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coeurify · 7 months

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LACY, OH LACY

ellie williams.

·˚ ༘ * “like ribbons in your hair, my stomach’s all in knots. you got the one thing that i want."

pairing: ellie williams x f!reader. summary: you’ve got the one thing ellie wants, and it’s rotting her thoughts of you. based on lacy by olivia rodrigo. warning: my first go at true angst, but a happy ending! i took a much sadder direction with the song lol. reader is described as having a father figure. looks of reader never described beside that there’s ribbons in their hair. they/them pronouns used. for a GUTS writing challenge in writing server!

Envy was a nasty thing. Ellie knew that. Ellie knew that the way her lip curled down upon the sight of your frame disappearing into the Tipsy Bison in Jackson was unfair.

Ellie knew that the way her body tensed whenever you were followed quickly by an older man, one who grumbled and wiped at his sleepy eyes, wasn’t fair. The way she turned on her heel and walked away each time she saw you two, the pebbles under the toe of her converse being kicked away, that wasn’t fair either.

But god, did it tie her stomach in tiny little knots, ones that made it hard to swallow, hard to look away when your shining eyes met her’s across the street somedays.

Sometimes, she tries to blame it on sleep. She tells herself the angry feeling bubbling in her stomach is simply a result of the sleepless nights. Of the shaking and panting breaths that shoot from her as she awakes from another never ending nightmare.

But most days, she realizes it’s only an excuse. This sick feeling is reserved only for you, and Ellie wishes she could swallow it down like a shot, but it instead pools in her mouth, poisoning her movements, her thoughts, her everything around you.

When you smile the smile Ellie knew all too well, It only made her feel worse. It shouldn’t, really, Ellie should quirk her lips up in response, wave you over maybe. Joel would have insisted. But lately she just raised a hand in a softer, colder response before finding a new corner to escape down.

Hell, if Joel was here, if things were different, he would have tilted his chin up knowingly when Ellie’s own chin jutted down at the sight of you, her cheeks painted pink with something akin to affection, rather than the near constant shade of frighteningly pale her face seemed to be lately.

He had done so a million times.

When Ellie was only a measly sixteen, telling Joel she just couldn't let you stay the night while Joel and your old man went on a particularly long patrol.

“I barely even know them!” Ellie had fought, her arms crossed over the quickly beating heart in her chest. She knew you, she knew you liked to wear ribbon in your hair, she knew your favorite color was blue because your favorite shoes were that color, and she knew you were pretty. So fucking pretty, the kind that made her stomach turn all mushy and gross when she tried to talk to you over the semi regular shared dinners Joel and a few other older men around town had insisted upon.

Joel just shook his head, seemingly fighting back one of those chuckles that made it sound like he knew something Ellie didn’t. Ellie hated when he did that. “You know them well enough, kid.” was all Joel had responded, patting Ellie’s slumped back.

Joel did it when you coaxed Ellie out of her little garage for dinner inside of Joel’s, a few years later. He would never say anything, not when he could barely get Ellie to say hello anymore, but a look was all that was needed. Green meeting a more tired looking brown for just a split second, and Ellie knew. Joel saw right through the nervous looks Ellie threw your way, saw through how Ellie insisted on totally platonically complimenting you every time you walked through the door. Ellie’s knees were always pointed your way at the table, and Joel always saw.

“They’re pretty,” Joel said later that night, voice careful as he watched Ellie, who watched the dishes she silently cleaned off the table. “Sweet too, too sweet for a hell like this.” Joel could barely finish the words before he heard the creak of the door, before the house was quiet again.

The last time you were brought up, Ellie remembers being cold. She’s often cold now, but the night on the porch was one of the first truly cold nights in Jackson. It stung her nose while she walked outside of the Tipsy Bison, leaving a crowd of shocked faces.

She felt stupid, so stupid that it made the wind feel even icier against her skin. God, why did she have to dance with Dina? Her eyes had been settled on you all fucking night, but Dina was always a firecracker, always tugging Ellie to dance or talk loudly at the bar top. Ellie couldn’t stop heaving as she slammed the door. Did you think they were together too? Did you think Dina was leaning in to kiss her like Seth thought? Dina wasn’t. Ellie wanted to tell you that as soon as Dina’s lips came to her ear, “They’re watching, El.”

But Seth broke the dance before Ellie could. Joel only made it worse in Ellie eyes, and yet you still followed her out the building.

Of course you did.

“Ellie,” she remembers you saying so softly, as if she might break if you had raised your voice even a little. Maybe she would have, she was a fragile thing that night, something easily crushed in your hands. Hands that had been gripped by yours outside the Bar that night.

You were the only one who didn’t look at her like she had two heads after the Seth incident, after her face had gone red at the sight of Joel. Her harsh words to the older man didn’t scare you away, didn’t make you crumble her between your finger tips.

“You should talk to him.” Your breath hit her face, the only warmth in that fucking air, and ellie remembers smelling something that was just as delicate as a pastry, maybe a perfume your father found on a patrol, maybe just you.

You cared. Something Ellie had convinced herself otherwise of, something that didn’t make sense in her mind. Why did you have any worry about she and Joel? How did it concern you at all? But it did, and Ellie listened to you.

Ellie walked up that frosted porch, arms swinging nervously, searching for space on the wooden railing. Ellie let Joel join her, let him ask about you.

“You like them?” Joel’s hands cupped his coffee, his head tilted Ellie’s way.

Ellie remembers so vividly how she turned away, tucking her chin near her shoulder. “I’m so stupid.”

Ellie could see how Joel’s head shook lightly, “You ain’t. They’d be lucky to have you.”

Ellie wishes she answered him that night, wishes she would have sat back on the porch, wishes she didn’t call him an asshole. Ellie wishes a lot of things about that night. Maybe she would have hugged him, if she had known. Maybe she would have started that conversation with forgiveness, rather than a hint of it, thrown at the end of her scrambled words, swallowed by her eyes she willed not to cry.

Ellie wishes for a lot of things, but she knows it’s useless.

Just as useless as avoiding you, now.

You had worn a black ribbon in your hair, the day of Joel’s burial. You had hugged Ellie so tightly, and Ellie almost could feel the heartbeat she swore she lost.

“I’m so sorry,” you had blubbered into her solid frame, and she almost tucked her nose into the skin of your neck, almost let the scent of your perfume calm her. But she just thanked you, pulled back and wiped one of her shaking thumbs over your tear streaked face. She was wiping your tears that day, and somehow it felt like the only right thing to do.

But Ellie remembers that day for another reason. It had been the first day she noticed the sick feeling in her stomach. The first time the hue of pink that always clouded her vision around you was dusted green instead, jealousy clawing at her throat.

She hated it. She hated how she couldn’t look away from where you slumped against your father’s chest. How his hand rubbed your shaking back as his breath puffed out in cold little clouds.

She hated how it reminded her of him.

Ellie stood alone, and watched on, feeling the tightening green branches of whatever awfulness was growing in the pit of her stomach. She cursed whatever it was laying above space, she dug the ball of her feet into the freezing grass and she cursed the earth for leaving her here to have to see this.

She walked home alone that night, shrugging you off with a rather monotone, “Go home, don’t worry about me,” when your eyes met hers in the cold air. She saw how you deflated lightly, saw how your eyes dropped to the ground. It made her feel more nauseous. She swallowed her feelings, the good and the bad, and wrapped her arms around herself as she turned.

That night Ellie veered away from her garage, finding comfort instead on the old couch that sat in Joel’s living room, and she thinks it may be the quietest place she has ever heard. She wonders what you may be doing. Was the creaking of the walls all you heard in your Jackson home too? Surely you hadn’t ripped an old and faded jacket from a closet that did not belong to you to use as a makeshift blanket, like Ellie had.

No, Ellie is sure your father walked close to you all the way home, sure he pulled out the chair at the kitchen table for you and offered you dinner, she’s even sure he had managed to crack a smile from you.

Ellie goes to sleep with a sick stomach.

“You're jealous, that’s natural,” Dina told her a few weeks later, after another stint of that awful green vine rooting itself in Ellie, one that kept her from taking you up on an offer to help clean up Shimmer. The growing seed that made her shake her head at you and offer a small and untruthful, “Don’t need any help.”

Dina handed Ellie a cup of warm tea in the cold garage. Ellie wouldn’t drink it, and she also wouldn’t eat any of the meals the Jackson residents left at her doorstep. But everyone still tried.

“But I shouldn’t be,” Ellie’s voice didn’t sound like her own. It was void of any vibrancy, any spark that Ellie’s tongue usually made. It was empty, spoken coldly. cold for herself, cold for that feeling in her chest.

“You’re grieving, El, it’s ok.”

Dina pressed a kind hand to her shoulder, and despite the way Ellie poisoned you in her mind, she still found herself wishing it was yours instead.

And now, more weeks that all pressed confusingly together had passed. The flower’s outside Joel’s were covered by snow, wilted and drained of life. His house had been empty since Ellie stole some of his old clothes a week back, a jacket that embarrassingly laid on the edge of her chair as she swung open the door of her garage turned home, glancing at another container on her doormat.

It was from you, of course it was. Ellie was sure you had been sent from some sort of heaven she was far too damned to ever access. A small note held your handwriting, and Ellie leaned down, grasping the food, the warmth burning at her frozen fingers.

Maria said she didn't see you at supply day again. I think you’d like this. I remember you eating it a lot at the dinners.

ps. you’re doing great in patrols, glad you went back to them. you’re one of the best jackson has.

xx.

A strand of auburn hair fell across her cheek as her chin dipped down, eyelashes tickling her skin as they closed.

Ellie was avoiding you, you had to have known that. Jesse knew it, Dina knew it, hell, even Tommy had commented on it last time he came by. Sure, Ellie was avoiding nearly everyone still, but it was no secret she turned the corner whenever you and your old man were around.

But here you were, making her food, leaving her notes of praise, complimenting her as if you had any need to. It made Ellie’s always down pointed lip quiver for a moment. You still fucking cared. Just like always.

It didn’t feel nice, it didn’t feel like how it would’ve if she got this note months ago. Then she would’ve clapped a hand over her heated cheek, stuffed it under a notebook like a kid with a crush.

But now, it felt more like an ache. A burning in her chest that made her push the door back open and slide the container on the waiting table near her door.

She should eat it later, that would be the kind thing to do. But the little voice whispers in Ellie’s ear again, the voice that drips poison over the thankfulness blossoming in her chest, ‘You think he helped them make that?’ the voice asked.

The palm of her hand pressed to her eyes as she leaned on the doorway, “Fuck.” Ellie muttered.

She kicked the wood, “Fuck!”

Ellie slammed her already bruised fist on the cracked wood and yelped. The splitting pain broke the girl from her mini temper tantrum, and the empty hand cupped the throbbing skin, a pair of teeth sinking into her bottom lip.

Surely this wasn’t a normal way to react to something so kind, something as simple as food. She didn’t have to overthink every small thing, didn’t have to let her brain flip every positive to a negative, but how does Ellie stop what she has grown so accustomed to?

Ellie’s first attempt to rid her chest of the vines that constricted her ribs was a deep breath and a squeeze of her eyes. She pretends she can smell your perfume still lingering in the air, she imagines your cheeks turned up in a smile, she wonders what color of ribbon you found this week to turn into some new hair tool, and then she exhaled.

Maybe if she thought hard enough, the vines would retreat, the ache on her bones would feel more like the silk of your touch. Maybe she can let herself care more about what you give her, kindness, food, those stupid butterflies she used to feel whenever you spoke, that set of pastel oil paints from a year ago. Rather than letting that voice remind her of all the things you could not give her, things you could not repair.

You hadn’t taken Joel from her, your old man hadn’t either. You having that.. having him, it wouldn’t make any of what Ellie was going through change. She swallowed the truth down like nails as she turned away from the garage.

When Ellie opens her eyes again, her vision seems a little more bright.

By the time Ellie winds up at the stable, she is pressed closely by Dina who tends to Japan, brushing quietly

Ellie breaks the silence first, and it surprises both when the first word from her mouth is your name.

Dina’s gaze shoots over, and Ellie can almost see the thin ice she is debating stepping on, lips parting. You were never an easy topic, and usually when El uttered the syllables of your name, Dina was in for a long and drawn out conversation she never knew truly how to maneuver, the conversation layered with every confusing feeling Ellie had for you. The guilt, the jealousy. Everything in between.

Ellie beats her to speaking again, “They left me food again today. I woke up to it.”

Dina nods slowly, eyes falling back to her horse. “That’s nice of them.”

“It is,” Ellie agrees, flexing her bruising knuckles. “Left a note too, complimenting me and shit.”

The brunette to the side of her pauses for a moment, her boots turning in lightly as she judged her next step. “If you had told me this a year ago, I think you would’ve blabbered for like.. forty minutes about how they were ‘the greatest thing ever to exist’ or convinced me it meant they were in love with you.”

The air is silent, and Dina thinks she may have overstepped.

But the vines have taken on a softer sort of squeezing on Ellie’s chest now, one that felt like the ribbon you wore.

“Yea,” she smiled lightly, and Dina stumbled a bit, maybe out of pure shock. “Yea I probably would have.”

The silence finds them again, though there’s no thickness to it, and Ellie finds her heavy shoulders just slightly less pained for a moment.

Until the stable door swings open, and Ellie watches as Dina’s head turns. She can tell from the look on her face alone, on the way she blinks a few times and glances at Ellie.

You had just walked through.

You walk by where Japan and Shimmer stood, and you smiled like you always did.

This time, Ellie’s chest only tightened lightly. She only felt the small tug of ribbon when she recognized the flannel you had pushed up to your elbows, one she had seen your father wear on patrols many times.

This time, Ellie tries to smile back. She doesn’t let that burn find her stomach, doesn’t let the voice sneer at the clothing and remind Ellie of what she did not have. This time, Ellie speaks instead.

“Thanks for the food.”

You look almost as nervous as Ellie feels. You probably didn’t expect responses by this point.

“Oh it’s no problem,” you shake your head and smile. “Hope you enjoy it.”

Ellie nods, tensing up, useless to decide where this conversation should go, where it could go.

Just as the branches begin to curl around her lungs again, Dina cuts them down with her voice.

“El and I thought about sharing it after patrol today, maybe over some shitty movie. You in?”

The auburn haired girl shoots an aimed look at Dina, but the way you light up and step closer, the way she can smell that pastry scent again, it calms her lightly.

“It’ll be fun,” Ellie offered, voice cracking toward the end.

“Yea,” you smile, toes bouncing like they did when you were excited. Toes covered by your favorite shade of blue shoes. “I’d really like that.”

When you meet Ellie’s eyes, she can see pink instead of green again for the first time.

#ellie williams fic #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x f!reader #ellie williams x fem reader #ellie williams fanfic #ellie williams angst #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams

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munsons-hellfire · 3 months

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Happiness in the Heart | Eris Vanserra

SUMMARY: You were in love with Azriel for as long as you could remember. But things changed when Elain joined your family, everything changed. Then you met your mate and suddenly you found everything you ever wanted. But you couldn't have had it had it not been for Azriel.

PAIRINGS: Eris Vanserra x Reader

CONTENT WARNINGS: No smut, Eris is nothing but sweet in this, angst, fluff, mentions of death, mentions of blood, nothing to graphic, mentions of heartbreak.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I had plans to make this a lot more sadder than what is actually written. But I like the way it turned out for the most part. I wanted to write a good sweet side to Eris and this was it. I enjoyed writing this very much and I hope you enjoy it as well.

WORD COUNT: 5.1K

You’d been a part of the inner circle since you could remember. For a long time you truly felt like one of them but everything seemed to change when the Archeron sisters became a part of the inner circle. Suddenly everyone whom you’d assumed was your friend had disappeared. Azriel was your best friend and the two of you were inseparable and then Elain came into the picture and just like that you lost him.

You didn’t blame Elain, you understood. You knew that maybe you were better off alone. Your thoughts got the better of you telling you that maybe things would be better if you disappeared. Especially when Azriel started spending more time with Elain. You loved him, but had always been too afraid to say something. Though now it seemed like you no longer had a chance.

You were drifting from the inner circle, becoming less and less. Though you would still go out on missions, but for the most part you’d ask Rhys to send you out by yourself. As you started to lock yourself inside your room and away from the people you cared about they didn’t seem to notice. That hurt the most, that you had just disappeared from their lives.

Currently you were in the autumn court, Eris had become the new heir of the Court after his father’s untimely demise. Your friends were around but you paid no mind to them, you had drink after drink until you were drunk enough to hopefully not remember anything the following morning. You looked around the court, Azriel was in the center smiling and dancing with Elain.

Right then and there your heart had officially been torn to pieces. And to make the blow worse you believed that everything that had happened between you and Azriel had been your fault. You had waited too long and now you’d never get a chance to tell him how you felt. Taking a long exhale you grabbed another glass of wine and exited out of the room heading outdoors.

You tumbled down the steps slightly eventually sitting down on one of them, then you dropped your body the rest of the way and stared up at the stars with nothing but a blank gaze as tears cascaded down your face and into your hair. You had tried so hard not to cry but seeing Azriel happy with someone who wasn’t you made it that much worse. A figure stood in front of you glancing down at you.

“I would’ve thought that everyone from the Night Court liked to party.” Eris Vanserra’s voice ran through your ears. The newly appointed High Lord was staring down at you.

“I guess I’m not in the mood for a party.” You mumbled, staring past him.

“Pity.” He paused, wanting nothing more than to stop the tears falling from your face. Eris had known since the High Lord meeting to fight against Hybern that you were his mate. When you had walked into the room and looked at him he had felt the golden thread of the bond tie his soul to yours. But it seemed nothing had snapped for you. It had been 5 years since then, 5 years too long in his eyes. “You look rather divine if I say so myself.”

“You’re compliments won’t do anything to cheer me up.”

Eris moved down the steps, then he held his hand out to you. “Walk with me, my darling fox.”

You grabbed his hand but held a glare on your face. “I’m not your darling fox, don’t call me that.”

The male only smiled as the moonlight highlighted his features. “You say that now, sweetheart.”

You released a groan walking past the High Lord. No matter what you heard about Eris, you couldn’t seem to hate him and you didn’t understand why. When the two of you were far enough from the party Eris shrugged off his cold exterior.

“Why don’t you come stay in my court for a while.” Eris said, showing his compassionate side to you. Shock seemed to wash over your face as you stared at him.

“What? Why?” You rushed out.

“Do those you consider friends really care about you?” He asked a serious look in his amber eyes. “Do they know that you're struggling, that you feel so alone, that the male that you love is not interested in you?” The way he had mentioned Azriel was off putting to you. Like he was upset that you were in love with another male that wasn’t him. But why, is what you wanted to know.

“My burdens are not theirs to bear, they are not yours to bear. We barely know each other.”

“I don’t need to know you to feel your pain, little fox.” Eris lifted a hand and moved a strand of your hair behind your pointed ear. The touch was enough to cause your heart to stutter in your chest,

“How can you feel my pain?”

He sighed, looking away. “You’re my mate, Y/N.” The words were soft and so low you almost didn’t hear him speak it.

“What?” He could hear the confusion in your voice as you stared at him.

Eris didn’t want to repeat himself because he needed to get it off his chest, he needed you to know even if you hadn’t felt the bond, even if there might be a chance that you’d reject it. He couldn’t wake up everyday anymore and feel your pain. He wanted to help, he wanted to be there for you to show you that you're not alone no matter what you think.

“You. Are. My. Mate.” He had paused in between the words and had also stepped closer to you. Your breath hitched in your throat when he grasped your fingers and held them between his. And as if he had spoken it into existence you felt the gold thread tie you to Eris. When he gave a tug on the bond a choked sob left your mouth.

You surprised yourself when you wrapped your hands around the male’s waist and pulled him into a hug. More tears had started to roll down your face as he hugged you back just as tightly. When you pulled back slightly to look up at him he lifted his hand to wipe away the tears.

“What does this mean?” You asked.

“You can stay in the Night Court if that’s what you wish, I won’t force this on you. But I’d like a chance for you to get to know me better. To know the real me and not the cold distant male you’ve met a handful of times.”

“Okay.” You paused, staring into his beautiful eyes. “And when I’m ready to accept the bond?”

“When you’re one day ready to accept it we can hold whatever ceremony you’d like. But I’d only request that you come stay with me here in the Autumn Court. Only after will you be my High Lady. You’ll rule with me by my side, I will not force you to bear my heir, all of that will be your decision. All of this will be yours to choose.”

You nodded your head. “I might need a few days to think about the offer.”

“Very well my little fox.” You rolled your eyes at the male.

───── ❝ ◂ ❚ ⊱ꕥ⊰ ❚ ▸ ❞ ─────

You had traveled back to the Night Court, after that night. Upon returning you felt a little less alone. You thought that the idea of Eris being your mate would scare you, but in truth it excited you. Looking at the supposed friendships, you started to think that maybe it was time to leave. You wanted to know Eris more and eventually accept the bond. You just needed time to adjust to the idea of leaving.

In the weeks that you’d returned home no one had made an effort to see where you’d gone that night. Not even Azriel. Suddenly you no longer felt sad about him not loving you. But it still hurt. The way they had all treated you had hurt. Currently you were on a mission by yourself, Rhys had sent you to a village to see if any danger lie there.

In hindsight you should’ve brought someone with you. But that mistake cost you everything. You’d swore to yourself to keep the village safe from whatever danger loomed over it. But when the fairies appeared and took you out, they had killed every villager. Silence surrounded you, you had blacked out and managed to winnow back home.

