#bad going ‘people can be not okay and not know it because their perception is warped. anyways tina I’m torturing myself and can’t tell - | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

writtenbymoonflower · 3 months

Note

Hello, author-san! How are you? Could I please request some angst for the poly!marauders, where R is someone full of tattoos or piercings but is smart, a sweetheart, golden retriever coded, and Lily is their friend. Lily knows about their infatuation with the boys. Being a great friend, Lily wants to set them up, but they're a bit uncertain about R because of their tattoos. Then one night, R overhears them talking in the common room with Lily and voices out their opinions regarding R, causing R to become insecure and try to hide it. You can continue however you like! Angst with a happy ending if it's okay! 🥺

Thank you, author-san!

💀🌻

Thanks for requesting sweetheart! Sorry it took so long, hope this is okay! gn!reader x poly!marauders, pre-relationship

cw: prejudice associated with tattoos and piercings, swearing, angst to happy ending

1.8k words (oopsie)

It was like you could hear their words on repeat as you raced up the stairs. What hurt the most is that you knew that some people would judge, but you hadn’t expected it from them.

“I just don’t know about 'em, Lils.” James winced. “Like they seem nice, but you know about people who choose to look at that…” He trailed off.

“I’m sure they’re not all bad.” Sirius cut in, clearly uncomfortable with the conversation. “But Prongs does have a point.”

“It’s just the impulsivity of it all.” Remus reasoned. “Like if you’re making rash choices like that, what else would you do.”

That was when you left your hiding spot in the stairs and ran back to your dorm. You could hear Lily’s ‘I’m so fucking done with you being stupid’ voice as you trailed away, making you smile at the knowledge that you had such a good friend.

But you had heard enough. They had clearly made their minds up about you. Besides, you knew your appearance was an… acquired taste, to say the least, and you couldn’t expect them to be with someone they weren’t attracted to. You didn’t think you looked that odd, but maybe your perception was skewed. No matter whose perception was more accurate, they clearly didn’t particularly like you, and it was probably best to keep your distance for now, at least until they really got to know you.

You knew that your appearance didn’t really match your personality. People often assumed you were rude, a slacker, confrontational, or even hateful. But the opposite was true in fact. You always made good marks, you were friends with loads of people, always trying to be as open as possible. And yeah, some people were intimidated at first, but they usually warmed up very quickly.

Apparently those three, the three you wanted the approval of the most, had not been as warm about you as you thought.

You crawled into bed and curled into yourself, trying to get a few hours of sleep before breakfast.

James yawned loudly, blinking his eyes rapidly to get rid of the sleepy, fuzzy film coating them. Him and his boyfriends had been up all night, getting lectured literally until the sun came up.

He had to admit, it was for the best. All three boys had gone to bed, feeling thoroughly corrected. Even slipping into shame.

“What the hell is wrong with you three?” Lily whisper-yelled. “James, you are the LAST person to say anything about appearances. Remember when I had to go around convincing people you hadn’t become mean after your growth spurt in fourth year? Just because you were big and scary and you hadn’t realized how you were coming across?” She scolded, before turning her head to the mouse-haired boy sitting by the fire. “And you,” She seethed. “You have no clue if her choices were ‘rash’ or not. I’ve heard plenty of rumors about your appearance, people saying similar things about you. About your ‘aggression’ just because they don’t know what’s going on with you.” She snapped her head over to Sirius, her fiery hair flipping around from the movement. “And Sirius, you’re just overcompensating because you’re jealous! You’re not fooling anyone, you would look like that in an instant if you could. You’re just too scared to do it.”

Sirius played with his thumbs, not able to dispute the accusations. None of the boys could actually. Lily could tell, she was satisfied with her work.

“I love you three buggers,” She pressed a friendly kiss to each of their cheeks as she stormed upstairs. “You just need to stop being such idiots.”

Sirius didn’t think anyone could change personalities that fast, but it seemed all three boys had woken up different people. That morning they had all just nodded to each other, acknowledging that their opinions were very different than they had been 24 hours ago and all walked shamefacedly down to breakfast. Sirius kept pushing his eggs around his plate, too busy staring at you to take a bite. You looked a lot different today. Your hair was ruffled in front of your face, hiding the metal glinting on your nose and eyebrow. You also had long sleeves and pants on, covering the ink detailing your skin. You still hadn’t waved at them, or even acknowledged the boys’ existence. Usually, you would be bouncing over to them, talking about the weather or whatever was on your mind at the moment. Sirius missed it if he was honest with himself. He was disappointed, he had been excited to show you his outfit. He crafted it with you in mind, teasing his hair up extra and being a bit more outlandish with his top, even stealing Marlene’s varnish to paint his nails.

Remus missed your interest in the latest book he had read. You always had so many interesting questions and you listened so intently. He missed how you played with the hoop in your septum as you nodded along to his plot summaries. You were always so patient and careful, it made his heart crack.

James was equally distraught. He had always prided himself on being open and friends with everyone, and he had considered you his friend, which just made him feel worse. He knew that stereotyping people never led to anything good, especially when someone's personality was completely ignored and replaced with caricature. Yes, you did look intimidating, but he actually liked it. It accentuated how soft your personality actually was. You were like a big dog that everyone was terrified of, but in reality was scared of butterflies and just wanted to love everyone. He laughed sadly, catching the other two boys' attention as he stared longingly at you. All he wanted to do was go over there, but you were completely ignoring them, so he figured it was best to just not bother you and continue on with his breakfast.

You were being equally as forlorn, continually sneaking glances over at the boys. They looked quiet and tired, but no less handsome. You felt sick, moving to leave your breakfast and all but run to the library. You needed to study anyway, you had become so infatuated that you were ignoring your classes. You had barely made it down the corridor before you heard three sets of panicked footsteps, quickly catching up to you. You tried to walk faster, but unfortunately Remus had very long legs and he briskly made it in front of you, trapping you in. He was looking flushed, amber eyes focusing on you way too much for comfort.

“Y/N,” He sounded out of breath. You fixed your face down and back, away from their gaze. You stopping had allowed the other two the opportunity to catch up, and soon you were face-to-face with all three of the people who apparently disliked you, but to your dismay, you were still completely attached to.

“You guys okay?” You asked, as kindly as ever but far quieter than they were used to.

“We’re fine, lovely.” James said, confused. “Are you okay?”

“I’m good.” You muttered, shifting your feet.

“Babe,” Sirius scoffed. Your heart jumped at the honorific, but you quickly scolded yourself. Sirius just called everyone that. You had heard what he, what all three of them had said last night. “You ran from there like bat outta’ hell.” He said like you were being ridiculous.

“And you haven’t spoken to us all day.” Remus cut in before you could respond.

“It’s only seven.” You mumbled.

“Still odd.” James quipped, moving ever so slightly closer to you. “You’re not okay.” He said, with enough finality that you gave up the act all together. They really weren’t going to make this easy on you. They said all those things last night, but they were still going to put you through the misery of having to listen to them say all those things directly to you.

You sighed dejectedly, starting to pick your nails. “Look okay,” You tore the words from the back of your throat. “I know that you don’t like me or don’t think I’m nice or whatever. You don’t have to talk to me, it’s okay.” You did your best to give them a reassuring smile, even managing for water to stay out of your eyes, but their expressions didn’t make it easy. Sirius cursed and pinched the bridge of his nose, James looked like a kicked puppy, and Remus was hiding his eyes from you. You started to walk away, but you were blocked in.

“Shit, you heard last night?” Sirius winced. You nodded painfully, looking back down at your shoes. The silent tension was so thick you felt it suffocating you. James was the first to do anything, wordlessly striding over to pull you into a bone-crushing hug. You stumbled from the shock, easing into him accidentally, but you made no moves to tense away. You limply wrapped your arms around his waist.

“I’m so sorry, angel.” He said, panicked. “I was so stupid, I- I never should’ve said it I don’t know what I was even thinking.” He pulled you tighter to him, enough that you were worried of your feet leaving the ground.

“I’m sorry too.” Sirius said, much more morosely than usual. “Never should’ve said those things, and you never should've heard it either.”

“We’re all sorry.” Remus said firmly. “We all know better, we should’ve known not to think that way. It’s awfully closed-minded. You’re our friend, we should’ve acted like it.”

“It’s okay.” You squeezed out.

“No.” Sirius said sharply. “It’s not okay. I don’t know if you heard what Lily said back, but she pointed out a lot of things, and I can promise that we don’t think that way anymore.”

“Please, please forgive us, baby. We were so wrong. You’re so kind and smart and funny and gorgeous an-” James was rambling on and on.

“Jamie, it’s okay. I know you’re sorry.” You giggled at his panicked tone. “Can you uh- you’re kinda crushing me.”

“Shit! Sorry.” He released you quickly, but not before slicking your hair out of your face. You just laughed, feeling ten times lighter.

“We’re okay.” You reassured. “I forgive you all, it hurt, but it seems like you are all beating yourselves up enough.”

“Jus’ feel bad.” Remus grabbed you unexpectedly, tugging you into his arms. He wasn’t squeezing you like James, but rather greedily absorbing your touch. This felt like a big deal, you almost never saw Remus hold anyone.

“Don’t feel bad.” You pleaded. “Everything’s fine now.” You rubbed his back in a way you hoped was soothing. You felt him relax in your arms.

“Okay stop hogging them.” Sirius tugged Remus out of the way, making him grunt in dissatisfaction. (You pretended to not notice the sneaky kiss Sirius pressed to the taller boy’s knuckles.) “It’s my turn.” He grabbed you with loving aggression.

“I wasn’t hogging.” Remus quipped.

“Yeah, you were.” Sirius sassed. “Besides, I was the biggest idiot. I need to give the biggest cwtch.” His reasoning was flawed, but you settled into him nonetheless.

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ma1dita · 3 months

Text

said he likes crazy

a ‘partners in crime’ installment - luke castellan x dionysus!reader

words: 2.1k

summary: (pre-established relationship) The one where only he can help you with a bad day, even if he's been avoiding you since your first kiss. Luke Castellan x fem!Dionysus!reader

a/n: SAID HE LIKES CRAZY GIRLS, BUT HE HATES WHEN I ACT CRAZY guys i didnt sleep for this pls tell me its ok

(posted 1/29/24, beta’d by the lovely ellie @lixzey )

—

He’s been avoiding you.

To be specific, Luke’s been running away from you. Typical son of Hermes, and a typical teenage boy at that. But if anyone’s asked you what’s up (which, they all have, after almost 4 years of seeing you two not go a day without bickering), it’s just easier to say you’ve been busy.

Okay, so perhaps you’ve been avoiding him too.

Annabeth clocked you as soon as you turned tail after almost bumping into him after archery practice. Damn children of Athena; it’d be nice if they weren’t so perceptive sometimes.

“What did he do this time?” she pipes up, filling the silence of the Big House. It’s late now, and the cabin counselors’ meeting just ended.

“Seeing as you’re the one helping me with the paperwork tonight and not him, you can take a good guess, Annie,” you sigh.

Honestly though, who the fuck kisses someone senseless and then runs away? (Luke Castellan, that’s who.) You weren’t sure what to make of it. You’re a daughter of chaos, after all, not love. But if there’s anyone who can read your emotions better than yourself, it’s him.

Annabeth stares at her idiot brother through the window as he wanders in the grass outside the Big House.

“That bad, huh?”

“He’s just…being Luke,” you say, blinking slowly as you shuffle through the last of the files you need to put on your dad’s desk before you mutter, “I’m just having a bad day.”

A noise of concern makes its way up Annabeth’s throat. You haven’t had a bad day in a while, in all honesty, not one that makes you act like this, admittedly not one that makes you act like you— the daughter of Dionysus, god of insanity, and not the daughter of Mr. D, camp director.

It was just a bad day until it turned into a bad week, and the voices in your head were starting to get loud without Luke distracting you. Because that’s what he ultimately is, a distraction from your camp duties.

There’s so much to do and so little time, however, that you hide away your microexpressions that seem to be clawing at you from the inside. The anger, the mania, the hurt. If you unleash it, only the gods can predict how much of camp would be affected by your ‘outbursts’, as your dad likes to call them. Not like you had a choice in the matter. Your days of wreaking havoc are behind you, now presenting yourself as the stellar star of the Camp Half-Blood show. It’s almost a one-woman production with you picking up after your father and trying to tame the traits he passed down.

Thanks for that, D.

So you give and you give and you give—all your attention and time and effort into keeping camp upright, into being the perfect daughter, that at the end of the day, you’ve drained yourself of who you are with who you try to be.

You look at your tired reflection in the window, before your eyebrow raises at the sight of Luke blending in with the shadows of the tree he’s leaning against. Idiot.

“Annie, would you mind…”

“Yeah, I’ll do cabin checks myself. Might drag your brother to do them with me,” she smiles, patting your arm before grabbing her bag.

“If he complains, let me know. Pollux has heard me bitch enough today.” The small girl raises an eyebrow at that, biting her tongue from responding. You chewed out a lot of people today, acting extra uptight and demanding of the counselors to “just do the right thing.” It was almost insufferable, but despite you trying to hold it in, your emotions bled into their own. Everyone was agitated by the end of the meeting, filing out quickly with biting words and hot tempers. You couldn’t help but notice Luke led them all out of there, and they also somehow got the feeling that he was to blame.

