#this took me longer than i care to admit and it still turned out shitty sdgsdf

[sweaterweatherever]

Christmas Blues (Xavier Thorpe x Reader)

Pairing: Xavier Thorpe x AFAB reader

Summary: In which the reader decides she is going to take Xavier apart to make him forget all about his Christmas blues.

Warnings: Smut. Shitty families. Sub Xavier. Crying. Showering together. (Please, don´t do as the reader and close the taps when you aren't actually showering. Let's not waste water.) Hand jobs. Unprotected vaginal and oral sex. Praise kink. Cum play? (Is that a thing?) AGED UP CHARACTERS. This can be read as a stand alone, but it's kind of a part two to Pretty boy.

Requested: Yes. For the subby crying Xavier anon. Is also the filthiest thing I have ever written.

A/N: To everyone who has a hard time around the holidays, I give you my warmest hug and hope you can find someone like the Reader, who helps take your mind off it. If you have a troubled relationship with a family member, like Xavier or you have lost someone (like me) I hope you find comfort, because I know how hard this time of the year gets.

You had to admit, you were excited about the Christmas break. You normally loved Christmas, being a time of fond memories from your childhood, great food and time spent with your family. And with Xavier. It had become kind of a tradition, you see. The Thorpe's weren’t the most affectionate family, so they didn’t really care where Xavier went for the break. Your mother had decided to take him in when you had mentioned he had nowhere to go in the first year of your friendship.

She had kept inviting him to spend parts of the breaks there because she had loved him. How couldn’t she? Xavier was charming when he wanted to be, and cared deeply about you. That was enough to win her over. This year, though. This year was the first year you were going to be together on break as a couple. Your mother wasn’t going to get home until the 24, being away on a business trip. She trusted you enough to leave you to your own devices, still convinced no funny business was going on between the two of you. This idea was, of course, aided by you. You had conveniently forgotten to mention you were now more than best friends, knowing she would never allow you to be on your own then.

“So, here we are.” You said, paying the cab driver and looking desperately for your keys in your purse, while Xavier took your luggage. The journey had been long and exhausting, but you were in a good mood.

“I still can’t believe you didn’t tell her.” Xavier holds the door for you, allowing you to pass first and disable the alarm. “She is going to kill us when she finds out.”

“If I told her, we wouldn't have the house to ourselves.” You answered, turning on the lights. The sight of your childhood home made you smile. Your mom had put up an artificial tree before leaving, but had left it bare, with the boxes you knew contained the ornaments beneath it. You would have fun decorating, that’s for sure. “You can’t say how much you disapprove later, when I’m sucking your dick in the shower.” You gave him a blinding smile.

“Oh my god.” Xavier said, looking scandalized, both at the crude words and your nonchalance. “Get me dinner first, at least.” You burst out laughing, and he was unable to contain himself any longer, laughing along with you. “You are a terrible influence.” Xavier stepped closer to you, hugging you from behind. You loved it, he was warm and smelled nicer than usual, having docked the clothes he used to paint and choosing to wear something more appropriate for traveling. The ever present smelt of turpentine was much fainter than normally.

“I know.” You pulled him for a kiss, turning your neck slightly. He looked cute in his winter coat, you couldn’t help it. "So, shower, or dinner first?” You asked.

“Depends. If we are showering together, shower first.” He said, lightly trailing his hands along your ribs and making you squirm. Xavier knew you were ticklish, and often took advantage of it.

“Shower then.” You said, watching him go upstairs, luggage forgotten. “Oh, I hate to see you go, but I love to watch you leave.” You shamelessly eyed him as you walked behind him. You might have been teasing, but a plan had already started to form in your head. Holidays were tough on him, filled with bad memories and the longing for a loving family. You wanted to keep him distracted, so the tortured part of the tortured artist didn’t turn too literal. You had an empty house, and you were on break… Maybe you could finally take him apart, which you had been unable to do at Nevermore, the lack of time and space getting in your way. Your reasons weren’t only selfless, though. You wanted to make him cry so badly. You betted he would fall apart beautifully.

You had had exactly one awkward conversation about his sex life with Bianca, back when you only were best friends. From what you remembered, he found it hard to let go fully during sex, not trusting her enough. You had both been drunk, and you wanted to avoid keeping talking about it because you had been pinning for him back then. But you could tell he found it hard still.

“Xavi?” You said, opening the door to the bathroom. He was facing the shower, busy with getting the water at exactly the right temperature. He had taken his coat off. You took out some towels, placing them on a counter near the shower. You also took out a tiny towel because tile floors were hard on the knees, damn it.

“Y/N.” Xavier said, turning to face you. He pulled you in for a kiss, stroking your hair gently. He gave a tug at your sweater. “Let’s get you out of this.” You stopped him before he could take it from you, holding his face between your hands. His pretty eyes peered at you, confused.

“Xavi… I wanna try something." You said, taking his hoodie off. “I want to take care of you tonight.”

“You always take care of me.” Xavier answered, with a puzzled expression, helping you get his shirt off too. You kneeled in front of him, unbuckling his belt. “Oh. Oh.” He said, finally getting it. “I guess… If you'd like to.”

You took his pants and underwear next, gently rubbing his thighs to make sure he wasn’t cold. He was half hard already. You smiled, teasingly.

“What?” He asked, not an ounce of shame. “I got a pretty girl kneeling right in front of me, unbuckling my belt and stroking my thighs. Besides, with you, it’s almost Pavlovian.”

You got up, pressing a kiss to his lips. You kept it short and sweet, not wanting to get him too excited. “Get in, we are wasting water. I'll be right behind you.”

He gave you a long, disapproving look, but obeyed. You started taking your clothes off, focused on efficiency. You quickly entered the shower, watching as Xavier was already in the process of washing himself and unaware of your entrance. Once inside, you took a moment to drink in the sight before you. His tall form, long lean body, glistening from the water. Hair sticking to his shoulders and looking darker, eyes closed in relaxation. You placed a hand on his back, careful not to spook him.

“Hey.” Xavier pulled you for a hug, naked wet body pressing against yours. This way, you were both under the spray of the shower. “You are cold.” He tilted your head slightly backwards, so your hair got soaked too. He took the shower gel, and rubbed it on his hands, making some foam.

“Xavi, give me that.” You said, taking the shower gel from him. “Can I wash you?”

“Sure. You can try, but I think it won’t work.” He gestured to the air above your head, referencing your height difference. Xavier was right, you were several inches shorter than him, which made it harder, but not impossible.

“You underestimate me.” You passed a sponge with a bit of shower gel over his chest, slowly making your way down his body. You stopped when you got to his hips, noticing Xavier had been getting harder by the minute. “I love that you are so sensitive.” You said, but did nothing about it. Xavier was getting flustered, either at your comment or actions. You washed his erection in a completely perfunctory way, barely touching him. You went to your knees in front of him and kept on washing him.

“Y/N!” He whined. You gave him a blinding smile. “Do something.”

“I am doing something, you silly. I’m helping you get showered." You got back on your feet, and gestured to him to turn around. He obeyed, still grumbling. You eyed his shoulders and neck. Now that would be a challenge. You got started at his legs, making your way upwards and noting with interest how goosebumps formed on the skin you touched. When you had him all lathered in soap, except from his shoulders and neck, you pushed him gently under the spray. Xavier tried to grab the sponge from you, probably to return the favor, but you stepped away, cleaning yourself quickly and joining him on the spray as fast as you could. Then, you extend a hand outside the shower, grabbing at the towel you had left nearby just for this reason. “Sit down, Xavi.”

“Like in the towel?” He asked you with an amused smile, but obeyed, long legs sprawling on the shower floor. You climbed on his lap, completely naked and holding shampoo and conditioner. “This is so unfair.” Xavier complained, feeling the way your pussy was resting against his erection. You would only have to align him, and he could be thrusting inside you. But you didn’t, choosing instead to start massaging the shampoo on his hair. His expression immediately changed, eyes closing in bliss. Xavier was such a puppy, you thought, filled with affection, a touch to his hair and he melted. You washed his hair, being extra gentle and massaging more than necessary to get him as relaxed as you could. Xavier kept quiet, only giving slight noises of happiness sporadically.

Then, you applied the conditioner, letting it sit while you washed your hair. Carefully, very carefully, you detangled his hair. He kept his eyes closed the whole time, head laying against the tile, arms around your waist. You applied conditioner to your hair and got up, offering him a hand.

“Come on, babe, time to get up. “ Xavier slowly opened his eyes, a calm, happy expression you hadn’t seen in days taking over his face. The holidays were hard on him, you knew. But you hadn’t realized how bad it had gotten recently. Guilt curled in your stomach, and the resolve finally settled. Tonight, you were going to make sure he forgot all about it.

You helped him get up, rinsing his hair and your own. Then, you wrapped him in a towel and sat him down on the toilet. You quickly dried yourself, and got out the hairdryer, using it to dry his hair. The look on his face made you giggle. With his hair wet, he looked like a disgruntled kitten.

“You are so cute.” You said to him, brushing your hands through his hair. He didn’t acknowledge what you were saying, his eyes closed once again. Good. You were getting somewhere.

You did quick work of your hair, drying it enough to braid it, still wet.

“Xavi.” You said, touching his back gently. “You can go to the bedroom and wait for me there while I pick this up. Don’t get dressed.”

“I can help you.” He pouted, and you couldn’t help but kiss him because he looked too cute. “ I’m serious, you have been doing all the work and I…”

“You are doing perfectly.” You said, stroking his jaw gently. “So, because you want to keep being good, you will do as I say.”

Xavier’s eyes widened, and a blush took over his pretty face. He seemed to be realizing exactly how the night would go.

“Yeah… I’ll… I’ll do that.” He stammered and walked out of the bathroom. You wrapped yourself in a robe. You did quick work of the towels and clothes, carrying them to the first floor and taking advantage of the opportunity to take out a frozen pizza and turn up the heating. When you got back to your bedroom, you found Xavier laying down, covered by the sheets, and messing with your phone. The reason became apparent when some song began to play. You grabbed some of your lotion from your vanity and padded, dropping the robe along the way, towards him.

“Hey. “ You said, sliding under the sheets next to him. Xavier smelt like you, having used your shampoo and conditioner. You pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “Can I give you a massage?”

“Sure.” He put your phone down and looked at you. “How do you want me?”

“Stay on your back.” You answered, and climbed once again on top of his hips. You drew him into a kiss, slowly turning it more heated. Then, you put some lotion on your hands and warmed it up, applying it to his chest with gentle motions. You made sure to rub at his nipples, making him give a startled gasp. You kept on kissing him, pretending nothing was happening. You lightly ran your nails down his stomach, making him buckle under your touch. Afraid of falling off the bed and killing the mood, you tensed your thighs against his hips.

“You said you were going to give me a massage.” Xavier broke the kiss, looking at you with accusatory eyes.

“Oh, but I am.” You pressed a kiss to his jaw, making your way to his ear, hands still running down his torso. Then, you ran your tongue along the shell of his ear. At that, Xavier gave a full-body shiver.

“Come on, please. Don't tease.”

“I’m not teasing.” You kept going, kissing his neck and sucking a hickey in his collarbone. Your hands kept going down too, eventually getting between your thighs and grabbing his half hard cock.

“You are evil.” Xavier said, screwing his eyes shut. “Pure evil.”

“Oh, but Xavier, I am only giving you a massage. “ You smirked, giving a few pumps at what now was an erection. The lotion in your hands made the glide easier, and Xavier seemed to like it because his hips were practically fucking your fist. “Come on, babe, open your eyes. You are only getting a massage, it’s no big deal.”

“Oh god, I hate you.” He said, throwing an arm over his face.

“You don’t. Now be a good boy and open those eyes for me.” You added more steel to your voice. “If you don’t obey me, I will stop.”

At the threat, his eyes immediately opened.

“There's my good boy!” You coed, chucking his chin. Xavier gave you an annoyed eye roll.

“Are we going to get on with it?” He whined.

“Oh, Xavi, you are such a brat. “ You started pumping his length with a more purposeful rhythm. You had a plan, after all. You pulled away a little, sitting on his thighs to have a better view. His eyes almost scrunched closed a few times, a frown on his face from the effort and concentration to keep them open. His breath was more erratic, a drop of sweat making its way down the hollow of his throat. Xavier’s thrusting got more desperate, buckling under you. He started moaning, and you suppressed a smile. You loved him, but god, Xavier was loud. “Close, pretty boy?” You asked, without really wanting confirmation. You knew his tells. His hands were already gripping your thighs hard enough to hurt, and the endearment only made his grip harder.

“Yeah.” Xavier had a pinched expression, lips tight and clearly trying to hold his moans.

“You can be as loud as you want, baby. We are alone.” You said, caressing his jaw.

“Y/N!” His back arched, long neck making a perfect curve and looking good enough to bite. He was on the brink of his orgasm, so of course, that’s when you stopped.

“What the fuck?!” Xavier took you off his lap, angrily, and dropped you on the bed. Something stirred in you at the casual show of strength, but you saved the thought for later.

“Now, that was rude.” You answered, without a care in the world.

“Rude was what you did to me, I was about to…” But Xavier seemed unable to say the word, choosing instead to tear at his hair dramatically. “You are a tease.” He accused.

“About to what?” You asked, sweetly. “Come on, Xavi, you know the word. Come, orgasm, the big O, climax.” Xavier stared at you, mouth hanging open.

“I can't believe you. You are an asshole.” He said instead.

“Oh, I’m so sad. Why don’t I let you fuck my throat as an apology?” You asked, peering at him innocently from beneath your lashes. Xavier eyed you suspiciously. He knew you were up to something, but he liked fucking your throat so much, it was clouding his judgement. “I’m serious, come on, get up. I’ll sit on the edge of the bed.”

Xavier did as you said, still with suspicion in his eyes.

“Come on, pretty boy.” You said, taking him in your hand and giving him a lazy lick from root to tip. You took the head in your mouth, lapping at the slit, and making a face at the taste of the lotion on his skin. It was messy, you licking at him sloppily, knowing the saliva would help later.

Xavier’s hand stroked your temple, looking at you with eyes full of love and the dopey expression he got when you gave him head. You suppressed a snicker, knowing he was absolutely lost on what was going to take place next. Slowly, and doing your best not to gag, you took him all the way in. It was not an easy task, Xavier had both length and thickness on his side, and it made your jaw ache, and your eyes filled with tears. You kept repeating like a mantra in your head, “Breath through your nose.” When you finally got him all the way inside, nose brushing against his pubes and Xavier looking like he had just seen god, you braced yourself and pinched his thigh.

Xavier gave a startled yelp, followed by a moan when the pinch made him thrust inside your mouth. You grabbed one of his hands, placed it in your head, and used his ass to hold yourself. You gave him a look, ordering without words to get started.

And so, he did, hesitantly, pulling in and out so slowly he might as well have been auditioning for a slow motion scene in a porno. You pinched his tight once more and this time, he actually screamed, buckling in your throat. You snickered.

“Can you stop pinching me?” Xavier asked. You gave him a look that you hoped conveyed your displeasure and moved up and down over his length faster, hoping he caught your meaning. “You want…” He said, a little winded. “You want me…” He cut out with a moan, and you rolled your eyes, stopping the motion. “To fuck you harder?” Xavier asked. You nodded emphatically.

“Right.” He said, grabbing your head more firmly and started thrusting earnestly. You gave him a smile, showing pointy canines, dangerously close to his cock. He kept eye contact with you, growing more confident by the minute. When he started to get too confident he was going to come, moans getting louder and louder, you pulled away.

“Fuck.” Xavier sat down on the bed next to you. He was too much of a gentleman to chase your mouth, and too afraid of overstepping or hurting you. “Okay, I'll bite. What do you want?” He pleaded, looking at you with desperate eyes. His fists were clenched, whole face contorted into an ode to frustration.

“You have an interesting reaction to being teased.” You answered, dropping onto his lap once again. Your thighs were wet with how turned on you were. You weren’t a sadist, but the way Xavier looked when he was just on the edge was the prettiest thing you had ever seen, and you were a sucker for pretty things. “I like it. “ You rolled your hips against him, feeling how hard he was, teasing your clit with his tip and barely suppressing a moan of your own.

“Please, please, just let me fuck you.” Xavier begged, one hand going to your breasts, flickering your nipple with his thumb. “I'll make you feel so good, baby, I swear.”

“Oh, I like the sound of that.” He perked up at your voice, seeing the chance to come.

“Come on, please, baby, let me fuck you, come on…” Xavier begged.

You ground your hips against his cock, giving a low moan.

“Please, you are so wet, I can tell. Please, babe, let me make you feel good…” He begged, voice sounding broken. He was close again, you could tell.

“You are my pretty boy, you know it, right?” You asked, exploiting the vulnerability he was letting show. You knew it wasn’t an easy thing for him… “I love you. You are my partner, my best friend, the best human on earth. You are pretty inside and out.” Your hips sped up, and you noticed how Xavier kept trying to turn his head. You grabbed his cheeks, forcing him to keep eye contact with you. Were his eyes wet? “I love you. I will always have your back, even when no one else has. You are mine, Xavier. I’m not letting go.”

Just as he was about to come, you lifted your hips, evading his thrusts. He gave a frustrated yell, and his eyes filled with tears. You smirked, and felt tempted to make a victory dance. Instead, you kissed him. His tears kept falling, confused little sobs getting swallowed by you greedily.

“Oh, Xavi.” You said, pushing him inside you. “You are a pretty crier.” He really was. His eyes and nose got slightly red, eyelashes looked even longer, green eyes bright.

“Please," He begged, and the look on his face was priceless. Xavier looked lost, completely overwhelmed; you could tell he needed an anchor. So, that's what you became.

“Xavi, Xavi, my good, pretty boy.” You bounced on his dick, harder, forcing him to focus on you, and not to get caught inside his head. “You are being so good, you look so beautiful. Let go, I got you.” You clenched around him, and because he was such a good, pretty boy, he obeyed, coming with a shout and eyes filled with tears. You wished you had a way to capture his expression forever, already knowing it would haunt you. But you didn't say anything, letting yourself fall over his chest. His arms hugged you, his softening erection still inside of you.

“You didn't come.” Xavier said, after what felt like an eternity. One of his hands went to the end of your braid, starting to take it apart.

“It doesn't matter. This wasn't about me.” You burrowed your face in his neck, pressing a kiss there.

“It matters to me.” Xavier said, hands slowly making their way to your core.

“Xavier…” You whined. “I want to cuddle and get some food into you. I don't need it.”

“But I want to.” Xavier ran a finger lightly over your back, and you shivered. You were aroused, that was certain, but you knew it would go away. Taking care of him was more important.

“You are messing with my aftercare.” You settled for that, instead of admitting your thoughts, knowing if you told him, there wouldn't be convincing him otherwise.

Xavier stayed quiet.

“Thank you,” He finally said, pressing a kiss to the top of your hair. “I know what you were doing, and it helped. But I want to thank you like this. Let me? Please?”

“Fine.” You grumbled. You weren't as aroused as before, but wetness was still pooling between your thighs. Part of it was Xavier's cum, part your wetness. “But I'm going to put something in the oven, you have until it is ready.”

You got up, wincing when you felt it drip down from you. You went to grab your bathrobe, deciding to sacrifice it for the greater good, but Xavier stopped you.

“Don't clean yourself up. I like you like this.” You blushed, suddenly self-conscious of your naked body. You put the robe on, and went to put the pizza in the oven, setting a timer.

“Twenty minutes.” You said when you got back. Xavier was sitting on the bed, looking tired. “We can just cuddle.”

“No way.” He said, gesturing for you to lay down. “I bet I can get you to come in less time.” Xavier laid down in his stomach and hooked one of your legs over his shoulders. He wasted no time in getting started, lapping up at your hole, eagerly eating you out. The thought of him, cleaning you up without any care for the fact he was drinking his own cum, shouldn't be as hot as it was.

“Xavier.” You begged, pulling his hair.

“Shhh.” He took your clit inside his mouth, sucking at it. He placed two of his fingers inside you and scissored them, before he started fucking you with his tongue. You were close already, and it only took a couple of circles drawn gently around your clit to tip you over the edge. You moaned weakly.

Xavier dragged himself upwards, pressing a kiss to your lips. He smelled like you and him combined. You eagerly kissed him back, groaning when you felt him smile smugly.

“I told you I could get you to come before the timer went off.” You rolled your eyes.

“You are so smug.” You complained, pushing him a little. “Anyway, these sheets are ruined, but there's pizza downstairs.” You tempted him.

“Have I told you how much I love you?” Xavier asked, cupping your face between his hands. “Because I do.” Then, just as the little kid he still was at heart, he got up and jogged out of the bedroom. “Race you to the kitchen!”

You got up, hurrying behind him. Happy that he wasn't thinking about his shitty home life and instead, only thoughts of pizza, and you remained.

#wednesday tv show #xavier thorpe x reader #wednesday netflix #xavier x you #xavier thorpe x fem!reader #xavier thorpe smut #xavier thorpe #xavier x y/n #wednesday 2022 #wednesday #my writing #xavier thorpe imagine

[babytarttdoodoo]

fresh concrete in my mouth

((Winner of Whumptober Poll #1 | Day 3 | “Make it stop.”)) 

The door opened and Roy ignored it. Either it was Beard, who knew better than to say something, or Nate, who wouldn’t know how to say something, or it was someone who wouldn’t think to look for him on the floor behind his desk.

“Coach?”

Roy groaned, louder than intended. Because of course it was Jamie Fucking Tartt.

Sure enough, a mop of blonde hair invaded Roy’s view of the ceiling tiles as Jamie bounded around the desk, still full of energy after a full day of training.

Prick.

Jamie’s brow scrunched up in confusion as he took in the sight of Roy sat against his own desk drawers, legs stretched out in front of him. “What you doing down there?”

“None of your fucking business,” Roy grit out, annoyed enough already without stupid questions making it worse. “What do you want?”

Jamie’s nose wrinkled, adding to the overall scrunchyness of his face. “I were just wondering what your dinner plans are. You alright?”

“Do I look alright?” Roy snapped, frustration hot in his chest, and immediately regretted it when Jamie’s expression blanked and he held up his hands.

“Okay, okay, don’t got to bite my head off,” he chided, edging around Roy like he was keeping his distance from a wild animal. It was almost funny, that he thought Roy had a hope in hell of being able to reach him if he lashed out right now.

Except for all the ways it wasn’t funny at all.

Roy sighed, guilt cloying his throat as much as the pain. “Right. I don’t have dinner plans but I’m going to be here a while.”

“Okay…” Jamie drew the word out, head bobbing from side to side. “Why?”

“Because my knee fucking hurts!” It burst out of him without permission: too loud, too angry. But once it was out, Roy didn’t want to take it back, the words flowing through a wrecked dam of pride. “It fucking hurts, and it always fucking hurts, but apparently I can’t even stand still at the side of a bloody pitch in shitty weather without it fucking..."

He snarled wordlessly, gesturing at the offending limb in an attempt to encapsulate the throbbing, sickening, familiar sensation of pain that had sent him to the floor in desperation.

“And if it isn’t fucked because of the shitty fucking rain, it’s swollen from the heat because it’s shitting summer and everything’s awful and I can’t do this.”

His voice had risen to a shout and the silence became another entity in the room as he panted from the effort and Jamie stared.

Roy dug the heels of his hands into his eyes until stars burst into the darkness behind his lids. He tried to breathe through the inarticulate rage and helplessness that threatened to drag him under.

"I just want it to fucking stop hurting," he admitted quietly, as much to himself as to Jamie. “It never bloody stops.”

He gentled the pressure of his hands but didn’t drop them, still hiding his face behind his fingers so he didn’t have to see whatever stupid expression Jamie had conjured up in the name of empathy.

Though, it was quiet for longer than he expected. Instead of speaking, Jamie moved around quietly and there was a nearby rustle of clothes before Roy felt him settle in against his side, pressed up next to him on the floor.

“I don’t think saying ‘sorry’ is going to help much,” Jamie finally voiced, subdued and so careful that Roy was obligated to give him proper attention. He turned to look at him, blinking the haze from his vision.

Jamie’s eyes were fixed across the room, his mouth downturned and brow furrowed. He was so expressive, all the time, and Roy still found him so incredibly difficult to read.

“Not sure anything I say can help much. I don’t know what you’re going through.” He shrugged a little, as though that simple admission didn’t strike through Roy with all the precision of a scalpel. “But we’re here for you, mate. You’ve got good people around you.” He nudged him with his elbow and slid his eyes across to meet Roy’s. “You’ve got me, coach. Whatever you need.”

Roy didn’t know what to do with his soft smile. With being gently given permission to feel the way he did.

And worse, whatever Jamie saw in his face prompted him to continue.

“You’re allowed to be human, Roy.”

“Fuck.” Roy choked on a sob that punched out of him, unbidden, and slammed a hand across his mouth.

His knee still ached. But the sensation of a warm arm around his shoulders was familiar too.

#whumptober2023 #no.3 #make it stop #ted lasso #fic #chronic pain #whump vote result #roy kent #jamie tartt #my fic #fic: fresh concrete

[yuriko-mukami]

His Possession After Story

Beta reader: @ruki-mukami-dl

Yuriko pushed a teacup right under Yuuto’s nose while he was going through papers. She sat down next to him, glancing at the documents. The kitchen was even smaller than she had shared with their father after moving to Kaminashi City. But it was enough for one person who wasn’t too fond of cooking anyway, and it had all the necessities. For that, Yuriko had made sure when they had checked out the options… which have been very few.

“The apartment looks nice. It’s tiny but I think it works well… and it isn’t too far from the manor.” Yuriko took a sip from her tea. “And it’s nice that we found some furniture for you as well.”

Finally, Yuuto lifted his gaze and left the papers on the tiny kitchen table. Sighing, he only swung the spoon in his cup. “You sure you don’t wanna move in with me? We could check out bigger options…”

Hastily, Yuriko shook her head, making her white curls dance around her face and tickle her cheeks. “I want to live with Ruki, Yuuto.”