Eris could feel your panic, sorrow, fear, and sadness down the bond. You landed in the center of your room, blood covered the entirety of your body and you don’t remember what had happened. All you knew is that whoever had killed the villagers were dead. Screams of pain left your mouth, but to you they were muffled. This mission has truly broken you. The door to your bedroom opened, there stood Azriel.

Rhys and Feyre right behind him. While they were trying to get you to calm down and stop the screams that fell off your lips. All the while you started to call for your mate.

“Eris please.” You had whispered in your mind.

“I’m on my way little fox.” He whispered back.

When Azriel got close enough that he could touch you, you flinched, backing away from him. “Don’t touch me.” You had angrily whispered. You could see the hurt on his face but you didn’t have the mental capacity to focus on that, your mind was still on all the children who had died on your hands, all the parents that had been slaughtered, all the elders that were killed. They were all on your hands.

“Y/N, tell me what happened.” Azriel said, hoping he could get something before Rhys or Feyre entered your mind.

“Now you care.” Those were the only words that came from your mouth before Rhys entered your mind. Your shields were down and he had been able to discover everything. You tried to push the High Lord out of your mind but it had been too much. So much so that when he left your mind you collapsed to the ground. You feel asleep the nightmares of what you witnessed following you.

Rhys had shown both Feyre and Azriel what had happened on the mission. He however refused to show Azriel that Eris had been your mate. He would respect your privacy on that. As for everything else, he should’ve seen the signs that you were pulling away, and after this mission he knew you’d leave and never return. They had all pushed you and now they had lost you.

Cassian appeared, Eris standing with him, a scared look on his face as he looked down at you unconscious. Azriel clenched his jaw, staring at the male.

“What’s he doing here?” Azriel went on to ask.

“I’m here to take my mate home.” Eris answered as he walked towards your body that was still covered in blood.

“You’re her mate?” The words left Azriel’s mouth before he could stop them.

Eris only ignored him, he picked your body up and held you in his arms. Then he turned back to Rhys, a glare on his face. The stone cold looked never leaving even as Rhys spoke to him.

“You can do the one thing that we all failed at. You can take care of Y/N and be there. Just promise that she comes to visit.” Rhys said, his voice broken as he said it.

“I will try my best. But you all betrayed her. You know she shouldn’t have gone on a mission in this state and yet you sent her anyway, now look where it’s gotten her.” Eris turned to look at Azriel. “And you, I didn’t want to tell her that I was her mate because I thought she deserved better than me. I thought maybe Y/N would be good with you, she loved you. But you broke her heart and now you’ve lost her for good. I will make this very clear shadowsinger. You are only allowed in my Court if your High Lord or High Lady is present, if not you are banned from entering the Autumn court even if you try to talk to Y/N. If you step foot on my court without either Rhys or Feyre present you will be killed.”

Eris looked at Rhys and Feyre who gave him a nod of understanding. Before Azriel could argue Eris winnowed out heading back to the Autumn Court to clean you up. Azriel looked at his High Lord and Lady.

“You’re going to honor what that male said?” Azriel asked, staring at the two.

“It’s not like we have a choice in the matter. I told you that she loved you, we all did and you ignored her when she was hurting. We all did, and none of us will ever be able to make up for that. But you should’ve told her that you didn’t like her that way. Instead you dragged her on like she was a lost puppy.” Rhys paused, taking control of the power inside himself. “I sensed that Eris was her mate and that’s why she came to the coronation for Eris. I shouldn’t have sent her on that mission but she needed to be with Eris and this was the only way, the only way for her to be truly happy. Because if she had done something I would’ve never forgiven myself and Eris would’ve never forgiven us. We would lose an ally for any future war. So yes, Feyre and I will be honoring what he has asked. You will not step foot on Autumn land unless one or both of us is with you. If you go against our orders your fate will be left in Eris’ hands.”

“Fine.” Azriel stormed out leaving to figure out what had just happened.

───── ❝ ◂ ❚ ⊱ꕥ⊰ ❚ ▸ ❞ ─────

You woke up a few days later. When you came to you looked around the room until your eyes fell on your mate. He was sitting in a chair, asleep. You groaned slightly as you lifted yourself up from the bed. Eris opened his eyes and found you staring at him.

“Hello, little fox.” He whispered, a smirk gracing his lips.

“How long have I been out?” You asked quickly, smiling internally at the nickname. You still weren’t ready to accept it but it was starting to win you over, especially after he had rescued you.

“A week. I had a healer take a look at the injuries you got on that mission. They were healed.” He answered. You eyed him as he stood from the chair and walked over to the bed, he sat down on the edge and reached for one of your hands.

“I’m sorry.” You looked away from him as the words left your lips.

“No. What happened is not your fault. Don’t apologize, I will always come to rescue you no matter what.” For the first time in 5 years you finally understood what it was like to have someone in your corner.

“What, um, what happened after I passed out?”

“Rhysand wants you to still visit. I told him I’d try my best but I know right now that’s not the best for you. I banned Azriel from my court, our court when you’re ready to run it by my side. He’s only allowed to step foot in this land if Rhysand or Feyre is with him. I will not let him hurt you again, ever.”

Your lips trembled, how could someone you’ve barely known done so much for you. Eris had done just that, had done enough to make sure you're safe and secure in your new home. You wished he’d show this side more to the other high lords, either way you were so lucky to call him your mate. Even if you hadn’t accepted it yet.

“Thank you.” Eris nodded his head, eventually he rested his forehead against yours and the two of you closed your eyes and enjoyed each other’s company.

───── ❝ ◂ ❚ ⊱ꕥ⊰ ❚ ▸ ❞ ─────

It had been a year since you’d left the Night Court and joined the Autumn Court. You became a part of the Autumn Court a month after your arrival, it had been tough to get used to but you eventually found peace. You had picked up a part time job as a librarian to keep you busy when Eris was away for his High Lord responsibilities.

After some time you and Eris had alone time. You had cooked a meal for him and that had been your way of accepting the mating bond. Two weeks later you had a mating ceremony for the Court. You married Eris and became High Lady of the Autumn Court. Word had been spread to the other courts, and you had received plenty of congratulations.

Even ones from those you used to consider friends. For the entire year you had managed to heal yourself with the help of your mate, your husband. And you were ready to forgive all of them including Azriel. Especially now that you would be a mother. Currently you sat in the bathing waters with a hand on your bump, you were 8 months along.

You couldn’t be more excited to get closer to the due date, to be able to welcome your child into the world. Eris was afraid when you had first told him. He was afraid he’d be like his father and torment the babe rather than love it. But you had constantly reminded him that this child would come into the world loved by two parents. You had made it clear to Eris that he was nothing like his father and he had shown that by changing his persona and being there throughout the pregnancy so far.

“How are my girls?” Eris questioned from the bathroom door. You pulled your attention from your bump and looked at the male you were happy to call your husband and mate.

“We’re fine. Very happy.” You paused, sending him a smile and a large amount of happiness down the bond, he of course smiled at you. Then he walked towards you holding his hand to you. You took it and he helped you from the tub. “Must I remind you that we are going to have a son.” Your smile only brightened. You were certain you’d have a son first, where Eris was certain you’d have a daughter first.

“We shall know when our child comes into this world.”

“And it’ll be the happiest day to be able to hold him or her in our arms.” Eris rested his head on yours. The two of you take in each other's emotions. Finally you parted and helped you get changed into a dress that had been altered to fit your growing bump. You two stood in front of the mirror, Eris had his hands resting on your stomach, yours were on top of his.

“Are you ready for tonight?” He asked, concerning washing from his lips.

“I am. This is a great way to announce the pregnancy of our first heir. And it’ll be good for me to forgive them. It’s the last step in my recovery and I need to do this.” You explained to him.

“Okay. If at any point you get overwhelmed-”

“I know, tell you and we can leave.” You said cutting him off.

“Exactly.” He watched as you turned around in his arms and stared up at him.

“Azriel is no longer banned from our Court.” Your words caught him off guard but he knew to expect them.

“Are you positive?”

“Yes, if he wishes to visit without Feyre and Rhys then he should be able to. I don’t love him anymore and I’m no longer bothered by the way he treated me and the fact that he didn’t love me. Without him I wouldn’t have found you, I wouldn’t be growing our child. I wouldn’t have the family I was always supposed to have. It’s because of him that I get to love you and will continue to love until the Mother decides it’s my time to leave. Azriel is the reason behind all of this and it’s not fair to keep him from our Court.”

Eris smiled at your words. “Very well. My High Lady has a say in his punishment and if that’s what you are okay with then I will stand by your side as you tell them.” You gave a small shake of your head. “Now we have guests waiting for us, I don’t think we should keep them waiting.”

“No we shouldn’t.”

You interlaced your fingers with your husband’s and the two of you walked out of your chambers heading to the throne room where the other High Lords and High Ladies waited. You’d even known Tamlin would be there. He was still making amends for what he did in the past but a few months ago you’d learned that the Spring Lord had discovered his mate.

She had been helping Tamlin with his recovery and helping him to be a better male. Lucien had been able to build his friendship with the male again, and you were there to help. You were also there when Lucien found out that Helion was his father. Everyone was healing and you couldn’t be more proud of the things all of you had accomplished since Eris had taken over as the High Lord in Autumn.

With you by his side things were moving in the direction they needed. The doors opened for the two of you, instantly eyes fell onto you and Eris. Your grip on your mate's hand got tighter as the two of you walked past your guest heading towards your throne. He squeezed back, assuring you that everything was okay.

Keeping your head held high, you had a hand resting on your bump protectively as the other High Lords and Ladies and the guest they might’ve brought with them stared at your bump. After making it to the steps you and Eris turned looking at everyone.

“My wife and I wanted to thank you all for being here. Please enjoy the food, drinks, and have fun dancing.” Eris said, a smile on his face. Everyone was still getting used to this new side of Eris but they trusted you, and because they trusted you they could trust him.

Eris helped you sit down on the throne, then he took a seat on the armrest next to you. Rhysand and Feyre walked up with Azriel behind them but at a distance.

“Y/N. It’s so good to see you again.” Feyre stated with a smile on her lips. You smiled back.

“You’re glowing.” Rhysand added.

“Thank you. Eris and I are so excited to meet our little bundle in the coming weeks.” You said, briefly glancing at Azriel. He was staring at you.

“How have you been?” Feyre proceeded to ask.

“I’m doing better.” You looked to Eris, he gave you a nod and squeezed your shoulder softly. You reached for his hand and held it in your hands. Azriel took note of the wedding bands that were on your left hand. He noticed Eris had one too. “I actually wanted to discuss the banning of your Shadowsinger from our court.”

“We apologize if this has caused any discomfort for you.” Rhysand said, his violet eyes switching between you and Eris.

“No it hasn’t. Firstly I’m sorry that it’s taking me so long to speak with all of you. I was in pain and was trying to heal. Eris, he’s helped a lot in my healing journey. And so has our child. I’d like to have family dinners with you again, as long as Eris is welcome.”

Feyre and Rhysand glanced at each other, you know they were having a silent conversation with each other. Finally they looked back at you and Eris.

“We’d like that very much.” Feyre said with a soft smile on her face. You released a breath, Eris sent a wave of love down the bond. You knew he was proud of you and it was showing.

“Secondly, Azriel, could you please step forward so that I may speak with you.”

He gave a nod and moved in between Feyre and Rhysand until he was in front of them. His shadows were moving around his body, he seemed happier as you looked at him. Maybe some kind of change had come his way after you’d left. You knew he wasn’t with Elain because she was with Lucien right now.

A few months ago she had accepted the bond between them after she herself had found what made her happy. She learned to accept the bond and with it Lucien. You’d hoped that maybe Azriel had found his mate too.

“I know that you were never in love with me the way I was. I only wished you’d told me how you felt. That being said, thank you.”

“Thank you?” Azriel asked, hazel eyes narrowing in you as confusion filled his normally emotionless face. Feyre and Rhysand also stared at you with confused looks.

“If you had told me that you loved me I would’ve never found my mate. I wouldn’t be married to Eris, I wouldn’t be High Lady of Autumn, it’s still a shock even now. And I wouldn’t be carrying our child right now. Because of you I found everything I needed. I found my home, my purpose. I learned to heal myself even after everything I’ve gone through. I hope that you find a mate one day.”

Azriel took a moment to process your words. “I have, she’s wonderful.” He said. He turned slightly looking at Rhys. Then he looked back at you and Eris. “She’s here, would you like to meet her?”

You nodded enthusiastically, years ago you would’ve been sad and jealous that he hadn’t noticed you but now it was different. Now you were happy and you could see that he had to.

“Will you help me up, dear?” You asked, looking at Eris. He smiled at you.

“Of course, little fox.” You smiled at the nickname as he helped you from the seat.

The two of you walked down the steps. When you were close enough you pulled Feyre into a hug. She hugged you back tightly. Then you moved over to Rhysand and hugged him tightly. Seconds later Azriel came back with a female by his side. Cassian, Nesta, Amren and Mor were also with him.

“They wanted to see you too.” Azriel mentioned. Hugs went around quickly, then your eyes landed on the female Azriel had brought over. You took a closer look at her and noticed the bright blue eyes. “This is Gwyneth, my mate.” The smile that broached his face made you happy. Lucien and Elain joined at some point, he sent a nod towards you and Eris.

“It’s so nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard so much about you from everyone.” She said, holding her hand out towards you.

“It’s nice to meet you too.” You told her your name as you shook her hand. “Eris is my mate, and this is our little bean.” You said holding onto your bump. Eris was behind you with a smile on his face.

“A happy reunion. Does this mean you’ll come visit now?” Mor asked eyes on you.

“Yes it does. And you are more than welcome to visit here as much as you like.” You paused looking at Azriel as sadness seemed to cross his face for a brief moment. “None of that.” You said.

“What?” Azriel asked you.

“Azriel, Shadowsinger, you are hereby welcomed back to the Autumn court whenever you please. You’re no longer banned from our home.”

“And you’re okay with this?” Azriel asked, looking at the High Lord.

“My High Lady’s word is power and if she grants it then we are to follow it.” Eris answered.

“Very well.”

Relief washed over you when Azriel accepted your request. “Let’s enjoy this party, shall we?” You said pulling your husband towards the dance floor. The others followed behind you. As you danced with your family you looked up at Eris.

“Are you happy?” He asked spinning you around and pulling you back to his chest.

“So happy.” You answered, resting your head on his chest.

“Good. You deserve it.”

───── ❝ ◂ ❚ ⊱ꕥ⊰ ❚ ▸ ❞ ─────

A few weeks later you and Eris welcomed your son into the world. Currently you held onto the sleeping babe as your friends started to arrive at your home to meet the newborn. You looked down at your son, truly content with the life you had right now. You could hear the laughter in your home and it had been so long since you felt a part of it.

Azriel made his way up to you first, Eris allowing you time to talk to him. You looked at the Shadowsinger when he came to a stop next to you. A smile graced your lips when he looked down at your son.

“Would you like to hold him, Az?” You asked, using a nickname you hadn’t used in a long time.

“I’d be honored, Y/N.” He smiled brightly. You leaned forward shifting the babe into Azriel’s arms. His scarred hands tightened, as he held onto the babe. His shadows moved towards the babe, almost as if they were protecting your son.

“I think you’d make a fine Uncle.” You said, lifting your gaze to Azriel. He was staring at you with shock in his hazel eyes. “I don’t want what happened in the past to define our future. Nova, he deserves to have a happy family. And I want you to be a part of that just as much as everyone else that’s here.”

“As long as I can teach him how to fight.” Azriel said excitedly.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less, but Nova has a few years before he’s ready for that.”

“Very well.” As the night moved on and everyone met Nova you realized that it had been so long since you felt this content, this happy. You had your new family and your old family.

“You deserve to be happy, don’t forget that my love.” Eris said in your mind as a wave of love flew down the bond.

“How can I forget when you're constantly reminding me?” You remarked with a smile.

“And I’ll continue to remind you until the Mother decides to take me away from you. But I promise that I’ll find you in every lifetime.”

“I’ll hold you to that.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

#eris vanserra #eris acotar #eris x reader #reader insert #x reader #eris vanserra x reader #azriel #rhysand #elain archeron #nesta archeron #feyre archeron #cassian #morrigan #amren #gwyneth berdara #gwyn x azriel #lucien vanserra

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redflagshipwriter · 3 months

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Hot Ghouls in Your Area

Chapter 2

It was a very weird ride. Danny felt like he was an authority on uncomfortable and strange conversations, given his bizarre family and all the experiences he'd had: but it was exquisitely uncomfortable sitting next to his bride sacrifice and making conversation.

The guy didn't offer his name. He was- honestly, he was built. Danny tried not to get caught visually measuring how absurdly broad the guy's shoulders were. He was weirdly offended that the cultists had sent him someone who was more ripped than he was.

"What's that?" The guy prompted. Jason. This guy's name was Jason. It was a little hard to keep in mind given he didn't really look like a Jason. He looked like… The Red Biker 👻😱🩸 or some shit.

Danny mentally rewound his own babbling and brightened when he realized that there was at least some interest in NASA's newest telescope. He infodumped on rote. It genuinely was an interesting topic! But he'd told 3 people about it already so it didn't take all of his attention.

At one point, Jason pinched his middle finger and used the grip to pull off his glove. Danny swallowed. He tried not to stare at the first glimpse of skin. It was not super light or super dark– a little tanner than Danny, maybe. Not that that said much when he was living like a cave creature in a dorm room, trying to get the grades to be an astronaut.

'He's human,' Danny thought. Of course he was, he'd been sent from earth, but-

He just felt like a ghost.

The confusion put his hackles up. It was weird to perceive this guy as a possible threat. But he wasn't! He was just some hot dummy who got caught by friggin Jeremy Waters. Jeremy. Come on. It didn't get much sadder than that.

But overall? He could see why the Infinite Realms had gotten mixed up enough to accept this guy. Red was definitely weird enough to be a ghost, dressed up for the combination war front/biker bar/club. He hadn't made a move to take off his ugly motorcycle helmet the whole time they'd been talking. It was kind of creepy, to be honest.

The most disturbing part was that he smelled, like, really good. He smelled like sexy death and Danny kinda wanted to roll around in it like the world's most educated cat.

It was with some relief that Danny bounded away from his semi husband, up the stairs to Clockwork. "You know who it is and why I'm here!" He hollered, hands making a megaphone shape around his mouth. "Help me! I'm too young to be a child bride."

"Technically," Clockwork said, floating pleasantly into view, "you are too old to be a child bride. As you are not a child, Danny."

He waved that off. "I'm a kid on the inside," he dismissed. "And 19 is basically a high schooler."

"As you say." Clockwork drifted away. Danny followed. "How is your university coursework?"

"It's fine." Danny shrugged. "The Gen Eds are giving me war flashbacks to Mr. Lancer, though."

"You liked him," Clockwork said.

Danny bristled. "I did not!"

He kinda had. Mr. Lancer could have been a lot worse.

That was beside the point. Danny caught up to his ghost mentor. "I can't be distracted from this," he said, aiming for stern. "There's some human out there who wants to go home. I also want him to go home. How do we make that happen ?"

"Why Danny, have you forgotten about portals?"

Danny scowled. "You know what I mean," he groused. "I want to send him home single. Unattached. Not married to me at all."

Clockwork finally stopped moving and looked directly at him. His large eyes held only a kind of curiosity. "I suppose that you could banish him. That would have the effect of ending your relationship."

Danny hesitated. He'd learned that accepting suggestions on their face could go very badly. "That seems kinda harsh," he said. "Would there be any repercussions of that?"

Clockwork hummed from the back of his throat. "Yes, it would prevent young Jason from becoming a ghost when he passes again. Excuse me, I want that shelf behind you."

Danny moved out of the way on reflex before he processed those words. "That sounds bad."

The older ghost seemed to shrug. "The Ghost king can banish ghosts, and your paramour is ghostly enough to qualify. It would solve your current dilemma."

He deliberately chose not to respond to the word 'paramour.'

"I'm actually looking for a solution that doesn't interfere with the state of his soul and afterlife," Danny said dryly. Then he blinked. "You're really gonna call him Jason?"

Clockwork reached up and withdrew a metal object from the shelf. It clicked in his hand. "Indeed."

Danny waited for another divorce suggestion. When Clockwork didn't give one, he groaned. "How do I find another solution?" He asked, tired. This was another test, wasn't it? It was a chance for him to problem solve on his own.

That netted him a beaming smile. "You should take him to the royal library."

"And look for information about ghost divorces?" Danny asked. Clockwork gave him an enigmatic smile.

He chose to believe that was a yes. Danny patted his mentor's shoulder. "Thanks!" He shouted, already turning on his heel. "I'll do that. Have a good day!"

"Goodbye, Danny."

Jason hadn't moved at all, sitting weirdly tense and tall in the passenger seat. Danny gave him a nervous smile as he jumped in.

"Did you find out anything?" Jason asked. His voice was even enough to obscure whatever it was he thought, and the helmet made the words come out kinda flat and mechanical.

Danny winced. "Yes and no," he said, trying to find cheerful. "The first solution seems kinda bad, to be honest, so let's go to the library and look for another one!"

"...Ghosts have public libraries?" Jason said.