Smiling at Annabeth in thanks, you watch her walk out to Luke before punching him in the stomach as he grimaces, meeting your violet gaze through the window as he raises a hand. It’s hard to tell if it’s to signal a truce or his embarrassment, but he trudges the way up the path and the door creaks open.

“Heard you were having a bad day,” he mumbles, scratching the nape of his neck. You look at him from the corner of your eye as you continue to write down the weekly to-dos and organize papers for your dad to sign and send back to Zeus.

“Why are you here, Castellan?”

“So we’re back to that? I thought…” his voice trails off at the sound of his last name, not Luke, not angelface, or anything in between, and both of you are unsure how to proceed. Neither of you have done this before, at least not with each other. You tilt your head to the side, daring him to speak, and it reminds him of a week ago, you bathed in sunlight when he leaned in and kissed you. Though if he did that right now, he’s not sure how you’d react.

“It’s just a bad day,” you whisper in defeat, lilac eyes wilting in front of him like an overwatered flower.

He realizes then that he cares for you more than he knows how to. And Luke knows what it means when you’re having a bad day.

There’s a deranged look in your eye, a subtle eye twitch and clench of your jaw that is almost insusceptible to the average demigod, but he knows you’re on edge, having taunted you mercilessly until you scream, cry, laugh, or all of the above. But most of all you look tired and in need of someone who knows how it feels to be underappreciated.

“D’s a great dad to the twins. But I just feel like… maybe he wasn’t meant to be mine,” you whisper, rolling your tongue against the front of your teeth to push back the sob a 14-year-old version of you would let out deep in the dark of cabin 11, having been there for months and knowing Dionysus was your father and waiting for him to see you. To know you.

“Giving me a hard time about all of this,” you say, hands gesturing to the things you have to prepare for him by morning. You’re overworked, underpaid, and definitely not appreciated— and Luke decides he hates your dad for what he puts you through, not just as a shitty camp director but as a shitty dad. He’s learned to live with the hurt—to use it to fuel his vengeance for how he plans to make the world better. But your ambition makes you change yourself constantly to try to be better. Both fatal flaws are fueled by the ignorance of your fathers. He knows the feeling all too well. He knows you.

“What do you need?” he asks simply, stepping closer to your form hunched over the desk.

“I can do it, you know. D’s wrong about me,” you whisper, and the words come out sounding so desperate for him to believe the performance you always put on that you avert your eyes.

He doesn’t need to be convinced; instead, he holds his arms out waiting for you to let you make the next move. Luke is neither a fool nor a knave— there are no tricks here, no hidden agenda as he watches you try to compose yourself with a deep breath instead of showing him the real you. The one who’s beneath the mask of being head counselor, your father’s saving grace, and the one who carries her responsibilities like Atlas carries the weight of the sky.

“I know you can. You always have. You really think I’m here to help you file paperwork?” He means it.

“Will you let me?” Whether he meant sharing the workload or being there for you, you wouldn’t dare to ask. It’s all the same, anyway—laying yourself bare for someone to peek into your mind and have them not laugh at it.

Suddenly you speak, and the intensity of your tone makes him straighten his posture.

“Sometimes… Do you ever feel the need to just…”

“What?” He reaches out to tug your hair, and in the dim light, he can see the bloom of your cheeks. You’re shy, and Luke thinks you look soft like this, wary of how he perceives you.

“I shouldn’t.” Fuck the gods. He can see the thought form in your eyes, the heat of your stare tearing through his, and his lips pull into a smirk.

“What was that, trouble?”

“Luke, don’t be an asshole…” You say warily, biting the inside of your cheek. There’s no way you’re going down in the history books for cursing the gods because Luke Castellan of all people made you.

“I thought you liked me like that,” he’s grinning now, and grabbing your chin lightly, mouthing the words to echo your thoughts.

Fuck the gods.

“Fuck.” you whisper, before your voice fails you, your eyes closing both from his touch and the genuine fear of the heavens falling down from the sacrilege falling from your lips.

“Louder,” he whispers, pulling your face up close to his, “come on, you used to be more fun, trouble. I believe in you.”

“Fuck!” you say louder and he’s whispering in your ear, urging you to toe the line between perfect child and degenerate.

“Say it again.”

“FUCK! FUCK THE…” you yell before you sigh exasperatedly, eyes widening as you feel the breath release from your chest before your head lolls onto his shoulder.

“Gods, you’re fucking insane, Castellan.”

He laughs lowly, and it sounds as sweet as sin. Your smiling lips make an imprint on his collarbone, and he wishes they would sear themselves on there for the rest of eternity.

“Hey, I get it from you. Feel better?”

To be seen is a fickle thing. But to be known is something more intimate, and nothing will be able to erase the connection you both share—fatal flaws and all. There are things you can’t change about people, what they are at their core, and so he takes what you hate about yourself with both hands and pulls you towards his chest until you settle against him with a sniffle. Luke tilts your chin up again, a rough thumb wiping away evidence of your watery smile. He thinks he sees a glimpse of a past you—a younger one that dyed his socks purple to make him feel like he belongs here. And he knows now that he does belong with you, right here as he holds you in the quiet of the Big House.

“Ugh, I’ll kiss you later, I still have to finish up here. You’re not off the hook, angelface.” You sigh, pushing away from him before he tugs you back, your feet stumbling as you roll your eyes at his impish expression.

“Let me make it up to you, trouble.”

“What, so you run away again?” you scoff, snickering at the sight of his ego being taken down a notch.

“I’ve just….I don’t know how to do all of this with you. Guess I’m worried it won’t meet your expectations, Miss Head Counselor.” A boyish sort of bashfulness crosses his features, and he’s twirling a piece of your hair in his hands like spinning silk.

“I just hope you never stop surprising me. That’s all I ask.”

Your hand touches his wrist lightly, and he sighs like you’ve already taken his breath away.

“I keep my promises. Do you?”

“Who said a kiss was a promise? I meant it as a threat,” you laugh before he’s pressing your hips into the table, nose nudging against yours and suddenly work is off the table for the rest of the night.

You on the table, however, well... that could be negotiated.

“I knew something was wrong with me when your so-called threats got less scary and more sexy,” Luke teases, running a finger on the side of your cheek. His breath tickles your lips, and you can imagine the rage your father would feel if he caught the two of you in his office like this. Besides the blatant defiance, you briefly wonder if your rebellion would get him to respect you more. An interesting thought.

“You’re absolutely terrible. I need to get this done… The gods don’t wait for us.”

A weak sigh leaves your mouth as your brain is already riddled with thoughts of him and he closes the gap between your lips.

“They can wait until morning. For now, you’re mine.”

—

“You can’t love someone unless you love yourself first — bullshit.

I have never loved myself.

But you —

Oh god, I loved you so much I forgot what hating myself felt like. (via swxrn-in)”

ask to be added to general/luke taglists!

luke taglist (some won't let me tag, turn on my post notifs?): @kissingyourgrl @dorcas4meadowes @lorarri @andrewgarfldsgf @noodlesketchbook @10ava01 @poppysrin @ashisabitgay @timhalamet @liv1104 @leeknows-wife @mxtokko @bugcuti3 @luvvfromme @midmourn @2hiigh2cry @yuminako @niktwazny303 @lukecastellandefender @intergalactic-padawan @iliketopgun @annybah @dangelnleif @thegrinningghost @alyssajunelle @obxstiles @m00ng4z3r @visndcaitswhore @b0ok-lover @elegant-face-tree @this-barbie-is-having-breakdowns @amortencjja @idonevenknow1359 @maliaaaa @targaryenluvs @sakyira @dhdjdjjdhsjdiri @number-onekidqueen @nininehaaa @bradynoonswife @stevenknightmarc @hoodedhavok @happy-mushrooms @homebyeleven @anotherblackreader @too-deviant @liviessun @lilacspider @theadventuresofanartist @sucker4seresin @simpforsunwoo @zanzie @starrystormwritings

#luke castellan x reader #luke castellan x dionysus!reader #luke castellan fanfic #pjo x reader #pjo imagine #made by ma1dita ♥︎#trouble!verse #percy jackon and the olympians #luke castellan angst #thank you for reading my love ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

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avocado-writing · 3 months

Note

Okay, I've had this idea bouncing around in my head, waiting for you to reopen suggestions, haha. How do you think the Origins Companions + Halsin, Rolan, Dammon, and Zevlor would react if they found out that Tav had been hiding a very serious injury from them? The kind of injury where Tav is convinced that they're fine and they don't want to worry anyone with something they can handle on their own, especially the people they care most for, but as they try to ignore the injury it only gets worse until it's potentially life threatening and they can't keep up the facade anymore. I will leave it up to you whether or not Tav and the other individual are in a romantic relationship. I think both ways have potential for wonderful angst 😆

ooohhh noooooo! but also oh yes, LOVE this sort of angst lol. written as if you have had an infection come on from an injury. this is gonna be a long list so let's buckle up...

Astarion

really tries to hide his panic but fails miserably.

can't help but start snapping - how could you keep something like this from him?

you try to give your excuses but he waves them away, angry, but mostly because he's terrified that he might have lost you.

if he has any healing potions he helps you take them, if he doesn't he immediately... sources some from somewhere.

holds you as tight as he dares, worried that he will aggravate the injury otherwise.

as you begin to heal and drift off to sleep he spends the whole night watching you rest, making sure that you're still breathing, still safe. doesn't mind when you cuddle up to him in the night, sleepily.

Gale

curses himself for not noticing your condition. he's a wizard, damn it! he's meant to be bloody perceptive.

wishes for the first time ever that he didn't just know wizard spells. wishes he knew how to heal, too.

makes you as comfortable as he can while he finds a book about what he can do for an infected wound, probably swallowing his pride and going to Shadowheart if it's bad enough.

you manage a weak, "Gale, you don't have to--", and he cuts you off, "if you're going to insist that I don't have to look after you, I'm telling you that I do."

fixes you something to help with the pain and infection, makes sure you drink it all despite the horrid taste, then tucks you into his bedroll to let you rest.

when you go to reach out and cuddle him he slips into your arms, presses his lips to your hair, and whispers as you fall asleep about how much you scared him. about how he'd never be able to lose you.

Lae'zel

only realises how unwell you are when you fall over mid-journey.

"tsk'va! why did you hide the extent of your injuries from me?"

hauls you onto her back and carries you back to camp, muttering about your foolishness the whole time.

makes you comfortable in her tent and uses her knowledge of githyanki medicine to help start healing you.

it isn't comfortable as she works on your infection but for the first time you feel her hands being soft rather than vicious.

"you should not have kept this from me." "I know. I'm sorry." "hm. ridiculous thing. zhak vo'n'fynh duj."

goes and intimidates the camp into being quiet so you can rest. it works. this is the nicest she's ever been to you. you could get used to it.

Shadowheart

obviously this is not a huge problem for her, but she is still worried that it got so far without her noticing.

immediately heals you, pouring far too many spell slots into your body in order to get it up and running again.

it helps, immediately breaking the fever you've been nursing, and the touch of Shadowheart's hand to your face is cooling and reassuring.

"lady shar teaches us to embrace our pain... but not like this. you should have known better. you could have died."

her hand slips down to cup your cheek, you cover it with one of your own. she's telling you off but you can tell it's because she cares.

"I'm sorry that I scared you." "I know. don't do it again."

she smiles and the ache in your heart is lifted, too.

Wyll

panics.

you collapse on day in camp and he immediately calls on the others for help, not so proud as to be unable to admit when something is out of his knowledge. he is not a healer. he needs help.

he manages to catch you in his arms as you tumble, hugging you close to his chest while magic is worked or a healer checks you over.

lets out a breath he didn't realise he was holding when you begin to stabilise.

helps you back to your tent to rest, gently chiding you but letting you know that he's glad you're alright.

when your hand weakly comes up to touch him, he indulges you in a kiss to let you know how relieved he is.

constantly watching you on the battlefield from that moment on. if he can help it, you'll never be hurt again.

Karlach

another panicker.

scoops you up in her arms and holds you to her chest, running to the tent of the nearest healer in camp - or, if you're in the city, kicking down the door of a local doctor.

begging the healer to check you over, but is reluctant to let you go. if she stops holding you it's like she's relinquishing control and that scares the life out of her.

you're healed and she feels you start to stir in her arms, peppering you with kisses of relief, choking through her tears that you're never to scare her like that again.

carries you back home, even if you're totally capable of walking. she just wants to make sure you're okay.

Halsin

sternly disappointed that you didn't tell him, but more annoyed that he didn't notice something was wrong himself. how could he not see how out of balance with nature you were?

squirrels you away to his tent to heal you, make you soothing and medicinal teas, his big hands over the source of the infection.

you burrow into his touch, into his chest, and you end up sitting in his lap as he heals you.

he wants to tell you off a little, but is more relieved that you're alright. encourages you to share all your burdens with him.

kisses you on the forehead, then on the mouth when he's sure you're strong enough for it not to knock you flat.

