his rare smiles, pointed teeth gleaming in the low light, and you did your best to commit it to memory.
 “I can’t believe you took the mountain path in such a short amount of time,” he said, stretching out long on the bed and pulling you to lay against his chest.
 “I didn’t want you to know. It only takes four days to travel through the valley.”
 “Yes, and it takes six or eight to take the mountains. It’s impressive really.” His fingers absently searched out any bare skin they could reach, tracing idle shapes into your skin. “You’re nothing but trouble.”
 “I keep things exciting,” you teased. “But maybe I could put in a little more work to earn your forgiveness.” You let your hand trail over his chest, across his hard stomach and back over the fasten of his trousers.
 He raised an eyebrow. You could tell he was interested from the way his cock twitched beneath your palm. Sitting up, you removed the rest of your clothes. Geralt’s eyes never left you. It wasn’t until he caught sight of the glistening mess between your thighs that he moved.
 He was on you before you blink, looming over your back as he pressed a hand between your legs. “I could smell that you wanted me, but I didn’t know it was this bad.” He rubbed your pussy with the pads of his fingers. “You’re so needy. Like a bitch in heat.” His voice was right in your ear, warm breath fanning over your skin.
 You whined, rocking your hips against his hand. He pulled away just long enough to drag his shirt over his head and fling it away. His teeth latched onto your shoulder lightly as he pushed his trousers off as well. He pressed his cock against your ass, chuckling low as you pushed back to meet him, desperate to be filled.
 “Geralt, please,” you moaned.
 “Ah, so now you beg.” His voice was light and you wished you could see his smile. He settled his hands on your hips, lining himself up and sinking into you with a slow thrust of his hips. God, he was big. “You want me to breed you? To fill you up? Is that what you think you deserve?”
 He was enjoying himself. He wasn’t usually so talkative, and you loved the sound of his voice in your ear as he pounded into you.
 “Yes, please,” you nodded. He pressed you into the bed, pinning you beneath him and holding your hips so he could fuck you as hard as he liked. It was a blinding, delirious pleasure that you let yourself fall into, surrounded by Geralt, safe, protected.
 He pulled you from your haze by reaching to press two fingers to your clit. You came almost immediately. He didn’t let up as you shook through your orgasm, clenching around his cock and crying out in pleasure.
 “That’s it,” he said, never slowing the pace of his hips. “You’re going to come for me again.”
 It didn’t seem possible. You were already so overwhelmed. But he changed the motion of his fingers, and you felt it building again. He was getting close as well. You could tell by the way he occasionally slowed to savor the feeling of you around him, almost immediately followed by a blinding pace as he chased his own pleasure.
 His grip on your hip tightened, his teeth sinking into your shoulder once more as he rutted against you. The sharp sting of his canines made you gasp. Spurred on by his own impending orgasm, he pressed harder to your clit. Your eyes rolled back as his rough fingers, slick with your own arousal, dragged you to a second climax.
 He came as you did. His hips pressed tightly against yours as you shuddered and collapsed beneath him. You could feel his cock twitching inside you, filling you with his seed.
 A long moment of quiet, just the sound of your heaving breaths and the crackle of the fireplace. You melted onto the bed, stretching your limbs out long and sinking into a blissed out daze. Geralt wasn’t much better, laying half on top of you with his cock still buried inside. His breathing was evening out and you feared he would fall asleep.
 “Geralt,” you mumbled half-heartedly.
 “Mhm,” he responded, chest rumbling with the sound. You thought he was going to ignore you, but he moved after a second, pulling out of you with a hiss and searching for a way to clean up your mess. You rolled over, listening to your pulse gradually quiet and slow.
 It wasn’t much later that you were beneath the coverlet, once again nestled against Geralt’s side as he lay still. You weren’t sure if he was sleeping, his eyes were closed and his breaths so even and slow. You admired the softness in his features that you almost never got to see. It was only at times like this that you could catch him without a stern expression.
 “What are you looking at,” he asked, not opening his eyes.
 “You.” You splayed a palm over his chest. “I like it when you look happy.”
 “I am happy,” he said, not moving. “You make me happy.”
 You were glad he wasn’t looking so he couldn’t see the effect his words had on you. Your face grew hot, and you couldn’t hide your giddy smile. Curling tighter against him, you rested your head against his chest and let your eyes drift closed. “You make me happy, too,” you whispered.
Tip Jar: (please please please consider tipping!)
Ko-fi | Paypal
Masterlist of my other fics
466 notes · View notes