"No," Danny said. And then he frowned. "Maybe? I don't know. I haven't seen one but I haven't been here long. We're going to Pariah's creepy old castle to look at his library." He started up the Specter Speeder and took off. "It's big. And he was a real creep, so he probably had, uh." He cleared his throat. "Paramours." His face was getting hot and red. Maybe it wasn't obvious. He tried to look unaffected. "Probably why that ritual was out there," he babbled. Wow, the minutes separating their destinations felt very long when he was digging a verbal hole. "He probably had a lot of sacrifices he accepted, maybe that's where the skeleton army came from actually."

"Skeleton army?" Jason managed to sound incredulous through the world's ugliest motorcycle helmet. "How do ghosts and skeletons both exist in proximity?" He cleared his throat. "I mean, if you don't need the physical body to exist, why would anyone retain their corpse?"

Danny laughed nervously. "Yeah, that's weird," he agreed.

'Don't ask me afterlife questions,' he mentally begged. 'I just work here. I don't know the answers.'

"Metaphysically-"

"Do you like sports?" Danny interrupted in a high voice.

Jason paused. "No. Do you?"

"...Not really," Danny admitted, thinking of getting ganged up on in dodgeball and knocked down in basketball.

They existed in what felt like a confused silence for a few minutes. Danny parked the Speeder outside of the castle and I clicked his seatbelt with a rush of relief. "We're here," he said. He threw open the top.

Jason didn't move from where he was flat against the backrest, only lifting his head. "... Should I come too?"

Danny blinked down at him and waved a hand in invitation. "Yeah, let's go. This is kinda my place now so I can invite you in."

Jason moved forward abruptly, like he'd just gotten unstuck from the seat. Something about it looked wrong to his hindbrain. But Danny dismissed it and started off at a jog. It wasn't his business if Jason was a weird little guy. (Weird big guy? It didn't sound the same, but Jason wasn't petite.)

Jason paused on the battlements. Danny looked back and tried to see it from his perspective. The architecture was jagged, pitch black, and without any of the friendly colorful touches a castle should have. "It's kind of creepy," he said apologetically. "Pariah has just the worst vibe. Rancid energy."

"...Is it smart to say that?" Jason wondered. He started walking again.

Danny shrugged. "What's he gonna do to me?" He asked rhetorically. "Get his butt kicked again?"

#red hot ghouls #dcdp #deadonmain #dp x dc

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keerysfreckles · 3 months

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Hey! Dan I request a Luke castellan x reader where reader is the daughter of hades and Luke has a crush on her? Though, reader has major trust issues, and often feels like she doesn’t belong on camp because people are either scared of her, or don’t like her (and soemthing shows that to her) because of how her father is viewed (negatively), so she’s pretty much alone. Especially since she has no siblings at camp, so it’s just lonely and cold in her cabin.

burn — luke castellan

pairing: luke castellan x hades fem!reader

warnings: use of y/n and she/her pronouns, angst at the end

a/n: rereading tlt and im giggling so hard BABY PERCABETH UGH

masterlist !

꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱

y/n l/n always felt like she didn't belong at camp half-blood. ever since she stepped foot into the idiotic summer camp, all eyes were on her. the campers, and even herself, could feel a negative aura around her. no one knew why.

until she got claimed by her father, hades.

y/n felt like a bigger outcast than before when a large black glowing scepter appeared above her head after fighting off a hellhound that got into the camp. as soon as she looked up and saw the message from her father, campers around her instantly backed up. the older ones had looks of disgust on their faces, while the younger ones seemed more scared of the girl.

the only camper who didn't view y/n differently was luke castellan. he believed the half-bloods were nothing like their godly parent, so why would his mind change for y/n?

cabin thirteen was off to the side of the rest. it made y/n feel like even more of an outcast, again. the walls, columns and roof were all black wood. they were fading and each corner had cobwebs. maybe y/n would finally feel at home once she stepped inside.

she was wrong.

the inside looked even sadder than the outside. there were six bunk beds, three on each side. y/n didn't know why. she knew she wouldn't be getting any siblings any time soon. the lighting in the cabin was grey, the dusted windows were barely letting in sunlight.

that night at dinner, y/n felt even worse. she sat at table thirteen, getting even more stares than normal. the only person who looked at her like a real human, was luke. his eyes were soft, while the other camper's eyes were still filled with fear.

luke stands from his table. all eyes drift towards him as he walks towards y/n's empty table. even her eyes follow him with worry.

"you know if you sit here it's practically suicide," y/n watches as luke sits across from her.

luke shrugs, "i know you're not as bad as everyone thinks you are."

luke saw the faintest smile appear over y/n's features.

"you know everyone's going to start some dumb rumor about you now, right? all because you're sitting by me," y/n messes with her half eaten mac and cheese on her plate.

"so i'll let them talk. they don't know the truth about you. they can start whatever rumors they want, but i'll know the real you," luke smiles.

"you're brave castellan, for thinking there might be a friendship here," y/n chuckles, gesturing between the two.

a small horn echoes through the outdoor mess hall. all the campers walk by the fire with their plates with their offering to the gods. no one dared to stand next to y/n at the fire, besides luke. the two kept brushing shoulders and if you squinted you'd see a blush forming on both camper's cheeks.

for once, y/n felt normal. she only felt normal when she was around luke. he stayed by her during archery lessons, and talked to her while they waites for their turn on the climbing wall.

the feeling didn't last long. y/n was walking back from the girl's shower room. it was late and she figured no one would be out of their cabins. she had her pajamas on, and her clothes from today and towel were in her hands. she was so close to getting back to her cabin, when her things fell out of her hands, right into the mud.

just as y/n thought her night couldn't get any worse, she heard clarisse and her goons laughing behind her. she turned and her suspicions were correct. clarisse was holding a bow and arrow. that had to be what knocked y/n's belongings onto the floor.

"clarisse can you please just leave me alone? i've had a long week," y/n pleads.

before clarisse can get a word out, luke's voice makes the camper's head turn.

"she asked you to leave, so leave before this gets ugly."

"oh no," clarisse taunts, "the daughter of hades can't even fight her own battles. pathetic."

"leave," luke's voice is stern as he's now standing in front of y/n.

clarisse finally does as she's told, with the ares' sisters following behind her.

luke guides y/n back to her cabin in silence. his hand never leaves her lower back, and y/n could've sworn she felt jolts of electricity flood her veins at his touch.

"are you okay?" luke asks y/n. she sits on her bed, rubbing her face.

"i don't know," y/n's honest.

"is there anything i can do to help?"

"i don't know luke!" y/n exclaims, "i don't know how you could possibly help me!" y/n stands and walks closer to luke, her voice raising with every word. "i've felt like a loner ever since i got here, and having hades and my freaking father doesn't help. i'm stuck in this stupid cabin, all alone with no one to talk to. no other campers besides you talk to me. chiron and mr. d both look at me like i had something to do with being hades' daughter."

y/n takes in a deep breath, "i'm just so sick of this."

she hides her face in her hands as she begins to cry. with no words luke steps forward and brings the poor girl into his arms. he rubs his hands up and down her back while resting his chin on the top of her head. she can't remember the last time she was held.

"i know it sucks for now, but i promise y/n, things will get better," luke's voice is calm compared to the girl's outburst she had moments ago.

"i promise," he whispers once more.

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nathaslosthershit · 21 days

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Birthday Celebrations (Teen Dad!OP81)

(Part 5 of my Teen Dad AU [can be read in any order])

Summary: The Piastri twins, with the help of their mom, try to make their Dad’s 23rd birthday as special as it can be. Warnings: I am currently pregaming a pregame so I am not writing this while sober. Also I decided to make this super fluffy because it only makes Tensions Rise so much sadder. A/N: Name reveal for the twins! Also this takes place before Tensions Rise, which originally took place at the Silverstone GP but I have changed it to Suzuka :)

6 am on April 6th, Honey woke up to her alarm. It was earlier than she would usually wake up. On most days, her 3 year olds woke her up at around 7:30, but today she decided to make sure she was waking up ahead of them, in order to intercept any attempts to wake up Oscar on his 23rd birthday.

She had finished decorating the kitchen when she heard tiny footsteps approaching. Two bleary-eyed toddlers entered the kitchen and looked around, eyes opening wide with a sort of wonder only young children seem to have, as they saw all the balloons and streamers around the room.

“Hi babies, are you excited for today?” Honey asked as she hugged each of her kids. Seeing the confusion appear on their faces, she added, “It's your dad’s birthday! And I think it's about time to wake him up. Are you both ready?”

She was met with enthusiastic nods and once promising that they would get the cake they so desired, she held both their hands as she quietly opened her bedroom door, letting the twins loose to wake their dad up.

Oscar had been blissfully asleep when he felt weight on him, suddenly throwing him out of sleep. Immediately concerned, he sat up with an impressive amount of swiftness before he realized it was his children sitting on top of him.

“Happy birthday Daddy!” They both screamed at the same time, immediately shoving the cards they had made him a few days prior in his face. They couldn’t write properly yet, so Honey transcribed what the scribbles meant in her much nicer handwriting below.

“Aw, thank you both. What a frightening but sweet way to wake up.” He said as he gave them both a kiss on the head. He then turned to Honey, who had let the toddlers get their moment with him. Kissing him passionately, the adults only stopped once they heard the ‘ew’s from their two kids.

“Happy birthday, darling.” She said as she handed him a jewelry box.

“I thought we said no gifts for holidays? That the money should go towards the kids?” Oscar asked as he held the box.

“That was when we were teens and you weren’t making F1 money.” She sassily replied.

Opening the box, he was confused when he saw two gold bands inside, a perfect fit for his and Honey’s ring fingers.

“Look at the engravings.” She quickly added. There, the names Frances and Hudson were engraved, the names belonging to the two kids sitting next to them on the bed. “I thought I would buy the bands ahead of time. I know we aren’t getting married for a bit but I really wanted to add their names to the inside and knew you aren’t big on getting gifts. Think of it as our first step towards our wedding” She rambled. She got nervous the longer he stared at the gift, was it too soon? Did he hate it?

“Honey, this is the sweetest thing ever.” He said as he began to tear up. They hadn’t started wedding planning, with how busy things had been, it seemed impossible to find the time. This was the first real step towards their forever. As he looked at them, it finally settled in how much he needed to marry her as soon as he could.

“God I can’t wait to marry you.” He whispered, more to himself than to her.

“I can’t wait to marry you too, Oscar. Now, let's go feed these hungry kids. I made special birthday pancakes.”

#formula 1 imagine #formula 1 x reader #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri x you #oscar piastri imagine

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piichuu · 7 months

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♡ AN UNWANTED LETTER - GOJO SATORU

WARNINGS: MAJOR SPOILERS if you haven’t seen the new jjk leaks, so read on your own risk. angst, f!reader

WORD COUNT: 1.2k

yuta is quiet as he reaches a letter over to you. he’s standing in the doorway with a somber look on his face. “you should go sit down somewhere, i’ll stay here in the hallway,” he mumbles and without a word, you make your way towards the bedroom where you sit down, opening up the letter you’ve been given.

“to my dear y/n.

if you receive this letter, i will be dead. that’s a horrible sentence to start with, but it’s the truth. it’s not that i don’t believe in my own capabilities, but i can’t leave you with nothing if i die, that would make you even sadder.

i’m giving this to yuta, he’ll look after you now for a few weeks, i’ve made him promise because i know you’re gonna be crying, probably become depressed. if you do get depressed, i’m gonna be there and hold you close, even if you can’t feel it. my pretty girl, i know i always tell you that you’re pretty when you cry, but i hate when you do so. i prefer your smile, to know you’re happy. your laugh is a little funny, but i prefer it that way, because no one laughs like you and i love that you’re your own person, not faking anything for me.

i’m a little (very) sad that i won’t get to have a family with you or put a ring on your finger. will it hurt you more if i told you that i was going to propose when i got back? probably, but now you know. i wish we could have our own little children who would run around the house and annoy you. they would love me of course, they would get to do everything they wanted to. they would get to eat so much candy and play video games with me. maybe they could help you cook every once in a while since you always insist to cook when i tell you than i can do that to! you would be a great mom, the greatest of them all actually. all those years you helped me take care of megumi showed that. he loves you a lot even if he’s never told you, but i can see that he sees you as his mom, hopefully he sees me as a dad as well.

he’s always clung to you more than me. i remember when i found you two asleep on the couch after you had read him a bed time story. you looked so cute and he was holding onto your hand so tightly like he really trusted you. it hurts me to say, but you’ve probably always been his favorite. even now that he’s older he likes you more than me :( but that makes me a little happy as well, because he’s always so stone faced around everyone else but you. you make him smile and that makes me happy :)

apparently people who’ve had a partner who has died always say that they would want them to find someone else, but even if i want you to be happy, that thought makes me a little sad. but if you do ever find someone else who you love as much as you love me (which is impossible), i hope he treats you like the princess you are or else i’ll have to haunt him. i’m not joking. and if you do have kids, please tell them about me? i’m sure they will think i was super cool. my death is probably gonna be called the coolest deaths of them all, i hope!

i’m sorry if i’m joking too much, at this point i’m sure you’re bawling. but just know that i’m right behind you with my arms around you, okay? maybe you can’t feel it but i’m giving you a kiss on the cheek right at this moment.

don’t be too sad, okay? but also take the time you need to heal, i don’t want you to rush anything. it’s okay to be sad, so cry how much you want, but not for the rest of your life please because that would make me sad :( you should try to smile at least once a day so i can look at you and know that there might be at least some things that are making your days good.

you’re gonna meet me again, don’t worry. but please don’t put yourself in danger just so you can see me again. i want you to live until you’re old and then we’ll meet each other when you reach heaven with me, because that’s where i’m going! i’m gonna watch over you and wait, i have all the time in the world now so grow old and do everything you’ve ever dreamt of.

just know that i didn’t die without putting on a fight. it must be going on for a while before i die, but i’m gonna try to do my best not to die because i want to see you so bad and just hug you and kiss you and tell you how beautiful you are. but you will always be the prettiest human ever, no matter how many wrinkles you have or if your back gets all hunched in the future.

i have a whole bottle of perfume in our bedroom that i bought a while ago, but i haven’t really used it a lot since i’ve been gone for a while now, so you can use that and spray it all over the house if you miss me too much. good thing i bought that stuffy for you before i went to shibuya!

i need to end this letter now. i’m sorry for not being able to see now for a while, but we will meet in a couple of years. i’m always gonna look after you now that i’m gone, so there will never be anything to worry about. i hope you will be okay and that you aren’t crying too much now :( but i know that you’re still just as pretty as always. i can’t believe that i got the best girlfriend in the entire world to spend my life with, even if i would’ve wished my life would be longer. you’ve made me so happy over the years and i really hope i’ve made you happy too, even if you’re probably sad because of me now.

yuta and the others will look after you, i promise. maybe you’ll be annoyed with them, but that’s because i sent them and i’m made to be a little annoying, so you won’t get rid of the annoyance too easily! i’m gonna watch over you for a good while now, i’m always listening to every word you say, even if i’m not somewhere you can see me. if you ever have a bad day, tell the sky and i will hear every single word. cry your eyes out and i will wipe your tears away.

my love, my one and only. i love you more than you can ever imagine. you’re my sun, you’re what’s been keeping me alive for the past few years and don’t ever blame yourself for anything that’s happened to me. you are the greatest thing in my life and have been healing my soul. i will forever love you. from your idiot boyfriend <3”

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dandylovesturtles · 3 months

Text

I should be in bed lol but I wanted to write a turtle tot sick fic so here

I went into this with no plan and it ended up uh. way sadder than I intended. whoops.

cw: mentions of vomit

...

Blue slept through naptime. That should have been Splinter's first clue.

In the moment, he'd just been so happy to actually have four sleeping children that he'd taken the opportunity for his own nap, the old, tattered storybook he'd been reading them draped over his face. He never managed to get Blue to wind down enough to sleep, so he usually had to quietly entertain him with books or the tv on low until the others woke up. But his Baby Blue had conked out almost immediately today, and soon Splinter was snoozing right along with them.

Blue was also the last to wake up. That should have been the second clue.

Splinter was woken up by Orange, talking in loud, disjointed sentences with plenty of nonsense words as he played with an old plastic telephone Splinter had found them. Red was racing his toy cars, making his own sound effects as they skid across the floor and crashed into the wall. Only Purple was quiet, industriously sorting his legos by color and size.

Splinter sat up, letting the book slide off his face, and took stock. It was surprising to see Blue still curled up against his leg even in the midst of all the racket his brothers were making. "Blue?" he said softly, giving the little turtle a nudge. Blue blinked his eyes open, groggily looking around. "Naptime is over."

Blue pushed himself up into a sitting position, then rubbed clumsily at his eyes. He looked so tired still that Splinter debated telling him he could keep sleeping, even if it might make putting him to bed later more difficult.

But once Blue was up, he saw Red racing his cars and pushed quickly to his feet, hurrying over to join in the game. Almost immediately he was demanding Red hand over one of the cars and setting up an elaborate make-believe track for their race, so Splinter let it go.

Thirty minutes later, Blue tugged on Splinter's old sweatpants and said, "Daddy, my tummy hurts." In hindsight, this is exactly when Splinter should have put it together.

But the kids rarely got sick - a benefit of whatever Draxum had put in the gunk that turned them into this, Splinter assumed. Which was a blessing, because he was pretty limited in what medicine he could get in his condition. The boys having a hearty immune system was one of the few things Splinter had going for him.

So he hadn't moved to that conclusion. Instead he said, "Do you need to go potty?" and Blue had considered that very seriously for a few seconds before nodding and rushing off to the bathroom.

Orange threw the plastic phone into Purple's meticulously organized lego piles and Splinter moved on to the next crisis without another thought.

It was at dinner, when he caught Blue pushing his food (mac'n'cheese!) around without interest, that it finally clicked that maybe he should be worried.

"Blue, what's wrong?"

Blue didn't so much as look up. He shrugged, swirling his noodles around and around.

Splinter would be embarrassed to admit how long it took him to remember their earlier conversation, but it eventually came back to him. "Ah... Is your stomach still hurting?"

Blue's face scrunched up in misery, and he nodded.

Splinter groaned in exasperation. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I did!"

"I mean after you went potty."

Blue grimaced. Instead of answering, he scooped up some mac'n'cheese and stuffed it in his mouth. He looked like he regretted it as soon as he'd done it.

"Do not spit that out," said Splinter immediately, because mac'n'cheese was one of the few things Purple would eat and if Blue spat it out in front of him it would go on his Bad Foods list for at least a month. And Orange had a habit of mimicking anything Blue did, which would only compound the problem.

Blue chewed and swallowed the mouthful agonizingly slowly. He looked so miserable afterward that Splinter felt bad about it.

"Are you going to throw up, Blue?" he asked, and got a furious head shake in response. "Are you just telling me that?" Another shake. "Do you want to keep eating?" A third shake. Splinter sighed and took his bowl from him. "Alright. I'll put this in the fridge, if you want it later."

Their mini-fridge was already stuffed full, but Splinter would simply have to make space, or throw all this mac'n'cheese out. He wished they had a bigger fridge, but just getting this back to the juncture in the sewers he called a home had been difficult enough.

He wished he had a bigger fridge. He wished he had a house. He wished he had a pediatrician to take Blue to. He wished he wasn't a rat man. He wished he and his kids were... normal.

It was a bad thought. He knew that as soon as he thought it, and he tried to push it down. The kids didn't need to know they weren't normal. That none of this was normal. He knew that, but...

"Throw up?" he heard Purple say, and then the telltale sound of him pushing his bowl away. Mac'n'cheese was on the Bad Foods list. Splinter groaned.

...

He found their old thermometer after the boys were finished eating. Getting a temperature from Blue was near impossible because he moved it around too much or spat it out before time was up, but Splinter would have to do his best.

After three tries, he got a reading that seemed accurate enough. Blue's body ran colder than a human child's, and it had taken observation and trial and error for Splinter to learn what constituted as a fever. As it was, Blue was only two degrees above his normal. So at least that wasn't too worrying.

He was still complaining that his stomach hurt, though. A stomach bug, then? Or just something he ate? Usually Red was the one who would put random things in his mouth unless Splinter kept a careful watch, but Blue and Orange were... adventurous eaters, too. It was possible.

They continued with their normal bedtime routine. Another thing Splinter had going for him was that his boys loved baths; getting them into their makeshift tub, even with lukewarm water, was always easy. From his research, Red, Blue, and Purple were all aquatic turtles, and Orange was not one to be left out of his brothers’ games no matter his biology.

Blue wasn't excited for bath time tonight, though. He sat quietly in the tub, making grumpy noises anytime he got splashed and playing only with his favorite blue shark toy, ignoring everything else. He definitely felt bad. Splinter was feeling increasingly terrible that he hadn't noticed.

He got them all toweled off and into their pajamas. Then into the pallet beds he had for them, all in one big shared alcove, a tattered curtain strung up for a semblance of privacy. They would need something more as they got older, but for now the boys seemed content to share space.

He tucked Red, Purple, and Orange in, then turned his attention to Blue. He had found an old bucket earlier that he (theoretically) used for mopping, and this he presented to Blue.

"If you are going to throw up, please do it in this," he told Blue. "We don't have any spare sheets."

"Not gonna," said Blue grumpily, pushing the bucket away.

"Ewww," whined Purple. "I don't want to share with Leo if he throws up."

"Not gonna!" Blue insisted, glaring at Purple, who glared back. Splinter sighed and pushed the bucket at Blue again.

"I am serious, Leonardo," he said, and that got Blue's attention. "If you throw up, do it in this bucket."