Dammon

my poor boy is just a blacksmith, so though he doesn't exactly panic, he does scoop you up and try to find a healer as soon as he can.

waits quietly and nervously as you are examined, silently cursing himself for being too busy to see how you were hurt. he's meant to be better than this. he's meant to love you, how didn't he notice?

when you come to he can't stop apologising, and it takes several of your kisses to soothe him and tell him it was not his fault but yours.

he makes you promise that you'll always tell him when you're hurt. has you look into his eyes and swear it.

he can't do much on the battlefield but he can protect you where he can.

Rolan

another one cursing that he doesn't know healing spells.

"you aren't meant to die, gods damn it! you're meant to be strong... what good am I if I can't keep you safe..."

rushes you to the best doctor in Baldur's Gate. pays for all the treatment that you could need. holds your hand at your bedside for your entire recovery... until you come back to consciousness, of course, at which point he just starts telling you off for being stupid enough to get into his mess in the first place.

you grab him by the collar and drag him down for a kiss. that finally shuts him up. but he never lets you forget how foolish you were.

Zevlor

practical but still worried about you.

you collapse in the field and he finds a safe place to hide the both of you from dangerous eyes, using his Lay on Hands ability to channel his magic into healing.

you try to apologise but a finger to your lips silences you, and all you can do is watch in quiet wonder as he burns the infection out with his Paladin's light.

when you're better he gently chides you. tells you that you have people relying on your leadership, and that a problem shared means there are more heads working on how to fix it.

when he sees how sorry you are lets you cuddle into him. when you say you'll repay him, he insists your happiness and well-being is enough for an old warrior like him.

does take the kiss you offer, though. he's been wanting to do that for a while...

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icanseethefuture333 · 11 months

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PAC: What are your siren powers & qualities? 🧜🏽‍♀️🐚🌊

In these piles there is adult themes so just be wary of some of the content 🤍 Please leave a tip if you can! 😇 $$$

Pile 1:

Shufflemancy -

Lullaby by GWSN

New You by Zolita

How U Want It by Rochelle Jordan

Six of Swords "Knowledge", The Devil, & Nine of Cups "Joy"

What's interesting Pile 1, is that a song by Zolita came on, and she actually practices witchcraft. So you could be into the occult and practice magick or that is the vibes that you give off. You could visit people in their dreams or you have the power to have influence on people's dream, which is insane! You could have Pisce and air placements (Gemini, Libra, & Aquarius). You have a strong hold of people's subconscious and linger in people's minds. I'm getting like restless nights, tired energy, and I feel people stay up because they have racing thoughts about you. You could have a very soft and gentle appearance as well. You give off an air of mystery and it's like "wow I didn't know this girl could have so much power me???". You could have ex partners who wish they could have you back as well. Your eyes are very magnetizing. I feel that you should get into doing glamour magick, mirror magick, and chants or written spells. I feel that you get downloads from the universe, so you have a divine higher power. Also you could speak your desires out into the world and they manifest instantly. I'm getting like a lot of Mercury and Neptune energy. Very imaginative, alluring, and perceptive. (Clarified by Twof Cups "Love") You could also use psychology for seduction (I'm thinking of Robert Greene's books like "48 Laws of Powers" or "The Art of Seduction", so maybe you have read those or should lol). People just can't help but fall for you.

Pile 2:

Shufflemancy -

Mrs. Variety by Leon Thomas, Ft. Tayla Parx

Goodies by Ciara, Ft. Petey Pablo

She Bad by Cardi B, Ft. YG

Strength, Two of Wands "exploration", & Three of Wands "domination"

Okay so this pile is definitely my fire sign (heavy on Aries but also Leo & Sagittarius) pile or my Virgos (Tayla Parx said in the song "Have you ever fucked wit a virgo?"). You guys have a bad bitch mentality and refuse to settle for anything less. Cardi says in the song "I'm a boss in a skirt, I'm a dog, I'm a flirt". So I feel that you like to be a tease when you flirt with people and then leave them looking stupid. You just like to have fun and you know you're not obligated to do anything you don't want to. This could put people in their feelings because it's like "we were just flirting and then they don't even wanna go out with me?". Which honestly, period - you owe nothing to nobody. I'm getting like this coquette energy, where you like to be in male spaces, and you're better at it than them. Whether that's sports, politics, debates, etc. You have a strong dark feminine, masculine energy and it's incredible. I heard "spicy 🔥🌶" so you could even be a hot head and people find that so sexy 😂. You also like to wear red and black. You mainly like to dress in sports wear or a t-shirt and jeans but when you go out you show tf out. "Mrs. Variety" you know how to glam up for the occasion and it puts people in a trance. Some people could even think like "wow I didn't know they had a body like that" or "damn they look fine as hell when they get all fancy". So maybe when you go out to parties, dinners, or dates you could put on a nice suit or dress with heels. (Clarified by Seven of Wands "bravery") You guys are very brave and courageous. That intimidates people but you have a very high standards and you value yourself so keep working towards your goals!

Pile 3:

Shufflemancy -

Who Hurt You? by Daniel Caesar

Haunting by Halsey

Long Nights by 6lack

The Hermit, The Empress, & The Moon

Oh myyyyy 🤭😏 so this could be only for some of the people in this pile but y'all could be ladies/people of the night 😂? I'm getting that you could be an... "accountant" (sw) and if you're not, you would be so successful at it (if you're a minor then this message ain't for y'all, so dont be thinking about being like Kat from Euphoria 💀). For some reason you come off as very sad though or you look like you're sad to some people. You could have dark circles or your eyes tend to look watery/puffy. Some of you could deal with depression as well (I'm sorry baby I know that can be hard to deal with ❤️‍🩹). You could be unhappy with the current position you are in your life and are wishing for change. You could be working at a "dead end job" and you could be saving money, hoping that you can eventually quit one day. You have people who wish they could "save" you from what you're going through in life. I feel like your power could honestly playing into this "damsel in distress" role to get what you want. This pile reminds of Meg fron Hercules when she said "I'm a damsel *grunts*, I'm in distress, I can handle it, have a nice day~". Like even if you're fine and nothing is wrong, they feel they could give you better than what you currently have or got going on. People just have such a strong desire to help you. You are also very beautiful and you could be an introvert perhaps? There could be Cancer, Libra, & earth sign (Heavy Taurus & Capricorn but also Virgo) placements in your birth chart. You like to be alone or do activities that don't require being in social settings. For example, if other people wanted to go to the club, you would rather be at home, work, library, museum, cafe, etc. You don't like to do anything that requires you to force yourself to get out of bed and interact with bed you probably never gonna see again (valid btw 💀). You prefer to be around close friends, family, coworkers, etc. As I was saying earlier though, you have a lot of secret admirers, pile 3 👀. You could look really pretty in the moonlight as well or people want you sexually at night time 😳. You probably the type of person who gets a lot of booty calls or texts and you're like "why me???". It's just you have a connection to the darker side of people and yourself. You provide this healing energy to people and you exude such divine feminine energy, that's very rare to experience in this lifetime. You could be nurturing to your loved ones as well and for people who aren't close to you, they wish they could receive that love as well. You could be creative too and like to either dance, paint, read, write, etc. (Clarified by Ace of Earth (Pentacles).) Now did I not just mention "accountants"?! Lmao 😭 For the people who are working and are in need of some money. You're gonna get a promotion or a new job soon. You have a very seductive body language and aura, I feel like you could use that for some cash ifykwm 👀👀👀 I'm not saying flirt in the workplace but ya know, don't be afraid to wear your hair a certain way, sway your hips, bite your lip, etc 😌 your clientele would much appreciate the "fanservice" 💅🏽

Pile 4:

Shufflemancy -

No Scrubs by TLC

Enough For Love by Kelela

Balenciaga by Princess Nokia (This song came out in 2019 💀)

Three of Cups "abundance", Four of Cups "Comfort", & Seven of Swords "Deception"

This is very interesting and unique. So pile 4, I feel like you don't care for trends but you know how dress down. The song keeps talking about "drip" so you're styling, you naturally have this swag that nobody else. Whether it's your clothes, the way your carry yourself, or your aura - you're just cool as fuck. You know how to budget and you understand that you don't gotta spend a lot of money to look fabulous but when you do, everything just fits you just right. People could think you're (or you are) very wealthy because of this. I'm reminded of that video Cardi B posted when she said some of her pieces were like a hundreds of dollars and ome thing would be like 20-30$ ("Learn how to budget hoe!" Lol). People could even feel like shocked or duped by that too like "oh you're not a millionaire but have this" or "that outfit is that cheap? It looks so good". A lot of people have this misconcept that being rich means you know how to dress and trust me... I've seen a lot of celebrities wear terrible outfits. When it comes to fashion, you are a expert honey. I'm thinking of that song by Migos: "My bitch is bad and boujee". In your dating life, you refuse to date people who don't have a plan, or don't wish to take care of you financially. For example, if you're on a date, and you pay for one date, you'd be okay, but if the other person continously just mooches of you, you'd cut them off with the quickness. So you only date people who are "high value" and can add substance to your life. (Clarified by Six of Swords "Success") You are private when it comes your money, goals, and achievements. I feel that you are like a "humble bragger". You like to work in silence snd let the results show for yourself. If not, you should start learning how to do that. It can protect you from the evil eye 🧿!

Pile 5:

Shufflemancy -

Honey by Riri

Slow Down by Normani & Calvin Harris

You Got Me by The Roots, Ft. Erykah Badu

Seven of Cups "illusion", The Lovers, & Ace of Air (swords)

This pile's energy is reminding me of Sade. I'm getting a very classy, refined, and sensual vibe to you pile 5. Sade could be one of your favorite artists as well or you like to listen to smooth jazz, r&b, soft rock, or any song that's typically more mellow. You could be old fashioned as well and desire a more traditional relationship. You either are in a relationship right now or you dream of finding that special someone and being with them for the rest of your life. I'm hearing the lyrics "will you still love me when I'm no longer young and beautiful" by Lana Del Rey and some of the people that chose this pile could be older in age or they are more mature than others their age. You have a deep soul and it entraps people, an enigma. You could like to take it slow when it comes to love and that makes the people you date drawn to you even more. I'm being reminded of Mariah Carey when she says in her song: "I can't be elusive with you, honey". You are able to communicate clearly to others what your needs are and if they aren't being met, you have no issue with leaving because you know that you deserve better - Whether at work or in your relationships. In your past, you could have experienced a lot of disappointments due to your expectations not being met. I'm also seeing that people have fantasies about being in a relationship with you and see you as a good potential for marriage. (Clarified by The High Priestess) You attract others to you when focusing on your spiritual path. I feel that you are most abundant when you are connected to your higher self and follow what makes you happy. People feel drawn to you when you are the best version of yourself.

Pile 6:

Shufflemancy -

Dreamcatcher by Metro Boomin Ft. Swae Lee

Te Amo by Rihanna

Somewhere I Belong by Linkin Park

The Chariot, Ace of Water, & Death

I feel that this is my queer pile. Some of you might be sapphic/attracted to those of the same sex or you attract others from the same sex. You could be flirtatious when you have the courage (maybe even liquid courage?). You could be very persuasive and charming, it's a turn on for people 😂. If you're not lgbtq+, then I feel like you give very "sus" compliments to others. For example, you ever see girls in another girls' comment sections? You would think that they're gay by the shit they be saying 😭. I feel like you make friends or attract lovers easily because you have such a likeable personality. You're funny, friendly, and supportive so you make people feel good inside. Although, I feel that you guys have trouble with your relationships. When you like someone you get all these butterflies and stutters when you are around someone you really like. So even though you like them you're afraid to tell them how you feel. To make sure that person doesn't know you just act nonchalant and pretend that you're online looking to have fun and nothing serious. "I'm here for a good time not a long time" basically. I'm reminded of Danny from Grease, he was totally smitten for Sandy but he didn't want to let go of his tough guy image for her. Where instead of you having a tough guy image, you use your sense of humor for protection out of your own of fear of rejection or heartbreak. I feel that growing up your interests, sexuality, or personality was different from the rest so it could have made you feel lonely or isolated as well. You wanted to find a place where you belong and so you had to find your own group of people that you can connect with and feel close to. (Clarified by The Sun) I'm seeing partying, dancing, one night stands, make outs, the "Suck and Blow" game, etc. You guys are just wild, pile 6 😂! You change people's lives forever after interacting with you. I'm getting like "drunk girl in the bathroom that's my bestie for the night". You become a "core memory" to people because of your uplifting personality and silly jokes. If people feel down in their lives or really depressed. People suddenly remember the things that you did for them and it cheers them up. You are a beam of light for others in their darkest hours!