“You know, it’s not okay for an unmarried girl of your age to live with four males… And they’re freakin’ bloodsuckers too.” Yuuto frowned. He had done that so often recently that Yuriko feared he would get permanent wrinkles on his forehead soon. 

And Ruki wasn’t any better with the matter. He kept frowning and glaring at Yuuto in whatever chance he got. Neither of them was openly hostile toward the other but it was more than clear that they didn’t enjoy staying in the same space longer than necessary. Other than that, Ruki’s brothers were giving Yuriko a headache with their nasty comments… and Yuuto was even ruder than them at times. 

Putting her hand over Yuuto’s, Yuriko tried to smile. “I’m happy like this. They don’t do anything to me, I promise. Ruki treats me well.”

At least mostly. Yuriko had to admit that they had had the lowest of the low moments, but she wasn’t going to tell about those Yuuto who — luckily — couldn’t read her thoughts anymore now, that they were in their human forms in the Human World. So, finally, Yuriko’s secrets were truly safe as long as she wouldn’t visit Yuuto’s dream space again.

“Hmph, I doubt ‘bout that… I still remember how shitty you looked as a fox that one time…” Yuuto gave Yuriko a glare. “You know that your dream form reflects the reality.”

“We had our struggles…” Yuriko nibbled her bottom lip. “...every couple has those. And… and… besides… It’s my decision. Ruki has really shown me how it feels to be wanted and cared for… No one before him…”

“I always wanted my sister…”

Yuuto’s gaze almost broke Yuriko’s heart. She had hit him in a sore spot even though she hadn’t meant that. She patted his hand again. “And I want my big brother. But I also want this… this… love. Yuuto, I truly love Ruki. Please… don’t take this away from me. After losing so much I need this one thing I can’t ever lose. And I still need my brother, too. I need you both.”

“Haa… dammit… Fine. I’m gonna live here on my own then.” Yuuto tapped the paper with a floor plan of a single-room flat. Yuriko had helped him to search for it, and it hadn’t been such an easy task as she had imagined. It turned out that not many landlords were ready to rent out a place for a single male who was still trying to find his way to earn his living without a proper education and family contacts. “I guess I should be happy that you have a nice roof above your head.”

“Umh! Exactly!” Yuriko flashed a smile. “Be happy about that. And I’ll visit you often. We’ll get everything working for you. I know how to do household chores and such, so it’s not a problem at all.”

“You ain’t doin’ my chores for me, gotcha? You’re gonna teach me a little bit of cookin’ and how to wash clothes. All other thingies I can manage on my own.” Yuuto poked Yuriko on her forehead. “You gotta worry ‘bout your school, not me. I heard that you failed your third year. Dontcha do that again.”

Yuriko nodded. She took another sip from her tea which was already getting cold. Maybe life could be good now when things were finally settling down. They had been through chaos and there was still renovation going on in Yuma’s room since he had set it on fire for a reason Yuriko hadn’t quite understood. But what she did know, was that Eve had gone back to the Sakamaki family. That must mean Nalia had kept her promise, and Yuriko should thank the woman later for that.

“Your midterms didn’t go too well, right?” Yuuto continued, making Yuriko hang her head.

“I… I… because of… everything…” The wave of sadness washed over Yuriko again, squeezing her heart into a tiny black rock. She lifted her hand and wiped under her eyes, shaking her head slightly. Would she ever be completely happy again? Or would this lingering anxiety always travel with her wherever she would go? There was an empty spot in her as if something had been ripped off for good.

“Sis…”

Whatever Yuuto was about to say, Yuriko never heard it because footsteps from the entrance caught her interest. A wafting familiar scent sailed into the kitchen just a moment before Ruki walked in, giving Yuuto a glare once more. The invisible daggers threw in the air between the two males, but this time Yuriko didn’t even bother to try to soothe the situation.

“Yuriko, we have a visitor at the manor. You need to come with me.” Ruki took Yuriko’s hand and pulled her off the chair. “I am sure you have a lot to do here, Yuuto.”

Still staring at the Vampire, Yuuto nodded with a slow movement. “That’s right. But you better take good care of her, gotcha?”

“You do not need to worry about that. Yuriko’s safety and wellbeing is my first priority.”

Ruki’s words made Yuuto snort, but he didn’t try to deny them as Yuriko laid a pleading gaze at him and shook her head.

“I’ll visit you later again… and then we can cook something simple together. I put some meals in the fridge, so you can just warm them up before that.” Yuriko smiled.

Another nod, accompanied by a frown. “See you later, Sis.”

With that, Ruki wrapped his arm better around Yuriko. The air swooshed around them when he teleported them directly into the living room of the Mukami manor. There was a tall man waiting for them there, and Yuriko couldn’t quite hide her gasp. She had never seen so long and smooth white hair with a very slight pinkish tone hair on anyone. Other than that, the man had been dressed in something that she could only call extravagant. 

The man had a kind expression but still, a chill crept down Yuriko’s spine. She inhaled deeply, trying to figure out more. There was a strong scent of a Vampire around the man but something else too. Something ageless Yuriko hadn’t smelled ever before. She couldn’t describe the scent or compare it to anything, but it was captivating.

“So, Ruki, this is the young woman who you have taken an interest in?” As the man spoke, his voice was so soft it almost embraced Yuriko’s ears but also creeped her out. Yet, she didn’t have time to focus on the cold shivers running all over her, since the man took her hand, lifted it, and kissed it without really touching her skin with his lips. “Tsukino Yuriko, I assume?”

“Umh… yes… Yes, I am.” Yuriko hurried a bow which was difficult because the man was still holding her hand as his prisoner. 

“Yuriko, meet Karlheinz-sama.” Ruki put his hand back on Yuriko’s waist at the same moment, the Vampire king finally released her.

“Oh my…!” Yuriko bowed again, this time deeper. “I’m truly sorry. I didn’t realize who you were, Karlheinz-sama! It’s an honor to meet you.”

“Raise your head, my dear.” 

Yuriko peeked, straightening up slowly. She realized that Karlheinz had golden eyes like Shin, pretty close to the amber color both Yuuto and she had too. An interesting detail, for sure. Perhaps this man was something like the Founders, being the king and all.

“I wonder what is so special in you that Ruki’s focus has been wavering.” Karlheinz rubbed his chin with a smirk on his lips while gazing at Yuriko from head to toe and making her squirm. “He has good tastes, I do admit that, but I have never taken him for a man who would put value only on such superficial things as someone’s appearance. So, perhaps it is your mind that has imprisoned him. Either way, it has compromised his ability to concentrate on the tasks I have given him.”

“Oh… umh… I’m sorry…”

“I do apologize, Karlheinz-sama.” Ruki squeezed Yuriko’s waist slightly. “I know I failed to protect the manor and my brother while I was helping Yuriko. But I assure you that from now on, I will keep everything in check. There will not be such slips anymore.” Ruki lowered his head. “But I will accept my punishment for my failure.”

Yuriko covered her mouth with her hand to prevent a gasp from getting out. Would Karlheinz really punish Ruki just because he had been away when Yuma had burned his room? Was this because Eve had left them? Then it would be all Yuriko’s fault since she had put Nalia to spread the word.

“Be at ease, Ruki.” Karlheinz chuckled. “This time everything is going as it should be. I could not predict this little new factor though…” He leaned closer, grabbing Yuriko’s chin and lifting it. He turned her head from left to right and back again while heat coursed up her cheeks. “Time is a peculiar thing, Ruki. Playing it can sometimes cause discursions you did not expect. Yet I am willing to see where this little anomaly will lead us since she does not seem to endanger the plan for playing out.”

Karlheinz smiled, releasing Yuriko once again. “You, my dear, do not worry, for nothing you have done has caused problems. If anything, you have played the game like one of the pawns of my own.”

Yuriko blinked. She had no idea what the Vampire king was talking about. Everything that came out of his mouth sounded cryptic. “I… I… well, then… I’m simply grateful if I can share my life with Ruki.”

“Is that so?” Karlheinz’s gaze didn’t leave Yuriko for a moment. She was imprisoned in the golden cage of his eyes, while she could feel Ruki shifting next to her. “That is still to be decided. I would wish to have a conversation with you in private. Perhaps we can find common ground. Would you join me in Ruki’s study?”

Yuriko glanced at Ruki whose face was unreadable. Yet, she could smell something in the air… displease? Fear? Something else?

“I… I… I think you can say whatever it is in front of Ruki. I keep no secrets from him.” Yuriko swallowed, hoping she wasn’t breaking any vampiric royal rules.

“Very well then. I was wondering what your intentions toward Ruki are exactly. From what I have heard, my other son had been quite fond of you too.”

Yuriko blinked as the heat coursed up her cheeks. She lowered her head, taking a deep breath. “I… Well… With all due respect, I wish not to talk about Sakamaki Laito-san and I would not like to meet him anymore. I have devoted myself to Ruki and I want to stay living with him.”

“And you think you have the power to hold the heart of a Vampire?” Karlheinz’s voice was soft, radiating curiosity. 

Yuriko peeked at the man in front of her. “That is not for me to decide. But if Ruki is willing to have me, then I wish to stay.”

“I see. You are quite a determined one.” Karlheinz shifted, turning his gaze to Ruki. “Adam and Eve have found each other and formed the bond as I wished. The plan is on the move, but I will need all my sons to protect it. But as I said, this anomaly has not disturbed the flow of time, so I will see if things finally play out correctly now that she has joined my playboard. Yet, don’t waver anymore, for I do not wish to remove my pawns.”

“Thank you, Karlheinz-sama.” Ruki bowed to the man. “I will see that my brothers and I will serve you as well as we can. Though, if I may say it would be easier not to waver if I would not need to worry over Yuriko’s safety at the school.”

The silence spread through the living room, and for a moment, Yuriko thought that Ruki had overstepped. Then the glimmering amusement started to grow on Karlheinz’s face as if he had waited this all along. He chuckled as his eyes curled into crescents for a moment.

“I see. That is very bold of you, Ruki. Curious, how this young woman can make you surpass limits you have surrounded yourself with on your own.” Karlheinz nodded. “There will be no more disturbance from Laito. And for that, I expect your complete faithfulness.”

Ruki lowered his head again. “I would not give you anything less, Karlheinz-sama.”

Hastily, Yuriko bowed as well, hiding her smile. “I thank you, Karlheinz-sama. I will stay by Ruki’s side and help him whenever I can.”

The manor was silent. Yuriko lay in Ruki’s arms, on his chest in his bedroom. There was an emptiness in her that refused to go away. Yuuto was living in the Human World now; they would have years together once things had settled down… but… their father had left the city. Yuriko had no idea where he had gone and what kind of life he was about to lead from now.

That felt so final. Yuriko truly had lost her father… if she ever had one. And when it came to her mother, had Hisoka ever been there for her? Yes, they had had their moments. Yuriko would never forget how they had visited a huge Inari shrine together and Hisoka had bought her a fox plushie she still had. It was one of her fondest childhood memories. But the truth was that most of the time Hisoka had been trapped inside her own head, not minding if Yuriko had been properly clothed or fed.

And then… Hisoka had gone after Yuuto. Both of their parents have always wanted Yuuto but not Yuriko. Yet, she missed them. It was like… she had missed them for her whole life and now they both were gone, never giving her another chance.

“Penny for your thoughts, my angel?” Ruki brushed through Yuriko’s hair, pressing her head even closer.

Yuriko couldn’t hide the trembling that coursed somewhere deep within her. “Umh… I feel so alone… Kind of like my parents just abandoned me…”

Ruki’s sigh caressed Yuriko’s cheek. “I know how you feel.” He tensed while holding her as if he was suddenly experiencing something unpleasant. “When I was much younger than you… I woke up one morning and my mother had gone, leaving us for another man. Then my father… I found him, hanging from a tree. The servants did whatever they wanted, and soon, I was living in the streets, wanting to die, too. But I was taken to an orphanage where I met my brothers… and eventually, one thing led to another, allowing us to meet Karlheinz-sama who turned us into Vampires.”

Nuzzling Ruki’s shoulder, Yuriko listened to his words. She had had a hunch that there was more in his background than he had let out before. And somehow, it was more soothing to focus on his story than her own.

“Karlheinz-sama is a great man who saved me. I would not dare to call him father… but I guess it is safe to say that I do see him as a father figure.” Ruki brushed Yuriko’s cheek before taking her chin and lifting it. “I know he cannot be the same for you. Neither can I. But, Yuriko, you are not alone, for your master will always be here for you. Never forget that.”

“Yes… you’re right. I’m sorry for saying it, Ruki…” Yuriko sighed. The last thing she wanted was to hurt Ruki’s feelings.

“Haa… you do not need to apologize.” Ruki locked his gaze with Yuriko’s. “All I am saying is that you should trust yourself in my care. I know it will not take the sorrow away…” Ruki clenched his free fist. “...but knowing that you are not alone, that you have a new family… It can give you a purpose and a place in this world.”

Yuriko nodded, closing her eyes for a moment. Ruki was right. No matter what her parents had done or where they had gone, Yuriko had a family now. She had her big brother and the Mukamis. She wasn’t alone.

And perhaps, the family was not about the blood but about the love. True happiness came with the choices of the heart, not only with something that had been given at birth. 

“Ruki… I’m sorry what happened to you. It sounds terrible. But thank you for telling me. While I find that story sad, it soothes my heart that you can truly understand me…” Yuriko inched closer. “Being with you makes me happy… I simply need more time to… I don’t know… Find me again?”

“And I will be by your side every second of it.” Ruki pressed his palm against the back of Yuriko’s head. “Together, we can find you again.”

Ruki’s words made Yuriko sigh. She wanted to believe it was possible. To find peace and happiness. To be the whole her. Though she wasn’t sure if she had ever been that. Perhaps, her travels were only beginning, for so long she had tried to be the girl everyone else wished her to be.

But who was the real Yuriko? 

The answer was still hidden. One day, Yuriko could tell everyone but right now, she was as puzzled as the rest of the world. Yet, she knew one thing: she had come home. 

But… Right now, Yuriko wished nothing more than to forget everything and drown herself in the moment. She inched closer, locking her gaze with Ruki’s once again. He was the one who always managed to carry her to the stars, surely, he could help her again.

The CG edit is made by @cutelih. Thank you so much. Do not repost.

Grabbing the collar of Ruki’s blazer, Yuriko pressed her lips on his and kissed him like there was no tomorrow waiting for them. 

“So eager for your master…” Ruki laced his fingers with Yuriko’s hair. “Hmm… I cannot say I do not like that~”

“I… I need you!” Yuriko pulled Ruki’s bottom lip with her teeth without biting it. “Please… take me now. Take me to the stars.” She ran her hands over Ruki’s shoulders, pushing the blazer. Chuckling, Ruki allowed her to remove the piece of clothing, but Yuriko didn’t stop there. Taking the hem of his shirt, she yanked it upwards.

Holding Yuriko by the small of her back, Ruki sat up. He caught his own shirt, pulling it off and tossing it on the floor. By that moment, Yuriko was already tucking his belt open and unzipping his pants while he ripped down her skirt together with her panties. In the second, she had dropped both his pants and boxers off the bed, Ruki tore her top over her head and snapped her bra open.

Already panting, Yuriko crawled into a better position on Ruki’s lap again, his length pressing against her belly. The hardness jerked as she wrapped her fingers around it, moving her hand up and down while Ruki growled. “I should prepare you…”

“No! I need to feel you right now… I… I… I’m wet enough!” Yuriko lifted her hips, still holding Ruki’s manhood. She scooted closer while guiding it toward her damp depths. As she lowered her bottom, Ruki stretched her inch by inch until he reached her core, filling her as perfectly as ever.

Ruki’s fingers dug into Yuriko’s waist, the stormy eyes looking like a tornado was about to hit. Never before had Ruki allowed Yuriko to act like this, and it hit her that she might have stepped over the line. 

“You are squeezing me so well…” Ruki’s voice was nothing but a low murmur. “Come here…” He glided his hands along Yuriko’s back, hauling her against his chest until not even a piece of paper could have fitted in between them. Holding her by her upper back and by her bottom, he jerked his hips up. The rocking movement pushed a moan out of Yuriko’s mouth. She enveloped Ruki’s neck with her arms, swaying her hips up and down while their skins slid on each other, creating a new kind of friction that made her hope that they could truly become one like this.

“Yuriko…” Ruki breathed her name over and over again.

Yuriko clung to Ruki as he shifted his hands on her waist and started to drift her faster. “Ruki… oh… oh… oh my gosh!”

Capturing Ruki’s lips, Yuriko hauled him into another kiss. This time she invaded his mouth, not caring if she would be punished for the deed, but only met his tongue, tangling into a tango with it. 

Deeper. Deeper. Still. Faster. Moaning with moist slaps, the room filled with the fragrance of titillation. Sounds and scents mingled with the swings that swayed Yuriko to the stars and beyond. At this moment, she was nothing but the throbbing yearning for Ruki as he sent shooting stars of lusty pleasure coursing through her pulsing veins.

As Yuriko reached the end of the universe, she whimpered and sniveled against Ruki, her tears mixing with their drizzly smooch. Ruki groaned into her mouth, arriving home right after her and shooting his load deep within. Panting and heaving they could not stop smacking each other until Yuriko was completely out of breath. 

Feeling Ruki still switching within her, Yuriko pecked his lips one more time before resting her head on his shoulder. She wished to stay like this, Ruki in her, forever. Never separated again.

This was home. This moment. This Vampire.

Ruki.

#yuriko's story #yuriko tsukino #ruki mukami #karlheinz sakamaki #yuuto tsukino #other people's art #cutelih

[da-vulture-boi]

BakuDeku THEORY

SPOILERS

Ok. Here me out.

I’m not saying it’s right or okay for what Bakugou did to Deku. Not at all. But. Their relationship has improved with Bakugou apologizing.

In the anime, Bakugou clearly is angry all the time. But with a careful eye, you can see not everything he shows is hatred, he just believes it is. Emotional immaturity.

Deku is emotionally… also immature but better than Bakugou slightly. Bakugou admits in the manga, that he was jealous of Deku for being quirkless and still determined to be a hero. That he was starting to move without Bakugou in the lead.

When Bakugou “thanks” Deku for saving him from the slime villain, you can tell he’s struggling with his pride and trying to act tough. Because really, he did feel bad. Not just because Deku, a quirkless no one just saved the great and powerful Bakugou Katsuki. But also, he did it and didn’t rub it in his face. He risked his life to save him in a situation that Bakugou probably knew he couldn’t make it out himself in. If it wasn’t for Deku, he could have died.

As the story continues from there, you start to see more emotions from Bakugou as he tries to face that quirkless, weak, Deku is now independent and strong Deku. He was straying from Bakugou’s shadow. That was making him panic.

He realized he no longer has complete control. After the kidnapping, Bakugou saw Deku, destroyed from fighting with Muscular, still attempting to save him. And by his expression, you could tell, he hoped Deku would make it in time.

Slowly through the story, Bakugou is seeing Deku grow into an independent person, which makes him feel behind. When the two fought, he told of how he was struggling. All Might’s relationship with Deku, the sudden quirk, it all just was rubbing him the wrong way.

But when he found out the truth, he calmed a bit. Not completely, but a little better. He no longer had emotional breakdowns from him. Instead, he tried to aim high than Deku and took it as strength for a challenge.

Bakugou eventually apologized to Deku in order for Rogue Deku to come back to UA and stop hurting himself. But he did mean it. And he started to help Deku train. All Might even asked him if this was his way of regaining Izuku’s trust after the bullying, his way of atoning. Which, he confirmed. Knowing he feels bad, recognizes the mistake, and is trying to fix it is already showing major growth. The way he was watching Izuku train in that scene tells me he really struggles with that fact.

Then, when the war arc is started, and Bakugou dies, the entire chapter he never said “Deku” he said “Izuku” and no matter what, the whole chapter was saying good things about him. While he was fighting to the death, he couldn’t help but admire Izuku. That’s where he got his strength. Then the last remark about the game card that he wanted All Might to sign, he got with Izuku when they were still friends. And maybe, that had always been something he kept of Deku. When he started bullying him, I believe he still held the memories with him in a good way.

There’s a theory of him being mean to Deku because of him trying to protect the “weaker” person. And he got mad because Deku wasn’t accepting it.

Also of him being jealous of his friendliness so he tried to keep people away from him, keep him under his control.

And though Izuku said the name Deku was given as an insult, maybe it wasn’t a clear message. For instance, he actually thought of Deku as a compliment but turned it around using word play to make it sound like he was useless. Plus, he names all his friends degrading nicknames. Shitty Hair, Dunce Face, Raccoon Eyes, etc. So the fact he gave Izuku a name that was degrading might also be his way of saying they were friends. In his own way.

There’s a lot of reading in between the lines with those two. We don’t actually know if being diagnosed quirkless was why Bakugou started to bully him. It could of been they had a fight, or a rumor, and the timing just matched up. We don’t know. And if the author doesn’t tell us, we’ll never know.

#bnha #boku no hero academia #mha #my hero acedamia #katsuki bakugo my hero academia #katsuki bakugou #mha my hero academia #izuku midoriya #bakudeku #theory #mha theory #bakudeku theory #katsudeku #katsudeku theory #bakugou katsuki x midoriya izuku #mha spoilers #spoilers

[sierraraeck]

Unfortunate Similarities

JJ x Rafe

Masterlist

Summary: JJ and Rafe come to an unexpected understanding.

Category: Slight angst

Warnings: Discussion of their shitty fathers, physical fighting described, drug and alcohol use

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: In another universe they could’ve tried to be decent to each other.

•••

God, he couldn’t even get a day off.

He goes home and it’s his dad. He goes out and it’s the Kooks.

JJ just wanted a break. Or for it all to be over.

JJ had finally landed a job serving drinks at one of the richy-rich restaurants on the right side of the island, which meant he got reasonable pay, but it also meant he had to deal with richy-rich assholes. JJ was bad at dealing with richy-rich assholes, especially when their last name was Cameron. It was even worse if their first name was Rafe.

Rafe had had it out for him since day one. Of course, it made sense, they were polar opposites. Rafe grew up in a mansion with the perfect family, and JJ grew up in what could barely be considered a shed with no family. At least, no family he liked to admit. They were no better than oil and water.

Or maybe neither of them really tried to actually get along with anyone.

Either way, Rafe and JJ were not friends. Yet somehow, JJ always seemed to end up alone with the guy. Not by choice, he might add.

JJ was just trying to get his paycheck. All he wanted to do was serve his drinks and get paid and go home, but he felt the eyes on him. Rafe had been staring down the back of his head for the past twenty minutes at least. He knew it was coming before it happened, not like Rafe was particularly subtle.

The moment JJ went through the door to the kitchen he felt Rafe behind him. He thought about escape routes, but he was too tired to give any of them a try. And anyways, it was too late to change his mind as the storage room door clicked shut behind him. JJ braced himself.

Rafe was predictable. He grabbed JJ by the shoulders and forced him to turn around and look at him. JJ was smirking. He couldn’t help it, even though he knew it would only make things worse. Rafe said something, but JJ wasn’t listening.

Rafe took a whole two seconds before wiping that smirk right off his face. Right hook to the jaw, left jab to the gut. JJ offered a swing back for show, but didn’t really care if it landed or not. He was on the ground within seconds, a few feet, a few fists. Hard to keep track.

After a minute or so, JJ could no longer remember which spots hurt because Rafe just now hit him there, or if they were bruises being reinjured from his dad the night before. Not like it really mattered.

Rafe was looming over him, holding him up by the collar of his shirt with one hand and beating his face in with the other. Blood spilled down JJ’s face, and he could see the white of his shirt seeping away. He laughed.

It must’ve caught Rafe so off guard because he stopped for a moment, fist in the air.

“What’s so funny, Maybank?” Rafe demanded. JJ choked around a laugh, shaking his head. “What’s your problem? Finally realized you can’t take me?”

JJ shook his head again. “Look man, you and my dad seem to be doing a hell of a job tag teaming me until I’m dead so I might as well just get it over with. You actually have something to lose, and I’d rather destroy your life than his, so do it. Kill me. Have your fun then finish it.”

JJ’s eye had already begun to swell, and the blood wasn’t improving his vision, but he could still see the change in Rafe. He stood over JJ, holding his head up by the collar, fist overhead… and then he just dropped him.

Rafe seemed more shocked than JJ by his actions. Rafe took a few steps back and sat down while JJ, head dead weight on the ground, stared up at the light above him. He’d never noticed before that it made a small buzzing sound. Or maybe that was just his ears ringing, hard to be sure.

JJ laid there on the cool tile for what felt like hours. Then he realized that he never heard the door open. It took some mental convincing and all his physical effort to prop himself up on his elbows and lift his head to look.

Rafe was still sitting there on the floor next to JJ’s limp legs. JJ plopped his head back on the floor. He decided not to waste energy on trying to figure out why the guy hadn’t left, or why he hadn’t gone back to kicking the shit out of him, or why Rafe did anything.

Finally, Rafe made a move to stand up, and JJ figured he was coming back for round two. Instead, he made his way over to the fridge and started rummaging around.

Oh great, now he’s stealing from me too. I’m definitely getting fired.

Rafe returned, two beers in hand, and sat back down across from JJ. JJ lifted his head to stare at the guy who’d always hated him holding one of the beers out in his direction. He must’ve been as tired as JJ was.

As confusing as it was, JJ was not the type to turn down alcohol, especially when his head hurt as much as it did, so he propped himself up on his elbows again and took the can. Neither boy wasted any time cracking the top and taking a large swig.

They sat there drinking and staring until Rafe finally broke the silence. “I don’t actually have that much to lose.”

JJ just stared at him.

“Sarah is the favorite. I’m the fuck up. My dad’s not all that great either.”

“Right. I’m sure the mansion is just salt in the wound. Not very many places to hide in a place so small,” JJ scoffed.

“Listen, Maybank, you’re not the only one with problems on this island.”