Instead of answering, Blue rolled over and scrunched himself up in a ball. That was the best Splinter was going to get, he supposed, so he just sighed and put the bucket next to Blue's bed.

"Good night, boys," he said as he got to his feet, ignoring the crackles from his back and knees.

"Good niiiight," came three echoes. Blue was giving him the silent treatment. Alright.

He went back to his own bed, sectioned off by an old divider screen he'd managed to find. Hopefully they could at least get through the night without disaster striking.

...

According to his beat up alarm clock, it was only two hours later when Red showed up by his bedside, shaking him awake urgently.

Splinter groaned his way into consciousness, blinking groggy eyes until his eldest son came into focus.

"Leo threw up," came Red's predictable report.

Splinter sighed, pushing his sheets aside and rising from his futon. "Did he make it in the bucket?"

Red's expression was not encouraging.

...

He had not made it in the bucket.

Blue sat stock still in the puddle of his own sick, eyes teary and expression a mix between stunned and embarrassed. Purple was pressed as close to the opposite wall as he could get, hands pressed tight over his nose and mouth. Orange was at Blue's side, patting his arm with his chubby little hand.

"Blue," Splinter snapped as soon as he saw the mess. "Why didn't you throw up in the bucket!?"

"Didn't think I was gonna," Blue croaked.

"Well, you did. All over your sheets." Splinter ran his hands over his tired eyes. "Now you have nothing for tonight. And who knows if I'll even be able to get the stain out. I may have to go all the way to the surface to get new ones, and do you know what a hassle that is!? The bucket was right here, Blue!"

"I'm sorry."

The miserable hiccup in Blue's voice effectively stopped Splinter's tirade, and he refocused on his son. Blue's tears had spilled over, streaking down his miserable face. He was shivering, hands clutching the fabric of his ruined sheets, wringing them tight. He looked terrified.

"I'm sorry, Daddy," he repeated. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Something inside Splinter cracked.

Leo was only four, by his best guess. He was a baby, still. A sick baby, and Splinter was yelling at him about... about bed sheets?

Blue didn't know that Splinter would have to steal him new sheets. He didn't know that Splinter feared every time he did something so risky, that it might expose their tiny family to hostile forces - the human authorities, Big Mama's goons, Draxum's gargoyles. He didn't know that Splinter should be taking him to a doctor right now. He didn't know that sleeping on a pallet bed in the sewers wasn't normal.

He just knew that he had thrown up, and his dad was mad about it.

Immediately, Splinter stooped and scooped the still-apologizing Blue into his arms. He was getting bigger all the time, and, somehow, Splinter was getting smaller, but he could still hold his boys in his arms, still cradle them against his chest.

"Blue... Leo, listen to me."

"I'm sorry," Blue mumbled again, followed by a sad, wet hiccup.

"Shh, shh, no, my son, please listen." He waited until teary eyes were turned on him to continue. "You don't need to apologize. You did nothing wrong."

"Missed the bucket," said Blue, and Splinter shook his head.

"That's alright. You're sick. It is my job to take care of these things." He scratched at the back of Blue's shell with the arm holding him, something he knew always calmed Blue down. Sure enough, he felt his boy begin to relax. "Do not worry about the sheets. If Daddy needs to get more, he will. For now we will all share."

Blue sniffed, and buried his face in Splinter's chest. That was a good sign. Splinter kept up the scraching.

"I'm sorry I yelled. You aren't in trouble, Blue. You're alright."

Blue sniffled again. Hiccupped one last time. His tears were drying up, and his little voice said, "S'okay, Daddy."

"Oh, my Baby Blue... Thank you."

He still felt terrible as he lowered Leo back to his bed and started to strip away the soiled sheets, but Leo had calmed down considerably. He kept the bucket close, though, even as he laid back down again on his pillow.

"Leo can have my blanket," said Red, already pulling the old thing over. Splinter smiled gratefully at him.

"Thank you, Red. Blue, do you think you will throw up again?"

Blue shrugged. "Dunno."

"That's alright. It's okay if you do." Splinter smoothed the blanket over Blue, not tucking him in so he could move if he needed to. "I'll get this sheet washed out and be back, alright?"

Blue nodded. He was still gripping the bucket with one hand. Splinter rubbed his head, then stood up with his bundle of soiled sheets.

When he returned, with water for Blue, he'd thrown up again - in the bucket, this time. Orange was still by him, rubbing his arm, while Red sat behind him, supporting his back. Even Purple had come close, awkwardly patting at Blue's leg while pointedly avoiding looking at the bucket.

"Thank you for taking such good care of Blue," he told them, getting three beaming smiles in return.

They were all going to have the bug by tomorrow. Splinter would need to find more buckets.

#rottmnt #rise splinter #rise leo #dandy fanfiction #idk what this is lol #thinking about the early years gets me ok

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mafiadad5 · 4 months

Text

Kalopsia

( ka • lop • sia) - The delusion of things being more beautiful than they really are.

Jaehyun x femreader ft. Doyoung

Description- I went back to my college town, my dad worried about me and my safety makes sure to load me with a bodyguard to be safe, little do I know it turns into a whole web of secrets, lies, and history that shouldn’t have been dug up.

Word count- 11.6k

Genre- mafia au (not corny I swear), smut 18+, bodyguard au

Warnings- slight degradation, praising, oral (fem and male receiving), unprotected (plz wear protection yall T.T), 3sum, overstimulation, guns and blood (not too much), alcohol.

No proof read cause heh…

Authors note- hi my loveys! This is my first time writing something with actually plot and full (multiple) smut, I hope you like and please feel free to comment or dm with your thoughts:) I will like to say that the way I deceive them in the story is nothing like their personalities irl and I DEFINITELY do not see them like this. Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy 🎀!

"Hey y/n."

The staff tapped my shoulder as I woke up. "What's up?" I said, removing my headphones from my ears, placing them on my neck. "Well, it's just that your dad is gonna explode if you sit in the plane for another 15 minutes." He said, pointing to his watch. "Oh shit, thank you, Leon." I got up, grabbed my bag, and headed out of the plane, my father waiting for me with a stern face. "Y/n." He said, a smile appearing as he took me into a huge bear hug. "Hey, Dad." I smiled, him kissing my forehead as he hugged me one more time. "Let's go home, I know you're exhausted." He said as Leon grabbed my bags, placing them into the trunk as me and my father got into the car. "I know you're tired and I'm sorry to do this to you on the first day you're back, but get dressed because we're having a dinner meeting tonight." I paused, looking at him. "Dad, already?" He smiled generously, taking a sip of water. "You know the drill Y/n, I don't make the rules."

"You literally do though."

After a long car ride home, we finally made it to our house, it was as glamorous and beautiful as I remembered. I got out of the car, instantly going to the garden, my favorite place, my dad screaming at me to not forget about the dinner. I sat on the bench, the beautiful lake shimmering before me.

"I didn't know you were back butterfly?"

I heard from beside me as I turned. "Marie?" I said as I excitedly ran up to her, giving her a big hug. "Where have you been I thought you quit years ago?" I laughed. "I would never." She said as she smiled, grabbing my hand, sitting down beside me on the bench. "Well, I was going to quit, but I decided to stay my dear."

"So then where's Margot? Or does she hate me? She stopped responding to my messages ages ago, is she mad I left for college in another country?"

Marie paused for a moment, her face changing into a sadder expression as she grabbed my hand, avoiding eye contact. "I'm afraid Margot is gone now." She said, swallowing every tear that was about to fall out of her crystal brown eyes. "Gone where?" I turned to her.

"She is dead, the Korean gang got to her. I tried to save her, but it was far too late."

A tear rolled down her face as I grabbed her hand. "No," I said, there was no way. "She was only a worker why would they even come for her?" "Y/n when we all tell you to be careful, it's for your own good. They would do anything to get your dad upset. They don't want him dead; they want him put away." "I understand." I said as I pulled her into a hug. "You need to quit then go far away." She broke the hug, looking at me in sorrow. "It's far too late, since I've worked for your dad, I will always be a target. Besides, my only job now is to keep you safe, I don't have much to live for anymore."

She gripped my hand tighter looking me in the eyes. "You should be safe because no one knows your location and where you go to school, it was the safest option. Promise me y/n, promise me you'll be careful, don't go out to parties or do anything stupid ok?" "I promise." I said as I gave her one last hug. "Now go get dressed for the meeting dear." I left her there on the bench, as I walked up to my room, checking my phone for the time. I had 3 hours till dinner, so I just decided to chill.

It was time for dinner and Leon walked me down to the meeting, my dad and his partners sitting around the table, Marie giving me a slight smile before turning back serious again. "Hello everyone thank you for showing up, especially my lovely daughter who left school to attend tonight, I promise you'll be flown back tomorrow. We have some important things to talk about." Everyone sat silently, the only noises were my dad and knives and forks gliding on their plates. "The Koreans are starting to make a move now. We need to talk about your roles." I sat, wondering why I was invited to this meeting.

Everyone was quiet, still not saying a word, but we all wondered the same thing. Why now? Someone cleared their throat, making it known that they wanted to speak. "How are they making a move now? They haven't been active for years." My dad looked at his plate, looking back up clenching his jaw. "That's because they know there's something I can't protect anymore." He looked at me, sorrow in his eyes as Marie looked at me as well. "I hired new bodyguards, bodyguards I can trust. Y/n he will assist you, when I say assist, I mean he will keep you safe, but the decisions you make are up to you, there's little I can do from here... you're in control of your own life now."

"I understand Dad."

He wiped his mouth, setting down his napkin. "Now..." he cleared his throat. "I know one of you is a traitor, I invited you in here to let you make your last call, and tell them everything you've heard in this meeting, and also inform them that if they even so, go into the same room as my daughter, they are dead. Leon, please escort Y/n to her room, I change my mind, she needs to leave tonight." He walked up to me, giving me a big kiss on the forehead. "I love you, you're my everything, my only daughter, my life. Stay safe y/n, your bodyguard will be waiting for you when you land."

"I love you too dad."

A tear fell down my eye as I hugged him tightly, Leon tapping on my shoulder, "The planes ready princess, we have to go, your stuff is ready." I went into my room, grabbing the stuff that Leon missed, giving my home one last look before getting into the car. One thing about this lifestyle is that it's nice, but so unpredictable. I might come back and the whole house would be destroyed.

The car and plane ride were long, and I pretty much slept the whole time, waking up to Leon tapping my shoulder softly. He helped me out of the plane, my luggage already outside. "Thank you, Leon." I said walking to the car, going to the driver's seat before someone stepped out in front of me. He had silver hair and beautiful clear skin, his cheekbones were sunken in, and his dark eyes stared daggers into mine. "Hello, you must be y/n?" He said, not moving an inch, still staring at me. "Yes? And who are you supposed to be?"

"I'm Jaehyun, your bodyguard."

He smiled, taking off his black glove, and reaching out to shake my hand. Before I could reach out to shake his hand, Leon held up his gun to him. "That's a Korean name." He looked at him, smiling while holding his hands up. "I'm just a bodyguard, nothing more nothing less." Leon came up to us, pushing me away from him, holding up the gun to his forehead. "Liar."

"Wait, Leon,"

I said, them both turning to me. "Stop Y/n." He said turning back. "No you stop... get in the car." I said to Jaehyun, he instantly sat back in the car, Leon turning to me with a frustrated look on his face.

"Do you trust me Leon?"

"Yes but..."

"Stop it, if you trust me then let me go with him. I'll be safe. That's my bodyguard ok. The Korean gang is not stupid, he wouldn't have said his real name. Let me go." I said, holding onto his hands. "I just don't want you to get hurt Y/n, you're my responsibility." "I'm not 12 anymore Leon, I'm my own responsibility. It's ok, let me go I'll see you soon ok." He kissed my hand, letting them go as he turned to the car before turning back. "Ok, ok. Please stay safe princess, I'll see you soon." He gave me one last look before getting back on the plane, blowing me a kiss, smiling before he left, just like he always did when I was younger.

"Ok princess, are you ready to go?"

I turned around to see him out of the car. "Don't call me that." I said as I walked to the passenger side, him following closely behind me, opening the car door for me. "Let's go mama." "Don't call me that" I said as he shut the door, hopping into the driver's seat, driving away shortly after.

"Where are we?"

I said. We pulled up to a small house in an abandoned area, the only thing lighting the area was a dimly lit warm house light on the outside. "This is where we're staying now" he said, getting out the car, coming over to the passenger side to let me out. "No, I want to go to my house." He popped the trunk, getting my suitcase, walking up to the door entrance as I paced behind him like a lost child. "You will, tomorrow when we go get your stuff. He unlocked the door to the house, opening the creaking door, flipping on the lights exposing the space.

"Um."

The space was small, everything was in the same room except the bathroom, and when I say bathroom, I mean just the toilet and sink. The shower was in the open space as well. "This is a little small." I murmured, walking into the enclosed space after kicking my shoes off, sitting on the couch that sat a few feet away from the bed. "Maybe just a tad bit." He said, taking off his gloves and shoes at the door, walking around the kitchen. "Daddy wouldn't buy me anything this small, what's going on?" He scoffed, walking to the couch, sitting beside me.

"Don't be a spoiled brat, this is fine."

I looked at him, rolling my eyes as he tried to get comfortable, hitting the couch beside him with a distasteful look on his face. "This couch is hard as a rock." I looked at him. "I thought this was fine." I said mockingly as he got up from the couch, doing the same hitting motion to the bed, ignoring what I had just said.

"Better."

"You care about my comfort that much?"

I said, getting up from the couch going into the small kitchen, getting a glass of water. "No, I care about my comfort." He said, looking at the open shower, then looking back at me with wide eyes and a small grin. "You better hope there's another shower here somewhere." "It doesn't matter anyways," I looked at him "You're not staying here."

He looked at me in silence, taking his blazer and white dress shirt off, exposing his black tank top underneath, the tight elastic fabric hugging his toned torso. I'm not gonna lie, I stared a little, maybe even stuttered but he was literally perfect. "Can we just go back to my apartment so we have separate rooms." He looked down, unbuttoning his trousers and pulling down the zipper before looking back up at me. "Your apartment gets raided and I'm in another room or taking a shower, then what? We're both dead." I stayed quiet, examining his body up and down, completely in a daze as his hands gently fiddled with the waistband of his pants.

"Am I distracting you?"

My attention instantly geared to his face, his eyebrows lifting teasingly. "I have to use the bathroom." I said, going to the small enclosed room with only a sink and toilet. "If you're going to touch yourself I want to see." He said, his eyes following me to the bathroom as he chuckled lightly.

"You're sick."

I said, before closing and locking the door. Pulling out my phone to text Leon.

—————————————————————————————

Leon why did my dad get me a house so small?

Y/n why didn't you ask him that yourself 😂?

Leon this is not a laughing manner, you know he's going through a lot, I don't want to sound ungrateful😭.

Don't ask me y/n, are you 👌 ?

Yes

Well goodnight princess, text me if you need anything👍

Ok Leon, goodnight lol.

—————————————————————————————

I sat in the bathroom for another 30 minutes, walking out to find jaehyun sleeping in the bed. My bed. I didn't mind though, he was cute when he slept anyways. I took off my pants, getting in the cold white sheets. Wasn't the most comfortable bed I've slept in, but I'll be ok. I sat scrolling on my phone a little, jaehyun moving around in the spot beside me, groaning slightly as he tried to fix his position, tugging the cover from me.

"Great, he's a rough sleeper"

I whispered out, laying down, facing my back towards him, tugging the cover back. I sat there, staring outside in the backyard, a dimly lit field fading into a dark void. It was intimidating, but somehow I felt safe. My eyes slowly closed as I drifted off to sleep as well.

"Y/n" I heard a faint whisper in my ear, I turned around, thinking it was just in my head, pulling the cover over my ears. I felt someone flick my nose softly, enough for it to wake me up. I opened my eyes slowly. "Boo." Jaehyun laid in front of my face, wide eyed as I jolted away violently. "What the fuck." He smiled, sitting up grabbing his phone. "Well, we have to go get some stuff from your apartment, do you have anywhere else you would like to stop?" He turned to me, my eyes still halfway shut as I nodded. "Where?" I got quiet, turning the other way, placing the cover back over my shoulders.

He jerked the cover off of me, my bare legs feeling a cool breeze as I tried to snatch back the cover, but failed. "You couldn't even put pants on before getting in bed with me?" I sighed, sitting up before grabbing the cover back from him covering myself up. "We're not 12, it's not that serious."

"Don't hide your legs now, they're pretty. Can't wait to make them shake."

My face filled of unamusement as I got up from the bed, stretching before going to the huge window I looked out of last night. " Weirdo" he got up, inching closer to me "Oh you know you want me to-" I cut him off abruptly, "We need window curtains I don't trust this." He sat on one of the bar stools in the kitchen, staring directly at my ass as I watched his reflection in the window.

"You're safe enough with me don't you think mama?"

"Stop staring at my ass."

I said before turning around. His lips folded into a grin as he turned the other way, trying to ignore me. His torso curved as his elbows rested on the granite counter. He had blue and black plaid pajama pants that loosely hung onto his waist, god he was so sexy. He sat his hand in his lap roughly, but delicately, waving it around making my attention gear to his face. "You seem to get distracted by my body easily," he said getting up from his chair, making his way towards me as I backed away from him.

"Do you want me?"

I stayed quiet, backing up until my back hit the window. "Do you think I'm attractive y/n?" I stopped for a second, silently looking at his face, examining his distinct, delicate features. "Mmm... No." I smiled, moving past him going to my suitcase. "Didn't you say we had places to go? Let's go then." I said, going through the clothes in my suitcase. I heard nothing but a door slamming as I turned around, jaehyun going into the bathroom. "Damn, I was just kidding." I whispered, laying back down in the bed after getting dressed. It was a while and he still didn't come out the bathroom, my eyes got heavy quickly as nothing but sounds of nature from the woods leaked into the house, causing me to doze off.

"Get up."

I felt someone shaking my body as I was rudely awoken. "Hmm?" I popped up, rubbing my eyes. I looked out the window, it was completly dark, the only thing lighting the house was a warm lamp that sat on the nightstand beside the bed. "We're leaving now." he said, walking to the nightstand with the lamp, opening the drawer grabbing a silver and black pistol, opening the magazine checking the ammo before stuffing the gun into his waistband.

He turned to me as I sat obviously staring sharply at his every action, raising his eyebrows before turning away from me, heading to the door to put on his shoes. I examined his outfit, a loose fit t-shirt with loose fit jeans. "Oh, so you're dressing casually now?" I said getting up, meeting him at the door, putting my shoes on, grabbing my jacket. He ignored the comment, opening the door, locking it behind me as I walked out.

We made it to my apartment, Jaehyun telling me we didn't have enough time to stop for curtains. I went to unlock my door, but something didn't feel right. I turned the door knob with hesitation, the door opening slowly as I peeked inside, taking a step back, leaving the door slightly cracked, my face turning into a look of panic. "Hurry up, what's taking you so long." Jaehyun's voice echoed through my mind as my heart sunk to my stomach.

"Jaehyun..."

my voice was breathless as I turned to him, a face of annoyance now turning into one of worry. "I think someone broke into my house." He got in front of me, opening the door, his hand under his shirt, gripping his gun. He slowly walked into the apartment, signaling for me to follow behind him as I shut and locked the door behind me so if there was anyone there they couldn't escape. He searched the living room, his gun now up and aimed.

"Sit down"

he mouthed silently, pointing his gun to the sofa that sat in the middle of the dark room. I sat soundlessly, my leg shaking anxiously as nothing but hushed apprehension filled the house. I sat there, a million thoughts racing in my mind as I bit my nails nervously. I was knocked out of my thoughts when I heard a doorknob rustling. I sat for a second, examining the apartment ... all of the doors open. My attention automatically geared to the front door, the doorknob manically shaking.

"Jaehyun."

My voice was shaky as I got up, backing away from the couch and door.

"JAEHYUN."

Jaehyun ran into the room as a loud thud sounded. Everything else was a blur as I ran away from the chaos. The only thing I saw was the light from the apartment hallway in the doorway, and sparks. I shut the door, locking it behind me as intense gunshots and loud thuds sounded, echoing violently in my head. I went to my nightstand, grabbing my small revolver as the gunshots stopped all of a sudden, the house falling silent again. I stepped away from the door, holding my gun up as I heard shuffling coming from the living room. I was ready for anything when I heard the doorknob to the room rustling again, then knocking on the door.

"It's me baby, open the door."

The voice was familiar, and gave me a bit of relieve as I took a deep breath, aiming my gun to the floor.

"Open the door."

I heard him say again. An uneasy feeling settled in my stomach as I held my gun up again, aiming it at the door. I walked slowly as the uneasiness and suspicion of if it was really him raced through my mind. I unlocked the door slowly, quickly opening it holding my gun up, Jaehyun's dark eyes meeting with mine.

"Aren't you a little too pretty for guns?"

"Fuck Jaehyun." I placed my gun on the tv stand, wrapping my hands around him as I pulled him into a tight hug. His hands wrapped around my waist, pulling me deeper into his body, his scent made me almost breathless.

"God look at you."

I said, his white T-shirt now covered in blood. "Get your things quick, before the police get here."

We made it out of the apartment safely, avoiding the police as we got into the car, driving back home. "I'm just gonna stay out here for a little, you can go inside." He nodded reassuringly, stepping inside the house. "Well, I'm going to shower." He shut the door, leaving me outside alone. I took in the fresh air, sitting silently thinking about my life, how chaotic things are all the time, and how surprisingly that wasn't even the first time someone tried to kill me. I reached into my pocket, grabbing a heart-shaped locket, feeling the exquisite patterns that laid on the front of the jewelry, the cold tarnished silver chilling my fingers.