Pile 7:

Shufflemancy -

LEFT RIGHT by XG

From Time by Drake

N.E.R.D - Kites

Daughter of Fire, Nine of Cups "Joy", & Two of Cups "Love"

Pile 7, I feel the way you dress has pieces of your culture involved. Your style could be very bohemian as well. I'm seeing tribal tattoos, beads, neck pieces, sarongs, and feathers. You could be very passionate when it comes to what you believe in. You also seem to be proud of your heritage. For some people in this pile, you could be artists. You could be dancers, actors, in theater, do pottery, work with clay, or paint. I see that you are very talented with your hands. Maybe some of you even make jewelry or know how to sew clothes. Your skin could glow in the sun or it's just naturally radiant and beautiful. You could also be kind of cheeky and vivacious 🤭. People find thatt so adorable and endearing. You could like to make people blush or find people's reactions funny when you mess with them. I'm reminded of Joy from Red Velvet. She has this like "I'm hot and I know it" mindset or is well known for being "cutie-sexy" and it's refreshing. You could also be a really good kisser 😚 or you have these plump lips that people wish they could get a kiss from 💋 I'm also seeing licking or biting so you could do this with your lips or to others 🥵 This pile reminds me of the love interests in the movies and it seems that everyone just really likes you, pile 7. You're the Mary Jane to people's Peter Parker/Spiderman. (Clarified by Three of Cups "Abundance") What did I just say?! You have so many people who want to offer you a love proposal or ask you out on a date. I feel that you guys are aware of manifestation and have a positive self concept. You could practice law of the assumption and just affirm/assume that you're highly favored and desired. If you need a confirmation that what you're doing is working - It is, stand in your power ✨️

Pile 8:

Shufflemancy -

Niki - Spell

Stray Kids - Deep End by Felix

Shilpa - Selfish

The Fool, Mother of Air, & Three of Pentacles ("Work")

I feel that in your relationships you have been selfless and devoted. You express your love with acts of service and quality time. Expressions of emotional intimacy could make you uncomfortably possibly (reflect as to why!). You are logical and intelligent. You may enjoy reading and writing. (Clarified by Daughter of Air) Growing up your parents could have been strict and were very traditional. You could have done well academically in classes (the girl in this card has a sword, you could be "cut throat" with your words, some of you could been in debate club?). Your voice commands just attention. I feel as you got older and gained more of your independence. You began to rebel from your parents rules and expectations, discovering who you truly are without other people's influence. NSFW warning but I believe people would love to be degraded by you 👁👁? Some of you could be dominant sexually or be a dominatrix. While also balancing it with this maternal energy? ("Mommy? Sorry- Mommy? Sorry-"). Or your style has elements of fetishwear (harnesses, leather, boots, etc). I feel that people who are involved with you romantically/sexually just become like your litte worker bees while you're the queen. I can also see that you're noncommittal as of right now or just exploring your options. This upsets people greatly because you have a great amount of secret admirers who would love to be your partner. You could get late night calls or text messages from exes and you're just like so over it (which is understandable 😂). Your cold and dismissive attitude just draws people toward you. I'm reminded of Jennie from Blackpink or Heather from Total Drama. They both have dark hair, cat like facial features, and their expressions are just effortlessly cool and confident (you could possibly have these features also). You fit into that "pretty mean girl" trope.

Pile 9:

Shufflemancy -

Qveen Herby - BDE

Retronaut - Talk

Lauren Jauregui - Em(oceans)

Eight of Cups ("Despair"), Strength, & The Emperor

I feel the people in this pile has luscious hair and something about it could be shiny or radiant (some of you have wavy hair or the texture is soft or silky). Your features could look ethereal or possibly be androgynous. You have a balance of feminine and masculine energy. Your nose, cheekbones, and jawline structure could be prominent and defined. I feel that the people in this pile are like a Phoenix, they have suffered in silence, and had to rise from the ashes. You don't let people see you suffer and so you let yourself heal in silence. When people hear your story and learn about what you've been through, they gain so much admiration for you. They'd never suspect to such things happen and therefore it's like they gain respect, while others think you had it easy. People wonder how you got all this success but what they don't understand is that you had to literally come from the mud in order to become this pearl that washed onto shore. You did your part and fought for your power, which I commend you so much for pile 9. You are like this beautiful warrior, you carry so much strength and bravery inside of you. What's also attractive about you is how you set boundaries and change the topic when someone becomes too invasive with your questions. You are stoic and a mountain that can't be moved with just meer charm, if a lover wanted to impress you, they would have to do more than that. (Clarified by Ace of Swords) I feel that the people in this pile could be sapiosexuals. Someone who is passionate about their talents, work, loved ones, etc, is just so sexy to you. Your ideal match would be someone who could let you take the lead in the relationship (pick the restaurants, what location to travel to, etc) but in the bedroom then its their turn 👀.

#pac #pick a card #tarot #tarot readings #free readings #witchcraft #wicca #astrology #spell #spellwork #18+ pac

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wishcamper · 3 months

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Nesta, Interrupted: gendered perceptions of alcoholism in ACOSF

CW: addiction, sexual assault, gendered violence.

Creds: I’m a licensed counselor with a degree specialization in treating addiction. I have career experience with multiple modes of mental health, trauma, and substance use treatment in women-specific carceral, institutional, and healthcare settings. And I know anyone can come on the internet and say that, but I pinky promise.

The short version:

ACOSF stigmatizes alcoholism in line with cultural standards.

Western culture feels differently about female and male alcoholics due to systemic sexism, and thus treats them differently.

Women’s experience of alcoholism is often compounded by or even a result of systemic factors and intersectional identity.

Nesta’s treatment in ACOSF, while repugnant, is in many ways very accurate of attitudes today.

(I’ll be using “women/men” and “male/female” to denote cis afab and amab people. Little research exists on the experiences of queer, nonbinary and gender expansive considerations in addiction and recovery, which is a fuckin’ shame. Studies are also largely conducted with white participants due to enormous barriers to treatment for Black, Indigenous, and people of color, so this convo is inherently incomplete where it neglects those intersections.)

Okay, first things first: ACOSF is a book that stigmatizes alcoholism. I will not be taking questions.

The number one thing to understand is that in America, land of Miss Sarah, we are very bad at addiction treatment (tx). Why? Because our culture hates addicts has as stigma around addiction. And female alcoholics bear a very specific set of stigmas based in their identity.

In Susanna Kaysen’s memoir Girl, Interrupted , Kaysen’s character is institutionalized following a non-fatal suicide attempt. When evaluated, she’s diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, that bastion of diagnoses perfect for people (75% of whom are female-identified) who don’t fit into our polite definition of functioning. As the book unfolds, she reflects on how (white) women are often pathologized when they buck against systems of oppression that create the dysfunction in them in the first place. That is not to say other women in the institution are not genuinely in need of help, nor that mental illness in women is always from a systemic wound. But it’s crucial in the treatment of female addiction and mental health disorders to considered the systemic factors of gendered violence and patriarchy, and the attitudes we hold about women who struggle with drinking.

Think about female alcoholics in media. If she’s young, she’s a loose, reckless sl*t looking for trouble and deserving of the reality check when she finds it (Amy Schumer in Trainwreck, Lindsay Lohan in general). Or if the woman are older, they are discarded, or gross, or pathetic, or evil like anyone Faye Dunaway played or Eminem’s mom in 8 Mile (deep cut lol). Men are afforded a much larger spectrum of experiences and struggles - Ernest Hemingway, Leaving Las Vegas, Sideways, the dude from A Star is Born, Frank from Shameless (brilliant), frat boys, blue collar workers, introspective tortured artists, fucking IRON MAN. I could go on forever, but I hope that illustrates the depth and diversity of male-centric stories of alcoholism not often afforded to women.

One of the most empathetic and accurate portrayals of female alcoholism, in my opinion, is in the show Sharp Objects (the book, too, but actually witnessing it makes a difference). We see Amy Adams’ Camille swig vodka from an Evian bottle while fending off vicious, veiled attacks from her verbally and emotionally abusive mother and experiencing flashbacks of teenage sexual assault. We watch her struggle to find emotional safety in her conservative hometown, both wanting to fit in and get out in order to survive. We GET why she drinks and I have trouble blaming her for it even as she wreaks havoc on herself and others. We can see her clawing just to make it out alive, and alcohol is the tool she’s using to do it, for better or worse.

Which is where Nesta enters the chat. When we get our first glimpse of her alcohol use is ACOFAS, it’s portrayed as something everyone knows about but that she’s still mostly keeping it together - her dress is clean, her hair is neatly braided, she doesn’t need a chaperone to show up to a family event. The deterioration between ACOFAS and ACOSF is alarming, and we know that alcoholism is a progressive condition so that tends to happen. Was there a particular trigger? That’s hard to say. Solstice certainly didn’t help, especially with the pressures to perform and conform to the standards of the Inner Circle aka the people in power. I imagine seeing her sisters bouncey and reveling in the world that stole them and killed their father was probably.. tough, to say the least. The barge party seems to be a turning point as well, though this one is more confusing to me. But given the child abuse, extreme poverty, sexual assault, kidnapping, bodily violation, witnessing her father’s murder, almost dying, WAR - and that’s not even to mention essentially becoming a refugee - it would be amazing if she DIDN’T drink. She 100% has complex trauma, and is looking for ways to cope.

No one with full capacity dreams of becoming an addict when they grow up. Addiction, in my professional and personal experience, is largely a strategy for coping with a deeper wound. People don’t drink to feel bad. They drink to feel good, and to survive. Nesta herself is drinking to survive, but it’s having the unfortunate side effect of killing her at the same time. As she slides into active addiction, the thought of her own death may even be comforting, and alcohol in that way is her friend. (There's some interesting research right now framing addiction as an attachment disorder, but I don't know enough to speak on it much.)

So she obviously needs help. That’s not a debate. What is a debate is how the IC should best go about intervening. A variation on the Johnson method is used in ACOSF (the one from the show Intervention) and appears to be successful only because they threaten her if she doesn’t comply. This method has mixed data to support it, and while it’s very good at getting people into tx, there is a higher relapse rate for those who receive it (1). The “family” gathers and tells her the ways she’s hurt them and tell her the consequences if she doesn’t seek the help they’re offering. And again, so many of their reason are the effects on THEM, how she’s making THEM look, not her pain.

The IC’s ignorance and dismissal of her alcoholism in ACOSF is frankly mystifying. Why do they intervene on all the drinking and sexing, anyway? It seems like they’ve been fine enough with it up to this point. But now it's gone too far, not because of her illness but because she is embarrassing them. And I don’t know about you, but between Cassian apparently fucking half of Velaris and Mor’s heavily documented emotional drinking, that’s hard to square. It makes it feel much more likely that they don’t like the way she is coping, that she is not fitting into their picture of who she’s supposed to be. This picture is inherently gendered, because Prythian society and those who live in it have explicit and implicit expectations of gender roles, whether they’ll admit it or not. Cassian and Mor are playing their roles well; Nesta is not.

That leads me to believe it is NOT all about her, but the systemic and internal factors influencing their perception of her and the ways she’s struggling. It’s distasteful to them for her, a female, to be deteriorating this publicly, despite the fact that her very identity makes it harder for her to function in the patriarchy of Prythian. We hear almost exclusively about sexual violence against women, aside from 2 male characters. Past or present assault of women is a major plot point on multiple occasions (Mor, Gwyn, Nesta, Emerie, Rhysands mom and sister, the lady of autumn, Cassians mom, Azriels mom, I could go on). But something about the way Nesta is contending with that is unacceptable, and I believe it’s because she’s not trying to cover up her dysfunction. In prythian, we keep these things hidden- Mor’s assault is never processed in full, Azriel’s mom seems to be alone at Rosehall, priestesses are literally hidden inside a mountain for centuries. Women process trauma alone and in the dark, but Nesta is in the light and she is loud. She is refusing to hide her problems, and the IC don’t like that, whether they realize it or not.

So why don’t the IC understand this? Like I said earlier, as a culture we hate addicts, or what they stand for, in very much the same way I think we hate people experiencing homelessness. We convince ourselves it was a series of bad choices that led someone where they are, choices we would never make because we are smart, smarter than them. We believe are more in control than that. We can prevent bad things from happening to us because we are good, because we are better than whoever it’s happening to. But the reality is almost ALL of us are one hospital stay away from homelessness, just as all of us are one trauma away from addiction. And with female addicts, we have another layer of expecting women to only struggle nicely and quietly, or to go away. Intersectional factors are at play here, too: white women are much more likely to have alcoholism attributed to mental health and trauma factors, where people of color often suffer the same addiction being more associated with crime. You can imagine how that plays out differently.

So what is the effect of all this? Gendered expectations lead to not only external stigma around addiction and tx, but also to internalized stigma which can limit willingness to seek tx. (2) Many social forces encourage women to drink and discourage them from telling anyone. Factors such as poverty, family planning, access to education, racial discrimination, and location can make services harder to access. Internally, women are more likely to enter treatment with less confidence in their ability to succeed, but report more strengths and more potential to grow recovery strengths during and following tx. For men, the pattern is reversed (3). And women have more successful tx episodes overall when gendered considerations are a part of the design and implementation of services (4). For Nesta, the effect is that she’s forced into treatment and copes by having hate sex with her ex and changing herself to conform to her family’s expectations while the House and the Valkyrie’s actually take care of her. I do not see how Sarah drew the line from there to recovery, I truly don’t. If anything, she recovers in spite of the ICs intervention, not because of it.

In summary, Nesta Archeron deserved better. Nesta deserved the same compassion the book gives to men who are struggling, and it’s a reflection of not just the book’s culture but the author’s culture that she doesn’t get it. Female alcoholics are worthy of treatment that integrates their identities, as those identities are often essential factors contributing to their addiction. What's shown in ACOSF is a reality many women live, and they shouldn't have to.