“Is that supposed to make me feel better? Cause last I checked, I don’t have anyone to bail me out or cover my fuck ups or leave me with a shit load of money. The best I have going for me is prison, and every goddamn person on this island knows it and is just waiting for me to screw up big enough to take me down. That ever happen to you?” Rafe was silent. “That’s what I fucking thought.”

JJ was tired of looking at Rafe’s face, and knew he had to get back to work, so he took another long drink and forced himself to a sitting position. It hurt like hell, but he refused to show that on his face. He put the can down and his hands on the floor behind him in an attempt to push himself up, but fell back to the floor. JJ grit his teeth and tried again, but it was no use. He finished off his drink.

Rafe stood and offered JJ a hand. The third surprise of the day. JJ started to believe he was hallucinating, but took his hand anyway. Rafe lifted him from the ground to his feet, and JJ winced as his shoulder was stretched. JJ did not thank him for helping, only turned around and went to find another shirt. This wasn’t the first time something or someone had ruined his white work shirt, so he knew where they kept the extras.

JJ stripped his shirt off and threw the new one on, hoping he’d remember to come back for the bloody one to burn later tonight. When he turned around, Rafe was staring at him with wide eyes.

“Admiring your work?” JJ deadpanned.

“A lot of that was not my work.”

JJ shrugged. “You’ve never had a real fight.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure.”

“Oh yeah?” JJ asked, taking a step toward Rafe. “When was the last time your dad hit you, tough guy?”

“This morning,” Rafe answered, without a breath of hesitation. “Guess he’s not a fan of cocaine.”

JJ took a moment to think, then replied, “Too bad. I could use some. Got any on ya?”

Rafe snorted. “In the middle of the restaurant you’re supposed to be working?”

JJ shrugged. “I’ll be fired in a week. Might as well have some fun.”

JJ sat down and Rafe joined him on the floor. He pulled a bag, not of white, but of a brownish-green out of his pocket. JJ scoffed. “Oh come on, I thought you had something more interesting.”

“Best I could do,” Rafe retorted. Each boy rolled like a pro and lit up themselves. Clouds of smoke soon filled the air. The headache JJ had was finally subsiding.

They got more than halfway through their joints (it wasn’t a competition but JJ was burning through his quicker) before they broke the silence.

“We’re gonna end up just like them.” The statement was so shocking to hear out loud that JJ didn’t realize it was him that said it until Rafe responded.

“It’s not looking good.”

“We can try, can’t we? We have a shot…” JJ said it with more skepticism than hope.

Rafe sat on that for a while before replying, “We can pretend to, but…” He cut himself off, shaking his head.

JJ mirrored the motion and gave a single laugh. “We’re too far gone.”

Neither spoke after that. When the paper burned out, JJ got up to go back to his job. He left Rafe there on the floor of the storage room with his thoughts and a half-inch left before the fun ran out.

JJ wasn’t quite sure exactly what had happened within that half-hour, and wouldn’t have been able to convince himself it was real either if it weren’t for the change in behavior.

At the next party, Rafe and JJ had to pull Topper and John B off each other, but that’s where the excitement ended. They stood there for a few seconds staring at each other, but then Rafe gave a single nod, JJ returned it, and they took their friends away with them.

After that, Rafe and JJ had a silent agreement to leave each other alone. Not friends. Never. Not even close. But they realized they had enough unfortunate similarities to call it a day. And neither was complaining about that.

#obx fanfiction #jj obx #obx imagine #rafe outer banks #obx #obx fic #rafe obx #obx angst #jj outer banks #jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #outerbanks rafe #rafe angst #outer banks imagines

[silent-v0ice]

12/15/22 hi

i don’t think you ever really loved me. i know you said it countless times, and reassured me you meant well, but your actions this year speak volumes. if you loved me, and i mean truly loved me, you wouldn’t have done this. you wouldn’t have spread those rumors and said those horrible things. you changed me this year. im glad i’m better with people now, but i know i am because i’m no longer with you. i know i’m better because you were abusing me. to say the least, im not surprised you acted the way you did. i knew you were capable of doing that based on the things you said to me. even while we were dating, you talked about me behind my back to people i considered family. peoples actions depict their personality, sufficed to say you lack in that area. your whole person is based off of other’s appreciation, yet when you’re given the opportunity to be kind, you resist. you resist because you’re scared of being left behind. isn’t that ironic? isn’t that odd that you would leave the person you “loved” behind like it was absolutely nothing? i can tell you know people are fed up with you. you’re terrified of it, rightfully so. i know that feeling well, and i know how hard it is. whats most fucked up about this is how fast i would let you back into my life. if you came up to me crying, i would comfort you. if you asked to come over, i would let you. the truth of the matter is, i know part of me still loves you. the problem is, i don’t know who you are anymore. the person i once knew and loved morphed into some creature of disgust. you chose to turn away at my lowest point, and for that i will never forgive you. you’ll never admit it, most likely out of fear of rejection, but i know part of you loves me still. the speed at which you lash out at me for the smallest inconveniences to you proves my point completely. you’re scared. you’re scared of what you’ve become, because even you know there’s no backing down. you have thin walls of backup that you push against constantly. you break people, but they still stay. i would know better than anyone. so, i say you never really loved me, yet you still love me? im sure that doesn’t make sense, so let me explain. you loved your version of me. you loved the me that you created, and twisted into exactly what you wanted. you never loved me for me. you never loved me when i was truly upset, you more so thought of that as a rip in that fairytale you created out of spite and delusion. i cant say i blame you though. i know how hard it is to support someone with the mental illnesses i do. what i can blame you for is how you took it out on me. all the nights, the calls, the pictures, the trips we took together. those moments weren’t happy. at the time, i saw happiness between us in the moments where you weren’t mad at me. when you weren’t gaslighting me. my vision of happiness was so below bare minimum that i felt at fault constantly. i was worried about you constantly. the almost year we dated still gives me that ache in my stomach, i don’t know if it’ll ever truly go away. i still cry about you a lot. i don’t cry for you, or for your shitty actions, i cry for what you’ve become. i cry for the bond i still have tied to you. i’ve tried for this entire year to cut that bond. to forget. to move on. all that’s done is made me realize how little you cared. i don’t think i slept for more than four hours every night that year. i was terrified, and to be honest, i still am. we aren’t on the same plane anymore, yet if you were to leave permanently i don’t think i would be able to continue. it’s sad really, looking back. what i want you to know, and let sink in, is this. don’t let your decisions this year skew your concept of getting better. you are able to change. your mindset now is so incredibly toxic, and sadly, i still worry about you. take care of the people around you fully, but more importantly, take care of yourself. think about your actions before they are set in motion. i hope you’re doing alright.

[glitchydyke]

I saw your post about the Queen's funeral and you took the words right out of my mouth!

I'm in a similar position. My mother and I are going to have to sign on next Monday (which, as a twenty-something feels embarrassing). We're having to limit electricity use (this means no lights on in the house—even when we're eating and can't see anything on our plate), we can't eat the foods we usually eat because of the stupid inflation (which is tricky because me and brother are on the spectrum), we haven't had a takeaway, or any treats, in so long. The words 'cost of living crisis' make me tear up everytime I hear it. We're literally questioning our own survival, making comments like "if we're alive this time next year" or "if we aren't homeless by then" which has became our new normal... IT REALLY SHOULDN'T... But it is.

However, as you probably know, the five major telly channels are dedicated to the Queen. Not a single thing about the cost of living crisis has been mentioned. The Queen's untimely death has FUCKED US OVER for news/advice that we usually received on week day mornings. Not saying this is her fault, but the coverage had to be green-lighted by someone. This extensive coverage is horrific. My thoughts actually go out to those who got murdered yesterday but they won't make headlines because of the Queen.

The worst part is that my mum feels emotional about Lizzie's death. She gets angry and defensive when me and my brother crack jokes about her, which I admit is a shitty thing and we're going to hell, but the thing is... Lizzie didn't care about poor people like us. Not really. Therefore, yesterday, when she died, the kids were playing football extra loud in the alleyways and nobody stopped to turn off their loud af Ed Sheeran music lol! She had so many chances to intervene and tell companies to stop copying each other and raising the prices of things, but she didn't. Llzzie only cared about our taxes so she had some "get out of jail" money for Andrew...

Her one last (final insult) is her lavish STATE funeral. You would've thought a "good, caring Monarch" would've requested for a little farewell-do, right? Especially since she was apparently(?) aware that people like you and me are fucking on the brink of losing everything... But no, she wants the theatrics. The only thing she requested was a national day off instead of a bank holiday—wtf is that gonna do?! It's an insult to give everyone a day off to watch her expensive funeral while our bank accounts keep plummeting.

I'm so sorry for the rant. It hurtd that she has been planning for her death these past two years (possibly even longer than we know about), and in that time she did more for her desd-self than for us.

that’s is so so awful i’m so sorry your family is going through all this :( it’s horrible how this countries priorities are the people in power and not the people who need + deserve help and safe living situations

genuinely i get what you mean, my mum was sad over the death too because she “liked the queen” and i genuinely don’t know how to explain to her that she really really shouldn’t. that the queen wasn’t just a sweet old lady on tv and does not care about us or others like us, and like you just said, did more for her post-death self than the people of her country that she supposedly cared for ://

i’m just. so fucking mad that so much is going to be spent on the stupid fucking funeral and then the coronation when there’s people who are suffering, who don’t know if they’re going to be able to eat, be warm, keep their houses through the winter. and again like you said, people who’ve been killed, bad things that have happened, are just… not being reported because she’s so much more important. even after her death she’s still in so much control over the country which was obviously always going to happen but it’s still disgusting to see.

i’m genuinely so sorry, and i really hope things somehow get better for you and your family soon. i love you sm 💗

#god this whole situation is just. so gross #asks

[gearbroth]

TF2 Pride week - Day 1 : Flags

( #dnadprideweek2021 )

edit: updated the *chile* flag to actually being the *texas* flag now. everyone who pointed this out thank u, I’m a very embarrassed texan now sdfgsdkj

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #dnadprideweek2021 #tf2 engineer #tf2 scout #this took me longer than i care to admit and it still turned out shitty sdgsdf #anyway yea here's a first pride thing i guess just a dumb doodle idea ssdfgjkhfd #myart #tf2 pride #pride flags #gay #trans #bisexual #texas #yup #dammit aaa i forGOT HIS BEER #his texas beer.... dammit #oh well sdfkjsdf #edit: it was tired and i just wanted this done man i didnt bother lookin up the flags sdfdsf #im so fucking embaressed rn you have no idea sdkljfhsdf #im literally living here #for YEARS #and i thought.... i jsdjfkhsk #god.

[starbuckie]

����𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠

pairing(s): college!peter parker x reader, dark!steve rogers x reader, dark!sam wilson x reader, dark!bucky barnes x reader

words: 8.1k words

warnings: DARK!FIC, SMUT 18+ (unprotected sex, foursome turned fivesome, gangbang, non-con/dub-con, daddy kink, oral M and F-receiving, spit kink, degredation kink, praise kink, creampie), age-gap (reader is in her early 20s), cheating, angst, there’s like zero fluff

summary: peter should’ve made it back to the tower for date night on time, or maybe just before he found his girlfriend being fucked by three other superheroes.

a/n: eee my first dark fic! im so so happy with the way this turned out, and even though it was a pain in my ass for nearly three months, im so hapy to share it with y’all. this idea was brought up by an anon from @mypoisonedvine’s saturday sleepover a few months back, but i switched up tony and sam bc i didn’t like the tony and peter stuff. hopefully my smut has improved from the first time i wrote it in january, and just a reminder that in no way, shape, or form do i condone rape of any kind. there’s a large difference from the page and the real world. i try to put all tw’s in the tags and warnings, but if there was something i missed please tell me. thank you to my lovely bestie @mermaidxatxheart for beta-reading(i have no fucking clue what i’d do without your help). feel free to leave a comment or two and reblog, but don’t repost anywhere or i will hunt down your ass. thank you again and please please enjoy <3

main masterlist || mcu masterlist || sebastian stan characters masterlist

Bucky wasn’t planning to fuck Y/N as soon as he saw her.

It started with a faint mention, something Tony had thrown around along the lines of, “Parker’s bringing his girl down here tomorrow, don’t be an asshole”. He didn’t give a damn what Tony said or how he acted around Peter’s girl. Years of being thrown between gruesome mind-wiping and being half-dead, asleep in a freezer would do that to a man.

So the next day when Peter brought his girlfriend in, he was scratching his ass like a fucking ape and downing a beer with a messy bun at the nape of his neck, until he actually saw her. Neat hair, even neater laces with a sweet smile but a body that could kill. Didn’t matter that she was bundled under Parker’s hoodie and a pair of jeans- he could always admire a pretty dame, but Bucky could see that she was beyond that. It was as if God had intentionally made the one being, the one ethereal creature beautiful and angelic enough to be a sin away from him, so that he couldn’t touch her. Because she was young, and in her twenties, and that shouldn’t have even been the first two things that popped up in his mind because she was also Peter’s girlfriend.

But then she had the audacity to stick her hand out, a shy grin and twinkle in her eyes as she gave her name. It sounded so pretty rolling off of her tongue, and he wondered what it would sound like while he groaned it into her cunt.

Y/N. 

So, yeah, maybe Bucky wasn’t planning to fuck her as soon as he met her, but it was pretty damn close after.

-

Steve Rogers was one of very few men who said they had the pleasure of banging nearly every woman on the north side of Manhattan. Bucky indulged in the fact that the man who had once been too shy to do so much as meet a gal’s gaze was now “a dollar whore”, but he was more than happy to keep that title if it meant he could continue to get off in the nearest woman’s mouth everyday. 

Every time he walked down the streets of New York with just a simple ball cap and jeans, he could feel stares on his back from what seemed like miles away, girls on every street corner just waiting for him to take her into the nearest public bathroom and fuck them dirty. CEOs, baristas, girls fresh out of getting master’s degrees with stars in their eyes and big dreams, until he shattered them by making them gag on his cock and scream his name into bedsheets. Or tile floors. He didn’t care as long as they were screaming. The girls of this century were just too delectable to turn down. He didn’t discriminate. His dick had been in women of every height, stature, hair color, and he had quite the variety throwing themselves at him as well.

And then Tony ruined it all and sat him down with a simple explanation that the image of Captain America was being tainted with disturbing stories of girls being fucked in the ass and thrown on their knees in dirty bathroom stalls. The blond was beyond pissed when the billionaire told him to stop dicking around, but he couldn’t do anything else if he wanted to keep his title and job. In a new century, even if he’d had a few years to adjust, he was still absolutely oblivious when it came to anything outside of aliens and sex. There was nothing left for him outside of being an Avenger, so reluctantly he agreed to keep his number of conquests to a minimum, and most definitely inside of the tower rather than out on the street.

However, inside of the tower seemed to be no problem at all when Peter brought his girlfriend over, all smiles and straight A’s, and that’s when Steve realized that he’d yet to fuck a bright, little college student. He could see himself stripping her from the innocence in her eyes, loosening up her pussy with his thick cock against the wall in his room.

Surely Tony couldn’t reprimand him for spending a little time trying to bond with Peter’s new girl, right?

-

Sam Wilson was a simple man. He had a job, a well-paid one at that, somewhere to live, a girlfriend, or a woman to keep him company, that’s for sure- but for once in his life he was seeking out something other than missions, something that would keep him busy when he was feeling bored, something like-

Pleasure, and he knew that he’d finally found what he was looking for the moment Peter brought his girlfriend through the elevator doors on the fifty-sixth level of the Avengers tower. She’d shaken his hand so daintily and spoke so politely that if he were to see her without any backstory, he’d think she was another innocent, dim-witted college student, breaking her bank account every Saturday morning and naively believing that her relationship would last longer than a few months. But by the things Parker had told him, she was much more than that.

Was it shitty of Peter to tell his teammates, the people he worked with, how Y/N was in bed? By the majority’s vote, probably, and by Sam’s strict conduct of his own morals, definitely, but when Peter’s girl looked like that and he was so incredibly bored with his routine? 

Well, fuck, Sam had never been happier that the Spider-kid had told everyone how his girl gave head.

Peter brought his girlfriend in daily after that, and every one of her visits, she grew less shy and more friendly, and the Falcon saw each of his friends gape at her growing comfortability with a wolfish demeanor. It started with the water incident with Steve in the kitchen, where he so clearly spilled water on her already thin, white camisole with intention. Sam couldn’t say he was upset though, after all Steve had offered him and the rest of the Avengers quite a show when he tried to clean up her shirt, taking his sweet, sweet time to fondle her tits as subtly as he could, his eyes staring at her pebbled nipples poking through the material. He could see Bucky hiding his boner under his cereal bowl on the couch that day. 

Then of course, he’d been no better than America’s sweetheart himself when he greeted Y/N with a hug that in hindsight, was a little too enthusiastic. His large hands squeezed into the pockets of her back pocket, and if the college student found anything weird with it, she didn’t say so, but Sam graciously palmed the round globes of her ass in his hands, feeling the muscle clench under his fingers. Oh, how he’d never hugged someone that tight ever before in his life. Maybe he would’ve gotten a bit further than squeezing her ass had it not been for his own girlfriend standing behind him, ready to introduce herself to Y/N.

Bucky, well, Sam could admit that Bucky had the most guts out of all of them. Though the super-soldier was normally well-reserved and polite, the dark glint in his eyes the day he met Y/N let him in on the secret that he had a much dirtier mind than most thought. It had been movie night that time, and he barely even tried to cover up how much he wanted the girl, his hands resting all over her as they watched Inception. Hardly a movie to get so riled up over, yet Bucky’s hand still inched its way up her thigh, his rough fingers gently carressing the flesh until they started to lightly trace the apex of her thighs. 

If she noticed anything then, she didn’t comment on it, doe-like eyes just marvelling at the screen in great intrigue. It was only when Peter’s arms wrapped around her a bit tighter did she scooch away from Bucky’s touch, with a small apology and shy grin. 

That only made his dick harder.

On the other side of Bucky, his super-soldier counterpart tapped his knee gently, forcing their blue eyes to meet each other. No words had to be said between the two, three men when they looked over to Sam, because they all recognized that look they saw in each other's eyes; predatory, dark, nearly voracious in the way they all wanted to be balls deep inside of Y/N.

And they would get there. No matter how long it took, they knew that the ultimate prize of tearing their prey apart would be more than worth the wait.

-

“Hey, babe, I’m gonna be a little late. Ned and I got stuck back in the lab, so we’re gonna need to stay until eight or nine. Can you make it to the tower by yourself alright?”

Peter’s concerned voice made Y/N smile gently as she trudged along the rainy streets of New York. He always loved to worry about her, especially when it was dark and gloomy out, but she could handle herself pretty okay. By pretty okay, of course meant she could kick ass like no other twenty-something year-old, but she wasn’t one to brag. Y/N readjusted the Kate Spade purse on her shoulder with her right hand, attempting to keep her umbrella over her head with the other. “I’ll be fine, Pete, just go finish up and get back to me. I’m gonna be waiting in your room at the tower before you go off on that mission this weekend.”

A small sigh came through the speaker, “Okay, I’ll try to get back to you soon. I love you, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Pete.” 

“Oh,” she could hear the shy but no less mischievous smile that was taking over his face, “I left you a little present on the bed, make sure you open it before I get back.”

Y/N’s face heated at the implication. “Peter Parker, you dirty little-” He ended the call with a laugh, and she huffed out a small chuckle at his childish antics.

The walk to the Avengers tower would have been nice, had it not been for the downfall of rain, making everything mushy, socks being absolutely soaked through her sneakers by the time she arrived. The receptionist at the front desk, Jenny, if Y/N remembered correctly, stared at her a little oddly, probably not expecting to see the young college girl in such a state of disorder, but it didn’t affect her at all. She confidently strutted up to the elevator, pressing in the floor number where all the rooms were located. Y/N scrolled through her Twitter feed on her phone while classic rock blared through the elevator with the constant shuffling of people moving in and out. Seven minutes and thirty-two seconds later she was sprinting down the halls with soggy shoes and damp hair, her cold body screaming for warmth.

Peter’s room was the farthest down the hall, and the room was fairly empty. He rarely stayed at his room in the tower, preferring to stay with his Aunt May or keep Y/N company in Brooklyn. When she entered the room, she saw a plain white shirt and a pair of socks strewn upon the carpeted floor, but what really caught her eye was the red box wrapped in a pink bow on the bed. Deciding it would add more suspense if she opened it later, she quickly hopped in the shower, letting the hot water warm her freezing, rigid muscles under the spray. 

Peter didn’t have all the products she’d usually use before she knew they were going to have sex, so she had to make do with the half-used bar of Irish Spring and his small travel-sized bottles of shampoo and conditioner, promising the fresh, breezy smell of citrus and mint. It was a quick process; two squeezes of shampoo, shaving with the green soap as best as she could without cutting herself, one squeeze of conditioner. A fuzzy towel sat waiting for Y/N on the rack, with the Spiderman symbol as a prank gift from her to her lovely boyfriend, and without a second to let the heat leave her damp skin, she wrapped herself in it, quickly hopping out to the bedroom again.

The lingerie she set out on the bed was a deep set burgundy color, with lace decorating the delicate corset and the trim of the satin panties. The packaging really did not do it justice. Y/N grinned at the new set, one that she knew would happily be torn from her body later. A shiver ran through her as she let the cold air fall over her skin, carefully slipping the lingerie on. It was a damn shame, really; the set was quite nice, and she reminded herself to buy more of the nicely suiting color for their nights together. 

Click.

Y/N’s heart thumped with anticipation as she heard the door open and she took a quick moment to ready herself. Hair in perfect style, legs stretched along the length of the bed to make herself look as seductive as possible, a small smirk thrown on her pouty lips.

But in the darkened room, it wasn’t Peter’s shadow that appeared. Three men, three tall, bulkier men’s shadows appeared at the foot of the bed, and horror washed over her as she realized who they were. “Goddamn, dolly, I’ve imagined what you would’ve looked like under those sweaters, but this is much sweeter than I expected.”

The sinister face of Bucky Barnes came into her view, just a sliver of moonlight lighting up his pale skin. His eyes raked over Y/N’s uncovered skin, and goosebumps appeared as she tried to cover herself up under his predatory gaze.

“W-what are you doing here?” She whispered worriedly. Sam and Steve flanked the bed on either side of her, plastered sickly sweet smiles on their faces, providing her with a false sense of security that made her heart scream in fear. Though she wasn't making any noise, her lungs felt like they were going to give out, her throat closing up like an allergic reaction. 

Her head whipped every which way in robotic movement, her brain seeming to fail her as she scanned the room for an exit. Several moments of shortened breaths, cold air chilling her body, before she came out of her freezing shock to realization.

“Why are you here? Please, get out, just g-get out!”

A calloused hand pushed away Y/N’s left arm that covered her tits, and Steve groaned at the sight of her pebbled nipples. “God, baby, they’re as pretty as I thought they’d be. Been trying to feel them up all week, but you knew that, didn’t you?”

Saturday the week before at lunch when he’d spilled water over chest and tried to clean her up. Sam’s friendly hug that became a bit less friendly when his hands slipped into the back pockets of her jeans. The movie night on Monday when Bucky’s hand caressed her thigh a little too close to her core. All of their touches began to make more sense, and her eyes filled with tears at the realization. 

“Please,” she begged, tears blocking her vision, “I promise I won’t tell anyone, not even Pete, but please just go.”

“You just don’t get it, do you?” Steve asked. He grasped her chin roughly, his face close enough to hers so that she could feel his fiery breath on her lips. “We’re not leaving, sweetheart. You’re gonna let all three of us play with your pretty little body, and you’re gonna make the prettiest sounds for us, alright?”

Y/N shook her head violently, too afraid to make noise, but also bold enough to make one last attempt at freedom. The hand that held her chin quickly moved to slap her cheek, and she hated the way the sting made heat stir in her lower belly. She tried to shy away from their touch again, but Bucky’s face simply held the same smirk as he trailed his vibranium fingers up and down her leg. 

“Oh, come on, Y/N, don’t act all shy now. Peter has been telling us how good you’ve been to him and don’t think he hasn’t told us about your little childhood crush on little ol’ me. Been wanting to fuck you ever since.” Bucky’s hand quickly left her body, instead moving to palm over the bulge in his pants. “Fuck, sweetheart, got me real hard just thinking ‘bout your pussy swallowing my cock. Bet you’re gonna be a sweet, obedient girl for me, right?”

Fire started to course through Y/N’s veins, and with all the power she tried to dampen it down with, it seemed to push through her body that much more dangerously. She despised the fact that she could feel herself growing wet for the three older men, but God, she had never felt the need to be filled up as badly as she did in that moment.

“You’re a bit of a slut, don’t you think?” Sam mocked. He kneeled on her right, his eyes fixated on her panty-clad pussy, a wet patch already forming on the soft satin. It really didn’t help that three of her teen celebrity crushes were eyeing her nearly naked body like a piece of meat. “I mean, look at you, already growing wet and needy for three cocks. Is that what you want, honey? Parker not treating you good enough?”

She hesitated. Goosebumps rose across her skin at the sinister tone of his voice, like he already knew it was true. And it was true and she hated that Sam was right, but as amazing as Peter was a boyfriend, it was clear from the vibrator hiding in his apartment’s bathroom that he was not amazing in the sheets. Every time, she held hope that it would be better, that she would finally get to stop faking an orgasm before he rolled out of the bed with a filled up condom, but she knew deep down inside of her that it wasn’t happening anytime soon. Y/N forced herself to nod weakly at Sam’s questions, and Bucky chuckled. “Oh, you poor dolly, we’re gonna have so much fun with you. Treat you better than that little boy ever could.”

All it took was a whimper, a nearly audible, deadly silent whimper that managed to squeak its way past Y/N’s throat, and the three men took it as permission to ravage her body however they pleased.