I held onto it tightly, closing my eyes taking in the fresh air, thinking about all the memories, about what my life would be if I wasn't born this way. At times, I wish my life was just normal, I barely had friends growing up, not real ones anyways, well except for one, but all good things come to an end. Thirty minutes passed, I was knocked out of my thoughts when I felt a vibration in my pocket. I grabbed my phone out of my back pocket, Leon's name popping up on my notification center.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Hey princess😊

Hey leon

Just wanted to text you to see if you're 👌

Yea im good leon, im really tired though, so i'll talk to you later.

copy 👍 goodnight princess

goodnight leon

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I walked back into the house, taking my jacket off at the door. Jaehyun sat on the couch manspreading, watching tv. His hair was slightly wet as he had a loose black shirt on, with those same plaid pants on.

"You can leave now."

He looked at me, flipping off the tv as he got up from the couch, looking me up and down.

"Was today not enough for you to not want me to stay with you hm?" he inched closer to me, shooting daggers into my eyes.

"Nope, you can leave Jaehyun."

I said smiling, kicking off my shoes walking to the living room, going to the window. "It's my job to stay baby." He said still not breaking eye contact, his eyes following me. "Well, I'm your boss. Your boss is telling you to leave."

"Oh yeah? As far as I know, you're not my boss, you didn't hire me."

He was inching closer to me taking small steps pulling up the sleeves of his shirt, bringing attention to his muscular yet, soft hands and arms. "As far as I know, I can get you fired?"

"Fire me."

I stood there for a second, quiet, smiling slowly "You know what Jaehyun." I said, moving closer to him.

"What?"

"I think I'd rather fuck you."

I grabbed his shirt, pulling him closer to me with a mischievous smile. "Mmm, I thought it would've been at least a week before you wanted to fuck me. He grinned, the reflection from the outdoor light sparkling in his eyes. "Don't be cocky, just right place, right time situation." He nodded, our faces inches away from each other. "And what do I get out of this mama?" He said, his voice deep and husky, his eyes going pitch black once again. "What do you what?"

He grabbed my waist, our lips separated by nothing more than a conversation, his cold fingers feeling my waist, his voice in a faint whisper

"I want to know more about you over breakfast tomorrow morning."

"Deal"

Jaehyun quickly lowered his lips down to mines, taking no time to roughly kiss me. His tongue traced my bottom lip teasingly before diving into my mouth, his hands holding onto my hips tighter, his nails clawing at my skin ever so slightly. The kiss deepened as he explored my mouth, backing me into a window, the cold glass chilling my hot back. His hands wandered up and down my body, one of them unbuttoning my pants, his lips not leaving mine.

His hands slid into my pants, his fingers dipping lower as he broke the kiss.

"Wait."

He spoke, removing his hands, looking at me in the eyes deeply.

"Didn't you say you were going to fuck me?"

He said, moving to the couch.

"Do it,"

He spread his legs, his boner poking through his pants as he sighed, setting his arms along the edge of the couch.

"Fuck me then."

I walked over to him, getting on my knees in front of him, sliding in between his legs as he smiled, giving me a reassuring nod as I teasingly fiddled with the drawstrings on his pants, slowly pulling them down, not breaking eye contact with his cold eyes. I pulled down his underwear as his eyes filled with lust and determination. I took no time to wrap my hands around his shaft, spitting on his tip as I glided my hands up and down.

"That's it baby, give me what I want."

His hand moved to my face gently stroking my cheek, the warmth of his skin sending shivers down my spine. I slowly lowered my head, his length disappearing in my mouth. "Fuck." He grunted, throwing his head back on the couch. His hips started to move in a rhythm that matched the movement of my tongue, forcing me to take more of him.

"That feels so good baby."

He said in a desperate, but quiet moan, his hips bucking up slightly against my mouth as I took him deeper and deeper. His moans started to grow louder and more frequent, his hands finding their way to my hair, slightly tugging and guiding my mouth, his length throbbing against my tongue, demanding more.

"Fuck mama, right there, just like that."

His grip tightened on my hair, his other hand making his way to the back of my neck, guiding my movements as he pushed deeper into my mouth. His moans grew louder as I took him deeper, tears dwelling in my eyes, my tongue exploring every inch of his dick. His body tensed up as he rose his hips further and further, his hips moving faster as his length starts to twitch in my throat.

"Fuck." He choked out, throwing his head back on the couch, gripping my hair tightly as he released in my mouth.

"Damn."

He said, taking a deep breath, looking down at me, wiping my mouth and the tears that fell. I stood up in front of him. He looked up at me with a sly smirk, slipping off his shirt, his heavenly crafted abs and perfect frame fucking my mind before he even touched me.

"Come here, don't act scared now."

He said, grabbing my hand, pulling me closer. His hands wrapped around my waist, slowly moving down to my hips as he pulled down my pants and underwear in one quick motion, him looking directly at me with that same sly smirk. He pulled me even closer, kissing my bikini line, moving further and further down. He pulled me into his lap, wrapping his arms around my waist.

"You ready baby?"

I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Mhm." He lifted me up, placing his tip at my entrance, slowly sinking me onto his length. "Fuck." I whined out, his hands clawing my hips as he moved me up and down on his dick, going deeper into me every time. "Shit, like that." "This is what you wanted right?" his voice echoed in my mind as he thrusted into me faster, hips bucking up, as my eyes rolled up from the intense pleasure of his length deep inside of me.

"Look at me or I'll stop."

he said, moaning softly in between his words. I looked at him, beads of sweat dripping down his forehead, his hand moving back down to my hips, guiding me up and down. "I doubt it." I said, trying to sound as confident as possible, but not being able to hold my composure. "Oh yea? You want to test that baby?" He slammed me down harder, forcing a moan out of me. "Answer my question."

His free hand made its way up to my face, dragging my lip down with his thumb. "No." I mumbled out, throwing my head back as the intense pleasure sent shivers down my spine. He moaned out, desperate, full of need as he guided my hips sloppily. He grabbed waist, flipping us over, him now laying on top of me. He thrusted roughly as he cursed and moaned into my neck.

"Fuck you feel so good."

He whimpered out, his words vibrating on my skin as I gripped onto his hair, throwing my head back moaning loudly as my body jolted with every curt thrust. "Oh fuck I'm coming." My legs started to shake aggressively, the sensation of his deep breaths and moans on my neck mixed with the hard thrust driving me over the edge. "Well I'm not done." He said, continuing, pushing into me as my walls clenched around him, causing him to let out a quick moan.

"Fuck Jaehyun, please."

I moaned out, removing my hands from his head, placing them on his torso, trying to push him out of me. He instantly grabbed my hands, pinning them to the couch above me. "You can take it mama, I know you can." I threw my head back violently, trying to release my hands from his grasp, but failing miserably as he forced them back down. An overwhelming feeling of intense pleasure fell over my body as he thrusted harder. I shook my head before throwing it back, whining out to him.

"Do you want me to help you, or do you want to keep being bad and keep your hands pinned?"

He whispered in my ear, our bodies clapping together, making an unbearable friction. My loud moans filled the room as tears started to dwell in my eyes from the intense pleasure. "Answer me." "Help me." I mumbled out in a tired moan. He unpinned my hands, wrapping them around his neck. "Pull me when it feels overwhelming, grab my hair if you need to ok, do you understand me?" He said in my ear, his thrust slowing down, eventually stopping as he stayed inside of me. I nodded as he placed his hands beside my head on the couch to keep balance.

"I'm gonna go fast, do as I tell you or I'll stop ok."

I nodded again, his dark eyes looking at me, beads of sweat falling down his forehead slowly. "Tell me ok." He said wiping my tears. "Ok, I will." I felt him twitch inside of me, his head lowering into my neck, looking down for a second as he placed one of his hands on my waist.

He wasted no time, thrusting quickly inside of me. I whined under him while sliding my fingers into his hair, tugging softly. "Well, that didn't take long." He groaned into my neck, teasing the soft skin with subtle kisses. "Fuck." his moaning left tingles on my neck, making their way down my spine. I clenched around his length moaning loudly as he let out panting moans, going even faster in retaliation as my walls fought against him.

"Fuck Y/n, I'm almost there."

Sweet sounds of lust echoed through the house as he desperately thrusted mindlessly, my breath hitching with every movement. I cried out for him, my hands tugging at his hair as his thrust got sloppier. "I'm there, baby." he cried out, panting over me. My legs started shaking aggressively once again, his thrust sloppy as he twitched inside of me. He lifted up my shirt as he let out a choked moan, pulling out of me, releasing his warm liquid on my stomach.

Deep breathing filled the room as he sat beside me on the couch.

"Look at what a mess you made."

He chuckled, a ring of my arousal sat at the bottom of his member.

"I can say the same thing about you."

After a long shower, I had no energy to even get dressed, I lazily found a t-shirt, slipping it on as I sat on the couch, laying my head on the uncomfortable pillow, dozing off slowly as Jaehyun showered, falling asleep eventually.

I woke up, the bright sun shining through the window, burning my eyes as the soft sheets cooled my body everytime I moved.

"Stop moving."

An angry groan came from beside me. "Oh shut up, you're in my bed." I turned over, grabbing the cover, placing it over my head before Jaehyun pulled it back over to him. "Stop taking all the cover." I whined as he sighed, flipping over so he was facing me. "Then get closer to me sweetheart, so we can share." I looked at him, rolling my eyes before sitting up facing my back to him. "You hungry princess?" I nodded, as he handed me the cover "Here wrap yourself up, I'm going to step out for a moment, but get dressed so I can take you to the breakfast you promised me."

I nodded again, wrapping myself up, turning back to look at him, his pajama pants hanging low on his waist, his shirt hanging low on his collar bone. "Distracted again?" He said a small smirk appearing on my face as I saw him smile, his dimple leaving a distinct imprint on his cheek as he walked outside getting his keys from the nightstand

"Can you stop, no I'm not distracted."

He made his way to the door, sliding on his shoes "Whatever you say darling- I'll call you when you need to come outside so we can leave, ok?" I nodded, getting up going to my suitcase, Jaehyun calling me about 45 minutes later telling me to come on.

I put my slipped my shoes on, walking outside to see Jaehyun waiting outside the passenger door.

"Thank you Jaehyun, you're a doll."

An awkward smile painted his face as he shut the door, hoping in the drivers side, making sure the gates shut behind the car as he drove away.

"We're here." He gently tapped my thigh as I lifted my head from the car door. My face had lines and small indents from dozing off on the lengthy car ride. I looked outside to the small restaurant, face lighting up with excitement as I saw where we were.

"No way, I've always wanted to come here. How did you know?"

I turned to him, a questioning expression appearing on my face. He smiled, rubbing the lines on my face. "You're so pretty." His fingers slowly sliding down my face, his hand making its way to my throat, holding ever so slightly, his fingers teasing my skin.

"Is this supposed to intimidate me?"

"Is it working?"

He looked at my lips, then back up at me again, smirking while leaning in, his hand trailing up my thigh. "A little."

"Um, Excuse me. This is not a valid parking spot..."

I quickly turned around, Jaehyun's hand releasing from my neck as we looked at the traffic officer standing outside the window. "You can't even park right?" I laughed as he found a new parking space, rolling his eyes with a smile.

"So..."

He sat in front of me, circling the rim of his water with his finger. "So..." I hummed, looking at him from across the table as he sat awkwardly. "What do you want to know?" I took a sip from my cup, my eyes squinting slightly as the tartness of the juice hit my lips.

"I want to know more about you."

"My name is Y/n, I'm from France, but moved here for college, and I'm the only child of my parents, and the only daughter born into my family. Anything else?"

He made a small smile, looking down at the table before looking back up at me. "Why do you keep a postcard of this place with you." I tensed up in my seat, looking down playing with my fork before taking another sip of juice.

"Because my mom gave it to me, it was her favorite place here."

"Oh she lives here? Where is she?"

Jaehyun said, finally taking a sip of the water he's been eyeing. I looked at him, my head tilting slightly as I raised my eyebrows. It's getting on my nerves how oblivious he's trying to act in front of my face like I'm stupid.

"She's dead, the Koreans got to her, you probably know them right?"

"I've heard a little about them, but not too much, I'm so sorry about that Y/n."

I looked at him, taking a sip from my juice.

"An apology isn't gonna bring her back Jaehyun-"

"WOOOO."

We broke eye contact suddenly, the waiter coming up to us with the food. "Thank you." He hummed, as I smiled enthusiastically, grabbing my utensils.

"There's a party I want to go to tonight."

He looked at his plate, scooping food up into his fork. "Mmm." He hummed, looking up at me. "We're going." I spoke in a demanding tone as he silently finished his food. I looked at him, finishing the last spoonful on my plate. He nodded, looking up at me. "I think you're a bit too old for parties, but hey." He looked up at me, a blank look on his face, placing a hundred dollar bill on the table to pay for the food, getting up pushing his chair in.

"First of all, I'm only 23, second it's an adult party, 21+ at a hotel so don't do that."

I said, following him outside, the cool air chilling my cheeks. "Ok well, I don't feel like getting into another gun fight so please, make sure it's safe." He said as he opened the passenger door to the car for me, his eyes following me as I got in. "I can hire another bodyguard if you don't feel like it" I looked up at him, his hand resting on the top of the car door, his eyebrows raising up as he rolled his eyes.

"Shut up."

"Make me."

I looked up at him, a sly smirk appearing on my face like the one from last night, our eyes locking. "The same way I made you last night?" I turned into the car, looking away silently as he shut the door, getting into the drivers side and driving away, going back home.

Hours passed and the sun started to set as I got ready in front of the mirror, slipping on my black dress, struggling to zip up the back.

"Jaehyun, can you help me with this?"

I asked from inside the bathroom. He walked into the bathroom standing behind me as I looked at him from the mirror. "Can you help me with my zipper." I said, his hands finding the zipper on my dress, his fingers slightly brushing my bare back as he pulled it up slowly, looking at me through the mirror after. "Thanks." I smiled, completing the finishing touches to my lips, looking at Jaehyun still staring at me from the mirror.

"What?"

"It's just taking everything in me to not bend you over on this sink right now."

I looked at him before turning around. "Get a grip." I playfully hit his chest, pushing past him. "Plus you need to get dressed anyways."

"Ok whatever." He said as I smiled, slipping on my shoes at the door.

We made it to the hotel, the dining room a beautiful champagne color with crystal chandeliers. The last time I've been to a party like this was when I was living back at home, so yeah, a pretty long time.

"Oh my goodness I know that's not Y/n."

I heard, the blonde girl standing in front of me. "Hi, long time no see Emily." I sat there with a forced smile, hugging her gently as a man stood behind her. "This is my husband John." She pointed behind her as he gave a smug smile, waving before standing behind her quietly again. "Four years married," she smiled at me. "I must ask, are you married yet Y/n, I know you had a rough time with relationships in college?"

"No, I'm far too young you know. I know you started college late so it's not absurd for you to be married right now, but I'm exploring life."

She gave me a passive aggressive smile, nodded slowly as she took a sip from her champagne glass. "Oh ok I see, you know I was traveling the world before I went to college so I get what you mean, and do you have a job or are you still using your families money?"

"Oh my family has me under control. Speaking of families did your's finally pay your gambling debt, or did you do that on your own?”

Her eyes widened slightly before a forced grin appeared on her face. "Oh Y/n, I think this handsome gentleman behind you is trying to get through."

I looked behind me, Jaehyun standing there looking down at me, his suit fitting him almost perfectly as his bangs hung over his forehead.

"Oh no my dear, he's with me."

I smugly smiled, grabbing his arm, linking mine with his. "Oh really, wow im happy for you y/n... Well I'll leave you two to it, it was nice to see you again." She smiled before turning away, greeting other guest.

I rolled my eyes, turning to Jaehyun as he sat there with an awkward expression on his face. "I can't stand her Jae." I smiled as I rubbed his arm, the feeling of his soft, matte, velvet suit leaving small tingles on my fingers.

"I have to use the bathroom ." He smiled.

"Should I come with you?" I asked.

He shook his head no, before disappearing into the crowd. I sat there for a second quietly, holding my purse tightly in my hand as nothing but people's conversations erupted on all sides of me.

"Y/n?"

I heard from behind me, rolling my eyes slowly not wanting another tense interaction with an old peer. I turned around, forcing another smile yet again, before it dropped, my eyes widening. He was very well put together, a black blazer that almost fit him perfectly, like it was designed just for him. His hair was jet black, messily slicked back.

"Doyoung?!"

I pulled him into a hug smiling, looking into his beautiful crystal eyes as they sparkled. "I thought that was you, how have you been?" He gave a comforting smile.

"Oh I've been good, how have you been?" Before he could answer we were interrupted by Jaehyun.

"Who is this?"

He handed me a drink, looking at him with a smile, then back at me. "Omg this was like my best friend ever in college before I went back home."

"I'm Doyoung." He looked at Jaehyun with a smile, shaking his hand, Jaehyun nodding. "How about we go to the hotel bar so we can catch up without any noise?" Doyoung suggested, looking at me as I nodded in response.

We went to go sit at the bar, Doyoung asking for a vodka on the rocks. "That's a pretty strong drink, do you have a ride home?" I questioned, taking a sip of my margarita, Jaehyun sitting beside me with a sprite.

"Don't be foolish Y/n, I wouldn't drink and drive. I have a hotel room here tonight." He smiled, his eyes squinting close as he swallowed the alcohol, his nose scrunching up. "You're still as cute as I remember when you drink Doyoung."

"Um, I'm here too." Jaehyun cleared his throat as I turned back to look at him.

"Shh, I haven't seen him in forever, let us speak." I turned back to Doyoung, smiling as he chuckled slightly.

"So how have you been Doyoungie, I've missed you." His cheeks flushed light pink for a second as he smiled.

"Well, I've been pretty good, I've visited your home country Canada, and I literally could only think of you the whole time I was there." I smiled, finishing up my margarita, turning to Jaehyun giving him a small smile before turning back.

"I'm honored, I remembered you've always wanted to go there too, I'm happy for you. How's your relationship, are you still with that same girl?" He smiled, resting his hands on his crotch area, laying back in his chair comfortably.

"No, she wanted to break up after she found out we kissed."

"Are you serious? Y'all weren't even together yet."

He did a small laugh, fishing his wallet out of his pocket, placing a crisp 50 dollar bill on the bar counter.

"She thought we hooked up after, I told her we didn't, but she took it upon herself to not believe me." I raised my eyebrows, an astonished expression appearing on my face. "I cant even imagine hooking up with you."

"Let me show you."

The eyes that were once sparkly and doe'd were now darkened and sharp. "Hm?" I looked at him, trying to make sure I heard what he said correctly, or in the right context.

"Let me show you how it is to hook up with me." His voice was husky and low almost in a faint whisper.

I looked beside me to see Jaehyun glued to his phone, not removing his eyes from his screen. "What, you want him to join in? Ask, I like to try new things." He signaled for the bartender, asking for a pen and paper, writing down his hotel room number, sliding it to me.

"Come up when you've made up your mind." He said, slipping away from the bar.

I stood there still, not knowing what to do, getting knocked out of my thoughts by Jaehyun tapping on my shoulder.

"So are we going?"

He said, making me turn around to face him. "Hm?" I said, trying to pull that same card with him. "Going up to his hotel room?" His voice was possessive as he looked at me with stipulating eyes, basically demanding an answer instantly.

"Do you want to?"

"Mmm," He hummed teasingly, reaching to me, grabbing the sheet of paper out of my hand, examining it.

"I know you want to mama, so why are you asking me."

He got up from the bar stool, grabbing my waist helping me up, his dark eyes almost speaking for themselves as I made eye contact with him.

"Keep looking at me like that and I'm gonna fuck you before we even get up there." I stayed quiet, looking forward as he followed me to the elevator.

I stood there awkwardly, waiting for him to come to door, Jaehyun standing behind me.

"Oh you're here, and I'm assuming he said yes?"

He stood at the doorway, that solid black blazer turning into a sheer black one, his black pants sitting perfectly on his waist.

"Speak mama."

Jaehyun said, our bodies practically touching as his hands caressed my waist ever so slightly.

"Yea, mhm." I said, Doyoung's eyes sparkling for a second, going back to its dark demeanor immediately after.

"Well, come in." He said, shutting the door behind me and Jaehyun, leading us to the bedroom.

It was dark, nothing but dimmed blue lights lit the room. That was strange for a hotel room, but before I could even question it further I was knocked out of my thoughts by the zipper of my dress being pulled down.

"We're gonna take good care of you princess." Doyoung said in front of me, slowly pulling my dress off my shoulders.

Jaehyun gently kissed my shoulders, slowly making it to the sides of my neck. "Let me." Doyoung told Jaehyun, causing him to get from behind me. Doyoung pushed me onto the tv stand, getting on his knees in front of me as he slid the rest of my dress, along with my underwear off. Jaehyun grabbed my feet, removing my shoes as Doyoung planted kisses on my leg, slowly making his way up to my thigh.

I rested my hands on tv stand to keep myself balanced as he grabbed my hips, pulling me closer to him.

"You're already soaked Y/n, we've barely touched you." Doyoung said, teasing my folds with his fingers, causing me to suck in a sharp breath.

"Do you want it?" Doyoung questioned, his voice vibrating into my thigh, sending shivers up to my spine.