Barry Loneck, James A. Garrett & Steven M Banks (1996) The Johnson Intervention and Relapse During Outpatient Treatment, The American Journal of Drug and Alcohol Abuse, 22:3, 363-375, DOI: 10.3109/00952999609001665

Groshkova T, Best D, White W. The Assessment of Recovery Capital: Properties and psychometrics of a measure of addiction recovery strengths. Drug Alcohol Rev. 2013;32(2):187–94.

Best D, Vanderplasschen W, Nisic M. Measuring capital in active addiction and recovery: the development of the strengths and barriers recovery scale (SABRS). Subst Abuse Treat, Prev Policy. 2020;15(1):1–8.

Polak, K., Haug, N.A., Drachenberg, H.E. et al. Gender Considerations in Addiction: Implications for Treatment. Curr Treat Options Psych 2, 326–338 (2015). https://doi.org/10.1007/s40501-015-0054-5

#nesta archeron #pro nesta #alcoholism #mental health #sexism #acotar #acosf #stigma #rehabilitation #prythian university #sjm critical

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astrolavas · 1 year

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Wait that hunter and willow struggle with vulnerabilty essay you mentioned... Hand it over 🫵

KXJSK thank you for enabling my brainrot, let's GO 🫡

okay so, for starters, we all know both hunter and willow tend to hide their vulnerability, push down their feelings and repress a lot, but it's actually super interesting how they do it in completely different ways and for such different reasons.

i've already written one essay about hunter's tendency to do that here, but that was a while ago, so let's refresh it up a little bit with season 3.

hunter lived his entire life in the emperor's coven, as a magicless witch at that, isolated from everyone and manipulated. he got used to ignoring and hiding how he felt, because showing vulnerability in the coven was seen as weakness, and showing his real emotions could have genuinely very very bad consequences for him. especially with him having no magic, he was already disrespected and seen as lesser by everyone (for example, the covenheads) but he yearned to be respected, to be treated well, equally; so he couldn't afford to show any vulnerability there. and when it came to showing negative feelings near belos... well. that especially had the potential to take a dark turn really fast; to provoke belos to do something. it was genuinely dangerous for him to express his emotions, it wasn't safe for him at all. he could NOT do it.

his golden guard persona also comes into play here and it's SO interesting how he uses it. masking (in a literal, psychological AND metaphorical sense); using it to feel braver, to act more confident. taking on a role of the emperor's trusted right-hand man instead of the lonely kid that he was. all this... well, surrounded by that hurtful mentality and hostile coven environment, he had to do it; to be more respected, to be able to do things that he had to do, to actually FUNCTION. it was a necessity for his survival.

but here's the thing, he likes to think of himself as a more of a practical/logical/rational thinker, and he IS in general, that is true, but he actually DOES act based on his emotions and moral compass quite often. he's also really good at reading and analyzing people, and immediately getting them. he's oblivious to some things but overall he's emotionally smart, and very very insightful and perceptive....... it might be sth he's naturally skilled at, but he also definitely had to learn it; had to know how to read belos' mood and probably learnt all the little things he had to watch out for on some days, all the little signs to stop talking or look away. all that was, once again, for his own safety. BUT OKAYKXJSKK we're accidentally going off course here so let's go back slightly- hunter is also VERY expressive (which makes sense considering he wore a mask most of the time. ............. also hyper-expressive autism #real #so true—) so oftentimes his emotions are actually (no matter how hard he tries to hide or deny them) well visible on his face, before he manages to school them; although that also depends on the exact emotion he's feeling, some are more visible than others. so this is interesting, how he simultaneously automatically represses/hides some of his feelings and manifests them as something else but also feels everything so intensely and is such an open book based on his initial facial expressions. both of these facts coexist.

so, vulnerability. we already know hunter has trouble expressing his emotions at times. he loves to pretend he's okay when he clearly isn't; and it takes a LOT for him to open up to someone. he only really lets himself be truly emotionally vulnerable next to people he fully trusts and feels safe with, it doesn't come to him with ease.

that's why his scene with luz in the forest shack's basement is so important. that ENTIRE scene, actually. we can really see how much they've grown to trust each other, how safe they feel in each other's presence. what they had going on with their secret-keeping was not really fully healthy at the time, because they kept comforting each other from their VERY similar perspectives/stances, which just further locked in their mentality of "oh they'll hate both of us when they find out our secrets"; they were ensuring each other's fears by relating to each other; it was a circle. but nevertheless, they still cared about each other and have grown to care about each other even more throughout the few months.

here, hunter managed to admit that he was scared. he felt comfortable enough to admit his vulnerability like that to luz since they've grown closer and truly trusted each other with this. he's grown SO much.

and then... the crying scene. i am not exaggerating when i say this is SUCH an important moment for hunter's character, as well as a perfect insight into his dynamic with luz. especially since the thing that jumpstarted his cry was luz telling him he's family now, and that she wants to ensure he's safe too... all his emotions coming to the surface, him finally not managing to keep stuff in, allowing himself to be vulnerable like that next to someone, actually crying and letting it out instead of holding it in or distancing himself in order to go through it alone... it was a big step for him, and it perfectly illustrated just how much he's grown. and the way luz responded to it was also so thoughtful. she was extremely tired and depressed herself, but she still showed worry. she knew hunter needed space to let it all out and avoided crowding him, since jumping at him with worry and questions and hugs would only make it worse and freak him out, but she initiated a delicate half-hug after a moment, non-verbally expressing her care.

but moving on!

now, let's focus on hunter post-flapjack's death.

it's a big, traumatic event that affects and shakes him a LOT. he doesn't feel good, he doesn't feel happy, and that predictably results in the same thing as always..... hunter repressing his negative feelings and masking them as anger. prioritizing helping others and focusing on a mission at hand. not being sure if he's okay or how he feels or how to express what he feels when someone asks.

this is the behaviour we've ALWAYS seen from him in such situations. in season 2a, when he's just generally unhappy even if he doesn't realize it, and appears as angry and irritable... and in labyrinth runners, when he lives alone while dealing with serious life events; distances himself from everything and everyone, and then tries to act as if nothing had happened, and isn't sure HOW to express/talk abt his feelings, prefers to focus on someone/something else instead. andddd at the end of thanks to them after flapjack's death! when he immediately asks if everyone else is okay and jumps in to comfort luz and focuses on taking belos down; on a task. JUST... AUGHH! he prefers to push through his feelings cuz it's a defense mechanism, the same one he's been using in the past; in the coven. it allowed him to survive, and such instinct is not something that's easy to abandon.

so, this entire pattern is so, so clear in how he acts in for the future too. he tries to mask his grief and sadness with anger and coldness. he keeps pushing people (and palismen) away, distancing himself from others, acting irritable, focusing solely on the mission at hand, just wanting to find belos immediately; thinking about literally anything but flapjack or what happened just a few hours prior, cuz it hurts too much to think about it. the sadness and other emotions that accompany him as a result of flapjack's death keep sneaking up on him in random moments, but he fights not to let them through fully. he cannot allow himself to break down right now.

but then, he's alone for a moment, and he allows himself to feel some vulnerability here. he's overwhelmed by what's happening and misses flapjack. and, as always, he doesn't know what to say. he feels everything so intensely inside but he has no idea how to express that on the outside, he doesn't know how to put everything that he thinks and feels into proper words; how to accurately communicate everything he wants to communicate to gus and willow. he struggles with that.

but just like willow had her arc of repression (to be talked about in a second) and finally realized she can rely on other people too and allowed herself to show feelings and vulnerability instead of letting it all consume her from the inside out, hunter similarly let himself show some of that vulnerability to his friends. in the span of that moment, driven by pure instinct and his love for his friends, he managed to put what he'd always wanted to say into words.

he also realized that flapjack is always going to be a part of him in a way (both literally and metaphorically), even when he's not actually there, and it brought him some comfort at last... it didn't heal him or got rid of his grief ofc, there's a long journey ahead of him, but it helped him with the first step of dealing with grief and accepting what had happened.

now, when we compare how he is with feelings right now to how he was at the beginning of the series, he's truly grown so much. he's always gonna somewhat struggle with expressing his emotions and vulnerability, but now that he's surrounded by people who care about him, whom he trusts with his life, who he doesn't fear being vulnerable around, it's going to be so much easier for him. of course, there are always going to be instances where something bad happens and he represses again; his defense mechanism and trauma response aren't going to just instantly disappear like that. but he has people he can be his true self around now, people he can confide in; it's going to help him a lot. and he's going to continue growing, and developing as a person.

.....yeah! okay, now... willow time!!

willow's repression arc has always been always kinda sprinkled in and hinted at throughout the duration of the series. we know she was bullied for a significant amount of time and it affected her confidence a lot, but it also made her repress and push down her feelings.

i'd say her arc almost had... two parts to it. the first one was her coming out of her shell, gaining confidence and embracing her strength. the second one: her struggle with vulnerability and repressing feelings.

meeting luz and transferring to plant track was what definitely helped her with the confidence problem. she flourished (lol) after she was allowed to embrace her interests and strengths. but what remained, was that willow saw her insecurity and emotions as her weaknesses. she even said it herself, she most of all wants to protect everyone she loves (similar to hunter actually), and all-together that resulted in her shutting herself off and just focusing on others' feelings. wanting to be reliable for her friends, seeing herself as the "strong one" in the group; the rock. the mature one.

always pretending she's okay and fine with everything, putting a smile on her face through it all. because after all, she doesn't want others to worry about her, right? (she did it for all emotions too, basically)

especially if we take into account that she was bullied and seen as inferior to others for years + her entire past with amity + just in general her history with the abomination track and the expectations from her dads regarding it, all of it was trauma for willow and she ended up with the need to hide her feelings (something she saw as her weakness/flaws/weak spots) as a coping mechanism. she hated being seen as weak, and after she gained more confidence in herself, that feeling only grew.

in for the future, we could see just how much the suppression was affecting her. she still tried to be cheerful, dependable, not bothering anyone with her own worries, trying to make others feel better. but with each next moment, every feeling of hers builds up more and more, until finally it cannot be contained anymore. and explodes.

her magic is actually also a great metaphor/illustration of her feelings suppression. whenever willow's especially feeling things, we can always see how her magic reacts too it, how her emotions manifest through it. and this scene in ftf is a great visual representation of it; how the vines slowly cover her until she's completely buried under them. how helpless she feels. man...

but at last, she allows herself to let her feelings out. she's assured that she's not any worse for it, told that reliable people can rely on others as well. she lets all her worries and fears and thoughts and vulnerability finally show, instead of letting it all consume her from the inside out. it's such a turning moment for her. because from then on, she's shown to genuinely express more emotions and not depend entirely on herself, now that she's aware it doesn't make her any less strong. she's assured none of her friends are gonna think any less of her, or to see her as weak, and that's good.

actually, another thing i wanna bring up is willow being saved and bridal-carried by hunter in this scene.

could she have saved herself? yes, most likely, just like she did in any sport in a storm, when she was still suppressing any weaknesses of hers and relying on herself only. if hunter hadn't teleported to save her, she'd probably do just that. but this little moment is actually such a good illustration of how now that she's allowing herself to depend on others too (instead of just be dependable), she allows herself to be saved. when she needs it.

see, this is actually the thing i've seen lots of people confused about because "willow is independent, she wouldn't want to be saved" and... that actually confuses me, because it truly misses the very core of her character arc.

the point is that she CAN take care of herself and she wants others (especially people who see her as weak) to know that and to not underestimate her abilities (just like we've seen in labyrinth runners, for example). but, at the same time, she also wasn't allowing herself to take her guard off or to be saved by others for a long time exactly for that same reason; because she didn't want to be seen as weak anymore. she wanted to be seen as only strong and independent, to the point where she deemed any weakness of hers as bad.

like, that's the entire point of her character, her repressing negative feelings then finally allowing herself to open up and be more vulnerable (+ realizing it doesn't make her any less strong). she doesn't hate being saved necessarily, she hates being seen as inferior and weak and incompetent. for example, willow hated when amity constantly tried to save her in labyrinth runners instead of letting her take care of things herself or acknowledging her strengths because it made her think amity thought she was not capable of protecting herself. because it was amity saving her from the smallest things. it made her feel disrespected, as if she was called weak right to her face.

now... hunter never saw willow as weak, ever, and he knows perfectly well that she can take care of herself. he respects her and likes her in her entirety, both for her strength as well as her softer, more vulnerable side. BUT in moments when he thinks she does need protecting or saving, he doesn't hesitate to do so. and now that willow has let herself be more vulnerable and realized she can let herself rely on others more, she clearly appreciates and doesn't mind it whatsoever.

the mutual trust and respect is the actual key point in hunter and willow's relationship; they both know each of them are strong and skilled and able to protect themselves, but they also know each others' vulnerabilities and want to protect each other when a situation actually calls for it. both willow and hunter want the ppl they care abt (each other included) to be safe and they will protect them when they need it, but neither of them would like... completely discredit someone's abilities to stay safe on their own. so when it comes to willow's strength complex, hunter knows when willow can take it cuz he respects her and trusts her abilities, but when she actually needs it, he'll gladly save and protect her as his priority; but not in frivolous instances when she can take care of herself. and she will do the same for him.

so yeah!

tldr; it's actually super cool how both willow and hunter repress their feelings a lot and prioritize others over themselves but it manifests in such different ways and comes from slightly different circumstances/reasonings for each of them.

willow more-so feels like she has to be the more mature one in the group, and she pretends she's okay and fine and focuses on how others are feeling instead of herself cuz she wants to be dependable and hates showing weakness or being seen as weak. whereas, hunter isn't sure how to express himself and when he feels negative things, they manifest as anger/irratibility. he prefers to focus on some productive task instead and he prefers to distance himself from others, and it also all comes down to how he grew up in the coven and how he was raised by belos. like it's... SO interesting how they both do something so similar at its core but so differently.