Steve made quick work of his pants as Sam lifted her chin to kiss him, his tongue hot and heavy against her mouth, coaxing her lips open. The sound of belt buckles hitting the floor shamefully turned on Y/N even more. Panic coursed through her senses, her mind wanting to scream for them to stop, but her body knew her too well as she felt a wave of slick run down her thighs. Cold metal digits slipped under the waistband of her panties, moving to her wet folds, and she whimpered into Sam’s mouth at the touch. 

“You look so nice, baby, so pretty all laid out for us like this.” Bucky’s hands pulled down her panties as Steve pinched her peaked nipple through the lace, laying lavish, open-mouthed kisses down her torso. The cool air hit her pussy when Bucky’s hands pulled her legs wide open, fully exposed to the three men ready to use her against her will. “Knew you’d be so wet for us, sweetheart, just look at you. Dripping all for your daddies,” Steve murmured against her skin.

Hot breath fanned over her cunt before they rolled her over on her stomach, someone’s hands forcing her up onto her knees with her face smashed into the cotton pillows. She could feel two rough human hands pulling her ass cheeks apart, spreading her ever wider for their view. “Would you look at that, boys, look how fucking hot she is for us.”

Sam’s thick finger ran through her folds, the calloused pad of his finger just teasing her clit before landing a harsh smack to the inside of her thigh. Her moan was muffled through the mattress and she prayed they wouldn’t hear how being treated like whore made her wet like nothing else. 

Hot slick dripped down her thighs, a pool of it staining the pristine sheets by each knee. It was quite a sight, Steve, kneeled by the bed as his face hovered next to her ear, whispering filthy things into her ear as Bucky stroked his hard, leaking cock right next to him. Sam’s lips were making their way up the inside of her right thigh, cracked skin gliding across her sticky flesh. “Oh, baby,” he purred, “you smell so good. Bet you taste even better, don’t you, little girl?”

His tongue reached the apex of her thighs, finally licking a stipe up her center with no warning. Y/N sobbed into the comforter below her, mascara stained tears marking up her face. Two fingers edged their way between the bed and her face, forcing her head upwards and arching her back. Steve’s face was caught in a dirty smirk above hers, lip pulled taut between his teeth, until he saw the tears trailing down her face. “Oh, sweetheart, you look so desperate like this.” His fingers traced her smeared lip gloss around her lips, before opening her lips harshly. “Open up, you dumb baby.”

Y/N forced her jaw open wider, just enough to watch a string of Steve’s saliva drip into her mouth. The thick spit pooled on her tongue and she tried hard not to grimace in front of him, in hopes that he wouldn’t make her- 

“Swallow it, sweetheart.” He saw the hesitation in her eyes, how her lower lip trembled at his words, but he just laughed at her. “Now.”

The warm saliva slid down her tongue and more black tears ran down her face as she obliged his orders, finally gulping it and cringing at the taste. Steve loved the way her face screwed up in displeasure, how she still had the audacity to pretend she hated what they were doing though she was moaning and whimpering with Sam’s tongue attacking her entrance.

“What do you want, sweetheart? We might give it to you as long as you use your words.” Bucky taunted lightly.

Y/N stared up at the brunette, staring menacingly down at her with his cock in hand. “Please,” she whimpered.

The three found it woeful, the way she could barely get a full sentence out as Sam went to town with his skilled tongue, but even with that onslaught, a simple please wasn’t enough for them.

“Please what, honey,” Sam moaned from between her legs, “you gotta use your big words or we’ll never know what you want from us.”

Steve and Bucky nodded in fake-agreement even though they all knew exactly what she wanted and where. 

“I don’t-” her widened eyes glanced into Steve’s, blown-out and teary. “I don’t want anything, not from you.” She lied through her teeth harshly.

Sam removed his head from between her thighs and Y/N immediately whined at the loss of contact almost hilariously. “You don’t want anything, little girl?” 

The air felt static, every hair on her neck rising in the pressured silence. The angel and the devil clawed at her heart, each trying to show her what was right. And she wanted to sin, God knew that she would love nothing more than to let that little greedy part of her take over, but she’d already cheated on Peter and that damn good part of her conscience stole the wheels of her brain.

Slowly and shamefully, she shook her head, though the downright dirty monster inside of her wanted the men to ignore her words and keep assaulting her body. 

“That’s a shame, baby, I thought we were having fun.” Sam sighed. He met Bucky’s gaze on the side, and though they seemed to be in resignation with her wishes, their eyes twinkled devilishly. He positioned his body over Y/N’s kneeled over form, his bare chest glued to her sweating back as his hands ran up the sides of her ribcage and to her front, just barely grazing over her sensitive nipples. “You mean, you don’t want me to touch you here?”

He pinched the darkened buds and she had to use every ounce of self-restraint to not collapse at the sensation. His calloused hands moved back even further, tracing down to the stretch of skin just above her mound, swiping a finger across the skin delicately. “How about here? Or even,” he brought three fingers around her body, over her ass, and into her glistening cunt again, just rubbing along her entrance, not daring to go further in. Y/N couldn’t hold in her reaction to his prodding anymore, his teasing chipping away all of her dignity and pride in a few simple touches. 

“Yes, please, please, use your fingers,” she blurted against her will. Where shame should have washed over her, there was only lust, raging red and coursing through her body so forcefully that she felt braindead. “Put your fingers in me, daddy, please.”

The pet name rolled off of her tongue so easily and she was barely ashamed of how it made her feel. The name especially shocked the three men, who smiled even wider with their cocks harder than before at the little slip up. “That was all you had to say, dolly, gonna have your daddies make you feel real good,” Bucky laughed.

Sam finally plunged his thick fingers knuckle-deep into her cunt as Steve’s mouth captured hers, effectively swallowing her scream with ferocity. The long digits scissored and swirled inside of her, pressing against new unexplored areas that she’d never even gotten to with her own fingers. White dots danced along the front line of her vision as teeth clashed against hers and though it’d been mere minutes she already knew she was close and the men did as well.

“I can feel you clamping around my fingers, honey,” Sam taunted. His lips were moving sinfully around her ass, planting sloppy kisses and drooling all over her skin while he fingered her deep. “Are you gonna come soon, baby?”

“Yes, daddy, I’m so- fuck,” Y/N panted into Steve’s mouth, “m’ so c-close.” The blond bit her tongue hard enough for her to taste blood and she yelped as she heard Sam and Bucky laugh. 

“Watch your language, dolly,” Bucky sneered from the side of the bed. His hand was rapidly moving around his cock, corkscrew motions edging him towards the brink of pleasure. 

“Little girls like you don’t get to use big swear words,” Sam’s face was still buried between her legs, his soaked fingers pulling out of her cunt only to rub at her little pearl of nerves in circles. His tongue still lapped at her dripping entrance and he could feel her tight hole start to pulse as her breathing picked up. “Oh, baby, you’re getting close, aren’t you?”

Y/N was hesitant to answer at first, the sweat on her body seeming to cool immediately in fear of what would happen if she messed up. But after five seconds Steve stopped kissing her, gripping her chin and staring into her eyes deeply. He looked as debauched as she felt, with his rosy lips swollen with spit and cheeks tinged with pink. “Are you gonna answer daddy, sweetheart?”

That knocked her into shape real fast.

“Yes, daddy, I’m so close. P-please let me come,” she whimpered. The whine in her voice pleased the two men, and Steve went back to exploring her mouth before she felt something poking against her asshole.

“Gonna let daddy put his cock in you, little girl?” Sam asked gently. His words had panic coursing through her system, a chilling realization like water being poured on her head and she began to wiggle around, trying to free Sam’s hand from her hip. Her arms weakly pushed at Steve’s chest, trying to push him as far away as he could, but the men only laughed at her flailing limbs. Y/N wanted to scream no to them, and despite her contrasting love-hate relationship with Sam’s fingers inside her cunt she knew it was time to go. It was laughable how much she would continue to say that to herself for the rest of the night. 

But Sam managed to sense her panic, knowing exactly what the issue was before harshly spanking her and effectively stopping her struggle. “Don’t worry, baby, I won’t come inside of you. I’m not risking knocking up a whore with my kids, I’ve got more dignity than that.”

He led the leaking tip of his dick down her crack, rubbing it along her slick entrance before pushing in with a groan. “Oh my fucking God, that is so hot.” Bucky admonished from the side. “Gotta get in on that soon.”

Steve chuckled against Y/N’s lips, pulling away with a strand of saliva connecting them. He adjusted himself up so his dick was centimeters from her face, a knee propped up on the bed for balance. “Gotta wait your turn, Buck, we all want a piece of her.” He noticed the way Y/N’s eyes were transfixed on his cock, the red mushroom head smeared with precome along the slit, nearly purplish veins standing out prominently on his shaft. Yeah, he couldn’t even deny that he was big because he already knew how many girls had dropped down on their knees for him. “Go ahead, sweetheart, open up those pretty lips for me.”

Almost too excitedly, she dropped her jaw, allowing him to slide his cock into the silky warmth of her mouth. As his hips started to thrust into her mouth, Sam’s started to do the same into her cunt. Both men moaned in tandem with their movements as Y/N’s worries faded away to the back of her mind as they stuffed her to the brim.

“You can come now, baby,” Sam nearly ordered, “go and cream on daddy’s cock- fuck, I know you’ve been waiting.”

It was a harsh bump of his head against her G-spot that sent her over the edge, walls clamping down with ferocity and milking him for all she was worth. Y/N reeled in the sunlight infested warmth that coursed through her body as she finally let go, whining around Steve’s dick as he continued to abuse her throat with long, deep thrusts. 

Bucky was still holding his orgasm off, fondling with his tight, heavy sac while his dick remained a painfully hard mess, glistening with precome. “I’m so glad I got to see you come, dolly, look so fucking pretty when you do.”

She couldn’t deny the little skip of her heart at the praise, just a few simple words that made her feel like a good little girl. But no, God-fucking no, she wasn’t supposed to let them make her feel this way. Guilt washed away that warmth in her chest just as quickly, knowing that her boyfriend was just waiting to come back to see her, finishing up his studies so that they could live their lives out together after college while she was getting her pussy and mouth absolutely wrecked by his co-workers. 

As soon as Y/N got her brain thinking straight again, Sam started moving inside of her again and she garbled out a strangled cry. “If you thought we were done here, baby,” Sam laughed, “you’ve got a lot left ahead of you.”

“We’re not leaving until all of us have come, brat.” Steve’s palm gripped the back of her skull roughly, pushing her head so far down on his dick that her nose was squished against his abdomen. “Greedy little bitch.”

Both men started to thrust into her again, and just like that she was back to being absolutely lost in desire and lust like the bitch in heat she was until there was a sudden shift in the air. So much that the sweat on her body began to cool her skin, Sam’s hands still gripping her hips so tightly she knew they’d leave marks that she would have to hide when she wore her favorite low-cut shorts. 

Bucky’s eyes seemed to drift from her tits moving with each movement of her hips, checking behind the door as if there were something lurking there, but she was too afraid to see for herself. If she stopped she would get spanked, and they’d probably prolong her second orgasm even further, and her pussy couldn’t handle any more subtle teasing.  

“Hey there, Parker, why don’t come on out here?”

But that, that was what made the hairs on Y/N’s neck rose, dread filling her to the fullest as she realized the implications of Sam’s words.

Peter had seen everything. Peter, her boyfriend, had seen three of his co-workers, three men who she barely knew, fuck her deep into his mattress. Peter, her boyfriend, had watched her get fucked into his mattress, without trying to stop them whatsoever.

She couldn’t tell if it was the guilt of cheating on her boyfriend or the freezing realization that he hadn’t done anything to stop the three men that hurt more. 

Yet Peter still walked from behind the door, dressed in a NYU hoodie and a pair of khakis slung low on his hips, just drawing attention to the sizable bulge that stretched out his zipper. His umber eyes, normally full of so much joy and love, were possessed by the same lust and darkness as the three men, as much as he tried to hide it behind a shyer facade. 

His eyes were trained on the tightness of how Y/N’s pussy was gripping Sam, her lips glossed over with come and spit wrapped around Steve’s dick. The girl stopped in her movements, her eyes no longer full of tears for just being gagged, but as soon as her mouth came to a halt around the base of his cock, the blond slapped her across the face. A sharp crack echoed around the room and though she couldn’t see him, she heard Bucky’s feral growl of pleasure at the whorish treatment she was receiving. 

“Didn’t say you could fucking stop, sweetheart, keep working on daddy’s cock.” No more words needed to be said as Steve gripped her hair once more, forcing himself farther back into her throat to the point where she couldn’t breathe. Sam’s thrusts were quickening, closer and closer to release as the sounds of the girl struggling to breath made his balls tighten. 

“Fucking shit, baby, you feel yourself squeezing my dick? I bet you like teasing daddy like that, don’t you?” One of his hands were brought down on her ass in a quick smack that resonated with Bucky, who was staving off his orgasm for something much sweeter than his hand. She was moaning raucously around the dick stuffed in her mouth, the vibrations sending jolts of pleasure up every nerve in Steve’s body as he came with the tip of his dick nearly being swallowed by Y/N’s throat. There was barely any time for her to fully down the thick come in her mouth before Sam was threatening to orgasm. “I’m gonna come so soon but you better fucking not, little girl, you hear me? Gotta let your daddy come before you, you ungrateful little bitch- oh.”

It was a really fucking close call, Sam’s dick pulling out of her with one quick movement before spilling pearly ropes of come onto Y/N’s spine. A high whine escaped her mouth, clit throbbing as she was so, so close to coming, and she was too far into her crazed pleasure to realize that she was letting three older men, men who fought to defend the universe from evil, use her as an over-glorified fleshlight. 

She couldn’t really blame them for calling her a cockdrunk whore. 

Bucky sauntered over to the bed, eyes trained on the pool of come centered around the base of her spine before flipping her over onto her back with his large hands and shoving three vibranium fingers back into her hole. She gasped and held onto his forearm as he continued to fingerfuck her to her second orgasm, eyes screwed shut in a delirious haze of contentment for being filled with at least something again. 

“Bucky, Bucky, Bucky, please-” Steve slapped her along the face, correcting her words immediately. “Daddy, daddy, please let me come.”

Bucky chuckled, tweaking one of her nipples with his flesh hand as he hovered over her face. “I don’t know, dolly, you’ve been a little naughty, callin’ me the wrong name, not listening to Stevie’s orders- don’t think you deserve to get what you want.”

A muffled whimper escaped her swollen lips, and he sighed in surrender. “Okay, dollface, go ahead and come on my fingers. Let me see how you wet ‘em up real good.”

Y/N’s hips bucked into his metal digits with finality, come leaking out of her cunt and soaking the sheets below her. Her sweat-glazed skin shone even against the darkening sky, and all Bucky could do was chuckle at how her chest rose quickly as she tried to catch her breath. He thought about teasing her clit again, just circling around the little bud of nerves to get a rise out of her, but he decided against it. Sam probably had better plans for her anyway. 

On the other hand, Y/N’s orgasm was starting to wear off as she noticed the hardened stare from the edge of the room. Her boyfriend.

“Peter, I…” Y/N made eye contact with him, suddenly noticing how mousy he looked in his own bedroom. 

“I nearly forgot you were here, Parker,” Sam smirked darkly. “Why don’t you come over here and fuck your little whore. I’m feeling a little generous today.”

Steve and Bucky nodded with the same infuriating smugness as Sam. The brunette boy opened his mouth to object to the degrading statement, but when he met his girlfriend’s eyes nothing needed to be said. There was no escaping this. Nothing he said mattered to the three older men, because really they had already gotten everything they wanted right in front of their disgusting, perverted eyes. 

He unbuckled his belt, letting the weight of it drop his khakis to the floor. Maybe if he’d known he would be forced into join a fivesome later that night he’d have picked any other boxers but the Ducktales one, but no one seemed to say a word about them, rather focusing on what they were failing to conceal. 

Peter’s cock had always been admirable to Y/N by its length and God, definitely its thickness. Curved upwards towards his abdomen with a vein running along the left side up to the bulbous head, it was definitely more than average. It was really just a shame he didn’t know how to use it well enough.

His shirt was pulled over his head just as quickly, and if Y/N knew any better she would say that he was excited to get to fuck her in front of the three men. He placed himself in between Y/N’s parted legs, standing in the same position as he had so many times before.

But when Y/N cried out in pain and pleasure as he slid into her, Peter knew that this time, it was different. This time three men, men that he used to trust with his life, stood on either side of him and his girlfriend and jerked their hands up and down their cocks as they watched her get fucked relentlessly. It wasn’t sweet, it wasn’t romantic, but he couldn’t really think when his thick cock was stuffed inside of her stimulated pussy, juices and come leaking out of her abused sex. 

“Go faster, Parker,” Steve instructed, his face contorted in pure pleasure. The pace of Peter’s thrusts sped up, and he threw Y/N’s ankles over his shoulders, hitting deeper inside of her, with the sound of her sobs only turning them all on more. “Oh, right there, shit, shit, shit-”

Steve came first, a low groan escaping his lips as streams of come landed on her tits, still bouncing with every movement of Peter’s hips. 

“Open up,” Sam gritted through his teeth, and Y/N obediently opened her mouth to let his bitter come coat the inside of her throat, some of it landing on her face and neck. The string of curses he let out made Peter thrust even faster into her, and he hated, absolutely despised the way it turned him on to see the three men use his girlfriend to their pleasure. But soon enough a hand pushed against his chest away from Y/N and he reluctantly pulled out.

“Move aside, kid,” Bucky instructed, “Wanna come inside of her.”

As he lined his gigantic cock up with her entrance, her eyes widened with fear. “No, please, I didn’t take my pills, I can’t- I won’t, please not inside-”

“Shut the fuck up, you slut.” Bucky’s fingers came to slap her clit harshly, and she cried out in pain. “You’re gonna be quiet and let me come wherever I damn want, right?”

He punctuated his last word as he thrust inside her, filling her up to the hilt with his girth. She was too drunk on the feeling of her cunt being filled up to argue again. It was painful, extremely so, even though two different cocks had been inside her overstimulated pussy already and Bucky stretched her out wide, his cock thicker with veins to hit every pleasure point. With her legs tossed around his tapered torso, he slid out until his very tip was left in her, then slammed back in with a small moan. The head of his cock relentlessly pounded into her cervix in a nearly soundless tempo and all Y/N could hear were her own gasps of pleasure, jaw-dropping moans that made drool slide back down her throat in her laid down position.

She turned her head to the side, and though her vision was bleary through the tears, she could see Sam and Steve watching Bucky fuck her while Peter, her boyfriend, her sweet, sweet boyfriend, was caught up fucking his hand to the sound of Bucky’s balls slapping against her ass. 

“Fuck, ‘m not gonna last much longer, dollface.” Bucky gasped. “You gonna come soon? You’re gonna come for daddy one more time. I think you’ve got a third one in you, you little fucking slut.”

“Shit, shit, daddy, please ‘m almost there,” Y/N wailed absentmindedly. A thumb came down to circle her clit quickly and she felt the coil in her stomach grow tighter and tighter, until she finally let out a high whine, finding her release as Bucky’s cock pulsed inside of her, ready to come just as easily as her. Her pussy clenched around his cock as she rode out her orgasm, fingers grasping at the sheets in order to find some sort of grounding. His come painted her walls white, and Bucky could’ve sworn there was no better feeling than feeling his blood warm in every vein as he finally let go. With stunted groans, his hips slowed its rhythm, lost in watching how his cock disappear into Y/N’s pussy, her slick juices coating his dick each time he pulled out. 

“Ah, fuck, dolly, you did so good for me. Pussy tight as a fuckin’ vice.” Bucky hugged her limp body close to his sweaty chest, letting his dick soften inside of her for a good few moments before pulling out. He tossed Y/N back onto the bed below him, barely even caring to clean the come dripping down her ribcage and out of her cunt before grabbing his boxers from the cabinet next to the bed. 

Steve was already buttoning his jeans up, checking the notifications on his phone before shoving it back into his pocket. The blond seemed to have better things to do so soon after, rushing his way to the door before pausing where Y/N laid to watch come drip out of her pussy. One more time he pushed Bucky’s come inside of her abused entrance, watching as it oozed out from behind his digits. “Look at you, fucking full of of his come. Such a goddamn whore,” he muttered under his breath.

Those were the last words he said to her before patting Bucky on the shoulder and leading him out of the opened door. 

Maybe Sam was a bit more kind, or affectionate at least. He was already dressed but visibly hard again beneath the thick denim of his pants, and he made sure Y/N knew it, taking her left hand and placing it over his dick. “You still got that effect on me, honey, even when you’re all fucked out like this.” He dragged his fingers through the thick ribbons of come that coated her chest, bringing them up to her mouth so she could taste. Even though she was more than exhausted, she wrapped her tongue around the two fingers that were pushed past her swollen lips, sucking them clean with a tired vengeance. Satisfied with her work, he kissed her chin one more time before leaving without so much as another word, slamming the door shut on his way out.

Click.

It ended exactly the way it started, the lock jostling into the doorknob just as easily as the high of Y/N’s final orgasm slipped away.

Stifling silence suffocated the room around them. Peter refused to meet her eyes, just as much as hers did his. She laid motionless on the bed with him standing at the foot, his dick soft and if she narrowed her bleary eyes just a bit, she could see how his knees were shaking. Neither of them were able to say anything, losing the ability to converse as soon as the three men left the room.

“Peter,” her voice was throaty after the rough fucking she took, “C-can you please get me a drink?”

The brown-haired boy looked down to meet her face, and she could finally see the reason that he had hid it from her. His eyes were red and bloodshot, snot running from his nose with tears running down his cheeks. She’d been so caught up in the after haze of the sex that she didn’t even notice how his bare chest was heaving so deeply, nearing hyperventalation. 

But still, he grabbed his boxers, pulling them over his weakened legs clumsily. “Y-yeah, what kind do you want, Mr. Stark has a ton-”

“I don’t care.” She cut him off firmly, a sharp tone in her voice as she rolled over on her side. Y/N tucked her knees to her chin, fingers running over the side of her neck which was marked with bruises and scratches. “I don’t fucking care.”

Without another word Peter slipped out of the room quietly, knowing better than to try to talk to her about what they had been forced to participate in. It wasn’t as if there was much to say anyways.

Rain pattered against the window. It was only six o’clock in the evening. Cars honked and beeped and Natasha’s Igor Stavinsky record played for its fiftieth round of the day, and to anyone else in the tower it was a normal night. Normal, just like the ones spent sitting on the couch with Bucky’s hand creeping up her leg or Sam’s hands groping her ass, but this time they’d made a move. 

The silence was far too much to handle, the unspoken truth of what she’d done with Bucky, Steve, Sam, and Peter finally hitting her, knocking the air out of her lungs as she suddenly struggled to breathe. Gripping her face, clawing at it like a goddamn wolf, Y/N began to cry. Silently at first, gradually growing into heartbroken sobs, she let her trodden pride carry her voice wherever it wanted to go. 

The men’s whispered words haunted her mere moments after they’d left the room, but most audibly she could hear a faint husk of a voice, Sam’s low moan in her ear looming in the dreadful silence of the room:

Thanks for sharing with us, baby.

#dark!bucky x reader #dark!bucky x y/n #dark!steve rogers smut #dark!sam wilson x reader #dark!stucky x reader #dark!bucky barnes smut #d #dark!bucky barnes x reader #dark!sam wilson #dark!bucky barnes #dark!steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #sam wilson x reader #sam wilson x you #steve rogers smut #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x reader smut #bucky fanfic #tw cheating #tw noncon #tw dubcon #18+ minors bye bye

[erodasfishtacos]

could u please do like a harry x youtuber/influencer!reader and like lots of fluff🥺

Hi bubbie! Here you go :)))

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: Language

Harry was panicking. His mum and sister were going to be here in less than two hours and he’s burnt the eggplant parmigiana he had worked tediously on. 

He grabbed what he had left in his fridge - ground beef, shredded cheddar cheese, and a little bit of bacon. 

It was the type of foods he usually strayed away from so sometimes when his shopper would bring this stuff home - he’d avoid it and admittedly sometimes it would go bad sitting in the fridge.

The singer pulls up YouTube onto his phone - hoping something would come up when he typed in the ingredients on the search bar.

He clicks on the first video by cookingwithnofucks. A chuckle at the name as an advertisement plays.

A cute, bubbly girl appears on screen in a beautiful modern kitchen. She has a shirt on that says ‘fuck the patriarchy and eat pizza’. A high ponytail and minimal makeup.

“Okay - today we’re making a cheeseburger casserole,” the girl chirps, “It’s a heart attack in a dish but it’s so fucking good.”

Harry finds himself smiling as he crinkles his nose - it sounds absolutely disgusting but he’s intrigued more by the girl on the screen.

“Shit, I forgot to introduce myself. Hiii, if you’re new - I’m Y/N and I do cooking shit. Subscribe to my channel and all that jazz,” she titters while cutting open her beef package.

Harry follows along step-by-step, shaking his head as she doesn’t describe the instructions nearly well enough and is generally all over the place.

It’s a fucking cooking channel and at one point the meat starts burning. She just laughs and says, “s’just a little crispy!” 

The casserole turns out looking even better than Y/N’s to be honest. It’s done in just the right amount of time for him to shower before his family arrives.

He makes sure to subscribe to her channel - eyebrows raising when he sees that she has 16 million subscribers.

Harry wanted to spend longer, looking at her social media but there was a fixed time so he locked his phone and went to get ready.

**

Anne - always the sweetheart just tells Harry that the casserole is delicious even as a bit of grease runs down her fork from the fatty meats.

Gemma wasn’t as kind, grimacing at the casserole and remarking, “You truly are turning into an American, huh?”

**

Laying in bed that night, Harry swipes back onto YouTube. Going back to the page he just subscribed to - under a pseudonym. He clicks on another video.

“Uh, okay. So I’m cooking...fuck, it’s called unicorn bark. It looks like a magical animal puke but it looks delicious so we’re going to try it.”

Harry realizes he’s been watching this girl cook for nearly an hour. Different videos from desserts to dinners.

She curses like a sailor, fucks up almost every recipe, and makes a mess everywhere. But she’s smiling and talkative which makes him quite memorized by her.