"Mhm."

My voice was desperate as I closed my eyes, his tongue entering my hole abruptly. Every time he went in deeper his nose made friction with my clit, causing swift moans out of me. His mouth made his way to my clit, sucking and licking passionately, placing a finger into my hole.

"Fuck." I moaned out, wanting to say more, but my words getting choked up on pleasure. I looked up at Jaehyun, his eyes wandering over my body as he watched what unfolded in front of him. He placed another finger in, speeding up his pace as my arousal coated his fingers, his tounge attacking my clit.

"Oh fuck, that feels so good Doyoung. I'm almost there."

I whined out, the sounds of my moans, whimpers, and the mess he was making on my lower half sounded in the room as I threw my head back, gripping Doyoung's now completely messy hair.

He let out small moans and noises that vibrated on my clit, causing me to let out panting moans as he fingered me harshly. "Fuck, I'm there." My body stiffened as I let out a choked moan, Doyoung finishing off, looking at me as he wiped the arousal that was left on his chin.

"Fuck, so messy y/n."

He got off his knees, taking a seat beside Jaehyun on the bed, shining him a sarcastic smirk causing jaehyun to get up. He smiled, walking behind me, trailing his fingers across my collar bone leading to the back of my neck. I looked at Doyoung, his eyes dark, as he titled his head sideways slightly.

"I bet I can make you feel better." Jaehyun whispered in my ear before pushing me down, making my face fall into Doyoung's lap.

I looked up at him to be met with a cold gaze, his hands rubbing over my head, making their way to my face, cupping and squeezing my cheeks forcing my mouth open. "You wanna do something for me princess?" His free hand made its way to his pants, forcefully unzipping them, taking out his member as I looked up at him.

Jaehyun grabbed my hands, placing them behind my back, causing my face to fall further into Doyoung's lap, my back arcing slightly. I tried to remove my hands from Jaehyun's grasp so I could use them on Doyoung, but he pushed them down, holding my wrist tightly together.

"I'm sure your pretty mouth can do well by itself." Doyoung hummed, placing his fingers on my chin causing my head to lift up.

Doyoung looked down at me, opening his mouth slightly, a small twinkle appearing in his eye as I sat my tongue on the bottom of his shaft, lifting my head as my tongue dragged up to his tip. I circled my tongue around the top as I felt Jaehyun at my entrance, teasing my hole. I let out a few shuddered breaths, Doyoung's hands finding their way to my head, softly grabbing and pulling.

"Fuck." Jaehyun cursed as he pushed into me, causing me to let out a whiny moan. I tried to look back at Jaehyun to see what he was doing, but failed when Doyoung turned my head back to his his.

Jaehyun started to pick up the pace, moving aimlessly as he went deeper making perfect thrust causing loud moans out of me. I looked up at Doyoung his eyes on my face as I lifted my head, making my back arch even more. The feeling of my hands being pressed against my back making me almost weak.

"Don't be selfish now."

I took no time setting my mouth on his tip, but this wasn't good enough for him. Doyoung pushed down my head further, my throat tightening around his length causing him to let out a desperate moan. As my head bobbed up and down on Doyoung, Jaehyun made harder thrust making my moans and the loud noises coming from my throat vibrate around Doyoung, causing him to shiver as he gripped my hair tighter.

"Shit Y/n." Doyoung whimpered out, throwing back his head as he let out small moans.

"And don't you dare come until I tell you to Y/n"

I heard Jaehyun curse from behind me, his pace now at an unimaginable speed as I cried out muffled moans around Doyoung's length. Jaehyun let out panting moans as his thrust started to get sloppier by the minute. Doyoung was no better as he let out loud cries and curses.

"I'm there Y/n." Doyoung whimpered out, his dick twitching inside my mouth, his hands grabbing my hair tighter in a way that made sure it didn't hurt. He pulled me off of him, releasing on my face as his liquid dripped down.

"So pretty baby." He smiled, rubbing the tears he created off my eyes.

My moans took no time to escape my mouth as Jaehyun did a few more rough thrust causing him to finish.

"Fuck."

He cursed, removing himself out of me. I took a few deep breaths, looking at Doyoung, his attention gearing towards Jaehyun.

"Where the fuck did you get a condom from?"

Jaehyun looked up at him, shrugging as he threw the used rubber in the trash can.

"Did he make you come baby?" Doyoung looked down at me as I shook my head no.

"Aw, do you want to come baby?"

He looked up at Jaehyun then back down at me as I nodded.

"Would you like me to use a condom too princess?"

He said, helping me up on the bed, my back hitting the cold sheets as my head laid on a pillow. I nodded again causing Doyoung to turn back to Jaehyun again, raising his eyebrows as he put out his hand in command, signaling for Jaehyun to hand him a rubber.

"I don't want to watch this, I'll be out in the living room when you're done y/n." Jaehyun looked at me, grabbing his pants as he headed out to the living room, shutting the door behind him.

"Well."

Doyoung turned around to face me, ripping the condom packaging open with his teeth. He got on top of me, kissing me on the neck slowly, making his way down to my collar bone.

"You're so pretty." He whispered, entering his length into me fully, causing a tired moan out of me.

"Fuck." I moaned out as he went in and out of me, going deeper everytime. "So pretty." He whispered into my cheek, one of his hands on my waist, the other holding my hand beside my head. I let out loud moans as my skin flushed from all the pleasure. My other hand found its way to his hair, tugging as his thrust started to get faster and rougher.

"How does this feel?" He questioned, his voice was breathless, rustier, deeper making the pleasure far more intense.

"Good, I'm almost there." I whined out.

I was reaching my high as he hit my g-spot, causing me to clench around him. He let out a loud whimper, his thrust getting sloppier as he moaned into my neck, his breath leaving tingles along my skin. My legs started to shake violently under him as I felt him smile into my skin.

"This is all for you princess."

He said, looking at me, placing a passionate kiss on my lips as we both reached our highs.

“Wow." He said as we sat there for a second, his dick twitching inside of me.

"Are you going straight home or would you like to freshen up?" He said, exiting out of me, rolling beside me on the bed.

"I'll freshen up real quick."

He nodded, helping me to the bathroom, shutting the door after he handed me a towel and washcloth.

I got dressed after my quick shower, walking out the bathroom to see Doyoung sitting on the bed with his phone in his hand, looking quite frustrated as he fiddled with it.

He turned to me, turning his phone and throwing it quickly away from him.

"I'll walk you out." He forced a smile, grabbing my waist, helping me into the living room.

"Took long enough." Jaehyun said, sitting on the couch. "You ready to go mama?"

He said, getting up, grabbing his keys as I nodded.

"Oh wait, here." Doyoung said, causing me to turn around. He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen, writing something down before handing it to me.

"Call if you need anything ok, it was a Joy having you here tonight Y/n, and uh you." He gave a displeased look to Jaehyun before looking back at me smiling.

"You too Doyoungie." I smiled before walking out the door behind Jaehyun.

—————————————————————————————

Jaehyun.

—————————————————————————————

“I have to step out real quick."

I grabbed my keys from the nightstand, going to the door, slipping on my shoes. I turned to her, her pretty doe eyes staring daggers into mines innocently.

"What?" I said, grabbing my coat.

"Can I come with you Jae?" She questioned, smiling as she got up from the bed, meeting me at the door like it was more of a command than a question. "Um, I don't know Y/n." I said, opening the door, eyeing her as she put her shoes on, grabbing a jacket and scarf.

"I'm coming with you." She smiled, following me outside to the car, getting in the passengers side without any second thought.

I pulled out my phone, sending a text message before pulling off. I looked to my side for a second, Y/n leaning on the car door, her eyes reflecting the moonlight as they sparkled when she looked out the window.

I grinned, turning back to the road, pulling up to a bar.

"Stay here, do not move Y/n, I mean it."

She looked at me, nodding with a smile before looking away, resting her head on the car door again. I took a small deep breath, getting out the car, locking it behind me before making my way to the side of the bar, sitting at a table, trying to get comfortable in the bar stool.

"I got your favorite, Whiskey sour." He slid the drink to me. I raised my eyebrows in appreciation as I took a sip.

"It was clever to host a party like that Doyoung." He smiled, taking a sip from his drink.

"I know, you've never been the brains in the operations I can say."

"Ouch." I laughed, wiping the corner of my mouth as he adjusted the collar on his black shirt.

"You owe me, that party came out of my bank account, a hefty penny." Doyoung took a bite out of the mozzarella sticks that sat in the middle of the table, as we laughed at the foolish statement.

"I do have some bad news though," Doyoung spoke.

"The video we took at the hotel corrupted, so all the footage is gone."

I looked at him, my face in daze as I leaned forward in interest. "Oh god? Guess we don't have anything to lure her dad in with. I'm sure we can try again, she's just as gullible as her damn mother." Doyoung giggled, taking a sip of his drink.

"Why did she look back at you when we were talking about Canada?" He questioned, his elbow resting on the table.

"Oh, she told me where she was actually from, she probably looked back at me to see if I spotted the lie." I smiled, taking another sip from my drink.

"She's probably not scared anymore, when we became friends it was in the middle of the whole fight so."

"Was it your plan to befriend her all along?" I said, swirling my straw in the drink, mixing what ever was left with the the ice cubes.

"No, it was actually a coincidence, I thought she was really pretty and had a crush on her," he laughed "By the time I figured out who she was, she was already gone."

I nodded, my face turning into one of realization as I looked at him, raising my eyebrows. "You were talking about her when we spoke on the phone?"

"Yes Jaehyun, I told you it was her like a thousand times remember, we were so in shock." I looked down, looking back up at him with a small smile.

"Yea I remember now."

"Why, do you think I should ask her out? My dad would kill me." He laughed, leaning back in his chair, grabbing the last mozzarella stick.

"No please don't, she's literally a slut, we hooked up like first night."

His eyes got wide as a smile circled around the mozzarella stick he was eating. He finished it off, his immense smile slowly fading smaller.

"Wait what?" His voice was a little cracked, his smile a little broken as he looked at me. The sparkle in his eyes could make anyone not want to hurt him, even his greatest enemy.

"Yeah, she's a little crazy." I laughed nervously, tapping the table with my finger tips.

"Yeah," he giggled.

"But why would you do that?" He looked at me, his eyes squinting slightly as he titled his head. "Well, she wanted to, and I was bored so I just did it. Plus I got to take her out to breakfast the next morning and find out more personal information about her."

"And what did you find out?" Doyoung said, his face getting far more agitated as I spoke calmly.

"Well she told me she was from France, and that her mom got killed— by us."

"So she told you stuff you already knew."

I gulped, looking at him timidly as I nodded. "Yea."

"So you hooked up and then took her on a date after I told you I liked her."

I looked down, staying completely silent as his upset aura soundlessly hit me in a way that hurt more than any physical punch.

"Doyoung." I said, following him as he got up from the table, walking to the alley behind the bar lighting a cigarette.

"Jaehyun, please get away from me. I am going to freak out on you."

"Doyoung I swear it was nothing."

He leaned on the wall, pushing the bud of the cigarette on the cold concrete of the bar.

"You know, you've always gotten everything you've wanted since we were kids, it's not fair." He looked up at me, his face full of indignation.

"Doyoung, it's not that serious I swear."

"But it is though. I want what I want too— I want something to myself, without having to share."

I looked at him, trying to make the conversation less daunting. "I'm the reason you even got to hook up with her in the first place, be grateful."

"Oh thanks for the handout Jaehyun, Im really grateful you left your leftovers for me." He walked up to me, an unsettling feeling washing over my body as I looked into his eyes that have now turned completely dark and cold.

"You give yourself way too much damn credit Jaehyun, in all reality you're just an asshole that only cares for yourself."

He was about to say something else, but choked on his words; rolling his eyes before walking away from me.

"Doyoung relax you can't even date her so I don't get what the big deal is." I shouted to him, my words getting choked up as regret and guilt spewed into my brain.

"You just don't get it do you." He paused, turning around to face me, his eyes filled of sorrow, voice shaky as he gave me a pitiful look.

"I'm sorry I said that Doyoung, I really am, but don't let something like this ruin our friendship."

"I was never your friend Jaehyun—" he took a deep breath, his eyes turning back cold.

"In fact, I hate you."

He reached into his pocket, pulling out an all black matte gun.

"Don't say that Doyoung, no you don't." I looked at the gun, then back up at him.

"I hate you, a lot. I wish my dad would've left you in that alleyway." He pointed the gun at me, his finger methodically finding its way to the trigger.

"Please, put the gun down. I'm sorry Doyoung, please just put it down. I won't do anything with her again."

"Oh I know." He sarcastically smiled.

"Goodbye Jaehyun— Fuck you."

I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, covering it up with my hands as I looked down, blood covering my fingers. I looked back up at him, a shocked expression on his face like he didn't think he would do it either.

I fell to the ground, looking up to the night sky, holding my wound taking it in as I got lightheaded.

"Jaehyun." A familiar voice rung in my ears as I just laid, ignoring it. I felt someone lift my head up and a tight pressure on my lower abdomen.

"Jaehyun it's gonna be ok, just look at me, you're gonna be ok." I saw Y/n's face ever so slightly, my vision blurring slowly as I fell weaker. "HELP!" I heard her scream over and over again, my vision getting weaker as the sounds surrounding me started to fade as well.

I looked to the stars again, closing my eyes slowly till everything was dark and I couldn't hear anymore.

—————————————————————————————

"He lost a lot of blood, but he's in surgery now and there's a very high chance that he will survive."

I looked at the doctor from my seat. My eyes were nearly shut as I sat there with my leg shaking anxiously.

"How long till I can see him?" I questioned, my voice raspier than usual.

"Let me go check on that for you Miss." I nodded, taking out my phone. I took a piece of paper out of my pocket, examining it before typing the digits into my keypad. The phone rang for a few seconds then I heard his voicemail.

"Hi this is Doyoung! I can't come to the phone right now but keep a look out because I'll call you back soon. Bye-bye!"

I took a deep breath, looking at the floor before hearing foot steps approaching me.

"Hi ma'am, it should just be two more hours and then you'll be able to see him. Can I get you anything while you wait?"

"No thank you." I smiled numbly, resting my head on my head as I dozed off slowly.

"Ma'am?"

I heard as I woke up a bit disturbed. The unpleasant feeling of the hospital lights shining in my eyes making me grumpy.

"Ma'am. He's out of surgery, you can follow me up to his room." The nurse said, looking at me with a slightly concerned look on her face. I followed her to his room, his eyes closed as he peacefully laid on the hospital bed.

“I know you’re probably tired so I’ll talk to you in the morning Miss…?”

“Y/n.” I smiled, my eyes puffy as she gave me a sympathetic smile, shutting the door behind her as she left the room. I looked back at him, walking to the hospital bed, biting my lip uncomfortably as I looked at him.

“I’m glad he didn’t leave you in that alleyway.” I whispered, half of me hoping he heard me, but the other half hoping he didn’t, hoping he didn’t find out what I was keeping from him in this way.

“I’m glad.”

I rubbed his cold, soft hand before finding my way to the couch that sat beside the bed. I laid, placing my jacket over my body as I looked at Jaehyun, the only thing moving was his chest as I followed the rhythm of his breathing with my tired eyes, dozing off soon after on the uncomfortable couch.

—————————————————————————————

To be continued …🎀

—————————————————————————————

Authors note- hi again! Sorry to leave you on a cliff hanger, but I will be going on a short break. When I come back the whole story will be posted, please feel free to dm me or comment if you would like to be tagged in part 2! I’m gonna say it again, but obviously their personalities are for the plot and I DO NOT think they are like this, or would do this. I hope you liked part 1 my loveys can’t wait to post part 2 for you🩷!

#kpop smut #nct x reader #nct smut #nct fanfic #18+ content #nct 127 #jaehyun smut #jaehyun fanfic #doyoung smut #doyoung fanfic #jaehyun x reader #doyoung x reader #nct mafia au #nct 127 smut #kpop fanfic #nct #nct imagines

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dorotheataylor · 3 months

Text

Hugs and kisses

Pairing- Peter Parker x GN!Reader

Summary- Sometimes even the strongest ones need comfort and Peter finds it in your arms.

Warnings- none literally, this is just a soft fic coz peter deserves all the love and hugs in the world, my poor english is a warning tho :’)

Word Count- 687

A/N- I thought of this while listening to ‘Sweet Nothing’ by Taylor Swift and here it is. Also I changed fandoms lol. dw i still write for harry potter but i’ll write for marvel too now. And this can be read for any peter but I imagined tasm peter here :3 Hope y’all like this <3

You were about to get into bed, after having done your nighttime skincare and changing into your pyjamas, when you heard soft knocks on your window.

You went over to open it, knowing it was Peter. Whenever he visited you after his night patrols, it was always near this time. You would go on about your day while he told about his and then went to sleep together while snuggled close to each other.

Today it seemed a little different. Because when you moved the curtains to get a look at him, his expressions were different from what they always were. Like he was upset about something.

You quickly unlatched your window and let him inside. You turned to face him and furrowed your eyebrows when he didn’t meet your eyes.

Something was definitely up.

“Peter, love, is everything okay?” you said softly, not wanting him to break. “You know you can tell me anything,” you start, wanting to break the silence, but he flinches at your voice. you let out a shaky exhale and step forward, reaching a hand up, slowly, like approaching a skittish animal, to press your palm to his cheek. he unconsciously chases the warmth, his hair parting to reveal his eyes, sadder than you’ve ever seen them. your heart lurches for him. “oh, Peter.”

He leaned in your touch and sighed in content. Slowly you lifted your other hand to cup both his cheeks while he looked on the verge of tears.

“I- I just needed to see you. He- he said that,” Peter couldn’t even bring himself to properly say that. After that random bad guy he had just fought told him he had attacked you, he needed to make sure you were okay.

“It’s okay, Peter. I’m here.” You said, voice still soft as you start to caress his cheek with your thumb.

Peter couldn’t keep it in anymore, as he immediately buried his face in your neck and held you tightly, as if he were afraid you’d disappear.

You, on the other hand, couldn’t stop your heart from breaking after seeing him in such a state. The way he sounded, the way you could feel his tears on your neck, you couldn’t help but shed some tears as well as you spoke soothing words to him.

Moments like these brought comfort to Peter. Him in your arms, you holding him tightly, speaking softly and trying to comfort him, he sometimes wonders what he has done to deserve this, to deserve you. Your arms were his go to place when things got hard, being spiderman wasn’t easy. And it felt great that you out of all people knew about him and still loved the real him.

Both of you stayed in each other’s arms for what felt like an eternity, with none of you wanting to let go of each other. But you didn’t mind it, Peter deserved all your love and affection.

After few moments, you slowly spoke, breaking the comfortable silence you both were in, “lets get you changed so that we can cuddle in bed. Sounds good?”

He seemed hesitant to let you go, but he loosened his grip and pulled away to look you in the eye, arms still loosely wound around your waist. He seemed almost meek like this—to the point it almost felt like you’re not looking at the strongest. Right now, it kinda just feels like you’re looking at a man—a man who has the entire weight of the New York on his shoulders.

“Thank you, Y/N.” He said, his voice still wavering. “You- You’re everything. God I love you so much.”

You smiled gently at him as you cupped his cheek again, he kissed your palm, and you said, “I love you too, Peter. More than words can express.”

With that, Peter cupped your face and brought his lips onto yours, pouring all his love, affection, fears and everything he felt for you into it. You kissed him back with same passion, sealing a promise of never leaving him into this kiss.

Because maybe in that moment, this was all you both needed.

#marvel #peter parker #love #taylor swift #peter parker x reader #peter parker x y/n #peter parker x reader fluff #marvel comfort #comfort fic #sweet nothing #marvel cinematic universe #marvel fluff #peter parker fluff #fluff #tasm peter parker #tasm!peter x reader #tasm!peter imagine #tasm!peter fluff #tasm!peter x y/n

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aerowolf · 24 days

Text

the mercs realize it's your bday and you didn't tell anyone because your family doesn't do birthdays

I’m so sorry this is a mess between British and American english. I have an American parent and a Canadian one so it messed me up lolll

if didn't include a Merc you wanted, feel free to request and I'll try and add them :]

includes: Miss Pauling & offense classes

cute platonic, gn!reader

warnings: n/a, this is basically all fluff

You'd rather not make a big deal of it being your birthday, even though it is you were taught that birthdays aren't a big deal and your family never really did them.

You kind of wish someone would care but you feel guilty about that so you choose not to tell anyone about it

The only one of these who actually knows it's your birthday is Miss Pauling, who’s seen your personnel files

Miss Pauling

She knows it's your birthday, and instead of ignoring it she decides to at least discreetly make it a good day for you

She arrives on base for a routine inspection, clipboard in hand, but once she's done with the main thing, instead of leaving, she comes to your room

"I saw that it's your birthday today. I don't know if you celebrate, or anything, but, uh, I thought you'd like a gift. Maybe."

She hands you a box, inside are some candy bars and a plush of a bear

"I know it's not exactly the nicest thing, and I know it's kinda... stereotypical... but, y'know, I thought you'd like something. So, happy birthday. From me.” She’s really shy about it, you get the feeling she didn’t--probably still doesn’t--really get to celebrate birthdays either.

She offers you a ride on her motorbike, something nice, on the open road--away from this base for a little while. You accept, taking a seat behind her, enjoying the open air--though it is pretty hot out. You guys talk, just enjoying the time.

She smiles at you as you get back. “Happy birthday. You deserve it.”