#i don't have a phd in willow's character though so i can't write as much abt her as i can abt hunter kxjsk but yEA... it's all so neat to me #toh #the owl house #my toh talk #hunter #willow #nicole answers #Anonymous

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lutawolf · 7 months

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My Personal Weatherman and the D/s element Ep 6

If you haven't read my other meta on the show, I suggest you do! You can find them here.

I adore that Segasaki put a tracker on Yoh.

However, it looks as though it was pointless because it's as if Yoh wants to get caught. Slow doesn't even begin to describe this boy.

Now it's finally useful. He has found his man and told him in no uncertain terms to make up an excuse and come back home. Now, if he were an actual slave, he would be unable to say no. If he were deep subservient... He would be unable to say no. I know you normies are thinking, damn. Don't they have rights Luta!? They Don't Want Them! They are not you. For some people, they just don't want to make decisions. Now is Yoh that type of submissive is the question though. Let's see what Yoh does.

I love that Yoh at least has someone on the outside of things he can talk to. She clearly understands Segasaki. I really like the husband. Mickey and Minnie are well suited to each other.

Flashback time!!!

So it all starts in the school cafeteria. OMG, I love how Yoh pauses as soon as he sees Segasaki. Then he has to sit back down because he doesn't know what else to do. His original thought is no longer there. All that encompasses his gray matter is Segasaki. "The first time I saw that person. I thought they might not be from this planet. At least out of all the sculptures that I've ever seen, he's the most beautiful." Then he gives that soft smile. So freaking cute! "The shape of his ears, the line of his nose, the angle of the jawline, the fullness of their lips. Even the shape of their unseen eyeballs must be beautiful."

He then rushes to the store to buy what it will take to draw this beautiful boy. Yoh had it bad right off, but he doesn't understand it himself. Did they really call him loner guy? "If I were a girl, I would have thought it was love at first sight. But it was just a beautiful man." Yoh, you is an idiot. I love you, but you is an idiot. Okay, so he even knows that he is lying to himself. That's fair, we all do it.

I really am not a fan of these people. Loner guy? Really. These people look down on Yoh. Yup, nope, that solidified it. I don't like them.

Bless baby's heart. He is so anxious. I'm in love with Segasaki straight away because I think he fell in love with Yoh pretty fast too. Right off, we see Segasaki easily takes control. The way he tells Yoh, "Let's go." and grabs his arm then backpack to control Yoh's direction and to push him where he wants. He then keeps his hand there.

Right off, they easily drop into a D/s relationship. This is how you would see a D/s relationship develop naturally. Guidelines are always a good but for the fiftieth million time, lifestyle people are different from scene. We are naturally always Dom or always submissive, so we don't turn that off. It's going to naturally be seen even in friendship, but that doesn't mean that a Dom should expect a submissive friend to just listen. A submissive can always put guidelines and boundaries up, but to think that these relationships don't organically happen is ignorant. Yoh is submissive right off the back, just look at how he asks Segasaki if this is okay. Segasaki is Dom right off the bat.

I adore how close they are to each other. Segasaki has no concept of space when it comes to Yoh. Oh, these two. In the way, Segasaki asks Yoh what he is doing. Sees Yoh's indecisiveness, finds a book, and then gives him a command. Fulling expecting Yoh to absolutely tell him what he thinks of the book. "If he were to suddenly despise me, it might be the end of me." Those some deep feelings there.

I can't wait to see Segasaki's side of things!!! We know that Yoh's perception of things are easily distorted by his emotions. He is inclined to having a glass half empty mindset.

Please note, that Yoh as of yet hasn't acknowledged Segasaki's message. The submissive is not listening. We are not looking at a slave or a deep submissive.

Hahaha. Being drunk and clingy are absolutely who he is Mickey my dear.

OMG, This is the best! I'm Dying. I love Segasaki and I love Segasaki's personality and his jealousy. I'm in love with these mother fucking characters oh so much.

The way he stomps over and pulls back the curtains. "You can finish remotely right." I assure you, Segasaki wasn't actually asking a question. Still, Yoh faced with an angry Dom says yes. Said angry, Dom grabs him and begins to pull him away.

Leaving Minnie and Mickey both stunned and impressed. I think Mickey just developed his first guy crush.

Bombastic side eye. Oh damn... Here comes the miscommunication. Yoh is talking about Segasaki and Segasaki is talking about Mickey. Poor baby.

Yoh finds the tracker. Boy knows what that is and tells Segasaki, I put it back where I found it. But Segasaki is pissed. He thinks Yoh likes Mickey. Lawd these two. If they ever learn to communicate.

I can't wait for the next episode!!! I'm so in love with these two!!!

#luta talks my personal weatherman #luta talks taikan yoho #segasaki x yoh #luta talks kink #my personal weatherman #taikan yoho #coconuts mafia

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hellobabydoll333 · 1 month

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Fixing My Bad Habits {goals + how to achieve them}

Goals:

Asleep by 10:00 pm

Sleeping by 10 PM allows your body to keep a consistent melatonin secretion pattern, which in turn helps the body's internal rhythms function properly and provide natural rest and renewal at night.

Drinking more water

For optimal health and well-being, it is recommended to consume around 2-3 liters of water per day as a rough guideline.

Regular exercise

Lots of benefits that maintain & improve physical body such as flexibility, increased energy levels (which I definitely need), sleep quality & strength and mental health such as enhanced productivity, confidence and self-compassion.

Meditation

To reduce my stress & anxiety levels, as well as increase my self esteem as I’m spending more time with myself and my thoughts. But also improving my focus & concentration while also taking a break from the world around me.

Study

I have a course I have to prepare for me and I’m not tryna be the only person who don’t know shit.

More Positive Self Talk

If you know my blog, you know I do a lot of vaunting- basically affirmations- but I sometimes even stray away. However I noticed that when I do stay talking positively about myself, I see everything from such a lighter perspective. I talked a bit about this in LOA Reminders, but I’m all about self love & acceptance and even though I have this blog I’m still on this journey as well.

Journaling

Journaling is so fun y’all. It’s like… why tell other people my problems when I can tell myself…? It enhances self AND emotional awareness, provides a healthy outlet for your thoughts & feelings, helps you reflect & understand yourself more and provides a safe, non-judge mental place for you vent & express your frustrations. Journaling also provides a sense of clarity & direction & helps with setting goals and maintains focus & so much more. 10/10 def recommend. You don’t even have to write or type.. you could do video diaries. I def wanna try that.

Good Posture

Y’all ever seen that video of wonyoung sitting with such good posture like… I need that. Good posture supports your spine and promotes good breathing and circulation while also enhancing your self perception & self awareness & making you seem more approachable

How I am going to achieve them

By starting off small. I noticed that when I rush into things, I often give up, thinking it’s too much for me to keep up with. And that’s okay...

Asleep by 9:45 pm

Drink 3 bottles of water everyday.

I do about three exercises per day.

5 minutes meditation twice a day.

2 educational videos everyday & at the end of the day, write out what I’ve learned

Say a vaunt at least three times a day- morning, afternoon & night.

Journaling at the end of every day and whenever else I need to rant. Y’all ever feel like y’all over share cuz that’s definitely me… but honestly sometimes you just need to talk to yourself. Self reflection is important.

Posture. I’m already pretty aware of my posture when I sit most times so I just sit up right, but I will be practicing self awareness more and eventually perfect posture will be natural to me.

As soon as I find myself naturally in a routine, I will then do a slow & small increase which will lead to another increase.

Remember: Don’t rush yourself and it’s okay to slip up. But it’s also crucial to try your best to not fall off of a routine because getting back on it can be really hard.

#angeldust.mp3 #dream girl #it girl #self concept #law of assumption #dream girl tips #loassumption #wonyoungism #self care #level up #girlblog #this is a girlblog #girblogger #girlblogging #mental wellness #glow up #dream girl guide #SoundCloud #pretty princess syndrome

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celaenaeiln · 8 months

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Batman Issue #137 is fantastic

It's written so well it feels like a literary masterpiece, and I'm truly in awe of how well it's done. The parallelism, the character development and deterioration, the logic, the emotion, the art-all of it is spectacularly written. Like the people who wrote this issue must be some kind of geniuses to condens nearly a century of dc comic writing to come up with this. I highly, highly suggest everyone go read it because this is the most accurate representation of the members to date.

I know what I said is a contentious opinion but I think we need to step back from the issue and evaluate it from a "who is batman" perspective.

Batman at his core is a selfish human being. He created the identity because he wanted vengeance for the murder of his family, not because he particularly wanted to save the world. It's this desire that led him into a world of crime fighting because he refused to be the same as the person holding the gun.

Batman 137 is the peak depiction of Batman as an uncontrollable force of nature and what I love about this comic is they nailed him to a T. The batfamily's perception of Bruce are so accurate.

Dick and Barbara are exactly on the dot. He is out of control but also he's doing this to be in control.

Canonically, Bruce has a god complex.

And I know I shouldn't quote wiki but I like the way they worded their response:

"A god complex is an unshakable belief characterized by consistently inflated feelings of personal ability, privilege, or infallibility. The person is also highly dogmatic in their views, meaning the person speaks of their personal opinions as though they were unquestionably correct."

That is the core of who Bruce is.

Every action Bruce takes, he believes it is the best action. He is confident in his ability and he ensures his successes through planning and training. I believe in Dick and Barbara's points combined-Bruce is going out of control in order to be in control. He feels what he has done is not enough and thus is doing everything he can to correct that issue. To him, his personal opinions are unquestionably correct because he has analyzed every possible route to proceed in and has come to the one he believes is best.

This man was never meant to be a lovely family man which is precisely why Robin is so important to batman. Him hugging his kids, saying he's sorry, praising them-that's him on his very best days where everything is going his way. It's him on days where he's reaching into the past. It's him on days where he's tired and broken done. But that's not who he is at his worst.

And this issue is the downward cascade of his mental state.

At his worst, Bruce is the type of person who beats his kids for not following his rules:

He beats them for not obeying his orders:

He punishes them by endangering their loved ones:

He hurts them for not follow his rules and purposefully sets up tasks for them to fail for the purpose of them failing:

But

But even though he's done horrible things, he's not a bad person. he does it because he believes he's working in the city's best interest. And Jason understands this so well.

The reason why Selina calls Jason Batman's biggest failure is not because he's actually a failure but because he's the clearest proof of everything wrong with Bruce's God Complex.

Where Jason sees leniency, Bruce sees fault.

That's what makes their relationship so amazing. Bruce and Jason will never see eye to eye because their fundamental beliefs are different. It's a teetering relationship because they love each other but they can never accept each other and that delicate balance makes them so exciting (yeah sorry I love fcked up relationships).

Tim is on the fence

Before I can explain Tim's interaction, I need to drop Dick's, Cass's, Stephanie's and Duke's too

Okay back to Tim. Notice the extent of Bruce's reaction to each of the batfamily's views. Jason's view is the farthest from Bruce's and as a result he received the harshest punishment. Tim's view is grey and in response, Bruce's answer was grey too - a warning but not a damnation. Dick, Cass, Stephanie, and Duke's view on the issue was silence. They express no stand on the Selina vs Bruce's debate of criminals and as a result they receive an answer fitting of that.

The writers characterized each member of the family so, so, SO well. Everyone's perspective and character was on point and it didn't degrade any of their abilities, strengths, emotions, beliefs, or anything.

Furthermore, the family stands as one.

Dick checks in on Jason's mental health and makes sure he's feeling okay. Tim stops Bruce from killing Jason or hurting him too badly. The rest of the family shows up in time to protect the both of them and each other. Jason and Dick work together to bring Bruce down. When all of them talk on the batfamily channel, everyone gets an equal chance to speak including Steph. Which is a rarity.

The family dynamic is accurate.

Tim would look to Dick as the defacto leader for answers when Bruce is gone just like he did in every single other comic.

Damian would 100000% punch Jason in the face. He electrocuted him before, tried to kick him out, and attacked him before- he's not suddenly going to have reservations now.

Jason and Selina would absolutely work together the most and best because of their shared values and understanding of Gotham.

No one in this issue is irrational or out of character. Everything is so exact about this comic I'm over the moon by it! Sure it's not a "let's hug it out, guys!" issue but when has that ever made it bad? It's exciting, fun, meaningful, and logical and I love Bruce Wayne so incredibly much for it. I love the way he thinks, the way he acts, and what he believes.