**

“I hate editing,” Y/N groans, letting her head fall dramatically against the desktop. Her best friend and dog looked at her oddly.

“I keep saying you need to hire someone, you stubborn bitch,” Laney retorts, clicking through her Instagram feed.

“Fuck off,” she tells her friend with no real heat. The video was almost fully edited - how to make spicy as fuck jalapeño poppers.

There is a calm silence for a while until Laney gasps, “Holy shit.”

“What is it?” Y/N asks, not really caring as she clicks her mouse to trim a segment.

“Harry fucking Styles just followed you on Instagram and Twitter!” Laney shouts, her dog - Rufus popping his head up in confusion.

Y/N looks at her friend to see if she’s really serious and sees no signs of deception. “Oh my god,” Y/N replies. She loved Harry Styles in One Direction and as a solo artist - a fangirl if you will.

Y/N was a well-known influencer and has run in the circles of many celebrities. She’s even met Liam Payne but she’s never been able to bump into Harry.

Her alerts tell her it to be true, she swallows as she looks back up at Laney, “He dm’ed me.”

“Open it! What did he say?” She squeals, squeezing herself on the chair next to her, peering over her shoulder at the phone.

Y/N is a bit nervous, trying not to have a mini aneurysm as she opens the message thread.

HarryStyles: Hello. Just wanted to let you know that your cheeseburger casserole recipe saved my ass last night. Cheers x

“He’s totally coming onto you,” Her friend states instantly, bouncing excitedly - she also had a bit of a crush on the singer.

It takes the two of them a minute to cool their shit before Y/N manages a reply.

Y/N/LN: Well I guess it’s only fair. Your songs have made a few of my nights much better. I’m a bit of a slut for Fine Line.

Harry laughs behind his screen at the cheeky reply he gets back. He’s usually never this forward - especially on social media where he likes to fly under the radar.

HarryStyles: Well if you fancy my music that much, I totally love for you to come to a show. I’m performing in New York City in two weeks.

“This has to be a joke, right?” Y/N sputters to her friend, eyes wide at the invite to a concert she already had tickets to.

Y/N/LN: I’m not going to lie, I already have tickets to the show. However, I don’t have any backstage passes to meet the man of the hour. Do you know someone who can hook me up?

It does wonders for Harry’s narcissism to know that she already had tickets for his concert. Was he really going to do this? He hasn’t met up with some like this since his One Direction days.

He had to remind himself - she may just be friendly and take this as a totally casual interaction. Which would be normal, Harry really shouldn’t be so infatuated with someone he’s watched cook on social media.

HarryStyles: I think I can arrange that. Shoot me your number? I’ll have them sent digitally to you with instructions on how to get backstage.

Y/N is a bit dumbfounded at how fast they agreed to meet up. A harmless backstage tour - he could just be a fan of hers and totally not interested, right?

**

Over the next few weeks, they never really stop texting. Harry sends her pictures of the recipes he copies off her channel - that usually always look better than the original. He sends her clips of him goofing around during tour rehearsal. FaceTimes her when he’s finally home for the night.  

She sends him videos of her watching Harry Styles Best Moment Part Five. A few photos she snaps throughout the city of him on billboards and buildings, in Times Square. YN facetimes him when she’s frustrated with filming or watched a sad movie.

It didn’t make sense to either of them how seamlessly they’d clicked - especially without meeting. They were a perfect balance for each other. Harry - laidback, organized, level-headed. Y/N - eccentric, all over the place, adventurous. 

Jeff had told him that he’s been gaining media attention from his social media interactions with Y/N. They like each other’s photos, begin following each other’s friends, and comment goofy things on their posts.

“Listen, I have a great idea,” Y/N begins - which Harry learned is never good. “You should film a video with me sometime.”

Y/N knew she was going out on a limb and instantly regretted the questions she’d been building the courage to ask for days when it’s quiet on his end. There’s static for a moment and Y/N needs to fill the silence.

“It was - I was just, uh, I know you’re probably too busy. I was -“ She stutters, embarrassment flooding her.

Harry cuts her off, “I’d love to.”

“Yo-you would?” She asks timidly. Was she really going to have Harry Styles in her apartment? If so, should she take down her poster?

He laughs sweetly, “Why do you sound so surprised? I can’t wait to come to New York, love.”

Y/N giggles, “Not the fact that you’re performing in front of a sold out crowd at MSG? I don’t think seeing me will top that.”

“I’ve been looking forward to meetin’ you in person since I came across your channel. You so lovely,” Harry replies, his voice a little softer but more serious.

“I’m nervous,” Y/N admits, picking at a thread in her jeans.

“Me too,” Harry murmurs, despite not wanting to admit it - he wanted her to know this was new territory for both of them. He didn’t want her to think that this was something that he did often. But a little too prideful to admit it’s the first time he’s ever done something quite like this.

“What if you don’t like me?” Y/N whispers, she...well she didn’t compare to the models he’s been seen with before. She’s regretfully fell into the rabbit hole of looking up his past flings and relationships.

Harry barks out a disbelieving laugh, “You can’t be serious, darling. I’ve been gone for you since I saw you burn that ground beef.”

**

Harry was having a bad day - scratch that. An awful one. He tried to go get coffee at eight in the morning and got bombarded by fans, he left the shop without even ordering. They followed him back to his car and it took him fifteen minutes to pull out.

His favorite Mickey Mouse Gucci suitcase he was bringing along on tour had busted. The zipper unraveling and the trim falling off as a result. It was a one-of-a-kind.

Then he’d been stuck on a Skype meeting about tour merchandise with a group of business partners for the last three hours - all he wanted was a fucking nap.

When Y/N’s contact vibrated across his screen, he’s itching to answer but declines as he needs to give these people his attention.

When she calls again, Harry feels a prickle of annoyance. It’s not even at her - to be quite honest. It’s just the shitty day and everything’s piling up.

He always got like this before he kicked off a tour - stress level maxed out and his ability to handle minor incidents nearly shot.

I’m busy

Okay! Sorry, just have a super exciting surprise for you, bub! 

I really do not feeling like talking. I’d rather be left alone.

Oh, alright. Hope everything’s okay! Do you still want to facetime later?

Harry leaves her on read because he doesn’t want to slip up and take out his frustration on her. He’d been known to do that and he didn’t want her to think he was anything but besotted with her.

**

Y/N feels a little hesitant as she begins the uploading process to her channel. The red loading bar told her it’d be twenty-minutes before it’s going to be posted to her 16 million subscribers - one of them being Harry himself. 

Twenty-minutes for her to back out and cancel the upload. She starts having doubts about it when Harry never replies to her text which is unlike him. 

She takes Rufus out to avoid staring at the loading screen with unnecessary anxiety and uneasiness.

**

Harry is just getting home from a business dinner with the touring company’s management team. The tension and anxiety from today piling up on his shoulders and he just wants to call Y/N and crash in bed. 

He tosses his keys in the little bowl in the entry and kicks off his dingy white vans to the side. His phone dings with an alert from Gemma.

You two are the literal cutest ever. It’s quite gross.

Harry slides onto a stool in his kitchen, confused by the text message before she’s sending the link to him.

Fine Line Inspired Cupcakes!

Harry isn’t quite sure why his heart starts pounding furiously in his chest. A sinking feeling in his stomach when he realizes that this was probably the surprise she was excited about.

He clicks on the thumbnail.

“Hiiii, it’s Y/N. Okay, well today we are going to bake some Fine Line inspired cupcakes. And if you haven’t listened to the album - get your ass out from rock you’re living under and stream it on Spotify!”

She has her hair down in long, waves and a loose cropped shirt that says TPWK in rainbow embroidery.

Harrys mouth is dry and he can’t take his fucking eyes away from the screen. 

“Soo, I was thinking the first batch would be cherry flavored? ‘Cause he has a song titled ‘Cherry’. Let’s start there. First - I need to find my measuring cups.”

In true Y/N fashion, she scours her kitchen - cussing and yanking stuff out of her neatly organized cabinets before huffing and storming off to the side.

She comes back into view, a little frazzled but smiling when she holds up the ring of plastic measuring spoons, visible bite marks notched into the material.

“My asshole of a dog had a little snack,” Y/N shows the camera before shrugging, “Let’s get this shit started. Okay, you’re going to need one cup of sugar - no wait, two? I can’t read my fucking handwriting.”

Harry’s absolutely enamored by this scatter-brained, giggly girl who manages to produce cute blue and pink cupcakes that very vaguely resembled his album cover. His heart felt a million times too big for his chest.

He was enraptured for the entirety of the thirty minute video without taking his eyes away once.

To be honest, he hadn’t felt this way since his last relationship which was over a year ago at this point.

It’s not even a thought as he’s requesting a FaceTime with Y/N. 

She answers after a few rings. She has a green face mask painted on her nose, chin, and forehead with gold eye masks under each eye. She is so fucking ridiculous it’s not even funny. 

What is even more ridiculous is how gone Harry is realizing he is for her. She was quirky, unfiltered, carefree. If he was honest - he hadn’t met a girl like that in a very long time - especially a well-known influencer.

“Hi! How was your day, grumpy?” Y/N asks brightly, making a goofy face as the mask begins to tighten and crack on her skin. Not holding the earlier conversation against him and deciding to just move forward. She understood how stressful it can be.

“M’sorry. I was a bit grumpy,” He admits, “I loved your new video, darling. Did you make those just f’me?”

He can tell she’d be blushing if her face wasn’t covered, a bit bashful as she mutters, “You already know I did it for you.”

“You’re too sweet to me, only six days until we meet,” Harry replies, voice taking on a slow, lazy drawl. 

“Six days,” Y/N repeats, eyes crinkling as she smiles with excitement.

**

“Is this outfit too much?” Y/N panics. Even though there’s literally nothing she can do about it - they’re already walking towards the backstage entrance of the massive arena. It’s still about two hours until the show starts but Harry requested her to come earlier.

Laney sighs, “For the millionth time, you look fucking sexy and Harry’s going to want to rail you right when he sees you.”

Y/N shoves her lightly with a faux annoyance as they meet up with a burly man who’s blocking the entrance to the backstage hallway and rooms.

She gives him their names and pulls up the passes on her phone before he’s nodding with any expression and letting them pass.

They’re not quite sure where to go from here so they begin to wander down the long hallway toward what looks to be the main area that people are milling about.

Y/N is nearly on the ground when someone rounds the corner without looking and walks right into her. Both of them let out huffs of air as they collide and attempt to stabilize themselves.

But there are large hands grasping her arms and holding her steady. In typical Y/N fashion she’s already cursing, “fuckin like a brick wall, look out next time.”

Then she’s looking up to Harry staring back down at her with an amused expression. He doesn’t let go of her and instead tugs her against his bare chest. He’s warm and a bit sweaty - like he’d just worked out. He was only in a pair of thin, running shorts, nike tennis shoes, and a little clip holding his hair off of his face.

Y/N can’t help but wrap her arms around his waist, returning the embrace and amazed by how right it feels to be in his arms. Her face tucks right against his collarbone and it’s like they’d known each other for years.

Pictures and videos don’t do this man justice. He’s gorgeous - sharp edges and dark inked skin. Tall and muscular but dimples that are carved in his cheeks. 

“Nice to meet you, m’Harry,” Harry rumbles, removing one hand from Y/N’s shoulder to reach out his hand to her friend.

Laney shakes his hand before asking, “Laney. I’ll leave you two lovebirds be. Where’s the food?”

Harry chuckles against Y/N’s wavy hair, “Down the hall to the left.”

Laney’s trailing off without another glance, she was very food motivated despite her skinny frame. Also not wanting to intrude of the very personal first moments of their meeting.

The popstar pulls back to look down at the girl he’s fallen for in mere weeks. She’s as beautiful as he thought she'd be - if not more. He can’t help himself, “Would it be too forward to kiss you?”

Y/N smiles widely, running a hand along his jawline, “I’ve wanted you to kiss me since you stayed up on FaceTime with me until two in the morning as I cried after watching The Notebook - despite me seeing it a million times.”

Harry ducks forward to press his lips softly to her, large hands come to cup the side of her face as they connect. He’s so gentle as he moves his mouth against hers. In true Y/N fashion, she’s bold and has no hesitation slipping her tongue into his mouth.

He’s so fucking in love with her. It doesn’t make much sense - it’s definitely not logical but he’s realizing that’s okay.

“Oii, get a room!” Someone shouts from down the hallway teasingly.

Harry flips them the middle finger and pulls back, pink lips swollen and puffy, dimples on full display, “Let me take you out to dinner after the show, darling.”

“You going to wine and dine me, Styles?” Y/N giggles, unable to contain the pleasant warmness he’s spreading through her body. 

“Mmm, have t’make sure you’ll want to keep me,” Harry murmurs happily against her lips once again, pressing kiss after kiss to her to make sure she’s real, “Definitely want to keep you.”

Y/N bites teasingly at his bottom lip, hand planted on the soft but firm skin of his stomach, “You’re never getting rid of me, hope you know that.”

“Was hoping you’d say that, now let me introduce you to my band.”

                                  -- ---- ---- -- 1 year later - -- --- --- --

“Hi bitches! Today is a super special day. We have the one, the only Harry Styles filming with us. I know that’s not really that special since he’s on here all the time with me. But we’re celebrating our one year anniversary!” Y/N smiles, bumping hips with Harry who stands dutifully next to her. 

Anyone viewing can see the absolute heart-eyes and adoration he has for the girl standing next to him. He’s still as lovestruck and gone for her as he was the first time they met. Harry’s fans were thrilled - for the first time in years, he’d opened up again.

They weren’t very public on social media beside’s tagging each other in memes and posting the occasional picture. Y/N was constantly uploading cooking videos from wherever in the world she was with Harry on his tour, she’d also begin making vlogs about different foods she’s been experiencing.

---

“Okay, so here in Peru - they’re known to have this really fucking spicy beef with noddles. So obviously, I’m going to make Harry try it first,” Y/N laughs as she props the camera up on the side of the table on a napkin holder.

Harry - who has a concert in a few hours - frowns at the steaming dish in front of him, “Darling, I don’t want to try it first. It’s going to burn my mouth. Not gonna be able to sing.”

“You’re sucha baby sometimes,” Y/N rolls her eyes, slurping up the noodles with her fork while making a silly face at her boyfriend. She pulls back, straight-faced, “It’s not hot at all. Tastes amazing, though.”

Harry takes that as an initiative to shovel a spoonful into his mouth. It only takes half a moment until his taste buds erupt in fiery flames from the spices, “You bloody little brat, y’tricked me! It’s so fuckin’ hot!”

Y/N smiles widely, laughing much too loudly in the restaurant when Harry chugs the glass of water next to the plate while glaring at his love. “I’m sorry, s’just to easy with you, lovie,” She replies, leaning over the table to press a kiss to his lips. 

He’s a sucker for her and kisses her right back despite his mouth being an inferno. His heart was on fire for her and that burned much more intensely.

---

“No, love. The instructions say baking soda, not baking powder. They’re not the same thing,” Harry sighs, attempting to read her scribbled, sloppy handwriting. She’d already spilled milk on half of the paper.

“S’interchangeable, right?” Y/N hums, cracking an egg into the bowl and Harry automatically knows to look to fish out the eggshells that’d she’d let slip in because she sucks at cracking eggs but always wants to do it.

Harry reaches over her, grabbing the vanilla extract and a teaspoon, “It’s not, baby. Lemme do this real quick.”

“Will you make me a grilled cheese after this?” She asks, nuzzling into his side and wrapping her arms around his waist as he finishes adding the wet ingredients to their bowl. Harry stopped questioning her thought process a long time ago.

Harry swipes his finger into the mixture of icing off to the side and rubs it right onto her nose, cackling at her pout and squeaking when she pinches at the fleshy skin of his hips. She in turn dips her finger into the sugary cream and pops it right into her mouth.

Harry eyes darken, watching her lips purse as she sucks off the icing. It was a dirty move on Y/N’s part and she knows it. It has her boyfriend dragging an icing-covered thumb along her collarbone before leaning down to slowly lick up the sugary trail with his tongue.

When Y/N slides her fingers into his hair and lets out a pretty moan, Harry’s standing back up, trailing over to the tripod and saying into the camera, “We’ll be back after a little commercial break,” and is then turning off the record button.

It takes little to no time for Harry to have Y/N’s bum on the countertop, mouth on her neck, and hand in-between her thighs.

And when they finally posted a very edited final cut of the video - well there may be a couple of fans who notice the how flushed Y/N is halfway through and a lovely purple mark on Harry’s neck that wasn’t there in the beginning of the video.

#harry styles #harry styles writing #harry styles fanfic #harry styles writing request #harry styles fluff #harry styles x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles fic rec #harry styles prompt #harry styles x influencer y/n #harry styles smut #harry styles drabble

[makeste]

“but I thought about how I needed to say this”

a.k.a. yet another meta dissection of The Apology. I actually wrote most of this up on Friday night based on the original Japanese (@pikahlua​ has an excellent translation up here, and I also used @hanashimas’ translations as a reference as well), but I wanted to wait until the official release, though that turned out to be a mixed bag to say the least lol.

I would also recommend reading @pikahlua​ and @class1akids​’ breakdowns of this scene (here and here, respectively), because they are excellent, and because if any scene deserves to have as many meta breakdowns written about it as possible, it’s this one.

anyway so here goes.

Caleb did a more accurate job with this than the fanscan, even if he did try his best to take us out of the seriousness of the moment by throwing in that swiss cheese line lol. anyway so there are two things I want to talk about here. the first is the line about Izuku not remembering, which I thought was a nice touch. of course he doesn’t remember what Kacchan said back then. he wasn’t exactly in the soundest emotional state after seeing one of the people he cares about most taking a near-fatal blow that was meant for him. I’d be shocked if he remembers anything about the aftermath (including the way he flew into a mindless rage afterwards) right up until the point when he entered the OFA Interstellar Party Void with Tomura. anyway, so I thought that was a nice callback.

and speaking of emotional states, the other thing I wanted to talk about is the part that Caleb got right which the fan scanlation didn’t. “but I had more to say.” in other words, “stop trying to win on your own” wasn’t just a one-liner; it was meant to be the beginning of a much longer speech. “there were other things that I needed to say.”

like, can we just stop and talk about that for a second. because basically what this means is that in that instant, when Kacchan pushed Deku out of the way and got impaled, his one and only thought was that he needed to apologize to Deku. his life was presumably flashing before his eyes, he had no idea if he was going to survive or not, and the only thing on his mind was how urgently he needed to make things right with his former childhood friend.

moving on!

so I have a confession to make, which is that I am relieved to see Katsuki describing this as the reason why he bullied Deku, as opposed to Horikoshi trying to retcon it into some sort of “secretly he was just trying to protect him and keep him out of harm’s way because he was worried” thing, which ngl would not have gelled very well with me. the thing is that I’m really not a fan of the whole “Kacchan Did Nothing Wrong” mentality that some fans seem to have. like, I have seen all sorts of convoluted attempts to find excuses for Katsuki’s shitty behavior, but in my view those attempts undermine what I love about his character in the first place. Katsuki is such a great character specifically because he is not perfect. his redemption arc is so compelling because he was such a giant asshole at the start. he was completely at fault, and he acknowledges this, and takes full responsibility for it. and that is fucking fantastic.

his arc is so great because it doesn’t rely on garnering sympathy by giving him a Tragic Past, or by trying to foist the blame for his behavior over on someone else. it’s an arc that acknowledges that redemption isn’t something you achieve by making people feel sorry for you; it’s something you have to earn by actively working to change and do better. and by forgoing the “misunderstood/tragic past” route, Horikoshi is making a statement that anyone can go down the wrong path, but that more importantly, anyone can also choose at any time to turn away from said path. there is only one requirement for doing so, and that is realizing that you’ve done wrong, and deciding that you want to change.

anyway, so in chapter 284 Kacchan of course had that whole speech about Deku not taking himself into account, and mentioned how that made him want to keep his distance. and a good chunk of fandom took this to mean that Katsuki’s bullying was actually a misguided response to Deku’s reckless tendencies -- sort of an “if I show him how weak and powerless he really is, I can get him to accept the reality that he’s quirkless, and that being a hero will just get him hurt or killed” type of thing. and I won’t lie, for a good while I was wondering myself if Horikoshi was really going to go down that route. and like I said, I am honestly relieved that he didn’t. not only for the reasons stated in the previous paragraph, but also because the message that would have sent -- that there are certain circumstances in which bullying can almost be excused because the bully had Good Intentions and was just trying to save the other person from themselves, and so it Wasn’t That Bad, Actually -- is all kinds of fucked up to say the least. so yeah, I’m glad we ended up steering well clear of that.

(ETA: this post was long enough already so I edited out the 3 additional paragraphs I originally wrote analyzing the dialogue from 284. but just to be clear, I’m not trying to imply that Kacchan worrying about Deku’s recklessness is a retconned thing that Horikoshi only threw into the story recently, because there are multiple instances throughout the story where he clearly is worried and in total denial of it. but I firmly believe those feelings are not what led to the bullying. they’re two separate things. Kacchan worrying about Deku is what prompts him to yell at him in chapter 1 when Deku comes to save him. but it’s not what incited him to burn his notebook and taunt him earlier in that same chapter. that action had a much meaner and more selfish motivation behind it, and I’m glad Horikoshi didn’t try to change it up last minute, because it wouldn’t have felt right.)

thankfully as of this chapter I think we can safely cross that out as a possibility, as we’re given the true explanation straight from Katsuki himself. and the truth is that he bullied Deku out of insecurity and jealousy and fear and intolerance. there was nothing noble about it. there were no good intentions concealed in his actions. there are no justifications given, no excuses offered, and no mitigating circumstances to be considered, other than the fact (which neither he nor Horikoshi bring up) that he was and is still a child, and that children make mistakes.

it’s an explanation that challenges many of fandom’s ideas on who is and isn’t eligible to be redeemed. there is no Ozai in Katsuki’s backstory. there’s no great tragedy that he spent a lifetime trying to rise above. the only villain in Katsuki’s story is Katsuki himself. the only darkness that he has to overcome is his own. and it’s challenging, because I think many people believe the only way someone can be redeemed for doing bad things is if bad things happen to them in return. but what Horikoshi is saying here is that that’s not the case. bad doesn’t erase bad. and the one and only way to truly earn redemption is by doing good.

and that’s what makes this such a phenomenal scene for me. by not shying away from Katsuki’s flaws and failings, and having him take full responsibility for them, Horikoshi keeps the apology from being self-serving, and underscores the true depth of Katsuki’s character development. the level of self-awareness he has here is something most people can only dream of. which is very fitting, as that’s perhaps the most important takeaway from his character arc -- that it’s only by acknowledging your own weaknesses and flaws that you can learn to overcome them and reach your full potential.

one last thing to point out here, which is that in the panel where Katsuki finally acknowledges his terrible treatment of Deku, Deku is not even visible. instead, Horikoshi drew the panel from a perspective that makes it appear that Katsuki is addressing this particular line not just to Deku, but to all of his classmates.

again, he shows him taking full responsibility and admitting his wrongdoings in front of the people whose opinions and approval he cares about most. and just to clarify in case there’s any confusion from Caleb’s translation, Kacchan’s wording makes it very clear that he wasn’t just “mean” to Deku, but that he full-on bullied him (he uses the same verb -- “ijimeru” (苛める) -- that he did back in chapter 284). there’s no attempt to downplay his actions here.

moving on now, this chapter also reaffirmed another thing about Deku and Kacchan’s relationship which I was glad to see revisited -- Kacchan’s unwavering belief in Deku’s ability. this is one of those paradoxical things about their relationship which I’ve always been fascinated by, but which is also kind of hard to explain, because I don’t want it to come off like I’m trying to put a positive spin on something which was unequivocally awful. like, please don’t think I’m trying to say that Katsuki’s bullying of Deku was in any way a good thing. but that being said, there’s also a strange irony at play here, which is that Katsuki’s jealousy and insecurity also betray the fact that even at his very worst, he never once underestimated Deku. he has always believed in Deku’s strength, even when that strength pissed him off and made him afraid and uneasy.

no one else -- not All Might, or even Deku’s own mom -- believed from the get-go that Deku could become a hero. but Katsuki never once counted him out, even when he was calling him a pebble in his shoe. he confesses here that even though he “tried to act superior by rejecting [Deku]”, in truth he was never able to shake the feeling that Deku was above him. long before he ever understood the concept of “win to save”, he knew instinctively that there was a strength in Deku’s heart that couldn’t be measured, and which had the potential to surpass even his own strength. and I’ve always felt that this was so important, because it’s the one aspect of their early relationship that hinted that on some level, however subconscious, Katsuki held the same type of faith in Deku that Deku always held in him. it was one of the few things that hinted at there being a possible path towards reconciliation one day. and it paved the way for the most important shift in their relationship to date, when Katsuki finally realized who Deku got his quirk from, and responded not with resentment or spite, but with acceptance.

moving on, I also really love the way we see them portrayed at the different stages of their childhood throughout this speech, and how it perfectly lines up with the dialogue. from small children (when Katsuki talks about his insecurities first manifesting), to middle schoolers (when he talks about the bullying), to high schoolers (when he talks about the past year and everything he’s learned at U.A.). Horikoshi really didn’t have to go that hard, but he did, and that’s why we love him.

and then we finally get to That Part.

where do I even start with this there are so many things omg.

the bow. this is the one and only time Katsuki has ever bowed to anyone of his own volition as far as I recall. and this absolutely is a bow, just to be clear, even though his form is straight-up garbage (very Kacchan-esque, with his feet and arms spaced apart because he’s still a punk after all). this is Kacchan showing more humility and respect than he’s ever shown to anyone else in his entire life.

regarding “Izuku”, I actually have mixed feelings about this to tell the truth. I think it was a good call here because it was incredibly effective in setting the tone and showing just how serious Kacchan is. however if he continues to use “Izuku” rather than “Deku” from here on out, that would give the impression in hindsight that all his past usage of “Deku” really was meant as an insult, which would undermine some of my favorite scenes. I would really like to believe that since DvK2 or thereabouts, Kacchan has (mostly) been using “Deku (affectionate)” rather than “Deku (useless loser)”, lol. but if he switches to the “nicer” name on a permanent basis following his apology, it implies that the previous nickname was indeed being used cruelly. and so honestly I hope this was just a one-time thing, because I do think that in Katsuki’s mind, the name “Deku” hasn’t been meant as a slight to him for a long time now.