You thank her and even give her a hug. It’s nice that you got this for once.

Scout

He has no idea whatsoever that it’s your birthday. He’s interacting with you like usual, teasing you, just hanging out. You’re happy as you talk that day; he’s always good at making you laugh and smile.

At some point he notices that you’re a little down, as much as you may try to hide it, he can tell. You’re his friend, and even though he might act like he doesn’t care sometimes, you know he does. A lot.

You tell yourself you don’t want anything on your birthday, that it’s easier if no one knows, but secretly, you do.

“Hey, what’s up? C’mon, ya know I can tell when something’s wrong.”

You tell him it’s nothing.

“You sure? Really? You’re kinda… I dunno, sadder than usual.” After he asks a few times, you finally come out and tell him. You don’t say much. Just “It’s my birthday.”

“No kiddin’? Well, why didn’t ya tell me?” He comes off pretty strong. You feel kind of apologetic for mentioning it, and look away from him. “Aw, hey. Y’know what--it don’t matter. I’m gonna throw you a party like you ain’t never seen, believe me.”

You try to tell him you don’t want a party--well, you do. Maybe. No you don’t. Well, sure. But not a big one. He’s really sweet and enthusiastic about it. “Someone like you deserves a big birthday--but if you don’t want it, dat’s okay. Ya know, we could just hang out, or somethin’. You n’ me, yeah?”

You tell him you’d like that a lot. You both find a quiet spot in the base where you can just talk. He messes around, too, and pops in a Tom Jones record.

He’s a little shy, a little embarrassed, but he even sings happy birthday to you. He just seems glad no one can hear him. He doesn’t have a gift handy for you, but he ends up scribbling you a quick doodle of him telling you happy birthday. It’s misspelt, but the drawing is cute, and you keep it. “I hope ya had a good day. I’m just sorry I didn’t know sooner.” You tell him that it wasn’t his fault, how could he have known?

After all is done, he gives you an awkward hug. You smile and return it.

Soldier

He’s a little crazy so he’s just hanging around base, today he had the idea to strip and cover himself in honey, so everyone has had to convince him to please not do that, and now he’s just moping around, muttering about how anti patriotic this all is.

You sit next to him and mope as well. Unlike him, no one knows the reason you’re moping. To anyone else’s point of view, you’re just comforting him--for whatever weird reason. But he sees that you’re just as sad as him.

“What’s wrong, maggot? Is there someone who needs to see my fists meet their face?”

You tell him no, no one did anything. You’re a little intimidated by him, and you don’t see much reason to tell him anyways. But it’s nice sitting with a friend.

“If it’s not a person, then… it must be an object! Give it to me and I will destroy it immediately.” He’s being as sweet as he can, you smile and shake your head.

You sit there for a bit, smiling as you watch the other mercs come and go. Today isn’t a bad day, just a little sad. Later, you plan to find some kind of sweet treat to eat alone.

Soldier stands up, at attention, and points at you. “MAGGOT, AS YOUR SUPERIOR AND SENIOR, I ORDER YOU TO TELL ME WHAT IS WRONG!”

With a sad smile and a chuckle you finally tell him.

“Your birthday?” Soldier seems genuinely surprised. He places a hand on his chin and thinks. “We cannot go without celebrating! This is momentous!”

Although you try to protest, he turns to the base, stating to every other merc, “LISTEN UP! IT IS Y/N’S BIRTHDAY AND WE WILL CELEBRATE!”

He makes it his personal mission to decorate for a party that very evening, even gets a cake and everything. He makes every other merc sing happy birthday with him. Maybe this isn’t so bad.

You give him a big hug, and he is surprised at first, but proceeds to give a gentle laugh and hug back.

Pyro

You see Pyro colouring with crayons and coloured pencils on their break, and you sit by them. You don’t really understand what they’re saying a lot of the time, but you enjoy hanging out with them. It’s a long period of silence before you join them in colouring. Regardless of your artistic skills, they’re impressed and encourage you, and are very happy when you show them what you’ve been working on.

After a little while you get kind of bored and sad. You’ve tried to enjoy this day but it’s another bittersweet birthday. You’re happy to hang out with Pyro though, even though they don’t know what day it is.

Pyro notices that you’ve stopped colouring with them, and that you’re looking at the ground instead, messing with the cracks in the floor.

“Huddah hrmmf mmmrph?” You don’t understand what they’re saying exactly, but you smile at them. They seem to be asking what’s wrong, why you stopped, why you seem so sad.

You hesitate for a moment before finally confessing. They seem to mostly understand what you mean, and they lean back, thinking.

After a few seconds, they stand up and help pull you off the floor. They point to their room, and you follow them. It’s an odd combination of scorch marks, colourful drawings, weapons, and art supplies. They lead you to a wardrobe and pull out a box.

Surprisingly, you can see that it's fully wrapped. Did they somehow know it was your birthday? Do they keep these gifts on hand for the mercs?

You won’t get an answer, but they excitedly push it out and offer it to you. “Huddah hmmph!” They sound almost like they are smiling behind the mask. You take the box and open it. It’s got crayons, pencils, and… wow, that’s a drawing of you and them.

You smile, almost ready to tear up, and thank them. You give them a hug, and you notice that they’re hugging you back even harder. Maybe they don’t really understand, but this is sweet.

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youreobsessedwithtoomanyfandoms · 2 years

Text

Did It Even Mean Anything?

Words: 1682

Warnings: angst, breakup, being played, only dating someone on a bet, probably poor writing but whatever

STRANGER THINGS Masterlist Main Masterlist

Request: "Gareth and Jeff make a bet with Eddie about not being able to get a date or a girl in general. Eddie asked out the quiet girl thinking it would be an easy bet, but realize they have a lot in common. Maybe the next day at school she finds out about the bet from over hearing it from Gareth and Jeff talking to Eddie. Ending of their reaction is up to you."

I have such a love/hate with this trope dude. Like, I love it, but I hate it at the exact same time.

I also hated making Gareth be the dick that he is in this. I love that guy so much man.

*EDIT AFTER WRITING AND POSTING*

THERE WILL BE NO FUCKING PART 2! I WROTE THIS WITH NO INTENT OF ONE! THEN THIS BECAME MORE POPULAR THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD! AND PEOPLE WERE DEMANDING ME TO MAKE A PART 2 AND I WON'T FUCKING DO IT CAUSE YOU FUCKING DEMANDED IT AND YOU SHOULDN'T DO THAT! PLUS, I WOULD PISS Y'ALL OFF BY MAKING IT EVEN SADDER THAN IT ALREADY IS! IF YOU TRULY WANT ANOTHER PART THAT'LL BE HAPPY, WRITE IT YOURSELF!

I'm not trying to be an asshole I'm just tired of people asking for it when I have told them in the comments AND THE REBLOGS that I wasn't sure about it. But now I've decided to not.

But please, read this and continue to like it.

Anywho, enjoy

Eddie smirked at Y/N as he leaned against the lockers next to hers. She was quiet. Well, more reserved than most of the other girls that he knew of. And he knew that she had a crush on him. "So? What do you say, princess? Tomorrow, 7 o'clock? I pick you up at yours?" She stared at him with wide eyes before smiling softly and nodding. Eddie let out a small laugh, "You gonna use your words, darling?"

She felt her face heat up before letting out a soft, "Yeah." She cleared her throat and spoke a little louder, "Yeah, I would like that a lot."

He smiled, "Good. See you then." She nodded as he walked away.

And as he walked away, she turned to her locker and grabbed all of her books and piled them into her back. She couldn't believe it! Eddie Munson, the guy she had had a crush on since she met him her Freshman (his Sophomore) year, had just asked her out. She was ecstatic.

But she was also surprised. Eddie knew who she was? They had only ever spoken to each other 2 times. One was when he had asked her for a pencil. And the other was when he had asked what he missed in Mrs. Click's class because he had missed the past three days.

But that was 2 and a half years ago.

However, she stopped her worrying and walked out to her car. Excited that literally anyone had just asked her out. But she was also nervous because she had never been on a date before. So she had no idea what to do or wear.

However, unknown to her, Eddie was walking into the Hellfire room with the biggest shit-eating grin he had ever had. He opened the door, and with his luck, only Gareth and Jeff were there. He slammed his hands down on the table. "You two boys now owe me a hundred dollars each."

Gareth raised an eyebrow, "Why's that?"

"Because I just got my ass a fucking date."

Jeff scoffed, "Yeah? With who?"

"Y/N Y/L/N."

His friends started laughing. "Y/N Y/L/N? The girl who had literally had a crush on you since she met you?"

Eddie smirked, "You didn't say it couldn't someone easy. So pay the fuck up." Gareth and Jeff looked at one another and Eddie groaned, "Now what?"

"Date her until the end of the school year and you'll get your money."

"That wasn't the original fucking plan!"

Gareth shrugged, "Yeah, but we realized that you'll just go on one lousy date with her. Maybe even try to sleep with her. Then toss her to the side. Because we all know that you can't commit."

Eddie groaned, "You guys are literally the fucking worst."

They both shrugged this time, "You chose to befriend us, Eddie."

Eddie rolled his eyes, "Whatever." He ran a hand through his hair, "So I just have to date her until May 25th?" The other two nodded, "Fine. I guess I can do that."

Unfortunately for him, he would realize just how much he would fall for Y/H/C girl he just asked out on a bet.

Eddie was sitting next to Y/N in the back of his van at the Drive-Thru. Neither were really even watching it as they were just talking to each other. He was surprised to find out that she liked a lot of the same things he did.

"Actually, Rocky Horror is gonna be showed a town over in two weeks. I was planning on going, maybe, if you wanted, we could go together." The smile on her face as soft as she asked him.

He returned the smile and nodded, "That would be fun." He leaned back, against the side of his van. "One question. Do you dress up?"

She laughed, "Of course I do! Usually I do Janet as that's all that I really have clothes for. But I recently found a old maids outfit that I'm gonna fix up to look like Magenta. Hopefully it'll be ready in time."

He grabbed a piece of popcorn and popped it into his mouth. "I bet it will be."

He laughed lightly and she smiled at him confused. "What?"

"I just...I don't get this. You're literally so...perfect. I mean. You're so nice, you like the same things as me, and you're hot." She felt her face heat up at the last comment. "You're like a dream come true Y/N Y/L/N."

She smirked, "What? Did you think that I was gonna like a lot of popular stuff?"

"Kinda?"

She laughed, "I do like some of it. There are some chick-flicks that I love. Some music. I just like whatever I like."

He nodded, "What's your opinion on DnD."

"I've never played. But it seems pretty interesting. I don't really understand why people say it's 'satanic'. And that people who play it are 'devil worshippers' and 'evil'. Games don't make being evil. It's what they're surrounded by that do it."

He smiled, "I like your thinking."

For the rest of the film, the two of them continued to just talk about different things that they liked. And Eddie continued to be surprised that the two of them liked the same things as each other.

But the guilt that he just asked her out on a bet grew more and more.

The two had gotten together in January and now March was ending and April was starting. Eddie had truly started to fall for Y/N after a week. But he kept feeling guilty that this all started because of a stupid bet he had made with his friends. He had felt like he was using her this whole time. But he knew it wasn't true. Everything he had said and done had been true. And when he told her that he loved her. He had meant it.

But he knew he would have to tell her the truth at some point. Even if he knew that he would hurt the both of them. But he wasn't going to do that until after he talked to Jeff and Gareth and called the bet off.

Y/N walked down the hall to the Hellfire room. She had to ask Eddie if she had left her jacket over at his trailer. But she felt her blood run cold when she overheard a conversation that she knew she shouldn't have.

"-You can't do that dude! You calling off the bet means that you have to pay us! I thought that you hated losing!"

"Yeah? Well I didn't plan on actually falling for her! I can't go through with the fucking bet! It'll just hurt her!"

"That's your fault bro. You knew that this could happen, but you went through with it. You asked Y/N out on a bet, knowing that you easily could fall for her."

She hadn't realized that she walked into the room fully until she dropped the books in her arms and the three boys turned to her. Guilt covered Eddie's face when he saw her. And he was barely able to get her name out before she ran out of the room. He cursed under his breath and turned to Gareth and Jeff. "The bet is over. I'll pay you two tomorrow." And then without even giving them a chance to respond, he ran out to find Y/N.

He had a good idea where she would be. He remembered something she had mentioned once about a place in the woods. Different than the place he would meet people for deals. She had shown him it once. And when he made it to there, he felt his heart break. He heard her crying. And it pained him to know that she was crying because of him. Because of what he had done.

As a twig snapped under his foot, her head snapped around. She wiped the tears away from her eyes. "Leave me alone."

"Princess-"

"No. No don't. Don't do that." She stood up, "Don't sit there and say 'princess' and act all innocent. Act-act as if...as if this isn't all a lie!"

He shook his head, "It isn't a lie! I do love you! More than anything!"

She shook her head, "I was nothing more than a fucking bet. You asked me out just so you could...could what? Get money? Prove that you aren't a fucking loser?"

"Y/N I-"

"Was any of it even real?"

"What?"

She walked over to him and poked his chest, "Any of it? Was. It. Even. Real. Did you mean any of it? Or was it all apart of the fucking bet?"

"I meant everything I said and did!"

She let in a shaky breath, "Why me? Why did you choose me to be the fucking victim?" She laughed, "Actually. No wait, let me guess. You asked me because you thought I would be easy. Because you knew I had fucking liked you for years. Am I right?" He stayed silent. She was right. He had originally asked her because he knew that she would say right. She let out a small, dry laugh. "I should have fucking known. It was all too good to be true. I mean, why else would Eddie 'the freak' Munson ask me out? Why else if I wasn't just supposed to be another notch on his belt?" She looked at him, "Well, go find yourself some other girl to fuck with. Because we're fucking done." She pushed past him, but not without saying, "God, I wish I never had been seen with the freak of Hawkins."

And he watched as she walked away and felt him heart tear into a million pieces. He knew he had fucked up. He knew he should have told her the minute he gained feelings. But he didn't and now he had fucked everything up.

And now the one person who he had actually fallen for, hated him more than anything.

#eddie #munson #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson request #stranger #things #stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things imagine #stranger things request #x reader #imagine #request

6K notes · View notes

rogersideup · 2 months

Text

｡°✩ ♊︎ The Gemini♊︎ ✩ °｡

Chapter 5:

Rearview

Series Masterlist

Previous part: Pink Peonies Next Part: Little Birdie

Word Count: 6,610

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. Mentions and descriptions of sexual acts, anxiety, and sever depression.

Gentle knocks barely caught Bucky's attention from his spot on the couch in his apartment. All the lights were off, and it was quickly nearing bedtime as a show played a little louder than it probably should.

He thought he was hearing things until it happened again, this time he got up and looked through the peephole in his front door. To his surprise you were standing there.

The door swung open with a sense of urgency and Bucky on the other side. His eyes were immediately soft and concerned, his posture relaxed as he leaned onto the doorframe.

"Bug, what happened to you?" He questioned sounding sounding worried as he took in your appearance.

Comfortable work out shorts and a hoodie was pretty much all you wore during your time off of work in the building that always seemed to be air conditioned to a temperature a few degrees below your comfortability, but this time your hair was thrown up in a messy bun, your cheeks pink and your eyes and nose red, but the main point of concern was your arm in a sling.

Bucky had been way better at respecting your boundaries and giving you the space you needed to heal more than anyone else in your life at the moment, and right now, you just really needed a friend. You had some reluctant confidence that he would be willing to listen to you, maybe even give you a hug if you were lucky, and you were also reluctantly confident in your ability to forgive him at this point.

"Hey, I'm really sorry to bother you but I was just hoping you had a few minutes to talk about what happened today?" You pitched.

Bucky was admittedly taken back by your appearance. Your mental health was taking a toll on you, and it was becoming evident. Even since he last saw you a week ago at your evaluation, you looked sadder, frailer, and smaller.

His hand latched onto the upper arm that wasn't in a sling and he gave it a gentle squeeze as he stepped into the hallway, letting his door close behind him.

"Tell me about it" he nodded.

"Um, Harvey yanked my arm back and trapped me against the wall in the hallway earlier today. He dislocated my shoulder" You admitted with a big deep breath, really trying to keep your composure. "I went to the med bay, they popped it back in place but suggested I rest it and take it easy for a few days, hence the sling."

"Oh you poor thing, that sounds painful." Bucky's eyebrows furrowed. "Are you okay?"

You let out a sad chuckle. "No, I'm not." The admission slipped past your lips for the first time ever.

"M'sorry" Bucky sunk into himself.

"Right after it happened I went to training with Steve, it didn't go well." You explained. "He got mad that I was late, and he really wasn't interested in hearing about what made me late or why I was clutching my shoulder and crying. He grabbed my arms and pulled them behind my back then tied my wrists together. The doctor thinks it wasn't completely dislocated until I had to get myself out of the rope. He gave me pain killers and a pretty strong dose of Xanax to calm me down from the panic attack I was having because of him."

"Steve did that to you?" Bucky questioned quietly in disbelief. "I can't believe he did that."

"I don't think he meant to, but whether it was his intention or not, it happened and the bridge has been burned." You gently nodded. "I couldn't believe it either."

"I don't know what to say." Bucky shook his head sadly.

It was evident that Bucky was stuck between a rock and a hard place in this situation. He kept doing what he thought was right, but he still felt immense guilt that his friends were hurting as a result of it.

"You don't need to say anything." You reassured him. "Rogers made it clear that he's not my boss anymore, and Commander Bennett is sleeping so I figured you'd be next in line as a higher up to make informed that I can't report for duty for a minimum of 24 hours because I'm under the influence of benzodiazepines. It's noted in my medical chart."

"Okay, you rest up and I'll make sure to tell him in the morning." Bucky noted. "How are you feeling right now?"

"A little out of it, but the pain isn't nearly as bad so that's all I could've ever hoped for."

"Mental or physical?"

"Both." You admitted. "I'm sure I'll be feeling a lot worse tomorrow, but I'll leave that to be a problem for myself in the future."

"Steve mentioned to me that you quit the rest of training with him, is this why?" Bucky questioned hesitantly.

"Yeah, it is." You sadly confessed. "Ever since the initial fight, seeing him every day has been pretty hard. After today I realized I really need to prioritize my health before being a good agent. I can't go out and fight on a battlefield if I can barely get out of bed anymore. Plus with my shoulder I can't do strenuous physical activity for a week, and after that there would only be one more week of training left so it would be pretty useless."

"Prioritizing your health is important to being a good agent." Bucky reminded you. "Although it makes me sad to hear, I hope you know I'm proud of you for sticking up for yourself to anyone that's causing you pain."

"Thanks." You crossed your arm close to your body, chickening out on the conversation you initially came for.

You weren't stupid, you knew there was a reason why he wasn't inviting you into his place, and that reason was either Natasha or Steve. Either way, you didn't want to interrupt.

An awkward silence fell over the two of you, and it made your skin crawl. Both of you were far too wrapped up in your own heads just trying to find the right thing to say to each other, but the words never appeared, so you put an end to it.

"oh...and uh thanks for handling Commander Bennett in the morning. It'll be nice to sleep in and not have to worry about waking up early."

"Does he know you're going to quit training? I can tell him about that too."

"He doesn't, but that's not in his jurisdiction anymore so it's fine."

"Got it." Bucky nodded.

"See you around." You awkwardly lifted your hand in an attempts to wave and walk off.

"Hey, would it be okay if I checked on you tomorrow?" Bucky asked. "It's okay if you're not ready for that yet, but I still worry about you a lot. I just want to make sure you're doing okay."

"Yeah, that's fine. You can stop by whenever." You agreed.

"Thanks" Bucky accepted sadly. Then, what he really wanted to say rolled off his tongue unapologetically. "I really miss you, Bug."

"I miss you too." You agreed, the pain you've become rather familiar but never comfortable with was clawing at your chest again. "A lot, actually. But I don't see a situation in which Steve would be okay with us hanging out again, and I know how important your friendship is with each other and I'd never want to be the one to drive a wedge into that."

"I hope you don't take this as me defending him, because I'm not. I promise I'm not." Bucky started. "But I've known him my whole life, I'd like to think I have a good read of his character, and this is nothing like him. He said some really dumb things to you, but bug? I've never seen him this upset with himself in my entire life."

"I don't think there's anything I can do about that." You shook your head. "He's in your place right now, isn't he?

"Yeah, he is." Bucky told you the truth. "He told me about what happened today, he cried for the first time in a few years because he feels terrible about it and how he made you feel."

You swallowed thickly. "That's not an apology for his behavior."

"It's not, but I'm trying to help you understand each other better. If I can attest to anything, it's that you found out about his crush on you at the worst time imaginable. He loves and cares about you so much, and none of it is ill intended. The reason he kept it in for so long was because he was scared of exactly this situation happening, and he's mortified that he broke your friendship and trust in him. Yes, he's been avoiding talking about it because he was hurt by what we did, but now I think he understands and he's avoiding it because he thinks you hate him."

"I don't hate him" You denied. "I'm mad at the way he's handling this, but I don't hate him."

"I know" Bucky nodded.

"He was really angry when I got to training." You told Bucky. "I've never been scared of him before, but I was terrified of him today. I don't know what he was mad about, but I think it was because I was late. I was only late because Harvey was being an asshole, but Steve told me pointedly that he didn't care."

"He was mad at himself, and it was making him grumpy. He's been like this for a week now."