If I were to characterize in a nutshell, I'd say issues 136 and 137 are all you need. The authors who created this - so much praise to them. They've capture each character as well as the family dynamic perfectly.

I can't speak much of Damian's intentions and behavior as of now because he's just entered the scene but I'm excitedly looking forward to the next issue.

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nonbinarydeity · 2 years

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GUYS!!!!! I DID IT!! I PUT THE PIECES TOGETHER, AND I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT MANIFESTING IS AND HOW TO DO IT NOW!!!!!!!

Ehem. Sorry. I'm very excited at the moment. Without further Ado, here is my epiphany from today!! As always, these are just my personal opinions, so take what resonates and leave the rest ❤️

The 4D is one part of reality. That is to say, imagination is an entire half of our experience. The other half of our experience is, of course, the physical reality, or 3D. This makes up one portion of US; I call it our awareness, and it is also called our consciousness. The other part of us is the part that remembers everything, known as the subconscious mind in the community.

The subconscious mind is often referred to as the creator of our reality, and in reality the subconscious mind is just as much a part of us as our imagination and our actual physical reality. Basically, the subconscious is our god state, higher self, etc. When we access it directly, we get into the void state, where we are pure consciousness, with no awareness.

So okay, we are consciousness and the subconscious, but what does that MEAN? The answer is so simple, and it's something repeated time and time again: you create your reality ENTIRELY. Every single thing (and this includes bad things like trauma, more on that in a sec) is created by your mind, because you aren't just awareness, you are also reality itself. The subconscious mind is everything and nothing (the void). It remembers everything but sees nothing, instead it reflects what happens in your mind onto the outside experience. Meanwhile, the conscious mind is the one that feeds the subconscious its information; it is the part that actually thinks. This is why changing your thoughts or your imagination or affirming or scripting WORKS. It's because you are BOTH the creator AND the creation.

Basically, our perception of reality and our perception of our thoughts is one part of us as a whole being. The other half of us is reality itself, every single possibility, waiting for us to tell us what is true so it can create that experience. That is why we can manifest. It also explains eiypo, because everyone and everything IS you: reality is literally created by your thoughts.

Okay, now onto explain why bad things aren't your fault, but first we need to understand that our mind tries to protect us from fully realizing our potential. Even as babies we were master manifestors, and as children we are better at manifesting because we have less limiting beliefs, so our mind needs to create barriers to protect us, because otherwise we would create our realities and possibly get hurt. Also, what child is ready to realize the responsibility that comes with this?

So, the mind plays a clever little trick on us, and separates our conscious and our subconscious minds, thus creating the effect of reality being your thoughts filtered by your EGO, which is basically you but without the knowledge that you are literally the creator of everything.

The good news is, you can TOTALLY bypass this whole thing by purposely affirming and ignoring what your senses are telling you. The subconscious mind is separated from your awareness, so it only has your neuron pathways to go by (basically the pathways created by your consistent thoughts), and it takes the information from those pathways and converts it into reality. Most of the time, reality is fixed, because most people don't know that they can control it, but once you find out how to, you can create these same pathways by just believing in something.

I like to refer to reality as being an elaborate scheme by your brain to make you not realize you're a god lmao.

So basically, until you learn to control it, this process of manifestation is controlled by the ego, and not by you directly. Because of this, you manifested/ created your trauma, along with everything else, but it is NEVER your fault that bad things happen until you FULLY realize your highest self, at which point you will have total control over your reality.

So how do you realize your highest self? It's really easy really! Just think how you normally do AS YOUR GOD SELF. Know that you have everything you want, because you are EVERY possibility, reality, circumstance, person, etc. Everything is you, everything comes from you, and nothing will ever stop that, so use it wisely.

Did I explain this well enough? It's kinda all over the place but I REALLY hope it makes sense because this is literally my thoughts in the god state. Good luck everyone!!

#law of assumption #master manifestor #law of attraction #living in the end #manifestation #manifest #manifesting #self concept affirmations #loassumption #loa

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weeb-polls-with-pip · 4 months

Text

Autistic Anime Boys Prelims - Propaganda Division - Group 9

Propaganda:

Shinpei -

"Has a tendency to ignore his emotions in high stress situations in favor of looking at everything logically, even when it is detrimental for him to take that approach. Keeps meticulous track of everything that happens around him."

Sunny -

"Sunny has been told that his face is not expressive. He doesn't talk a lot and he often gets lost into his imagination. He is a great listener and recalls a lot of information being told he has a great memory (he is able to remember a whole speech about flower symbolism that his friend told him) He is compared to a cat."

Yuki -

"He has difficulty communicating with other people and suffers from extreme social anxiety, feeling like he's drowning when placed in uncomfortable social situations or scenarios where she doesn't know how to respond. This also causes him to go red in the face and clench his jaw, which other characters wrongfully interpret as him becoming angry. Through meeting Haru (and getting pulled into his plan to save the world), he becomes friends with him and Natsuki and develops his own strong interest in fishing."

Meursault -

"not only is he based on the character from camus' l'étranger who has actual scholarly debate on him being autistic, meursault is just… so autism. hes this stoic, terse guy with resting bitch face who doesnt really seem to fully process that he isnt showing any emotions and that that offputs people, and hes very blunt and literal with things. once another character asked if he had metal for brains as an insult and he responded by telling him the exact chemical composition of his brain to show that it is not metal. once the other characters made food so bad that when he tasted it he went on a minute straight long monologue about how much it sucked. he then proceeded to cook his own food which the giant evil chicken monster man that was judging the food tasted and said was so intensely done to the letter of the recipe that it was too boring. hes like if autism was a guy and that guy was french."

Zack -

"does things based almost solely on whether or not he wants to, at one point in the series, he doesn't tell the rest of the cast that he can fly a spaceship because he doesn't feel like it. he also take everything everyone else tells him seriously, such as when another character he knew as a kid said they were going to get married one day, he took it very seriously and was confused when said character tried to confess her feelings again and he said he thought their promise from when they were kids was still on."

Joujirou -

"This boy is autism incarnate. No social skills, no normal pain perception, complete weirdo. He even has a special interest which becomes a mild issue when he joins the main cast lol."

Alus the Star Runner -

"He’s a three-armed wyvern gunslinger with cool goggles and a lightsaber. Need I say more? …Okay then. Alus was born as a mutant cripple and rejected by his kind but managed to overcome this and rise up to become Flying Reptile Indiana Jones. He’s famed as the greatest adventurer in the land, but also struggles to keep up a conversation and prefers to remain on his own (which is especially unusual for wyverns, who usually gather in giant flocks). He has exactly one (1) friend, whom he completely fails to understand as a person but still values and respects immensely. Despite his difficulties with social interaction, he’s repeatedly shown to be incredibly resourceful and intelligent, with a single-minded drive and persistence unmatched by anyone else in the series. (Also canonically asexual, because who needs a family when you can fight dragons perfectly well on your own?)"

Mamoru -

"the ORIGINAL autistic magical boy."

Shizuka -

"he's the most emotionally intelligent & mentally stable member of the cast & he's in love with the least emotionally intelligent & most emotionally volatile character ever. he's constantly got the vibe of looking into the camera like he's in the office while he's dealing with everyone else's bullshit. he's so steadfast & loyal that it makes me want to cry. he's so bad at expressing himself in a way that other people understand that for the longest time the boy he's in love with thinks that Doumeki doesn't even like him."

Idia -

"He’s a shut-in weirdo with long messy hair, a sleep deprived look in his eyes, and one of the few students to have a hoodie as part of his school uniform. He’s a prodigal tech genius with the vibes of burn out and depression. He’s usually quite meek around people, but when he clicks with a conversation topic, he gets all energetic and fired up and sometimes a bit haughty too. To avoid going out of his room and interacting with people face to face, he invented a mobile tablet with text to speech. He stays up all night playing video games and while he has trouble with IRL relationships, he’s made a genuine friend out of one of his gaming buddies (who he doesn’t realize is actually one of his classmates). He stans an idol group and once got into a hacking war against some dorm mates over it. He rebuilt his dead brother as a robot who has become somewhat of a therapist to him. The only reason he went out on a holiday vacation with school acquaintances is due to the location being featured in an anime, then bonded with the one guy’s grandma when he realized his favorite girl was based on her. For the Halloween celebration, he convinced his dorm to theme themselves after his favorite B horror movie, constantly infodumping to people about it and going all out in recreating the special effects. In Book 5, he has a minor background arc of being forced to do public speaking. In another Halloween event, he was forced to be a back-up singer and managed to pull through despite the social anxiety. He’s the most autistic student in all of Night Raven College and possibly in all of Twisted Wonderland too."

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mysteryshoptls · 8 months

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SSR Lilia Vanrouge - Beach Wear Vignette

"Lilia's Super Deluxe Uninhabited Island Special"

[Uninhabited Island – Cottage]

Lilia: Here we go, Stitch. Time to start prepping "that" thing.

Stitch: Got it, okay!

Lilia: First, we need a large pot…

Lilia: Then we take all the fresh fruit we gathered, and… GO LIKE THIS!!

[squeezes fruit]

Stitch: Weehoo ♪

Lilia: Kufufu, doesn't it look delicious? Fresh fruit always tastes best raw or juiced like this.

Lilia: We'll just squeeze the mango and pineapple with magic, just like this…

Stitch: Yeehaw!

Lilia: Ohh…? You've got a tight grip on that pineapple there…

[CRUNCH, CRUNCH CRUNCH!]

Lilia: Nice going, Stitch! You got some nice 100% Juice flowing almost instantly.

Lilia: Kufufu, then I'll leave the squeezing of all the fruit to you.

Lilia: But I can't let you show me up. Let's see, here's the clear water we pulled from the waterfall…

[turns water to ice]

Stitch: !!

Lilia: Surprised? If I use magic like this, I can freeze water no problem.

Lilia: But I have to make sure I don't get carried away and use too much. We don't know when Gantu might attack us next.

Stitch: Yay!

Lilia: Have you finished squeezing the fruits already? Kufufu, you sure are a strong one, Stitch.

Lilia: …You are just like him.

Stitch: ?

Lilia: There's this guy named Malleus. He's descended from dragons, and his power is overwhelming.

Lilia: Even the hardest coconut shell is nothing more than a fragile eggshell in his hands.

Lilia: And he would also throw tantrums left and right if something didn't suit him.

Lilia: Like punching holes in the walls, or encasing the castle in ice, or raining down thunderbolts… To put simply, he was a pretty rambunctious kid.

Stitch: Bad boy appeared… Grr.

Lilia: I suppose so. There definitely are those who think he is a bad boy.

Stitch: Aw...

Lilia: If the people around him are frightened and try to avoid him, of course he'll turn out to be a rowdy kid.

Lilia: But, you know, Stitch. I think that it's okay for a bad kid to stay as they are.

Stitch: ?

Lilia: You may be hunted by Gantu just because you're a bad boy who likes to destroy things...

Lilia: But you've helped us so much with your amazing strength. The most important thing is how you use that power of yours.

Stitch: Ye-huh ♪

Lilia: …Well, I guess you could also say it also depends on the circumstances, too.

Stitch: ？

Lilia: Aw, but, I think that your aggressive and cute little self is just the most charming little thing!

Stitch: Oooh!

Lilia: Mhm, that's a good smile. Okay then, let's get back to the task at hand, Stitch.

Lilia: I say that, but all that's left for us to do is to add some more fruit juice.

Lilia: Oh yeah, we'll need a bowl to serve what we made. The shells are a little too small, so maybe we can make something out of the branches and leaves?

Stitch: Hah-ha!

[thock, thock, thock…]

Lilia: Oho, that's…

[Uninhabited Island – Cottage]

Jack: Lilia-senpai, did something happen? Why'd you call us all to the cottage like this suddenly?

Grim: Sniff, sniff, sniff… Funyaa～ I smell something sweet.

Ace: Eh! Oh, is this some kind reward for all our hard work gathering fruits and drawing water every day?

Floyd: A reward? Well, obviously we should be getting' something, I've been working sooo hard～

Lilia: Very perceptive. You're right, it's a reward! Something I've prepared for each and every one of you. And it's…

Everyone: It's?

Lilia: A FROZEN DESSERT!!

Grim: A frozen dessert!! …Like what?

Azul: He must be talking about a type of sweet made from freezing fruit juice and the like.

Azul: Since it's made of the ingredients found on this island, it could possibly be a sorbet… or perhaps a frappe?

Lilia: Correct. I'm treating you all to some cooooold shaved ice.

Grim: Shaved ice! Yuuuum, hurry and give me some!

Ace: Me too, me too! Every day's so hot, I'd been wanting to have something like ice cream.

Lilia: Kufufu, no need to fret.

Lilia: Now then, I'll take this bucket full of ice, and… DO THIS!

[CRACK!]

Ace: All the ice just shattered from that hand chop!?

Riddle: Lilia-senpai can even fell a large tree almost instantly. …Honestly, nothing surprises me anymore.

Lilia: Once you get a mound of shaved ice into one of the bowls that Stitch made for us…

Lilia: Drizzle some of the syrup we made from the fruits, and… IT'S READY TO EAT!