“my truth/this is what I truly feel” -- the word Katsuki uses in Japanese is honne (本音), and if you’re familiar with the concept of honne/tatemae, that’s the same “honne” he’s talking about here. it means that he’s casting aside all of his walls and facades and expressing what he truly feels. and of course, one of the fascinating things about Katsuki’s character is that he’s the exact opposite of most people in that he chooses to put his meanness on full display to the public, and ironically it’s the kindest parts of himself which he tends to keep the most carefully guarded and hidden away. this also means that while his rage and anger are very often insincere and put on just for show, those relatively few occasions where he lets his humanity truly shine through are pretty much 100% genuine, as is the case with this one here.

and Deku’s face says it all when it comes to how powerful those moments can be as a result.

and this, right here, is why it wasn’t enough for Katsuki to atone solely through his actions, and why he needed to actually say the words as well. it’s not that the words are more important; obviously the actions are far and away the most important part, and carry far more meaning. but the reason why Katsuki needed to say the words as well is simply because Izuku needed to hear them. needed to, and deserved to, because this is one of the most important people in the world to him.

and so he deserves to know that the relationship isn’t just one-sided, and that he is just as important to Kacchan as Kacchan is to him. he deserves to know that Kacchan understands how horribly he treated him, and that he’s sorry for it. and he deserves to know that Kacchan, without any expectation of it changing their relationship -- meaning that he will continue to feel this way regardless of what Izuku says or does from here on out -- cares about him. now more than ever, with AFO out there doing everything in his power to make Izuku feel as alone as possible, this is something that he really, really needed to hear.

so this part has some interesting wordplay which neither Caleb’s translation nor the fan scanlation was really able to get across. basically, in the Japanese version, when Katsuki talks about “those ideals”, Horikoshi uses the kanji for “ideal”, but pronounces it as “All Might.” obviously the meaning of this isn’t too hard to decipher, as we all know how much both boys admire All Might. to them, he absolutely is synonymous with the Ideal. so this is a way of showing that respect they both have towards him, even as Katsuki goes on to point out the one fatal flaw that All Might was never able to overcome.

and speaking of interesting wording, as others have noted, at this point in his speech Katsuki switches from “temee” (which he was using earlier during the “your strengths and my weaknesses” part) to “omae” (“omae” being a less insulting word for “you”, though still very manly and tough-sounding), which is definitely a big deal. though fwiw this is not the first time he’s used “omae” for Deku (he switches to it briefly right after DvK2, when he tells Deku “you had the strongest guy lay the groundwork for you -- don’t lose”, and then later when they’re walking back to the dorms and he says he’ll learn and get stronger by watching everyone around him just like Deku did). it’s definitely a good choice on Horikoshi’s part though, as it makes this last part of the speech sound more earnest and sincere.

just a quick note, he does indeed use a plural pronoun here, as in “the obstacles that you can’t overcome, we will overcome.” but as @pikahlua​ pointed out, the “we” here is ambiguous -- it could either mean “we” as in class 1-A -- “we will overcome them for you” -- OR it could mean “we” as in all of them -- class 1-A and Deku. “we will overcome them together.” idk about you, but I know which one gets my vote.

anyway, and so this is the line that finally wins Deku over and allows him to let go of his fears, however briefly. what I love about this is Kacchan’s utter conviction. one thing that Caleb’s translation doesn’t quite get across is Kacchan’s use of the word morenaku -- “without exception” -- when he talks about how they’re going to save everyone and win. it echoes that same sentiment he showed back during the Joint Training arc -- that it’s not a perfect victory unless they save everyone. every last person. and he explicitly lists Deku among their number, just so there can be no doubt.

and Deku’s response to this (or at least his thoughts, since he’s not really able to get many words out) pretty much brings everything full circle here.

he acknowledges that everyone else has gotten ahead of him. which is especially meaningful given who he’s standing directly across from. because for most of the series, as we all well know, it’s been Kacchan who was woefully lagging behind Deku in the character growth department. but now Deku himself is acknowledging that not only has Kacchan finally caught up at last, but that he and the others have surpassed him. which is only temporary, I should add, as I have zero doubt that Deku will catch up again soon. but the fact remains that just as Deku’s rapid increase in strength and skill left Kacchan scrambling to keep up earlier in the series, Kacchan’s extraordinary character development has now left Deku in that same position. as All Might once put it, “when he’s starting at level one, and you’re already at level 50, it’s only natural that you’ll be growing at different rates.”

and what’s so wonderful about this though is that the two of them are finally approaching that point where they’ve both caught up to each other and are finally starting to level out. Deku is a full-on badass, and Kacchan is out here talk-no-jutsuing with the best of them. the two of them have been chasing and chasing after each other this entire time, and now they’re finally just about ready to meet in the middle at long last, with each of them fully embodying both of those two crucial aspects -- win, and save.

just about. because Deku still needs some help catching up. but seeing as help has already been offered -- and accepted -- I can’t imagine it will be very long now, and I can’t wait to see him finally overcoming those fears and doubts with his friends by his side. it’s going to be such a powerful moment.

and last but not least,

or, as I prefer,

you had one job, Caleb. flkjsdlk.

but at least this provides a good opportunity to note that unlike the “we’ll help you handle it” line earlier in the speech, here the phrasing is left up to interpretation, as he doesn’t use a pronoun. so it could be “we know”, or, as the fan scanlation put it, “I know.” or it could be both. regardless, it’s good stuff.

anyway, and so Deku passes out, and in the process Horikoshi gives us one last parting metaphor, just in case anyone still thinks Kacchan is all talk because they haven’t been paying attention for the past 322 chapters (more likely than you think). once again, Katsuki’s actions speak louder than his words (even his nice words) ever could: he is literally there to catch Deku when he falls.

so that’s it! my sincere thanks to anyone who actually read through all of my endless ramblings about this scene which I have been waiting for since day one. props to Horikoshi for taking on an impossibly difficult task, and pulling it off with all of the emotion and care and nuance that I’ve come to expect from his writing. imo he delivered on every single level with the exception of the aftermath, which I don’t consider to have actually happened yet. Deku’s part of this is definitely a “to be continued.” but yeah, as far as Kacchan’s part goes, 10/10. so fucking proud of this kid.

#bnha 322 #bakugou katsuki #midoriya izuku #bakudeku #bnha meta #bakugou meta #deku meta #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha

[v-hope]

With You

Pairing: Jeon Jeongguk x Reader

Genre: Fluff, smut, College!AU, established relationship

Word Count: 5.2k

Summary: Although trying to fight it, Jeongguk can’t help but become insecure about your relationship after your ex best friend starts filling his head with lies about you and Taehyung, his best friend who you just so happened to be out with that day. Good thing is, you’re right there with him to reassure him you want him and only him.

—Alternatively, the one in which during a heated make out session you find out your boyfriend is a virgin, and decide to help him get himself off.

Warnings: Heavy making out, light body touching (?), dry humping, confident Guk and shy/awkward Guk keep switching places, handjob, blowjob. And yup, Guk’s (still) a virgin.

A/N: Helloo, this from part 28 of my Social Media AU ‘Tiger Flower’, but I guess you can still read it if you haven’t read the full story lol. So this was supposed to be a 2k drabble like the ones I always write but I got a bit carried away 🤡 I hope you enjoy! 💕 ALSO, someone asked me to bold the beginning and ending of the smut part(s), so if you don’t wanna read the smut just look for the bolded words and skip what’s in between lol.

Running his hands through his face as the elevator’s doors opened, Jeongguk started walking through the hallway to his place, head lowered as he absently looked in his pocket for the keys to the apartment.

The conversation he had with Sooyeon was still going through his mind over and over. Although he had managed to sound confident enough through the texts they had exchanged and he had put her in her place —along with blocking her ass just like he had wanted to ever since the first time she brought you up into the conversation—, he could not deny her words did hit home.

Taehyung was definition of your type. Outgoing, talkative, funny, handsome. The life of the party, in other words. Something he was not, and something he would never be, considering he did not show up to parties at all if it wasn’t because he was either forced to by his friends or because you would be there.

Taehyung could most definitely show you a good time, whereas he, on the other hand…

No, fuck that. You were dating him. He was your boyfriend. He, Jeon Jeongguk. That was all he could find comfort in.

Then again, you were not with him right then. You were somewhere else with Taehyung. As friends, but still. And then again, just like he had a high school crush on you and found himself falling all over again three years into college, so had you with Taehyung right before dating him. Would it really be that hard for you to fall for him a third time when the two of you were still so close?

He shook his head, as if trying to shake his thoughts away. Don’t let Sooyeon get to you, Y/N’s with you for a reason. Don’t let Sooyeon get t—

“Hey…”

Before his head could keep on torturing him, your voice brought him back out of his small trance, fixing his wide doe eyes on you for two seconds before he took in his surroundings, only then realising he had already reached his apartment’s door.

Staring back at you, his eyes lit up.

“Hey,” he said softly. “What… What are you doing here?”

You shifted nervously in your place. “You sounded kinda off through texts, so I just wanted to check up on you”.

He nodded quietly, fighting the huge smile that was threatening with forming on his lips.

Because you were there. With him.

“You didn’t, um…” his eyes travelled to the door for a second before they were back on you. “Joon-ie hyung didn’t open the door for you?”

A small laugh escaped your lips at the way his eyebrows had furrowed, ready to fight his roommate for leaving you waiting out there for God knows how long. “I didn’t call on the door” you explained, causing his eyebrows to knit further together in utter confusion. “I didn’t know if you wanted me here at all, so I thought I’d just wait outside in case you wanted to be alone and asked me to g—”

Your words were cut off by a sweet kiss being pressed to your lips. Although taken aback the first second, you smiled when he cupped your face to press his mouth deeper against yours.

“What was that for?” you smiled once he pulled away, eyes still closed as you felt his nose gently bumping yours.

“I’m just happy you’re here” he breathed contently.

“That’s good to hear” you sheepishly admitted, resting your hands on his chest. “I honestly thought you would ask me to leave”.

He shook his head no, pecking your lips before he pulled you into his arms. “Don’t be silly, you know I always want to be with you”.

You took in a shaky breath, feeling all the tension you had been building up until then leave your body for good, and then wrapping your arms tightly around him as well. “Yeah, but you sounde—”

“Shh,” he hushed you, pressing a brief kiss to your neck. “I want you here”.

You let out another laugh, not only because of how happy his words made you, but because of the way he later grabbed your face once again to start peppering kisses all over it.

“Yah, Jeon Jeongguk!” you called him out in between giggles. “We’re in the middle of the hallway”.

He laughed, pecking your lips one last time before he pulled away. You just didn’t know how much it meant to him having you there with him right then when he needed you the most.

Without another word, he took his keys out of his pocket, like he had intended to minutes ago, and finally opened the door.

Stopping in his tracks, he turned around to look at you with a raised brow. “You’re coming in, right?”

You shrugged nonchalantly. “I mean, since you ask so nicely…”

Rolling his eyes at your overdramatic ways, he grabbed your hand, pulling you inside his place with him, not giving you time to even take a look around as he dragged you into his room.

“I don’t even get to say hi to Joon?” you teased as you closed the door behind you and he went to lie down on his bed.

“You can go say hi if you want” he replied simply, resting his weight on his elbows so he could properly look at you.

“Nah,” you shrugged, watching his nose scrunch up as his lips parted into a big smile when you started walking towards him. “I came to see you after all”.

“That you did” he contently affirmed, that being all he needed to let go of his intrusive thoughts.

Letting his back fall on the bed once again, he stretched his arm out on the mattress for you to go over there. Without another word, you crawled in bed with him, resting your head on his arm just like he wanted you to, scooting closer to him when his hand rested on your shoulder, and then resting yours on his chest.

“So how was work?” you tried to initiate small talk, tenderly running your fingers in circular motions from his chest to his abdomen.

The sigh that had escaped his mouth let you know not so well.

Work itself had been alright . What happened afterwards when he was heading home and Sooyeon texted him? Yeah, that had been shitty as hell.

“I blocked Sooyeon” he let you know.

Your head snapped up. “Hadn’t you already done that?”

“From Instagram, yeah” he nodded. “I blocked her phone number now. It can be a little awkward tomorrow when I see her but it’s the last day of filming, so I couldn’t care less”.

Although wanting to laugh —because, let’s be honest, that new piece of information could only bring you joy—, you ended up pouting in confusion.

“Something happened?”

“The usual,” he took in a deep breath. “She was talking shit”.

You nodded understandingly. Although wanting to know the details, you understood he didn’t really want to talk about it, for otherwise he would’ve told you by then. So, you said nothing, settling for pressing a lingering kiss to his shoulder instead.

“Is that why you were upset?” you wondered.

Jeongguk stayed quiet, both in awe at how you could tell he wasn’t feeling his best just by a couple of texts, and once again upset at the conversation he had held with Sooyeon earlier that evening.

“Kinda” he tried to shrug it off.

You puckered your lips, stopping your soothing motions on his torso and resting your palm on it instead so you could support your body up as you looked for his chocolate eyes.

“Was it because I went out with Tae?”

The way his body had tensed was all the answer you needed. However, he surprised you by shaking his head no.

“It wasn’t… I mean,” he sighed, pushing his hair back with his hand. “You guys are friends, it’s okay”.

You stared at him intently. Maybe he claimed it didn’t bother him, but his eyes right then, which remained fixed on the ceiling instead of your concerned ones, told you otherwise.

Placing your hand on his arm and giving it a light squeeze, you leaned in to briefly press your lips to his cheek. “I’m sorry,” your sincere words managed to catch his attention. “I should’ve asked if you were okay with it”.

He shook his head no immediately, sitting up and resting his back on the headboard. “You don’t need to ask for my permission to meet up with people, petal”.

“I know, but,” you shrugged, sitting up as well by his side and focusing your eyes somewhere other than his. “Everything is still kind of recent, I should’ve been more considerate of your feelings. I’m just so used to hanging out with mostly guys that I forget I have a boyfriend now and you—”

You caught on the way he had —teasingly— raised up a questioning eyebrow, making you mentally go over the words you had just said and panic once you realised how wrongly you had worded them.

“Wait, no!” you tried to correct yourself immediately, as he could no longer hold his serious semblance and started laughing. “I don’t forget I have a boyfriend, I meant that I forget you might not be very fond of—yah!” you called him out when his laugh did no longer allow your words to be heard.

“I know what you meant, petal” he reassured you, grabbing your hand and gently running his thumb on the back of it. “You look so cute when you panic”.

“Aish, you’re so annoying” you crossed your arms over your chest.

Chuckling at your cute annoyance, he took advantage of your folded arms to pull you towards him by them, having you instinctively straddle his lap after his lips collided with yours.

“You’re really okay with it then?” you asked one last time, cupping his face as he opened his eyes; watching the way they smiled right before he nodded.

He trusted you. Both you and Taehyung. He really did.

He knew the two of you were just friends. After all, he had told Taehyung it was okay for him to hang out with you from time to time back when they had The Talk. And he was truly okay with it. It was just that he couldn’t help being insecure sometimes, and Sooyeon’s words had only managed to increase that feeling.

He needed some reassurance from you, that was all.

“Just…” he licked his lips as he tried to find the right words. “You want to be with me… right?”

You answered his question with a slow, lingering kiss. One that left him aching for more, lips slightly puckered when yours left their touch. “I’m with you for a reason, bun” you cooed. “I mean, I am your girlfriend after all, am I not?”

He smiled blissfully, still feeling a wave of heat run up his body whenever that word was mentioned in reference to you, as he was not quite used to it yet. “Don’t go forgetting I’m your boyfriend then”.

Just as a light laugh escaped your mouth at his mocking remark, he entangled his fingers in the hair at the back of your head to pull you back into his lips, resting one of his hands on your lower back as you wrapped your arms around his neck the way he loved it, slightly opening your mouth to give him easier access to it.

And maybe it was the loose fabric of the oversized hoodie of his you had kept and were wearing that day, that made it so easy for his hands reach for your naked body underneath, or maybe it was just the way he had been craving you for so long, what made him dig his hands inside of it without a second thought — fingertips hesitantly tracing your skin and thumbs drawing circles on your waist for a couple of seconds before they trailed all the way up to the hem of your bra, where they stopped in their tracks and travelled to your back instead, as he didn’t want to overstep any more boundaries than he already thought he had.

Earning a small protesting whine from him when your mouth let go of his, you surprised him by digging your own hands under your hoodie and grabbing his wrists, causing a shaky break to abandon his mouth when you placed his hands on your breasts, just like that, giving him the last little push he needed to do what he was dying to.

“You can touch me all you want” you managed to say a little out of breath, not having time to feel shy at your own words under his piercing stare before his mouth was once more smashing on yours.

Enjoying the spoken consent you had just given him, he wasted no time in cupping your breasts, smiling in between your kisses at the way they felt so perfect in his hands — imagining how much softer they would feel without the lacy fabric in the way.

Letting go of one of them, he placed his hand on your bare back to pull you closer against his chest, giving the one still in his hold a firm squeeze that had you moaning against his lips.

And right then, he felt something he had not quite felt before. It was the way he felt his blood boil and the way he wanted more. He wanted to hear more of that melodic sound. He wanted more of you.

Only, the next second, it was you the one making a raspy moan come out of his mouth, when you grinded against his lap, providing him the friction he didn’t know he needed so bad.

Removing one of his hands from underneath your hoodie, he cupped one of your cheeks to keep you steady as he sucked your bottom lip into his mouth, tongue tracing its outline so you would open up. Doing as he wanted, you felt his tongue pleasantly massage yours, deciding right then you also wanted to feel his bare skin against your fingertips, not letting any other second go by before your hands were already making their way inside his black sweatshirt, feeling goosebumps form on his skin as your faint touch inevitably tickled his abdomen.

Letting go of his mouth, you planted a kiss to his jaw before making your way down to his neck, getting a gasp out of his mouth when you started sucking at the sensitive skin.

With the intention of keeping you still on his lap as your hungry lips worked on his neck, he placed both of his hands on your hips — momentarily forgetting about his own strength and ending up pulling you down roughly enough for you to unintentionally rub once more against his already hardening member.

“Fuck” he rasped, feeling you smile agains his neck before you rolled your hips one more time just to get another moan out of him.

Not letting go of your hips, if anything grabbing them tighter, he turned both of you around so he could be in control now. With your head hitting the soft pillow, and still taken aback by his sudden actions, you allowed his needy lips to attack yours once more for a while before they peppered small kisses all their way down to your neck.

“Jeongguk” you moaned when he thrusted his hips against your center.

He smiled, loving the tone his name had just came out with from your pretty lips. Wanting more of it, he did it again, going back to your mouth right in time to muffle the moan that had just escaped your mouth, as you could not be anything other than grateful at the fact he had decided to wear a pair of dark joggers that particular day, allowing you to feel his stiff member with little to no restraints.

With one hand holding onto your hip and his other one making its way back inside your hoodie and up to your breasts, he cupped one of them — his thumb giving attention to your nipple by making circular motions over the thin fabric of your bra and having you bite your bottom lip to hold back a moan.

Losing yourself into his pleasant touch, you rested your hands over his back, wrapping your legs tight around his waist, pulling his hips once more into your center. A satisfied smile curved up your lips at the way he had to let go of your mouth and buried his face in the crook of your neck to muffle the quite loud moan that had just escaped his lips — thrusting into you one more time just as you rolled your hips up to meet him there.

Breathing heavily at the ongoing friction, you let your hands travel down to the waistband of his joggers so you could pull them down and feel him up.

And although for just a second, you felt his lips abandon the spot they had been teasing on your neck — an almost inaudible gasp escaping his mouth as his body tensed up.

That was all you needed to stop.

“What happened?” you worried.

“Nothing” he was quick to try and brush it off, going back to pepper wet kisses to your neck.

“No, Guk” you lightly pushed him off you, cupping his face in your hands so he had no choice but to look at you. “If you don’t want t—”

“I want to” he stated before you could even finish your sentence.

Fuck, he wanted to.

“Then?”

Jeongguk sighed in defeat, managing to break free from your hold and letting his forehead fall to your shoulder. “It’s embarrassing…”

Your eyebrows furrowed, not understanding where he was trying to go with this at all. “You can trust me”.

He took in a deep breath. He knew he could trust you. He knew you would never make fun of him for such a thing. However, to him, his lack of experience, especially since you did have some of it, could only be something he felt insecure about.

“Bun…” you tried to reassure him, wrapping your arms around him and planting kiss after kiss to the side of his head.

“I’ve never…” his voice came out muffled as he spoke against your shoulder, making it harder for you to hear.

“What?”

“I’ve never had...” he spoke louder this time. “You know…”

He found delusional how hard it was for him to admit it. He had never really minded, to be honest. Whenever his friends teased him because of it he would just brush it off. It wasn’t that he was not interested in having sex, he was a young man with many needs after all. And it wasn’t that he didn’t feel ready either —or well, that until that evening, because it was fair to say he was freaking out now that it was you the one he was about to be with—. It was just that no one had ever caught his attention the way you had. There was never someone he felt the need to have this kind of intimacy with, until you.

That’s why, unlike with his friends, he did mind when it came to you. It was hard for him to admit it to you because, although he knew you’d understand, you could always be disappointed at his lack of experience, and it was precisely not being good enough for you what worried him the most, what had made him hesitate before.

“You’ve never… had sex?” you softly finished for him.

He nodded shamefully, and for a good couple of seconds you couldn’t believe him. Yes, he had told you once he had never been on a date, but dates are different than sex. For starters, you didn’t need to really talk during sex, which was what you knew troubled him the most about dates and just meeting people in general. Besides, with a guy as handsome as Jeongguk, you had been positive he must’ve been with someone at least once.

However, opposite to the disappointed reaction he thought you would have, he found himself relaxing under your touch when you pressed a kiss to his head.

“Gotta say I can’t believe and am kinda disappointed that no one ever tried to jump your bones before” your bold words had him laughing in a second, pinching one of your sides to call you out on them. “Seriously, bun. I mean, look at you!”

“Shut up” he mumbled, feeling his cheeks burn in embarrassment.

You chuckled, gently shoving his face with your shoulder to let him know you wanted him to look at you, making him feel at ease just by seeing the smile on your lips once he did as told. “It’s okay”.

“It is?” his voice came out uncertain.

You nodded, cupping his face. “Of course it is. I’ll wait for as long as you want me to”.

“But I want to” he pointed out embarrassingly fast, earning a light laugh from you.

“Then I’ll just wait until the moment’s right and you feel like going through with it without hesitating” you kissed his pink lips briefly — as if on cue, your heads snapping to the next room after hearing Namjoon drop something and cursing at it. “And until we’re alone and won’t risk being heard by our roommates, maybe”.

Jeongguk laughed at your last addition, leaning in to peck your lips three times. “I like the sound of that” he smiled, only for it to be erased when his eyes instinctively went down to the problem he had just been left with inside his pants. “I should probably, um…”

Your eyes followed his as they glanced down to his still hardened length. You had been too caught up on kissing him before to pay attention to it. But now, watching the outline of his erection poking through his sweatpants, you found yourself wanting more of him all over again.

“I can help you with that if you want” you couldn’t stop the words from coming out of your mouth, having his attentive eyes lock with yours in a second. “We don’t need to have sex for that”.

Jeongguk licked his lips, deep in thought over something he already knew the answer to. “Don’t feel like you have to...”

“I want to” you stated.

Simple as that, he found himself nodding — your determined eyes being the last push he needed to let go of the shyness he had suddenly been filled with and just give in to what he wanted, to what he needed.

With a smile curving up your lips, you gently stole a kiss from his mouth, sweetly pecking it a couple of times before you finally sucked on his bottom lip — a muffled moan coming out of his mouth when you gave it a teasing bite right as your hand palmed him over his pants.

“You have to be quiet” you reminded him with a light laugh. And for a second there you were kinda glad it wasn’t you the one on the receiving side, for you weren’t sure you’d be able to keep it down either at all.

Not being able to say anything in reply, he just nodded — a pretty eager nod that seemed more like one to move on from the topic already than one of agreement. Nevertheless, you had no intentions of stopping, (un)luckily for him.

Pressing another kiss to his swollen lips, you fidgeted with the waistband of his joggers just like you had intended to before. This time, he didn’t tense up, and you took that as your green light before you dug your hand in them.

“M—Fuck” he mewled when you took a hold of his cock, burying his face in the crook of your neck as you guided it out of his clothes.

Letting go of it for a second, you helped him on his back so you could sit up into a more comfortable position before wrapping your hand around it again, and right then you could’ve sworn you would never get tired of the pretty sounds that escaped his lips every time you touched him.

Gently, as you were just then discovering what it was he enjoyed the most, you started giving him a few pumps, trying to find the right pace for him and his needs.

“Baby, fuck” he breathed out, leaning his head deeper againt the pillow as he looked for some kind of support.

And it was the way he faintly thrusted his hips up into your hand, what let you know he was craving more. Not having to think twice, you sped up the pace of the way your hand moved up and down his length, tightening your hold on it just a little bit more.

“Mm… Just like that,” he let you know softly, as if suddenly remembering about the whole being-quiet-thing. “Just like that”.

“Feels good?” you wondered, enjoying the view of his furrowed eyebrows and closed eyes as he gave in to your touch.

“So good” he agreed.

Licking your lips, you stared down at his hard cock in your hand, giving it one last pump before your thumb slowly spread his precum over its tip.

“You alright with just my hand?” you asked and he was nodding before you could finish the question, which made you wonder if he had even heard it at all or was immersed enough in his own pleasure to agree to anything. “Or would you enjoy my mouth being wrapped around you better?”