"I don't know how to move past the way he made me feel earlier. It's like I'm scared to see him again because I'm scared that he's still going to scare me." You explained. "It was like there was no traces of my friend left in there, it felt like he was Captain America, and I was the enemy, and there was no mercy for whatever I did to make him mad."

Bucky sighed because he's seen Steve that angry before, and he knew how scary he really can get. He's a tall, muscular guy, and you're barely five-foot-something with far less fighting experience.

"He would never hurt you" Bucky reminded you. "He knows he scared you, and he's having a breakdown because of it."

"He did hurt me, Buck. In more ways than one." You reminded him. "I love him, I really do, but I'm not responsible for his reaction to the way he hurt me. He scared me, he berated me, and he broke my heart but that's his own doing, and he has to deal with the consequences of that just how I have to deal with the consequences of what happened between you and I and how that made Steve feel."

"I get it." He agreed.

"I'm glad that you two seem to be on okay terms, but you understand how that's bullshit, right?"

"Yeah." Bucky practically whispered.

"Well, for what it's worth I'm sorry you're in the position of being stuck in the middle." You apologized. "I love you, I forgive you for telling Steve because I understand why you did it, and I'll always be here for you if you need me, but I also know I can't be the priority."

"Bug, that's not-"

"It's fine, I get it." You saved him from his own lie. "If he's already struggling, are you going to tell him about my shoulder?"

"I don't know." Bucky sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "Should I?"

You shrugged with your one good arm. "You know him better than I ever will."

"Do you want to talk to him?" Bucky asked already knowing the answer, but he had to give it a shot.

"Not tonight." You denied. "If he wants to talk about it he can come to me, but right now I'm a little high on crazy pills and pain killers so I'd rather wait until I have more time to get into my right mind."

"I understand."

"Thanks for listening, it was really nice seeing you again." You said sincerely.

"Thank you for trusting me. Can I give you a hug?" He asked knowing you needed one desperately.

You nodded and opened your good arm for him, he hugged you gently to avoid hurting you, but it was still healing in a way you haven't felt in a while.

"Don't be a stranger, okay? We can talk more about it whenever you need to in order to make it better. I love you bug, I still want to be your friend and I know we can make it work."

"I appreciate it." You nodded.

"Do you need help getting back to your apartment? I can walk you home."

"I'll be okay." You reassured him. "Have a good night, I'll see you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow."

Tomorrow came around, and Bucky did eventually come check on you. He found you in bed around 4pm fast asleep with a romcom playing quietly in the background. It made him

Sad to wake you up, but he did it anyways just to make sure you were okay and that you didn't need anything, and once he was convinced that you were okay he left you alone.

Then, that was the last anyone had seen you for 4 whole days. Was it your intention to stay in your apartment for that long? No. But things happen, mental health quickly spirals, and your body felt sick. It was like there was an external force locking you in the walls of your home, and imaginary restraints tying you to your bed.

You were scared to leave because you didn't want to get attacked again, scared to report to work because you didn't want to see Harvey or Steve again, and you were scared to move because you were so tired of being in pain. So yeah, your apartment became your little safe space, but you never realized you were the point of concern around the building.

Especially not so much that you woke up once more, but this time Steve was sitting on the edge of your bed looking absolutely terrified as he gently shook your arm.

"Hey, are you okay?" Steve asked the second your eyes opened, eyebrows pinching together in concern.

You grumbled something he couldn't understand before turning away and covering your entire head with a blanket.

"Wait, stop, I'm not joking. Are you okay?" Steve asked, this time you could hear the genuine worry in his voice.

"Why are you here?" You asked with an adorable glare as your head popped out of the blanket. “What part of leaving me the hell alone do you not understand?”

He hated that it almost made him smile. "No one has seen or heard from you in 4 days. We got so many concerned reports of your disappearance that they made me to a mandated wellness check."

"Obviously I'm well, you can go now." You wrapped yourself tighter in the blankets and turned away from him again.

"You're not obviously well. It's 2pm and you're in bed, you haven't answered anyone's texts or phone calls, and you were supposed to report to Fury today to see if you were okay enough to get back to work. Everyone is worried."

"I'm fine."

"You're watching pride and prejudice." Steve noted simply. "You're not fine."

"Tell Fury I'll report to him in an hour."

"Fury is gone for a while, I think he's out until the end of the month." Steve explained.

"Commander Bennett, then."

"Out of jurisdiction" he reminded you. "That's why Fury sent me."

"Then who can I talk to in an hour?"

"Me." Steve sighed, knowing that's not what you wanted to hear.

"Do you have a meeting spot available in an hour?"

"No, my schedule is full for the rest of the day."

"Tomorrow?"

"Dude, I'm here right now. What's wrong?" Steve asked, his heart pounding and cracking in his chest.

"What time you you have available tomorrow?"

"8am." Steve said simply.

"Fine. I'll take it." You agreed, closing you eyes and trying your best to pretend like this wasn't happening.

"I'm not allowed to leave until I'm convinced you're okay." Steve noted. "Are you sure you don't want to push the meeting up to right now?"

"Positive." You grumbled. "Sometimes when heavy conversations are sprung on someone with no time to prepare for them, it leads to overly emotional responses. Ever heard of something like that happening before, Rogers?"

"Maybe once or twice." He made the active choice to not bite at the argumentative bait you threw him. "How's your shoulder?"

"Attached and functioning."

"When was your last full meal?"

Once again, you turned your head to glare at him. "If I answer these stupid questions does that mean you'll get out of my apartment and go back to pretending like I don't exist?"

"This is just as uncomfortable for me as it is for you" Steve told you. Really, seeing you look so broken down and worn out made him genuinely sad, but right now you weren't looking for his pity. Quite honestly, he was worried about how you would react to him if he expressed how concerned he really was.

Now with knowing what you knew, Steve was at least smart enough to know that if he reacted to this scenario as a coworker, or a boss, or even a friend, all of his concern would be directed straight to the romantic advancement category of your brain. He knew that he always would and always will care for you regardless of if you rejected his feelings for you or not, but in this situation where that information was taken horribly wrong, the best thing he could do was stay neutral and respect that you didn't want to be part of his life anymore.

You didn't want him to care, you didn't want him to be there, you didn't want to get out of bed, and you didn't even want anyone to notice you were gone for so long.

Yet, somehow on the very flip side of the coin, you were mad at him for not expressing that he was more worried about you than he was letting on, you wanted him to just stay with you and fight for a spot back in your life, you wanted to just get out of your congested apartment and breathe some air that wasn't from the buildings circulation system, you wanted to go on a long run and feel the cold morning air, and you wanted the same people who reported you as missing in action to care enough about your existence to actually be nice to you beyond a mandated report.

But really, you just couldn't get yourself to do anything.

Leaving was overwhelming, staying made you want to cry, and there was no solution in between those two options.

"Hey, did I lose you?" Steve asked.

"No. Sorry." You shook your head.

"When was the last time you ate?" He repeated.

"Dinner last night." You grumbled. "I would've lied and said I ate lunch today, but your bullshit detector is almost unfair and I think anything but the truth would make you even more worried."

"At least you're honest." Steve sighed. "Last time you drank?"

"This morning"

"Water?"

"Coffee."

Steve frowned. "Last time you left your apartment?"

"I saw Bucky after I got released from medical, whenever that day was."

"Last time you went outside? Had fun? Hung out with a friend? Anything?"

"I played The Sims 4 yesterday, it was riveting." You said dryly.

"Any future plans you're looking forward to? Something? Anything? Literally just give me anything to work with."

"Ooh!" You perked up. "There's a new sim's expansion pack coming out next week it costs $40 but it's okay because if you break down the cost per hour you play it, it really is cents to a dollar."

"Oh my gosh" Steve sighed, running his hand through his hair and tugging at the ends a big trying to relive the stress you had caused him. "I can't in good conscience say you passed a wellness check."

"I'm trying my best dude, this is all I got. I don't know what else you want from me." You huffed.

You watched Steve's eyebrows furrow in concern as he checked his wrist watch for the time. "Okay, here's the deal."

"If this ends with me in grippy socks and a gown I'm going to be so undeniably pissed off at you."

"You're already undeniably pissed off at me so that's not very threatening, but, no I don't think you need that at this very moment." Steve corrected you. "I have 45 minutes until I have to get to a meeting. If you can pull yourself together and leave your apartment to go get food and do something fun, then check back in with me in a few hours, I'll mark you as well."

"That sounds like a lot of money and effort." You complained.

Steve sighed and pulled his wallet out of the pocket of his nice jeans, then handed you a card between his two fingers. "Take the company card, I'll mark the charges as a business expense."

Only then did your face light up, and you happily grabbed the heavy silver card from his hand. "I think I can work with this."

"The rules are that I need cold hard proof you ate and did at least one activity that'll make you feel better, I don't care what that is. And I need the card back by the end of the day, no ifs ands or buts."

"Deal."

"Okay great, you have 44 minutes now to get out of the building." Steve reminded you.

"Are you really going to stay until I leave?" You questioned, tone full of annoyance and dread.

"Yeah, that's part of the deal."

"Ugh, fine." You ripped the blankets off of yourself. "Can you at least go into the living room so I can shower and change in peace?"

"As you wish" Steve stood up and raised his hands in defense. "But don't make me late, you know I hate being late."

"How could I ever forget?" You rolled your eyes.

More bait that Steve refused to bite, so he quietly walked out of your room and softly closed the door behind him. Sitting on the couch and waiting, half an hour later you flew through your bedroom door and didn't miss a single beat as you flew through the living room and grabbed your purse off the rack.

"Come on, Captain, i'd hate it if you were late under any circumstance!" You said sarcastically, pulling open the front door as he shot up off the couch. "Even if it was completely out of your control!"

"I'm choosing to not respond to that" Steve grumbled, following you out and down the hall with confidence your door would automatically lock as it slammed shut behind the two of you.

Calling the elevator did nothing to slow either of you down as the doors automatically opened, and you shoved yourself into the furthest corner you could, trying your hardest to ignore your racing heart and internal panic over being forced out of the compound. He could read the anxiety on your facial expressions, and feel it radiating off of you as if you were telepathically sending it to him.

You hit the lobby button, Steve hit the floor his office was on.

Since his floor was above the lobby, the doors opened once more and it was his turn to get off. "Have fun, be safe, give me the card back today."

"Wait? When was I supposed to give it back to you?" You made one last sarcastic jab before the doors closed, completely shielding you from his annoyed face.

As per his request, you got food, spent more than a few hours and a few hundred at a beauty salon, made a quick stop home before Steve texted you that he was out of his last meeting.

So you made a leisurely walk over to his office, and knocked twice before entering. He looked tired and more than ready to turn in work for the day as he straightened out the haphazard papers and various sticky notes on his desk.

"That pothos is looking a bit sad." You noted, leaning in the doorway.

The once happy plant with bright green leaves with tiny cream colored patches was now droopy and under watered.

"It's not sad, it's just dramatic when it needs some water. I watered it a few minutes ago, it'll perk up again soon" He explained, looking at the plant, then up to you. "Oh, you got your hair done."

Your hair was now perfectly styled, cut a little shorter, and was a little lighter throughout the ends. Steve also noticed your casual street ware was replaced with your favorite sweatpants and a cropped t shirt. He once again cursed himself for thinking about how beautiful you were when he really should've still been mad at you.

"And my nails, and my eyebrows." You noted, holding up your hands for him to see. "Is this enough evidence?"

"I guess it is." He nodded. "What did you get to eat?"

"Dim sum" you admitted. "Here's the card."

It wasn't the cheapest option in the world, but every few weeks you and Steve would happily splurge and go get dim sum together because it was just so good. But hey, if you had the company card, you we're definitely going to fill your belly up with bao and dumplings.

"Thanks." He took it back from you. "Do you feel any better?"

"Yeah, maybe a little bit." You nodded. "But I am going to continue on with that meeting in the morning, oh, and definitely finish pride and prejudice."

"Would you like to have the meeting now? I'll stay late, I don't mind." He asked. Staying late was the last thing he wanted to do, but nothing would be worse than living with the anxiety that this unknown meeting was causing him.

"No it's fine, you seem tired." You denied. "And by the way, did you know the company card works on The Sims 4?! Now I'm even more excited for that new expansion pack because I didn't have to pay for it!"

He could tell you were still deeply sad and exhausted by your surroundings, but your fake enthusiasm wasn't helping him feel any less concerned by your state of being.

"Lovely. I'm happy for you." Steve said dryly.

"See you in the morning, Captain Rogers. 8 am, don't be late."

And just like that, you slipped past his office door. Steve wished it was physically possible to kick himself in that moment. He so desperately wanted to just talk to you, he wanted to explain himself, express to you that he loved and cared for you regardless of where the two of you stood, he wanted to be a good friend and be there for you through this very obvious rough patch, but he couldn't.

The words never properly formulated whenever he was within eyeshot of you, yet the second you left and when he would lay awake at night staring up at the dark ceiling unable to sleep, those words formed perfectly and passionately with no way to express them in a way you deserved to hear.

Just like always, he laid awake all night just for 8 am to come around. Promptly on time, you were back in his office.

As you took a seat in the very familiar chair across his desk, he noticed three things. The first being that you weren't in uniform, the second being that even though you looked beautiful, you no longer looked like yourself, and last but not least, the words escaped him again.

The concealer under your eyes did little to hide the fact that you had been crying, the blush on your cheeks didn't fool him into believing that the life hadn't been drained from your face. Your eyes were dull, your sweet and spunky personality that he loved so much had been missing for a month now. You were right in front of him, but you felt like a ghost and he found himself missing you.

"You're on time" Steve noted. "I stopped for a coffee this morning and grabbed you one too since you're the first meeting of my day."

Steve placed the perfectly ordered vanilla cold brew in front of you, "oh, thanks. I appreciate that."

"Will you please tell me what's going on now?" Steve practically begged. This very meeting had been looming over his head in a storm cloud of anxiety since yesterday.

Without saying anything, you handed him a piece of paper. He took it from your shaky hands with a dreadful look in his eye, so you sat and sipped your coffee and looked at the swirls in the wood of his beautifully stained desk while awaiting his reaction.

The first and only thing his eye picked up before he refused to read more was 'This letter is intended to notify you of my resignation in two weeks from S.H.I.E.L.D.'

"No." Steve said sternly before sliding your resignation letter right back to you.

"No?" You questioned.

"Absolutely not."

"I'm quitting and you're saying...no?" You cocked your head to the side, trying not to cry out of immediate frustration. "You understand that's probably illegal?"

"When have I ever been one to follow the law?" He asked rhetorically. "I can't let you throw everything you've worked so hard for away just because of me. Nuh-uh. Not going to happen."

"This has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with me." You corrected him.

"Why do you think this is the best choice for you right now?" Steve poked, trying his hardest to ignore the way his heart was sitting in the bottom of his stomach.

You braced yourself with a big breath, and accepted the presence of the never ending tears that always stung your eyes nowadays. "Being here has proven to be the worst experience for my mental health, and I need it to get better because I'm scared of what will happen to me if it doesn't."

"There are other things we can try before taking a step this drastic." Steve pleaded.

You shook your head in denial. "I can't get out of bed anymore."

"I'll get you a therapist."

"I've barely been able to eat, shower, work out." You continued painting the picture for him while quickly wiping away a tear. "This is the furthest I've ever been from myself. I look in the mirror and don't recognize my reflection, all i want to do is sleep so I don't have to deal with the constant state of anxiety I'm in just to wake up and hate that I feel numb. I've lost control over my own emotions and I can't take it anymore. We all saw this coming, Steve, so please just let me go."

"Harvey is literally one write up away from getting fire-"

"Four months ago, it had been 3 years since the last time I cried. Now I think I cry about three times a day, and sometimes I need to cry but nothing happens. It's like I'm losing my mind and I hate it."

"But..."

"I never took a day off or called out since I started shield until that one mission when Harvey made sure I got hurt. Ever since then I've been getting hurt more, working less, having to take days off left and right. At this rate, I'd rather go quietly before I get fired."

"Nobody is going to fire you." Steve denied.

"Even before everything happened, I haven't been happy here. My friends and my boyfriend were the only ones keeping me sane and tying me down to the compound, but now? I don't have a boyfriend or even friends for that matter. Everyone here hates me. Nothing is grounding me."

"Do you have another job lined up?" Steve sank in his chair.

"I'll figure it out."

"You know quitting means you'd lose your housing?" Steve challenged. "Do you have another living situation lined up?"

"Yeah, I have two places and two sets of people waiting for me."

You were being cryptic, but Steve knew you were talking about your Sister and Brother in-Law, and your Mom and Dad.

"But you haven't signed a lease yet?"

"No, not yet." You sniffled.

There was a break in conversation, Steve's wheels obviously moving and cranking desperately trying to come up with a solution. So you sat and dissociated from the situation while talking small and slow sips of your coffee.

"Okay, since I legally can't say no to you right now, here's what we're going to do." Steve sat up, and rolled his chair closer into the desk. "I'm putting you on a two week paid leave of absence instead. Take the two weeks to get out of the compound, stay with whoever is waiting for you and really focus on yourself. Really think about what you want, then at the end of the two weeks if you still think that you don't want to do this anymore, that's fine. I'll terminate your employment on the spot, no need for another notice."

"Okay" You accepted. Not only was it a good deal, but it got you out of the compound as soon as today, and all you wanted to do was run out of the doors and never come back.

He started typing around on his computer, and a piece of paper came out of the printer that jumped on. "In the meantime I also really want you to consider this." You grabbed the warm paper from his hands, and looked it over to see that it was the benefits list to the Avengers position. "You'd move up into the loft with the rest of us, you'd never have to see any of the other agents again if you didn't want to. The job is easier- not as busy with more downtime. Everyone loves you and wants you there, plus it would be an increase in pay with better benefits and a killer 401k."

"Everyone?" You asked, "I can think of two people that probably wouldn't want me there right now."

He gave you a disappointed dad stare. "Everyone, and I mean that."

"Much to think about." You mumbled.

"Since you'll be gone and out of harms way, I'm going to take the time to whip the boys into shape since they can't retaliate against you." He noted.

"Good luck with that."

"Questions, comments, concerns?"

"No questions, no more comments, and no less than a million concerns but that's just an average day for me." You stood up from his desk. "Thanks for your time and effort, I'll be back in two weeks I guess."

"Hey, I'm rooting for you, and I genuinely mean that." Steve reminded you sadly. "If you need anything at all, professionally or personally, I'm here. I always will be."

You nodded before pushing through the doors with your coffee and benefits list in hand. As quickly as you could, you packed a bag full of everything you'd need to be gone for a little while in hopes that you could get out of the building before the news spread. The last thing you wanted was Bucky trying to convince you to stay or Harvey getting some sort of sick satisfaction from your choice.

It took about an hour, but walking through the compound with a backpack and a duffel was the most satisfying and enjoyable experience you've ever had since the first time you walked into the building.

Getting into the car and turning the key in the ignition, you let the air from the vents hit your face and dry out the tears on your cheeks. Your seatbelt clicked in place and held you like a hug while the music from your playlist connected to Bluetooth and sang comforting words to you.

After putting in the address to your parents house in maps and set off on your journey, you had an hour and 45 minute drive ahead of you to relax and let the weight of the world roll off your shoulders.

But in the process of setting off on your journey, nothing was more comforting that seeing the reflection of the compound becoming smaller and smaller in the rear view mirrors.

Much like the gravity of all the issues that lived within the cold, gray building, they became smaller and smaller the further you got.

You let all of your problems stay locked in the concrete walls for Steve, Bucky, and Harvey to deal with on their own. Because right now, you needed to get better, you needed to feel like you again.

By the time you pulled into your parent's driveway, you barely had time to open your car door before your dad was grabbing your bags from the back seat while your mom was waiting for a hug.

You hopped out of the car and happily wrapped your arms around her. Before you knew it, there were little arms around your legs, your dad joined in, then two more sets of arms held you close.

"Wha-" You mumbled, lifting your head to see your sister, her husband and your nephew were here as well. "What are you guys doing here?!"

"We made the drive over so we can spend a few days together as a whole family." Jane explained with a kind, sympathetic smile on her face. "Luca lives in a constant state of missing his Auntie Smalls, and we all miss having you around so we thought this would be a perfect opportunity to get some quality time in."

"We know you're having a hard time, sweetheart." Your Mom pet your hair lovingly. "But we're here to rally around you no matter what, okay?"

"Whether you choose to be an agent, or an avenger, or a barista at the coffee shop around the corner, we're going to love you and support you just the same." Your dad reminded you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. "There's plenty of space here for you, we're happy to have you as long as you need. There's no rush."

“And when they inevitably start to drive you absolutely insane, our house is your house too. You know we would love to have you, as would Luca." Nathan, your brother in law told you.

"We're going to have so much fun! Mommy brought puzzles, and paints, and ooh! We can play Nintendo-" Luca started excitedly.

"Woah there buddy, let's let Auntie at least put her stuff down before we start bombarding her, alright?" Jane giggled.

"Fine... Auntie let's go inside!" Luca grabbed your hand and gently pulled you towards the door of your childhood home.

You looked back with a genuine smile on your face. Tears filled your eyes at the sight of your family in the driveway, but this time they were happy tears, something you were completely unfamiliar with.

"Thank you, I love you guys." You put your free hand over your heart as Luca continued to happily walk you in.

"We love you too." Your mom said, finding comfort next to your dad who was lovingly wrapping his arm around her.

He was happy and content to have his kids and grandkid all under the same roof. Nothing made him happier than his empty nest becoming full again. "We love you more."

Next Part: Little Birdie

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