Lilia: Okay, let's start with you, Grim. Make sure you savor the flavor.

Grim: Nom, slurp, crunch, nom! Oooowee, it's so cold and tast…

Grim: URK!?

Ace: Grim!? Lilia-senpai, don't tell me you made the syrup out of that terrible tasting fruit…!?

Grim: Urgh, my head is numb… But it's so sweet and cold, it's crazy good!

Ace: Oh, you just ate it all tooo fast and got a headache. Sheesh, you scared me.

Lilia: Alright, everyone! I'll make one for all of you. [Yuu], what kind of syrup do you want?

1. Mango flavored! 2. Pineapple flavored!

Azul: I would like to have pineapple flavored syrup. It should have a nice tartness to it for a crisp taste.

Jack: I'll… try the mango. If I'm going to eat it with ice, I'd rather have a richer flavor.

Ace: Lilia-senpai, can I have both?

Floyd: Oh, is that allowed? Then I want both too～

Lilia: Here's the mango flavored one. And this one's the pineapple. And a combo for Ace and Floyd.

Jack: It's so cold and delicious. It's refreshing and I feel like this is a nice way to cool down.

Floyd: Yup. I thought it'd be nothing special 'cause it's just fruit juice over ice, but this syrup is pretty bangin'.

Ace: This syrup rocks! The parts where the mango and pineapple mix together is the best part.

Azul: What, really? Urk, I should have also chosen to have both…

Lilia: Kufufu, there's still a lot of syrup, you can have seconds. And it's all because Stitch helped me so much.

Stitch: Yahahahaha ♪

Lilia: But we have to make sure everyone gets their first helping first.

Lilia: Riddle, have you made a decision? If you're still having trouble choosing, you can also get both syrups.

Riddle: No, thank you, that's unnecessary.

Riddle: My mother always would say, "You cannot eat food made of ice, for they will chill your stomach."

[Uninhabited Island – Cottage]

Lilia: Riddle, have you made a decision? If you're still having trouble choosing, you can also get both syrups.

Riddle: No, thank you, that's unnecessary.

Riddle: My mother always would say, "You cannot eat food made of ice, for they will chill your stomach."

Ace: Ehh! You gonna worry about that now!? There's no way she'd find out even if you had some now.

Floyd: You don't get it at all, huh, Goldfish-chan. It'll be even more delicious when you snag a bite to eat even after your mom says no.

Lilia: Now, now. It's impolite to comment on the customs of other families.

Riddle: Indeed. Therefore, please don't worry about me…

Lilia: Then, I'll make a special dish just for you, Riddle.

Lilia: I'll freeze the mango with my magic, and… DO THIS AND THEN THIS!

Azul: Oho, you've sliced the frozen mangos thin, almost replicating the shaved ice.

Floyd: And you served it in a coconut half shell as a bow. It's all decorated with frozen bananas, pineapples, and even flowers, too.

Lilia: Here you go, Riddle. It's a "Chilled Fruit Dish." There's not a single piece of ice on it.

Riddle: …Heh. This certainly is a dish "made out of fruit" and not "made out of ice."

Riddle: Thank you, Lilia-senpai. Then, I shall dig in…

Riddle: !!

Riddle: Delicious! The fruit just dissolves instantly as soon as it touches my tongue… This is the first I've ever had such a thing.

Grim: Funyaa～～! No fair that just Riddle gets some! Lilia, me too! Me toooo～!

Floyd: Ehh, I wanna eat some too. Goldfish-chan, give me a bite!

Lilia: Okay, okay, I got it. I'll make some for everyone, so just wait a moment.

Azul: But really… Who would even think of freezing fruit only to shave them? Lilia-san, that was a brilliant idea.

Lilia: I just tried copying this one snack I tasted during one of my trips to a tropical country.

Lilia: In the past, there was many a time that I had to make this sort of thing. When it comes to frozen desserts, I'm really quite particular.

Lilia: At first, I was only able to make simple dishes, like shaved ice with drizzled nectar or fruit juice…

Lilia: But there was this one guy who would just revel at eating the shaved ice I'd make him.

Lilia: I thought he'd get bored of continuously eating the same thing, so I tried to make it look more and more gorgeous, adding condensed milk or honey-soaked fruit to them.

Lilia: Back then, I wasn't very used to cooking, but I bet if I tried again now, I could probably make something much fancier.

Lilia: Alright, Lilia's Super Deluxe Uninhabited Island Special is ready! Come, eat it before it melts.

1. Let's dig in! 2. Thank you very much!

Grim: Nom, nom nom!! That rich, sweet flavor just completely melts in my mouth～!

Jack: It's more flavorful than just drizzling the syrup on the ice. This is the first time I've ever eaten fruit like this.

Ace: This frozen banana is also crazy good. It's got a way different texture than the raw stuff. You should try this too, [Yuu].

Lilia: What do you think, Stitch? Is it good?

Stitch: …

Riddle: He's looking very forlornly at his empty shaved ice bowl. Perhaps he would like seconds.

Lilia: Or maybe… Did looking at the cup remind you of someone?

Stitch: …

Riddle: Now that you mention it, the bowls that Stitch made for our shaved ice does have an interesting shape to it.

Riddle: It has a conical shape, as if for ice cream, or gelato…

Lilia: Hm. Well, that reminds me that I once saw shaved ice being sold at a food stand in this one tropical country in a similar conical shape.

Lilia: A tricycle carrying a silver box was parked on the side of the road. They were selling shaved ice to those walking by.

Lilia: Eating shaved ice with a ton of syrup on a hot day is the absolute best. You should try it sometime.

Riddle: Eating while walking is… Ah, never mind. Yes, alright. Perhaps if the occasion arises.

Riddle: Based on your anecdote just now, it may be that Stitch here is from a more tropical region.

Stitch: …

Stitch: …Ohana.

Lilia: I get it. There's a certain "someone" you want to share this delicious shaved ice with.

Stitch: Ye.

Lilia: Mhm, I understand that feeling well.

Lilia: The guy who would always ask me to make him frozen desserts was always the same way.

Lilia: It's not that he wanted to eat it because it was delicious. It's more like he wanted to eat it with someone he cared for.

Lilia: I'm the same way. I used to think that whatever I ate didn't matter, so long as it sated my hunger. However…

Lilia: Even those frozen desserts that I never thought would satisfy me would always be the most delicious when I could eat it with him.

Stitch: Yeah.

Lilia: Now that he's more or less stopped throwing his tantrums, I haven't really made him any shaved ice anymore.

Lilia: Maybe once we escape from this island, it may be a good chance to try my hand at it again.

Lilia: Oh, right. You should make this shaved ice for your loved ones as well. I'll give you the recipe.

Stitch: Great!

Riddle: Eating it with people is what makes it delicious, hm.

Riddle: Lilia-senpai, please teach me the recipe as well.

Riddle: I would like to make it for my dormmates who no doubt are fulfilling my duties while I am gone.

Lilia: Well, of course, I'd be happy to. I'll give you a proper lesson on how to make it, too.

Lilia: I'll have to tell them all about my adventures on this island. Kufufu, that's just another thing to look forward to this summer.

Requested by Anonymous.

#twisted wonderland #twst #lilia vanrouge #riddle rosehearts #ace trappola #jack howl #azul ashengrotto #floyd leech #twst lilia #twst riddle #twst ace #twst jack #twst azul #twst floyd #twst grim #twst stitch #twst translation #twst lost in the book with stitch #mention: malleus

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somewhereincairparavel · 26 days

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I like how Jason's reputation amongst the gods kind of cements his character as a dutiful leader. I know most ppl don't like the fact that he's all goody goody, but it really fits his arc well, and i like reading about it. it's one of the things about Jason that Rick didn't fumble. He was consistent with his character being dutiful and noble till the very end and makes it a point to show that through others perception.

Zeus- Okay he's a horrible dad, but he did initially respect his son (before jason opposed him in front of the gods, that kinda warped his ego) even going as far as to saying that he was proud to have him as a son and stuff. Which was a pretty ooc thing for Zeus to do especially to his sons. Too bad it only lasted for a few seconds before he went back to being bitchy.

Hera- Jason changed her perception of demigods, we know Hera hated all demigods bc half of them are sired by her husband, she wanted to use jason as a pawn to Gaia's defeat. But all those times she treated jason as her champion, she ended up actually caring about him and considered him a son. She mourned and cried about Jason MONTHS after he died, even going as far as to yell at her husband for not caring or grieving about the child that HE sired.

Apollo- self explanatory, Jason stood up for Apollo from the very beginning, and ended up dying for his sake, even when didn't have to do that. Jason made Apollo understand to have empathy for humans ("Remember what it's like to be human") and made Apollo stop being so full of himself with his selfless sacrifice. So apollo is the Olympian who has the most amount of respect for Jason. And made sure that Jason's sacrifice would not be in vain.

Artemis- if you go to the official Riordan wiki fanpage for Artemis, it's mentioned that Percy and Jason were two of the only male demigods that she had immense respect for. She mentally thanked Jason for standing up to Zeus for Apollo. Of course, being Thalia's brother could also give jason browny points aswell lol.

Athena- She seemed to respect Jason's wisdom in blood of Olympus, when he told his dad that it was unwise to punish apollo for Gaia's waking. Well know Athena respects anyone who has shown wisdom. She shot Jason a very approving look. So it's nice that Athena, who is very critical and picky, observed that Jason is a well thought out and insightful individual.

Aphrodite- kind of self explanatory too, she called jason a lovely boy in piper's dream, even alluding that jason needed absolutely no physical improvement in his looks aswell. I know this has nothing to do with Jason's dutifulness but Aphrodite can sense a person's heart and nature, and she immediately thought jason was perfect for her daughter even before they started dating. We know how picky Aphrodite is when it comes to who people date lol

Bacchus/Dionysus- We know that Bacchus had somewhat remembered Jason (calling him John green and all lol) because jason had done services for him (something about a leopard, iforgot lol). And annabeth pointed out that it was a good thing that jason and Bacchus were on fairly good terms. So there's that.

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squash1 · 7 months

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An essay on what makes Gansey, Gansey.

Go.

okay. strap in.

in this essay i will examine how, ultimately, what makes gansey, gansey is his experience with death at an early age and how that is fundamentally about a loss of childhood.

to understand what makes gansey, gansey you have to look at gansey’s two lives. gansey was born into a wealthy family — the kind of family that passes down names father to son and has buildings then built in that name. until gansey was 10, we can assume he fit into this affluent world without issue. little gansey was most likely a spoiled little rich kid — not a bad person but inherently out of touch because of the reality he was born into. when gansey dies the first time, it changes his perception of reality — he has an understanding of time and mortality that most adults don’t have never mind ten year olds. this first death is a representation of an early end to gansey’s childhood. he no longer easily fits into the wealthy, laid back world he was born into. we have to assume that until gansey went to stay with mallory, he was in DC with his parents trying to fit into their world but instead feeling intensely isolated and lonely. because even though gansey changed, his parents didn’t.

mallory is an important figure because of the time he represents in gansey’s life. we know from mallory that at 14 gansey struggled intensely with anxiety, that he hadn’t yet learned to present only his shiny gansey mask to the world. but instead of being dismissive, mallory showed gansey kindness and empathy — he was perhaps gansey’s first friend because sometimes delightfully weird old british men are exactly what a teenager needs. mallory helped gansey in his quest, but he also helped him to discover this new version of himself by making him feel not only safe but like there were other people beyond his parent’s world that would understand this pull and fascination he had.

understanding this backstory is key to understanding what makes gansey, gansey, because an intimate knowledge of death is what has produced this gansey that we meet in the raven boys. the gansey we meet is silly and strange and charming. he uses phrases like “hey, tiger” and drinks organic apple juice from the bottle, he has a favorite yellow sweater and is vocal about his love for it. and that’s just gansey, those are ganseyisms as i like to say. gansey has chosen to live his life with childlike wonder and whimsy because he lost that at an early age but doesn’t want to loose it forever. he has decided to embrace the weird, unknown parts of life. he is essentially reclaiming his time. he’s saying yes i know that there is death and darkness in the world, yes i have seen it first hand, yes i still feel it sometimes but i am going to live my life hopefully. gansey has carved out a life for himself in henrietta — a town that in and of itself makes him feel known, but also contains a piece of his old world in aglionby — and has slowly found people who fit, who feel right, who are 1,000 years old just like him. gansey has been lonely for a lot of his life but he found people who were lonely like he was lonely, that were looking for the something more just like he was looking for the something more. he is a compelling leader not because of money or status, but because his hope and quest and belief are real and made real because of gansey’s relationship to mortality. he has made it his mission to build a life he wants, even if it’s short, even if he’s scared. what makes gansey, gansey is his ability to choose hope anyway, to choose to live anyway.

if you made it this far, i love u

#this is exactly the kind of ask i live for thank you anon <3 #I LOVE GANSEY SM GODDDDDD #richard campbell gansey iii #trc #the raven boys #the dream thieves #blue lily lily blue #the raven cycle #the raven king #the gangsey #gangsey #ronan lynch #adam parrish #blue sargent #pynch #adam and ronan #bluesey #mine #ask

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