His eyes opened as soon as the word ‘mouth’ was on the table, studying your face for a couple of seconds to make sure you were not playing with him in his vulnerable state. At the sight of your lustful eyes on him, however, he knew you were indeed very serious. And he’d be damned if he ever turned down such an offer.

“I want your mouth” although determined, his voice came out shakily.

Nevertheless, you were willing to comply with his wishes.

Jeongguk was on the edge of losing it when he saw you smile and make your hair out of the way right before you leaned down, removing your thumb from the tip of his cock so you could replace it with your tongue instead — a hiss escaping his mouth when you licked the traces of the precum you had just spreaded over it.

Giving him two small pumps, you allowed yourself to take him in your mouth; far from being able to take his entire length, yet enough for his body to tremble out of utter pleasure.

“Y/N…” he whimpered, fingers entangling in your hair as he desperately tried to control the overwhelming pleasure your wet mouth and tight lips wrapped around his cock were giving him.

Not once had he ever felt this good before, both your hand and mouth taking him places his hand alone could’ve never taken him to. And he was afraid he would come in your mouth anytime by then.

Pulling it out of your mouth, you threw him a small glance before you carried on — your tongue tracing all the way from the base to the tip, hearing him moan when you took him in your mouth a second time.

“Fuck, baby, you—ah,” he moaned when you swirled your tongue over his tip. “You feel so good”.

Enjoying way too much being the reason behind how good he was feeling, you decided to do him a favour and push him closer to his release for once and for all.

Slightly tightening your hold on him, you started once again moving your hand up and down his length, switching between the ministrations both your hand and mouth were applying on it, and knowing you were driving him over the edge when his hold on your hair tightened and his body trembled ever so slightly.

“Y/N…” he panted. “F-Fuck, I’m—”

His words were cut off by the heavy breath he had to take when you gave him one last particular pump, trying his best to hold on. Noticing that, you gave one of his thighs a squeeze to let him know it was okay for him to let go. And he was so desperate to reach his high right then, that your small gesture alone was all he needed to do so.

Closing his eyes, he found himself having to cover his mouth with his arm not to be too loud when his orgasm hit, feeling his warm release spreading into your mouth. Moving his hand up to cover his eyes as he came down from his high, letting himself get lost in the aftershocks of it, he missed the way you tasted his release in your mouth.

Cleaning the small stains of it left on the tip of his member, you adjusted it back inside his pants and went to lie down next to him, smiling adoringly at the way his chest moved up and down as he tried to catch his breath and tenderly removing his arm from his face, having his eyes find yours in a second.

“Was that okay?” you asked, softly removing a few strands of hair that had gotten stuck to his slightly sweaty forehead.

Jeongguk smiled incredulously, gently running his fingers through your hair to try and fix the mess he had made on it. “You even have to ask?”

And somehow that was all you needed to hear for the heat to reach your face, suddenly feeling shy at what you had just done.

Catching up on that, he pulled you into his arms, pressing a couple of kisses to your cheek before moving them to your mouth, where they remained for a little longer.

“You’re amazing” he said truthfully — the way he had said it, letting you know he did not just mean it when it came to sucking him off.

You smiled wholeheartedly. “Yah, don’t” your eyes focused somewhere else, feeling your face burn.

Jeongguk smiled sweetly, managing to draw your attention back to him by ever so tenderly caressing your cheek. Fuck, he loved you. And right then, with your eyes looking at him in a way he thought they had never when you were just friends, although unspoken, delusional even, he really felt like maybe you felt the same, too.

Tilting your face up just enough, he connected his lips with yours for what felt like the hundredth time that evening. “I’ll be good to you, too”.

You chuckled, loving the idea of it and kissing him briefly to let him know you did. You knew he would.

“When we’re alone, though. I won’t have Joon hear from me what he probably just heard from you”.

Jeongguk laughed, deciding to say nothing and instead pull you tightly into his chest and rest his chin on your head. And although he knew he might never hear the end of it from his friends, for once, he did not care what the rest had to either think or say.

#bts #bts imagines #jungkook imagines #jeon jungkook #bts smut #jungkook smut #kpop #kpop fanfic #bts fanfic #jungkook fanfic #bts fluff #jungkook fluff #bts scenarios #jungkook scenarios #bts social media au #jungkook social media au #bts x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #bts jungkook #jungkook

[sukirichi]

wine: ingredient 44 + sugar 7 + spice 12 for gojo satoru *slams table* thank you for feeding us kind maam

for sukirichi’s milestone event: 

the meal order : 🍷 + 44 (hate sex au) + 7 (forbidden relationship) + 12 (praising kink) your dinner has been served! also bruh LOL you’re a choso simp this is hilarious spspsps

— who are you to deny him when he only wants to worship you?

gojo satoru x fem! reader

contents/warnings: nsfw, slight angst, reader is hot girl shit, gojo long schlong, hate sex, car sex, spanking, riding gojo, slight angst, praising kink taken to a DIFFERENT LEVEL (i want to make people question the extent of their praising kink), body marking, rough sex lol it’s always rough in my stories, unedited

Your friends pushed you out of the club, all of you laughing, hands clutched around your waists as loud, drunken giggles fill in the night air. It was a wild night; your friends invited you to the club to take your mind off your stupid boyfriend. You thought you’d end up moping around, too much of a buzzkill to ever let loose because it wasn’t that easy to stop thinking about him, but even you were surprised when you started grinding with people on the dance floor just three drinks later.

The gals were more than delighted to see you enjoying your night, only dragging you out the club when you nearly shoved your tongue down another man’s throat.

Scratch that – your friends called you to hang out because you lied about having a shitty day at work. You’ve had your fair share of shitty days, but you were one of the most prominent lawyers in your firm, no one dared gave you a bad day. Your subordinates knew that if they even looked your way without your permission, you wouldn’t hesitate to dump paperwork on them, or assign them to the nastiest cases just to piss them off.

Yeah, you were sort of a bitch, but you didn’t care.

It took a lot to get where you were now. It wasn’t easy to be a woman in a male-dominated workplace and you were forced to strip your softness off, replacing it with hard armor and sharp tongue concealed under bold red lips, a tight pencil skirt that accentuated your curves, and a pair of black suede pumps.

You deserved all your success. You were smart, stunning, confident, powerful – so then why did you feel like shit around your shitty boyfriend?

The answer was loud and clear. It bothered you to no end that he wanted to keep your relationship a secret because his family was too different from yours, coming up with a shitty excuse that you were just “too different.” He never bothered explaining, and every time you confronted him about, he’d only wave his hand, distract you with those delicious and soft lips of his until you forget it over and over again.

You were okay with it at first. It wasn’t a really serious relationship; you only started dating him because you saw yourself a lot in him – confident, self-assured, maybe even a little cocky – plus, he was extremely attractive.

But the longer you spent time with him, you were beginning to fall in love.

Yes, you, the ice princess of one of the most respected law firms all over the city was beginning to soften up at a certain blue-eyed man who had magical hands.

But tonight – tonight you’d forget about him.

Your stomach was heavy with expensive liquor and you were nearly staggering on your knees, the only thing preventing you from falling were your more sober friends. The others were holding you close to keep you upright, while one of your friends moved to a quieter part of the block to call an Uber for you. Your friends were all happily married, some with children, so they couldn’t really stay out too late at night and chaperone you all the way back home.

You were well-aware you were being a bother, but fuck, couldn’t you lean on someone for just once? Sighing, you leaned closer to your warm friend, mumbling something about wanting to forget about everything you’ve been through.

“There, there,” she patted your head comfortingly, “You’ll be fine, babe, you’re a strong woman. I know you’ll get through this.”

“But I hate it,” you drunkenly admitted, lips trembling the more you thought about him, every stupid little thing about him – his soft white hair, those pretty blue eyes he always hid under shades even at night, his large, calloused hands that always felt so rough when keeping your legs open for him and you couldn’t even start talking about his cock, he was just so blessed and perfect in every little thing that you hated it. You hated him. “I don’t like this feeling,” you sniffled, “I feel like I’m being looked down on, that I’m being pushed to the side. I feel unimportant, like I’m not good enough.”

“Who said you aren’t?”

You froze in your friend’s arms, eyes meeting with those blue ones you could never get enough of. As if noticing your silence, your friend immediately covers you with her arm, glaring at your boyfriend. “Do we know you or something?”

“No,” Satoru replies coolly, brows furrowed in the state you were in. You turned away from him with a scoff, arms crossed on your chest. Why did he have to be here out of all places? Wasn’t he busy with work or whatever family shit he apparently couldn’t tell you about even though you’ve both been dating for a year and a half now? He just wasn’t giving you a break, and the hairs on your arm stood up when he said, “Not that you have to, but may I please drive Y/N home?”

“She’s not going anywhere—”

“She’s a friend of mine,” he insisted, turning to you with a pleading look in his eyes. You almost melted. Almost. “I need to talk to her about something.”

You rolled your eyes and stepped forward, your friend’s arm latching onto yours. You could tell she was worried from the way her gaze darted back and forth between you two. Satoru was, after all, clearly uninvited, and he didn’t seem like your type either. You always insisted you preferred refined man, men like his friend Nanami Kento, but alas, you were stuck dating this one instead.

“It’s fine,” you told her with a fake smile, “I’ll call you later when I get home.”

You never got to call her – simply because you didn’t make it home. The moment Satoru closed the car doors behind you, you both got into a heated argument. Satoru hated silences and always made sure the car was filled with music, but this time, he didn’t notice there weren’t any songs when you opened your mouth.

Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the anger and pent-up tension of not being able to hold him and kiss him in public like normal couples did, in addition to the fact Satoru never explained why he insisted on keeping you a secret – whatever it was, you just snapped.

“I don’t even understand why I’m still dating you!” you huffed, legs crossed on top of the other as you gazed out the window. Lips trembling, you tried so hard to not cry, especially not in front of the man who was breaking your heart. “This is hardly a relationship when I’m not free to call or text you as you please, when I can’t go out with you on dates and we’re always hanging in my apartment. I’m your girlfriend, Satoru, we’ve been together for a long time but I honestly don’t even feel like it. What the hell are we dating for then?”

Satoru clenched his teeth, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. “How many times do I have to tell you that I love you,” he said coolly, acting unbothered and unaffected as ever, but the clench in his jaw said otherwise. “If that’s not enough—”

“Of course it’s not enough!”

“I’m trying here too, okay?” Satoru slammed on the brakes and parked on a desolated spot, hands running through his hair while he breathed heavily. Once he’d calmed down, he shook his head, refusing to look you in the eye like a man. “I’m trying my best. It’s just hard. It isn’t as easy as it looks.”

“What isn’t easy as it looks? Dating me? Letting the whole world know I’m yours?” when Satoru didn’t respond, you scoffed, patience running low and thin. “You’re pathetic, Satoru. Dating you was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done, and I thought I was a smart woman.”

With a shake of your head, you slung your purse over your shoulder and reached for the car door. You were about to leave when Satoru suddenly pulled you towards him, his lips slamming into yours.  Like always, you fell into his trap, into the blissful pleasure that was his lips and his hands, and you hated it, hated him, hated him so fucking much because you were so tired of his entire existence.

You wanted to let him know he was insufferable.

You wanted him to feel the pain and misery he put you through.

“I fucking hate you,” you snarled as Satoru kept fucking into you, the entire car windows fogged and the vehicle shaking. “I wish I never met you, you asshole,” Satoru, displeased, only buries himself deeper into you, as if they would erase his mistakes and shortcomings.

Satoru’s large hands snake to your waist and onto your breasts, expertly tweaking them between his fingers. Your head fell back to the crook of his shoulder, your back pressed against his hard chest as Satoru trapped you in his strong arms, impaling you on his cock over and over again. “You’re lying,” he whispered into your neck, tongue and teeth playfully sucking at the tender flesh. His grip on your hip was bruising and possessive, and your breasts bounced fervently at how he snapped his hips upwards to feel your walls coat him and hug him tightly and warmly. “Why would you hate me, sweet girl? Don’t I always make you feel good? Don’t I remind you enough that you’re the best fucking thing ever?”

You didn’t respond right away, your breath taken away with how you could never get enough of this, of him. He was right no matter how much you denied it. Despite being terrible in everything else, Satoru knew and respected you, even admired your dominance and intelligence when other men were intimidated by it.

No, he worshipped you. He made you feel like you were a divine goddess when he tugged at your hair to tilt your cheek to him, his tongue slithering to your lips to taste himself on his tongue from when you previously busted his nut with just your mouth.

Lipsticks smeared on his cheeks and crescent moons on his pale thigh from your nails, Satoru looked wonderful beneath you like this.

He was beautiful, so damn beautiful, but it didn’t change the fact he’d put you through hell these past few weeks. 

No, it wasn’t just the past few weeks. Things were always complicated with him. He was perfect in everything else but when it came to you, he made it a mission to hide you and your relationship, changing your contact name to a totally random one “just in case.”

Your mind was confuzzled and you felt like you were on the urge of breaking apart from both his ministrations and his confusing treatment over you. Before you knew it, you were kissing him back fervently with the intensity of your hatred over this man.

Your hand reached his to guide it to rub at your clit, and Satoru, eager to make you feel good as always, happily obliged. Satoru kept bouncing you on his cock until you were too overwhelmed to speak, crying and mumbling incomprehensible words. 

Him, only him, would ever have the ability to let the sharp-tongued and intelligent woman who never bat an eye in court lose her wide vocabulary, falling apart in his arms while his long length abused your puffy lips.

“You made me feel like shit,” you finally admitted, tugging at his hair until Satoru is lowly groaning at the slight sting. But did you care? Of course you didn’t. You wanted to hurt him too.

“How so, sweet girl?”

“I can never have you the way I want,” you answered through gritted teeth, moaning out when Satoru suddenly thrusted too deep, hitting your most sensitive spot that had you quivering in his hold. “You don’t—” you gasped, “You don’t understand what I feel, how you make me feel like I’m never good enough for you. That’s the reason why you don’t want anyone else knowing, right? ‘Cause I’m not good enough for you, never gonna be good—”

Satoru didn’t let you finish your words, shutting you up with his cock instead. The vehicle shook uncontrollably with your mating sessions, and Satoru silences you by pulling at your leg to press it on his chest instead.

The sudden switch in positions had your muscles tensing and stretching, adding only to both your pleasures with the new thrown in factor of slight pain. You felt Satoru kiss your neck down to your shoulders, scraping his canines until you were absolutely lost. You gave in, you gave up, head lolling back next to his loving lips that murmured sweet nothings.

“Not true, sweet girl,” he reminded you, flattening you on his cock and making you roll your hips while you slid up and down his pole sensually. Unlike the previous pace, the slow sensation of your pussy hugging his cock with your arousal letting him slide in easily allowed you to feel every part of him, almost mind-wrecking at how good he’s able to make you feel even after such a long time of having him already.

“You’re the sexiest and most intelligent woman I’ve ever met, the best, the absolute blessing of my life, and I just want to protect you, sweet girl. You’re too precious for me to lose,” Satoru kept mumbling over and over again.

You could no longer process his words functionally, not when he’s slamming you down his length like that and burying himself in you as if he didn’t want to be anywhere else.

Satoru’s hands were still curious, appreciative and gentle as he runs his hands, dipping into all your curves and pressing into your most sensitive spots the way you liked it.

“You’re always so good for me so no, sweet girl, never gonna let you go, not when you’re so perfect for me,” Satoru eased your worries – temporarily – with his words, and you’d believe his lie, you’d fall into the same mistakes over and over again because you were just that weak and powerless when it came to him. “You’re made just for me, sweet girl, you’re the prettiest and your pussy is the prettiest – I worship you, I adore you. You’re so divine.”

You blamed it all on your ego.

He praised you so well, made you feel so good and always placed you on top of the world when he’s inside you like this. Even if you knew he’d knock you down the pedestal just hours later, you opened your doors for him all over again.

Satoru knew this too, because he rammed inside your walls and ruined everything that you held firm beliefs in, his large hands smacking your ass to urge you to bounce on him like you weren’t made for any other purpose than to be the woman he adored.

You lied to yourself – you always did – but did you care? So what if you couldn’t be the one he really loved? What did it all matter when you were the one he worshipped?

For the sake of the praise and the compliments, you’d let him fuck you and play with your heart over and over again. It was a toxic routine you’d never get tired of, and you no longer complained, forgetting about everything he’d done and every heartbreak he caused you because he was there, whispering into your ears how good you made him feel and how you were the only one made to take him, and you didn’t care. Not anymore – not when you were worshipped.

#gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x reader smut #gojo-satoru-x-reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #gojo x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #gojo satoru smut #gojo x reader imagines #gojo satoru x reader imagines #gojo satoru x reader angst #gojo satoru x reader romance #gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader smut #jujutsu kaisen imagines #jujutsu kaisen x reader drabbles #jjk #gojo x reader #jjk imagines #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk x reader #gojo x reader fluff #jujutsu kaisen fics #jujutsu kaisen gojo satoru #suki: 500 milestone event

[earlgreydream]

fed up.

| bucky x reader | smut |

anon requested. reader comes without permission and he punishes her by edging her everyday for like a week straight & your shitty week at work turns into you acting out at home and Bucky is absolutely fed up with your behavior

a/n: both of these are 🥵🥵🥵

cw: edging, orgasm denial, subspace, etc

“Watch your mouth,” Bucky warned after the second time you’d been disrespectful to him.

Your week at work had been incredibly stressful. Your boss had yelled at you, you got blamed for not getting things done on time, even when it wasn’t your fault, and you’d been overwhelmed to the point of tears. You were fed up, and it had put you in a bad mood. You were typically sweet, but the stress brought out your bratty side, and you just couldn’t help but let your frustration seep into your relationship. Bucky was not a dom to test, but you didn’t care.

“You can watch my ass as I walk out the door,” you snapped back, and Bucky turned to you, pushing his tongue against his bottom lip like he always did when he was mad.

“Come here.”

“I’m busy.” You didn’t look up from where you were trying to peel an orange.

“Come here, now.”

“I said-” you started, but he was on his feet and behind you before you could finish your sentence.

The fruit was pried from your hand, Bucky having no patience for your attitude. You were flipped so your back was against the counter, and Bucky grasped your jaw in one of his large hands.

“Knock it off with the fucking attitude.”

His gaze was warning, and you could tell that he was getting more and more frustrated with you. The look in his silver eyes was dangerous, a clear indication you were on your way to getting exactly what you wanted.

You glared at him, dead set on acting out. Your mood was sour, and you wanted to push Bucky’s limits. You wanted him to he as riled as you were, not caring about any consequences.

“What attitude?” Your tone was obnoxious, and Bucky couldn’t take it anymore.

He let go of your jaw, stepping back to look at you. Bucky took a second to breathe, and to think through his next actions, bringing his fiery anger down to a simmer.

He knew you were doing this to get a reaction. He was very aware that you were likely doing this to get him to bend you over the bed and spank you, that was usually the endgame to your brattiness. He was tired of your behavior, and he wasn’t going to give in to what you wanted.

He leaned against the counter opposite of you and picked up your half-peeled orange. You watched him finish it, and take a small slice before handing you the rest of it. He glanced at you briefly before walking back out of the kitchen, leaving you stunned.

You hadn’t expected that, and you followed him to the living room, where he returned to the novel he had been reading when you mouthed off to him. You watched him for a few moments before timidly climbing onto the couch beside of him.

His sudden calmness and disinterest scared you more than his anger, and your attitude crumbled to pieces. You were afraid to bother him, but you laid down with your head on his lap as he read. He set his hand on your side, his thumb lightly brushing over your top every once in a while. He got lost in the novel, and you were nearly asleep on him when he finished.

He finished the book and set it aside, looking down to see you dozing on his lap. You woke up as he carefully slid out from under you, and you watched as he went to shower.

You laid back on the couch, sighing from boredom. Your mind started to wander to what Bucky looked like in the shower, soap lathering all over his body. 

You unbuttoned your jeans and slid them down your legs, giving in to how horny you were. You closed your eyes as your hand traveled under your panties, getting yourself off to thoughts of your boyfriend in the shower. 

Bucky leaned against the wall and watched you, lured out by the sound of you moaning his name. He watched as you came around your own fingers, your back arching and a loud, high pitched whine leaving your lips. 

“You’re really trying to get into trouble, doll.”

Fear sparked through your belly at the sound of his irritated voice, and you quickly removed your hand. He was glaring at you, displeased by you coming without permission. 

“I didn’t think you would know,” you admitted honestly, having expected him to take a much longer shower, or hang out in the back of the house.

“No? So it’s okay to break the rules as long as I don’t find out?” 

“Well, no...” the whisper caught in your throat, and he raised an eyebrow at you.

“So what were you hoping to happen?” Bucky was causing embarrassment to spread through you, and you felt like a child being scolded for bad behavior.

“I just wanted to get off, because you didn’t-”

“You were acting like a brat, so I didn’t feel that I should help you.” 

The statement hung in the air, and your plan and deviance collapsed, your plan to blow off some steam with Bucky quickly fell into shambles. 

You didn’t need to explain yourself. Bucky knew your frustrations. Although he was sympathetic, it wasn’t an excuse for your behavior.

The thick silence made you tense, and you swallowed hard, regretting your infractions. Bucky helped you up and told you to go shower, going to busy himself with something else.

You were stunned, opting for a longer shower, a little anxious to face Bucky. When you stepped out of the water, he handed you a towel, waiting for you.

“I’m sorry,” you broke the silence.

Bucky pulled you toward him, giving you a kiss against your wet lips. You looked up at him, and he nudged his nose against yours before speaking.

“Dry off and go lay on the bed. No point in dressing yet.”

You nodded, doing what he asked, feeling sullen. The desire to push back against him and be a brat was gone, faded with his lack of aggression. You were afraid now, unsure of what he was going to do to you, because he certainly wouldn’t let your behavior go unpunished. 

You stretched out on the bed, opting to lay on your stomach, hoping your boyfriend would appreciate the view of your ass. Bucky slid his hands up the back of your thighs, squeezing you before pulling your hips up. 

“Just let me know if it hurts,” Bucky kissed the back of your shoulder before thrusting into you. A sigh escaped your lips and you squeezed the sheets between your fingers as Bucky maintained a steady rhythm, rocking into you and filling you up. 

“James,” you moaned his name, causing him to snap his hips faster against yours. 

You tightened around him, teetering on the edge of an orgasm. You couldn’t get there without any stimulation on your clit, and Bucky knew that. He had memorized every inch of your body, everything you needed, and everything you did. 

Your muscles went limp as you sank against the mattress, letting him pound into you until you felt him spill into the condom he wore.

“James, please,” you begged, pushing your hips back.

“Please what, doll?” Bucky was punishing you now, you realized.

“Please let me come!” 

You had twisted to look at him, and he flipped you onto your back in front of him before stepping off the bed to clean himself up.

“Next week.”

“Next week?” It was almost a scream, and he shot you a look.

“Gotta teach you not to be disrespectful,” Bucky kissed your lips, and you pouted, upset by the aching you felt from your needs being unfulfilled. 

“I’m sorry.” 

He laid down with you, letting you curl up in his arms. He held you tightly, kissing you until you grew so tired you couldn’t stay awake. 

Every day that Bucky got home from work that week, he bent you over whatever surface you were on, fucking you roughly but keeping you from orgasming. By the fourth day you were crying, aching with a more intense need than you had ever experienced.

“Please, I’ll be good, Bucky, I’m-” you whined, tripping over your words as you begged him, only to be shot down with the sweet smile that hid sadistic pleasure of you being denied.

Being denied had put you in an especially subby headspace, and when Bucky was around you clung to him. He made sure to take extra good care of you, knowing you were being good and not getting off by yourself. You’d learned your lesson, hesitant to ever do it again after the week you’d been through.

When it was finally the end of the week, you were almost in subspace from Bucky just picking you up and carrying you to bed.

“You’ve been so good doll, I’m so proud of you,” Bucky kissed you as he laid you down on the mattress, practically tearing your clothes off of you.

“I want to be good for you, James.”

He looked into your wide, glassy eyes, and he pressed his lips against your forehead, reassuring you that you were good, and you made him so happy. You slipped into subspace, your mind clouding up. Bucky recognized the signs, and he kissed you all over and loved on you.

“I’m going to let you come. Sound good, doll?” Bucky hummed against your skin, and you nodded.

“Yes, please.”

He smiled at your sweet voice, dropping between your legs. Your fingers tangled into his hair as his mouth pressed against your sex, his tongue moving through your folds and swiping over your clit. Your whimpers mixed with the lewd sounds of Bucky eating you out, knowing it was the fastest way to get you to come. He loved the feeling of you tugging on his hair, and he pushed two fingers into your heat, dragging against your g-spot while his tongue continued to work at your nerves. 

You were crying his name as your legs shook, the pressure finally snapping and granting you the release you had been so desperate for. His name echoed off the walls as you screamed, tightening your thighs around his head. 

When he drew up, a pleased grin adorned his face. You struggled to catch your breath, the aftershocks sending little jolts through your body. He couldn’t stop smiling at how adorable you were, and you reached up to him with weak arms, wanting him to hold you. You stammered his name softly, still deep in the subby clouds, and he gave in once he cleaned his face.

“I’m coming, doll, no tears,” he hummed, pulling you onto his lap.

“Don’t like it when you edge me,” you whispered, mumbling softly. He laughed and you buried yourself deeper into him, pulling the blanket tighter over the two of you.

“I’m done edging you,” Bucky promised, handing you a glass of water and gently urging you to drink it. He went through all of the steps of your aftercare, his full attention on you as he broke you out of your cloudy head. 

“Next time I’m upset from work, can you just bend me over your knee?” You teased Bucky shyly.

“If you ask nicely.”

You promised to be nice, grinning as he squeezed you in a hug.

#bucky #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #james buchanan barnes #winter soldier #the winter soldier #the falcon and the winter soldier #falcon and the winter soldier #bucky x reader #Bucky x reader smut #bucky x reader fluff #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x reader smut #bucky barnes x reader fluff #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #winter soldier x reader #winter soldier x reader smut #bucky barnes au #avengers #avengers au #tfatws #fatws bucky #fatws #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes fluff #dom!bucky #the falcon and the winter soldier smut

[butwhyduh]

Fit to be Tied

Jason Todd x reader

Warning: Christmas? And the f word.

Christmas series 2

Jason didn’t pay much attention to holidays. Nope. That was for the living. He didn’t have much of need for it. But he did know that Christmas was quiet and New Years was busy for patrol. He guessed everyone ate Christmas dinner and and then got bored of playing nice. Or maybe that just wanted to start the new year with a big ass bang. Who knows?

Even when he was a kid, he didn’t celebrate the holidays. Too poor, mom too lost in drugs, and dad? Well fuck him. He was a piece of shit when he was around.

Jason kicked a beer can out of his way into the pile of trash on the sidewalk. They didn’t get the trash again this week it looked like. Daddy Bruce could play bat but couldn’t throw his money around enough to keep trash from piling on the street.

It was fine. He had more important things to do anyways. He had to buy a Christmas present. He didn’t care for the holidays but the sweet girl he had at home was a doll and fuck, if she didn’t deserve something. So Jason went down to the local pawn shop. Usually not a problem but it was 2 AM. Not exactly prime business hours.

So yes, Red Hood was breaking into a pawn shop to get a bracelet. He was leaving cash, $20 over the cost too. It was something you had seen earlier in the week and had admired. Gems of some kind shaped to look like a butterfly. You’d taken a minute longer to stare at it.

He left as quick as he came. And it wasn’t long until he was opening the window of your apartment dressed in street clothes. You were asleep. Jason had used the excuse of patrol to get out. But in the early morning hours of Christmas, he wanted to wake you.

“Princess,” he said gently. You moved a little before opening your eyes. You smiled up at him. Fuck, he didn’t deserve the way you looked at him. Your eyes looked so innocent and sweet. You never looked at him like he scared you.

“Jaybird, what’s going on?”

“I got you something for Christmas and it’s technically Christmas..” he said pulling out the box. You sat up, curious.

“It’s Christmas Eve. You got me something? I didn’t think we were- I didn’t get anything. I couldn’t-“ you said turning red. Money was too tight to consider it. The fact that the heat was still on this late in the month was a Christmas miracle.

“No no. It’s fine. Just being here is enough for me. I’ve never really celebrated Christmas anyways,” Jason said pushing the box in your hand. You held the box before kissing him.

You opened the box to see the bracelet you had been looking at the pawn shop. You smiled and stared at the pretty little butterfly. Jason watched you carefully for a reaction. He’d never admit it but he was more nervous now than fighting on the street.

“You saw me looking at it. I didn’t think you’d notice,” you murmured softly as you picked it up. Jason took it and wrapped it around your wrist. He clasped it on and you looked at it, moving your wrist in the light.

“Thank you. It’s beautiful,” you said quietly looking at it. You had a little grin on your face. Jason smiled. That’s the look he wanted. That little bit of happiness that you showed when you were really pleased. He intertwined his fingers in yours.

“Princess, you’re so cold,” Jason said with a frown. He could feel it colder outside but now that he was getting used to the temperature, it wasn’t warm as it should be.

“The heater was acting up again so I turned it down. The blankets are plenty warm,” you said and his heart all but broke. There was no way he was going to let you be cold all winter because the landlord wouldn’t fix things. He might pay this guy a visit. You sensed his anger.

“It’s okay, Jay. Come lay with me and get warm,” you said taking his hands. He let you pull him into bed. He kicked off his pants and shoes and laid on his side. You curled into him as a little spoon. His long big frame all but engulfed you. It always felt to protective. If he was holding you, he knew you were safe. Jason ran his fingers along your bracelet soft as his rough fingers could.

“You’re so good to me,” you said softly and his heart clenched again. Fuck, if you knew all the bad he did. His messed up past. He thought you would have run away when you first learned he was Red Hood but no, you had been kind.

“Naw, Princess you deserve more then this shitty place,” he said, and for the first time, he felt a little bad about giving all of his trust fund to the soup kitchen he would visit as a kid. A little would have been nice to get a better place for you. But he had been making a ton crushing the drug trade at the time and didn’t have a girl back home when he did it. He couldn’t be as reckless now.

You turned in his arms to look in his blue eyes. He has such an intense look on his face that you frowned. “Jaybird, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he said pulling his face back to normal. “Just thinking. I wanna move you to a better place, a safer place than this,” he said running his thumb across your cheeks. You grasped his wrist and leaned into his touch. Jason would sometimes get like that. Thinking you deserved better. And you humored him even though you wouldn’t even know what to do with wealth.

“We’re moving. Soon. I’m promising now,” he said thinking about the painful conversation he was going to have with Bruce. His adoptive father he hadn’t even told you about. Bruce would do just about anything Jason asked. Probably the guilt of letting him die.

“But Jay, we’d miss the water that went from boiling to freezing at random. And I’m not sure if I can sleep without Mr and Mrs Jancowski having sex every Tuesday at 2 AM,” you said with a smile. He kissed you to shut you up. You were joking but each one felt like a little knife in his guilt. You pulled him over you and the thought of money troubles faded from your mind.

———————————————

Jason woke before you and watched you sleep. You laid on his chest with your hand in his hair and your soft breath on his throat. The bracelet was still on your wrist. You looked so peaceful, trusted him while you slept. Jason carefully grabbed his phone and texted Alfred. He’d also have to tell you about his adoptive family. His very famous adoptive family.

He threaded his fingers in your hand that was flung across his waist. You began to stir. Jason moved hair from your face and you blinked to see his pale blue eyes watching you.

“Morning, Princess,” he said with a rough morning voice. You smiled.

“Morning, Jaybird.”

“I’ve got something to tell you,” he started. “I want you to meet my family tonight.”

“Tonight? Your family? I thought your parents...” you trailed off.

“I was adopted. I never told you because I don’t have the best relationship with them. But I think it’s time for you to meet them. I’ve got to tell you something else,” he said and you could hear his heart beat quicker as you laid on him.

“My adoptive father is Bruce Wayne.”

Silence.

“You’re shitting me.”

“Nope. And tonight I’m taking you to meet him. And my adoptive siblings.”

“You aren’t joking,” you said sitting up. Jason sat up too.

“I’m not. I’m kinda the... black sheep of the family. He adopted me when I was 12. I was trying to boost the wheels from the b- Bentley he was driving,” Jason corrected. It was one thing to tell you he was Red Hood. He couldn’t say Bruce Wayne was Batman.

“Wow. I- wow. Okay. That’s a lot to take in. Also on brand to be honest,” you said and he smiled and shrugged.

“Wait. What the fuck do you wear to the freaking Wayne manor for Christmas Eve?” You said a little panicky.

“Whatever you want. It’s just family,” he said with a sideways smile.

“Oh no. I can’t go to freaking Wayne Manor in a Kmart sweater,” you said quickly.

“You can wear,” he said hopping out of bed. He dug way in the back of his closet for a pretty red sweater that was slightly oversized. “This. Should fit fine. Pretty expensive too.”

“Where the hell did you get that?”

“I’ve had it for year and it definitely doesn’t fit now,” Jason said with a laugh. “Try it on.”

—————————————

The weather sucked. Freaking sleet that threatened everything it touched. You were grateful it wasn’t a night of Jason patrolling. This meant taking your car instead of Jason’s motorcycle. Your car was at least 15 years old and you called it Frankenstein because of all the repairs done over the years.

The radio skipped as Jason drove over a speed bump by Wayne Manor and you burst out laughing. Jason looked at you from the side.

“It’s not that funny,” he said. “What’s up?”

“My car is trash, I’m wearing your old sweater, and we’re late. If you weren’t the black sheep before, bringing me home, you will be now,” you said. He grabbed your hand and parked in front of a random house.

“I’ve been the black sheep since I was a kid and you aren’t going to change any thing for the worse. Trust me. In fact they’ll probably think you’re too good for me,” Jason said with a dry chuckle. “So don’t worry about anything. Except making room for pudding. I know it sounds weird,” he said starting to drive again. “But it’s the best part of Christmas.”

Wayne Manor was huge. You knew that. You’d even seen it on tv. But to see it in front of you was honestly terrifying, especially in the nasty weather. You almost hoped Jason was playing some weird elaborate joke and was going to drive on by but he knew the passcode to the gate. He drove in the covered drop off spot by the front door and parked. You both quickly ran in the building.

The front entry was breathtaking. A gigantic Christmas tree and a full staircase decked out in garland like a Hallmark movie. It was like a magazine. In fact, it was in the Christmas episode of Gotham Life the year before.

You gripped Jason’s hand tightly as you walked down the hall. Your shoes sounded unnaturally loud and you had the urge to quiet them like it was a library. Jason pulled you to the doorway of a dinning room full of people settling to eat. Jadon cleared his throat.

“Master Jason! You made it,” Alfred said excitedly. “I recieved your message but it’s been many years. Sit. Sit.”

“Glad you could come,” Jason’s brother Dick said with a grin. He looked at you in curious excitement. You looked down at some kind of mushroom soup placed in front of you. Everyone else was dressed so nicely and ate so perfectly. It was intimidating.

“Yeah, it’s Christmas,” Jason said shrugging. He gave Dick a look that said don’t ask. It didn’t take much for Dick to drop it because he seemed incredibly distracted. You spent most of the meal trying to keep up on conversations you clearly didn’t understand while trying food you’ve never seen before. You could barely remember everyone you were introduced to. One of Jason’s sister(s?) gave you a big hug along with everyone else when she arrived. You couldn’t tell anyone what was even said after the meal. Or so you thought.

Until right across from you, Dick proposes to his girlfriend. He stuttered around before finally asking. “Will you marry me? Oh god, I have a ring,” he said producing one. Everyone watched as she stared in the box.

“Will I marry you?” She asked faintly and you worried she’d say no. How terrible would it be??

“Please say something,” he pleaded and you could tell the man was practically in pain before she said yes. They kissed, the family applauded, and champagne was served.

Jason watched you from the corner of his eyes. How did you react to this? What did you think? You didn’t look jealous or anything. It made Jason think of marriage. He hadn’t before. He’d thought about moving into something more permanent but marriage. He’d never thought about marriage as his future, ever. Of course when you die at 16 and come back with a vengeance, love is low on the priority list.

“Jaybird, you there,” you asked slightly tapping his shoulder. He blinked and looked at you.

“Yeah, I’m here. Just in my head,” he said and you nodded. He’d do that sometimes.

“The party is moving to the parlor,” you said quietly in a proper rich Gothamite voice and Jason huffed before covering his smiling mouth with a nose rub. The rest of the group was moving ahead of you. Dick and his new fiancé were retiring for the night.

“I’m never going to hear the end of it, am I?”

“I’m so sorry, dearest. I can’t understand you with a silver spoon in your mouth,” you laughed. Jason rolled his eyes before guiding your shoulders towards the door. You heard a soft laugh behind you and you turned to see Tim’s girlfriend smiling.

“Sorry to interrupt but I’ve got to use that on Tim,” she said grabbing her coat and walking out.

After making sure you were cool with hanging with Tim’s girlfriend and their adoptive sister Cass, Jason and Tim started a very competitive game of pool. You couldn’t help but look at things that cost more than you’ve ever even seen. The chess set Damian and his girlfriend were playing with probably cost more than your car.

But it was Christmas and you tried to push your insecurities aside. It was a fun evening. A glass of wine you kept sipping on helped as well.

After a while Bruce announced that the roads were too bad and that no one was leaving. Jason clenched his jaw for a second before looking at you and relaxing. He didn’t want to stay but he wasn’t risking your health in any way. Instead he focused on the game.

“So if I win,” Jason said a full hour later. By this time, Damian’s girlfriend had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Your eyes felt a little heavy as well. “I get the penthouse.”

“Sure Jay. That’s Bruce’s. But I’m willing to gamble it,” Tim said throwing his hands up at the ridiculousness.

“I accept terms,” Bruce said. Both boys looked at him surprised. “Whoever wins gets the penthouse.”

You turned quickly to watch the game. Okay, is that a normal thing for them? To bet property. The look on everyone’s face said that no it wasn’t normal.

Jason was excellent at pool. It was a common for you both to go down to the pool hall and play some games. Jason would occasionally make some money playing and he did often as a kid. It was also a way to waste time when your mom was throwing beers back like a fish, like Jason’s mother did. Tim didn’t stand a chance. He wasn’t as good and looked almost like he was in pain occasionally. But maybe it wasn’t a real competition? Maybe Bruce was trying to give Jason something he’d always want to but didn’t know how. Jason easily won the game.

“So the penthouse is mine?” Jason asked. Bruce nodded and shrugged. Tim softly coughed in his hand. Your heart raced. They couldn’t be serious.

“If you’ll live in it,” Bruce said. Damian was carefully carrying his girlfriend upstairs.

“Deal,” Jason says quickly.

“Deal,” Bruce said looking quiet pleased. Was this his plan all along?

“I guess, deal?” Tim said confused. “Though you should owe me. You’re the one that got me shot.”

Your brain broke. He was shot? And it was Jason’s fault?

“What?! You got him shot?” Tim’s girlfriend asked loudly. Tim blanched.

“Not my fault.”

“Literally your fault,” Tim countered.

“What did you do?” You asked looking at him suspiciously. He offered you a sheepish smile.

“I might have said ‘what are you gonna do, shoot us?’ I meant me. Not Tim! He also has a bulletproof suit,” Jason said. Tim must be a vigilante too. You glared at Jason.

“That’s not in the report,” Bruce said with his eyes narrowing.

“Good night everybody. Merry Christmas,” Jason said pulling you from the room and up to his childhood room.

“You’re in so much trouble,” you said and he grinned.

“I’ll deal with it tomorrow. How do you feel about a penthouse? Better than our current place hu?” Jason said pulling you close. You felt dizzy at the idea.

“Seriously? We can’t afford it,” you said trying to stay grounded. It was too good to be true. Things like that didn’t happen to people like you.

“I think I know a guy who can keep the lights on,” he joked and you gave him a serious look. “Don’t worry about it. Just enjoy the idea of constant hot water. Lights never going off,” Jason said pushing you towards the bed. “No one can hear me make you scream.”

“Tempting. Very tempting,” you said and of fucking course it was. A safe beautiful clean penthouse over your trashy scary apartment wasn’t even a contest. Jason pushed you on the bed and hovered over you.

“What are you doing,” you asked flushed but still encouraging him. It was still his dad’s house and he was getting handsy.

“Trying to have sex with my girlfriend on my old bed like every guy ever has dreamed of,” Jason said. He nipped at your throat. You gasped.

“Got to be quiet, Princess,” he whispered and you pulled him down to kiss more.

————————————

The next morning you woke to an empty bed. You fixed your hair as best you could and threw on Jason’s sweatshirt before going downstairs. You caught a glimpse of the kitchen as Bruce slowly slid a set of keys Jason’s way before taking a long drink from his coffee. “I’m glad you made home for Christmas this year, Jason.” The penthouse.

“Morning,” Bruce said to you nodding before leaving the room. Jason was alone in the kitchen but you could hear others in the breakfast nook a door over.

“Keys,” Jason said showing you. “And no lecture.”

You gave him a hug and looked at the shiny metal keys. It would be a while before you could handle the idea of a freaking penthouse being yours. “But you should get something for Tim. You did get him shot.”

“Let him shoot me?”

“Jason, no.”

#fns #Jason Todd x reader #Jason Todd #red hood #red hood x reader #Jason todd fluff #christmas series

[hareharrison]

hold me

pairing: george harrison x reader

summary: george is in the process of finishing abbey road, and has been repeatedly coming home frustrated. instead of talking to you about it, he distances himself completely, and only speaks to you in annoyance or anger, and lashes out on you. he doesn’t know how much it affects you and one day comes home to the effects firsthand.

warnings: hurt/comfort, angst, angy geo, neurodivergent reader, invasive thoughts, mental breakdown/panic attack, but it works out in the end

a/n: hayyyy ok so i wrote this as a comfort fic for myself, and i decided to post it cause why not. i struggle with intense fear of abandonment cause of bpd haha fun 😐and wanted to make it from the POV of a neurodivergent reader?? so this is like a comfort fic for ND readers?? idk if i need to put any other potential trigger warnings for this but if i do please lmk and i will fix it

year: 1969

the flat was quiet without him. to be honest, it was quiet with or without him, lately. as much as you didn’t want to admit it, george had been distant. he was always a quiet person, but he has never dismissed you this much. you knew that his job could be tiring and you tried not to overthink it, but you couldn’t help but feel bad. a voice in your head was planting horrible ideas, saying things like, “you fucked up, he doesn’t like you anymore, you’re annoying.” but still, you pushed on and tried your best to ignore the noise in your brain.

you sigh heavily and slide back into the couch. you had the next two days off of work, and nothing to do. george of course had to work on your days off, which left you alone at home. with your thoughts. it was hard getting through today, your intrusive thoughts were particularly loud... but he would be home any minute now, which brought on a bit of hope; seeing him should rid you of your own jailhoused mind.

the tv played some sitcom in front of you, which you had no interest in. all you could think about was if you ruined things. what if he was thinking of leaving you? it would be your fault... and yet you couldn’t think of a single thing you’ve ever done that might have hurt him.

the door opened gently and let in a cool draft that brushed against your warm skin. you look toward the entrance, seeing your george sigh heavily with exhaustion as he took his shoes and coat off. he looked up to you, his boldly furrowed brows softening.

“hi, love,” he says, walking toward you. you stand and approach him to greet him with a quick kiss. he holds you for a little longer than usual, and you take the opportunity to melt into his arms and breathe in his smell, something you’d been deprived of recently. he rests his chin on top of your head, which laid comfortably on his rising chest. it was moments like this that made all your worries slip away, moments like this that you wished you could cling onto forever and ever.

“how was your day?” you ask, finally leaning back to look up at him. he lets go of you and runs a hand through his long hair.

“not good,” he says, a frown on his perfectly sculpted face. you return his expression at the sight of him being sad. quickly, you remember your dinner ideas. maybe that would cheer him up.

“hey, maybe we can go get something to eat? maybe get your mind off of things?” you suggest, looking up at his brown eyes. he looks down at you, eyes full of regret.

“i’m sorry love, but i’d rather just head to bed already,” he says remorsefully. you smile softly and reassure him that it’s okay and he should get some rest. but part of you breaks inside, knowing he doesn’t want to spend time with you.

he headed upstairs and you followed, the painful ideas returning at full speed.

“you’re so annoying, of course he doesn’t want to spend any time with you. you’re so annoying and clingy,” your brain says and you flinch at the harsh thoughts. through your entire bedtime routine, thoughts flooded your mind and filled your entire being up, and you felt like you were being drowned from the inside out. george stood next to you as you both brushed your teeth, not speaking a single word to you or giving you a single glance. you changed into one of george’s t-shirts and watched as he slid out of his clothes and into his pajamas in seconds. he muttered a monotone, “good night,” before turning on his side, his back facting you.

as much as you didn’t want to, you believed the mean voices and hung your head as you got into bed next to george.

you slept back to back that night.

————————————————————

the sun seeped into your room through your windows, and invaded your bed, waking you rather unpleasantly. you groan lightly as you reached over your bed for george, but only found empty space. his side of the bed was cold, indicating that he’d been up for a while now.

you sit up slowly, rubbing your eyes as the aromas of freshly brewed coffee and morning dew hit your senses. you hear the song of the early birds chirping as your feet hit the cool floor. as you head downstairs, you can hear george on the phone, and you soon see him muttering softly before taking a long drag from his cigarette. you don’t bother him, seeing that there was paperwork on the table and his call must be business related. naturally, you decide to head for the coffee, the smell luring you in like a fish.

you poured the hot, dark liquid into your favorite mug and add in your preferred amounts of cream and sugar. looking out the window, you see water drip gently from the leaves of a tree that george and you had planted a year ago. you sip your coffee and reminisce about the times you used to actually spend time with george. how nice it was, seeing him smile so often.

you suddenly hear george raise his voice at the phone, something unlike him entirely. you jump at the unpleasant sound before peeking through the hallway to see what on earth was happening.

“no, i don’t care! i want the bloody bastard fired, in fact, tell him not to bother showing up today,” he shouts into the phone before slamming it down, placing his head between his knees and groaning in frustration. seeing george this upset and acting out on it was truly a rare sighting, and you thought carefully about what to next.

after careful consideration, you tiptoe into the room and gently rest a hand on his shoulder, the sudden contact making him flinch.

“christ, (y/n) are you trying to give me a bloody heart attack?” he grumbles before lighting another cigarette.

“sorry,” you say softly, “would you like some tea?” you figure it could calm his anger and soothe some of his abnormal irritability.

“what? tea? there’s already coffee made,” he says rudely. you take a step back, saying nothing. you know that you didn’t do anything and that this behavior would pass. george was never like this. your eyes find the time and see that george should have left ten minutes ago.

“george, you’re gonna be late to work,” you say, thinking you could at least do something helpful. his head snaps back at you and his once soft face turned hard with anger.

“what are you implying? you want me gone?” he stands up and angrily grabs all of the papers scattered on the table, shoving them into a folder and the folder into his bag, “fine, i’ll leave. im out the door.”

you look at him in confusion, you’d barely woken up and were just trying to help, “what’s the matter with you?”

“what’s the matter with me,” he repeats, looking away and scoffing. he runs his hand through his hair in frustration, “im sick of this, (y/n)! im sick of life. i come home exhausted and you have half a mind to ask me if i want to talk about it!”

“you always want to go straight to bed,” you defend yourself, hurt that he would even suggest that you don’t care about him. his dark eyes glare into your own for a moment that feels like hours, trying to think of somethig clever to say in response, but he just wasn’t ever much of a fighter. he finally chooses to put his cigarette out on the table’s ashtray and grab his coat. if you wanted him out of the house, he was more than happy to comply.

“george-“ you start.

“no,” he cuts you off, “don’t say anything right now, i can’t even look at you.” and he doesn’t, he ignores your presence entirely as he picks up his bag and walks out the door.

you’re left in the cold house, alone, hurt, and dumbfounded. you couldn’t believe what had just happened. you couldn’t believe that george, your george, had taken his anger out on you, simply for trying to help his morning be less shitty. worse than that, he thought you wanted him gone, when all you wanted was to be with him. is this how it was going to be now? a bitter, loveless relationship? your eyes sting with fresh tears at the thought, and a huge lump in your throat grows painfully. you take a deep breath before heading upstairs. you wanted anything but to cry this early in the morning, and the only reason you got up somewhat early was to see george before he left to work. now that your morning was ruined, you figured heading back to bed was the next best thing.

you climb back into your shared bed, suppressing your emotions with the warmth of your fluffy blankets and soft pillows. the comfort of a bed felt almost like a hug, and you sighed, letting the pain drift away as you fell asleep.

————————————————————

when you opened your eyes, the realization hit you. you’d slept until the sun began to set, completely ignoring your emotions, stuffing them down inside of you like an overflowing trash can. being awake made them fling right back at you; sleeping didn’t change a thing, and was only a temporary pause in your pain.

all of your feelings came back to you at once, and it once again felt like you were drowning internally. only this time, the thoughts weren’t the invasive factor. your emotions were overwhelmingly intense on top of your brain practically screaming horrible things to you. your breathing quickens as you feel tears slide down your face. this time you werent able to swallow the thick lump in your throat, and you began to weep softly.

this was it, george was leaving you. he hates you, he wants nothing to do with you. there was nothing you could do but hug your knees and cry. you choked on a sob and started rocking back and forth in attempts to try to soothe yourself. but you couldn’t stop, it felt like your entire world was falling apart. you soon began to have shortness of breath and struggled with your breathing, feeling your heart beat at an intense rate that you couldn’t control.

your bedroom door opens, revealing george’s early arrival. he immediately rushes to your side, afraid to touch you but wanting so bad to comfort you.

“(y/n)? (y/n), breathe. breathe, baby,” he takes your hand and you look at him. you aren’t sure if him being here is making the situation better or worse. seeing him try to help you stirred all kinds of feelings in your mind. you felt like you weren’t good enough for him, like you didn’t deserve his help.

george begins breathing in through his nose and out of his mouth, gently guiding you and hoping you will try to do the same. he sits in front of you on the bed and holds your face in his gentle hands. you look up into his eyes, the chocolate features of his face soothing you as your breath began to steady.

“that’s it,” he encourages.

“do you hate me?” you cry softly.

“what? no, (y/n), i’d give my life for yours, do you know that? you’re so, very special to me,” he slides over to sit beside you on the bed and wraps his long arms around you.

“why are you so distant?” you look up at him, and tears continue to roll down your flushed cheeks, “you acted so mean to me this morning, i feel like you want nothing to do with me.”

george is hurt by your words. he truly didn’t mean to be distant, and he never wanted to hurt you.

“i’m sorry,” he says, “ive been so overwhelmed i haven’t stopped to think of how you must feel. im really sorry my love i never meant to hurt you like this.” he embraces you tightly and you give into his comforting touch, wrapping your arms around his torso and digging your face into his chest. 

you take a deep breath, “i understand,” you say before looking up to him to whisper, “i miss you. i miss us.”

“i miss you too darling,” he pauses for a moment, “how about i take tomorrow off? we can do whatever you’d like.”

you sniffle, “what about the album? the deadline?” 

“i can fake sick. nothing is more important to me than you,” he says, “i want nothing more than to be with you. i love you so much.”

you smile when he presses a soft kiss to your aching head, “now how about we go have something to eat? i’m starved.”

#george harrison #george harrison x reader #the beatles #the beatles x reader #beatles x reader #classic rock #beatlemania #abbey road #revolver #rubber soul #please please me #60s #70s #classic rock fandom #classic rock fanfic #the beatles fanfic #john lennon #john lennon x reader #paul mccartney #paul mccartney x reader #ringo starr #ringo starr x reader #richard starkey #richard starkey x reader